rSlash - r/Choosingbeggars "PAY ME $600,000 TO DATE ME!"
Episode Date: July 2, 2019🛒 My merch: http://bit.ly/rSlashMerch r/Choosingbeggars This stuck-up choosing beggars views the guy she's dating as an infinite bank account. If you want to date this woman, you have to fork over... $600,000! WTF??? This is the most expensive date in history! Why on earth would anybody pay somebody that kind of money just to go on some dates with her? If you enjoy this choosing beggars video, subscribe to my channel! 💗 Support Me: http://bit.ly/supportRSLASH 🔔 Subscribe! https://bit.ly/2E3A8i6 👍 Like this video if you want to see more! 💬 Join my Discord: https://discord.gg/Rtwc9ZC 🐦 Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/rslashyt 🔊 Listen to my Podcasts: http://bit.ly/rSlashPodcast 🎧 My Podcasts on Spotify: http://bit.ly/rSlashSpotify Part 1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bYAjbGhp2Xs Part 2: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mg2o1_MKOLc Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Metrolinx and cross-links are reminding everyone to be careful as Eglinton
Cross-town LRT train testing is in progress. Please be alert, as trains can pass
at any time on the tracks. Remember to follow all traffic signals, be careful
along our tracks and only make left turns where it's safe to do so. Be alert, be
aware and stay safe.
Welcome to our Slash Choosing Beggars. We're a couple of entitled Choosing Beggars, miss
their flight because they can't follow simple instructions. Our first Reddit post is from
YuriBot. And this monstrosity as a resume. Megan Blink authorized to work in the US of A.
Yes, she actually wrote US of A instead of USA.
Willing to work three to five days a week.
Very dependable.
Must be off by 3.30 every day.
And the earliest I'm willing to work is 10 am. Cannot work with mayonnaise. It
grosses me out. And that's it. That's the whole resume.
Our next Reddit post is from Speedy's Knees.
Hey, I'm Emily and I currently go to blank. I am struggling a lot in English at the moment and I am trying to find a tutor that can
help me with my assignments.
I am in year 11 and live in blank, but I am happy to do tutoring in the library at school.
I would love to meet you as soon as you can.
Hi Emily, thank you for the message Smileyface.
I'm available for tutoring on Monday and Wednesday afternoons, meaning at Blank, or weekends,
can meet either at your house or the Blank library.
Let me know what suits you best.
I would like to do it at school.
My friend Ash and I both wanted to do it, so would you be able to do both of us for the
same prize at the same time?
No problem.
I can't do two for the price of one because it will mean
extra work for me. But I can give you a discount if you'd both like to do it at the same time.
My normal rate is 35 bucks per hour per person. But I'm happy to bring it down to 25 each.
Does this sound okay? I will talk to my dad and get back to you. Okay, smiley face. Then, her dad texts OP.
Hi, this is Emily's dad.
She contacted you about tutoring.
Would you be able to do both girls for $35?
They're both in high school still
and can't pay that much.
Regardless, John.
Hi, John, my normal tutoring rate is $35 per hour per person. I told Emily,
I'd be happy to tutor her and her friend for $25 each. I took into account that, although
I will be tutoring two people at once, which means more work for me. This also means
I won't be able to give each one my individual attention. Therefore, I think $25 each is a fair price.
No, $35.
$35 each? I did offer $25, but if you'd like to raise my rate, that's fine by me.
Please, Emily is struggling with English and needs your help. She is only in high school
and can't afford that much.
Regards. Yes, and I'm a university student and have to pay for my own expenses.
Sorry, but I've already offered to lower my rate.
She needs a tutor. She will fail because of you.
DUMMJURK!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. When the dad says dumb jerk, it's not really clear if he's referring to his daughter or
OP.
Ha ha ha.
I like to think that he's referring to his daughter.
She sucks at English that dumb jerk.
Our next Reddit post is from Trash Wizard NYC.
Eight-foot trampoline.
Free.
Free. Come get it. Works great. No cuts
or tears. Where was it made? Who has been on it? Very particular on what my kids touch.
It's free, a turd. Our next reddit post is from Madam Mayor Is Love.
