Shawn Ryan Show - #83 The Methods Victor Marx Used to Overcome His Terrifying Childhood | Part 2

Episode Date: November 14, 2023

Victor Marx is a high risk humanitarian, former U.S. Marine, author, filmmaker, and lays claim to the World's fastest gun disarm. In part two, we get into Marx's humanitarian work with All Things Possible. His missions have taken him all over the world to Iraq, Syria, North Africa and Southeast Asia – mostly in non-permissive and high threat environments. His work focuses on orphans and widows that are victims of war, abuse and crimes against humanity. Shawn Ryan Show Sponsors: https://lairdsuperfood.com - USE CODE "SRS" https://bubsnaturals.com/shawn - USE CODE "SHAWN" Victor Marx Links: Website - https://victormarx.com | https://iamvictormarx.com Contact - https://victormarx.com/contact IG - https://www.instagram.com/victormarx X - https://twitter.com/victormarx Please leave us a review on Apple & Spotify Podcasts. Vigilance Elite/Shawn Ryan Links: Website | Patreon | TikTok | Instagram | Download Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

These side marios all you can eat is all you can munch a soup salad and garlic homo Previously on the Sean Ryan show my stepfather used to hold my mom at gunpoint You just sitting at chair and you hold a pistol at her And get her to say things that weren't true Get her to announce God, all evil. My stepfather was in counterintelligence in the army. I never forget the first time someone asked me after doing the gun disarm.

Well, motivated you to get that fast. I'll never forget. I'll never forget my brain saying one day, one day. I'll be so fast. No one will ever be able to hold a gun to me. Kids who are born in the fire won't be burned by the heat of life. The other thing I would tell adults of Ivers is, you know,

don't lose hope. I've worked with so many men who are just like, I couldn't stop it. The best weapon I've ever used for my soul was forgiveness. That is maybe the most powerful thing I've heard in this room. Alright Victor, we're back from the break. That was a super heavy segment previous to this. And we kind of ended on talking about forgiveness.

One thing that we didn't touch on is how you got yourself out of there as a child. Yeah, it was, well, the night we left, the pedophile, stepfather was a night that he came home drunk, which was, you know, there's two types of drugs. There's a happy jovial drunk, and then there's the main one, and he definitely was a happy jovial drunk and then there's the mean one and he definitely was a mean one. So he came home drunk and he's yelling and screaming at my mom and it was based on the electric

bill. That's what he was using that night. And why does electricity bill so high? And all that, then he ended up pulling out his gun and walking around the outside of the house, shooting all of our spotlights out in the corners of the house, boom, shooting them. And I mean, even me as a kid, you know, of course we're freaking out, at least, but I'm shooting him. And I mean, even me as a kid, you know,

of course we're freaking out, at least, but I'm thinking, why in the world, you know, you just turn the lights off. How does that even make sense? But when he starts shooting, everything, and yelling, and he's walking around the house, my mother grabs us and the kids who were there. We ran into the back room room and then ran into a closet

like we're hiding. And my mother kept the door open to the room to try to throw them off. But when he came in the house and we're all, in our doors, cracks that we can see and just intense, gosh, those intense, and he started saying, where are y'all? Where are you? You better come out.

And that was like a horror movie right there. And he got to the door of the room. And I mean, we were, I mean, we're all just trying to make a sound. We're terrified because I like a good thing about us who walk into there and just shoot in us in the closet. And my mom was worried for that as well. But she started praying. She started praying to Jesus quietly, calling out to the Lord.

And I mean, look, I was like nine years old or something. I'm thinking, Jesus, the Jesus I know from Sunday school, he's a really nice one. He's breaking bread, hand in fish out. He's on the felt board Jesus, he's going up to heaven. He doesn't really look masculine or capable, just loving.

And I'm like, ah, we need a different type of, we need like a ramble Jesus right now. I mean, it's like we need someone who can flex and get something done. And then my mother started praying this, the blood of Jesus covers the door. The blood of Jesus covers the door. And again, I'm thinking, whoa, what's that going to do?

What happened next made me really understand that Jesus was alive. And that his blood, there was something powerful about it because with a drunk stepfather at the door to the room, holding the pistol, looking in and seeing the closet door. He's looking at the angle, but he hasn't come in. And he said, come out or I'm coming in. And my mother just probably just goes, though, because we had no other options. There, and a lot of times in life,

when you have nothing else but Jesus, you go to Him real quick. And my stepfather couldn't enter the room. Something physically restrained him from crossing into an open door, a barrier. And he was so mad, he couldn't get through and he's growling. He's like, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah,

and I remember just, call what? What's happening? That was like my first. Again, this is the guy that abused me and was crazy and had my mom, you know, with a gun and hurt my sister and rape and all this.

And I said he can't get in the room. I'm thinking what? What is this about? But I knew Jesus had to be real, because nothing else would stop him. And he left. He went lay down. And my mother were waiting from the pass out.

And we didn't want to run down the hall because there's bedroom, there's bedrooms right on the other side. So my mother opened this window in the room and it was small and she starts pushing us through. And she said it was Ron just start running and these were this was a nicer area at the time nice homes nice land and we're just running we're just running through Just running, we were just running through this dark woods area, trying to get to neighbor's house.

And I mean, I could remember there was so much fear because you just, you can imagine them just coming out and running after you and like a monster. And then before my mom could get out, the telephone rings. We had one phone in the house for us, the family was in the kitchen, the kind that hung up with the long cord. And my mother was scared for my sister to come home. Because she's like, once we leave, if any of the kids come home, like my sister or brother, he might kill him.

So as we're launched, I was slow, they'll run in the phone rings. She's hoping he's passed out. My mom tippy toes down the hall into the kitchen, that's the phone. She goes, don't come home, don't come home. It's like she just needs to say a few things and run out the door.

