Sex, Love, and What Else Matters - Lena Reitz: Part 1

Episode Date: July 5, 2024

Episode 118. This week, Kristen is joined by one of her besties as well as her first roommate in Los Angeles Lena Reitz. Lena is internationally renowned as one of the most skilled and well-rounded extension stylists in the industry. She is also the Creator of the Universal Hair Extension Technique “Skinny Weft” and her work has been seen on key actors in Hollywood’s top TV shows and movies. Lena talks about what it was like having Kristen move in with her in 2007, and why she eventually voted to kick Kristen out. Kristen opens up about getting caught up in the “Hollywood” scene when she first moved to Los Angeles and the night that lead to her breaking point. Lena shares her story of how she got to where she is in her professional career – from moving to LA from Texas with $300 to her name, relocating to Canada for love, and starting her own businesses. She talks about having imposter syndrome as an entrepreneur and how visualization got her to where she is today – the law of attraction is real! Tune in now to hear part 1 of her story. Check out Lena's hair Salon: Hair Boss Sponsors: Use code DOUTE at checkout for 15% off your entire order at www.vionicshoes.com when you log into your account. Head to FACTORMEALS.com/balancing50 and use code balancing50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month. Follow us: @kristendoute @luke__broderick Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Meeting with friends before the show? We can book your reservation. Good news. We've got access to pre-sale tickets so you don't miss it. Meeting with friends before the show? We can book your reservation. And when you get to the main event, skip to the good bit using the card member entrance. Let's go seize the night. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Visit amex.ca slash y amex benefits vary by card other conditions apply Hey, I'm dating coach Talia Karen host of dating intentionally where I help listeners date with confidence and learn to enjoy the process Whether you're new to the dating scene or you've been at it for a while Tune in every Tuesday and Friday for my no-nonsense advice on using dating apps and navigating new relationships without letting your anxiety take over. You can find dating intentionally

wherever you get your podcasts. I always tell my... Fade into you. See, I wanna be a pop star. That's how I tell the road. She goes back away from the mic. I'm like, I wanna be a pop star. Fade into you, strange you never knew.

All right, fuck this shit, let's go. What's up, babes? Welcome back to another episode of Balance. I'm your host, Lina, and welcome back to another episode of Balance. I'm your host, Lina, and welcome back to another episode of Balance. I'm your host, Lina, and welcome back to another episode What's up babes? Welcome back to another episode of Balancing Act.

Ooh la la. This is Girl Talk. It's girl time. Luky Buky. I don't know why I call him that. Luke is in Colorado, again for the 15th time that you guys have to hear this. But yeah, it's girl time. So I have one of my closest friends, one of my absolute first friends in Los Angeles,

here with me in my apartment at my dining room table, which is what I use for podcasting. And you guys all know her. You know her, you love her, because she's been on Banner Pump Rules the last couple of seasons. I'll know her. You know her, you'll love her because she's been on Vanderpump Rules the last couple of seasons. And Lena Ritz, welcome to the podcast.

Hi, Kristen. Thanks for having me. Oh my gosh, I'm so excited. So Lena, you guys that are Vanderpump people, Valley people, like Bravo Watchers, Lena owns Hair Boss Salon in Hollywood. And that is where Tom Schwartz had his infamous dying of the hair that was like Circa Gwen Stefani.

His midlife crisis as he refers to it as. I did also refer to it that way, only because he did the blonde hair. And then there was another episode where he in Sandoval rented like an old Mustang, and then Schwartz went like an old Mustang. And then Schwartz went and got a tattoo. And I was like, this screams midlife crisis.

I mean, him and I actually talked about that, like how hair color can change your sort of lifestyle and the things you gravitate towards and do. You can feel like a completely different person. So absolutely. But here's the thing. I think what was so crazy about the Vanderpump change of hair, it's because Joe did it. Because for the viewers of Bravo,

if you go back in the 12-plus years that Tom and Katie were together, Katie always did Tom's hair. She always colored his hair. Katie's colored my hair before, where I'm like, girl, not with you, Lena, but with like a different hair stylist, someone who shall not be named. I got like these highlights that were a bit yellow. And so I'm like, Katie, I got, I have like professional color, but like, will you do it for me?

Katie's very great with hair and makeup, as we all know. So Katie's colored Tom's hair like fire engine reddish, like Auburn back to brown. She's given him highlights. So it wasn't so much that Tom decided to have a little change. like Fire Engine reddish, like Auburn back to brown. She's given him highlights. So it wasn't so much that Tom decided to have a little change. It was like, he let someone who wasn't like his wife or like very serious partner go from like zero to 100.

Well, at least she's a hairstylist. That is true. And I'm also really glad you fixed it. Blondes are a process, okay? You fixed it. Rome was not built in one day, nor was the Great Wall of China. And going from boxed-eye brown hair to platinum blonde also doesn't always happen in one session.

So collectively... Which is also true. I know that. I actually was an assistant at a hair salon before I moved LA I didn't know that you didn't I didn't oh my god girl They used to let me apply color and shit, too But I wash everyone's hair one time I shout out to my cousin Chelsea I love you one time she came in after hours, and I was like I totally know how to foil you want your bangs? Dye blonde guess where her bangs went in foil. They disappeared because I burnt them off.

