Sawbones: A Marital Tour of Misguided Medicine - Sawbones: Self-Surgery

Episode Date: November 15, 2013

Welcome to Sawbones, where Dr. Sydnee McElroy and her husband Justin McElroy take you on a whimsical tour of the dumb ways in which we've tried to fix people. This week: Be your own doctor! Music: "Medicines" by The Taxpayers (http://thetaxpayers.net)

Saw bones is a show about medical history, and nothing the hosts say should be taken as medical advice or opinion. It's for fun. Can't you just have fun for an hour and not try to diagnose your mystery boil? We think you've earned it. Just sit back, relax, and enjoy a moment of distraction from that weird growth. You're worth it. that weird growth. You're worth it. Alright, time is about to books! One, two, one, two, three, four! We came across a pharmacy with a toy and that's lost it out. We pushed on through the broken glass and had ourselves a look around.

The medicines, the medicines, the escalant macaque for the mouth. Wow! We're everybody and welcome to Saw Bones, a marital tour of misguided medicine. I am your co-host Justin McAroy. Hey, I'm Sydney. Sit, Stirr. Backward Sydney, it's going on, babe. Oh, just, you know, not...

I'm not feeling too good today. Don't sound great to me right now. Ah! No. Um, it great to me right now. Ah! No. It's a little tummy pain, it's a little. I mean, I feel right here, let me see where it's in it. Okay, that's bad. Whoa, my audio just spiked really bad.

I'm sorry, for those at home sitting did not mean to be in such mortal pain. What's going on, sweetheart? Let's don't do that again. I won't do that again, Just tell me what's wrong. We're going to get through this. Well, um, is it gas? No.

I know you like when I ask is it gas? Is it gas? No, if I wasn't hurting so badly, I'd punch you. What's wrong sweetheart? I've, um, I see, okay, I've got this pain. It's kind of down in like the right, um, lower part of my stomach. Mm hmm. Uh, I've got this pain. It's kind of down in like the right lower part of my stomach. Mm-hmm. I'm, oh god.

I'm running, I think I'm running a fever here. Definitely run a fever. You probably think you're making it obvious to people what's going on with you, but us, us, us, noobs need a little bit of guidance. What's, what's the problem, sweetheart? I hate to break it to you,

but I think I got an appendicitis. Oh no. Oh, okay. Should podcast. I keep drinking this beer to try to make it go away. Is that going away? It's not advisable medically speaking. No. I just, I hate doctors.

I, yeah, well, wow, really? Yeah, I just can't, I can't stand them in hospitals. I don't, I don't want to go to the hospital. It's surgery. I don't want to go under anesthesia. What are surgery. I don't want to go under anesthesia. What are you going to do after you pick up your Oscar for awesome acting? What are you going to do?

I don't know what you're talking about. What are you going to do? I know this is going to sound kind of crazy. Go on, I'm here with you. But I mean, you know, I went to medical school and like technically that license, I mean, it gives me a right to do anything, you know? I mean, I have the right to do surgery if I want to.

I mean, I don't have privileges anywhere because I'm a family doctor, but I can do it. You could do, I mean, you could do it. I mean, I've seen them in med school. Wait, okay, wait, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, option. That seems unlikely. It's just I mean it's no it's no big deal. I'll just I've got to get down to the hospital. I've got to steal some local anesthetic. Hopefully some sterile drapes and a scalpel. Okay I'm gonna make you a deal. Okay here's my deal here. Are you willing to hear me out? Okay we don't have much time though probably probably. All right, here's my deal.

You take this pill that will make your appendix stop hurting for a half hour. It's appendisol. What, what, what, you take this pill? Is this a patent medicine? This is a appendisol, and it'll make your appendix stop hurting for half hour. And you, if you can show me there's any historical basis

for doctors doing this sort of thing I I will let you remove your panic. Are you sure this is it just bottoms up an opium? Oh Wow That really works not bad right that's some good stuff mostly meth. Oh All right, you got 30 minutes. Yeah, I'm riding this dragon for 30 minutes. I'm excited ride the snake tell me about doctors who have performed surgery On themselves well, I'm not breaking new ground here Justin people have done this before um back in 1949 there was a doctor in Colorado George Baldurston and

He didn't luckily for him didn't have an appendicitis, but he did wonder what it was like to be under anesthesia. He wanted to see what the experience was for, he was a surgeon and he did surgeries. And so we wanted to see what the experience was like for his patients. So he decided, you know what, you don't need your appendix, make, might go bad at some point.

