rSlash - r/Maliciouscompliance I Watched As My Boss Chopped His Fingers Off!
Episode Date: May 9, 2020r/Maliciouscompliance OP works at a sandwich restaurant, and one of his responsibilities is to clean the meat slicer. He does cleans it the safe way (which is the correct way). When OP's boss watches ...him clean the slider, he decides that OP is doing it incorrectly and wants to show him the "correct" way to clean it. OP warns his boss that cleaning it differently is very dangerous, but the boss ignores him and ends up cutting off his finger! If you like this podcast, subscribe for more daily Reddit podcasts! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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You're flying to meet with a new supplier to keep your business growing.
And with the business platinum card from American Express,
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Welcome to our slash malicious compliance where your wish is my command.
Years back, I drove a truck and delivered furniture. My helper and I got along
great and we worked very well together. The warehouse manager was kind of a
douchebag that really got off on
the power trip. He was always so serious, like he believed that you couldn't have fun at work.
He instituted a two hour window policy for deliveries. I'm sure most of you are familiar with this now,
but it was new to the company. He would create a route for us, time everything in his head, and create
a schedule. He would then call the customers and let them know what two hours we would be expected at their house. The first day the policy was in place, my partner
and I kicked butt. We got some we were ahead of our window, so I called the next customer
and asked if they minded if we came early. The customer was very happy that they didn't
have to wait. I did that for the rest of the deliveries that day. We ended up back to
the warehouse before our last delivery was even scheduled. Did we get a... Great job!
Did we hear?
Maybe I messed up on the scheduling?
No, we hear.
You broke the rules by going to the customer's house before I said you could be there.
If it happens again, you'll get written up.
Okay.
We would start our day busting, but...
We would fly through deliveries until we reach
the time where we would just stop for an hour or two. I live in New Jersey, there's a lot
you can do. We went to our Cades, museums, the beach, all paid time because we wouldn't
want to break the rules and get written up. Down in the comments, Barzi sums this up quite
well. The customer is always right, Unless they're contradicting a middle manager with a control fetish.
Our next reddit posted from Tina Webb Mom.
I'm a nurse.
I work in nursing homes, rehabs, old folks homes, etc.
I do the paperwork that's in to Medicare.
That paperwork has to be submitted in a timely manner or the facility goes from 700 bucks
a day to 200 bucks a day.
Just tossing numbers out, don't remember the amount.
This is important in a second.
I worked for a facility that I loved.
The people were wonderful.
It was like a huge family.
The staff ate their meal with patients,
the independent people visited often,
and our bosses were easy to approach.
Then, the boss is retired, at the same time.
Our board then decided that maybe we would make more money if we hired a management company.
All of these changes happened within weeks of each other.
They hired a traveling nurse to hit up the skilled nursing unit for a year.
We didn't react well to her.
She never smiled, she would just look at you if you asked a question and she decided
that new roles that didn't apply to her were needed.
Shortly after her hiring, she began firing everybody.
It was like a war zone had erupted on the floor.
Nobody smiled, no laughter, no visitors,
no family meals and loads of stress.
I was the last one fired.
Oh, I'd been written up, zero write-ups before she came in.
For things like having a cell phone on the floor,
it was in my pocket.
Having a drink on my desk in my office, it was water, and filling a certification form
late.
The doctor signed it the day it was due, but they photocopied it before I had left
from the doctor's office.
So they had their three write-ups.
At 3 p.m. on Friday, the administrator calls me into his office.
I'm informed that I've been terminated.
I'm floored.
I work my butt off. I'm actually great I've been terminated. I'm floored. I work my butt off.
I'm actually great at my job.
I've been there seven years.
I'm escorted to my office to gather my stuff.
They turned off my computer, asked for the passwords, and escorted me from the building.
Here's where the malicious compliance comes in.
They called me into fire me, just as I was creating the packet to send a Medicare.
