SitcomD&D - Sean Meagher's Season 4 Blooper Reel

Episode Date: February 13, 2024

One of our editors, Sean Meagher, shares some of his favorite cut moments from season 4! Thank you for all of your hard work Sean!Voice Over: George Owens Theme Song by: Arne ParrottArtwork by: Waleed MansourEdited by: Sean MeagherSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Dramatisk musikk Oh, goodness! What's a poor soul like you doing out there in the rain? Come in, come in. No, no, no, I insist. The Manzul Road becomes dangerous when night falls. All weary travelers are welcome to find respite at my humble old stoop. Let me light the fire. Oh, good lord! Let me turn it down a little bit. Ah, that? You've got quite a keen eye, haven't you? That there is a book of memories, I suppose you'd call it.

You see, back before the cataclysm, folks used to communicate using things called podcasts. There used to be tens, maybe even fifteens. I'm rambling again. You'll have to excuse me. It's easy to get lost in one's memories. Suffice to say, I used to edit a... I suppose the closest analogy we have now would be a... A Bloodsport cage match. Yes, I edited a Bloodsport cage match called Sitcom D&D.

For a while, it was the most popular one of the bunch. And it was also the last. You see, I fear the cage match grew too big. It twisted and changed into something different. I have no doubt that the war of this world's undoing began in no small part thanks to our influence. That book is the only thing I have left of the old ways, the last vestige of a once mighty kingdom. Well, yes, I suppose I could read some of it whilst we wait for your tunic to dry.

Give it here. A compilation of bloopers from sitcom D&D season four, chapter one. Go get it. It's in the corner. Wait, do we start with Chip saying the thing? Or no? Yeah, yeah. That might be easiest

is to start with chip saying like yeah okay cool but i love that idea ben you should do that when it's time yeah yeah yeah and i'll do it even better look at this look at this oh wait Sorry, Ben. Let Chip give a little bit of information. He has to get something out before you. Okay, yeah. So their time is going to be so good, you guys. I think so. Sorry.

We got a tornado warning. Sorry. Gary. That's really scary. That scared the shit out of me. The back wall just ripped off. I love you guys! Love you, Ben!

Love you, Ben! Good having you on the show! It's been a wonderful couple years! Like and subscribe! Now I know what you're thinking. But don't you worry. Ben did not fly away in that tornado. No, he ended up perishing in a much sadder, far more gruesome manner.

In fact, I do believe it occurred exactly one year after that episode was recorded to the day. Struck down in his prime. But no good dwelling in the past. Let's continue, shall we? Chapter 3. Why not Chapter 2? Well, we actually had another editor working on the cage match. She was from Europe. That's what we used to call the Mud Waste Ruins. She and I would edit every other episode. And before you ask, no, I never got my hands on one where Anthony Birch was on as a guest.

It was a point of contention between us, to be sure. But that's all water under the bridge now. Water was a clear liquid we used to have to drink in order to survive. Kind of like Gatorade is now. Where were we? Oh, yes, yes. Chapter three. What order should we go in, guys?

I think I could go last. Ben, what did you say? I'm sorry. I'm going to go after Elizabeth. She said last. So, Aaron, would you like to do the honors? Go first. Strangest way of doing this.

Okay, Chip. My name's Betty Amnesia. Sorry, let me say it without laughing. I haven't said it out loud yet. I haven't said it out loud yet. Oh, my God. Lillith came up with it. I'm Betty Amnesia.

Sorry, I'm going to die. I'm going to die. You got this. Let's go. What's your name again? Ben. That's right. It's so easy.

What's your name again? Holy crap. Even on his end cast. What's your name again? I got to get you you non-family to give this blue salt to our family chargers up front family just say these words real quick for me please i don't work like that riveting stuff no a fun fact the voice of bennynesia was Erin Keefe, the first woman to fly solo across the Atlantic Ocean. Amelia Earhart? No, no.

Amelia Earhart was a woman who cut her teeth improvising at IO Olympic in Chicago only to move to Los Angeles and accidentally hit an old woman with her car. The old woman was fine but she never quite recovered her reputation, Amelia. She ended up holding a bank hostage and going to prison for a long time. She tunneled her way free. She crawled through eight miles of human excrement. And then ended up on a beach in Zihuatanejo, Mexico. That was Amelia Earhart. I'm quite sure of it. Not the other way around.