Hair looks a lot easier than it actually is. Oh, 1 million percent. When I go into Lena's salon, I'm jumping all over you guys, back to my ADHD, but when I go into Lena's salon, I go, you know better than I do. I also believe that hair is absolutely an art form that you not only study to be brilliant at

as far as like the chemistry of it all, but it's also the creative, the art of it all. So who the, I'll show you a photo of what I think would look cool on me and what I'm aiming for, but that doesn't mean that's gonna work on me. Definitely. Well, I mean, I'm the type of hairstylist

that will keep it real with my clients. Totally. So the blonde did work on Tom, I'm not gonna lie. I love it. Once you fixed it and made it, like you toned it and you brightened it so it wasn't so yellow and it was platinum blonde, it went from highlighter yellow to a really cool blonde.

And I hope I'm allowed to say this and I don't get in trouble. But the reason Tom had to really go back brown was because of the show. I loved blonde on him. It's not like I swooped in and fixed it collectively off camera. Off camera, Joe and I worked together to lift them up and, you know, get some of the breakthroughs, some of the orange that was there. And then, Lena fixed it. What?

Keep going. Sorry. What? No, but there was a lot of commentary and feedback on the internet just about speculation of what his hair should look like. And I think California blonde and that sort of bleachy, untoned blonde, that 90s look is sort of like, was the aim. Oh, it's...

Yeah. And it's also very in right now and trendy. It is. And so that can be misinterpreted as, hey, you didn't tone it, you know? And that just wasn't. Okay, what, okay, listen, what I will say, I'm gonna continue to say you fixed it, sorry, not sorry.

But what I will say is that you did make a kind of a statement on Instagram that I don't think was seen by a lot of people that when I'm gonna, here's me breaking the fourth wall, y'all, you guys know I feel like at this point, if you're avid watchers of Vanderpump since the beginning, you know, like they're not following us around 24 seven. You have two hours, probably at your salon that you own

to do Tom's hair, to lift it. That's not happening in two hours. So what the audience got to see was two hours of the process. But I'm still gonna say that you fixed it. So there's that. And it looked fucking awesome. I thought Tom looked hot as shit with blonde hair.

But I also think Tom's so, he's just Tom. And it's like, he's so like, I wear Adidas pants with like socks and sandals, and I don't give a shit what I look like. He's like a hot Adam Sandler. It's tough to have him have a big change because he'd have to upkeep it. So I like that he ended up going back to brunette, but I do like that he took a chance and he got to live his best life

being a blonde for a hot sec, you know? Definitely. And I wish he could have wrote it out a little longer because you do go as a blonde, you like you go through all these different stages of the blonde. And we different things out in the I don't know how long he stayed blonde for a few different weeks. And we did do the ashy blonde and you know just played around with it but I think the roots would have looked good if it could have just grown out a little bit with some dark root in there that kind of grungy edge look. Hey Vanderpump is on hiatus. Yang can back into Hair Boss. Yang, if he ever wants to come back and go blonde, this is a safe space. He can come visit us.

It's a safe space. It's a safe space. Just putting that out there. It is a safe space. I love being there. I was there twice last week. I got my tracks put in. I got some new, fresh extensions that were longer because we're not going to talk about hair the entire podcast, guys, but this is important to me

because it's a part of my like personal, like I don't know, I don't wanna say self-worth, but like when I look at myself in the mirror, it's why I did the air sculpt. Like I'm not getting crazy town, but I'm like, I don't know, I want my hair to look the way I'd like it to look when I look in the mirror.

And I like a little bit of Botox, cause I'm 41 and it makes me feel prettier. And I like putting, like being out in the sunshine because it's good for my mental health, but also I get a little bit of bronze. Like there are things that make me feel good about myself, regardless of what the internet thinks. And for me, hair has always been a thing.

Well, when I first met you, you had long, gorgeous hair. It was this length. It was like right below my boobies. I feel like I remember it being longer. Maybe a little bit longer. Yeah, and you just moved out to LA. You had a modeling agency. 2007, y'all.

You were pursuing modeling and acting. And then your agency told you to chop it off, like real short. Yeah, it was, if I remember, it was 13 inches, maybe 14 inches. And then that was just your look forever. Yeah. Short, chopped hair. Yep.

So I love your hair long. Me too. I just feel like sexier personally. It has nothing to do with how people feel about me because I do get a lot of comments like, oh man, remember when she had that short bob, that was so cute. Oh no, I like it better when it's super long.

Everyone has an opinion. For me right now in this stage of my life, I feel sexy as fuck with long hair. So that's where I'm at. Okay, I just had to get over the Vanderpump rule stuff and like get into it because people, I know we're gonna be like, are you guys gonna talk about it or not?

So let's talk about life, Lena. You guys, Lena's not just my hairstylist. Literally, I said it very quickly, but one of my first roommates in LA. Well, my first roommate in LA living with you, our friend Sarah, and Liz, fresh off the boat from Michigan, I was futon crashing in their three bedrooms. So thank you for that.

