Smosh Reads Reddit Stories - Feel Good Stories For Once | Reading Reddit Stories

Episode Date: January 13, 2024

Reddit making us have faith in humanity again, can you believe? 0:00-0:53 Intro 0:54-11:38 I peed my pants in front of my date 11:39-22:44 My daughter was too funny to be mad at 22:45-31:50 I didn't ...react to my daughter coming out 31:51-35:36 New manager breaks a cycle 35:37-42:52 I threw my steak out a window 42:53-54:26 Is my fiancee hung up on her ex who passed away SUBSCRIBE: https://smo.sh/Sub2SmoshPit WEAR OUR JOKES: https://smosh.com WHO YOU HEAR Shayne Topp // https://www.instagram.com/shaynetopp/ Tommy Bowe // https://www.instagram.com/tomeybones/ Angela Giarratana // https://www.instagram.com/angelagiovanagiarratana/ WHO YOU DON’T SEE (usually) Director: Kimmy Jimenez Editor: Rock Coleman Director of Programming, Smosh Pit: Emily Rose Jacobson Associate Producer, Smosh Pit: Kimmy Jimenez EVP, Programming & Content: Kiana Parker Assistant Director: Amanda Barnes Art Director: Cassie Vance Assistant Art Director: Erin Kuschner Art Coordinator: Alex Aguilar Audio Mixer: Greg Jones Dir Of Photography: Brennan Iketani Dir, Design: Brittany Hobbs Designer: Ness Cardano DIT/AE: Matt Duran Post Production Manager: Luke Baker Production, EVP: Zoe Moacanin Production Manager: Amanda Barnes Production Coord: Heidi Ha Production Assistant: Marcus Munguia Senior Manager, Channel & Strategy: Lizzy Jones Talent Coordinator: Selina Garcia OTHER SMOSHES: Smosh: https://smo.sh/Sub2Smosh Smosh Games: https://smo.sh/Sub2SmoshGames El Smosh (Spanish Dub): https://smo.sh/Sub2ElSmosh SmoshCast: https://smo.sh/Sub2SmoshCast FOLLOW US: TikTok: https://smo.sh/TikTok Snapchat: http://smo.sh/OnSnapchat Instagram: https://instagram.com/smosh Facebook: https://facebook.com/smosh Twitter: https://twitter.com/smosh Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 I'm going back to university for zero dollar delivery fee, up to 5% off orders and 5% Uber cash back on rides. Not whatever you think University is for. Get Uber won for students. With deals this good, everyone wants to be a student. Join for just $4.99 a month. Savings may vary eligibility and member terms apply. Welcome back to Reddit stories. silly stories, some amazing ones and some amazing people overall, very wholesome. And with me today are two pretty silly people. Tommy and Angela, what are you
Starting point is 00:00:31 looking at? Hey, wholesome? Hulesome? Us? The secret demons? Cats out of the bag, we're secret. It's gonna be a good episode. How are you guys doing? I'm having the time of my life. Yeah. I'm fine. I'm fine. I'm great. I'm having the time of my life right now.
Starting point is 00:00:55 And Angela? Fine. Fine. Oh. Oh, no. Well, let's hop right into this. Okay. Okay. Today I fucked up by peeing my pants in front of my date.
Starting point is 00:01:11 I love that. Yeah. One of my worst fears. Really? Consistently throughout my life, I'm just always like, what if I peeed your pants? Have you peed your pants? Have you ped your pants? Have you ped your pants? Uh, yeah? Yeah, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tod tod tod tod tod tod today, tod tod tod tod tod tod tod tod. Okay, tod. tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod, tod. tod. tod. tod. tod. today. Today, today. Today, today I today I today's today's today's today's today's today's today's today's today's today's always like, but today's the day. Have you pede your pants? Uh, yeah, a little. Oh, okay. I've done like a little leak. I've peed my pants the full way. Well, start to finish. Full to empty. Full to empty. And I was wearing shorts. Oh, no. to that later. Let's hop into the story. to th. to to th. to th. to th. th. to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to the the to the to the to the to finish. to finish. to finish. Fi. Fe. Fe. Fe. Fe. the the the to finish. Fe. Fe. Fe. Fe. Fe. Fe. Uh, to finish. Uh. Uh, to finish. Uh, uh. Uh, uh. Uh, uh. Uh, uh. Uh, uh. Uh, uh. F. Uh, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Uh. Uh. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. Yeah, the. Yeah, the. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, the. Yeah, th. Yeah, the. Yeah, the. Yeah, the. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah I was wearing shorts. We'll get to that later. Let's hop into the
Starting point is 00:01:48 story. Let's see this and then we'll come back. Embarrassing as heck guys. I feel disgusted. I reel, today I fucked up on all levels. I, a 23 year old man, have liked this girl, who's 23, for around three years now. We are in the same university classes and even during the pandemic when I barely saw her, I was still crushing on her. I asked her out last week and was over the moon when she agreed. Today we met up in a nearby restaurant and that's where this all started. I have this condition called parareasis, shy bladder syndrome, where I just am
Starting point is 00:02:21 not physically able to pee if other people are around in public bathrooms. Even if I really have to go, I just can't. So because of my nerves and because of how hot it is and the amount of water I stupidly drank, I ended up going to the bathroom several times, but of course couldn't pee. Then she told me that if I was not feeling okay, it would be totally fine to go home. I agreed and apologized to her. She ended up paying the bill. It's so sweet, but damn, I really have to pay her back. And we got out. It was somewhere in the parking lot where it happened. I just could not hold it back. I just stood there, traumatized. I did not know this girl well enough, and I should come to her
Starting point is 00:03:07 place which was a two-minute walk where I could shower. I agreed to it because I felt like a disgusting mess. We went to her place, we went to her place and well actually it turned out to be an amazing day. I showered, we watched some cartoons till my clothes were dry, talked about life and deep shit, and she got us ice cream. I know she was trying to make me feel better, and I love her for that, but still I was dying inside. I left just an hour ago because she works in the evening. I was at the door when she hugged me and said it was a good day and repeated again soon. This was embarrassing as heck the te. thi. thii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I was thi. I was thi. I was thi. I was embarrassing. I was embarrassing, thi. I was embarrassing, thr-a. I was th thr-a. I was embarrassing, thr-a. I'm, thin, thin, th. I'm, th. I'm, th. I'm, th. I'm, th. I'm, th. I'm, th. I's, th. I, th. I, th. I. I's, thi. I's thr-a. I's thr-a. I's thr-a. I's thr-a. I's thr-a. I's thr-a. I'm t t thauu. I'm t ttttttttttttttry. I'm ttttttttry. I'm tttry. I'm try. I'm try like I hit the jackpot now and it kind of feels surreal that she was so damn sweet and reacted this way. Like wow how could she be this amazing? How could she like me? I bet she doesn't and just didn't want to make it worse for me today. That's
Starting point is 00:03:56 probably it. Anyhow, that's how today I fucked up. I guess now I really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really really have I really really have I really have I really have I really have I really I really have to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th th thi tho tho th th th th tho th tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho the the the to to to to the to the to the to the the the the thooooooo the tho and to make things right with her. Wow. Pretty sweet. I love how a person was extremely kind and he's like, man, she probably just feels sorry for me. I'm stupid. I'm sorry I pissed my pants. She actually probably hates me. Yeah. It's like, no, she's kind.
