Something Rhymes with Purple - Testiculos habet et bene pendentes

Episode Date: January 12, 2021

Take a seat, recline if you’d like or perhaps, even lie down because this week Susie and Gyles are going to be exploring the wonderful wordy world of furniture. Do you know your Chaise Lounge from your Divan? The Chesterfield from the Sedan? Get ready to be paraded around on a litter and discover why the secretaire is full of secrets, why bankruptcy ended in smashed benches and how a day-to-day bodily function named one of our most trusted household items… A Somethin’ Else production If you have any wordy wonderings or linguistical lamentations you’d like to ask to Susie and Gyles, you can get in touch by emailing [e-mail] Susie’s Trio: - Testiculating - talk bollocks while waving your hands around - Groaking - Stare longingly at someone else’s food. - Cover-slut - item of clothing to hide any unsightly blemishes. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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With opening moves, you simply choose a question to be automatically sent to your matches. Then sit back and let your matches start the chat. Download Bumble and try it for yourself. Something else. Download Bumble and try it for yourself. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin. This is Giles Brandreth, welcoming you to another episode of Something Rhymes with Purple.

This is a podcast for people who love language, and it's hosted by me and my good friend, the world's leading lexicographer, Susie Dent. Hello, Susie. That's not true, but I am a lexicographer. You certainly are the world's leading lexicographer. Do that ring any bells, that phrase, are you sitting comfortably, then I'll begin? Yes. Now, do you know why? Can you remember why? You're not really old enough. Is it Jackanory or Andy Pandy or something similar? It's that generation. It is. It's the words that were used to introduce, first of all, listen with mother on the radio or the wireless, as some people used to call it. And then I think

even to introduce watch with mother on television, which is where Andy Pandy did appear. Andy Pandy, I think, was on a Monday. Oh, I love it. One of my earliest memories, Andy Pandy. Andy Pandy's coming to play. Tra-la-la-la-la-la. Andy Pandy's here to stay. Imagine the merchandise that we'd have now for Andy Pandy

that we just didn't have in those days. Well, I know, I did have Andy Pandy. I had an Andy Pandy doll. An Andy Pandy doll had an Andy Pandy puppet. And of course,

Andy Pandy had Looby Lou. Andy Pandy lived in a basket with Looby Lou. And here we go, Looby Lou. And also Ted. Here weandy had Looby Lou. Andy Pandy lived in a basket with Looby Lou. And here we go, Looby Lou. And also Teddy. Here we go, Looby Lou. Oh, that's a different song. That's a different song, but they sang them together. And Teddy was there as well. And I think they were on Monday. I'm trying to remember who was on Tuesday. Wednesday, I know, I'm almost certain, was Bill and Ben, Flap-Bot-Men, Bill and Ben, with Little Weed. Little Weed. Yes. Do you remember Little Weed? bin, flop on bin, bin, bin, bin, with little weed, little weed. Do you remember little weed? Yes.

Yes. I do. This is all bringing back memories. Anyway. Do you remember Crystal Tips and Alistair? No. Well, Crystal Tips and Alistair. No, I don't remember Crystal Tips and Alistair.

Who were they? All right. One day we'll do an ep on... Children's characters. Children's programmes. TV programmes. And also maybe the language of childhood, those first words. Why do we begin by saying da-da, mum- mama, I suppose is the sound, the way they sound. But what I want to talk about today, are you sitting comfortably, was actually what we sit upon, how we sit upon.

You know, the sit-uponing, sitting, and the things we sit on. Also, we may have time to get into, is it right to say I was sat? Because that does irritate me, but you've told me before that it dates back to Shakespeare. I have my doubts about that. Anyway. Not quite. Did I say Shakespeare? But it's very, very old and it's still very current in dialect and unfortunately in schools up and down the land. But yes, you're right. But sitting, do you know what? Honestly, Giles, sitting is everywhere in English. And you say sit upon. Do you remember that was a euphemism for trousers when in the Victorian times you couldn't say trousers. So you said sit upon, round me houses, unmentionables, inexpressibles.

I love that. Sit upon was one of them. So the word sit, just to begin with, sit and sitting, just give us the origin of those words, to sit. Okay. So it's Germanic. We owe our Germanic ancestors for that. It's a sibling of the German sitzen, to sit.