I was never able to send it. They never asked if things were situated since it was Friday.
I volunteered no information. Remember that timely manner? Well, that Friday was the
very last day to submit about 30 different forms. Most were 14-day assessments that literally
covered 14 days.
My friend and billing called me to let me know that the default cost them over $100,000
by the time they figured everything out.
Our next Reddit post is from Topus Throwaway.
I'm transgender, male to female, 23 years old, and I was born and raised in Tennessee,
and they're not so LGBT friendly.
Neither are my neighbors.
Tennessee refuses to let me change my gender.
It sucks, maybe one day I'll move somewhere else.
I don't know if that'll let me change it
since I have a Tennessee birth certificate,
but that's a question for another time.
Tennessee also has laws prohibiting women
from going topless.
Now, first off, I will not post pictures for science.
Second off, I definitely have boobs.
For all intents and purposes, when I go out jogging, I pass as a woman.
Someone recently added me to my neighbors, and they've replied with several nasty letters
and other such stuff.
Calling me a gay man and other bigoted garbage.
So my revenge was to jog around the neighborhood, topless.
I don't see the problem, they're calling me a man, the state is calling me a man, walking
around topless is allowed for men.
But see, I win, because now they've called the cops saying a woman is running around
topless in their neighborhood.
Oh god, it covered the children's eyes, boobs are eeeple.
Suddenly I'm a woman.
Nice logic you got there.
And then I got a call from the cops and they wanted to talk to me.
As I was so well informed due to better call Saul and the top of all time patron legal
advice, I told him I was busy and I hung up.
I later got another call and didn't answer.
This whole thing was kind of obnoxious.
I prefer a sports brought a hold them in place.
In the end I talked to a lawyer who thought it was hysterical, and we talked to the cops
who also thought it was hysterical, and we all agreed I wouldn't do it again.
Apparently it technically is against the law somehow, though my lawyer said he was sure
the charges would be dropped.
I decided not to fight it, because honestly I didn't want to end up being held in a
min's prison. A couple of my neighbors actually got my points, because honestly, I didn't want to end up being held in a min's prison.
A couple of my neighbors actually got my points, surprisingly, and I've made a couple of
friends.
Our next Reddit post is from a Dimneyon.
So quick background.
I work for a big national company, which I will not name because I like being employed.
And we have a big software system that the entire company relies on to wrap stuff up
and get it ready for the client.
It's that last choke point bottleneck where, if it dies, literally all the work the rest of
the company does is for not. I run the system at the Grunt Work Day to Day operational level.
This system also typically has upgrades and fixes installed about every two weeks,
and they usually wait until late night on Friday to bring it down and do the install so that it
doesn't impact daily business. Now, when these installs occurred, they always get a bunch of people on a call to go through
everything and make sure it all works before calling it good for Monday.
Being the guy who runs the system all the time, I was always required to be on these calls.
I hated them.
The call started at 10pm friday night so I couldn't go out and enjoy my weekend.
They'd last about 2 hours while the developers installed stuff, and at the very end, I pushed
one button to kick things off so the suits could see that I was working and everyone was
happy.
This was literally monkey work, and everyone on those calls could have done it.
I volunteered to teach them how, but no, they wanted me on the call.
I was salary at the time, so not exactly like I could say no, and I wasn't getting paid
anything extra for it. Can you see where this is going? Okay, so a few years ago, guidelines
changed at the government level, saying anyone who made a certain amount per year or
less couldn't be denied a salary. They had to be hourly, to stop companies from abusing
glorified part-time workers. I made more than that, but the company went overboard because
I was somewhere in the general ballpark, and they didn't want to risk it, so bam, I'm a more than that, but the company went overboard because I was somewhere in the general ballpark and they didn't want to risk it, so bam, I'm now hourly.
Roughly two weeks later, it's deployment call time.
I ask if I'm really required to be there or not, and Boss Man says yes.
I don't complain because at least now I get paid for it.
