Small Town Murder - #84 - Sadistic Isn't Sexually Transmitted in Red Wing, Minnesota

Episode Date: September 5, 2018

This week, in Red Wing, Minnesota, a relationship that was clearly doomed from the start, deteriorates quickly, and with violent results. What caused this escalation? Jealousy? Unkind Words? Chlamydia? Either way, it's a crazy story that will make you angry... When it's not hilarious!! Along the way, we find out why Minnesota towns might seem more LGBTQ friendly than they actually may be, whether constant violence constitutes a legal pattern, and just how cold blooded you can be & still be considered "in the heat of passion"!! Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman New episodes every Thursday!!Please subscribe, rate, and review!Listen on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to podcasts!Head to shutupandgivememurder.com for all things Small Town Murder!For merchandise: crimeinsports.threadless.comCheck out James and Jimmie's other show: Crime in Sports Follow us on social media!Facebook: facebook.com/smalltownpodInstagram: instagram.com/smalltownmurderTwitter: twitter.com/MurderSmall Contact the show: [e-mail] See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Wondery Plus subscribers can listen to Small Town Murder early and ad-free right now. Join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. What if you married the love of your life and then stood by them as they developed 21 new identities? What would you do? This Is Actually Happening is a weekly podcast that features extraordinary true stories of life-changing events told by the people who lived them. Listen to the newest season of This Is Actually Happening on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. This week in Red Wing, Minnesota, a rocky relationship leads to anger, STDs, and cold-blooded murder. back to Small Town Murder.

Yay! Yay, indeed, Jimmy. Yay, indeed. My name is James Petrigallo. I'm here with my co-host. I'm Jimmy Wissman. Thank you, thank you, thank you again for joining us on another wild, rocky adventure known as a small town murder. It's going to be a wild one this week. Actually, this is a, this is a crazy episode. This is just a, wow. Just a, a bad person. It's one of these people where you're just like, yeah, we don't need that guy. I don't think like anywhere really we could do without him, but we'll get to all that. We'll get to all that. That intro was nuts.

That's just the tip of the iceberg, I'm telling you right now. Luck is going on. It's going to be a crazy one, guys. Strap in there. And if you enjoyed last week's episode up in Vermont, which was crazy, I hope you got on iTunes and gave us five stars and said whatever the hell you want, because it's not for our egos. Montpelier, we know.

Montpelier. Montpelier. Yeah, yeah. We said Montpel not for our egos. Montpelier, we know. Montpelier. Montpelier. Yeah, yeah, we said Montpelier. Yeah, Montpelier. I'll pronounce it wrong, too. That's the capital of Vermont. But anyway, that's that. But thank you if you did do that.

If not, please get on a tweet. I know, I know. Please go. Boy, I have the answer finally. And it's been a year of abuse, over a year of abuse. And I'm going to fucking lay into some shit tonight. Because just give me a minute here and we'll get to that. But iTunes reviews, we were saying Apple Podcasts, do that.

Get on there if you haven't done it yet. If you want to be a superstar, though, a hero of ours, one of our producers, you can do that very easily by going to patreon.com slash crime in sports. You can donate there or go over to PayPal and use our email address, which is crime in sports at gmail.com. You can make a one time donation there or just head over to shut up and give me murder.com for everything. You could the links are to the to donator there. The links to all the merches, their T-shirts. There's new T-shirts up there.

There is. Super cool. One that's panhandle behavior with the element. Elephant. Really cool looking, the element of PB. Right. Panhandle behavior. It's the element that makes a great story.

It's awesome. So that's a lot of fun. We have that. And also, links to all of the live shows. The tickets to the live shows. Please get out there and buy your tickets to these live shows start this off right yeah houston and dallas october what is it fifth and sixth yeah let's kick it off right with those yeah i think we go to portland and seattle say the guests get the

guest and yeah what the hell is mandy malone yes i'm hanging out with mandy if you're a crime and sports listener you'll know who that is she was a crime and sports subject yeah who's really turned into kind of a like like what what could happen in a positive way for a was a crime and sports subject who's really turned into kind of like what could happen in a positive way for a crime and sports athlete. It's funny because out of 130 that we've done like two of them were like, you know, I really like this person. I kind of root for them.

Twice it's happened and she was one of them and actually things have worked out well for her. And she talks to us. Yeah, so she's very, very cool. She's willing to have a chat. Absolutely. So all that aside, check out the tour dates. We're coming near you, as we know.

Hopefully not too close to you, and that'll be gross. So we'll keep it in the general vicinity and all that. But we've got to get to the disclaimer, because that's very important right now. This is a comedy podcast, and we need to tell people that up front. It is a comedy podcast. We're comedians we're gonna make jokes uh the fact that it's a comedy podcast does not take away from the actual realness of the facts everything is real nothing's embellished for humor or for that's the best part that's it's all real and we just uh we try to find humor in small towns because we all have

are from some sort of shitty place and And so why not make fun of that? You know, if a police force let a murderer go for like 10 years, we're going to make fun of them for that. That's it. You know, a murderer, we'll make fun of them. What the hell? They're the biggest dick of the story. Always.

But what we try to do, and we always try to do, is we do not make jokes or we try not to make jokes at the expense of the victim or of the victim's family because we're assholes, but we're not scumbags. And that's the truth right there. So that's how we try to do it. So if you're on board, excellent. You're in the car. We're on the way to the liquor store.

You're guilty too, fucker. It's getting robbed. You're guilty. So no complaining from here on out. It's not that bad, we promise you. It's actually a good time. So let's get to it. I know what you're saying right now.

Please do. You got to shout it out from everywhere. Like we said, if you have some sort of corporate job, we get that. Go to a bathroom stall and quietly mumble it to yourself. Put your hand over your mouth. If you're in traffic, though, shout that shit out in your car. It's summer. Everybody's got their AC on.

Treat it like you're banging your boyfriend or girlfriend in the bedroom next to your parents. There you go. Cover your mouth and shout. Shut up and give me murder. It is time. Let's do do this let's go on a trip jimmy what do you say you ready to roll let's do this let's go on a trip we're going from vermont yeah which was weird and cold yeah to minnesota which is weird and cold so it's not that much of a and everyone it's very white and weird and cold so it's vermont minus maple it's true like we went i'm like geographically we went over a lot but really you know but minnesota though is kind of

more civilized vermont is its own it's almost its own country it's almost like texas of the north like in its own way it's just a weird place minnesota is vermont minus maple plus tons of sports yeah well vermont they like their hockey, I think, too. It's cold. Do they have a hockey team? They don't have a hockey team, though. Well, I mean, gee, they don't have any team. Their biggest city has 40,000 people in it. I'm sure they got minor league football.

I'm sure they got some horse shit up there. Oh, you know they do. Some poor bastards stationed up there. Because the land's cheap. Some shit from Boston. Rolled it out. They knocked a couple of maple trees down and put a field up. Some Red Sox team is there.

So we're going all the way to Minnesota. Like I said, it's Red Wing, Minnesota. I can't mispronounce this one. Let me tell you. It's Red Wing. There's no other way to pronounce that thing. And we're going to talk about that for a second. It's in the southeastern part of Minnesota.

The county that it's in is kind of on the Mississippi River. It's kind of near the Mississippi River, this town. What's east of Minnesota? The river and Wisconsin. Wisconsin. Yeah, there's a river, there's lakes, there's Wisconsin. There's all sorts of shit there. That's true.

Yeah, yeah. So all sorts of stuff there. No real panhandle present here. No? But panhandle behavior nonetheless. You bet. We're going to introduce this week because if you're a crime and sports listener also, and we don't mean to bring that up again, but you should be listening to it because

it's a goddamn funny show. You don't have to like sports. But anyway, that aside, what we have with that is kind of the same exact thing as panhandle behavior, and that's called junior behavior. And this episode's got junior behavior in it. So that is equal to panhandle behavior. It's the same thing. You could be dead set in the middle of Nebraska in a square, rectangular county in a rectangular state,

and it still could be a panhandle behavior if you're a junior. So that's how this works. Isn't the east side of Minnesota kind of like a panhandle-y? It shoots out a little. It's only because of the river, huh? It's like a foot kind of a thing, like a foot with a cast on it. It's because of the river, right? Yeah, the way it cuts there.

So that's where your borders are. It's about 45 minutes outside, 45 to an hour outside of Minneapolis. But it's to the south. We'll talk about... Minneapolis is down there? Well, it's in the middle of the, kind of the middle of the eastern part of the state there. I don't know geography. No.

It's about six hours to Chicago. So if you live there, you could drive to our live show in Chicago. About four and a half hours to Milwaukee. So you can get to all these places. Red Wing, it's connected by a bridge to Wisconsin that goes over the river. And it's about an hour

ten to Lino Lakes. You son of a bitch bastards. I got a message today. They just listened to that episode. And I just want to go, you know what? You, no. You late. I don't care.

If it's Lino or, it's not like it's, okay. It's Lino, God damn it. It's not like it's L-I-N-E dash O when I said it's Lino. No, it's L-I-N-O, which could be fucking Lino very easily. Could be Lino. It could be a lot of things. Maybe you're pronouncing it wrong. You don't understand, Minnesota.

And I say this with no fear because our show there already sold out. So fuck you people. I don't care. We already have your money. Don't show up. Don't care. We already have your money. We don't care.

If we insult you, whatever. It doesn't matter. No, we can't wait to see you in Minnesota. I dare you not to show up every last one of you. You're only showing up because we're coming in the winter and you guys will do anything inside in the winter you're like what is there heat okay we'll do it yeah that's fine i'll buy tickets it's fine you gotta get out of the fucking house it's dark at like 3 30 it's fuck i can't take this anymore i can't believe the wilds games are so packed i'd be like fuck you it's cold outside that's what it

is you can sell out anything in minnesota in december i swear to god we're gonna go there and just do a puppet show and it's going to sell out in January. No, I'm just kidding. But no other place we've got we've mispronounced names of towns of adjacent towns and once in a while the town we're doing because they can't find a news broadcast where they

mention the town's name because it's so small and insignificant and like nobody else complains more than once or twice except for Lionino lakes minnesota so i don't know what your pride in naming your fucking towns and lakes for that matter are but calm the shit down i've waited fucking 70 episodes to tell you that calm down you son of a bitches relax it's going to be cold in like a week fucking enjoy your lives for the love of God. Anyway. Amber and Chelsea who live up there that snap me quite frequently, they'll send me, because

they think it's fucking hysterical, they'll just send me a street sign and be like, pronounce this. And I'm like, go fuck yourselves. Yeah, who cares? It's Minnesota. No, I'm just kidding. We're really bashing on Minnesota. I'm not going to try.

And the funny thing is, too, I've been to Minneapolis. Probably the nicest people I've ever met in my life. They're Minnesota nice, man. God damn it. Don't mispronounce it. They're bringing a hot dish for us. They're probably. Whatever the fuck thing is, too, I've been to Minneapolis. Probably the nicest people I've ever met in my life. They're Minnesota nice, man. God damn it. Don't mispronounce it. They're bringing a hot dish for us. There is that probably. Whatever the fuck that is.

Well, if there's weed in it, then I'm into it. So, Goodhue County, this town lies in. Goodhue. Zip code 55066. Area code 651. It's a big town. 41 square miles. 34 of it's on land.

The rest is the river yeah so the river front that they sort of own they actually do have a town motto yeah this town wants you to come visit they're not fucking around desperate they have their shit no no they have their shit organized they have all these parades and festivals and really river this and river that everything on the river uh the motto of the town right on their website is quote come for a visit stay for a lifetime oh boy which is pretty close to a bunch of other mottos we've had before. So it's not that original. Could be a threat, could be we'll lock you up.

I prefer this motto that I found on a separate website that wasn't affiliated with them. Quote, come for a visit after September, leave immediately, which I think is more accurate. That's probably better. The actual the actual slogan sounds like sounds like the tagline for like Black Snake Moan. Yeah, I think that's a line in Hotel California. I believe I'm not sure. Come for a visit. We'll chain you to a radio. Yeah, it's going to happen. Come for a visit. Gnaw your ankle off. Gnaw your foot off at the ankle to escape. Yay. This is great. History of this place here. It was named after a Dakota Sioux chief.

I was going to say, this is going to be very Native American. Absolutely, named Red Wing. And the actual, that's the translated name. I'm not going to butcher these poor people's language and try to pronounce this name. But it means wing of the wild swan dyed red. So Red Wing. Wing of the wild swan that's dyed red that we punished and died we died it right and then we said look what we did right we fucking dominated

nature but we crushed down oh they'll dominate it there yeah they'll dominate that we sprayed it all over take that while we held it down and imagine the scene it made i don't think it took that peacefully it was squeaking trying to bite people with its beak. Meanwhile, there's hawks that are just as beautiful. Nature died in red. Yeah, well, good luck fucking dying in one of those red. You'd have to kill it first. It's already red.

You don't have to. I figure they picked a swan because it's a little more docile. It's a little more, yeah. You can probably get it in a headlock before it really attacks. Try that with shit with a hawk. You're going to get a chunk taken out of you. Pretty easy to headlock one of those. That's what I'm saying, yeah.

The Dakota chiefs used the name Red Wing. It came from their use of a dyed swan's wing as the symbol of their rank, I guess. I guess that was like stripes. Their stripes, I guess. This particular chief was an ally of the British soldiers

in the War of 1812, so a foresight on his part there. Didn't work out too well. This particular chief was an ally of the British soldiers in the War of 1812. Oh, that's awesome. A lot of foresight on his part there. Didn't work out too well. That's a daisy. He chose the wrong side. Nope, not good there. Every single battle we do, the Native Americans always pick the wrong side.

Well, maybe that's why they lost. That's why I feel bad. It's like, no. Every time I read it, it's like, no, you're doing no. Then this is going to happen and that's going to happen. Jesus Christ. You don't trust Jackson? What are you doing?

Then again, if you teamed up with the americans they would have just used them for their fighting and then taken their land and put them on so it doesn't matter either way they were fucked used them for their language in a war and then just cast them aside also yeah you know it you know it uh now uh during this guy's life i guess there wasn't a lot of uh there were only a couple of uh you know white people basically hanging out in Minnesota at that time coming through and they were mainly passing through this Red Wing had a he seemed to be

into the Americans like he liked the white people when they came in and he'd work with them and trade with them and you know did work with them when they came through to you know get them through safely and tell them where to go yeah he liked to trade with them shit like that but then the federal government and you know, get them through safely and tell them where to go. Yeah, they like to trade with them, shit like that. But then the federal government, in their appreciation for all the help, established an Indian reservation in 1889 along the Mississippi River,

quote, to free up land for new settlers. Translation, to steal people's land so we can move in there. Thanks for your help. Enjoy the river. That's, wow. I mean, that's, at least they got the, I'm sure they moved them away from the river once they realized that was valuable. And they're like, oh, wait, wait, no, you can't go in there. Thanks for your help. Enjoy the river. That's, wow. I mean, that's, at least they got there. I'm sure they moved them away from the river once they realized that was valuable. And they're like, oh, wait, wait, no, you can't go down there. That is the Mighty Miss sip.

We will take that, too. There's got to be a flat, dry area where we can stick you guys, I'm sure. Yeah, right out there. That'll work. You see where all the wheat's dead? Just stay there. See where the wheat's dead? That's yours now.

And we killed all the buffalo? We need that. Oh, yeah, no, you can't have those at all. But, I mean, there's deer, I think. They come through once in a while. But don't go past there. If they run through, then they're done. Then it's ours. Once they're into the woods, that's our territory at that point. So, sorry. I guess the city of Red Wing developed around this community. In the 1850s, they had Mississippi River steamboats. So, people came up there and they would find Red Wing and hang out and farm there. And I guess this is decent farm territory up there. Of course, all these people would then encroach on the native people's land because what the fuck?

And so they'd get pushed away. They ended up, of course, they planted wheat because that's what white people do. Get there, steal your land and plant wheat on it. Like, we need this for wheat. Sorry. It looks beautiful. Yeah, we do. It all looks like dead grass.

And who knew that these people, while they were brutalizing people to steal their land to plant wheat, that 200 years from then, half the children in America would not touch anything with that product anywhere fucking near. That would be poison. That would be poison to all of their ancestors. All of them. That is hilarious. I wonder if any Native Americans are allergic to gluten. I just wonder. Probably not. They're probably fine.

They're like, we're fine with that fucking gluten. We've been doing this for centuries. Apparently when you plant it, it gets in your bloodstream and shit happens. I don't know. Maybe it's that pigment in your skin wheat has fucked so much rather lack of the dust bowl is because of wheat that happened because of people were like well we got to plant more wheat like that's how stupid wheat is and now everyone's allergic to it which they're not really allergic to it i don't think but it's a good excuse anyway somebody does a save your tweets of i, I know you are. I know.

