Segments - Bonus: Open Relationship (w/Jeff Rosenberg!) 2019

Episode Date: August 14, 2023

Our friend and fellow Headgum podcaster Rosie Rosenberg joins us to discuss how he met Jake, and Amir’s cool new nickname. Advertise on If I Were You via Gumball.fm.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum original. Hello, if you're listening to this podcast before September 27th, 2024, we're doing a live show in Philadelphia. You can still buy tickets at headgum.com slash live. Hope to see you there. Nice. Try one more where it's clear that I'm like the star. There's a reason I didn't have you say anything. Yeah.

Because you're nervous, you're skittish, you're stuttering right now. right now i'm a little so i don't want you in this ad at all i don't want to be steamrolled but i know i won't be recording one in fact for you asking that i'm going to keep this part in don't this part is now edit this part out but let's do one clean ad no you will edit this part out you will absolutely edit this part out. Tell you what, I'm going to say my fucking social security number. So you have to edit it out. Okay. Let's hear it. 091-3662.

Now you have to edit it out. But we'll see you guys there. No, no, no, no, no. What is this? A new If I Were You podcast? Well, kind of. These are episodes that were living behind our Patreon for the last five years, and we figured, why not release some of the best ones onto this feed to

reward those of you that never gave up, that never unsubscribed. So please enjoy this classic episode of If I Were You, recorded at our old studio in 2018. If I were you, if I were you, if I were you, if I were you, I'd tell you what I would do, if only I were you, shark.com. Welcome to If I Were You, the only advice podcast on the web, hosted by us. I'm Mickey. This is Tricky. Hey, I'm Tricky.

Stooch. What was that? I thought we were doing a whole thing. You ruined it. I'm Stooch. Stooch? Yeah, Stooch from middle school. Remember, you brought the paintball gun in that one time? Never heard from him again.

That was you. That was you, and you blamed it on a foreign kid. They found a kill list in your locker. You're like, that's not mine. That's stupid. Remember when I spread that rumor about you having the kill list? Yeah, yeah.

Wasn't that at CollegeHumor? I've never seen you actually so mad at me before. No, I got mad at you. Yeah. Wait, what? That wasn't CollegeHumor. That was at a place of work that I spread a rumor that you had a kill list.

Yeah. And I was also really mad that time. Oh, it was in 2003. The other time I got really mad at you was when you took a photo of me on the toilet. Yes. And you wouldn't delete it. No. And then you made me delete it, but not before I emailed it to myself.

You did not email it to yourself. I did email it to myself. Let's see if you can pull it up. But I think it's an old email that I no longer have access to. That's right. It's a cute photo, though. I've seen it. Wait, you took a picture with a digital camera?

You know one of those? No, no, no. Phone? Yeah. So this was in the iPhone era. Early iPhone. I think it was 2000. It must have been 2008.

Yes, because it was at our apartment. Yeah, great place. And you guys lived together. Do you barge in photo, or you were, like, sneaking through the door? Yeah, no, it's a barge photo. A barge in photo. And you were, like, taking a shit, so your pants were down, trying to cover your dick.

Yeah. Naked, ostensibly. Pants around the ankles. I thought it was funny. Maybe I was laughing. They call that the Stooge snap. Yeah. The Stooge snap.

There's a lot of illegal things. Stooge is a bad guy. Stooge is a bad person. Stooge is Dave. My alter ego Dave. I guess we should actually introduce you. Jeff Rosenberg is here. Yes.

Old friend of ours. Older friend of Jake's. Ancient friend to me. When did you guys meet? What age? I think we were 13 or 14. I remember where we met. We met at the Orange County Fair.

Was it Orange? Whoa. We met at a fair. Really? Orange County? Or the New Jersey Orange County? No, Connecticut. The township of Orange.

Orange County? No. Or maybe Waterbury Fair? No, I did go to the Orange Fair one year, but I think that was when I could drive. And I met you just before your bar mitzvah. So I think I was 14 and you were 13. Were you invited to their b'nai mitzvah?

