rSlash - r/Maliciouscompliance Karen Yelled at Me, So I Towed Her Car 😂

Episode Date: October 7, 2021

r/Maliciouscompliance In today's episode, OP works as a security guard at a large facility. He notices a Karen park her car in a reserved space, and then sneak in through a back door without paying for her ticket! OP doesn't really care about the stolen ticket, but he approaches her to get her to move her car. She assumes that he's there about the stolen ticket, so she quickly shuts OP down. OP just shrugs, walks off, and tows the Karen's car! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best post from across Reddit. Today's subreddit is R-Slash malicious compliance, where a thieving caring gets her car toad. Our next Reddit post is from Vigilin and Fidel. I work security for a private business campus that has venues that are often rented by outside groups. One particularly large hall was rented by a local church group, and we sold our tickets at the box office immediately in front of the venue. Without going into boring detail, there was only one way into the hall for the general public, but there were numerous exits with cameras everywhere. Parking is free in all three of our parking decks, except in clearly marked reserve spaces, which will be important soon.

While visitors were arriving for the event, we got a call from a tenant complaining that a car was parked in one of their 24-7 reserve spaces and they needed moved ASAP. This client pays for those parking spaces and they're constantly using them at all hours of the day, even on weekends. That's why we have multiple highly visible signs for these parking spaces that warns people that we enforce towing. We reviewed the camera footage and we saw the owner of the car was a woman dressed in fine Sunday clothes that were an almost painful shade of lime green with a matching hat. This would have been enough information to identify her in our large hall, but we then

noticed that she bypassed the ticket line and made her way to one of the exit doors. She stayed there for several minutes and when one of the cleaning staff exited, she slipped in behind them. As a supervisor on duty, I entered the hall and found her in one of the front rows, sitting in a group of people. She saw me coming in my security uniform, and immediately scrunched up her face. Ma'am, can I- I just sat down. What do you want? She was already being defensive and loud, which is not a sign of innocence in my experience. I'm with campus security and I need to ask,

what you need to do is leave me alone. I am sitting with my family and we're here to enjoy my nephew's concert. There ain't nothing so important that you rena-copped need to be bothering me like this. Actually, it is important. If you wouldn't mind coming with me, we can talk in the aisle and... No, you are NOT kicking me out of here at my own nephews church concert.

And with that, she started avoiding eye contact with me. I should point out that she thinks I'm here because she didn't buy a ticket, but I don't care about that. I'm trying to tell her to move her car before we tow it because this is her only chance to move it herself. I said, ma'am, I'm not here about how you got inside the hall. I'm... I don't know what you're talking about, but you need to leave me the hell alone. At this point, it was so comical that I remember getting the biggest smile on my face and telling her, that's all I need to hear. Enjoy your show.

I left the hall and I had her car towed immediately. Two hours later, she reported that her car was still into our security desk. The desk officer informed her that she parked in a reserve spot and the security had tried to make contact with her before the show began, according to our log. She loudly demanded to speak to whoever was in charge, and that's when I came around the corner to introduce myself. The look on her face

was priceless, and she didn't say another word as I gave her the information about the tow company, which was closed by then. OP, what you should have done was refuse to tell her what tow company you guys use until she paid you for the hall ticket. Our next reddit post is from Yetchi. This isn't my malicious compliance, it's my dad's. My father started working for a manufacturing company in North Carolina starting in 1983. He moved from being a general floor worker up to a maintenance position after going to college in the late 80s, and he's now moved up to a salary senior technician for the entire plant. When he first started with the company, they provided a lot of benefits, dental, vision, health, 401k and paid vacations. Most of these are no longer offered, but because of his

time on the job, he still receives health and vacation time. Our family used to go on vacations every year, but after my parents divorced, we stopped doing that and my father worked year-round. After he became salaried, his hours changed to weekends and holidays, so the bulk of his work week was only 24-32 hours in total. The company recently announced the end of paid vacations for all employees, including the legacy ones, which is where his malicious compliance comes in. Every year, my dad would request time off

for Christmas and New Year's and he would be told no, put the time in his bank, which he would do tofully do. Now, with the end of paid vacations, he's emptying out his time bank of 240 hours paid per year for 30 years. He's not going to work for six years,

just in time for him to retire at the age of 68. Also OP clarifies that one of the reasons why he's able to pull this off is because he doesn't work a full 40 hour work week. He actually only works 24 hours a week, so all those banked hours will go way farther than normal. Our next reddit post is from hockey fan. So about 2 years ago, I was working as an assistant manager at a small business with about 20 to 25 employees overall. I had been there for about five and a half years, with three of those years at an entry level position. And then as the business grew,