Shawshank Redemption? Confused. Me? Listen, you little shit. I don't invite people into my home just so they can tell me I'm confused, all right? There's a certain level of decent... I'm all right. I'm all right. Get your hands off me. Just a bit of a cold. Why don't we do one more chapter and then maybe call it a night? And there's kind of like three concentric circles if you think about it. There's the stairs that lead up to it.

We'll lead yawned. Sorry. Just saying. We'll let the record show. Get to it. I want to go inside this library. I love libraries. And you're in the library.

No, I want to hear more. No, I want to hear more. No, I want to hear more. Old Yon Soil is going off. Old Yon Soil. You didn't have to give yourself that nickname, buddy. You didn't have to do that. I feel like you wanted to say Sawyer, but I love that you said Soil.

You gave yourself such a mean nickname. Old Yon Soil. Alrightil is funny. You gave yourself such a mean nickname. All right. This is the baby replacing me as DM. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done.

I'm done. I'm done. Okay. Okay. No, no, no. We want Sean back. Old yawn. Fuck you guys.

Old yawn. Come on. Sorry, baby. Okay. So the library's big and cool. Oh, whoa. I got him back. I could just picture it perfectly.

Four magnolia trees. All right. Great. Okay, so we're all out of time for this week's episode, so join us next week for the remaining item. Oh, no. No, I was joking. I was joking.

That's a Zootopia. Okay, so, but are all these things here at the library? You've seen Zootopia? Oh, God. We have to be really careful when starting conversations here with Mr. Eppentier. With Chris, yeah. Let me, I can give him invisibility

and barbaric inspiration. Bardic? Barbar-oh. Perfect. I almost am nailing this And you guys Wait what did you do? Sorry I was trying to look at something else Chip stabbed him with a knife

No he just put a fake mustache on himself He just put a fake mustache on himself Yeah I just put a mustache on myself I'm so sorry That's really funny And we all love that and we're all having fun Yeah, I just put a mustache on myself. Okay. I'm so sorry. That's really funny. And we all love that. And we're all having fun.

She just told me her name. Wow. What is it? What is it? Waleed? The tree's name is Waleed? Yep. Yep. It's a beautiful name it looks like uh as if roz from monsters inc could kill four people without even getting out of breath so like the monster from monsters university at the library oh i haven't seen this.

It's this. Really? Oh, that's so cool. Oh my God. Oh, you know what? I have seen this. That's hysterical. I have seen this and I have stolen this and I forgot. That's so funny.

Yeah, it's this thing. Yeah. Yeah. Fun. So look up Monsters University Librarian. What's that? Oh, my apologies. I was just lost in thought. I had forgotten what their laughter sounded like.

Seems so strange to hear this group so joyful. Sometimes I still feel like I can hear Elizabeth in the walls. Anyway, I'm quite tired. Would you mind please going to bed now? Well, all right, I can do one more chapter, but this is the last one of them. This next bit is actually from the conversation the group had before this episode. Most of it was cut out for time, but I decided to include it for posterity's sake. Most of it was cut out for time, but I decided to include it for posterity's sake.

Before we hit record, y'all started talking about a D&D campaign involving children, question mark, and we screamed save it for the pod. So I do want to know what the details on that are. I do want to know what the details on that are. Well, okay. I don't know. It was definitely interesting, but Jeff ran it, and it was like, truly, was it 10 kids or nine kids? It was too many kids. Oh, my God. Jeff.

It was like- What a nightmare. I didn't even pick the kids. They kept coming. I don't know these kids. I honestly should share some photos with you guys, just like obviously not going to share it for distribution. Jeff's crying in the pictures.

He's yelling at kids. It was truly so cute. I mean, the kids were full of energy. I think the hardest part a little bit was the parents that brought them sometimes. In what way? They got involved. Is this for real? Well, it was like a helicopter DMing. Bar this for real like well it was like

there was one time where we went to a bar not even thinking about like the pub the inn this wasn't like one time it was like the first

the first time yeah that happened and go ahead with the story because it was so funny Jeff we go into the bar and I'm just trying to get them to go to a meeting room to get some info

and they're all like I want to order a beer and they're all just literally every kid is trying to order a beer. And they're literally, every kid is trying to order a beer. But they don't have beer there. Do they? No,

they don't. Right. Because like, it was just so funny because each kid was trying to ask for a beer in a different way. Yeah. And, and Jeff would be like, there's no beer at this distribution center.

