Sex, Lies & DM Slides - 4: "Plough me like your farm" with Kali Sluzza

Episode Date: November 1, 2022

Ya girl Single Sluzza aka TikToker Kali Sluzza is on this week’s podcast. We talked about everything under the sun from best pickup lines that work while on a night out with the gals to crazy sneaky link stories. Plus Kali spills the tea on a raunchy DM with a dashing farmer - and that story alone is now living in our head rent free. And don’t forget to slide into our DM’s because we are LIVING for your messages. Sex, Lies and DM Slides is a Spotify Original podcast. Produced by Spirit Studios with Raymond Tannor and Kate Willis as the producers and from Spotify the Executive Producer is Rhyanna Coleman. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hey guys, I am Anastasia Kingsnorth and I'm Safran Barker and welcome to Sex, Lies and DM Slides. So each week we invite a guest onto our show to delve into their DMs, to spill the tea, to discuss sex, dating experiences and all of the topics in between the good, the bad and the ugly. However, today's episode actually I feel like was quite an uplifting, empowering episode. A very empowering empowering positive episode i feel like from today's episode i can now get any guy i want in the world and trust me when you listen to this you're gonna feel the same like you're gonna you're gonna end up leaving this episode thinking i can get the man or the girl of my dreams exactly and no dm is off limits and of course no topic is off limits and today we were joined by callie sluzzer who has taught us so many different things i feel so many things amazing she's told us how to pull

on a night out how to make the first move fake it till you make it there's a lot there's a lot fake it till you make it is the best quote actually i i love it anyways i seriously feel like you guys are gonna love this episode So let's just dive right in. Let's go. I'm going back to university for $0 delivery fee, up to 5% off orders and 5% Uber cash back on rides. Not whatever you think university is for. Get Uber One for students.

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Gambling problem? Call 1-866-531-2600. Visit connectsontario.ca. So online, you are known as Callie Sluzza. Yes. Why did you want to use that name? Where did that come from? So obviously Callie is like, that's my first nameie Sluzza. Yes. Why did you want to use that name? Where did that come from? So obviously Callie is like,

that's my first name and Sluzza. I've just said Sluzza since I was at school. Like me and my friends always used to call each other Sluzzas. Like, oh, you little Sluzza. I don't like that, you know. I've not heard it before. That would definitely catch on. I don't know if we picked it up from somewhere

or if we made it up. I've got no idea, but it's basically a slut but like a little slut i do know that's what it is no but that's actually it's like a cute way of saying exactly and i think i just started calling myself it because like all i talk about online is like sex and dating and things like that so i was like it's just kind of that thing of like i'm gonna call myself that before other people do just like as a joke i love that do you know what sometimes that is like the best way to do anything yeah in life like if you i don't know like say you fucked up on something and like you was the person that like mentioned

it first people then can't attack you for it because you've already like addressed it you know exactly so you just have to own it yeah exactly i love that i'm very curious how did you get into speaking about your sex life so openly i think i've always been like this like even at school everything i've always been so open um like i literally have zero boundaries and i get myself into trouble but um i think it was during covid i just started posting stuff I went through a breakup and I was like fuck it I'm just gonna be a real sluzzer now so do you think it was a breakup that prompted oh yeah I was just okay I'm just gonna I wonder how many what how many times we could say sluzzer in this whole take a shot every time we say sluzzer but yeah and then I think like my

first like TikTok that I made well wasn't my first one but the one that I blew up most was like I went on this really bad date in January it was just awful and I didn't know how to get out of it and this was when COVID was still a thing he was just boring and I was like fuck like I need to think of an excuse I don't want to sit here for two hours just to like you know be like okay bye so I went downstairs I got my friend to send me a text saying that i just tested positive for covid and i changed her name to nhs pcr test i went upstairs i was like hey oh i'm so awkward like i've just tested positive wait he was like oh shit like you're gonna have to go i was like yeah i am i put my mask on i was like yeah nice to see you like that is so funny and then that was like what what hit it off and then i was like actually yeah i will share more my dating life

i mean if that's a fun story to tell i feel like story so if you've always been open is that your family and stuff just quite open like yeah so like it's just me and my mum and my mum's always been so open like she's younger well she's not younger obviously than me but younger than my my friend's mum she's like 40 like young 40s that's like my mum so i'm really close to my mum and i think it's because she's young yeah so exactly i could speak to my mum like about anything even when i lost my virginity um i was like yeah mom i'm gonna leave my virginity today so could you like leave the house okay what was her reaction when you said that she said to me like okay like better you do it here than like in a park or something because this is my mom's thing my mom's always wanted me to be honest because she's like i'd