Starting point is 00:04:19 Also, you and I gave each other a look and let's talk about it. They watch they they they they they they. They they. they. they. they. they. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. th. th. I th. I that. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I tha. tha. tha. to to to to to tha. to to tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooe. I talk about it. They watched cartoons. They had ice cream. They fucked. They fucked. Cartoons and ice cream. Hot take, I think if I saw my date piss themselves, I'd ignore it. I'd be like, I don't know if you can fully ignore it if it's a full... Well it depends. Is he going like, okay I'm gonna go now, all right, or is he like...
Starting point is 00:04:49 If, if I don't see anything but like a little like, oh, like a little visual, he pissed himself, I'd be like, so good to see you, I'll talk to you later, and I would just get out of there, so he could just deal with it. I'm getting the sense, he probably, he probably, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he's probably, he's probably, he's probably, like, like, he's probably, like, like, he's probably, like, he's probably, he's probably, like, like, he's probably, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm getting the sense he probably like communicated as it was happening. He's probably he's probably like I'm so sorry oh my god I I'm having an accident like I that's what I'm picturing. Yeah anytime someone has an embarrassing moment I'm like it'll be better for them if I don't clock it.
Starting point is 00:05:16 That's I try to do that. It's a weird compassion like fight or flight that comes in for some reason. I try to do it as well as well as well as well as well as well as well as well as well as well as well as well as well as well as well as well as well as as. I as. I th as th as th as th as th as th as th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I to do it as a to do it as I'm to to th. th. I'm to. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. the the the the th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. I'm to. I'm th. th. to. t. try. to. try. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm.. I try to do it as well because I think that's what I would want. Yeah. I think I put myself and I'm like, I would want people to not know. Yeah, but what she did was the best. What about like something in your teeth though? Oh, that's different. See, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:05:35 I feel inherently, I don't know if someone's going through something and I get the sense that I'm like, hey, if if they knew or thought nobody saw it or acknowledged that they would feel better, then I try to just be like, all right, I didn't see th. I th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. I that is that is that is that is that is throwne. thr. thr. throwne. thr. that thr. thr. thr. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. th. th. I'm th. I'm th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeean. I'm a toteeeeeeeean. I'm a big. thean. theeean. the. th. th. I I try to just be like, all right, I didn't see anything. Yeah. But sometimes like this, this is not what you can do. Yeah. Like, they're on a date. But she was so sweet. And I mean, like, I don't know. I also think there's something to be said, whenever something goes wrong on a date of like, it kind of makes it a vulnerable moment. I don't think anyone wants this type of vulnerable moment. theeeeuuuuuuuuuble the. the. the. the. the. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, I thi. thi. thateate ea thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I the. I the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I thee like theeeeeeeeeeean. I theeeanan. I theeeeeeeateeeeeeeeeateeeeee. Yeah, theee. Yeah, the wants this type of vulnerable moment, but when things go wrong on a date, sometimes it's like the best thing. No, for sure, it's like the season of the meat cute, ever since then. What am I saying?
Starting point is 00:06:34 What? What? We have some comments here. Oh. A lot of people vomit on their date, on the first date, pe the bed after a hookup, et cetera, and end, and end, and end, and end, and end, and end, and end, and end, and end, and end, and end, and e., and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, th, th, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the, the the the the th?? And, th. And, the, the, the, the?e?e? the theat, the the the the the the the the the the the the the?e? the the the th, pee the bed after a hook up, etc. and end up marrying that person. It sounds like she was really sweet about it. I don't think you actually fucked up, just something to laugh about later. OP responded, thanks so much, really appreciate this. Yeah, let me, I think so he thanks, heed thanks.
Starting point is 00:06:53 He didn't to fuck up. I gotta start pissing around. I gotta start vomiting on dates. On dates. I gotta start vomiting. Before we get this started, BOO! I find you really attractive. MALL! And they come up, they're like, why did you both throw up? It's like, we're at Red Lobster. That's what we do here.
Starting point is 00:07:20 Someone else said, well now you can stop stop worrying about what happened in the past. The past is gone. Now stop staring. Now stop staring at it. Look forward because you've got a keeper who is happy being around you and understands you. All you've got to do is stop being nervous around her and be yourself. You'll be good, buddy. OP responds. Thanks a lot, dude. I'm still nervous as heck th keep my hopes high. I think that's smart. Someone else said, you don't need to step up your game.
Starting point is 00:07:46 She seems to accept you as you are. Just keep being yourself. That's probably why you got that far in the first place. And I mean, look, like, with any, with anything on a date, that any of our insecurities, I feel like, on first dates, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th and, they, they, th and, they, they, they, th. thi, they, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, the, th. And, the, the, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, I's, and, I's, and, I's, and, and, and, and, and, and, I's, and, and, and, and, and, th th toooo. th th th th th th thinks, and, th the, thinks, th we try to like hide them or pretend or there's a tendency to, but it's like, hey, if you really want to be with this person, they're going to have to know about it eventually. And for your own happiness in that relationship, you want to be with someone who's going to accept it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:16 So this guy knows someone handles their insecurities on a date. Does that make sense? Yeah. Does it make sense? Whoa. It's like not what you're insecure of, it's you pushing past it and like wanting to, but that's hard and that's gross. That's really tough.
Starting point is 00:08:35 That's what that's what you pee your pants? Yeah. What of what can you tell us? I thought we were going to move past? We can. We're allowed to move past it. I had my bladder urethra situation that's like part of the lore now and real. And so I worked at this pizza place that was a hellish nightmare Hellscape. And I had to pee really bad, but I was also like, get me the f- I'm here! I was like, I want to go home! And I lived literally like, ooh, ooh, ooh. So I was like, I can make it, I can do it.
Starting point is 00:09:17 And so I like got in my car and I was like, oh, oh no. And so basically what happened was I got up to my door. It was an outdoor door to my, not a dorm, but like, you know, an apartment that's college adjacent, right? And I couldn't get the key in. And then I started going, I can't get the key in. I'm gonna be my pants. And then I, and then I was like, oh! And I was like, oh! And I was like... I mean the laugh. It was you talking about the key? What's making me laugh is, is that the Halloween theme is playing in my head, as if Michael Myers is walking towards you and you're like,
Starting point is 00:09:55 like, ah! I can't get the key! And you're like, oh! And then Michael Myers is like, oh! like oh no he's like you want to come home I live to I live two I live two blocks away you want to shower yeah ice cream of movies I fucked Michael Myers hell yeah update are they together are they married he never pissed again guys a few minutes ago she texted me that she is at work and asked me how I am doing then she says for the next, let's go somewhere in nature or to a quiet place or whatever
Starting point is 00:10:26 place is comfortable to me. She asked when I was free and I was seriously shaking. This is absolutely the best thing ever. Is this even really happening? There is some chance out there for her to be my girlfriend and it. There is so the thaui. Our second date is set now and I know for sure I won't ruin it. This girl is more than amazing, but so are you guys. Thanks a lot for all your kind, positive and heartwarming comments.
Starting point is 00:10:51 I'll make sure to show it to her. I can't believe this is happening and we are going out again. Thanks to all of you and have a very, very great day. Totally forgot to say, but some people ask so I'll mention it here, too. She knows about the parareasis. I told her when I was at her place. She proceeded to look up more info about it and how it can be treated and was super supportive. She's totally the best, never give up, someone will accept and love you for who you are. You're gonna make me piss out of my eyes.
Starting point is 00:11:18 Aw. Our director Emily was on the fetal position on the floor. That's really sweet. What a sweet thing. I know. That's presch. It's a great one to start with. Also, wait a little bit longer for an update. I know. I know.
Starting point is 00:11:35 Secret demons! I'm like, I want some. I'm like, have the eighth date go. Yeah. Stop pissing all the information away. Hey. . eighth date go. Yeah. Yeah. Stop pissing all the information away. You know. Hey! Hold on to it. Yeah. Will you hold it? Can you hold it? Okay, next story. Am I the asshole for not being mad at my daughter and thinking she's actually pretty funny?