Oh, but wait, this isn't any normal deployment.
No, this is a big one.
They tell me I need to be on the calls that will start at 5,
right as I'd normally be clocking out for the day.
Thinking it would be a quick check-in and then back out until 10,
I do defle call in.
Nope, this call lasts from 5 until 10
when we got to take all of a 5 minute break
and then get onto another call.
Now, I'm home shards, so I'm sitting on this call in my underwear and nothing going on requires
any input from me at all.
Again, I'm not complaining because I'm getting paid for this and I've got Netflix on in
the background.
Not only am I getting paid, since I did my full 40 hours that week already, this was
over time.
So you think you know sports?
Point's bet is the sportsbook for you, because we've got the features for true competitors. This was over time. could take your winnings to play live blackjack on the same point spent at the platform that gives you everything you need. You know what to do. Bet on it. Point spent sportsbook
and casino.
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So 10 o'clock deployment stuff starts going on and by midnight we get to my part.
I push the button. I tell them it's going to take about 20 to 30 minutes to process
before we know if it worked. A half hour of twiddling my thumbs later, it fails.
There's some cursing from the desertks they go to try to fix whatever
board, and I got to spend another 30 minutes resetting all the data so we can try again.
Once everything is ready, I push the button. 30 minutes later, it fails again.
Fast forward several hours, it's now 5 am Saturday morning. It still hasn't run properly.
Everybody's cranky, except me, because baby, I got dollar signs in my eyes.
12 hours of overtime for watching Netflix and doing monkey work is gonna be sweet.
Except it was even better than I thought at the time.
That Saturday was technically some minor holiday.
My company based time and a half if you work on a holiday.
So I had 7 hours of overtime and 5 hours of overtime with additional time and a half.
I ended up making over half a week's pay overnight from that call.
My boss flipped when he saw the check I was supposed to get.
I reminded him that I had asked an email with half the team copied if he really needed me on that call.
And that he said I absolutely had to be.
Unlike most of the bosses I read about on here, he swallowed his defeat gracefully.
I got a huge paycheck that period, and oddly enough, I've not been required to attend
a single one of those calls since then.
Huh, I wonder why.
Our next Reddit post is from Medusa.
I'm a radiology resident and luckily the
facility I'm working on allows for each resident to be separated in individual workstation rooms
for reading imaging. This morning I grabbed one of the rooms and spent a while cleaning it all up
to make it safe for me to spend the day in. Another resident who showed up late came in the door
and demanded that I leave the room because it was a sign to him. I chose the room because I knew
the dictation
microphone didn't work so all reports would have to be typed and I was on a
rotation that was light on volume so it wasn't a big deal to type the reports
for me. He started to squeeze his way in and box me out and because of his
persistence I let him. I packed all my things to head to a different room, got up
and hit it out the door. Right before shutting the door I told him, oh, by the way, the Dictaphone doesn't work in this room.
As I sit here typing this, I'm watching him read Case After Case, which he has to
individually type. Meanwhile, I've spent the day studying and relaxing in my new, cleaned
room. Man, you'd assume that someone smart enough to be a resident at
a hospital wouldn't also be so stupid. Our next Reddit post is from Dumbledie. I used
to work part-time at a sandwich shop during college about 9 to 10 years ago. The shop
had a high turnover rate, and I was there the longest, so I basically learned everything
in the store. One day, we had a health inspector come in to evaluate the food safety, temperature
readings, food storage, etc.
I had to slice the tomatoes for night shift, and the inspector took issues with the dirty slicer, and asked if it had been cleaned first.
I said yes. He asked if I used the scrub thingy. I forget what it's called. It's like a wire scrub on a stick.
I said no, you don't put your fingers near the blades. You just spray it off and dunk it in sanitizer.
He chastised me
so I was like, okay, show me how to clean it properly then. If there was a way to do
it right without getting hurt, then I was willing to learn.
