Sex With Emily - Sucking Smurf Spooge

Episode Date: October 3, 2011

Guest Cunning Minx (polyweekly.com) talks about polyamory, 'sucking smurf spooge', is polyamory that much different than dating?, why porn is good for your relationship, why geeks are into polyamory, ...gun and fire arm play in bed, how to overcome jealously, licking vs. touching and should you put his penis in a cage? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 I Look into his eyes Then the eyes of a man obsessed by sex Eyes that mark our sacred institutions Betruma eyes they call them in a bygone way hey, I mean you got a boyfriend because my man eat here You just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute. The girls got a hair stand It's so nice the women know about shrinkage. Is it a common lolly?
Starting point is 00:00:26 What do you mean like laundry? It's shrink? Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god. I'm all for some. I'm gone. Being bad feels pretty good.
Starting point is 00:00:34 You know Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex relationships and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwiththeemely.com where many of you are watching the show, listening, watching live every day, one a few PM, except Wednesdays. Thanks everyone for joining us. Happy Monday, very exciting.
Starting point is 00:00:54 Our show today, we have a great guest, Conning Mix. We're gonna be calling her at about 15 minutes and she is awesome. She hosts the Polly Emory Weekly podcast. Menace, you know, I love the topic of Polly Emory. Yes, you do. And some things she can talk about is,
Starting point is 00:01:10 there's a lot of things she can talk about. She wants to talk about sucking Smurf's Spooge. I'm not sure what that is, but also some Polly stuff. How to, how to, Chelsea 101, modern day Polly from Utopia to now. And just about regular relationships. You know, Polly from Utopia till now, and just about regular relationships,
Starting point is 00:01:27 you know, Polly, I'm a Polly, I'm a relationship. Oh yeah, sucking, spur spooge, I'm sure that's a normal thing. That is going to be normal thing. So we're going to call her soon, and then also you can call us anytime for one, five, nine, nine, two, seven, three, nine, two, you can also leave a message on our voice mail when we're not doing the show, and we will play your message on the air when we burn the city. And yeah it's Monday I had a long weekend my mom was here if you guys saw the free Friday show my mom was on the show which was great. I loved it. I know she gave really practical advice. I really enjoyed it
Starting point is 00:01:59 a lot so people should listen to it. Please listen to it. She gave really practical advice because you know the two things that break up relationships the most, like the reason why people get divorced are usually money or sex. And my mom's a financial planner, she's an expert. She speaks all around the country about couples and money and how to deal with it because it's like the one thing people don't talk about.
Starting point is 00:02:18 And it's so important. She got into that. And I thought that was really interesting. And we had fun. She just left yesterday. Oh, really? It was all weekend. All weekend. It's a that was really interesting. And we had fun. She just left yesterday. Oh, really? It was all weekend. All weekend.
Starting point is 00:02:27 It was a long time with mom, but it was good. Yeah. I totally freaking out. I had to fit in hanging out with some guys. I didn't fit hang out with any dudes. It was all mom all the time. We were shopping. We went for walk.
Starting point is 00:02:38 She bonded with my dog. It took a nap together. That's really cool. It was cool. How was your weekend? My weekend was, uh, said by a vent, full. I mean, I wasn't, I have been feeling 100%. So I thought I would stay home and rest a little bit.
Starting point is 00:02:54 Oh, that's mature. But my co-workers who are all females, because my house, my apartment, is down the street from our radio station. Right. And so it's like, I'm the closest one. Right. And it's in the middle of everything where they, you know,
Starting point is 00:03:09 to go party. Right. So they wanted to come over and like pre-drink before they went to the nightclub. And so they came over and they were just wild and crazy. And we took funny photos, the Instagram stuff. I ended up putting on the Tinky Winky outfit. Oh, of course.
Starting point is 00:03:24 And I was taking pictures with the ladies. So if you guys follow me on Instagram, you can see them. They're pretty hilarious. Follow me on Instagram. That is white menace. White menace. So I did that and then I stayed home and I watched bridesmaids again, which I need you to see. I really want to see my mom. We walked past the bridesmaid time. She goes, that was the stupidest movie I ever saw. Oh my god. Everyone tells me I have to to see my mom, we walked past a bridesmaid time, she goes, that was the stupidest movie I ever saw. I was like, oh my god, everyone tells me I have to go see it. No, no, you were totally, you were totally crazy. How can I see it? Can I watch it? Can I write it down?
Starting point is 00:03:50 It's a watch on a demand, since you have key words. Oh, you told me that on demand. Let me write it down that it's still there right now on demand. You want me to break it down how you see it? Yeah. All right, here you go. You click on demand. On demand, the on demand button button and then it says movies Just in and then scroll down and you find Brian's okay, and then he press it tonight for sure I'm telling you you would love it. Okay. I can't see I don't know I mean it's a lot it's really filthy younger humor, but not too young She said there was like shit humor a repeater like going to the bathroom, and she's I don't find that funny. Yeah, no, no, no, you don't actually see shit or anything like that. No, no, but it's it's really hilarious
Starting point is 00:04:31 It's it's definitely like really true to the times I think okay. Yeah, so I definitely recommend it to me. I'm going to I'm going to watch it tonight Because it's my TV week is starting So I'm watching television. I have to. I have no choice. You've been saying that. I know, but it's been a busy time. Are you up on anything about this? I've seen it all over Twitter. It's not a new story that I've been up on,
Starting point is 00:04:54 but Amanda Knox? No, yeah, I saw something about it, but what is it exactly? I don't know. I think she was like murder or something, and now they just when I was walking into studio, they said that she got off free. For what? I don't know. I think she was like murder or something. And now they just when I was walking into studio, they said that she got off free. For what? I don't know. We don't know either.
Starting point is 00:05:10 I thought you would know. I don't know. It's not in my news or anything. It's one story that slipped me. I don't know either, but I did just see that Twitter as well. So follow me on Twitter, sectionally. And Amanda said, wait a minute. But I've been tweeting more.
Starting point is 00:05:22 You have to know, yeah, that's really good. Yeah, I love it. It's awesome. So yeah, that's really good. Yeah, I love it. It's awesome. So, yeah, that's what we got. I'm excited to call our guest, but we can get into a little, unless you have anything else to share with me, we could get into some sex in the news.
Starting point is 00:05:34 No, I'm yesterday at Renner Car. Joe Brown City enjoyed some last minute nice weather before. It was pretty. No, because it's raining today. Yeah, no, it's going to be, the worst day is going to be Wednesday, which sucks is because I have to go to outside concert with Blink-22. Oh. And they said it's going to be horrendous.