I thought those were spots. Zitz they not or is that a different word altogether no this zitsen is with an s-i-t-z-e-n whereas zit is z-i-t okay we'll come to that when we do it now you've got me wondering where zit comes i have to look that up it might be to do with speed like zip is to do with speed and onomatopoeic i hate to think what's it might be anyway look it up later sit sit so sitzen in german is also related if you go back far enough to the latin sedere meaning to sit and that has given us so many different words in english from sedentary to assiduous which meant to sit at your desk with dedication, preside, president, sedan, reside, saddle, session, seance, sedate, calm and rested, subside, to sit or settle down. Oh, so many. So

sitting is actually just everywhere in English. So it seems we are a fairly sedentary lot by nature. Well, take us then through some of our seating arrangements, the things that we sit on and where we get the words from them. When you watch TV, are you sitting in a chair, on a sofa? Personally, this is all about sort of habits and less about sitting, but I don't actually sit and turn on the TV and think what's on. I tend to just sort of sit and curl up with a device and watch on demand. So I could be in bed quite often when I'm watching something, sitting up in bed. Bed simply goes back to the Germanic bet. So that one's quite simple. Oh, how about you? I don't see you as a sofa person, really. I do have a sofa. I do sit on the sofa. We've got at home a sofa that we bought. It was so expensive.

We bought it at Harrods many years ago. It was so expensive that as a result of buying this sofa, we were given a black Harrods card, a black credit card. Yes. Among other things, literally, they would close the department for you. Yes. If you flash flash your black card, they would give you, I'm not exaggerating, champagne when you came. This is like a Nando's black card, but so much better. And did you know that there was a car park underneath Harrods? And this black card gives you access to this car park. So this amazing black card I had from Harrods that enabled me to have all these wonderful things, because I bought this super, super duper expensive sofa. Well, it's been a disaster.

It's so super duper. It was Italian in make. It's very swish and it swivels about and you've got buttons to press. So my wife can sit at one end and I sit at the other and the legs go up, the cushions come down. It warms you. It can do everything.

It warms you. Honestly, I live for electric, not electric chairs, but chairs that can warm you up. But from day one, it's gone wrong. So when I press to go up, she goes down. You're just bringing the soup to your mouth. Maybe she's made the settings right. That's a life of its own. If we foolishly are eating food, which you should never do in front of the telly,

it spills all over you. The thing is jerking us to and fro. It snaps up. You get your legs caught in it. It's a nightmare. We've sent it back. We can't send it back. It's too heavy to send back. They've sent out engineers, but we've now just given up on it. So to get onto this sofa now, we have to actually assume a sedentary position because it's like a double bed. The legs are stuck out into the slightly elevated. It is a disaster of a sofa. But tell me. I'm not sure how many people are going to be sympathizing with your problems with your Tesla and your Harrods sofa, if I'm honest. I may. I may put on Twitter a photograph of this sofa so that people can actually see what it looks like. But the point is, it's a sofa.

Sofa, not so good. Where does the word sofa come from? I love that. Sofa is actually Arabic in origin. So it's a simple borrowing and, you know, originally probably seen as being something quite exotic. So, you know, just like sort of syrup and sugar and various things that came over from Arabic. So it started off as an Arabic word and then eventually came to describe a couch or a divan or a settee. We've got lots of different words for them, haven't we? Couches became fashionable in the 17th century and their name comes from the old French coucher, meaning to lie down, which is obviously what you do on your sofa. And the divan originally, now that applied to a privy council who got to sleep, well, pretty much on what used to be that sofa, because it was really part of

the floor that was padded with carpets and pillows. So these are all in the days where they were called by the Arabic sofa before they, you know, became naturalised as sofas. And yeah, so the divan was the privy council who got to sit in that kind of special space. And then divan came over into English, and Jane Austen might have referred to the couch as a settee. A settee now very much kind of for anyone who knows British English will know that there's always this kind of divide between calling the sitting room the lounge, or indeed the sitting room, or a sofa, the sofa or the settee. For some reason, they've got all these class associations. But the settee was once a very almost kind of

aristocratic thing. It was the place in which you settled down for a long discussion or chat. So they've all got these kind of slightly different wealth associations with them, I think. But ultimately, they all mean the same thing. But they're physically often quite different. We'll come on to things like... Oh, okay. So I've never had a divan. Well, a divan, I think, is a little bit like a chaise longue. We'll come to a chaise longue in a moment. But before we leave divan, I go to a restaurant in the Strand called Simpsons in the Strand. It's one of London's oldest restaurants. It's next door to the Savoy Hotel. I go there because I'm a columnist,

