SmartLess - “Jimmy Kimmel: LIVE in Los Angeles”

Episode Date: August 31, 2023

Night Nurse Jimmy Kimmel prepares our warm milk and rocks our 6-City-Tour to beddybyeeeeee, LIVE from Los Angeles. (Recorded Feb. 12, 2022)See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Testing. Testing, testing, testing. Testing. Testing. Is it hot? Is it hot? Is it hot? Testing 1-2.

Testing 1-2. Testing 1-2. Testing 1-2. Oh, look at Euras. Oh. Okay, wait. So wait. I got a really quick game. It's called Quick, Quick, Quick.

Okay. And I'm going to say, Quick, Quick, Quick, and I'm going to say, name three something, right? Okay. So for you, if so, quick, quick, quick, name three brands of soap. Dov, ivory, and I'm just quick. Okay, so quick, quick, name three problems, dental problems, go, name three dental problems. Oh, you've got to have access, you've got a cavity, and you've got a punch in the mouth. Okay, what about you, quick, quick, quick, three great sports teams.

Okay, what about you? Quick quick quick three great sports teams Quick the birds the dinosaur isn't that okay, oh Listen, let's just forget this let's just get down to what we came here to do the last show up Oh Yes Oh, man. It's over here. Yes. Look at this. So nice. You guys are last. You guys are last. You guys are last.

This guy owns a place. You already seen it? Yeah. This guy owns a place. He's looking to bust some heads. Yeah. It's our last show of the show. It's our last show of the show.

Oh, wow. And we're going to, this is it. We're so excited that you guys wasted your money to come here tonight. We got a money. Yeah. Right? We're going to try to put full dollar value in it. We've got a pretty good guest, not great.

Not great. Pretty good. But we've been on the roads the last couple of weeks, and we went all over the country, we started in DC, and then we went to Boston, and we went to New York, in Chicago, and Madison, Wisconsin. Oh! We had an incredible special appearance.

By my sister Tracy! Tracy! And I think that Tracy got a warmer reception than we did. Yeah, for sure. Anyway, thank you for coming here and listening. We're going to sit in the sun to show. You get there because you're guest. You're there?

I don't care. Oh, boy. Oh. You haven't sat in the center since... Since Conan. Oh, wow. So all the way back to Boston. Yeah, thank you. This is a great interview, by the way.

Yeah. No. How did you get started in show business? That's a great question. I wasn't expecting it out of you. Um... LAUGHTER Um, sorry, just before I... green.

Um... LAUGHTER Oh, what's your favorite color? No, they know. They know. All right, so I, I, you know, people are so nice to come back stage and they say nice things, all through this whole tour. Sometimes, I do think I have a little bit of face blindness, of undiagnosed face blindness, because sometimes I really truly don't recognize people

and I'm making an asset of myself. And so a quick story, I was remodeling my house and I came outside, thank you, thank you. Oh, it doesn't get any gager than remodeling your house. And so the, and I walk outside and this woman's walking down the sidewalk and she says, she goes, I love what you did with the house. I would love to see the inside of it sometime.

And I'm like, who are you? I was like, okay, like what am I supposed to do? And the conversation came and went on and I was feeling very awkward and I go, I'm sorry, do we know each other? She goes, it's Julio, your next turn, neighbor of 20 years. And then the worst comeback you could ever come up with, I go, did you change your hair? You look so good.

That's gayer. That's gayer. That's definitely gayer. Oh, and another one. This is why I think I have it, because another one during Will and Grace, remember Tracy Lorde's the porn star? Sure. No.

No. Oh. No. No. No. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. she talked quite a bit.

Yeah, actually. So she, I didn't know. So she came on as a guest, darn, willing, grace. And I'm such an idiot. She sat down. I literally said, oh my god, I loved you in the hand that rocks the cradle. I thought she was Rebecca de Mournet.

And she looked at me like, excuse me. And all I didn't even say anything, I'm like, I'm going to be right back. I get to get some water. And I just, because somebody me like, excuse me. And all I didn't even say anything, I'm like, I'm gonna be right back in a get some water. And I just, because somebody's like, that's not Rebecca de Mourne. What else? Are you happy to be done with the tour, both of you? Well, I'm happy and sad.

Huh? I'm happy and sad. What I said. What's the happy part? The happy part is that of the happy part is the... You get to answer a second. Or really, 30 seconds. No, no, no. Because he's going, Sean is about to go is that the happy part is the... You get to... We're really sure it's gonna be a happy part. Because he's going...

No. He's... Ashaan is about to go on the road for seven months to go do a play like tomorrow. And he's been doing all of this for his final week before... Yeah, cool. Thank you. Thank you.

That's very nice of you. Anybody here see Promises Promises? No, that's very nice of you to say. It's called Good Night Oscar. It opens at the Goodman Theater in Chicago and then Broadway after that. So, but that's nice. I say, no, I'm happy because I feel like it was a success.

I had a great time with you guys. I feel very happy that we did it, but sad because it'll be gone. Yeah. It could have really been a shit show, right? Yeah. We didn't know what we still don't know what the hell we're doing. And to think that people would be engaged

and entertained for half hour or full hour with us talking is stunning. And we might be blowing it right now. Right? We were doing so good up to here. I know. It went really well. Did you black out?

Did you black out for a second? I'm still out. But I think we may have pulled it off without a real stinker. I have one more embarrassing face line of story. Can I just share? Yeah, of course. So I went to the premiere screening of Transparent. Remember that TV show?

Sure. And it was before it was it was before it was on TV, it was especially event you could watch the first two episodes. It's like, oh my god, I walk up to, what's his name? Take a time. J. Duplass. J. Duplass is an amazing actor, right? Sure.

And I walk up to him, I'm like, oh my god, you were so great. You were so amazing. And he's like, oh, and I'm like, no, no, no, that was such an incredible show. I can't believe nobody's ever tackled a subject. I just went on and on and on. And I was like, you're so great.

And Scott even has been grabbed my arm. And I was like, oh, OK, well, I'll see you later. He's like, OK, he goes, that's Molly Shannon's husband, Fritz. LAUGHTER And I was like, oh, and I know Fritz very well. So, yeah. And then I, and then I was like, do I say something

to Molly and Fritz or do I not? Oh my God, it's gonna be so embarrassed because every time I see her, then it's gonna be in the back of her. You know what, I'm gonna email her. I was like, oh my God, Molly, I can't believe I thought Fritz was J.D. Plus and she emailed me back. She was like, we cannot stop laughing on the car right home.