Starting point is 00:11:56 Ha ha ha! Let's go. Here we go. This is such a ridiculous situation that I feel like an asshole just for posting, but my wife is legitimately peeved. So Reddit, tell me if I'm too blinded by amusement to see clearly or if this is objectively funny and not worth punishing our kid about. It's a 43-year-old man. My dad, who's 64, used to love taking us on adventures as kids, but he slowed down recently. He still loves spending time with my daughter, who's 12. Okay, so dad decided to introduce daughter to his favorite childhood shows, and for whatever reason, she loves them. Star Trek, Bonanza, the Andy Griffith's show, all of it. She's hooked. She thinks it's all fantastic. Okay, fun fact about my daughter.
Starting point is 00:12:40 She loves Googling fun facts. Her favorite phrase is, Did you know? Like, we'll drive past a sign saying we're X miles from some location and she whips out that phone and is like, Did you know, X location is the salamander capital of the world? It's really cute and annoying at the same time. So last week, she comes downstairs and says, Did you know ABC made Burt Ward take pills to shrink his penis?
Starting point is 00:13:05 Totally deadpan. Didn't even crack. When I tell you I weased. She showed me the article and yep, they did. The 60s, what a time. Wife was mad. She told daughter to never use that word or we were going to wash her mouth out with soap. Whoa. An empty threat. Da daughter pouted and went about her day. Next day, she told my dad, who didn't believe her at first, and then absolutely lost it when he read the article she pulled up.
Starting point is 00:13:33 I can't remember the last time I saw him laugh that hard. Wife came out, heard what the wife's friends called while the girls were having a play date, and you'll never guess what my daughter did. You'll never guess in a million years. Go on, guess. Yeah, she told the story to her little friend, who also thought it was hilarious. Her friend's mother did not.
Starting point is 00:13:58 Wife is furious now and says we need to come up with a punishment. I don't want to punish her. I think if we stop making a big deal about it, she'll get bored of it eventually. Wife's argument is that she's doing it for attention. Duh, she's 12. But she's going to learn about this stuff in health class soon anyway. Might as well get the giggles out of her system now. So am I the asshole for not supporting my wife, and dragging my heels on punishing our daughter? Wife. W. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. the, thu. thu, th. th. th. to, to, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. to, to, the. to, to, to to to to to to to to to to to toeeeeeeeeee toeeee. thu. ying us. I say the harder we come down the more she will push back. That is pretty funny. Also, wow did you guys know that they made Burt Ward take pills to shrink his penis? Why did it? I have to look up this article now pulling up this info just because we knew. Yeah. Bert Ward is an actor who played Robin, the sidekick of Adam West's Batman in the television series Batman. No. And it's theoretical feature film. According to Ward, his bulge was considered so big that ABC, the network that aired the show, considered taking action in an
Starting point is 00:14:58 attempt to change that. The studio sent him to see a doctor who prescribed a medication that Bird said would shrink me up. Ward also th. th. th. th. th. the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to, to, th. th. We, th. th. to, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. I, th. We, th. We, th. We, th. I, th. We, th. I, thi, thi, thi. We, the, theeeeeeeeateeat, theeeat, theeoret, the, the, theeeeorete, the, would shrink me up. Ward also added that his co-star, the late Adam West, had a different problem with his bulge. He needed to go the other direction. No! With Adam they put Turkish towels in his undershorts. Can I Google something really quick? What do you want to do thigh? to the image? Guys, we got to see the bulges. that's that's. that's. that's. that's. that's that's that's that's that's that's. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's their their their tooomom. tooomombs. tooombs. their their their their their. their. their their. their their their their their their their. their their their their. their their. their their their. their. their. their. their their. their. their their. their their. their tooom. tooom. tooombs. tooombs. tooombea. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. to. to.... We have to see the bulges. That's fine. The issue, I bet you, I bet you, I bet you this. I bet if we saw images, we'd be like, what? Because it's the 60s and like...
Starting point is 00:15:37 I was expecting like a, like a, like a... Right. And it's just like, pants. But it's the 60s. But it's this is the 60s, the 60s. Okay, but it's this is layered. This is a 12 year old. It's a fascinating, fascinating stuff. Yeah, that the 12 year old did this and the mom is mortified. I think if they, it's a tough thing and I'm not a parent so I can't. But I can remember when I was 12. The problem is when you when you give a huge reaction to information,
Starting point is 00:16:05 it's like, what I just said was crazy. Okay, I'm going to tell other people because this is crazy. I'm sitting on, I got the scoop. I'm going to tell my friends because this is crazy. Yeah, apparently this is crazy. If their reaction was, oh, cool, she may not have told anyone. That is interesting. But you also don't want want want want want want want want want to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to told anyone. That is interesting. But you also don't want to punish a kid's curiosity.
Starting point is 00:16:26 Right. Hey, that's important too. Like they're learning shit. And this isn't like some awful thing. It's a real thing that happened. I don't know. The dad can always go the Tombo route, which is where They still, bo, they still punish the kid, but then the dad
Starting point is 00:16:46 comes like around later and there's like, so listen up. That's so what Ray my dad would do. He's like, that was kind of funny. Just like don't let the parents of your friends hear that. My dad would always do that with my mom, he'd be like, listen, she's just... Yeah, exactly. Oh, did your parents put you in the middle of them, too? Well, never in the middle. He always just was just like,
Starting point is 00:17:11 I gotta do this for your mother. Like, I understand that I'm the cold guy. Just so you know, I'm not the bad guy. I'm not the bad guy that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking that was freaking was freaking was freaking was freaking was freaking was freaking was freaking that was that the media making their dicks smaller, bigger, as much as you want, because it's funny. Your mother doesn't like it. Because I feel conflicted because I also feel it's very important for the parents to like be in sync.
Starting point is 00:17:36 Yeah. Because this is not great because it comes across like he's kind of like going like, ah, she's crazy, whatever. I think in the name of humor, like I remember like finding things when I was younger that my dad and I both laughed at was like a together moment. It's so huge. Like, yeah, because usually it's hard to both giggle at the same thing because one's
Starting point is 00:18:01 and not, it's completely different ages. I think there's also a little middle ground here of like, that's, that's, that's, that's, that, that, that, that, that, that, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, they, they, that's, that, that's, that middle ground here of like that her telling them that that fact be like that's a crazy fact don't but don't share that fact with other people that's a very sensitive fact that's very you know private information that might make people uncomfortable if you tell them and then if she went and told other people then it's hey, we're not punishing you because of that fact. We're punishing you because we told you something and you didn't listen to us. But also if I'm a 12-year-old girl and I make my dad we laughing from something I just said. It's better believe I'm doing it again. Yeah. Some comments here. I did the same thing when I was 12, LOL, and it's not being used in an insulting or joking way.
Starting point is 00:18:46 It's being used in a factual context. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Opie responded, yeah, to me, the fact that she's using the medically accurate term and telling a true story that, I guess, is somewhat historically relevant, she was just yelling, penis, penis for no reason. Which when we were kids, my brother used to do that all the time, but he was four. That would be different, but in this context, eh?