I better just take my own out. Okay, okay. I have a problem my own out. Okay. Okay. I have a problem with Dr. George Baldurston. I'm assuming he's dead. So I can't bring it to him directly. Well, he did survive the surgery. No, spoiler, sorry. Okay, that's fine.

Dr. George, I can dig you wanting to see what anesthesia's like. I don't know why you had to choose that moment to remove your appendix. That seems like sort of throwing good money after a bad. Like you're trying to see the effects of anesthesia. That's fine. Why can't you see the effects of anesthesia on you like trying to do a sudoku?

Like I don't know why you had to see like I got us here bad. This is let me get a knife Well, he just wanted an authentic experience, you know, he's patient He wants to take experience by like doing some like gardening while on on anesthesia Why do you have to choose that moment to do surgery on yourself? I think the most amazing part is he didn't use a mirror to do the surgery. I don't know. I've tried to envision the position you'd have to lay in to get a good view and not use a mirror. I think it's down facing dog, right? He was back to work in two days. Yeah, it also, there was also some thought that the reason he did it is because he had been kind of criticized publicly by a member of the community who said that he had done a surgery and that he'd botched it and he wasn't a good surgeon and so he went there.

Where do they get off? He wanted to prove to everybody. Questioning, Dr. George. He knows what he's doing. He's a, he's a seasoned pro. He was not the only one in history to remove his own appendix. Really?

No, there's actually what I think is a pretty cool move. So unlike Dr. Baldursten, Dr. Rogozov, which is a name some people may be familiar with, he was a physician at the Soviet Research Station in Antarctica, in Antarctica, back in the 50s and 60s. No, no native bees in Antarctica. We learn that from the chase yesterday. That's right.

There are no bees there. There might be bees, but they are like tourists. They're just visiting bees. They're just visiting bees. Can you imagine how cute they are with their little Hawaiian shirts? They're called bee targets, strike targets. Bee cameras. Love it.

Okay, so tell me about this cat. So he, like I said, he was the only physician stationed at this, at this research setup, you know, out in the middle of nowhere. And he started having symptoms that he diagnosed. He finally realized we're in appendicitis. So you got to figure that's pretty scary. It's 1961 transportation home is not readily available.

An appendicitis is a time-limited condition. You've got to do something about it before it ruptures. Because if that thing bursts, it's bad news bears. It usually is. Of course, it can rupture and it can kind of wall itself off in like a little pocket of infection. So it's not always immediately fatal, but yes, it's a bad situation. It can flood your system of toxins. You can become septic. You can definitely die.

And that's what he thought was gonna happen. He actually wrote about how he was getting sicker and he knew what was happening. And he didn't want to tell anybody else around him. He had like a mechanic and like a geologist and other people who were very intelligent, but had no idea how to do surgery. And he didn't want to tell him what was going on

because he knew the end was coming. So what do you do? So he decided to take matters into his own hands. Literally. So he got his friends, actually I think it was a mechanic and a meteorologist who were at his sides and handed him instruments. He used local anesthetic and a mirror

and removed his own appendix. Fantastic. It's pretty amazing. his own appendix. Fantastic. It's pretty amazing. That's pretty great. Yeah. See George. See Dr. George, that's how you do it. Wait for the need to arise.

Yeah, I think it's more heroic when you actually need to. To continue kind of the storyline here that you really don't want to be stationed in Antarctica for any reason, there was another doctor in the 90s, Dr. Jerry Nielsen, who there's actually a great book written about this and I think there was a movie based on it too. She was stationed alone there, the only doctor. She discovered on self-preserved exam discovered

a lump in her breast. Oh no. She biopsied it herself. She actually teleconference with doctors who did those procedures to tell her how to do the biopied it herself. She actually teleconference with doctors who did those procedures to tell her how to do the biopsy on herself, which is pretty amazing. Yeah, that's crazy. And not only she did one,

but then the way that she kind of stored the tissue and sent it to be examined under microscope and all that, it didn't work, it wasn't viable. So she had to do a second viopsy on herself. But I mean, she did it and she diagnosed yourself with cancer and then gave herself chemo there. Whoa! Yeah, yeah.

