Sex, Lies & DM Slides - 65. The Power of Female Friendships

Episode Date: March 26, 2024

This episode is for the girlies!! We don't know about you but female friendships have always been so important in our lives and in this episode, we thought we'd talk about all the amazing reasons why our female friendships are so special to us. Plus, we chat about the secret to long lasting friendships, the major differences between female friendships and male friendships and we ask: are our female friends really our soulmates?? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

let's go hi guys and welcome back to another episode of sex lies and dm slides with me saffron barker and me anastasia kingsnorth so we are back for another week and back for another opportunity to deep dive into all things sex and relationships first of all babe how's your week been my week's been all right how's your week been my week's been good my weekend literally spent like every other weekend getting drunk so i'm not gonna get drunk and i do end up getting drunk very hungover do you know what why not why not the thing is when you're saying this to yourself you know that you don't really mean it so i know i don't and it's not like you've said i'm not gonna drink for a certain amount of time and you keep doing it like you're just like i probably won't drink this week and it's when we record these episodes I don't actually

have plans on the weekend at this point and then it always changes after I've said oh yeah I'm not going to get drunk this weekend and then suddenly I've got an occasion to have a drink we went to Alton Towers which was a bit of a random one to get drunk at but they had a party for um the new like roller coaster that opened and there was so many people and I just don't even know how it ended up happening and then the next day I felt so hung over and normally like rides and everything like that do not bother me like I still went on everything but I was sick when I got off the last ride because I was like oh my god like you know when you just have that feeling like the sicky hungover feeling and I was like, oh my God. You know when you just have that feeling, like the sicky hungover feeling,

and I was like, I can't sit in the car all the way home unless this is out of me. Oh my God, that's horrendous. No, I'm sorry. I could not do being hungover at a theme park. And imagine going on the Smiler of a roller coaster, like 14 upside down loops whilst you're already feeling dreadful.

That is not it, no. It was really not it. But had a lovely time. I could not believe the queue times. I have never in my life seen anything like it. It was 275 minutes for one ride. Yeah, that's crazy. I was like, what the fuck?

Like, that is absolutely wild. That is absolutely crazy. Four and a half hours. I love a roller coaster, but I don't know if it's ever worth that. I would, I'm not queuing four and a half hours for a 30 second ride no it is actually crazy but well it sounds like a good weekend though aside from well kind of being hungover i think it's probably one of the worst things ever but what the worst especially on a roller coaster but it was fun it was nice to like get out and like go for a walk and like actually

be out in the fresh air that's not in a city so yeah lovely weekend what did you do this weekend honestly not that much so to be honest i didn't really have a great week but my week wasn't exactly how i planned it to be but you know what life goes on exactly onwards and upwards exactly but on a positive note um as it was international women's day recently we did actually do a question box on our instagram asking questions why female friendships are so important so we thought that's a nice positive episode to do today and something i feel very very strongly about we've got a few of your answers a few of you were like we have so much in common you can have no filter around them they're just people who understand you they boost your confidence which is so true absolutely there's so many reasons

that you guys gave and that obviously got us thinking about all the women in our lives and most importantly our female friends so we thought we'd sit and have a full conversation about that so why do you think female friendships are so important I think because I think your friends are like the family that you choose to have in life right and so I think the amazing thing about female friendships is I don't know for me I feel like I'm super lucky with all of my girlfriends I genuinely feel like I could tell them anything and I'd never have anything to feel embarrassed about yeah I'd never have anything to feel embarrassed about I feel like they'll always be supportive I feel like girls get each other like we all get each other you know um yeah that's the one thing I kind of

feel bad for like in guy relationships I feel like they have to obviously not all it's stereotypical but I feel like they have to hide a lot more of their feelings and they can't always say exactly how they feel and like I don't know lad culture is like awful in the sense of like different yeah and like a guy will do something wrong and all the boys be like oh yeah well good for you mate like yeah girls don't really do that like girls aren't saying oh yeah I'm really proud of you for doing something awful to disrespect someone else whereas guys would a hundred percent yeah I agree that lad culture stereotypically is just so much different to female friendships and like it's weird because a lot of my like immediate friends are guys but it's because they're gay so like I obviously have female friends but my friends group in Manchester is predominantly boys but like this is gonna sound like really silly but on Sunday Molly and Ellie

