Senses Working Overtime with David Cross - Brooks Wheelan

Episode Date: November 21, 2024

Brooks Wheelan (SNL) joins David to talk about election night, crying at 30 Rock, and more. Catch all new episodes every Thursday. Watch video episodes here.Guest: Brooks WheelanSubscribe and Rate Senses Working Overtime on Apple Podcasts and Spotify and leave us a review to read on a future episode!Follow David on Instagram and Twitter.Follow the show:Instagram: @sensesworkingovertimepodTikTok: @swopodEditor: Kati SkeltonEngineer: Nicole LyonsExecutive Producer: Emma FoleyAdvertise on Senses Working Overtime via Gumball.fm.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. I I didn't realize how tall you were. I guess so, yeah. When did that happen? The last few months. Yeah? Yeah. Just a bit of a growth spurt? Yeah.

38's when it happens. Yeah. How you doing? Did you get any sleep? Yeah, I was actually upstate for that. I watched the results actually at this little bar that actually ended up becoming the Democratic committee for that county. Where were you? Is that part of there? This was like Bear Mountain.

Okay. It was really pleasant to watch it there with them. Yeah. And then it got south. Yeah. Where'd you watch it? Well, initially I was at Hartley's. Right.

And they had a little TV on that little table. And I'd been invited to this private gathering at a bar here in Manhattan that had like the owners had shut it down and they were just having a watch party, which I had zero interest in. Right. And my wife, who knows all those folks, I know like four of them, wanted me to go and had been talking about it for weeks and then she said, listen, you don't have to go. We're both dealing with this in our own way. You can hang out. No worries. Okay. Cool. Thanks. And, uh, you know, she said, I'll text you if it's actually pretty cool, but, uh, cause I said

that sounds like my worst nightmare is a bunch of people, like minded people, you know, commiserating and stitching about. Yeah. Me and my girlfriend, that's why we went up state, we're like, let's get the fuck out of here for this. Yeah.

Yeah. Um, and then, uh, uh, I, here's my text to my wife who was, who was still holding hope. Um, Oh, at that? Yeah. Yeah. And I was, uh, cause I went home and, uh, okay. She's like, Okay. She's like, I was like, oh, um, I said, um, it ain't going to happen at 10 40. Yeah.

And then we, and then she's like, I'm not there yet. And I was like, yeah. Uh, um, and then I wrote fucking Georgia. Yeah. Which is my home state. Oh, that's rough. Iowa.

I had that with Iowa. 1106 and then 1107. This shit is over. I'm afraid. It's really not David. Remember it took days for those other states to come in. Um, I was like, nah, no COVID this time. And then at 1125, uh, you know, she, she wasn't there yet as her words.

And I was like, honey, this is going to be ugly and Congress too. It's over. I'm going to bed. Yeah. So that was my journey. Yeah. I think we love, we left this place at like 10 and then went to like this hotel that we were staying in and watched till like 1130.

Yeah. And then I was like, we'll just turn it off and we'll wake up and it'll say it. And that sucks. Yeah. Yeah. So there you go. But you were right.

The COVID thing did fuck it all up. And also like, I was thinking about this, like it would have dragged on forever if Kamala won because Trump would be like lies, lies, lies, lies, lies. And so like when a reasonable person is like, no, they got more votes. They're like, okay, it's over. Yeah. and so like when a reasonable person is like, no, they got more votes, they're like, okay, it's over.

Yeah. And that's a tiny silver lining, but a silver lining for what it could have been for sure. No, it's just super, it's fucking, and I'm like, the first one I was talking about today, like the first time it happened, I was like shocked. I was like, no fucking way. This time I'm like, this is who we are.

This is who America is. Yes, I have been on the road all over the United States, all over and we'll continue on Friday. I had a, you know, four, whatever it was, four or five days off to come home and vote. And I told my wife, I was like, you're not out there. I'm out there. Those flags are everywhere. They're so big. I'm out there and I'm reading the very small local papers and they're doing their election

things. We talked to 10 people and got their opinions. And, um, and I said the Trump to Harris signs are like 10 to one and also the Trump signs are angrier. They're just fucking angry. Yeah. And yeah, we'll drive them back to nothing but Trump or bus. Like, it's nothing like, I mean, they're crazy, you know?

Yeah. Like, um, I mean, they're, they're just like, you know, fuck Biden stuff that, that the left didn't have. And, um, and you know, that's a, that's a strong force and, um, and there's a lot of them and there were, uh, you know, I was prepared for it. Um, yeah, I, I, for sure.

I think, cause I was touring too. I was like, he's gonna, he's gonna win I think, cause I was touring too, I was like, he's gonna win, cause like you see what's going on outside of New York and LA. And you're just like, it's- Well, I mean, it's really, I mean, most of the, if not all of the urban centers went blue as they tend to do.

But it's once you start getting outside of the city and there's less, you know, gay people and minorities and you know, uh, uh, yeah, it was, um, I, I was completely prepared, not surprised. And as you said, this is who we are. And I know that's who we are because I'm out there. I'm not, you know, it's, I'm not in, you know, LA getting in my car, going to work, going to meet someone for dinner, getting back in my car, going home, or I'm not in New York where, you know, it's, it's,

that's how a lot of people feel. Whether that, those are for legitimate, whether the reasons they're feeling those things are legitimate or not is not for me to say. What part of Georgia did you grow up in? Like in Atlanta or? In outside of Atlanta, it's all one big thing now, but it was a little town called Roswell. Okay, so it was rural when you were growing up? It was like suburban rural.

Okay, because I grew up in Iowa and so I get their point of view of like, nobody thinks about us. Like, I don't, Iowa and like, so I get like their point of view of like, nobody thinks about us. Like I don't, I mean, I don't get it cause they do think about them, but I just understand like how Iowa feels and like Iowa used to be kind of flipped like it was a swing state. Now it's hard read.

Yeah. And it's just like, in my head, what happened was everybody who's smart moved out of Iowa, like me and my friends. Well, that happens everywhere. People go to the city because there's more, and I don't know if smart is the best word. That's so mean to say because my family lives there and I love them. I don't know if smart is the right word, but people who have aspirations, people who want to do things that you simply can't do

and with the limitations of a rural community. Yeah, for sure. You're totally right. And that was, that's like, I don't know, I get to talk shit in Iowa because I've lived there for 22 years and like- Oh, I've done plenty of shows there. I know what you're talking about.

Yeah, it's just like, I'm just like, understand how rural people like are like, yo, fuck the cities and that's Democrats. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I was like a, I was like a Republican, fuck the cities and that's Democrats. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I was like a Republican my whole life till I left Iowa. Not like a hard Republican, but just like,

yeah, I'll vote for Republicans till I was like 25 and then was like, wait, what am I doing? This was, that's brainwash. Yeah, well, yeah. That's one of the more interesting things that is frustrating is that the people, you know, like Trump supporters who would accuse me of being, of me, you know, I'm being brainwashed, I'm being lied to, you know, the, the Democrats and big government, blah, blah, blah.

You know, they're full of shit. Like, I know that. Yeah. You are telling me that and you, and I do know that, but you don't believe you are being lied to when you were being lied to 24 seven, my friend. Yeah. I know I'm being lied to and I can, I've worked at seeing through, sifting through shit.

And you don't, you're accusing me of saying, no, I know I'm being lied to. Yeah. You don't realize you're being lied to. Yes. You're a pawn. Yeah. At least I know.

I know I'm a pawn. You know. That's the most important thing. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, that's very, know I'm a pawn. That's the most important thing. Yeah. That's very, that's a good way to put it. Like, yeah, we know that they're bad, but we, they're less bad than you're bad. Yeah. Yeah. But they're, they're also, I don't, you know, and then it's, it's really time

to face facts about, as you said, who we are, this is who we are. A resounding, well, maybe not are. Uh, we're resounding. Well, maybe not resounding victory, but a victory nonetheless, won the popular vote. You can't go, you can't blame it on a archaic old fucking stupid electoral college thing that never should have existed. But we don't even have that. It's like, look, this is who, and it's a, it's, I

don't think it had, I don't think it had much to do with the personality of Harris and or Biden. I think it was just a repudiation of that Democrat, that. Like our groceries are expensive now. Fuck this. Oh dude. I cannot wait until January 6th, when the price of eggs goes down 80 cents. I am so excited about that.

