Segments - 484: Antisocial Distance (w/Avital Ash!)
Episode Date: April 19, 2021Actor/Writer/Lover Avital Ash joins us to discuss nicknames, whistling, and her new web series, Antisocial Distance!Advertise on If I Were You via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https:...//art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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This is a HeadGum Original.
Hey, I'm Jake Johnson, host of the podcast, We're Here to Help.
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Get 15% off your first Brooklinen order and save extra when you bundle. Tommy is just a friend of mine
He's liquid and nice, I'm on his mind
I write to ask him about a ring
He tells me what to do with my ex's bling
If I were you, Here's what I would do if I were you.
Here's what I would do.
Ooh, groovy.
Cat Stevens chic.
Very mellow.
I love that.
I'll be tall as crying.
Oh my God.
It's so moving.
No, it's probably something,
it must've been something you did earlier.
I've never made you cry like that.
No, you don't say anything beautiful.
Damn.
Shout out to Lucas who wrote that song.
Great album.
That was by a band called Sven in Canada.
Actually, it was by Lucas and him and his roommates have a band called Sven in Canada.
That's a good band name.
Yeah, Sven.
It also sounds like a made up boyfriend you have is Sven in Canada. That's a good band name. Yeah, Sven. It also sounds like a made-up boyfriend you have is Sven
in Canada.
Here's a photo of him, but it's
only from a magazine because Sven
is a model. It's the only one I have.
It is fun to say
Sven, the S into the V.
We don't get that in English.
Yeah, Sven. It's good.
Alrighty, Sven. Nice.
Very good. I coached her through that joke. Sven. It's good. All righty, Sven. Nice. I hate myself.
Very good.
I coached her through that joke.
We spent three hours cracking that.
It was crisp.
Yeah.
All right.
So it's Jim Carrey in Sweden.
He goes around sort of saying, all righty, Sven.
If you want to listen to more Sven, it's svenband.bandcamp.com.
Okay.
Huge J&A fans, and they're marathoning the whole series.
They're on complete viewing number 27 now.
Holy shit.
Whoa.
And what's J&A?
Is that Jillian and Avital?
Holy shit.
I never really thought about that.
That's interesting.
What else can it be?
We both found another A and another J.
That's how self-centered we are it
really would be better if i was with not this exact avital and you were with i'm not proposed
well you know actually fine i would swing yeah i mean you were gonna go seek out another avital
well i didn't know if it would be more offensive to suggest the trade the trade not a trade not a trade switch yeah no not even a
switch now i'm nervous i do think that i'm more the jake and jillian is more the amir so like it
all makes sense we're balanced yeah we found the personality balance yeah for sure avital and i
would be a destructive force with the universe i agree yeah you guys
suck and then amir and jillian would be like very peaceful yeah that sounds fine but bored
probably bored not really bored yeah let's say me and avital would soaring i feel like we would be
me and avital would be a power couple it would just with anyone even yeah i feel like you and jill
would kind of probably be single if you and her were together because she would put up with your
shit you mean single why are you trying to hit on jill this is so fucked up yeah what are you doing
you brought up swinging it's written on your palm that's the only note you brought yeah sven and swinging swinging nice it really came out swinging
a lot of nice can you tell we live together and haven't been apart for a year and a half straight
we share a brain now yeah it's awful it used to be with jake we used to live together and just
make the same jokes back and forth to each other yeah staring into a mirror now it's awful it used to be with jake we used to live together and just make the same jokes back
and forth through each other yeah staring into a mirror now it's me and you living together making
jokes saying nice then another joke saying nice then until we fall asleep wake up repeat the
process also uh there was something this morning now i'll sometimes like lip something because i
think he's gonna say it so he's like what was that i'm like oh it's what i thought you were
gonna say like i don't want to say it because i think it's annoying but i want
him to know that i was aware that he was gonna say it right yeah what was the one this morning
do you remember it was like 10 minutes ago yeah i said huge and then or you said huge if true
if true i was waiting for him oh yeah true there we go great do you have any jokes that you usually say with your lover with jill
yeah if not that's okay do you guys have nicknames did i already ask you that okay two answers i do
have we have like kind of pet names we just say jay so like i'll say jay and she'll say jay because
both of our names start with jay you do you guys ever that? It's cute and uncreative. Yeah, we'll say Jay too. Hey Jay.
A really bad dumb couple joke that we do is
often like whatever we cooked, I'll say that it
tastes a lot like the exact food. Like if Jill makes
like a bean stew, I'll be like, this is really beany.
That's not really a joke, but it's a cute thing to do.
Well, let us decide if it's cute, because you don't get to say that.
I don't know if it's cute to say beanie.
What about if a punch-up instead was like, oh, this tastes just like bean stew, as if
it's like an imitation.
Actually, tell us all your couples jokes couples jokes we'll sort of punch it up
yeah we'll make it a little bit better um yeah sure thing uh let me see the j thing works sometimes
yeah if i sometimes if i fart i have a reaction that i think jill is gonna have so i'll fart and
i'll be like come on oh that's good stop it that's really gross gross i didn't remember this but amir told
me this morning that in the middle of the night he farted and it woke me up and i was like what
was that did you hear that like i thought someone was in the house and wait what did you did it wake
you up the fart or did you fart and you were awake and uh i think i was like half like rolling over
i'm like oh i have to fart i fart avital goes oh my god you hear that i was like half like rolling over I'm like oh I have to fart I fart Avital goes
oh my god did you hear that
I was like yeah
I tooted
Jay
you can't
I mean that's like literally stealing the nickname
it's not even stealing like the
the essence of it
well my middle name is Jay so it sort of makes sense
oh interesting she was named after the critic Jay Sherman so that's why the essence of it. Well, my middle name is J-J-A-Y, so it sort of makes sense.
Oh, interesting.
She was named after the critic,
Jay Sherman,
so that's why it was middle name Jay.
Jay Buhner, the baseball player.
But Jay is cute.
Do you think it's like J period or like J-A-Y?
Just J.
Oh, I guess,
I feel like it's from our,
I think it's a holdover,
or it's like inspired
from our wedding invites, which were like, I wrote a capital J and Jill wrote a lowercase J. And that was like our little, like, I don't know, art on the invite or something.
You wrote the capital J? Did you notice that?
I was just about to say, she's like subservient to you.
I couldn't stop thinking about that. The capital, how you're the capital J.
And she's diminutive.
She's a little, she's a lowercase J.
Yeah, and she's cursive. She's a little, she's a lowercase J.
And she's cursive.
She shrinks around you.
That was not the intention or the implication,
but looking back on it now, it feels right.
That's funny because she said she was the uppercase J.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Interesting.