It's she, and that's what she hears. Rita, coming to the room. It was my stepfather. That's how he pulled her out of the room. Cause back in the day, old phones, you could dial a number, hang up, and it would automatically call your phone ring. That's how he pulled her out. So she then she's talking to one of the kids real quick

and that she hears this pretty evil voice. And she had real presence of mine. She said, okay, I'll be right there. She goes, I just need to use the restroom first. And she puts the phone down, doesn't hang in up, puts it down, and runs out the front door. The side door of the garage runs around,

ends up finding us. and we end up going couple of houses down across the street. And it was a Christian family. And we felt safe, and they'd have called the police. And we never went back for, you know, like they got them out. We ended up moving to different city. And actually, I never went back to that house until, gosh, like 30 years later. And when I went back, it was that time I was traveling through. And I went

to that house after, actually it was before I met with him. And it was like, again, I felt like the Lord said, go to the house you lived in. And then I was, I mean, that was more terrifying to me than meeting with him because it was like first encounter and, oh my gosh, not that house. And I was weird. My mind was just thinking, oh my gosh, it's got to be monsters and there's something. I mean, I'm full grown man thinking, I don't want to go to a house. But I did. I trusted God, obeyed him, knocked on the door. I remember stepping back. I didn't have a gun or anything. I was like, I don't

know what's going to come out of this house. The door opens. It's an elderly lady like gray hair, you know, definitely 70s, maybe close to 80, just like, whoa, hi, just going to help you? I said, oh, yes, ma'am, I'm not a salesman because I was dressed in a suit. And I'm like, I said, I actually worked for a ministry and I said, this is gonna sound odd, but I said, I just live here. She goes, you did. She goes, who's your dad? And I told her, she goes, my stepfather.

She said, I bought this house from him. And now we're just standing there as awkward and she goes, bad things happen here, didn't they son? She goes, man. She went about this house. She goes, you know, the neighbors told me what had happened in the abuse and the evil. Shit, I'm sorry, you you had to go through that.

That's a man, me too. And she just would like to come in. I was like, uh, sure, walked in the kitchen. She goes, wait right here. I want to show you something. And again, I can just film my anxiety just going up like, how do I get out of this house quick? She comes back and she said, she's holding something. She goes, when you're left, and I'all had to escape. I heard the story. She goes, Y'all didn't take anything. Y'all just fled.

She goes, I bought the house. And all y'all stuff was here. And she said, we gave away most of it to goodwill and whatnot. She goes, but I kept this picture. And she lays it down. It was a picture of me and my brothers and sisters. 30 years, she's kept the picture. I said, why?

She goes, I pray for you all the time. Except you know, you know, you know, you've even met us. She goes, I know, but God, have me pray for you. I've been praying for you all these years. I've never stopped. I said, that's me right there. And I said,

I mean, I was... I couldn't believe it. Never met this woman. And here she's been faithfully praying. I said, wow, I remember saying something to the fact that, well, I made it. I said, I'm married family. And I'm in ministry, Christian too.

And then she's like, I can't think enough of praying. Your prayers kept me alive through some really hard, difficult times of my life. And then we're talking and I said, you know, we escaped through the back room, through a window. We were hiding in a closet. I said, you know, we escaped through the back room, through a window. We were hiding in a closet. I said, do you, do you mind if I see it? Like, I want to see if, is it really how my mind remembers? She said, sure.

So she started walking down the hall and my body's getting rigid like, oh, she comes back and she grabs my hand. Tenderly grabs my hand, she walks me back there. I walk in, I'm like, yeah, there's a closet. It was everything so much smaller. Cause it's bigger when you're a kid. I'm like, whoa, that is a small class. And then the window, I was like, wow. That's where we escape. So it was, I told her, I said, man,

God kept you alive. Yeah, I mean, for me to come back and thank you. And actually, when we made the film, the documentary, we went back and interviewed her for it. And she's in it. And I was just a couple of years after it was complete, and she got to see it. She went to heaven. It's a really special part in the film to see the power of prayer and the faithfulness of people praying for you. We didn't even know it. So

it was last time ever. I have no desire to go back. Yeah, I'm a punksite ticket. Oh, bad. You know, it sounds like everybody around you in your childhood had some type of generational trauma. Ladies and gentlemen, it has been a minute since I've done a Bubb's natural's commercial, but it has not been a minute since I've taken the best shit of my entire life.

Actually, just not to one out this morning, it was amazing. And I'm gonna give you the secret. You ready? Here's the secret. You want the secret for the best shit of your entire life that you could do, I don't know, every day, maybe multiple times a day.

Here's the secret. Bubs Naturals' Calligen peptide says it's good for joints, hair, skin, and nails. I'm surprised I don't put on there, it'll give you the best shit of your entire life, but hey, I get it, right? And you mix that with the Halo Creamer, that's MCT oil, put these two together,

you're gonna have a explosive hell of a day. These things are both whole 30 approved, NSF certified and USDA approved. So there's that on top of that. Hold on, wait, there's more. If that doesn't get you going, which I guarantee you, it will, you've got Bubs new coffee.

So this is the first ever coffee bean whole 30 approved. You can believe that. And we all know coffee can, you coffee can speed things up a little bit in the morning. But hold on, wait, there's more apple cider vinegar gummies. Guys, I'm gonna be honest, I don't know exactly what these things do for you. But here it says, promotes energy, immune support, promotes healthy digestion,

and supports healthy metabolism. I can tell you one thing. Good luck just eating one of these things because at the end of the night, I will crush an entire bottle of these. That will not give you the best shit of your life. I wouldn't recommend it. It will speed things up,

but you may not like the final outcome. And hold on, wait, there's more. There's more. Bubs came out of a lot of new products. They have these hydrate or dye, hydration packets. The great for post workout. All this stuff is great for post workout,

especially the college and protein. Guys, here's another thing about Bubs. Bubs is a tribute company. It's named after Glenn Bubs, Dordy, who is a Navy SEAL and a CA contractor. He died defending our freedom in Benghazi. And Bubs donates a portion of every order to the Glenn Dordy Foundation.