I mean, she was doing it through with the help of, you know, doctors teleconference, then, but I think it's pretty amazing. That's fantastic. Wow. I don't have a joke to say. It's like the hardest core thing I've ever heard. Well, I thought it was the hardest core thing I ever heard, but as I was kind of looking into this idea that,

I mean, my thought was probably only doctors did self-surgery. Because why would you think about doing surgery on yourself if you didn't at least have some familiarity with anatomy physiology Anything. Yes, scalples You know how blood works Blood bones all the all the important parts so Gully works what I found is that what I have dubbed civilians or non medical personnel are actually

Maybe even more likely to attempt surgery on themselves. I'm surprising. And that's a nice medical profession. Yeah, I can do that. And there are lots of reasons. People watch people watch cooking shows and think they can be a master chef. Like I don't know why I don't know why we don't all immediately assume like I watched ER until I'm bad.

I watched most of house. I think I'm handling it. I saw Clooney stick that straw in that guy's neck. I got this. I'll stick a straw in my neck. So there have been, like I said, non-medical personnel who've attempted various surgeries. Some because they had to others because,

I don't know, the doctors seem like an awfully long way away. Lazy, you're saying that, Lazy? Pathologically lazy. One patient that definitely had to was, as recent as 2000, Aynas Ramirez, who performed her own C-section. What could have necessitated that? How did this catch her by some

brush? She was laboring on her own. She had labored for many hours and realized she didn't have, she was in a remote area, didn't have a midwife or a physician or a nurse or anyone to assist her. Realized that the baby was not going to come. This was her, I believe, fifth child, so she was familiar. And she decided... She knows a clinger when she sees one. There's only one way that this baby's coming out. So she got, I believe, a kitchen knife and performed an auto-seexion. Auto-seexion here, meaning, like, to herself. Yep. Just sliced it open and cut that baby. I wonder if she had a scar. All right, I wonder if she had already had a C-section

because that would be almost sort of like tracing in a way. I think that would make it a little bit easier if you had a scar to work on. I know, it doesn't. You know of, you know. I know you're doing it. Now, if she had, there's just more scar tissue

that you have to get through. Oh man, that is rough. Now, but she performed her in C-section. The reason that it's fun to tell the store and a podcast is that she did survive, absolutely. I believe she actually sent one of her young children, like her six-year-old son, to call for help. Not the baby.

Yeah, she covered up, no. Not the newborn. This is a family. This family is about nothing, if not self-suffridged. You are going to go learning some of that. This is a fair trade. I just cut you out of my own uterus. You are gonna go learning some more. This is a fair trade.

I just cut you out of my own uterus. You're going to go for help. You can pick up an iPhone and push the buttons. You can't use Siri. Okay, I'll let you cheat, baby. See, although to be fair, hopefully if she had Siri, that would have been the first call.

One would help. If she had even one to two bars, I think is enough to to get 911 on the horn. She survived and the baby survived. The child got help and she was taken to a hospital where the wound was repaired and she had damaged her bows and stuff too and anyway they fixed everything up and she did better. So really heroic story. Yeah, that's pretty great.

Next time I hope she goes to a hospital though, I don't think there's a tricky one or a peat. No, why temp fate? That's what I say. This heroic story is I think a little bit in contrast. So let's go back pretty far to Boston Corbett who again, I'm sure you know who that is, Justin. Obviously. If my history does not fail me, that was the inventor of the Malo Mar.

Boston Corbett. That's completely wrong. Okay, who's Boston Corbett? He's the soldier who killed John Wilkes Booth. Okay. All right. He performed surgery on himself, obviously not a C-section and not an appendectomy, but he castrated himself. Now why did he do that?

He was tempted by prostitutes. He was a God-fearing man, did not want to give into this temptation, and so he thought this was his only recourse. It must have been hard for Boston after killing John Wilkes Booth because he knew the publicity was coming. He knew that the reporters were going to start swarming it. Listen guys, I'm happy to answer a few service questions. Let's not get too personal. Boston's made some decisions. There's a lot of skeletons in this closet. And not as many bones as

you would think. Wait, I remove my penis bone. Wait, do you know what castration is? That's I know where it's where you remove the, the, the, the balls. Can we say testicles? We're adults here. The testicles. Just making sure. The testicles. And for the record, there is no penis bone. Well, I just like to say that publicly.

