Sh**ged Married Annoyed - Ep. 126 Good Grief
Episode Date: July 23, 2021Rosie's been to the dentist and Chris can finally breathe a sigh of relief. There's laundry and chewing gum based beef and trips down holiday memory lane. Become a member at https://plus.acast.com/s/s...ma. https://plus.acast.com/s/sma. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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This Friday.
You must be very careful, Margaret.
It's a girl.
Witness the birth.
Bad things will start to happen.
Evil things.
Of evil.
It's all.
No, don't.
The first omen.
I believe the girl is to be the mother.
Mother of what?
Is the most terrifying... 666 is the mark of the devil.
Movie of the year.
It's not real.
It's not real.
Who said that?
The First Omen.
In theatres Friday.
Gits and Gits Now.
Hello, you're listening to Shag Married Annoyed
with me, Rosie Ramsey,
and my husband, Chris Ramsey.
Hello!
Nice to have you back.
Lovely to have you back. Hi!
How are you?
It's been a week. It feels so long!
But it's been a week.
It has been a week.
We're all good.
Been a lovely week.
Lovely week indeed. Now guys, listen, this is episode one.
Ah, you've just kicked us under the table.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
What did I do?
Nothing. I was just moving me leg.
Ah, your toe went in between mine. It was really horrible.
Sorry, I thought you liked that.
No, not at all.
Not one part of me likes that.
Foreplay, Chris.
Not during the podcast.
And not ever.
I read foreplay.
Guys, it's episode one, two, six.
And we're going to crack straight on this week.
Plenty to get through.
Now, before we go any further,
it is time for this week's lucrative, lucrative sponsor.
This week's sponsor is
yeah
bouncy balls
hate them
hey shut up
hey
don't be slagging that off
don't tell me to shut up
hey listen
my mam is downstairs
and she will
lamp you
why
into next week
telling her daughter
to shut up
I thought you meant
because she doesn't like
bouncy balls
no
listen
listen
these pay the bills
right
not money we're getting a million bouncy balls delivered tomorrow on the back of a big truck right I've sorted it out she doesn't like bouncy balls. No. Listen, listen. These pay the bills, right? Not money.
We're getting a million bouncy balls delivered tomorrow on the back of a big truck, right?
I've sorted it out.
Don't want a million bouncy balls.
I've sorted it out, right?
There's nothing you can do about it.
Bouncy balls.
Hey, hey.
Remember bouncy balls?
Eh?
Robben got one the other day.
I've been playing with it.
That's where this comes from.
Hey.
Stand in the kitchen.
You got a tile for?
Eh?
Boing.
Bounce it down.
Catch it.
How fun.
Hey.
Bounce it to the side.
Where's it gone?
Too fast.
It's slowed down. You can see it again
Bouncy balls
Choke and hazard
For kids
Hate them
No man
Honestly
Shouldn't be allowed to sell them
We'll get in trouble
Should have an age
No
Limit on them
Probably have to be fair
Stop putting them in party bags
Bounce it as hard as you can
Hit the ceiling
Yay
Bouncy balls
Fun for me.
Fun for you.
Fun for the whole family.
Don't put them in your mouth.
Choking hazards.
Bounce it.
Stop it.
Terrified when I have any kids playing with one.
Yeah, we're going to get in trouble.
Can't have anything small on the floor at all because we've got a baby.
Going to get in trouble.
Really hard to keep on top of.
Let's just move on.
Anyway, bouncy balls.
Well, you shot all over that.
Yeah, they are shit.
The big ones are worse.
You know, the massive big ones.
Well, why?
Because they're not a choking hazard. So why are you slapping them on? I don't know, but they don't bounce very well, do they? They're just massive. Oh, they are shit. The big ones are worse. You know, the massive big ones. Well, why? Because they're not a choking hazard,
so why are you slagging them off?
No, I know,
but they don't bounce very well,
do they?
They're just massive.
Oh, brilliant, brilliant.
So you don't like the little ones
that bounce off
because they're a choking hazard.
So make them not a choking hazard
and you slag them off as well.
Do you like a tennis ball?
Yeah, I don't mind tennis balls
for outside.
Oh, gobstoppers are still a thing.
Gobstoppers?
Remember gobstoppers?
Oh, I wish they were.
I'll tell you what,
I'll be giving you one right now
yes I saw one the other day
like massive ones
so
the gobstoppers
you just sucked on them
for ages
do you remember them
how disgusting are they
there was gobstoppers
so can you remember
there was gobstoppers
right
so anyone who doesn't get this
basically gobstoppers
it was like a round sweet
like an immensely hard
probably boiled sweet but like maybe different oh it was crazy hard round sweet like an immensely hard probably boiled sweet
but like maybe different
oh it was crazy hard
and you could put them
in your mouth
and you literally
just had to suck them
forever
you could not bite them
you just had to suck them
forever
can you remember
giant gobstops
that's what I'm talking about
the massive
right
like the size of a tennis ball
I've just had a flashback
and you just had to suck it
but it would take you weeks
I remember
going round
to my mate's
cousin's house
they lived round the corner
I lived on the estate when my mum and dad when I They lived round the corner. I lived on the estate
when my mum and dad,
when I grew up.
Round the corner,
round the bungalow.
So this is them kind,
it was one of them kind of estates
where across the street,
one of me mates lived.
But then round the corner of the bungalow,
his cousin lived.
So there was a lot of that going on.
People living across the road
from their nannies and stuff.
You know,
I brought a North East working class.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I remember going round once,
they were watching
The Wizard of Oz
during the day
in the summer
holidays
and each of the
kids had
a giant
gobstopper
and I
couldn't
believe what
was going on
because a giant
gobstopper is a
lolly without a
stick
massive
it's the size
of a tennis
ball
it's huge
they were just
holding it in
their hands
and they were
sucking them
and the like
white stuff
was like
running down
their wrists
it was fucking disgusting but then but then it turns
to dust yeah do you get a really dusty cotton well it gets different layers as well but they
were literally just holding them like like in their hands like apples but just just licked them
well and even at like what i must have been seven and i'm just thinking this is fucking revolting
that's so bad this is revolt we weren't allowed them horrible and if we probably
probably if we got one
we'd have to share it
between us
that would be you like
yeah that would be you like
give your brother a lick
your brother needs a lick now
man he's licked the same side as me
that's not his side
I don't want to lick his side
we'd have to portion it off
into little chunks
your dad would be
your dad would be in the garage
with a saw
Derek
saw that gobstop I had equal bits you know what happened last time In their little chunks. Oh, God. Your dad will be in the garage with a saw. Derek!
Saw that gobstop.
I had equal bits.
You know what happened last time?
Oh, you just keep snapping the blades on me jigsaw, man, Sandra.
Fucking your family, honestly.