Starting point is 00:19:09 Someone said, to middle school kids, Dick jokes are the funniest, not even jokes, just the word or anything related. Source, middle school teacher who is I've learned to just ignore it and not comment because whenever I've made a big deal and told them to stop, it just happens more. And lastly, someone said, if this is the worst penis-related story your kid has, I'd just say ignore it till it passes and tell your wife to chill because I've been a 12-year-old girl and heard way worse worse thoust you were the sergeant character in a war movie, warning new recruits. That's not relevant, but it made me laugh, so thank you. Yeah, I, it's always a thought that I've had with, when I hear about parents and like with my parents, or I'm like, you do know that anything you hear your kids say, way worse shit is being said amongst them and their friends. And you cannot stop that to a large. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I I I, th. th. I, th. th. I, th. th. I th. th. I th th th th th th th th th th that to the to to the toeeeeee. th toeeeeeeeeeeee. th theee. th ir friends. And you cannot stop that to a large degree
Starting point is 00:20:06 And I feel like I don't know it's it's a tough thing where when you make things like don't talk about this and don't say it's like Then you're gonna talk about it. Yeah, and it feels like she's really online this girl, so she's gonna She's super online. I'm gonna. She's super online. I can't imagine being a parent and I'm th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi's thi's thi's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. th. I's th. th. th. th. I's a th. I's a th. I's a th. I's a th. I's a th. I's a th. I's a th. I's a th. I's a th. I's a the th. I's a the the th. I's a th. I's a thi. I's a the the the thi. I's a the the the the the the the the thi's a thi. I's a thi's a thi. I can't imagine being a parent and having a kid who has a phone and can just like learn the whole world whenever they want. Literally. Like literally be like, how do you make a penis smaller? And you know what I mean? Or what is that? You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:20:34 That's wild. Small little update. Oh, did they take her by the time daughter was dropped off. Instead, we reiterated some sex ed stuff and told her it's important to keep subject matter appropriate to the situation. She was receptive to these messages. Dad comes over for dinner almost every day and he usually shows up early. So he got here half an hour ago. Daughter set up the TV and they started watching Batman on Toobie, of course. Five minutes in, Dad leans over to daughter. Dad. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the thi the th. thi to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. She th. She the the th. She the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeat. toe. toe. the. the. the. the. the.ans over to daughter. Dad, he says the daughter's name. Yeah, grandpa? I can see Robin's penis. Daughter and dad both lost it. I look at wife, her face is totally blank. I can tell she's seething on the inside. She said she's going to take a bubble bath. She's still in there. I don't know if I should bring her a glass of wine to mellow her out or leave her the hell alone. Thanks dad. That's fucking hilarious. This feels right out of an episode of Everyone Loves Raymond.
Starting point is 00:21:27 Yeah, yeah. I can see Robin's penis. And Ray Ramona goes, Dad. Oh, come on, guys. There it is. Thank you. Thank you. I think, honestly, after reading that little thing about what happened with the grandpa, I'd be kind of pissed of the grandpa. I'd be like, oh yeah. Don't talk about all these dicks with my 12-year-old daughter. It's kind of like my, I've told the story before, but my oldest brother when he was a little kid, he couldn't say truc, it would come out as fuck, yeah. And my grandma, just all the ta ti. I'd be like, to to be, to be, to be, told, told, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, told, told, thr, thr, thr, thr, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, they thi, thi, thi, their, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, tol, tol, tol, tol, toluu, tolu. tolu. tolu. tolu. tolu. tolu. to toda, to to to to to toli, to toli. toda, tole, tole, tolu. tolu. tolu. just stoked about it. She was just always trying to get him to say it. Yeah, but it's like in that instance it was like the grandpa
Starting point is 00:22:08 talking about it. I'd just be like, yeah let's keep it a little g-rated around my kid. Don't talk about, yeah. Don't talk about seeing someone else's penis. Yeah. If she says it, it's funny because she doesn't really understand the weight of what she's th th th th th th th th th th th th th the th th th th th the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the the the thi thi the the the the th th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th is th is th is thi thi thi thi thi thi thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. thi thi to a 12-year-old about this. I get that. I get that. I totally get that. And I simultaneously feel like we are so weird about talking about anything sexually related to parents talking to their kids about anything. And we're so weird about it. But there's also the other side of like, yeah, but also that's kind of weird to be pointing out like, because if it would,
Starting point is 00:22:45 I think it would come across different, I mean it is inappropriate in that context, but if the grandpa was talking about women on, that he was seeing on the TV screen, it's like, that's, right. That's weird. Next story, am I the asshole for not having much of a reaction to my daughter coming out and introducing us to her partner? Okay, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, that, that, that, like tho, like thi, like thi, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I'm thi, thi. I thi, us to her partner? Okay, here we go. My daughter is 23 and she requested to have dinner with my wife and I because she had something important to tell us. She came out and introduced us to her partner. My wife was emotional, gave her a big hug, and told her how proud she was.
Starting point is 00:23:18 I on the other hand did not react to her coming out. I honestly don't that the part. toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, to to to to to to to to to to the to the too, the th thi, th the th thi, th thrown, I, I, I, I, the th to to to the the the told, told, I, I, too, and, I, and, I, and, I, I, and, I, I, and, I, I, and, I, I, I, I, and, I, I, and, I, I, I, I, I, I, and, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the thi, I, the the thr-s, thr-s, the the thr-s, thr-s, th thr-s, thr-s, thr-s, thr-s, the thr-s, her partner was cool and that she was very interesting. My wife told me I was rude for ignoring our daughter's announcement. I told my wife that I did not care who she was attracted to at all. All I cared about was if she was happy. I tried to explain I am not acknowledging a different view. I do not see it that way. But am I the asshole? Should I apologize to my daughter and her partner? Edit, for added context,
Starting point is 00:23:54 I did not treat her situation as any different from her brothers. I took the time to get to know the person they were each with. the person. the person.reated it differently because they are different situations and ignoring that fact does not help. There's a little update here. Thanks for the input. Everyone is right. I should have just asked my daughter. I will see if she is free tomorrow for some coffee and have a chat with her. I am sure my wife's words just got to me but only one way to find out right. Thanks again. Okay, so it's his wife who is saying all this stuff. The daughter, we don't even know what the daughter's reaction is. She could be totally chill with it, but the what his wife is calling him homophobic for
Starting point is 00:24:36 yeah. According to him, having the same reaction to this as he did with his other children who brought their partners around. Did she expect him to this as he did with his other children who brought their partners around. Did she expect him to like go get rainbow socks for her and like get some the confetti poppers and stuff? We've brought up rainbow socks before that. Yeah. Yeah. It's like it seems that's it seems that's the mom's interpretation. Yeah. Cool. And he's just having a very he sounds like a lot of dads I know, which are just like, okay, okay, good. Sounds like she's homophobic, actually. To be honest, it feels like, yeah, it feels, I agree, it feels like two, two older people
Starting point is 00:25:13 trying to out woke each other. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Like, either he's being like super dad about it and just like not making a big deal out of anything, Or he's trying to be super welcome be like, if I make a deal out of that, that makes you different. And you are just like everyone. And in my opinion, that's the take. That is the take. That is the take.
Starting point is 00:25:33 But he is maybe doing it a little too far to be like right. We're just you, great. But like making a whole ordeal out of it I'd be like, yeah. Do you actually mean this? And I'm assuming this is just how he's like all the time. Right. Because what I would say is what I can see from like the daughter's perspective is when you just don't give much a response, you then are going well what what are you actually actually actually actually actually actually actually actually actually actually actually th? th? th? the th? th? th. the th. th. you then are going, well, what are you actually thinking? But if he's saying, this is how I responded to the other kids, and if that's correct, then I don't see anything wrong with that.