It was pretty bad. We're getting old. We're getting old. And the brain starts to go. You guys are. I don't have any, yeah. You still play, you still, you play. I still play like 35 to 30.

Right, you really do. I don't make the rules, dude. You have no socks on it. Do you have those weird sort of hide the socks that just hide in the bottom of the shoe? No, no seams. Yeah. Right. No.

Prove it to me right now. Okay. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh. Oh. So, because those are not a good look, those little things. Isn't that what when a woman goes to try on shoes at a shoe store, high heels, they've got those little things in there. Well, men, too, dude.

Well, it looks like a, it looks like a high heel. It looks like a high heel. But they have those little like like, temporary socks for everybody. And it's not a good look for men. You either got to go without socks or put them on. Who likes the no socks look? Anybody? Thank you.

That was, like, 20 people. Good for you. I can't pull that off. Good for you. It's a... yeah, it's a very unique look. It looks like a palm... Feels like sneaker. Um. I don't know the reference. It was a commercial where women are playing basketball

and they're high heels. Yeah. Well, what was that fun? It was some shoe company. I don't know. We have a lot of fun. We have a lot of fun together. We have a lot of fun with you guys,

knowing that you guys are having fun with us. That's a true story. Thanks for listening to our garbage. Truly. Truly, we really mean it when we say we can't believe it. We're truly humbled. And that you want to get involved with us and laugh, and all the stupid shit we talk about.

Because that's what we do all the time. And we're really happy to be back here with you guys, with our family and friends, a lot of whom are here at tonight. And so we wanted, yeah, and we wanted to do a show back here in our hometown. We wanted to do a show that really was representative of how great we feel, and how grateful we are for you guys and for our hometown. We wanted to do a show that really was representative of how great we feel,

and how grateful we are for you guys and for our friends. So with that in mind, our guest tonight is someone that we all hold dear to our hearts and we love very much. He's just the funniest. He's such a good friend of ours. We just love him to death. And these got, for the first time, we all know who the guest is because we're at the end of the tour and we've invited our really good friend, our pal, the hilarious, the kind, the generous, the amazing Mr. That was sweet. Thank you. Oh, hey now. Yeah, nice. To the people. I appreciate it.

Hi, guys. You know, this guy knows how to do it. We got to get some pointers. I feel like that. I mean, that was a really nice intro. I don't think I don't appreciate it. I do appreciate it. But it did feel a little bit like mean, that was a really nice intro.

I don't think I don't appreciate it. I do appreciate it, but it did feel a little bit like, when somebody's inviting their cousin to your house, you're like, oh, he's such a great guy. You're not on so much. Don't be an asshole too. What the truth is is that, is that we mean it. Yeah, thank you.

We love you, and you're just a... Well, I love you guys, too. And I have to say, this is very exciting for me, because I've never seen Jason up this late. And by the way, if it's so important during the podcast, he just gets up and leaves, don't be surprised.

Yeah, that's every single time. Stay on one. There's no bones about it, too, right? He'll just get up and leave, and he and Amanda will often come to dinner or whatever we all know in separate cars. Yeah. So that he's got an escape pie.

Last night, he lies. He's also a liar. Yeah, sure. He lied to me last night. By the way, it's funny that this is the big surprise. I saw you guys last night. I'm going to see you again tomorrow. I know.

Yeah, I know. I know. Another. I know, yeah, yeah. Really. Another day. Bridge. Grish merch, by the way. Oh, so great. This stuff, right? What, which mall kiosk did you get this made of? And I have to say, I made fun of the hats,

but I didn't know Zazzle was making motel key chains. I don't, listen. The key chains, by the way. Guess who's the idea of the key chains? Oh, shit.chains. I don't listen. The Keychains, by the way, guess who's the idea? The Keychains. Oh, shit, that was a... Yeah. What you were. Wasn't real.

It was the real. Hang on a second. I may have said, now it's coming back to you. I may have said, key fob. That's like a mochelle. Oh, even better. What key fob? I have a Toyota Highlander.

I need a 2018 key fob. Who will he bob to some of these gym? That's, that's, I need a 2018 key fob. I told you Bob's is a new gym. That's that's I'm gonna destroy my marriage and cheat on my wife, key fob. Like what is that? Wait, wait, what's happening? Jail put that site down.

Oh, there we go. There's a key fob for the audience. A key fob is decorative. So last night, Jason, I left before you got here. I pulled a bateman, so I missed you. I got to be, honestly, I was surprised that you guys weren't there, and I thought, wow, this is really shitty of Jimmy Mollie,

not to be here tonight. Yeah, so he took off before even I did. I was tired. We came late. It was a dinner thing. So did you. But Jason, when you were, I was walking in, and then moments later you were leaving.

And I heard you were there. You said, and correct me if I misunderstood this, because I was trying to figure this out with my wife. You said, I said, you're leaving, obviously, and you said, yeah, I said, is Amanda your wife going with you? And you said, yeah, we rode together, and then you left, and then about 45 minutes later, there was Amanda. And I said, Jason said about 45 minutes later, there was Amanda.

And I said, Jason said, she's like, no, we came in separate cars. I don't remember saying that, I'm not saying that I didn't. Well, what, I didn't know what stage of the gummy that you're getting. Is that what happened? It was deep into the gummies. No, I just, I don't know what I'm saying when I'm leaving because I'm just trying to get the hell out of there.

Yeah. And not be like the dick that's saying goodbye and wrecking the thing. I learned that from you, though. By the way, what time did you get there last night? Late, I got to go. Sorry, guys, we'll be right with you. Yeah.

Jimmy, I got a poll. You have mugs, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. By all the stuff you want. So Jimmy, you were one of... You were on our show quite early on. Not as early as you should have been. Which was a big bonus contention.

But as we explained, when you were on the show... Yeah. ...the three of us, nobody knew who to add. And it became one of those like, well, when are we gonna... Well, who's gonna have Jimmy and her suit as quite late? Right. But you were on early and you were in early. It's called being taken for granted. Yes, yes.

Yes. We can always get Jimmy. Let's take a swing at something. Yeah. But you were an early listener and you were somebody you had a lot of notes. I did, yeah. I did.