a diarist for a magazine called The Oldie, which is a fun magazine, and that's where we host the Oldie of the Year awards. Anyway, if you go to this restaurant, it's famous for serving old English food, you know, roast beef, Yorkshire pudding, all the trimmings. But in the Victorian times, it was known as Simpsons in the Strand, the home of the Grand Divan. D-I-V-A-N. That's where chess games were played in London. And some of the great chess players of the Victorian era played in this grand divan. So I wondered if it was a room in which there were lots of low-slung

couches, like Cheslong, where at one end, there's something you can sit up against, but the other end, there's nothing, so that you lie on it, and maybe the chess tables were put in between. Is there an actual description anywhere of what a divan is as opposed to a sofa? A sofa I think of as having soft cushions and arms at either end. At both ends. I think a divan only has an arm at one end. Can you elucidate? I am going to look it up because I'm not a furniture expert in the Oxford English Dictionary as I always would. So originally, as I say, an oriental council of state, it says the Privy Council, presided over by the Sultan. Then the hall where the Turkish Divan is held. And a long seat then in the 1700s consisting of a continued step,

bench or raised part of the floor against the wall of a room, which may be furnished with cushions so as to form a kind of sofa or couch. And you're absolutely right. Nowadays, it's a low bed or couch with no back or end. But that was the idea because you were against the wall. Hence, it wasn't a kind of custom-made piece of furniture. Very good. What about an Ottoman? That, I suppose, dates to the Ottoman Empire. Yes, absolutely. And this is what I also imagine you want. So, that is named after the Ottoman Empire, as you say, and that lasted for centuries, from the 13th century onwards. There's a kind of padded upholstered seat, which has no back or

arms, an Ottoman, and it was brought to Europe from the Ottoman Empire in the 18th century. And early versions apparently were flat and quite long but eventually they became kind of round and the shape that we know today do you have any ottomans i do have an ottoman i also have a chesterfield and a knoll do you know the origin of the chesterfield no okay i'm looking this one up as well chesterfield originally was a kind of overcoat, like a Macintosh. And then from 1900s, a stuffed over couch or sofa with a back and two ends, one of which is sometimes made adjustable. So what's the difference between a Chesterfield and a sofa? Well, maybe it's the adjustability. Or I thought it was probably the make of it. Or maybe it came from a stately home where Lord Chesterfield lived. Yes, I'm looking at it. They are absolutely beautiful.

Well, it was named after the Earl of Chesterfield. So that's in the 19th century. They're very elegant, aren't they? What's your favourite chair? Do you have a favourite chair to sit in? Yes, I have a love seat. Do you know what a love seat is? They're sort of like just very cosy armchairs, but the seating part is much, much longer. So you can just pull

your legs up and just basically sit with your legs to your side and read a book by the fire. So they're much deeper chairs and absolutely beautiful. Don't know why they're called love seats. I haven't gone that far. Oh, I thought you were going to be the world expert on this. My recollection of a love seat is that it's where a couple can sit side by side, but they're facing in different directions and there's a little barrier between them. So it's shaped like an S. Okay. I think it might have slightly changed in meaning now because it's wider than an armchair and it's narrower than a standard sofa. So it's something you can definitely kind of cuddle up on, but yeah, maybe they can snugly fit two people. And if

you're kind of proportioned, you know, in the right way, but I'm definitely talking about a single one in my house. Okay. Shall I tell you about the Bureau? Do it. Oh, have we finished all the chairs? Have you done the Windsor chair? Have you done the director's chair? Oh, the Windsor chair. Do you have a Windsor chair? No, I don't have a Windsor chair. Tell me about the Windsor chair. I think Windsor chair is very popular in North America, but obviously has got royal associations from here.

Really simple design with back and sides consisting of spindles, almost, attached to a solid sculpted seat. And they have apparently been handcrafted since the 16th century, particularly in Wales. But they didn't become stylish until the 16th century, particularly in Wales. But they didn't become stylish until the 18th century. And Windsor, because it was named after the English town of Windsor, home of Windsor Castle, one of the official residences of the British royal family. And there's a lovely story attached to it. I don't know how true this is, but legend has it

that King George I was once caught in a storm and found shelter in a cottage. And there he was offered a really simple spindled chair, you know, the ones with the sort of bars at the back, really. And he had never experienced anything like this at all. They certainly didn't have anything like this in court. And he was so impressed, he asked his furniture makers to copy the chairs for the Windsor Castle. And, you know, with sort of colonial America, it became almost the most popular piece of furniture. So still very, very popular there. I don't have a Windsor chair, but as I say, I do have a Knoll sofa. And since you don't know, I will share what I do know about it. It goes back certainly 300 years.