came to stay at mine and we were just speaking about sex right and it just was so odd because like having a conversation with them about sex is so different to me talking to my guy friends about it because they can't relate well yeah it's thinking about it I think I obviously don't forget they're your best friends and I love them too but you have boy mates because I don't have boy mates to be honest I don't really have boy mates so it's different for me like to me they are the girls like that we call each other the girls like but they're obviously not so like there's certain things that like they can't understand in the sense of like periods or stuff

like that what girls can relate to um and in the topic of sex like it is a completely different conversation having that with a girl and a guy um so even when i was just sat speaking to them about it because byron was also in the room and the next day he was like that was the most bizarre conversation you were having and i was like yeah but I was like that's a conversation that like I needed to have with just like a girl just so I could like I don't know like it's just it is just different yeah well and also as well it's different as well because speaking to a boy about something that's straight rather than gay is going to have a completely different opinion so like us us talking about sex with the girls again would be different with Byron then it would be I don't know like another guy who's straight right it's going to be a completely

different conversation a hundred percent and like yeah I mean I speak about I of course I can speak to all of them about any of that but I think just when you're speaking to a girl who might understand it a little bit more because they've like been through it. I think that's just something I think that is why like female friendships are also so important. I'm going back to university for zero dollar delivery fee up to five percent off orders and five percent Uber cash back on rides. Not whatever you think university is for. Get Uber One for students. With deals this good, everyone wants to be a student. Join for just $4.99 a month.

Savings may vary. Eligibility and member terms apply. The all-new FanDuel Sportsbook and Casino is bringing you more action than ever. Want more ways to follow your faves? Check out our new player prop tracking with real-time notifications. Or have out more ways to customize your casino page with our new favorite and recently played games tabs. And to top it all off, quick We'll see you next time. let's go let's like talk about our friendship with each other um and obviously how like we've been friends

now for god seven years seven eight years maybe yeah which is actually crazy and it's crazy because yeah like we met through social media which is I still think so wild and I feel like that is why like you meet everybody for a reason like do you know what I mean like say if I never started social media we probably never would have been friends if you never started it we never would have met like it that is just how it would have gone so I just think it's like you meet every single person for a reason um which is really lovely and I have gone. So I just think it's like you meet every single person for a reason, which is really lovely. And I love that.

And I think the reason like we've maintained such a strong friendship because I think we always have supported each other and we always take the time to make the effort with each other. And we live at opposite ends of the country and we could not speak for four days. But when we like if we do speak again it's like nothing has changed I think it's one of those things that it's like there's some friends that you have that you don't have to see for a year but when you see each other it's like you saw each other yesterday and I think they are the best kind of friendships because you know that

they'll always be there when you want them but at the same time you don't feel like you need to constantly like we all have our own lives like i am genuinely i mean i'm making excuses myself but i am the worst person at replying to anyone like i'm a terrible texter anna will vouch for me my friend jasmine's in my house she will vouch for me like i am just awful but i don't mean it intentionally i just we all have our own lives we're all busy people we have our own thing going on my friends know that it's nothing personal they'll call me I'll pick up the phone they have something wrong I'll be there for them um but I just think yeah they're the best kind of friendships that you don't constantly have to I don't know like constantly

be texting someone but you know you know that they're going to be there for you a hundred percent if i knew it was an emergency and i needed you right this second i would call you yeah i think i'm not going to drop that text because it's probably not going to get it straight away i just be there when anything like dramatic or like anything emergency happens in life we text each other that is true and it's capital letters and i am text i text you straight away yes you're not gonna believe what i've just found out but my favorite thing about that is when we do that i'll get that text and then i won't get a response for about 15 minutes no i know but yeah i'm pacing around

the house going right what is it what is it i'm trying to i'm trying to think of all these different things in my head like what's happened but nothing personal but nothing personal because you were dealing with something so nothing personal but yeah I think that is why like our friendships remain so strong because we understand that as you get and I think we've spoken about this on the podcast before but even as you become adults like adult friendships are different to teenage friendships because you do have your own separate lives and you have things that you just have to do like like so we live opposite ends of the country but when you love someone that you just have to do like like so we live opposite ends of the country but when you love someone when you care about someone that much you're going to make

