Saturn Returns with Caggie - 6.10 Death and Rebirth with Kirsty Gallagher

Episode Date: December 12, 2022

Kirsty Gallagher is a renowned soul and moon mentor, Sunday Times best-selling author, and soul alignment coach and is returning to Saturn Returns this week.  Kirsty chats with Caggie about how the solar system reflects in our own lives, particularly in what we saw during lockdown; and how more of us are recapturing our feminine energy in a bid to find something else to believe in.  They also discuss how to practice death and rebirth; why we need to allow ourselves to grieve all the little endings; and of course, the cycles of the moon. --- Follow or subscribe to "Saturn Returns" for future episodes, where we explore the transformative impact of Saturn's return with inspiring guests and thought-provoking discussions. Follow Caggie Dunlop on Instagram to stay updated on her personal journey and you can find Saturn Returns on Instagram, YouTube and TikTok.  Order the Saturn Returns Book. Join our community newsletter here.  Find all things Saturn Returns, offerings and more here.

Hello everyone and welcome to Saturn Returns with me, Kagi Dunlop. This is a podcast that aims to bring clarity during transitional times where there can be confusion and doubt. We don't grieve. So the only time we ever really grieve is if someone has actually died. But every single thing that ends in your life deserves a grieving process. The end of a relationship, the end of a job, the end of living in a flat you've maybe lived in for two years. And we need to honour all the little endings and allow ourselves time to grieve. Today I am joined by one of my dearest friends and a regular on the Saturn Returns podcast and that is Kirstie Gallagher. I'm sure many of you will be familiar with her from previous episodes

or from all the work she does on Lunar Living. Kirstie not only has become one of my best friends since she first came on the show, she's also excelled in her career and it's been such a joy to see her go from strength to strength. Her wisdom has guided so many people including myself and I just love when we have these conversations because they just flow so freely and there's always so many pearls of wisdom within it. We often are navigating things in a similar time frame, myself and Kirsty, because we both have sort of stumbled into being business owners essentially and work in a similar space so it's really nice that we get to have these chats and to help guide each other through challenging times. A big theme of this episode and it's something I've been thinking about a lot

because Saturn is strongly associated with this and that is this idea of death and rebirth. We obviously don't like the idea of death and I don't mean death in a literal sense as in someone dying necessarily I mean the death of the ego the death of the self you thought you were supposed to be perhaps the death of a relationship and as we go through life we have to mourn these experiences we don't really think in that kind of way because we are probably too heavily focused on the masculine being in that side of our energy being quite linear wanting things to constantly progress and whenever I spend time with Kirsty we come up and think about these concepts that remind us that actually not everything is linear that actually we should be working more with the seasons and trusting the flow of things

trusting that things need to be let go to let things die and know that in that space something better will be reborn i try and encourage myself to do this because it's such a principle of saturn saturn is associated with the grim reaper after all and that's why many people are satinophobic, because they're afraid of what's going to die. Because we like the familiar pain, even if it is a pain. We like to stick in our comfort zone. But your Saturn return often comes and pulls you out of those situations. And it can be abrupt and ruthless in its methods.

But then it creates this space. It creates this fertile ground. This sort of void where we have to go inward. We have to go through the darkness. There's no way of bypassing this. You cannot go round, you have to go through. But once we get to the core of that, we get to uncover who we are authentically

and let everything else die away. So I believe we should see this as more of a moment of celebration and getting ready to invite whatever is supposed to be reborn to come back in. So I hope you enjoy this episode with Kirsty and it gives you some guidance today if you need it. But before we get into this episode, let's check in with our astrological guide, Nora. The unapologetic feminine principle is best described in astrology by Venus rather than the moon. So here are the differences between the moon and Venus in astrology. The moon represents our thoughts, our mind, the mothering we've

experienced and also expressed, the high priestess we all have within us, guiding us. It also represents the way we feel and think, our ability to create, and also the waxing and waning of our emotions and how they either drown us or save us. Then Venus. Venus represents the wild principle, the wild feminine fierce principle we all have, that fiery energy we possess, the unapologetic way to love, the concrete creation we put forth and then the purified desires we have that align us with our true will and the ability to speak out in a way where we burn away anything that is not true to us and our path. Which brings me to a very specific duality in femininity. You see, society pushes us, whether we know it or not, to be like the moon at times, to wax and wane and therefore have no inner stability. The word lunatic is a derivative of the word lunar, which is inspired, I guess, by the French word, which means la lune in French, which

