Sherlock & Co. - 39 - Shoscombe Old Place - Part One

Episode Date: June 25, 2024

GONE GIRL - Sherlock and I had decided to have a bit of a holiday... when I say holiday- I mean just outside Swindon. What was planned to be a trip where we escaped mystery and crime-solving for a few days turned into... well.. mystery and crime-solving. For merchandise and transcripts go to: www.sherlockandco.co.uk For ad-free, early access to adventures in full go to www.patreon.com/sherlockandco Follow me @DocJWatsonMD on twitter, or sherlockandcopod on TikTok and instagram.  To get in touch via email: [e-mail] Listener discretion is advised. This podcast is property of Goalhanger Podcasts. Copyright 2024. SHERLOCK AND CO. Based on the works of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle Paul Waggott as Dr. John Watson Harry Attwell as Sherlock Holmes Leigh McDonald as Carol Watson  Joel Emery as Joe Mason Additional voices Miranda Langley Adam Jarrell Written by Joel Emery Directed by Adam Jarrell Editing and Sound Design by Holy Smokes Audio Produced by Neil Fearn and Jon Gill Executive Producer Tony Pastor Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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So if that's offensive to you then you better switch off. Sorry, nothing I can do about it. You'll see why. Also, this episode is, well, this adventure is three parts. Again, if that offends you, nothing I can do about that. But I will remind you that this is independent, free media, so stop your whinging about multiple parts, otherwise in ten years time you'll be paying 20 quid a month to some tech bro who solved all your problems. Sorry, this is just a rant, not an intro at all. Right, there's a bit of swearing in this episode, a bit of fruity slash saucy language at times too, nothing too bad. Alright then, bye!

Oh, get a load of that Archie boy! That is... what is that again? That is an organic liver sausage. Thought? Well, that's very flattering, but I didn't make it, you know, it came like that in the shop. Yeah, that's it. Lick your drool off the floor. Lovely stuff. Good thing about you Archie, mate, is that you're basically a portable bin. You're like one of those vacuum cleaners,

you know, little robot vacuums. Speaking of, I need to clean before we go, don't I matey mate? Will this conversation be going on any longer? Sorry? The dialogue between you and Archie, will it be continuing for much longer or is the conversation coming to an end?

Yeah, what's the problem? I'm trying to focus. On what? Your drug-induced coma? Well, no, actually. I'm amusing myself with this newspaper column. The agony aunt. People write in with their woes and failings in life.

The demise of their circumstances, the struggles of their relationships, the collapse of their livelihoods. Sounds very similar to our show, to be honest mate. It's rather very good. Do you want to give it a read? Er, sounds lovely, but no, I'm alright, thanks. Why not? This is what people amuse themselves with. There's a woman here who found her husband interfering with a man named Henry Hoover. Rather scandalous to give the gentleman's name away I thought, but...

No, sorry. No, I think... I think she means he was interfering with a Henry Hoover. A what? It's a brand of vacuum cleaner. Mmm. Good God. Yep. And you've showed your hand there too. My hand. You've never vacuumed the flat because we have a Henry Hoover and on that note I'm going to do a proper clean.

Then are we good to go? I haven't packed. Ah, for God's sake. Well, can you pack? Please, I will clean. Certainly Watson, apologies. Right, Dettol, Cloths, Cloths, Cloths, Cloths, and Hoover. Oh, Henry.

Oh, I just can't look at you the same now, mate. I'm sorry. Yeah, no, you're going on eBay. My name is Dr John Watson. Once of the British Army Northumberland Fusilier Regiment, now a true crime podcaster based in central London. the as I document the adventures of Sherlock Holmes. Hello everybody, forgive me for this one. I mean, to be fair, you've had an episode every week since I started this thing, but it's holiday time.

Mariana is off to sunny Spain for some father's day, well, belated father's day time with her dad. And so Sherlock and I were trying to think how we could have a little glamorous holiday. Hollybobs, as people that drive Fiat 500s and drink rosé say. You say Hollybobs? Yeah, but only ironically. Mm-hmm. How convenient for you. What are you doing?

Using a microscope. On a bus? Mm-hmm. It's attached to your phone. It's digital. Oh. Oh, that's impressive. What are you looking at? Blue. Okay, why? For a friend.

Are we going to elaborate any further than that? A friend the Met. They found a knife in the St Pancras case. Well, fragments of what they thought could be a knife. See in there, look. They've only given you that tiny piece? Not many pieces to go round. It's burned and charred. Look. Quite... ...bobbly.