I know. You went to a doctor and they told you. We get it. We understand. Enjoy. You went to a doctor who told you that he's paid by somebody else. Who knows? Who benefits from you not eating wheat?

We can't judge the wheat conspiracy. We're not judging big wheat. We don't know. I'm sure I'm allergic to it and I don't care. There's big wheat. I'm sure there's big oat out there. You got We're not judging big wheat. We don't know. I'm sure I'm allergic to it, and I don't care. There's big wheat. I'm sure there's big oat out there. You got to look out for big oat, boy. And Cheerios, they come right after.

Big barley. Big barley. When they're coming for you, boy. Big oat and big barley. That's a... In the 1800s, that was probably a thing. Yeah. Hey, man, big oat's pissed.

You're like, no shit, really? Fuck, the oat conglomerate's mad at us? We got to fix that. I feel like the mafia being pissed off can you imagine oats like horses being allergic to oats yeah then then everything's fucked everything cows are allergic to corn yeah grass obviously it's it's snowing in the summer it's fucking raining in the winter cats and dogs living together in harmony it's bedlam it's chaos dogs living together in harmony it's bedlam it's chaos it's raining in the winter it was a ghostbusters sermon there but anyway uh wheat i guess would pay for everything they they they

would clear for wheat and they would actually make money on it every year so see the back of our penny for fuck's sake yeah that's true they were very into wheat and In 1873, Red Wing led the country in the amount of wheat sold by farmers. Wow. The warehouses in the port of Red Wing could store and export more than a million bushels of wheat. How much is in a bushel? I have no fucking idea how much a million bushels is. They could have said that in pounds or kilograms or something. We could relate to just a tassel at the end of a stick.

Is that the only time I've ever seen a bushel of wheat is when it's like three pieces or is it like a shitload of it packed together like a bushel of whatever is it like a bale of hay that kind of a bushel it could be a lot seems like a lot of wheat probably i assume it's not just like a shed with some wheat in it probably it's probably a lot of wheat so uh then they the railroads came once the railroads came then uh then things started to pick up obviously as they always do the uh the aurora ski club in red wing was founded in 1887 it was one of the first ski clubs in north america yeah and uh all the scandinavian immigrants in the area were dominating that ship i'm sure like seriously the the uh the members became they had their own ski style called

red wing style that apparently like this was in the 1800s, apparently lasted into the 1900s even as a style of skiing that they fucking developed on their own. And the first douche is born. The first douche is born. And some of them were, the first American ski jumping record was set by a Norwegian immigrant named- Buffy? This douche.

No. Mikgel Hemmestvit. Okay. Soist so yeah i'm sure that's mikhail m-i-k-k-j-e-l who gives a fuck that's what i mean i don't want to i don't want to know how to pronounce that i will instantly be douchey just by knowing that yeah i don't even need to know it if i pronounced it right i apologize I apologize. And he's probably the heir to Swiss Miss. Something. Yeah, he owns that little girl and her marshmallows. He owns that little girl, Jimmy. This guy had a 37-foot flight, and that was the record, which I'm sure is nothing now.

The guys go, like, I don't know how far, but really far. 3,700 feet? It's really far. Like a quarter of a mile. It seems like New York to Boston, basically. They're flying. I don't know how far, but really far. 3,700 feet? It's really far. Like a quarter of a mile. It seems like New York to Boston, basically. They're flying. I don't know when they go fly. I don't know.

It's really like a commuter flight. 37 feet. It's 37 feet. These guys fall that far. Yeah, they were like high-fiving each other awkwardly because they're Norwegian and they don't know how to do it, and it was all fucked up. They're the whitest of the white. Yeah, you know that happened there.

don't know how to do it and it was all fucked up they're the whitest of the white yeah you know that happened there uh some of the industries here uh first of all also the immigrants were german german irish norwegian and swedish so christ white white white and whiter this is the whitest fucking people they could find this is amazing yeah they had industries were tanning shoemaking oh i got it yeah tanning leather yeah not getting tanner that would be a bad industry for swedes and norwegians they wouldn't work out very well they get fired by lunch you're like look at you you're bright red you're terrible at this the fuck out of here who hired fucking sven over here who hired this guy sven's terrible he's fucking shit candy he's gone i just saw a bunch of super white people laying in

tanning being like this is an industry to have tan white people that's that's an industry they began what jersey now perfect that's exactly right that's exactly right jesus christ what the fuck am i doing i don't know i don't know what i'm doing unbelievable so uh i guess while uh they also had uh bricks barrels boats furniture pottery and buttons yeah uh they made beer and lumber they did stone cutting a lot of shit was going on in there it was a very it was bubbling this whole place it's very ski resort centered too i'm like it is rich people shit it's that's kind of like that here are finer things in life sort of yeah but also shit that you need you know what i mean back then pottery and you

needed that shit i picture all this stuff being like the fancy it was yeah it's probably just who knows it could be low end it could be like fucking ikea shit there we got to put it together just making parts of those things it is that center part of the world we don't know how good those buttons were they could have been terrible. Pop right off your shirt. Don't hold the... Well, that's all the installation. Yeah, I was going to say,

I don't really know how a button could be, but as long as it's circular... As long as it's solid and circled. ...and holds its shape, I think you're good there. And fits through the hole on the other end. That's a problem when that doesn't work. You've got to get a pair of scissors out

and try to make it work. Try to cut the hole bigger. I got that in a pair of jeans one time. I'm like, what are you fucking kidding me this isn't working how am i gonna get this through and it's button fly there's fucking six of these never mind my cock is gonna hang out all the time i don't even care yeah i did the buttons are too small sorry i don't know to tell you officer they're too small you try and button it and hold your arms up i'm sorry the dick's bigger than the button go ahead button it so they had the red wing I'm sorry the dick's bigger than the button. Go ahead, button it. So they had the Red Wing Potteries.

This was a company founded in 1878 and was apparently a big source of employment in this place. It was a popular pottery company. I don't know what the fuck they made pottery. Then I guess the pottery barn came in, wiped them out. Well, the factory closed in 1967. Okay. Wasn't that great closed in 1967. Okay. So that kind of put...

Wasn't that great? Apparently it wasn't. It was good for a while, and then it wasn't. They built a Prairie Island nuclear plant in 73. Or maybe those parts just kept reminding them, by the way, we stole this from Native Americans. That's true. And now we're using the shit that they make,

and we're creating that also. We'll do that. They also make Red Wing shoes there, I guess. Is that what it's from? Yeah, they're from there. creating that also. We'll do that. They also make Red Wing shoes there. Is that what it's from? They're from there. They manufacture them there. They make Riedel ice and roller skates, which you know they're going to make something for fucking hockey there. There's a casino

there, Treasure Island Resort and Casino operated by the Native Americans there. They have sister cities, Ikata, Japan, Kyushu, China. I'm not pronouncing that right in china in china there's a sister city yeah and two of them in asia and then uh kongsberg norway because they really need to connect with the white people and make it whiter can you tell me what a sister city is because i have no we've talked about i have no clue they how does a sister city get to be in a different country they each have a sign in each

other's city though that's all this because scottsdale i've seen has a sister city of some other horse shit yeah like someone in europe or something they all do that it's some publicity shit i don't know stupid i have a resident review of this town which are always my favorite uh this review and there's a lot of reviews of this town a lot of back and forth like the likes and dislikes of the comments on it were like more than I've ever seen. Usually it's like two. This was like 75 likes. 35 don't like it.

I'm like to dispute the review. Yeah, this is a fuck. This one basically encapsulates pretty much what most people say. Quote, very stagnant in town is the title of it. Red Wing is a pretty town along the river. It does have some nice things outsiders need to be aware of if you take the plunge. The town is old, capital letters, as in the citizens.

If you're looking for a 20- to 30-year-old youthful vibe, you'll find nothing like that in Red Wing. Sure, there is the Sheridan Theater, a movie theater. That's your culture. The mall, if you can call it that, has about a dozen stores. It's pretty sad. And finally, the jobs. No jobs. As the manufacturing has dried up pretty sad. And finally, the jobs. No jobs.

As the manufacturing has dried up in Red Wing, so have the jobs. No more Jostens, Pirelli, Tannery. Even Red Wing Shoe has had some tough times. I'm sure Walmart is hiring, but hard to raise a family on that. If you're a skilled worker planning on commuting an hour north every day for a real job, maybe. So, yeah. That guy, that was clearly a dude. I mean, the first thing out of the gate was couldn't get laid you know yeah if you're looking for chicks not gonna

fucking happen they are old as fuck and then he how skilled is he that he can make a tire for pirelli he doesn't make a ring for justin he's apparently this guy is fucking well-rounded he knows what he's doing you could be the ceo of fucking walmart. Yeah, this guy, I think he's wasting his time, really. He needs to go somewhere else. I think this guy, you know what you need to do? Take yourself to New York City. Take your pretty little self to Broadway, and you show us what you got. You let it all hang out, sister.

You'll find it there, sir. That's right. All of it. People in this town, population 16,445. So mid-sized little small town up 9% since 1990 that's kind

it's had this just kind of steady climb of population since the 1850 like no boom no bust just you know

a couple thousand more every five years I guess there's people being born and the old people never die I'm blown away somebody created

a shoe factory here and then named it Red Wing and I didn't even know there was a town that's I've's those shoes since I was a commercial. There's commercials for them and shit. The best work boot on the planet. Apparently.

So that's what they tell me. Anyway, median age in this town is about five years higher than the normal median age. It's forty two point eight here. So it's an older town. Male female population is exactly normal. Few more females and males pop married populations right about there too most of the stats are pretty pretty normal like everything is in the range of uh of average except for married no children which is higher than normal which is usually old people yeah that's usually their their thing they are old that guy was right

they're old yeah there's the the stats tell a story of old in this town, is what I'm saying. Race in this town, 90.30% white. That's a lot of white. So pretty fucking white. 1.89% black. Probably a few members of the Twins, possibly the Timberwolves maybe live out there.

I don't know who else lives in Minnesota. The majority of the Timberwolves are white fucking dudes. That's true. They're European guys and shit uh 0.48 asian uh point to two and a half percent native american which is very high for normal regular uh 3.64 percent hispanic so it's pretty fucking white is basically it's 66 of people here are religious wow so busting out the religion in this town not a lot of baptists though we. We're in the north, obviously. Lutheran.

This is Lutheran territory. This is reminding me of Drop Dead Gorgeous a lot, obviously, where everything was the Lutheran this and the women's Lutheran gun club and all that shit. So that makes a lot of sense. I see Kirstie Alley with her fucking obnoxious accent. God, I love that movie. One of the only people on Twitter that has me blocked. To Kirstie Alley? Well, I'm sure you said something she deserved. I did.

She's a pain in the ass. Something Scientology based, I hope. It was. If you're going to get blocked, do it for the right reasons. I hope it was science. You didn't call her fat, did you, Jimmy? I went super hacky. Oh, come on, Jimmy.

That's fucking weak. She's a Scientologist. Yeah, I know. She could have a horn coming out of her head and that would be the second weirdest thing about her the first being scientology if you're a scientologist i don't apologize you're insane i think it was something about uh fat tuesday landing on national women's day and i said it just reminded me that kirstie allen's a cunt oh god well actually i said she is a she is a bad person though she said some horrible things about people if they don't like scientology and shit like that she's a terrible person she's

been a not a good person but i'm sure some people like her so we'll get off that her and john travolta yeah that's exactly uh 1.1 percent lds in this town uh zero is 0.0 percent jewish how do you have so 16 and a half500 people and no Jewish people? That's insane. I'm sorry. The Lutherans get rid of them. Yeah. I feel like I'm from New York.

That blows me away that there's no Jewish people there. And 0.0% Islam, obviously, also, because it's Minnesota. About 47% Democrat, 50% Republican here. So Minnesota's a blue state, too. They go independent. They elected Jesse Ventura, fucking governor. What too. So that's a they go independent. They go. They elected Jesse Ventura fucking governor. So it's a weird place. Unemployment

rates actually low here. It's about 4%. So lower, but so is the household income, which is about $48,000, which is 5,000 less than the below the normal there. When we look at this, the overall the cost of living here is actually lower than normal.

$100,000 is normal, whatever par. You can raise a family. Yeah, it's $92,000. Wait till you hear the housing. $92,000 is the overall cost of living. Housing is $75,000. How about that? Which isn't too shabby at all.

It's $183,400 is the median home cost. Minnesota's a great place to live. Not bad under there. The houses here, a lot of houses between $100,000 and $200,000, over 50% of the houses. And if we've convinced you that you want to freeze your ass off and come see us in December there, well, your tickets are sold out, but come to the puppet show in January. If we've convinced you, then we have for you the Red Wing Minnesota Real Estate Report. I found a two-bedroom house, apartment, whatever.

Your average rental of a two-bedroom is about $1170, which is below average, the country. I found houses here that were such good prices. I found a two-bedroom, one-bath, 936-square-foot house. It's a small little house. It says it has a three-season wood stove. I don't know what a three-season wood stove is. Which season doesn't it work in? I don't know which one. Summer it's not for.

You don't need it then. It says, quote, ready for your updates. So I feel like it needs some work. You can get it to the fourth season. But $125,000 for this, so that's not bad. I found a three-bedroom, two-bath, 1,575-square-foot house. It's like a little outdated, but you could live in it. It's not terrible.

$110,000. Yeah. That's insanely reasonable. You could put a family in that. I just understood why the fourth season doesn't work. It's hot. It's a heating stove, not a cooking stove. Not a cooking stove.

Yeah, there you go. Only, why are they starving for a season? Just that we're going to starve, man. We're using the microwave. We're hibernating. We're having two-minute pizza pockets. Found a six-bedroom, three-bath, 3,561-square-foot place. Holy shit.

259,125,000. It's nice. It's gorgeous, this place. For almost 4,000 square feet, 125,000. It's nice. It's gorgeous. This place for almost 4,000 square feet, still under 300 grand. I found beautiful homes. That's that. Things to do. River City Days is their big thing. River City Days is a big festival. They said they have a wide variety of entertainment options. They have crowd favorites such as the fabulous Armadillos coming, which I have no idea what that is. I hope that's a band of actual armadillos performing circus tricks. That would be fucking awesome.

I want it to be unbelievably homosexual, man. Oh, that'd be even better. We're the Fabulous Armadillos, everybody. We're fabulous as fuck. We're going to walk the river and you're going to fucking love it. And they just strut and they're like, I don't know what's going on here. Watch us all ball up. I think the gays are here, but they ain't bothering nobody.ut and they're like i don't know what's going on here i just saw a ball up i think the gays are here but they ain't bothering nobody minnesota they're so nice

they'd be like they don't seem to be bothering anybody and they just let it go because that's they're not that bad you know they call them armadillos they can be nice to them which would be good uh they said come down to the big entertainment tent which is oh baby uh highlights are the tacos and tiaras event on th on Thursdays, Pickleball Games, which will cost $5 a person to enter, and the Polka Dots are playing, which is an old-timey polka band on Friday. Clever. Clever. Crime in this town.

This is the oldest shit ever. Yeah, this is for old people. This is definitely for old people. The Polka Dots are playing, everyone. The Senior Center Olympics. Besides the fabulous armadillos. I don't know if the old people are going to like them. They are not going to be happy.

They're going to be the highlight of the show, I'll tell you that much. Crime rate. This is weird. I don't see any Lutherans being uber progressive. No, probably not. But they're so passive aggressive, they won't actually say anything. They'll talk about it later. Like, not even in the car on the way home.

When they get home and get in their bedroom and lock the door and the kids are in bed, they'll discuss it. But they wouldn't be like, hey, get them gays out of here. They just look at them. Okay. I'm pretty sure them boys was gay. They'd offer them hot dish. You know, that's how it works. Crime rate, property crime is actually above average in this town, which is strange because violent crime, murder, rape, robbery, assault, the Mount Rushmore of crime is actually less than half the national average. Wow. It's almost like a third of the national average.

They won't rape you. So they won't rape or kill you. Apparently, they'll take your camera. They'll take. Oh, they'll steal your shit. Yeah. Lock your windows. Lock.

Roll them up. Lock them down. But other than that, you know, you're fine. Take dick fix and put it back. Yeah. Unless you unless you're a couple people here in this town, and then it's a different story. A couple other people we'll talk about who did have a problem with violent crime in this town.

First, let's talk about William J. And this last name, boy. A-U-C-H-A-M-P-A-C-H. What? Ockempock? Ochempock-H. What? Ochempach? Ochempach. Ochempach? Ochempach?