it. It goes back certainly 300 years. The original Knoll sofa I've actually seen at Knoll House, which is in Kent, K-N-O-L-E. And it was a home of Vita Sackville-West for a while. So Vita Sackville-West sat on that sofa and Virginia Woolf, her friend and briefly her lover, sat on that sofa as well. And the one we've got, it's incredibly comfortable, and the arms come down at either end. And I know that there's a famous photograph of Laurence Olivier and Vivian Leigh sitting on their Knoll sofa. They're very handsome pieces. And I think that's perhaps what your home lacks, a Knoll sofa. Okay, we can put that on our New Year's resolution list then. How about desks? Do you work at a desk? I do work at a desk. Sometimes I stand up at it, sometimes I sit at it. I work at both a table and at a desk. What is the origin of desk as a word?

Desk itself, that's a really interesting one because I was thinking there are so many different words for, you know, whether we've got bureaus or secretaires. I think maybe I've got the wrong idea of your house, Giles, but I imagine that you have all of these. Desk itself goes back to Latin, which I'm just checking for you as to when it came into English, Oxford English Dictionary. Originally, it was an article of furniture for a library study or church. And in medieval Latin, a desca meant exactly that, really. Ultimately, it goes back to discus, which was used not just for a disc or discus in Roman times, but also a table. So, you know, for quite a long time, a table, which came to us from the French table, it actually was called a board, which will explain why we have a cupboard. We've lost the etymology of that because of our pronunciation, but of course it was originally

a cup board. It was a table on which cups and general vessels were kept. And that's why we talk about board and lodging. The board was originally food. It became a metonym, should we say, for the food that was served on that board or table. Do you sit at a desk? Do you stand at a desk? I am sitting at a desk now. I need to get a better chair because I've got a rubbish chair. Much as I like IKEA, and we should talk about the origins of the IKEA name, I've got a chair that's just no good for my back.

So I need to get one of those ones where you're just kind of permanently trying to keep your balance because apparently it's very good for your core. Yes. Well, I've taken to standing up at the desk because, well, do you remember last summer I began having headaches and I thought, oh, I'm having, it's long COVID. It's got to me at last. My wife is still laughing. Anyway, it turned out, I think that I was sitting by the screen with my neck pushed forward, looking at the screen, squinting my eyes, looking at the screen, sitting awkwardly. And so I stopped doing that. I started standing up at the desk. And then I got myself an amusing thing. Oh, next week, I might bring it so you can see it. A kind of brace thing, a device that you put on to make your shoulders go back.

Oh, I think I've seen those. They sort of put on this, are you like this? And they make you look like a hunchback. That's it. Absolutely. It's a kind of harness. You put on this harness. Well, it does work if you can be bothered to put it on. It does work.

So I stand up at the desk, I sit at the desk. But a desk for me, there are different types of desks. There are partner's desks, aren't they? And they have, do you know what a partner's desk is? I don't think so. No, I'm imagining one of those school desks where you lift up the lid. Oh, I loved those. It was a bit like a bureau. There was a little inkwell in the corner. I loved an inkwell in the corner and a little place for putting your pencils and your pens at the top. And you could open it up and make a terrible noise as you banged the lid down. i loved that yes absolutely that's a traditional

desk a partner okay what's a partner desk well a partner's desk tends to be two desks that go back to back they have knee holes where you put your knees and either side down the side they have drawers for all your paperwork and they can either be flat on top or they can have a slope. Anyway, they face one another. And as it were, for people who were partners in, originally, you know, firms of solicitors or accountants, the partners, the senior partners sat face to face at their partners' desks. Oh, okay.

I don't know about partners. I can tell you about the Bureau and the Secretariat. Please do. It says Bureau actually were desks used in offices, which is why offices eventually took on the name of the desk and became known as bureaus. And they were places to write letters and store paper and ink, etc. The name, we think, probably came from an old French word, burelle, which meant dark brown cloth, because that was traditionally used to cover the writing desks. And furniture makers began to add extra drawers and things. And by the 18th century, it could have deep drawers then topped with a desk. And it was also called a secritaire, which some houses still have secretaires, which goes back to the Latin

secretarius. And if you remember, Giles, this is one of my favourite hidden etymologies, because a secretarius was a scribe or clerk entrusted with secrets. If we pronounced it differently, a secretarius, we would probably get that idea of confidential information. And the secretaires or the secretaria, they kept things in bureaus that had often a drop-down lid and they acquired drawers and things and they too were kept for confidential information. drawers and things, and they too were kept for confidential information. And by extension, the women employed to write at these desks, which became known as kind of ladies' desks, because they were quite elegant. And it was thought, of course, that women had more secrets.