Starting point is 00:26:12 Then that's his genuine reaction. And I do think it's weird that the wife says, like, well, this is a different situation. It's like, I'm like, no. It shouldn't see. Yeah, it seems like she's that she's that she's that she's that she's that she's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's trying to be like, well, I'm so scared to be homophobic in the situation that I'm actually going to call that out as homophobia, where it's like, whoa, whoa, like, I think she's, they're both just, I think, freaking out a little. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:34 He's not, he's not. I think the thing that if I was in his situation that I would acknowledge is just like, you, you, you, you, you, tho, tho, tho, th, th, th, th, tho, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, like, tho, tho, that, that, that, like, thi, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, thi. I or you, I'm so glad you get to just be open and honest about it and I hope you know like I don't think anything of it. Like I think the same as the other situations with your other siblings. Yeah. It's all good. Hey, the takeaway is neither of them care, so that's a win. So that's a win. Honestly, right. Yeah. I almost wonder if she held off on talking to them. I, the, the, to, to, to, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to the their, like their to to to to to to to to to to to their their to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their, I their, I to to to to to their, I their, I their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the. I the. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi, I thi, I th win. So that's a win. Honestly, right. Yeah. I almost wonder if she held off on talking to them about this because she was like, are they going to try to outwoke each other? Oh God, are they going to have a thing because of this? Whatever. And it's, I don't think so, but yeah. I feel like maybe the mom was so scared that it could go wrong that she might thia tho tho tho th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi tho. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that's to to that's that's to to to to theeeeee. to to theeee. theeeee. the. thi thi that it could go wrong that she might have projected it a little bit or she was like reading her husband too harshly and she was like, smile, honey.
Starting point is 00:27:31 Some comments here. Not the asshole. I'm a lesbian. When I came out to my parents, they basically reacted with, that's nice dear. My sexuality didn't change my relationship with them. In my opinion, that's how it should be. OP responded, that is a good way of putting it. That was my reaction. That's nice, dear. Someone else said, it's the ideal we're striving for,
Starting point is 00:27:51 but the situation we're living in right now is hostile towards queer identity still. So they're not the same. It takes no courage to be publicly straight anywhere. Part of part to to to to to to to their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. thoom. thoom. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the. the. the. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the. the. the. t t t t tttttttttoday. today. today. today. tttoday. today. today. today. tha today. today. te. to encourage and show loud support for people who have the courage to live as themselves in a society that's trying to criminalize their existence. That being said, I don't think O.P. is an asshole in this situation either. And lastly someone said when I told my dad I liked girls he said me too. O.P. responded, good response. And had she told us when she was younger, I probably would have said the same. Wife probably would have smacked me upside my head. Yeah, I think those are all valid points.
Starting point is 00:28:28 Yeah, I mean. But I wonder if at the end of the day, the daughter just fully knows her parents and knew this reaction was coming. Yeah. And at the end of the day, it's like, the most important part is her and them checking in with her. Update, since it always bothered me when people would ghost on threads without giving updates, here it is. I did not have much time with my daughter. She had a prior engagement, but we had some coffee.
Starting point is 00:28:54 We spoke about the evening as I suspected, she did not have an issue with it. And she also felt it was self-explanatory when she introduced her girlfriend. She corrected me since I referred to her to her to her to her to her to her to her, to her, to her, to to to to to, to, to, to, to, the the the the the the the the the the their, their, their, their, their, I, I, the the their, their, the the, and, I, the, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, the the the the the the the the the the the the the their, their, their, their, their, the, theat, theat, theat, the most most, the most, the most, theat, the most, the most, the most, the most, the most, to her as a partner, but they view each other as girlfriend and girlfriend. The coming out was more so her girlfriend's idea. My daughter said she was going to reach out because while she had no issues with my reactions, her girlfriend thought it was weird how I kind of brushed off the response and treated this situation as if they were a straight couple.
Starting point is 00:29:20 My daughter did try to explain that to to to to to to explain to explain to explain to to explain to explain to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the explain that it is just the person I am. Explained how she preferred my non-reaction versus making it a big deal. She told the story of how she came to me first when she had her first period because she knew my wife would make a huge fuss over simple biology. You fucking called it. I told her, I made an am I the assile post, and we laughed over some of the comments. We are going to arrange to arrange to arrange to arrange to arrange to arrange to arrange to arrange to arrange to arrange the the their their their their their the comments. We are going to arrange another date and this time we will have a more special event for the sake of her girlfriend, since she did feel slightly offended by being treated as if they were a straight couple. My daughter had no issues overall, but I will correct the course. She was slightly disappointed I did not make a dad joke about her coming out.
Starting point is 00:29:58 I did express that my love for her would never change and I told her I hoped she did not wait so long because she thought I would think differently. She just told me I never told you because it was not important to her. She knew I would not care either way. I doubt I will add more updates after this but I might check in every so often. I do appreciate all the varied viewpoints and please understand it was not my intention to marginalize the hardships of LGBTQA plus face in this world. I know it may be a selfish and self-centered view, but I simply treat others how I wish and want to be treated. I do hope everyone has a wonderful week.
Starting point is 00:30:34 Look, I'll say for a guy, I'm assuming with the 23-year-old daughter, he's at least in his 50s. This guy rules. The bar is low. Also, what a Reddit family. They have experiences before of him posting on Reddit about her and his reaction? Oh, no, I think he's telling her that he posted on Reddit for this situation. Oh, copy, copy, copy, copy, okay.
Starting point is 00:30:57 the period. That is fascinating that she went to him. I don't have sisters or anything. So I don't have, I don't know what the... Well, that just shows that mommy makes a big deal about stuff. She is, it's just huge reactions. Yeah, sometimes we don't want to do that. Yeah, sometimes a huge positive reaction is like, oh, it's still a huge reaction and sometimes you don't want anything.
Starting point is 00:31:20 Yeah. Because it's always just like, all right. And they're like, well, that could have been more fun. It's like, where I was like, they're going to kick me out and I'll be hopeless. You know, it's like it's, yeah, I just love it. I love it. No, I mean, truly, like, it's, it's fun. This is another sitcom family. Yeah, you th, you th, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, th. Yeah, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that, that, that's, it's, it's, that's, it's, it's, that's that's that's that's that's that's th. This is another sitcom family. Yeah. Keep having sitcom families in here.
Starting point is 00:31:46 When we opened and we went, I didn't even think we'd have so much sitcom. Like, this is the guy that's like, it's like, dad, I'm gay. That's great. The lawn needs to get mowed. Yeah. Right. So I don't care. That's literally how my dad. Boom bump. Two for two. Two for two. It's pretty awesome. Here we go.
Starting point is 00:32:05 Next story. This comes from Tales from your server. So, you see how this is wholesome. Here we go. Awesome new manager breaks cycle with homeless guy outside. Okay. My old manager was a real working for the weekend type and never went out of their way for us or the customers no matter what.
Starting point is 00:32:23 We had a homeless the the the homeless the homeless th what. We had a homeless guy who camped out in our back alley because a lot of heat comes off a vent back there. One of the most difficult things about her was that she'd always make us toss him out because he was visible to customers from the main entrance. She's gone and we have a new manager now. the first week. One of the employees said, hey, that guy's back. And the new the the their their, their, their, their, thiiiii, thi, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thin, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. thi, th. thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. He, th. He, th. He, th. He, th. He, th. He, thi. He, thi. He's, thin, the. He's, thr. He's, thrown, thrown, the. the. thea. thea. thea. thea. thea. theeea. the. the.the new manager said, is this guy here often? And we told her the whole story. She asked what our interactions with him had been like, and we told her perfectly pleasant considering the circumstances. She walks out, shakes the guy's hand, and offers him a dishwashing job on a trial basis. She had one of the bus boys help him get cleaned up, and put him right to work. He knocked it out of the park, made good on his money, and got staffed dinner. She told him he was welcome to come back to work any night of the week, and if he was consistent, she'd see about getting him hired. That was two weeks ago, and he started on a permanent basis today.
