Sex With Emily - How to Make Missionary Kinky

Episode Date: October 13, 2023

Missionary is a tried-and-true classic. It’s the position many of us think about when we think about sex… which is also why it gets a bad rap. Haters say it’s boring and vanilla, I say it’s an underrated favorite. In today’s Best Of episode, I’m helping you upgrade your missionary game from “meh” to “mind-blowing.” We'll debunk myths about missionary and dive into ways to spice it up, from subtle tweaks to full-blown transformations that’ll keep you (and your partner) coming! Struggling to reach the big O? I've got position hacks to enhance clitoral pleasure, especially for vulva owners who might not feel the stimulation they crave in typical missionary. Speaking of “typical” missionary… Who says missionary can't be kinky? I reveal some of the hottest ways to incorporate bondage, dirty talk, and even some BDSM elements to transform missionary into your new go-to position.See the full show notes at sexwithemily.com.Show Notes:How to Master Pretzel PositionElevated Masturbation: Try a StrokerVIIA Hemp Co’s High Love Libido Gummies (code EMILY for 15% sitewide + Free Gummies Sample)Magic Wand Mini MassagerWe-Vibe ChorusArticle: Missionary Sex Position – New and ImprovedPodcast: High Pleasure: Cannabis + SexSHOP WITH EMILY! (free shipping on orders over $69)The only sex book you’ll ever need: Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your PleasureWant more? Sex With Emily: HomeLet’s get social: Instagram | Twitter | Facebook | TikTok Let’s text: Sign Up HereWant me to slide into your inbox? Sign Up Here for sex tips on the regular. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I get that the fully grown for so many of you is that like, oh, I want just penis to go in my vagina and then I have a screaming orgasm like I see porn or like I've seen the movies and I'm just going to remind you that's not realistic. That's not how we're like goats. That's not how it works for most people. You're not seeing the warm up. You're not seeing the oral sex. You're not seeing the foreplay.

You're not seeing the lube. You're not seeing all the things that went before that. You're listening to Sex with Emily. I'm Dr. Emily, and I'm here to help you prioritize your pleasure and liberate the conversation around sex. In today's best of episode, we're talking about probably the most classic sex position, and that is missionary. Now, some of you might think it's basic or even boring, but I'm here to tell you that missionary

can be incredibly hot, intimate, passionate, and even kinky. In addition to dispelling missionary myths, I'm also going to be answering your listener questions. Please rate and review sex with Emily wherever you listen to the show. My new articles, How to Master Petsal Position and Elevated Mastervation, Try a Stroker,

are up on sexwithamily.com. All right, everyone, enjoy this episode. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪ Introducing Uber Teen Accounts. In Uber account for your teen with enhanced safety features. Your teen can request a ride with top-rated drivers. And you can track every trip on the live map in the Uber app. Uber Tina counts.

Invite your team to join your Uber account today. Available in select locations. See you for details. All right, so tell me what comes to mind when you think about the missionary sex position. Now wait, what do you think about it? Maybe you think about, yeah, that's the go-to position, that's what we do all the time, or maybe you think, yeah, it's kind of boring, or maybe you picture that it's so intimate, and it creates a really close connection with you and your partner.

Maybe you think about your first time and it wasn't that great because survey says a lot of adults have moved on completely from missionary. By Dr. Evan Goldstein, he's also a guest on the show and he said only 21% of gain lesbian respondents and just under 27% of straight respondents said missionary is the position that turns them on the most, which means that for more than 73% of us, hmm, not such a turn on. For straight respondents, by the way, doggie style was the clear winner. Maybe it's because doggie style is primal and animalistic, but you know what? I'm going to tell you this, you can bring that energy to missionary too. That's what this shows about. So first, let's define missionary. Well, in this position, the penetrating partner is on top. And the receiving partner is on the back and they're facing each other.