Oh yeah. Oh yeah, what a treat. What a treat. You guys, I was a bat out of hell. I came to California like this guitar playing, bonfire loving, long hair, like hippie, dippy chick. And I got sucked into the Hollywood of it all. I only knew Lena, our friends Sarah and Liz,

and Rachel O'Brien, the only people that I knew. I moved here July 10th, 2007, started working at Sir mid-August of 2007. And yeah, I got roped in real hard. Yeah, that was wild. I have known you for a long time. And in the beginning, there was like a little bit. Yeah, that was wild. I have known you for a long time. And in the beginning, there was like a little bit of friction, I would say.

I don't even know if you remember that because I don't know if I was internalizing it or what, but expressing it. But I mean, I voted to kick Kristen out. And this is, you know, before we chose to live together again. This is back in the beginning. Oh yeah, so just so you guys know, we're gonna get to it,

but Lena and I were roommates again, many years later, just the two of us. Yeah, so there was some redemption there, but in the beginning, I think it was that being fresh to LA. Yeah, I wanted bottle service only. I only waited, I didn't wait in line. I was a VIP only. And I'll tell you guys, I'll be really honest

about the straw that broke the camel's back. I went out one night with some people that I barely knew who were very, I don't even know, just very Hollywood, I guess is the only way I can explain it. I did a bunch of drugs. I was at some freaking house in Bel Air. I had, I don't even know if it was a flip phone

or if it was like that Palm Trio type phone. It was something like that. And I had accidentally left it there. And I came home to our little abode in Toluca Lake, realizing I had no phone. I have no idea how to get ahold of anyone. I don't even know how to get to this house. I don't know what to do. Like things were not as convenient and accessible

as they are now. And I was 24 years old and a fish out of water and wasn't being true to myself, I think is the best way to put it. So cut to just like hell on earth and getting my phone back. And yeah, my roommates had a bone to pick with me as well as Rachel O'Brien did. And they were like, we don't even fucking know you,

figure it out, move out. I mean, we were just so different. We were so kumbaya around the house, like going to bed early and waking up early and doing yoga and, you know, it's like- And playing guitar and stuff, like before I got to Hollywood. Yeah, so that was a different Kristen

to the Kristen that I knew after that. But I think you figured it out pretty fast. I did, and I think I'm very grateful to have figured out that LA, I just say Hollywood because it's the best way to explain it. The LA Hollywood bullshit, I feel very grateful, not that I was doing drugs, but that I was safe after having that shitty night

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Vionicshoes, wearable, well-being for your feet. LA can chew you up and spit you out. And people come here. How long have you been here? 23 years. Holy shit. Yeah. I moved here when I was 17 years old.

Oh my god, Lena. I don't even think I realized you were that young. I shit. Yeah. I moved here when I was 17 years old. Oh my god, Lena. What? I don't even think I realized you were that young. I was super young. I had $300 to my name that I borrowed from my grandpa. Okay. You came to LA 17 years old. 17 years old from Corpus Christi, Texas.

I had $300 to my name. I packed two suitcases mostly of clothes like that I thought I'd look cool in, move into LA. And I got on a Greyhound bus and it dropped me off pretty much in Hollywood Boulevard. And that's where I stepped off of the bus from small town Texas to Hollywood Boulevard. I didn't really have a plan either. Did you know, did you have friends here

you were gonna move in with someone? Or what was your thought process moving to LA? I started dating a guy in a band. And so hot. That was like a dream back then too. And you were 17, of course. Of course I was 17 and I wanted to be a rock star. I was like, I'm going to go out to LA and make music and get in a band and tour

and do that whole thing. I think a lot of people come in pursuit of something. And that was my thing. So like I quit high school and I had been working at IHOP and Corpus Christi, saved up a little bit of money and like got out here and was just knew that I was just going to figure it out. Where you go, there you are, you just figure it out. So I got a job at IHOP in LA at first and then 9-11, and I got fired from my job. Oh, wow. Yeah, because 9-11 disrupted the economy.

Of course. You know, it was a very scary time, and it's that they either fired me for that, that was like kind of what they said, but they also didn't like that I had purple hair. I dyed my hair purple. So yeah, either way, I got- Did you have full sleeves at that point?

I did not. I didn't have any tattoos. I can't even imagine you. So yeah, either way, I got- Did you have full sleeves at that point? I did not. I didn't have any tattoos. I was 17 years old. I wasn't even old enough to get tattoos. Oh, that's fair. I was bare skinned. I cannot imagine you without tattoos. Like, it's vile.

I couldn't imagine me without tattoos either. Yeah. It's beautiful. That's so crazy. OK. Yeah. And so I got fired. And that's actually what led to starting my hair career was I had already been doing hair

in Texas, but not licensed and not professionally. I was just really good at it. And you were so young. I was so young, but it was like a huge passion of mine. I was really good at it. So I actually made some money doing hair when I first got to LA. I would hang out in strip clubs and do the stripper's hair

and charge them hundreds of dollars, you know? And so- Fucking hustler. I know, I was already doing braid extensions and extensions and stuff. And so I put together a portfolio and I took it to a salon on Melrose and they gave me a job. Just a disclaimer that you don't have to be

a licensed hairstylist to do extensions, which is kind of scary. But I was really well trained and then I ended up getting my hair license. But yeah, at the time I was just winging it. But you know, I'm this 17 year old kid. I have no money. 17, I can't get past that.