I did. I still do. This interview, you're out here tonight. We are interviewing you, but we really want to know what you think about our podcast. Yeah, how we know. So it's kind of about us. Well, I will be happy to share my notes.

And first of all, I love the podcast. I honestly, no kidding around. I love listening to it. It's great because I have to say, I don't think you need guests. I don't think that. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You need me here. Thank you. Thank you.

Right, everybody. Thank you. Thank you. Exactly. Good night, everybody. Not at all. I love hearing you guys bust each other's balls. I love hearing the stories. I love... Oh, I love when you guys pretend to use the products

and the commercials. I love that. So... You know... Wait, that... Wait, are you guys... No, Will's designing his own couch at home. Yeah, of course, with all form. Don't be a dick. Did you know they make mattresses now?

Yeah. It's so crazy, right? There's a lot of stuff in there. I'm not sure if I can do it. Yeah, of course, with all form. Don't be a dick. Ha-ha-ha-ha. Did you know they make mattresses now? Yeah. It's so crazy, right? They're so comfortable. Wait, which one do I have? I've got the organic hemp stuff with hay or something in it.

You fight with your daughter over the fake chick and McNuggets? Yeah. Did I say that? Yeah, oh yeah. Listen, the checks are clearing you guys. Yeah. Do you? Jimmy, I know.

You know what, the truth, sorry, go ahead, John. Oh, yeah, no. I was going to ask a real question. Well, I just want to just, just before we finish the commercial thing, it should be noted that we actually do legit you, I'm not trying to buy back for the ad for the ad for the others. I'm really not, but we weirdly legitimately do use

the money for the ad. Three quarters of them, I think is fair. Yeah, we won't say which ones we do. Of course you do. That would be cool. Thank you. We'll design these shoes on allform.com. Enter Smart List 20 for a 20% discount.

Hey, they like our ad reads. Let me go to the rest of the show, and this is not something we have planned, but I do have some thoughts on it. One of my favorite moments in the show is right at the beginning. One of you introduces his guest, And the guest is sometimes fantastic. And sometimes they're usually pretty good. They're at least usually pretty good. Sometimes that's so great.

But there is a moment where the person who brought the guest is all on board. And then the other two are decided there's two things going through the other two's mind, which is number one, if the guest is interesting, oh, oh, oh, what were they in? What am I gonna say to this person? And then the other one is trying to mask your disappointment. So there's always like a moment of...

A lot of tension. And there's also, if you listen carefully, there's a Google search going on. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, for sure. I mean, sure. You know, what are you going to do? Well, you will have the formula of, what is it?

Formula 41, Formula 1. Just one. Just one. Just one. Yeah. And Daniel Riccardo, which is a great episode. Daniel Riccardo. Yeah.

This is like, yeah. And I, I, I, I was like, oh, oh my god. Daniel Riccardo. This is a main Ricardo. This is a name. Riccardo. Oh, he races cars. Oh, yeah, it was something like that. The word car was right in his name the whole time.

So I also believe that there's more that can be done. And I know you guys are all very busy, but I think I would love to see a segment at the end of the show where you just take You read emails from your listeners. Yes, we got man that we talked about that great done. Yeah done. We talked about that No, nice. This is early. Yeah, but have you met people? These are good people here. I mean look at this. These people go these people are good people here. I mean, look at this. These people. No, these people are good. Good save.

Well, I think that was a good save. How would you see this? I remember you guys started this podcast. Yeah. You were talking about it. And the big thing was, most of the discussion was, Bateman complaining about having to pay an editor to do this. And he's like, you know, we're doing this on our own.

You know, we're funding this whole thing, and I'm thinking, what are they funding? Zoom is free. Yeah. Microphones are $400. And how much could you be paying the editor? I mean, would it be very? No, I will say you brought up a very good point.

The fellas that make this thing fly, and you should thank right right now who are here tonight Rob Armjard Betty Barberco and Michael Grant Terry Can't see them they're can't see him. They're here, though. They're here somewhere. Without them, we'd have nothing. Yeah.

I like to. We're like, put the house on something else. Fuck you. Yes. And we will be right back. Smartlist is supported by rocket money. So Scottie and I, you know, we share credit cards. We share everything. So, and we can't, you know, we share credit cards, we share everything.

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you've got a home with no worries. Go to ADT.com today or call 1-800-ADT-AS-AP. Google Nest Cam, Nest Doorbell, and Nest Aware are trademarks of Google LLC. All right, back to the show. But what about a podcast that you're on? Are you sick of talking to people? No, I don't need a podcast.

But this is enough. Why don't you like a show where you of talking to people. No, I don't need a podcast, but... You're this is enough. Why don't you like a show where you can talk to people and interview them and stuff? What do you mean? It would be fun. It would be nice to... You know what I really like to do is to plug people's projects. That's mine. Now, limit fashion.

Imagine when you were a kid. When you were a kid, you were like, God, I just wish I could get to play. I wish. You know what? I wish I could tell. I know there's no such thing as a Netflix yet, but if there is one, one day, would you, would you, would you guest host this? Oh, this is the best.

This is my favorite part of the show. Yeah. The very, the longest questions in the world. Yeah. But not just the longest questions in the very, the longest questions in the world. But not just the longest questions in the world, but also their multiple choice. And when, and, and, sometimes they're answered within the question.

Yeah, absolutely. And the multiple choices are not ABC and D. They are just A and B. Yeah. But what if? Fuck all up. Could we, what about if I hosted your show for a week, well, you did this for a week,

then he did your show for a week, you did this. Like, would you do this for three weeks, and we took turns doing this. 100% of four of four of four. I've been here. I've been here. You think of this already? Nothing would make me happier

than hosting your show for a week. To me, you have the best job in the world. I really want to be a week. We'll get you a week right now. If you'll commit to it, I think that's a lie. Why don't we do smart-less month? Yeah. Right? Oh, my God.

I would... I just... You just look like you're always having so much fun. Yeah, really? You lie really. I just... Look at this face. Does this look like I'm having fun? What is so comfortable?

Is he not like so comfortable up there and it's so nice to like sit there in bed late at night, you just kind of rock us to sleep and we're out. And it... It's a. And it's a compliment. It's a compliment. I know it's a compliment. Yeah. And I would take it as a, I would feel very touched if I didn't know for a fact that you are sound asleep at 9.45 and we're out of 9.