And yeah, she tried to write, she wrote an uppercase J,
but I swapped it when I sent it to the printer. She said you were a lowercase R.
Really?
Yeah, for radish.
You're a little radish man.
For like a tiny little Ralph, because it makes her want a Ralph when she looks at me.
Yeah.
We don't have nicknames for each other, if you were wondering.
Well, that's because you guys aren't married yet, or you're not even in, like, unless.
It comes with a wedding.
Is that why we had Avital on this show no he's proposing oh my god get down on my knees do it right get down on the
knee i don't have i'm not prepared for this i didn't plan sharing earbuds so if he tries to
get on his knees it'll come down okay all right so i guess that's the only reason that the proposal might be put on hold first of all you want to swing like
let me call let me call jay in here oh my god she has a ring she has streamers she has confetti and
rice we haven't even started the show yet jesus what's the next 48 minutes like if it starts with
that i changed my wedding i don't think i want. Planning the wedding. I don't think I want
to go through with it. I don't think I'm ready.
This is based on
gotcha journalism. He brought it up.
He set us up. I'm sorry.
You must be so disappointed.
But I just think it's
sort of jumping the gun a little bit. Yeah.
I mean, I didn't want to do anything. What?
Not that I didn't want to do anything. It feels like
Avital is the capital A in your relationship.
Now I'm a lowercase j.
That makes sense because we're on the same frequency.
Big J and big A over here.
Big A.
That's a good nickname for you.
Big A energy.
Energy.
I have it.
We are breaking up for sure after this conversation.
Yeah, but wait for the end.
That way people stay on the hook
until the end of the episode for the big breakup.
Yeah.
All right, this is If I Were You, an advice show.
After all, I know you don't listen to it,
but basically how it works,
it's the only advice show on the internet
hosted by me and Jake,
so we take it very seriously.
Okay, that makes sense.
That's right, yeah.
We do our best to comb through our email
for the best questions from real people,
but we need to give them fake names in order to preserve their anonymity.
We don't usually dick around this long.
We usually get right into it, too.
No, no.
That's the opposite of true.
Where does this link?
This is actually, we're 10 minutes in.
This is earlier than average.
Fuck.
That means I was boring.
I'm a regular amir now it sucks
you're so bad you're as bad as me yeah i'm like our boring partners right jake
fuck oh fucking a jill didn't sign up for this i can she's not here to defend herself
no but she's you know i feel like there's something that comes with being Zen.
A Zen Sven.
Yeah.
And like there's an equilibrium that is calming, but not exciting always.
She's reached Sven.
Yeah.
There's a chaos that we bring.
Yeah.
Right.
No, yeah. She's even keel.
We're fucking, we're the storm.
Yeah, exactly.
I'm even keel and you're eating kale
if that makes sense it doesn't it feels like even kale people would be eating the kale
all right this is from a dude who's kind of a stoner type so we need to give him a
dude's name that's like a stoner dude what do you got dylan that's. That's actually a hot person's name. Okay. Last name? Cool. That's really cool,
actually. Dylan Cool. How cool is that? Yeah. Hey, guys, Dylan Cool here. I'm a big fan and
I need your advice. I'm 26 years old and only started using pot. He's just not cool anymore.
He said using pot. I started using pot in the last 18 months.
Obviously, weed is awesome.
Oh, maybe he's kind of cool again.
And I personally prefer to alcohol to the point where I almost have entirely stopped
drinking in favor of a pot infused edible one to two times per week.
I enjoy the feeling more and I don't have to deal with hangovers and it's cheap as well.
My issue is that the munchies have led me to my waistline expanding.
I've always eaten too much food when I'm high and I want to lose weight.
My question is how can I avoid getting the munchies while high?
I love that this is the question you chose for me because, well,
I don't know if you chose it for me, but I am,
I do feel like it makes me cool that I've been using drugs since an early age,
even though now that I'm in my 30s, it's arguably sad.
And you're like, oh, I started smoking weed at 14.
I was so cool.
Yeah.
You were young.
My parents didn't care about me.
Yeah.
12, 13?
Those are two very different ages.
I was 14 as young as 12 is like.
You were 8.
I was negative 3.
I had cocaine in utero.
My dad is a weed plant.
I think it was 13 or 14.
It was eighth grade.
And I think I was 14 in eighth grade.
Now, this really sounds like I'm just trying to one-up you.
But truly, it was for me, the first time was the summer between seventh and eighth grade.
Wow.
There you go.
There you go.
Yeah, I don't know how old you are then.
11, 12.
Did you also do it at your friend Tom's house?
At what?
Your friend Tom's house.
Oh, no, I didn't.
I remember the house, but I don't know whose it was.
We were outside.
You were that high.
Yeah.
What was your first apparatus that you smoked out of?
The very first one was a joint.
I did a crushed Coke can with like, like you know you poke the holes in it
and oh my god the stuff we used to it's so weird because like the easiest and kind i i guess kind
of the best thing to smoke out of is like a joint or something or a bong because it's hard to get
high the first time oh my god but i've since since smoking like i think amir and i were on tour once
and we were like at a frat party and i took a hit out of a bong to try to like you know be as cool
as the frat dudes and it absolutely destroyed me i like picked my head up and i was like i have to
go home bye i felt cool this is again this is so sad that this is like my high school understanding
of what it is to be cool.
Like, I'm cool, guys.
But my little brother told me
that he has one friend
who thinks I'm the coolest ever
because one time they were smoking
out of a bong on the side of the house
and I came and like cleared it
like it was nothing and then left
and his friend was like,
no girl has ever cleared the Green Goblin before.
The Green Goblin. The first woman to clear the Green Goblin before. The Green Goblin.
I'm the first woman to clear the Green Goblin.
Do you know who I am?
I think like 14 and 12 sounds young,
but then I imagine my nieces getting high
and it's like, that's absurd.
You might as well be like a little child
at that age getting high.
So I don't understand what,
like your parents were probably just as strict as my parents. were more yours were less and i was too afraid to smoke
up until like age 20 like why why did it take for me and you guys were like whatever because
jake and i are chaos and you're serene yeah i mean it's not like my dad was like a police officer
and if he ever caught me smoking he was just like a fun loving guy.
But like, I don't know if I watched like an episode of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles growing up at age like four that like really cemented or like a Saved by the Bell with the roach that Johnny Dakota had in the bathroom.
He's like, what the hell is this?
When Slater finds it, he's like, this is a roach.
Were you offered weed?