Yeah, I was like trying to work to afford my overhead living in Hollywood and no car. So I'd walk to work. And my mentality was a little bit rebellious of like, I don't need to pay money and go to school. Like I can learn this the old fashioned way, apprenticing from other people that were really great. Well, and I guess back then it was very different

because I'm not gonna lie, I won't say which salons I worked at, but I was an assistant where like I did put color on hair back when I was like 17, 18 years old. Yeah, so I worked that way for a long time because it wasn't a credential that you had to have. I got really obsessed with doing hair, loved it so much. It led to me eventually trademarking my own extension technique.

Because when I first started out, there really wasn't a lot of extensions on the market, safe extensions. So that's what led me to. Shout out to Skinny West for trademarked. That is just such a feat in its own, because, you know, Lina, and I'm sure you guys listeners all know how much I fucking love Shark Tank. I just love hearing about your journey and I'm so excited for our listeners to keep hearing like as we go through today's podcast, hearing about your journey coming from where you are to then trademarking to owning your own salon to being sorry, I'm kind of doing this

in the middle, which might be a little weird, but like you're a wife, you're a dog mom, you're an entrepreneur, you're a small business owner woman, internationally at one point, might I add, which is fucking insane. So I just wanted to toss that out there. I basically pulled you guys all in because you were like, oh, Lena owns this lawn that was all in Vanderbump rules. But on Balancing Act, I just really

want to drive it home to all of you guys, the struggles, but how fucking exciting it can be when you work really hard. So I just wanted to toss that in there. Yeah, definitely hard work. And it's been a journey. And a lot of it's hindsight, looking back at the years, because as stuff is naturally unraveling and happening to you, you don't really see how far you've come or the progress, but really looking back on the journey,

because you're just present moment with it, like every step of the way, you know, and it's, you know, to become successful means that you have to be prepared for a lot of sacrifices, not only sacrifices, a lot of like ups and downs and the struggle is real. So oftentimes at first when people were congratulating me for opening, you know, my first salon, you know, I couldn't feel the pride and the joy of the other people were bestowing. I could not. I was so boggled down with just like stress and... You open your first, let's talk about this. So we're gonna skip past some of my and Lena's like stuff,

which we'll go back to you, because you guys are gonna die knowing that I lived with Lena again in Los Angeles. I later found out we were literally around the block from where Ariana lived. And this is when I hated her by the way. So we're gonna get back to that, so stay tuned. But let's jump to when you opened your first salon,

it was in Canada, not even in the United States. Talk about starting over in your 30s. Yeah. You know, like I actually didn't even know what I was gonna do for like real life until my 30s. So if there's anyone out there that's like feeling like they're in their mid 20 or getting to their thirties like what am I doing with my life?

I feel like everything in life will lead you to that moment and it's all shaping you and preparing you for what's next and expanding your vessel to grow, to hold the capacity for what's gonna come into your life. And I didn't know that at the time. So it was just very scary. I felt like I didn't know that at the time, so it was just very scary. I felt like I didn't know what I was gonna be, what was gonna stick, what was gonna be my career.

You loved music, you loved doing hair, you knew you were creative, you knew you were a hard worker. It's not like you went to school, you're like, I'm gonna be a lawyer, and I'm going to law school, and I'm gonna be a lawyer. Yeah, I didn't have the financial stability and security for a long time in my life, and I guess I intentionally kept be a lawyer, ah. Yeah, I didn't have the financial stability and security for a long time in my life. And I guess I intentionally kept it that way

because like that musician part of me wanted to be that free-spirited gypsy, like up and go whenever I wanted. You know, and I knew I was a creative, but I had no idea I had a business bone in my body because I didn't come from a family of business owners or friends surrounding me, right? So I had no idea of this untapped potential that I discovered.

Can I ask you about that? Because you and I have talked about this on the side a bit, but as me personally, you guys, like, yes, I'm on a television show, right? But that's not my forever plan. It also doesn't last forever. I am a creative. I have this t-shirt line, clothing line, whatever you want to call it.

I have this podcast. I love creating. I want to do a cookbook with my best friend, Janine. I am a shitty fucking business person. And I'm going to be real honest. It's because business bores the shit out of me. It bores me so hard. I don't care.

And I want to care. I want to be invested in that because it is so important. And I know that I need to grasp the business side of it in order to be a successful entrepreneur. Not that you can't hire people to help you with that or hire people to tag along or take over. But if I'm owning my own business, I want to give a fuck. I want to be interested in it. So as a creative yourself, did you ever feel that way? Or were you always kind of interested or like, how

did that look for you? Yes. So it can be overwhelming to think about like all the moving parts going on and all the hats that you have to wear, especially when you're starting something out and you don't have the money or the budget or the team to help you. So you're basically running everything. And I tell everybody, just start somewhere to like try to wash away some of the overwhelm. Just start somewhere small and start with that one thing. And you kind of figure it out as you go along.