Oh, man. The pool thing caused my aunt and uncle so much stress.
Some people think that a pool at a neighbor's house equals neighborhood pool, and would
just send their kids over wearing a swimsuit.
No asking first.
Just hey, here I am.
My aunt ended up telling everyone that parents could come and bring their kids swimming.
As long as they stayed with them the entire time.
But no uninvited drop-offs are walk-ups.
Man, a few people got so pissed off.
They truly felt entitled to have her lifeguard and sunscreen and feed their kids.
This comment from J.B.J.B.A.1234 down in the comments, we have a pool and a trampoline
in our backyard. One day, one of our neighbor's kids literally just walked in our front door
into our kitchen, uninvited, found my mom and yelled, I heard you guys got a pool! Alright, today I learned never install a pool or trampoline in your backyard.
Our next Reddit post is from Arzaten.
Why aren't you replying on WhatsApp?
Oh, sorry, I hardly go on there.
What's up?
Can you watch over Lily?
My aunt told me she'll pay 30 bucks if I watch over Lily tonight.
I said okay, but now I have plans with Ryan and Ari. I'll give you half, so like 15
for you, 15 for me if you watch over Lily.
WTF? Shouldn't I get the whole 30 if I'm watching over her? No, I really need the money. Just do it for me this once, please.
No, I'm actually going out with Dad today, so I can't. Maybe ask someone else?
There is no one else to ask. OMG, please, I really need this.
I can't, okay? I'm sorry, you should have asked me earlier.
That's not my fault, WTF, I effing hate you.
You're such a dumb jerk of a sister.
F-E-U, don't bother talking to me either.
This reminds me of another Reddit post
that I read on some subreddit and I can't remember
where it was.
But basically this IT dude had gotten hired from some big company to write code.
But instead of doing his job, he just sent all of his tasks to some like coding company
in India and paid them like 25% of his salary to do the work for him and then he submitted
their work to his company.
And meanwhile, he just spent all of his time at the office browsing Reddit.
Eventually, he got caught and got fired.
But here's the kicker.
All of the code that he submitted was spotless, which kind of boggles the mind.
If he was doing a good job, even in a weird way, why fire him?
Our next Reddit post is from Headwigs Bay.
Dating me equals $1,100 a month.
Rent is $300.
My nails $100.
My hair $100.
Taking me shopping at least $300, utilities $200, spending money $100.
If you date me, my bills are a package deal.
Either you support me or GTFO, heart.
So you know all those tropical animals like poison dart frogs that are bright colors,
which are a warning sign to other animals, meaning don't touch this thing or you will
regret it.
I feel like posts like this are the dating equivalent of a neon orange poison dart frog.
Our next Reddit post is from Little Pony.
Hi, can you take me today?
Let me know ASAP, otherwise I'll have to go elsewhere.
Hello, can you please answer me? You're my first choice, but I will go elsewhere if need be.
I guess you don't want my business. As a longtime client, I am extremely disappointed. I will not return as a client due to this behavior on your part.
And just to be clear, all these messages
occurred over the course of an hour and a half.
Hi, I'm sorry I was sleeping.
I'm off today, but if you'd like, I can see you tomorrow.
Can you take me today?
No, I'm off today.
I have tomorrow, Thursday, or Saturday available.
I need it for today.
Can you make an exception for me?
No I'm sorry.
I have plans with my kids today.
I can refer you to someone else.
I don't want to go elsewhere.
I can bring my daughter, she's 16. She can
watch them for the hour if you need. I really can't today. I can come right now or anytime.
Maybe when you get back, it's important that I get my lashes done today. Huh? My day
with my kids is very important as well, and I won't know when I'm coming back
and don't want to cut the day short. You're making me very uncomfortable, continuously
asking me when I keep saying no. Jerk! Worst customers' service! What's the point of
being a loyal client if it won't pay off. Such a jerk!
Our next reddit post is from FUNZIBOB.
A while back, this one.
Some backgroundo.
I'd once driven a friend who didn't wear their seatbelt
and copped a $300 fine for it.
Onto the story.
A family friend's son needed a lift
to the airport early one morning for a long plan trip.