Yeah, I love them.
The Clampets.
Oh, hey.
It's not fair.
Here's the jingle.
Here is the jingle, yes. Not the Clampets jingle, our jingle. We had a Here's the jingle. Here is the jingle, yes.
Not the clever jingle, our jingle.
We had a fight about the jingle, jingle.
We couldn't settle on a jingle, jingle.
So this is the jingle, jingle.
We hope you like the jingle, jingle.
Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, bap.
Jingle! Jingle. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, bah. Jingle.
Hello and welcome back to this week's episode of the podcast.
As we said earlier, it's lovely to have you back.
It is. It always is.
It is. How are you?
I'm alright, you know.
You're better. You're a better version of yourself this week, aren't you?
Oh my gosh, I really am.
Can you explain to everyone what's happened?
Oh, so I don't know whether, I didn't say it last week, but you know how I've had a bad jaw?
Well, we thought you had a bad jaw.
We thought I had a bad jaw.
Turns out my tooth was dying.
Great.
So my tooth has been dying.
Wow.
Didn't even know.
Just gave in.
Just didn't even, someone turned the machine off on my tooth and it wasn't even there.
It's dark.
I can't have that, it's a bit dark, sorry.
Nobody got me to sign anything.
Wow.
So that's why my jaw,
I thought it was my jaw,
because I thought I had TMJ,
but it wasn't, it was my tooth,
and it's been really hurting.
Then I got an abscess,
and I had to go to the emergency dentist
to get the abscess lanced.
Shout out to Instagram, by the way,
because you had to resort,
after I phoned every single dentist
in the North East literally
yeah
Saturdays
just don't fancy it
apparently no one
gets a bad teeth
on a Saturday
well I did make that joke
with the dentist
right
and he wasn't very happy
I don't think
why not
because I just think
they want a weekend off
and I can kind of get
both days
well people work
what you're going to
always have time off
no one ever has to have
time off work
to go for a dentist appointment
close a fucking Monday
have your Sunday Monday and open on a Saturday that to go for a dentist appointment close it fucking Monday have your Sunday
Monday and open
on a Saturday
that's what hairdressers
do
yeah it would make
more sense
I know I'm going to
get a slew of emails
off dentists
going oh we will
oh hey man
listen right
okay I understand
but all I'm saying
is a Saturday
doctors as well
doctors is the same
Chris tell us about it
print more money
you know what I mean
that was how your nana
wanted to fix the recession
wasn't it
why don't they just
print more money
Rosie's nana wanted to
fix the recession
by printing more money
which apparently
I think they did actually
consider doing
did they
just print more money
yeah I think so
yeah I think so
I don't know
I don't know much about it
personally
but I imagine
she's got a point
she's got a point
brilliant
brilliant
so yeah so you phoned up the emergency dentist on a saturday well sorry you went on
instagram to ask but i we're trying to get a freebie you paid for it and i had literally
phoned every single dentist yeah well the reason i got it sorted was because um we went to london
obviously and i needed it done yeah because i was terrified that i was just being so much pain
but um the thing is as well um i just want to take a
second to apologize to anybody i might have spoke to within a meter radius yeah in the last how long
nine months maybe six six to nine months that's how long it's been yeah yeah it's been killing
for six months six months yeah okay um my breath's being disgusting yeah it's been yeah
you never told me this i
mentioned it a couple of times but you know i can't just keep hammering home that your breath
stinks like i mean you do it to me um but it's not it's not my it's not my bag and then recently
your mom sort of it did was it heroic was it stupid but your mom went to the shop and came
back with like just a bag of stuff for your teeth interdental she was like interdental floss things
the little swords
with bristles on
she gave you them
and she just laid it on
really thick
about how your breath
was lifting
so I thought
well job done
she's took the bullet
for me there
I'm mortified
I've been physically
assaulted by you
I am mortified by this
I'm so embarrassed
but
I did realise
I did
I have had
I've had a horrible
taste in my mouth
for months
like I would literally brush my floss my teeth brush my teeth and still have a minging taste in my mouth yeah
it was you would get into bed and it would still i was like i was lying next to a dog some nights
i would roll over in the night you know you'd be like i don't have to turn over shut up like a dog
fart in my mouth yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah well it well of course it is because my tooth was dying
and apparently it was massively infected.
That's when I got the abscess.
The dentist had to disinfect my whole gums.
He actually used the word disinfect, which I found really grim.
And yeah, so...
He lanced it then, he lanced the abscess.
So when I was there, he lanced the abscess, right?
And I remember thinking, his breath stinks.
You're such an arsehole.
That was your go-to.
Your go-to wasn't.
I thought he had halitosis.
The dentist!
I swear to God, I did.
Guys, she thought the dentist.
Listen to yourself.
You are so ridiculous with smells.
You thought the dentist.
How arrogant are you about your dental hygiene?
That you thought a dentist had halitosis?
I'm sorry it
was so bad but then i realized it must have been me because they both had gas masks yeah probably
a bit yeah probably and because he's a fucking dentist and he's not gonna stink do you not think
dentists could have bad breath probably not no i mean they're telling you to floss every five
minutes do all kinds do you know they want in a perfect world they want you to floss and use them little brush things
and then brush
and then you know
you're not supposed to
apparently you're not supposed
to rinse your mouth out
after you've brushed
because you're supposed to
leave like a layer
of fluoride on your
fluoride?
fluoride, fluoride
whatever
you've got to leave
like a layer of it
on your teeth
apparently so
but yeah
so I'm just really
I'm so embarrassed
wow
that my breath's been bad
but it has got better
hasn't it
almost instantly the day you came back it was better yeah shut. That my breath's been bad. But it has got better, hasn't it? Almost instantly.
Wow.
The day you came back, it was better.
Yeah.
Shut up.
Crazy.
My mouth has been dying.
Bad, that like.
I'm so embarrassed.
Really bad.
Do you know what?
I remember when I was younger,
weirdly one of my mates was in my house
while I was brushing my teeth when I was younger.
And I was brushing my teeth.
I remember I didn't gargle.
I just brushed my teeth, spat,
and then I just put the thing back on.
And he went on about it
he made a really big thing
of it
he was like
oh you're not gargling
you scruff
oh you scruff
he made a proper big thing
about it
he's in prison now
so I won
just saying
what's he in prison for
I don't really want to go into it
but he's in prison
right okay
but I won
slam dunk
oh great
I'm a petty man. Oh, great.
I'm a petty man.
I do hold on to things.
I hold on to things.
I wonder if he's still gargling in prison.
Well, it depends.
He's got access to a sinkhole.
I don't know.
He'll be all right.
So, obviously, I've told you all this about my teeth.
Yeah.
And I feel like now people are going to look up.
If somebody told me about themselves, right,
if I didn't know them,
I would look at pictures of them and look at them and go,
you're disgusting.
