rSlash - r/Relationships My Partner Won't Stop Farting And It's Destroying Our Marriage!

Episode Date: November 28, 2020

r/Relationships_Advice WHY WON'T HE STOP FARTING?! In today's video, OP has a husband who just won't. stop. farting! It makes everything in her life smell terrible. The odor clings to him, his clothes, his bed, and every little thing in their house. She loves her husband, but the nonstop farting is tearing their relationship apart. What can she do to fix this stinky problem? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Welcome to R-Slash, a podcast where I read the best post from across Reddit. Today's subridden is R-Slash relationship advice where OPs' husband won't stop farting. My wife's parenting technique is negatively impacting our five-year-old daughter. My five-year-old daughter has alopecia. For those that don't know, it's an autoimmune disease that attacks the hair follicles. Usually, hair that falls out doesn't grow back at all, but sometimes it will. It can affect the entire body. My little girl was diagnosed at 2, and has so far only lost hair on her head. There are huge patches on the top of her head that are completely bald now. There's no cure, and her mom and I have decided to avoid the risky treatment

options currently available since she's so young. The older she gets, the more aware of her condition she obviously is. She spends a lot of time with her cousins and little girlfriends at her similar ages, and she's mentioned to me countless times that she wishes she had their hair. It breaks my heart as her father. I've taken her to a few play dates and kids that have never met her always ask her about her hair. She parrots off the explanation of the disease to them that her mom taught her and then she acts shy for the rest of the time she's there. At home, she has a doll that has different wigs that she loves playing with and changing them. I worry that my wife isn't putting our daughters

feelings and concerns first. She made a Facebook post about alopecia awareness month with some pictures of our daughter's hair loss and showed them to her. Our little one got sad seeing the pictures of the back of her head where her hair loss is the worst, and asked if she could get a wig like her dolly. Her mom said, Absolutely not! You know you're just as beautiful as everyone else and you don't need one.

As true as this is, I just want my little girl to feel confident and beautiful. My wife believes that the best thing to do about her hair lost is to completely ignore it and just mention what alopecia is to anyone who asked her about her hair. I thought it was a good idea at first because I too want my child to love herself as she is.

However, since she's brought these issues up in her own, it changes the way I look at the situation. And if she wants to wager hats or whatever to feel normal, then I want to do that for her. Kids are also super cool and disease or not. I worry that she'll eventually be bullied due to this. How can I approach this topic with my wife and show her that this parenting technique is hurting our daughter? Down in the comments, I'm going to read this reply from Red Ritter Man. My wife has alopecia. She's very comfortable and confident about it, however she wears a hat in public. When she doesn't, she's constantly approached by people who want to offer their sympathies

on her non-existent battle with cancer. She got tired of launching into explanations of alopecia that left people feeling awkward about their mistaken assumption. It can be draining being the center of attention everywhere you go. A wig or hat can offer freedom from unwanted attention. Denying this basic level of privacy isn't empowering our creating confidence, it's doing the opposite. Yeah, I agree with this comment or OP.

I get that your wife is trying to give your daughter the confidence to be your own person, but whatever own person just wants to wear a wig. Serious topic, I'm experiencing tensions due to farting. My husband, Mike and I are both in our 30s and we've been married for over 10 years. Like any marriage we've had our ups and downs, but we're in a solid committed relationship. However, for the last year or so, we've had ongoing discussions about a minor health issue that Mike has developed, and it's starting to affect our marriage in a really negative way. The health issue might develop a sudden, severe lactose intolerance, and he refuses to change his diet. He has seen a doctor about it. He'll

take lactate when he consumes dairy, but frankly, he eats more dairy than the lactate can keep up with. And he'll forget to take the lactate if the food isn't obviously dairy. Thank Chocolate, for example. His lactose intolerance is so severe that he farts constantly. And his farts stink! No exaggeration, he farts 30 times a day, and the odor clings to his body, his clothes, and any fabric that he's sitting or laying on. As an example, I'm writing this at 3am on the couch because he's farting so loudly in his sleep that it woke me up.