I lived about 10 miles from their place, and the 30 mile trip I was taking to work, the
opposite direction took me right past the airport.
So it was a bit of extra time out of the morning.
15 miles to the west to pick up the suns, then 45 miles east instead of 30 east, but they begged and both phoned me, so I said
I was good to give them a lift.
I turned up in the morning, loaded up their gear and the sun's both in the car, and said
goodbye to their parents, and we took off.
Drove a few miles up the freeway and my seatbelt alert starts pinging.
Sun one in the front seat had taken off his seatbelt.
I asked him to put it on and he goes, nah, I don't do seatbelts.
So I pulled over.
Looked at the other sun in the back seat, which he didn't have alarms.
And sure enough, he'd taken off his belt too.
Then the arguing started.
I was blunt as I could be that I'm not risking my license and my money so they could get
a free lift I didn't care one way or another about.
Roughly as follows, paraphrase because it was years ago but they were both in on it.
I'm not moving the car unless the belts are on.
I've been fined once before not doing it again.
I told you I don't do seat belts. Dad's okay with it. I'm not and you, son number two,
yours on two. Not moving until they're on. Do you have any idea how dangerous they are in an accident. I blink.
Sun one then puts his behind him and clicks it in.
No, the belt goes around you, doesn't count.
It'll turn off the alarm.
Go, you'll see.
We need to get going.
We can when you put the belt on.
I don't give a flip about the alarm.
I care that it's a 600 buck fine if you two don't have belts on. I don't give a flip about the alarm. I care that it's a 600 buck fine if you
two don't have belts on. The other sun says, come on we'll be late."
Your flight's not for another hour and a half.
belts on sun one then calls his dad. Complains we've stopped and dad asked why.
Sun one explains then his dad tells him to just put the belt on.
Sun one says okay, but didn't notice I'd heard his dad's side of the conversation too.
And he said his dad says I need to get a move on.
Not until the belts are on.
This goes back and forth.
To the point, I will be late to work if I don't get going.
Sun 1 is all. Fine then. Turn around. I'll get Dad to drive.
Belts on then. No, I've told you already. Then we're not moving.
I get out my phone and browse idly, showing I'm not moving until their seatbelts go on. Sun won phones his dad again.
His dad sounds really pissed, but agrees to pick them up.
Both Suns get out, take their bags, one slams the door and boot, and I drive off.
Cheesy beggars left behind.
I get to work, then get a phone call that Sun 2 left his main luggage in my car, and
they want to drop
off at the airport urgently.
They're flying out soon and they need it now.
I tell them to get a taxi and I'll meet them out back at my work.
They decide to argue it's my responsibility to get them to luggage and again, argue
the point.
Half an hour later, one turns up in a taxi to get the other's luggage.
I should note here, I really don't know these guys well at all.
I know one's name for sure, and I think I know the other, but I might have him mixed
up with a cousin from the same suburb.
Later that afternoon, I get a phone call from their dad that I've wasted his son's
tickets.
They weren't able to fly out. Couldn't
rebook quickly, and they'll miss half their vacation time now. And it was all MY fault
for stopping for so long. I tried to explain as clearly as possible that I wasn't going
to risk another huge fine, and piss off my employer just for the inconvenience of a couple of grateful idiots.
But in and of just hanging up on them.
I'm so friends with her mother, who was the original friend of the family.
But things are a bit strained between me and her husband and sons.
I wonder how well the no Seepel strategy would have worked once they got on the plane.
Sir, we need you to put on your Seepel before the plane takes off off and if you don't, we'll have to remove you from the flight.
Our next reddit post is from FW Toxic. Hello, I'm interested in your newest thumbnail. How much does
it cost? Hi, it's 5 euros. Can you send it to me for free without the watermark? No, sorry,
I spent a good one hour and 30 minutes to make it.
Plus, the watermark is for people not to steal it
and claim it as their own.
Well, I can't pay now.
I could pay later.
And could you change the color from blue to red?
One, no, sorry.
You have to pay now.
Two, that would cost a little bit more.
Wow, you selfish freak.
Only doing this because of money.
Shame.
Just give it to me for free.
Nobody would want to buy this.