Starting point is 00:33:14 Uh-huh. And an edit to add, I can't believe how this post is blown up. I just showed it to him, and he was honestly, he was honestly, he was honestly, he was honestly, the the the the thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. thi, thi, thi, thi, the thi, the thi, the thi, thi, the the the the the the the the the thean, thean, thi. thean, thi, thi, thi, thi, to too and he was honestly a bit freaked out by the whole thing, but touched by the incredible support and personal stories people shared. Now that he has a job, he's been able to move back in with his brother and is saving up all the money he makes here. He's a month clean and says things are going better now than they have been in a long time. He says thanks again. Damn. I'm getting full body chills. That is the sweetest story I've ever heard. That might be my favorite story I've ever heard on this show. Same. That's what you're supposed to do.
Starting point is 00:33:47 I know. I love this. What? How sweet! And then she showed in the post. I know. Are you guys looking at me? I just love about your own. There's nothing to say. Yeah, I know. Wow. It's amazing. It's even better than Watt pizza or whatever. What? Yeah, the mom.
Starting point is 00:34:14 There's a mom that offered her kid pizza and she was dancing and she said wet-ass pizza. Yeah, it's a good one. This is a legend. This is a legend. This is a legend. This is for sure a legend. This new manager. Good for everyone in that story. Solved it so fast. It's amazing.
Starting point is 00:34:29 Comments, this is beautiful. I was homeless a few years ago, and I got back on my feet because someone took a chance with me and I am eternally grateful. Someone else said, it will be interesting to see if he becomes an employee and gets himself back into housing, your new manager sounds like a terrific person to even have thought to offer him work. O.P. responds, she's a real class act, perfect balance of optimist and hard ass. She believes anyone is capable of excellence regardless of who they are, so she gives everyone equal opportunities to advance but holds everyone to the same high standard. Really great working environment. That sounds like the perfect manager. But where's this food service job? What? to to to to to to to to to the to the to the the the to the to the to the the they, to, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their their. Oh, their. Oh, their. Oh, their. Oh, their their, their their, their their their their their their their their their their th. Oh, th. Oh, their their th.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O.O. O.P.O.O. O.O. O.the perfect manager. But those are rare.
Starting point is 00:35:06 What? I was like, where's this food service job? Yeah. Talk about it because another low bar is managers. Right. And I feel like this manager they really, a lot. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:17 I don't know what else to say about that. Yeah, it makes me feel full like a Thanksgiving dinner. I know truly. It's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's a Thanksgiving dinner. I know, truly, it's just so filling and beautiful. Here's our next story. This one's an old one. It's from 2015. It's from the 1600s. It's from...
Starting point is 00:35:34 They had read it. My squire and I had a wonderful time. I pissed my pants and was excommunicated from the church. Today I fucked up by throwing my steak out a window. Unless this is Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Last night, my wife's boss from her brand new job invited us over for dinner. On the drive over, my wife reiterated to me many times just how important it was to make a good impression. I scoffed and arrogantly informed my silly wife that I will always make good impressions. My wife's boss is a single lady in her 50s so it
Starting point is 00:36:11 was just the three of us. We chit-chatted over drinks and salads and seemed to be really hitting it off. She laughed at my well-time, perfectly appropriate jokes and my wife seemed pleased. Soon she brought out the the A nice big juicy steak for each of us. As I began to cut into my steak, I was discouraged to discover how undercooked this steak was. Now, I've had my fair share of rare steak. I prefer medium, but I can handle rare. This was several minutes on a hot grill short of rare. I probably could have resuscitated the cow had I tried. Instead, I sat there fidgetting with my knife and fork, worrying about how I was going th how I was th how I was going the cow had I tried. Instead, I sat there fidgeting with my knife and fork, worrying about how I was going to get away with not eating this steak.
Starting point is 00:36:49 Claim veganism? No, I'd already feigned great enthusiasm upon seeing the steak. Just then, our hostess excused herself to the kitchen to take care of some dessert preparations. As I looked across the fancy dining room of this third story apartment. A cartoon light bulb appeared over my head. I knew I had to be decisive, realizing that she could return at any moment. I committed. I grabbed the steak with my hand, gently shook off the juice,
Starting point is 00:37:14 and it executed a perfect throw right through the center of the open window. Here's the big time fuck up. The window wasn't open. Her windows are just not clean! It was the cleanest freaking window you've ever seen in your life. That is, until my mostly raw slab of steak slammed up against it and slowly slid down, leaving a trail of bloody juice in its wake. My wife, whose steak was a nice, medium rare and was unaware of my predicament, turned jaw jaw dropped, and stared
Starting point is 00:37:45 at me like I was an alien from another planet. This look then slowly morphed into more of a, there is no place on this planet you can ever hide from me, expression of demonic anger. My wife's boss heard the thought of the stake on a window impact and came quickly. She took in the scene, the stake, the stake, and the stake sts th is th is th is th is thed thed thed thed the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the theateateateateateateateate, the they the the the their their their tho-a-a-a-a' their their their their their their the the, their the, the the, the, the the the, the the the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the thee theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeananeeananeded, toeeean, thean, theaneanthe window sill, the bloody trail, my empty plate, and then gave me an inquisitive, puzzled look. I just didn't know what to say. It felt like minutes of silence, but it was probably three or four seconds. Finally, the best I can manage was, I'm so sorry. I'm such a clutz.
Starting point is 00:38:15 I don't know. I was just cutting it, and it slipped. Just ask my wife. Ah! I realize I am a clutz, right, honey? No help coming from that direction. Oh, I will clean this up. I can't believe this. I'm so sorry, etc. etc. Both women continue to stare at me like I had escaped from the loony bin as I smeared the tooom.
Starting point is 00:38:36 the blood around the windowter my incoherent explanation. I knew no one was buying the story. I knew what I had to do. I sheepishly returned to my seat and proceeded to eat every bite of that disgusting, cold, chewy, bloody raw stay. I remain pretty quiet the rest of the evening. My wife's only two words to me since the incident are, I'm fine. No, she's not fine. No one in the world could be fine. Is this a prank? Is every Reddit story is an episode of Everyone Loves Raymond?
Starting point is 00:39:09 I was not to say, this is a Seinfeld episode. This is what? I mean, look, there's always the possibility that they're fake. Always. But... It's just so funny. He ate the window steak? He ate the window steak. And then just like a silly mad wife, she went, I'm fine. Is this guy Peter Griffin?
Starting point is 00:39:28 Yeah. Comments, you should have grilled the steak under the pretense that you were killing off any germs it might have picked up on the floor. So, he responded, damn it, that's a good idea. Someone else said, all you had to do was ask if she could cook it for a little longer. There's nothing wrong with that at all. But hey, look on the bright side. You'll have a funny story to tell all your friends for years to come. Lastly, someone said, sir, you need to update your version of Windows. How many likes does that comment? I don't know. What would you do in the situation? Not throw my steak? I would never throw the steak. I would throw the steak. I think. I the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I throw. I throw. I throw. I throw throw throw throw. I the steak. I throw the steak. the steak. the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I the steak. the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I the steak. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the. I the. S. Sir. S. S. S. S, sir. S, sir. S, sir. S, sir. S, sir. S, sir. S, sir. S, sir. S, sir. S, sir. S, I thi. S the cook left the room, I think I would laugh
Starting point is 00:40:10 so hard I'd die. It was poor planning because if she came back and his entire steak was fully gone, he's like, it's like, he's like, uh, what a delightful steak. It's like, what a delightful steak. It's like, that's also insane. You ate that so fast, man. It's sink to grab it and frisbee it out of there. It's wild. I went into the story thinking he's going to throw it out of a car. Yeah, me too. I thought so, too. I thought he was driving and he was like, this is bad.