rather you like do it here than like go yeah exactly like yeah in a park or something because like as like teens you just back in the day i was just what you do like it's so bad you made me up at the park for a little kiss and she's just like okay well you know i had this chat like you're gonna use protection i was like yeah i know like i got it from school nurse already oh that's so cute i think like all parents should be more like that because i agree also if they are like more what's even the word like not allowing but no i think the like more protective they are the more you're going to rebel exactly 100 that is so true isn't it no 100 all my friends with the strictest parents i want to say came out the worst because that sounds mean but like

well like the yeah yeah they want to be rebellious because they know they're not meant to do it yeah exactly my mum just the same as yours is very like easygoing so i've never felt the need to like really rebel rebel yeah where to use but yeah i mean i still did all like the same things that all the rebellious kids did but i did it in a safer environment yes you know yeah yeah so your relationship status now what is that it's single yeah we're all single oh good single ladies it is the best i just think when you're younger like obviously i get into ins and outs like you do catch feelings like when you see from people sometimes but i just feel like you just have to be single like you prefer being single than a relationship have you been in relationships i've been in

like three long-term relationships from like the age of 13 to 23 i was in relationships literally me i've been in three long-term relationships and it's just yeah like you probably know when you're in a relationship when you're younger like you kind of lose yourself like you don't know you are like for me i'd be like oh maybe i should wear this because he likes that you know like just yeah but when you're by yourself you just yeah so you have to learn to love yourself don't you do you prefer being single definitely yeah really there are some times like when i'm hanging hung over on a sunday i'm like oh like i just had a boyfriend it would be nice yeah then then like two days go by i'm like now i'm ready to go yeah i feel you that's me i feel

like i'm in that phase of my life right now where I just like being single and going out and just you don't have to worry about like what are they out with the boys yeah like what are they thinking yeah and it's just it is hard work it's anxiety it's like oh yeah it's not a relationship yeah less stress yeah yeah yeah so do you go on dates a lot not as much anymore like I feel like first dates are so forced I really find them boring like you know you just sit at a table you're like so like um where did you grow up things like that I don't like getting to know people like that I like to do it naturally so usually I just go on nights out and just like meet guys that way and if I end up liking them then maybe I'll go on a date yeah with them that way but dating apps and stuff i just don't do you go on the thursday yes dating yeah because you posted

this haven't you yeah yeah yeah talk to us a little bit about this you need to tell us about this you need to give everyone context if they don't know what it is as well yeah this is so interesting i've seen it on posters but i don't know anybody who's actually done it so so thursday they're like it's only what the app only works on a thursday um and you're supposed to meet that person that you meet on the app on the same day like it's all to do with like spontaneity um because otherwise you sit and you chat to someone and then by the time you meet them you've made this like idea up in your head of who they are and when you meet up with them you're like oh you're not that person

and then it just never works out so i think it just has to be so you literally speak to them that day and meet them that day it's not like the following thursday it's that no that day you're like let's go for drinks now but they also do events so like i was gonna say i've seen this don't they do one on a boat yes this is my favorite thing yeah i have seen that i didn't know it was just a thursday thing it's so funny so i actually want to i want to do that because I think it looks so fun. We've got to go. I think it'd be so fun. Can we go?

I would be so down to go because I was staying in a hotel where like it overlooked the dock of where it took off. So I was watching all the people get on the boat and I was like, this looks like so much fun.

It's so fun. I sometimes use it as like a networking event. I like to call it because I just go around and get as many numbers as I can. So like, I've just got a nice like roster

of boyfriends. But like going to these these events do you actually think that people are seriously wanting to look for a relationship like no i think it's the same as and like just being on a dating app like i think i think there are people seriously looking for a relationship but there's also people that are just looking for like a one night yeah one night do you go with your friends yeah i go that's i mean i imagine that sort of thing you go with your friends like a fun thing and if something happens out of it then it happens would you go up to the people or do they come to you like a lot of the time people come up to you i did go up to people on there like actually i was just thinking about this earlier like one of the guys i met on one of the first thursday boat trips i kept looking at him and he

kept looking at me and i had to go up to him and go I'm not gonna lie like I can't I don't know where I know you from I can't think if I've shagged you before and just can't remember stop yeah and then he was like he was like no we haven't and I was like well yeah he's just got along with it it's so funny and then there's another funny story from that so that same guy we ended up not sleeping with each other for like a while and then i went on another thursday boat party i got with the dj on the boat party he came back to mine the other guy was ringing me the other guy was ringing me like hey do you want to come over i was like yeah but i've got the dj in my flat so i was drunk i went downstairs i go hey yeah like my brother's just called me and um um he's in trouble i know you're excused queen you've got excuses i love it you know you need to tell us because

we're gonna need them i just think of stuff really good on the spot i just like a chicken out like i wouldn't know how i don't know like i wouldn't have to get out of the situation yeah i wouldn't know how to get out of it so i need to take some advice because i don't know in my life they'd be like i don't know like sales i could go see my brother they'd be like i'll come too no that's the sort of thing that will happen to me oh do you want me to drop you off no no he actually said that because he was djing at the party he was sober so he drove to mine and then he was like do you want me to drive you i was like i can't get him to drive me to my new like sneaky links i'm gonna be like all right i've just i've ordered a duper already but that is so