any sort of friendship work and I think that is why it's so lovely like even our little routine now of like catching up before the pod and then coming on doing the pod and then seeing each other every couple of weeks like whether it's me coming down to yours or you coming up here I think it's just like the nice nice little like almost like routine we have that like yeah it's now in our like adult life what is something that you dislike in female friendships you know what not even that i've really i've experienced this more when i was younger rather than like in my adult years but girls can be very bitchy very bitchy I think more so than guys more so the guys I agree and I think I've had some friendships where I felt like they don't want the best for me and they would almost like try and sabotage if I was doing some like doing good in life and you know when you can just

feel that someone doesn't want that for you that I think that is the only thing I don't like about some female friendships it just feels a little bit bitchy what about you like what's one thing you don't dislike about them I would definitely agree I mean I had this one friend and I learned over time I would ask you know she's the sort of friend and this is the friend that I hate right that you would ask them what outfit you look better in and you know they've said the one that looks worse just so you go out looking worse they are the sort of friendships I hate um because yeah then that isn't a friend that isn't somebody that looks out for you and I had someone in my life who was very

much like that and in the end I ended up realizing it's funny how she says the opposite to everyone else like everyone else and like I yeah like to the point where like I would deliberately put something on that I knew would look worse than the other outfit to see what she'd say just to test the waters and she'd still say the one that looked worse and I thought I'm actually now seeing straight through you like as a friend choose the one that looks nicer yeah like we're not competition we're friends like we can all thrive together we can all grow together I don't understand I don't understand girls that don't do that but also that comes from a place of their own insecurities and their own hurt and so you know you don't ever know what

anyone's going through um and so obviously that's what causes that but it's really hard as like a girl's girl as a girl that would never ever do that it's so hard to understand and so I hate anyone that does things like that you know what I that example is such a good example like I didn't even think about that but that is so true because that has one million percent happened to me before where I'm like would I look better in this or do you like this and I'm like thinking to myself like I know this is the better option but you're saying it's not on purpose and they are just the worst type of people like you just don't need that like you want to surround yourself with people who are going to make you feel your best and like know that they have your

best interests at heart yeah exactly yeah I just I don't know yeah I struggle to understand I mean not even just female friendships I mean I'm probably going off on a tandem here but like before this I had my accent lesson right and I was talking about LA so my accent coach she's from America and she was saying like do you like America and blah blah and I was like I do but I was saying the only thing about LA that I don't enjoy is everyone goes there for the same reason and that's because they want to make it and that's amazing but the way that I see it is like there's room for everyone at the top there is like there's room for all of us to be at the top but the problem is with a lot of people out in LA again it's stereotypical but is they will do anything to like walk on over to make themselves at the top if that makes sense

whereas I don't realize we could actually all help each other get there and grow together and I think it goes back to that female friendship thing it's like you can both look amazing and like you don't need to bring the other person down I just don't like people that bring other people down to feel better about themselves whether or not that be female friendships or not I just can't understand it yeah in any situation if someone's going to try and make you feel worse to make themselves feel better so you said it screams insecurity from them because they can probably see that you're super happy and super confident and they want that for themselves and I agree with what you said about LA as well like that is so true I feel like that was also kind of could be deemed like the industry we're in

some people like to try and like I don't know bring others down to get to the top themselves but there is room for everyone did you see the TikTok about LA no which one there was a TikTok that went absolutely viral and she was slagging off la like all the reasons she hates la but it went absolutely viral because it's so controversial like everyone was like giving their two pence about if if they liked la or not and she was honestly saying for all the reasons that i hated la but now i like la i've been there enough times that i think i've found really good people but when I first went to LA I thought it was the most shallow place like it's just so many things about it like I

think I told you this I went to a party and the first thing someone said to me was how many followers have you got like literally at the front door and I remember thinking this place is not for me like this is so shallow I was speaking to someone the other day um at an event I went out and he was talking to me he went to LA he told me the exact same story he said i walked into a party i was in the kitchen someone said to me how many followers do you have yeah and it's all based on that they're everyone's not everyone because again it's very stereotypical it isn't everyone because i've met such an amazing friendship group but i think it just is a bit harder to find like I love LA now but yeah I do think it's harder to find yeah a lot of it is very almost clicky and unless they see gain in you

they're not necessarily interested but again that's very stereotypical because like you said you've made amazing friends I've got some really good friends out there as well who I've met now but obviously yeah just at the start you're like a small fish in a big pond trying to navigate it all out and it's just a insane world to kind of like enter into um but on more of a positive note then what's like one amazing thing or like one good thing that you can remember that your friends have done for you oh my god um well first of all just being there when I needed them the most yeah like absolutely like I can relate to that very much now as well like if I rank any of my friends I mean my friends have been checking up on me like every hour I'm genuinely not joking like my friends have been absolutely incredible to me um I think that's like for me the biggest thing is just friends that you know that are going to be there for you when you need them.