The first thing he said to me was that I couldn't come to his bar mitzvah. Before you'd even met him, you said, I don't know who you are, bro, but you're not getting in. He's like, this is Jeff. You can't come to my bar mitzvah. The invitations already went out. So I think it was like some sort of like, no matter what, like, if we become friends, you can't come. Yeah.

So don't get. Oh, wow. Who is it? It's my mom. Of course. I, um, I'll pick it up now. You have to pick it up. For master team people, I'm going to pick up the phone later.

It's her birthday. All she wants is to talk to her son just once because you haven't talked to her in... I'm recording a podcast, mom. What do you want? You're so fucking annoying. Okay, yeah, I'll get fucking LASIK. Relax. Is she pressuring you?

Yeah, she thinks I'm a fucking dweeb unless I work out and get no glasses. Your mom sounds awesome. She is really cool, and she's pretty strong. She's bullying you. She can kick my ass. Your mom is a bully. Yeah, she's a bully. She's a troll.

Interesting. She's an angry, angry woman. Sounds like Stooge. Stooge was an angry woman, right? Yeah, that's Ruth, actually. Ruth and Stooge. Ruth and Stooge. Stooge Bader Ginsburg, Ruth's oldest son.

All right, we're here to answer some questions. It's like Chet Hayes. Chet Hayes, Tom Hanks' rapper son? Yeah. So Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson, very sweet, successful actors, had two kids. One became a sweet, successful actor. One is Colin wants to do like

a documentary about the end of a record his favorite record store the other is Chet Hayes sort of an Instagram rapper I guess you can go one of two ways

one of two Hayes nice very good one of Chet Hayes you can either go with the crowd or against the grain. I guess if my parents were rich, successful, and I had all the cash in the world, I would probably just rap too.

Right. I wouldn't have to be nice to people or learn how to act. I would just be like, they've already done that. My parents broke away for me to be a rapper. Yeah. He's actually really good. It's just his name is so bad, nobody respects him. Yeah.

One of his songs was, like, really fucking tight. Yeah. It's, like, really, really tight. Popo Zao? Popo Zao. Yeah. God, all the people that didn't deserve to be musicians are so funny. Like Kevin Federline and Chet Hayes?

Yeah, Kevin Federline and Chet Hayes. There's got to be more. Oh, Rebecca Black, the Friday girl? Becky Black. Yeah. She's a congresswoman now. No shit. Yeah.

Pretty cool, actually. She ran in a super red district, one of the platform of hate. Of Hayes. Hayes Valley. All right, let's try to answer some questions here. We only have so much time. Yes. Jeff, do you have a fake guy's name to refer

to this person as? Looch. Looch writes, Bros, I recently went over to my girl's house to help decorate because her sister was coming home from college for the first time. The entire family was there. Aunts, grandparents, cousins, neighbors.

I went upstairs when I heard the door open and everyone started to celebrate. I started to nervously rehearse my greeting. I got to the top of the stairs when I saw the mom and her sister were at the bottom. The mom said, this is Travis who I've told you so much about. I was awkwardly deciding in my mind

if I should say hi from the top of the stairs or go all the way down before saying hello. I quickly tripped and fell hard down the stairs. A good three to four tumbles before landing with a thud that could be heard for miles. For the next two hours, I was on ice while the entire family was assuring that I was okay, but obviously laughing about the fall behind my back. I was humiliated, but I understand how funny the situation is. My question is, should I consistently joke about the situation to help make it less awkward from now on, never mention it again,

or break up with my GF and get as far removed from this family as possible? I wouldn't be worried. The GF's going to break up with you, obviously. You have no balance. One fall says it all. You stumbled. Keep falling out of

my house. Keep falling out of my life. Yeah, they should have just opened the door at the bottom of the stairs. You tumble out into the lawn. They slam the door behind you. The new boyfriend steps over him. Perfectly composed. He does the Willy Wonka. Stumble, stumble, stumble.