And knowledge is power. And because I didn't have the traditional schooling background of business, I had to figure it out for myself. And you just do like you just do you just figure it out one step at a time, one foot in front of the other. And then eventually, you start to learn everything that you need to know to like get something going, the friction and the momentum starts to happen. But as far as business, I mean, we're living in a time where we have so much free resources, we have the internet, right? So I googled a lot of the things that I didn't know. I watched free classes. Yeah, because we didn't, we didn't have that, you know, 15 plus years ago. No, we first moved to LA, like we didn't have that 15 plus years ago.

No. When we first moved to LA. I mean, we did have the internet. But I'm talking, we were like, I was printing out MapQuest to drive. We didn't have social media at all, except for MySpace, HTML. There wasn't social media to connect businesses, unless it was like, I don't know if LinkedIn was a thing then, but LinkedIn wasn't for creatives.

It was just more difficult. It was a lot harder to figure that part out. Yeah. But you're right. Right now, the resources are like in abundance. Oh, yeah. They're throwing themselves at you. Yeah. And then it's like, well, where do I begin with all of that? And one big part of this was before I actually owned a salon, where I gained the confidence and where I discovered that I was good at business, good at managing, and that subjective good at managing.

It's something you learn. Maybe I wasn't great at it at the beginning, but I actually got a job managing Bellamy, which was a cool opportunity. Do you remember that? That's right. Yes. Right across the street from Sir. Yes. I came in. Oh my God. I forgot all that? That's right. Yes. Right across the street from Sir. Yes. So we were-

I came in. Oh my God. I forgot all about that. I know. It was a moment in time, but they were looking for a manager. They, Bellamy, in case you don't know, it's the biggest distributor of hair in the world. At one point in time, they didn't have any brick and mortars.

It was all just online clip-ins. And so they were looking for somebody to hire to manage their very first flagship location in West Hollywood. And they interviewed a bunch of people and I got that position. And what I didn't know when taking that position was that it wasn't, the position wasn't defined. And there wasn't like somebody teaching me everything to expand on this business and to be a manager. It was like, I realized when I got that job that I was that person to create the concept of the salon, to literally like map out the blueprint of what this location was going

to look like. So it was such a gift for me to be able to kind of practice. These are the stepping stones before you own your own thing. You get to do it with the backing of a major business that has the finances and the team to support your ideas. I love that you just said it was such a gift, because my brain was like, holy fuck, the pressure. So you were like, no, it was a gift. I was expecting you to just be like,

the pressure of trying to create that, you saw it as a gift. And I think that speaks such volumes about you as an entrepreneur. And realizing it, because like I said, I didn't even know that I possessed it, but it excited me. You know, I got really excited about it.

And I think there was an awareness to know what you didn't even know. And so it's like that awareness right there that I could step into this role and conform this concept of a beauty bar, of a business. That was really cool. So I did that for a while. I mean, I did everything from hiring my team,

you know, the headhunting and handp picking people to training them, creating the training modules, the services, naming them, pricing them, just like literally built the business from scratch. Built it from ground up. From ground up. I mean, I'm not trying to take all the credit, but you know. That was your position. That was my position. And then I was so exciting because I got to work with product development and designing

the hair, like the volume weft. Some of the key products that this company was known for because it was something completely different and unique that was on the market, those were my creations. It was the ingredients for success is literally what it was. And they got to... I had the support of them bringing this, listening to my ideas, listening to like why we need this in the industry, because it wasn't already being done, but I was so hungry for like these concepts to like be born in the extension industry

that I just like sold them on it and skinny weft, I brought my method there. And like, you know, that's where it first got it, the world got to see it and experience it and we did it on hundreds of people. And then eventually they expanded to other locations and major cities. And then the method expanded, the education expanded. And then I moved, I gave it all up at this point. Like this was my dream job. I was like at the height of my career at that point.

And I thought that was the top. And that went. So what changed for you? Yeah, so I moved for love. I moved to Canada. the height of my career at that point. And I thought that was the top. And that went- So what changed for you? Yeah, so I moved for love. I moved to Canada. As we do. As we do.

But we'll say that wasn't a failure because you're married to him now. Yeah, and it's 10 years later now. God bless. God bless. It wasn't for nothing. No, it wasn't. But yeah, I saw that as the height of my career

and I loved it. I loved my job. I loved working for that company. And I moved to Calgary, Alberta, Canada. Yeehaw. Yeehaw. You know, and that was, wow, that felt like a major step backwards, to be honest. Right.

So yeah, because I was going to ask, So we obviously said you opened your first salon there. When you first decided, like, I'm moving to Canada, Nick is Lena's husband. So you were like, I love Nick, I'm moving to Canada with him. Was your thought process, I think I'm going to open my own salon? I actually got a job to manage an extension salon

in Calgary, Alberta. And I naively moved there thinking that this would be a quick process where I could just get this. It was called an LMIA, labor market impact assessment. And what that meant was why would I qualify over a Canadian that they could give that job to? So you have to prove your position. And I had some... Like, why are you more worthy or? Yes.