funny okay we need to we need to make that become a thing oh we will 100% basically I think we need to go to a Thursday dating event we do all together we can go get a few drinks see who we can meet there's some good looking guys there is there are they like London businessmen

well this is the thing you have to choose strategically which one you go to because if you go to the one in the centreondon you're going to get everyone after work so if you if that's what you're into right suited no it's not what we want so you might quite like that really see no i would this must be the video that i saw of this and it was literally just men that like literally looked like they were all stockbrokers like that was it like there was just wolf of wall street that was it yeah like nothing else and i just thought everyone like almost looks the same and i was like that's just not a bit of me i don't think no so you got to go

one in like a different area like shoreditch maybe or something like that because i feel like it's fun yeah shoreditch is a bit better or we could do like a thursday dating event like bar crawls we just go to each one can you do that because they've got like they've got like 10 on during a night like all over london so we can just see like where the best ones are i can't believe i've not done this before i feel like everyone listening at home as well if you're single this is what you need to do with your girlfriends you do like a hundred percent all your girlfriends whoever and i've met a lot of friends through going to those events because there's just loads of like fun single girls there so have you ever been on a serious date with someone that you've met from one of these events um like anybody you've actually liked i have i have had a thing with somebody

for quite a few months but that's what i'm going to say but like a regular not the dj he um he did mess with me a few times i just thought i'll cut that one that one loose um but no there have been people from the events i have like yes been speaking to you for a couple months so but i'm still single love that so we're talking about making the first move in this episode so would you always make the first move do you prefer them to make the first move is the first move is in like a kiss or is it like going up to them at a bar let's do both so i i usually i will actually like i go up to people in a bar do you know what i would go up to somebody in a bar i don't think there's anything wrong with it if i fancy you you. Yeah, that's the thing

because I'd rather, if they're just going to be awkward about it, I'd rather just go for it. I'm not going to lose anything. Like, what are you going to do? I can deal with the rejection if you don't fancy me, fine.

Exactly. Everyone's got a type. If you don't fancy me, it's not to do with me. It's just... That's a you problem. Yeah, it's a you problem, not me.

I'll move on. But no, I've got loads of tactics that I use. Like, if I don't use these sometimes i need the help sometimes i do just go up to them and i'm like um i go do you have a girlfriend no do you fancy me yes do you wanna kiss yes and then sometimes we just kiss and then we go home together but other times if you're a bit more nervous

there's a sunglasses trick so this usually happens in a club you're wearing sunglasses in your head or at a festival and you go up to them and you like put your sunglasses on them and then or what i recently did at a festival was you know those portable fans like they're like the electric fans oh yeah so i was like perfect like i'll go up to people at a festival like give them a bit of air and then if they fancy me i'll start talking back i went up to a guy i love this i went up to a guy and did it yeah but the girl next to him her hair got caught in it he started going around and then i was like oh my god oh my god and then like the guy next to her i was trying to get the hair off he took his teeth and chewed off her hair like it's the only

way because we only at a festival i was like okay so yeah like never again so you didn't speak to the guy no i was like obviously this is too. But so maybe don't use the found one, but the sunglass one, or I've also done at a bar, I've been like, oh, I've taken an earring off and I've gone near them. I've been like, oh my God, I was sitting here earlier. I've lost an earring.

That is absolutely genius. I think Kim K with a diamond earring. I love that. Honestly, I've got so many. That is so good. Wow. I need to go out with you on a night out. Yeah, you do. Because I think I'm confident going out with someone on a night out yeah you do because i think i'm

confident going up to someone but i'm not doing all these no i've never met this level of confidence i love it you just but the thing is it's not confidence it's not me getting rejected that ever scares me it's like if they have a girlfriend yeah i'm just like or like if then there's a big group with them and then one of them ends up being their girlfriend or whatever yeah i'm like oh that's just that's awkward it is awkward like it's embarrassing and then the girls just like yeah sat there like fuming yeah so because you obviously go up to a lot of people in clubs and everything like that do you also make the first move online like dming people because we have this thing i get taken out of it all the time because i used to message guys a lot first which i've now realized doesn't actually work no

it doesn't work. No. Okay, so hearing it from you as well, it definitely doesn't work. One of my friends, she messages, she's got this line that she messages guys and I actually think it's quite good. I might stop doing it.

She messages them and she goes, ruin my life. Stop it. Oh no, but I've seen guys put that to me. No. Oh really? Honest to God has. And one of her ex-boyfriends,

she said that to him. Really? And that's how they got together. I kind of love it. I've had it a few times, but I do think it is good. Honest to God, has. And one of her ex-boyfriends, she said that to him. Really? And that's how they got together. I kind of love it. I've had it a few times, but I do think it is good. I'm recycling my hey you to ruin my life. That's what I always say.