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Now a boarding business class.
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Terms and conditions apply as at mx.ca slash business platinum.
For your holiday season, real Canadian superstar has more legendary ways to save than any
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Until December 6th, get a free jumble point set when you spend $300 or more.
Plus, PC-opplum members can get select PC or no-name cheese at $3.99.
Conditions apply to fly for details.
Our next Reddit post is from MapleSairP420.
So my great uncle was a super cool dude.
Air Force worked on the fire service and on the rails.
Took a 1929 car and re-did it when he was 80.
Basically, every little kid's dream because of his stories and stuff.
Anyways, my great uncle had began to have health issues
in his older years.
This made him less active and therefore at home more,
which made him grouchy.
His wife and kids began openly discussing in front of him
how they couldn't wait for him to die,
how they wanted him gone so they could sell off
his stuff for money, how they knew they had a big inheritance waiting for them and they wanted it ASAP.
Well I'm sitting there in the other room next to Uncle hearing all of this and he turns
to me and just goes, that's what they think.
Minute those Creaton started wishing me dead, I rewrote my will and none of them are in
it.
They have money.
I'm giving my wife enough to live off for one year
and the rest is for my funeral
and to charities of my choice.
Well, Uncle died later that year at 98 years old.
It was a poo storm because everyone was expecting
to get hundreds of thousand each.
And there wasn't one of them who got a dollar.
My great aunt got something like
$5,000. The kids didn't get anything. He bought himself the most expensive casket the funeral
home sold and a mazzaliam for just him. I love that man. Man with several hundreds of thousands
of dollars, I think you could have built them
up a little miniature pyramid like the emperors of Egypt used to.
That was our Slash Choosing Beggars, and if you liked my video, please subscribe to my
channel and check out my merch store with the link down in the description.
We'll be back with more our Slash content right after this short break.
Welcome to our Slash Choosing Beggars, where we have the most expensive date on planet Earth.
Hello, guys.
I'm 21 years old and I have four kids.
They're six years old, four years old,
one year old, and five months.
I'm looking for a guy who's working
and will support me financially.
Also send my kids to private school.
Thank you.
So out of curiosity, I looked up the average cost
of private school and did a little math on this.
The average tuition for private elementary school
is $9,631.
Time, six years of school, times 4 kids, comes out to $231,000.
And the average tuition for middle and high school is $14,575.
Times 7 years of school, times 4 kids equals $408,000. Add it together, we get $639,000.
That's how much this woman expects you to pay her
for the honor of dating her.
Our next Reddit post is from PretentiousWitty.
Hello, you're the lady who teaches swimming, right?
I got your number from San Geeta.
Can you teach my son also?
Yeah, sure.
She said she offered to pay, but it is free.
Is that true?
I can't pay.
Free right?
I can't pay.
I'm a single mom.
Hello?
Please reply. Huh? Hello? Hey, yes, they're free. I'm in office.
I won't be able to respond right away. Wow, that's rude. I want to know what time
today I should bring my son to the pool. I'm sorry, but today I already informed
everyone that I wanted to swim alone today. I'll message you the next time I'm sorry, but today I already informed everyone that I wanted to swim alone today.
I'll message you the next time I'm teaching, probably after three days.
I usually teach the kids from 3 to 5 pm.
Can you come at 1 today and teach him?
1 to 3 is warmer than 3 to 5.
I know you have flexible timing.
Can you reply faster?
I can't teach at one because of work. It's already past
12 and today I really feel stressed and need to blow off some steam. I don't want to
teach today. I already told everyone that. From next time I'll inform you also. That's
not fair. I already told him he can go swimming today. Give him one good reason
to tell him. Else, he is gonna cry. One, I'm not teaching today. Two, I already canceled.
I can't un-cancel with everyone this late. That's even better. You can teach him alone. Those brats got
free lessons for a month. You need to make up for that with my son. What? I can't
teach just for your son. Why not? He has anxiety issues. You have to teach him
alone. I am not a certified trainer. I don't want to be
responsible for the safety of a kid with anxiety and a pool with depth twice
this size. I think you should get someone else. When I say anxiety, I don't mean
like that. He just doesn't like other kids. Just teach him exclusively for one
month. After that, you can put him with everyone.