Right.
And I'm worried that people are now going to look at pictures of me on Instagram and go, she fucking stinks.
No, you don't anymore.
No, I don't anymore.
Stop now.
But they're going to have that impression that my breath just stinks.
What are you going to do if people are like,
I'm going to be like, oh, yeah.
Oh, of course.
I'm so glad you got it sorted because yeah
did you have that since school?
No I don't.
Has that been
that's been years
because I remember seeing you
in 2001
and I was
my eyes were watering.
No because it is a bit
What are you going to do
if they think it was ages?
I'll be
I'll be
horrified
to be honest
because I do like
really smelly foods though.
Yeah.
Like I love garlic
I put like nine cloves of garlic in every meal.
Can you remember when we lived in the One Story Glory
and your friend came around and walked in and asked us,
she literally said,
guys, do you just drink garlic before people come here?
Do you bathe in garlic?
Do you bathe in garlic before people arrive?
That was nice of her.
It's really good for you though.
It's really, really good for you, garlic.
It's not good for social occasions, but yeah.
I know it's not,
but I think it depends what kind of garlic it is
if it's fresh garlic
that's not as bad
if it's like a garlic sauce
from a kebab shop
that is lifting
can we talk about
the garlic bread
you tried to make me
the other day
that nearly killed us
what the fuck
did you do with that
so
I cooked it wrong
so you know how
Rosie doesn't
guys I've mentioned before
how Rosie just refuses
to put me garlic bread in the oven we'll make anything and I'll go put the garlic've mentioned before how Rosie just refuses to put me garlic bread in
the oven
we'll make anything
and I'll put the
garlic bread in
you just don't do
me garlic bread
she went the other
way
I don't understand
why you have to
have garlic bread
with every meal
like carbs like
starch like garlic bread
like we could have
chicken potatoes and
veg and you'd have
a bit of garlic bread
you've got to have
garlic bread on the
side what do you
think this is
Nando's do it
garlic bread you've
got to have garlic
bread with everything
I don't get it well listen you went the other way it was really it
was really strange you were like look i'm gonna make it from scratch because i've got some tiger
bread so you made some garlic bread it's fucking disgusting it tasted like it tasted like yeah it
tasted like hate well because i did it wrong so normally when i make garlic bread it's really
nice because you just kind of crush garlic clove mix it with butter and then put it on the bread but then grill it so it kind of like cooks it a bit but you
and you should really cook the garlic first like fry it off a little bit right didn't do that
brilliant and then what i did was i'd kind of butter the garlic onto the bread and then you
put cheese on top and just put in the oven yeah so it didn't cook or any or crust or anything
just like yeah it was warm bread
with melted cheese
and raw garlic on
it was horrible
absolutely horrible
I didn't think that through
sorry about that
oh there we go
that was awful
so good for you though
very very healthy
yeah yeah
haven't had a cold
you know
didn't enjoy eating it
but haven't had a cold
can't be dazed
anyway are you alright now
what do you mean
are you ok now
is your face hurting
no why it's killing me hey wow lads Anyway, are you all right now? What do you mean? Are you okay now? Is your face hurting? No, why?
It's killing me.
Hey!
Wow.
Lads.
Lads.
No.
Lads?
Nobody's listening.
Lads.
Nobody's laughing.
Who's that?
I don't know where the lads are.
Where are the lads?
There's no lads.
Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo.
It's time for What's Your Beef?
What is your beef?
Oh.
Oh.
I miss the beefs.
Well, put some fucking effort in.
I just can't be arsed.
I don't know what they...
They haven't rang.
Brilliant.
I can't be arsed.
They haven't rang.
I don't know what they'll do.
Class.
They will be back.
Ladies first or gentlemen first?
You go first.
You want me to go first?
No gentleman, a man.
Wow.
I feel like I may be revisiting a beef that I've done.
It's definitely something I've mentioned in the stand-up,
but I don't know if I've mentioned it at this specific point.
Don't be bringing your stand-up to our podcast.
Excuse me.
Mr. Has-been.
Has-been?
You haven't toured for over a year.
Not my fucking fault love
not my fault has been tickets still available for our tour actually and my tour and my tour
september sold out is there still ones for your tour some some venues have got some allocation
left but most of mine are sold out okay yeah i just can't wait to get back on i've got some
warm up shows coming up as well in the North East in August.
So please keep an eye out for those guys
because I need to learn the show again.
Yeah.
Because I haven't done it for a year and a half.
We need to write our tour show.
Yeah.
It's halfway there, man.
It's halfway there, man.
Do you think?
It's all good.
Yeah, I was brought to the back of it doing the pilot.
We know exactly what we're doing.
True, true, true.
Got some good stuff in store for that tour.
I can't wait.
Maybe then.
But yeah, warm-ups for my show are going to happen soon.
Do you know what I'm going to do, Rosie?
You know what my process is?
What?
I've got my 2022.
I saved in my phone from the last gig that I did of it.
Well, it's not the last gig I did.
It's the second last gig I did.
Because the last gig I did, I couldn't do it properly
because I was worried about the pandemic that was happening at the time
because I was quite scared.
And all I'm going to do is sit and listen with my headphones and
build Lego for three days, listen to it
and then do gigs on the night. So you've recorded it
audio. Audio is recorded on your phone.
Yeah. Good for you. So there we go.
Is that when I'm at Haggerston Castle?
That is when you are, yes, at Haggerston Castle
for the kids. Haggerston.
And I will be doing Lego, listening
and then doing the shows on the night. Okay.
So there we go. Have a lovely time. Living la vida
loca.
Like a has-been. Now, my
problem with you, my beef with you this week is...
Problem with you? That's cruel. Yeah, sorry
about that. Sounded a bit harsh, didn't it? Yeah.
I did the washing the other day
and I got
from the washing basket
what I thought was a pair of your jeans.
I pulled out, it was like
in Toy Story where the grabber goes down
and he thinks he's grabbed a buzz but he's got a woody on the bottom
as well. He got extra, a little extra.
Because what I got was, I pulled your jeans
out and your jeans were inside out
because you take them, I don't know what you do, I don't know
what kind of hurry you're in, but you
took them off inside out, then your inside
out knickers were over the top of those
jeans, like fucking Superman's pants, right?
And then the two socks were also inside the legs.
Okay.
Like Thanos had snapped his fingers and you disintegrated, but your clothes had stayed.
Right.
What is wrong with you?
What?
Why do they all come off in one go, like it's a fucking onesie?
I take them off when I'm on the toilet.
