rSlash - r/Maliciouscompliance My Ex Sued Me and Lost Everything!
Episode Date: February 24, 2023https://www.youtube.com/rslash Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices...
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Welcome to our Slash Malicious Compliance, where a greedy ex-wife ends up screwing herself
over.
Our next Reddit post is from the end.
Background.
My ex and I were three months into separation.
I kept suggesting divorce agreements, trying to find out what she
would accept other than taking her back and return to being a doormat for her. I have a good
head for legal documents, and understood very early that as much as I would prefer to just burn
everything down and disappear, legally it was very likely that I was going to be paying alimony,
and that she was entitled to a fair share of everything.
But in a no-fault state with no gender preferences, it did mean a fair share.
That meant that legally, our divorce settlement wouldn't be heavily biased in her favor.
So, I kept trying to work with her and try to figure out how we could divide our assets.
I did this every day for months! She would object to anything that put any responsibility
on her, anything that left something of value out of her hands. Anytime I asked her what term she
would be okay with, she would just de-real the conversation to something else. Not long into this,
I realized that I would need a paper trail, so I switched to email only. Throughout all of this,
I had also recognized that a court would order spousal support,
so there wasn't any point in just cutting her off financially.
I wasn't a total dormat at this point though.
I had moved my direct deposit to a solo account and kept up with her weekly cash flow, and
I kept paying the bills.
But my final offer during this period was the heavily unfair offer of splitting
the cars one to each of us, me taking on all the debt, including her student loans, me
paying her like 3-4 thousand dollars a month for a year so that she could get her feet
under her, and she gets all of our stuff. I walk away with my car, my dog, some tools,
and some clothes. Still, this is a no-go, it's not good enough for her.
And so, we get to the meat of the story for this malicious compliance.
Three months in, I finally get her to agree to a mediator since I'm getting nowhere.
She shows up to the initial meeting, the first time we've seen each other in a while,
the second time since splitting. She had been staying with her sister. The mediator starts out with the
rules of mediation and the agreements to sign. I sign easily, she box, but signs it finally.
One of the relevant terms is that we agree to not file any other legal paperwork. We would
come to an agreement, and the mediator would file the final court papers on both of our perhaps to get the divorce ordered. The mediator starts asking basic questions,
and every question to either of us results in my acts launching into an irrelevant topic
attempting emotional manipulation of me or him. I just ignore her and direct my interactions
to the mediator. The peak was when she literally crawled on top of the big table to stick her face in
mind to force me to see her and engage in her ranting.
The mediator called it quits at that point.
He reminded her of the rules that she agreed to, gave us homework to fill out and had
a schedule the next meeting with his clerk two weeks out.
Three days later, I got served with a summons to court
for a hearing over spousal support.
The summons shows the claim my ex made
that all she had received from me in three months
was $130.
Oh man, that wasn't true at all.
Not to mention she violated the mediator's terms.
I end up on a conference call with my ex and the mediator,
and the mediator tells her that she needs to withdraw the complaint
or mediation can't continue.
She adamantly insists that she knows her rights.
So, the mediator ends his involvement, cuts as refund checks,
minus time works so far, and ex at stage left.
I prepare for the court hearing.
I print out three months of bank statements
and highlight every transfer to her. Every bill paid on her behalf. Every ATM withdrawal by her
card. Also, over 100 toll bills that I received from her just driving through the express lane
tolls, so I get the elevated license plate female to me. Allogether, it was $13,000 and change.
I thought to myself, you missed a couple of zeros in your complaint.
My final stack of paper was rather thick, so I printed out an Excel spreadsheet summary
to use as a cover sheet.
I also looked up the Spousal Support Rules again.
Basically, you take the higher person's income and subtract the lower person's income. Then, the person who makes more money has to pay 40% of that difference to the other
person. There's a little wiggle room, but that's it. Simple. She was currently getting
up to 72% of my pay once you factored in her bills. This court hearing was a good thing.
It wasn't as good as a mediator and having a fast resolution,
but I wasn't likely to end up getting screwed here. Not to mention, I had daydreams of
her finding out what lying on court documents might do. The court date rolls around. I show
up to court, waiting in the hall outside the family law section. She shows up, plops
herself next to me, and starts going off on me again. I try to ignore her.
Then, to keep from engaging, I start a written transcript of her ranting using the back cover of my paperwork folder.
Finally, she realized what I'm doing and ends the rant with.
Oh, I guess you're writing what I'm saying so you can make your friends hate me.
Trust me, they need no encouragement.