And they donate 100% of the proceeds from their products on Veterans Day every year. I love this company. They are just solid people with a solid product and they just won everybody to experience the best shit of your life go to bubsnaturals.com Use the promo code Sean for 20% off And let's get it going Your stepfather, I don't know if he had generational trauma or if he was just the way he was but Sounds like your mother came from a long line of it. Sounds like your father came from a long line of it.

What can we talk about that? How far back does it go on both sides? You know, it's hard to tell, but I know my mom's mother was divorced and married. I know my mother's dad didn't claim early on as his own kid, so she suffered with that pain of rejection. Again, I think rejection is one of the mother loads betrayal when you'll be treated by a family member with incest or them selling you out or allowing stuff to happen. And it does. I would say sometimes I pray for people and they definitely have generational trauma. And here's the great news. It can be stopped.

How about your dad's side, your biological dad? so my biological dad He is mom and dad didn't make it they were divorced and He for a time period he was put in St. John Bosco's Home for boys that's where he learned out of box and fight and His dad my grandfather was a professional price fighter We learned how to box and fight. His dad, my grandfather, was a professional price fighter. And then a pro boxer fought in Madison Square Gardens.

But he died in a mental hospital because of a head trauma. He was in the Philippines during the war and he was giving kids food off of his ship. He was a merchant marine and the shore patrol bit one and don't it because they claim the kids could be bringing us into the Japanese and he was like, well, I'm not throwing it out. These kids are starving. So he directly didn't listen to him. And the second or third time they came and they were going to rest him. And he didn't take lightly to that. So when they tried to, he knocked a guy out.

Again, he had hands. He was a, so he knocked, you know, the guy out, the knock to no one out. And then, a bunch of them jumped on them with clubs, but they beat his head in to where they actually had to put a still plate and we said, and back then, we had the technology or the tools. So I think you got a lot of rust.

So he ended up being placed after the war in a mental hospital. It's called Louisiana State, Pondville State Hospital. I looked up the records and then I talked into one nurse that was there when he was there, because I think he died when he was around 40, but I talked to this elderly lady and she says,

oh, I remember your grandfather because he was a prized fighter and then he was a boxer and she says he was the nicest guy. He was real calm and very caring. She said he could sure swap a deck. She goes, you know, that was his role. He's mopping. She said, one time, when people still talk about it, he's mopping the hallway

and one of the, when the inmates busted loose, a big guy and started attacking people. And he was ring running down the hall so they start yelling from my grandfather, watch out Mr. Marks. They said he's mopping, he sees the guy and he pulls the mop to him and he gets as close as he can to the wall to his gallery room and he said, when the guy got running fast right about here, they said your grandfather just did a hook punch and knocked them and his head

hit the guy and he slid on the wet floor. They said he just kept mopping. Never even thought of it as a thing. They were laughing. They were able to get the dude in straight jacket and put him in a room. But that's the same hospital. My biological dad went to. Your dad went to a mental hospital as well. Same one. When my mother left him and it was horrible circumstances. And again, I wanna honor my mom, so there's things I don't need to say. But my dad, yeah, he got put in the same mental hospital

for homosignal tendencies, a breaking reality or something. So, and then, then what I go through, I literally, you know, I remember going, oh my gosh, it is, I mean, is my next, is this like a time share for our family? Cause you do, you do feel like that. And you hear these whispers, Hey, your grandfather, your dad, and now you. And there's always abuse and a trauma associated with it. And, you know, I certainly,

I remember telling my wife, maybe I should just go, why I started becoming a little functioning and struggling. So maybe I should just, you shouldn't do power of returning, just put me in a place. I'm causing you pain and, you know, I just, I can't get ahold of this. And my wife is like, no way, no way. And she's like, you need help. And because we've been separated twice, but my wife's, you know, we said we will never get divorced.

Never. And that's the one thing no matter how bad things got her. I'm losing touch with reality or struggling or dissociating or whatnot. My wife She's like, hey I'm never gonna divorce you I will stay with you. She goes because I know you love God. I Know it has a bigger plan for your life. You don't even know of yet, Victor But you have his favor. She would always say you have God's favor, Victor. But you have his favor. She would always say, you have God's favor, Victor.

I'm like, what good is God's favor when I can't even function? I'm having flashbacks. So she stayed. There were a couple times she had to leave. I mean, one time I loaded it up in the car with the kids. I'm like, I'm on meds. I don't even know what's going on. I had put out at a bad neighbor. So I'd put out a weapon and I'm just tracking him through his house. I'm thinking, man, I could smoke this dude. And she's like, you know, that's not normal. I'm like, I know. But again, all these crazy thoughts. I know this. God made us to heal.

He made the mind to heal. And the power of God can break any type of dysfunctional or even demonic you know legacy from your past he can I'm convinced of it I think a person has to be convinced of it because the name of our organization is with God, all things are possible. And it takes faith, it takes belief that the Word of God is truly holy scriptures. And then if you apply it to your brain, and that's been the key thing. And this is what I'm telling people right now. These sacred scriptures have made the difference in my life. One, second Timothy, one seven, which I sign on the board. And it's, God has not given me a spirit of fear,

but power of love and a sound mind. I've chanted that like a mantra, tens of thousands of times, just God's not give me a spirit of fear, but power, love and a soundline, ever soundline. Romans 12, too, don't be conformed to this world any longer, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind that you may be able to prove what is the perfect good, acceptable will of God. It's scriptures like I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. So when people find themselves failing, struggling in a cycle they don't wanna be,

they have to start to learn who their identity is in Christ and what weapons they can access. First is the power. Another scripture says, the same power that raised Christ from the dead, raised Christ from the dead, not dwells in me. And do I believe it? Yeah. Did it take me a while for my know to really know?