in English means the moon. As women, and even as men, for we all contain the goddess and the god within us, we're meant to find balance between our inner moon and our inner Venus. The moon nurtures, but Venus creates, and brings the ability to be discerning and fiercely become independent from the imposition of what Earths think we should be. So today, do look up your charts and look at the sign your Moon is in and also the sign your Venus

is in. Then strike the balance between those two signs and nurture what the Moon asks astrologically but honor what Venus wants you to create and inspires you to create. Because that's where your feminine individuality lies in. The moon alone will make you lose your mind. Venus alone will encourage total hedonism. But the moon and Venus together become the whole feminine and leaves no space for duality within femininity. So don't be a victim of cycles. Rather, use them to your benefit.

And remember, the stars incline us, but they do not bind us. Kirstie, welcome back. Thank you for having me back. Very excited for what we're going to talk about today. Who knows? Just for the audience, it's quite a witchy vibe we've got going on in our setting right now. Your house is so witchy vibes today. Yeah, Kirst walks in and she was like, it feels like this is a witch's house.

It feels like you might have sacrificed something before I came here. And I was like, what like i'm going for yeah i wonder something's just happened in here before i arrived no it's it's it's scorpio vibes in here today is it totally i love it i'm into it but how's everything been amazing i mean we've just obviously had the lunar eclipses or the eclipses rather the solar and the lunar eclipse and i think we can both safely agree that they they kicked us around a little bit but life feels good at the moment life feels even energetically we're in a we're in a really interesting portal at the moment i think a lot of people are feeling where we're being asked to let go of the old and welcome in the new.

But we're in this place at the moment where life and us are no longer who we were, but nothing's quite yet as it's becoming. So there's almost a void place at the moment where I think many of us are really being called out of our comfort zones, being asked to step up and show up in in ways that are bigger and it's scary and there's a big part of me that just wants to go back into the comfort zone yeah but i also feel like we're creating this new world and i know many people at the moment are a bit directionless and like but what's it all about and what's coming and we don't know yet we've never done this before

we've never been through a time like this before even astrologically this year alone we've had so many once in a lifetime astrological moments yeah they've never happened in our lifetime before so the new world we're being asked to create that's the point we're creating it we're creating what comes next we get to say what comes next but i understand the unknown is very scary for many people because we were just we were just discussing that more on a sort of personal level before we started recording but i always love how whatever's going on in our internal world and personally is also being echoed and mirrored in the collective so i think i love what you just said about this time of transformation that we are all going through.

And also being disillusioned with the structures and the systems that governed us. Absolutely. And that is a huge one because I think for, you know, most people we have lived in this kind of way of feeling that things are safe. Things are guaranteed. Yep. Things are guaranteed, this illusion of safety and that everything is just as it's supposed to be. And you just say, you just do as you're told and kind of pedal along. And a lot of that has disintegrated, has crumbled. That's the whole, I mean, Saturn.

That's the whole Saturn-Uranus squares from last year. So the astrology of last year was governed, or the big astrology theme of last year was the Saturn-Uranus squares. of last year was governed or the big astrology theme of last year was the Saturn-Uranus squares. So Saturn being the planet of government restrictions, controls, boundaries, and Uranus being the planet of liberation, freedom, awakening, and power to the people. Every time those planets squared off, we could see them being played out in the lockdowns and the restrictions and everything coming in. And Saturn and Uranus are meeting at the moment in a final square they won't come back to exact but this is the final time they'll square and we can see this is the saturn uranus square the main theme was out with the old and in with the new so when we look

at life even pre pre-pandemic we're never going back there life's never going to go back to what it was but we also have to sit with do we want it to be was life working before but as you so beautifully say we just that was the way that life was was now we've really been asked to look at and reflect on our lives and decide is this how we want to live is this what we want from our lives is there something different and in this out with the old in with the new that certain neurons have been asking of us we can see now old systems that weren't working are crumbling old ways are starting to fall down those systems of power and control and perhaps corruption and greed and big corporation are all starting to fall down around us and so what needs to happen now is almost arising from from beneath arising from the people and what i mean by that is each one of us now stepping into our own authority stepping into our own power taking which is also very saturnium it's almost