I think so. Junior. He's a fucking junior. Now, I said I'd explain this further. In crime and sports, we've had 130 episodes. Probably 90 to 100 of them have some junior connection. Either the athlete himself is a junior, which happens often so frequent or they have named their son something junior which happens also and that either way that i don't know what it is about

the ego of doing that uh makes it makes you an idiot and you end up doing things or maybe once you do that you set into motion some cosmic you know ball rolling down a hill that causes crime i have no idea influences something in the universe that creates just awful but it creates junior behavior and we always say that it is the exact same thing as panhandle behavior doesn't matter the race the location that none of that shit matters they could be jewish and from brooklyn and they could have panhandle behavior fucking junior behavior doesn't matter. So they wouldn't be Jewish from Red Wing, though, as we found out earlier.

But this William J. Ochempach Jr. We'll just call him William. Billy. Billy Jr. Let's call him. Let's just call him Junior. Junior here, he, talk about him, and he meets up with a woman named, I guess, Dailene. D-A-I-L-E-N-E.

Yep. Dailene, I'm going to say. Could be Dailene. Dailene or Dailene. Don't tweet me about it, Minnesota, but I'm going to go with Dailene. Is her last name Akinpah? Her last name is Count, which I know that. There's no other, unless it's Kayuntz or some shit like that.

Or the O's silent. If it's Cuntz, yeah, I don't, there's no other, unless it's Coyotes or some shit like that, or just if it's cunts. Yeah. I don't know what it is. Whatever. But we're going to call her counts and assume that's correct. Okay. Although the ground is always shifting under me in Minnesota.

She's born, both of them. That river is just eroding the bedrock of integrity from everybody. The fabulous Armadillo is like, the water's running up farther up the shore. Fellas, this way. Everybody run. Up the shore. Sorry. Like me. Put your hands out.

Yeah. Break your wrists out. And don't give me shit about the voice, okay? That doesn't have to be a gay guy. I know straight guys who talk like that. That's on you. Yeah. If you interpret that as a gay, that particular character that happens to be gay has that

voice. And you've never heard that voice before so shut up anyway moving on and it's fucking pretty good and you know it's not too fucking shabby it's less offensive if it's accurate that's what I've always found you know what I mean that's what it is

there's no arguing it what are you going to say that's not how I sound yes it is it's exactly not every obviously get your hands off your hips. Yeah. Sorry, but I don't give a fuck. I have zero whatever. I don't care, but I find that that's funny. Generally, the joke has to be funnier or more accurate than it is offensive.

That's what it is. And you've nailed both. There you go. So fuck it. So fuck it. This is the fabulous armadillos. What do you want from me? So they hook up.

They're both. We're going to go back to 1991. Let's go back in time when they meet. We're flying through time. I see flannel and shit like that. Kurt Cobain is still alive. We just found out that Milli Vanilli didn't sing. Oh, those bastards.

This was a tough time. Those bastards. Tough time for the country, 91. They fucked us over. Oh, boy. The economy was in the shitter in 91. 91 was a rough day. The Yankees were in last fucking place every year.

The worst music ever. Yeah. Young James was in a bad place at this point in time. Not good at all. The cult of personality surprised us all because we had a black lead. That was weird. In living color. Where did he come from?

Look at that. Good stuff. Very nice. That was weird. I heard it on the radio. I was like, this guy's great. They're like popular fishbone. Friendly, radio-friendly fishbone.

That's what I always called them when I was a kid. Anyway, they hook up. They're both about 21 years old at this point in time, so they're young people. They hook up with each other in 1991. In April of 1991, to be very specific, because we we need to be specific because in a two-year period so much crazy shit happens really that you need dates to keep it straight or else you don't know what the hell's going on but they immediately start a romantic relationship and both of them seem like they uh are a bit flighty in the romance department where they'll they dive into

relationships it seems like from the background I found on both of them that's what it seems like big flame it's not like a spark fizzle no it's it's you're either you don't like someone or you're in love with them and they're the person they're the one every time you know it's that person uh we all know those people uh but i mean by all accounts nothing daylene seems like a nice person everybody says and uh whatever ak and pak not so much we'll talk about him uh billy jr we'll talk about not not so much here uh now daylene also has some she she's got it she's got a rough go of it for a 21 year old yeah she's 21 years old she already has two children from previous marriage a three-year-old and a one-year-old from a previous marriage so she got pregnant young and

probably married the guy and then my mom essentially yeah and then was like what the fuck am i doing marrying this asshole i don't like him just because he knocked me up a couple of times doesn't mean that we're meant to be together because uh you know his sperm fertilizes something i that doesn't that doesn't make it fucking that we're a match made in heaven just because the biology works to this is screaming same z yeah it's what happens we've all been there i think i think uh half the children in the world probably have come from that so uh this but a three-year-old and one-year-old she has at the time they get together uh they move in together and then move out and then move in and move out

and they're very this relationship from the immediate from go is just a mess in terms of stability wise. There is no stability. I'm sure a lot of people's first marriage probably and second and possibly third. This is so far my mom's story. It's like Betty Lou Beats, except like Betty Lou Beats was like six times. This is like the same exact story. six times this is like the same exact story otherwise hey everybody just gonna take a quick break from the show to tell you a little bit about lisa mattresses lisa.com l-e-e-s-a lisa.com do you find yourself distracted and forgetting things

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And many more. I think that's us. Many more. So don't miss it. Weekdays on Podcast One or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Don't miss it. Weekdays on Podcast One or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Now, this seems like a relationship right away that, you know, it's not the most stable.

Like we've talked about, there's a lot of issues and, you know, he's not mature and she's got children to think about. And, you know, that's all she's thinking. And that's that's probably yeah she's all she probably has time for too but she's also dealing with this asshole and they live together on and off which means that there's kids come you know with people coming in and out and he's coming or she's moving or there's some instability in this for everybody uh then she becomes pregnant in september of 1991 same story yeah so it does not take her long six months fucking crazy sick well let's it doesn't end exactly the same i know because i know obviously i know the your mother's story she's doing great she's doing fantastic she's like the you know she does very well for herself and this this man's in a car dealership she's doing she's doing great like a nice cars too

not like a fucking hyundai or something not a caddy's's, dude. Yeah, not a Kia. No. So she becomes pregnant in September of 1991, which is, you know, you can tell that's going to be trouble right away. When you're only with someone five months and you're already moving in and out and all this shit. First of all, if you are moving in already after five months, that's... That's already a red flag. That's pretty quick. And then if you're moving in and out and in and out again after five months that's really out there if your stuff is moving in and out of their house more

than his dick is moving in and out of you if you then if your stuff has never been out of boxes for the last six months that's probably an issue and you should look at your life and check it out if you get ready for work out of a box that says work clothes yeah it's it's a problem that's an issue yeah red wing work work clothes here so that's something uh so uh she like i said she's pregnant and now there's a woman here that she this is when trouble starts uh right from the start i mean like we said we're five months into this relationship it's it's it's brand new basically if you six jeff foxworthy's uh spousal abuse jokes yeah it's kind of what we're dealing with here if your eyes match your black shoes you might be in a domestic violence relationship you might be in a panhandle if you you might be married to a junior if you've told people you've fallen downstairs when you haven't fallen

jeff actually is not funny either so don't worry about it it's better than anything fucking jeff foxworthy ever told don't it's all right jimmy that's literally better than any joke jeff foxworthy ever fucking told you nailed used stairs as an excuse for bruises and there are no stairs in your house. You might be a sad person that's actually recognizing this joke. Your wife might be as sad as a man whose career fucking took off. Yeah, well, fuck, he's got millions of dollars. Unlike Daylene, who's stuck with this jackass, this poor woman here. Dailene, who stuck with this jackass, this poor woman here.

There's a woman who Dailene, who Counts had stayed with a few times on and off through this whole thing. She would come and go as things would fall apart with this relationship. She says that she saw a slap mark on Dailene's face during the time that she was dating him and they were going in and out before she was pregnant she said that that counts told her that William Billy Jr. had slapped her in the face she said what happened to your face it looks like somebody slapped you and she said they fucking did fucking

Billy Jr. who the hell else do you think slapped me yeah that's nothing so far I mean that's he's this guy junior example of just exemplifying junior behavior here. Just just the pinnacle of it. January 4th of 1992. They have a pre-birth custody evaluation.

Yes, this is. So, well, there's legal trust. Well, we'll see. There's all sorts of legal interventions. And the kid's not even born yet, but they're figuring out when it pops out out who's taking it the fuck home, which I guess is better to figure out now rather than when it pops out and they have a fight over it in the maternity ward. Probably like that. I like that the courts are deciding and betting on this kid's going to survive this fucking pregnancy. That's the other thing.

Yeah. Who knows here? So during this counts tells the evaluator that william often slapped her and her two children that aren't even fucking his you shouldn't hit your own kids never mind other people's jesus christ uh he all she also says that billy jr there hit her while she was pregnant which she still is uh frequently ripped items off the wall and like threw them he's just rages he'll rip shit off the wall and throw it across the room and smash pictures and you know go off in a huge scary rages which is just what you want around your children you want unstable people who go into uncontrollable rages out of the clear blue

sky that's the best people to have around your kids meanwhile we've said it a lot that if you're in this relationship get out yeah as the lady yeah let's stop giving them the advice if you're the dude in this relationship dude you're a fucking piece of shit yeah i think we all know that we all know that and uh i think you can't be in a relationship i don't i don't think us telling them that is going to make it because the fact is that i think everything on earth is telling them that they're a piece of shit including the fact that they hide that they're beating their fucking woman up that's the thing most of the, they're not dragging them out in the middle of the street. It's not like that old thing where there was a law down south somewhere. This was a true thing in the town.

The rule of thumb? No, where you were allowed to slap your wife. As long as you did it in front of the... As long as you did it on the courthouse steps. Wow. So this was like a real rule. You could take your wife to the courthouse steps and you could slap her there because then you're under scrutiny.

Then it's like, why are you hitting your wife? And then when you have to have a pretty good fucking reason for it or else everybody thinks you're an asshole. Or it's like she can't go accusing you of doing extra things. We watched what he did. It has to be like a weird, which is the weirdest, craziest shit in the world. But people have no fucking shame. the world but people have no fucking shame this guy by the way has no uh no moral compass no thought of there's nothing to this guy that makes him a fucking human being so if there are people

that can be reached maybe but when we're dealing with people like this i'll say yeah this guy's a jerk get out like he's evil this motherfucker like and normally we hide it and we fucking we hide who's evil and shit like that he's the evil one i'll tell you now spoiler alert he's an asshole the guy beating the shit out of his pregnant wife well you never know girlfriend some and some of them maybe she killed him you know who the fuck knows and that could happen here but he's definitely the asshole we don't the kids stepped up like enough of that would be great i would love that story i'm gonna find a story like that i wish i would have it. A child who murders for good reason.

So Counts also tells this woman that Billy Jr. here became more abusive with her once she became pregnant. So that's nice. He was abusive, but then once she came pregnant, then he really started with it. Now she just steps slower. Exactly. That's all it was. She's less quick. She's less agile.

She doesn't have that crossover like she used to. spin move is not existing no it doesn't work anymore finally this daughter's born uh april 11th 1992 uh this poor little girl is brought into this this mess here uh now also in 1992 i don't know maybe to celebrate the birth of his daughter because sometimes you want to go out the people do that they Their kid will be born, they'll go out, take people out, buy drinks for everybody and smoke cigars and do all of that. Or there's other ways of doing it. If you're a junior, then you do it in a different way,

in a panhandle kind of way. You celebrate by getting arrested for assaulting a police officer, I feel like. So that's how you celebrate right there. He serves 80 days in jail for that and is released on probation after that because there's a girl and he had to just well yeah he just saw something and just started punching everything blue i'm beating the shit out i'm just punching it yeah i don't care

what color the timberwolves uniforms those twins 80s road uniforms were awfully blue the home ones whatever like the v-necks. They were that baby blue. I'd have knocked Kirby Puckett right on his fat ass. I'll tell you that right now. So that kid and her back ain't got a guy. Okay, never mind. Warren Moonberg, thank Christ they're purple. Fucking son of a bitch.

Blue and red make purple. I'll knock Warren Moon the fuck out. Warren Moon beat the shit out of his wife. That true he absolutely did true the same year he won man of the year in the nfl which is hilarious i think it was after he did it after he won man of the year anyway uh while he's serving this 80-day sentence for fucking assaulting a police officer like a complete idiot that's never okay either two people that you shouldn't hit women and cops don't hit either one of those because society judges you for that they just do it's just one of those fucking things sorry and oftentimes a man in a robe and a powdered wig will judge you yeah lots of societies who is assigned to judge you will judge you like

professionally for a living judge you not just like behind your back whispering guy who gets paid for it has a nice house sends his kids to college that guy or lady based on your judgment yes based on the judgment uh but while he's in jail daylene hooks up with another guy oh shit so as you can imagine this isn't going to go over well probably he had 80 days with him 80 days less than three months and uh she finds another dude to hook up with and he is not fucking happy about this at all uh he's awfully pissed off uh once he gets out of jail uh september of 1992 uh 92 uh she files for uh an order of protection against him okay so she it's it wasn't like she like hooked up with a guy and then didn't tell she told him through paperwork well she told well she it's it's an order of no this was he got out found out and was abusive to her so she filed an order of protection

and a petition for child support also these two are fire while you're at yeah this they've been together a year and a half think about all this shit we've talked about a year and a half a child involved there's i i know people have been married for 30 years and have done you couldn't put this over 30 years none of this is besides the child being born the rest of it didn't happen in 30 years what's happened in a year and a half it's fucking nuts i mean through horrible tragedies and stresses of life and bankruptcies and shit these people year and a half they can't make it well it's not these people this asshole a year and a half can't go without being an abusive fucking cock so uh this is uh this is an affidavit and a petition in support for an order of protection it asserts that uh that billy jr

here was physically and emotionally abusive toward her but uh that's september 21st 92 by september 29th 92 uh she files an order to dismiss the petition. She changes her mind. I mean, they go week to week with this. He beats her up. She files a thing. They make up. She pulls it back. He moves back in.

He beats her up. He leaves. It's a cycle. This is where my mom and her lives, the parallels stop. Yeah. We have begun a branch away from each other. Yeah, this is, fuck, man. My mom is on a different trajectory, and this lady is going some terrible path and i feel so bad for her too because she is goddamn 23 years

old imagine being 23 years old not having a lot of money having three if she had like 10 million in the bank she'd just be like fuck this guy i'm taking the kids to bermuda for a fucking month and everything's gonna be fine or whatever i'll a lawyer. I'll hire security to take him out of my house. You can do anything if you have money. If you don't have money and you don't have connections and you don't have a family that's financially supportive or whatever like that, you're alone, you have three kids and you're 22, that's got to be, I don't even under, I can't imagine the stress that has to be on a person.

That has to be insane. Yeah. You have to actually pull out the yellow pages and find the shelter. Especially in 1992. You know, there's no dog pile. You can't Google it. Yeah. There's the helplines are very few and far between.

And you're this guy's a fucking lunatic. You never know what's going to happen. You're afraid for you. You're afraid for your kids. You're afraid for everybody. And where are you going to run to? It's just I don't know. This is just a very scary situation.

Late December 1992. The baby is eight months old at this point. They have another custody evaluation in this evaluation counts here. Dailene tells the evaluator that a week before this on December 21st, 1992, she Billy Jr. had hit her in the back, punched her in the back, then threw a full can at her, which is vicious. Like a beer can?

Yeah, beer. She didn't specify. But I'm assuming it's a coffee can. I'm assuming it's maybe a Schaefer. I don't know, hams up in that neck of the woods. I don't know what they're drinking. A canned ham? A canned hams, possibly.

Are they drinking up there? Oh, I thought you meant like a big tin can. No, no, no what they're drinking a canned ham a canned hams possibly are they drinking up there oh i thought that's like a big no no no no not a canned ham a can of hams a shitty beer from the midwest okay i believe hams is from up in that but i could be totally wrong minnesotans send me your shitty local beer not your micro brew your schaefer your fucking genesee pale ale your shit p. Your local regional shitty swill that your teenagers drink in the woods and then throw up in the morning. Tell us that. It's bush light. It's something. So she says that he threw a can at her and then put her in a choke hold.

All this because she refused to have sex with him. Wow. I can't imagine why she wouldn't want to have sex with this guy. I mean, what couldn't she be attracted to about a complete piece of shit that beats her up and fucking scares her children and hits them?