They became known as secretaries. Ah, very good. There you go. I like all that. I'm thinking back to the partner's desk and that lovely cubbyhole that there was, that there is. Oh, yeah. And how my mother was a Montessori nursery school teacher. And she had a lot of Montessori equipment, including a huge wooden box, like a crate, which had a hole in one side. And the children loved climbing into this hole and sitting in there.

And I've discovered that grandchildren love being in this knee hole in the partner's desk. It's like a little cubby hole. It's a little safe place to be. Oh, I like that idea. Sometimes when I'm writing a book, it's going really badly. I get off the chair

and I climb into the little cubby hole myself and suck my thumb. Oh, I'm so gullible. I kind of believe that. I was just looking up the etymology of cubbyhole and unfortunately it hasn't got a certain history, but it has relatives in things like the low German gubbung, which meant a lean-to or a shed for cattle. So originally it was a kind of small coop or hutch and then any kind of small receptacle and then eventually something which was, you know, very small where you might letibulate. Do you remember letibulating is hiding in a corner. Look, there are lots of furniture words

that are hidden inside other words, aren't there? Should we take a break and then you can reveal some of those to us? Perfect. Wherever you're going, you better believe American Express will be right there with you. Heading for adventure? We'll help you breeze through security. Meeting friends a world away? You can use your travel credit.

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powerful backing of American Express. Visit amex.ca slash yamx. Benefits vary by card. Terms apply. Go back to school with Rogers and get Canada's fastest and most reliable internet. Perfect for streaming lectures all day or binging TV shows all night. Save up to $20 per month on Rogers Internet. Visit rogers.com for details. We got you, Rogers. This is Something Rhymes with Purple. We're talking furniture. It's a funny subject to be talking about. We've touched on IKEA before, haven't we? Because I think you told me what the origin was, but I can't remember. It's a famous brand name. Very famous. It goes back to Ingvar Kamprad, who began his business career by selling wooden matches. He rode his bike from farm to farm and sold matches. And then he was

seen peddling around selling Christmas ornaments and ballpoint pens, even fish. And before long, he began to sell the furniture of local artisans. And that was how it all started. So if you take the initials of Ingvar Kamprad, you could have the I and K. And then his family farm was called Elmtharud. Sorry about my pronunciation. And the village of his birth was Agunarid. And then you've got initialism, Ikea. We've created about 100 episodes of Something Reminds of Purple. And we did a whole episode devoted to brands. K-log, is that what we called it? Anyway, we did do an episode on brands so you can dig it up in the past. But you were telling me that there are words that have furniture hidden in them. Explain that. Yes. I think one of the best known,

and we may have covered it in our money episode, is bankrupt. Because the bank in a bankrupt was once a bench. And these were moneylenders' benches. So you would find them in the streets of medieval Britain. You would sometimes find them with gory meat, raw flesh and things that the butchers were selling on the streets. And these tables became known as shambles, which is where we get the idea of a bloody mess from today. bank was a table essentially and when a money lender went out of business either metaphorically or physically the bench would be smashed or broken to indicate that he was no longer operating and bankrupt goes back to the Italian banker rotter broken bench which is quite cool I think kids tend to like that one or maybe they like the idea of shambles, just because it's always applied to their rooms. Litter is another one. Can you guess what word might be behind litter? Litter. Well, I do know, having a love of carry-on films, one of my favourites is the one set in the French Revolution, where Kenneth Williams, I think, plays Le Grand Fromage, the big cheese. And I think he's brought on in a litter.

It's a kind of like a sedan chair. Why is it called a sedan chair? You can tell me that because it comes from sedan, I suppose. You sit in a box. No, it comes from sedere, to sit. So it simply goes back to that Latin word. So it's a chair, a sedan chair. You're sitting, well, it's actually tautological, isn't it?

It's two words. Lying on it, really. Yeah. So you're sitting in a chair and a sedan chair. You're sitting, well, it's actually tautological, isn't it? It's two words. Lying on it, really. Yeah. So you're sitting in a chair and you're carried in. And that was sometimes called a litter. The Pope, when he's crowned and comes into St. Peter's Square, he is carried on a litter, isn't he? Yes.