The sheets on our bed were freshly laundered, and they literally smell like farts less than a day later because of his farts. Where the relationship issue comes in is that I find his lack of concern for his body, his diet, and how his constant farting affects others troubling. I acknowledge and understand that he digested dairy just fine for 30 years of his life with no problems, and it's an adjustment to change his diet in such a drastic way. I try to supply him with dairy-free meal and snack options. I can't control every morsel that he eats though, nor do I have the desire to. However,

I find it selfish that he knows that he has violent side effects while eating dairy, and he continues to eat it without carrying how his lactose intolerance affects others. Our cars smell like farts. Our house smells like farts. His clothes smells like farts. His body smells like farts. I've expressed how disgusting and completely preventable the situation is. And he's retorted several times how I'm exaggerating and need to get over it. My question is how can I be supportive without being controlling? How can we work through this change in his life without having permanent riffs due to his farting? OP, there's really only one solution to your problem. You're just gonna have to make

him wear a butt plug all the time. And then OP posts in an update. The morning after I slept on the couch, my acknowledged my frustrations, and apologized for being dismissive of my feelings. He resolved right then and there to seriously change his diet and to be more mindful of what he's eating. Since January 1, he's been completely dairy free. His farting has subsided to a totally normal frequency and he doesn't stink at all anymore. It's been a big adjustment for him to advocate for his own needs, especially while at a restaurant. He's wary of coming across as that needy guy who always asks about ingredients or preparation techniques. However, as time goes on,

he's becoming more comfortable with it. I'm so proud of him, and I support him 100%. OP, I'm glad to hear that your husband finally stopped farting around and stopped farting around. My 32-year-old wife has been having an affair, and I'm broken. I'm a 30-year-old man, and my 32-year-old wife has been having an affair and I'm broken. I'm a 30-year-old man and my 32-year-old wife and I got married in September 2018 after being together for three years.

Right before our honeymoon, we bought a house together in Virginia, and after we got back, we pulled our remaining money and time to completely redo her old starter home in Maryland and sold that in early 2019. We both work full-time jobs in Virginia. I make pretty good money and she makes even better money. My wife, let's call her Katie, decided to pursue an MBA and started last fall. She had an educational trust that her parents started for and therefore didn't ask me for any financial assistance. However, because I saw how time consuming the MBA was on top of her

already large professional workload, I took it upon myself to take care of everything related to our still relatively new home. Including dealing with contractors, managing all our bills, maintaining the house, taking care of our dog, purchasing an assembling furniture, yard work, cooking, cleaning, laundry, and hosting and entertaining our family that insisted on coming over at least two weekends every month. Lately, Katie has been unhappy with our relationship. Complaining that I wasn't spending enough quality time with her and not making her feel wanted.

I tried to argue several times that between her work and studies and my work and home responsibilities, that there simply wasn't very much time to spend together in general. We would frequently not even get to eat dinner until 9 or 10 at night, and I would either need to bring her a meal to her home office or we would quickly eat together and then she would return to schoolwork to study or percolate in group sessions. She would argue back that the things I was doing around the house were simply my responsibility as a husband and that while she appreciated it, it didn't count towards me trying to maintain or build our relationship.

We'd also been arguing a lot about other things and combined with a lack of free time, we would be intimate maybe once a month. But after one particularly emotional and drunken conversation about three or four weeks ago now, I vowed that despite what I already thought was prioritizing her needs, that I would go even further. I began to take off work. I, unlike her, still had to go in during COVID. Or I would go in later leave early. I stopped seeing friends, skipped workouts, and I would even wait until she was occupied with something else to even take a shower. Also, I could spend as much available time as possible with her in-between her obligations.