She starts with hey you and I keep telling her she needs something more than that. Is it like hey space you? Yeah. No, like Y-O-U. I always spell it out. I keep telling her. You need to say something'm embarrassed i don't know just not that yeah or just be like you're hot i just feel like i told anna that she should like reply to a story so there's like context there's like conversation i think when you're just messaging someone like out of nowhere it is just a bit awkward it is awkward this is why i do agree

i'd rather send a post like if they've just posted or like a story yeah because then they're like oh there's like that's how i love sliding into my ex's dms to reply to a story your ex's dms yeah no not not because i like still like them just because it's like yeah i'm still here yeah are you friends? The last one, no. Well, some of them, yeah, not the last one. I saw them at a festival the other day. I was like, it's so awkward.

It was so awkward. But yeah, no, I'm partial to sliding into the next person's DMs. Have you ever sent someone a pickup line? No, I'd hate those. What's the best pickup line that someone's used on you if there has been any good ones because i personally just don't think there is no there's no good ones they're all they're all just so actually you know what okay this one is someone put the the emojis like of someone kicking a ball and i and then he goes hey sorry i just accidentally kicked my ball into your dms and i was like oh it's actually quite it's different yeah not seen

it before not seen it but i hate them i hate them yeah i just think they just they're just a bit they're a bit try hard yeah if i see a like chat line in my dm i won't reply i won't reply it's just i don't find them funny even on dating apps i don't reply to my chat, I don't find them funny. Even on dating apps, I don't reply to chat lines. No, I don't. Yeah. Do you? I mean, I don't really go on dating apps, but yes. So you've said on TikTok that you can pull pretty much anywhere. Yeah. So give us, you know, like a full, how are you going to pull someone in?

Let's give us an audio. This is with the tricks, right? Yeah. This is with the tricks. With the tricks. Like, I was literally in a restaurant like friday night no saturday night and i just went up to a guy at dinner table and i was like hey you're so hot can i have your number and he gave him to me really did you know

what confidence is the most attractive thing yes like naturally if someone's confident like they've they've scored so much higher in my book so what i'm saying like pulling anywhere like even if you're in like a supermarket and you saw someone you fancied i probably could yeah i'd probably be like oh my god do you know where the bread is and see what they say and be like you know and then also if they fancy you they'll you'll be able to tell do you know the break also what's your number yeah and also and what if i get lost like to the aisles like can you take me there what's like the weirdest place you've ever like chatted someone up i don't know probably like in in like a chinese at 2am and like chinatown like

i love going there like at the end of the night like if i don't end up like pulling i'll go to go to just end my night with chinese and then i ended up pulling in the chinese just this guy and to be fair never ending for you babe it's never ending it's constant do you actually enjoy pulling like do you go out every night like well when you do go out with the set idea of like i want to pull someone but it's like do you enjoy people also sorry i'm kind of changing yeah answer that but also what about like would you prefer people to still come up to you yeah i do i do go out but i just like going out with like my girlfriends and then i think it's just the not knowing where the night is gonna end like i just think it's so funny especially in london like you could just end up anywhere like doing anything like karaoke at 3am with like the new like love of your life who you fall in love

with and then you wake up the next day and you're like I don't love him like but um I do obviously I do kind of prefer guys coming up to me like it's more flattering yeah isn't it yeah but I guess like you're just like well I've got nothing to lose they're not going to come up to me or you know yeah my best shot exactly yeah yeah like if I, I've got nothing to lose. They're not going to come up to me or, you know, yeah, my best shot. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah.

Like if I, if I do find someone attractive and they haven't come up to me, I'm going to just go up to them. Yeah. Yeah. To be fair, when I was staying in a hotel the other day, the most beautiful man I've ever,

oh my God, he must've been like six foot five. Right. He came into the lift. He's, he was so sexy. Anyways, he worked in the hotel and I was like,

I just have to tell you like i think you are so beautiful i didn't ask for his number huh you said that to him yeah because i was proud of you just used to know like i mean he definitely he definitely knows yeah but i was like i'm just gonna tell him that i think he is because i just had to and i probably would have asked for his number but i was like i was getting out lift. And also it was kind of like he works in the hotel. And also the woman was another woman who also worked there was in the hotel. And then when he left the lift, I was like, oh my God, he's gorgeous. And she was like, I know. And she was like, oh, but you should have said more.