And when you're hurting. Yeah, I think that's the most that's the most amazing thing I think my friends have ever done for me. I'm sure they've done loads of incredible kind things for me, but I think that's the biggest thing. Yeah, I agree. I would literally say the exact same thing. I do have one thing that sticks out in my mind that my friends did for me once that I was just like I don't know so I basically I came out of like a situationship and it was like it really fucked me up like I think you know how badly I was just like what the actual like I was heartbroken I think it was the first time I'd actually experienced some

sort of like heartbreak in my adult life and it felt very different to like being heartbroken when I was younger and it was the last time that like I'd seen him and obviously I'd messaged my friends and being like right that's it like I'm never going to see him again now blah blah and I think they could all tell that I was in an absolute dire situation and they all said to me they were like right basically oh god this is so embarrassing but we just swapped an item back with each other like we just swapped all of our stuff back and I had something that um we both had we both swapped and I didn't want it anymore because it just reminded me of him so my friends are like bring

this item and we're gonna go for a drink so like we're thinking this is so weird why am I bringing this item so we're all sat down outside of this pub we're just having a drink and stuff which is really nice like trying to take my mind off it like not talking about it and then they walked me to this bridge and they were like you're gonna chuck this in the bridge into the water off over the bridge and you're gonna scream that you're done with him that you hate him blah blah and we're all gonna do it together and i have a video of me holding this item and we've all just absolutely screamed at the top of our lungs in the middle of Manchester by our mind.

So many people are looking up thinking, what is this girl doing? She's lost plot. And I've just lobbed it into the water. And I literally felt amazing. Everyone was like, do you feel better? And I was like, yeah. And then obviously, so we didn't litter. Byron stood at the bottom blessing because he was filming.

He went and picked it up out of the water and put it in the bin. That is so funny. That sounds fun sounds like i want to do that but also i don't really want to litter on my stuff it's no it's but obviously yeah we put it in the bin after but it was just like a release of like of anger and just everything and i was like oh my god i feel amazing and i never would have thought doing that myself in the bin now i think it would just i'd be like ah well yeah i know well myself. If I saw someone go through it in the bin though, I think it would just, I'd be like, ah. Well, yeah,

well, at least it wasn't me chucking it in the bin, but oh my God, I'm going to have to send you this video because I look like I've lost the plot. I'm on this like really high bridge chucking these into the water, but it was so just, do you know what I mean? Like just release.

And like the fact that my friends have thought like, yeah, we'll go and we'll make her do this. She's going to feel those there. We'll take her out, take her mind off of it yeah that's that is like a night like i don't know a good idea if you're going through something so yeah yeah i thought that's really lovely so that's like one thing that like came to my mind what do you think the secret to long-lasting female friendships is i think the secret is god it just sounds so cliche but i think just being there for someone like i think supporting

them in their decisions but or but also being very honest with them i think honesty is like a really big thing in friendship and i think there's so like i always see loads of tiktoks about it but you can like let like your friends or your best friend be like, let them make their own decisions, and let them do their silly things, let them learn, let them do whatever they want to do, but also being able to be honest with them when you think it's actually like,

right, I need to say something now. Yeah, I've actually got a good example of this. So I like to think I'm a very honest person, but we're all really great at giving advice and not very good at taking it like that is the reality of it right and I think it's hard when you're in a situation because you when you're in it yourself you don't see it from an outside point of view like it probably takes a month to actually realize what that person's like like or maybe you do but you're choosing to ignore it. Yeah, because you love them or whatever else. So you'd, yeah, no, exactly. And actually, I can give you an example with even with you.