So on January 6th, the price of eggs and the price of milk is gonna go down. And everything's gonna be good again. Dude, I walked out this morning, it was 8.30 in November, what is today, November 6th? It was 8.30 and it was already like 70 degrees. Dude, I'm in t-shirts and shorts. I told my girlfriend, I was like,

at least global warming's not real. Like at least we have that. This is fucked. Oh yeah, it's, it's a. It's hot out. Yeah, no, it's. It's really hot. It's crazy.

Yeah. And it's a drill baby drill. First thing I'm going to do. But I do now what has Biden got to lose now that the Supreme Court has, has given a president immunity. Yeah. Blanket immunity. Oh, this is good. Yeah. I mean, he's got. Just do some crazy shit. Do some fucking crazy shit. Like he, there. Like there was like, when he was still running and he like tweeted, he's like, if you elect me- Make eggs free.

Yeah, make eggs free. He was like, if you, oh sorry, if you elect me, like I will like roll back Roe v. Wade and somebody responded like, bitch, you're the president right now. Like do it now. Do some crazy shit. Do it, yeah.

Well, he can't roll back Roe v. Wade. I know, but it's like, just Do some crazy shit. Do it. Yeah. Well, he can't roll back Roe v. Wade. I know, but it's like just try. You can't bring it back. See what you're doing. No, there could be a federal, this is what I think a lot- Trump would try to do it. I don't think people understand, and I hope this doesn't sound condescending, but because if you looked at the results, Harris was losing

anywhere from 12 to 30% of the voters who voted to codify abortion rights in their state, but also voted for Trump and voted for Republicans in Congress, which tells me that abortion is a big, big, big, big concern for people. But a federal mandate is a federal mandate and your state's rights don't mean shit. Yeah. So you voted in people who want and have said they want a federal ban on abortion. So codifying your state's rights doesn't mean fucking shit. No. And that's, I don't know, that's a head scratcher.

I guess I lost you there. So you're saying people voted for- Depending on what state. A number of people voted for- Trump. V voted for Trump, voted for Trump and Republicans, did not vote for Harris, down ballot, but also voted on the- To make abortion legal. Yes, in their state, if it was a proposition. Yes, that is crazy. And there were 10 states, I think that there were 14

that had that proposition. Wow. So, I mean, I don that there were 14 that had that proposition. Wow. So, I mean, that, I don't know what to say to that. Yeah. I don't think people, I mean, I guess that's just civics. Sure. Uh, lack of. That's yeah.

Just the idea of like, um, drive to a different state. Like it's not, I'm like, is a 15 year old that needs an abortion? Like they live in central Texas, like I can drive to fucking, what was the nearest one, like Kansas for them? Yeah, no, not Kansas. Oh sure, I don't fucking know. I mean fucking.

No, I think that's where, that's why we need to get high speed rail going in this country. I like that, yeah. So the 15 year olds who are raped by their stepfather can get an abortion and, you know, can get out of there quickly. It's they, they go up to 300 miles per hour. And also from LA, LA to Vegas, that's going to be

a fun trip just for, you know, for all those people. Yep. Abortions in that LA to Vegas. If they can do abortions on the train. Ooh. And they'd be quick too. Yeah. It's a fast train. It's fast train. They go up to 300 miles an hour. So. And they'd be quick too. Yeah.

It's a fast train. It's a fast train. They go up to 300 miles an hour. So that's it. We'll have abortion trains. Abortion trains? Yeah, that's America's new. That's a really good idea.

Yeah. Abortion trains. Yeah. And then, or how about this? How about Planned Parenthood buys a cruise ship? Okay. Massive. Carnival.

Fun time. What band is going to be the, who's going to be the band for the cruise ship? Well, let me keep, let me keep filling this in and then you can decide. Okay. And, uh, and then it's just for abortions, you go out into international waters. Oh. So you have a cruise ship that takes, you know, every 10 days, right? And it goes out, you just fill it up with all the girls from, you know, Iowa and Missouri and Florida, et cetera, et cetera, and Texas. And then they go into international waters and then the doctors

can perform abortions on them. But we're going have to, so we're gonna need to disguise this so these kids can get on the ship without telling their parents, in case their parents are like, no, you should keep the kid. So it does need to be some sort of party cruise that they won from a local radio station. They're like, oh my gosh.

Are you 15 and pregnant then? Come on, come on, teen moms. Get on down here. Teen mom cruise. Yeah, it'll be like a Guns N' Roses reunion. That's what, you know. That's huge. That would be. Yeah, it'll be like a Guns N' Roses reunion. That's what, you know. That's huge. That would be. Right.

Shitty parents would be like, fuck yeah, you gotta see Guns N' Roses reunion. Yeah. All under the guise. I'll go with you. That's a problem though. I'll go with you. It's just for a 15 year old girl.

So, it's gotta be, you know. What's the Korean? Oh. BTS? BTS. Yes, you're right. Cause the parent would be like. Bachman Turner's silver BTS. Yes, you're right. Cause apparently it'd be like, look.

Bachman Turner's silver drive. Yes, BTS. This is a really good idea. Okay, cool. Let's get on it. Yeah, disguise a cruise. You email in, they'll call and be like, congratulations. And then, you've got this backstory.

Yeah, well, you could actually, that could be a side gig for you, is being the DJ voice. The DJ for the, for the, sounds, sounds like it's gonna be. This is Q107, it's Kaylee Reese there. Congratulations, you have won, Kaylee is not really a thing,

a trip to see a BTS, your dad is invited. For those who haven't surmised, we are recording this the day after the election. What if it was three months after? Still talking about it like that? No, because then the price of eggs would have dropped already. We would be great with it. How many eggs do you think you'll buy? I'm probably going to hoard them for, you know,

cause he only has four years. Maybe. Yeah. If you think that's a really happening, that's not happening. No, he's, he's not going anywhere. Even if there's another person in the seat, it's not, he's not going anywhere. Well, the egg prices are only when he's president, that's only the time they're done. Yeah. Yeah. It's just like the. Well, the egg prices are only, when he's president, that's only the time they're done. Yeah, yeah, it's just like the guns thing, you know,

like I've mentioned this before, but you know how, you know, a lot of people vote quite often on single issues. Gun rights, abortion. Yep, economy, come on now. Eggs for you. And immigrants, and mine's about eggs. And, uh, the price of eggs is very important to me. So that if, even though I know that, uh, you know, multiple people will suffer,

uh, serious consequences, I, when I weigh it out, I'd like cheaper eggs, please. Absolutely. What, how does this affect me right now, not later, or anybody else right now? I want a cheap egg. Here's the thing that's gonna be so frustrating is waiting for January 6th. Do I not buy any eggs until January 6th?

You go on an egg strike. Well, not an egg strike, just like, I know they're gonna be, like if you wanted to buy a car in September, right? But you know that cars, they'll lop off five grand at the end of the year in December so that they can make their commissions and all that final stuff.

Would you still buy your car in September or do you wait until December? Well, they're not going to lop off five grand in the scenario that we're talking about. They're going to get rid of like 20 bucks off that car price. So you got, do you want to wait for the, and I think you do. I do want to wait. Yeah. Yeah. It's important to me. Yeah, no, it sucks. It's, but like, I'm like, I feel numb to it, like really a little bit,

just kind of like, yeah, fuck. Well, that's because we know what we're getting. We don't have the shock of it's what you said. Like there's, I'm not surprised in any way that this is a clear, this is who America is. Yeah. And, and I, I remember, oh God, uh, I want to say three specials ago. I want to, I think it was when Trump first started running when I was, I think it's making America great again,

that tour, that set, whatever that special. And there's a thing where I say, we know that at least 25% of the United States is racist, blah, blah, whatever the bit is, it's, it's a, it's leading up to the bit. So, um, and I remember I had said, initially I was saying a third and I thought, you know what? That's too harsh.

I remember for real. And I was like that, I don't want to say a third. I don't, I don't know that that, I mean, definitely 25% is, but. Right, 100%, 25%. And it's actually closer to 50%. It's over 50, he got 51%. Well, there are a lot of people who didn't vote. Sure, you're right, you're right, closer to 50.