And I was like, it's all right, next time. I think it's like, I would find it difficult to, yeah, like speak to someone in the lift or like on a tube that's what i mean it was a bit like i couldn't unless i was drunk like i wouldn't go up to someone on the tube with the headphones on and be like hey like i find you fit you know i mean that's because also if i saw that on the tube i'd be feeling awkward i would be like that's i'd be giggling i'd turn my music down in my headphones so i had no music and i'll be listening yeah but yeah sometimes you've got to shoot your shot i guess yeah that could be the

love of your life you've inspired me i'm now like if i find someone attractive i'm literally just gonna go and tell them i find you attractive do it and it's actually like really empowering like especially if they're like yeah sure get my i'll give you my number yeah nine times out of ten unless they got a girlfriend they're probably gonna say yes yeah because even if they don't fancy you at the end of the day they're gonna give you their number because it's awkward for them not it's also just polite and yeah that's what i mean yeah and i think confidence does make you like 10 times more attractive but even for me with guys i think if you believe that you are that bitch they're gonna be like yeah okay yeah she is okay so just out of curiosity if a bitch, they're going to be like, yeah, yeah, she is that bitch. Okay, so just out of curiosity,

if a guy was to turn around and be like, absolutely not, like no, like it's a rejection, how do you deal with rejection? Oh, I'm just like,

you're lost. Has that ever happened? Has anybody ever rejected me? Like, no. Not in a horrible way. Not in a like, awful way.

But not like, the only rejection has been like, oh, I'm really sorry, I've got a girlfriend. I'm like, well, and then yeah and then i just walk away obviously yeah yeah but um i don't think there's ever there's been like rejections of like maybe i've gone on a date and i liked them and they weren't really feeling it then i'm like like stings a little bit if they ghost me or something but i always do just think like it is a them problem not me like everyone

in the world has a type. Yeah, 100%. I have to reject people, but it's not got anything to do with them. It's just like, maybe they're not my type personally. Like we've got different views or whatever. I don't know. Yeah.

So I just don't take it personally. I'm just like, whatever. Yeah. I love that. Yeah, I love that. Honestly, I'm learning so much from you. I'm going to go back to this hotel next time I say that i'm gonna be straight over like do you fancy me oh i love that babes you need to start using some of these as well i just i feel like i have a lot

of confidence on like dating apps but then when it comes outside of the dating apps i feel like i slightly struggle yeah but like i wouldn't be able to go up to someone in real life and be like hi i think you're attractive but i am actually going to try it now I think just like I think probably yeah the first couple times I did it I was like oh god it's so awkward but you do just especially if you've had a drink or tea yeah if I'd had a drink yeah exactly so honestly it's so interesting though, because I feel like you're clearly so good at dating. We'd love to see it. So we'd love to know what is like your wildest sneaky link?

Could you use that term earlier? Stories. Oh, I've got so many. Like that DJ one is pretty funny. I've got one which is like notoriously like the weirdest sneaky link story ever that I always tell is this guy we were sleeping together like but he always used to do this weird thing where I really liked him as a person like he was really hot he was a tree surgeon and I thought for some reason that was just a tree surgeon so he climbs up the trees and just cuts off the branches of trees that like you know i don't know to to you know i don't know i've had a tree so i know a tree yeah that's not a sneaky

link but like i have a tree surgeon in my house so i think like that's quite hot right so different but there's this weird thing where he was like he just when he was gonna like finish he couldn't do it probably he had to hump his mattress no and you didn't you sat with him multiple times like two or three times and i just and he did it all the time i know so bizarre did you ever question him on it yeah i was like why did you do that he's like i don't know it's just like something i've always had did you not say can you not i was like well i was like i don't know i'm a people pleaser do you know what i mean i was like go for it that is so bizarre so that's so weird i've got another one where happened more recently that one was ages ago that one that one is just so i couldn't even tell you what that what that means anyway and then i realized this is too

weird so he actually ghosted me i didn't even ghost him so i'm thinking he probably thinks like how can she like she's weird for letting me do that another one i had recently was i was in a club and the guy that worked on the worked on the door like taking people's tickets was really hot so i said at the start i was like hey like you're really hot like whatever i don't really know what happened throughout the night but i ended up because he was sober he had his car and he was like do you want to come back to mine i was like yeah sure like let's go back to yours he was going to drive me home but i was like why don't you just put the car down down there he turned the corner and we had sex in his car and then he was like do you want to um do you like do you still want to come back? I was like, no, no, I'm going to go back in, back into the club.

My friend, as I go back into the club, my friend walks out and I'm like, she's like, God, yeah, I'm going to go home. It's like, don't worry, my friend will take you home. I got into driver. I was like, you're going to have to take my friend home. Is that all right? He was like, yeah. And then you went back to the club.