Flip. Grand reveal. Standing ovation. Ta-da. Leans the mom over and kisses her on the mouth. Wow. At this point, he's fallen. It's at least been a week, right?

Yeah. No, he's writing this email awkwardly like from the couch. He's got an ice pack on his head right now talking. I'm sitting on frozen peas

and I swear to God I heard the great uncle go and then he fell and my, her aunt was cracking up so hard. The neighbor keeps snickering at me.

Have you ever embarrassed yourself in front of your signo? Your signo's family? Plus family, though? Yeah, plus family. Me? Yeah, most likely. Oh, yeah. I can answer that, of course.

Yeah. Jeff was a constant embarrassment. He was drunk and high through many family vacations. Do you remember when you tried to wrestle Micah and you pulled your back? Right. I bring that up to Micah a fair amount because I think that's pretty much a decade ago at this point. And that was a funeral. And Micah, before he got, you know, jacked, he, correct me if I'm wrong, he was thick. Oh, yeah. There was a time before high school that he was, like, thicker.

Right. And then you had the sectional couch. We were wrestling around as boys are wanted to do because he was looking for this out of his older brother. His older brother was, you know, doing stuff, hanging out with certain types of people. Yes, I was living a rich, decadent life. I was sort of like a Gatsby, and Jeff was more of a, I don't know. Any other characters than Gatsby. A pedophile that wanted to wrestle my 11-year-old brother?

No, he may have been at the very least 12 at the time. So we're wrestling. I would say he was definitely 12 at the time. I'm kind of nurturing him, trying to be that older brother figure, that father figure that he's been looking for all of his life. The father figure he wanted by wrestling him? You were 14. So his legs are wrapped around my shoulders at this point in a powerbomb position, right? And I scooch him in his navel towards mine.

This is all part of the wrestling move, though. It's a navel-to-nipple grapple. Right now, you're trying to be my brother's father figure by, I guess he has his legs over your shoulders and you scooch him in towards your pelvis. Yeah, I scooch him in, but that's part of the move. And then you lift him up, and as I'm lifting him up to powerbomb him,

you know what the powerbomb is? Yeah. Everyone was sitting Shiva. Just a pop in my back. Yeah, what happened there? A slipped disc. No, I think it just like separated the lower vertebrae.

Jesus. And it really acts up every now and then. And you blame Micah for being a fat 12-year-old? I can't blame myself. Because you started the story by saying that he was thick. There was a time before he was fit that he was thick.

Right. I'm just saying he was heavier than what I expected. But I didn't say fat. He was a thick pre-tween. And I hurt myself throwing him. Jake wasn't around, so I had to powerbomb the bitch. But would you say I embarrassed myself in front of your family? No.

The family loves you. Yeah, I think there's coming back from this. It was an honest mistake. It's not like he was mean or offensive in some way. If anything, now he's the guy who fell down, and he's kind of a silly mascot for the family. I think then he has to continue to play that up

though. He has to like... It depends how you laugh at yourself. If it's an uncomfortable laugh at yourself or you're really digging into yourself in a self-deprecating way. Sometimes if you won't let something go, even if you seem to have a good nature about it, like... It looks painful.

Yeah, don't hand it to me. I might trip and fall down the stairs. Like, hey, you can't let it go, you know? It's been four years. It's clearly weighing on you. I think you have to have a good sense of humor about it. Like, you have to be able to laugh about it every time they bring it up.

I think the issue was he wanted to steal the limelight in the first place by, like, having this grand entrance from the top of the stairs where he like greets his girlfriend and sister. It's like, where do you get off in the first place? Like, you're not the entrance. Like, she's home from college. You're an afterthought. I didn't even think about that. That is strange.

Like, everybody is like saying hello and then you come down. You run upstairs. He wanted to debut. He came downstairs in the sister's old prom dress. And a music cue. He's wearing gloves from a cotillion. Here comes the luge. Here comes the luge.