It's like, so that's something that nobody likes to smoke either. Were you offered weed it's like so that's something that nobody likes to smoke either
were you offered
weed like when was the earliest you were offered
and rejected weed
the first time I saw weed I was
at a party in between
9th and 10th grade like
which I thought was like holy shit
this is really early on
but it was still later way too soon guys
exactly i'm like what the fuck are you guys doing resist drugs now like we're 15 you're getting high
don't you realize what's gonna happen you saw the fucking same by the bell episode you lose
things you lose it all you lose control i did turn down weed believe it or not before that
loser wow so it was offered to me early like on
the beach in miami wow yeah no i i accepted it as soon as it was offered yeah but i don't i don't
i i vaguely remember like going there being like i think i'm going to smoke weed but i shouldn't
and i'm going to say no but then it's like there I'm just like I have to so like I succumbed to peer pressure very early I really wanted to do mushrooms and was going to this party
and they were supposed to be mushrooms this is again between seventh and eighth grade and they
were out god everybody ate all the mushrooms and so my consolation prize was like I guess I'll smoke
weed so you hadn't smoked weed yet and then you wanted to try mushrooms. Yeah, that was my number one.
That's like really deep diving.
That's going in.
I mean, hallucinogenics, man.
You also shot someone.
She shot someone in junior high with a fucking gun.
Jesus Christ.
What else would I shoot them with?
That was crazy.
You're so cool.
Thank you.
I spent most of my life in jail, but I am cool.
So to come back to the question, do you guys get the munchies?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
I guess I, for the most part now, I don't think I, I don't smoke weed at all.
Loser.
We got him.
He admitted it. and we got him anything i sometimes smoke weed when i'm already drunk so it doesn't feel like i'm
feeling the effects it feels more like i'm evening out the effects of alcohol or something though
that i'm sure is not true um but i got munchies more when i was in high school and college yeah
since then i have not gotten the munchies you don't get it when you drink and then smoke i feel
like then you're really getting munchies
because you're like, or you just pass out.
Yeah, I guess I get munchies.
I like, when I drink a lot,
I like want to eat a lot at the end of the night for sure.
And I also want to eat a lot the next day when I'm hungover
because I'm like, I can't really eat
and then I want to have an insane lunch.
So I guess for this guy, I feel almost like
your munchies are just like you want to eat food.
And if anything, it's better that you're eating food when you're only high than when you're drunk.
Because if you're doing that, then it's like calories on calories.
That's true.
So I feel like this thing that you're doing is, you know, net fine.
You could maybe prepare yourself some healthy snacks ahead of time.
Who's the nerd now? Actually, some peanut butter on cucumbers will go a long way to have the
munchies. You can have some carrots and sonalong. Like, you don't fucking get it. We want chips,
dude. That was genuinely going to be my advice because everything tastes good when you're high.
Even a rice cracker with some cottage cheese.
Honestly, a rice cracker sounds great to me right now.
I'm also starving.
I have not.
I like ate a really dumb lunch today.
Yeah, you did have to delay this podcast recording
because you said you made an egg.
Yeah, there's no food in the house right now.
Oh no.
That's the other thing is don't have,
if you're trying to not,
you're going to get munchies when you get high.
I don't think there's like a workaround for that.
But just don't have sweets in the house, which is something that I have to do sober because I will eat it all.
I think that's I think knowing having some healthy like know that you want to eat.
You don't have to be like, I'm not going to eat like you'll eat.
You're going to eat something.
So prep that ahead of time like get healthier
snacks to have in your house or like have a go-to restaurant that you order from that uh that has
something that's like slightly healthier than yeah or shoot up heroin so you're you have something
sort of that's an appetite suppressant to balance out oh my god that's you are cool
getting cooler and cooler actually what was your go-to munchie
when you were younger?
On the corner
right near where I grew up there was a combo
Dunkin' Donuts,
Subway, and
fuck, what was the third?
Baskin Robbins. I can't believe it. That should have been the number one.
All in the same spot in the corner.
So that was like the go-to, whatever you're in the mood for.
Yeah, that sounds good. Yeah, I would go there and get like a vegan wrap or something from subway i
would be so high baked lanes you said you didn't smoke till you were 20 so that's like
you're that's like what is it junior year of college yeah i actually have a funny story the
first time i don't know if i've told this before. The first time I got high was my high school friends always wanted me to get high because
I never got high.
And they're like, you'd be so funny.
It would be so great.
Just promise me you'll be there.
And then like one time, I think it was New Year's.
We went to my buddy Jesse's like frat party and I was drunk enough that I told him like,
I think if you guys get weed, I would smoke it right now and they're like holy shit we gotta go and it was ofra who found it or we went frat party
no we went to frat house to frat house asking them for drugs he's like you don't understand
this guy's never gotten high and i guess it was like it's a sting up yeah exactly they're like
all right dude like this is dry week so we're not actually like supposed to i guess it's a sting operation. Yeah, exactly. They're like, all right, dude, like this is dry week. So we're not actually like supposed to, I guess it's weird that they had a dry week.
It seemed like everything should be like no drugs and no alcohol.
But for whatever reason, this was specifically a dry week on campus or something.
So nobody wanted to let us in except for this one cool frat house.
They're like, if you've really never gotten high, you can come in here and get high with us.
And so Ofer taught me how to smoke in front of these frat dudes that i'd never met
before at usc and then we played poker with them because they played poker and so did we
and i the way it manifested itself with me is that i couldn't not verbalize every thought i had so as
i was playing poker i'm like this guy's king i was like, I'm like, this guy is king nine. I was like, wrong. But I was like, this guy is king nine.
I bet he has jack ten.
Watch this.
I'm going to push them all in.
They're like, dude, you got to stop talking.
Otherwise, we can't play with you.
You're being too annoying for us to play with.
And then Oprah had to apologize on my behalf.
We left.
Oh, my God.
We went back to Jesse's apartment.
And I experienced the munchies by eating raw onions.
I'm like, these taste so good.
Oh, my God.
It was like diced onions, and he's like, we should put them in an omelet.
I'm like, oh, my God, that's the best idea ever.
And we made like, it was like 4.14 in the morning.
We made omelets with diced onions, and it was like, oh, my God,
this is the best thing ever.
And he's like, this is what I'm telling you.
Like, how good is weed that you're having an onion omelet and it tastes this good to this day i hate you wait i hate you
for that me jake yeah what the hell did i have nothing i just enjoyed the story i feel like you
put it in the ether or something you made me tell it i should have i should have ofra and jesse
corroborate those details but that's as as i remember it i think jesse's told me that story
also so i've i know at least i remember i the onion omelet thing was new but i knew that you
like were they took you frat house to frat house asking for drugs yeah and it was it sounded really
heartwarming at first like the fact that it was like a Revenge of the Nerds thing coming together, these tiny little Jewish tweens
hanging out with frat dudes.
It does explain a lot.
Yeah, but then I guess you did get kicked out
for playing cards bad.
It actually sounds a little bit like when we played Mafia
and you weren't high.