Yeah. And that's what you have to stand on or else Doctors will label you and you'll never get be on a label people will label you and They'll speak negative thoughts on you people from your past It affects you. I mean this is funny to me, but it's it's a good point My fighting weight and adult weight was always 181 I'm 6-1

181 So as I was thinner speed, but that's what I wanted and I started working out with a friend He was on a TV series called American Gladiators. And his name is Darren McBee, but Malibu was his actress name. He's the blonde guy. And we working out. I never forget, he goes, Victor, you can be bigger.

I was like, oh, not really. This is me, man. I'm 45. I'm pretty much, he goes, no, not really, this is me, man. I'm 45. I'm pretty much, he goes, no, you can change your body structure. You can be stronger, you can be better. He goes, I said, well, I don't want to lose my speed. That's my, that's my, that's my thing, because you won't. And then he's like, he keeps speaking this into me.

And then he actually like drew a picture or a painting that was kind of awkward. Where it's, yeah, it's me when I was sure doing a flying kick and that kind of sparkles. I'm like, okay, it's kind of odd. He's like, I don't look like this there. And he goes, I know, but you can. And he's just, you know, you can. I don't like, okay.

Well guess what? I start working out. I get, I change some approaches to protein. I check my testosterone level. And then, you know, over probably three to three years, four years, you know, I get up to two, fifteen, eleven percent body fat, and I didn't lose my speed. I'm like, good night. But here's a deal. I remember as a kid, a relative saying, oh, he's pathetic. He'll always be scrawny. He'll never do. And not like imprinted in my mind. She wasn't even speaking it to me. She was saying to someone else, but I heard it. And I was like, that was an imprint into my soul.

And so again, I mean, that's one example, but yeah, I don't have to be an alcoholic. I don't have to be addicted to drugs I do not have to be a serial You know person that gets married again and again or cheat on my wife and in order to break that stuff that Generational stuff you have to decide do you want to follow God's way or do you want to follow your family's way? That's so important because my brother, one of my brothers,

when I met Eileen, and we got engaged, he's like, I never forget he was so mad, how is she? I said, how is she? He goes, how is she in bed? I said, look, Mike, you know I'm a new Christian. So is she? I said, we're trying to do a God's way. In God's way is like, you know, we've had relationships, we've done it the world's way and other things, you know,

we're, although you think you're full grown, but you're, you know, 22, it's like your kid. But I said, we're going to do God's way this way. And he's like, what? And he says, are you telling me you're not going to have sex with her until after you're married? I said, yeah, it's what I'm telling you. So the Bible says, I don't ever forget, he goes, hey, man, all right, we'll brother come here He goes, I know you and this Jesus thing good for you. Everybody needs a little bit of Jesus and He goes you can't marry a woman without like testing to see if you're all sexually compatible and

Actually, I mean Sean at that moment, I was like, oh How do I know? And actually, I mean, Sean at that moment, I was like, oh, I mean, he has a point. What if we get married and it's like, oh, I don't even, does it even. And then I was like, Lord, I'm new to this and I'm trying to follow you. Your Bible says it's fornication or duped,

we're supposed to wait. So he kinda has a point. What if something got, and then my brother's kinda looking at me like, what you gonna say? You know I'm giving you wisdom, but it was worldly wisdom according to my family's trait, right?

God gave me the perfect thing. I never forget, I like him, I said brother, because he's a park collector. And he's got some cars. He's got the Eleanor. He's got, I mean, he's, he's got cars. I said, you like four of his, right? He goes, of course. I said, so if we went right down here to the four of dealership, it to you. They give you the key and the title. It's your signover. The only deal is you can't test drive it. You just have to

leave with it. I said, would you take it? He goes, yeah, of course, I don't need to test drive it. I'm like, I don't need to test drive. My fiance either. She's a Ferrari. And I said, I'm going to do a God's way. I've got 35 years married now. Never cheated or been cheated on. And for people who don't wait, all I say is, that's one way to do it. But the best way, the best way, especially when you want to practice and know you won't cheat on your spouses,

is, well, don't cheat before. Wait, so you have self-control. And then when you're married, for people who've been, you know, at intimacy before they're married, commit to God, ask for forgiveness. Tell your bride, hey, I didn't know better, but I apologize. Had I known better, I would have waited, because you're worth waiting for. Something as simple as that, that's so sincere, can do so much for relationship.

But yeah, it's renewing your mind and those times you can't follow your family's pattern. And certainly you don't believe the whispers in your ears of, hey, this is just, hey, you can't. And it's always you. That's when you know there's demonic whisperers coming when they're saying, you can't, you won't. Do you really? That's a third person, that's a different party. That's not your mind doing a self-assessment. It's an interesting point. With everything you've been through as a child and you know, we haven't even gotten

into the Marine Corps or the martial arts stuff yet, but I mean, when did you... When did God come into your life? When did you accept? When did you seek? Yeah. Well, I remember being six years old in a church service and they gave us called an alter call where the preacher says, if you want to give your life to Christ, you want to have the assurance of heaven

Come forward. And I remember thinking this is a six-year-old. Well, I don't want to go to hell He cleared explain what that is Heaven sounds like the better choice. I'll do that. There's no brainer and I got up and walked down by myself And the pastor said, good for you young man and He prayed for me. And I remember when he prayed for me, I had a very distinct vision. And it was Jesus at the top of a pedestal. And I was walking up the steps to him and he reached out his hand. And I remember the moment he grabbed my hand. I was out of the vision. I mean it was so clear and and this is what I know. That's not the moment I actually committed my life to Christ. It's the moment Christ showed me I've got you. I've got you into the day you do. And it was actually in my time in the Marines.

I did a very short stint, three years. My commander-in-chief was Ronald Reagan. And I was a calm guy who then became a shooter and I sat on Western Division matches. Nothing was going on much. Had been that time period, but I remember, I had this very distinct feeling in my life and I got heavily involved in martial arts. And you know, as a young man, he's one tester

metal. Like, do I have what it takes to be a man? How far? So join the Marines doing that. Learning how to fight the completely different way. And then of course chase women, And then of course chase women. That's, you know, my recipe for manhood from my lineage was you got a drink, fight, and chase skirt. I know you like her. Never stepped back from a fight and chase skirt. And that's really what I, that's what a man is, that I had been taught.