like we've all been through a collective saturn return it's kind of what it feels like yeah and that transformation that death and rebirth and like you say when when we have to kind of pierce that bubble of these systems and everything and realize actually they are crumbling but also to recognize that the ways that we've been living perhaps the scaffolding that we've kind of created to survive in an unhealthy way also needs to be acknowledged and i think that is can be very painful for people and there's often that kind of reflection between the two and that is very much a sort of Saturn return experience it is and sometimes it's easier to stay in that comfort zone isn't it even when you know it's not working we see people people do it so often in jobs and relationships and dynamics that aren't

working and you kind of know it's not working but it feels comfortable and as you mentioned before it's got that like false sense of security around it where we've got so used to what that situation is it feels almost safe your nervous system feels safe in the unknowing because that's what your nervous system has known for so long so we almost become this self-fulfilling prophecy in a way and i think all of us now especially after the past few years and the astrology of next year is very different even to this year let's talk about that we've got really big astrology coming through next year so next year is going to be sort of the biggest astrology in many ways since 2020 but in a really

incredible way so we've just obviously had these last set of eclipses and these eclipses for many people i think have been quite let's say brutal but it's in that we're being we're going through probably one of the biggest shifts in evolution and consciousness that we have in as long as i can think of where we're all now being asked to level up in many ways and step up in many ways and see beyond the illusion and i think take back almost a radical responsibility for our lives that if we want change if we want something different it has to start with us and we have to be here so we so constantly wait for something in the outside world to change for us for someone to make it different for someone to come along and do something,

for our bosses to do something, for our parents to finally validate us, whatever it is. We spend so long wanting something on the outside to change that we give away that responsibility for saying. But we're also conditioned from a very young age to do that. I think especially as women to think that we couldn't possibly have the power and I always like the term like the keys to your kingdom it's like

we always think that they exist within someone else and I think you can particularly see that at the moment with politics where you you know look we often look for politicians to guide us for the answers for that sense of safety and I think everyone's felt so disappointed over the last couple of years but i'm like at this point like can't does anyone expect anything different like why do you keep searching for someone to tell you how to be what what to believe what to what to say and what to do and it's because people aren't aren't familiar with actually looking inward no and also i think it pierces an illusion when you've lived under an illusion for so long you don't again it's that false sense of safety and

security again and once you start seeing everything starts to unravel and it's it's one of those situations as well that i think once you start even going along a spiritual path, let's call it, once you realize that it ultimately lies with you, that you taking responsibility for your life is the only way that you can change it. But you doing that equally means you accepting responsibility for how you've got to where you are right now. And if you've been so used to being like, well, it's my ex's fault that this happened to me and it's my parents fault this happened to me and in that more victim mentality i know that well yeah yeah and say i have to now take responsibility for everything that's brought me to here i'm my part to play in all of this why did i stay why did i put up with it why did i not speak up why did i accept this but then it's only from taking that responsibility that you then get to take your power back to create any kind of change 100 i actually wrote about this in the book because i was so stuck in a victimhood mentality in my just before my saturn returns that i couldn't

conceptualize the idea of playing a part in anything so everything was happening to me and so but like you say it's like when you take radical responsibility for yourself in your life you also have to take the whole you know history of decisions which can be a lot but it doesn't have to be it's what we attach that to so we often attach that with a lot of shame and it's like oh i'm ashamed of myself now and that then put in a weird way that puts you in another victimhood state because you're kind of like chastising and yeah you're in a shame spot rather than going it's like if you if i said to you curse i've realized i haven't taken responsibility for anything you wouldn't go you're a disgrace no you would be like well done for recognizing that like what you know i'm so proud of you for having that awareness like how are you going to take that forward but we don't give ourselves that grace no and it's another self-empowerment piece i think

as well because when you're waiting for something outside of you to change you have to wait for that to change until your life can change as soon as you take that back it all then begins with you and it's a lot of responsibility. But with that responsibility comes the ability to be able to change your whole life. And redesign it. Because I think it's a scary thing. People often approach their Saturn return in this very doom and gloom kind of way. But it is this, it will break anything down that isn't meant for you and that isn't authentically aligned, but it gives you this amazing opportunity to rebuild it in a way that is truthful.