Why wouldn't you? I can't imagine it. She told him, you know what? I never say this. This is on her. I mean, obviously he's a very attractive, virile man. i would have sex with him what are we what a fucking asshole i hate this fucking asshole already isn't that how you get blow jobs off the tinder is just kind of throw shit at them i think that's yeah well that's probably basically part of their profile digitally uh throwing a dick picket somebody's hitting them

with the beer can i think so but i think actually in their profile is they like to be hit with beer cans too some of these people on there. So December 28th, 1992, after speaking to the evaluator, counts obtains a restraining order against him again. He also seeks and obtains a restraining order against her on the same day. So this is his new strategy. Like, I'm afraid of her, too. You know, even though I've been beating her and hitting her and pushing her and fucking while she's pregnant and hitting her kids and smashing her with ham cans. Even though I did all of that, she's frightening me. As a result, they

ended up having order that was to both of them. Restrained each of them from committing acts of domestic abuse against each other, which you should not need an order for. It's just too much. That's all it is. It's her sample. I'll say it too this time that'll muddy the waters uh january 7th 1993 nine days later 10 days later not long right fucking now this is i mean this is all in less than two years this has all happened

think about that this is a fucking fiery relationship this is yeah this is as fiery as you get they're good though james oh i'm sure shit oh they probably had amazing sex at one point in the beginning has just and they're still chasing that drag and every time she goes back and every time he goes well i don't think maybe that's her motivation there are just stalagmites in their fucking yeah in their trailer when it was good that two days in the beginning like the three times they had sex when they weren't harboring hatred, when she wasn't frightened of him. You know what I mean?

You said their sex is heroin. Yeah, chasing the dragon. I just caught it. Really? That's good. Well, it was a minute and a half ago. It was a Hail Mary that I was running for.

It was an Ephus pitch. There's a whole bunch of guys in that end zone. It's a knuckler. You were waiting for it. I leaped up and grabbed it. That's a good catch. It was like Flut It was an Ephus pitch. There's a whole bunch of guys in that end zone. It's a knuckler. You were waiting for it. I leaped up and grabbed it. That's a good catch. It was like Flutie throwing in the end zone there.

How's it been? The 85 fucking orange ball. You went Flutie, I went Rodgers. That was nice. It's my favorite bomb in the history of football. Because he threw that thing like he had no idea. He's 5'8", and he just threw it looking the other direction. Just, I don't care!

And it somehow came down in somebody's hand he was resigned to losing he was like yeah fuck it fuck it he threw it as literally as far as he could with no discernible target in mind just I hope that reaches the end zone so January 7th Doug Flutie's over

it's a very odd scene they don't know why screamed Flutie Flakes and everything he was bringing over a sample of Flutie Flakes for the kids Doug Flutie's a very odd scene. They don't know why. He screamed Flutie Flakes and everything. Flutie Flakes. He was bringing over a sample of Flutie Flakes for the kids. Doug Flutie's a tiny football player, if you don't know. Had no business being a fucking quarterback. But he was a great quarterback. He was good at it. Super weird.

Very weird. This day, there's a call to police from their neighbor. So now other people are getting involved. When that shit starts spilling out. Minnesota people mind their own fucking business for the most. Like we said, they'll turn and tell somebody, but they're not going

to confront anything. When you call the cops in Minnesota because you've had enough, you're fucking serious. They've really been loud. She makes a complaint to the Red Wing Police Department

because she could hear Billy Jr. and counts arguing all day. She test if all day and all day argument. She says that she heard something being smashed against the wall that separated her apartment from their apartment so right next door you're just hearing all day arguing all day arguing something smashing against the wall like that's

a dish explode hot dish yeah that's all it was fuck is that hot dish or damn it that could have been delicious hot dish it's serious shit god now i can tell it's serious yeah her mom gave her that when she stopped by the house last time i heard it i heard it there's cheese shit god now i can tell it's serious yeah her mom gave her that when she stopped by the house last time i heard it i heard it there's cheese on the wall i know what i'm going in there so uh during the argument this neighbor heard billy jr make many many abusive comments to daylene including quote i'm going to get you bitch bitch, which is pretty damning. It's not good. It's also very...

Well, if I say it like that, if I said it in a mean way, it wouldn't have been funny. You wouldn't have laughed. If I said it like he said it, probably. But when you say it like a television announcer... It's very 12 Angry Men. Yeah, when you say it like you're announcing a character, I'm going to get you, bitch. It's a different... See? This is's see this is why

this is why this is what we try to do it doesn't make it any less horrible what happens but rather than saying he said i'm going to get you bitch and he'd rather than make it like oh let's all do let's try to fucking you know take some of the air out of it so we can forks and tiki torches yeah so we can like let's take a breath and uh you know whatever we're not trying to make light of the situation but we're trying to get through the situation without being completely uncomfortable uh because this makes me fucking uncomfortable it really does we've both been around this type of shit and it makes me very uncomfortable and i don't like it uh he also she also heard him say a little more specific this time because i'm going to get you bitch could

mean a lot of things. I mean, that could be in the middle of sex. Yeah, this is less. Well, this could be in the middle of sex, too. Quote, I'm going to smash you. Yeah. Which, I mean, not in 93, though. I don't think that was a term.

That's a lot of text messaging. And then, if you want to get even more specific, one could be playful. I'm going to get you, bitch. They're playing tag. Who knows? One can be, I'm going to, one could be playful i'm gonna get you bitch they're running they're playing tag who knows uh one can be i'm going to that could be sexual but this third one this you know now what it means uh it is quote i'm going to beat the shit out of you okay at that point you go oh yeah they're not fucking they're for sure fighting this is fighting this woman is in danger uh let me call the police and thankfully yeah thankfully she calls 9-1-1 okay thank fuck uh

so he ends up going to jail for violating the protective order that they was out 10 days ago right and she hasn't pulled back yet thankfully uh he's in jail in the goodhue county jail for violating this uh restraining order and a fellow inmate's talking to him and this guy's such a fucking asshole you know he's gonna brag about beating up his fucking girlfriend because he's a piece of shit. Have you ever known anybody who was abusive to women and bragged about it? Have you ever known anybody like that? No. I knew one guy like that.

Really? Yes, actually. Absolutely. I worked with him a long time ago at a job. And he wouldn't say, like, I beat the shit out of my wife. But he would say, like like it was so fucking weird. He would allude to like just making her do things that were not. I was like, yeah, I was like 18 at the time.

And this dude was like 45. And I worked on like a it was like a shipping and receiving loading dock and shit with like a bunch of old dudes. And I just was like, I didn't get it, man. And I was like 18. So I didn't know. Like I was like like is that was this like what marriage is like like the people fucking maybe that's what they do like i didn't know any better of each other yeah like i didn't know to be like dude fucking you're a scumbag motherfucker like he made it almost sound like it was like cool like it was so weird like to him like he was like i'm cool because i do that like it was so fucking weird i was so uncomfortable

i was like would never like want to work with this guy just if there was a truck i have to take a shit like i'm getting out of here maybe that's why he has the same career as an 18 year old that's true i worked there for like six months and he was like you know the the head of the crew there but he made like a dollar more an hour than me it was quite sad also understand that's what happens to guys who beat the shit out of their wives they should only make a dollar more an hour than an 18 year old he's not telling uh somebody that's his that's his peer he's telling somebody much younger he was telling the other guys and they were like okay with it and i was just like there and i was just like i don't want to hang out here anymore and that's i ended up leaving that job because i just didn't i didn't fit in the closest i've heard to

anything like that is if you hit a man you deserve deserve to be hit like a man. I don't know if that's true. No, I don't think that's right. But yeah, that's the and that's one of those things like, I don't know if that that guy's just saying that because he saw it on a bumper sticker one time and thought it was fucking clever. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. It's right. Not really.

No, I'm going to go with no on that one. Actually, I'm going to go with you're a scumbag. Right. I mean, if she's beating the living shit out of you and you have to maybe to do something back, but if she is a weapon, if your life is in danger, but if she daintily tags you in the shoulder, you should be able to flatten her. Really, bro? I don't think that's really fair.

Is that what you're going to do? I don't think that's really fair at all. You know what I mean? No. And then hopefully she'll be like, like fucking Mandy Malone and kick you in the face at that point have like the living fuck out of you able to throw her foot above your head and kick you in the fucking head like holy shit i deserved that yeah that's what we'd like that's what we needed that's what we need is like a malone squad i'll just send her around to talk to assholes like this she's like five to a buck twenty going you

want you got a problem motherfucker and would what this guy's ass in two seconds super great yeah we need a whole squad of these people that's what we need so that's what we need a malone squad that's she's coming to get you somebody shine the footlight yeah whatever the fuck it is and she comes kicking balls so this inmate he's talking to this inmate and uh he had also been jailed for violating a restraining order. So, you know, birds of a feather there. Red feather. Birds of a red feather stick together, I guess.

He said that Billy Jr. told this inmate that he knew it wasn't Counts that called the cops on him about the violation because he told Counts that he would, quote, do her in if she ever reported him again do her in and she believes me she believes me so she's not calling so the inmate obviously the inmate told on the guy and said that he he took the do her in to mean kill which i would agree i think it seems right i don't see what else it would be it's generally where that goes i don't think he's buying her flowers that means means I'm going to do her in. It's going to be the best bouquet you ever fucking saw, buddy. Every goddamn color rose in the fucking rainbow. It's going to be six dozen.

I'm going to have it split into two, three dozen bunches. I'm going to have one delivered to her office because that way all the other girls can see she can feel good about herself. You know what I mean? Then she'll go home with the thing. She'll be feeling good and open the door. There can be another one sitting right there, buddy. I tell you what, she's going to be like, oh, my God, my whole house already smelled like roses.

It's going to be the best day ever. No, that's not what the fuck happened. Kill. Kill is what she meant. Do her in on Family Feud right after Richard Dawson spreads mono and herpes. Yeah, yeah. Absolutely. What does do her in mean?

We'll get to the STDs. Kill. Ding, ding, ding. Number one. You get a pass or play. Oh, boy. Yeah, let's pass on that one, let's say here. So that's not good.

No. Do her in. Another time, a friend of Count's says later on that she saw Billy Jr. drag her by the hair, drag Count's by the hair, and be very abusive with her while they were arguing at a bar oh my so this is even in public he grabbed her by the fucking hair and dragged her over to argue with her more which is insane and i don't know how nobody fucking broke a pool cue over his head because if i'm in a bar and i see that i'm gonna fucking punch that guy this is stopping that something's happening you're gonna get three other guys and go look at this and you're gonna go over

and pound the piss out of that guy what's going on here pal like that's not never gonna fly i would hope anyway in a civilized world the best case scenario is it's a hidden hidden camera show and i'm gonna oh shit as i'm about to drill this guy in the ear hole oh i don't have to deafen this man with a punch to his ear shit great idea i was gonna bust his eardrum i guess i don't have to this is beautiful this is great thanks you're a good actress i really thought you were in trouble let me tell you something oh is that you yeah i did see you on that show on the wb you were very good you were very the show was terrible you were excellent you didn't get a daytime oh my god so uh yeah this is fucking nuts uh they uh so by march of 1993, they're completely apart. The relationship is over.

They live apart and they say they're done and they say they've been done for like a month and they haven't gone back together with each other. None of this is happening. Somehow, I don't know how in the world this happened. I don't know if he scared her into this, if she was so in such a terrible mental place that she allowed this to happen, or if somehow the worst court, the worst court judgment ever happened. But he ended up with custody of their daughter. What the fuck? This man ended up with custody of a female, small human being. What?

Who would give? I wouldn't let this guy fucking take a kid to chucky cheese never mind live with them supervision without a lot of supervision yeah i want people who are i want trained people i want armed people i want tasers i want to be like he's a zoo animal i want somebody with like glasses yeah notepad writing stuff down like lab coat and then somebody armed also next to him telling them when to go in and take care of business uh but apparently you only give him two dollars let's zap him yeah write that down so yeah i think that's bad you're a terrible father so this i can't imagine what could the only thing

i could think is maybe he scared her into it possibly and told her and it over yeah made her feel so bad about herself also maybe that she thought she couldn't take care of the kid because he might've told her that she was a, who the fuck knows what this asshole did to this poor woman. It's for, in two years you can really damage somebody. And I mean, especially like this physically,

these are only the things that came to light that were seen by other people and that were noted by the police. So imagine how many incidents, how many nights this guy flew off the handle and did God knows what. And nobody ever found out about it. Nobody ever reported it. That's the thing. All the every incident you see, there's 20 more that don't fucking happen.

And that goes for all of this type of thing. It's fucking frightening. So, God, I guess, you know, try to Jesus. It's terrible. I'm thinking the worst, though. Like, how many times was she? I mean, you have to assume she was definitely raped by him. I'm sure.

If he's throwing beer cans at her because she won't do it willingly. I'm sure. I'm sure he was. Yeah, this guy has no... There's no limits to this fucking guy. So he lives with... So he's got the daughter. The only contact that they really have together, Dailene and Billy Jr. here, is when she has

visitations with the daughter. She visits the daughter at his place, which is weird because he lives with his parents. So I think maybe that's what it is, too. She's still safe. Well, she probably had an apartment. I know she has an apartment with two other kids, and he lives with his parents and there's no kids. So maybe that was the situation where my house is better, there's

room there. Who the fuck knows what it was. The grandparents are there. The grandparents are there, which made it safe. Yeah, that might have have made her feel even though they created this fucking monster so god knows what happened there how's their relationship yeah let's see i'd like to that dad's probably a fucking peach so uh march 17th 19 raised a man yeah raised a real fucking solid citizen here march 17th 1993 he pleads guilty to violating a restraining order filed by her so it's been a couple months i mean you who goes two months without restraint violating a restraining order i mean i i would be like checking my watch like have i that's what i forgot to do shit it's been

over two months i'm way off schedule here i need to find really bad at this i still have yet to get to violate that i mean i know no one has restraining orders against me. I really, you know, I would be on schedule, too, with violating them. I'd be right there. I'm unrestrained as fuck right now. That's the problem. Jesus Christ. Hey, everybody.

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Now, this guy is going to be with him kind of on and off the rest of the night. They go. They're going out to dinner together on the way. They drive to Count's apartment and leave the daughter with her for a weekend visit. So daughter's with her for the weekend. He's going off to party with his parents and this Jay Lampman guy to eat dinner and live it up so uh yeah this is going well for him uh what a night ahead of him wingman to pick up chips in front of his mom beat the holy shadow in front of his mom hopefully fingers crossed so uh that's that's a good boy that's how we taught him he's a nice

lutheran boy did you see his cross head that good. See, he used his back hand like we told him. That's right. It hurts worse. You call that a paintbrush, Ed? Come on, Ed. Jesus. So they drop the daughter off here. When they drop the daughter off, they go into the apartment. Just Billy Jr. and the daughter go into the apartment. They don't bring the whole clown car in there with them. Bring mom and dad and Jay Lantman and all these people. To drop off a baby. Yeah, so Counts was there. Also there was her friend Catherine Weddle, and also Counts' other two children were also there.

They're five years old and three years old at this point. Oh, God. So, yeah, so there's two kids. Her and her friend are all hanging out over there, and they drop the baby off, who's like 11 months old at this point, I believe. Yeah, 11, born in April, so 11 months old. And this is what's going on. Counts asks, this is insane, Counts asks Billy Jr. to step into a bedroom to talk. So they're in there for about 15 to 20 minutes talking, okay?

This is, yeah, I don't know why. It makes sense. She has to tell him something,, I don't know why. It makes sense. She has to tell him something, but I don't know why she'd want to be anywhere alone in the room with this guy at all. So they're in there during this conversation. Apparently, Counts told Billy Jr. that she had contracted chlamydia. Oh, no. Okay.

So now we're entering chlamydia into this cocktail. Oh, God. This is a, any cocktail, once you add chlamydia into this cocktail. This is a... Any cocktail, once you add chlamydia, that's a bad ingredient, and it really befouls the whole thing. It's really going to be a rough cocktail at that point. Oh, my God. This is not going to turn out well.

Yeah. So she says she contracted chlamydia and suggested that he himself get tested for chlamydia. Why don't you should probably get tested for that? Wow. I'm so glad I've never had any conversation anywhere near that. Come in the bedroom for a minute. He probably thought, I bet she wants to fuck me. And then she was like, I have chlamydia.