And then they like change the way they asked it. And it was like all 10 of them were trying. Finally, the parent was just like, okay, why are these kids fixated on beer? It's just hot chocolate. And it's just like, I don't know. It was kind of lame. I mean, I'm not a 10 year old.

But it was like, that was like frustrating. Wow. It sounds like those kids really get D&D, which is ruining the life of your DM. That's the point. So they get it. I mean, honestly, they were nailed. The first time I played just with Joe, Peter, and the kids, they killed the bartender.

The bartender was literally just like, we're closing up. Go outside. Not today, bartender. Yeah, it was just so cute. And a lot of people didn't like we basically invited any kid that dressed up as some kind of harry potter character the halloween before at school and just kind of like you know the big readers in class and stuff and one of the couple one this is like so this is hot gossip from the classroom but two of the couple, this is like so, this is hot gossip from the classroom. But two of the kids were like dating. But which meant nothing. Like it was like you would not know the difference.

But one of the kids brought the other one. Like he filled out her character sheet. Like the first day they were just doing characters. And he was like, I filled out your character sheet. And she literally didn't even glance at it. I think the next week he's like, you can use that as an NPC if you want. I'm like, oh, thanks, man.

I also did a look at it. I saw it with Aaron when we started this show. Yes, exactly. I've never glanced at my sheet. I don't even know what D&D is. I had Aaron playing a cleric named Rapunzel. It didn't stick.

And then one kid was just like, he was into it, but he never really got too creative. So every single move, he'd be like, I'm just gonna go with my classic. Hit him with a hammer every move

yeah another kid that only wanted to farm like he's like is there a farm can I plant some potatoes okay that kid I love I just remembered that there's 10 of them there's 10 of them they all have their own

wants like I want to plant potatoes. I'm too old. I'm going to go to sleep. One was a baby that was just a baby. Jeff's meeting with them all separately over Zoom after their homework's finished. 20 hours a week. That's incredible.

That was incredible. Regis is such a funny name. Oh my God. Every time you say it I die why is that name so good I don't know it was the name of my kid's imaginary friend when he was three and it's so funny that's perfect

and then Regis had a sister and I was like what's Regis' sister's name and he was like Regis love is not transactional you don't have to earn I was like, what's Regis' sister's name? And he was like, Regis. Love is not transactional. You don't have to earn their love. They're your parents. They should just love you, Beef, the way that we just love you.

Oh. Hey, and Seb's back. I am back in. I met a dog while I was outside. Thank you, Seb. Yes. That kind of hangs in the air, almost like you did a double pits to chesty of axe body spray right in that spot of of cinnamon the double pits to chesty i'm gonna say that's the second time yet you've said that on this show at least it's one of my favorite things and i don't know what

i don't know what it means i don't know what it means where you spray it so you double pit spray your pits, and then you spray your chest. Yeah, it was from the Axe commercials, right? I thought it was a jump. I thought you were jumping, and you put your knees up your armpits. No, it's supposed to sound like it's a jump.

Like it's like a cool BMX thing. Everyone who's listening, just Google it. I don't know how. Yeah, we can't. We're stuck in this podcast. Oh, D12. I don't think I've Yeah, we can't. We're stuck in this podcast. Oh, D12. I don't think I've ever rolled one of these. Give it a shot.

Okay. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. No. No. It communicates to you. In rap. In rap. In rap. And it puts on the hunting hat sideways.

So 20 minutes later. These babies. Hold on, there's a big car. You want to go look at it? I do. It sounded so big, but it was just a truck. Hold on, I want to go see this big car. Big car, hold on.

I'm going to ask him to honk the horn for me. I'd rip open the window. I'd actually love that. Everyone's allowed to do that from now on. I think that should do it for tonight. The guest bedroom is made up

if you'd like to... Hush now. The patrols are becoming more and more frequent as of late. I don't know if you've heard, but some fool was deft enough to break into Lord Manzoor's castle last ten day. Made away with some

orb of darkness or a crystal helm or some other didgeridoo. Not sure what the interloper was hoping to prove with such a brazen act. All it accomplished was making the lives of us plain folk harder. I've had braid monks darkening my doorstep for inspection every morning since, as if I had anything against the Great One. I mean, heck, I used to know him when he still went by Waleed. Would it kill those renegades to maybe do a little thinking before they, hey, hey, put that down. That's not for you to.