They get more classes than him.
It is not fair.
So you should start teaching him from tomorrow at one.
It is better to be out of the pool by three.
That way, no one gets sick.
Also, he doesn't have goggles.
Bring an extra pair tomorrow
or let him use yours until I buy one.
I can't swim daily.
If I go swimming today, it will be at least two days before I swim again, and I'm not going to teach anyone exclusively.
Wow, you are such a selfish jerk! He is just a kid. Don't you have any heart? I am a single mom, and I already
told him. So, tomorrow at one? I can see that you have seen my messages. I will throw him
in the pool tomorrow at one. If something happens to him then you are responsible.
Whatever you are probably a lousy teacher.
You are such a nasty, horrible person.
My son doesn't need this.
I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Why is everyone so selfish and unhelpful these days?
You have flexible timing.
You work less hours than me.
You earn more than me.
Those jerks are rich enough that they can afford to get a swimming instructor, but no.
They want only free stuff that my son needs.
You are so privileged that you don't need money.
You effing refuse money that people are ready to pay. They are ready to give money and you
don't need money. Do you know how much I need that money? I am a single mom. You
should get the money from them and give it to me. You are privileged. You should
give it to me. I need it more than you. If
you won't teach my son alone, you should at least give the money to me. Reply me. I can
see that you read the message, jerk. This kid has anxiety. You think the reason for
that might be because her insane mother is planning on throwing
the kid in a pool with no safety instructors?
Yeah, I think I'd have anxiety too.
Our next Reddit post is from Vindictive Barista, and in this post, OP is trying to sell
a MacBook for $1,200.
What do you mean, how low?
The price is firm at $1,200. I paid 2800 Ford originally, so you're
still getting a really good deal. I was thinking 800 and I can also give you some jewelry I make
in exchange. I'm gonna have to pass, thanks. You don't realize how difficult it is to be a single mother around Christmas.
My kids have been begging for this all year.
And now I have to tell them that you let them down.
Does it feel good knowing you ruined two kids' Christmases?
I know it's a crazy concept, but I don't give a flip about your kids Christmas.
Instead of the grinch-stealing Christmas trees, I think you'd have much more success going
on Craigslist and taunting single moms.
Our next reddit post is from Craftycat.
Hey, your blankets are amazing.
Do you two commissions?
Hello.
Hi, sorry.
I've been out of town with my fiance.
Haven't been on Instagram much.
Well, that's not a very good business practice.
I beg your pardon?
Not responding to potential clients.
I'm sorry, as I said, I was out of town with my fiance. Is there something I can do for you?
Yes, a commission. That's why I messaged you in the first place.
Okay. I want a blanket in a Catherine's Wheel Stitch. You do know what that is.
Right, light gray, Light Blue, and Cream. Oh, and I would like it made out of natural fiber like wool or alpaca.
None of that acrylic garbage.
What size?
And I'm going to need to know what type of fiber you want because there's a big cost difference
in wool, alpaca, and acrylic garbage.
Wool.
And it's going to be a blanket for the couch, so it needs to be big enough for two
people to be under.
So let's say 6x7 feet.
So you want basically a queen size blanket.
Give me a couple hours and I'll get back to you on a price.
Okay.
Are you wanting thick or regular yarn?
Regular?
I don't want it super bulky.
Okay, I can make the blanket for 400 bucks.
I require a 50% upfront and the other 50% upon completion.
It'll probably take me three to four weeks to complete.
Uh, are you for real?
Yeah.
That is an insane amount of money for an effing blanket.
I can literally go to Walmart and get a blanket for $15. Then go to Walmart
and get a blanket. Seriously, how the F did you get that price? For a blanket? You want
a blanket that's a hundred percent wool. Not acrylic or anything artificial. A blanket the size you want is going to require roughly 4200 yards of yarn, which would require
me to buy 20 skins of wool.
The wool is 8 bucks per skin.
That would come out to 160 then, not for 100.
Plus craft stores are always having sales, so you could probably get the yarn for a lot
less.
The other 240 bucks is for my time.