She huffs,
sits a few seats away, and is quiet the rest of the time that we waited. The court officer
finally comes to get us and we head in. The officer starts giving the legal speeches
and then asks my ex if she has anything to add to the complaint. She launches into a roller
coaster speech proclaiming all of my bad faults, how mean I was to try
to divorce her and how I obviously didn't need any of the money I made because he's
just going to live somewhere simple and cheap anyways.
Yeah, her words.
Once my ex is done ranting, the court officer asks me if I have anything I'd like to add.
The court officer sees my stack of paper and eyeballs it as she's talking.
I hand over the stack of papers, tell the officer that the summary sheet on top should help clear up the financial points in question,
and just verbally start going through all the items.
At each one, my ex interrupts to give a reason why that item shouldn't count.
Every single time, the officer keeps asking her to stop interrupting, but to no avail.
We finally finish the list. The officer is shaking her head slightly and says,
Mr. OP, this court process is to ensure that both parties are doing the right thing.
So all of this, she says, gesturing to my stack of papers, needs to stop right now.
We will garnish your paychecks for the amount specified by law and send that to her instead.
I know that this is a win.
I knew that it was going to be, but she didn't.
She sat there all smug as we got into the calculations.
I know that she was thrilled at the idea of getting a quart check directly.
It sure would show me.
Everything wrapped up, we got the totals, signed the papers, and I handed over a check
for the first payment, and the officer got up to make copies of everything.
I asked the officer if I could wait in another room while she got the copies, and she agreed
while giving my ex a bit of a side eye.
I got my paperwork first, with the officer saying,
It might take a few minutes for her to get her paperwork, but you're free to go.
I got the hint and left immediately. I got in my car and immediately called my cell
carrier and canceled her phone. They asked me, does she want to set up her own plan?
I can't answer that. I'm obeying a court order to remove her from my accounts.
Okay, they said, then I just worked down the remaining subscriptions that I was paying for Then I can't answer that. I'm obeying a court order to remove her from my accounts.
Okay, they said.
Then I just worked down the remaining subscriptions that I was paying for that she used.
I even had all the bills in front of me from the court documents with the account numbers
and customer service numbers right there.
I was done in driving home when she started blowing up my phone with incoming emails
demanding to know what I was doing.
Then text from her sister's phone.
Then calls.
I just grinned and didn't answer any of them.
She stopped after an hour or so and gave me a few hours of silence.
Then, I got an all-caps email with a screenshot of the Netflix in active account message.
Oh my god, even Netflix?
I admit it, I giggled. The fallout
wasn't over though. A month later, after she realized how much less money she got from
me after winning her case, she filed an appeal. It was denied due to a lack of a reason.
A month later, she filed a complaint that I wasn't paying her car payment. This was just
an excuse to get into court. I had been paying it, and I was also pretty confident that even if I hadn't, she didn't know how to
get into that loan's account. She legally could, she just never had cared to learn how. This time,
I had a lawyer and we both went to court. My ex was joining by phone. The officer paused before
calling my ex and tells my lawyer,
this lady is a piece of work. The validation of that statement will always remain with me.
The call goes predictably, my ex makes her relevant rants. The officer keeps shutting her down.
Finally, the court officer asked my ex for proof that I wasn't making my car payments,
while she's holding documents proving that I had been.
My ex nearly screams, I just know that he isn't so that he can hurt me."
The officer replies,
"...I'm holding proof that he has paid it and is satisfying his legal obligation.
This complaint is dismissed.
Thank you and hangs up on my ex."
Then down in the comments, we had this story from Captain Sanders.
My brother went through a breakup and made a generous offer to pay for his kid's upkeep.
His ex decided that wasn't enough, and insisted they take the legal route.
My brother happily agreed because he had already worked out what they would assess his payment to be.
Yup, they determined that he was overpaying.
She tried to backtrack, but once the courts determined what he should pay, that's what he had to be. Yup, they determined that he was overpaying. She tried to backtrack,
but once the courts determined what he should pay, that's what he had to pay. Then came
the divorce. My brother offers to give her the house free and clear as a home for his
kids, plus child support, and he would walk away with the remaining cash to set up his
new life. Again, this wasn't good enough for her and she insists they go to court. We found
out through a third party that she was boasting that she was going to take him to the cleaners.
She wanted the house, half the money, and child support, and she just knew the court would
rule for her. So they went to court. She even hired a lawyer to fight in her corner,
who apparently looked at my brother's proposal and told
the judge that he found it to be sensible and equitable. Strangely enough, the judge
agreed, so the ex got the house and no cash. The story doesn't end there. As part of
the settlement, they each had to declare all financial details to the court, and my brother
knew that she had a secret credit card with 15,000
pounds of debt that she didn't declare.