Yeah. I've been hearing that a lot from friends with spouses trying to have a visa in LA. It's like, what makes your particular job worth you living in LA, I'm sorry, in the United States? Yes. Which it's so, it's just such an interesting thing that I'm learning and that I'm very grateful to know about so yeah Okay, so this is what you're going through Why are we gonna give this position to an international rather than our own people our own citizens?

So that was for me. I had a notable position I had been you know I had some clout about me as a as a manager and extension technician And I had some clout about me as a manager and extension technician coming from the position that I was leaving in Los Angeles. And so I worked for that company and it was a lot of struggle at the time because I had to wait. I migrated to Canada and I thought that I would be getting this visa within just a few months but it actually took over a year.

And I only had so much money I brought with me, and that was dwindling. Because so just if you guys aren't aware, without a visa, a working visa, you cannot make money. You cannot have income. You cannot be employed and have income. And it's kind of a trap because not only can you not work, but you're actually not supposed to travel or leave. So they were not letting me leave from Canada to go back to the states where I could work

and get money and come back. I did that anyways. I would travel back down to the states, work a little bit, get money, and then come back to Calgary while I was waiting for this visa. And then it was so devastating because once I finally got this particular visa, it meant that I could only work for this company.

And within a few months, I felt like really knocked down by that company. It was not a positive environment for me. And I'm not one to quit easily, but it is like I had to. So I just kind of knew that this, but it is like I had to. So I just kind of knew that this wasn't the place and position for me. You know, I was really excited for the opportunity,

but I just knew in my core, this wasn't for me. Now that was devastating because I had just waited over a year and I exhausted all my money. And then I worked for this company for, I don't know, maybe four months before, four to six months, let's call it that. And then I was just like, I don't think I can do this anymore,

but what am I gonna do? You know, I was at this crossroads, I was broke and I was desperate and I had just like left my job and moved to a new country and I had no money. And I'm in my mid thirties and mind you, I don't have any more, I don't have a visa to work. So that's called status.

I have no status anymore in Canada at this point. I had no friends. I had no existing clients. I had no family there. All I had was the person I knew at the time, was my boyfriend at the time that I moved there for. And so when you asked me a little while ago, did I know I was gonna move to Canada and open a salon?

Hell no. So what in the hell and how in the hell for everyone who wants to be their own boss? What made you go, I'm going to open my own business. You know what? None of this is working out. I'm going to hustle harder than I've ever hustled before. And I'm going to open my own business in a country

that I'm not yet a citizen of. Yeah. Well, so that's the thing with life. It kind of leads you to these crossroads where you take the evidence of what you've experienced and then you have a whole different viewpoint. So I didn't go into anything and it was never my childhood dream to think that I was gonna open a salon or want that.

I wanted to be a rock star. You know what I mean? Like that is all I ever wanted. Um, and I love that, but it, but it was like, kind of like, what am I going to do? And here's the thing that I realized is that we all have imposter syndrome. And when I got hired at like, you know, Bellamy and I was put in that position to be the, you know, an expert behind the brand and to be a part of building that brand up, I realized my potential and I realized I was, you know, business minded.

I never knew I was. Sometimes it's somebody giving you a chance and they basically gave me a chance to do that. So I discovered, I started discovering all this potential and then I worked this other position where they were like kicking me down and making me feel like I was the opposite. So it was like contrasting, you know?

They were just really beating me down. Like I'm nothing, I'm worthless. Oh, we thought you were this, you know, something else and you're not. It was devastating to feel that way. As a female who's very confident in their work of their stature, of their education, to feel beat down, like that's tough.

It was spirit crushing. It was spirit crushing. I feel that in my soul. But also it was important too, because it did give me a perspective of, okay, you know what, if I own my own business, I hope to never make anyone feel this way. It creates this awareness.

And at that point, I also realized that I have high standards and that I am an expert in what I do with extensions and that I am like, worlds above a lot of people because I started this journey 23 years ago with extensions. And this is all that I ever did. And it's because at the time I didn't have my license to do cutting and coloring.

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to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month while your subscription is active. So I reached a point where I no longer had a visa, and I just had this idea that if I start my own salon... Wait, you no longer had a visa, like, whatsoever? I had no visa, and I also had no money. And at the time, like, I did not know what I was going to do, so I had to just figure something out.

And so I started reading about the different types of visa that you could get, and there was one called a significant benefit. And this to me was like my only hope, I thought, because I could like open a salon, and then I could pursue getting a significant benefit visa. And then I thought that was that would be the ticket to being able to live in Canada and to work there. Now to get this significant benefit visa, you have to have the location, you have to have a lease, and you have to have hired staff. How the fuck can you do that if you're not a citizen? Exactly. So, it was like running into all of these roadblocks.

It's like, okay, I literally had to go find a location. But guys, this is all the secret to the law of attraction. They say, if you want that car, go test drive it. And so that's what I did. I like went and looked at locations. You know what I'm saying? You're making me cry right now. As soon as you said law of attraction,

I was like, oh my God, I get it. It's all how this unfolded. It is magic and it really works and it's worked for me. And I tell people, this is real, real stuff because I am that little punk rock girl from Corpus Christi, Texas that got on a Greyhound bus, two, 300 bucks to my name with two suitcases at 17 years old. And present moment, I own several businesses that have been successful. And this is just like the start.

