rSlash - r/Pettyrevenge I Tricked My Teacher Into Eating Bugs!

Episode Date: May 19, 2020

r/Pettyrevenge In today's story, OP encounters his uppity teacher while picking blueberries, and the teacher absolutely insists that OP gives her all of the berries he picked. He happily complies, bec...ause OP's mom knows something that the teacher doesn't... the berries are infested with bugs! So when the teacher smugly bakes the berries into a pie and eats it, OP reveals that she ate a maggot pie! If you like this video and want to see more, hit the subscribe button for daily Reddit videos! Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r8QUQIDIP58 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Metrolinx and cross-links are reminding everyone to be careful as Eglinton Cross-town LRT train testing is in progress. Please be alert, as trains can pass at any time on the tracks. Remember to follow all traffic signals, be careful along our tracks and only make left turns where it's safe to do so. Be alert, be aware, and stay safe. Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best posts from across Reddit. Today we're covering R-Slash Petty Revenge, where no revenge is too small, but first a word from our sponsors. I needed to go to Bath & Body Works for some Welfare Re fills. If you've ever been to Bath & Body Works during the holiday season, you'll know that it's crazy busy all the time, and it usually consists of very long lines.
Starting point is 00:00:50 Due to the high volume of people, I just grabbed three scents quickly and hopped in line. I noticed there were signs directing which line to be in depending on how you're paying. Even though there were signs, the cashiers were yelling something to everyone, but I couldn't hear her clearly. I politely asked a random lady in line with the cashier was saying, the lady rolls her eyes, and instead of just giving me a straight answer, she just begins loudly and rudely reading the signs to me, like I can't clearly see or read them in front of me. I then say, I saw the signs, I just didn't know if the cashier was saying something different. She then turns her back to me and says, um, yeah, no, and kind of chuckles. Anyway, apparently an employee had been standing there. She quickly comes up to me and asks, are you paying with card or
Starting point is 00:01:35 cash? I tell her I'm using card, and she guides me to the front of the store and checks me out with an iPad. I didn't see the lady's face, but my husband said she looked pretty ticked about me going before her. The employee then tells me she heard the conversation and was upset about how rude the lady was being for absolutely no reason. Although the pettiness was not directly from me, it still felt pretty nice to have someone else with more authority to be petty for me.
Starting point is 00:02:01 Haha. As Raskapit points out down in the comments, this isn't petty revenge, it's petty aven me. Haha. As Raskupit points out down in the comments, this isn't Petty Revenge, it's Petty Avenge. Our next Reddit post is from Gangaston. I live in a house off campus with housemates or my friends. I bought myself shampoo and body wash because I'd recently run out of them within a couple of weeks, which I thought was weird, but didn't really think much of it. I asked my housemates if anyone had used my shower products and nobody said they did. However, this is where I realized I wasn't the only one using MY products. Fast forward a couple weeks and I'm running low again. I was keeping an eye
Starting point is 00:02:35 on my products and I realized it was going quick again. The other bottles that belonged to my housemates had been bone dry for a week. I lived with five other people and there were three or four empty body washes and shampoos. I knew that someone was using them, but I didn't know who. So in my active petty revenge, I took my bottles, which were on its last lake and added some white vinegar and mixed it around. On a side note, vinegar is actually good for your skin and hair. My plan was to add the vinegar and wait to see who came out smelling like it. Later that day, three of my housemates came out of the shower smelling like vinegar and they didn't say anything. Actually, the whole
Starting point is 00:03:13 bathroom smelled like vinegar and one of my other housemates who uses the shower across the hall had pointed it out. I knew exactly who they were and I called them out on it. Best part was that one of them had a date and they were late already and couldn't take another shower. Hope you and the date enjoy the new cologne. Our next Reddit post is from Purple Womit. Growing up, we often used to pick blackberries around a popular park slash quarry. One weekend when we were very young, we were interrupted by our teacher Mrs. W.
Starting point is 00:03:42 I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to take those, she said. My friend lives in that cottage at the age of the quarry and the residents have priority. Now we had full bags, lots of scratches, and we weren't inclined to let them go without a fight, but to our surprise my mother smiled meekly and said, I'm sorry, here you are. After the teacher left, she told us why. Malicious grin. Now if you thought that teacher was just a jerk, it gets worse.
Starting point is 00:04:11 Our school had a stove in the classroom. And side note here, a lot of people down in the comments are calling this story BS because schools don't have stoves in the classroom. But I'm thinking maybe this is a regional thing because actually in my high school we had a couple of classrooms with stoves in them. We had home at classes where students would learn things like sewing and cooking. So a stove in a classroom is completely believable here. And the teacher decided to cook the same blackberries into a pie in front of around 30 kids
Starting point is 00:04:38 under the age of eight. She styled it into a cookery lesson and we were very excited. All of us had eaten blackberries before but pie isn't a big thing here and that was new. So we watched her make it, print it, pop it in the oven, and then she sent us some break. And when we came back, it was gone and we went back to normal lessons. Being the innocent soul that I am, I was the one to ask, what are you going to do with the pie? Aliciting choruses of,
Starting point is 00:05:06 Can we eat the pie now? The pie was not for you, she snapped at the class. Then, to me, in a very super-cilious tone. I'm sorry that I had to ask your mother to give us the black berries, but my friend had been waiting for a long time for them to get ripe, so she deserved them. That's not why she gave them to you, I said, I was an honest soul. They had maggots.