You should get tested, which is the opposite of I want to fuck you. That's the opposite. I'm not fucking for quite some time. What's the opposite of I want to fuck you? I have chlamydia and you should get tested. That's the opposite.'m not fucking for quite some time what's the opposite if i want to fuck you i have chlamydia and you should you should get tested that's the opposite and you might too that's the answer everyone right there in the 25 000 fucking std period horrible conversation the worst game show ever so uh yeah she says he should get tested uh he then says this is what he claims he claims that she said after that quote good luck finding a girlfriend now okay he said that that's what he says he says she said that

okay the friend didn't hear that that's what he says what do you say when a girl says that to you because i'm a sicko and i might go let me see yeah what do you got what's it look like what am i gonna have going on here in a minute? What do you have? Because if I Google it, I'm going to see the extreme case. I don't want to see that shit. You don't want me to think that's what's going on in there, do you? I just want to see whatever your mild case is right now. He becomes very angry.

This is the only time in the entire episode where I'm like, that's reasonable. The only time I've ever with this entire guy where he got very angry, but he didn't do anything. He just stormed out of the house. Perfect response to that. That's exactly what he should have done. Don't do anything crazy. Don't stand there and yell at her. Don't fucking hit her.

Storm out of the house. But I agree with this behavior. I'm fine with that. I can't say I wouldn't do the same thing. Fine. Why are you fucking unprotected and me what are you doing what's happening out there uh problem is he didn't stick with that behavior because he returns a minute later oh no so he leaves for a moment now mind you his parents are outside now so he leaves goes outside i don't know if he told them she gave me fucking chlamydia and then turned around and went back in or what the fuck the deal was so he may not even have it that's the other thing he hasn't even been tested yet here uh so a moment later he

returns uh according to that weddle lady uh screaming at counts and asking her for a small amount of money that she apparently owed him uh now i don't know when it went from chlamydia to you owe me 50 bucks but those are very different yeah those are very different emotions i'm mad at you for the possible std you've inflicted on me by the way where's that 50 you owe me because that's what i'm really mad about i have to pay for a test now i'm gonna need that money back i suppose accounts refuse to pay yeah now i don't know about this like i said i'm i'm on her side through this entire thing if you give someone chlamydia and you owe him 50 bucks pay him back to 50 bucks. That's the least you can do after you.

Pay up quick. Then again, he kind of deserves chlamydia. Like, I've never really rooted. You're not wrong. I've never wanted someone to have chlamydia, but I kind of want him to have it. I'd like to see him in discomfort. And whatever's worse. Let's give him syphilis.

What do you say? Do we have any of those experiments still going on? Because this guy's a perfect fucking candidate. It's just a shot that fixes it. I's like he's freaking out i don't know what he's probably had it before i'm sure uh he apparently keeps screaming at her and screaming at her and uh saying that she owed he owed her money or she she owed him money and she refused to pay again so then he yells and this is his jesus christ this is his coup de grace here his quote i'm surprised you didn't give me aids and then he stomped out in anger uh and left the daughter

behind though didn't pick up the daughter that's his mic drop that's his mic drop i'm surprised i'm surprised you didn't give me aids and then he stomps out of the room uh so well don't be so surprised because she got you anyway she got maybe you got you maybe. You never know. So he is pissed, okay? He gets back to the car with his parents and his friend there, and he's not in the mood to go out and have a fucking, he's not in the mood to go to the Sizzler now and, you know, get those tacos with the corn and the meat for some reason that they had in the 90s there. It's TikTok to Pussy Dick.

Yeah, he's not happy. It could be real bad here real quick. Yeah, he's got a lot on his mind he could be in the middle of one of those one of those uh surf and turf that's just shrimp and sirloin yeah that's that's the other problem too is that you know chlamydia is kind of an appetite suppressant if you think you have it i think not the actual disease the mental anguish of possibly having it as an appetite suppressant i'm gonna go with you get halfway through dipping your sirloin in the ketchup yeah and then your dick just starts burning which you have to do with a sizzler steak probably because it'd be a quarter of an inch thin and burnt to a

crisp so he uh he decides he doesn't want to go out to dinner anymore and he instead asks his parents to take him to a liquor store to buy beer, which is the opposite of going out to dinner with your parents. So his parents are like, OK, you know, they've dealt with it. If he's flying in the rages all the time, they know what he's like. They're like, oh, let's just do what he wants. Get him. Get him liquor. It's fine.

And Ted's like, his dick's going to sting, babe. Yeah. Let's beer him up. We don't know if he told them why he's upset or if he just said he's got problems with her or if he said she fucking gave me chlamydia right when he came out or if he was saying i'm surprised you didn't give me aids as he was like on the front porch so everyone could hear i'm not sure getting in the back seat of the sedan yeah yeah so what do you mean by that son yeah dad never mind remember the Dad? Remember when you were young? Remember when they would clap?

Do you remember, Dad? You remember that? You know what I'm saying, right? Okay, then. Wink, wink. That's where I'm at, Dad. The mother's like, I don't understand, dear. I'm like, you shouldn't understand.

So they stop at the liquor store. He buys a bunch of beer. Then his parents drive them. They drive Lampman and Billy Jr jr here to lampman's house where they drank beer and played cards so uh very exciting night this is what people did before there was any sort of uh streaming video or anything like that they said want to drink beer and play cards he's like all right and that's what they did and is it friday night it is friday night this is friday night this is they were going out to dinner that didn't take places are closed everything's closed yeah you're really not gonna uh but he finds it the next day we'll find out

here so uh they go there they drink beer they play cards while they're there uh billy jr here tells lampman uh just out of the playing cards or drinking beer and he goes you know i'm gonna kill her he's like i'm gonna kill her he's like I'm going to kill her. He's like, I'm going to kill her. He's like, I've been thinking about it. And he's like, I'm really, this is getting too much for me. I really should kill her. I mean, I've been looking on my list of things to do. And I went to the grocery store and I did this and I dropped the kids off.

And I paid the water bill like I'm supposed to. And there's a glare and just a hole in this saying, kill that bitch that I really, I got to do it. I don't know what it is is lampman on the other side of the table going this is his way of bluffing me i see it he's he's got a good fucking hand right now and he don't want to let me know it so he's like i'm gonna kill my girlfriend like that's what everybody does and they got a good hand no uh this i think lampman was just trying to like i said lampman's his friend he knows him yeah this is the guy that flies off the handle and he's fucking you know he gets in an argument with a guy at a bar and then he goes

home and he's like i'm gonna go back there and shoot everybody in that fucking place and you're like yeah man you should do yeah i know what you mean buddy and then you have two beers you play a game of fucking sega genesis or 1993 you know game of you know game of kings in the corners and you're ready to go or or it's the opposite where you've seen him drag her across the the and you're just like oh no right yeah either way i feel like he's just trying to like let's just drink beer and play cards and then it'll go away you know what i mean like he'll cool off he saw her drag he saw him drag her across the crowded cricket by the hair yeah and and at that point i'd be like i don't know he's yeah he did that shit in public he He might kill her.

Well, then I could see you could ignore it the first time. Well, then he says he's going to fuck her up at one point. I really got to fuck her up. And then later on, he says he's going to, quote, finish her. So maybe they were playing Mortal Kombat on Sega Genesis. So he said he's going to finish her at that point, which none of these things are going to kill her. I'm going to fuck her up and finish her. All bad to hear.

Eventually, these two, Lampman and Billy Jr. here decide to leave Lampman's house to go to a party at the apartment of Jerry Lewis. Not that Jerry Lewis. Imagine that if it was like fucking at that point, 75 year old Jerry Lewis, fresh from an MDA telethon, just being like, everybody come to my house and watch me be not funny and exhaust everybody with my antics. Or it's Jerry Lee Lewis playing a fiery piano while getting a blowjob from a cousin.

From a 15-year-old cousin, from an underage cousin. No. Fuck this Jerry Lewis just going, Williams Stole it all from me I was annoying Way before he was annoying Way before No idea Well you should add

Your gangster ass co-host Kill everybody then You fuck You blew it You big headed fuck Yeah big bad Oh shit Release your holocaust movie

I want to see you at your worst He's dead now right Look that up I think he died He's a dick No one Jerry Lewis is an asshole To a lot of people Did his head finally explode and release your holocaust movie i want to see you at your worst he's dead look that up i think he died i hope he's a dick no one jerry lewis is an asshole did his head finally explode i think i think that's what happened like a ripe melon yeah there were seeds in it so uh they decide to leave to go to now this is amazing this guy this jerry lewis think about this confidence that this man has okay he has a party okay now of all, you shouldn't have parties in apartments, number one,

unless you live in Manhattan or somewhere where there's no other domiciles. You know what I mean? Even then, get a fucking brownstone if you want to have a party, unless you have like a big, nice apartment. Otherwise, fuck you. You're an asshole. Yeah, if you live in an 800-square-foot apartment, don't have a party. Don't be an asshole.

No, don't. One person at a time, that's it. One person. That's the one you fucking send home. Yeah, and then send them home, and then you can have a party. Don't be an asshole. No, don't. One person at a time. One person. And that's the one you fucking send home. And you send them home and then you can have a friend over. And then when they leave, the girl comes back or the guy comes back or whatever. This guy not only is in an apartment, he lives at the Red Wing Motel. So he lives at the shit hotel in town and he's like, party time, baby.

So you know this is a white trash affair, I feel like. It's a motel in the first place and it's a motel named after the town. That's the one. So that means it's the most run-down old shitty one that's been there for- It's the first one. It's terrible, yeah. People live there. They don't just stay there.

This is like where Woody Harrelson in Kingpin lives, where he has to fuck his landlord for rent money. This is where that is, I feel like. I don't even know if he really fucked her or if he just went down on her. I think he went down. No, I think he actually fucked her too. She said he really jarred something loose there, Ty. So I feel like he was pounding on it at that point. I feel like he was giving it to business. What is it about good sex that makes you have to poop?

Makes you have to crap. Crap. She says it with that accent, too. That Western Pennsylvania, peel the paint off the walls, crap. Makes you have to crap. Scranton, baby. God, Jesus. She's a good actress.

She is. That lady's not gross in real life, and she doesn't talk like that. She's in something about Mary, too. She plays Magda. She's great at playing a lunatic. So they go to the Red Wing Motel to go to Jerry Lewis's MDA party-a-thon, I guess. Before they leave, Billy Jr. asks Lampman if he has a knife that he could have,

which that's not necessary to go to the party. The Red Wing Motel is a very nice establishment. Jerry Lewis is a nice young man. You're just raising money for the kids. I don't get it here. So Lampman tells Billy Jr. that he did not know whether there was any knives in the house. Right there, that tells you that he didn't want this guy to do anything that he's doing,

and he's afraid of him, and he doesn't want him to have knives. I don't know if there's any. I don't keep knives in my home. I don't cut things or meat or food or anything. It's very rare that I eat anything that requires a knife. Imagine, I've never met anybody who doesn't have a knife in their house at all have you i know your family they fucking get knives at steakhouses yeah i don't care yeah that's the craziest thing that's true yeah that's fucking hilarious who was that that did that it's your cousin

he fucking pulls up i got this blade what do you for? He's like, this is the best knife in the world. Do you know that? Yeah, yeah. It's the best steak. Listen, I'm fucking so frightened right now. Dude, everybody back home carries some sort of weird weapon. I used to, too. I used to have like three box cutters on me at all times, like the orange ones that you

click up. I'd have like three of those on me at all. So you never know. And then I knew kids that just carried around hammers. Just a fucking new york the hammer was a like a weapon of choice kids that carried screwdrivers and hammers because then they could they in their mind if the cops stopped them and searched and they can bullshit their way out of that like they were going to go do construction work with a hammer that was down

their pants hooked onto their belt loop and down their pants come on like a claw hammer like a fucking claw hammer guys would carry around because if any shit popped off you whip out a hammer that's dangerous you're fucking that's it's on so that's it but that's what it was or or a giant ass steak knife yeah or a giant yeah a big steak knife i know guys would carry huge screwdrivers around with them like a huge flat head screwdriver i'm like what are you doing doing? The Phillips head is much better to penetrate. So, never mind. What happened to the Jets and the Sharks days, man? Get a switchblade.

No, no, no. While the switchblade, the cops will say you have a knife. This, in your mind, you're like, I'm doing construction. Yeah, okay. Just, you have one tool. You're dressed like a fucking thug. You have one tool, and you're with eight other guys, and everyone has blunts in their hand. I'm headed to Ruth's Chris.

You don't understand. I'm going to cut up a nice steak. This is the best steak night. I carry my own. That's how it is. That's where we all did it. What the fuck? So he said, I don't know if we have any knives in the house.

Knives? Who keeps utensils in their home? That's crazy. What are you talking about? Knives? No. I don't have anything. I don't even keep that.

I don't eat. Do you eat food? I don't eat food. I don't even keep that. I don't eat. Do you eat food? I don't eat food. I don't eat in the house. There's no food in the house. So instead, Billy Jr. goes into the kitchen and he goes into the kitchen and at this point Lampman heard a drawer open but he says he never saw Billy

Jr. with a knife but he went in the drawer where the utensils are so he can assume he probably grabbed a knife out of there. And when he opened the drawer he saw like five steak knives in there. He's probably thinking, yeah, you don't know if you have a fucking knife in the house. Guy's lucky he didn't get stabbed. So they end up, they leave the house, and they walk to the party, which is pretty close by.

It's all in this little town. They walk to the party. They only stay about 15 or 20 minutes. While they're at the party, Billy Jr. can't shut the fuck up about counts. He can't shut up about Daylene and how he's mad at her and he wants to kill her. And he's at a party just spewing this. A juvenile female who was at the party, under 18, so we don't have her name here. She said she overheard him say, quote, I'm going to kill her.

If that's not enough, in case you didn't hear that loud and clear, I'm going to fucking kill her. So I'm going to kill her. I'm going to fucking kill her twice. So, yeah, that's, you know, that's that's strong. So at this point, Billy Jr., Lampman and Lewis all leave the party and walk toward Lampman's house. Lewis leaves his own party. He's going with them, leaving the ship. It's just a motel.

I don't know in this joint. Let him kick holes in the drywall. What the fuck do i care so uh they walk toward lampman's house i guess somewhere along the way and this i don't understand too they're walking at night in a small town somewhere along the way uh billy jr peels off on his own okay and disappears and they're like okay lampman and lewis are like i don't know man fucking and iantman was like, dude, you have no idea what I've been dealing with all night. He wanted a fucking knife and she gave him chlamydia. And you know, Jesus Christ. I mean, taken in stride like the old dirty bastard got burnt once, but it was only gonorrhea.

You know, take it in stride. In every one of his songs, he mentioned it. You know, he was proud of it. He was not. Well, maybe he was proud of it. He was proud of it. He was. He was like, it's all right. You know, he didn't mind. Went away. He was like, because. He was not. Well, maybe he was proud of it. He was proud of it. He was. He was like, it's all right.

You know, he didn't mind. Went away. He was like, because I've been fucking. That was the way. That was the way he presented it, though. You know, that means this was in a woman. That's what I mean. You can't get it without fucking.

I think he was getting that. So, you know. It's true. Don't get it from a water fountain. No, you don't. So, Lantman and Lewis returned to Lantman's house and they watched Goodfellas, which is a wise decision. Good call. Good fucking call.'s house and they watch Goodfellas, which is a wise decision. Good call.

Good fucking call. Can't go wrong with Goodfellas ever. While watching the movie, Lampman tells Lewis that Billy Jr. told him that he was going to kill Counts 2. So it was overheard at the party by a young woman. He told Lampman and then also took Lewis aside and was like, you know, Dailene, I'm a fucking killer. Like he told her. So he's telling everyone that will listen that I'm going to kill her. So, you know, this Jimmy reminds me of somebody real. You know how he just smacks the shit out of her.

Yeah. You know, you know, he said something like this. Yeah. Well, I could see when he's smacking her around. That's right. He says, Karen, I got enough. Don't worry about getting whacked on the street. I got to come home for this.

Yeah. That's how the scene goes perfectly. So, yeah, that's he was like, oh, you know what about getting whacked on the street. I got to come home for this. Yeah, that's how the scene goes perfectly. So, yeah, he was like, oh, you know what? Yeah, gun in the face, I see. I've seen that before. So he did wake up with a gun barrel in his face. So that was an offensive move he could. But everything else he did was wrong.

He gave her a chance, too. Yeah, he did. You know, do it. Still, though, he shouldn't have done that. No. He shouldn't have done everything he did in that movie. Bad job, Henry Hill. Anyway, moving on.