And fully step into yourself, like fully step into that power of yourself and that responsibility for yourself to create what you want to in your life. And I think many women have felt that this year. I've talked for a long time, we've probably talked about it often, that this year was going to be a year of the rise of the feminine there was a lot that happened even astrologically where the feminine was rising and rising and rising and rising and by that i mean the feminine in all of us as well but yeah just to add as a caveat like i think people often think of the feminine is just for the women but it is we all possess the masculine we do and it's but it's out of balance it totally is because as you talked about before we've gone so far on the masculine of corruption power greed control and i'm talking more about kind of the shadow elements of the

masculine then what we've gone into very very strong masculine and also perhaps too far in in the building the linear the like you know if you think of how if you think about the language in which we refer to global warming and mother earth and just not like it's mother earth it's a feminine force but it's like we are as if we own it or we're or we're like we're so disconnected we don't even recognize that we're part of it it's us it's not just like somewhere we rent it's literally the same it's one of the same but we're so like oh i wonder what we're gonna do about this you know i'm not disregarding that it is a huge problem but we the fact that we see it as like such separate entities is quite interesting of how departed we are from the feminine but that

was done very cleverly that was done very cleverly what do you mean well if you look back in kind of neolithic area and all the times that people lived in community they worship nature so the celts used to find all of their gods and goddesses in nature they believed that they could connect to the divine through nature that the nature was part of the divine and so when we look at solstice equinoxes all these things that have been celebrated for years as a way to mark the transitions of seasons and cycles which is what saturn return is really if we started to mark those even place of death and rebirth through life again our lives would be so much better and this is part of what they did is they would honor

the seasons and cycles of nature and with that death and rebirth and then over time as the romans came over and christianity took over they took religion from nature-based worship to civil worship and in doing so they disconnected people from nature because the power then came to man to people and got taken away from nature so when we notice even all the solstices and the equinoxes many of the things that we know nowadays all have all came from those ancient cross-quarter festivals and the solstice and the equinoxes then got renamed and rebranded so many goddesses and many gods would become saints and it all got rebranded into something that then was packaged for the

church and gave the church then ultimate control over people so ultimate sovereignty exactly so it was very clever at that time that worship was taken away from nature and in that we then completely disconnected ourselves not just from nature but from the planets the stars our ancestors would look also it was a straw now remembering that astrology sort of lost its credibility at the same time astronomy split they were studied together they were one and the same together and they were same and then one became a sort of charlatan's practice and the other had credibility the one that allowed us to determine the effect of those planets on humans

was made into something that was charlatan and again to our point we were talking about before with that masculine feminine blend everything then was the feminine intuition guidance, seeking like community with higher spirits higher nature, everything that's

now considered to be a bit woo everything outside the sort of realms of linear thought yes they're all the feminine energies that we we need to recapture back you know that that that knowing so if it's not on a spreadsheet it's not scientific it's not astronomy yeah it doesn't matter and actually that's the fabric of the universe. Yeah, because I actually, I was at something, the thing that I went to in Turkey and there was this very interesting sort of friction between the conversation,

because a lot of it was very masculine, but there was also this kind of conversation around the feminine as well. And it made a lot of the women kind of a bit angry and a lot of women didn't speak and then it kind of it it brought up this thing for me where and then someone was like okay what do people you know when we're talking about the feminine what do we actually mean and no one could really say anything but I think that is in essence it because it's not something that necessarily needs to be described it's more like you say intuitive it's more of a feeling it's more of a connection to something beyond ourselves and beyond the boundaries of ego and that's what we're

needing to lean more towards at the moment but do you think why do you think it's having a renaissance at the moment or it's kind of? I feel like over the past few years, especially, people started to look for something else to believe in. Because our world, all of a sudden, our world has been made absolutely zero sense anymore. Nothing made sense anymore. So we started to do what our ancestors did for centuries. We started to look to nature and to the skies for answers again we started to seek solace in something greater and a connection to something

greater where we could start to find some answers and when we talk about masculine feminine to that point the masculine is the energy of everything the feminine is what moves that around to make it into something so we all want masculine and feminine and it's like you and i speak often about having businesses and we're both very intuitive quite enough feminine just like to sit and dream we then need that bit of masculine in us to create that container to put the spreadsheet in place and to do the things to make to make it all happen yeah because i i don't know about you but i can get very frustrated when i'm just feel like nothing's execute being executed you know it's just like ruminating in the thoughts and the creative aspect but if it's not being brought into the material realms it's