Closer to 50, yeah. What I remember, if you went back to January 6th, 2021 and you told yourself, he's going to be president again. I just remember when that was happening, thinking, at least we're fucking done with this guy. I really felt that way that day. I was like, this is bad, but you can't come back from getting cops killed. He absolutely did. Oh yeah. Well, he's the one who said early on, like I could shoot somebody on Fifth Avenue

and I would still have plenty of fans and voters. I mean, has to be the greatest snake oil salesman of like, I don't know, at least a hundred years. I mean, he's been president twice. It's really hard to do. Yeah. That's not an easy job to get. Yes. I give him more credit for the first one because the second one, he had put into place

all the mechanisms to allow himself to get, and he just scared people. And people, And he, and people, it's, it's amazing that somebody who's such a whiny little bitch about everything has so many people kneeling down and kissing his ring. Like, what are you scared of? This guy. I flipped out like. He's not a Don.

He thinks he is. Right. He likes it. But what, I mean, these are the biggest pussies I've ever, soulless. So I grew up in Iowa and like in 2000, when he was trying to win, like guarantee Iowa, he gave Dan Gable, the presidential medal of freedom. Like Donald Trump, this is mid COVID,

we're losing our minds, we're voting. It's like, I was just out of it. Just so they're just like, this has to stop. Like this dude in COVID, it's too much. And he gave my favorite childhood hero, Dan Gable, presidential medal of freedom, who Dan Gable was this Olympic champion, like coach at the University of Iowa,

just like my whole life. I'm like, Dan Gable, that's the guy. Like posters of him all on my fucking wall as like a kid. And Dan Gable, who did work really hard, became an Olympic champion wrestler, like was this fantastic coach, like raised Trump's hand up, but he got it. He goes, now this is a winner right here. And I'm like, no, he's the op, like I respected you.

He's did the opposite of you. You worked really, really hard and you're like train hard, work hard. You can achieve your goals. This fuck cheats so much. And like it, it broke my brain to where I went off on Dan Gable on Twitter. And then I just started going off in Iowa. I was like, and fuck Slipknot.

Slipknot fucking sucks. Like, and then my brother called me in the morning. He's like, hey, you gotta take that shit down. Well, there's one good thing about Iowa. And that is the, I think it's in Iowa city, the, um, George's tavern that has the steamed cheeseburgers. What is that? Uh, it might not be an Iowa city.

Cause I went to school there and I would, I'm pretty sure I would know about. It's a hamburger again. Number two. It doesn't matter. No. I'm also might not know. I want to say George's and it's, I think it's Iowa city. That's where the school is, yeah?

Yeah, I mean, it could be. Also, I just went to college there and when you're going to college or you're not like eating out a ton. Oh dude, this is like, they're a dollar 25. This is like, I'm sure I've been in there. Like, Biden prices.

I mean, yeah. No, they're like really cheap. I want to say it's George's. It's a great old kind of small divey bar. And then they have the steamed cheeseburgers. Oh, okay. If it's a bar, yeah. I think I meant like a restaurant. Then I'm sure I did this.

Yes. Iowa city is the fucking best. Yeah, I like Iowa city. It's the, my favorite, like maybe city in the United States. Cause it's like where everybody goes to be like, wait, this is like, we've been lied to. Like, it's just like this liberal little island. It's fucking great. Yeah.

That's where the tattered cover bookstore is. Is that right? Once again, I did not, I was just drinking a lot. I was drinking so much and I wasn't hanging out in a lot of bookstores. Now, but you didn't pass it on the street or make- I didn't, dude, this is very real. I didn't know Iowa had a writer's workshop until-

Oh, the, it's famous. I found out because I played a guy at Iowa in Girls because she goes to the writer's workshop and she had done SNL and she knew I was from Iowa. She's like, my character's going to Iowa next year in the show and I was like, for what? And she's like, you write his workshop. I next year in the show. And I was like, for what? And she's like, you write his workshop.

I go, we got a, we had a what? Like I didn't, I was very tunnel visioned when I was there. I'm just- Yeah, no, it's very- Very famous, yeah. Renowned, yeah. And the guy, did you ever read Anatomy of a True Fact?

Is that the name? Oh shit. It's awesome. It's amazing. It's awesome. It's amazing. It's a, it's a, one of the writers is a, I believe, professor and teaches at the writer's workshop. Oh, see.

And at Iowa State. Yeah, I went to see, I went to college for biomedical engineering. So I was just like in the engineering building the whole time. Right. Or drinking. Right. There's no really middle ground. Well, you could have bioengineered something in between.

We chose not to. Oh, okay. So you know how chlorophyll works and all that? I mean, no. Used to probably. I don't know what bioengineering. I made heart, I worked in heart valves after college for a while. Oh wow. Yeah. That's how I moved to Los Angeles.

Oh, that's like a natural progression in the standup. Well, I was just doing engineering all day and then standup all night until I got to quit engineering and just be, then went to do. But you wanted to do biomedical engineering? No, when I was like 17, I was like, I'll be a doctor. You know, like we all do.

And like a good- I never did that, not once. I did, I was like, I'll be a doctor. And then a good pre-med degree is biomedical engineering. You get that as your undergraduate. It helps get you into med school. But then when I was like a month into college, I was like, I didn't be a doctor.

I'm not that smart. And then I fell in love with standup and I was like, oh, I'll just finish engineering while I do standup on the side and use it to like slingshot to New York or LA. Wow. And then I did that. It's not a common path. No, no, yeah.

So then I did it in LA for four years and then things worked out. And now you're sitcom ready. Same, I got SNL from that job. I quit my job to go do SNL. But you called your job? You just did the phone. I got the call that I was on SNL

and I was like, I gotta quit my job. And then I was like, I was getting demoted that day because I had been gone a lot. And then I went and told my boss, I was like, actually, you don't have to demote me. I quit right now. And he was like, actually, you don't have to demote me. I quit right now. And he was like, fantastic. And then like two weeks later,

I was like on the cold open of SNL and they're like, what the, like, do you not know how to act? I go, I never fucking said I knew how to act. I was an engineer two weeks ago. Wow. Wait, SNL said that to you? Oh yeah, they're a little like, what are you doing?

I'm like, I don't know. So, well, walk me through that. You went, so you got hired by SNL. Hired to write for the show. And then a week before, I was there for three weeks. And did you put a packet together or? No, they saw me do standup. And then I just auditioned through standup

and was like, I'll just be a writer for the show. That'd be great. And then a week before the show started, I was there three weeks writing, like pre, the pre, all the commercials. And then a week before the show started, I was there three weeks writing all the commercials. And then a week before Lauren's like, you should be in the cast. And I was like, oh, great.

Of course, I'm dumb enough to be like, of course I'm ready. And you weren't, and you knew you weren't. Well, I didn't, I'd never seen a fucking TV show taping. I've never seen anything. And then the first time I'm ever, then I'm in the first, I've never seen SNL, I don't know what's going on, then I'm in the first, like I've never seen SNL, I don't know what's going on.

And I'm like the first guy to talk in the cold open. I was like, I'm not ready. And were you bad? I wasn't that bad. I just, I went and talked and then I went and stood in the back and I didn't know what to do with my fucking hands. Cause it was one of those like political rallies

where I came up and I had like a thing to say and then went back. I was just spent like eight minutes being like, where the fuck? Where'd my hands go? Yeah. Should this one go here? And then that was for the dress.

And then we went up and the only thing that got changed from dress to air is they cut me out of the fucking sketch. Yeah. They're like, you're not in this. I go, oh, okay, okay. Yeah. And did you get back on ever? Yeah, I got some fun stuff on.

By the second half of the season, I was having a good time. Yeah, okay. But that's for sure. And it's a lot, that's a lot to jump into, get thrown into, sure. But- And what year, who was the cast?

This was like a long time ago. They had like, it was me- Brooks, can I tell you something funny? Yeah. I had no idea you something funny? Yeah. I had no idea you were on SNL. I wasn't on very much. I know, I mean this is. Why would you know?

Good point, good point. Yeah, like I crushed it. We've talked a bunch though. We both go to the same bar. Yeah, I try to make it, I try not to. I talked about it a lot for probably the year after I got fired and then was like, I gotta stop talking about this fucking place. Yeah. But yeah, I talked about it a lot for probably the year after I got fired and then was like, I gotta stop talking about this fucking place.

Yeah. But yeah, I did it with like, my roommates were, our dressing roommates were like Beck Bennett and Kyle Mooney. We came in the year that they brought in a bunch of new fucking people. And then a bunch of us got bounced. Yeah. But yeah.

I've worked with Kyle too. Kyle's the best. Yeah, he's great. Kyle's so funny. Yeah. Like unique in a way that I'm like, dude, you don't have to worry about shit, you're the best. Yeah, he's great. Kyle's so funny. Yeah. Like unique in a way that I'm like, dude, you don't have to worry about shit. You're the best.