the manager was getting overwhelmed, so they created the assistant manager position to put me in it. Now, I was their jack of all trades, covering multiple positions when needed. I built and maintained their new website. I served as the entire IT department. I got a new phone system installed. I replaced a major critical piece of equipment, IDI-wide minor building updates. I did inventory management,

distributed relationships, and more. Well, owner number one was fed up with owner number two's BS. Owner number one was the responsible one and knew what was going on while owner number 2 was just along for the ride. Owner number 1 said, either sell me your half or buy my half. Well owner number 2 ended up buying the entire company. A few staff quit because of that while the rest of us braced for the coming disaster while

we figured out what to do next. He also told me to tell the staff that they should no longer bring their concerns to me, but instead bring them to the new manager. The response she gave me was, I don't care about staff concerns, they are replaceable anyways. The new manager was someone that she'd freshly hired who had only been there two weeks and no one trusted her yet. Well, I went home that night, shared the entire conversation with most of the staff, and typed up trusted her yet. Well, I went home that night, shared the entire conversation with most of the staff, and typed up my two weeks notice, and I turned it in the next morning. The fallout. So, in addition to losing me and everything I normally did, another

three to four people quit over the next month, leaving the owner overall with about 50% of the normal staff. The website hasn't been touched since I left, and the old owner still has outdated information up. I've gotten multiple questions about where something was or how to do something because no one else knows how to run certain things. I know the company has been losing clients because our products have been getting worse. Overall, I would give her a couple of years before she has to either sell the business or close down because I can't imagine it going well for her.

Well boss, it's what you ask for. If you treat your employees like they're replaceable, then you'll have to replace them. It's really that simple. I cannot understand why companies don't just pay their employees what they're worth, because like if your employees leave, then your business doesn't work, and then the amount of money that you're losing from your failed business is greater than the amount of money that you're losing from paying your employees what they're worth. It doesn't make any sense.

Our next Reddit post is from Caros Snoopy. So I was granted a legal name change a few months ago. It's a long boring story as to why. Simply put, I hated the unique spelling of my first name and I wanted to ditch my surname. I didn't have much trouble updating my name in most places. Social Security, driver's license, insurance, yada yada. There were no bumps in the road until I got to the very last thing to update. My credit card. I use this particular credit card a lot. I'm self-employed and I use this card to rack up travel points for flights, hotels,

rental cards, etc. However, if you've ever checked into a hotel or picked up a rental car, you'll know the name on the card must match the name on the ID. So I call the credit card company, and I'm told that I have to fill out a certain document and mail that in alongside a copy of a court document. Fair enough. Two weeks go by, and I hear nothing, so I call again. They say they haven't received my documents. I am then informed they have a

fax number that I can use to send in the documentation. So I fax in all the necessary documents using an app on my phone. Another two weeks go by. Still nothing. I call again, and I get the same spiel on the other end of the phone. Please mail airfags, blah blah blah, you get the picture. I once again did what they asked, and another week passes. I call again, and I'm given the same fricking script. I'm starting to get annoyed by this point. I have an upcoming trip planned, and I need the card to match my ID. I ask to speak to a manager, and they give me some BS about the manager not currently being available. So anyways, I once again faxed in the document in the court order. However, this time, I decided that I was just going to keep hitting send every single time

the previous one had shown up as delivered. I thought that I'd repeat this process a few times just to make sure they got it. After sending this document 25 times the first day, I got no response. The next day I was sitting on my couch watching football. I thought I'd send the facts a few more times. By the time I realized how many times I'd hit send, I'd sent it over 130 times. The very next afternoon, I got a call from a manager at the credit card company. She sounded quite angry over the phone, but I just played dumb. You guys asked me to fax it in, so I faxed it in. I got my updated card in the mail 3 days later. Okay, so this reminds me of a story for my life, and I genuinely don't know if

this story is going to be remotely entertaining, but I'm going to share it because it reminds me of the story. Okay, so there's a couple of things you need to know about me for this story. First off, I really, really hate anything that's like tedious and time consuming and boring, so like obviously everyone hates tedious stuff. Right, it's tedious stuff is boring, that's just kind of how it is. But my tolerance level for that type of work is really, really low and I get frustrated super easily by it. Secondly, which is kind of like the first thing, I really hate filling out online forms because it's like, okay, look, it's a cute picture of a cat and then you click on the picture of the cat.