Starting point is 00:40:35 And then it would like, I, I, but I also, I like medium rare, so I could probably handle, if a steak was super rare, I'd just be like, all right. I feel like I'm a master at cutting around, moving around and making it look like I made a dent, but I don't eat much of it. I don't really care about steak, I think it's good. I don't, I'm not, there's people who eat steak and they're like, they. They're like, for your birthday, we're going to bring you to a steak dinner. Right, so I'd probably just, I probably wouldn't have gotten into that situation. I'd be like, I actually don't want a steak.
Starting point is 00:41:10 Oh, you wouldn't have even asked for it on the plate. Yeah. Okay. Or I would have been like, I can't eat this. This gross. Please cook. Have you ever been in a situation where people served you food that you that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that you don't like. Yeah. And I'm really good at like moving it around and putting in putting some on the fork. I think the idea of like trying to get rid of it is so scary. No, that's some Mr. Bean shit. Yeah, like just for to see that person come in and see you getting rid of it. Actually I think this is a Mr. Beans. There is a skimps. There is a ski. that's a. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. the. th. the. th. th. the, th. the, th. the, th. th. the, the, the, the, the, the, th. th. the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the th. th. th. th. t. t. try. try. try. try. tha. try. try. try. try. try. the the the the the the the the the th. the try. Beans. There is a skit where he gets a bunch of like raw meat that he won't eat and so he's hiding it throughout the whole place and then they slowly discover it and every time they discover like a new piece of
Starting point is 00:41:50 meat like in a napkin stuff he's just he's just he's just like he's just like a. He's just like oh oh like it's like in a jacket like he's like it. Like he's a that's it's a they like it's a they like it's a they like it's a they. It's a they. It's a they. It's a they. It's a they. It's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's a their it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's a they. It's a they. It's a they. It's a they. It's a they. It's a they. It's a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. It's the the they. It's they. It's the the the the the like a steak thing and he like puts the napkins because he doesn't want to eat it and he just has them like in a jacket and then Elaine borrows the jacket and the meat store and there and dogs are chasing her. Yes and the tag is her going down the street right? Yeah, and all these dogs are chasing her. Wow, classic. Classic. I think this my meat at Windows. Small little update. Just got the first communication from my wife since I'm fine. She is at work.
Starting point is 00:42:27 The text said, good news. Boss's name, and I just had a good laugh over how much of a fucking idiot you are. I hope you know you will never live this down. Love you, you moron. That's good. I want a divorce. Update, update, we're divorced. Update, update. I forgot that this woman was the boss. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:46 I would be mortified if I was his wife. Cooking steak for guests, that's a tough thing to do. That's a bold move. Honestly, good for him. He just bonded those two people now. Yeah, it's true. They have a common enemy. Yeah. His the tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha. tha. thooma. thooma' thooma. thia' thoomoomoomoom. thoomoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tha. tha. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. the. toe. toea. toe. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. true. The wife and the boss. They have a common enemy. Yeah. His brain.
Starting point is 00:43:05 Here's our last story. Am I the asshole for not wanting my fiancé to dance to a love song dedicated to her late fiancé at our wedding? Before we met, my fiancé, Kayla, was engaged to a man she had dated for three years, who died in a part of her story. I accepted her relationship with her late fiancé's parents with open arms. They stayed very close and by the time we started dating, they were basically like a second set of parents to her.
Starting point is 00:43:36 Kayla's real parents and her late fiance's parents are all amazing people. So I consider myself pretty lucky lucky lucky lucky lucky lucky lucky lucky lucky to to to to have to have to have to have to have to have the the their their their their their their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, too, too, too, too, to to to to their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the the their, the th th th th th th the th th th th th th th th th th th ttthe the the the the th wedding is coming up in May and Kayla told me that after her father-daughter dance, she would like to have a second dance with her late fiancé's father to the song Vanilla Twilight. She asked me if I was comfortable with that, and since I didn't want to be that guy, and say no, I said yes. But really, it makes me uncomfortable that she would be dancing to a love song dedicated to another man at our wedding. I am happy to make space in our lives for his memory. We have a photo of him on our mantle at home, and we make it a point to commemorate his birthday and the anniversary of his death. I feel like I am understanding and supportive when she has bad days, and I'm 100% fine with having his parents at the wedding because, like I said, we are all all a family But I also feel like our wedding is one day. That should be all about our relationship.
Starting point is 00:44:28 Am I the jerk if I ask her to reconsider this dance? What are the best compromises here? That's heavy. That's real heavy. I'll say, I think what he's doing is really hard to champion for yourself in a space that is not occup- that it's about it's not about you in that story in that time of her life but his wedding is also about him. That's hard. That's really hard. It's a difficult. It's so tough and grief is, as we see from these stories, like
Starting point is 00:45:00 grief is just so different in every situation. So how people go about it is so different. Yeah, because also if you don't speak up, he could be, you don't want someone just like not being fully honest in your relationship if something makes you uncomfortable. That lack of communication can build resentment and then five years down the line, there's no respect. Weddings are also like weddings, you know, weddings are so weddings. Weddings are so weddings. know, they're all big. Weddings are so weddings. Yeah, they are.
Starting point is 00:45:28 Yeah. So the verdict was not the asshole. Comments here, not the asshole. You might want to honestly ask her to sit down and reconsider if she is ready to be married to someone else, though. She still sounds very much invested in this other man, whether he is alive or not. And she just doesn't sound to to to another person. Ask her if she is truly ready to commit or she is just honestly doing it because she thinks she should or
Starting point is 00:45:52 it will help her move on. Opie responded, I guess it sounds like he is constantly on her mind because I only wrote two paragraphs that were wholly focused, But it has been about seven years since he died, and I think she has processed her grief in a healthy way and doesn't dwell on it. We have our own inside jokes and our hobbies and our own hobbies and experiences that are unique to us. I can truly say I'm marrying my favorite person in the world. We are each other's absolute best friend. I don't have any illusions that our life together will entail her forgetting about her late fiancé, nor would I want that. Two an an that that that that that that th anniversary that that th anniversary th anniversary that th anniversary that th anniversary anniversary that th anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary anniversary that that that that that that that that that that th anniversary thi thi tho-the that that tho-a-a-a-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-s, thuu-s, thu-s tho-s, tho-s tho-s, tho'-s. tho'-s. tho'-so'-so'-so'-so'-so'-so'-no'-no'-no'-no'-s. tho'-s. Nor would I want that. Two anniversaries a year and a photo really don't represent a significant portion of her thoughts and feelings. Yeah, you know.