I went back in the club. And then I had McDonald's. That is so funny. See, I feel too guilty i like i wouldn't be able to oh i don't know if i feel guilty necessarily but like oh yeah but if he's like do you still want to come back yeah i was like to do what i know like yeah i get already done you know what we're gonna what we're gonna do like yeah maybe you're just saying it's be nice as well yeah because he's probably thinking i can now do about this because what

am i gonna yeah yeah exactly so yeah and then he's driving my friend home so i mean that's a good drive your friend home yeah yeah maybe i should re no revisit that one yeah your stories are unreal i need to make these stories yeah you will you will you just i think also just like where do you guys live manchester yeah i live in brighton see i just don't know if in london there's just like just crazy things happen i don't know why really see our friend was saying to us that london's very like plain for dating i don't know about that yeah so we're getting two different like experiences yeah i don't know maybe I don't know but I know I want to go out of you exactly that's one thing I do know

I want to go on a Thursday night out with you yeah and see where we end up we will and then all of a sudden we're gonna me and Anna are gonna come back on the podcast and have all these white guys you changed women okay so what are your let's say essentials for a sleepover for sleepover like what things i bring yeah um always a hair tie because your hair is gonna look crazy in the morning when you're doing the walk show very true you know and it's better than bringing a hairbrush and if i bring a hairbrush i don't want them to think like what you're moving in but i don't want them to give them that impression really yeah i always bring a hair well not I don't plan it but like I always have a hairbrush on me anyway yeah if you've got one of those small ones then yeah but like if you're bringing a whole

sleepover like a big sleepover bag I'm just like I'm just are they thinking like I don't know I don't want them to think like yeah you know okay yeah I get you I don't know I like to bring a little small bag I like to bring my hair my hairband i like to bring sometimes you could bring a toothbrush or if you don't want to bring a toothbrush what you do is the toothpaste trick you just go into their bathroom and rub their toothpaste on your tongue swish it around and then like you're literally good to go um and then what else do i bring obviously protection lady you have to bring a bit of protection just in case he doesn't. And then that's, I mean, change of underwear. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. You know. I'm too much of an overpacker. If I know something's happening. I know. Babes, I've got a suitcase. You'll turn up at your store with a full suitcase. When we go to London today today I'm not kidding you

I have the world's biggest case with me it's so freaking heavy like if I was going on a plane it would say it's overweight and I've got a duffel bag and and Anna's come with her

tiny little carry-on and she's going away to Ibiza oh straight from here straight from here and she's got this little carry-on and I'm just thinking I am the world's

like no I cannot bring that I need everything what'm just thinking I am the world's like no I cannot bring that I need everything what would you take a toothbrush she'd take matching pajamas I need everything I need my matching set

she's bringing out the silk pajamas the usual laughing but I'm not you're taking your protein powder for the morning as well so I absolutely am

the thing that is difficult is like you know how am I going to be taking my makeup off like you do need to bring oh my god I never thought about that because otherwise i've had it before like i just wake up and i'm like oh so orange pillow or like mascara like everywhere i never thought about that i always try to leave my eyelashes on

no no i do because i do because in the morning i feel like i look so much just more like awake if i have my eyelashes on, I can't explain it. Oh no, if I woke up with eyelashes on, it'd make me feel sick. Yeah. Really? What if they're like crooked? Like they've come off half off? And aren't they like crusty when you wake up?

Well, I'm never going to know. I don't look in the mirror. I just left. Oh, that is so funny. Let's go. Prime Big Deal Days is coming October 8th and 9th Let's go. a new blender squeal or the infamous deal on a new massager squeal. Save big on electronics, fashion, and more this prime big deal days, October 8th and 9th. After decades of shaky hands caused by debilitating tremors, Sunnybrook was the only hospital in Canada who could provide Andy with something special. Three neurosurgeons, two scientists, one movement disorders coordinator, 58 answered

questions, two focused ultrasound procedures, one specially developed helmet, thousands of high-intensity focused ultrasound waves, zero incisions, and that very same day, two steady hands. From innovation to action, Sunnybrook is is special learn more at sunnybrook.ca special okay so our favorite time of the podcast is where we always get to look into our guest dms so if you don't mind i mean you honestly sound like you're gonna have i'm only gonna chuck out your phone and be like go wild yeah please show us your phone let's dive into your dms because um right i feel like can i just say something so you said you don't normally like message people first yeah okay so these are probably mainly gonna be messaging you this one i am beyond

excited you know i reckon i could spend a day going through your DMs. Honestly. That'd make me happy. I'd be sitting in bed like TikToks, but scrolling through your DMs. This one is so funny. Oh, here we go. Right. So there's this, there is this TikToker on TikTok

called Farmer Will. I don't know if you've ever seen him. He's quite big, but he's a farmer. He's a farmer. And he's like got all these sheep. I was about to say, is he the one with the sheep blind

sheep yeah and the one that came out the mud out of the mud that's him yeah blind sheep so and the funniest thing is i'm so not up to date with tiktok am i but i've seen this video it's so good and i was like once i made this tiktok i was like oh i love that man with with the sheep like because he's got a blind sheep called Bramble and then he's sitting have you not seen this guy? I'm so excited for this So this is with Farmer Will I'm going to have to watch his TikToks later