And then it's like, sign up for our website. What's your address? What's your mother's maiden name? How many pubic ears do you know? It's like, website, come on, why do you need to know all this stupid information? Why do I need to sign up for this account? Just let me look at the picture of the cat. So a lot of times when I'm filling out online forms, I get really frustrated and angry and bored and as a result I don't fill out the forms correctly. Okay, so my brother really likes Final Fantasy 14 and I like Final Fantasy 14 like a moderate amount. Years ago my brother and I played Final Fantasy 14 together, so I signed up for an account I went through that whole tedious process of signing up and I linked my credit card and I downloaded the game and I played with my brother for a couple of months and then I got kind of bored of it and I stopped.

So fast forward a few years later, my brother was kind of missing the game and he was like, hey, Dabney, will you play this game with me because I kind of want to boot it up again and play some more. And I said, yeah, sure, I'm not really super into it but I guess I could play for a bit. Sure, let's do it. So I go to log into my old Final Fantasy account and I've completely forgotten my login information and I go to reset my password.

And I can't remember the infinite loop that I was in, but I got caught in some sort of red tape, infinite loop that I couldn't escape. I think it was that every time I tried to reset the password, it's into verification code. But the verification code was sent to like, an old phone that I didn't have anymore. So to get the verification code,

I had to change my phone number that was associated with the account. But I couldn't log in to change my phone number that was associated with the account. So I was trapped and I couldn't log in. And I spent like an hour just Fumbling through their website trying to find like please let me escape. It's like door mamu I've come to change my password door mamu. I've come to change my password and they just wouldn't let me change my password because It's an infinite torture time loop and you can tell just for me telling the story how frustrated I was getting

I was getting really pissed off at this website So my brother's like hey are, are we playing Final Fantasy? And I said, no, I can't figure out what my login is and I explain the situation. And of course, he knows how frustrated I get by this stuff. So he's like, okay, calm down. I got this. I don't mind helping you because keep in mind

he's really, really motivated to play Final Fantasy 14. So he's like, I got your back. I will call up this company and I will like pretend to be you and you just be on discord with me. That way I can hear you on discord and I'll be on the phone with a guy and you can give me, you know, information like your credit card number or whatever. And that way I'll deal with like all the bureaucracy and red tape for you, but you can still give me the information. And I said, okay, great. That sounds like a great compromise. Let's do it. So, my brother calls up this service rep

at the Final Fantasy Company. And he's on a phone call with me on Discord so I can hear him talking to the guy who's on speaker phone, but the guy on the phone can't hear me. Only my brother can hear me. And the guy's like, okay, Mr. Dad, let's just verify your account, what your name, what your address, blah, blah, blah.

And as he's asking the questions, I'm of course telling this information to my brother and my brother is relaying it. Okay, so the problem is the guy's like, the guy's like, okay, what's your address? And I tell my brother and my address, one, two, three main street, whatever. And my brother relays the information and the guy's like, no, that's incorrect.

And some like, huh. Okay, let me try my previous address. And my brother relays it. Okay, that doesn't work. What's my previous address? And my brother relays that as well. So we've gone through like three or four different addresses of places where I'd lived. And none of them were working.

So my brother is like, man, what's the deal? Like I'm trying really hard to give you the addresses, but... But it's not working, so I don't understand why. Could you like help me out here? Like I'm really confused. And the guy's like, um, well, let's just say it's not a typical address. And at this point, I'm like, aha, I know what happened. Previous Dabney from like five years ago got pissed off about how complicated and convoluted

signing up for this website was. So he got really angry at the website and he didn't fill out the form correctly. So I told my brother to try out one, two, three fake street because that's the address that I usually use when I sign up for websites that I'm pissed off at So my brother's like, okay, gosh, I'm so stupid try one two three fake street and the guy's like no, I'm afraid that's not it either and so I'm like And so at this point I'm lost like what could it be? What could I put in because one two, fake street is my go-to. And then I remembered, this isn't just any website that I'm signing up to.

This is the Dormammu Infinite Time Prison Hellscape that is Square Enix, the owner of Final Fantasy 14. So I would have been extra frustrated. What would super, super frustrated, dad and you write? Okay, I got it. For the street, try one, two, three, f**, I got it. For the street try one two three You street for the town try

You for the state try you and for the country try you and And my brother relayed the information and the guy was like yep, that's it And I got my account recovered and so the funny thing about this is, while this was going on, my brother is absolutely cracking up in tears because this is just such a like me thing to do and he's struggling to relate this information as he's giggling and crying laughing. And he's mocking while he's doing it. He's like, oh my God, I'm such an idiot.

I can't believe I'm so stupid to do this. And the phone is like, Yeah, well, I mean, I guess you were having a rough day. So anyways, that's the story of how I finally recovered my password on Final Fantasy 14. And the ironic thing is at the end of- Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha And look, I was like, yeah, it was f*** you final fantasy 14. That was our slash malicious compliance. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.