Starting point is 00:05:33 Don't be silly, she snapped and sent me to sit in a corner for 15 minutes for lying. I still associate corners with teacher-free relaxation. The next day, she came in looking very sick and had a long conversation with my mother, who couldn't keep a secret to save her life and so told us later. During dessert with her friend, my teacher told the funny maggot story, where upon all conversation ended and she learned first hand that maggot's breed in blackberries after rain. Of course, I told everyone
Starting point is 00:06:06 in class. She left a year later. This is a funny story, so I went down in the comments to see if anyone else had similar stories to tell. And this thread is a horrific minefield of people who went picking fruits out in the wilderness, bid into them, and found unexpected surprises. I'll tell you a favor and spare you from the more horrific stories, but suffice to say, if you're ever out in the wilderness and you pick a fruit, cut it in half before you bite into it. Our next reddit posted from X-Gen-Gen.
Starting point is 00:06:38 Dad just told me this story tonight. Before my parents divorced, we lived in a three-house neighborhood. Our neighbors had left of us were friendly and we got along with them well. Our neighbors on the right, however, were different. It was running out to multiple families. One of them being an Asian family was seven cars. This is relevant. There was always conflict with them from 24-7 house parties to trying to break into our
Starting point is 00:07:00 cars. That family always caused trouble for whatever reason. They were dysfunctional and probably in debt with how many cars they had between four people. There was a particular tree in our property that my dad always parked his car under. It was obvious and known that was my dad's spot. One evening, my dad comes home to find the Asian neighbors had parked their car in his spot.
Starting point is 00:07:22 A dead car that they didn't use anymore because they probably couldn't afford to fix it, so they decided our property was the best place to leave it to rot. My dad knocked on their door and asked them to move it so we could park, but the gentleman at the door said in a thick accent. Sorry, no speak English, no speak English, which was obvious BS. My dad was not abused. He told them, all right, just move your car or I'll call someone to get it towed. Two weeks go by and the car is still there. Three weeks, they
Starting point is 00:07:52 still haven't moved the car. My dad gets fed up. They may have seven cars, but that doesn't mean they could park on R property. My dad decided to take matters into his own hands. He ran into tow truck and waited for the family to be out of the house. He hooked up the car and drove it out to a random parking lot in a shopping center nearby and left it there. Next day, the neighbor came by. Hey, man, do you know what happened to my car? In perfect English, not a trace of accident all of a sudden. Surprise, surprise. My dad played dumb about it.
Starting point is 00:08:26 I thought you couldn't speak English. Sorry man, I don't know what happened to your car. If you moved it though, thank you man, I appreciate it. Our neighbor couldn't do much because he didn't have any proof my dad did it. Didn't talk to us or park in our spot ever again. These side marios all you can eat is all you can munch a soup, salad, and garlic home. Oh my, mom, me, I gotta move out of here! For your holiday season, real Canadian superstar has more legendary ways to save than any other major grocery. Until December 6th, get a free jumbo point set when you spend $300 or more.
Starting point is 00:09:04 Plus, PC-opliners can get select PC or no-name cheese at $3.99. Conditions applies to fly for details. Down in the comments, Enzy Wolfgang says, was waiting for the last line to be your dad saying, sorry, I don't speak English when they came knocking on a store. And to that, Diesel Writers shares this story. Or better yet, determine which Asian language they speak and learn their pronunciation of, I don't speak whatever. When I was in high school, I had to commute in a car with two girls who were teaching each other Greek. I didn't participate, but keyed into the fact that that's what they were doing. Two to three months later, they
Starting point is 00:09:36 were bouncing around since a holiday was coming up. They turned around in their seats and started talking to me in Greek. I guess trying to rile me up. Now was my chance. I just glanced out and busted out the only three words of Greek I know. They me loud Ilinika, or something to the effect of, I don't speak Greek. Their eyes got wide as they tried to determine how much I'd been aavesdropping on them and how I was somehow a walking Rosetta stone. Totally worth the research to figure out how to pronounce it. Our next Reddit post is from OMGUCrunt. I, a 22 year old male, used to live with three other guys. One of them had a girlfriend who was over all the time. She cleaned and bought
Starting point is 00:10:17 stuff, so it was cool for a while. Then she asked us if she could pet Sid to newborn kittens for a week while her parents were out of town. I knew I was allergic to dogs, but I didn't know I was deathly allergic to cats. The cats get there and after a day, I'm an allergic mess. However, I agree to them staying. There's not much she can do with them, so I put up with it for a week. A week goes by and the cats should be gone. I get home and they're still there. The girlfriend says, oh, they're gonna stay for another week. On top of that, the girlfriend's boyfriend, my roommate,
Starting point is 00:10:54 his mom has fallen and her to neck pretty bad and is in the hospital, so now he's watching his dog at our apartment. So I try to keep cool. Girl, the cats have got to go. Sorry, the week is up. You can't just keep them here. I told you I'm allergic, and you don't pay rent, so get them out. As for my roommate, I told them that I'm sorry about his mom, but that I can't keep living with animals I'm allergic to. No one asked me if the dog could come, and no one asked me if the cats could stay longer. I suggest maybe they keep the animals at his girlfriend's apartment who lives a whole mile away.