That's just made it even worse. Why? I don't know why why but that's just made it even worse before before i go to bed how desperate
are you what you're imminently about to shit your pants that you've just got to whip all of your
clothes off in one go no so it's but it's when i'm getting ready to get changed for bed or whatever
or if i'm going in the shower i'll just take my clothes off while i'm sat on the loo right and
because women sit on the
toilet yeah as you know the men when they need a poo well exactly right okay so i just take them
all off and then when i get to the bottom i just whip my socks off at the same time how do they all
stay in the pad it's good jeans tight they're tight that's why you don't you don't wear tight
leggingly jeans i don't see your problem
so then they just
go in the washing basket
and I'm sorry
I'm going to separate
them all out
oh Chris
you never do the washing
listen
don't give me this
bullshit
on the rare occasion
I do it
I don't want to be
peeling your underkegs
off your jeans
oh hey
well alright
marry someone else
and wait
seven years
see if you're not
peeling their underkegs off
do you know what I mean so it'll be all it'll be lovely for the first few years you'll go oh my gosh And wait seven years. See if you're not peeling their underkegs off.
Do you know what I mean?
So it'll be lovely for the first few years.
You'll go, oh my gosh, this is so lovely.
Oh, isn't this great?
And then you'll get right into it. Well, yeah, because they'll probably be wearing big parachute kegs
like you're wearing at the minute.
Oh, you can absolutely.
I'll whip them down.
I'll whip them off.
The wind off them.
Blimmin' blows little Rafe out of the room.
Wow.
It's like I'm doing that thing at school
where you all stand around and go.
You little pig. I'm still in my maternity knickers
how dare you
they are so comfortable
and they bring me a lot of pleasure
how dare you
they keep my gun in
something beautiful
I don't ever want to
downsize me, Nickers.
You're never coming out with maternity kids.
I don't think I am.
You're never coming out with them.
Some of them aren't even maternity, Nickers.
They're just four sizes too big for us.
Right, there we go.
Honestly, I love them so much.
Yes.
Love them.
Well, you know what?
If you enjoy it, that's fine.
Thank you.
You've been through the wringer with your tooth and the baby.
Tell us about it.
Tell us about it.
All right, all right, all right.
I'm just not doing the washing anymore.
Deal, deal.
Good, thanks.
Prick.
What's your beef?
Oh, have I not done mine?
Nope.
Okay, I thought I'd done mine.
No.
I mean, yeah.
You've done it.
No, no, no, no.
So, hey, babadoo babadoo bab.
Hey, it's time for all questions from the best user guys
who want to email in a joke.
My beef with you, Christopher Ramsey, this week is...
Full named.
I hate the way you eat chewing gum.
Sorry?
What?
You don't eat chewing gum like regular folk.
I don't chew my mouth open that often.
Don't be giving it that.
No, no, no.
It's not the way you chew.
Right, well, what the fuck's this?
You place a piece of chewing gum in your hand.
Right.
You know, a little extra one or whatever.
A little rectangular bad lad.
Yeah, yeah.
And then you proceed to open your mouth really wide
and throw it in.
Fuck off, man.
You do.
You know you do.
Why don't you be watching me, you pervert?
You can't take your fucking eyes off me, can you?
Chris, you do it every single time.
Just watching me non-stop.
Everything's a competition.
Why don't you just use your fingers?
I've got to throw it in my mouth. Everything's
a competition. Yes, but it's extremely annoying
when you miss your mouth.
It hits your tooth and you
have to do it again. Sometimes it hits my tooth
but still goes in my mouth. It just makes a really satisfying
click noise as it goes in.
It's awful to witness. It's awful.
When have you seen that? You do it all the time.
It's how you eat chewing gum.
It's horrific. And sometimes you have two at a time so you're the time it's how you eat chewing gum it's horrific
and sometimes you have two at a time
so you're just like
oh you get a good rattle
when you do two
you get a good tooth rattle
it's bloody great
so weird
so weird
I can't believe you've noticed that
but it's one of them things
where you do it
when you're typing
on a laptop
on a keyboard
you'll go
really fast
for no reason at all
and you'll spell everything wrong
and I'm just over your shoulder going,
just fucking slow down
and you wouldn't make mistakes.
Busy, busy.
Got a lot on.
No, it's the same with chewing gum.
Got a lot on.
Pick it up with your fingers,
place it in your mouth
and you'd save more time
than hulking it
into the back of your throat
like a beaver
with a bit of grass.
I kind of believe this.
I kind of live my life, yeah.
I kind of live my life.
Do you see how oppressed I am,
ladies and gentlemen?
Do you see how oppressed?
I can't even throw a chewing gum
in my mouth.
Listen, it's a satisfying
little slam dunk you get
when you flick the chewing gum
in your mouth, right?
It's horrible.
Honestly, you are.
You're a dictator.
You're an ogre.
Do you know that?
You're an ogre to live with.
This is horrible.
Horrible.
Sick of this.
God, you put a horrible
taste in my mouth. Where's my chewing gum?
Throw it in miles away. It's probably fucking on
the other side of the room.
That's the way I keep it.
Babadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabadoobabado This is the Rishi Keshe Herway, the visionary behind the groundbreaking Song Exploder podcast and Netflix series.
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April 5th at
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For tickets, visit
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This Friday
You must be very careful, Margaret.
It's a girl. Witness the birth
Bad things will start to happen. Evil things
of evil. It's
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The first omen
I believe the girl is to be the mother.
Mother of what?
Is the most terrifying.
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That's sunrisechallenge.ca That's sunrisechallenge.ca
It's time for questions from the public!
Public!
As always, you absolute beauties, if you want to get in touch, it's shagmoudanoid at gmail.com
Please continue to send us all of your juicy
juicy juicy things
juicier the better
juicier the better
dirty as you like
dirty
Alsatians the lot
is that a boss electa
dirty
what is that
it might be boss electa
I don't know
Alsatians the lot
where I've got that from
I don't know
I feel like it's got
a boss electa vibe
it's definitely got
brilliant
wasn't it Christina Aguilera that used to do Dead Dirty?
Dead Dirty.
Alsatians a lot, it must be.
Oh, gosh.
Alsatians a lot.
Wow.
Well, don't sell anything dirty Alsatians.
I went on into that.
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Shagmyronroad at gmail.com.
Rosie, what you got? Hi, Rosieie and chris relatively new listener here the podcast was suggested to
me by the guy i have started dating so shout out to him oh yeah but don't break up though because
we're gonna lose two listeners that is true because she'll not listen to it because he
reminded of him and he'll be like oh yeah she ruined that for me so we'll lose but so you have
to get married and oh we going to lose two listeners.
We have to live together forever.
I think we'll be alright.
And have children. I want your children to listen as well.
Wow, stop it.
Sorry, I'm getting... He also suggested for me to write in with my story.
So here it is.
Wonderful.
Me and my ex-boyfriend had gone into town to have a few drinks and some food.
We decided to go to a bar that gives you a free mini pizza with each drink.