That's basically what it is. So today, my goal is to get you try to think differently about missionary, starting with what's so great about it. Okay, so first, here's what I think is great. You get to make eye contact with your partner. Their skin to skin contact. I think it's sexy. You can take it really slow. Let the energy build. You can start making out.

And I just think it's a really connected position. So when you're thinking about, you know, I want to feel closer. I want more passionate sex or romantic. I think that missionary has all of that. Also where I love about missionary, it's a great position to add toys. Because there's so many places you can stimulate from this position and there's different kinds of toys. It could be a vibrator, it could be a penis ring, a butt plug. Don't forget about your anus because you're in missionary. And both owners can experience

double penetration. That's something that can happen. Here's the other thing. Clideral stimulation. Use your hands. You can reach out and use your hands on your clitoris. Your partner can do that. You can reach around and grab your partner's ass. Try some rougher like touching. You could even do some consensual domination. Bonded. You can tie someone's arms back, you can use a spreader bar, and you can spread their legs if they're on the bottom. I think a blindfold is great for most sexual scenarios,

because it heightens all your senses, so you're really feeling that connection even more. The other thing about missionary I like is that there's just more than one way to do it. You're not just lying there, looking at each other with your legs straight against each other. There's ways you can vary it. The bottom partner's legs can be pressed together instead of open. That has a few benefits. When you're pressing your legs together, you can stimulate your pelvic floor muscles. You can do

your keglexer sizes. Remember, those are the muscles that are responsible for orgasm, and you can also squeeze against your partner's penis, which feels good for everybody. You could also try the coil alignment technique or the cat position, which I will talk about a little bit, but that has excellent clitoral stimulation. Another option. One partner standing up at the edge of the bed and the receiving partner is lying on their back with their pelvis lined up at the same height. This is awesome for deep penetration. Or both of you are lying down. A vulva owner can bend their legs back, even to their ears. You know, if they're bendy, you do let's yoga, which can create exactly the right angle

to hit the g spot. One leg up, both legs up. I mean, there's so much to try. And also, that's actually great for smaller penis owners. I get a lot of questions from you guys about penis size and the best positions. When the vulva owners link back with one of both legs over the penetrating part of shoulders, this way you can maximize penetration. You can lean into their legs or use their ankles for support or leverage. And for larger penis owners, keeping the vova owners legs down lets them use their thighs to control the thrusting. So you could also start by positioning your pelvis

a couple inches lower than hers to avoid going too deep. So I'm going to get into more of this shortly, but I'm a fan of a lot of the positions. You know what? I think that we can make any position really hot. I love missionary, but I understand there's a lot of the positions. You know what? I think that we can make any position really hot. I love missionary, but I understand there's a lot of misconceptions, you know, that it's boring, or it's just a default sex position, or that static, you can't change it up, there's nothing kinky about it at all. There's also the misconceptions, heart of our vulva owners to orgasm, and if you've had this problem, I get it. You might be reluctant to give it another chance and it just might be your least favorite. But I've got some ideas that you probably haven't tried it. So I'm going to dispel your missionary misconceptions and see if we can look at it differently.

Let's start with the first one. The first misconception is that missionary is boring. And yes, for some couples, missionary can feel like it's just the default. So why do we make it more intentional instead? Because the stereotype that missionary is a passive position for a Volvo owner, just because you're on the bottom doesn't mean you can't take responsibility for bringing the erotic energy. In fact, I say everyone should be bringing the erotic energy all the time. And listen, I don't think you should blame it on the position because you can take anything and make it exciting. Any sex act, I think, is about being present. So, all the owners, I want you to prioritize your pleasure. I would say communication as a lubrication, tell your partner what you

want. In missionary, they've access to so many erotic zones. All of them, your ears, your neck, your armpits, and scalp are also erotic zones too. The time we figure out where all of our erotic zones are. And of course, your mouth, I feel like an old school makeup session to make it hot. It's not like making out during missionary. And here's a tip for penis owners are partners on top. While you're up there, don't forget the biggest sex organ of all is the brain. So tell your partner how much they turn you on. It's such a fun position to like talk dirty, whisper in each other's ears. And okay, do my Volvo owners be collaborative?