Yeah, I graded a disagree. In he a month. I graded a disagree. I think what's great about the story is that he he castrated himself and then he went to his church, his prayer house, I believe, said some prayers and then went and had a nice dinner and then went to the doctor to seek medical attention for his open wound where he castrated himself. I wonder what dinner is the right pairing for having just removed one's testicles. It's for better than me to say, I myself would only let a seasoned medical professional

remove these testicles. Only the best. Suffice it to say. a seasoned medical professional remove these testicles. Only the best. Suffice it to say. Well, and also think about it. Your Boston Corbett killed the man who killed Lincoln. Who's gonna challenge you on your manhood? Hey, I killed John Wilkes Booth.

You can't make jokes at my expense. The matter that I remove my own testicles. A lot of, John Wilkes Booth actually made fun of him. It's a matter that I remove my own testicles. A lot of John Moxby's actually made fun of him. That's a little odd. Oh, that's why it happened. No, it happened to be like you. Oh, yeah. Hidden history.

Yeah. Hidden history. Our new podcast, where I lie, Insanian Ables. I hope you had a stake or just something really decadent. Oh, Justin, I'm sorry, that's my page you're going off. Oh, oh yeah, go ahead, go for it. Well, wait. Okay, I'll be back.

Hey, it's me Jesse. Max Funcon is MaximumFund.org's annual gathering of friends in the mountains above Los Angeles. Join us this spring for comedy, classes, talks, and parties with your new best pals. Tickets for the 2014 edition go on sale Friday, November 29th, and to be honest, we cannot add any more bed capacity, so expect it to sell out quick. Head to maxfuncon.com, the day after Thanksgiving, to grab yours.

Okay, sorry, I'm back. Oh, no problem, is everything okay? Yeah, just try to avoid using any, you know what band-aids are? Yeah. Stay away from those, definitely just stay away. Just for the next two to three years. Who's next on our list, Ed?

So next, I wanna continue with our non-medical personnel who performed surgeries on themselves. Johannes Lathias is one of my favorites. We're going way, way back to 1620. Johannes removed his own bladder stone. Those can be unpleasant. I know that now, okay, can I ask you a question and you promised not to make fun of me? Is that different than a kidney stone?

It's just in a different place. The bladder. Same idea. Okay. You know, Griffin used to get kidney stones. I know. They're very painful. Oh boy, he did not like them. They're very painful and so are bladder stones.

Now, he went to the doctor like a woozy. He didn't have the guts. Despite my encouragement, he did not have the guts to remove it himself. Well, he's a was, unlike Johannes. Tell me what's good. Who, he decided, you know, this bladderstone is driving me crazy. He could feel it because it was that big.

And so he decided that he was just gonna take it out himself. Before he did it, he did ask his wife to go to the fish market. Well, he just didn't want to round. Okay, he's just trying to get her out of the house. That was what passed for fun in those days. Yeah, why did you hit the fish market? No, no. Okay.

Thanks, Johannes. Here's two pets. Go treat yourself to a nice hat. He just got his brother to help him. So see, Griffin could have just called you up, gotten some help. See, and what he did is he told his brother, so if you'll just pull aside my scrotum real quick, um, you know, family connections can run really deep. There are, there are very few things I wouldn't do for my brothers. Uh, but the moment I hear the words, just pull

aside my scrotum, slip past their list, we'll focus on the nearest greyhound back to Huntington. Get wrong, Dean. He, in the meantime, grabbed the stone kind of through the perineum. You know what that is? That's the area. That's the tank. I'll tell you that word. That's the tank.

That's that area there. That's the area. That's the tank. Oh, I'll use that word. That's the tank. That's that area there. That's the tank. He grabbed that and just used a knife that he had gotten, that he'd prepared somehow, gotten clean in some way, in some manner. After what his story had to agree, was at least six to eight hours of sharpening.

No, no, no, no, no, no, not quite yet. A little more, little sharper. Just a little sharper sequence. We're ready to go. He completely sharpened out of existence three knives. We're finally, finally, finally on this one. No, no, no, no, no, that one broke. I whittled it into infinity.

They knew knives. Gosh, it's nice, huh? no, no, no, that would break. I will live in new infinity, new, nice. Gosh, it's nice, huh? Don't make them what they used to. So he made an incision in his perineum, and the way it is described, all of this is described by Dr. Nicolayus Tope who wrote down like accounts of different kind of medical oddities at the time.