like that's it that's it yeah yeah i i really do believe and i think it's beautiful that it's all coming back around but i do just feel that the past few years have shown as if nothing else that there is something more to life there needs to be something more to life and even in terms of nature i know for many people that hour-long walk you're allowed to do every day which even saying that now just sounds so silly but yeah we'd normally go the same route we're kind of creatures of habits you'd see that same tree would have blossoms and then the leaves would fall and then we started to notice nature again we heard the birds sing we noticed snow drops we noticed this world that we are intrinsically part of like i honestly believe the same life force

energy that moves through nature that causes flowers to grow and the leaves to drop is the same life force energy that grows our hair and our nails but also to kind of tie into what you said a moment ago about how we we are out of balance and we've been to in the masculine and how we sometimes struggle with stepping into that side of ourselves but the world that we occupy is very much a man's world and so we've had to quieten down those aspects because you can't go into work and be you know it's becoming more okay now but people would never say that they were like on their period or anything like it was all hush hush all kept quiet and even if you look at the cycle of a woman, how that is reflective of the cycle of seasons. And we go through

these transitions each month as a woman, but yet we're expected to be go, go, go all the time. And that's how people get burnt out or they struggle with their mental health because they're not recognizing that you're not supposed to be in spring all the time you're not supposed to be blossoming all the time like you have to go inward and you have to like work that and also that how that ties in so beautifully with working the cycles of the moon yes i mean the moon gives us that permission every single month one of the the most beautiful things, the moon teaches me, well, many things, but two of the most beautiful things is in that dark moon energy, when there's no moon in the sky, the moon's disappeared. She's like, I'm out of here. I'm going to go take a few days. I'm going

to go spend time with myself. I'm going to withdraw all the way inwards. I'm going to take care of myself. And then equally on a full moon, I'm going to be my brightest and my boldest. I'm going to take care of myself and then equally on a full moon i'm going to be my brightest and my boldest i'm going to capture your eyes in the sky like how often do you see a full moon and you cannot take your eyes off that full moon she's mesmerizing so the moon equally knows then how to be in her fullest presence and her full potential and to shine as brightly as she can but she couldn't shine all the time and we wouldn't notice the moon if she shone all the time so it's about that beautiful again that cycle of constantly moving through cycles and the moon again asks us teaches us to take radical responsibility for our own lives

because the dark moon we've just touched on is the lowest energetic and emotional point of the lunar cycle so that's the part of the lunar cycle where the moon's going to draw you inwards into your emotions. The moon represents that watery inner world of our dreams, our emotions. The moon talks to us through our emotions a lot. So on a dark moon, you're in your feels. Because what the moon wants to do then is on a dark moon, we go inwards. And the moon's going to show you where you're out of alignment. So if you start to look at, there'll probably be a time where you start to notice once a month that your boss really irritates you.

Or you can't stand your commute. Or where you're living isn't good for you anymore. Or your partner does X, Y, or Z. And if you start to notice, it will be around a dark moon. Would it be fair to say that often the same things come up? That's what I'm leading on to. So you'll start to notice around a dark moon, that same thing is happening over again.

And when you start to track the lunar cycle, you're like, why is it? Every dark moon, I feel the same way about something. And then what should, in inverted commas, happen is that we then follow the cycle of the moon. So we realize on the dark moon, what's not working, what we don't want, what's out of alignment. And then on the new moon, we set intentions of what change we want to create in our life, where we want to take that responsibility for how something's going to change. And then we use the next two weeks as the moon waxes and gets bigger to do everything we can to move in the direction of those dreams. So as the moon is

growing bigger and being a light more in the sky or lighting up in the sky rather, we need to do the same. So the waxing part of the cycle is put yourself out there, let yourself be seen and shine, go and ask what you want, follow opportunities, look for synchronicities, look for signs, do as much as you can kind of out there in the world to really go after what it is that you want. And then the full moon comes and we're at kind of full presence here now. The full moon will show us, well, one of a couple of things.