High heel snaps. I like the idea of him really leaning into it, though. Like, every single time you enter somewhere, there's, like, some sort of, like, crazy slapstick moment. Right. He does a crap fall all the time. Right. You pull up to pick somebody up. You, like, jerry-rig your airbag to go off in your face.

Right. Like, yeah, you greet the dad for the first time. Your pants fall to your ankles. Or no, it should escalate. It just should escalate to where he hurts himself more every time until the family just starts actually feeling bad for him. Right. Falling down the stairs is like no joke.

Like you fall down. At a graduation party, you fell off the roof. It seems like, I don't know if he flipped or fell on his ass and slid a little bit. I don't know what's funnier. It sounds like he didn't get to hang on to the railing. That was close. I'm not used to stairs. Lovely house.

Next Thanksgiving, you have to cut off your thumb when you're carving the turkey. Oop. Yuck, yuck, yuck. Oh. I think you don't bring it up ever again. Right. But at some point, when you've cemented yourself as a family staple, right now it's also a little,

joking about you is a little bit of like, it's what's, tepid, tentative? What's the word? I don't know. Tertiary. It's a fresh wound? Yeah. It's tertiary to be sure.

Yeah. I don't know what tertiary means, but it's definitely that. It's quite tertiary. Yeah. It's like you have to like test the waters. You're not like so much a part of the family that you can be made fun of. Right. Yeah.

If anything but silver lining, it brings you closer to the family. Yeah. Because now they feel comfortable. That's nice. They should be comfortable making fun of you to your, you know. Oh, that's good. I also just remembered that Jill fell down one of the first times that she met my mom. What happened?

She slipped on the stairs. Downstairs. She didn't. It was like it was the bottom of the first times that she met my mom. What happened? She slipped on the stairs. Downstairs. She didn't. It was like it was the bottom of the stairs. She slipped on like the last stair and landed on her butt and basically like went and like sat on the landing. Just like sitting on the landing. But she had met she had met my mom already. But it was like one of the first times that Jill had come home to Connecticut to spend the weekend with people.

And it was really funny, but we've never talked about it since. So maybe it is forgettable. Definitely. But I think it's probably different if Jill took a full tumble down the stairs. Or what if he passes it off like he leans over to the dad. He's like, you know, I did that on purpose.

Excuse me? Tooth falls out. The fall. That's a thing I do. I think he's got to find the sister a boyfriend and then pay him off to do something. Even worse. Not even worse, just like more recent. I found a kill list.

You think I fell down? Well, I fell on some really harsh evidence here. He doesn't even have to pay him off. He can just, yeah, he can just do that. Yeah, he can catch someone red-handed in a red-eye, digging himself into a deeper hole. And then when he's like, that's your handwriting. Is it? You can make this other guy the biggest klutz doofus of all.

Make him the scapegoat. Yeah, or just come and show up at the next family thing with a fucking gun. Who finds it funny that I fell? Are you laughing now? Not at all, but we now think we thought you were funny before. Do you have a problem with me?

The kickback fucking clocks his nose. Oh! Shit. Gun lands, goes off. The kickback Fucking clocks his nose Oh Shit Gun lands Goes off With a salt spray gun Let's forget this ever happened Comes down the stairs

With a gun And falls I'm okay I bet you think I'm so This is salt Who's laughing now Chuck on his own blood.

I'd love to ask your daughter's hand in... I can act it. I can act it. I mean, I'm going to make it, right? I'm going to make it. I'm going to make it, all right? I'm cold. I'm so cold.

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Alright, let's answer another question. This one's from a lady. Yeah. Got a fake girl's name? Jasmina. Jasmina. Jasmina. So I matched with a guy on Bumble three months ago.

Since then, we've gone on four dates and slept together once. Nice. They've all gone very well. He's funny, easy to talk to, totally my type, and really good in bed. Woo! This guy sounds like me. Maybe it is you. You have a girlfriend. I was just...

Maybe you're bragging about your bumble day. You chose this question probably so you could sort of shout yourself out. All right, let's take that again. I feel like that's also... Should we cut? I'm actually not easy to talk to, so it's obviously not me. True. But good in bed.

I'm prickly. I'm not very good in bed. And I'm not very, I'm not her type. Okay. So I was joking. I claw my way in. Sorry. So I was.

I'm an acquired smell. I was joking too, but now you're sort of just like revealing that you. I was kidding. You sprained your wrist. Hairline fracture, I can see it. You're bad in bed? She continues. After our most recent fourth date, at the end of which we discussed going on another,

I pulled up his Bumble profile to show my friends. I had not looked at it recently since we had moved to texting not long after matching. To my shock... What do you guys think? He's obviously still active. Updating his profile picture? Ooh, I like the updating. To my shock...

To my shock, he had noted in his bio that he was in an open relationship. This information was not in his bio back when we had started talking a few months earlier. He has never said anything or behaved in any way in person to indicate that this was the case. I ended up not showing it to my

friends because it made me extremely humiliated to have been left in the dark like this. So my question is, what the fuck? Do I confront him about this information? Isn't being in an open relationship with someone else an important piece of info to share with someone you are seeing? Jake, I love you, but this sounds like some shit you would pull.

That's true. You're taking ownership of something you didn't even do. This sounds like a page right out of my handbook. Is this fucked up? I'm wondering if she's the one that he's in the open relationship with. That's exactly what I was thinking, too. Oh. So, like, yeah, I'm in an open relationship now with you.

Yeah. Like, would that be a relief to her? Oh, thank God. I think she assumes that she is the one that is the relationship, and they have the open relationship together. I think she assumes that there's another girl that he's in an open relationship with. Yeah. She's like, you're in an open relationship.

I just think it's possible that it is what Jeff thinks too. It's so much less likely to say you're in an open relationship after not talking to But like what if you're, you're, you've gone on four dates with somebody and you like where it's going and you're like, I really want to just I really want to just like if you're a real weird anal person you're like I should update my Bumble profile I've been on four dates but I'm down to hang out with you as well. I'm not off the market but things are trending that way.

I met her uncle and I fell next to him so in case I'm ostracized I'm still down to go on a first date. I will say this though. It is even if say hypothetically there's no other girl. That's kind of a cool line. Like, oh, me and this woman have, we're so mature in our, like, love that we're open about it. Like, it adds a little extra little crust on there.

That's an interesting move for your bio. I also just thought it'd be really funny if the guy that fell down the stairs was icing his back, lying on a couch, working on his new Bumble profile. He's that sure that the relationship is over. Oh, no. I'm going to call an Uber as soon as I feel up to the task and I'm out of here. And I have the signal now that much is clear.

Sometimes they say, like, don't move in case you got concussed. So just don't let me go to sleep. I don't think I will. He's craning his neck looking at his mobile phone. I can't move. I don't want to swallow my tongue. Hup, hup, hup, hup, hup.

But, yeah, I think. Whole family's in the hot tub outside. This is definitely information that she should have had initially. And I think it's worth confronting him about it. Four dates, one sex, though? I don't know if she's... I guess if it's four dates over, like... That's a month, right?

I mean, yeah. Going on four dates and sleeping with somebody, like, one that indicates to me that you take sex seriously. Like, it's not like, I went on one date and fucked him. Right. Like, she clearly wanted to, I went on one date and fucked him. Right. Like, she, she clearly wanted to, like, build towards this.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. And is, like, opening herself up and, like, getting to know this guy a little better. Right. And now it's all been, like,

pulled out from under her. It's all under false pretenses. Yeah, no, I feel, I feel her on that because it's over-assuming. He is in a relationship with someone. He was in a relationship when they went on dates and things.

Yes. That's what I think. So he's... Unless he's also... Bad dude? Yeah. Bad dude? But afraid of confrontation at the very least.

Yeah. Because he's like, he's not cheating on his current girlfriend because they're in an open relationship. But it's still information you have to disclose. It can't be a secret open relationship. Or can it? Well, that's the interesting thing when it comes to not cheating. You think that you're like off the hook. He's like, well, I'm not cheating.

So it's good. So it's not bad. Yeah. Well, you're sort of lying to me. Not lying. He's not telling you the whole story. Right. But you can still mistreat somebody while being

cool to your open relationship. But then you just like, as the new girl, the Bumble girl, now she's an accessory. She's not the bottom bitch, if you will. That's cool. That's a really cool name for me, going

forward. Bottom bitch? Or whatever, BB. And then we don't tell people what it stands for. Right, but you are my bottom bitch. Yeah, for sure. But nobody knows that. And then Jake still podcasts

with other people. You still podcast with other people. Yeah, that's true. But you're still each other's bottom bitch. Jake's like the podfather and I'm the bottom bitch. That's cool. Two cool nicknames.

Podfather. That's great. Yeah, that is a really cool nickname. Godfather. That's great. Yeah, that is a really cool nickname. We can even switch sometimes. We wouldn't switch. We would never switch. We would never switch. Because your nickname is too cool.

And it's also so perfectly you. Because it's like super cool? Yeah. It's quintessential Blumenfeld. I might even try it at like the DMV or some shit. I think that's cool. Is Amir here? Blumenfeld, number 47.

I'm like, that's me, but I go by bottom bitch. You could do that as like a vanity plate almost. BTM, B-I-C-H. Yeah, bottom bitch. That's cool. And then like people honk at me. I'm the bottom bitch. Yeah. Both hands on the wheel. so and then like people honk at me and I'm like I'm the bottom bitch yeah

both hands on the wheel tombstone reads bottom bitch it was an honor here lies bottom bitch I feel bad saying that word at a funeral

in a eulogy but I guess he would have wanted to know about that he legally got his name changed so we have to say it he went to court for this

so what do you guys say to the girl who wants to confront the guy do you say call him out on it yeah definitely call him out what's this I don't yeah it doesn't have to be like some sort of like gotcha bumble date the guy. Call him out on it. Yeah, definitely call him out. What's this?

Yeah, it doesn't have to be like some sort of gotcha Bumble date. But I think you could bring it up and just be like, hey, what's the deal with this?

No one likes getting sandbagged. Yeah. And then she's got to say, but then she's also got to say that she was back

on Bumble to check things out. Unless she says, my friend sent this to me. Yeah. She saw you. I was going to show your profile to my friends.

We've been on four dates. That's normal. I would know, as somebody on a dating app, that my profile is being shared with a group of friends. Right. Does that happen to you on Tinder? Of course, yeah. People would send me a screenshot of my profile by accident

because they were meaning to send that to other people. But do you want to call someone out like that? Is that like a – that seems to me to warrant like a resentful response, like an eye roll. I think you have a conversation separately not having to do with the the added line oh so you just bring it up are you in an open relationship like this is what this is yeah but this is why that's dangerous because you could be like oh like are you seeing anybody else and it's like nope and then you're like then you have to be like well i know that you are so like i asked

you a lot of questions right your line of of questioning can be construed as dishonest or like, what is that called? Double jeopardy or something? Right. Or entrapment? Yeah, you can't find out information. I fucked the same girl twice. Leading the bottom bitchness, your honor.

Hi, bottom bitch here. Question for the court. Wait, are you a bottom bitch esquire no I'm a juror and I'm just a little confused about what's going on here juror 9 bottom bitch so on the movies it's all like

sorry you were dismissed from the jury yes for my racist ideology but I was wondering if I could do you guys validate I wanted to see if I showed up in the court portraits. Yeah, I wanted to see if I bought a bitch. You're wearing a pencil skirt. I always wanted a caricature of me.

Can the court stenographer read this back? How long did you have to fucking pose like this for the sketch artist to get you? I'm an OJ juror, and every time I saw the person doing the sketch, I would you. I'm an OJ-ger, and every time I saw the person doing the sketch, I would flash the shocker so that when they would show the portraits on TV, that was me. Wearing gloves.

That's the bottom bitch right there. That's good. Wow. That's good stuff. So you say bring it up, show it right off the bat, the bio. Yeah. In a cool way. Bring it up in a cool way.