Sorry?
Yeah.
Each drink?
Aye, apparently so.
So each round or each drink?
Well, I'm guessing each round, not each drink.
I think the bar would probably go under.
A mini pizza?
Well, I mean, it could be like a bruschetta.
Right.
Do you know what I mean?
But a mini...
Where is this bar?
It does sound pretty cool.
It sounds amazing
lying on the stomach
did you ever
did you ever have that thing
you know when you're going
to Hollywood
when you're younger
did you ever have that thing
where you would sit down
I think it was like
Costa del Sol or something
Spain when I was younger
we would sit down
at a table with your parents
and they'd bring the
you know your dad
would order a beer
or whatever
and a lemonade for you
and they'd bring them over
and they'd bring like
a little thing of breadsticks
or something
and you'd be like
oh yeah breadsticks and your mum would be'd be like, oh yeah, breadsticks.
And your mum would be like, don't touch them.
They'll be on the bill at the end.
They're not free.
You've got to pay for them.
You've got to sit your four meals staring at the breadsticks and you weren't allowed to eat them.
Do you not remember the first time that that was found out though?
Yeah, yeah.
The first time that was found out and the parents just absolutely mortified. Whoa, whoa, whoa, we didn't know all of these. You put them down, though. Yeah, yeah. The first time that was found out, and the parents just absolutely mortified.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, we didn't order these!
You put them down, we thought they were free!
No, sir, it's not free.
Ah, hey, man, you think this is?
The bands have ate six packets!
Are you kidding this?
What a sad day that was, though,
when you just had to look at them absolutely clamming.
Honestly, I spent many a holiday staring out a bowl of,
either a bowl of bread or a little tube of breadsticks. I spent many a holiday staring out a bowl of either a bowl of
bread or a little tube of breadsticks i spent many holidays staring them out when they'd come
and get another drink soda and just take them away yeah yeah yeah by the way yeah
and pre-covid they would do the round if it was all british people they would just get past the
parcel done on the table it was just like what a memory like i know we're working class i know like you know
where we you know i mean we grew up working class and our parents didn't have you know
a massive disposable income but didn't your mom and dad act like the bill was going to come at
the end and it was going to be like seven grand i'm wondering how much them breadsticks actually
were because it can't be that much like that is uh seven million pesetas
never told you about the year when we went on holiday when it were holiday we used to always
holiday in villas with me nana and granddad but we went on holiday to a hotel personally
best holiday i ever had in the class joined the beach the mini beach club and all that was mint yeah yeah but um
we made friends with another family and my mom was absolutely seething because she'd only brought
enough money for our family oh and then so we would rock up yeah and and be like mommy can we
go get ice creams and then my mom was like my mom had to go she's I'm sure she had to go a night
without having a drink because she had to buy these kids ice creams as well as us.
Bless her.
Honestly, I'm not even joking.
And my mum would be like,
stop bringing them over for ice creams.
We haven't got enough money with us.
I know.
Oh, I feel so sorry for your mum.
No, it was the crack.
But I think they just afforded to be able to go abroad on holiday.
Right. But obviously they had the budget of what the holiday was. it was the crack but I think they just afforded to be able to go abroad on holiday but obviously
had the budget
of what the holiday was
but we were just
bringing kids over
and asking my mum and dad
to get ice creams
and that
didn't you have to go over
to their parents
to get ice creams
yeah we did to be fair
we did
but I think they were
quite well off
should it even itself out then
what's our problem
sort of
but you know
it wasn't an all inclusive hotel
how many
how many ice creams
were you eating your fat little shit yeah but they had four kids oh my god yeah there was three of us
and then four of them oh god i know that's around that's a night out behind seven ice creams
also the catchphrase of all holidays we went on was just me mom and dad if you One of those neat breadsticks can't spare. Seven.
Also, the catchphrase of all holidays we went on was just me, mum and dad,
if you come over here and ask for one more peseta.
Mum can have a peseta for the pool table.
Mum can have a peseta for this.
100 pesetas, man.
It was 100 pesetas, wasn't it?
For the pool tables, one only 100 pesetas.
Everything was 100 pesetas.
100 pesetas, well, it must have been that.
If you come over here and ask for one more
have we mentioned that before
you got your 100%
of everything
but then you got the 25
with the hole in
so you could put it
on your chain
when you went home
and everyone knew
you'd been on hold
I'm sure we've mentioned
that before
but yeah that was the crack
can you remember
those money holders
that you used to go
around your neck
and it was a tube
and you used to put
all your money in it
I went around
my wrist
just like a little
bum bag
it's like a luminous
orange
back in the day
when coins actually
bought stuff
I do remember
the tube one
yeah you put your
tube round your neck
I do remember that
and it like the
bottom screwed off
the top stayed on
like what a fucking
choker man
I never had any
money in it
but they never had
that thing you know
how now everything's
got that breakable
bit on like even
lanyards for like
yeah
offices this is just like hey hang a load of heavy metal around your child's neck on this
bit of string go on you play on the playground son go on you hang yourself from the fucking
climbing frame it's so true oh get him down he's got he's got me breadstick money around his neck
have i ever told you about a little game
that we used to play on holiday
I don't know if I've ever told you this
so you know how we used to go to the little shops
when you were abroad
and you'd buy just bits
and they'd always put them in little paper bags
and then sellotape them together
oh yeah the little gift bags
if you were buying a bottle opener
or a nail clipper
with roads written on it.
Yes, exactly right.
We used to go back to the hotel or whatever or the villa
and we'd get all of the little bags and then we'd go around the villa
and we'd play shops, right?
But we'd just bag things up over and over again.
God, I hated your childhood.
I hate your childhood.
I hate your childhood so much.
Kate would come over with like a little statue from the villa.
She'd be like, can I have this, please?
I'd be like, some of the say that, please.
And I'd bag it up.
And then I'd give it to Kevin.
And then he'd go put it back, give me the bag.
And then she'd go get something else.
I'd bag that up.
And we'd just do it over and over again with the same little bag.
I hate your childhood. I hate your childhood stuff.
I hate your holidays.
You're listening to them.
I just get this sense of bored sadness inside us.
It was so much fun.
It sounds fucking shit.
I mean, now it does.
But back then, I loved playing shops.
Can we talk as well for a moment
about how many random shops in Spain in the 90s just sold swords?
What do you mean?
They just sold swords, knuckle dusters, knives, like loads of knives.
Dick, bloody bottle openers, they're the worst.
Yeah, but like pawn cards.
Yeah, horrific.
Lighters with naked women on.
I don't know, I was like, oh, the English are coming, the dirty fucking violent perverts that they are.