The first thing we want to do really on a full moon is celebrate. What we do not do enough as humans is celebrate. So even when you and I meet up, we'll very often we'll catch up if we've not seen each other for a few weeks and we'll first of all rather kind of go into what's gone wrong

or what we've done wrong or we've been horrible humans or whatever else and then it's only towards the end we'll perhaps both prompt each other and go yeah but what's what's been really cool

what's been really great so it's unlikely we get together and go oh my god you're not going to believe this incredible thing I did we do we hold space for each other in that way

but our nature as humans and particularly women is to go more on that like oh god i did this and this and to not acknowledge the wins yes so the full moon is like celebrate yourself like the moon is celebrate what you did do celebrate what went well celebrate how amazing you are and then equally the full moon will show you will illuminate for you where you didn't follow through on going after your dreams. So where that little voice crept in that went, oh, that invited that event. Oh no, people might not talk to you if you go there or they might not like you or that person that didn't call you back once, they probably hate you. Or we go into all those stories, we sabotage ourselves and get in our way. The full moon will show you where you got in your own way.

How? By being able to see where, by being able to reflect on that sign came and I doubted my intuition because I didn't trust my intuition was going to be right. Or that opportunity landed in my inbox and I let the email sit there for about a week and then two weeks and then three weeks.

Because we're afraid of our success not failure because I talk about that though because I think that that is something I think both you and I often share and speak about and it's something that you know we're always talking about fear of failure and that's something that people can understand it's fairly easy to comprehend but people don't speak that often about fear of success we're definitely more and i'll definitely speak for me definitely more afraid of success than failure because because the success then means that like the moon i need to let myself be seen and shine so if i reply to this fictional email if we stay on this thread this fictional email that's coming that's invited me to perhaps

go and speak at this big event for x amount of people which means i'm going to then get seen or in front of all these different people that then might give me an opportunity that will lead me into this the fear then is if i go and do this i'm going to be seen i'm then going to be given more opportunity to be seen and as you shine your light more for me I guess then that comes with also the more you're seen the more you're judged the more you're criticized the more responsibility you then have to people who are listening to you to be this version of you so for me the failure is probably no one ever really sees no one even knows about but when you start to succeed and it also means growing into a version of you that can

hold space for that and that's again something we need to again that kind of death and rebirth you've got to let that part of you that you've outgrown die that skin to be shed and we also though need to allow ourselves to be in a void because what we what we'll do is we'll say well i'll let that die away as long as you immediately get the new thing totally and everyone everyone's guilty of that and i talk about that a lot at the moment and i call it like amazon prime you want to amazon prime our life i want to amazon prime my spiritual journey i want to amazon prime moon work if i do one moon ceremony it doesn't work that's it doesn't work we want to amazon prime everything spiritual journey. I want to Amazon Prime moon work. If I do one moon ceremony, it doesn't work. That's it, it doesn't work. We want to Amazon Prime everything.

We want next day delivering our growth. And growth doesn't happen like that. You don't plant a seed and it grows the next day. And you wouldn't expect nature to do that. You'd expect it to go through a period of germination. And you'd actually, when we look at nature, there's nothing to me more beautiful than watching that first little shoot come through the earth

and then it gets bigger and bigger in the flow. That's beautiful with ourselves. I don't want to just be a shoot. I'm pathetic. Look at what small little tiny shoot I am. I should be a big flower like that over there. Again, we really berate ourselves and we want that immediate growth,

but it's the journey of being in that void that is the preparation for being able to hold that version of yourself when you get to where you're going and like you say it's about again mirroring that representation of ourselves in nature and seeing that actually that is the process and it's like the void thing is such a it's such a big one I call it kind of the process. And it's like the void thing is such a, it's such a big one. I call it kind of the fertile void because it's where things grow. Where things grow.

But you have to. But it's beneath the surface. But it's beneath the surface. And also there's, if it wasn't hard, it wouldn't be worth it. But you have to be brave enough to step into that. And I call it a sort of an exile in a way, because often if we apply this to,

if you're navigating your Saturn return or any transition in life and say you've outgrown the people you're around you've outgrown the job you've outgrown the relationship people like you say they want to Amazon Prime their next boyfriend or their next like tribe of people so people wait until that thing just kind of comes knocking on their door and takes them out of their present reality whereas actually it's for the people that can actually be brave enough to step into that void into that exile and to walk it and go i'm i know this is part of the process of my becoming and that is scary lose yourself to find yourself but it's in losing ourselves because we don't we we don't honor death and rebirth we very