Here's the problem. I started meeting girls in the Marines who could do the same thing. And probably better than me, just as good as drinking. They get older on fighting and they get a lot more women than me. And I'm like, well, that don't make her a man. There's something skewed about this. And then I started feeling this sense of emptiness, like something's not right.

I became pretty proficient in martial arts. And I was like, man, I've, I've, I mean, I've checked off all the list, but something's missing. And then I get a letter from my biological dad. And this was, this was so bizarre because what led up to that is I was out partying on a New Year's Eve night. I used to hit black clubs dancing and juking all this stuff. My friends in the rink were one was a black guy from Louisiana, one was a Mexican from LA,

and one was part Native American. I mean, it was as funny, our little bunch, but I'm not part of you, and I remember taking SSMT. This is futile, and I was driving back to Camp Pendleton from LA. My buddies passed out, you and I got a big stereo, got the car, and I'm twisting through the dial and I come across a preacher.

And the preacher's name was Greg Laurie, just an evangelical type preacher. And what he was saying made sense. And he wasn't screaming, he was just kind of talking. What he was saying, it was truth that I need to hear. And I remember after listening to him, I would get up every morning and listen to him. It was early morning for some come up. But I go sit in my car because I was in the barracks and I don't want anybody to list up preacher. And then that radio station and blistered other guys teaching the word, and it was the word of God that started renewing my mind, making me go, whoa, just like you made that post.

You said, the more I read, the more I understand. And faith comes by hearing and hearing, by the word of God. So during this period of me, just like privately, quietly, you know, reading the Bible or listening, trying to figure this out, I get this letter from my real dad. It would have been a strange forever. And the times I'd seen him, he was just a nut job. I mean, he was a practicing warlock. Then he tried Japanese perfect liberty religion and then Shinto and he was a seeker.

But he was a bouncer too, and then he taught karate judo and juditsu. And I was a stop man, what an odd bird. And I remember visiting with him one time as a teenager, and I went to work with him. It was a big country bar. And he was like in the movie Road House, the cooler that's who my dad was. So he was older, he was experienced and he would train younger bounces. And I don't forget I was in there. This was like

me trying to like getting to know my biological dad because you're like, I'm gonna see like and I've got a group of guys coming in as big country club bar cowboys and they walk in the cow. Somebody points in our direction. They come over. My dad's sitting on a bar still. This guy walks up the leader of the bunch, what's with the medallic?, see the bouncer? Because I consider myself a public relations officer. And man, how can I help you? He goes, well, me and my buddies are gonna have a good time. They have a damn thing you're gonna do about it. And if you think you are,

you might as well test this out right now. I'm standing back going, oh, here we go. And I, funny thing my dad never got off the bar still. He just thumped the guy right in his forehead. Just pop. And it caught the guy off guard. He backs up. He's like stumbling. He tries to catch himself. His foot hits a chair. And then he trips in his head. It's a corner of of a table and he's not completely out. He's on the ground hats, but he's like, my dad never got off the bar so whenever I was like, what the heck was that?

And my dad said, hey, you ladies to his friends. Now he says, gentlemen, get your little lady friend out of here. They picked him up and went out. We're driving back. This is like one of my few times ever. I was like, what was that? How it feels? Was an accident?

Because I just was gonna aggravate them and you'd punch me and I just bound some off of it. He said, but it worked out really good. Oh, I get sure did. And he just loaded with stories like that. But here he is. Well, I'm going to he sends me a letter. And this letter, he says, dear son, and I was like, uh, don't call me son. You got my mom pregnant and you didn't even claim as your kid. You said, you know, I was some Pemps kid or whatever. And he goes, I know you, I know I've been a good dad.

And like, yeah, you're right. And he goes, I know, I've never been there for you. And then he goes, I know you think I'm crazy. I'm like, given that's our lineage, crazy, Bill. And he goes, this time I'm crazy. And I still have the letter, Sean, this time I'm crazy for Jesus Christ. And that didn't excite me.

That made me go, oh, great. What's the angle now? Jesus Christ. And he just goes, look, I'm just asking for a chance. And then the rest of the letter was pretty compelling. You see, Jen, don't censor it. And he goes, would you come visit me? Just when you have a leave of absence, come visit me.

I wanna make some things up to you. So I actually, I got in trouble in the Marine Corps. I have an unauthorized weapons and I'm the EQ and lie into the off-center and charge of the day. And he got cut from one of my sickles because he stuck his hands somewhere and had a weapon right there and he pulls it on his leg. You got nothing and I'm like, how did I get out there? So I get off his hours, I get, you know, I got to stand trial for my nonsense, but they

let me go visit my dad. And they go, you better come back. I said, I'm not going to eat while for this. I'll just take my lumps when I get back. I visit my dad and here's a guy, thick neck, huge forms, dad it up, his nose stays flat. He said, it broke so many times, even I started a bit of work. He said, hey, I'm glad you're here.

And son, I said, I just let's not do the sun bit right now. Let's just try to be men. He says, no, get good. And then, there's this time with him, he invited me to go to church. June 22, 1986. And he's like, hey he invited me to go to church. June 22, 1986. And he's like, hey, you want to go to church for me? I said, not really.

I said, I've had my share of church. He goes, I'm bringing some of the fellows. And the fellows were guys from his stable of fighters. And Larry and the eighties, and he had been doing the martial arts systems punch kick throw choke. So it was like MMA before his popular. And he was, well, a few of the guys are going. And I, they were knuckle-dragers. I was like, they're going, I said, oh, well, yeah, I'll go.