That's sort of just how you behave.
Yeah, I tell that story here too,
where I was kicked out of a game night for playing Mafia.
Good times. Let's take a break
and come back and answer more questions
after these messages.
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That'd be great. Is that available?
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Interesting. Freaky Tuesday. So that's when like you run into each other and
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Right. Mostly you're just concussed.
Yeah, which is new.
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Yeah.
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Sorry, I have to spell it out for some people.
Yeah, you do.
And we're back.
Hey, Avital Ash, do you have any?
Oh, it's a lesson!
Mom, I'm coming!
Gross.
Excuse us.
Yeah, that's an inside joke.
We're in, basically.
My mother catches Jake doing something nefarious.
It's clearly your voice.
I couldn't quite hear it, so I didn't know.
Great unsolicited advice uh people watching
your web series anti-social distance which just came out yeah hey oh yeah so what's what's the
elevator pitch give us like the quick 40 minute pitch for anti-social and actually this would be
nice because you won't fart over this one the last time we had a guest on talking about their project amir ripped ass right
during it yeah what was that i josh rubin was here talking about his film and as he was talking
i muted myself on the zoom and ripped wind and uh i didn't edit it out of the episode so like
the mic still caught it but for you i'll only fart silently during it. Oh my gosh, thank you.
Look at a deadly, silent but deadly.
Perfect.
An SBD.
It's Watch the Web series.
Yeah, that's my unsolicited advice, right?
That's right.
Telling you listeners to watch it at antisocialdistance.com.
It is about a person who is avoiding herself during quarantine at the start of quarantine Passover
2020 and avoiding her partner and desperately trying to find a dog and basically just going
through a version of what we all did which was like anything but facing myself but it's funny
and sad and uh well by the time this comes out, they'll, they'll all be out.
But today, the last batch of episodes comes out.
And yesterday people told me they were crying watching, which maybe is not a good, um, uh,
promo for your audience, but.
No, we all want to feel something.
Right?
Maybe.
So maybe.
I think it's, um, it feels very real.
I think it's good.
Very voyeuristic.
Amir's in it. This is a HeadGum podcast, isn't I think it's good. Very voyeuristic. Amir's in it.
This is a HeadGum podcast, isn't it?
That's right.
Rose is in it.
Jeffrey's in it.
Oh.
Jeffrey's in it.
I didn't realize Rose did the voice for the network.
That's funny.
Yeah, yeah, Rose.
It's actually Rose McIver who does the HeadGum voice.
Yeah.
So she's in it.
Old, old college humor fan favorite, UTK, the INC.
Yeah.
Is in an app.
You have lots of funny people doing like dramedy in it, which is interesting to watch.
Like me and you doing a scene that's not necessarily funny.
Jeffrey doing two episodes that are not necessarily funny.
That are dramatic even.
Do they play, does everyone play themselves?
Or are they like, do you give them names?
Are you like? Yeah, they all have names nobody's playing themselves um cool so no one's playing like i'm a comedian whose show is on hiatus and now i'm here no virtual auditions
the only the only person who plays themself is rabbi david kasher excuse me which is i think very
interesting because a lot of it is also about sort of
religion and like where that factors into this character's life and if it factors in and if it
has a place and and especially because it's very lgbtqia plus and a lot of religions including
the version of judaism that i was raised in uh really frown on anything aside from just heterosexuality.
And so it was complicated,
but interesting to have a real rabbi way
in essentially playing himself.
Very cool.
Where can people find it?
Antisocialdistance.com
or we finally got our vanity YouTube link
if you want to go to youtube.com
slash antisocialdistance.
Nice.
And it's 47 episodes shot over zoom over the last year, edited meticulously,
played out in quasi real time. So it's like eight days. And then there's multiple chapters,
multiple episodes for those eight days. 47 episodes. Jesus, that's epic.
Yeah, thanks. It's a It was a lot of work.
I feel like every time I do anything, it's like if I knew how much work it would be, I wouldn't have done it.
Yeah. Wait, when did you start?
Initially, I started a year ago because I was going to try and release it for Passover last year.
And then I sort of gave up on it. And then I came back.
Sorry. You can edit that out, right? That gross sound.
Men can do it not women but then really in the last few months like knocked most of them out and um there was there's
an episode without giving spoilers but there's an episode with amir that i was like super anxious
doing and that makes me really uncomfortable to watch but hopefully that makes for good tv
yeah yeah i'm gonna watch that one yeah that one comes good TV. Yeah. Is that one out yet? I'm going to watch that one.
Yeah. That one comes out today. I mean, they are, I'll, I'll make an exception for you. You can just
watch that one, but I will strongly suggest my unsolicited advice that you watch in order,
because I think for whatever reason, people are like, oh, these are cute and they're bite-sized.
I'll just jump around. Like even cast members are like, I watched a few. It's so fun. I'm like,
that's not how you're supposed to watch it. Do you watch it, do you turn on the
Sopranos and watch a fucking few? No, I don't think so. And that's how you responded to those
texts, right? Yeah, yeah, 100%. But people who have watched it so far are incredibly moved by it.
The hard part is getting people to watch it. So hopefully, to the sensitive lot, the intelligent
listeners now, watch the first few and see if it
sucks you. And I feel like it will more than it won't. So do check it out. I think it also gets
better as it goes. Like I remember, I mean, I shouldn't be so bold as to compare it to Fleabag,
but I do feel like with Fleabag, you start and you're like, oh, these are fun. This is really
funny. And then as you finish the season, you're like, there's a real narrative arc here that pays
off. So that's, I think what, I mean, that's the feedback we're getting anyway, is like, there have been a few people that were mad that they started watching on time because they're like, now I have to wait.
I wish I could just binge the whole thing.
So I think it is very bingeable because you want to see, hopefully, you want to see where the story is going.
And because I listed all of the head gum people that are in it.
Well, Rose McIver is a beautiful woman, but there are the head gum people that are in it well rose mciver is a
beautiful woman but there are also like a lot of women in it i feel like i should mention too
christina karchner who's on never have i ever right now and he's just a dream to look at and
act with uh and ellington wells who's an up-and-comer and galen swords and yeah you'll
you'll see as you watch but hopefully there's also a lot of cute dogs at the very least.
Oh my gosh.
Basically a runner is that Avital is trying to adopt a dog.
So everyone also has a dog in frame for most of the episodes.
Oh, wow.
Does everyone that you worked with have dogs?
Rose doesn't have a dog.
Well, Rose isn't, there is a whole thing with dog fosters
and she does not play a dog foster.