I got one of those TV's. You're right, he is a liar. Yeah, he's a liar. And yeah, we shouldn't know this from when you were a child actor. We really should have known it. Now, you've been doing your show for so long, and obviously- He told him about Bateman or me.

No, you. And I've heard rumors that you're going to be done in a year. I've heard other rumors that you're going to do for seven more years. Like, what are you feeling? It looks so interesting to me right here, right now. You know, it is funny how interested people in, and on, like, when I'm gonna leave already. It's a three of us, or a three of us.

No, because we hope you never leave. Yeah, that's what people say, but I think it's like, like, if we were out just a party right now, you guys kept asking me when I was gonna leave. Right, yeah. Yeah. It would be weird.

Yeah. And I feel like that all the time. No, no, no. Is this something you want to do forever? What forever? Your show, would you do it for another, for the same amount of time you've been doing it? I want to die on stage. On stage. You want to die on stage.

On stage. You want to die on life, too? We're not happy to best. I mean, the ratings would be tremendous. The show itself is pre-taped, right? So what does ABC do if I die during the show? Do they err? Do they run that night show?

Of course. Sure. And I see when they're going to fall. We run that night show? Of course. Sure. And I see one there. We want to see that. Yeah, they, he's the hell out of it. Wait, wait, how are you dying? Um, massive heart attack. Sure.

Yeah. This is just just explodes at the desk. Yeah. Right, yeah. I think that, if you can do it during sweeps, it'd be fantastic. Oh, that would be great. Yeah, at the end of sweeps, yeah, for sure. Yeah. What do they do? I mean, I probably, like, said this be great. Yeah, at the end of sweeps, yeah, for sure. Yeah. What do they do?

I mean, I probably like said this up like a will, where I tell them what my wishes are. Right. As if I were to die on the show. I once had an overdose of Advil on the show, where my head, I know it sounds ridiculous, but it's possible. What does that look like?

It looks like a pumpkin head. It looks like your head expands. Why are you taking it? Because it's delicious. If you have an handle, you're like a M&M. They are. There's a sweetness to them. Yes.

And they have a magic power that makes you forget how many you've already taken. Yes. Did you really have a bad reaction to it? I had a very bad reaction, and the show was live at the time, and so I started losing my voice. I might be having it now. I started losing my voice. And then my head started to swell up.

And by the end of the show, my head was really big. Come on. And I was introducing Rick Springfield. This was some time ago. And I've been on a long time now that I think of it. Tracey doesn't even need to fill in on that, right? Yeah, she's got it. Exactly.

I did it, and then I went directly to Cinder's sign, I took the hospital to the ER. Yeah. And they were like, what did you do on us? Yeah. You started showing there. By the way, I have seen Sean at the ER. Have you really?

Yes! Yes, this is... No, you didn't know that. No! Yeah. I took a friend of mine... I took a friend of mine too. Exactly.

Sometimes we get... We have a little double day, we go to the other friends. The cafeteria is delicious. But yeah, I was like sitting in a corner with my friend who was sick and you were standing up there and I was like, Jimmy, and you're like, Sean, or like, what's going on? And you're like, oh, I gotta go. I'm getting called in for your warm-up guy.

Yeah, my warm-up guy was having a panic attack and thought he was having a heart attack. So I had to take him in the bathroom. So you took Advil. And you had a friend there who was a famous person we shouldn't mention who it was. And they were like, you will anyway. Yeah.

No, that's not true. They paid a lot of good money, Sean. Yeah. And they were like, you will anyway. Yeah. They paid a lot of good money, Sean. They still had this person was staying with me. And I took her to the ER because she was having a diverticulitis. Yeah, right. Right. I had a chat with the nurse, and I got you guys in.

Yes, you did. You know the thing, great thing is, the nurse cut, let you cut ahead of some people who were very, we're bleeding. And I just, you know what I mean? You know what I mean, a big fan. I looked at the room, I sized it up, I saw these bleeding guys, I was like, what are they gonna really contribute to society?

It's Thursday night at one o'clock in the morning. I mean, they're bleeding. They were probably up to no good. Let's get this one-of-a-way. Yeah, yeah. Sean, how well do you know your way around? Oh, like the back of my hand. You do. Absolutely.

Yeah, because I get, here we go. I get a fib, right? So, you know what an atrial fibrillation is, right? Where your heart goes like this. Puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh-puh- your heart goes like this. Puh, puh, puh, puh. Yeah, it's actually. I don't know where we're going. It goes like this. And so I'm like normed from cheers. I just go in there like, hey, Sean, come on right in.

And they put propa fall in, which is fantastic. And then they, Chacong, they knock my hearted back. And I go home. And it happens all the time. They do that. They do that. Yeah, one time it happened in New York. And they put me out. And I don't think they gave me enough.

And I'm not kidding. They went to Cacó and I woke up and I go, this is amazing. Yeah, I thought it was the most incredible feeling in that moment. Sean, do you have a nickname? No, what would my nickname be? Well, because I feel like I just came up

with a great nickname for Sean. Is it paddles? It's paddles. Yeah. It's paddles. It's paddles. Come on. Do they say clear?

Like, did you get it? I don't know. I'm out. But I do have a set of paddles at home. No, no. But I did say, I maybe said this on the package. I don't know, but I, you know. So I, yeah, so I, but the last time I went,

this is fascinating. Forgive me if I already told you this. I went in there and this is unbelievable. Never happened to me before. I'm there and my heart is pounding. And I go, I'm getting ready to go under. And the doctor says, okay, it's going into your veins. And I was like, oh my God, and I start shaking, which is a whole

this story because I have a side effect. So I'm going like this. Like a beef paddles shakes or something. And so he's like, just try to relax. I was like, okay, and then the nurse goes, did you feel it? And I go, what? She goes, the procedure. I'm like, what?

She goes, yeah, we already did it. I'm like, what? She goes, yeah, we already did it. I'm like, what are you talking about? I like, I time traveled. It was like 20 minutes. It was, I've never experienced that. That sounds fantastic. That's battles for you. Wow.

That's fantastic. Oh, again, battles. That's classic battles. Yeah. I was trying to work on a joke like the first time baby got laid that she was, you know, like, paddles. That's classic paddles. Yeah. I was trying to work on a joke, like, the first time Baman got laid that she was either like, what had already happened?

You know what I mean? But I'm not doing that. Spending it right was not the venue tonight. Baman getting laid. I just want to say this. Jason Bateman might be the most interesting person I know. Yeah. I'm not sure.