Right. So, so, so law of attraction. So, so I had to, you know, I had to go find a location and then I had to talk to landlords and I'm like, can I rent this and can you give me like a temporary lease just so I can show immigration that I have found a location. You guys, the location was a basement. It was a basement. I had all this adversity at the time working against me,

but I promised you can take adversity and make it advantage. And that's what I did. And so I got that location and then I started to seek out hairstylists. Would you be my staff? I'm gonna open this salon. This is my idea. And so I started to seek out hairstylists, would you be my staff? I'm going to open this salon. This is my idea. And so I started getting staff members.

And what was the other thing? So I had to like, you had to do all this stuff. And then I was like, okay, this is it. Now in order to get the interview for this application, you have to leave the country and come back and you have to meet with an immigration lawyer that's like there at the airport upon arriving. To get the specific visa that allows you to be a business owner. Yes. So I put forth all this work and I get to this officer and I present him my, I

was working with a lawyer that was helping me this stack of papers of all of this work I put, and I put it in front of him, and I said, here you go. And I've always been very lucky in my life. So I just like thought this would be a walk in the park and all the hard work was done. He looks at me, this officer, he looks at me and he laughs at me. And he said, is this a joke?

And I was like, what do you mean? And he's like, you're applying for a significant benefit visa. Do you even know what that means? And mind you, they are not nice. I'm under-exaggerating how mean this guy was. And he crushed me. In five seconds, the tears were in my eyes.

And he's like, a significant benefit visa means that you're bringing millions of dollars into this economy, that you're giving jobs to dozens of Canadians, that you're bringing millions of dollars into this economy, that you're giving jobs to dozens of Canadians, that you're actually impacting the economy. Like you want to open a hair salon. Like, do you know how many hair salons we have in Calgary already? There's one on every corner. And then what did you do though?

Oh man, I fought for this. I stood there with the tears in my eyes. I was genuinely gutted. This was the first moment in time because I don't see doubt in my mind. When I'm on a mission, I just go for it, tunnel vision. So this was like a roadblock that I did not anticipate. And I'm pretty charming. So I thought, oh, I'll charm this man.

But yeah, he was telling me no and what a joke I was, and this is ridiculous, and I'm wasting his time, and no means no, and I just stood there. I think that I spent about 45 minutes to an hour rebuttaling. Every time he would tell me a no, thank God, I was a telemarketer when I was like 15 years old because I learned how to rebuttal. Isn't that genius?

Like you're looking at me like- Oh my God. I know, right? The things you learn in life. And this man did not know where I was coming from, but I swear the passion inside of me, something in his heart changed. And he said, okay, you know what? Like he even told me, he's like,

I feel like this is an episode of Shark Tank and you've actually just convinced me. So I'm gonna approve this significant benefit, but you've got three months to prove to me that you're gonna get this business up and running and going and getting off the ground. Otherwise, we're going to just take it away from you and you're going to have invested all of this for nothing. And when he told me what a significant benefit visa is, I said, I will be that.

And I will come back and I will find you and I will show you. I will show you a million dollars. I will show you a fucking million dollars. Watch me. I will show you that I am a significant benefit to the economy of Calgary, Alberta, Canada. And one year later, I did make a million dollars. My business brought in a million dollars. And I didn't even like, I wasn't even, oh my God. It was like, it just happened. I remember looking, you know,

I lost track of time and numbers. And I remember seeing the first 100,000 that came in and I was like, oh my God, I was staring at like those zeros. Oh, yeah. A hundred thousand dollars felt so much to me because I've never had money my whole life and I don't come from money and my family doesn't come from money. I remember James May, I launched it in June 2018. In 2019, it aired on Vanderpump Rules. And when I saw it hit over the 100, over the 200, over the 300,000, I was like, I don't deserve this. What is happening right now? I've worked really hard. Granted, I started James May in 2014

and that shit was ugly as fuck. But like, yeah, just seeing those and being like, oh my God, like I didn't give up. I didn't give up. And then I lost James May, not lost it, but like put it on hiatus and then just came back with it and just found a new partner, started working really hard and just being like,

well, Lena, I told you this right before we started recording. I said, whenever I meet people just out in public and they say either A, I love your podcast, I love James May, or I read your book, I break down in tears because those are mine. And I imagine that's exactly how you feel. So sorry to like jump in on that.

I just know that feeling of being like, I've worked so hard and it's been like a no after a no after a no, or I'm spending all this money that I don't really have, but I just believe in it. And I'm so, I just, I feel it in my bones. And that's what you did. Hang on to that and don't let that go. And I ask that to people sometimes I say,

beyond a shadow of a doubt, do you feel in your core? Can you feel and see this all working out and being successful? And I just knew it. There was not a doubt in my being that didn't know I was not gonna succeed at this. And I just knew it with There was not a doubt in my being that didn't know I was not gonna succeed at this. And I just knew it with every cell in my body. And also I'm very stubborn.