But a lot of, but all of the dog,
all the people that play dog fosters, we use their real dogs dog foster but a lot of but all of the dog all the people
that play dog fosters we use their real dogs yeah oh god that's awesome i love utk's dog
oh my gosh he's so cute that's disco so the episode is called disco easy to find yeah uh
so yeah check it out at antisocialdistance.com right that's right all right can also go to
passover2020.com which i think gets
confusing to say because why are there two different websites but it's easier to type
that's so passover2020.com so however you want to type it you can find it yeah yeah that's right
uh we actually had a question about um a religious cult not necessarily judaism but something a
little bit more extreme perhaps.
Do you have a fake guy's name to refer to this person as?
Amir Blumenfeld.
Yeah, right.
More like something else.
Charles Manson.
That's good.
Charles Manson from England writes,
My dad and mom have started taking me to these weird cult meetings.
They get together with three other families,
and they all
chant and meditate and speak in tongues it creeps me out and i want to stop going i asked my parents
and they said i had to go what should i do any help would be much appreciated wow speaking in
tongues charles manson is i would hope he's under 18 yeah yeah why would you hope that
because it seems like if he's like 31 and his parents are like, you have to go,
it seems like he has a bigger issue than just the religious cult of it all.
Yeah, I don't know which is worse.
So we assume that he's young, or at the very least living with his parents still.
Right.
Like in a way it's sadder if he's like 40 and living with his parents,
but then it's also like, okay, well, you're living under their roof.
I guess you can do what they tell you to.
And if you're under 18, it's a little like brainwashy to force you to go to these chant meetings.
Really, no matter what, it's a fucked up situation.
Yeah.
It sounds like.
Yeah.
Run away from home.
That's my advice.
Next question.
I mean, it's sort of what you did.
It's kind of true.
What was your, quote, religious cult growing up?
You know, no talking on the phone or turning on lights or touching anything electric on Friday night or Saturday day.
And a lot of rules around what's allowed and why and when.
And don't touch anybody of the opposite sex, especially if you're on your period.
You know, fun stuff like that.
And then what did you do about it? You had to do it while you were growing up, right?
You couldn't say, I'm good, thanks. I'm just going to stay inside and use electricity,
even though I'm 13. I could do it sneakily, but I didn't. I was rebellious in all the other ways.
I liked drugs and just.
Yeah, no, we remember the weed.
I don't know if I told you guys, but I smoked a lot of weed.
I started like between seventh and eighth grade, so pretty young.
No, but I did feel like I wanted my parents to love me.
And the way to do that was to be religious.
So I did, I just sort of did what I was supposed to until I left the house and then had therapy to sort of unlearn the things that i didn't want to be a part of my life anymore right yeah so i
mean it's almost like the advice is i don't know you can stick with it and then stop when you when
you leave if you're young if you're so young or or if you really have to live with them.
But I think, I don't know.
It's really the tongues.
The tongues really alienate people.
Going to a synagogue and praying is close to that.
You go there and you all chant in a different language together.
It's all tongues to me.
Yeah, but for whatever reason, Hebrew is fine to me,
but going like,
feels crazy and bizarre
and scary. I think Hebrew is a little bizarre and scary to me too.
When I see people like davening, like reading the book
really fast and just bowing over and over, I'm like, that's fucking...
It is kind of like speaking in tongues.
That's an actual prayer.
Yeah, yes. I mean, I didn't take god's name in vain i sort of like
sped over that because i don't want to go to hell but um that is roughly it i just remembered now
when it was maybe yom kippur or rosh hashanah or something another example of of like zend out
jillian and amir they were down to go to temple and j Jake and I were like, nope, I will not be doing that.
I stayed home at Amir's parents' house while they went to Temple, and I think you stayed
home at your home in LA at the time.
Yeah, Jill would go to Temple with Amir's mom.
Yeah.
She's the daughter-in-law Rivka never had.
Yeah, even though she also has two other daughters-in-law that does go to Temple with her.
But it's just not the same.
It really needs to be Jillian.
It needs to be Jake's wife, for sure.
It should be Jake's wife.
It has to be.
But I didn't have to go to temple growing up because of the misogyny and Orthodox Judaism is like,
the men had to learn and pray and whatever.
And the women usually, you know, making food and staying home with the kids.
Oh, you're so lucky.
So it worked out in a weird way for you.
In a weird way.
You were,
you were not allowed to be as religious as you would have had to be if you
were a boy.
I,
I,
it wasn't forced to go to the women's section of the synagogue because they
were divided.
Obviously men and women can't sit together.
So I,
yeah,
I stayed home except for like,
you know,
major holidays.
And now I stay home on major holidays and Amir has to go yeah i think yeah we need more information like how old are you if you
if you're six and you have an older sibling like can you live with them yeah it's probably six i
bet it says mommy and daddy don't let me want to talk in tongues can i stay with uncle danny
yeah i do think you just
have to have like many come like this is not there's not an easy solve around this you can't
just like there's not an answer you just have to have many many many conversations with your parents
yeah and also with god like a lot of the times when you realize that jesus suffered and died
for you like the tongues are actually one good way to connect to your Lord. In those conversations, be sure to use
tongues. They can't understand
anything else. Yeah. Actually, can I
bring something up?
Eyes rolling
in the back of your head.
Dad is like, now I understand.
It actually makes me appreciate
being woken up by a fart rather than you
speaking in tongues. I apologized
for that. I said I liked it
I didn't really apologize for it
Alright let's take one more break
And then I want you guys to hash out
TV disagreements that you've had through me
In person
In a bit I'm calling
TV battles
Should they or shouldn't they
Dum dum dum
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All right, we're back.
Jake, you thought Your Honor was one of the worst TV shows
you've ever seen.
Avital, you said it was your favorite.
No, not even close.
I think it was a bad show, but I also think it was more upsettingly bad because it had so much potential.
I think there were elements that were so good, so it was frustrating that it wasn't good.
Okay, I think we actually probably agree.
I think the first the first two
episodes of your honor had a lot of promise yes and i think because it didn't just like
it's not even like it didn't stick the landing it's like it it it slid off the the aircraft
carrier and blew up and then sank into the ocean yes it was It was so, by the end, it was like comically bad to me.
And I think, did you know, I read a fun piece of trivia
or an interesting piece of trivia
that they found out in the middle of shooting
that they were not going to get a second season.
I did not know that.
For me, that explained everything.
It was like, oh, wow, they really like slapdash
put all of this together.
And all the acting is very disappointed.
So it's just like, hey, do you want anything to eat?
And Brian Crane's like, not really.
I mean, what's the fucking point?
We got canceled.
But they kept it in.
Well, they kept saying it was always meant to be one season.
But I guess, yeah, you're going to say that
when you know you've been canceled halfway through.
Yeah.
Or not renewed.
The way it ended, it so clearly was not meant to be one season.