And I never forget the preacher's talking good stuff. And then the people start worshipping, like music. And they were raising their hands. They were like, all in to God. And in my mind, I'm like, whoa, I thought Christian people, I just didn't think tough men would do this. They're really, they're into it. Like they give flying squirrels psych if anybody's watching. They're just worshiping God. And I was like, and then I got to tell you, I had to do an honest assessment.

I was like, well, I had a Christian like them. That's where... And then I felt God's conviction. Just a simple conviction that kind of shown me the sin, the errors in my life I messed up. And yep, no, I'd never abuse the kid, never torture anybody, never did that. But if you look and compare your life against the 10 commandments, if you break any one of those, that's actually sin. You're missing the mark. So disobedient to parents, liar, adulterer, fornicator, putting anything above God, and that was the one that got me. That was the one that really got me. I was like, I know God, you're not the most important thing to me. And then I felt conviction. I was like, wow, that's him. And then he showed me the cross is wide. The cross is for

you. Your forgiveness. Anything you've done, anything you could do, that's why Jesus died on the cross. It is for you. And that's when I just, I turned my life to the Lord. And I was not a cryer. That mechanism that worked for ever. And I started, I call them man tears. I was like, oh my gosh. And I remember sitting and church grabbing a Bible pulling it up close to me because I didn't want to, I felt so embarrassed. I said, I don't want anybody to see me crying.

My tears, my tears are hitting the pages and crinkling them. And when the guy said, hey, if you need to get your business right with God, come forward. And I did, I actually literally just kind of ran forward, kneeled down. And man, I could feel God's love, like fill it. And I never felt his love. And I could feel the conviction of my sin.

It was happening at the same time. And I was like, ah, this shouldn't be happening. What I need to do, what I need to do for Penteham for my wrong. And I was like, God, say nothing. Jesus did it all. You just have to accept it. Was there ever a point in your life where you wondered where where he was or why he allowed all that to happen to you as a kid?

And that's on is probably one of the most important questions you could ask me because it was such a pivotal point after I came to faith that day, years later, it was with a counselor who simply asked me this, Victor, where was God? Where was the Lord? And you were gonna abuse and I said, hey, you should just shut up. He was, why is that offensive?

I said, look, God always does what's right. And he's probably helping us. He goes, but why was it there for you? And I remember it's, I had the same intensity and feeling of that movie Goodwill hunting when Robin was just talking to the guy about his abuse And he goes it's not your fault As I don't mess with me because it's you know it wasn't your fault He kept saying don't don't effing mess with me don't because what victims do Especially when you're younger, you build these messages in your mind to justify how and why, and it's false, because it's never your fault. And the guilt and the shame is never yours. It's the perpetrators.

And it was then that I was challenged to just ask the Lord where was he. Took me two years to do it. Because I had developed false hope and some people were going to understand this. It's not a real hope. It's a false hope. And I'd rather be false than ask the question and realize he wasn't there. Then my hope is it's gone. It took me two years. When I was in a place where I was

ready to ask him, it's just me. And I said, Lord, I need to know where were you. Because all of my little while you were helping kids in Africa. You were having kids who really needed help. I didn't really need, you know, I was done with that. I was just like, I just didn't understand where, where were you? What happened next was one of the most pivotal moments in my spiritual life of learning truth, replacing years of lies with the truth

over Jesus was. And when I asked him that, all of a sudden I was transported right back to my stepfather's room, and it was a particular instance where he was beat me with his belt. And I could see it, Sean. I could see the room. I could see the carpet, bathroom windows, closet, the bed. And then I see myself laying on the bed. Because my stepfather would make you get out of your pants and in your underwear, those are white, maybe he'd make you lay and stretch your arms out so your body, then he'd take his belt out,

wrap it a couple of times, and then he would start to beat you. And I see all this and I can feel the anxiety. I'm seeing it and I'm like, oh gosh, he has his beer on one hand, it's about another. I'm like, Lord, where? I guess you just weren't there and all of a sudden I literally see the Lord Jesus appear and he's right. He's right there next to my stepfather and then I mean mean instantly I start thinking, touch his heart, kill him. Make him die because I don't want to get beat.

If that would happen in my vision, it would have been fake because he never died like that. And then my next feeling was, oh my gosh, are you just going to watch him beat me? How impotent of a God is that? How sick! You're just going to stand and watch this man. Beat the hell out of me again. And then what happened next, it changed everything. He stepped in between me and my stepfather.

And he faced me. And then he kneeled down, and he put his body over mine right before I got hit. And he took every beating, foreign with me. He took it for and with me so that I could survive. And there's a scripture that says, the Lord will never leave you nor forsake you and he proved it. That's why I survived. I thought, that's a savior. I can follow I can follow and trust because his love is action. And never again that I doubt he wasn't there for me. And I'll tell you, it always breaks God's heart when somebody's being abused in any way.

But what I learned is, God doesn't cause that to happen. He gives the person a free will to do good or bad when this person does evil. He just allows the person a free will. And then in that redemptive, unbelievable, loving way, he enters that pain. And he understands the suffering and it breaks us hard, but he's enters it with us every kid. That's truth, my friend. That's the truth that sets us free. He really does love us.

Up to me, just right now. I don't know what to ask. It's... That is one of my most personal, private, spiritual moments that no one could ever change my mind on. It changed my life. And it was all based on that one question. And you asked it, it's the right question, or was he? He was right there with me.

And he's with everyone. Doesn't matter who they are, whether they follow him, whether not. Because it's humanity. And that's what the battle is. The battle is good and evil against the human. Victor, let's take a break. When we come back, I want to dig into what got you into saving children. I think it's pretty self-explanatory. But what I would like to talk about

the journey that led you into the nonprofit and all the stuff that you're doing within it right now. We'll do. Perfect. Thank you for listening to the Sean Ryan Show. If you haven't already, please take a minute, head over to iTunes and leave the Sean Ryan Show review. We read every review that comes through and we really appreciate the support. Thank you. Let's get back to the show.

All right, Victor. We're back from the break. We're getting ready to dig into your nonprofit. Yeah. But first, you've mentioned your wife a couple of times. Oh, yeah. How long have you guys been married? 35 years.