Now, try moving your hips in a slow circle, move and sink as your partner's thrusting so they can go deeper. You can use your hands, or your partner's hands stimulate your clitoris, you can use a toy, use a pillow under your pelvis to change up the angle. What I'm saying is this is all about exploring

and trying something new. If you've always just sort of lied there, a missionary thought, all right, this is my time just to lie back. Just think, well, what would it feel like if I put a pillow underneath me or wrap my legs around my partner's neck or I put, you know, one leg back and left one leg straight or I just sort of grabbed my partner in different ways or I stimulated myself. You know, these are all the things that like, I'm not saying if Duma wants, but just get curious. What else might feel good in this position?

Let me tell you about the cat technique. So this position is probably the best missionary position for literal stimulation. So how you do it is the vulva owners lying on their back. And when the penis owner enters what they do is they scoot up a few inches higher than usual, right? So they're kind of a little bit over your head. And the vulva owner's body should be flat up against theirs. So what I want you to think of is think pelvis to pelvis

rather than in and out. And the motion is an up and down rather than a side to side. So there's like a steady rocking up and down with a focus on where the clitoris hits the base of the penis. Get it? So why don't you take this slow because it's all about stimulating the clitoris, the pubic mound, which is also indirect stimulation to your g-spot. All these nerve endings are related. And so if you're going in and out, which is kind of our default for many of us, that's just not going to do the trick. So check out the Quoidal Alignment Technique.

If you go to our website, we'll also put this in the show notes. We have a link to the Quoidal Alignment Technique. If you go to our website, we'll also put this in the show notes. We have a link to the Quoidal Alignment Technique sex position. Let's get into your question here. This is from Anna in North Carolina. And Kat might work for her. Dear Dr. Emily, I'm a fairly sexual person, but my sex drive is lower than my boyfriends. I like experimenting and trying new positions,

but since we started dating, we've settled into a pretty standard sexual routine. Me on top, to missionary with me using my fingers on my clitoris. I'm aware that this routine you've settled into is largely because I don't initiate doing anything different. I love how connected we are to missionary because we can kiss and see each other's faces. It could also be hard for me to get off, especially if I'm not the one stimulating myself. And this position is where I can do that best. Plus, I've had partners in the past who've been very experimental with positions, and those experiences most often didn't result in orgasm on my hand. I think that all these factors caused me to choose a tried and true missionary position every time over any others.

My boyfriend has requested trying other positions a few times, and I usually do it with him, but I always end up steering back to missionary. The other night he asked if we could 69, and though I did want to try it, I actually haven't been able to get off of him going down to me. I even went as far as starting to go down to him, but I'd chickened out and rolled him on top of me to do missionary. How can I get past this mental block that keeps me from branching out and trying new positions? Alright, thank you so much for your email, Anna.

Well, first up is recognizing that you have a block against this, which is huge. And I also want to say that our sex life is not a fixed state. My mission is to get everybody to constantly be exploring and opening up and seeing like how we can expand our sexual repertoire. So just because you have an orgasm from oral yet or in these other positions with past partners or this partner doesn't mean it's not possible. And sign note, I want to remind everybody that the goal of sex and access to experimenting is not necessarily orgasm. It's about exploring. Okay?

Paying attention to what feels good and seeing where you could get stimulated, then maybe you get to orgasm. So I want to know how much time you spend getting to know your own body and what feels good to you, because I know that a lot to be learned during a masturbation practice, getting comfortable with yourself, and then showing what your partner likes is key. I think we got to share, bring our partners into our struggles. Because then you're not one person trying to solve your sex life and trying to fix it and try to pretend.