Yes. Remnants of a grip. Where's the glue? Everything to do with the crime was incinerated. Including the knife. But, you can see how these small blotches on the grip burned first and fiercest. Yeah. That's because it's

more flammable and more toxic than the rest of it so it was imprinted on the handle. What is toxic and flammable when burnt? Glue? Exactly. Apoxie if we're being as exact as possible. There are glycidal residues one of a number of things produced by the reaction of a cyclic alkene with a parasite. Cycloaliphatic exposides. Goodness, I feel sick. Yeah, yeah, maybe don't peer into a digital microscope while on a long coach journey. Good idea. So why does the glue matter?

Because the key suspect is a repair technician. He works mostly with metals and plastic. Epoxy resins are the ideal glue for working with both. Fascinating. Do you wish to continue with your apology to the listeners? Yes, yeah, yeah. Where was I? Hollybobs. Yes, thanks. So Sherlock and I and this guy, that's Archie in case you didn't hear that, are having a little break ourselves. I would have wanted somewhere abroad to be honest, but we can't leave Mr. Dog, so we're off to Swindon. Yeah, woo!

Now just to clarify, it's actually just outside Swindon near Wotton Bassett, Royal Wotton Bassett, excuse me. near Wotton Bassett, Royal Wotton Bassett, excuse me. Carol Watson is away on an actual holiday and she's kindly handed over Casa de Watson for me and Sherlock and Archie to kick back, chill out, become irritated in one another's presence, miss the amenities we used to, get bored and come home. You never know, we might enjoy it as well. We're currently on a rail replacement bus, for those of you uninitiated in British rail travel it's quite crap every now and then we've been here there and everywhere haven't we hey this morning No, that's just an expression. We've had a bit of a convoluted route is all I'm yeah

So yeah rail replacement situation So this bus is doing its best impression of a train right now and driving us down the M4 to Swindon bus station and of a train right now and driving us down the M4 to Swindon bus station. And Swindon is a pleasant town, is it? You seem rather fond of it. Yeah it is, it's pleasant, yeah. A bit run down in places, but otherwise it's very nice. I just wasn't expecting the man at the bus shelter to urinate on people's luggage. Yeah, no, that was a bit unexpected. But hey, he ran out of steam before he got two hours, didn't he? So, here we are, mate.

What do you think? This is where John Watson's are born and made. Well, born in Tockinham, made in the army. Well, made and then broken in the army, then subsequently fixed at 221B Baker Street. You were born in this village? Yep, in that very house there. Who delivered the baby? Mum's a midwife, mate, she's got a connection. But more importantly, this spot right here is where I snogged Stacey Marsh and she let me, you know... I don't know. You know. Why

are you raising your eyebrows like that? Come on. Stop nudging me with your elbow. What are you talking about? Right, well, let's just say... she didn't just get a double D in maths and French. You really are awful. She taught me a bit of French as well. You can't wink, so stop trying. And how would she teach you French if she got a D? And you don't need to record these vulgarities.

There's no episode. Hey, you see that bus shelter down there by the way? Mm-hmm. That is where Lee Pearce ate a backpack. What do you mean he ate a backpack? In tiny chunks. Took him seven hours. He's regional manager at Tesco now. In charge of seven stores. You are an idiot.

That's what happened, mate. Uh, kitchen slash lounge. And there's two bedrooms upstairs, but she's also turned that room there which was a dining room the most obviously useless room in the world she's turned that into a little bedroom I'll be in my old room so you can either sleep in my mum's room yuck or you can sleep in the little room her room is nice everything but the door bangs in the breeze at night and she has a clock in there. Little downstairs room it is. Lovely. Er, right, so I was thinking we unpack,

have a cup of tea on this nice sunny day out in the garden and head down to the mallard. What's the mallard? Pub. Understood. Oh and mum left me a voice note the other day that said something about what she wanted doing with the bins. Er, here.

Eighteen minutes? Hmm? The voice note she left. 18 minutes. Yeah, I know. She waffles incessantly. She just goes on and on and on. And I say it to her all the time.

I'm like, mum, you just keep talking. But she doesn't listen, does she? Because she just talks in circles. She never gets around to making any concise point, you know? They're bouncing around from point to point to point. And then before you know it, she's gone from that bloke down the road to this place that didn't get planning permission, that thing she saw on the TV. Why down the road to this place that didn't get planning permission,

that thing she saw on the TV. Why are you looking at me like that? No reason. Right. Hey, let's try and find the bit where she mentioned bins. She locks them sometimes. I can pick locks, Watson. I'd much rather that than 18 minutes of a voice note.