If she had declared it, then legally the debt would have been half his, but she kept it
quiet.
Why?
Embarrassment, we assumed.
So she'll get the house and no cash, but now she has this secret debt that she can't
pay off.
So she panics and starts saying that she wants to claim future earnings, pensions, inheritance,
etc.
My brother made her an offer of $15,000, but she had to sign away all future claims to
his money.
She snapped it up.
Two years later, my brother inherits 500,000 pounds.
She cannot claim a penny of it.
So, by assuming that my brother was trying to screw her, she screwed herself every step
of the way.
Our next Reddit post is from I Was The Chubby Lady.
This all happened about 18 years ago.
I was a waitress for a village inn.
I worked the morning shift because it had the most business.
Now this was back when smoking was still allowed in restaurants and we had a smoking section
and a non-smoking section. Our seating chart was designed for this in mind. Now on Sunday,
we had a wonderful church rush that would pack the entire place for hours, so Sunday was
totally non-smoking until 3pm. On the weekends we would have about 8 servers.
This meant the smoking side had 2 servers while the other side had 6.
So if you work the smoking side, you had 10 tables to take care of while the other servers
had 4.
Management knew that I was good at what I did, and would always put me in the biggest
section on Sunday, so I could take care of all 10 tables no problem.
Now servers always talk about their tips, and without fail, I always made more than biggest section on Sunday, so I could take care of all 10 tables no problem. Now, servers
always talk about their tips, and without fail, I always made more than anyone else.
This caused anger from some of the newer servers, and they said that it was because I always
got the better section. Management came to me and told me what was going on, and that's
when we decided on malicious compliance. Okay, you can have my section and next Sunday I'll take the small section.
But since I'm on the other side of the restaurant, I won't be able to help you much.
I then got to enjoy a less stressful Sunday, did my job like normal, turn my tables, and made a ton of money.
The other server was running around like crazy and not getting much done.
At the end of the shift, they learned they had made less money and tips in the week before
because of how bad they were taking care of their tables.
And the church crowd is horrible if you aren't taking care of them right.
It was always great to hear the new server say,
you can have your section back. I don't want it ever again.
This wasn't a one time thing either. This happened many times
over the five years I worked there. Every time it happened, I still made more money. Every time a
new server complained, I just smiled, said, go ahead and take my section. I could use a break.
Our next reddit post is from DioBean. I'm a 20-year-old male who works at a very popular restaurant
in a very snobby area.
My main job is to assist the servers in any way I can so they only have to worry about
sweet talking the customers.
I do all the heavy lifting for them and whether it's cleaning their tables or taking their
drinks and food to their tables, I'm doing it.
That way, all they have to focus on is making the customers laugh.
They get tips that range from 17 to $40 per table while
I make 8 bucks an hour and get treated poorly. My manager came up to me in a, I'm better
than you, mood, and told me to deep clean the floors, ice makers, walls, trash cans, and
racks, and to not come to the front for any reason. I'm very annoyed at this because
none of those things
are my job duties.
We have a staff that deals with all the cleaning of the back,
so it didn't make any sense to have me do it.
These tasks would have taken me an hour and a half max,
but I was feeling a bit cheeky
and decided to really deep clean the back
until it was spotless.
About 30 minutes later, the same manager comes up to me
and tells me there are four tables
that need cleaning, and two other tables just sat down and I need to bring their drinks
to them.
I looked at this man with the stare of a 20-year-old who has no bills to pay, and I say,
no, I'm not done cleaning.
He looked shocked and responded angrily, you can finish later, they need help.
And I countered with, no, it's filthy here, we don't want a health inspector to just walk
into the fields, do we?
My boss storms off like a toddler who didn't get their candy.
Two hours go by, and I'm on my hands in these scrubbing as if working for Chef Gordon Ramsey
himself.
The same manager comes back again with a smirk and says,
Wow, this looks like it's going to take you all day long.
Maybe you should come to the front and help the servers
since there's a huge Sunday rush.
I replied with, you know, you might just be right,
and I go back to cleaning and he storms off again.
Fast forward to two minutes before my shift ends.
My knees, legs, and fingers
are all aching from cleaning. I shuffle my way to the front where my manager has been
waiting for me, and he says, you finally decided to come help, huh? And I just look at him
without saying anything and clocked out, and then I tell him, sorry, I'm not clocked
in. Then I walked out to my car while he was blowing up my phone.
I didn't care.
I had five days off back to back,
and he can't fire me since I did as he told me to.
The moral of the story is, don't think that you're better
than someone that has nothing to lose.
That was our slash malicious compliance.
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