This is where performative sex starts to happen. We think that we should be doing something different than how we're feeling, acting like you like it. Although, you know, you're not doing that. You're shutting down the positions going back to missionary. But what I'm saying is, what if there's a middle ground here when you say to your partner, listen, I know I've sort of shut down positions lately, but I realize I haven't really tried that many positions

or I have an out of luck in many positions finding what makes me feel good. So another thing that could be good for you too is some mutual masturbation. So he could learn what your hotspots are and what feels good to you. You could learn what feels good to him. And then maybe there you guys could figure out,

well, what positions would feel good knowing now how you touch yourself and how you get really turned on. And I want you both to have the goal of pleasure and wanting to be good lovers to each other. So slowing down and communicating your needs is key. So again, expansive sex growing together over time and then bringing in some new positions to keep it interesting and hot and we'll keep it from getting less root and boring which to be honest happens with a lot of things in our life our exercise routine and

things we're eating our nightly routine and the way we have sex. All right, Anna, let me know how it goes. Keep me posted. Hold your positions because we'll be right back after a quick break for our sponsors but first I want to tell you one of my favorite ways to spice up any and all sex routines. And yes, that includes missionary. Picture this. You're feeling incredibly sensual. You're in the moment.

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but they just work. I love them. So spice up your love life, try it out. Viahem companies, high love THC libido gummies, just go to viahemp.com, use code Emily to get 15% off your order. They also throw in a free sample of their award-winning gummies. You gotta begin the% off your order, they also throw in a free sample of their award-winning

gummies. You gotta begin the United States to order, and that's viiay, hmp.com and use the code Emily and Checkout. Have fun! Be right back! Introducing Uber Teen Accounts In Uber account for your teen with enhanced safety features. Your teen can request a ride with top-rated drivers,

and you can follow their ride in the Uber app. Uber Teen Accounts. Invite your teen to join your Uber account today. Available in select locations. See after details. At Salesforce, we're all about asking more of AI. Questions like, where's the data going? Is it secure? Are you sure? Are you sure you're sure? Get answers you can trust from Salesforce at AskMoreofAI.com. that there's nothing kinky about missionary. And let's just be honest, the name doesn't do it any favors.

But again, it's all a matter of mindset. Listen, if you want the primal energy of doggy style, let's just find a way to bring that into missionary and combine the best of both worlds. All right, here is a question from Marka, 30 in Missouri. She writes, Dr. Emily, how do I tell my partner that I want to feel their desire? I want to hear things like, you know, you need me so bad and bend me right over the kitchen

table and rip my panties off or push me up against the wall and tell me you want to fuck me right now. I find the more serious our relationship gets, the less kinky my partner wants to be. We've been having missionary sex strictly at bedtime for a few months now, and I worry he'll be uncomfortable being as rough or outspoken as I want him to be with me. Sex is super important and I don't want to lose our excitement. Alright, Marka, thank you so much for your email. I get it.

You want him to bring a little bit more energy. You want him to be a little bit more dominant. Maybe you want him to have dirty. You want him to learn a new skill set here. So he's not doing anything wrong at all. It's truly about showing him what you want, what you need. I think that this is the challenge with this. He's super comfortable with you, you're comfortable with him, and then saying someone, be dominant. You know, when we just tell our partners, oh, throw me against the wall, throw me against the bat.

They want to please you. I would think it sounds like you guys are in a good relationship, and it's getting, you know, a lot more serious. But understanding when and how to do something like that is something that we got to learn. What I would say is that you have a conversation with them outside the bedroom about your sex life, you know, using my three T's, timing tone and turf. Turf is outside the bedroom and timing is when you guys are hanging out, maybe it's your

next date night and your tone is light and curious. And you want to say to them, I really want to talk about our sex life. So, with a compliment sandwich, want to talk about our sex life. Start with a compliment sandwich. You could talk about all the things that you really like about it, and you've enjoyed going to bed together and having sex,

and that you love how the relationship's getting more serious, and how you feel so much more closer to them. And then you could say, and I really want to keep the passion going in our sex life, and you can even say to them, I've never actually talked to someone about this, but it's really important to me to have a growth mindset around sex. And a growth mindset means that it's important for you to continue to have a sex life that is expanding and growing. And it's not

fixed, right? There's a fixed versus growth. Fix means that we're going to keep doing the same things over and over again. You could say, I've adopted a growth mindset around sex. And I want to make sure that we're on the same page of this. And again, it sounds to me like maybe this is new for you to have these conversations. I'm just going to assume that you're like most of our listeners and most people on the planet that we don't talk about this stuff. So again, bringing your partner in and saying, I want to be great lovers to each other. I want to keep this growing and passionate and hot.

And then you could say something that I think about is being dominated, and that would look like you kind of grabbing me and telling me what you want me and you know bending me over the kitchen counter, and those are the things I think about it would be really hot. Tell me how many of that lands with you. Now I'm telling you, you might be like, well, what do you mean? I'm not good enough in bed. I want you guys to understand that it's the first time you talk to your partner about sex.

And maybe it happens several times. You have to be prepared that your partner is going to feel like you are paying the attacking them, that they're doing something wrong, that they're not great lovers. I mean, all these things come up because again, most of us don't talk about it. So you have to do your best to reassure him and say, no, this is just something that I'm working on too. We're in this together. I also want to know what turned you on? What are your fantasies? And listen, you could even just start with, I realize you've been together for a while now, and we've never talked about our

fantasies. I want to hear your fantasies. Tell me your top three fantasies. Here's my top three fantasies. We don't have to get all this out in one conversation. So just starting more basis like it's important to me of a growth mindset. Let's talk about our fantasies. We don't have to get all this out in one conversation. So just starting more based like it's important to me have a growth mindset, let's talk about our fantasies. And then you would lead into, I'd love it if you dominated me. And so then he can kind of hear what you said. And again, you have to be feel comfortable like reassuring him and letting you know that this is something that you guys are in together. And he might not know what it means. We're going back to it's a skill set. Sure, he wants to please you. When you have like, I don't know what you mean.

I've never done that before. Is it okay to be physical with you in that way? So this is where we use our tools. This is where I love porn. This is where I love you finding some clips, some audio, some video that kind of let him know what you are into and what that looks like. You can even show him.

I might be out of you, dominated him for a minute. He knew what you liked. So that's the first thing is letting him know that's the energy that you want to bring to the table. And if you want to keep missionary hot, you could also have him dominate you during missionary. He could take your hands and he can time behind your head or just take your hands and push him back behind you.

So you can't grab him. He could also get a spreader bar, which is really cool that keeps your legs spread apart. your head or just take your hands and push them back behind you. So you can't grab him. He could also get a spreader bar, which is really cool. That keeps your legs spread apart while you know you're having missionary. So get creative. Maybe listen to this episode together and have some conversations, Mark, so you can get your needs met and make your sex life super hot because you deserve it. Let's get into your final misconception number three. A lot of all of our owners say they have a hard time getting off a missionary, but that doesn't mean it's not possible. Everything's possible. Really, it is.

See, literal simulation is super important, so the key is just figuring out how to work it in. And by the way, if you don't orgasm, nothing wrong with you. For some people, many people, missionaries go without the big orgasm, So I'm not suggesting you need to be fixed or anything's wrong with you, but if you're looking to hack missionary or change your experience, I am totally here for it. All right, this is from Cassandra 29 in Ontario. She says, is it true or false that if you can orgasm by stimulating your clitoris that you cannot orgasm through penetration. I also have heard and I've read that there's no such thing as a g-spot. I'm 29 years old and I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for seven years. I lost my virginity to my boyfriend and

I've slept with no other men other than my boyfriend. I'm not able to have an orgasm through penetration. I so badly want to have that sexual experience with my boyfriend but it only seems I can feel pleasurable by stimulating my clitoris. Help me! Because Sandra, you've come to the right place, I'm here to help. So let's just clear some things up right now. The majority of vulva owners can and will have an orgasm through their clitoris. That's how it happens. All right, it's clitoral stimulation and that is a type of orgasm that is the most common. The g-spot which I just I don't know how we say this doesn't exist and you know I feel like a g-spot, it's kind of I think it's more of a g-area, I think it's really internal, clitoral nerves, but there is an internal nerve that is called the G-spot that's an area and it

just takes a little bit more exploration. Now let me tell you this, that if you could have a clitor orgasm that is amazing because for the majority of all the owners to find their G-spot and to find that internal orgasm, it helps to already have a clitor orgasm, it helps to already have a clitoral orgasm. Because then you're more aroused, the tissues become more engorged, the blood starts to flow. So what I recommend is maybe your partner goes down and you first, you use toys, fingers, mouth, and you have that first clitoral orgasm. And then you could try penetrative sex. Now, when you put this penis inside you, you might be able to have an orgasm because you're already aroused. And then you could try penetrative sex. Now, when you put this penis inside you,

you might be able to have an orgasm because you're already aroused. And then you could start to relax and breathe. You can pump your pelvic floor muscles, you know, against this penis. That's how it might happen. Have you ever tried that? A lot of us just have our clitorar orgasm

and we're done or we assume that you should have an orgasm through penetration. But I'm gonna remind you here that only 30% of vulva owners will have an orgasm during penetration. And so it's very rare. 70% will not unless they have extra-clidol stimulation with hands, a toy's mouth. Okay? So, I want you to experiment and see during masturbation or mutual

masturbation, if you can find your G-spot, have a blended orgasm, which means that you're really just after you've a clitoral orgasm, then you have a G-spot orgasm. It can be blended. I think that they're often really related. Some of the vulva owners who do have an orgasm through penetration, it just has to do with the placement of their anatomy. It doesn't mean they were born under some special moon or anything. This is really just about figuring out your own body. We have a great squirting episode with Deborah Sundahl and we get into this a lot about

finding your G-Spot. So, I want you just to prioritize your pleasure and take some initiative in talking to your partner and letting you know that this is a goal that you have and you guys can work on it together. Again, it's so fun to bring your partner into these goals that you have sexually. Cat position might work for you too, the coil alignment technique that I talked about, but I just think the big thing here is your mindset. So I want you to flip it and know that it is possible for you to have orgasms in other ways. And I get that the holy grail for so many of you is that like, oh, I want just

penis to go in my vagina. And then I have a screaming orgasm like I see in porn or like I've seen in movies. And I'm just going to remind you here and if I can do it every day on the show which I probably do try to, that's just not realistic, that's how real life goes, that's how it works for most people, you're not seeing the warm up, you're not seeing the oral sex, you're not seeing the foreplay, you're not seeing the lube, you're not seeing all the things that went before that. And in fact, also just seeing a penis goes into a vagina and someone starts having a screaming orgasm, again, only works for 30% of all the owners, okay? So I want you to remember that. I want you to bring this into your relationship and

start to work at understanding your body and how you can have more pleasure during parted sex, alright? Thanks for your question Cassandra. I believe in you and you got this. Speaking of our G-spots, our nexus there has found her, yay, I love that, but she needs help incorporating her vibrator into missionary. Alright, this is from Tori48 in Canada. She writes, Hi Dr. Emily, I used to find it difficult to orgasm in my younger years. I basically needed a jackhammer to get off. I was thrilled to discover the magic wand, which was a game changer for me. I became brave enough to bring it up with my husband. I'm a people pleaser and concerned

about hurting others' feelings, and I guess ego's in this case. I finally got the courage to communicate that I need to incorporate a vibrator. The problem I need to solve today is that the magic wand is big and cumbersome in some of my favorite positions. For example, when I want to have

an intense close embrace during missionary position, I have to ease my guy up and back onto his knees to fit my vibe into the mix. The pleasure of the vibe near his balls and shaft during doggie, my absolute favorite position, sometimes gets them off too soon. Is there a vibrator as strong and intense as the magic wand that is smaller and less awkward? Yes, I finally taught myself to ejaculate, I found my G-spot years ago, but finally nailed how to bring her alive. Alright, thank you so much for your question, Tori.