It was like they figured out how to how they could no i don't know spoilers for your honor ahead
i'm gonna give you a five second uh window here to pause if you want to watch your honor
okay so when the when the kid gets shot at the end end, the way that the energy of that is like, they didn't know who they wanted to kill when the gun went off.
And it's like, fucking flip a coin. Like, oh, all right, it's this guy. It's you.
Yeah, it seems like they might have shot the kid shooting wherever. It doesn't seem like he's specifically pointing at anyone.
And then maybe they just filmed multiple deaths and were like like okay we'll slide in whichever one works in post and really
any any one of them would have worked for the ending that they were going for which is just
like kind of a shock yeah and like oh wow there's just so much death i guess the one that they and
i guess killing him i forget his name his name is adam oh yeah good job I forget his name. His name is Adam. Oh, yeah. Good job. You already know his name.
Killing Adam, I guess, is like bookending
both of the sons are dead or something.
Right.
It's poetic justice.
It's like, here's the thing is, again, to me,
it almost works.
Like, not in the way that they did it,
but it could work.
It could be really poignant and effective
and, like, make you feel a bunch of things.
And instead, you're just like, okay, it's over.
I will say that the tension in episode two, thought was like masterful i could i had such
a hard time getting through it i was like this show is amazing and then yeah the first two episodes
were like this is really good i didn't i the show made me anxious which i never really like
but i like i thought that it was still masterful yeah but by the end i was like everyone is so
comically dumb i don't know how many different ways they can like shoehorn all of these random people into like do you remember the
the judge the senator the guy running for mayor the detective and uh the and that like uh civil
rights lawyer all of them uh just like ended up at his house one time.
Right.
For a surprise party.
You're like, oh, that's fucking bananas.
Yes.
And then like two episodes later,
they just all get dinner as if it's a common thing.
Like, why are you hanging out with so many people
when you murdered somebody, dude?
Also, and I don't know if this is like,
if this speaks to your audience at all.
I don't know who's watching your honor,
but this is the last thing. I would set it as like a goof and this is no it's all staying in
but just the idea that the the car is involved in a hit and run and then the judge the presiding
judge it's his car that belonged to his dead wife you wouldn't be allowed to preside over that case
you're obviously emotionally invested like this is insane and the entire even like him doing like him calling in the
car stolen was so fucking stupid like just wait till it's you're like the plan is the car stole
and it goes to the junkyard it gets destroyed then you call it in as missing right i feel left out i feel left out what's your favorite
jake and amir this one this one right that's really sweet of you to say that's i would say
i'm looking at the zoom and that's probably my favorite jake and then my favorite amir would be
oh no i meant the oh cohen the show amir cohen's pretty good yeah he might be solid yeah yeah well
obviously i would be your favorite amir, but like I meant like favorite.
No, I don't think so.
Jake, yeah, forget it, actually.
Top 10, though.
Oh, it burns.
I'm freaking out.
I kissed him on the cheek.
They're frenching on the Zoom.
She's kissing with tongues.
That's in Latin.
Oh, another runner Amir likes to do, because you have your, oh, this tastes very beany.
Amir likes to, sometimes when I kiss him he goes our first kiss
and he's said it so many times now
or whoa I thought we were
just roommates
that's really good
feel free to use that one guys
so Jake you can use that one too
it could be like a fun role play
too almost like
then roommates become I don't know
even less like acquaintances.
Whoa, I thought we were just acquaintances.
You gave me the impression that we weren't even friends yet.
We were just well to do's.
We have one last question and it's about Whistlers.
All right.
This one is a Canadian man.
So what's a Canadian name for this man?
Leonard Cohen.
Yo.
No, I don't want to.
What if it's a nasty question?
Okay.
We need a different Canadian.
It's music.
Jay Baruchel.
That's cool.
The two goats.
Seth Rogen.
Let's go with Seth Rogen.
Seth Rogen writes,
So I work on construction sites,
and there's an archetype of construction dudes
who exist at almost every site who persistently whistle while they work.
And I hate whistling.
It rings in my ears.
It makes me want to puke out of my ass.
Something about the piercing frequency and the general cheery nature of whistling can ruin it says that people who do this to show some sort of false sense of bravado and control,
which, to the detriment of those
unwiddling whistlers, makes
me detest them even more.
Like most things
that bother me to the point of homicidal rage,
I presume that this is a me problem,
but I'm literally taken out of my body
and astral projected into the
hellscape of unimaginable torture, and
I'm not proud of it, but that's just how it feels.
I guess I'm just wondering if you have any experience dealing with a workplace whistler
and if you can have any genuine advice about how to get them to stop
without jamming a fucking screwdriver through their neck.
I'm sorry for the violent language.
I'm just trying to paint a picture here, fellas.
For now, I guess my main strategy is to take a passive-aggressive sigh
and put on my headphones and listen to you guys fight about turdies, which is fine, but I'm interested in hearing what you say.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
I will definitely follow up, pup, whatever strategy you suggest for next time some jackass tried to pollute thee.
Huh.
Okay. Okay.
Okay.
It seems like he might have jabbed a screwdriver to someone's neck at the end.
Yeah, he offed himself.
So I don't hate whistling, but like there are things that bother me.
Like everyone has their thing that's like, oh my God, this person's doing this and I can't stop thinking about it.
Love everything everyone does. your thing is restless leg like if somebody's wrestling it's worse than that it's
like any repetition yeah that would make me great i mean there's like bouncing or if someone's
tapping or or even just like this like someone's scratching a spot over and over i have to i start
to be like can you please stop and i really can't function yeah or i can leave but but sometimes
you're in a position
where you can't leave like this guy who works construction so i feel like wow yeah you would
hate you actually would hate living with me then if that's the case oh i'd have to see i'd like
what would i i pull on my beard all the time yeah i do a lot of that do a lot of face touching jill's
always telling me i don't mind if it is like in passing it's just if it's the if it goes on for too long i start to get really anxious i guess i something i do a lot is like
scratch this just like the um the top of my hand where my finger meet oh my palm
if i can't see it it's okay sometimes people just hide it from me you know like under the table or
yeah then it's okay okay i'm trying to think if i have something that drives me insane
yeah like some people hate the noise of food like popcorn being eaten is a big one for people
um yeah mine is um i get goosebumps sometimes at like certain surfaces like
the when you like rub your fingernails against the
a record like those small grooves give you like a little goosebumps i didn't know that i know he
has a thing about um like thin necklaces oh yeah just like jewelry like i would never wear a watch
and i don't like people wear a lot of jewelry for sure but even if i wore like i don't but if i were
considering wearing like a dainty like a small necklace that
would be upsetting to you you'd rather a big thick necklace yeah i would rather no jewelry at all and
i get to determine that texture yeah i don't like when people are like watching something on their
phone with the sound on it like not wearing headphones if i um especially if they're like
scrolling and like watching different things oh like on instagram
tiktok if somebody's in on tiktok in the room yes yes i would freak out jake and i have had
many conversations about game of thrones and there was a conversation about somebody joining
to watch one of the episodes and i vetoed it because i was like she's gonna be on her phone
and it's gonna bother me yes i can't i really don't like when people are on their phone while
i'm watching tv i don't and jill and i fight about this one sometimes that like i don't like
any talking at all when i'm watching a show or a movie that i want to watch so like people talk
like who's this guy oh you know what you know what he's doing did you hear that like i hate i hate any
any question or commentary.