Starting point is 00:05:55 Oh, man, why? Do we, this is our summer? People, you have to understand that we don't get a summer. Freezing cold. July, August, but September, October is our holy grail of summer. Yeah, and it's not happening this year And I feel jipped. It sucks. It was nice as weekend Yeah, I think this and then they said it's gonna be nice again I want to see everyone out in sundresses being hot and sexy and like hooking up. That's what I want when it's hot
Starting point is 00:06:19 Oh, they said it should be 80 by the next by like Thursday. Okay. Well, we'll work on that We'll try for that. I will be good. And then what oh, oh, here's some things I have to tell you that my book party is going to be a good vibrations this Thursday from 6 to 8 pm in San Francisco, the one I'm mission and fifth, and you're all invited. If you're in San Francisco, stop on by. I've got my new book called Hot Sacks over 200 things you can try tonight.
Starting point is 00:06:43 You can pre-order on Amazon right now But the actual release date is October 11th, but we will be selling books that night It's gonna be my co-author Jamie Waxman who's actually gonna be a guest on the show this Friday. She's awesome and I really want everyone to go come to the party. It's gonna be really fun. Are you gonna come? I welcome Yay, what time is it? 68 yeah, you can bring your girlfriends or whatever I will come. Yay. What time is it? 68. 68? Yeah, you can bring your girlfriends or whatever. Girlfriends.
Starting point is 00:07:07 Oh, you're a little, you're posse. I'll show you. You can even wear a tiki winky. Oh, I'll show you with a hair. Yeah, dude, hair is even better. No, how much would you give me the show from the tiki winky outfit? Oh, my God, how much do you want? You would probably do it without being paid as the thing.
Starting point is 00:07:21 So I really don't even need the money incentive, the monetary incentive, I don't believe that you do. We'll also be reading your emails today and some topics include, yeah, the theme song. Several people wrote it for the theme song because I was gonna change it, they say not too. That's what I said. Someone wants to talk to the boyfriend about kinky sex. We'll be talking about how to talk to your partner about fantasies and some other things, too.
Starting point is 00:07:49 How do I have an orgasm with your partner? You're able, a lot of women know this is a very common question. A lot of women are able to orgasms no problem with a vibrator by themselves, but when they're with the partner, they can't have an orgasm. And it's a bummer, so we're going to try to give some tips on that. They should get a clonawilly. A clonawilly of their boyfriend and then the pretenders. Yeah, and then they could, then they can try it in different angles and then when they like it.
Starting point is 00:08:15 That's not a bad idea. See, I'm a genius. You are a genius. You're a very ingenious. A clonawilly is where you can clone your boyfriend's or your partner or ex- A friend's penis. You're stopping like your friend's penis, you can clone it. How is that?
Starting point is 00:08:27 That is a good idea, right? Because this way you can figure out. But it's not the same thing because you could be doing it yourself. It's just like you scratching your own back doesn't feel good. Like you having sex with your boyfriend's penis that's in a made into a dildo. Why not? Why not just try it? Why not try it?
Starting point is 00:08:43 clonawilly.com or something. Ask your boyfriend if you can pour mold over his penis and then ship it off. You and didn't someone ask you to do that? You said no. Yeah. Was that you? Yeah. You didn't want your penis.
Starting point is 00:08:57 No, your penis is floating around out there. Yeah. And then she clones that one and that one and that one and that everyone's got a menace still though. And it's just like, no, I'm just saying she she walks around with it showing people I don't like that because you see it goes back to the how girls talked to Talk about everything in depth. Yeah, we do if I had a pocket vagina of my girlfriend I'm not gonna show all my friends look have a pocket vagina of my girlfriend Not gonna happen not gonna show you what a girl would go around showing the guys show.
Starting point is 00:09:26 Yeah, because it's fun. You'd be like, look what I got at the store today. Look what I ordered online today. My boyfriend's penis, here you go. So, but we do, like I guess we have, I've had conversations with the like, how big is he? And I'm like, showing them.
Starting point is 00:09:39 Wow. Is that mean? Yeah, you're gonna talk about this stuff. You guys are the worst. I think for some of friends, I can do that. You guys are the devil, Gipsy and Tricks. We are not the devil. We are not, you're talking about stuff. You guys are the words. Yeah, but I think for some of friends I can do that. You guys are the devil, gypsies and tricksters. We are not the devil.
Starting point is 00:09:48 We are not your hilarious. We are so not. We can call our guests. I guess we can call our now. Okay, what are you going to do? Let's just get into our now and then we'll get into section and use the mail and all that stuff. All right, we're going to try it.
Starting point is 00:09:58 Let's hope it works. We've had some phone issues, but you know, hey. Hey, no, what can you do? Now, can you remind everybody who it is again? Yes, this is Cunning Mix and she hosts a really popular podcast called Polly Amory Weekly. Polly Weekly, sorry, polyweekly.com. And she is awesome.
Starting point is 00:10:21 She's like an expert and she's responsible for, she talks aboutnogamy from a kink friendly pansexual point of view. Hello. Hi, Cunning mix. Hi, how are you? Good, how are you? Can you hear us okay? I can hear you just beautifully. I mean I told you it was the last guest. No, we fixed it. Yay. Well, whatever. So happy to have you. You're okay. The other person in the background, I cannot hear as well. I wasn't talking. I am in my evaluation. Okay. Okay. So, Connie makes high. Okay. So tell me about yourself. Tell me a little about yourself here. I have your bio here, but tell me about your podcast and wait, wait, wait, what you're all about before we get into it. Okay.
Starting point is 00:11:05 Okay. Are we live? Are we on the air? We are live. We are live. Cool. Yay. Hi everybody. Hi. So my podcast is Poly Weekly, Poly Emory Weekly, and it's Tails from the Front of Responsible Non-Minogamy from a pansexual, kink-friendly point of view. Been running for six years into spring of 2005, and it's been a lot of fun. Right. I love it.
Starting point is 00:11:33 And what have you... So, you're a polyamorous yourself? I take it. I am polyamorous myself. Yes. Okay. What's your relationship like? Your polyamorous relationship? Walk me through it. So... If you've won it. So, my polyamorous relationship, walk me through it. So, if you've wanted.
Starting point is 00:11:46 So my polyamorous relationship for the last five years has looked a hell of a lot just like dating. Okay. I totally get that. So I've been, I am virtually indistinguishable from a single girl who is dating who just happens to be really honest about her relationships and has no problem
Starting point is 00:12:05 with dating to her two people at the same time as long as they all know about each other and have met each other. But that being said, I've had a dating relationship recently progressed to the point where we've actually, we're using the boyfriend girlfriend term. And more importantly
Starting point is 00:12:26 i have recently changed my facebook status from single to in an open relationship that's a big one we talk about that all the time you know it's funny is the new facebook profiles you can list multiple girlfriends now you can know which is made of the people of the public community very, very happy. And so he is, he is married, he's been married for 20 years. And I met his wife really early on. She's very cool, very laid back. Sometimes that can be a very stressful meeting. Maybe long term partner for a long time. She was so laid
Starting point is 00:13:00 back and so wonderful. It was just like, you know, hanging out with old friends. It was very comfortable. Met a son and so wonderful. It was just like, you know, hanging out with old friends. It was very comfortable. Met a son and a dog, so everything's all cool. Okay. And Yeah, that's that's pretty much it. I've been enjoying that for we're about five, six months in. Okay. That's been a lot of fun. Now does his son know what's going on? Is it again, does his son know what's going on? Yes. His son is 14. And they have had partners in the past. I think I've had live-in partners, actually, as well. Maybe not.