That's cool. Sunglasses, by the way. Check this out. You're in an open relationship. What's up, man? Beef cake. What's up? With this.

What's up? Yeah, that's good. That's good. What's up? Hold on. Let me show you the Budweiser Frogs commercial. Oh, this is funny. See how there's three?

The one on the left is the bottom bitch frog. The one on the right is you. Yeah, and then who's this? The throaty one. Who's this wise cracker? The wise of the bunch. Oh, wise cracker is kind of a cool name for you. Really?

Because you're like wise and you crack it, dude. Can we say that? Yeah, no, that's going to have to get bleeped out. That's Chet Hayes' next rap name, Wisecracker. That's a good album for him. I would bring it up. And you can say that your friend sent you the picture. You don't have to say, I was looking at the bumble.

Right. Sure. You can lie about how you came across it. But do you chew them out? He's like, oh, yeah, yeah. I got Michelle. And then what? What do you say back to that? Why didn't you tell me that? Oh, because, you know, it's bumble. Oh, that's cool.

Alright, let's kiss. I guess if you say, why didn't you tell me that? And he says, because it's bumble, you can end the relationship. Because it's Bumble, bitch. Wait, where are you going? I broke my tailbone. I fractured it.

All right, sweet. That was painless. 30 minutes up, 30 minutes down. One more? It's called ad-free content. Wow. Easy. That's great.

Appreciate you coming by. I do have an ad, though. Oh, what's that? Neckcorrector.com. Oh, you have something to promote? Yeah, no, I push ads now. They're from my, you know, my Forkchula friends? Yeah.

You were what? Forkchula? No. Forkchula. You said yeah first. What is Forkchula? I wanted to do like that. Yeah, he was trying to like get you to wrap up.

It's a spatula that you put on your teens or the tines, if you will, on your fork. Oh. So you can scoop up that marinara sauce, whatever. It's sort of chocolate sauce you have at the bottom of your dish. That's nice. That's actually really, what's it called?

But they've actually switched, that's the forksula, but they're moving away from that. And now they're doing the neck. Yeah, Ollie and his partner. Got it. David, I believe. Ollie.

Who the hell are these people? They're in Prince Edward Island. They're some buddies that I met through conferences. Prince Edward Island? Is that in Canada? Yeah. I have no further questions, but continue. So they moved on to the neck corrector.

Check it out, neck corrector. What does neck corrector do? That'll help, you know, how I hurt my back. Yeah. You know, it elongates the spine. And, you know, it just helps you lay on it. And it just is a simple way. So you can either buy that or not try to suplex a tween. But if you've already suplexed a tween.

Well, the neck corrector is not going to work for that. You need more of a hip displacement. I'll talk to Ali back at the shop. Yeah, just focus on forks. I'm sad that they abandoned the forcula. They're trying to sell forcula if you guys are interested in a new venture. A small forcula that will cost you for the forcula. Have you made a sale on those things yet?

Yeah, I've made one. Do you have a prototype? No, they make it. I just pushed the code. That's neckcorrect at neckcorrector.com but is it your concept so they came up with the shit yeah they do all the work

I get 50% of the sales I'm so sad that we spent time doing it I'm not happy about it either you just made my kill list but anything you want to promote besides neckcorrector I'm not happy about it either. You just made my kill list, bud. Anything you want to promote besides neck corrector?

We're looking to do our 200th episode show live at the gutter. And I'm pretty sure this is 99% going to happen, so I can say it. That's cool. So that'll be, I believe, May 16th or 17th in Brooklyn so we'll try to get this out beforehand 200th app I'll be there

yes should be fun Amir can I count you in bottom bitching it put bottom bitch on the list and we'll see if you show up we'll be back next week

thanks for watching everybody woo if I were you if I were you if I were you if I were you if I were you if I were you, if I were you, if I were you, if I were you, if I were you, if I were you, I'll tell you what I would do if only I were you. Shark.com.

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