And so I wanted to prove it to this guy. Yeah. Because I knew what I was gonna be. I knew the impact I was gonna have on this city with bringing my methodology there and this concept that I had. I knew it would be successful and I knew that I would work hard for it

and that nothing was gonna stop me. So to put this in perspective, I had no money, guys, no money. I was living at this point off of going into deficit, like my credit cards, and I took out a loan. It was a $25,000 loan from the bank and I was naive. I thought I could build this business off of that because that seemed like a lot of money to me at the time. I had no status at the time

until I got this temporary visa that I had to prove. No friends, no family, all of that, right? So I wasn't at an advantage at this point. I was like in the deficit. And I think that this is important. And when I tell my story, I like to tell this to people because people have dreams and you're starting off in different spaces in your life.

And I think we're so used to people like having hand downs or coming from money or having the finances or just a little bit of support. Some kind of help. And I had the misconception that you needed that in order to, cause I couldn't dream this big cause I just never thought it would be a possibility. So I didn't even know I could dare to dream this big to ever

own my own salon. And what I tell everybody now is the key to how this worked for me is you have to envision it. You have to hold on to like, you know you can achieve this, but you have to work within your means. However small that is, start within your means. Do what I did. Go look at the space, go find a space and visualize it and see yourself there.

You don't know. And I found a space that I could afford. It was a basement suite. You know, I wasn't know. And I found a space that I could afford. It was a basement suite. You know, I wasn't a storefront. I was low level. So there was no walk by traffic. That was another thing that like, how could I be this successful with a basement suite, you know, and there was there was no nothing in there, no lighting, no plumbing. So it's actually kind of this is sort of magical. But when I hired the plumbing company to come and give me a quote and even let me know if this space that I found

was possible to have plumbing, that became my very first business partner. So talk about that law of attraction. Stop. He said, what do you plan to do with the space? And I said, I wanna make a salon out of it. And he said, well, I own a plumbing company, but I actually used to be a hairstylist.

And it was such a dream of mine, but I wasn't good at doing hair. But I would love to invest in your business. I know. Right. I can't believe I didn't know that. That is pure magic. It's magic. It's absolutely magic. Absolutely. And I just love everything you just said is like probably my favorite words you've ever said, even though you're just so poetic all the time as my friend, but truly being like,

just because you don't have like the best thing or it's not pretty or it's not this, it doesn't fucking matter. It doesn't fucking matter. We're doing my podcast in my apartment. I do have access to a studio. I don't always have access to a studio. I don't always have access to a studio. I didn't have access to a place to store my James May after I had to move out of my house.

So I stored it in my spare bedroom until I had enough money to be able to afford to put it somewhere else. And during COVID, I was printing everything out all by my fucking self with my partner at the time, but it wasn't fucking easy. But it was like, I don't care, I'm not giving up. I was fortunate enough to start my businesses post Vanderpump rolls.

I made money, I was very lucky, but then I stopped making money. I was canceled. I had nothing for three years. And I was like, what am I gonna do? I guess I have to give up on everything. I'm gonna go back home to Michigan. Nobody wants to hear from me.

No one wants to give a fuck about me anymore. And then I got over my pity party. I let myself be sad. Then I got over my own fucking pity party. And I was like, you know what? Suck a dick, Kristen, suck a dick. Get it together. Like you had it then, you still have it now.

Go bust your ass. Let people tell you now. And work harder because of it. And that's what I love about like you and your whole story and how you continue to do what you do because you just bust ass and you make shit happen because you have it in you to do that. You guys, thank you so much for listening.

I love that this is going to be... This is like a two-part episode because, again, literally one of my first friends in LA, my hairstylist, Mabu, and a woman entrepreneur, small business owner who is killing the fucking game. I'm so impressed by you. I love you more than ever. And thank you so much for coming on Balancing Act

and telling us how the fuck you balance life like it's fucking killer. My last question for you, what's your favorite topping on a pizza? This is not a hard question. If I had to choose one, it is hard. No, you can choose a shit ton. Oh, oh, I can have more than one.

Girl, get it. Okay, we're definitely doing mushrooms. Are we definitely doing mushrooms? We're definitely doing some olives, some onions and some banana peppers. Oh, I'm into it. Yeah. Okay, yeah. Yeah, we could share that pizza.

Fuck yeah, we can. With a gluten-free crust and vegan cheese. That's my jam. I just made a cauliflower pizza, frozen cauliflower pizza last night, thinking I was gonna fucking hate it. It was the tits. Oh yeah, I love the cauliflower crust.

It was so fucking good. Anyway, love yourself, love everyone else. Don't be a cunt, you know what I mean? I'm just kidding, I love you guys. Bye. Make sure to follow us on social media. You can follow me on all platforms at Kristen Doty and follow Luke on Instagram at Luke double

underscore Broderick. Be sure to click the subscribe button so you can stay up to date with new episodes. Thanks for listening. See you next week. I'm looking for a mom friend that wants to talk about motherhood, parenting, mental health, marriage, friendships friendships and more. Unfiltered of course. A mom friend that wants to feel less alone in all of her seasons of life.

If this is you, let's be friends. Come on over and listen to Mama Knows wherever you get your podcasts.