So he's put I've just seen that vid about Bramble lucky for you lambing season is just round the corner That is so good When you followed me I wondered if you'd seen it can i come and feed bramble please you're talking about blind sheep here yeah this is very odd he put oh now that's so funny though yeah you can there'll be lots of new lambs as well and then you put yay where is your farm and he put near oxford not too far from london and you put will you plow me like your farm after i cuddle bramble the thing is i rate that because that is so good

the thing is like here you can see his messages it's like it's a bit boring let's spice it up his first message he wanted to there was like intention yeah and then i was just like oh where's your farm oxford okay like you know let's just fucking plow me there okay then he put guess you just have to come and find out and he didn't reply i know because i was like that's boring it was like you could have there were so many things you could have put to that it's like yeah he had a really good opening see you on see you on friday yeah i mean so then i was just like love your message though wow do you know what i love that for you it's so funny um and then the next one which is this is i mean probably don't read you

know what you might be getting these messages from us now like babe what should we reply yeah i'm gonna send you screenshots like my friends always do that i'm like they're like oh my gosh what'd you say do you know what i always get i can always tell i really like someone when like i don't know what to reply to them because you know when you start second guessing everything you say i've actually that is so true i've actually had like my friend on facetime me with my notes app open trying to reply to a literal one sentence message yeah to try and make it funny we've done this so many times it's just and then and it is it's when you really like someone yeah and also i'm so good at giving you like if someone else asks you what to say i can tell you like that hundred things like that that's good to say and when it's yourself you're like oh see i feel like on the opposite

the things i've told you to say are horrendous i don't think I can do it for myself I don't think I've ever used the lines I go Hannah what should I say and she's like maybe this maybe this and I look at her and I'm like yeah I'm gonna say this so basically I need your help don't worry I'll help you I'll help you but this is this guy I won't say his name but he was on The Apprentice so just so rogue I love that show me and my friend we had noticed

that he'd also messaged one of my friends and I was out with one of my friends so we were kind of just joking around like taking the piss out of him he didn't

he didn't really realise right so he messaged first saying, like your TikToks. What are you up to tonight, daddy? You don't miss. You go straight in. He put making TikToks and working. No.

That in itself was such a tip. Yeah, that is such a tip. So embarrassing embarrassing come and make a tiktok with me tonight this is your response he put hmm maybe oh god really really i swear these guys don't get it you put and with my friend as well that you i'm with my friend that you messaged as well threesome question mark and he replied might as well make it four with person in back as well you said yeah okay the response is okay daddy and then from there we just like oh this is funny yeah have you had one with your mate before yes prove it prove it prove it like what is he expecting from you yeah like

that's so funny yeah that one's funny then we were just kind of saying piss off i just thought it was funny because he's from so like rogue from the apprentice but i just love how it goes from like zero to a hundred he's like you're like okay let's fuck yeah okay daddy so show me what you're working with and then the other one is like where is it he there's just this random guy who has messaged me about 10 million times like you probably get this where like they'll apply to every single one of your stories this is not one of those they're 268 of saying hey yeah exactly like or the same thing um actually the first thing he says is pretty good i should have replied to it oh we've got a roses are red okay i love these ones right he said roses are red you give me the buzz how can i secure a date perhaps drinks with the slurs

to be fair i really like that he must have see he sat there with his notes up open like face on his head he's pasted it over is that good or cringe because i don't know how i feel about that like it's good but then the fact that he's thought about it i'm like i don't know it's good but it's not a yeah let's meet up good yeah i'm gonna be like that's my thing you know but he's been replying to your story since he's like not stopping he says have you ever thought of starting your own lingerie brand because yes girl wish i joined you at king's cross you are so my type i don't i don't even know what that's about like king's cross what the station i don't know what did you go to king the picture's not even relevant the picture's you that's what i mean yeah i don't even live in kingscote it's like he then goes

okay this is so fucking hot fancy a date tonight in london what does can i root you mean i've got no idea can i root you but can i root you i've never heard must be some new slang sex or something and then we have got someone who's up for a threesome yeah callie you're up for a threesome tonight in angel with my friend it's my birthday tomorrow so let's rail yeah like what am i gonna say like yeah like okay he's not stopping yeah that was on sunday um but yeah i mean that's there's many more but those are like the best ones your dms are wild they are they are i love that i actually love that for you let's go okay so this week we've also asked our listeners about their wildest hookups so we're gonna read some of them out and basically i don't even know if if advice is the best idea because it's just

their hookups but let's react yeah let's react so she's had sex with two people in 24 hours one on the night out and then one the night after okay yeah that's all right i think that's quite a common thing to have like i personally haven't done it but have sex with like two different people even like it's in the same night no it's not like just the same 24 hours yeah she's not even gone from one guy to another it's a whole new day i'd applaud that you know it's a whole new day yeah yeah yeah it's fine i mean to me that'd be wild go on girl i've definitely done that many times also especially if you're in like ibiza on a holiday or something like that like i just i know when i was in cavos a couple of years ago one of my friends she had sex with someone in the