No. It's first of all, I agree. Yeah. I'm not sure. No. It's first of all, I think my wife would disagree with that. You hear little bits and pieces of the tales of the old days, which I was not around to witness, but it's like, you know, it's like you did play Teen Wolf, and it's like there was a... Two. Two.

Also, also. Also. It's a big wolf. Yeah, it was T-Double-O. It wasn't T-W-O. Also, also. Also. It's a big wolf, I'm like, yeah, it's T-double-o. Wasn't T-W-O. It was also. In a way, you are team wolf because on, you know, you appear to be normal, and then there's this other guy who's this raging maniac, right?

Right? Right? Yes, right. You never met the maniac. I didn't meet the maniac, but I didn't know the maniac. The maniac may have been doing something illegal backstage on... Well, you did meet the maniac. Yeah, I met the maniac. Yeah.

I just didn't know why the maniac was the maniac. You understand what I'm saying? I think so. We got paddles, and maybe Coke Wolf will be the character. We'll be the character from now on. But that aside, I mean, that's a whole thing just right there. But, oh, I remember that. I was there that night too. Andy Dick. Were you there that night?

Yeah. Wait a second. Yeah, Coke. With you, dude. Wait, are you being serious? On my kids' line, yeah. We went there together. Sure we did. We must...

We must dig up that clip. I know. Of your interview on the show that night and watch it together. Yeah. And perhaps do it on the podcast, so others can enjoy as well. It certifies we have the other time.

I think we've already told this to all the podcasts. So, did we talk about the first time that I met Jason? And he said, oh, no, second, we were doing a rest of the other time I think we've already told this to other podcasts. Yeah, so, do we talk about the first time that I met Jason? And he said, oh, no, second, we were doing the rest of the development. He's like, man, I wish we just, this is when he was still part of, he was like, I wish we had just partied together once now, because you don't partied. I wish we just partied together.

Because we'll have shut it down. I was still a year or two. I would have been awesome. We partied and I go, we did. And he's like, what are you talking about? Like, like five years ago, we went out, we had a big night, and you were with a friend of a friend, and he had done this show. We went a big night, and I remember he was so cool,

because we went to this bar, we got all hammered, and then he like, not cool, but he got into his car, and he sped away, and I was like, this guy's a badass. You know what? You know, give a shit, he had a candle on his dashboard. Oh. So, I was like, this guy's a badass. You know what? You know, give a shit he had a candle on his dashboard. Oh. He had a lit candle on his fucking dash. Yeah, wait a minute.

What? Wait. I know. Why? Ask any questions. You want to go ahead and why? Yeah, why? Why did you light a candle on your dashboard?

Oh. Where your headlights out? Oh. I don't know. I don't know. There was, I was driving a vehicle that had a dashboard that had a little cutout on top of it that just screened for a rego candle on me. I was just incredible.

That was just my rowdy candle, a fucking idiot. And I would light that thing and it would be blazing on my dashboard while I'm driving when I shouldn't so that the cops can see this dick's got a candle. I got a pole, it so steep it. Every night. By the way, instead of mugs, instead of keychains,

maybe dashboard candles. That's the smartness. There you go. That's great. So a lot of those. You're right. That's a great idea. So even the drugs aside, whenever I mention some weird random celebrity to Jason,

it's become like a game that I don't know that he knows I'm playing, it's like a Bateman roulette. He has a great story about everything. All the time and actually right before the show, we were upstairs and somebody mentioned that Jason right now, just because he's, look, he's so handsome, we love him. And with his haircut right now, he's about to get a cut that he looks like

Christie McNichol, so, right? We said, and so of course, the obvious question is, as we're all laughing is, oh, by the way, hey, Bayman, do you know Chrissy McNichol? That's a legitimate question. He did it, but he admitted that he had a huge crush on her. Yeah. And then he had a dream about it to get this.

He had a dream about her. And then he went jogging with his dad that morning after his dream, and he let his dad go ahead because as he was jogging, he was weeping. He was like, six great. Yeah, because I had it bad. Cracked. Anyway, I don't know, man.

So now I grill my hair out like her. So... You went jogging with your dad? Yeah. I was... Right, Sean. I love that you're takeaway instead of the crime. Yeah, I know.

I don't know. I'm trying to imagine myself jogging with my dad and I'm not seeing anything. By the way, me too. Yeah. Yeah. Wait, you're dead. Yeah. You're dead, big goat jogging.

You just went in a straight line. Still jogging. Still running. Still running away. And I can't catch up to him. So anyway, so we got all these random people. So I wrote down some names, and I just figured I'd throw some by you. Oh, my God, he was great.

You did. No one else. Mr. T. I knew him pretty good. Wait a minute. Lay it down. I don't know good. Wait a minute. I don't know. I don't know that. You did?

He knew him pretty good. No one knows him pretty good. I mean, what's not great? Not great. Well, my first place, my head goes to child adult. Why hanging out? Ha ha ha. My, uh, my mom became friends with... Ha ha ha. Mrs. T.

She knew she was really good at... She was tight with Mrs. T. Sure, go ahead. My, uh, my mother became friends with some personal trainer she met on a plane. She was a flight attendant, and he was Mr. T's trainer, and then Mr. T and I met, and then we rekindled when he was guesting on different strokes,

which I was filming next door to. And that was sort of fantastic. So that qualifies. You know, I once, I won some Mr. T, I was getting on a plane in New York to come here years ago. And there was like a jam up at the front door. And it was because Mr. T and flavor flavor were talking in the aisle.

Really loudly. It was an incredible. That's true? Yeah. It was an incredible moment. He probably wanted to know what time it was. Yeah. LAUGHTER

Well, he pitted, yeah, he pitted the fool. Yeah, it was time to let's go ahead. All right, Bill Cosby. Oh. Be careful. Pass. No. I knew him only from when he was starting the Cosby show.

We were in New York doing all the upfront sales for stuff. I was on a show, it was on NBC, Cosby show is NBC. We were at the same table together and we talked, and we had a good time. Well, these are boring stories. Yeah, I don't have any dirty stuff. I didn't see their good stories. I said, he knows these people.

Right, okay. Wait, so did you know them for a long time or? No, no. No, no. Okay. LAUGHTER One conversation, one table, a professional event. Okay.

