Something Rhymes with Purple - Neptune’s Dandruff

Episode Date: May 18, 2021

It’s all aboard the HMS Purple this week as Admirals Dent and Brandreth navigate their way through the linguistic flotsam and jetsam of the Royal Navy. With a good wind behind them they sail through the official ranks before unpicking the complex slang used above and below deck.  And there’s time for a quick word with the Sky Boatswain before sitting down to a delicious helping of ‘Adam and Eve on a raft’. We hope you like the cut of their jib! As always we get through as many of your questions as we can - this week focussing on ‘codswallop’, ‘tosh’ and ‘gaffer’ - Susie has three brilliant words to commit to memory, and Gyles questions our baffling approach to plurals with a lovely, witty poem. A Somethin’ Else production. Smirting - flirting while you’re smoking Nippitatum - a strong drink Neckum, Swinkum, Swankum - the three draughts you can pour from a keg of ale Try 6 free issues of The Week magazine worth £23.94 today. Go to http://bit.ly/SomethingRhymeswithPurple and use your special code PURPLE to claim your 6 week free trial today. Don’t forget, we’ve got a lovely new range of merchandise available from https://kontraband.shop/collections/something-rhymes-with-purple so get your mugs, t-shirts, and tote bags today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What's up y'all it's your man Mark Strong Strizzy and your girl Jem the Jem of all Jems and we're hosting Olympic FOMO your essential recap podcast of the 2024 Olympic Games in 20 minutes or less every day we'll be going behind the scenes for all the wins

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with American Express. Unmissable show coming up? Good news. We've got access to pre-sale tickets so you don't miss it. Meeting with friends before the show? We can book your reservation. And when you get to the main We'll see you next time. Annex. Benefits vary by card. Other conditions apply. Something else. Hello, and a warm welcome to Something Rhymes with Purple. This is our 111th episode, which is appropriate because today's subject, well, you'll discover why it's appropriate. The number 111 is known as a Nelson in cricket,

supposedly because Admiral Lord Nelson died with only one arm, one eye and one leg, 1-1-1. So when you score 111, it's a Nelson. When we first mentioned this in an episode last year, a purple person, Ivan Hamilton, mentioned this in an episode last year. A purple person, Ivan Hamilton, possibly related to Lady Hamilton, mistress of Horatio Nelson. Who knows? Anyway, he pointed out that Nelson didn't lose a leg. But when has the truth or logic ever gotten in the way of the English language? That would be a good episode.

It would be, wouldn't it? That's Susie Dent. You recognise her voice? Susie, how are you? How's your week been? I'm fine. And actually, that was a little bit disingenuous of me because our next episode is going to be all about the illogical way in which English has evolved over the years. So yeah, so that one fits really nicely into that. But I'm fine, thank you very much. Just slowly, slowly getting used to easing out of lockdown as we are in Britain. A bit bumpy though, I would say. How about you? Bumpy, very much so. And for a reason. I am going to sleep every night and not sleeping very well. I wake at about four in the morning, every morning. Me too. And I've been trying to work out ways of getting to sleep.

And knowing we're going to do this particular episode, I have, for the last seven days, pictured myself at sea at night. And this has not really helped, but the idea was that I'd wake up at four in the morning and I'd sort of roll from side to side in the bed as though I'm on the ocean, going from side to side. And I've been working my way through the ranks in the Royal Navy. This is a kind of memory game. And because of Lord Nelson,

I know he was an admiral of the fleet. And because I have written this biography of the Duke of Edinburgh, and I know he was the Lord High Admiral, I thought, what are these ranks? And then I remember there was all that talk at the time of the Duke of Edinburgh's funeral about Prince Andrew, Duke of York, wanting to turn up dressed as an admiral, but he wanted to be a full admiral, not a rear admiral. And I thought, which comes first, an admiral, a rear admiral, a vice admiral? And I didn't know. And do you know? Just take the admirals for a start. Just see. And basically what I did was I started at the top with admiral and I worked my way down to the lowest rank, which I believe is midshipman. But let's see how far you can get. Admiral of the Feet in the British Royal Navy, that's the highest rank. What do you think comes

next? Well, the admiral I thought was assisted by a vice admiral is that right yes yeah well admiral of the fleet is the top admiral yes and then but next to him is an ordinary admiral yes yes and then he doesn't have a fleet but is an admiral he is assisted by who do you think the vice admiral vice adm Admiral. And then comes a Rear Admiral. Yeah. What comes below them? What's the rank below a Rear Admiral? Commander?