35 years. Yeah, this year. Congratulations. Thank you. That was a compliment, ever. That is amazing. So you and your wife founded, founded this together, correct? We did.

What is the key? What's the recipe for a successful marriage? One, marry the right person to learn to forgive a lot. And three, be intentional in growing your love. And I think a lot of, I think a lot, I mean, in essence, our human nature were all selfish and marriage proves that. And then children help accentuate that. You know, and I just think if people invest in our intentional and their marriage and learning to work beyond what they feel,

and I'll tell you a little secret, I'll never set this. Here's a little secret that I do over the years. When I just am not standing my wife, I'm like, see, I agree with you. I mate myself, think about what's true and good and what I love about her. And it's a mental discipline to go, okay, yeah, right now, eh. But what do I love about her? What? Not her current stat, but right. What kind of look, what? And I just don't think about all the good things,

all the good things. And guess what it changes your mind. And then, you know, it's easy to forgive when you know you've been forgiven too. Thank you for sharing that. Thank you for sharing that. Thank you for sharing that. There's a lot of broken homes out there and I think there's more to force

than successful marriages at this point in time. And so, you know, that's important advice. When we have an online course, people can go to victimarts.com, for slash marriage. It's an online course of thousands of people go through and it helps. It's literally like just sitting out with me

and my wife and I lived with them. And we share ups and downs and struggles, but we share nuggets and insights that people can apply instantly. I'll bet you get a lot more people coming to check that out here. Good. Good. So, but let's move into the All Things Possible Foundation. Yep.

Let's just start at the beginning. What was the... I mean, it sounds like you guys do a lot of things. Yep. I don't... Is the marriage stuff through the foundation as well? It is, but we didn't start doing that till later. So let's talk about the, just the, the birth of the concept, the idea.

How did that come about? Well, it, it was, I'll tell you, Sean, because it's actually interesting and funny and unexpected. I got invited to speak. In our background was martial arts and fitness. We lived in Hawaii for years, raised our kids there. And at one point, had the largest facility martial arts school. I mean, it was interesting. V Torbal for his first fight outside of

Brazil was in Hawaii and he came to our training center, him and his instructor before he passed away and his mom. And he trained and worked out. But it's, we got to place to where we felt called to ministry. I tried being a pastor and it didn't work out. I was an assistant pastor or tried to be a senior pastor, but where I mean when I realized, oh gosh, is... Why didn't it work out? You seem like the perfect fit. You come from a line of trauma. You've overcome so much. I think a lot more people could relate to a man like you than the squeaky clean pastor who's never had a challenge in his life. You know what I mean?

There's, I'm just gonna be honest. That's something that really drove me away from God, Christianity, Jesus, whatever you wanna call it, is the picture, the picture, perfect snapshot Christian. You know, extremely judgmental. Yep. Most of them haven't been through any sort of trauma. Never deployed overseas, no childhood, like everything.

I think a lot of them have just been handed everything. And then they become super judgemental, and they judge everybody who's going through some type of a hardship, because they don't deal with it the way that that they think that That person should be dealing with you know, and it's I find it to be extremely hypocritical Zero self-reflection. It's all about them. It's not even about it's not even about Christ. It's not even about God. It's what makes me look good in front of my people and church. And that drove me away for a long time and it kept me away. Even when I would start to, you know, there have been times where I would start to want to find faith.

And then I would go, that's what I saw. And then I'd walk right back out the door. Well, I think Western Christianity, many years ago, got off course. And it became a machine and it lost the heart of real ministry and that's to help people not to become, I mean, literally pastors are just like anybody else. And especially when you start building and growing, it became a business and enterprise. And they judged their outcomes were flawed based on well, how many people do I have? How much money are we bringing in?

That's where they're, I think they get off course is like, so are you not successful? If you have 40 people, and it's a country church, or if you're faithfully managing to 100, and you go visit people from the hospital, you marry people, you're barring people, that's, I mean, standardly, that's how been, that's Christianity has been. We got into this, I think, Western mindset, where, well, this is what it looks like, and then everybody's looking at other pastors and other churches and

My wife and I went to all right. Well, she was at a pastor's conference event I mean this was like gosh 25 30 years ago 30 years ago and and I know she and her forget she came home disgusted I was like baby. what's going on? She goes, honey, what's this thing? And it's supposed to be older Christian pastors, wives, ministering to younger. And she goes, they had a coding system

by what color name badge you wore. If you were a senior pastor's wife or an assistant, and it was clickish. They actually treated women different. And she goes she was like, are you kidding me? So the reason why you know, and maybe I'm a better fit now, but back then, now, but back then, a defining moment was on staff at a church. It was a Calvary Chapel, which were popular churches, and some pastors were amazing. I mean, I got a friend who came hear and tell us amazing. They're doing it the right way, right?

And then I've got, he's in Chattanooga. And then I've got other guys I know him like that he should be out of the ministry. This is a vocation. And you're using this whole platform and it's about you. So why I step back many, many years ago from that forward facing church type atmospheres, they wanted me to counsel somebody.

And I wasn't even married yet, didn't have counseling training. And they're like, well, you just, you know, so I'd try to counsel a few people. And then I got a phone call. And it was a guy that came in. His, his older daughter was in my little youth group. And he came in and he goes, man, I just got an argument with my wife and since I blew it, Victor, I messed up. I said, like what?

It goes, I cheated on her. I'm like, oh, that's a big one. I was one of the big ones right there because could you please just help me get back with her? He says, I'm repentive and I'll never do it again. I'm like, I'll talk to her. You know, that's a heavy order right there, because it's biblical. If someone commits adultery, you have a biblical precedent to divorce them.