And the way he describes what he did next, so he made an incision, and then by standing again and again, managed to make the wound long enough to allow the stone to pass, I try to work out those mechanics in your head. Because I can't. No, I don't care who is, I can have 40 belly blanks encouraging me to do those particular calisthenics, and I still don't think they would have the desired effect. He eventually had to reach in and actually remove the stone.

Just put his fingers up there and pull it out. Just go for it. Sported the whole thing. Thank goodness at that point, he actually got someone who knew something about medicine involved called someone for help because he had a big hole where it shouldn't be. Well, it's singers got stuck. He wanted to. And it healed up actually pretty nicely and he survived his his bizarre procedure. See, we were alive on doctors so frequently. But little did you know we really really need

this capital. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. This was a four centimeter stone, too. Pretty big. Woff. Deborah Samson is a pretty cool character. She's from 1782. A member of the Continental Army posing as a man. Wow, cool. Yeah.

And she fought bravely, took two musket balls to the thigh. And her comrades started carrying balls to the thigh and her comrades started you know carrying her to the hospital you know because she has she'd been shot in the thigh but she was adamant she didn't want to go because she knew she'd be discovered so they managed to get her to the hospital where she took off and ran away limped away rushed away but escaped and then dug one of the two balls out Limped away. Rusted away. It was not run away. Not run away. Not run away. But escaped and then dug one of the two balls out of her own thigh to avoid being found out as a woman.

The other one remained there and she had a limp all her life. Deborah Samson, you are the coolest person that has ever been alive. Pretty awesome. Pretty awesome, Deborah Samson. I think you are at that point can't you just I would think that they would not make a big fuss. But don't you think that she could have you know what shame on you Deborah. I think if you had just owned up to say, yeah, I'm a woman and I've got two musket balls in my leg. So who is tough now? And I am

going to take them out myself watch me you know what I actually think is sad is I think she was actually wounded again later and then they did find her out she you know was in a condition where she couldn't hide it and she was taken in for medical attention they figured out she was woman and she was discharged from the army unfortunately yeah well unfortunately yes but let's just assume that Deb read despite her apparent real thirst to kill people and defend this great country, maybe was through with the whole enterprise at that point, right? I mean, she

had probably had her fill of warfare. I know I would have. I can have a musket ball within a football field range of me and be pretty much done with war. Maybe Deborah was ready for a break. Let's tell the story that way. Yeah, let's go with that. You know what? You're ending. You know what? I'm going home. War is dumb.

I don't want any of that. War is dumb and I got shot. I got shot three times now. And you're biggest and you know what? Your biggest issues that I'm that I'm a woman. So I'm over there. Shame, you know what? Shame on you. Shame on all of you. Shame on all of you. So I'm over there. You know what, shame on you.

Shame on all of you. Shame on all of you. Take a long hard look. Think about what you're doing. So before I tell you about my favorite doctor, David Tennant. Well, that should be everyone's favorite doctor clearly, but my favorite doctor who performed surgery on himself,

which hopefully David Tennant hasn't. Look at David. David, please, please, Sidney's asking. In the 1970s, there's a patient that I want to talk to you about first, who could not control his libido and would perform many acts of of owninism, if you get my drift. And in an effort to control that, he all- Maxivation.

Thank you, Justin. My pleasure. He removed both of his testicles, similar to our previous patient. But this wasn't enough. He still found that he had the desire, you know, the sexual desire persisted. So he actually attempted a procedure where he was...

One would assume there was a law. Yeah, for at least a few days. I would think. He actually attempted to cut the nervous and put the denervate, so cut the nerves to his own adrenal glands, Because he thought they were releasing the hormones that were causing the problems. Accurate. This is so much more complicated than that. Yeah, there's a lot of, there's a lot going on here.

Yeah, no kidding. But I think it's pretty fascinating. He actually read a lot of surgical texts and anatomy books to try to figure out how he could, I mean, not remove his adrenal glands. He wanted to go in and just cut the nervous input to them, which is kind of fascinating. Yeah, I mean, I guess he was directed. Luckily, he was, he was, he was, he couldn't complete the procedure.