My coworker and I stood there and watched him jam the wire scrub between the blades
and pull it back. And of course, it got stuck. He shoved it forward again, jamming his knuckles into the blades.
He started bleeding everywhere.
My coworker had to shut himself in the walk-in freezer.
He was laughing his butt off.
I just looked at my manager trying to help this
80 inspector get a towel and whatnot and said,
yeah, I'm not changing the slicer like that.
Excuse me, sir.
Yes, there seems to be an idiot's finger in my sandwich.
Our next Reddit post is from Diba.
Context, this happened a few years ago.
I was 18 and working as a receptionist
for community nursing service.
As the youngest in the team by a long shot,
the average age of employees being around 55 to 60.
I was usually the one responsible
for the computer stuff. Mostly just simple
things. Nothing I could Google couldn't solve. The other staff members were wonderful,
and I learned a lot from working with them. Except for the assistant manager, Karen.
This woman was the Bane of my existence. She was over 75 years old. Recently came out
of a 15 year retirement as a receptionist and was armed
with a certificate in business management from a 4 hour online course. She refused to
use basic computer skills such as word or email stating that she didn't need to learn
them again when she had others to do it for. Namely me.
In a 5 hour shift, I would spend 3 hours just fielding her tasks. Needless to say, this came
along with all the fun personality traits that make a manager from hell.
Delicious compliance. At the start of my shift, I received an email from Karen asking me
to print the attached files. One was at PDF, and the other on MP4. So, assuming she just
meant the PDF, I take the printed copy to her. This is roughly how
the exchange went. Why do you only have one file? I send two. You want me to print an
MP4? Isn't that what I asked? A monkey could do your job and probably better at that. Here,
I'm pretty sure she laughed at her own joke. Look, I don't think you understand.
Don't try and teach me.
Don't forget I did your job for 20 years and now I could have you fired.
Already over it and ready for some malicious compliance.
Okay, well I've never printed this type of file before so it might take a while.
I don't care how long it takes, I'm your boss and I've told you to do this.
Once it's done, you can move on to the other jobs.
I'm grinning ear to ear at this point.
I get back to my desk and send her an email summarizing our conversation and explicitly
clarifying she wanted me to print an MP4.
To which I got a snarky reply.
Perfect.
I spent the next 4-5 hours pausing the video every 2-3 frames,
screenshotting it, pasting it into a word document and printing. The administrative tasks piled
up. Not that Carrie noticed because she mostly spent her time reading magazines and talking
on the phone. I felt bad as this placed an extra load on the other receptionists. However,
since Karen was universally hated, they gave me their blessings.
Once complete, I took about 100 pages carefully held with clips to her desk and sweetly told
her that I'd printed the other file.
She looked smug until she saw what was in front of her.
Page after page of almost the same picture as the man moves to the video, some slightly
blurry, all in full color. She was furious to say the least, but I was one hour over time
on my shift and Karen knew that would already cause her some issues, so she let me leave.
Though I knew it wasn't over yet. As expected, I get called into HR for a meeting the following
week, where they accuse me of wasting company times and not complying with management. I explained the situation in detail and showed them the email,
including her awful reply. I also showed them a few more emails and texts where Karen had some
particularly descriptive words to insult our staff members, including the very HR rep taking my
interview. Turns out, this was a straw that broke the
camel's back as Karen had multiple reports against her from other staff members
and she had been driving HR insane with her own complaints. She lost her job
the following week. The best part is that this happened on a Sunday where I got
double pay. I took some of that sweet over-time cash and brought in cupcakes
to work once Karen was gone.
I said it was an end of week-treat, but we all knew what we were celebrating.
The HR rep seemed to particularly enjoy hers.
Well, maybe this Karen wasn't a complete idiot.
Maybe she's just a Harry Potter fan and thinks that pictures can move on paper.
That was our slash malicious compliance, and if you enjoyed this podcast, then please
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