Starting point is 00:13:33 Okay, I should clarify. Right. No, but that's. Yeah, so yeah, his son's 14. He's really cool. It's like, okay, yeah, cool. Whatever. Right.
Starting point is 00:13:42 When you're at the comic book store, pick me up the next comic book. Exactly. He's like, okay, whatever. No more of the more of the marry are. That's, that's interesting. Okay. So tell me about some of the topics that you cover on your show. I know you recently went to Burning Man. And I know there was some stuff you wanted to talk about that, which is a major festival in the desert here in San Francisco. Yeah. Nevada. Nevada. They started in San Francisco. Yes. Yeah. It's, yeah, it's in the middle of nowhere. No, where I mean, it is well, it is it is a desert in that it does not support life. There is not a single living thing. I know. I mean, I've been I've met my crowed nothing. Yeah. And we accept except 50,000 naked breathing burners. I know. It's so great, right? Now,
Starting point is 00:14:22 what is this sucking smurf spooge? Sucking smurf spooge. Okay. So those who've been ending man will know what I'm talking about when I say autopops and those who have not or had a different childhood from me will not. But so it's in the desert, right? It's very, it's very hot. Although to me, it wasn't that hot. It was only about 90. I'm from Texas. It was right. It was only about 90. I'm from Texas. It was. It was nice to share to me.
Starting point is 00:14:47 Okay, but I had some difficulties with acclimation. It's also at a higher altitude. Plus the bigger problem for me is that I'm not a big party girl and the the the waves go on all night. So I did not sleep for three days straight and because I was listening to this.
Starting point is 00:15:03 Oh, I know it drives me crazy. I don't love that music, but anyway, so I, I had, so I had some physical issues. And I got to this point where I just, I was about to pass out. I had just done the BMI R polyweekly radio show. And towards the end, I was starting to not be able to put sentences together. And then I just sort of like fell over. I couldn't stand up. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:15:26 Yeah, I was, and I'd been drinking plenty of water. I had had some food. I had, I had walked across the playa, but not a lot. I mean, maybe half a mile, a mile, not terribly. Okay. And it wasn't even that high. It wasn't super hot.
Starting point is 00:15:40 I was naked anyway. And we were trying to figure out what was wrong with me. And we figured it's just acclimation and then somebody brought to the green room and gave me an autopop which is basically a plastic tube full of brightly covered, brightly colored icy sludge. Okay, this one was electric blue. Okay, and it had already started to melt in the warmth. So it was basically this gooey electric Oh my god, you never know. We're gonna find in the desert. I'm sucking out of this plastic tube So that was me sucking my smurf spooge. Okay, got it I thought it was a new sexual fetish
Starting point is 00:16:17 I thought it was sexual thing that we didn't know you would think you would think but no It's one of those things that actually sounds far more disgusting than it actually is in real life. Right. Although I don't know if you guys have seen the Smurf porn, but the Smurf porn is very different. No, I love the Smurf's, but I don't know if I want to see them getting it on. That would kind of ruin it for me, but I have not seen a surf porn. I'm a Smurf porn.
Starting point is 00:16:36 It's probably really fun. It's not animated. It's real people painted blue and whistling a little Smurf song or G setting. That is so. That is so. That is terrible if you haven't seen it. Oh my God no I haven't seen it at all. So what kind of stuff do you talk about under? What are the big questions that you
Starting point is 00:16:49 get asked on your podcast being Polly Amherst expert? The the questions I get asked most often would be I am experiencing blah blah blah blah. Is that normal? Right. We get those stories in normal. Yeah. And where do I find my partner? I decided to be Polly. Where are all the Polly people? That's a great question.
Starting point is 00:17:12 How do you find them? How do you find them? That's a great question. I get asked that question a lot. There are people who want to have three sums. I know it's a little different. People who want to swing or have three sums are like, where do we find these people? And we're in San Francisco, but we have an international audience.
Starting point is 00:17:23 So what do you tell people? So, but the short answer is, and this is for Polly, not specifically for Swingy. If you want Swingy and go to a Swing Club, that's the best place to find people who understand, like, with the basic rules of etiquette are. Right. But for Polly people, there are five basic places where it is likely
Starting point is 00:17:42 that a larger percentage of the population will be poly or poly friendly. Okay. So that if you see somebody you like, it's more likely that that person would either be poly or at least not be offended and slap you upside the head if he suggested something. And those places are, okay, so if I can remember off the top of my head. Well, for since we mentioned it, Burning Man, hello. Right. Burning Man is definitely a place to meet your free love, more liberated kind of people.
Starting point is 00:18:09 And second is Pagan Events. So if you go to any type of Pagan type event, again, I'm not suggesting that you go to any of these things and start hitting on people left and right. Right. But you will probably be more likely to find like-minded people at your you know your local burning man events or at a pagan event there are also sci-fi conventions and in here I also lump sci-fi conventions gaming conventions and comic book conventions that's hilarious that's what medicine does I did I want
Starting point is 00:18:39 to actually won this weekend but I'm seeing a poll how do you know you might have they just an approach you maybe i'm i i it it's true and actually i just did the last podcast i did uh... was on the collision of geeks and kink and we actually explored in more detail why it is that this i i i the cifi geek world is so amenable to polyamory and he's alternate relationship
Starting point is 00:19:04 style so that you know you can't specifically poly most of them have at least considered why do you think that is what is the connection would you find out well it was very interesting so i i i did this particular interview with um... Teresa justino who writes for uh... china shop magazine uh... and who also writes for uh... tour and a Pondard who writes for, oh, I think a site is Geeky Sex, is that right? GeekySex.com, Pondards, please don't shoot me if I get it wrong. And Teresa recently researched an article on this very topic, so I brought them in to talk about what the research was. And there are a couple of different theories.
Starting point is 00:19:46 The one being, the big question I want to know is that, you know, the people who are reading, for example, comic books, they want, you know, kinky alternative type relationships. So are the creators simply giving them what they want? Right. Or is it that the people who are writing the sci-fi and geek and all this stuff are those people actually more likely to be sort of kinky and or poly. I was kind of lumping it all together. Right themselves and it seems that it
Starting point is 00:20:20 because of the the fact that in the science fiction realm Because of the fact that in the science fiction realm, the goal of the creators and the consumers of this particular content are already questioning reality. They're already in alternate reality model. So considering an alternate relationship model is really not that weird. Right. And there's also this idea that if you take something that's socially unacceptable but have aliens do it, then it's okay. Right. And there's also this idea that if you put something, if you take something that's socially unacceptable but have aliens do it, then it's okay, right?