Next question. What about OJ? LAUGHTER Simpson, specifically. No, but we were at, I was at that Buffalo Bill's game that where he was on the sideline doing the reporting with the wooders wearing the shoes that they zoomed in on. And I was there because I was buddies with Jim Kelly at the time, and he was playing quarterback for the-

You were buddies with Jim Kelly? This is better, Buffalo Bill. Yeah, that- there's a good story there, but we don't have time. Ronald Reagan, you ever meet Ronald Reagan? I did not. Oh, okay, I was gonna make a while. I know. All right, Janet Jackson.

Oh, yeah. I went to school with Janet Jackson. I used to- I used to. I went to school with Janet Jackson. I see. I see. We went to, we went to, we went to, where on the universe a lot. Close. I went to this, this, this poor excuse for a school called Valley Professional School, where, where kids who are trying to make it in business and show business go because it's only from 8 to 12, so you can go do auditions after 12. And it was like in a mini mall, deep in the North Valley, and she went to school there.

I was some ice skaters went there. And that was just before the following year I went to a school called Heartlight, where... The old diamond school. Turn on your heartlight. Yeah. And this school, this had another new channel,

it's Jackson, but it's a good story. This school was very progressive, such that there were city days and country days. In the country days, you went to this dude's house in Calabasis. LAUGHTER I had the greatest parents in country days, you went to this dude's house in Calabasis. I had the greatest parents in the world, you guys. So you go to this dude's house, Monday Wednesday, Friday out in Calabasis and you do some scores.

You're like six kids in the whole school. And on city days, you get onto this bus, a full school bus, that the back half was converted into school desks. And the front half are regular seats, because you would go and you'd visit all the cultural sites in Los Angeles. But because we're in Calabas and the traffic is so bad, you can do schoolwork in the back of the bus on the way to these fucking things.

And I think we paid, my parents paid, they didn't I'd pay for this shitty experimental school that wasn't accredited. So I let this one, so stupid. Listen to the schools I go to. So did you and Janet hang out like were your friends or were pretty friendly? That's nice. She's great. Like if you were to call her now, she would answer. We had our funny stories about Valley professional.

Wow. When was the last time you spoke to Janet Jackson? It was sixth grade Sean and I did a I did an episode of Will and Grace was Sean and I played one of her back her background dancers No, but Sean and I Sean and I had a dance off. Yeah, High that go. Let's go. No, god, no. All right. All right. Let's go. I don't remember what Sean had.

I just don't have some money. 5, 6, 7, 8. Boom. Boom. Go. There you go. There you go. But you know what?

That was right after Nipplegate, right? And so that was nice of her to come on because she was, you know, it wasn't the best time for her. We'll be right back. SmartLess is supported by Audible. Audible lets you enjoy all your audio entertainment in one app. You'll always find the best of what you love or something new to discover.

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Follow the vanished wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on Amazon Music or the Wondery app. And now back to the show. Lucille Ball. Oh. Did you meet Lucie? I did not. Oh. I did.

How old do you think I am? And then you read. I'm suggesting you were in school bus school together. Yeah. School bus school. Never met Lucy. Never met Lucy. All right, one more.

Yeah. Hulk Hogan. Never. Never. Wow. Well, you've disappointed everyone. Sorry. Let me just toss in the same area, Lou Ferigno. Yes.

I have a story about Lou Ferigno and you're done, too. I played the Dodgers, the greatest baseball team in the history of sports. Wait a minute. Why would they be the greatest baseball team in the history of sports? Wouldn't they just be the greatest team in the history of the... I love how be, they'd just be the greatest team in the history of the... I've never had a great education gym. Oh, all right.

So, the Dodgers have this great celebrity baseball game every year, and I was lucky enough to play it at one year, and I somehow closed my eyes and put the bat on the ball and hit a gapper into the right center field. Lou Ferigno was playing right field, and I hit it right past the sprinting Lou Ferigno. It hit the wall, I hit it off Tony Dancer, by the way. Who's Tony?

And Lou threw a seed back into the infield. There was a play at the plate. I got an inside the park home run. It's Dr. Stegon, let's get it going. Wow. Wow, but that's a legit Lou Ferigno story. Yeah. You're telling me you hit a line drive into right field

and managed to get all the way home and there were no errors committed? No, Lou had real skills. Now, Jonathan Silverman may have overthrown the home plate, but did we give you that hat and that motel key chain? I don't know if he gave it to me. It was sitting in a pile in the room in the prison cell you had me in.

Before I came out here, all everyone's so like, they can't see you. If they see you, they cannot see you. But meanwhile, back to the critiquing of the podcast. Okay, yeah. There's this big mystery of who the guest is gonna be in. You know, it's like, oh, there's so much mystery.

Meanwhile, when we're listening, the name's right there on the be. And you know, it's like, oh, there's so much mystery. Meanwhile, we're listening, the names right there on the phone. I know, but it's only a mystery to you guys. Yeah, but that's not a mystery to us. That's kind of the fun. There's no mystery for us. Okay, oh, there's no mystery for them. For us, they're right, right, for the listener, right, right.

Oh, yeah. For the people listening, there's nothing, but for you guys. Yeah. All right. There's a real rush. It's a really good point. OK, OK.

Except I'm torn. It's something that we, I've thought about that, but what do you want us to, we can just take the name off? Do you guys want us to take the name off? So you don't know? No, no, no, no. Fight it out. Fight it, guys.

No way. But it was, it was, it was an idea born of laziness. And Will and I were trying to remember whose idea it was. And you're saying it's yours. I can't remember who it was, but it was basically like, it was yours. Because we didn't want to do any prep. We're just like, just like, if I don't know who it is,

then I'm going to ask really organic questions and post them thinking them through. Organic is a great word for it. What does it mean? I hear it all the time. No way, man. You didn't learn that at a snuff like that. You guys, you guys, we guys, this is a long light.

So. In World War II, you guys vacation a lot together. Or not a lot, but sometimes you guys vacation. We do. Do you have any kind of crazy Jason Bayman stories from vacation? Crazy, I mean, he only does... I'm gonna take a lot of fire. What about some funny stories about this guy?

You're a normal. I'm normal. He's pretty normal. Well, I mean, yeah, I mean, there are certain things that, I mean, it's interesting that you can be so tan in December. It's February. In England.