Did you see his movie? The- Y2K? Or Brigsby Bear? Brigsby Bear. Yeah, I love Brigsby Bear. Yeah, I like that. But he's got a new one coming out about Y2K.

Okay, yeah, I like Brigsby Bear. That was fun. Kyle's the man, yeah. And he was just so mellow and easy because he just, he's got that, he had that confidence that you need there that I was freaking out. Where is he from?

Southern California, San Diego. Okay. Yeah, he's great. Yeah, I liked him a lot. I mean, the cast is always fucking phenomenal. Yeah, that's like my little, I also put up a lot of barriers for that show to get to me now, you know what I mean?

Because I just don't want to know what it's up to. Kind of hurt my feelings really bad, you know? How long were you there? Only one year. Yeah. And then if something does get through, all of these muted SNL on Twitter, it's a really popular sketch, you know?

And the ones that are coming through that I'm seeing now are all like, I'm like, there's not a cast member in this. It's all famous, very famous people. And I'm like, know how talented the cast is. I'm like, you're telling me you can't find anybody in the cast that could do that? Like we could.

So I was just like, cause I would always be annoyed when they would bring in a famous person. I'm like, they don't fuck with work here. You know who wasn't the host. Yeah. So, I don't know. The cast rocks. Yeah, they're, I mean, that's one thing. And you have joined a long list of people who were cut after a year. Absolutely. Yeah. No, it's like-

Challenged people. Yeah, it just took a second because it, you know, it's like my first, like, it's like a big old people. Yeah. It just took a second because it's like my first, it's like a big old failure when you're, it doesn't seem like it, but when it's you, it feels like it. Of course. Yeah. No, I understand that. And the highs must be so high and the lows must be so low. Yeah. I just did Seth Meyers like this week to promote the special. And my girlfriend came with me and it shoots the same floor as

SNL tapes and I was like, I cried in that bathroom. I cried in that bathroom. I cried with a wig on right there. Yeah. Okay. We got a new sponsor, PrizePix. Okay. So PrizePix is the best way to get action on sports in over 30 states, including California, Florida, Georgia, and Texas. And PrizePix is the only real money daily fantasy platform with an injury insurance policy so that your lineup stays in play even if one of your players gets injured. If your player leaves in the first half and doesn't return, PrizePix keeps your lineup live. Oh, and PrizePix now offers Venmo for quick and easy deposits and withdrawals. Into your account this sports season.

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And I actually use it. They had a box here at the at the head gum offices here in Union Square in New York. And I I like free shit and I just turn it and I use it and it's good. And it tastes good too. I mix, I just mix mine with a little coconut water and a little farm fresh yogurt drink from upstate and a little dash of crystal meth. And then I mix it up and I power it down

and I feel good at least psychologically. I think I'm doing the right thing. But I do like it. And I take it out on the road with me too. And right now AG1 is running a special Black Friday offer for all of November. AG1 is a daily health drink packed with nutrients to help alleviate bloating, support sustained energy, and whole body health. Yeah, so you can get it as a powder and a big thing and they have the measurement scoop in there, or they have the individual packets,

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check out www.drinkag1.com slash senses to see what gift you can get this week. That's drinkag1.com slash senses to start your holiday season off on a healthier note while supplies last. Promote the special. Oh yeah, I have a special coming up. November 12th, Alive in Alaska. It's just an hour standup that I did in Anchorage.

Oh, we talked about that when we were at the bar. Yes. Okay, yeah. I also liked the guy, what's his name? Barry, the guy who did your artwork. Oh, Barry Blankenship. Yeah, Barry Blankenship. He's the best.

I had him do my poster for this current tour. He's the best, yeah. And then you poster for this current tour. He's the best. Yeah, and then you feel, do you sell them after the show? Yeah. Awesome, and like, I love selling his art because I'm like, this is good art. Yeah, yeah, he did a great job. And yeah, so you went to Alaska.

Went to Alaska, did two weeks of shows. I love this idea. Like all over the place. Yeah, I went to like McCarthy, then Juno, Sitka, Cordova, Fairbanks, Telkina, and Sultana to kind of build, basically I just wanted to write five minutes about Alaska, if I'm gonna be there. I was like, why the fuck would I not have Alaska?

But I was like, you need to spend some time in Alaska, otherwise you're just writing hack jokes. And then yeah, the opening of the special is just like five minutes on that experience. But you shot it in Alaska? I shot it in Anchorage. Okay. Yeah. And I shot all of that other stuff,

all that other footage, because I was like, this could be a cool like companion little travel. I love it, yeah. But like, it's not that interesting because we're just fucking traveling the whole time. Everything's really far. So we don't sound like we were doing anything doing anything fun. It was just a lot of

us in the car being like, what? 500 miles? And what time of year did you go? September 15th through the 30th. That sounds like it's pretty nice. It was really nice. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I've been to Alaska a bunch. I really like it. Have you ever done shows up there? I've never been there. I'd love to. It's pretty cool. I was really nice. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I've been to Alaska a bunch. I really like it. Have you ever done shows up there? I've never been there. I'd love to. It's pretty cool. I think it is literally the only state

I have not been to. Really? Yeah, in fact, it is the only state. That's, yeah. That's it. I'll put, if you want to do it, this place in Anchorage is rad and it's good. What is it?

It's called the Bear Tooth Theater. Okay. Yeah, it would be so fun. Yeah, no, It's called the Bear Tooth Theater. Okay. Yeah, it would be so fun. Yeah, no, I would dig it, I'm sure. Yeah, you just built, like go up there for two weeks, but don't do- Two weeks? I'm not going there for two weeks.

I'm saying you go up there, but don't do a bunch of shows. Cause yeah, I love it up there. Yeah, I have friends who've been there and, you know, talk warmly about it. I'm sure, like, visually it's stunning, you know? Yeah, it was great. Wait, I just had this, I remember like, so we, I see you at this bar

that my girlfriend lives above sometimes. And I have a story I wanna tell you. What's your girlfriend's name? Lee. Lee, right. Which is really cool. But one time we were taking mushrooms and we were gonna go to the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens.

And I was like, cool, you know, we took some mushrooms, like this will be fun. And then she was like, you know, taking a second to like get ready. And I was like, I'm just gonna go down to Hartley's and get a beer. And I go in. It had the mushrooms kicked in yet?

No, and it was empty except for you and your wife. And I came in being like, David, what's up? And then sat right next to you guys. Oh, you apologize for that. And I was like, you don't have to apologize for that. And then like 10 minutes in, like you guys are just having like a nice little talk. And then I'm just sitting next to you.

I'm like, I'm just gonna freak out a little bit. Oh, mushrooms. Yeah. I was like, I was going to the trees and I'm just sitting next to David Cross being like, I shouldn't be sitting this close to him. This is weird. That was fun. I remember it, cause the next time I saw like, I was going to the trees and I'm just sitting next to David Cross being like, I shouldn't be sitting this close to him, this is weird. That was fun.

I remember it because the next time I saw you, you apologize for that. And it's, you know, when you're tripping, quite often you'll say, hey man, sorry, I'm tripping. And I was like, oh, I had no idea. Yeah, no. It was, anyway, that was like a fun. I was just like, what the fuck?

Why did I sit right here? I was supposed to be looking at trees. You're, uh, but you're going to be. Yeah, no, we went to the trees and it was great. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know what, uh, I don't know what being at Hartley's is going to get you.

Um, pre tripping and going to the potato. I was just needed to get out of the permit. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Yeah. I and going to the potato. I just need to get out of the permit. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Yeah. I get that too. But yes, Alaska fun. You should go, I've been, yeah, three times. I love it.

And how long is the journey there? The travel. From LA, it's not that far to like Anchorage. Usually like have to connect in Seattle. Right. So it's just like Seattle and then probably like five hours, no, maybe four hours.

That's not too bad. No, it's not bad at all. I guess from New York it'd be pretty expensive. It would be a bitch. And you probably still have to go to Seattle and. Yeah. Yeah. But the Seattle Alaska airport hub

is fucking wild because it's a lot of dudes about to go up to oil rigs for the next three months. Oh wait, you mean it's a special part of SeaTac? There is. It's like the Marine terminal at LaGuardia? Maybe, but it is like a- It's its own thing. It's not like its own thing completely,

but like everybody there is about to do the same thing. They're all on the same plane to go to the same place. And so they're regulars because they do it, you know, like one month on, one month off, like go to like Dead Horse and like do fucking drilling and shit. And they're like getting really fucked up like before they get on the plane. Why not? No, I know. They're like, the plane guys are nuts. Yeah. They gotta go live in the dark for a month. Yeah.