So they watch Goodfellas. Lampman tells Lewis, like I said, he told me, hey, he's going to kill her. A few hours go by, and then Billy Jr. comes back to Lampman's house, shows back up again. Jerry Lewis leaves shortly after. He's got a very busy schedule. He leaves shortly after Billy Jr. gets back, because he's probably like, I don't want to be near this crazy motherfucker billy jr then tells lampman uh you're like what'd you do you know lampman's like well what'd you do where you were gone and he's like oh i killed her i killed counts uh yeah oh yeah and she he's like no you didn't and he said quote i fucked the bitch up that was

his quote on it so he's a he's got a lot of remorse you can tell right right away there's flamidia all over that room. Oh, spread everywhere. You can tell his heart's breaking from this by the quote, I fucked the bitch up. He's a mess. He felt terrible about it. Oh, God. You can just see his soul, his heart's breaking. So

Billy Jr. then tells Lantman that he stabbed counts in the heart. And he says, quote, I did Dailene. That was what he said. And Lantman later indicated, he tells him that he doesn't fucking believe him. He's says, quote, I did Dailene. That was what he said. And Lampman later indicated he tells him that he doesn't fucking believe him. He's like, no, you fucking didn't. Because, I mean, you don't believe that you you don't want to believe that some dude you hang out with just went and killed his fucking girlfriend and then told you about it. That's the other thing. Don't tell me about it. But all the signs are there, I would say. So everything

leading up to it would make you think so i'll tell you right now if anybody out there if we ever become friends and we come tight and you're about to kill your girlfriend slash wife don't fucking tell me about or tell me about i'll call the cops on you but i'm not gonna let you just do that no if you're gonna kill other people if you have a business problem with somebody or something you're gonna whack that's your fucking business but if it's your wife or girlfriend i'm gonna tell on you that's scummy so especially if you have kids don't do that shit yeah Yeah, you're an asshole. So at this point, he said he did this guy saying, I don't believe you.

And Billy Jr. then spent the night at this guy's house. This guy's like, well, I guess curl up on my futon, you murdering son of a bitch. I don't know how you would leave that at that. Well, I said I did. And he's like, well, I don't believe you. Well, good night. And like, how do you break up a card game and just go to bed at that point also you're a dangerous individual and i'm gonna leave you in my house they played cards the rest of the night after that shit he stuck around they played cards

the rest of the night i guess goodfellas was over i guess he really didn't believe he didn't believe him apparently or he just didn't want to or honestly too didn't want to or if he might have thought if i say i believe him yeah and he thinks that i think he did it he might fucking decide that he needs to kill me next i might my only hope here might be going no get out of here i know you didn't do it that way yeah that way he thinks that i don't believe him right it's the only way so the next morning uh this is the following morning march 20th billy jr goes to the hospital to get tested for chlamydia now he goes no he goes right here the next morning first thing bright and early he goes uh later that morning, first thing, bright and early, he goes. Later that

morning, he returns to his parents' house and then Jay Lampman comes over a short time later. Why would you come hang out with this guy? After last night, I'm never talking to this guy again. Maybe go by Daylene's and see if she's okay. That would be one. That would be my first trip in the morning. The second he left,

I'd be like going over, yeah, where'd she live again? You killed her? Yeah, where'd she live again? you killed her yeah where'd she live again and there was that which apartment was that oh yeah okay i remember that well he's been there yeah that's true yeah that's true i'm gonna go i'm gonna go knock on the fucking door and check on this fucking girl i think at this point where are you heading right now you're gonna go get tested all right oh cool cool you're gonna be busy for like two hours yeah i'm gonna go over here i think a little instead and even if he didn't have any interest in that and literally did not believe that he did that and just thought he was blowing off steam, I still, I'm not going to go hang out with the guy the next day after that mess of a time. So Lantman arrives a short time after he gets to his parents.

Billy tells Lantman that he tested positive for herpes, which I know from Loveline from back in the day that that's not a thing. You don't test. It's a visual diagnosis because people used to call Loveline all the time and go, I got a rash on my dick and blah, blah, blah. I think it's herpes. And Dr. Drew would go, you can't diagnose skin shit over the phone. I don't know. Does it look like?

I don't know. I don't know what to tell you. And he'd be like, well, do I go get tested? And he's like, only if you have shit showing. Otherwise, there's no way to. you can't just test for that. It's a visual diagnosis. So anyway, he says he tested positive for herpes. And then Lampman said that he that he again told him that, oh, yeah.

And by the way, I really did kill Dailene last night. I wasn't fucking lying about that. So apparently then Billy Jr. went upstairs telling Lampman that he was going upstairs for a shotgun, and he had the gun there to, quote, take the cops out when they came for him.

So every decision he's made has been poor so far. So then Lampman says that Billy Jr. puts a shotgun in the bathroom, I guess where you wouldn't expect it, where he goes, I guess you can say, before you take me away,

I'm going to take a quick piss. And then he comes out fucking guns blazing or just in case, like when they get there, he's in there shitting. You know what I mean? You got to have one close by when you're vulnerable. Sitting on the bowl with his fucking barrels pointed at the door. That's paranoia. So at about 2.30 p.m., his Billy, Billy Jr.'s brother calls from where? The Minnesota Correctional Facility in St. Cloud, where he is a fucking prisoner.

Perfect. So, let's go over this now. This is what I mean about Billy's parents and having the kid around, having the baby around them. Yeah, they have one in jail and then one who assaults police officers, beats the shit out of his pregnant girlfriend and possibly kills him. Brags at minimum. Brags about it. Yeah, absolutely. Just contracting STDs left and possibly kills him. Brags at minimum. Brags about it. Yeah, absolutely. Just contracting STDs left and right.

Jesus. So he calls the house from the correctional facility at St. Cloud. Lampman answers the phone over there for some reason and tells Billy Jr.'s brother that he should speak to Billy Jr. He's like, you need to talk to him. So Lampman is answering phones and accepting charges apparently because it's his brother right so he knew that they were going to accept the charges what's what's to say that we aren't mad at that man today yeah i feel like he's out there i feel like he's there all the time i feel like lampman

and him are it grew up together i feel like it's that sort of thing anybody at my house never accept phone charges from fucking if i have a fucking landline then that's my stupid tell you what i don't have a landline i deserve it yeah the telemarketers polling everything i deserve it all because no there's a landline you're free to call 1-900 numbers all go ahead all you want and that's right because they don't exist anymore either so anyway so uh he tells him he needs to talk to him so billy jr then speaks to his brother and he tells him by the way he tells an inmate on a recorded on a jail line that it may be recorded that he killed counts and he left the three children with her what with the dead

body this is what he tells his brother says i killed her and just left the kids there with the body which one is your own. Wow. I mean, to do that, if that's true, to do that, the heartlessness and that is bonkers. Yeah. So later that evening, about 536 p.m., that Catherine Weddle, I think she got off of work and she goes over to Count's apartment. She has keys, opens the door and finds Daylene dead. Oh, my God.

I mean, blood everywhere. She was stabbed a lot. Oh, boy. And I mean blood everywhere. She was stabbed a lot. Oh, boy. And there's blood everywhere, and all three kids are there. They are screaming and crying. Soaked in blood. Bloody and a mess,

and they're kids, and they think their mother's hurt, and they're trying to help her, and it's a fucking Dexter situation. Seriously, this is some Dexter shit here. This is the worst. Count's daughter there, Count's daughter, the one who's five now, told the friend, Catherine Weddle, that Bill killed her mother because she was there. The kids saw this fucking shit.

He did this in front of fucking kids, man. And Jesus Christ. So the neighbor then ran to Weddle. The friend ran to a neighbor's house and said to call 911 and get the police here and all that. And then the police finally show up. And man, what a fucking mess this is. This is horrible. The coroner here says that counts had a deep stab wound inflicted through her clothing that reached her heart and caused her death and caused her to bleed out.

That was the cause of death. But much of her clothing had been cut because he was just slashing her. Slashing and slicing. Her abdomen, both arms, thighs, buttocks, everything were all slashed. She had a deep stab wound in her buttocks. Also, he stabbed her in the ass really deep to be an asshole about it a stab wound below her left breast and he carved the letter t into her stomach what he carved a fucking letter in her stomach what's the letter for i don't even know what that stands for and

we never find out wow because he's he i don't even what the fuck is he calling her a tramp is he stamping her i don't know that's what i mean i don't know what he's even what this is in regard what this is in reference to if this is something that they had talked about if that's the guy she was fucking or maybe he's just a bad cross or he's bad at it yeah i don't know what what it is but dude he's car wow that's sick man he didn't just stab her and kill her and in a rage and whatever the fuck. Marked her up. He went and tried to make it known that he wanted to take his aggression out on her. And then he carved.

That's sick, man. And also, her left eye was bruised. The medical examiner thought that the injury to the eye was inflicted before death. It's premortem here. And also he said it might have happened as much as a day before. So that might have happened, you know, whatever, earlier. He might have socked her in the eye or something when he was arguing with her when he walked out. The other injuries were, he says, to the single, the stab to the heart was the fatal one.

And he said all the other ones were postmortem. So he killed her pretty quick with the stab to the heart and then cut her up while she was already dead. And while the kids were there, while the fucking kids were there, investigation here. Obviously, the police find him to be a suspect right away when the kid's like, yeah, this guy did it. That's something. Stepdaddy did it. I mean, yeah, it's bill yeah uh they go to his parents house where they found him and uh they end up arresting him obviously right away right away just to you know make sure because

there was no plan there's no yeah there's no knife her up yeah that's that's that's and then tell everyone about it which is insane and hopefully my dick healed and then everything will be fine tell everyone about it beforehand and afterwards just to make sure they all know. When they questioned him about his whereabouts the night of the killing and the next day, he denied killing her. He told police he was with a friend the entire evening of the murder through the next morning until about 10.30 a.m. He said then he went to a hospital to get tested for an STD that he told him that counts told him that she had contracted. So he said, you know, no, I just hung out with my friend, played some cards.

Got my dick checked. Got my dick checked, and here I am. I don't know what you're talking about. She's hurt? Oh, no. She's what? Oh, no. But then in the basement of his parents' home, I mean, this is the dumbest thing ever,

they find a hand-drawn picture of a bleeding heart with a knife sticking out of it with the words, help me, written underneath it. Wow. He might as well have videotaped it and just gave it to the cops. Why don't you just watch what I did here? I took the liberty. There's two angles. So just in case.

It's a two-camera shoot. That's what I mean, because if she turns a little, you really want to see the, you go to the other side. Just cut to camera two. I did audio for both of them, so it's fine. You can sync them up and do whatever you got to do i had a grip wow uh at that point they were like let's take this asshole to the police station we there's a lot of uh whatever anyway and this is pretty bad so uh later that evening there's an audio taped interview and he denies killing her again and again and again april 19th 1993 which is like a month later, they indict him finally, you know, formally 10 counts, including three of first degree murder with premeditation.

You don't want to have those. 10 counts are murder in the first degree with premeditation, murder in the first degree while committing criminal sexual conduct with force or violence, murder in the first degree while committing domestic abuse. So he raped her, too. That's what they're saying. It's possibly like they're talking about the stab wounds and stuff, but we'll talk about that.

That doesn't end up panning out legally. Got it. Also, murder in the first degree while committing domestic abuse when the perpetrator has engaged in a past pattern of domestic abuse upon the victim. Brilliant. This is a good law that Minnesota has, and that's a big one. Pay attention to that, because he's going to really have a problem with that particular deal there. They would have been good for O.J.

I never heard O.J. charged with that exactly. Yeah, what the fuck? They just had to establish a pattern, but there wasn't a special aggravator for it. I'll bet L.A. County has it now. Probably. Murder, this was 93. That's progressive for 93. Murder in the second degree with intent but without premeditation murder in the second degree with intent while

in order for of protection is in effect murder in the third degree with uh without intent but evincing a depraved mind uh count uh seven is criminal sexual conduct in the second degree sexual contact causing personal injury by force or coercion uh then assault on in the second degree with a dangerous weapon endangerment of a child and neglect of a child those are good those are all good charges meanwhile how many murders does minnesota have that they put this much thought into the way they gave the jury options so if he says well we if they say well we don't think it was premeditation they're like all right well then count three is good for you yeah count fucking uh count two would be for you. Or it's crazy.

Yeah. What about that? You don't need the rough rust proofing. Well, how about new tires? How about the 17 inch wheels? What do you think of those? Those are pretty nice. So he tries.

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At TrueCar.com. And now back to the show. And then he ends up pulling that back and just tries to get dismissed two counts of the indictment. two counts of the indictment. He argued that the domestic abuse homicide statute, the one about the pattern of domestic abuse, is unconstitutionally vague because it does not define the term pattern in the phrase past pattern of domestic abuse.

How about we're all adults and we all speak fucking English and everyone in that courtroom went to fucking college and they all know what pattern means. How about that? You seen a quilt motherfucker? They didn't define the word sky. So I don't really know what they mean when they say the sky is blue. They could mean the ground. I'm not sure. No. You ever heard of a child

named sky? We have words and we know what they mean. Pattern is a very specific fucking word. I've never seen a blue child. It's a pattern. I mean, is he saying, well, I didn't do it monthly so then that's not a pattern is that what he's saying i mean fuck this guy this is what i mean this is so uh the trial court doesn't address whether the statute was unconstitutionally vague because the facts of this the facts of the

whole thing weren't even presented yet so they're like well how do we know if that relates to this because we haven't even seen the evidence yet so they don't even they don't end up they say basically we're going to set that aside not even look at it trial starts november 8th 1993 uh this is pretty quick here i mean that's you know a few months uh they it's start oh my god they have videotaped testimony of the five-year-old oh no oh no oh no is right but oh yeah for him because that is damning as fuck yeah you oh my god did they like give her a doll and a knife no they they just had her talk and she's five and uh she is you know her name's tiffany she's a cute little girl she said quote mommy has a t on her tummy she saw the cut man she said uh it's it's insane that's fucking She said, Mommy has blood here and was pointing to spots on her.

She said she rubbed her chest then. She died. She said, quote, Mommy has two owies here and pointing to her arms on the picture. They provided her with a picture to point to. Good Christ, man. To say where they saw the thing. Did you watch it? No, no, no.

I didn't see it. It's from 1993. I don't think they have it. I don't want to want to watch that it's heartbreaking it's hard enough to say and read it about a woman that drowned her daughter and then the son testified against her and it's fucked i've seen those the kids so tough when the doctor uh uh asked they asked him what caused the wounds uh tiffany said quote bill did with a. Bill did because he was mad at mommy. Then she said, quote, my mommy died. Bill died her, which is the fucking saddest thing I've ever heard in my life.

And that is just goddamn horrible. If you're a jury at that point, not only do you want to convict him, you want to fucking take him apart yourself after you're done hugging that kid. You want to go take that fucking person apart. would want to rip him one of those men in black flashy yeah just to fix that little girl because she's fucked fucked up she's fucked yeah she's that's that's ruined how would you not be that's you're in therapy forever if you saw your mother get brutally chopped up in front of you where the fuck is will smith this is dexter you know this is exactly dexter it's the same exact thing uh because of this the state has to present a lot of evidence of domestic violence they get two people to testify about the uh the neighbor that testified that she called hearing you know i'm gonna smash you i'm gonna beat you up and all that shit uh they get her

they get uh they get uh other people they get another neighbor that's heard something being smashed against a wall again uh then uh they they get uh all sorts of people to other people that say uh that they hadn't personally witnessed it but she told them about it a couple friends of hers and then uh and they admit that a lot of this is hearsay evidence but she's not here to testify but she's told consistent things to several different people. So they take that for what it is. He objects to the hearsay evidence during the trial, but they say we're going to have it anyway. The evaluator from those custody hearings testifies and says, yeah, she told me this, this, this and that.

I helped her get restraining orders against him. She said, you know, he beat me up while I was pregnant and all that. him. She said, you know, he beat me up while I was pregnant and all that. The court hears about her getting hit with a can and being choked because she refused to have sex with them. They hear about the orders of protection that she sought, every single

one. They hear the whole sordid tale that we put out in the beginning. They hear everything. They hear about the prisoner that he was, the inmate that he was in with, came and testified saying, oh, he said he was going to do her in. Oh, boy. A parade of people said he used to beat the shit out of her all the time.

Another parade going, yeah, he said he was going to kill her. Yep, he said he killed her. Yep, said he was going to kill her repeatedly. He testifies. He does. This guy has the sack to get up there and fucking testify and think he's going to talk his way out of this shit or at least talk his way into a lesser sentence. His goal is to get his goal is to get manslaughter on the bill. That's what he wants.

If he provides enough evidence saying that it was a heat of passion, whatever thing, then they'll ask the jury to consider manslaughter as well at the end. And that's his goal through this trial, because he has no other fucking no recourse. The kids saw him do it. He told everybody he did it. They never found the knife but that doesn't fucking matter talking motherfucker that's the thing he never shuts up he's a real asshole he's just his junior behavior to the max uh at the trial he admitted killing her on the

stand uh but he denied that he premeditated the murder even though he told everyone he was going to kill her asked for a knife carried the the knife out, the whole thing. He claimed the killing occurred in the heat of passion. Also on the stand, first in his testimony, he says that Lantman gave him the knife. And then later on, he says, no, I stole it from him. So that's what you want to do on the stand. Catch your own self in lies. That can only help you. Change your story under oath.