much fear death and not only physical death but we fear the death of everything no we don't but what we also don't do and I feel if we did more of we would be much better at this is we don't grieve so the only time we ever really grieve

is if someone has actually died and even then I don't know if we grieve properly we don't know if we do it properly but every single thing that ends in your life deserves a grieving process the end of a relationship the end of a job the end of living in a flat you've maybe lived in for two years and grown as a person we need to honor all the little endings and allow ourselves time to grieve but we don't and we just expect people to get on with it. And then when we don't allow that process of the grieving of what has been let go of,

we can't then really step into the rebirth of what's going to come in because there hasn't been any space for either. So it becomes this funny mix of where we want to stay with one foot in our own life because it's comfortable and there's that false sense of security. But we equally want to grow and evolve and be this other person and we kind of end up this merge between the two and neither feels good anymore and also that unresolved grief is sort of stuck there somewhere it really does so we need to just honor endings more and we need to honor death more and again when we look to nature and we look to our ancestors they did it beautifully because Samhain so Halloween was the Celtic new year and the reason it was the Celtic new year is because

they used to split the year into the light half of the year and the dark half of the year so the light half of the year was when everything grew outside they were like they were outside there was light there was sunshine dark half the year. Everyone was inside. You didn't know if you'd make it through the winter. But what they equally understood was at Samhain, when everything was kind of harvested in and there was kind of the last harvest brought in, that it was here that the new beginnings happened. So the new beginnings don't happen when they happen.

They happen before that. The new crops that were going to grow next summer started now with allowing the land to rest and regenerate, with allowing all the old vegetation to die away and allowing everything to then rest in the underworld in the dark, growing under the ground, the roots nourishing under the ground, the seas germinating under the ground so that the new beginning in spring when everything grew was there so that the new beginning in spring when everything grew was there. But the new beginning started here at this ending, at this death,

at this moment of rest and regeneration. And that to me is beautiful that the new beginning didn't necessarily start at the spring equinox. And we're like, oh, here's all the beautiful things again. Here's the flowers back. And for us, it's the same and i know for me the times i grow most into myself are those times when i'm literally in the dark in the underworld in the moments i i lose myself i don't know who i am anymore i don't know what the point is anymore i don't know what i'm doing anymore because it's in those moments when you allow them and we don't fear the dark and and the death there's a part of me dying away. And she's trying to grasp onto that last bit. It's like an ego death where my ego doesn't want me to

evolve to the next level. So my ego is going to do all it can to try to keep me under control and keep me here. But when you can surrender to that death and surrender to just allowing it all to go whatever needs to go must go whatever needs to come in can come in there's something really beautiful that happens and that's the beginning you feel like everything is ending yet that's actually the new beginning and preparing the soil your your soul soil the soil within you for what's going to grow out of that i think once you get actually start to see the rhythm in that you can lean into it a bit more but for people that are just not familiar with that how can they begin to practice that i guess ritual of death and rebirth so follow start by following the lunar cycle so around the dark

moon start to notice when the dark moon is and that dark moon gives us that moment of what do you not want to take into the next cycle with you what do you need to allow to die away what do you need to leave behind and even if you don't necessarily act on it immediately as we were talking about before you'll start to notice those patterns so i think we got as far as the full moon the full moon will show you what you need to let go of the waning part of the lunar cycle then is used to let go of those sabotages those doubts those fears those inner voices it's the time to do the real inner work to expand your inner you because again nothing on the outside world is ever going to come in and make you something. That work has to take place inside.

So the work of the waning moon is that inner work. Where do I need to believe in myself more? Where do I need to trust myself more? Where do I need to believe in my intuition more? Because I've noticed it's nudged me a few times and I've ignored it. And when we look at intuition and things, we normally learn about intuition from the times we don't follow it. Damn it, I knew I should have done that. I was just about to say that. I was just about intuition from the times we don't follow it. Damn it, I knew I should have done that.