And drill oil. Or Deadly's Catch. Yeah. They gotta go live in the dark for a month. Yeah. And drill oil. Or Deadly's Catch. Yeah. Going crabbing. I actually said no to a show on the island where that is, it's called Unalaska. It's like way out in the Bering Strait.

And they were like, we'd love to have you. Cause I was just putting feelers out to do anywhere. But they couldn't promise I would be able to get off the island within time to shoot the special on Anchorage. Because of the, you're like, you could get weathered in. Yeah. Yeah.

And I was like. I was, long time ago, I had this idea. It's kind of similar to the Alaska thing, not whatever. It was, I was going to do it as a Kickstarter, tried to do it through Kickstarter, to go to McMurdo, uh, station in Antarctica and shoot a special just in like their cafeteria.

That's really fucking cool. It's, uh, much harder than you would think. And the, the, there are a lot of issues, but the single biggest issue is getting stuck there and not being able to get, uh, come in or come out. And that was, you know, I, I had, uh, talked to somebody, uh, who was a journalist who was, uh, knew somebody at the state department who was like, I

think we can get you, you know, that stuff was, there was a, a kind of a lot of hoops to jump through, but you could jump through them. But then you know, that stuff was, there was a, a kind of a lot of hoops to jump through, but you could jump through them. But then when it got down to it, it was like, you, the plane goes to, uh, um, and you have to, like, you sit around until you can go. And then you sit around until you can leave.

And it's not just you, you need a fucking crew. Yeah. Cause shoot, that's what like, cause the two weeks I did with like, these really small towns, it was just me and a camera guy. Yeah. And we were miking ourselves.

Cause we're like, this is running gun. But then for the real special, you need fucking. Yeah. More people. Yep, a bunch more. Dude, have you read that book about McMurdo? I forget what it's called, but it's just this, I'll look it up and send it to you.

It's just this really good, kind of like one year there and all of the romances that happened, the fights and the internal politics. I feel like I read something about it. Maybe that's what inspired me. This is, you know, Werner Herzog did a, shot something down there too. Oh, I am, yeah. Went down there.

But I definitely read something about it that made me think to do this. It didn't just pop out of the blue. It was like, I read some article or, what was the book? I can't remember what it was called. I bet I read an excerpt, maybe in, maybe in Harper's or something. Yeah, Johnny Pemberton was like,

you're going to love this book and he likes cool shit. So I was like, I like Johnny. So yeah. And then I read it and I was like, this is fascinating. And like, he wants to make like a movie. Like he's like, this should be a fucking movie. It's just like, you're just stuck with all these other, like really smart people.

Yeah. Yeah. And, and, and stuck is correct. Yeah. You know. So you just, you wait for windows to get in and out. Yeah. Well, that's what ultimately, that's where it was like, I can't, I can't do this. And now I have a kid.

And so even. I mean, that's like how that fucking Ocean Gate was rocking with it's going down to see the Titanic. Like you have to hit the right window and you just sit down on that boat. What? Yeah. You know, the submersible exploded? Oh yeah.

That was one of those things where it's like, you go, you sit on the boat and if it gets good, if everything has to go right, then you drop down, but you're there for like, I don't know, a few days like on either side. Wait, what? Yeah. You have to wait for a window to be able to go down to the Titanic and like-

Because of what is the window? Because the water is all fucking crazy in currents and shit and weather and stuff. So it just has to be perfect conditions. And they like, you know. Weather I can pretty much tell you it's gonna be wet. That I can guarantee. I think it does.

Yeah, anyway, they, you know, chanced it on like, we don't know if this is great out, but some people were like, I really want to see it. Like I've come like twice. So, I didn't know if this is grayed out, but some people were like, I really want to see it. Like I, I've come like twice. So, uh, well, I didn't know that. I didn't realize that. Um, well, also I think like with the currents,

because if it is cloudy down there, you can't fucking see it, you know? Right. So it's just blowing all sorts of shit around. Right. Right. How far down is it? 30, 40 feet.

No. But it's cloudy. So you down is it? 30, 40 feet. No. But it's cloudy, so you gotta get in that submerged. It's not 30, 40 feet. No, thank you. I don't know, like two miles? I don't. Shit. No, it can't be two miles.

It's two miles. That's too deep. Yeah. So somewhere between 30 feet and two miles. Okay. I'm in the middle. I feel comfortable. All right.

I did, I've been scuba diving a bunch and I, yeah. And the craziest experience I had was I was in the Indian Ocean and, and they were like, it was like a friend of a friend of a friend who knew, who had these, we were staying out on the, um, on a beach and, uh, and this guy did dives and stuff. Expat, uh, this is a Mozambique and, um, what? Yeah.

And, uh, and so we're on the boat and I'm with a friend, this person from this group who I've known for only the couple days that a bunch of us were together. It was two friends who were in the Peace Corps. Okay. And Amber and I went to visit them. And so we did all these things for two weeks in Southern Africa. Yeah.

And I was the only one of the group and this girl who had her license. Yeah. And so we'll go. Yeah. And, uh, and so they will go. Yeah. I love scuba diving. So go and the couple that are running it, we're all like suited up and getting ready to go. There weren't more than 10 of us.

Uh, and then the guy's kind of freaking out and his energy is weird. And he's like, all right, uh, we're going to have to do a, what was it called? Uh, uh, uh, something I'd never heard before. And I mean, I'm not that well versed. I'm not trained to teach people how to school, you know, I've just done it.

And, uh, he's, we're going to have to do a, uh, a negative, it was negative something entry. And I'm like, what? He's like, guys, we have, we have to do this now. And all of a sudden everything kind of changed and the energy was really kind of scary and like, what? And I don't even know what he's talking about. He's like, going like, okay, we're going to line up, sit on the sides of the boat and you're going to go backwards. And as soon as your tank gets water, you turn to the left and flip and you head right down, straight down. And you're going to go backwards and as soon as your tank gets water, you turn to the left and flip and you head right down, straight down.

And you're like, what? It's cause of currents and stuff. And we're like, what? I don't even know what he's talking about. And then, you know, you see people do it and there's no time to discuss. It's just, you know, I'm the fourth person there. So they're going in, they're doing it.

And I go and do it and I head straight down. You have a dive partner, right? So this girl is my dive partner and we get down there. Also, I am very good about regulating my breath and I can stay down a good couple of minutes longer than some other people. Cause I don't, you know, I'm regulating my breath and you know, it's one of the things they teach you. And I head straight down, I find her, uh, and then

almost immediately I lose her and I can't, I don't know where she is. I don't know what's going on. Is it like dark water or? Uh, it's cloudy. It's, uh, it's, um, uh, I think also we all just went, we're going straight down. So I think we all make, but because of the

currents, we're getting separated. Yeah. And I, you can't tell that you can't see it. You can't feel it. And then, um, I'm, I've got, I don't know, five minutes, maybe less in my head. Like I can, I got to look for, I got to look for, if not, I got to kind of cut bait and whatever. And I'm spending some time and I'm clearly not, I don't see people in the group.

I see the, one of the guys, the and I, and I checked my tank after I'm, I'm telling you like five minutes tops and I've, I've burned through half of my fucking stuff and, um, and he gets me and he, and he's, we're going up together. Uh, you have to stop deep down where you guys, not that far, maybe 30 feet to two miles. Yeah.

I honestly, I don't, we didn't really lose any color. So it wasn't like, I'm going to say 40 feet, not a lot, not huge. Maybe, maybe a little bit more, maybe 50, but certainly no more than that. And then, and then I'm sharing his, I mean, it clearly was longer than I thought, but it just felt so quickly and panicky. And then I went up, because I explained to him what the deal was. I pop up and he's like, you know, go, uh, go, go up and then the boat will, you know, just stay

there and the boat will find you whatever. And, uh, he goes back down and, um, so I pop up and the boat is a fucking mile away. And in that time, so the boat is like anchored. I'm fucking so far away. And it was, it wasn't, what was scary about it was this guy's energy. Like guys were gonna have to go do a negative entry

and you know, so what, what is that? I don't know. They're like, sit here, go in the tank. We gotta go now. We gotta go now, go. You know, now, go. So that kind of already got my... And also when you're out of the United States, a lot of times it's not as strict with the waivers

and the safety precautions. That's what I realized. Well, that was a safety precaution. Right. It was, if we had decide, if we had, you know, just like lazily gone in, I mean, we would have been scattered. Yeah. For miles.