Change your, especially big things like where you got a knife from. The actual murder weapon. Yeah, try to put someone else in it with you and then when no one believes you go, never mind, I just did it myself. Yeah, it's fine. This is what he testified happened. He said that he left Lantman and Lewis. He went to Count's apartment intending only to vandalize either Catherine Weddle's car

or the car of the man whom he suspected that she was seeing. So he said, i just went over there to fuck up a car like a 16 year old or a woman in a country song i didn't do it to you know i wasn't gonna do anything else i'm gonna write fire dick across yeah that's all across the trunk of a caprice i was gonna i was gonna write feel the burn across his hood see how we like that so uh he says instead uh he got to count's apartment about 10 p.m he said there was no cars present so he's like fuck now what do i do i have nothing to vandalize so instead he said i'll just break the front window fuck it uh front door window i'll just

break that which you want to do in a place where your kids stay you want to have a an easy entry point for people to break in and you know steal your child or at minimum nobody hears the glass breaking now there's glass on the floor yeah toddlers yeah so that's what you want you're 11 month old they love to crawl at that age and uh guess what's bad glass on the floor so he banged on the window uh he banged on the window in the door with the butt of the knife he said the one he took from latman's house but the window didn't break jesus christ that's crazy a light came on in the apartment. You know, you wake people up if you bang on their windows with fucking knives. So counts came to the door.

She said he says that counts let him into the apartment. When he entered the apartment, he said he had the knife concealed under his jacket. So right away, that tells me that's some pre something. You're hiding a knife from her. That's a bad thing. You're not letting her know what you have with you. Not at all, especially that it's dangerous and especially dangerous to her. He then testifies that once he let him into the apartment, they sat and talked.

He said they were just talking. Everything was fine. He said that his daughter and Count's young son were both awake and that he rocked his to sleep, and then he put his daughter in Count's son's bed, I guess. Put his daughter and her son to bed. They both went to bed. He happened to whisper something about dick sores? I think he said, I got the biggest dick sores in town, sweetheart. And then laid her down.

Like, I tell my daughter every night. By the way, I have to say happy birthday to my daughter who is 17 this week. Oh, Jesus. The day after this comes out, she's 17. Unbelievable. She is awesome and she's doing great and I'm happy she's made it this far. Good job, kid. Well, good for you.

Yeah, good for me. We've kept her on. Yeah, we've kept her from falling apart. Drawing wind for 17 years. Yeah, she's doing good. She does well in school and she's a good kid and she knows she's not going to endure panhandle behavior. Good. So this is good.

Don't allow any man to hit you, Madison. No, she knows fucking that better. She has a nasty right cross because I taught her. And a cousin that carries steak knives. Yeah, and a cousin that carries steak knives, and she knows to kick balls and punch faces. She knows kick balls and punch noses, and I've taught her well, and she's good. Between her dad and her uncle, she has 12 foot 8 of man. Giant people.

Yeah. Angry people. Right. So Billy says that even though he was drunk at the time, he was feeling comfortable there. He said he was feeling, quote, at home again, sitting in his usual chair in his usual spot with the kids around. He said it felt like he lived there again and he felt like they were a family again. He said during this time he took his jacket off and placed it and the knife under his chair.

Because, you know, there's kids on the floor. So you want the small ones are asleep. But still, he takes his knife in the jacket, puts it under the chair. It's going to put it all away for a minute. Everything's going so well here. Yeah. So after the kids were put to bed, which is about 15 minutes after he got there, he said counts tells Billy that she didn't want to spend that she didn't want to spend Easter,

which is also their daughter's birthday with him. So she says she wants to take the daughter and she wants to spend Easter with another man. And she said she wanted the daughter to be with her and this other man on Easter slash her birthday. And this is her first birthday, too. So he is, you know, he's upset about that. My chlamydia and your herpes. This place smells terrible.

It's fucking awful in here. Get out of here. There's no birthday at all. This is going to be a bad bird. That cake is going to be toxic. We don need that happening so nobody make the cake so uh he and i could see that being a discussion but i want to see my daughter on easter and my and her birthday and her saying well i'm just that's that's a discussion that normal adult parents might have and work out amicably like adults you know what i mean some shit like that uh but uh after this all happened

uh he said that the mood completely shifted and he felt shocked and hurt and he said that he was crying at this point he was so sad he's just his feelings are hurt jimmy uh he then tells uh he says that uh that counts told him told billy jr that she'd been seeing another man during the period that they were still romantically involved but but when she was serving time in jail, when he was serving time in jail. Remember when you were in jail for assaulting that cop? Remember that when you slugged that cop? Well, I was banging this other guy. She's telling him that, which he already knew.

He's a nice guy, and I've got chlamydia. He knows that she's fucking somebody else. Somebody else, yeah, unless he had chlamydia to begin with. Billy then asked her whether she had contracted chlamydia from the man who she was seeing while he was in jail. She responded that she didn't, that it was somebody else, and that she told Billy Jr. that she had contracted chlamydia, yeah, from a different man.

So now there's other people involved in this that he didn't know about. Billy said that he was hurt and angry because he felt that she'd been lying to him uh about everything which they don't live together they're not married they're not together they're on and off and you beat the shit out of her you have no claim to this woman i'm sorry responsibility to tell you her sex life fuck no nothing uh so he says uh he he was so hurt and so angry and he was so overwhelmed by this feeling of rage that he'd been lied to that

his only response that he could possibly do was to grab the knife. He grabbed the knife and he stabbed counts in the heart and he threw her on the floor and slashed her. He said, that's all he said. He did. That's it. No, that's right. He said that he test.

He testifies that he watched her die. He didn't seek any medical help because they asked her, did you see, did you watch her die? Did you make sure she died? Yup. Did you seek medical help? they asked her, did you see, did you watch her die? Did you make sure she died? Yup. Did you seek medical help? Nope. Which is a bad sign.

He said he left the apartment, locked the door behind him. Wow. Made sure to lock it all up behind him, you know, make it nice and clean. Left the fucking kids there. Yeah. You know, didn't think twice about that. Threw the knife in the gutter and just made his way back to Lantman's house and casually said, yeah, fucking killed her.

Let's play some cards. That's a shit story. She is knifed to fucking. She's nice. Yeah, he didn't. He didn't. He just said he slashed her a little bit when he as he pushed her to the ground. He didn't say, oh, yeah, deep stab wound in her ass and I slashed her up and I fucking

her clothes are all cut up and I oh, yeah, I carved a giant letter in her stomach that her daughter didn't see. Yeah, for no reason. A capital t this is insane uh wow uh he also admits to leaving the children in the apartment with the body which is crazy uh he said he said that the total time he was at the apartment was between 30 and 45 minutes so he went in and completely destroyed everybody's life in 30 to 45 minutes and left, locked the door behind him nice and clean, chucked the knife in the gutter, went and played some cards like it never fucking happened.

Mother of three kids, including his own. No feeling for it at all. Close of the trial. The court concludes that Billy Jr. had presented sufficient enough evidence to warrant an instruction to the jury on the lesser included offense of first degree manslaughter for intentionally causing the death in the heat of passion. This is a big deal here. The court, however, refused Billy's request to give an instruction to the jury, which is a special instruction, which talks about the absence of heat of passion as an element of premeditated first degree murder. So they're saying that, yeah, the absence of it, the absence of the heat of passion.

It's weird. He wants them to tell the jury if there's no heat of passion, then that's an element for premeditated first degree murder. So they're saying by the opposite trend, if there's heat of passion, the presence of heat of passion means that it can't be a first degree murder if it's if not having it means it is that they're trying to play it like that it can have both right that's the thing they're not mutually exclusive and legally that's a horseshit argument that he's trying to make here uh the the way they have it listed in the law there they say a person is guilty of manslaughter in the first degree when the person intentionally causes the death of another person person in the heat of passion provoked by such words or acts of another as would provoke a person of ordinary self-control under like circumstances so it's basically would that make a reasonable person snap it's basically up to 12 jurors would that make you

snap if they said i just killed your, would you kill that person then? And you go, fuck yeah. And then that would be considered, that's manslaughter. That's not murder. You know, that's what it is. But I want to spend Easter with my new boyfriend. Doesn't fucking qualify. Sorry.

Everybody's still healthy in the family? I mean, apart from my fiery dick and the clam? You're not in danger? Right. Your life isn't in danger in danger right your life isn't your daughter's life isn't in danger that's the only two things that are okay here your life your daughter's life are in danger otherwise fuck you uh billy also uh requested that the trial uh give the two jury different jury instructions like we talked about that distinguishes between first

degree premeditated murder and first degree manslaughter. They gave a lesser one here. The state objected to instructing the jury, arguing it was a misstatement of Minnesota law, because it is. Because like I just said, you can't just say one's the opposite because one is. That doesn't make sense. That's flawed logic is what that is. So December 1st, 1993, finally the trial's over. Everything's done.

There is eight hours of deliberation, which is not a lot. Yeah, it's not a lot of deliberation. That's enough to, when there's 10 counts and you have, that's not just like murder or. It's less than an hour each count. Yeah, but that's true. That's actually true. You would think, I mean, like if it was just one count first degree murder, this would probably be cut and dry pretty quick. But the fact that there's 10 counts, they actually have to go through them all and discuss

them. After eight hours of deliberations, he is found guilty. Shocker on all counts, except for count two, which is a first degree murder while committing criminal sexual misconduct and also the lesser included offense of first degree manslaughter because they knocked him on all the first degree murders gotcha so they didn't get him on the sexual assault they didn't prove that there was a sexual so they were trying to say that he raped her with the knife they were trying to say that that because it was in the region of her but it wasn't in like the genital region it was in the actual like buttock area but they were saying that it was close enough to where i mean honestly he could

have been aiming for that to me that was that is what that was that was an attempt at some sort of sexual degradation and degradation and you did this to me i'm doing this to you exactly but an asshole but he's bad at it but the jury just took it as we're not positive on that one and we're banging him on fucking eight other counts including like three first degree murders so it's good enough you should just be real thankful he missed. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. That's true, actually. Now, February 7th, 1994 is sentencing here.

Okay. So obviously he's begging. They're pleading for him. There's no death penalty on the table, but life is on the table. That's enough. That's enough. The defense attorney here said, quote, this incident occurred when the defendant was intoxicated. It was spontaneous.

It was a spontaneous and isolated incident. And he has extreme remorse. Isolated from what? He hasn't killed every other woman he's encountered. Like, what is this? This is exactly the fucking pattern of what he does. There's the word pattern. I just used it.

I know what it means. Number one. And number two, fuck you. This is an is an isolated i don't isolated or not you stabbed a woman a shitload of times the thing about it doesn't need to be a lot of those the thing about murdering somebody you can only do it once that's the thing to them you've beat the holy fuck out of her so many times just because he didn't kill her last time this is isolated this is the escalation of it this is what it goes to you take a little more you take a little more and then you fucking kill that's what happens that's that's why they have that law right because it's happened so fucking often uh it's crazy but uh the uh this by the way is the judge this is good hugh county

district judge raymond pavlix uh this sentence is this sentencing is his final judicial act before retiring. Oh boy. He could give a fuck. Yeah, he doesn't care. How much before you go home would you like to say, yeah, that last case there was a fucking scumbag who beat up his girlfriend, murdered her severely, and

left her with three bloody kids crawling all over her. Boy, did I make a statement. And I got to fuck him right up the asshole, and it felt good. You know that happened. Guess who didn't miss? Guess who didn't miss? This guy. Those cuffs are fucking accurate every time.

Boom. Shit. Guess who didn't miss? His cellmate. Yeah. So he ends up, he pleads for mercy. Billy Jr. saying that he deeply regretted his actions, is what he said, and he was very sorry.

He made this mitigating statement. Sure. And the judge says back to him, this is wonderful, and like I said, he's got to feel good about this being his last thing he ever did. He says, quote, I heard you say you were sorry, but the conduct you displayed that evening that resulted in all of these charges

is beyond the court's comprehension, including leaving those children there after killing the victim. You, sir, may most certainly fuck off. And he gives him life imprisonment for the first degree murder. Fifty eight months to run concurrently for committing the criminal sexual conduct in the second degree. conduct in the second degree and one year in addition for endangering a child and another year and a day for violating his probation that he was on for assaulting a police officer when he fucking started this whole thing. He's been hit him with some Kenny Power shit. Guess who?

Both of us are going home forever, motherfucker. That's right. No shit. Oh, it's a big fuck off thing. He will be eligible for parole in a little over 30 years. So that's about that's about 2024, which is life with, though, coming up. That's coming up. That's coming up about six years.

This guy's eligible for parole, which is nuts. Unless he fucks up. Yeah. No shit. Count's mother, Mary Poole, made a comment here. She just said, I hope, quote, I hope the next woman that cries for help. Somebody will listen. No fucking shit. Now, on appeal here he appeals this obviously uh he argues that first of all the court uh abused its discretion when it refused to instruct the jury exactly how he wanted to

about something ridiculous uh he said that they they should have been told lies and horseshit that, you know, because it's the opposite. It's the same basically here. He says, as a matter of fact, that the court's refusal entitles him to a new trial because the failure to instruct the jury pursuant to what he wanted effectively relieved the state of proving beyond a reasonable doubt an element to first degree intentional murder billy did not act in the heat of passion therefore billy claims that his due process rights were violated uh the court the appeals court does not agree with that uh they say they conclude the jury instructions given to the trial uh by the trial court uh when viewed as a whole adequately instructed the jury as to the state's burden of proof i would say so would say so. They also go on to say that in this case, Billy and Counts had a romantic relationship, lived together,

were parents of a one-year-old daughter. Relationship deteriorated, lived apart. On the evening of the murder, the relationship was, quote, subjected to heightened emotional strain. Counts disclosed to Billy Jr. she may have caused him to be infected with a sexually transmitted disease that she had been seeing other men and she was romantically involved while she was romantically

involved with Billy and that she planned to spend Easter with the and the daughter's first birthday with another man. So there's nothing. Yeah. They're putting all this up. They're saying in response, he testified that he felt hurt, shock, anger. The trial court concludes that the testimony was not so unworthy of belief that no rational jury would be entitled to believe it and that the jury might have reasonably inferred that Billy Jr. intended to kill Counts in the heat of passion. Based on the conclusion, the court did not submit the jury instruction in the lesser.

Basically, they say, after all this, a trial court's refusal to give a particular jury instruction constitutes error only if the trial court abused its discretion they're saying they didn't abuse its discretion this uh instruction lies within the broad discretion of the court sure so fuck off is what he's saying uh now still dead bro that's the problem it doesn't fuck and they're saying they go into the whole thing the absence of heat of a passion is not is not an enumerated element of first premed first degree murder on the content it's just this whole it's a it's illegal this is why people go to law school so they can sit and go

well if this means this then this must mean that but it doesn't then we can interpret it and argue about it for fucking years until it goes to the supreme court and they decide whatever it means you still took a mother from three children. That's the bottom line, and that's not debatable. Either way. And it's funny because it's not like, this is a guy where you look at and there's no doubt that he did it. There's no doubt why he did it.

There's no doubt about any of it. We don't need this fucking guy. We just don't. That should be the, appeals court decides, we don't need this fucking guy. Goodbye. That's it. kick him off of there can we pay that judge double for a day just to come back and say that yeah can we do that just for one day i want to hear him say you sir may fuck off i really want that again in in starker terms at least till 26 yeah yeah definitely 24

something 24 yeah yeah six years away. There you go. Perfect. So, yeah, 24. They conclude that when, as in this case, the defendant is charged with premeditated murder and sufficient evidence is adduced at trial for a jury reasonably to infer that the defendant caused the death of another person in the heat of passion provoked by such words, act, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

They say that everything is fine with that and he can fuck off now the next point is the juicy one and the one that's important because it is a direct challenge to the domestic violence law basically if he wins this if this goes all the way to supreme state supreme court and this goes over it's gonna it's gonna fuck up this law bad so that's what he's doing there's a one meager protection for these fucking poor people in this situation. He wants to dismantle it for his own fucking deal here. For a guy that fucking is a domestic violence fucking guy. Clearly.

Violator. He argues that the statute violates due process because the term pattern, as in past pattern of domestic dispute, like abuse is unconstitutionally vague. They conclude that the statute is not impermissibly vague in all of its applications. They considered the issue in two different homicide cases from the past here. The statute says any person who causes the death of a human being while committing domestic abuse, when the perpetrator has engaged in a past pattern of domestic abuse upon the victim and the death occurs under circumstances manifesting an extreme indifference to human life. I say that he fits that like a fucking glove. Like, you can't fit that any better.