No. Okay. Commander is a couple of ranks below. Okay. Commodore. Oh, Commodore. Commodore is next. Oh, actually, because that comes from the French commandeur.

So it's linked to commander etymologically. And actually, I want to tell you where Admiral comes comes from and where admiral as well. Please do. Let me rattle through them, and then I want you to explain where they all come from. So commodore is next. After commodore, below commodore is a captain. Below a captain is a commander. Okay. And below a commander is a lieutenant commander. And I'd somehow thought that a lieutenant commander would be more senior to a commander, but no. And then below the lieutenant commander is a mere lieutenant, below the lieutenant is a sub-lieutenant, then you get down to a midshipman. So those are the ranks in the British Royal Navy. Of course, it's very different in other countries around the world. Just explain the origin, admiral. Something to do with being admirable?

around the world. Just explain the origin, admiral. Something to do with being admirable? Admiral is really interesting because it originally referred to an emir or a Muslim commander. It's from Arabic, emir meaning commander, and it was used in different titles of ranks. So not just the sea, you had an emir al-bar, which was commander of the sea. You had a commander of the water and so on. And the al at the end of admiral simply meant of the, if you like. So Amir al-Ma, I think it was, or Ma was a commander of the water. But I think Christian scholars didn't really recognise the fact that al was simply a suffix meaning of the. And so they just added it on. As in Sheikh Maktoum al-Makt al maktum exactly as in al maktum

exactly so they simply added it on to the amir bit and created admiral oh that is interesting that's where we got that one from and then the rear admiral i think that goes back to the days of uh naval sailing squadrons in the royal navy So each naval squadron would have an admiral at its head and they'd command from the centre of the ship. Then they'd be assisted by the vice admiral, if we said, and they commanded the lead ships in a battle. And then at the rear of the squadron, a third admiral would command the remaining ships.

And they were the most junior, really, because those ships were considered to be the least in peril, if you like. And that's why the rear admiral, the one at the back, literally, physically, was the most junior of the admiralty ranks. But to lower the tone for a moment, I recall reading the memoirs, the wartime memoirs of the jazz performer and writer George Melly. Oh, yeah. And he called his book Rum, Bum and the Lash. And it was a naval expression for some of the things that they got up to when they were in the Navy. And I think he viewed the Rear Admiral in rather a different way.

But anyway, it was a very entertaining book. So take us on to the Captain. Well, Captain is simply from the Latin caput, meaning head. And you've given us Admiral, you've given us Commodore, you've now given us Captain, meaning the head. Lieutenant, what is simply from the Latin caput, meaning head. And you've given us admiral, you've given us commodore, you've now given us captain, meaning the head. Lieutenant, what is lieutenant? So, lieutenant is just nice because I think from the pronunciation point of view, because we use the F and I think British speakers probably think

that we are somehow then superior in our pronunciation to the Americans who say lieutenant. But actually, lieutenant is closer to the etymology. And you know how much I love American English and swim against the tide, but it's from the French lieutenant. Lieutenant means a placeholder because a lieutenant was there as a placeholder instead of someone of more senior rank. And it's thought that at some point in its history a scribe or a scholar sort of got the the u and thought it was a v and it became lieutenant rather than lieutenant or lieutenant and that's how that evolved that's what we think and actually as you know we've got the whole submariners as well that's a whole different story so they too have got their own vocabulary which is

fascinating well thank you for teasing us with that and not telling us anything. I was only interested in the ones that I've given you. Admiral. So it's Admiral of the Fleet, Admiral, Vice Admiral, Rear Admiral, Commodore, Captain, Commander, Lieutenant Commander, Lieutenant, Sub-Lieutenant, Midshipman and Officer Cadet. So, Officer, what's the origin of Officer and what's the origin of Cadet? And then you'll have done the complete gamut of the British Royal Navy. of officer and what's the origin of cadet and then you'll have done the complete gamut of the British Royal Navy. So cadet is, I always think of snooker when I think of cadet because a snooker originally was a junior cadet. But cadet we think also goes back to that Latin caput meaning head.

So it was a little version of that, a cap de, C-A-P-D-E-T, which is like little head. So again, a little head, it would be like a junior, if you like. And the French, of course, gave us officer as well. That was after the Normans, but based on the Latin officium, meaning an officer simply or an office. Ah, a post, a position, and also the place. And also the place. These are nothing really compared to the names that they give each other.

So like any profession, and we've talked so much about this, there are different names, particularly within the armed forces, for particular people. They're normally very teasing nicknames. So those who patrol the sort of sea are in the Andrew, although quite who the Andrew was, no one knows. And alongside Andrew is Jack, of course, and that gave us Jack Tar. Who else have you got? You've got the New Sailors coming in and they're known as Muppets or Nozzers,

apparently, and they have to go through all sorts of rituals, which probably shouldn't be gone into too much here. And then, of course, they've got the Bish, who is the Padre, also called the Sky Bosun. Oh, I like that. Looking up at the sky, yes. Oh, you mentioned Bosun. Do you know what Bosun is? Yes.

That's one short for Boatswain, isn't it? B-O-A-T-S-W-A-I-N. Yes, and because the swain bit bit much like cockswain um for the cocks cocks and because it was an unstressed syllable like so often in english it became just a bit swallowed over time um yes you've got the club swinger that's the p.e teacher which i like these were taught i mean i think on every ship they'll probably have their variations on these. So these aren't gospel. These were from the sailors that I spoke to. You've got a Jack in the Dust, who was the stores man or stores woman,

because they worked amongst the flour and the biscuits. The cabbage mechanic for the chef. You've got the crumb brush, who's a steward in the mess and so on and so on. So, you know, there are all those official titles. And then, of course, all the kind of tribal ones and nicknames too. Oh, and the pox clerk was the STI doctor. Let's leave that one there. When I mentioned rum bum on the lash, you went totally silent.

Now you're talking about STIs as though we all know what they stand for. Sexually transmitted somethings? What are they? Infections. Ah, they used to be called STDs in my stand for, sexually transmitted somethings? What are they? Infections. Ah, they used to be called STDs in my day. Or was that something to do with a telephone? I can never remember. No, no, you'd be right. Can you get to the bottom, though, of the Jaktar thing? Why is it Jaktar? Because Jaktar is very old, isn't it? I mean, that goes back hundreds of years. And I know in HMS Spinafore, they're constantly referring to Jack Tar figures.

In fact, the leading character probably is called Jack Tar. What's the origin of Jack and Tar? Well, Jack is used as a generic name for a worker or an average Joe. There's another one. English is full of using first names in those kind of ways. And Jack Tar was the traditional sailor with the pair of breeches that were treated with high-grade tar. And I guess that made them sturdier. So yeah, that's where that one originated. And you can go back centuries for the tribal language. So grog, which we've talked about before, goes back to Admiral Edward Vernon, nicknamed Old Grog because he wore a coat made of grogram, a thick cloth. Do you remember ages ago also I told you about the two monikers that were mentioned in Francis Grose's classical dictionary of the vulgar tongue, where an admiral of the narrow seas was Jack's beak for a drunken

sailor who vomits all over his friend, where a vice admiral of the narrow seas was one who pees into his companion's shoes. Do you remember? I'll always remember those. Oh my goodness, the food. Cackle farts were eggs. One of my favourites, always cheers me up that. Adam and Eve on a raft.

Can you guess what that might be? Is it rhyming slang of some kind? Adam and Eve on a raft. I don't know. Is it sardines on toast? Two eggs on toast. Not far off. Oh, very good.

Not too far off. Oh, very good. I like that. Baboon arse. Don't ask me why. Corned beef. Oh, I can picture why. Elephant's footprints or Nelly's wellies.

Both slang for spam fritters. Spam. You remember spam. Floaters in the snow this is disgusting sausages and mash you can imagine we're all having a bit of a giggle over these pepper was sneeze sea salt was neptune's dandruff that's very clever and nooners uh not what you might think a drink as the sun passes over the yardarm at midday. Although I'm sure it has other meanings too. So, I mean, that's just, you know, that's just a little sprinkling

of some of their tribal jargon. There's loads more, but I'll stop there because honestly, I could go on and on. But it would be great if the purple people who have, you know, worked on the high seas and know it much better than we do, it'd be great if they could give us their own examples. Oh, shiver me main brace. I was saying that I can't get to sleep at four in the morning. I'm trying to go through the ranks of the Royal Navy. Now I've got all these extraordinary

words in my head. I'm never going to sleep again. Let us take a break and then return to the high seas. And we hope that'll be calmer. Bble knows it's hard to start conversations hey no too basic hi there still no what about hello handsome who knew you could give yourself the ick that's why bumble is changing how you start conversations you can now make the first move or not with opening moves you simply choose a question to be automatically sent to your matches. Then sit back and let your matches start the chat. Download Bumble and try it for yourself. What was the last thing that filled you with wonder,

that took you away from your desk or your car in traffic? Well, for us, and I'm going to guess for some of you, that thing is... Animal Bay! Hi, I'm Nick Friedman. I'm Lee Alec Murray. And I'm going to guess for some of you, that thing is... Anime! Hi, I'm Nick Friedman. I'm Lee Alec Murray. And I'm Leah President. And welcome to Crunchyroll Presents The Anime Effect. It's a weekly news show.

With the best celebrity guests. And hot takes galore. So join us every Friday wherever you get your podcasts and watch full video episodes on Crunchyroll or on the Crunchyroll YouTube channel. on Crunchyroll or on the Crunchyroll YouTube channel. What's that mean and what's it got to do with water? Well, you can probably guess where flotsam comes from because it's got the idea of floating, hasn't it, in there. So it comes from the Anglo-Norman flotte, to float. And the jetsam, if you know your French again, jeté, means to throw. So it is basically stuff that's either been thrown out of a boat and rejected as worthless to do with the wreckage that's

kind of found floating or washed up on the sea. But it's used figuratively to mean things that have been rejected or discarded, miscellaneous things. Is above board anything to do with the sea, ships? No, it started with gambling. So do you remember me saying that the board was a table originally, as in sideboard and as in a cupboard? So above board actually in gambling meant that you had your hands or your cards above the table rather than below. So you couldn't get up to any shenanigans. And I guess it became associated with nautical jargon, but it started definitely with gambling. And I think another one that people often associate with the Navy is the phrase under the weather. And the idea is that you would find the part of the ship below deck where actually you would be tossed about. You would actually be

kind of looking for the calmest place under the deck. And you were under the weather, you would be below the worst of the storm and, you know, possibly recovering from the seasickness that you were experiencing above. Somebody who worked on one of these big liners told me that when they have an emergency, they go to all the cabins and they always have to look in the cupboards because when the sea gets very tempestuous, passengers, I would go on board, I'd go up to be nearest the ships, you know, the rescue boats. But the passengers, apparently some of them, hide in their cupboards, in their cabins. Can you imagine? They feel safer there. Oh, shiver me timbers. Oh, shiver me timbers. That's a good one. That sounds like pirate talk. Shiver me timbers, yes. So the

timbers were obviously the wooden planks that held the ship together. And if they shivered, they would kind of split, because shiver can also mean to kind of splinter. So that is nautical in origin. Yes. What about Cut of One's Jib? The Cut of My Jib. Is that a nautical one? Yeah, the Cut of One's Jib goes back to the 19th century. And the jib is the triangular sail that stretches from the four-top mast i always think it's probably something like four-top mast to the jib boom and it was important because the nationality of a ship could be recognized by the cut and the number of these sails long before they came close enough for their flag to be recognised. So if an enemy ship came close and they saw the cut and the shape

and the design, the number, et cetera, of those triangular sails, they could be identified as enemies in time. So you might say, I don't like the cut of their jib. Oh, I love that. Are there any other everyday phrases that are made into mainstream English that have a kind of nautical origin? Well, there are so many out there. We talked about just how many navel and nautical idioms are within English. But listless is one that I like. I actually think listless is a rather beautiful word.

But it refers to a ship that sits in the water and there's no wind to make it list or to make the sea swell. So you literally are just a bit kind of immobilized um so i like that one plus you've got loose cannon you've got whelmed and underwhelmed and overwhelmed and to be whelmed just meant to be capsized and because we like to big things up we added under and over over first and then under so so the idea of being overwhelmed is to do with the ship, of capsizing in a ship. Yes. If you whelm, a ship that whelms is capsized. It's capsized.

And then I suppose if it overwhelms, it kind of, yeah, turns over possibly. And you threw in the loose cannon because these are cannons on board ships that if they're not tied down properly in a storm are loose and run hither and thither. Yes. No evidence at all to support they're cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass

monkey to do with cannons and cannonballs stacked in a pyramid. That seems to be a popular myth. So before anyone throws that one in, I think we have, unfortunately, because it's such a lovely story. You've heard that one, haven't you? That actually, when it gets really, really cold at sea, the cannonballs, the brass balls that are stacked in a pyramid contract so much that they kind of topple. But as I say, nothing, sadly, to support that. You've got no room to swing a cat. Now, again, popular myth will tell you that actually the cat in question is a cat of nine tails, the horrible tool of punishment. But the dates don't work for that.

So it's possible, but the dates don't really make it plausible. And unfortunately, they did used to treat, well, people still do, but they did used to treat animals incredibly cruelly. So it is quite possible that they would swing a cat by the tail. Horrible. So that's where that one may come from. I mean, we've talked about turning a blind eye, haven't we? And that brings us back to Nelson, I assume. That brings us right back to Nelson and his words to his flag captain

when he was told to surrender during the Battle of Copenhagen. You know, Foley, I have only one eye. I have a right to be blind sometimes. And he raises his telescope to his blind eye and says, I really don't see the signal. And of course it worked. And the whole nation very much admired the cut of his jib. Well, I think, look, we began with Nelson, given that this is our 111th episode and 111 in cricket is known as a Nelson. And we've ended up with Nelson and his blind eye. So I think that wraps up the sea for this week.

Did we ever, just to interrupt, did we ever talk about showing a leg and a son of a gun? Two of my favourite nautical idioms. Apologies to the regular purple people because they probably have heard this before, but I just think they're pretty amazing. So son of a gun was a child conceived on board a ship, perhaps beneath the gunwale,

and so perhaps of uncertain paternity when wives and lovers were allowed on board a ship, perhaps beneath the gunwale. And so perhaps of uncertain paternity when wives and lovers were allowed on board. And along the same theme, to show a leg is said to go back to the instruction in the morning to get all the sailors up and out. And whoever was in the cabin bed would show a leg. And if it was hairy, they were instructed to get out and get to work, whereas wives and partners could snooze on. I love the way you've kept the best to last. You know so much and you just throw that in as a little bagatelle at the end of our nautical life on the ocean wave.

Thank you, Susie Dent. You're brilliant. Well, there are so many more. And if there are particular ones you want to ask about, please get in touch. Purple people, you just Susie Dent. You're brilliant. Well, there are so many more. And if there are particular ones you want to ask about, please get in touch. Purple people, you just contact us here. It's purple at something else dot com. Who has been in touch with us this week, Susie?

My goodness, we've had lots and lots of emails. So thank you to everybody who sent them in. Do you remember we talked in a recent episode about rediscovering an item that you thought you'd lost and the joy therein. And I think the word that I came up with was retrouvaille. I think it was Lucy George who wrote to tell us that she'd found something in her sewing cupboard that she'd previously thought was lost. So retrouvaille, strictly speaking in French, is the joy of reunion. But I think we

wanted something a little bit more specific and something that covered an object. Well, as always, our fab listeners have come to the rescue. So Daniel Teague from Essex proposes Discoverted, which is a combination of discovered and coveted. Discoverted. And Lucia in New York City has a couple of suggestions too. She says, how about re-memento, which is lovely, or, this is very clever, souvenir. Instead of souvenir, which means memory, is survenir, because it has resurfaced, it has come to the top.

Very clever, aren't they? Very ingenious. Well done, Lucia, or is it Lucia? It could be Lucia, of course. Whatever it is. If you want to communicate, purple at somethingelse.com will find us something without a G. A letter here from Amy Llewellyn. Hi, Susie and Giles. I've only recently discovered your podcast, which in many ways is

wonderful as I can immerse myself in binge listening. Oh, that's generous. Yes. Look, 110 previous episodes to get stuck into. She writes, as a speech and language therapist, my job is about words and about helping children to be successful in their use of words in the minefield that is communication. As I'm binge listening and playing catch up with the podcast, you'll have to forgive me if you've covered my word requests in an episode I've not come to yet. I'd like to know a bit more about these words. Codswallop and tosh. Codswallop and tosh.

Well, can we help her? Okay, so tosh, no one knows where that comes from. My suspicion is it might come from Romany, but the dictionary will just tell you origin unknown. There's a great colourful story attached to Codswallop, which again is one of those big etymological mysteries. The dictionaries will say it's possible, but they won't come off the fence on this one because again, we are still trying to match up the dates and the records. But if you'll allow all those disclaimers, there was a man

called Hiram Codd and he produced one of the first glass bottles with a stopper you can still get them today that allowed you to keep a fizzy drink fizzy and he produced what is supposedly called or was called Codd's Wallop. Wallop being a dialect term for weak beer so he produced these drinks. I don't know if weak beer was supposed to be slightly effervescent, but anyway, Codswallop was supposed to be Cod's version, Cod's brand of cheap beer. And because it was quite cheap and nothing on the real stuff, Codswallop became a byword for stuff and nonsense. Very good. I love it. No Codswallop in that. No Tosh either. Any more? Well, stop press. I don't know if you've been watching Line of Duty, whether you were addicted like the rest of the UK. Fantastic, fantastic series written by Jed Mercurio.

Anyway, we've all been totally obsessed with this over here. And we had an email from Liz Meacham, who picked up on one word that's used all the time for the main boss in Line of Duty and that's the gaffer. Very British word it seems to me and indeed it does go back, Liz was wondering where it came from, it goes back to a very old word, 16th century, for godfather. So it's gaffer is supposed to be a little shortening of godfather and there was one gamma, It's supposed to be a little shortening of Godfather. And there was one, Gamma, G-A-M-M-E-R, for Godmother as well. So quite how, I suppose Godfather maybe was used figuratively, much might be used in the Mafia, for someone who is, you know, above everyone else,

or at least is prized or special in some way. And then eventually it became used for the boss. That's very ingenious and interesting. Chief electrician in a TV or film production, of course. So a gaffer is a godfather originally, and a gammer was a godmother. Was a godmother. Are you a godparent? I am. Twice over. Three times over, in fact. Exactly. It's always difficult to remember. Are you a good godmother? I think I was reasonably good until they grew a little bit older, and then I seemed to have become not very good. How about you? I'm hopeless.

I've got so many godchildren. I mean, it's extraordinary. And I should do what the great playwright Sir Noel Coward would do, because he had a lot of godchildren, and I should send them a card on my birthday, because at least I could remember that. Good. What three words have you got to introduce us to this week?

Okay, I'm going to start with a slightly playful blend. It's not a new one, but it's from, I suppose, 20th century New York slang. And, you know, when people were made to smoke outside, when smoking was no longer allowed indoors, which actually might make it early 21st century. I can't remember when that happened. But you will often see people outside buildings, obviously, having their cigarettes or vaping or whatever they're doing. And so people created the word smirching, which is a blend of smoking and flirting. So you'll be having a chat with someone else. You might have met someone else out on your smoking forays and you might be smirting away. like smirting that's good i've been watching the

past year or so i've been watching a lot of old movies oh yeah from the 30s 40s 50s and in every scene everyone is smoking and old television programs from the 1950s people taking part in panel games people doing i know they're all sitting there smoking. I'm making my way through the crown and I just feel so sorry for actors like Helena Bonham Carter or, you know, all the others actually, because it's just constant smoking. It actually makes, now it makes me feel quite sick watching it. It's very strange, isn't it? The way that we've changed. Anyway, this one is for drinkers. It doesn't include you, Giles. I just like the sound of this one is nipitatum and a nipitatum is an especially strong drink so we might if we're sort of in shock or

just in need at the end of a day you might want a nipitatum or two i like that i need a nipitatum just to give lift the spirits oh yes and speaking, this is, I just love the sounds of these. This was old English dialect for the three draughts that you could pour from a keg or a jug of beer. So I'm sticking with alcohol for this one. And it's the necum, the swincum and the swancum. And then you syncum, obviously. But necum, swincum, swancum. I love it. Necum, swincumancom i love it necum swincom swancom how do you spell those n-e-c-u-m s-w-i-n-k-u-m and swancom in fact yeah what am i talking about necum should come last it should be swincom swancom necum but it's not the necum is the

first the swincom is the second and the swancom is the third but the vessel with the pestle is the brew that is true that's true in my book And that leads me to my verse, because next week, I know, we've already planned our next week. We're going to talk about, as you mentioned, those impossible things that don't seem to make any sense in the English language and why they don't make sense. And the ones we think don't make sense, some of them do. And that reminded me of the impossibility of really getting on top of plurals when it comes to the English language. We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes. But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes. Then one fowl is a goose, but two are called geese. Yet the plural of mouse should never be meese. You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice. Yet the plural of house is houses, not heists. It's all incomprehensible, isn't it?

It is. Except some of it does have rules connected with it. And those are some of the things we're going to explore next time. We are. In the meantime, though, thank you so much for listening, as always. Please do get in touch. Purple at somethingelse.com. Something Rides With Purple

is a Something Else production. It was produced by Lawrence Bassett with additional production from Harriet Wells, Steve Ackerman, Ella McLeod, Jay Beale, and... I've got a question for this fellow. Gunny, tell me, if the plural of man is always called men, why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen? Come on, Gully, give us the answer.

Gully?