In England under an umbrella. And then you say you're not using any kind of a tanning frame and to prove it, and this is the best thing, he makes us look at his feet. You know what I feel like right now? We're gonna find some weird sex thing up about you that you're really into, like, showing women your feet or something, like, and, like, we'll go, oh, yeah, you used to do that with the tanning thing,

and then even when we did the smartless podcast with the Orpheum, he took off his shoe and he quickly showed his foot to everyone. He can't stop. I legitimately don't do anything weird. And I'm probably very sort of boringing that way. And yes, you show the feet because people who get spray tan, and I know some people who've had it done.

Oh. I'm not going to say Justin Thoreau on the stage. Why would I...? Why would I say Justin Thoreau? That's wrong with me. Why would I say say a good thing? And then he's gonna get a hear about it and he's gonna be mad.

So I'm just like, nah, I'm gonna say it, nah, another show. And you can see streaks on the stage. Yeah, like like, fall Giuliani. I'm gonna say, you'll never catch Justin throw on the rain. You'll never see a photo of him in the rain.

So, can't do it. But I've gotten to the point now where people say you're tan and I just say thank you. But I have like a real farmer's tan now. It's like a go. Oh yeah, you're a real farmer. I know. Like a gentleman farmer.

I was thinking, what was I thinking about? You said one of your stories. That's what the Rick Springfield. Yeah. Did I tell you guys, did I tell the story on the show about, maybe think of Bruce Springsteen? Did I tell you about meeting Bruce Springsteen? No, everybody confused.

Yeah, he even made a song about it. Think so, so one, this is years ago, I was in New York at Barney's on like a Wednesday, this whole clothing store on the Upper East Side of New York, at like 11 o'clock on a Wednesday, there was nobody up there. And I see Bruce Springseeing in there. Oh yeah.

Close shopping. And he's not obviously gonna try stuff on in the change room. He's just got like a pile on the counter. But he's just gonna take it all home with him. And then I guess send back whatever he does it like or it doesn't fit or whatever, right? So, legitimately, just the two of us.

So he puts it on there, and then there's a guy working at the counter and sees and Bruce Springstein says, hey, can I just, I just want to put this on my account. That's a great Bruce Springstein. Thanks, man. Thank you. If I close my eyes, it's like I'm at the store with you. He says, and the guy goes, and the guy goes, no problem,

and he grabs the phone, and he goes, Oh, no. And he goes, I've got Rick Springfield here. No. True story. And I was just behind Springsteen as this happens, and he goes, we're just really feeling one of it. And to this credit, Springste brews brews brews steam.

And the guy's like, I mean brews brews steam and then hangs up. And then he was any kind of laughter. He turned to me and he just said, my kids would love it, it's fine. I was so fucking mortified, but yeah. Got all the clothes for free. It was a great moment.

A great moment. That's pretty good. Yeah. And that's what clothes Barney's. Yeah. That's how to do it. That story, clothes pretty good. Yeah, and that's what close Barney's That story Close Barney. Yeah Now you're having us over tomorrow for Super Bowl. Very nice. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah You used to have a lot of super or football gatherings every weekend. Why did that stop did Molly get pissed off?

No, no, no. Actually, my cousin, Sal, who is, who kind of organized the whole thing, took mercy on me because I was spending a whole day, Saturday, preparing for the Sunday. Me and you cook, because you cook. Yeah, because I cook everything. Everything.

Every single thing. It's incredible, folks. And then Sunday would be me feeding those animals. Right. And this went on for like 11 years, and finally he's like, this is enough. This is too much for you. So you like cooking for that many people,

don't you like maybe taking a break and having somebody cook for you? Like do you always do that? Oh yes, sometimes I go to restaurants even. Ha ha ha. What do we, what do we got tomorrow? What are you cooking up tomorrow? Tomorrow smoked pastrami, smoked chicken wings,

my mother's making a vegan chili, the greatest mother. I'm making a big sandwich that has grilled zucchini and melted cheese and arugula on it, ribs. Can we do a part of that with those zucchini? Yeah, can you take the zucchini off? Just if I can make a request. Yeah.

No problem. Just on a quarter of it? Yeah. Now, is half of that marinating right now? Like, did you prep today? I grilled the zucchini today, yeah. OK. We can toss it out.

I learned. Wait, but what? What makes it? I'd have never even heard of it. Look at the mat you are. Why are you so mad? Because I'm the loser of a zucchini. what, I'd have never even heard of him. Look at the mad you are. Why are you so mad? Because I'm the host of a zucchini sandwich. You know what, because he needs popcorn.

He needs popcorn. What? He's hungry. Why, who's ever heard of a zucchini sandwich? That's terrible. But you know what, look, he gets, so he hasn't had anything to eat for like 45 minutes. Yeah.

You know what I mean? You know what I mean? First of all, I want to get him some food. Great, because I made it for you, number one, because you eat like a princess. Yeah. And I'm gonna have, I'm gonna go outside my comfort shop. So I'm gonna get you some popcorn? No, I had a bunch of, I'm not gonna crap for a week, guys.

We get some popcorn. We get some popcorn. We get some popcorn. Maybe some popcorn. Maybe some popcorn. Thanks, man. Oh, that some popcorn. Maybe some popcorn. Maybe some popcorn. Thanks, man. Oh, that's great. Thanks so much.

It was bringing it right over here. Thank you. This is a good sign of ours. Oh, that's great. Who's that? Wait, wait, wait, wait. Jennifer Aniston. What?

What? What? What? What? What? What? What? What?

What? What? What? What? What? I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way.

I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way. I'm going to go this way. I'm him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him.

Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him.

Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at him. Look at Okay, yeah, I don't need it. Jennifer Anderson!

Jennifer, I got to you! Oh my God! I thought I heard that laugh backstage. Jennifer, would you grab me a sparkling water please? Haha! By the way, it's so funny because it was very nice for you guys plotted when I came out, when these guys came out, it felt like real enthusiasm, it definitely made me feel good.

And then Jennifer Aniston comes out and you're like, oh, we're a bunch of fucking slugs. Oh, man. Oh, man. That's like, ah! That's the best. The best. There you go, buddy. All right, so I'm gonna go outside my comfort zone tomorrow.

I'm gonna have ribs. Yeah? I'm gonna have what else is... You don't have any of these things. You're gonna sit there and pretend to be eating. No, no. So you can imagine. To be fair, what about last night?