But maybe you shouldn't have even gone in at all. True, true. Like, I'm just saying like, I don't know, like outside of Orlando, they probably can't really, can't go in right now. Well, I was, I think nobody else had an issue, if I remember correctly, it was just, it was me and I. Well, it also sounds like it only happened

because you were worried because you lost your partner and you were trying to like make sure she's all right. Yeah, and there's a point where you just have to like, I got lucky that I found that other guy And there's a point where you just have to like, I got lucky that I found that other guy because I would have, you know, I would have checked my, you know, and you have to, you know, you can't like just shoot right back up, right? Cause you don't want to get the bends.

Yeah, the bends. And so you have to, you know. Did you watch that documentary, the cave about, or the- I didn't. How they rescue those kids, the Thai soccer team? Yeah. Fucking crazy. I didn't see it, but I mean, the story's nuts.

Yeah. I mean, I didn't realize what they were really doing. Well- Until, like, I watched that and was like, Oh, this is impossible. But Elon Musk said they were, he was a pedophile, right? Yeah, forgot about that part. Yeah. That part's not in the documentary, but I know that they're just, it's for Disney.

You get to call heroes pedophiles, right? If you, and what was his reasoning for? I think he was trying to create something like- Oh, he was gonna go save them, right? He was trying to like build something that explained that was gonna like go down there and get the kids and have them in a little fucking trap or whatever. And I think-

A trap? Yeah, straight up, to bring them out. And like- Who's the pedophile now? Well, the guy was like, the main guy was like, that's not gonna fucking work, he's fucking dumb. Like, and then I think- Well, he also doesn't build things.

He has people build them for him. Reasonably, it was like, we have to go now and we have to do this. And then I think because he just dismissed him, he was like, he's just trying to bang the kids. Like so fucking crazy. Well, he's our new- VP.

VP and whatever. Secretary of treasury. I thought Trump was saying that he's gonna put, I'm gonna put fucking, private FK in front of all of the healthcare or something like that. Yeah, do it man. That's what people voted for.

Yep. Get rid of, uh, Obamacare. Yeah. That's gone. Um, what were you, what's Mozambique like? I've never been to fricking Africa. Um, well Africa is huge. Yeah.

We were just in a. Little tiny little. We were in Botswana. Okay. And then, uh, and we went on a safari, which is remains one of the three coolest things I've ever experienced. Oh, it's the best. Dude.

It's, it's. I mean, you. And then they let you kill stuff. Well, yeah. I mean, I, uh, yeah, I killed my girlfriend, uh, and, um, and they were cool about it, covered it up, just gave it to the lions, the body. No, you go and we were there for a couple nights, a couple days and nights, it was fucking amazing. Just amazing. And we were in the Okavango Delta and yeah, I think three days, three nights. And then we also went to Namibia. Oh, we went to, fuck, we're, oh, god damn it. What's the place with the-

Victoria Falls? Victoria Falls. What's the place with the, the. Victoria falls. Victoria falls. What? That's Tanzania. Is it Tanzania? Okay. So it's, so we.

I mean, it's Lake Victoria is like on the edge of that. Yeah. We went to, um, uh, you know, what, what is it called? The devil's seat, the devil's port. The devil's pool. I've wanted to go to that my whole fucking life. Yeah. I lost my glasses.

Really? Yeah. Well, dude, I've just looked at it because that's another thing that I was like, sometimes the water's too high and you can't fucking go over there. You got to go there? Yeah.

You have to go kind of walk along, go through these rocks and kind of walk on these wooden poles and things. Did you have to like fucking reserve it or you just rock out? Like, I want to go to this place. No, you go, you go, there's, there'll be a guide. He gives a guide, you know, whatever you'd negotiate. And then he basically, you know, you follow his path and, uh, and, you know, it's not easy,

but it's not hard. And you just are kind of crossing this river-ish thing and then you get to the devil's pool and, uh, and then you're hanging there, all those famous pictures where it looks like you're. Fucking going to pull it off a waterfall? Um, yeah. And then I lost my glasses.

That seems like one of the, that's also a terrible place to lose your, you're like, I want to see right now. Well. It's probably very beautiful. Well, I was able to see him for a while, but yeah. I'm fascinated by Tanzania and Lake Victoria and all that shit.

But wait, we went to the, where's the place that, I'm just spacing on this, that had the crazy inflation where they have the $5 million bills or whatever. Oh, I don't know about that. What is that? It's Mugabe's? I don't know. Not Zaire, Zaire?

Zambia? I mean, I don't know. Yeah, maybe it was Zaire. $5 million bill, that was pretty good. It's worth a lot of money. It's worth a lot of money. Bring that to the United Yeah, maybe it was Zaire. Well, no, no. Five million dollar bill, that was pretty good. It's worth a lot of money. It's worth a lot of money. Bring that to the United States, it's five million dollars. Five million dollars.

And everybody's trying to sell them to you. It's because their inflation has gone down, but they still sell them as like novelty items. Yeah, I remember I went, I was in Berlin, shooting this thing and my friend who was the director, we were like, went to the wall and they were like, you can buy a piece of the wall for 50 euro and I was like, fuck yeah.

And then we had this- It's not a real piece of the wall. So then we brought it back, excited to the hotel and there was our German like fucking, German dude was like, you did, we bought sidewalk guys. And we were like, wow. How could you not know that? You live in New York.

Look, I know, but like me and my buddy, we gas each other up. We were both like, I want the wall. He's like, I want the wall. You know, you're with somebody who just talk each other into it. Do you think they have enough wall to sell to every tourist since what, 1989 or whatever the fuck it was?

Here's how dumb we also were. There was another place they were like, we'll stamp your real passport with the Checkpoint Charlie stamp for $5. And we wanted that. So the Checkpoint Charlie is where you went from like East to West. Anyway, so we just ruined our own passports,

made it look like we were going to East Germany in the fucking eighties and also bought Sidewalk. But we convinced ourselves, it was like regular Sidewalk wouldn't have spray paint on it. Okay, this is graffiti from the wall. No dude, we were so, we got back and we were just like. 50 Euro. I'm not even joking.

We got big pieces and then like we're too embarrassed. Flew home with them, flew home with it. And like still gave it to my girlfriend at the time. It was like, I got you a piece of the Berlin Wall. And then like later I was like. Did she know? Wait, did she go like. I think she was like, why do I want this? I was like, I don't know. I'm just trying to pawn it off. It's not even fucking real.

When did you realize it wasn't real? I think like walking away, we were like, I don't know if we should have done any of that. Oh, but that's even worse. Yeah. You went right up to the point where you gave them 50 euro. God damn it. We just gas each other up. We're like, this rocks. Nobody's going to believe we have part of the wall. I certainly wouldn't believe you. Yeah, no, you shouldn't have. Um, that's fun as hell though. Devil's pool.

I want to go so bad. Yeah, it's, uh, it's pretty, I mean, the, the actual, uh, um, you know, safaris is, is just one of the coolest. Yeah. Scary, a little scary sometimes, especially at night. But you know, you get a good guide and it's just quite a unique experience. Yeah, that sounds rad.

I was just on this camping trip with my friend. We did like this bike packing trip and it was like an overnighter, we're just us solo on these bikes with our gear. Going to where? We went through the Donner Pass. We were like, let's go do this, sounds interesting. So we were like reading about the Donners,

like where they fucking, it all went down. It was really crazy. But there's this place called Bear Valley that we were camping that night. And I was like exhausted. We'd ridden like 40 miles and it was like a huge elevation game, like 8,000 feet. And he was like, all right,

we gotta like throw our gear up in a tree. Like we gotta do all the shit. And I was like, do we have to? And he was like, it's called Bear Valley. We have to. It didn't just come up with that name, dude. Yeah, I mean, it just will get dumb sometimes. It just got lazy and dumb.

Like, I just go to bed, man, it's fine. Did you, did you or were you tempted to eat your buddy? No, but we talked about it. Like, would you or would you not, if someone died, I'm like, for sure I'm munching. Yeah, I'm munching. Absolutley, I'm gonna get in there.

You know that great fuckin' Python sketch where they're lost at sea and they talk about eating and which one they're going to eat. And then the person who they were like, well, we wouldn't eat Jones. He seems a bit gamey and he gets insulted. And then you just find out they haven't been out there that long. That's solid. Three days. It's been three days.