Starting point is 00:20:49 Because it's an alien culture. And we're trained in this culture to respect other cultures. So if we had just plain old humans doing it, big problem. But if it's a werewolf and a vampire or, you know, two klingons, then it's okay. So you can also kind of get away with a little more than you can in other contacts right that makes that yeah that totally makes sense that doesn't make sense but i never would have thought that like common book conventions so going to wonder condes here yeah yeah you should
Starting point is 00:21:17 i don't know if you guys know but the the creator of wonder woman william martin is he was polyamorous was known to be polyamorous oh did know that there's been speculation on how kinky he was polyamorous who is known to be polyamorous. Oh, I didn't know that. There's been speculation on how kinky he was, but there is an awful lot of kink apparently in the early Wonder Woman novel or comic books. Yeah, I didn't know that. Oh my god. Okay, so what kind of kink are you into? So I'm into a lot of things. Okay. I'm really into Shibari, which is Japanese-Robondent Suspension. That's interesting. Shibari can be, well, it can be very painful and violent.
Starting point is 00:21:53 It also tends to have a little bit of the woo-woo to it, so you can get to spend it and tie it up, and it's like you're flying, and you could be in this almost like a trance state. So it actually brings with a different kind of realm of people. I'm also into all types of impact play. So, you know, spanking and being hit with various implements, not so much into pointy things. I have some hard limits on pointy things. Okay. Oh, I actually recently discovered, I thought I'd be into it and I was correct I recently discovered I'm really really really into gun and fire arm play. Oh wow. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:29 That sounds kind of dangerous. Sitting, taking, take down, wrestling, wrapping. And so your partners are all into this too. I'm sorry say again. Your partners are all into this too with you. Yeah, different partners would be into different aspects. It's not like each one has the entire checklist. Right. Unfortunately, they never do. Each one, each partner does not care to anything. They're doing it for Paulie right there.
Starting point is 00:22:55 Is he really into these three things and your partner is only into two of them? Are you really going to live your whole life without that third thing? Exactly. That's what, that's why Palaea really makes so much sense. Oh, God. Oh, God. I love Palaea where I really do. I don't know if I've been able to jump into it,
Starting point is 00:23:09 but I appreciate it. I think it makes a lot of sense. But unfortunately, in our culture, there's not many models of it. So people don't really, they still think it's just, you know, alternative. I mean, it is alternative. Obviously, but no one knows, like, people always say,
Starting point is 00:23:22 but does that really work? Emily, to Palaea, I mean, that must be a big question you get asked to, because people always ask me that. Like, can you really show me an example of relationships that work? It works about as often as monogamous. That's what I say, exactly. I'm like, how many happy times?
Starting point is 00:23:38 Yeah, I know several triads and quads and networks that have been together for, you know, more than five years. I know some that have been together for more than 20 years. So, well, my partner, I mean, he and his wife have been a poly for 20 years. So, obviously, it works really well for them. There's a, there's a, I don't think it's really fair to call them a threesome because there's more than that in the family, but there's a well-known triad here in Seattle that published family the web series. If you want a web series, a video, a web video series that makes fun of and while acknowledging all the weird aspects of poly life, you should go watch it.
Starting point is 00:24:18 Oh, that sounds cool. Yeah, because I think a lot of people don't understand even what poly-M re what it is. Like I've said a lot of people like't understand even what polyamory what it is like I've said a lot of people Like oh, it's polyamorous and they really even if it's an Francisco. They don't quite get what it means Well, that's because everybody has a different definition for some people and that's a mistake I made in my first year of being poly is I thought okay, so poly means X and So I when somebody says poly I would assume it meant X and even for us I mean we were I was with a partner and his wife and we were all doing a long term poly thing
Starting point is 00:24:50 for the first time. And we all had different definitions of what X was. We all had different things that we were comfortable with that being. So that's one of the things I say is, with monogamy and polyamory, for God's sake, don't take anything for granted.
Starting point is 00:25:03 Do not assume your monogamous partner has the same definition of monogamy as you didory for God's sake, don't take anything for granted. Do not assume your monogamous partner has the same definition of monogamy as you did. Exactly. Because for some, it means I can flirt, but not have sex. For some, it means I can flirt and have sex when I'm on business trips as long as it doesn't cause any inconvenience to my partner.
Starting point is 00:25:16 And for some, it means you are not allowed to smile or think about another person of the same or opposite gender depending upon your orientation. And there are all variations in between. And the same thing is sort of poly. It's just people shape it in different ways. And we change throughout our lives. I've talked to many people that were very open
Starting point is 00:25:36 and then when they had kids, they closed their relationship for a while and then they opened it up maybe five or three years later. I've heard about that too. Because that's what they needed to do to maintain a healthy relationship. Right. So there really aren't any rules,
Starting point is 00:25:47 which is one of the things that's really tricky about poly. The only rule is communicate. And everything else is kind of up in the air. How long did you date non-poly before you got into the poly scene? So I actually, my first poly experience was with great answer and I was, or well, I'll decide at the time, the early 30s, 30s, 31s, something like that.
Starting point is 00:26:10 So I was, you know, identified as monogamous before that, but mostly because I didn't know what else to be, and I'm a very sort of oddly honest and law-abiding citizen, and so I would never, you know, cheat on anyone. So I basically would break up with somebody if I wanted to date someone else. But when I was a kid, I always had these fantasies about, oh, I'm going to, you know, grow up and meet Mr. Wright and be swept away to Paris by Prince Charming. And then I would continue the storyline with, and then I meet another really great French guy and, oh, wait, wait, how does this work with two? Because I really kept wanting to add another one to my fantasy, but I couldn't figure out
Starting point is 00:26:56 how. Why is we pointed out? Emily, there's no, we don't have any models for this. We don't have any really good happily ever afters for Holly. That we see as part of our popular culture. Right. It does. We really don't.
Starting point is 00:27:12 Now, what do you think about the don't ask don't tell in relationships? Does that work? Like, on the religious be open, but not talk about it? I personally come out very strongly again to don't ask don't tell. Yeah. Because it's a version of the closet and the closet is toxic. I agree.
Starting point is 00:27:27 Other reason I find that it tends not to work very well. And some people do it and it works for them. So try it if it works for you. Hey, don't listen to me. But the difficulty that I see with don't ask don't tell is that if your partner knows you're going out and doing something, but she doesn't know what you're going out and doing something but she doesn't know what you're going out and doing she's going to imagine the worst and the worst will
Starting point is 00:27:50 be based on her own fears and insecurities which is probably a zillion times worse than what you are actually doing. So unless your partner is insanely secure with him or herself, don't ask don't tell can be very, very tricky. Okay. Because you need to communicate. Right, you need to like bring all the love, you have to communicate and bring all the lovers into it and all the communication about who you're seeing and what you're doing and have them do the other one. What? That would work for me. Yeah. Yeah, whatever, whatever you're comfortable with. I mean, some people just will do a check in every now and then there's
Starting point is 00:28:25 some people that basically have a lot of long distance lovers so they're not getting together to watch TV every night of the week. They basically, you know, they'll chat with the, with the an existing partner maybe through I am maybe do a phone call or two partner feels okay. So the whatever level of contact works in order for you and your unit. Okay. Your unit. To be secure is which right. I, one of the things that Pauli, if you get to know yourself really well, and what you
Starting point is 00:28:53 need, and I'm the kind of person that I need pretty, pretty continual contact. Right. Which if I don't see or talk to somebody for a couple of weeks, they tend to be out of light at a mine, and then my insecurities will come into play and you know, we're drama happened. So it's easier just to keep in touch with everyone. Yeah, how often do you have to see your partner? It, you know, it really depends on the partner. Right now, so right now I'm in what I would actually call a reasonably long term.