Alright, few things to unpack here. I totally get love in the magic wand. If you guys do it with the magic wand, it's been around for over 50 years. It is the mech truck of all vibrators. It used to just plug into the wall and then about. I don't know how many years ago they came out with the rechargeable magic wand, so you don't have to be near an outlet. But now I've got some great news for you, Tori, that the magic wand just recently, I just got a few weeks ago, came out in a mini version. That's right. There is a mini wand with the same power

and half the size. I've solved your problem. I love this product. I was so excited when I got it, I screamed. I didn't know it was coming out. It was the whole thing. I've been busy. I wasn't paying attention.

And there it was in my mail and I love it. And I use it all the time. Now it is amazing, everyone. Check out the new Mini Magic Wand. Why is a Magic Wand so great? It really does have this power that is unparalleled, that was one of the first in business. It's made from body-save material.

It's really easy to use too. You know, there's some toys that have like, you know, 15 patterns and 20 levels and all the things, which is really fun. But this toy just got a few levels, a few patterns, and it feels unbelievable. And you're gonna love it. So, Tori, thank you for your question.

I appreciate you. The other thing I want to say is, I'm a people-pleaser too. Any other people-pleasers could totally relate to Tori's being concerned about hurting your partner's feelings. And I want to challenge you right now, if you are that person and you're thinking, oh, God, I can never do that. And I'm a people pleaser. Well, I want to

challenge you to be like, Tori and to practice asking for what you want. Just one thing. Because I know we often believe that we are hurting our partners, egos. And maybe they're going to leave us or they're going to feel rejected. But what I want to say is if you are not asking for what you want and you're not letting your partner know that you need something else, well, essentially what you're doing is you're choosing their satisfaction and their pleasure over your own. You're essentially saying, my pleasure doesn't matter as much as my partner's ego or protecting my partner. And do you think that your partner would actually want that for you?

Would they want you to not be having as much pleasure so they would feel better? And I hope they would not want that and they would fully support your pleasure. And the guy said, I am a people pleaser. I think it doesn't ever go away, but it's something that I work on and I definitely have to work on this in the bedroom myself.

And once you start to do it, you realize that it gets easier and becomes a conversation that you start to have with your partner and it becomes a conversation that you start to have with your partner and you enjoy it. And you start to expand on it. And you're like, well, this is what I used to like last month or last year, but let's try something new.

And it's a great way to have a really healthy, ongoing conversation with your partner about your sex life. Let me just say this, there are some other toys besides using the magic wand. We vibe make something called the chorus, and it's a wearable vibrator. They were the first ones to make wearable vibrators. So it's shaped like a C, and you could actually wear that during penetration, where the internal part kind of cups around your vulva. So there's a part that's inside that's stimulating your G spot, and there's another part that

goes over your clitoris, and then your partner's penis goes inside of you. So that's a fun one you can play with too. Alright there you go! That's it! That's our episode of Making Missionary Hot. I hope you learned a lot and try it out. Let me know how it goes. That's it for today's episode, see you on Tuesday. Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. Be sure to like, subscribe, and give us a review wherever you listen to the podcast and share this with a friend or partner.

You can find me on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter at Sex with Emily. Oh, I've been told I give really good email. So sign up at sexwithemily.com and while you're there, check out my free guides and articles for more ways to prioritize your pleasure. If you'd like to ask me about your sex life, dating, or relationships, call my hotline 559 Talk Sex. That's 559 825 5739. Go to sexwithemily.com slash askemily. Special thanks to Acast for powering the Sex With Emily podcast.

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