So after I went through something recently, I had two types of friends. And both these types of friends have been absolutely incredible to me and so supportive. Basically, Anna didn't judge me in any way for any decision I was gonna make but still gave her honest opinion like she knew that I was completely getting screwed over in every way possible but at the same time didn't judge me for any decision I made like whether or not I wanted to stay and like that or whether or not I

wanted to leave there was no judgment but there was honesty it was like I really think you're getting messed over and this and this and this and all of those sort of things long story short but at the same time she wasn't like I can't believe you're not I can't believe you're not walking away I can't believe you're not there was no like made me feel a certain way if that makes it I wasn't scared to tell Anna anything because I knew she wasn't going to judge me for my decisions whereas I had another friend who is incredible and so supportive and all of her opinions was because she loves me so much and she was seeing that I was just getting screwed over and hurt over and over and over again but there was that constant I then got to a point where I felt like I couldn't tell her

anymore because I was going to get judged for staying you know and it's that sort of thing at the end of the day you're the person and that person is going to make their decision no matter how their friends react and I don't think you can make a decision based on what your friends are how how your friends are making you feel I don't think that's like fair like as much as it would pain me and anger me to see you get hurt and go through it again or anything like that but I'm like she's got to make her own decision and I've got to support whatever decision she's going to make because that is what she wants to do. That person's going to make it yeah you're going to make it so you may as well be there for them yeah so what is the point in me getting angry at you when i could just support your decision and then when you need me

if you need me and if it goes wrong whatever then i'm there for you like obviously and i think it's that balance of that like supporting someone's decision but also telling them how you feel and being honest and just giving an honest because sometimes it is hard to see it is hard to see your friend's point of view when you're in it you know like my friend was getting so screwed over like I can't even tell you and the amount I was like the amount of times I told her you're like how like how are you letting him do this to you again and again and again and again but then when you're in it it's totally different you don't see that and it's so hard to see that so you do need your friends and I think female friends are amazing at seeing that and telling you that and at the same time being supportive yeah one million percent I mean don't get me wrong if it was like 15 years down the line and I thought babe you're still

getting screwed over then at that point I'm probably getting a little bit angry I'm like what are you doing like then at that point we're going to switch up a little bit but like I think yeah the the key part of female friendships is just honesty and just supporting your friends decisions whether they are the right decision the wrong decision a silly decision at the end of the day those decisions are going to be made anyway so you might as well just support them go along with the ride and then be there for them when they need you. And I think that, I agree with you, I think that is why female friendships are so incredible

and what makes them so important. Let's go. It's a new day. How can you make the most of it with your membership rewards points? Earn points on everyday purchases. Use them for that long-awaited vacation. You can earn points almost anywhere, and they never expire. Treat your friends or spoil your family.

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From innovation to action, Sunnybrook is special. Learn more at sunnybrook.ca slash special. Female friendships versus male friendships. Like why, what do we think the difference is? As in like if I had a male friend or just male friendships? Yes. Do you have like a really close like male friend no see i don't so if i wanted a boy's opinion i'm not asking a guy the only people i'm asking is my brothers and it's funny because that's good

though because your brothers are incredible at giving advice and this is it right it's like my brothers genuinely in fact something about my family is their fair like that is one thing I would say like they are the most fair people ever like if my brothers hurt their girlfriends my mum would dis I think that she would disown my brothers like I'm not joking like she doesn't care that they're her sons she doesn't think they're an angel just because they're her sons she knows that nobody's like that so she would honestly disown them like she would yeah I know she would yeah so I think like with my family they're very fair and like even with my older brother like everyone's had a past right like no one no one

is perfect in life and so I think like my older brother especially because he's a lot older than me he has a lot more years like he also was you know a teenage boy with lots of boyfriends like he's seen it all and so his advice is genuinely amazing it's funny actually Jed's my younger brother is like more um protected of me than my old brother funny enough which is weird because you think it would be the other way around yeah I don't know what it is like if someone screws me over Jed's not seeing on both sides whereas Casey would like really try it I don't know that's just because he's so mature and he's a lot older he's seen it all sort of thing um but yeah I feel like if I ever needed somebody to talk to I'd speak to my brothers I don't have a guy friend but even like my dad to be honest like they're just very very