So I talked her and she's like, you know, he's doing drugs and I said, what's up to you? So she opted to forgive him and be reconciled. So she went back in a few months later, he did it again. And he came in, he was like, Oh my gosh, please, I'm taking a little longer. I was like, do you want to taste? So you know, some women, they're messed up with this function too and they allow stuff to happen in generational trauma, generational trauma. And so she learned it back in. It was a few months later, I get a phone call from her. She says, Victor, Victor, I need your help. his picture, Victor, I need your help. So what's going on? She goes, you know, my husband, she did again,

but he's high on, I think he was smoking crack and she goes, he just freaked out when I confronted him about it and he hit our daughter, their toddler. He, he punched her into a wall full of just, wow, and he goes, she says, you know, bust of the wall, he said, what do I do? I said, call an ambulance and call the police right away.

She goes, okay, I'm just telling you in case he comes to her time, like, that idiot wouldn't come to church at this point. Guess who comes walking in? This dude comes walking in. This was a defining moment of why I wasn't church material at the time. He sees me and then he keeps walking.

He's gonna find another pastor. I do an intercept and said, Hey, man, what's going on? He goes, oh, you know, things aren't great. And I said, well, once you come back to my office, so we walked and I had, there were many pastors offices. I was at the end, because it was a big church.

And when we walked in my office, I put him behind my desk and I sat at the door and I said, then what's going on? Oh, man, it's just, you know, I said, I'm not going to call for your wife. Because you did. I said, yeah, you really have messed up at you. And he was definitely tweaking. He was just, and I said, she said you hit your daughter, your toddler, Boundstra for all. Because I don't know what happened, man. I just lost my mind and then he goes And he's like fake crime. Oh, I got

He goes I don't any set these words he goes I don't know it's wrong with me. Maybe I should get hit I thought I don't have a lot of skill sets. I'm fresh out the Marine Corps, but I'm comfortable and conflict. That's what I'm thinking. So I go, yeah, I think you should. So I got up and went over there. He said, what are you doing? I said, you just asked for it.

You're gonna get it, swap them, put them on the ground, start pounding us, do. And he's screaming. I mean, he is screaming. The door flies open. And it's the, you know, number two pastors. And he's like, what are you doing? Stop. I'm like, he, it's okay. He said he should be hit. So it's like legal. And he had his taller and the guys like picture, please come out come out the guys they call the police and The guys like you can't hit people when they come out. He just needs his butt. What? And then the police need to come arrest him. See he's a complete punk

And it was pretty soon after that. I was asked to find a different approach to ministry outside of the church walls. I said, okay, I said, I get it. And then, you know, God let us on a whole journey where our ministry became us teaching and reaching out to the public through martial arts, big schools, and people were coming to faith, and we had devotions after every class. I think it would be 60 people. We're having a vocation, we're praying, having a little every class. And people started calling me their weekday pastor. They go, you've really become like, we apply this stuff because you'll just talk no

more and I'm like, well, we're just just trying to walk in our lane or running it. But then when it came time, a defining moment that said, I was 40 and down the road, business and life. Yeah, it's just for 40 and it ended up being I was asked to go to a youth prison and share my testimony. And I had worked for Dr. Dobson and somebody had heard me share a little bit. And I'm like, would you come to see the prison? I was like, why do I need to go? They said, your story could really help them. So I prayed about it. I said, yeah. And I said, who's gonna be there? They said it's 75 kids locked up. It's a full high security facility, guards in the dark. I'm like, yeah, man. I start getting a little nervous.

I'm like, I don't know what to say. And he goes, why don't you do a little martial arts demonstration? You're, I can do that. So we go, they bring these kids in this gym. They're all sitting there looking at me. And they really are going, what in the world are you going to talk to us about? And so I decided to do a little demonstration

with a pair of new chucks and have a guy hold pencils in his hands and one in his mouth. And I was nursing a shoulder injury, so I probably shouldn't have done it. But I knocked the pencils out of his hand when I went for his mouth, I missed, and I split his chin open. And this is what's crazy.

His, all those kids were looking at me like this, and when I hit that guy and split him, he starts bleeding. They were all like this. This guy, he's playing around playing around, his preacher, he's a preacher. Who, what is, and then I had their attention because they're like, this is weird and he's violent. But they can relate to it.

And then I do a hit where I can hit a person, you know, eight points of contact and a little over a second. And of course, the gun to zone. I had all their attention and I shared my story. 56 of the 75 gave their life to Christ that day. And it was so odd. And I couldn't believe it. So many responded, I told him, sit down. I could ask again, do you understand this? Coming to faith in Christ, you get forgiven, but you're surrendering and you're being tensed about following him.

If that's you stand up 50, I think it was 56 stood up. I was just like, the warden comes over too many goes, I've been praying that someone would be able to touch these kids. He says it's you. And I remember being stunned. And there was some idea to follow up weekly with these kids. So they would grow on their faith. That's who it invited me in.

But I end up going home and going, researching. I'm going to youth presence over there in the US. I even know and it just oh my gosh it was unbelievable. And back then on any given night there was 175 to 200,000 kids were locked up or under some type of you know legal thing and I'm like, who's reaching them? And I looked and I was like, whoa, nobody's reaching them. Very tiny percent because of the Western church, they're the misfits.

There's no benefit to trying to win them for Christ outside of maybe crime reduction. They can't do anything for the church. They're a hard group. I said, well that's perfect because I like going after those who others won't. And that's when I took my wife, I think I think we're supposed to reach these kids. She's like, then let's do it. And we did. We were celebrating 20 years this year. Man. That's how it started.

That's awesome. But it grew. Yeah, it did. Oh my gosh, did it grew. I mean, you guys are saving kids all over the world now. Next on Sean Ryan Show. How did it come from being a ministry for kids in prison to go and overseas?

Man, I rack, Syria, wherever you go. Over a hundred missions, complete. Would trauma care help over 45,000 women and children? Wow. Yeah. And right into ISIS confinement camps. What kind of stuff has happened in these kids? Everything from their hiding with their parents

and their parents are murdered, to they've been abducted. ISIS, bad things happen.