Hello, lovely. Scorcher today, is this a scorcher? Don't you hate that when you've got a holiday planned and the weather turns just before you go? Let me skip forward 15 seconds. Sunglasses that don't have UV protection. So I said Charlie, I can't... Nope. But it used to be the old schoolhouse, you know, the one...

No. They've had her done, but she's had 14 puppies, John. Can you... No. He said he was after my vote, and I said... Alright, here we go. The pretty lesbian girl with the... Sake mother.

He's from Somalia. Like the fella that runs... what's his name? Mo Salah. Farah. Mo Farah. Thank God I'm not putting any of this up. Small boat. Pension tax. Ari and Meg. Oh. It's gone quiet on the... It's communism. Bonnex.

180 pounds for a big shop. Ah, nearly there. Hold on the... It's communism! Bollocks. 180 pounds for a big shop! Er, nearly there, hold on. Mm-hmm. Charlie whipped out his... Er... Pinot. The size of it, John. I was sloshed before you know it.

Okay, no, now we're definitely nearly there. He thinks she's gone missing. Such a scandal, honestly, he's broke. Wait, stop. What? What's this? And Joe Mason was the one that told me all about it, because old lardy-darl Robert Myfartsdon'tstink,

old Bobby Knobhead. Right, can I skip ahead? Who's Bobby Knobhead? No, it's erm... I'll explain it in a minute. Anyway, no-one has seen Beatrice in, we're talking months, John, months and months, and he keeps saying she's off in Saint-Tropez. Joe made a good point, he said, when has Beatrice ever missed the Shoscombe festival at Shoscombe old place?

She runs the bloody thing very mysterious One for lovely Sherlock, maybe who knows? Anyway, what was I saying? Bins woman bins Oh, that's it. Joe. Joe's gonna sort the bins. You don't need to worry Great through that for nothing. Who is this Beatrice? Really, it's just local nonsense mate, honestly.

Why is she missing? No, so Bobby Nob- I mean Robert Norbertson lives in Shoscombe Old Place with his sister Beatrice. He thinks he's some fancy bloke now because his sister married Rich. And yeah, that's Beatrice. She's very old. She was married to... what's his face? What's his face? Sir James Falder. And he's Gentry, is he? Oh yeah, Gentry, but big, big, well-known racing driver, you know, in the 30s or maybe the 50s. I don't

know, anyway, he died a while ago, I was still living here when he did. But, um, anyway, the Falders own Shoscombe Motors. The cars? The cars, yeah. Well, you were wrong on both your guesses. Yeah, alright, 1948. He raced throughout the 50s. This is, what's this one? Swedish Grand Prix.

And there he is there, look. A Shoscombe Spaniel. Shoscombe Spaniel. That's why the green in Shoscombe is called Spaniel Green. A lot of people think that the Prince Pub over the New Shoscombe is named after the Prince of Wales, but it's actually named after the Shoscombe Prince,

which is a card that, um, look at this, find the name cheap. Uh, here, here. Who's this fella?'s James Bond right? And who's that woman in the bikini? I don't say her name because this is a family show I thought we weren't releasing any episode look look what car he gets into That is a Shoscombe.

That is a Shoscombe Prince. Look at it, mate. Beautiful. Stunning. I mean, it's like some... It looks like it's almost been pulled out of the earth, like it's been formed into that shape over thousands of years or something. Just... They don't make cars like that anymore. I mean literally they don't make that car anymore.

So what became of the Foulders? Well Sir James married Beatrice, I don't know where, she's always been around in the area, and her brother Bobby Nobherr, Robert Norbertson, he's car mad so when James died he moved himself in. To Shoscombe Old Place? Yeah yeah but you know like I say he's not a big posho or anything he's just a local guy who now prances around in red trousers but he went to my crappy school, years before me obviously. He looks after Beatrice I think mum says but everyone knows he's just in it for the cars and the festival which Which we can go to, if you want to go.

To Shoscombe Festival? Yeah, it's good stuff, good stuff. You know, it's big manor grounds, camping, fishing, food trucks, live bands, beer tent, loads of games. I won a penalty shootout competition there when I was ten, got a football sign by nearly the whole Swindon squad. And that was a prize, was it? Shut up. So, thoughts a prize, was it? Shut up. So, thoughts? So, she's missing. Yeah?