fair people they're never just gonna agree with me because I'm his daughter or because I'm their sister they won't ever that's exactly what you need like you need honestly and like you don't want someone being like yeah you're right you're so right all the time because actually sometimes you might not be and like you need to be told like both sides of a situation I mean that's so not especially like yeah your brothers are incredible at like seeing both sides like I think it's insane yeah and to be honest if my friends like had a like a problem with they wanted like a guy's point of view I'd literally be like go and ask my brother yeah he'll tell you you literally said that to me the other day you were like if you

ever need anything I was like just ask Casey really though like and Casey's just the most like he's so supportive isn't he like you even Anna was like I can't believe how amazing your brother's like your brother is like checking in on you every day like he's just so kind and so caring and also just yeah like I said just fair to be fair so but yeah that's that's all I've ever known all I've ever had is my brothers I'm super lucky I don't but yeah I haven't ever had boy friendships to ask but I feel like they are them so yeah I felt like yeah because I've got so like obviously my French group up in Manchester is like predominantly guys but I've also got my best friend Dev who I who I went to school with um and he is brutally honest if I was to need to ask him something

regarding any situation to be honest he would just tell me completely straight which is sometimes very terrifying but also like you like you said you need that um and the same with if i was to ask byron something or if i was to have even something like we were talking about like outfits if i was to walk out in an outfit that ain't looking cute i'll believe you know i'm getting told you know i'm getting told that to get that outfit straight off like there is just no way and I really and I appreciate that because I need that would Byron tell you that oh one million percent he tell you that and dress you for Coachella no and you know what we were speaking about that literally last night we spoke about that because last time we've seen like that because and I always wind him up about it but you know what the thing is and i do agree i

think if somebody else wore that outfit emma chamberlain wore that outfit it's cool you'll be fine yeah it's because it was me basically we went to coachella last year as you would have seen as you definitely would have seen probably it was all over tiktok um and my outfit was not the most coachella i suppose you know it was it wasn't the most Coachella, I suppose. You know, it wasn't the most Coachella thing you've ever seen. We just had, we wore, we had bikini tops, we had shorts on, and I had boxer shorts underneath my shorts. And Byron was like, that looks really cool. And at the time, I also agreed.

I thought, actually, I quite like it. And then I honestly, I kid you not, right? So obviously we're in a different time zone in America. So I wake up the next morning and I had a message from someone, like one of my friends. And she was like, she was like, hi babe. I really hope you're okay from all the hate that you've been getting.

Just sending my love. So I go to everyone. I went, Christ, I think something's happened. I was like, I don't know what's going on. But like everyone's checking in on me. And then I go on TikTok and it was the first thing that popped up on my view page and I was like Safa went oh no I went oh no I was like this is so embarrassing I can't believe this is happening and I just thought

to myself like this is crazy all over a pair of boxer shorts and my immediate thing was to turn to Byron I went it's your fucking fault no you did I went this is your fault for dressing me in this outfit i was like why have you done this to me blah blah and he was like anna like it's a cool effort like if emma chamberlain wore it if somebody else wore it like hayley bieber she wore it fucking everyone's wearing boxers one and not for another i mean genuinely if we were half the things these a-list celebrities wore on the carpet we'd literally get dragged like yeah literally because i look at a lot of like amazing really cool fashion and i love it like a lot of stuff on like jaded london right their fashion is it's a very like unique sort of style and i love it but if i posted instagram picture in that you know i'm getting dragged so i feel like that i've got

to a point where i genuinely don't i feel like with fashion wear what you want to wear yeah you just have to because at the time it did suck because to be honest why do people genuinely care so much what people wear to coachella we didn't care that year yeah no we didn't we were there to have fun to have fun yeah and i was comfy i had fun we had so much fun at coachella like honestly i look back at that weekend i think that was one of the best weekends of my life who gives a fuck if i was in a white bikini top and some shorts yeah like it is just so bizarre and boxes and boxes i can't forget the boxes but god now do i feel the pressure this year i'm thinking oh my god no boxes no boxes inside no yeah it is funny

is that but do you know what i feel like coachella the outfits are getting i feel like people are caring less and less me too i don't we're getting older i don't know but i feel like genuinely people are caring less yeah i don't think it's as big of a thing but then people still do the whole like rating code like youtube is coachella outfits or rating coachella outfits i wouldn't do that but i might book to go to coachella but what'm going to have two weeks to find an outfit. But my outfits haven't even arrived. I'm telling the world now, I've not tried, just to let you all know. So if you want to rip my Coachella outfit apart, I'm going for a good time and a good time only.