Guys with big, big biceps have carrying him. And his chair is on top of a platform which is carried along that is a litter yeah think of your french here because it goes back to the french meaning a bed and it's actually a fairly sad story in that it looks back to people who couldn't afford proper beds so would make them out of straw, paper, whatever they had handy. And that would be then discarded the following day because it would be considered soiled, which is where we get the idea of litter being rubbish. But ultimately, it goes back to that idea of a bed. And when we talk about a litter of puppies, it is the idea,

again, of sort of lying down and just you know, and just sort of curling up, I suppose, and then giving birth from that point of view. But it's all to do with lying down on beds. So you're lying down on a bed, and when you were brought in on a litter, it meant you were like a kind of Roman emperor. You'd be lying back on your bed, and the bed would be carried into the room. And the litter on which the Pope sat or was carried in once he'd become Pope, the reason that I'm conscious of it is I do remember there was controversy hundreds of years ago when they thought they'd elected somebody who turned out to be a woman, Pope Joan. Do you know about this? Wow.

There was briefly a Pope called Pope Joan, and she was female, but she was actually elected pope. So she must have been a cardinal, and they made her pope. They didn't want this to happen again. And so what they did, whenever a new pope was elected, and we're going back to pre-medieval times, they would put the pope on the litter in his papal robes, and they would carry him in so he was, as it were, above, he was being held up. And there would be a hole cut in the bottom of the litter. And the cardinals would walk underneath

the papal litter and gaze upward at the pope's nether regions to make sure that it wasn't a woman, that it was a man. And as they would go under, they would say, they would stop, they would gaze up, and they would say, in Latin, of course, testiculus habit et bene pendentes. Oh, my goodness. He's got them and they're hanging nicely. And then they would walk on. And that's how they would know that the Pope was a bloke. And it was all thanks to the papal litter with a hole cut through the middle of it. What an extraordinary story. Anyway, that's the joy of language. It takes you to places that one would not think of.

You told me once that parasite had something to do with furniture, and I can't think how, except... Well, in a sort of slightly extended sense, because parasite goes back to the Greek for sitting beside. So the idea was that a parasite was originally a smell feast. I don't know if you remember what a smell feast is, but it's somebody who always manages to turn up whenever they smell good food. So a smell feast is the friend that just never fails to show up when you're cooking. And a parasite was vaguely similar. They would pinch your food. That was the original meaning. So they would sit next to you and pinch your food, thus they were kind of preying on your hospitality. And if you remember, there are so many connections with food, whether it's a mate who was someone with whom you ate your meat, because

the two are very close siblings, mate and meat, companion, somebody with whom you broke your bread, et cetera. So, parasite, again, the idea of sitting and eating, but in this case, pinching from somebody else's plate. If people have got questions about furniture and the origins of the names of bits and pieces around their house, do get in touch with us. I'd like to know about two before we move on. One is bric-a-brac and the other is pouf. Are they both French? Bric-a-brac means bits and pieces. My bits and pieces. Yes. My bric-a-brac. Bric-a-brac follows the rules of something called ablaut reduplication. Remember this? Yeah, I do. Which is how we unconsciously know that it's not going to be

bric-a-brac. Likewise, bells will never go dong-ding, we will never sit on a saucy, we will never eat a cat kit, and so on and so on. And French, it comes from the French abric et abrac, randomly or willy-nilly. So one of those has been kind of added on for the sort of rhyming element. I'm not sure whether it's bric or brac, French speakers who are listening in will be able to tell us. But yeah, it's millennia of small objects and ornaments. They're sort of tranquilments, aren't they? Which is another word for bric or brac. It's kind of knickknacks.

What? Tranquilments? A knickknack is yet another word. Tranquil? Tranquilments. I've never heard of tranquilments. What's that? Oh, yes. Tranquilments are simply tramporee finery.

So sort of little ornaments. Oh, there's so many words for them. Googles. Two jaws. You don't call of little ornaments. Oh, there's so many words for them. Googles. Jewjaws. You don't call them Googles. Oh, sorry. I've never had to use it ever. Well, there you are.

I'm sure it's Jewjaws, not Googles. I'm sure you're right. How do you spell it? G-E-W-G-A-W. Well, maybe you're right. I've always said Jewjaws. No, I'm going to look it up now. But Googles will do.