As a result, things seemed to be slightly improving between us. And now we arrive at last Wednesday. As per usual, I was making dinner for us. We have a tablet in the kitchen that I primarily use for recipes. As I was finishing up, the tablet began pinging nonstop and I checked out what was happening. As it turns out, the tablet was linked to a Google account and I first saw an ongoing Hangouts conversation between Katie and her friend, discussing what to do about someone's wife who had come to her house that day while I was at work. Scrolling through the conversation history, I found more about Katie's lack of feelings

for me, and her longing and dreaming to instead be with some guy who will call Luke. Childhood vaccines have been around for decades, and are safe and proven to help protect children against 14 preventable diseases. Learn more at Canada.ca slash childhood vaccines. A message from the government of Canada. This is just the beginning. Stream the complete Dutton legacy, 1883, 1923, and all seasons of Yellowstone. I love Montana, but I'm doing this far family. Paramount Plus, the streaming home of Yellowstone. I love Montana, but I'm doing this far family.

Paramount Plus, the streaming home of Yellowstone. Physically shaking at this point, I decided to venture away from Hangouts and open her Gmail, where I found several emails going as far back as March between her and Lou, calling each other babe, sweetheart, and my love. Unsure about what to do next. I first took screenshots of everything that I could find, and then stepped outside to call the only person with law experience

that I knew, an executive at my company who I'd become friends with. He advised that I immediately confront her, but first call someone to come over to the house to act as a witness just in case things became physical, or if she might later try to claim that they did. So I had a friend over in about 20 minutes and I confronted Katie. And she confessed to the relationship and admitted that they'd been intimate several times over the past four months, both at hotels and in our home. Now completely distraught, I tried to maintain my composure and ask her to leave. She stated a hotel for two nights, then, despite my protest, came

home on Friday stating that it was her house, too. She insisted on talking when she returned, and not having a witness this time, I decided to record the entire conversation on my phone. She tried to reiterate that she'd been unhappy, but despite that, I've been reaching out to her friends and mother about suggestions and resources she could use to help our relationship. Even though I'd suggested counseling in the past, but she refused. She tried to tell me that she'd made a mistake that she had already broken off with Luke a week ago, that I was the only person she wanted to spend her life with, and the only reason that she hadn't told me about it was because her friends had advised her not

to. She also said that if we truly love each other, that divorce was a mistake, and that we should be able to get through anything. I replied that love is worthless without trust, and then said that if she insists on staying here to please stay in the guest room. Obviously, she has free usage of her home office and guest bathroom, but to please stay out of our bedroom and bathroom unless telling me first. So, now I'm here, sitting in my house alone with just my dog. Her and her aunt, uncles and cousins are currently at our neighbor's house for a barbecue. They don't know what she did.

I can't bear to go over there, because I don't want to talk or even look at Katie. Much less pretend in front of a bunch of people that nothing happened. Ninety percent of me wants to get a divorce, but despite her feelings, I was very happy with the life we were building. We'd even been talking about being pregnant by this time next year. But no matter what I decide to do, I don't want to make that decision without getting more information about what I can do. What might end up happening if we proceed, and I definitely want to talk to a few Virginia lawyers to protect myself. We only have one

joint account with less than $20,000 in it, and the only asset that we share is our house. Opie, give me a break. Oh, if you love me, then you won't get it to Forrest. But if she loves you, then why'd she cheat on you for four solid months? Opie, she's a selfish, lying cheater. Dump her like a bad habit. I'm a 28 year old girl, and my 32 year old boyfriend told me a white lie for almost three years, and I'm not sure if it's a red flag. I'll try to make this as short as possible, but it's gonna be long as hell because there's so much lying going on.

My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost three years, living together for two. We have a pretty good relationship, obviously with ups and downs, but we make it work and we're happy. A little background on me and my boyfriend for context. I come from a single parent home, my father was absent. My mother was by no means perfect, but she did her best with what she had. We were poor. Life was never easy for us, but we had each other.