I mean, this is Carol Watson we're talking about. Take all that with a pinch of salt and half a bottle of Chardonnay. Who alerted her to the disappearance of Beatrice? She mentioned the news coming from Joe. Yeah, Joe. Joe Mason. He's a neighbour. How do you know that?

He's tending to Carol's bins. Right, yeah. Yeah. Fancy's mum. Always has. I think we may need to speak to him. Why's that? Because, Watson, I believe the game may very well be a foot. When your celebration of life is prepaid in advance, it becomes a gift from you to

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Why does he have porcelain octopuses in his garden? Because he's weird. Just not remotely their habitat. Octopus's garden. A lot of people think that just Ringo wrote Octopus's garden, but George Harrison worked on it with him. It's probably because John and Paul dismissed not only Ringo's tracks, but George's and all. Sorry, what?

Hey, Joe. John bloody hell, hello. Oh, big hug. Yeah, oh. How are you doing? Oh, your mum says you got beat up in Ukraine. Blown up. I got blown up in Ukraine.

No. Yeah. Same thing happened to Pete West. You're kidding me. Nope. You know who once those bouncy castle hires up in Avkot? Yeah. Well Charlie Martin's lad, big fat kid he is,

he jumped on his Godzilla one, the big inflatable, well, Godzilla with the tail and all that. Yeah. It caused a rupture in the fabric, right? Bang. Blew up in his face. Went to Great Western Hospital with a broke nose. All blood on his face and that.

I mean, you know what it's like. Yeah, yeah. Hiya, I'm Joe. Yeah, sorry, God, sorry Joe. This is Sherlock Holmes, Sherlock Holmes, this is Joe Mason. Good to meet you Joe. Where's Gary Liddicker then, eh? Who? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Yeah, no, Goalhanger. Yeah, he's not with us today. Just work for him. This one dragged you down to Wiltshire then, has he? Indeed. A few issues with the trains, so we've been here, there and everywhere.

Here, there and everywhere. Revolver album. 1966. Yep. Mind if we come in? Mind it? I'd love it. Of course, yeah. Come on in. When did your mum head off on her holidays? Yesterday. Yesterday. Ugh. Oh, my trouble seems so far away. in when did your mom head off in her holidays yesterday yesterday oh my

trouble seems so far away who are these gentlemen just stop touching stuff it's like some sort of shrine stop we need to make this brief look at the details get out hello goodbye say goodbye and I'll say hello, hello hello. Listen, Joe. Magical Mystery Tour 1967. John didn't actually like that song, he preferred I Am The Walrus. Wanted that to be the A-side. You did what, John? It's different, John.

Hey Joe, we wanted to ask you actually a few questions about Shuscombe Old Place. Oh, yep. You still work there, don't you? Yes, mate. Only had a day off in past three weeks. Can you believe that? Festival kicks off tomorrow, doesn't it? Yeah, of course.

Of course. We're actually thinking of going along. You got it. Yeah, I'll get you free tickets. Oh, lovely. Just ask as you come in. I'll put your name on a thing. Oh, great.

And they'll just let us in? Of course, mate. If they don't, you'll have to pay the old 50 quid on entry. Rip off that, innit? Blimey. Well, don't let me down. Don't let me down. B-Site, get back, recorded same day in fact,

20th of January, 1969. Joe, mum was saying that Beatrice Folder hasn't been seen in some time, is that right? Yeah, and all we hear from her comes from Bobby Nobed. Sorry, just, we might be, you know, we're in the true crime documentary game and we might be recording this particular case. So if we could just call him by his actual...

Oh, course, yeah. Just young people listening to the show and everything, and you know, Robert himself might eventually hear it. No, no, of course, of course, of course. No, no, no, I get it. Robert Norbertson, I should be saying, not Bobby Norbert. Uh, Birtas's brother that is, obviously. I mean, you know that, don't you? Yeah, he tells us, doesn't he, that she's gone off to Saint-Tropez. I thought, yeah, I don't blame your love really, miserable weather, the rain and all that. Awful, yeah.

Very rainy. Yes. So she swans off, doesn't she? She's got the money obviously, why not? But then May comes around and we're still asking about her. Right? Because she ain't well, John, she ain't been well for a- She wasn't well even when I was still here. Yeah, exactly. I mean bloody ages ago anyway.