So knick-knack was... Knick-knack, batty wanker. Give a dog a bone. This, I'm going to look it up now. But goo-goos will do. So knick-knack was... Knick-knack, batty-wanker, give a dog a bone. This old man is going home. It was originally a petty trick or a sleight of hand before it became a light dainty article of furniture. I'm going to look up jujore because I've never in my life had to use it. I've just had it in my head. It's a bit like hyperbole and oxymoron, which is how I used to read hyperbole and oxymorons. Okay. Google, I was right. Just because the dictionary says Google doesn't mean to say you were right. So isn't it funny? You've probably not ever used it either, have you?

No, I have been using it. I've been using it incorrectly. And people somehow assume that I know it. So I've probably told a lot of people it's jujol and it's Google. It's Google. So out there, I've misinformed you. It's Google from now on in. No more jujol. I don't suppose you've done that very often. Should I give you one more word that has furniture hidden behind it? And that's the canapé that if you are lucky enough to go to a party these days, well, we won't be at the moment, but hopefully very soon, you might be offered a canapé. And actually that is related to canopy. And a canopy was originally a mosquito net that was put over a bed in hot countries. It goes back to the Greek konops, meaning a mosquito. And eventually the mosquito idea was transferred from the net to

the bed and a canopy became a bed. And the idea of the canapes that you have at a party is that they are tiny little, you know, the pieces of toast or whatever it is, the little blinis that you have little toppings on. They're like little beds or little sofas that people put things on top of. Is the pouf related to puff, as in puff pastry? Is it all plumped up? I think it is. A pouf is slightly puffed up, isn't it? It's a bit like an ottoman. It's a stool. Yes, it says, origin uncertain, probably a transferred sense of puff, the action of puffing and so being a bit blown up.

It's actually related, we think, to a later version of the word, meaning an elaborate female headdress fashionable in the 18th century, or a high roll of hair worn by women. So I think the idea is always kind of something inflated. I love this. I love playing with words. I'm just thinking about stool and all the various... Why is the stool that you sit on called a stool? And why is, as it were, when you've opened your bowels, the result also called a stool? Yes, well, again, I think it's that kind of shift. So it was Germanic, it goes back to a Saxon word, Stoll, which is probably related to the idea of a throne or a seat. It was a church pew for quite a long time. It was a seat for an offender, of course. We had the cucking stools during the

horrible kind of witch persecutions. I'm just looking to see where it was. The cucking stools, did you say? Yes. I thought they were ducking stools. They were cucking stools as well. So to cuck, it's related to cack. So it was actually to relieve your bowels, as you say. Oh my goodness. So I think that is why the result of opening your bowels then came to be

called a stool as well. How interesting. So it all goes back to the seat that you once sat on. We're back where we began. We're back seated where we began. And just finally remind me, I'm wrong to get uppity when people say I was sat as opposed to I was sitting or I was seated. Well, no, you're not wrong to get uppity because it's important to be passionate about language and I totally understand how it will actually get on people's nerves. But, you know, it has been around in dialect for a very, very long time using that past participle rather than the imperfect tense sitting. Strictly speaking, if you want to use standard English and not annoy your reader or listener, you should probably say I was sitting,

but I'm afraid a bit like mischievous, it might be a lost cause. Good. Have we had any queries from people? Because if you have got questions you want to ask, we're certainly happy to give them a go. Please be in touch with us. It's purple at something else.com. Recommend us too. We like that. We need the purple people. Empower to grow. Have people been in touch this week? They have. We had a nice email from Chris Lewis, inspired by the word onomatopoeia. And do you remember the song? N-O-N-O-M-A-T-O-P-O-E-I-A. Love it. So Chris has sent us these alternative definitions. Onomatopoeia. What an incontinent Italian cat does.

Onomatopoeia. Oh, I love it. Onomatopoeia. I love it. Or what an Italian magician's cat does. Onomatopoeia. Trying to get that one. An Italian magician's cat doesn't.

Onomat. Oh. Oh. Onomatopoeia. Brilliant. Brilliant. one an italian magician's cat doesn't know oh on a mat appear brilliant brilliant that is very very good and then we've got a nice email from laura o'connor who asks if there's a link between tidings tidy and tide so they sound so similar but their meanings seem very different brilliant question they are all related because the noun tide originally meant time. And that then percolates through all the other meanings. So time, that sense survives in the names of times of the year, like Yuletide, which we've just had, or Whitsuntide. And tidy originally meant timely or seasonable, in season. And it took that meaning of being timely to be kind of appropriate or fit

for purpose. And it's from there that it developed the modern sense of good looking or in good order and neat. But it all goes back to that idea of being timely and on time. And then tide, again, the time element is there because that became associated with the times of high and low water at particular places along the coast. And finally, tidings. They were originally events that took place at a certain time. So they were new. So we talk about good tidings, of course, at Christmas time. But the original was we have news of events that happened at a particular time. So as I say, the common leitmotif or theme throughout all of those is time. Very good. I like it. Any more? That's it for today, I think, but we've got my trio. Oh, I want, Susie, we want three new words from you. What are your three next words this week?