Since I was pretty young, I've wanted to pay her back someday. I've worked incredibly hard to be able to do so. I help her financially as much as I can, and I regularly pay her bills and send her cash. I'm also her only living child now since my brother passed away five years ago, which basically left me to help her. I don't care, I love my mother, and the right thing to do is to help her when she needs it, but it's stressful. This is relevant because my boyfriend described coming from a somewhat similar past, and it's something we've bonded over. Having mutual experiences seemed to bring us closer. He told me that he helped his parents financially, and we

would often vent to each other about the stress that it brings. I'm not one to confide in many people, so having someone who I felt like actually understood me was meaningful to me. So, here's where the lies come in, and I need someone to either tell me I'm not crazy and this is screwed up, or that I am crazy and this isn't a huge deal. I'm fine with either. When we met, my boyfriend lived in a condo in a pretty swanky part of the city in New England. I found this to be odd, because he was 28 at the time and I know this property is upwards of $650,000 on the low end.

And he was in an entry-level job for only like two years so the numbers just didn't really add up. Whatever, maybe he's just good at saving. But then, since living together, I never once saw a piece of mail for a mortgage payment, electric bill, bill taxes nothing. Not for two whole years. Very odd.

Also when we started living together he didn't have his room rendered out in the former apartment yet so he was still responsible for that portion of the rent. He would send a Venmo payment to his mother on the first of every month for his portion. I don't own property, but I can't think of a scenario where I would vimmo my mother to pay the mortgage on her property that I supposedly own. This is getting more odd. He would then go to his parents house for an afternoon and come back really upset. Usually, when I would ask why, it was because they were having financial problems and he

needed to help them out. I totally understood this and supported him. He's literally cried on my shoulder about this many times. He tried to start a company years back and ended up getting into debt somehow. He told me his debt was $17,000 and that he paid it off. I was confused because I met him only 2-3 years after the supposed debt occurred and it was already paid off. He told me when he moved back home after his business failed that he was $17,000 in debt and living in his parents' house working at a minimum wage job. How someone with a minimum wage job pays off that much debt in three years, I'll never know.

We got into a fight a few weeks ago and I finally had enough evidence to confront him about these things. Long story short, he doesn't help his parents. They actually pay his phone bill and that was all a lie. He doesn't own that apartment and he didn't pay off the debt from his company. He initially told me that his parents helped pay it off and then like three minutes later he came clean and said that his business partner paid it off. So I have literally no idea what the truth is there. And if anything, in my eyes, his parents are the one who are financially supporting him. So now, I'm dating a 31-year-old man who doesn't pay his own phone bill, and who was lying to me or completely fabricating aspects of his life for three years. And then, when I confronted him

about it, he continued to make up lies and then came clean about them five minutes later. I'm obviously concerned that he could lie for this long about fundamentally important things like our values and so on. I sincerely thought that I would marry this man. He seemed to understand me like no one else and to be a truly caring and genuine person. Now I'm having a hard time rationalizing actually planning a life around someone who would not only lie about their background and family, but also the financial aspects. Aside from that, I now can't tell what's the truth and what's a lie. I've also noticed other things that he's lied about. I've called him out on them and he's denied them outright to my face. I see this as a form of gaslighting as I know

I'm not wrong, but he's trying to convince me otherwise. Am I overreacting? Is this a white lie that went haywire? Or is this actually a series of complete and utter BS used to manipulate me? And also, is it insane for me to actually consider a life with this man? Any advice would be appreciated. OP, how are you calling this a little white lie? You know those days like in the middle of winter when it's been snowing all night and you go outside and just everything is completely white. The ground is white, the trees are white, the houses are white, the sky is overcast so it's like white gray and it's just white as far as

the eye can see. That's the kind of white lie that this is OP. It's just lie after lie after lie. Like how can you even think that you know who this person is anymore? You said yourself that you can't tell what's true and what's a lie anymore, so how could you build your life with someone like that? And then OP posted an update. It's kind of long and dry so I'm not going to read the whole thing, but the just of it is that OP dumped that lying douchebag. That was our slash relationship advice and if you like this content, be sure to follow my podcast because I put on new Reddit podcast episodes every single day.