I think at some point in like a year and a half, two years, we have to do an episode that Jordan just replaces Ben in and we don't acknowledge it. There's going to be a time where Ben can't make it. We call Jordan. It would be my honor to be your understudy. You need to explain yourself the truth of who you are and why you just tried to do that right now. And she backs off so you can speak. Wait, did you say you penetrated her neck?

No. Oh, you just put a bolt into her neck. No, oh, she like, so, maybe I should clarify that. She put it against, like the equivalent of someone either resting a blade against your throat or a gun to your head before. I thought the same thing, Jordan.

A threatening. OK, yeah, I thought I was passing. I thought she was really shot to the throat. That would have been shocking. I can give her Barak inspiration. I believe it's Barak. inspiration. Bardic inspiration. I believe it's barric. Fuck.

You got this. Take it from the top. You're so close every time. Bardic inspiration. I think in 2015, I spent more nights in a tent at a music festival than I did under a roof. Oh my gosh. Cool. Wow. Hurrah. We're also impressed, Sean. Oh my gosh, cool. Wow.

We're also impressed, Sean. Cut that, cut that. No, don't go, we're keeping it. Keep it, keep it and make it loud. Then make it really loud. Make it really loud. My acrobatics is pretty good, actually. Let's go!

Oh God! actually. Let's go. Oh, God. Alyssa just rolled a die and missed everything. How did that happen? I'm like in front of a whole desk and I missed it. Excuse me, sir, sir, sir.

I thought you died. Me too. Hold on one second. And I go around the corner and I throw a dummy out into a pit of lions. They were there for the show. What are you talking about? They were there for the show. Yeah, that happens.

A dummy gets thrown to lions. Hey, Sean, let me roll for it. No, it happens. I thought we agreed to let Ben do whatever he wants. I rolled a 16. In the contract, we signed. It's like, oh, right. And then whoever saw it happen believes it. Just all right.

Stop! He wasn't looking. Not again! Then from bottom frame, I come up, and I'm wearing two pairs of thick frame glasses. That's quite enough now. I mean, really, you can't go around taking things from other people's homes without permission. Has everyone in this whole swamp gone entirely mad?

Here, take your suspiciously heavy satchel and get out! What the... What in Lord Manzur's name is that? It can't be. You're the one they've spoken of. You're the... Now hold on just one second. There's no need to make this any worse than it is. I opened my home to you, remember? I bear you no ill will. If you leave now, I won't report you. I can live my quiet life and you can go die! Die!

Die! I'm fighting a sneeze. Don't fight it. And Waleed's coughing. We're falling apart. I'm farting! I'm sorry if I have to step a step off mike or if i literally sit down when i start coughing just so i don't hurt my back oh my god how old are you are you 84 oh this poor man willie's recording this in a hospice bed. He's getting older and older by the minute. We have to finish this.

Right in that moment, Seb and the monkey are rolling on the ground fighting each other. And I'm going, help me! Help! Help! They're both yelling help. They're both yelling help.

So me fighting the monkey did no distraction at all um it sounded like you just decided to be fighting with a monkey i was i think in my mind i was doing it to help but i probably could have communicated that better i think it's also fair to say that that's something that seb would just do whether or not it was helpful. And is he like hot? I mean, are you into that kind of thing? Yeah. Can I roll for hotness? Yeah.

Yeah, roll for hotness. Or attraction. Roll for attraction. Yeah, can we all roll for attraction? Yeah, we'd all like to roll for attraction. What are we doing? Rolling for attraction. I got 18. I got a 16.

I got 13, which it feels like a 13. I got a 15. I mean, you're all pretty attractive. You're all awesome. She's bored by this role. I got 15. I could have told you that. I got you this.

And it's this rectangular wrapped gift. And I hand it to Chalice. Is it a coupon for sex um no i if that's what you want that might be better than this okay sorry no it's yeah i'll i'll put that on your gift list for the future though that's a good idea uh-oh little jennify poo is hexed up a storm let me try that one. Uh-oh. Little Genefie Poo is hexed up a storm. Let me try that one again. Uh-oh.

Put that at the end of the episode. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you're editing this one. A little more pizzazz. A little more like, yeah, like a little more. You acted like someone else

wrote that for you. Oh, I really wanted it to be good. And you really didn't want to say it. As soon as I started, I went, I really wanted it to be good. And you really didn't want to say it. As soon as I started, I went, what are you doing, Ben? And you ice an elevator. That should help a good deal with these mild curses.