Bobby Nobbit, excuse me, Robert Norbertson, he says, Oh no, she's staying out there a bit longer now, right? So I spoke to Jill Pring, who works with Kev Dunn at the Green Dragon. And you know BFG runs it? Yeah. Who's BFG? Big Fat George runs the Green Dragon. That's not very kind.

Oh, he's ever so thin now, John. You want to see him. He got a tapeworm back in 2019. Looks incredible. Anyway, he's got Beatrice's dog now. Why? He told Jill, who told Kev, who told me, that Robert Norbertson gave it away. He gave Beatrice's dog away to this man?

Yeah, correct. Did she have any animosity towards the creature? They were inseparable. She loved that dog, loved it. I ate it personally. Winey little twat was Jasper, but she fought the world over. Winey, you say? Interesting. Continue with Beatrice Falder's Saint-Rapé excursion. Course, yeah. She's off selling herself, and she don't come back. And we're proper close to Shoscombe Festival now, aren't we?

All on our manor grounds and she loves it as well, don't she John? Yeah, she was always around. Always around in what sense? Well when we go as kids and teenagers she was... she kind of ran the thing, didn't she? Just a bloody bit John, they truffle the cars and that wouldn't they? You'd have all these people coming just for the cars alone. From all over as well. Yeah, all over Wiltshire and Summerbatchire.

Yeah, but all over the world. Oh, loads of foreigners, loads of them, American, Saudi. What's the other loaded ones? Er, Dubai? No, other one, er, World Cup. Qatar. Qataris, they love it. Have the Falder family considered selling the cars?

Them cars. Oof, big decision. Why? Them cars, mate, right? You've got 12 Shoscom Spaniels left in the world. Picture that, right? 12 of them. Guess how many we've got? 8. We've got 8 of them. The Shoscom Prince of Boncar, right? There's 2 of them in the world. One of them in California. One here.

People go mad for those things, mate. They go absolutely potty. They must be worth millions. Millions and millions, mate. But Beardress loves them as well as James did. And bloody Robert, he's been a petrolhead since he were little and his dad used to work on the trains, he loved all that. Amazing cars, amazing history. Oh amazing, obviously mate, but your mate here's right. They love them, but apparently now they're flogging them. What? Auction on the final day of the festival, gonna be on ITV, they've got a big gold London fella with the hammer. What's it, the auctioneer asset?

It's a whole thing, John. She's selling the cars? Well you say she, where the heck is she, John? You know, it don't add up. She'd drive for a Shostcombe Spaniel every day, wouldn't she? Across Buckton Lane. Buckton Lane, Buckton Lane. What one's that? The one that goes through her grounds.

Oh, the long and winding road. Long and winding road. Beatles last number one hit in the US. Joe. But you know it's a funny thing right because before she left she dried the spaniel but it's like I don't know it's it's like she'd never done it before John right she's cranking through the gears and spluttering along like no one's business. Weird. Did anyone manage to speak to her at that time? No, she wouldn't stop for anybody. This was a thing. If anyone got close she'd speed away in the car, especially bloody Kurt. Do you know of any way we could contact Beatrice?

She's an 86 year old woman in Saint-Tropez John. I ain't got a Scooby, mate. And she doesn't have a phone? She might, but who's got her number, you know? I ain't got a Scooby, mate. And she doesn't have a phone? She might, but who's got her number, you know? I ain't. You could call Carrie. Carrie? Phone box there. Actually it's a defibrillator now. Then you've got the church there. Not real church bells, just a speaker in the spire that bongs out every hour. What else? Big war memorials, very army, RAF kind of area. Hence Royal Wotton Bassett. I've got a royal status because they do the tributes

and funeral processions, repatriations for the deceased in Afghanistan and Iraq. I managed to not be paraded through these streets myself. So, yep. And there's a bench. Excellent bench. Yeah, it's a good one. I'll carve my name in it somewhere. Under this bit here, there it is. J Watts. Watts. J Watts. Well I can't put my full name can I? I'll get caught. I really hope that with the clues of a teenager living opposite the bench who goes by the name J Watson you'd be caught. Yeah. Yeah. You don't realise a place is run down when you live in it, do you? Then when you take someone else here.

We can avoid meeting her, if you wish. What? Carrie. We have plenty of other cards in our hand. We don't need to play this one, not until it's required anyway. Er, what are you talking about? Oh, nothing. Just, I'd rather peer down other avenues. Oh, Carrie's Beatrice's carer. Sherlock, she could give us some information. Yes, but at what cost?

Oh, no. Sorry, Watson. What have you deduced? Oh, just a little thing. How? Your tattoo removal is rather shoddy. I know you think it looks like Roman numeral is covering up the original name, but on close inspection... Oh, and you've done close inspection, have you?

Once or twice. Sake. Like I say, we have other cards in our hand. I've come a long way, okay? It's only 90 miles to London. No, emotionally, emotionally I've come a long way. I'm sure Carrie has as well. You don't have to put off questioning her because of some stupid history. I can face it, I can hack it.

I'm a big boy, okay? Would you like me to call? Oh yeah, please. Could I see her number? 7-5-4-1-6-6-2-3-2-1-1 See? You can store numbers in your head as well. Would you like me to call? Er, yeah, please. Could I see her number? 075416623211 See? You can store numbers in your head as well. Yeah, a little bit too much carry stored up there to be honest. Hmm, it's quite unlikely she will answer a number she doesn't recognise.

Shit, yeah. Erm, hang up, use my phone. Okie dokie. What's wrong? Nothing. Just... probably poor signal in this village. I'll try... I'm blocked, aren't I? Yes you are. Yes. Great. Great. Yeah John Watson should be two tickets. Joe Mason sorted us out? Yes, here you go John, you're in the glamping pods.

Oh, hello, glamping. Lovely, thank you. Enjoy yourself chaps. Hear that Archie boy? Glamping. Glamping. Glamping, glamorous camping, so probably some sort of yurt or teepee. Wow, this brings back a lot of memories. It's quite beautiful. Yeah, it's quite the property. Indeed.

Smoke? No, you can smoke later. No, the chimneys of the house. Smoke? Oh yeah, and here's me, lathered in sun cream. Mmm. Amazing house, isn't it? And the fields and forests. Oh, come this way, come see this.

We'll camp a bit further up there but um yeah do you recognise this guy? The river. Yep, oh steady Archie. The Thames. Ah yes, yeah there he is, the River Thames. Quite small over this way, not the uh, not the guy we recognise from London. A lot cleaner than the London part of him anyway. Remarkable thing. Yeah. To see this trickle through the countryside, knowing what he'll eventually become. Mmm. knowing what he'll eventually become. Hmm.

Journey, growth, and finally lost to much deeper, complex waters unrecognisable in the homogeneity. Or swallowed by a bulldog. Or that, of course. Come on, let's find the glamping things on the river according to this. Come on let's find the glamping thing that's on the river according to this. Come on boy. Hello there, thanks for joining us both at Shoscombe Festival. Can you hear that in the background? A little folk band up on the stage in the distance. That's towards the house.

So we're in the Shoscombe Valley. Not particularly steep for a valley. Very lush. Green rolling hills getting their last bit of sunshine as it sets just behind me in the west. Got some woodland about it sets just behind me in the west. Got some woodland about, what, maybe 300 yards to my right. To my left I can make out the master detective and his fishing rod. I think it's safe to say we are finally making a bit of a holiday out of this. Got a beer on the go from the Big Boo's tent, a local one, very nice. Apparently what makes it glamping is not a fancy structure or anything, it's just a standard tent but they give us glampers a little stone barbecue so I'm tending to that now

with a fish we caught on it. That's a lie, it's sausages, haven't caught any fish. An archie is right here next to me because let's face it I'm in charge of the pork that is sizzling away in front of him. charge of the pork that is sizzling away in front of him. Oh it is bloody lovely there is no other way to put it. Bliss. Cheers. Ah what is it? There's someone outside the tent. What? Now, go, go!

Who is this? Someone pissed up me. They're running to the woods. Shit. This way. Archie! Archie! I, ah, god.

Oh, I see them, I see them. Come back here! Phone light, phone light, bloody hell. Watson, shine it into the forest. Into the forest! Yeah, I know, I know. Shit, where have they gone? They're hiding.

I think it's best you come out and explain what you wanted with our belongings. Hello? I mean, we're not gonna have a go we're just here to investigate a few things that's all hello oh shit Archie's gone Archie Archie he's with her Archie he ran to his owner you're talking about he's my dog yes but he was hers. Come on out. Carry. What? Sherlock, what are you talking about? What are you doing? Making a call.

To who? Archie, this way! 207-541-662-3211. Oh Jesus, look mate, it's not... Her. Look mate, it's not... Huh. To binge this adventure in full, and without ads, go to patreon.com forward slash Sherlock and Co. The You