I was just about to say that. I was just about to go there and we don't. So the waning moon is when we start to look at, oh, every time I've ignored my intuition, what if I start to follow it instead? But what we find is if we don't do that work of letting go in the waning part of the lunar cycle, if we don't allow those deaths, the same things will continue to come back up over and over and over again and there won't be the opportunity for the rebirth and so it's really

important to do that work in the waning part of the lunar cycle and to to almost get a bit comfortable as well with being uncomfortable because again it's in those it's in those moments of discomfort it's in those moments of listening to that voice and i get asked so much a question i get asked a lot one of one of two is how do i listen to my intuition and what's my purpose they're probably the two most main asked questions we want to listen to our intuition when it's telling us the good things and to follow this and to go out there and do that but we don't want to hear that intuitive voice when it's telling us, you've got to leave your job. This isn't the right relationship for you. This isn't what you need to be doing.

You're putting up with this and you shouldn't be. You're playing small here. And to get to the true voice of our intuition that actually tells us, go do this. This is a thing for you. We first have to go through those murky parts of our intuition that ask us to act on the things that we need to act on to take us to where we're have to go through kind of those murky parts of our intuition that ask us to act on the things that we need to act on to take us to where we're going to go and it's in those acting

on those things that two things happen first we start to learn to trust ourselves because when we follow that little intuitive nudge especially when it's telling us something we don't really like we start to learn to trust ourselves in that little voice. And it's also in the doing the thing that we then grow and evolve enough to be able to step into that version of ourselves that our intuition wants us to be. Your soul carries the full potential of you. Your soul wants you to grow into that full potential of you and your intuition is your soul speaking to you to help you to grow into that fullest version of you and so first that little voice is going to tell you where you're out of alignment with that version of you

where your actions aren't matching you know where you're saying you want something but then doing something else when you're where you're not living alignment, where you're not being true to you, where you're not allowing yourself to reach your full potential. That's what we're going to hear first. And that's normally the little bits that we don't want to hear, but they're a necessary part of our theme for this evening. Something has to die for something to be reborn. The tree has to lose its leaves in order for new growth to be able to come through. And you mentioned, you said that there was a second thing that people ask you a lot about. Oh, your purpose. It's you. And I can't put it any more simple than that.

Your purpose is you. Most people think that their purpose is some elusive thing outside of themselves that they have to search for and try and find and they're probably never going to get there. Your purpose is you. And we again think that our purpose is our job. And probably eventually it will be because you can't then not share what it is that's burning within you. But your purpose is to be all of you. that's burning within you but your purpose is to be all of you and again how can we step into this job this role this thing if you don't know who you are it's impossible it's impossible and so your purpose is to to be you your soul came down here as a unique expansive infinite individual

to do something in this world that only you can do and you came down with we look at our birth charts as well your birth chart is a unique snapshot of the moment you come into this earth and your soul chooses that moment some people are early or late your soul chooses that moment based on that birth chart because your birth chart then is a blueprint of many of the lessons you came down here to learn and the challenges you came here to overcome and what you came to grow into and so our birth chart gives us even a little insight into what your purpose might be but your purpose then is to just be all of you and the whole time that you dim and you hide and you play small and you hide away parts of yourself. You then deny the world of your purpose.

And we also need to remember that we don't just have one purpose. So we have lots of little purposes that will eventually lead you to bigger purposes. So if I look at my journey, I became a crystal healer, a reiki healer, a regressional therapist. And then I was a yoga teacher and that was a purpose for me I loved teaching yoga and then a meditation teacher and then moving into the lunar work and the soul work so all of those little purposes have brought me to here and I became a crystal healer 22 years ago when no one was doing crystals they weren't fashionable no one was wearing them and then wrote a book a year or so ago about crystals, having no idea that that would come like a full circle and that purpose again would come into play.

So I think we need to again stop looking at our purpose as something outside of us, that when I find my purpose, my life will change. Again, it's giving that responsibility away to something outside of you, and instead to I'm my purpose and by me becoming more and more of me I get to really step into that purpose because again your soul knows that full potentiality and every lesson that your soul goes through is growing you to that full potential it's giving you the wisdom you need to get there thank you for listening to this episode i hope you enjoyed it and that it gave you comfort today like i said at the beginning whenever i have these conversations with kirsty i always feel very grounded and very understood she has this way of making very abstract or complex things feel digestible and relates whatever is going on in the stars and

the sky to us as individuals she recognizes the collective shifts and the personal internal ones and how these two are in dialogue with each other always and as a mission statement of saturn returns it reminds me we are not alone. Thank you so much for listening to this episode. Goodbye.