Just dads going mental buying dirty cards. women on I was like oh the English are coming the dirty fucking violent perverts that they are just dads
going mental
buying dirty
cards
don't get
don't get
them breadsticks
I'm saving
all that money
for some
knives and
porn later
you wouldn't
understand
it's so true
why did
why was that
a thing
they weren't
like at the
back of the
shop
they were right in the front they were just like literally they'd be a table of their own or a pack of layers crisps and then just a karma
super a porn card collection with photos of people booking each other on it was fucking
disgusting i'm scarred for life honestly Hiya, can I get a 10 euro phone card
and a pack of porn cards for my wife, please?
And a knuckle duster with a knife on the bottom of it, please.
I've never thought about that, but it's so true.
Horrible, isn't it?
So strange.
I remember looking at them for a long time.
Oh, God, yeah.
It was like, yeah, I would stand up to count my dad.
He'd be like, don't look down.
Don't look at them, son.
But just to get some crisps and some sun cream.
That was another one.
Don't buy the sun cream over there.
Take it away.
Cost you a fortune over there, the sun cream.
Then have your eyes out.
Don't take anything.
Don't buy anything there.
Take all your shampoo, all your conditioner, everything.
But again, I know we're coming from another angle,
but it's a couple of quid more.
It's a couple of quid more.
And if you're in an emergency, you need to get it.
But they acted like
it was millions
of pounds
they acted like
they would get home
and go well
we're living on
the streets now
because we'll just
have to swap
our house
for some fucking
factor 30
because you forgot
to bring it
you useless twat
like it was like
they just made it
they made it
like the biggest thing
I think we're being
you know
we've come from
a working class
background
we are lucky
enough now and we you know know, I say lucky,
but we're crafted and I'm proud of us.
We are not working class right now.
Yeah, no.
But I get it and it's all, but look at that.
Like it's budgeting, it's budgeting and kind of being savvy with your money.
But I totally, like that was the craft.
You didn't, my parents bought nothing.
Nothing that you could get in England was bought abroad,
if that makes sense.
Yeah.
It's funny, man.
It's nice to think about it and look back on it.
Different world.
It is.
My mum is sometimes very much still stuck in that frame of mind
for certain things,
but then certain things she's absolutely not.
Like wanting to go to that bloody
private island
oh yeah yeah yeah
but then at the same time
she'll always steal
a banana from the
breakfast counter
and a croissant
for later
I'm like mum
we're going for lunch
she's like well
I'm like you don't need it
Sandra get the croissants
out of your bag
it's all inclusive
no
I can't
it's ingrained in us
I just have to take them
Sandra
get all that stuff
out your bag
put the porn cards back
get the other stuff
out your bag
where did you get them
I kept them for a while
I didn't sell them anymore
oh I've still got a question
oh you were halfway
through that
yeah
shit
sorry we got totally
sidetracked
what's happened
someone's on holiday
recap
what the hell is this
sorry everyone
they've gone to the bar and they get a free mini pizza with each drink oh hey that's it but they're not on holiday. Recap? What the hell is this? Sorry, everyone. They've gone to the bar
and they get a free mini pizza
with each drink.
Oh, hey, that's it.
But they're not on holiday.
No, they're just in their town.
They're just in the bar.
I don't know where it is.
Mini pizza.
It says here,
we both ordered
a spicy mini pizza each.
Okay.
Unfortunately,
I then started choking
on the toppings of my pizza.
Just the toppings?
Yeah, I don't know why.
Maybe, you know,
when you eat a pizza
and the toppings... More comes off. I hate that. know why maybe you know when you eat a pizza and the toppings
more comes off
I hate that
do you know when the whole
top of the pizza
comes off
and you're like
so what am I left with now
a bit of tomato bread
do you know what I mean though
I hate pizzas
absolutely shit
don't slag pizzas
off on the aisle
but it happens
Chris
it happens most times
I eat a pizza
you're not very good
at eating pizzas then
fold
clearly not
fold the slice
listen
I will use a knife and fork
horrible
I'm not scared
absolutely horrible
it is
I mean it is horrible
watching someone
eat a knife and fork
eat a knife and fork
eat with a knife and fork
eat a pizza with a knife and fork
have you seen that
that video online
like meme or whatever or daft video where some woman's eating a pizza and fork. Eat a pizza with a knife and fork. Have you seen that video online, like meme or whatever,
or daft video where some woman's eating a pizza
and she's just ripping little bits off and it's awful to watch.
She's like butchering this pizza.
No, I've never seen that.
It's very funny.
Anyway, I will get back to this story.
So it's spicy.
Okay, she can't eat it.
She's choking on it.
She's choking on the top ones, okay.
The spice has got the back of my throat and my eyes were streaming.
Oh. I eventually managed to dislodge the food and I put it back of my throat and my eyes were streaming.
I eventually managed to dislodge the food and I put it back on my plate.
So she's just hocked it back up on a plate.
Lovely.
That's nice.
Nice for the people on the next table.
Yeah.
Great.
Safe to say, I wasn't hungry anymore and I decided to leave it.
Put herself off.
Yeah. Got you.
I looked over at my boyfriend at the time, who then decided to pick up the hacked up pizza topping,
shove it on his pizza and eat the full thing without clenching.
Oh, no.
We're not together anymore.
No, never in the world.
Shock.
That's absolutely...
What's wrong?
It's like a baby bird.
She's hocked it back up and he's got half-chewed, choked on, mucus-filled,
and he's put it on his pizza.
What a dirty sod.
Would you even,
I don't even know if I'd do that with the kids.
No.
I would,
I would,
if your,
if your top and it fell off
your pizza,
onto your plate,
I'd pick it up
and put it on.
Not if you'd had it in your mouth
and choked a bit
and then coughed it back out.
Choked on it.
And this is just girlfriend,
this is girlfriend and boyfriend,
they broke up after this,
I'm assuming,
so they hadn't even been
going out that long.
Yeah, they're not together anymore.
Oh, goodness me.
Mr. Covid.
I know.
Oh, heavens above.
Heavens above.
Stick with the breadsticks.
No, I'm joking, aren't you?
I made the money.
Hi, Chris and Rosie.
So a few years ago, I was on a night out and bumped into my ex,
who I just recently split up from. Brackets,
he was a cheating prick. But I thought
I'd be the bigger person and be civil,
but he clearly wasn't capable.
Long story short, I got drunk and went
home with his best mate. Not civil.
Civil as fuck, that, innit?
So anyway, me and his mate were mid-drunk
sex when there was a proper loud
bang on my window. My upstairs
bedroom window. I thought it
must have been a bird or something, so we carried on. A few seconds later, it sounded like the bird
was back, but on steroids and almost smashed through the window. It was that loud. So I opened
the curtains to have a look, and all I saw was my ex's face at the window. The upstairs window.