I mean, I was just a shit pig last night. I put everything in me last night. Yeah. I... Hi. If you're... If you're... There's almost always a video in this illegally,

please put that... Just that clip on the internet. I put everything in me last night. Thank you. And then... And I get it back. And then follow it with, do I have 2B? Yeah. Hey, you want to know what?

Yeah. This is true. We told some other people before. 2B, since December, this has gone up 40%. Yeah. It's true. It's true. But what's 40% on 2B?

It's like eight people. Who's But what's 40% on 2B? It's like 8 people. Who's going to win the game tomorrow, Jimmy? Well, I don't know. Wait, wait. Do you know who's playing them all? Of course, I know who's playing. Who? Well, the bangles and the ramps.

All right, good. Or, as everyone says, all the time, the bangles and the ramps, as if Susanna Hoffs and the gang. Yeah, yeah, I'm gonna say. Are taking on Matt Stafford. I mean, it's ridiculous. Bangles and jaguires, those are the two things. I'm just make every hair on my body stand up

when I'm watching football. I wanna get back to Bateman's eating for one second. Yeah. Because we were on the ball. And that is the title of his new book, Jason Bateman eating for one second. Yeah. And that is the title of his new book, Jason Bateman, Eating for one second. We're on the road. The food shame was off the chart.

Oh, yeah. Consulate gauging, what are you having? What are you eating? I'm not going to have that now. It's waiting too late with the, it's waiting. Yeah. Right, John? Yeah, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then. Well, I get nightmares if I have it too late. And then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, Well, I get nightmares if I have it too late.

You need too late, you need too late, you need the demons come. He was like, he's the king of like, Hey, I'm going to order some dessert. I'm not eating that dessert. Three, two, one. What do you got there? Yeah.

You started, I finished. I just used that term. He said, he was doing the ordering for the room service. We all started to see him room on tour every city. It was such a mistake. And every night, and so Jason's ordering dinner one night, and he's taking the order from all of us, and then he goes, he's got the person on the line.

And then he goes, and turns to shot and goes, what do you want, shit pig? The person, like, imagine is like, what the fuck is going on? So you're gonna be the woman. Good, and I'm like, I said, I have the spare ribs and he goes, yeah, the pig will have some spare ribs. It's all good fun.

It is all good fun. See you can resist the popcorn. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, it's so much. Skinny Pop, the best popcorn in the world. No, it's a camera. Where's the camera? Not a sponsor. Speaking of fun, Jimmy, it's been so fun having you.

Thank you for coming. Jimmy, that's it. It's over. It's over. No, no, I'm fine. I like to watch the rest. I know. We love you. We thank you. You're the best. Wow. rest. I know. I know. We love you.

We thank you. You're the best. Wow. Thanks. I know. You know what? I appreciate it. I appreciate all of you for coming here tonight.

And I also want to make one more comment about the show. Yeah, go ahead. Go ahead. Thank you, Jen. You guys do the real lives. You can't do the rest without shoes? Go ahead, Jimmy. Yeah. No, I love the show.

I'm glad that I feel like it's so exciting to see all these people come to see you guys do this, which really came out of just the very private conversation between the three of you and then sometimes really good and sometimes not so good guests. And I'm so happy for you. And I hope you guys are appreciative of the magic that this is because it is a wonderful thing. These people are here.

And to hear the dismissive way you talk about them off the air is just... I just find it offensive. I know me too, and I tell them all the time. I find it very offensive. I'm with you. But these are the best. Yeah, these are the best. They're the best, yeah. Thank you, buddy. Thanks, guys.

Thank you, Ravi. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, Ravi. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, everybody.

Thank you, everybody. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, everybody. You did good. Thank you, everybody. You did good. Thank you, everybody. You did good.

Thank you, everybody. You did good. Thank you, everybody. You did good. Thank you, everybody. You did good. Thank you, everybody. You did good.

Thank you, everybody. You did good. Thank you, everybody. You did good. Thank you, everybody. You did good. Thank you, everybody. It was so fun having somebody who's important to us out here up for the last night. You guys are here at the last show of the tour. Yes, thank you. Thank you for being here. I've said it to Jimmy's face on his show. I said all the time that he's one of the kindest. He really is everything you think he is.

He's one of the kindest, most generous people in the business. We all love him. It's something, you should know. He said, if any of our guests dropped out on this tour all over the country over this last week, week and half, he says, I will get on a plane and I will fly there and I will sit there.

It's where they got true story. And yeah, he jokes around a lot, but he does really have these, he's just got such a squishy sort of center. And he's always the first, you know, he really does. He's like the guy who will just always offer to help or do what he's, it's amazing on top of being incredibly hilarious and just, and a gorgeous hard candy shell on the outside.

Yeah, yeah. Back to food. So, yeah. You got to get that looked at. Um, um, but anyway, so thank you guys so much. I mean, it's just been incredible. I'm not know. I feel shocked Thinking right is it fucking smoke coming out of his ears try to work on you know what he's trying to do I just wish you know, I just wish we could have spent more time with Jen. You know, but it feels so nice to be here. Get out of here!

Come on! Come on, yeah! I wanna do this. Just say hi. Hi. Thank you for coming. Hi, everybody. Thank you for coming. And if you were here.

OK, I think this has been really a lovely, lovely evening. And I wish I could just come up with something, something sort of something to say something like like something. Something. Oh, we like like goodbye. Bye. Bye. Thank you so much.

Thank you, my lady. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, thank you. Thank you. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers.

Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Smartless is 100% organic and artisanally handcrafted by Rob Armjurff, Bennett Barbaco, and Michael Grandterry. Smart loss.

In the first part of the 20th century, the Hilton family had a luck on the hotel industry by offering upscaled service at a modest price. The company was expanding fast and buying up iconic properties across the country, like the Plaza and the Waldorf Astoria, but their unchallenged rise wouldn't last. An ambitious Mormon named J.W. Marriott decides to pivot from restaurants to hospitality, and he's after Hilton's business, developing modern hotels across the world, but both the Hilton and Marriott families will have to contend with their share of drama in finding a successor, while also fighting to stay solvent in a high stakes business.

Hi, I'm David Brown, the host of Wondery Show Business Wars. We go deep into some of the biggest corporate rivalries of all time. In our latest season, Hilton and Merriott are in a race to expand globally and secure the loyalty of fickle customers. Make sure to follow business wars wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. of thick old customers. Make sure to follow business wars wherever you get your podcasts.

You can listen ad free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app.