Starting point is 00:29:23 I don't know if five months is long term, but there we go. In a relationship with a partner and this is actually very unusual because we see each other actually two to four times a week, which is kind of a lot. That is a lot. That's a lot for any relationship. It's kind of a lot and I'm always surprised that he has how much time because one of the things about polyrelationships is time is the one thing you can't get. Exactly. Now, there's plenty of love.
Starting point is 00:29:48 Sometimes there's plenty of money, but there is not always a lot of time. But then there's another partner that, he and I were just kinky partners, were just play partners. Okay. And I see him maybe once a month. Okay.
Starting point is 00:30:02 And it's always like, okay, let's start the scheduling process now because it's going to take a week to schedule this one evening, which is absolutely fine because that's what I really want to be with him. I really like what he gives me. I love our interactions and it's totally worth it to me to go through all that effort to schedule because you know, it's worth it. When it's not worth it, then we'll probably have a talk and stop seeing each other. Exactly. So it's worth it. When it's not worth it, then we'll probably have a talk and stop seeing each other stuff. Exactly. So it's kind of a way of getting all of your sexual needs met. You know, it is for some people that is, that always struck me as kind of a shallow argument for it. Right. It's a little too logical, right, that, oh, well, I am into
Starting point is 00:30:43 thanking and oral sex and shabari in this person only like spanking an oral sex therefore i need to find a second person to do the shabari which sort of makes sense in one way but in another way seems kind of unromantic right i know but it's kind of true though in a way i know you might be shallow but uh... it just sounds like you are a woman who knows what you want, knows what you need.
Starting point is 00:31:06 Monogamy doesn't work for you. And you're saying you've just found ways to satisfy, you know, and you're satisfying them too. It's not that it's one way street. But you just have to. Exactly. Yeah. It's more about, yeah, it's being a grown-up and knowing yourself well enough to know what
Starting point is 00:31:21 you want. And when somebody asks you for what you want, being able to say, yes, I can do that or know I can't. Or I don't know, let's try, let's see what happened. I'm a big fan of, let's see what happens. Right, me too. Let's not commit to anything. Let's just see how it goes.
Starting point is 00:31:37 I wouldn't. I think she should always be, let's see what happens. I totally agree. Now, what about jealousy, 101? We set this in here, we pick tag war. Because that's always a next question that comes up. Like I could never do it because I'd be so jealous and I'm like I tell you but you can overcome jealousy you really can. You can learn to do it like any other issues
Starting point is 00:31:54 you have. How do you have some structured people? Yeah I think your answer is perfect. If somebody comes to me and says I couldn't do it because I'm too jealous. I'm not going to argue and say, okay, all right, if you're too jealous, don't do it. I mean, if you don't want to deal with the drama that jealousy will bring into your life, then yeah, you probably shouldn't be poly. I'm not going to tell you you're missing out because who I'm might say, you know. But if that's a concern, if you want to do it, but you're afraid of jealousy, I would say, well, there are a lot of things we're afraid of, and we do anyway because they enrich our lives in many wonderful ways.
Starting point is 00:32:27 A lot of us are afraid of falling in love, right? And that could be insanely painful, but we do it anyway because it's so rich and rewarding when it does happen. So to me, jealousy is like that. It's something that you can deal with. You know, you have to learn a few tricks. You learn to know yourself really, really well. You learn when your insecurities are being triggered.
Starting point is 00:32:48 You learned what that feels like. I did this, actually. I just did this on the other week. I told the partner, the new boyfriend, and I said, you know what? I am getting to the partner relationship where I am starting to back off and want to run away. So if I start acting weird, that's what's going on. And I'm fighting it, you know, but all the more.
Starting point is 00:33:09 But good for you. You see me doing something weird, because I can sense it. I'm in this place where I'm like, okay, I run away. And I'll start thinking of excuses to not be in this relationship. And it's just a face that I go through. I'm aware of it. Just don't let me act.
Starting point is 00:33:21 Good for you. It's like creative. People live on it myself. Is that you being afraid to commit? No, you're afraid you're going to get hurt, right? I'm afraid of being hurt. Yeah. I've had some really, really terribly, terribly painful experiences of polyamory.
Starting point is 00:33:39 And it is actually, it's worse than monogamy. I mean, one person, you lose one relationship, it's awful. Andogamy. I mean, one person who lose one relationship is awful, and the joy of polyamory is multiplied. So the joy that you get from being in a multiple situation is far more than being a single, but the pain can also be multiplied as well. I'm not going to sugarcoat that. I'm like, hell, it really does.
Starting point is 00:34:00 And I've been hurt in nine ways from Sunday, both in monogamy and in Polly Emory. So yeah, I get scared of being hurt. Okay. That makes sense. That makes total sense. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:12 Did you have any other questions? Okay. Well, thank you so much for being on the show and for sharing all this. Is there any other last things you'd like to leave us with? How can we find you? How can people listen into your podcast? I am really easy to find the podcast. Along with all the show notes is at polyweekly.com,
Starting point is 00:34:26 e-o-l-y weekly.com. You can go to iTunes and do a search for polyamory, hit subscribe, it's free, it will always be free. You can also find me on Twitter, I'm CunningMinks, or Polyweekly, you can follow the show on Twitter. I'm also on Facebook, CunningMinks. If you do friend me on Facebook, tell me how you know me or I won't approve the friend or friend.
Starting point is 00:34:47 We're going to put all the similar apps over it. Okay. And Polly Weekly also has a Facebook page as well. If you just want to follow Polly topics and not my own personal dating links. Okay, got it. I will totally put all this on the website. And I so great to talk to you.
Starting point is 00:35:01 I'm glad we made this work. And good luck with everything. And thanks for sharing all your information information and good luck in your relationships. Thanks so much Emily. It's been a lot of fun. So fun. Okay, Cunning Mix, we'll talk to you soon. Thanks guys. Have a great night. Great day. Bye. Alright, bye.
Starting point is 00:35:14 That's a good night. It's daytime. Ah, you know, people are listening on podcasts. Okay, you know, night or morning. We don't know what the hell it is. It's so weird. I was skyping with somebody from Italy today and it was like Totally sunny and bright and it was like 6 a.m. here Exactly. On dark. Yeah, it was funny. Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:35:33 It's nighttime somewhere. It is nighttime somewhere. Is that why I'm yawning? Maybe. Maybe people are watching this online. They could be anywhere in the world. I know. I love that you guys realize that you can watch the show every day. Yeah. If you become a Frenchman, if it's not. Watch it live or if you can't watch it live, you can download it and watch it on your iPad or iPod or Apple TV. Any tablet. So easy to do or through Stitcher through Stitchery. You can listen on the go.