Saying he wants to talk
nice
his mate was hiding under the quilt while all this was happening
saying you can't let him in
no shit Sherlock
how was he at the upstairs window
he'd only gone in my garage
got a ladder and climbed up the side of my
house
to my bedroom
window thinking he was
it was like a scene
from Romeo and Juliet
wasn't he nasty to her though
apparently he was cheating
but she obviously
again
don't it always seem to go
she obviously went home
with his friend
classy move
and he followed them home
or just followed her home
didn't even follow them
didn't even know the lad was there
went in her garage
got a ladder
and climbed
like was it no one's ever done that for me didn't even follow them didn't even know the lad was there went in our garage got a ladder and climbed like
was it
no one's ever done that for me
I was just
I was just about to say
it's really creepy and weird
but you actually
you're finding it
no one's ever cared that much
no never
honestly
I can't work you out
I thought you would go off it about this and you are literally like hey the lucky girl No, never. Fuck. Honestly. I can't work you out.
I thought you would go off it about this and you are literally like,
eh, the lucky girl.
Kidding me?
One in her bed,
one in her window and a ladder.
I'm jealous.
We should all be so lucky.
Wasn't it Clarissa Explains It All
where the next door neighbour
just used to climb up with a ladder
outside her window?
Yes.
Half Sabrina was in Clarissa Explains Clarissa. Yeah, and then,
so then you grow up watching these programmes
and you think that that's just doable,
but it's not doable.
Well, it is.
You fucking pulled it off, didn't you, to be fair?
Absolutely amazing.
Got it.
Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, bap.
Hello, Chris and Chris Ramsey's wife.
No, it does not say that.
It doesn't say that.
Honestly.
Do you know,
what's that film where they disappear
because nobody talks about them?
What?
And they just start disappearing.
What are you talking about?
What is that?
A film where they disappear
because no one talks about them.
This is going to be...
This...
Nah.
I'm honestly so excited
for how wrong this is going to be.
This is going to be...
No, I don't know what it is.
Okay, there's something...
I'm going to guess here.
I'm going to guess here and I'm going to guess here.
And you're so wrong.
Are you talking about Back to the Future
where they disappear on the photo?
That's got nothing to do with talking about them.
That's because he's altering the past
and his family isn't happening.
You're a...
That's what I'm talking about.
When they start disappearing.
On the photo, they start disappearing.
Yes.
But it's time not talking about them.
No, that's because Marty McFly's mum
isn't going to get with George McFly
because Marty's there and he's changing the...
Rewriting the history and stuff.
Right.
Well, it's of that premise.
Right.
Yeah.
What do you mean it's of that premise?
What was the question?
What are you talking about?
I don't know.
What the hell's wrong with you?
Chris Ramsey's wife.
I'm really tired.
Oh, that's what I meant.
So I'm just known as your wife all the time.
I'm just going to, bits of us are going to start disappearing.
Like my hand will just go and I'll be like,
what's happening to me, Chris?
Not your left hand, it's got the wedding ring on.
Right.
Hi, hope you're well.
Thoughts on people who light more than one scented candle in the same room.
Serial killers, if you ask me.
What's the point in buying a nice smelling candle
to mix it with five other nice fucking smelling candles?
That's too many smells.
Wow.
Okay.
Wow.
I disagree.
Danny and York.
Danny, I disagree.
Wow, okay. I light a fume. Right. I've got about six around the house going off at once. Okay. Wow. I disagree. It's from Danny in York. Danny, I disagree. Wow, okay.
I like a fume.
Right.
I've got about six around the house going off at once.
Yeah.
In different rooms though?
Or all in one room?
There's usually two in a room, different.
It's fine.
You can get away with it.
Yeah.
As long as you've got the similar, I only like certain smells.
Uh-huh.
So it's not like I've got vanilla not going off in one room and bergamot in the other.
Right.
You know what I mean?
They're all, you kind of walk through.
That's a matter made up.
Bergamot.
Is that made up?
No, it's a thing.
It's a scent.
But I think it's a plant.
Don't know.
Joe Malone does a lot of bergamot.
Great.
It's a thing.
Okay.
Bergamot.
Okay.
So you wouldn't have bergamot and vanilla
at the same time?
No.
Okay.
No.
Well, Danny from York is absolutely raging.
I think we just
lost a listener
Danny
sorry Danny
nice to know you
however
this happens now and then
right
at the bottom of the email
she wrote
PS I sent you a sick one
a few months back
check it out
sick means
in this instance
disgusting
so we've got another one
from the same person
not like oh that's sick
that's sick bro
not like sick good
like sick like
not good.
Okay.
So this is the first one you sent, right?
And I went and read it.
And truly, it did.
It is a bit disgusting.
Okay.
I've got a dirty rank one for you.
Good.
Oh, get in.
I can see it.
I can see it in me mind's eye.
Bet you say that to all the boys.
Me and my fiancé were in Tenerife on a holiday a few years back.
We went to Siam Park.
Brack, it's an amazing place.
It's a water park.
It's the water park.
Yeah, it's really good.
With the dragon.
Yeah, I went there on my mate Stag do.
But we got so pissed the night before,
we ended up going there during the school holidays at about...
We must have got there about one o'clock in the afternoon.
It's not a good time.
Hell on earth.
Yeah.
The lazy river looked like a bowl of fucking Cheerios. Oh. I've never seen so many... Look at the Verrugia advert. I've never seen so many people in there. It's not a good time. Hell on earth. Yeah. The lazy river looked like a bowl of fucking Cheerios.
Oh.
I've never seen so many,
it looked like a Veruca advert.
I've never seen so many people
in the thing.
It was unbelievable.
Monkey.
One of the queues
for the slides
was 90 minutes.
Oh.
No.
What's the point?
90 minutes.
I hate water parks abroad.
Have you ever walked around
without your shoes on?
Always.
Yeah, but you can't
because you can't walk
on the pavement.
Because it's too hot.
So you've just got to run
in the shadows.
It's horrible.
You've just got to run in the shadows.
You know what I mean, though?
You see everybody just hanging on to the fences and that,
walking along on the shaded bits of pavement
and then running across to other rides and that.
Just like...
Because you can't wear your
flip-flops hell i'm angry for water parks i'm just not that person yeah i quite like a water park but
not it was very busy but listen to this right in line for one of the rides brackets barefoot as you
are in a water park there you go rosie we were sickened and shocked by the following while waiting
in the queue for the water ride about 15 people
from the front and another few families behind us brackets we couldn't escape the daughter brackets
about 15 years old in front of us started to pick her dad's back skin that was peeling from sunburn
not only was this horrid but it was dropping onto the floor right where we were about to stand.
As we went behind them in the line for the ride.
Her mother then joined in shortly after.
No.
And like a bunch of monkeys picking bugs.
Me and my partner were sickened.
Oh, no way.
Me and my partner were sickened.
Oh, you were.
And with nowhere to go but forward, had to walk into the dead skin barefoot.
That's disgusting.
Oh, no.
I'm sorry.
I just love that.
It's a family affair.
Come on, kids.
Kill a bit of time in this queue Pick your dad's back skin
Come on
Honest to God
You've got your stopwatch mum
I have
Go
Who gets the most back skin
That's horrible
New from Mattel
Dad back skin picking
Who gets the most
Don't draw blood
You're out
Here's your tea kids
Put them in the sun to dry Crisp Oh man You're out. Here's your tea, kids.
Put them in the sun to dry.
Crisp.
Oh, man.
That's horrible.
That's like, sometimes you see people do things and you want to go up to them and go,
do you know you're in public?
So, obviously that's fine to do.
You know, crack on.
Do it when you get back to the hotel. Yeah on do it when you get back to the hotel yeah
do it when you get back to the hotel
you're in public
fucking disgusting
it's not nice is it
yeah
no it's not good
and then to walk through it
yeah I mean bless them
depends how
depends what age I was
or circumstance
but I would probably say something
really
a little bit of a
yeah
I'd probably just go
excuse me
but
we've got to walk through that
do you know what I mean though yeah Yeah, I'd probably just go, excuse me, but we've got to walk through that.
Do you know what I mean, though?
I understand what you're doing.
And I've had back skin coming off myself and I get it.
Honestly, the day, the peeling, not good.
But we've got to walk through that with no shoes on.
So could you not, please? Or catch it in your hands and put it in the bin?
Oh, put it in the bin.
Proper minging that way.
Catch it in your hands, go to a wedding, when they come out of the church, throw it in the air.
Congratulations!
Hi, Chris and Rosie.
Hi.
My boyfriend has this weird thing that he does, where when we're out on a night out or at a party,
he'll say to me,
shall we go up to people and tell them we're brother and sister
and then start getting off?
He thinks it's a hilarious idea for a joke
and suggests it quite frequently.
I think it's really weird.
Can you please settle this for us?
That's horrific.
I've heard of that joke or practical joke before.
Have you?
Yeah, yeah, I've heard of it somewhere,
but I've never heard of a bloke just going,
can we go up and do that
at every party
he just wants to do it
apparently he's doing it
all the time
he suggests it
quite frequently
do you know what
that says to me
fancies his sister
right okay
that's all that says to me
and he's wanting to live out
his little
you know
incestuous secrets
I think he just wants
to fuck with people
that would be awful
mind if you met a couple and they were like oh this is my this is my sister incestuous secrets I think he just wants to fuck with people that would be awful mind
if you met a couple
and they were like
oh this is me
this is me sister
and then
and then you'd just
see them necking off
you'd be like
what the
flip
I'd know
I'd be like
they're not
if I just met them
if I knew they were
brother and sister
if I knew knew knew
when they started
necking on
I'd be like
right okay
but if I just met them
I'd be like
this is a fucking
wind up
no you wouldn't who fucking starts necking on I'd be like right okay but if I'd just met them I'd be like this is a fucking wind up no you wouldn't
who fucking starts
necking on at a party
who just starts
randomly necking on
with each other
when they're in the
oh hi
my name's Dave
this is my sister
watch this
and there's a fucking set up
I mean
later on in the evening
you've met them
what a shitty night
what a long game
you'd have to play
how crap
how fucking rubbish
I think we should do it.
No.
Everyone knows who we are.
No, there'll be some people who don't know who we are.
Right, okay, here's the deal.
Next time we meet anyone who don't know who we are, right?
Okay, there you go.
Let's wait until there's an opportunity where someone's like,
hello, what do you do?
And genuinely don't know.
And we'll say,
and we'll do it.
Oh my God.
Right?
Oh, I'm getting nervous already.
I'm getting stage fright.
You do look a bit like my brother.
Oh, you've said this before.
It's a bit weird.
I know.
Well, there you go.
Hello.
I'm writing in for your opinions
on my future name, please.
Future name?
Future name.
Okay.
Is this a,
is this a,
is this a baby? Is this a baby baby is this a baby no i think it's
gonna be their their surname all right so it says my surname is good my fiance's surname is grief
should we double barrel and become the good grief family fuck that would be amazing oh my god
whose surname's grief well i like, this isn't real.
But then I did check her who sent it, and her surname is Good.
So, I mean, there's a 50-50 chance that our partner...
Yeah, Grief.
Christopher Grief.
There is some strange surnames out there.
There is, I suppose.
Grief, yeah, it might be, yeah.
But it might not be said Grief.
It might be said, like, Grief.
Do you know when people have got a shit name
and they have to change it?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Right.
But I think they should go for good grief.
100% go for good grief.
Mr. and Mrs. Good Grief.
Yeah.
Double barrel good grief.
Yeah.
So we're saying yes.
Yes.
Always.
Good grief.
Good grief.
We say it every week,
but every week we mean it more.
Thank you so much for coming back and listening.
I know, sorry.
Oh, don't worry.
Okay, yeah, you bunch of twats.
That's better.
There we go.
And we're back in the room.
You've been listening to Shag Marinoid,
which is now part of the Acast Creator Network.
We say it every week, guys,
and every week we mean it more.
Yeah, ref.
No, I do. Wet. You're a big bottle of water. I do, though. Come on it every week, guys. And every week we mean it more, yeah, Ruth. No, I do.
Wait, you're a big bottle of water.
I do, though.
You're a big bottle of water.
We do love you and we do thank you for listening so much.
And we do, I mean, Rosie just said it in a really creepy way.
I know, sorry, I didn't mean it.
Really creepy and strange and I didn't like it.
Guys, if you want to get in touch and tell her how creepy and strange Rosie is,
it's shagmarianoid at gmail.com.
Wotua is on sale now.
December dates for the arena are still on sale.
Get them snapped up
while you can
because they're going to go quick
thank you so much
and we'll be back in your ears
next week
bye
little bit there
little bit
what's the word
like
what
they're going to go quick
once the world opens back up
and once people start going
to full venues
you'll be surprised
how quick they go
honestly
get on it
I'm serious
I hope so
I'm serious
I'm buying tickets for stuff now
I cannot wait.
Yeah, true.
Yeah, cannot wait.
Come on!
Back in the room!
Back in the net!
Back of everything!
Come on!
I'm too excited.
All right, bye.
I'm going to cry.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Rock City, you're the best fans in the league bar none tickets are on sale now for fan appreciation
night on saturday april 13th when the toronto rock hosts the rochester nighthawks at first
ontario center in hamilton at 7 30 p.m you can also lock in your playoff pack right now to
guarantee the same seats for every postseason game and and you'll only pay as we play.
Come along for the ride and punch your ticket
to Rock City at torontorock.com.