Exactly. I mean, my outfits haven't even arrived. Yeah, I haven't tried them on. I've ordered some, haven't tried them on. Even with my hair and makeup, I'm not trying to do the most. At the end of the day, it's 35 degree heat. Then suddenly an an hour later in the evening it's about two degrees and you're freezing like you literally you get so drunk so drunk honestly i could tell if i could go on i wish we had time to talk about the parties i wish we just had an episode called coachella there's this one party right that, that like it's genuinely incredible. It goes on till 5am in the morning and it's like a whole another festival and

it's super hard to get an invite and Anna and I got invited and Anna was too drunk that she didn't go. No, I did come, I just left. Oh my god, you did come! I did come, I just left. Oh my god, you did come! You came in all alone and now you left. But yeah, I did leave. I i was so drunk we'd been at

a festival all day so brennan may probably started drinking at like 12 one and the drinks in america are just ridiculous like the the amount of like if you're watching this podcast the vodka ratio to the mixer ratio is like insane to the point the drinks are even enjoyable i was drinking it like gagging every time but i was just so drunk like the heat and everything it just and the boxer shorts it's just not a good mix no to be fair the heat and stuff i feel like it just does make you so much more drunk so much more and the drinks at coachella you've never ever known anything so expensive in your whole life we were doing rounds was it for a drink oh my god i mean our round for four people was like 140 dollars it's just nuts and that was for like four double vodka with a mixer yeah yeah it's got i reckon even more than 140 it was disgusting

amount yeah it put to be honest it probably was more like i just was apt i think it worked out about 40 for a double which here in the uk what you're paying like 12 pound for a double yeah just are absolutely crazy it was so going off on one i don't even know why i was talking about the coachella oh because i was saying about byron picking my outfit and then yeah i don't know how we got onto that but back to that that is the only time that byron has maybe given me a questionable decision but i know like even when he did it like he genuinely thought it was cool. And I also did at the time as well.

That's the thing he actually did. Like he, Byron is someone, you know, like is honest. He was the best for you. He's a good person. Like he,

yeah. He wasn't that friend that said it to make you look bad. He was not that friend. No, 1 million percent not. But like, yeah, I think that is the difference between like,

I don't know. That is what I find with like male friendships. Like my friends are very honest, but I think. is the difference between like, I don't know, that is what I find with like male friendships. Like my friends are very honest, but I think- Well, to be fair, I feel like girl and a guy friendship is totally different because a guy isn't going to want his girlfriend to look bad. Whereas girls do it because to, so they're not looked at as like the more unattractive friend.

You know, like that's why girls do it like a guy they wouldn't have any need to do that you know one million percent and also like as I've got older I found out that like I just prefer the quality of a friendship over the quantity like I when I was at school my girl group was like 11 people and I love them all so much but like you just you just drift in different directions like that is just what happens when you 11 people and I love them all so much but like you just you just drift in different directions like that is just what happens when you leave school and I'm actually only like Tanisha's my only like best friend left from that group um and I just like as you get older like yeah my my circle has definitely got smaller but I just appreciate like the really

good friends that I've got around and I'd rather have like five amazing friends than 50 friends that like I didn't I don't know if I could speak to you about that yeah I think it's so much better and like well that's why I think as we get older most of our friendship circles get smaller yeah they do I mean I was super lucky because I always had such a big friendship but there's always been I've always said seven of us girls I've always said that there's actually six I was gonna say six I don't know why I've always said that. There's actually six of us girls. I was going to say there's always six. I don't know why I've always said seven, but there's been six of us girls that have been friends literally since forever.