I have a weird unspoken rule, which we've never discussed,
but where I'll like sometimes say something,
like my prediction of what I think is going to happen or something in a movie.
But I always wait for like when the characters aren't talking so that I'm not overlapping.
And then Amir will chime in with his, but they've started talking.
And then I have to rewind.
And he's like, you were just talking.
But I wasn't talking while they were talking.
Yeah, but you also do the, wait, where's this person from?
Pause it.
I have to look it up right now.
I have to look up where that actor is from.
Stop the film, everyone.
Imagine doing that in a theater.
Stop the movie.
I have to see.
And then it's like 48 filmography.
Like, no, I didn't see that.
I didn't see that.
I didn't see that.
And then like, but the funny thing about that is like when you there's no way it can actually actually come to
like a satisfying conclusion because then you'd be like oh he was in season two of the west wing
and you're like great who's like thank god we paused thank god i know that too but sometimes
it is intense like with i can't remember his name right now
but with ted lasso i loved this one guy i didn't i didn't even have to i just had to look up who
played him and as soon as i saw the actor's name i was like oh right of course from buffy
but i but i was gonna make me insane until oh anthony head that's what it was i didn't look
it up actually let's stop this podcast we have to look it up who it was but as soon as i saw the
name anthony head i was like oh right from buffy and then i could fully enjoy this series yeah i actually i'm looking at anthony
head you're looking up anthony head oh yeah there he is giles yeah exactly you get it oh and he was
the bad guy he's that did you watch ted lasso yeah yeah yeah he's like her ex-husband i love him so
much see it pays off you have to pause well no we didn't have to pause
we're doing it now we're not watching it's the perfect time but i couldn't most interesting i
was like gonna lose my mind until i could place what he was from and then as soon as i saw his
name i was like of course giles from buffy see you kind of get it sometimes i sometimes i do that
but i don't um make uh i well i don't i don't like make an announcement i'm like i'll just
like search someone's IMDb.
But then you're on your phone while we're watching.
No, I just do it really quickly.
And then I lock it.
And then I'm like, okay, now I'll remember when I stop that I need to know this.
I set myself a little reminder.
That's what I do.
Oh, interesting.
That seems like it would take just as much time as looking it up.
Nope, sometimes a little less.
All right, all right. Sometimes I take Amir's phone out of his hand and then put it face down. He'll be on it. And, sometimes a little less. All right, all right.
Sometimes I take Amir's phone out of his hand
and then put it face down.
Yeah.
Because he'll be on it.
And I'm like, nope.
And I find that so cool.
Adorable.
Our first kiss.
I thought we were just roommates.
So would you ever tell people
on the episode where the guest is kissing the host?
The guest is kissing the host the guest is kissing
that hasn't happened wow since probably since josh was on and started necking me halfway through what
i'll kill him uh so sometimes you're in a situation where if you tell people something
that annoys you they decide to ramp it up and i feel like construction site might be one of those situations where like if you give them a weakness they'll pounce on it so i'm afraid he
can't mention anything right or all you can do is whistle louder oh can you whistle that's about it
this guy listening right now is fucking freaking out. Oh, no. He puts on this episode to drown out the whistles.
What's all fucking...
Right at this moment.
He's fucking loose his mind.
I wonder what he thinks about tea kettles.
Oh, good question.
Yeah, I guess he just doesn't like whistling sounds.
But it's funny that he also just went in search of corroborating evidence that whistling is bad.
Yeah.
What would you guys do if people were whistling?
Clearly, his search term must have been, like, why that whistling is bad. Yeah. What would you guys do if people were whistling? Like he clearly, his search term must have been like,
why is whistling bad?
Like there's no way that he just looked up whistling
and found that it's a sign of control
or it's like a power dynamic.
Maybe he has a weak whistle
and he needs to work on his own whistle
so he can feel powerful in this situation
rather than emasculated by their yeah whistling
actually this guy is in canada he might live near whistler imagine how fucking devastating that would
be i wonder if he ever gets whistle nose you know we're like sometimes you're breathing and your
nose just does the thing oh yeah there was a jake and amir episode where i have a hum when I scream. A hum? And then it's... Yeah, you also, you misconstrue,
you think that a sales clerk called you hum
instead of hun.
Like my nose emits a humming noise.
Yeah, God.
Whistles, whistler, hates them, torture.
I think you can only whistle louder, I really do.
Or sing a song.
This person is doing something to distract themselves while they're working.
So you have to disrupt their flow.
Drop a hammer on their foot.
That's cool.
Or you could just start talking to them.
Have a conversation.
That's a good idea.
He can't he can't
whistle and talk at the same time and maybe then you'll get to know him and you'll like him what a
pacifist answer i love it it's beautiful let me say it yeah what if you talk what if you just
whistle at them no that's not what he said he didn't say whistle at them. Close. Line.
He said, okay, try it this way.
What if you got to know them instead?
What if you got to know them instead?
And you had a conversation with them.
Okay, that was bad.
Yes.
This is what it was like directing me too.
You guys have both done it.
You get it.
That's true.
We both have now.
What's your favorite part of directing, Amir?
The fact that I don't memorize any lines.
Yeah, yeah, it was always the memorizing lines.
But it's funny, I think I've talked about this on the show,
because Amir and I, we act the same way.
We are the same actor.
We would do Jake and Amir's, we would shoot so many,
we'd show up and stumble through one script and then memorize it for the next one and
we were constantly kind of like finding ways to hide the script on our computer because
we were shooting so much so like i don't blame him this is how i acted as well but like a normal
actor a normal person shows up and you know all of the prepared yeah for sure especially if you're
the star and you wrote it you want to be like i'm off book so we would amir would come and he'd be like what are we shooting today yeah and everyone else would
know because they were actual actors who knew their lines and i would be like we send the
schedules ahead of time and then like and then when you're directing you kind of have a sense
of like how everything needs to happen and And like, when you get behind,
it's for things like your act or not.
Like I have to,
let's take that again because I was an off book yet,
but like maybe after a few more read throughs.
A couple hours.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Can we shoot the rehearsal and then I'll just get it on the last take?