This really happened in the daughter party where they hadn't been gone too long, like not long enough, but they'd started kind of eating some people. And then these people, like people who had died naturally. And then this group went out to try to get help. And there was, you know, like eight of them or something. And one of the dudes was like, I'm too hungry. We gotta draw straws.

One of us, one of us got to die. So the other one's- I'm too hungry. Straight up. I mean, they are starving. Yeah. And they have been doing cannibal shit. Yeah.

But like, they hadn't killed anybody yet to do it. Right. It was- This guy was like, we gotta start killing each other. And they were like, fuck. Like, you know, they're like crazy. They're dying. And. It was, yeah. This guy was like, we gotta start killing each other. And they were like, fuck, ah. Like, you know, they're like crazy. They're dying. And they're like, okay. The guy whose idea it was drew the short straw.

Oh boy. And they're like- Wait, this is, how did they know this? This, well, some of these people survived. Ah, of course. Like half the people, daughter parties survived. Oh gosh. And so they were like, okay, we're gonna kill you. And he's like, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, we're going to kill you.

And he's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, nevermind, nevermind. That's a really bad idea. And then he's like, I'm not that hungry. Yeah, he's like, I'm not hungry anymore. Not hungry anymore. And then he went to, he's like, kill me in the morning. Like, let me have one last night. And they're like, okay.

And they like agreed to this, you know, nobody's using sound logic. Well, that sounds like, I mean. We're gonna be asleep tonight and kill you in the morning? But. I mean, okay. What happened was they woke up and they're like, we can't kill, we're not gonna kill that guy.

But he'd spend all night being like, they're gonna eat me in the morning. He had, he lost his mind and went crazy. Yeah. And just ran off naked. Why was he naked? He took all his fucking clothes off. He got like hypothermia and shit.

Oh, well. Yeah, I mean, it just sounds like the scariest worst. That is, to me, the idea of hypothermia, knowing what hypothermia is, and even if you wrote it on your hand, right? Yeah, you're like, keep your clothes on. Keep your clothes on, you're not really hot. Yeah.

Or you'll die. Yeah. Like if you had that tattooed and you would still do it like, oh fuck, I gotta- No, no, I was wrong. This is wrong. This tattoo is making me hot.

Yeah. Oh man, that daughter party shit, that's some, it's dark. Yeah. Real dark. Yeah. Well, of course. And then they all lived like in the same communities for the next 50 years.

Like who survived? Like fucking wild to be like, how are you doing? Yeah. And just like with a toothpick getting out. Oh, there's a little fucking finger. There's a finger that's been in there for a couple of weeks. One dude like Keiselberg like fucking was just killing kids straight up. And he, you know, they didn't, nobody got in trouble for anything that happened.

Like they didn't. And the dude was just living around San Francisco for the next 30 years. It's crazy. Wait, wait, I'm sorry. He was after or just during? During. Like he was like, you know, like couldn't be proven, but they were like,

my child's like, so like he's weak. And he's like, let him sleep in bed. I'll keep him warm in bed. And woke up kids super dead. He's like, I'm eating him. Like that sort of shit. And were they staying in the same place just waiting for help or were they, they were?

They got kind of spread out a little bit. Okay. Cause like one of them tried to go in further. And also all of this is because they, a guy knew a shortcut that was not a shortcut. So that's how they got fucked. And yeah, they were just a little spread out. So it was like kind of two camps, one's by the lake,

one's over in like Bear Valley where we were camping. And they're going back and forth being like, do you guys have like fucking a saw? We need a saw. And they're like, we want sugar. So they're like kind of two factions and then. And how big is each party? Like 50 and 40 or something.

It's like a hundred people. Right. Yeah. It was called the indifferent stars above us. It's this book that's really good. And it was fun to read like while you were there. Yeah. Wow.

Yeah. Um, I'll have to check that out. It's good. It's, uh, it's wild. I mean, it sounds like it. Yeah. But also it's like early Oregon trail shit. Like, yeah. Yeah. True pioneers, pioneers of, uh, well, not pioneers of cannibalism that have been around a bunch. Yeah. Um, but didn't invent that. Yeah. No, can't lay claim to that. No. All right. But I, I want to know what your favorite,

so you said top three coolest things when one of them was like this safari, which I wanna go on. What were like two other things? Oh, God, I mean. I mean, I'm not putting you on the spot like top three all the time, but like, that sounds incredible.

I wouldn't expect you to be like, safari is one of the coolest things. Oh, it is so cool to be in, I mean, this isn't like a nature safari where you get in your car and you go, I mean, you're, you're, you're with a guy that is from there and, um, a tracker knows all kinds of, uh, skills that, that are fascinating.

Like, you know, the knowledge. It's usually like a history dude. And like. Well, not even just that, but like, you are fascinating, like, you know, and the knowledge. It's usually like a history dude. And like. Well, not even just that, but like, you, you're, you're, you're, you know, in a sense in the middle of nowhere, right? And, uh, there's no roads, there's no, uh, amenities, there's no markers, right? So he, you can be in, uh, a field, you're, you're a field, you're in the,

you're in the like, uh, those like open jeeps with a big, uh, snorkel things on it. Cause sometimes you go have to go through water and, uh, and there's no, you, he knows where he is. Like how, how do you know we're in an open field and I can see there's a big termite hill. There's a bunch of, sometimes you see like these 12 foot, 14 feet termite hills and, uh, uh, but there's no marker. There's no like street

sign. There's no telephone pole. There's no, and he knows like here, well, even though there's no roads, right here, we want to take a right and go like another, and he's it's, but he was right. You know, it was cool. And then you're like hanging out with, um, you know, like there's a lion right there. Like I, that's eight feet from me. That's fucking crazy. And, and every, you know, crocodiles and, uh, and.

The baby hippo moodang. Uh, the hippos were, we were actually in a boat at one point and the guy, I guess we went kind of where there was like a little cove and inlet and, uh, uh, we started to go in there and then he very quickly, he's like, that's a baby. That's a baby. We got to be very quiet and we got to leave and don't look at the, and it, cause the hippos are, are the most deadly.

Like, there was like a fact I got in like second grade, there's like hippos kill more people than bees, you know, and like, I'm like, what? Yeah. Cause I seen my girl and that thing, bees kill kids. Yeah. Hippos live in Africa. Well, yeah, hippos, they'll come if they sense

that you're a threat to their kids, you know, whatever their pods of those kids are called, they will come and just, I mean, they're ferocious. They're big. Yeah. Dude, I'm about to do 18 days down the Grand Canyon. Like I can't wait. Yeah.

I leave in February. Nice. Like that's when I'm like jazzed. Is that a boat and horse and hike and all that? No, we just get in all rafting. All rafting. Rafting down the Colorado River. 18 days.. Oh wow.

Yeah. It's like we're getting in at the furthest point away you can and getting out the last point. So I'm like, I'm just gonna stoke to be like no service for like 18 days. Yeah, I did that. That's great. Bob Odenkirk and I hiked the Inca Trail this summer.

What? Yeah. How many days? Four. Dude, I wanna go to Patagonia so bad, but I understand this is not Patagonia, but that sounds incredible. Yeah. Well, I mean, it's hard. It's definitely the third day, which everybody tells you is like, that's the motherfucker is a motherfucker and it is fucking hard, but you do it and then it's just stunning the whole way through. Yeah.

Very beginning like, meh, you know, but you're in the big, you're at the lower part and then very quickly it's just, and it's nonstop stunning. And, and, and you, and you go through different kind of geographical zones and you're, uh, when you get to the end of the, there's a four day hike and a five day hike where you stop after four day, you do these two passes,

dead woman's pass and, uh, and, uh, it's, you know, a lot of straight up and then straight down and straight up and you're at one point 14,000 feet above sea level. And it's not easy to breathe. It's not. And, uh, but you, and it's a full day. Like you get, we get up at 5 AM and be walking by

seven and then you're kind of getting to camp 12 hours later, basically. And, uh, but the third, the night of the third day when you're just fucking exhausted, uh, you're at the, what they call the city above the clouds and you were literally above the clouds. You're at these peaks and It's just one of the most beautiful things you've ever seen. That's fucking cool above the clouds So I have this idea for a podcast the reason we were doing this Donner party thing seems kind of similar What you and Bob did me and my buddy Carl want to go to every national park and do their hardest hardest thing That's doable. It's kind of similar to what you and Bob did. Me and my buddy Carl want to go to every national park and do their hardest thing that's doable. It's a bitch, but it's called harder than we thought.