Like so blessed, so lucky, so grateful. But other than that, to be honest, although I have lots of friends, because of the industry we're in, I think we make a lot of friends. I'm somebody that's always kept my circle very, very small. And it's not because I don't want to make more friends but I don't I do think it's really hard to find loyal people

I just never really felt a need to like make more I don't know make more friends like I just like my friendship group I know they're good people and like I'll make more friends but I don't know I just think as you get older you just realize having a small circle is the best thing a hundred percent and like in my adult years I've definitely made amazing friends like I really really have but like yeah I think you just kind of know I don't know you just you you know the group that you feel comfortable with and I feel like me and you've got to that stage in our life now where like I've got all my best friends and like I'm happy with that I'm really happy with that there's a quote here as well by the way I don't know if you've ever heard it before it's from sex in the

city and it says maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates and guys are just people to have fun with do you agree with that quote um yeah you know what I do because my guys are my girls yeah so do you know what I mean like and which is it's slightly different in that circumstance but yeah like all my friends are i actually do believe all my friends are like friendship soulmates i do i definitely definitely do like it is just crazy like how much you can click with somebody to like a point you didn't even know that you could click with them that much no that's actually so true and it's not like a romantic sort of love but it's just a love of like oh my god i love you so much like in a friendship way it's just like the best thing in the world no it's so true

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to find their passions and realize their potential. An IB World School, UCC offers a supportive environment, cutting-edge facilities, and a best-in-Canada financial assistance program. UCC, a place where tradition, excellence, and innovation meet. Learn more at our open house events on October 15th and 16th. Register now at causeandeffect.ucc.on.ca So do you think that friendship is more important than romantic love or do you think they serve different purposes in life? I feel like they serve different purposes like I feel like like friendship love has been incredible for me

like as I've grown up into like my adult years I feel like you you're always gonna have your friends I can I know I can always trust my friends I'm all they're always gonna be there I feel like romantic love is just something that like it's a different feeling is it yeah it is a completely different feeling like I do think like in a relationship the first thing you have to have as a foundation is the friendship and I always hear people say that like you have to have like a really good friendship and then you build a relationship from that and obviously like the sex life comes in because that is like predominantly the big difference between friendships and relationships you get very intimate with each other um but I think it's

just a completely different type of love. Yeah, I definitely do. Well, it's like, if a friend screwed you over, it's not that hard, I think, to cut a friendship out of your life. But if you're in love with someone, I think it's harder to cut someone out of your life. I think they serve, it's just a completely different feeling.

Although you love both of them so much in different ways, I do think like a romantic love, I just do think is a different kind of love. But overall, we love female friendships. We love girls' girls. We love supporting one another. One million percent. Uplifting each other.

I know I'm very, very, very grateful for all of my female friendships. Me too. I don't think that's anything i could ever replace with anything else no me too like it is such an incredible thing and like i'm well both of us are very very very blessed to have such incredible women yeah definitely because i know there's a lot of girls that don't have that as well yeah and yeah we are super super lucky but also to say as well, like you can meet, like I know some people that have literally met their best friend at the age of 30. Like it doesn't mean that because you didn't have,

like I'm so lucky that I met my best friends when I was so young. That isn't actually very common. Most people meet their best friends when they're older in life because you have more in common with them. Like it's actually kind of crazy that me and my friendships me and my best friends we all do such different things so it's actually kind of crazy how we all still have enough in common that we're able to be best friends because I think that shows that the love you have for each other is so strong that no matter what path in life you are going to take you're always going to find you

because you love each other that much you're always gonna work your way back to each other yeah that's true but also I think that's why a lot of people lose friendships and like they find new ones when they're older so I think even if you think well I haven't got a really strong girl friendship group like it's never too late to find those sort of friendships and you'll find them in things that you enjoy like going to certain things like if it's yoga like go to yoga classes you'll find other girls that like doing yoga and you'll find them in things that you enjoy, like going to certain things. Like if it's yoga, like go to yoga classes, you'll find other girls that like doing yoga and you can find your best friends that way. So yeah,

it is like, you know, in the adult years, it can sometimes be harder to find friendships, but like, just as a really good example, you guys might like on my birthday. This is my 21st birthday.

Jazz met one of her now best friends in the toilet of menagerie at my birthday just bumped into her they got speaking and they are now the bestest of friends this girl comes to everything that we do and she's so lovely and they met each other in the toilet yeah like just i don't know how just got talking so like you literally meet some of the bestest people in the most random situations at any stage in your life you don't have to have met two years old you can meet a 30 like you said yeah which is amazing but there you go that's more of a positive lovely positive note to end on so thank you all so much for listening i really hope you guys have enjoyed and we will see you on thursday for another bonus episode

see you guys bye