And of course, the biggest thing will be tiny. Ice an elevator? I missed. What does that mean? Yeah. So elevate her and ice. Elevate her. I thought you said ice and elevator. I don't know

what the fuck that is. That sounds like a teen book series. It's like sci-fi fantasy. It's like ice or hot elevator. I'm team elevator. Oh yeah, same. Big time. We have a cat this season.

What is its name? We do have a cat. Whoever remembers its name, I will Venmo you 10 real life dollars. Oh, my God. There's no way I remember. Did we give it a name? If anyone remembers if we even named it,

I will give you 10 real life dollars. Are we that irresponsible that we would beg, beg for a cat earlier this season, not take care of it, not talk about it and not name it? I think so. Bottoms up, gang. We would do that?

I don't believe that. Well, I just looked it up on the Discord. You did? Oh, what is it? The cat's name is Mittens, apparently. That can't be right. Oh, this might be... No, they're talking about somebody else's cat.

Never mind. I feel like we would have been hilarious. Get her. Oh, what if she doesn't do the piggy bank thing? That's actually... We could retro actively do that and then then we can keep all the breaking stuff too late jennifer sucks and already smashed the bank didn't even let me talk to it and that is has happened and i'm not gonna let you know i'm not gonna let you you did that you didn't even let me say something nice to it. This is what Jennifer does. Leave this in.

I think he's being fair. That's what Jennifer did. That was your choice. That's fair. That's who Jennifer is. Didn't even let me say goodbye. Not as old as I look, you fuck. Utilizing Andrew's gambit, I see.

Well, it'll take more than that for you to... Welcome back to Sitcom D&D, a real play Dungeons and Daggeragons. Damn it. I was trying to recover it. You said Dungeons and Daddies. Daggons. Damn it. I was trying to recover it. You said Dungeons and Daddies. Daggins. Adventure. Sorry, just making the sounds of adventure.

We can actually cut that one. Yeah, we can go ahead and cut that one. Absolutely not. I like this guy. That's not going anywhere. I thought that was still so high. Seb, you okay, man? Oh, man. I feel high all of a sudden.

Lead the way. She'll be fine. She honestly finds us. She's like a man wandering around. I'm sorry. You know, like a man wandering. I wanted to say something else, but then I was like, that doesn't make any sense.

But that's crazy because that's beef. Right before he drops all the food, he goes, this is the part where the slop falls down. And he lets the slop fall into your bowls. We just got slopped. i feel like that's a reference but i don't it is a reference we just got slopped not not that beef that's nothing it's something to me, okay? Chip, are you sleepy? Yeah, I'm sleepy

and definitely not after you guys go to sleep will I be searching for how to have sex with the ship or anything. Well, if you find anything, let us know. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Beef, you want to search for how to have sex with the ship with me? Absolutely, man. I mean, this is clearly the main point of this mission right isn't this the entire this is the episode pretty clear what the a plot is okay and it's just shaking the entire boat it's just the sensation that you're having because it is pitch black around the boat and it's kind of like when you play that game when you're on a little raft or inflatable

in a pool and all the other kids are trying to get you off by shaking it and hitting it and trying to flip it from underneath. It's like that, but just... Sean, are you okay? But you hold on and you win the game. And you say, you can't get me off and we're

actually playing together. And this is the game that we agreed to. Don't worry, Sean. I've played that game too before. I've played it. As the bully. Well, yes, as the bully. Wait, to get our bearings, we're doing perception?

You have to see what you see. Yeah. My brain scrambled that. You just came at me, bro. I was like, wait, why are we doing deception? But that was my stupid. I got a 15. That was my stupid.

Such a fun way of saying that. Oh, pardon me. That was my stupid. That was my stupid. Now, is anybody else trying to do anything? No. How do I turn the rudder, though? Usually at the stern of the ship.

What is a rudder? The back. The back. Go to the back. No, no, no. Let me figure it out myself. I'm going to go to the back. There's far less blood than I thought there'd be. SIGHS SIGHS

SIGHS SIGHS SIGHS SIGHS SIGHS SIGHS SIGHS Huge thanks to George C. Owens, who played the future version of me, Sean. Thank you. Yes, it's just as chaotic as you'd imagine. Big ups to you kitchen rats who stuck with us up to this point. We couldn't do any of this without you. And cheers to all our family and our friends.