He called the MS. He got help and he also got psychiatric help at the same time. Thank goodness. Hey, listen, I think it was the right call. I want to tell you about, lastly, my favorite doctor who did not only do one surgery on himself, but actually did three. Okay. Dr. Evan O'Neill Cain lived from 1861 to 1932. That's right.

Well, that's not far off. He was a surgeon from Pennsylvania. And he was actually a pretty cool guy overall. He opened his own hospital. He was at the time there were railway surgeons, which you could think of as similar. That's a euphemism for robots, right? No.

Like, you know, like a flight surgeon or somebody who, OK. So I mean, you think about, at the time, there would be these long trips by railway. And you needed somebody who could perform procedures and stuff. You could always want to get into the nearest town. So that's pretty cool. He was a railway surgeon. So he did some like kind of neat trauma stuff. It could always be to get into the nearest town. So that's pretty cool.

He was a real waste surgeon. So he did some like kind of neat trauma stuff. He created ways to administer IV fluids faster. Well, not IV fluids. I should say administer fluids faster. It's hard to get an IV started. So he would put them through the skin into the subcutaneous tissue. Especially on a train.

Well, that exactly. And that wasn't the best way to give somebody fluids, but it worked in a pinch. And he started using music therapy in the operating room to calm patients down, which actually there is some basis for. All right, let's get to the cutting. He also once, his own finger became infected. And he knew that it was the kind of infection

that could become life threatening. So he just went ahead and am knew that it was the kind of infection that could become life threatening. So he just went ahead and amputated it himself. This is the problem with being a railway doctor. There's nobody, it's not like they have a backup. It's not like there's another one. So he took care of it on his own. Stop the train. We can't.

We're busy. Cut your finger off. Cut your finger off. We're in a rush. Like, look outside of you. Kansas City is right there. Please stop the train. I'm sorry, so you're just gonna have to cut that finger off.

So it's gonna have to come off. Could you do it in the other row? We've got a schedule. That's gonna bleed. We've got a schedule to keep. So he amputated his own finger, which in and of itself is not the craziest of surgeries, but he didn't stop there.

He was intrigued by this idea that, I mean, I'm independent. I don't need help from anybody. I can do surgery on myself. Very Beyonce. Okay. So at the age of 60, he went into the hospital with symptoms that he knew were an appendicitis. He, while waiting for the OR to be ready and the surgeon to come tend to him, thought, you know what, we could do this with local anesthetic. They don't need to put me to sleep. We use ether too much.

We need to stop using so much that I'm just going to do this myself. It's a weird time to take that stand, really. You should really have that figured out before you get into the OR. So they took him back to the OR and he got all prepped and he had assistance and he was in an operating room and everything. He had a surgeon standing by to help out should things go awry and he removed his own appendix. Okay. That's all right.

You're right. That's pretty well. But that wasn't enough. He's not that. That was not enough. Not for not for doc Evan He decided at the age of 70 when he had an Inguinal hernia that he needed repaired it he had sustained an injury. I believe while riding a horse and

It had bugged him for a few months and he thought you know what I can fix this This is a little riskier procedure Because of its proximity to the femoral artery. You don't want to cut that. So it took him an hour and 55 minutes. Good, take your time. But he repaired his own hernia. He used again, only local anesthetic.

And at the very end, he began to kind of drift off with just like the last couple stitches left to go. And so another surgeon had to jump in and help out. But what was interesting about it is that like I said, not a normal guy, one of the things he liked to do to patients when he finished up a surgery was stitch his initial into their skin as he closed. What, so they just had a K there? No, he knew that patients probably wouldn't like that.

So he stitched a K and Morse code onto his patients. Ha, ha, ha, ha. The Banksy of his time. So that was what actually at the very end of his own self-surgery. He couldn't finish the the K the Morse code K At the end of his his herniary repair now. It's worth noting everybody at home that Dr. Evan O'Neill Cain lived, he did this surgery when he was 70 at the most.

He lived to be 71. So maybe it didn't go super hot. To be fair, he did develop pneumonia after the surgery. And the surgery for that is a tough guy. No, but I think it's pretty amazing that he did these, you know, it's nice to know for me personally that, you know, maybe I could do my own hernia repair. What do you think? Sydney Realtalk.