Like,
well,
you'd read,
ideally we're getting it on every take because there are things interesting that are
not in the actors that's the other like actor mentality or like i don't think it's an all actor
mentality but sometimes you think that like all of this depends on is me saying the words right
and doing a good job and if i stutter then that's bad but if i don't that's good but like what's
actually happening is like the the lights are dipping in sound cuts out like there's like a weird like there's a million things
that can go wrong so you have to get you have to do the lines right every time because i'm sorry
this is your favorite part of directing amir but he never knows his lines um my that's my um fake
favorite i guess the my action my nice favorite i think he uh finds a
a way to make a scene funny every single time which is good in a comedy and thank you but bad
in a dramedy and you're like oftentimes you give me no you're like this is not a comedy don't play
it for comedy i'm like right no for sure i don't know how to not be funny, though. Like, I can't be serious because there's no actual moment in my life where I'm acting this way.
So I have to, like, literally invent an out-of-body experience where I do need to be serious, which is so rare.
Which I think you pull off in Antisocial Distance.
Shout out.
Slipping in that plug.
But I think you do.
Although it is really funny if i have an audition sometimes
and i want to like have amir be my reader i can't have him do it for like i had a rom-com audition
and let's say it's like i'm reacting to lines like i knew i fell for you when i saw you a serious
rom-com or whatever and amir's like i knew i fell for you when i? I'm like, that's not, this is ruining the scene.
Sorry, I can't read this shitty dialogue well.
I'm not an actor.
I'm just a reader.
Well, that's almost how you know that the writing's good,
when Amir can do it, when Amir pulls it off.
And also, I'll caveat that with,
I'm the only one who can write good.
So the only way you know it's good writing
is if I can do it well,
and I'm the only one who can write well. So it's you know you can it's good writing is if i can do it well and i'm the only one who can write well so it's a very narrow definition of good yeah but we thread
that needle every time because i'm always writing in some capacity the words that i have to act and
jake has nothing to add it's all you oh yeah it's a one-man show yeah right as long as i as long as
i got the dp to show up on time then then your job is done Amir's the Billy Corden
of this whole show
yeah smashing pumpkins now
alright
I think we gave this guy advice which is to
talk to them try to throw them
off your scent and then
don't ever bring up that you hate whistling because they'll keep
mentioning that there's also
I'll just add I don't know if that is helpful but
I have had a couple of situations where somebody's doing the thing that makes me insane and i can't leave
and one time i always pin it on me because it is me i'm the problem it's not that whistling is a
problem that i have a problem with whistling and so i'll be like i'm so sorry it's not you
i have this thing can you please not do that because it makes me insane um and i have had
somebody be like fuck off and then i just never
went back to that place again and then another time someone's like oh my gosh yes of course like
i didn't even know i was doing it i'm so sorry so i think you're right jake they probably are
the type of people that are going to be like fuck off but you don't know until you try i said that
actually and uh i love that joke what's that joke you make, Jake, about? Oh, I thought we were just roommates.
Yeah, that's me.
It me.
Or the one about the bean stew.
You're ignoring me.
I love that one.
That one is Jake's.
Where you call each other Jay.
Yeah.
And also where you say, wow, our first kiss.
I love all that.
Now you're just sort of putting us together into some sort of bucket.
But yeah, you're my favorite Jake, I'd say.
Amir Cohen's probably my favorite Amir.
I also wanted to say maybe Canadian construction workers are nicer than American.
Oh, that's really true.
Yeah, everyone's really nice.
Good point, Jake.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I do think, yeah, depending on how well you know the guy, you can make a judgment call
on if saying something is going to work.
Has somebody ever whistled at you?
That's like a classic construction archetype. Like, have you ever been cat called specifically by a construction worker
yeah i think so not a long time i haven't like passed a construction site in a long time yeah
but it does happen yeah that's cool i mean it's awful but that's cool that it happened to you babe
because i'm so hot that means i'm hot and cool i smoked weed in between seventh and eighth
grade for the first while they cat called you yeah i cleared the fucking green devil
i flicked my roach at the construction workers as i walked past and they were just putting
all right avital one last time where can people watch this web series which is now all online
entirely yeah please binge it all and leave comments on the youtube and dm me and tell me Right. Avital, one last time. Where can people watch this web series, which is now all online entirely?
Yeah. Please binge it all and leave comments on the YouTube and DM me and tell me what you liked or hated.
I'll take whatever, but it's at antisocialdistance.com.
And then I'm at avitalash on Twitter, TikTok, Instagram. So you can find me and tell me what you think.
Actually, somebody DM'd Amir on Orion today to tell him how much they loved the series, which made me really happy.
Wow. Synergy.
Very cool.
Synergy indeed.
That's right.
And we should say Orion is up and running.
So thanks to everybody that's downloaded our dating app.
Some of the bugs are getting squashed every day by Jeff, so things are looking more and more stable over there.
So if you were waiting to be a week two, now's your chance.
You can just search Orion dating. I actually am fucking cleaning up on that app i have so many
so many matches yeah hours yeah everyone is feeling yeah you can't get that feeling on
or hinge you know are you on chander and they're like i don't get any matches
the prompts are good yeah they're funny and fun and so far i've matched with amir and jake and so
the the conversation has been fun um and somebody complimented me too and you're on there too so
dudes can match with you as well yeah except i haven't been swiping amir is though clearly
yeah i'm actually i have to i have to go because i'm meeting up with
jan later today as long as yeah he has a I have to go because I'm meeting up with Jan later today.
That's right.
Jan.
As long as,
yeah,
he has a Jan and a Jan.
Sven,
are you meeting up with him?
Nice.
Oh,
call back.
Fuck.
I can't stop saying nice when there's a dope now,
because I live with him.
Imagine that hellscape.
All right,
sweet.
Avital,
thanks for joining us.
Thanks to everyone that's wrote in their questions or your
theme songs uh you can send them all to if i were you show at gmail.com opening theme song actually
it was just the first half of that sweet sweet song so why don't we play the entire sweet sven
yeah that's the entire sven version uh by lucas and sven band so shout out. So shout out to Sven. Shout out to you guys for listening.
And shout out to Avital, antisocialdistance.com.
Thank you.
Oh yeah.
This is a HeadGum podcast.
Nice. Nice. Liquid and nice, I'm on his mind I write to ask him about a ring
He tells me what to do with my ex's bling
If I were you, here's what I would do
If I were you, here's what I would do
But Jake is just called guiding ice
He's wondering about the emotional price When people don't know what to do
They write in to ask these two Jews
If I were you, here's what I would do
If I were you, here's what I would do
If I were you, here's what I would do if I were you is what I would do if I were you is what I would do. That was a Hidgum Original.