That's insane!
You're charging way too much!
You want a wool blanket that is essentially queen size made of wool.
You want a complex stitch that works up extremely slowly. A blanket
as large as you're requesting in such a slow stitch will take me 120 to 150
hours. You're telling me that charging less than two bucks an hour is charging
way too much? Other crocheters can make it for so much cheaper than having made by other crochers.
You are insane.
I can't believe you think $400 is a fair price.
I need this blanket made.
It's for my girlfriend.
She's super ill and I want her to have something nice.
That's unfortunate, but it's still going to cost you 400 bucks.
You're insane!
You should give me a friend's and family discount or something since you took forever
to respond to me.
I charge friends and family more.
I'll tell you what, here's what we are going to do.
You make the blanket.
Get the yard on sale.
On sale only. When it's completed, I will pay you. But when it's completed, I'll give
you 70 bucks, which is more than generous. No, you pay me 200 bucks up front and 200 a pun completion, then you pay shipping. Why the F do I pay half up front?
Huh? Because if you back out, I'm not 160 bucks in the whole on yarn. No, you're going
to buy the yarn on sale. Of course I'm going to buy the yarn on sale, but I'm still going to charge you full price.
You're insane! I gave you a really generous offer. I'm going to report you. I'll make sure
everyone knows of your scam. You are charging way too much. Way too much. Oh no, nobody will ever ask me to do a commission again.
Don't do that, I'm begging you.
You're going to be going out of business.
Oh my gosh.
Oh no, whatever will we do now.
You don't believe me?
Oh no, I do.
I just don't care.
F you, I will destroy your business.
Look at all the F's I don't give.
Dude, I don't have a business.
I'm an F'ing flight instructor.
Crochet is just my hobby.
I take commissions on occasion,
but I don't do crochet for an income. I don't
even really want commissions that much. So if you want to ding blink it, then that's what
I'm charging. F you. Then you should do it for free. You don't need the money. Tell
you what, I'll do it for 800 bucks. Who is this guy gonna report OP2?
Like there's some national regulating body of crocheters, and their crocheters guild is
gonna find this guy for not setting reasonable crochet prices?
What on earth?
Our next Reddit post is from MyZitWazad.
Hey mate, you're a boiler maker, right?
Yes, I am. Who is this?
I'm a friend of Sam's. He said you're a boiler maker.
Oh, okay. Well, yes, I am.
I got this job that needs welding. Think you can do it.
Uh, not sure. We don't really do foreign orders at my work.
I'm not foreign?
Yeah.
Yeah, I mean like outside jobs.
You did Sam's job.
Yes, but I did it outside of work hours.
So can you do mine outside of work hours?
What's the job for?
I need a trailer made.
I don't really know, but I'll see what I can do.
Have you got material?
If not, have a look at this URL.
I can help you with ordering.
Why do I need to supply material?
So I can do your job?
You did Sam's for free.
Yes, but he supplied material.
Well, I don't want to buy metal. Sam's for free. Yes, but he supplied material.
Well, I don't want to buy metal.
Well, I can't help you, sorry.
You did Sam's for free, though.
Yes, again, he supplied material.
Can't you just take it from your work?
You probably got heaps.
No, I don't want to steal from my work. Just help me out. I really need this done.
I'm sorry, but I can't steal from my work. We order what we need for jobs and don't have much spare.
Okay then, F you, you grunk. You're probably garbage anyway. Cowboy smiley face emoji.
F off grunt. Get...
F'd. I make more in a day than you do in a week.
Then just buy a trailer with all your extra money.
F off. Blocked.
Okay, I've got to ask, what on earth is a grog?
I've never heard that word before in my life.
I'm guessing this is an Australian term because the guy used the term heaps and I've noticed
Australian who's the word heaps a lot.
So is this Australian slang?
What does it mean?
I really hope that grog isn't some like ultra-racial slur
in Australia and I just got in my video band in that entire country. Anyways, if you know
what that word means please let me know down in the comments.
That was our Slash Choosing Beggars and if you liked my channel please hit that subscribe
button and check out my merch store with the link down in the description.
subscribe button and check out my merch store with the link down in the description.