Realtalk now. Forget about the appendicitis that you put to append the salt for. Right. Because that fixed that. That came over the wire recently. That's permanent, a permanent fix for a appendicitis. What would it take for you to actually do? You would, you, I, you're like the toughest person I know,

you probably would be interested in doing this, this to yourself, right? I think I would. I think that, um, I would be pretty hesitant in, you know, living in an area where I can easily get to a hospital and a surgeon. Should I need one? Because if you die in that scenario, you're a goofball.

Right. Right. But if I were in a situation where I had no help, I mean, I certainly, you know, people all the time removed their own stitches and staples and that kind of stuff after surgical procedure. That actually happened to me when I lost my fingernail. I lost the stitches that came out when the fingernail got caught on a carpet.

That was pretty traumatizing. I mean, I guess you didn't include me on the list, but I mean, I guess maybe I belong there. I think I would do some minor procedures, like a sister removal maybe, or like if I had something to cut open and drain, I could see a scenario where I would pull my own tooth out maybe. Would you be more like, okay, that's weird. That's weird.

The end of the tie it to a doorknob. Here's my question. Would you, then to be honest, would you be more open to doing surgery on yourself or me? Oh, on you. Great. Well, I could see what I was doing much easier. Fantastic. to doing surgery on yourself or me. Oh, on you. Great. I could see what I was doing much easier. Fantastic.

Wonderful. You don't want me to go to the hospital? I'll just go to the hospital. Well, when it's necessary, I mean, you know, a lot of the things we didn't talk about, you're okay, you got a bloodlust apparently. No, I'm just saying. I get to cheat me out on the table.

There are a lot of cases of people who have limbs trapped under things and have to amputate them themselves, or like that whole movie about it. And as you're all 100 to 7 hours on me. Yeah, what I'm saying is that when you have to do it, you do it. How about you do me a favor? And if you're with me, you just go ahead and call somebody.

Could you do that? Could you just call somebody? Well, I'll call somebody, but in the meantime, maybe somebody needs to take action. And I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I've got the guts to do it. We hope you have the guts to join us for another episode of sawbounds. We're here every Friday and we hope you have enjoyed listening to the show half as much as we enjoy making it. Thank you to people tweeting about the show like show Klein Leah Sarah Ann Michelle Lambing Steve Kim Matt Pasquale Ian Kelly Matt Armstrong, Benjamin Reed Frank Conan N I guess

Mary to the favor Claire Bear Paul Matthew Page so many of you are tweeting about the show and gosh do we ever appreciate it that's our only way of getting the word out so please please please tweet about the show, use the at solbons, not the beginning, because then everybody doesn't see it. But give us a review on iTunes if you can. That would be amazing. Oh yeah, and thank you so much for all the nice reviews,

all the people who say they listen to our show who are playing it to their classes, like school classes, I'll try to keep them factual. I'll do my best. Thank you to everyone reviewing. There's so many reviews. You guys are really, really the best. Holly Cal, Salamanda, enjoy the science,

White Gunpowder, Epona 158, Supernatural 920, Alexa Nanby. Thank you so much to folks tweeting that are reviewing the show on iTunes that is another huge help to us. You can tweet at us too by the way at Justin McAroy. And she's at Sydney McAroy, S-Y-D-N-E-E. And we're at Saul Bones if you want to tweet to us. And we are a part of the maximum fun network There's so many other shows you can go there and enjoy it like stop podcasting yourself judge John Hodgman win man

Pal one bad mother Jordan Jesse go my brother my brother and me stop podcasting yourself so many others It's a wonderful network. We're so pleased to be a part of it. We're most of all we're pleased to be part of your lives for a half Every week so Please do a part of it. It must be all or please to be part of your lives for a half every week. So Thank you so much. Don't know if we're gonna have a show next week. That's that's a question that we're still Trying to figure out. We're gonna do our best. We're gonna be can we say we're gonna be? Uh, yeah, we're gonna be at the the the the the doctor who 50th anniversary celebration in London. Oh god We can't wait like the nervous. Oh excited But we got family stand or a house, so don't even try it. We're on the... Don't even try to break in.

And we have two giant cats. We have guard cats and it's a curious system. So shhh, stuff. And that's gonna do a rest on sawman's. Until we see you next Friday, or in Friday after that. Possibly, I'm just macaroid. I'm Sydney Macaroid. Don't chew a hole.

You're a head. after that possibly I'm just macaroid I'm Sydney macaroid is always don't true a whole your head Alright! Maximumfund.org Comedy and Culture, Artistone, Listener Supported