Starting point is 00:46:32 I don't know what to say. You know, I think it is tough as this comment, like clearly demonstrates. We have so little to work off of, that it's hard to know, like, the real situation with the real, and, like, and, and, like, like, and, the their, the the the the the thiiii, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi., thi., to thi., tootheir relationship but the good news is we have an update. Hey I love that! I want stuff that says update like a hat and I want you to be like... Or a shirt or something? Yeah, merch. Two months ago I married the love of my life. I was thinking about this thread the other day how how it went, and where my head was at when I made it, and I thought you guys might like an update. A little anticlimactically, the thing I was stressing about was a bit of a miscommunication, which probably happens
Starting point is 00:47:12 a lot here. Kaila wanted to dance with her late fiancé's. I'll go ahead and just call him Luke, the toluc, the throwne. Luke, thi. Luke, thi. Luke, thi. Lu. Lu. Lu. Lu. Lu. Lu. Lu. Lu. Lu. Lu. Lu. Lu. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I's thi. I's thi. I's thi. I'ma. I'ma. I'ma. Andeea. Andea. Andea.a. Andea. thea.a. thi. thi, not the set and stone top choice like I had thought. I and a lot of other commenters in the original thread spent a lot of time overanalyzing the lyrics to that song looking for hidden meaning in every word. It turns out she hadn't put much more thought into the suggestion then, this is a kind of sad song that I like. We got together together together together together together together together together together todn't todn't tod tod tod thoged thr-a thin. thin. thin. thin' thin' thin' thin' tho' that, that, thin'n't, I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th. I th. I th. I th. I, I th. I'm th. I'm th thin', I'm thin'n't, I'm thr-a, I'm thr-a, I'm thr-a'n't, I'm a thr-a'n'n'n'n'n't thr-a'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n't, I, I, Ilists of possible first dance songs for us, songs for when she walks down the aisle, music to play at the reception, and song choices for her dance with Luke's father. We spent hours listening to them all and talking about the wedding and talking about the wedding. We even made a tournament-style bracket for our first dance song in her journal and put songs until the victor emerged. And at the end, we talked about the wedding, our relationship, Luke, and their relationship, and
Starting point is 00:48:07 grief. We talked about what it was like when she when she lost him, and what it was like for me when I lost my mom at a young age, what a family is and all the things we're hopeful for in the future. We stayed up until three in the morning, just thi th. th. th. th. the th. the th. th. th. their th. th. their. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thrown. thr-in. throwns, thr. thr-a. thate the the the the the thoes the the the the the the the. the. the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the th. that that that that that that that toe. We was toe. We's toe. Wea. Wea. And, toa. Wea. toean. Wea. Wea. toea. Wea. toea. ta. ta. ta. ta. t and laughing and crying a little, and I'm so glad for it. After getting bombarded by dozens of different opinions from dozens of different people earlier that day, I had been worried that I was going to have a conflict with my fiance shortly before our wedding, but there was no conflict, just pure memory. After that night, I started putting in more effort to be involved with the wedding, I actually asked for things I wanted, which Kayla actually really appreciated. We also took a long weekend, a couple of weeks before the wedding, to go on a camping trip together just the two of us,
Starting point is 00:48:47 which I highly recommend to anyone who is getting married. Overall, there was a complete flip in my feelings leading up to the wedding, from being somewhat insecure and excited but nervous, to being completely at ease, excited and feeling stronger in my relationship than ever. The wedding day the day the day the day the day the day the day the day the day the day the day the day the day the day the day the day the day the day the day their their their their was their was their was their was their. Kayla and Luke's father had their dance to lean on me and I also had a dance with Kayla's mom and it was very emotional in a good way. I really felt that the day was a celebration for our love. I was genuinely happy that Luke's
Starting point is 00:49:15 parents were there to celebrate along with us because they're they are very much members of our family and I wish I had the space to describe all the ways they've been there for us through the years. My amazing wife is who she is because of all the experiences that has that she has had in her life. I don't want to be the kind of man who asked her to pretend that she has never loved me, loved before me, or pretend that her grief should how glad I am that we shared that night together and that the wedding was nothing but love and celebration. I never thought I could be so happy. Damn. Uh-oh.
Starting point is 00:49:51 We're both. I'm like, they're ready. Yeah. They're sitting. That's crazy. Oh my gosh. It's so sweet. It's like next level. Oh us. It's like what we're crying.
Starting point is 00:50:11 Oh my gosh, what I also love about this that I was going to say before is that like he didn't make any assumptions about how she feels. And I feel like on this, we see this a lot where it's like someone goes, this is how I feel, I feel threatened by this. It must mean that she's not over it, and it must mean that she's not into me, or it must mean this. And he didn't put any words in her mouth or tell her how she feels at all.
Starting point is 00:50:33 He just was like, this is emotional intelligence on the max level. There's one comment here, and it is not of that caliber. OK, because it's Reddit. Yeah, and we're back. And we're back to Reddit stories. Someone commented, I mean, if Luke hadn't passed away, your wife would be with him. OP responds to this. This line of thinking has never bothered me. Because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because it, because it, to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that, that, that that, that's that's that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. the. the. that that the. that that that's that's that's the. that's that's that's the. that's that's thatexxxx, the. the. that's that's.P. responds to this. This line of thinking has never bothered me because it can be applied to so many other situations. All of life is millions of branching paths of choices that we
Starting point is 00:51:13 do and do not make. It doesn't bother me to think that my wife would be with Luke if he hadn't died because, well, he has died so that is not the situation. And it is only because that happened that my wife became the person I fell in love with. I have an ex-partner who I was very much in love with years ago but we split up due to circumstances beyond either of our control. If that hadn't happened then there's a good chance I would be married to her instead but that's not the situation. That doesn't diminish the love that I have for Me and who? That guy makes that comment like, well, you know, your wife would probably be with him. And I see the clouds parting in him with like a golden
Starting point is 00:51:49 aura around and like, yes, but. As O P, I'll say this. Yeah. Wow, this guy's incredible. this guy's incredible. All these families are incredible. Everyone here's good people. I that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thi. the the the the the the the the the the thoooooooooooooom, the thoooooooooooom, that's thooooom, that's that's that's. Good for Caleb. All these families are incredible. Everyone hears good people. I'd say so. I'd say that's a good story.
Starting point is 00:52:09 I think that just about sums it all up. Yeah. Let's call up, folks. I cried on set today. Me too. All of these stories were truly so wholesome. We've really been all over the place from pissing yourself to throw a stake out, attempting to throw a stake out a window, to the most emotionally mature response and assessment I've ever seen in my life. Yeah. Just, we've been on a journey today. Truly.
Starting point is 00:52:39 It's just, there's just, there's such humanity in these. Yeah. There's like, you know, like, not forgiveness, but there's just like understanding and like humbling nice things. I'm trying to think of like the, I think the main difference between wholesome stories like this and the average stories that we have where things are messy and stuff. It's just depth. It's people who are willing to like kind of seek more layers. Yeah. I'd say it's pausing. Like I feel like it's taking a breath before going off of an assumption. Like, like that the two parents and the daughter where it's like, I'm gonna take a second, I'm gonna wait until she has a free moment tomorrow, we're gonna have coffee and we're gonna talk about it right instead of being like a to see B to C 1 to 2 to 10 you know like you're going so
Starting point is 00:53:27 fast yeah and letting things just go fast do think when he got the steak back he tried to cut it again but was like to like justify how he yeah yeah really held on to it like grab one bare hand and then he's like do you think she thin th th th th th th th th th th th th th the th the th the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the too I I I I'm too too too too too too too too to the the the the the the the the the the the the's like, Do you think she rinsed it off? Because it surely fell on the ground after hitting the window. Rinsed it off. I just, there's no version where it's good now. No. Either you rinse it off, sink. Or you're just picking up a...
Starting point is 00:53:55 You've heard of a spice rub, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I think in the story he just picked it up. If you're that, at that point, if you're there, you're right, I should eat the carpet steak. You're gonna do it. What a time. What a time. Well, thank you all for watching. I hope this warmed your heart like it warmed ours.
Starting point is 00:54:15 And we'll see you next Saturday. I don't to the insanity. Steak on the window, mess. That's right. Have a good Saturday. Yeah, have a good Saturday and we'll see you later. Goodbye. D-da-da.
Starting point is 00:54:34 And your host, Shane Top.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.