room then went next door and had sex with someone straight after no oh my god so it was within like the same that's the law within the same hour i actually have done something very similar you're like oh my god and they were friends so basically i was dating this guy and he invited me to come out with his friends but one of his friends is way better and the guy that i was dating this guy and he invited me to come out with his friends but one of his friends is way fitter and the guy that i was dating pissed me off why is that always the case by the way i know always always have fitter friends so i kept joking that i fancied this other guy and then he comes up to me at the bar he's like i actually fancy you as well and i was like oh my god we had a kiss outside while his friend was inside his friend pissed me off that night because he got this

list of all the girls that he'd had sex with and and added so many boys so weird no so many boys have that i mean i do have a list but only because i like to keep track of my body count you know i know through someone someone has a list and then like writes where the girl is from no next to their name i only do that if i don't remember their name like if i'm like guy from like jazz cafe and like in camden or wherever it is really see i think i couldn't be with someone who had a list no what a list of like names no if they had a list of names i just couldn't be with them i just don't think i could i mean i i can't really say anything because i've got one but it's but this is what pissed me off.

He got it out while we were together. That is so weird. He literally added you to the list while she was there. Yeah, he was like, look at all these girls. Oh no, that would piss me off. And he was like, yeah, I'm really like, I know lots about sex. I was like, fuck you. Like, I'm going with your best friend.

So we went. I don't bloody blame you. Exactly. I would too. So anyway, the bad thing is I actually went to his, back with the guy that I was seeing, slept with him. And then I realized I would too so anyway the bad thing is I actually went to back with the guy that I was seeing slept with him

and then I realised I was too pissed off got in the Uber to go home but then his friends started messaging me and was like oh um like where are you going

I was like I'm going home he's like do you want to come over so oh my god I slept with him as well love that babes I do not blame you for that

at all yeah because I was like fuck you so you should yeah there's one thing having a list in private but like saying you've got the list and putting your name on it in front of you

yeah like imagine me having sex i'm gonna go oh let me just put you on my list like it's just a bit yeah yeah that's plus like it's actually on my laptop which is really weird but i don't know why it's on there but yeah that is so funny okay so another one is i had sex with one of the doctors i work with in the office on the ward we work on that's pretty hard i mean i was about to say i think that's kind of hot yeah like that's probably a lot of people's i was about to say that's like one to tick off the list the friction between them two as well like all day at work oh my god it's like being at school like you know yeah that's like a proper like whole movie scenario i could foresee that and like yeah love that i love that for them i also think like they don't they work really long

hours like 30 hour shifts and they've got those little rooms that they go to sleep in as well like like during their break yeah because if you work in 30 hours you have like an hour break you want a little nap so it's probably just kind of love that that's so fun yeah like i said i think that's a bit of a fantasy so oh no i've got one more okay go on i think this was funny so they had a one night stand and then he just happened to interview her two days after for something no no that would that is a movie situation oh yeah i would then think to myself we're meant to be together no same because what is the chances like actually what i would be thinking something has put us together that is fate yeah fully i think we're just a bit psyched i think i think we just watched too many rom-coms yeah maybe no but what is the chances though I'd

actually feel sick if I walked into that room and I was like oh my god well I would as well I just know one night stand with them and suddenly they're like interviewing yeah like well yeah so what's your five-year plan and it's like me and you that's so funny okay so what is the best advice that you would give someone like after a breakup or after i don't know one night stand it basically what is your best advice for these situations i feel like we've covered so many situations it depends what about like approaching someone i feel like because that's what you're yeah i mean the best thing is all i I can say is, it comes from confidence. And if you feel like you're not confident, you just have to fake it till you make it.

I freaking love, that is my go-to quote. What fake it till you make it. You do. 100%. Like, you just have to, if you fake that you're confident, it just works. 100%. If you believe it, everyone else will. Exactly. Girls, I've learned so much on this podcast.

I love this. I love it. This has been, like i love this so girl like uplifting yeah you know my dating life is fully going to change we're going out after right after this we're going to we're going to a restaurant we're going to a restaurant we'll probably find ourselves in a bar do you know what you know what just for the sake of it right here if we drink tonight we've got less pinky promise on camera we're gonna go up to a guy yeah okay okay we'll do it whether it's a waiter or someone at a table like you did yeah yeah we will i'm gonna let you know how it goes oh well thank you so much honestly thank you i've actually loved this episode so much i've loved it it's been so much fun i feel like we've had so much advice yeah no thank you for having me thank you okay don't forget you can slide into rdms with your

own sex lies and dm slide stories for us to read out in the next episode if we don't see you in rdms then we shall see you next week sex lies and dm slides is a spotify original podcast produced by spirit studios with ray and kate willis as the producers and for spotify the executive producer is rihanna coleman Thank you. you you