Starting point is 00:35:59 On the go. It's all good. OK. Sex and the news. OK. Cool. That's some news here for you today. All right.
Starting point is 00:36:04 Good. OK. Two-packed sex video sounds like an X-rated music video. good. Okay, sex in the news. Okay, cool. That's some news here for you today. All right, good. Okay, two-packed sex video sounds like an X-rated music video. A 20-year-old sex tape-starring rapper, two-packed Shakur, suddenly popped up for some reason. Highlights included singing, dancing, and a cameo for money-be from Digital Underground. Oh, yes. And sex, oral only though. Did you see it? I didn't see it. I heard about it today. It just started coming up in the news and more details and details. Right. And actually, if anybody, I probably share this before, but I got my nickname Menace from a two-pock song. It's a big two-pock fan. Love two-pock because he's very popular here in the Bay Area if you're a very young kid growing up. I didn't know that you got it, okay. And I used to live with
Starting point is 00:36:43 one of two-poks childhood friends. Used to be my roommate. No way. He's actually the guy that we call up once a while Ray Love. That, so if you watch some documentaries about two-pok, you'll see Ray in the documentaries. Totally, I remember him. He was on the show years ago.
Starting point is 00:36:58 Yeah, so, but it sounds pretty hilarious. It just like him, there's a singing and getting a blowjob and dancing at the same time. But it sounds pretty hilarious. It just like him is Singing and getting a blowjob and dancing at the same time awesome. That's like all men's favorite thing, right? Yeah, but it's weird that it's just coming out now. Yeah, I know why I'm sure it's got released from the estate or something from the estate I don't know if it's life. I don't know. Maybe just somebody held on to it and they figure it's okay There's always sex tapes released Yeah, but whatever but how How funny is it that you're as a woman you give two-pock a blowjob like 20 years ago
Starting point is 00:37:34 Don't even think anything of it. Exactly. Whatever. Just giving them blowjob and then I don't know where I know That's why people can never do stuff like this because everything comes back to haunt you Hmm, it does not me not yet dude, but just wait codes you lock that up because that's probably a tape Tapes can be found and gone through okay, so everyone destroy your tapes Seriously come on. They just show up. I swear every passwords on your hard drives. I got it Okay Friday was a last day to have sex Friday was the last day to have sex. Friday was the last day to have sex with the animal in Florida legally. What? Friday was the last day that you could legally have sex with the animal. That's weak. At the stroke of midnight,
Starting point is 00:38:15 October 1st, the sunshine states new anti-BCLI law wanted to affect for beating sexual contact and sexual contact with animals. So maybe legal of sex are the humans too. Molds and fungi, however, are a fear game. Molds and fungi. Yeah. Starting last Friday, if you knowingly sex up a member of Kingdom and Amelia for a reason of an accepted animal hasimtree practices, confirming judging practices or accepted veterinary medical practices, it will be a misdemeanor.
Starting point is 00:38:44 Florida is the last one. How funny is it that they even have to? They have to. It's probably still in the books that they were still allowed to. And I'm sure in Florida where all the weird stuff goes down that people were doing that. Last stuff going down on the bayou. A lot of weird stuff going down in Florida, but you cannot have sex with your dog. Not anymore. Thank God. Okay. Couples who watch porn together are more committed. Now here's something all of you fans of porn might want to know. It's good for your relationship.
Starting point is 00:39:12 A recent study found that only not only do 45% of couples watch porn together, but it's a healthy way to bond. Not to mention all the tips and tricks you can learn from watching others get it on. The study which was published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior found that when it came to unmarried couples, their relationship was more committed and sexually satisfying than if one were secretly indulging in porn while the other wasn't around. Communication around sex is a major component in a great relationship and if you can
Starting point is 00:39:38 work a mutual interest from porn, intersex life, and get some spice to those missionary positions that might be getting old. I'm always telling couples, it just seems that couples don't like, it's kind of a man thing. He separates from his partner, goes downstairs in the basement, serves porn. But really, I think a lot of women can be into it. If you find the right kind of porn, they might not be into the same porn that you are, but I'm sure you can find me to agreeable porn and it might bring you closer. You don't need to hide it anymore. Well, okay, what to go over it again, what is your favorite type of porn again?
Starting point is 00:40:08 I don't have a favorite type of porn, but I'd say that like I like the more female-friendly porn with like plots and stuff like that. Plot of chick. Yeah. The plots are so bad though. I don't care. You can laugh at it. Just get straight to the bang in, who cares? Chicks on chicks. That's I like that, the blue doesn't. But people are nervous, so how do I bring it out to my partner and just ask them, just, hey, would you be interested in this?
Starting point is 00:40:30 Then you guys can go to the store together, you can buy a friend's DVD, you could order something online. Screw that, fire TV. Fire TV, F-R-E-TV is awesome, you can go there too, and get your free porn. It's very easy, it's like, it's better in Netflix. Exactly. It's very easy. It's like, it's better in Netflix. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:40:48 Guaranteed. Exactly. So check out your porn. And like, we do research, because there are like stores, like even like Good Vibration Center, just go or Adamaneef.com. When you get free,
Starting point is 00:40:57 you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, you get, get, you get, you get, you get points. Oh, it's just it's ridiculous. I know how crazy it is It's amazing. So check that out
Starting point is 00:41:06 Okay, Prince Albert goes on a date with a woman who is not his wife Rumors of infidelity fly after the prince takes a date not princess Charlene to a charity ball What most brides even non-ro one dream of a fairytale ending once they walked on the album poor princess Charlene A monoco has been plagued with rumors of prince Albert's infidelity since they got engaged. And now prince Albert might be dating a new woman, not in the side button public with everyone to see her. The 50th year old prince attended a charity ball and took a date who was not his brand new wife.
Starting point is 00:41:35 Instead, 33 year old princess Charlene, Albert had a 39 year old American singer named Beth Hart on his arm. Really? How could he do that? He's a prince. Shouldn't they try to be a prince? He's a prince. Shouldn't they try to be a prince? That's why he can do that. Wow.
Starting point is 00:41:47 And he made it father to another love child when he was in relationship with Charlie. And these sounds like a douche. She should dump him. He's a player for life. Yeah. Most guys are, I think, and people change for being a player and not being a player.
Starting point is 00:41:59 I don't know. I don't know. Maybe. I don't know how your player. You think I'm okay. I think I've changed a lot. I don't know. Maybe. I don't know. You're a player. You think I'm a player. What do you think? I think I've changed a lot.
Starting point is 00:42:08 I have something in the news. Tell me, you act like you don't get jealous. No, tell me. Maybe you can ask another woman. I'll give it on a sancer. Okay, go ahead. I was reading today, you know, my new favorite friend who I, it's really not my friend, but I've got him one time, Sean Parker, right?
Starting point is 00:42:25 He was in news today because he was down in Hollywood and he had a, is that some party? And he had a $6,000 bill. He tipped the waitress $5,000. Oh my God. He must've been cute. But he's engaged to a very cute singer. Like, just chicks beautiful too.
Starting point is 00:42:48 Now, as the partner of that person, would you be jealous if your man tipped? No. I think he was awesome. I'd be like, oh my God, she's so psyched. She's a waitress. Yeah, I would think that was awesome. You can see her rent times three.
Starting point is 00:43:02 I would think that's awesome too, but you know. Some chicks get jealous. The chicks that you hang out with are jealous psychos. Oh my God, not the chicks that I just hang was awesome. You just gave her rent times three. I would think that's awesome too, but you know. Some chicks get jealous. The chicks that you hang out with are jealous cycles. Oh my God, not the chicks that I just hang out with. The chicks that you date are jealous. This is something I've observed. Right, I think some women would get really jealous of that. Yeah, this one I'm asking you.
Starting point is 00:43:17 How awesome. You tipped the waitress. That's so cool. We're going home together. You're not owning the waitress. I think it's really cool. Jealousy is something that you can contain and control. Like, Cunning makes us talk about like there are ways
Starting point is 00:43:27 that you can overcome jealousy by working it through because a lot of times when we picture in our minds, oh, he must really like the waitress or oh, he's really into this person, we picture the worst case scenario. Especially with women not to be sexist, but you guys really over-analyze a lot. I know we over-analyze and we go,
Starting point is 00:43:44 we jump to the worst possible case scenario And then you call your girlfriends and then they yeah, they're like oh my god the waiters was she cute That's a third gas on the fire which on a max On a max really makes me think of something that I saw over the weekend on how bad that is I was watching our favorite show the Jersey Shore Would you barely even watch but I was watching it favorite show the Jersey Shore. Would you barely even watch, but I was watching it. And it was the two girls on the show, Snooki and J.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.W.Wi goes to J.W. like, Hey, you're going to have to call your boyfriend. I just heard from my boyfriend that your boyfriend can't come to it. Oh, no. And she's like, man, she was like, so upset. And then some, the other, this other girl that's on the
Starting point is 00:44:34 cast, oh, like, Oh, F that blah, blah, that's ridiculous. Did he, the guy couldn't get out of work. I know. You know, you got to work. You such compassion for that because you work all the time. Yeah. I'm like, the guy couldn't get out of work. I know you know You used such compassion for that because you work all the time and you know I'm like the guy couldn't get out of work. Right. It's not his fault It's not that he's not into you or anything, but all the girls But the girls put the flames in the fire to stoke the flames. They're throwing gas on it. They're throwing gas It's true women do that. That's why I say a lot of women's their best friends is their worst friends Yeah, you know depends if you've, really good friends like I do. Yeah, it's like you're to you are right that women typically are like,
Starting point is 00:45:09 yeah, the worst thing ever and they create the drama and it keeps holding which is so great for television. So bad. I know it is bad. Maybe we feel bad for the guy because he out of all the way for us, he seems the coolest. Oh, really? I couldn't get out. Yeah, it's work.
Starting point is 00:45:24 Yeah, but she's bummed because she wants to never for the show and all that. Yeah. Yeah. I agree that you shouldn't always as a dear girlfriend. No. Especially because if they jealous and they're not in a relationship, they tend to put their project their own agenda onto your agenda. Like if they like our guy treated me that way,
Starting point is 00:45:40 but that's just like you know your relationship better than anybody. So while you can always seek advice from other people, which I think is good to talk to your friends or family people who know you, but at the end of the day, you got to go trust your heart and trust what you think is right. And especially when it comes to work, if a boyfriend, a girlfriend telling you to kind of like slack off from work, like don't do it. Right. I mean, I don't know a married situation might be different.
Starting point is 00:46:03 Right. But I'm saying boyfriend, girlfriend, I've gone through it to where I focus more on relationship than work. Right. And it's gone really bad. You know, yeah, well, for you, I'm telling you, but I'm telling you, if a, uh, if you lose your job, there's a big percentage that you're going to lose your girlfriend or boyfriend too. Right. So just, you know, focus on that. Right. I totally agree. Because if you lose your job that you're gonna lose your girlfriend or boyfriend to right so just you know focus on that right I totally agree because if you lose your job you're just are bumping out and you're gonna lose it. Yeah, you're gonna lose the chick, too Right
Starting point is 00:46:31 Okay, you're right. Okay, military court rules. It's okay for marine to wear uniform and gay porn Because I lifted the dough and asked don't tell right? Sergeant Matthew Simmons an active duty member from the Marine Courts band right? Sarge and Matthew Simmons and active duty member from the Marine Courts Band may be breathing a bit easier today today because a military court rule that it was fine and dandy that he filmed from gay porn movies wearing pieces of his marine uniform. Oh no. That's shocking. Wow don't ask don't tell Fallad how soldiers making gay porn is just hunky-dory. The US Navy Marines Court Council of Criminal Appeals ruled that Simmons should be
Starting point is 00:47:13 Resentance for guilty plea to misusing his uniform. So I can't believe the Marines are letting him like do gay porn in his marine uniform That just seems illegal. Yeah, I Know there's nothing wrong with the gay porn. It's not that. It's just official attire Like if you okay if you're a cop and you're doing porn, no matter if it's gay or not, don't be wearing your official gear. It can be, it can be costume, you know, but don't be, don't be wearing the official stuff.
Starting point is 00:47:38 I totally agree with you. Yeah, I got it. It's like gay porn. I don't know, there's some things are sacred. Like the military, you're in the military, and I think you could wear something else. It's like gay porn. I don't know. There's some things are sacred like the military You're in the military and I think you could wear something else. Maybe some chops. Yeah, something like that You can definitely get a fake uniform. Yeah, but not your real one that we're paying good tax dollars for Yeah, I wouldn't I want to want them to wear it in a straight porn either. Yeah, I totally agree
Starting point is 00:48:01 Tarnishing the military. Yeah, We will on the list, turns the military. Okay, Kabbalah Cure, Demi Moore, an Aston Kutcher who over means silent on a marriage split and reports of him cheating with blonde Sarah Leo Lial, both spent yesterday morning at the Kabbalah Center in Los Angeles. You know, Kabbalah is the religion that they're way into.
Starting point is 00:48:19 The two arrived and left separately. Aston looked worried, well Demi left out of a side door to avoid being seen. Reports of the couple have been undergoing cabalic counseling in recent months. Oh, no. Yeah, but maybe they'll come back together but it doesn't sound like it, right?
Starting point is 00:48:32 It sounds like we read on Friday that they are getting divorced. Yeah, that's weird because he tweeted out a song by Run DMC and the song is, don't believe the hype. Oh, so what is that mean? But that's all he said. Like, it's not like Jada Pinkett and Will Smith, like, we don't have problems.
Starting point is 00:48:50 This is bull. Right. You know? Right, exactly. Just hit it head on. They're not saying anything, so you know there is problem. There is problems with their therapy, but that's maybe they'll work it out, but it doesn't sound like it.
Starting point is 00:49:01 Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, for no, there are people. There are people. Amazing thing for couples. If you're in a relationship, you're thinking like we're having struggles, we're not getting anywhere. I've seen so many couples go through couples therapy, and you know, to go forever, you can go for six weeks, eight weeks, and me the longer the better. But you really can break through these relationship issues that you're
Starting point is 00:49:17 happening. If you go see a therapist, I believe. Yeah. I know that to be true. I, I believe it's it's good to talk to the therapist right figure out what your problems are But if you're depending on a therapist to fix your problems, then you're an idiot right? I'm sorry, they can't fix them But they can give you the tools to talk to your partner because a lot of times partners it cottons right and they keep I've been the same kind of conversations over and over again, and they't know how to get out of the rut. And the therapist can kind of be the third party that's like, okay, you guys are talking about this and here's I use chandel and here's I use channel and they teach you new tools.
Starting point is 00:49:51 Yeah, that's the problem I had with therapy because when I ended up going with one of my significant others who was already in therapy, it started going to sessions with her, the talk things out. That's a problem. The problem that I had was I and we recognized and we talked about it. I knew knew what the problems were and I knew what to do to resolve it, but you can just never get over that hump. It was the same. It's like we know what's going on. We use the same argument over and over again. So there's those to sort of get you out of that same argument and the new ways to give you. Yeah. And it just that that's the problem with me. It was a changing. So there's those sort of gets you out of that same argument and new ways to give you. Yeah, and it just, that's the problem with me.
Starting point is 00:50:27 It wasn't changing. So that's why I knew how to do that. That's why you had to end it. Right. Well, if it wasn't changing, it wasn't helping that you had to end it. Yeah. But I think it was, it was really good. Yeah, a lot therapy, big fan,
Starting point is 00:50:37 but you gotta be ready to change if you're gonna do it. Exactly. You have to want to change and all that stuff. Okay, emails. Yes, you had a really good one about how I was right again No, I didn't yeah, it was about the intro Can we oh someone said that we should keep the intro? I don't think I have this on here We got a few about it, but someone did say keep the intro keep the inter keep the intro
Starting point is 00:50:58 I love it. It's on in here right now and that's what I said and you're like no, we got a change I'm just thinking the intro. I've had it for six years, I should do a new intro. How long until Oprah started changing her intro? I don't know, did she not change it that much? I'm probably not. Okay, so I'll keep it. I'm gonna keep it. Oh, great, is that what she did?
Starting point is 00:51:17 We're like, look into your eyes, man, so spice x, people like it. Okay, hello again, I wanted to shoot this by you too. Which would you prefer from a sexual encounter? Hands only, no mouth or mouth only, no hands. It's from Dell, and Boyton Beach, Florida. He's a premium, sends friends with benefits member. Hands only, no mouth or mouth only. Like a first date? date. No, no, no sexual encounter first sexual X like you're with some chick. Would you rather have her mouth or her hands on you? Probably your mouth. Yeah, I think hands
Starting point is 00:51:57 Really? Yeah, you don't want to make out. Oh, I kind of want to make out but no hands in I don't know That's tough. I like I love hands like all over my body. Like, if a guy runs his hands up and down my body repeatedly, like just cuddling and touching, it feels amazing. And he could use his fingers and other areas. That's not something I do right away though. It's strictly making out and maybe like a hand on the body, but I'm not like moving it all over the place
Starting point is 00:52:22 because I want to come off as a creeper. No, but it feels good. You're right. Maybe not the first time. I can't answer. I can't answer this question. This is a very difficult question, but I love mouth. I love making out.
Starting point is 00:52:35 I love the mouth and other parts of my body. So you could kiss me all over my body and that would be fine. Yeah. Yeah, maybe mouth then. See, I'm bringing you over to my side. Bring me over to your side. Okay Emily is there a way to get a theme song for your show. I love it's catchy. I love it It's catchy and funny love the show very entertaining and your voice is perfect. Thanks Mason
Starting point is 00:52:54 The name of the song is martini bomb. I'll tell you find it Martini bomb. Yeah, we got it years ago and I can't remember what else, but it's called martini bomb And it in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart.
Starting point is 00:53:11 I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart.
Starting point is 00:53:19 I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't remember what's in the heart. I can't heard of this. Is this a common fetish for guys? He claims it is. Is it unhealthy? I just don't know if I can do it. Any advice or help will be appreciated, Jamie from Irvine, California. Like a bird cage? Well, there's like little
Starting point is 00:53:34 penis cages that you could lock in at some men or into that kind of stuff. I don't think it's not normal. I think that men have their kinks. Um, I like a muzzle. Like it looks like you're even more. I never actually seen one, but I think there's like, he probably wants her to, he's probably need to be dominated. Oh, it's going to look for one. And having his penis in a cage, I don't know, you can do it. I get that you don't know,
Starting point is 00:53:58 you can do it, Jani. And um, but I would try it once and see if you can do it. Because a lot of times there's things that were like, no, wait, could I ever do that? But I think if you try it and see why he's into it, maybe you can find a variation on that. Maybe he just needs his penis in your protection. He said, what came up was penis cages and chastity. Kind of like a chastity.
Starting point is 00:54:18 Yeah, like lock it up, lock up his penis. That's kind of a common thing like ferment. And it is a common fetish for guys. And I think it's healthy. I think fetishes are healthy as long as he doesn't take to a stream. But I don't I know that you don't know if you can do it, but I would say that my advice to you would be just to slowly try it, talk it through, ask as many questions to him as you can.
Starting point is 00:54:36 Maybe he's never even done it and he doesn't know yet, but maybe there's like some variation in that theme you can do, but I would say it would definitely bring you guys closer together to put his penis in a cage. Oh, you probably like this because they can't use their penis. Look, see? Oh, my God. It's like a chastity. It's chastity.
Starting point is 00:54:52 He can't use it until he- I don't know if you can see that. It's probably to write. He can. So he had his just Google penis cage. Yeah. I think, yeah, men get, men get through all of that. Men get off on
Starting point is 00:55:06 Chasity belts, you know, like oh, that's right. No totally maybe it's just but he gets off on her only being able to yeah She's like she will he wants you to be the owner of his penis. I think it's gonna hot I think you should go for it. Janey stop over over worrying about it If you don't like it, you never have to do it again, But I think with sex, you should try whatever you want, try everything once. Not everything. Don't lose the key because I don't lose the key because then you can't pee, you can't do anything. But I would take try it, Janie, and I think it is kind of normal and it's not unhealthy. No. That's what I got to say for you. And that's all we have time for today. Thanks, cutting mix from Polly Weekly. You got to check her out.
Starting point is 00:55:42 We'll post all our information to the show.

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