Well, do you know what? Our discussion has actually prompted me to revisit at least two that I may have mentioned before, but I hope you'll forgive me because you were talking about the Pope's testicles. And that reminded me, of course, of testiculating, which is a modern blend. You won't find that in the dictionary yet. But to testiculate is to talk bollocks whilst waving your hands around, which I think is quite good. And we talked about parasites as well. And I think rather than pinching the food of someone next to you, you can just stare in envy and hopefully that might give you some. And that's groking. Do you remember groking? It's to basically stare longingly at someone else's food.

Lovely. This happens to me all the time. In the days when I used to go to a restaurant, so long since I've been to one, I've almost forgotten what to do. I never know what to order. I always order at the last minute. I always regret what I've ordered. The moment the food arrives, I always want what the person next door to me has got. And often I'm with kind people who say swap. Then when they've swapped, I then regret it and they have to swap back. So by the time we eat the food, it's cold.

So I am a natural groker. There you go. It's usually dogs, actually. It's dogs and Giles Brandreth, I reckon. I'm a testiculating groker. There you go. Got's usually dogs, actually. It's dogs and Giles Brandreth, I reckon. I'm a testiculating groker. There you go. That is your last one. And my final one is just, I don't know, it's something that you can't actually see me too well on here, Giles, hopefully, but I am wearing a cover slut. Because just before we came on air, I realised that my top, my shirt, had some moisturiser that had been spilt down it and it just looked very dodgy.

So I put on a jumper over the top and that is a cover slut. It's an item of clothing worn over another to hide any unsightly blemishes. How interesting you used the word dodgy. When does that come about to mean something's a bit doubtful? Dodging is to move out of the way, isn't it? Exactly. But that's what a criminal would do, wouldn't it? So I think the criminal sense of dodging and sort of, I'm just thinking in the French

web, esquiver, if you're full of dodges and tricksy and artful, I think it kind of became associated with what you might get up to. That takes us back to Dickens, of course, the artful dodger. Of course, artful dodger. Good. Nothing dodgy about my poem this week. It's from Shakespeare's play Twelfth Night, performed this week, well, last week, in the last few days, first, I think, 1600, so quite a long time ago. It's my favourite Shakespeare comedy. And there's a lovely song in it, sung by Festy, that I'm going to read

as my poem of the week. And I love this song because it contains some of my favourite words, written by Shakespeare a long time ago. When that I was, and a little tiny boy, With hey-ho, the wind and the rain, A foolish thing was but a toy, For the rain it raineth every day. But when I came to man's estate, With hey-ho, the wind and the rain, Against knaves and thieves men shut their gate, For the rain it raineth every day.

But when I came, alas, to wive, With hey-ho, the wind and the rain, By swaggering could I never thrive, For the rain it raineth every day. But when I came unto my beds, With hey-ho, the thrive for the rain it raineth every day but when I came unto my beds with hey ho the wind and the rain with tosspots still had drunken heads for the rain it raineth every day a great while ago the world begun with hey ho the wind and the rain but that's all one our play is done and we'll strive to please you every day.

I love that. It's absolutely beautiful. It also just reminded me of the original meaning of tosspot. Do you remember somebody who just tossed back their pot of beer? That's what we want to be. Let's have a year where we're all tosspots, happily tossing back our beer or whatever we like most. That's our aim. We aim to please you every day or at least every week. There's a new Something Rhymes with Purple every Tuesday. There are up to nearly 100 past episodes. You can find them there. And I hope you'll find us this time next week. And if you've enjoyed it, please spread the word. And if you want to get in touch, it's purple at somethingelse.com. Something Rhymes with Purple is a Something Else production.

It was produced by Lawrence Bassett with additional production from Harriet Wells, Steve Ackerman, Ella McLeod, Jay Beale, and the tosspot incarnate himself, Gully. Gully, and you know, I glanced up the other day when he was being carried through the office on his litter, and I have to say, testiculus habit et bene pendentes. Well done, Gully.