Starting point is 00:11:28 My roommate says, you are so ridiculous. You're crazy. My mom is in the hospital and you care about my dog being here. And his girlfriend says, I can't just bring these animals to my apartment. I have roommates! Gee woman, what are we? I storm out of the apartment and immediately head to the leasing office. I tell them that we have three animals in our apartment and that we have not paid the pet fee,
Starting point is 00:11:56 500 bucks per animal. I ask them to come by later and make up an excuse that the animals are being too loud, the neighbors are complaining, and that we didn't pay our pet deposit. The next day I come home from class and the girlfriend is crying on the couch. The leasing office came by and said we had to get rid of the animals due to the complaints. Oh no, I responded. Luckily, they got a warning about the pets and didn't have to pay the $1,500. I suck at confrontations, so I love when other people can take the reins for me. Our next Reddit post is from Burism. This past weekend, my mom visited me in Canada from Ohio to celebrate my daughter's birthday.
Starting point is 00:12:34 We've been through several periods of no contact throughout my adult life because of these issues. Then eventually, I feel bad and let her back into my life. Then she starts to cycle a verbal and emotional abuse again and trying to cross any boundaries I've established. She spent most of the trip lecturing EVERYONE she could about Donald Trump and guns. None of my friends or in-laws up here are American. Everyone is pretty left-leaning just like her. I'm also VERY left-leaning, but I grew up with guns because my dad collected them and
Starting point is 00:13:07 we would go shooting with them occasionally. During one of these rants, I made the mistake of saying I didn't really care too much about guns, but I enjoyed going to the gun range with my brother-in-law. I also said I understood why people went to own guns and felt like they needed them to protect themselves and their family. Ho boy! In my mom's eyes, that made me some right-wing gun nut whose okay was school shootings. I wish I was being hyperbolic, but I'm not.
Starting point is 00:13:33 At one point, she said next time I went to the gun range with my brother-in-law that she hoped I heard the screams of the children at Parkland in my head. She also said she hoped my daughter was safe when I buy a gun. Over the visit, it became clear this is going to be one of those interactions where things are going to spiral into a tornado of craziness that will affect everyone's lives that are even tangentially involved in the fight. It culminated with us getting into an argument in the car and her cancelling the whole visit. It would have ended there, but my mom came back to my house Five times to continue the fight. I told her to leave several times before I called the police because she tried to force her way in and was making a scene in front of my house She ended up checking out of her hotel heading home before the police could ever talk to her and tell her to stay off my property
Starting point is 00:14:20 The next couple of days she sent me texts and voicemails filled with insults and more nonsense about guns and Donald Trump. As if the crux of our disagreement was about guns and not her sucky parenting or her refusal to get help for what I am pretty sure is some kind of personality disorder. So yesterday I was telling my wife about some of the texts and voicemails I'd received from my mom and my wife said to me, I did something bad. I asked her what it was and she told me that she almost wrote my mom an email telling her off. Luckily, my wife said she was way too Canadian for an actual confrontation. So, her revenge? I signed your mom up for every in-array and gun mailing list I could find. Our next reddit post is from Old Man, KLC.
Starting point is 00:15:06 We moved into a new cookie cutter neighborhood, and since then, we've been bothered by pest control, carpet cleaners, lawn care, solar panel firms, etc. This was multiple times a day at first, but then we put up a no-s listening sign and for a while, it worked pretty well. Fast forward to this week, salespeople have rang my doorbell daily, despite my sign. I started by chewing them out and finding their businesses online to leave bad Yelp and Google reviews about the encounter.
Starting point is 00:15:33 Then I researched city ordinances. Apparently, they need a permit, which most don't have, and they can't ignore no soliciting sign. It's 250 bucks per violation. Awesome. Had my first victim yesterday who acknowledged he read my sign, but thought his info about solar panels was something I'd want to hear even though I specifically had a sign because I didn't want to be bothered. I chewed him out and when he left called the police non-emergency number. The police came after only 15 minutes and caught up with him down the street. I don't know if he was sighted, but he just sat on the curb
Starting point is 00:16:09 after the police left, probably because they told him to stop knocking on doors period due to a lack of a permit. He had to wait there for at least an hour and a half for his ride. That was our slash petty revenge, and if you like this content, then please follow me and leave a 5 star review on iTunes. our slash petty revenge and if you like this content then please follow me and leave a 5 star review on iTunes.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.