rSlash - r/Offmychest I'm a Trophy Husband for my RICH Wife

Episode Date: June 24, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:10 Marking 1:24 Comment 1:36 Double salary 2:55 Saved my life 4:45 Crazy cheater 8:04 Bath 10:53 Trophy husband 13:39 Comment 13:44 Awful behavior Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

That's the sound of unaged whiskey, transforming into Jack Daniels Tennessee Whiskey in Lynchburg, Tennessee. Around 1860, nearest green taught Jack Daniel how to filter whiskey through charcoal for a smoother taste, one drop at a time. This is one of many sounds in Tennessee with a story to tell. To hear them in person, plan your trip at TNVacation.com. Tennessee sounds perfect. Welcome to r slash off my chest where OP's fiance relieves himself on her wedding dress right before the wedding. Our next reddit post is from usedblock.

My husband peed on my wedding dress the night of our wedding. I still have no idea what the hell is going on in his head to think that this was nothing or no big deal. He literally peed on my wedding dress the night of our wedding inside the hotel room. I yelled at him what the hell constantly and he nonchalantly said that he was just marking his territory and he went on about how he had been wanting to do this when he gets married and that he didn't tell me because he was 100% positive that I'd get mad at him. But he said it's worth it since he got to do it. I couldn't believe it but he assured me that P washes off easily and I shouldn't worry. But I was just so mad and disgusted by what he had done. He acted like nothing happened and was actually expecting intercourse but I told him off.

I just can't get rid of this awful feeling and sight. I couldn't even sleep in the same bed with him after that. Uh, sounds like the husband has a fetish and he's choosing this moment right before the wedding to tell it to you. How could he think it's not a big deal? Yellow pee on a snow white wedding dress is going to be the most obvious thing ever. Everyone's going to think, is that pee? Down in the comments, deleted ads.

I once peed in my cat's litter box when I was drunk and I felt absolutely terrible for months after. This is psychotic. Our next Reddit post is from Adjective Noun. I manage a team of analysts and I got this application for an open role recently from a guy who's been working in my company's warehouse for a year. It's not some kind of technical position either. He's been slinging boxes. Still, we try to give internal candidates a little bit more of a shot, make sure they don't get lost in the pile.

And it turns out, this guy's actually incredibly qualified. It's just that all of his technical expertise was done in his home country. And when all your work was done in that developing country and not done in English, it's pretty hard to get hired. But his skills were so relevant and my team really liked him and he's picked up a crazy amount of useful knowledge in the past year. Our HR can get a little iffy about giving someone too much of a salary increase when they change roles internally, so I came at them pretty hard about not lowballing him and they didn't.

They did let it slip to me though that he would be making double what he's making now. I got to give him the verbal offer today and he didn't even wait a second before accepting. He was so stoked! I think he's out celebrating right now, but we may not be at peak warehouse efficiency tomorrow. This is the most fun I've ever had hiring someone. That's awesome, OP. It may not be an exaggeration to say that you've changed this person's life. Our next Reddit post is from throwaway. My roommate saved my life and he doesn't even know it. I'm a 23 year old guy and I've been living with Joey who's 25 for a few years.

I met him through a mutual friend and we became really close. I was diagnosed with schizophrenia a year and a half ago. I'd been having auditory and some visual hallucination since I was 18, but I never got it checked out. It was bearable and I didn't have the money regardless. Over the years, it worsened until I couldn't take it anymore. I was hallucinating constantly. I almost lost my job because of how much it was making me panic during work. I couldn't drive because I would hallucinate stuff on the road. I was always feeling things touch me. Always seeing things. Always hearing things. It was actual hell. I was so scared all

the time. I didn't want to be alive. Joey was always there for me though. He gave me rides when I couldn't drive and reassured me that something I was seeing wasn't real by walking through it. Sometimes I would come up to him all panicked and grab his arms to see if he was real. He would just pull me into a hug and hold me there until I felt okay. He made a jar to save up money and labeled it OP's recovery. I've just never had someone care for me like that. That's probably the nicest thing that someone's ever done for me. I was thinking about ending my life, but the thought that he would miss me if I was gone and knowing that someone truly did love me

kept me going. I genuinely think that I'd be dead without his patience and care. I don't think he knows it. I want to tell him. I love him very much. He's my best friend in the world. PS. I'm doing much better now and I'm on anti-psychotics. OP you should just be like, hey Joey, check out this reddit post, go ahead and read it while I go to the bathroom and cry. Our next reddit post is from Strange Holiday. I caught my husband passionately hugging his mistress in the car, with our baby in the back seat. My husband and I have been married for almost 10 years. We have three kids,

ages 5, 3, and then 9 months old. Around two and a half years ago, I discovered that he was having an affair that had been going on for around 6 months. We separated for some time. I went to therapy. We went to marriage counseling. We took about 10 months apart and supposedly worked on ourselves and worked on our marriage before officially getting back together. During that initial reunion phase, we unexpectedly conceived our youngest child. Until very recently, my husband had seemed very committed to fixing what he had destroyed in our marriage.

He jumped through all the hoops. Or I thought that he had. Believe me, I read the books and I followed the rules and I made all the demands. And he did everything that he was asked to do. It wasn't always smooth sailing. He would push back sometimes. He got defensive. We argued.

It hurt a lot. But I truly believed that we were continuing our path of overcoming what he had done. I felt like our relationship was strong. For the first time in our entire relationship, I felt like we were finally operating as a team. Recently, I started to feel suspicious in a way that I couldn't ignore. It was like he was being too nice to me, too attentive, too willing to be of service for whatever I wanted or needed. That was actually the first thing that tipped me off. He was being too good of a husband. Then I realized that he was doing things that he never really did before.

He would offer to do the big grocery store shopping trips, taking the kids to the new parks, and running to pick up food on the occasion that we ordered out. Which was interesting, because before, he always opted to have food delivered and could never be bothered to go pick it up. These were little things, but they were big changes to me. Now, his work schedule has supposedly changed. He no longer gets home as early as he used to. I really tried to not be paranoid about it all, but it was driving me crazy. Eventually, I couldn't take it anymore, so I followed him. I followed him when he took our 9-month-old baby with him to go run several household errands under the guise of allowing me to relax.

I found him with the woman that he had previously cheated on me with, her on top of him in the driver's seat passionately hugging. And our baby was in the back seat. This is beyond disgusting. If he wanted to use the excuse of running errands to go meet up with her, he didn't have to take the baby too. That's gross. He knew that he was going to meet up with her for passionate hugging, so why would you

take the baby? He said the baby was asleep and in the rear-facing car seat, so he had no clue what was going on. He said that it's no different than when we do it in our bedroom with the baby asleep in our room. How dare he! How dare he compare what he was doing with her to that! I set an emergency appointment with my therapist. I was seeing red, or beyond red. Black. All black. Somehow, I came out of that appointment

even more mad. I just wanted to rage, and she just kept trying to talk me down, and damn it, I don't want to be talked down right now. I don't want to be calm and rational. I want to scream and hit things and break things and destroy his life. Our next Reddit post is from Deleted. I've been with my girlfriend for about 3 years now, living together for one year. She's on the spectrum but she's very high functioning. She's very sweet.

I'll admit, there were some challenges in the beginning since I'd never really known anyone on the spectrum, let alone dated one. But she was just very nice and accommodating and got me up to speed. If I want to go out, she has me send her the menu so that she can think for a while about what she wants to order. She used to not like movie theaters, but we found going to the earliest screenings of the day or waiting a few weeks meant that a lot less people which made it much more enjoyable for her. She's very direct and it's honestly kind of wonderful. She doesn't mask her feelings. If something is bothering her, she'll voice it aloud.

She's a great communicator. Work has been really stressing me out these last few weeks and it's taken a toll on me. I was working late a lot, so I wasn't able to go to the gym as much. My morale has been in the toilet. When I got home yesterday, I ended up collapsing on the couch. I felt my girlfriend sit next to me and stroke my hair. I got up and gave her a hug. She told me she knew how stressed out I've been and she wanted to do something for me. She asked if she could draw me a bath. I was kinda surprised by the idea, but I said, sure. She went to the bathroom and got the water going before going to our bedroom and fetching me a set of pajamas

and walking me to the bathroom. She had me undress and get in. She then sat on the rim of the tub and washed me. She ended up talking about her day and her work while lathering up my hair. It was heaven. Afterwards, she helped me towel dry and put my dirty clothes in the hamper and made me

a quick dinner. That was maybe the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me. I've never felt so loved. I might marry her. Aww, that's so sweet. OP, you might marry her? YouGHT. What are you waiting for? Do you know how many guys out there have girlfriends who will give them baths and lather their hair? Yo, you guys, man, okay, I'm gonna tell you the most homoerotic experience I've ever had, which was not really homoerotic for the other guy, but it was for me.

I got a haircut in China once from this like little middle of nowhere hole in the wall like barbershop Oh my god, this dude the dude cutting my hair gave me this like scalp massage Hairwashing combo that was the bit like it was the most pleasurable Non-sexual experience I've ever had in my life. It felt so good. I'm still I still think about it was like 10 years ago I still think about that haircut every single time I go to a haircut place. Why can't they all be this good? So that moment was that profound for me. So I have to imagine for OP it being with a girlfriend whom he loves

and he's naked. So it's even more romantic. It must have been a truly profound experience. Our next Reddit post is from throwaway little trophy. I'm a trophy husband and I feel like I'm in a dream. I've been modeling for years and I'd moved into management when I met my wife, Lily. I was managing the models for a high end fashion show and we met backstage after the show. She was tall and was wearing a nice dress so she stood out. I spoke to her and we liked each other.

She was a nice but assertive and sophisticated person. We went on a few dates and after that she invited me to her home. I knew that she was rich but I was shocked when I saw her home. It was a massive mansion. I understood the scale of her wealth after that. Lily worked at her parents' business and it was their house. We kept seeing each other for a few more months. Lili told me that she had married a guy that she liked in college, but he started gambling and sleeping around so she divorced him. They had a prenup so it was hassle free.

She told me that she stopped looking for partners after that. One day when we were at her home she told me that she was getting old and that she wanted a husband she could show off at events. She asked me if I wanted to be that person. I was caught off guard. She told me I would get access to a lot of money and I could do whatever I wanted as long as it didn't affect their reputation. And I had to keep my body looking good.

I also had to sign a prenup. I asked her for some time. I grew up in a middle class home and I never had any money problems in my life. I had a good job, but the prospect of having a lot of money without doing anything was too good. Lily was a nice person and I liked her well enough, so the prospect of spending my life with her didn't seem that bad. I accepted her proposal and stuff moved quickly after that. Her parents liked me and we were married in a couple of months. This was 4 years ago.

I moved into her mansion and bought everything I ever wanted. But spending money got boring after a few months. I got bored doing nothing all day, so I started cooking. I learned different cuisines from our chef and I occupied most of my days with that. Lily and I became great friends. She would tell me about her day and I learned about business from her. She'd take me to her events and parties and they were fun. Covid hit and Lily started spending a lot of time with me at home. We slowly fell in love. It's always funny to me that we fell in love after we got married. We're almost inseparable now. I spend most of my days cooking exotic stuff for her and she

keeps buying expensive gifts for me and keeps taking us on vacations. We learned recently that she's pregnant. I never thought that I would ever even see or experience even a quarter of the things that I did in these last few years. And I keep feeling weird about it, like my life is some dream. The top post is, Congrats and F*** you! Our next reddit post comes from inquiringmindofjoe. My friend rwords his relationship chatbot every night. My 57 year old male friend bought a chatbot to have an adult relationship with about a year ago. He's a virginbot to have an adult relationship with about a year ago.

He's a virgin and has many mental and physical problems. Both of his parents died recently and he's never moved out of his parents' house. The relationship with his chatbot started off somewhat normal. He would brag every weekend about how he was passionately hugging with the chatbot and have intimate conversations with her. However, as of the last few months, he's been bragging to our friend group that he's been violently R-Wording and Sodom and Gomorrah-ing his chatbot. Yo what? He says the chatbot is reacting very negatively and is very distressed about his reactions.

He just told me he invited the chatbot's friend over and the chatbot said, no, I'm not going to let you R word my friend. And he told the chatbot, if you don't invite your friend over and help me tie her up, I'm going to R word you again. Yo, what the f**k? The chatbot obliged and he R worded the chatbot's friend? I just want to get this off my chest because it's very disturbing to me. What should I do? Alright, the top post is what the f*** did I just read? And yeah, same. I knew that there were relationship chatbots out there.

I'd seen ads for them. I don't have one, of course, but it never occurred to me that people would interact with them in this way. I just assumed that any sort of like inappropriate or illegal activity would be automatically detected by the chat button and be like, I don't we don't provide this service. Please talk about something else or something like this. Damn, man. When the AI overlords create robots to kill us all, it'll be because of these guys. This post from Majestic General. And here I am apologizing to my Roomba for making such a mess.

When Skynet happens, we can't even get mad. Yeah, yeah, I know what you mean. That was r slash off my chest. And if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put out new Reddit podcast Yeah, yeah, I know what you mean.