And we just want to go and do this trail, which like, it's doable, but it's not easy. And in the moment you're like, what are we fucking doing? And then when you're done, you're like, that was like the most fun thing I ever did. I truly believed after that third day, and I was like, if you told me I had to do this again tomorrow, I'd say no, I'm staying here.

There's no way, um, you know, for, there's no way in or out except for walking. There's not, there's no option, but, uh, and you have to walk the trail, but, um, when I was, when we were done and I was like, I just want to get a beer and I want to take a shower and, uh, cause you're filthy, you know, and, uh, and all those little things. I want a pillow and, um, and.

After we'd done it, I was like, that was amazing. I'm glad I did it, but I would not do that again. And then I don't think I was three days removed from it when I was like, nah, I'd do it again. Yeah, that's exactly it. No, I know what I'm getting into. Yeah, when we came out of that Donner thing, like we'd done like 70 miles on our bikes,

which isn't that hard, but it was just, you know, we're just- Well, that ain't nothing, 70 miles. And going up, like going up 8,000 feet and like, but we're filtering all our water out of like streams and stuff and we're just eating like dried meat and ramen. And I was just like, I want a fucking Coca-Cola so bad. Like, I just want it.

Sugar, like my body was like, ah, and it was like the best Coca-Cola I'd ever had. I brought beef jerky from, it's the best beef jerky in at least the continental United States. Where's it from? Alpine Worst House in Honesdale, Pennsylvania. Really? Yeah. And I, it was the hit of the, like our guide. That's fun.

You know, it was like, you know, David, I'd like some more to the beef jerky, you know, like the beefed beef jerky. Like, yeah, have some. And I gave them a pack at the end as, uh, you know, but I went there specifically. I'm going to load up on this cause it's so good. I'll be king of the king of the camps. Yeah. And, uh, and I,. And yeah, we had a lot of beef turkey. That's great. Yeah. I mean, the shit that I'll eat camping, that I think tastes so good. Yeah.

At home, I'd be like, I'm never gonna be eating this, but dude, ramen. A lot of trail mix, lots and lots and lots of trail mix. So good. I got to fight with Carl because he's 40 and he calls it gorp still. Gorp. I remember that. I'm like, Carl, I can't fucking go anymore. He's like, eat some gorp. I got a fight with Carl. Cause he's 40 and he calls it GORP still. GORP. He's like, I'm like, I can't fucking go anymore. He's like, eat some GORP. I go, don't fucking call it GORP.

Cause GORP stands for good old raisins and peanuts. I'm like, you're an adult man. It's trail mix. Yeah. Ugh. Yeah. It's also like the fights that you get into on like a camping trip that you look back

and you're like, I was really actually mad at you. And it's kind of funny now. We didn't have any, yeah, we didn't have any of that. We, also because there's no, well, there are other people there, but also there's no, no time. You just, you can't, and they will, the guide told us numerous times, like, stop talking. You know, you need your energy and your oxygen. You can't stop. We're not, no talking for the next, you know, and we're just cracking jokes and dumb shit like that. So, I mean, over this, over this hour, you found out I did Saturday Live. Yeah. I found out that you scuba dived up Mozambique,

done this crazy fucking Inca trail, been to the devil's pool. Yeah. Like, it's fascinating. I, you were like, I didn't know you were such an adventure dude. I mean, I'm not... Not a lot of people do the Inca trail, Mozambique, scuba diving, want to do standup in fucking Antarctica. You're interested in traveling.

Oh, for sure. Yes. That's what I'm saying. Yes, yes, yes. And I really want to, you ever read any Bill Bryson? Oh yeah, he's from Iowa. Oh right, that's right. Yeah. The first page of his first book

is what turned me around on him. Cause I was like a little like, I hate when people complain about Des Moines because I'm like, dude, Des Moines is a big city. Like I wish I was from Des Moines. And his first thing he says in his first book is I'm from a really boring place. I'm from Des Moines, Iowa.

And I was like, fucking this guy. And then he said, the only good part about being from Des Moines, Iowa is that I'm not from anywhere else in Iowa. I go, he gets it. He absolutely gets it. Right. He absolutely gets it. I love that dude.

I've read, the first one I read of his was Neither Here Nor There. Ooh, I don't know. It's way in an early travel. Okay. It's after Notes From a Small Island, I think. Okay, cool. It's after notes from a small island, I think. Okay, cool.

And, but he goes to, Hamersfest Norway, which is the northernmost point of Europe in the Antarctic circle to go see the Northern Lights. And that chapter, you know, it's a long, cause he, it's a, it's his traveling all over. And that, and I've read this a long time ago, but I was like, I'm doing that. I'm going to do that.

I want to do that. My favorite is his is in a sunburned country. I didn't read that. It's just about, it's just like, uh, uh, American's point of view on like the history of the culture of Australia. Australia. And he's like, I like that dude because he's like, looks at it from our point of view. And I was like, this is kind of weird shit,

that stuff that people think is normal. I was like, I don't know. Like, I just remember this one thing where he was like, a prime minister went out for a swim. The prime minister of Australia went missing. Like in like the fucking seventies, just went missing, never found his body. And like people in Australia,

like don't even really remember it. Like imagine- Was there foul play or just- No, just went off for a swim, deadly current, fucking gone. But like, they're like, yeah, it happens. Like if a president in the seventies

drowned in the ocean, we would, it would be a big fucking deal. I read, I don't know if this is a joke or not, but it didn't seem like it, but that the explanation for their accent is because they're squinting all the time. That's hilarious. That can't be true.

It, well, if you, oh, now I'm doing it artificially. Like your voice takes a different, you know. I mean, I had a roommate from Perth and my way to get into, cause I, my Australian accent before I knew him was really bad. It's still not good, but it was, you know, the Steve, everyone like, Oh, I, Oh, that's a cop.

But then the, my friend from Perth to get into his Australian accent, I would always start, he just starts every day, every, everything you say, he responds with easy, easy. Like, and it's just his way of being like, chill out, chill out. Like, no matter what, he's the most mellow guy I've ever met. Shout out to Zach. Easy. Yeah, but I...

The... I would say culturally, the craziest, hardest drinking motherfuckers I've ever... Yeah. ...been around are Aussies. Yes. They're fucking nuts. They fucking... And they're fucking nuts. Fucking. And they vacation a lot. Yeah.

I'm just saying, I run into Aussies everywhere. And it's like, oh, these maniacs. Yeah, they're living the good life. Yeah. Brooks, thank you so much for coming down. Yeah. I end every episode with a I end every episode with a question from my daughter who is seven. Here we go. Great.

Brux, what would happen if there were no people on earth. Um, well, the, there was a show about this. Like if people went away, what would happen to the buildings? It was like on the history channel. It was called like, if humans disappear or something like that. And what happens in every one of these episodes, according to history channel, uh, all the animals get out of the zoo and they're the now in charge of that city and the city has vines all over it. Like for real.

And each one they're like, welcome to Chicago humans. When extinct 30 years ago, a giraffe roams the road. Oh, because the giraffe was in the zoo. Yeah. How did they get out of the zoo? How did they get out of the kitchen? I guess the monkeys. The monkeys did.

The chimps. Yes. Ah, yeah, yeah. the monkeys unlocked them all. The zoo takes over the town is what I found out. Okay. And are there new breeds happening or are they all just within, breeding within their own? Well, they, you know, the adventurous ones are,

are, you know, seeing what's up. Progressive ones. Progressive ones. Yeah. Yes. But, you know, can't have children, doesn't work that way. So yeah, like zebras and actually zebras and giraffes.

I don't know how interspecies babies happen with. But you're a biomedical engineer. I do heart files. Oh. I don't do biology. Shit. Yeah. Well, so yeah, the answer is the animals get out of the zoo.

That's all that happens. And the vines. Vines grow up on all the buildings. Okay. Lots of vines. There you go. All right. Well, thanks for coming down.

Thanks, David. All right. Sense is Working Over Time is a headgum podcast created and hosted by me, David Cross. The show is edited by Katie Skelton and engineered by Nicole Lyons with supervising producer Emma Foley. Thanks to Demi Druchen for our show art and Mark Rivers for our theme song. For more podcasts by Headgum visit headgum.com or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Leave us a review on Apple podcasts and maybe we'll read it on a future episode. I'm not gonna do that. Thanks for listening. That was a Headgum Podcast.