It's a perfect description of him. What part was vague? I mean, that's what I mean. Wordy as fuck. That's not vague at all the past pattern of domestic abuse upon the victim which is pretty clear the intent it's it's intentionally vague that's the point it's intentionally meant that you can interpret it in a number of different ways right it's not supposed to be a law can't be specific to the way you domestically disturb somebody and that's how people attack laws and appeals is they're going to very specifics which in some cases needs to be done but not in this one

it seems pretty specifically vague you know what i mean it's specific in its vagueness absolutely and they go through the fact that a lot of the assaultive behavior uh before before the murder uh was presented as hearsay evidence uh that's a thing. They said that he challenged the admissibility of it there, but then he failed to do so in the in the in the appeals court. So they said that they have no way of he doesn't even challenged it. So like that, that has to come in and just fine here. And that definitely demonstrates the past pattern of domestic abuse. Absolutely.

They talked about five people testifying about instances of physical abuse over just small two-year window it's not that much for christ's sake uh the domestic abuse including physical harm bodily injury assault or infliction of fear of imminent physical harm bodily injury or assault between family or household members that all seems pretty fucking yeah pretty uh whatever they said the court didn't, however, provide the jury with a definition of the term pattern. They said that that's a thing here. They said that they conclude that Counts and Billy Jr. were considered family or household members

because he was saying they weren't. Also, that's required by the statute. And also that Billy and Counts had periodically resided together by the fact that they had a child in common also that's another one that puts it in the domestic category uh they say that uh they were together on and off they got engaged in acts of violence toward her made terroristic threats against her uh the the acts of domestic abuse uh is defined under the statutes they basically say it's exactly what's defined under the statutes so much documentation between behind between the the hot dish against the wall the yeah

the hair everything the cross-eyed cricket yeah there's so many different there's so many different times that he has beat the living fuck out of this woman so he can say how can he consider this is not a pattern well let's see how they decide with what's a court says what fucking intelligent hopefully people would say here uh they said that uh they they think he did uh engage in a past pattern of domestic abuse they say therefore billy jr's behavior was clearly prescribed by the domestic abuse homicide statute and billy jr cannot successfully challenge the statute is unconstitutionally vague as uh as they did in they talk about in another case, holding that the appellant could not bring successful vagueness challenge

to domestic homicide statute because the appellant's behavior evidenced a past pattern of domestic abuse under any reasonable circumstances, any reasonable definition of the term pattern. Therefore, we affirm, take a fucking hike, asshole. Terrific. So he's gone. There's a lot of words to say. Fuck you, asshole. Which is basically all they said. That's what they wanted's gone. There's a lot of words to say. Fuck you, asshole.

Which is basically all they said. That's what they wanted to say. That's what they really wanted to say. Now, Daylene counts. Daylene May counts as her full name. She is buried at the Conrad Memorial Cemetery. That is in Kalispell, Montana, actually, in Flathead County, Montana.

She moved to State Over. Yeah, she moved to State Over. I guess that's where she was from. Get away from that phone. Yeah. Billy Jr.'s dickhead ass over here. Yeah, maybe that's her family taking her home. He is currently residing at the Minnesota Correctional Facility at Lino Lakes.

No kidding. Hopefully mispronouncing it and being harassed for it constantly. Jesus Christ. By the way, on this website, R website rap sheets.org uh the minnesota corrections department has 3.5 out of 5 stars not bad i don't know who's it's a great experience the fingerprints they wiped them off my hands after they did it they washed my nobody raped me that was nice it was great i had a good time there had some good camaraderie with the fellas and everything was fine i would get a DUI again to come back here.

It was terrific. Now, it says that he is later. That was when he was convicted. It said he's up for parole in 30 years. On his actual inmate thing, it says that his inmate profile, it says that his sentence is life. Right. But to contact his caseworker to find out more information on his projected date and shit like that. It's not publicly released, I think, because this is a guy

people want to fucking lynch. I would assume maybe they're keeping it secret. So, in case you want to find out, and maybe tell his caseworker that you think he's a piece of shit, that maybe, you know, whatever, you can do that. Her name is Elise Hammer, which is a great name for a case where you're going to drop the hammer

on you. Phone number 651-717-6551. I don't know if I'm legally allowed to do that or not, but fuck this guy. He's a piece of fucking shit. I'm sorry. What you did is sucks, mister, and fuck you. I don't care. I hope a lot of people call this lady and say fucking, I don't know.

I don't know what you could say to make it worse for him, but say, when's he getting out? Don't let him out, please. I don't know. I don't know what you could say to make it worse for him but say when's he getting out? Don't let him out please. I don't know. She has no control over that I realize but maybe she can pass along. For some reason thousands of people are calling me saying not to pass it on to the parole board maybe. I don't fucking know. Hopefully he wouldn't get out on his first parole. You would think not right? After that? After murdering a woman in that fashion? Oh you

might need his homicide court file number which is good you dash two five K nine nine three zero zero zero four six nine. So you'll need to reference that also there to do that. So he is rotting there, hopefully for longer than six more years because poor Dailene has nowhere to go. And we don't know anything about what happened to her kids or anything like that. Hopefully they've been kept private.

Hopefully they went with her parents and hopefully there's a... Hopefully they've been just kept private and kept kind of out of this whole thing and hopefully that poor little girl got some fucking help. The other two were probably too young to realize what was going on. The 11-month-old doesn't know shit. Bill died mommy, bro. That was a phrase she said.

She will be fucked up. I'm talking the other one. The three-year- mommy bro that was a phrase she will be fucked up i'm talking the other one the three-year-old that's a questionable one she'll probably forget about it maybe be a little weird but uh the 11 month old will be fine the five-year-old god knows that poor girl i hope they've helped her because she is 30 now that girl she's 30 years old she is a 30 year old woman and and I hope that she's gotten whatever the counseling she needs to get through that shit. Wow. That's another one of those cases where we have to say, we don't know what the right

thing to do is in that situation because we're men and we're fucking, we're not, we have no training in this. We're comedians. This is when it comes up that we're not journalists. We're not attorneys. We're not, we're comedians. We don't, we're not caseworkers. We're not police officers. I'm also not a woman hitter that's the other thing well i mean i don't know what to

do if you're a woman in that situation we're not the guys tell you go do this and go do that we don't know be safe try to get away we don't know we don't know we don't know what the best thing to do is i mean trust ask for help from people you trust i believe you have people who knows because people that don't have who knows man, man? It's so fucking horrible and it makes me just... It's bad. It makes me a very... It's cringeworthy, the whole thing. It really is. It's terrible. If you

also find it cringeworthy, what you can do about it is give us five stars on iTunes or Apple Podcasts there. That would be terrific. That won't help the dead, but it will help the living who talk about the dead. It's true. So do that.

Please give us five stars. Tell us you're following instructions and directions or whatever you want to do. It doesn't matter because it's not for our egos, honestly. Do that. Also, you can go to shutupandgivememurder.com. Get your tickets to all those crazy upcoming live shows. We have some doozy cases for those, man. Oh, some good ones.

I can't wait. So please, please go get those. Come see those shows, goddamn. Absolutely. They for those, man. Oh, some good ones. I can't wait. So please, please go get those. Come see those shows, God damn it. Absolutely. They sold out last time. They're going to happen.

They're going to sell out. It's going to happen again. Hopefully. Well, some of them will. We're so close. Minnesota sold out. They sold out like the second day.

Like, pre-sale happened and they bought all the tickets that were available for pre-sale immediately. And then two days later, regular sale happened and within 48 hours they were sold out completely. Like, you guys are the best we can't wait to come to minnesota even in december like

maniacs bring me some of that wisconsin squeaky cheese fucking buy a parka for that shit but i'll be there god damn it freezing cold it doesn't matter the plane lands that's let's just hope the plane lands and then takes back off again it takes me back to arizona where it'll be nice and warm de-ice that goddamn thing. Jesus Christ. Spray that antifreeze on it. We're going to spend a lot of time on runways. Also at shutupandgivememurder.com

you can find all the merch, all the new t-shirts on there. Check it out. Lots of cool stuff on there. Also you can find links to donate and be a superstar producer. You can do that, like I said, follow the links that take you to

patreon.com slash crime in sports, or you can go over to PayPal and make a one-time donation using crime in sports at gmail.com, which is also another thing you can do on there is you can follow us at smalltownmurder on Instagram, at murdersmall on Twitter,

smalltownpod on Facebook. But never mind all that, Jimmy. I want you to tell me a group of people who are super heroic who have never murdered a person and left toddlers to crawl on them we know of our producers let's hope not and if they have we've still taken your money and thank you for it jimmy hit me with that list this week's executive producers are conley oh shit conley conley armstrong pamela rogers andrew bryan and spence carmen barajas uh chrissy ann costaldi again she's the best isn't she fantastic she's so cool thank you fucking ridiculous ashley beal billy uh billy bob archer yvonne abraham taste and lisa

coltrane thank you guys so much guys you guys are our life's blood, our heart and soul, and we can't do it without you. We really can't. Or any of these people. Those guys, wow, you're extra generous. Thank you. Happy birthday, Daryl Wilkins. I fucking, Miss Huskins sent a donation to say something to this guy. Oh, yeah. And then that was like three weeks ago. Oh, well, happy birthday. We're sorry.

He didn't know that I really wanted him to have a happy birthday. So next year, Daryl, fucking crush it. Have a whole happy year. Never mind the one day. Happy whole year. Right. Nick laying the cock, because every time I see it, it makes me fucking, I'm so happy

for him. Kate Ives, Emily Cobb, Natalie Hodson, Jessica Manor, Karen Weiss, Justin Inwood, Jessica McKinney, Tim Sparling, Jason Hamming, Craig McGeechan, Alice with no last name, Jake LaBeer, Whitney Leonard, Keith Caswell, Thomas Edward Desmore, Julie Sackett, Peyton Meadows, I said Keith Caswell, God damn it, Jeremy Cucciara, Captain Surly, Martina Lee Luonga. She's the best. Yeah, we met her in San Francisco. She said she's coming to our San Francisco show again at Cobbs.

What a cool lady. Really nice. We can't wait to see her again. Give her a nice hug. Emmy Dumont, Misty Beganat, Deanna Trippi, or Tri-Pi. It might be Tri-Pi, right? Ooh, that's nice. Wasn't that in the Nerd nerds movie wasn't the

tri-pies or was that it was animal house try lambs tri-pies was the girls though oh yeah that's right i was thinking of them they're the try the lambdas right uh aaron hammond uh rocks of joy danielle graham michelle terry photography uh jeanette keel tupperware by jason that's fascinating interesting i didn't know that shit was still being sold wow okay and dudes buy his tupperware dudes are in it all right ashley vo she is so fucking wonderful she's great heather goss uh jeanette smith kate myers ulysses grant parm i don't know i'll have a a union general parmesan please i'm in what is the meat and i don't know but i'm curious asshole wasn't he an asshole so asshole parmesan he was at the union can i get some asshole parmesan at least he wasn't for

slavery that's a good point scott sagal uh nathan little nicola elliott ariana fulsome she's wonderful yeah thank you hannah simmons stina stina gunnarsson uh James Fraker, Meg Smith. She's up in Detroit. She's fantastic as well. Victoria Brody, Sandy Handjob, which is my favorite fucking ever. Favorite Bart Simpson call-in. Barbara Johnson, Barbara Felker, Ashley Powell, Shauna Bracelton. Shane Raley donated both with Patreon and got into fucking PayPal also. Wow.

Well, thank you so much. Thank you, Shane. Bam Stroker. That is my favorite so far. Well, that's always fun. David Clark. Martina Kunkel. I said Ashley Powell, I believe.

Robert West. Mariah Menhir. I try so hard to roll the R's with that Dutch shit. Janelle Kelsey. I fucking nailed it, too. That's where she's from, right? She's Dutch. I think, yeah, yeah. I got it she's from, right? She's Dutch. I think.

Yeah. Got it. Hey. All right. Where did I go? Lauren Demerath up in Chicago. Thank you, Lauren. Heather Rylander, Georgia and Jackson.

Savannah Briand or Brian. I think it's Briand. Rob Roberts, which is fucking brutal, man. I'm so sorry, Bob Roberts. Bob Roberts. Better than Carson Carson. It is. Liz Ingalls. Ava. Ava Shinakova, Jesse Hartman, Axis Apparel.

They are fantastic. Go buy their shit. Jillian Tuba, Kay Overbay, Jacob Schrag, John Joseph, Mary Carmody Trotman, Ron Bosch, Under the Sea Fabrics, Emily Koch, Gisela Garamundi. Fucking, I knew i was gonna i saw this i i was i'm gonna fucking knock this out i read in my head like seven times uh gisella garm gisella god damn it gisella you were psyched up yeah i was gisella garmendoza garmin bozia uh dada fleischer that's her name uh bryant Beth Marcinko. Patrick Kelly.

Hannah Turley. Lisa Bayless. Lisa Williams. Michael Lafazia. Ryan Bear. Or Beer. It's Bear. Brenda Parsons.

Allie Lewis. Braylon Guerrero. She lives here in Phoenix. She's come to so many shows. Awesome. Brian Ford. Taisha S. No, Taisha J.

Fuck. Handwriting problem there. That's not on you. That's on Jimmy's handwriting. That's, Taisha S. No, Taisha J. Fuck. Handwriting problem there. That's not on you. That's on Jimmy's handwriting. No, that's me being an idiot. Naomi James, Samantha Ballard, Richard Shoman, Christy Davis, Corey Herman, Hannah Reeder, Corey, no, it's Cody Levine, Indiana Quillion. No, Quillion.

Wow. Your face, you really were like, oh, no, I'm in trouble halfway through that. D with no name, no last name, just D. And Richard McCutcheon. You guys, Richard McCutcheon. I can't thank you guys enough for everything you do for us. Thank you. Thank you, folks, so much. We can't do it without you. We say it all the time. You've done everything for us. Thank you so much for giving us a life in comedy that we enjoy and that is not otherwise worth it. No, we built a studio and a house that we got.

You guys gave this to us. Thank you. It's fucking fantastic. On a silver platter. So we're going to keep trying as hard as we possibly can for you guys every damn week. Every damn week, we're just going to do it as well as we possibly can. And what if they wanted to tell you about how well you can do it, Jimmy? How could they do that?

You can find me at Wisman Sucks, W-H-I-S-M-A-N Sucks on Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat. And thank you guys. This week has been really tremendous hearing the different ways that you guys spend time listening to this. It's bananas.

The stories are so fucking incredible. We love that. We love hearing that. And also, too, we really dig those stories where it's like you're telling us, oh, I'm having a shit time right now. You'd think people don't like to hear you complain. When you say, I'm having a shit time, and thank you that these podcasts get me through

it, and I get a laugh out of it, and it cheers me up some, that's awesome. Because we all have that go-to thing that makes us smile, whether it's whatever you watch on Netflix that you watched when you were 12 that was funny funny or whatever the hell your thing is, your happy place. My thing is those messages. We're some people's happy place. Those are what get me through it. Yeah. It's so fucking great.

We love that shit. We love when you tell us on Twitter, man, that was funny this week, or you shout out a joke, or you just tell us you like the episode, or that you just don't tell us you hate us. We're like, awesome. That's great. I can't believe it. I like when they tell me that, but where can they tell you that? They can tell me that.

At Jimmy P is funny. You can do that or copy and paste my last name from the show description if you don't want to be a hero and try to spell it like a crazy person. Do that. Come back.

See us each and every goddamn week because we'll keep coming back each and every week. We'll see you on the road. And until next week, it's been our pleasure. Bye. Bye. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Small Town Murder early and ad-free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today.

Or you can listen early and ad-free with Wondery Plus and Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey. It's all a lighthearted nightmare on our podcast, Morbid. We're your hosts. I'm Alina Urquhart. And I'm Ash Kelly. And our show is part true crime, part spooky, and part comedy. The stories we cover are well-researched.

He claimed and confessed to officially killing up to 28 people. With a touch of humor. I'd just like to go ahead and say that if there's no band called Malevolent Deity, that is pretty great. A dash of sarcasm and just garnished a bit with a little bit of cursing. This mother****er lied. Like a liar. Like a liar. And if you're a weirdo like us and love to cozy up to a creepy tale of the paranormal.

Or you love to hop in the Wayback Machine and dissect the details of some of history's most notorious crimes. You should tune in to our podcast, Morbid. Follow Morbid on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to episodes early and ad-free by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts.