Something Was Wrong - S11 E1: [Ashley] Most Dangerous Time

Episode Date: January 6, 2022

This week we will hear Ashley Hall’s story -- told by her Mother Lucia, and her sister Jessa. Please note, due to the public nature of this story, real names will be used for this episode. *Content warning: This episode contains descriptions of psychological and physical violence, and murder. Join the Justice for Ashley - Stop Domestic Violence public Facebook group here. **Resources: The Domestic Violence Hotline offers free and confidential support, 24/7 at 1.800.799.SAFE (7233), text "START" to 88788 or chat with someone confidentially at https://www.thehotline.orgThe National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV)'s mission is to lead, mobilize and raise our voices to support efforts that demand a change of conditions that lead to domestic violence such as patriarchy, privilege, racism, sexism, and classism. We are dedicated to supporting survivors and holding offenders accountable and supporting advocates. https://ncadv.org/contact-usFor more free mental health resources, please visit SomethingWasWrong.com/Resources Sources: Emma E. Fridel and James Alan Fox: Gender Differences in Patterns and Trends in U.S. Homicide, 1976–2017 http://doi.org/10.1089/vio.2019.0005Violence and Gender: Published in Volume: 6 Issue 1: March 11, 2019Petrosky E, Blair JM, Betz CJ, Fowler KA, Jack SP, Lyons BH: Racial and Ethnic Differences in Homicides of Adult Women and the Role of Intimate Partner Violence: United States, 2003–2014. MMWR Morb Mortal Wkly Rep 2017; 66:741–746. Jul 21;66(28):741-746. doi: 10.15585/mmwr.mm6628a1. PMID: 28727682; PMCID: PMC5657947.Government of Western Australia Department of Communities Child Protection and Family Support: Fact Sheet 3: Perpetrator Characteristics Adapted from: Perpetrator accountability in Child Protection Practice – A resource for child protection workers about engaging and responding to men who perpetrate family and domestic violence, Department for Child Protection, Government of Western Australia, 2013.The Press-Enterprise: CRIME BLOTTER: San Bernardino woman brutally stabbed; husband sought: Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VOOL-eQkubQ December 3rd 2013**Something Was Wrong’s theme song was originally composed by Glad Rags and is covered this season by Kenna and the Kings. Support and listen to Kenna and the Kings on  Spotify, YouTube , and check out their albums! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey, prime members, you can listen to something was wrong early and add free on Amazon music. Download the app today. I'm Candace DeLong, and on my new podcast, Killer Psychie Daily, I share a quick 10-minute rundown every weekday on the motivations and behaviors of the cold-butter killers you read about in the news. Listen to the Amazon Music Exclusive Podcast Killer Psychie Daily in the Amazon Music exclusive podcast killer psyche daily in the Amazon music app. Download the app today. Something was wrong is intended for mature audiences. Episodes can discuss topics that can be triggering such as emotional, physical, and sexual

violence, suicide, and murder. I am not a therapist or a doctor. If you're in need of support, please visit something was wrong.com slash resources. For a list of nonprofit organizations that can help, some names have been changed for anonymity purposes. Opinions expressed by the guests on the show are their own and do not necessarily represent the views of myself or audio chuck. Resources and source material are linked in the episode notes. Thank you so much for listening. are linked in the episode notes. Thank you so much for listening. In 2019, a Department of Child Protection study

found that the number of women murdered by an intimate partner had increased to an average of almost four women a day. It reflected a gradual rise in the figures since 2014 after a study reduction over the previous 40 years. Of those killed by an intimate partner, about three-quarters are female. Homicides occur in women of all ages and among all races and ethnicities, but young women of marginalized groups are disproportionately affected.

Purportrators of family and domestic violence can vary in age and be from any socioeconomic demographic, cultural background, ethnicity or religion. They can occupy any profession or live in any geographic region. Purportrators can be any gender, however, the vast majority are male. In 2015, homicide caused the death of 3,519 girls and women in the United States. Across all racial ethnic groups of women, over half of female homicides for which circumstances were known

were interpersonal violence related, with about 90% of these women being killed by their current or former intimate partner. I'm Tiffany Reese, and this is Something Was Wrong. You're thinking of me, you don't know me You're thinking of me, you don't know me At all, you're thinking of me, you don't know me, yeah, at all. You don't know anybody, you don't know anybody, Till you talk to someone.

Today we'll hear Ashley Hall's story, told by her mother, Lucia and her sister, Jessa. Please note, due to the public nature of this story, real names will be used for this episode. My name is Jessa McLean. My sister is Ashley Hall or Ashley Atherley, formerly known as that. She was my older sister. She's about six years older than me. And she is actually my half sister. So growing up, she was with us half the time. But I always considered her my sister because I felt like I was with her pretty often and pretty close with her. She was very outgoing.

With her being six years older, of course, we did have that age gap, so I wasn't always on the same page as her, of course, but knowing her and knowing her friends, she was definitely like the life of the party and everyone loved her. She was always just so sweet to everyone. I remember her being a part of Best Buddies

and just knowing that she just had such a great heart and everybody loved Ashley. If you knew her, you loved her. So she was just such a bright light. Ashley met Edley in 2006 while working together at a bank. Here's Ashley's mom, Lucia. At that time, she was actually engaged in living with her fiance at the time.

Shortly after she started with the bank, she broke off her engagement with him, just kind of abruptly, and she moved back home. And then about two weeks later, she went out with another girlfriend to one of the local dance clubs. She didn't come home that night.

I kept trying to call her and call her. I couldn't get a hold of her. She was gone for the entire weekend to the point where her voice mail was full and we really were concerned. Long story short for that is that she was with Ed Lee, this gentleman. He didn't want her to use her phone. He wanted her end of idea detention. And that was pretty much how it was presented to us.

So that was our first experience with that this was a new relationship. So it didn't start off very well for us in meeting him. I still feel like those days are a little bit blurry for me just because it was such a crazy start to their relationship with us not knowing who he was and then all of a sudden they ran off together and that's kind of how we met him. Unfortunately, it kind of started out with a little bit of a bad taste, but once we met him, of course, we tried to start with a clean slate and just trying to get to know him. He was really nice starting out. He was nice to her.

He was nice to us. He was outgoing. He was adventurous. They did a lot of fun things together. So I feel like starting out, he was very sweet and down to earth. They quickly continued their relationship. It moved very fast.

He ended up moving in with her. We then found out that he actually was still married, although separated. And so that was a bit of a concern as well, but we saw some signs in the very beginning, although he was very charismatic, very nice guy, very well spoken. He had a decent job, seemed educated. All of those things were right, and she definitely felt he was Prince Charming. There were still some concerns because of how controlling he was about her and her time. Probably about six months later, they moved in together, and probably mid to late of that year Ashley became pregnant. There were concerns regarding their relationship

during that time, but for the most part Ashley was happy. I still feel like there was a little bit of a cloud over it, but for the most part I do remember it being more of an exciting time. She was finally becoming a mom, and I remember being super excited to know that I was going to become an aunt. And then when we found out that it was a girl, it was even more exciting, just because I could totally see my sister as a girl mom.

But she was nervous for the typical mom things, not necessarily because of her relationship. I'm sure that that had something to do with it. But the typical just getting through pregnancy and having a healthy child. Two weeks before the birth of their daughter, Ashley and Edley got married. They got married in the courthouse. I was actually the person, their witness, so to speak. So I was the only one present when they got married. I'll be honest, I wasn't exactly happy, but it's what she wanted. They wanted to have the same name so that way the baby's name on the brush certificate and everything matched and so that was their decision. Shortly after their baby girl was born, their first child, the signs of domestic violence really started to surface.

The very first time that it was prevalent, that there was physical abuse going on, Ashley had gone to dinner or something with a girlfriend of hers and she'd come home. There was some type of an altercation with them and he had shoved her. And when he did, she pocket-diled the girlfriend that she had just finished having dinner with. The girlfriend overheard him screaming at her and pushing her and she called the police. The police came and they did arrest him for domestic violence, but she quickly dismissed the charges and he was back home.

That particular situation uncovered that we had more serious, it wasn't just a thought or feeling there was evidence now that there was physical abuse in the relationship. That's pretty much where the family and Ed Lee's relationship really had some distance in it. I had many conversations with him from that day forward that we would coexist, so to speak, because of how he was treating her. That cycle of everything's great to the tension,

to the abuse continued on for the next year. At one point, he actually broke the baby's crib during one of the instances. The police were called and because Ashley was not in the house when the police came, she was given the option to leave. And at one point, she was made to leave the baby with him, even though he had just broke the crib. It was just really difficult to manage legally. So therefore she always went back

because she had that fear. As the relationship progressed, Ashley's family noticed Edley isolating her further. When they first started dating, I feel like we saw them a fair amount, but when it came to holidays, I remember when my sister first had her first daughter, she used to talk about how she wanted to teach them the history of all of the holidays, which I thought was kind of cool, but interesting, just because my sister was always really big on holidays growing up, just because that's how our family was. I feel like when she talked about how like for Halloween, she didn't want them to go trick or treating until they learned about the history of trick or treating and how that worked. So I thought that it was interesting to see that point of view.

Looking back at it now, I'm sure that that was more on Ed Lee, not wanting to celebrate it. So that was per excuses to stall celebrating the holidays. But at the time, I just thought that it was a different way to approach the holidays for her. He was just never really present at the holidays, and that's when we learned that he didn't celebrate them. After the birth of their first child, Ashley was laid off from her job at the bank. There was some cutbacks in her department, and she wanted to leave in the bank for a short period of time, and was going to go back to schooling finish her degree He still worked at the bank During that time she got pregnant again in 2010 with their second daughter

the cycle of violence Continued in fact it started growing probably about every three months There was a situation that had happened where she would move home for a couple of days. At one point there was an incident where while she was pregnant with the second child she was about five months pregnant, he locked her out of the apartment and would not let her back in and wound up shoving her. She had to make the decision whether or not she left or she endangered the child she was carrying. Unfortunately, that also meant if she left, she was leaving her other child with him. And that's pretty much what the police told her. She had to make a choice.

At that time, she moved home with me for a very short period. And when she went to see their child that was there with him, she was locking herself in the baby's room to visit with the baby. I was in a car downstairs, he didn't know I was there. They were having some discussion and all of a sudden I saw bins of things flying over their third story balcony onto the cars below. And so she came running out of the apartment and jumped in the car and said, we need to go.

And in the meantime, I called 911. He then realized I was there and he was ranting and raiding and hitting the car and whatnot. But when the police came, once again, they just made him go back to his apartment and told her to leave. So it was very difficult, of course, again, in fear of not having her daughter. She returned

back to the situation once his apologies came. Jessa also recalls an alarming incident that occurred while Ashley was pregnant with her second child. She typically did not necessarily talk to me about the negative experiences between them, probably because she didn't want me to know that she was going through it, and I'm sure that she was ashamed, and having to tell her mom was enough. However, there was one situation that I still to this day can't believe I kept a seeker from my parents for a while. She was probably eight months pregnant with the younger daughter, so this was her second pregnancy, and they had gotten into some sort of fight.

Not sure if it was physical because again, she didn't share all of the details, but I remember it was probably nine or ten o'clock at night and she called me asking if she could come over. And I lived with my parents at the time so she asked if she could come and I told her that I would come pick her up, but she didn't want my parents to wake up so she actually walked from her apartment all the way to our house, which was already about a 10 to 15 minute drive. So probably over an hour walk. So this was 10 o'clock at night, eight months pregnant, and she walked all the way to our house just to get away from the situation. Hi, I'm Lindsay Graham, the host of Wondery's podcast American scandal.

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one that would shatter the lives of countless children and force a heated debate about punishment and America's criminal justice system. Follow American scandal wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wonder App. Once their second child was born is when he started more so the isolation from family. In this process, very shortly after their second daughter was born, I think she was only maybe two weeks old because I remember thinking she's just too young to be taking such a long trip, but they wanted to go to California to visit his family, which makes sense that he would want his family to see the baby as well. It just seemed very odd because the baby hadn't even had their regular first couple of weeks

checkups. They were going to have to do it with some remote doctor in California. So they went to California with just a one-way ticket, which I found very strange and very alarming. Every time I would ask, when are you all coming back, there really wasn't a plan. They were gone for about, I'd say probably five or six weeks. When they returned, everything seemed to be fine. I was relieved at that. But then it reached a point where Ashley had gone back to work. So they were both

working at the bank again. She had gotten a promotion and he had been passed on a few. He was getting a little restless in his job. In the latter part of 2012, she said, we have something we need to tell you. They announced that Ed Lee had received a promotion and an opportunity to take this promotion, but it would be in California, and that they would need to move by January. At this point, we had already made arrangements that we were going to have this holiday celebration. He didn't think that holidays were important. They didn't have any value to him, and so very early on, he would not attend holidays. She often came by herself until eventually,

he made it so difficult for her to come when she returned that she chose not to. And so that was very difficult because we're a very close family. We had already made plans for that particular Christmas in 2012 that I would have the girls for Christmas Eve and I was so excited. So now it meant even more to us because this might be our last Christmas with them at this point. So it's really sad, very concerned, especially given that just probably two months before this, she was at my house for one of those periods

where she had moved in with us again and that they were looking into divorce and then had just returned. So this is just a few months after that and now they're talking about moving to California. We all did our best to talk to Ashley to say, why don't you let him go get settled and then go with the girls after

because the plan was, is that they would move there and live with his mom until they found their own place. But he wasn't going to have that. In fact, he started selling off all of their belongings, all of their furniture. He traded in her car and his car for just one vehicle. He slowly just removed everything from the situation. The original plan was as they needed to be their January 1. And then about a week after they made this announcement, said that that had changed and that they needed to be there by Christmas Eve. And so they would be leading on the 22nd of December.

Of course, that was very disappointing. But even more concerning than anything is that they were going to be leaving. So I became very suspicious and very concerned. And so I had a conversation with Ashley prior to them leaving, just kind of questioning what this job was, what their plan was, why the rush to get there, that it was very odd for him to be starting a new position right before the holidays with a large bank as he worked for. In that conversation, in really questioning and really asking about how his mom felt and this job and whatnot, I uncovered that he really didn't have a job yet.

It was an interview. And so, of course, now I'm really pushing for, let him get there, let him get settled. You can go after, but again, that was pushed back. And they left on the 22nd of December to get to California. I remember just being scared for her because at that point was when we knew that things weren't great between them and I never expected it to get to the point that it did, but at that time I knew that him isolating her all the way to California. The complete opposite side of the

nation. I knew that that was not going to be good for her, especially because once they were there and they had the kids there, it was going to be a really sticky situation if she ever did want to leave. I remember being really upset when they finally decided to leave because I just knew that it was going to be a huge change and I just hoped that she was going to be a huge change. And I just hoped that she was going to be okay and that the girls were going to be okay with the transition as well. Ashley's mom again became concerned when she received a phone call from her one evening in February.

And that came with a phone call at about 11 o'clock at night. And actually it was a text message. And it said, Mom, I'm so stupid, I should have listened to everyone. And so of course that panicked a little bit and responded, Ashley, can we talk? And I said, where are you? She was in the bathroom in one of the bedrooms at his mom's house, locked in the bathroom with her iPad.

She had been on a FaceTime call with her younger brother. She's a half brother that her dad has with his new wife. And he had just turned 10 years old. He had gotten an iPad and so he was FaceTiming with Ashley and they were talking. And it's the first time they probably talked in a while because with this relationship with Edley, Ashley's relationship with her father was very strained

because of it. So it was kind of a special moment for Ashley, but Edley walked in while they were on the phone and he got upset that she was still having a relationship with her family, even though they're over 3000 miles away. And so evidently what had happened was is there was some type of discussion or argument or whatever, she was holding both of the girls in her arms and he grabbed a bottle of laundry

detergent and dumped it over her head. And of course the girls as well. I didn't know this at first, at first. All I saw was a picture that she had sent me of herself with this blue stuff all over her shirt. And she looked so drawn and soaked in and worn. And I said, Ashley, what is the blue stuff? Remember, this is all by text, and that's when she disclosed what had happened. I told her, Ashley, I'm gonna need to call the police.

You can't be there. And she said, oh, mom, please don't. Please don't. His mom will be so upset. I won't have anywhere to go. I said, you will have somewhere to go. I'm going to call the police. Well, during this last little bit of conversation, I started losing connection with her. She was having some internet issues. And I was panicking because I didn't know something had happened. One of my texts was, if you don't answer me in the next minute, I'm calling 911.

And she didn't. And so I started calling the police to call in that there was an issue. And just as I'm talking to the dispatcher, Ashley responds and said, mom, it's okay. His mom is here. She's gonna keep him calm. And I'm gonna stay in the bedroom with the girls all night.

I'll leave in the morning. I begged her to let me have the police come. She, of course, begged me not to that it would make things worse. Hindsight, of course, I wish I would have just gone through with it. At that point, she, after that altercation, moved from his mother's home in San Bernardino

to in with his father that lived closer to Los Angeles. She moved there with the girls and Ed Lee stayed living in his moms. Between February and June of 2013, Ed Lee slowly moved himself back into Ashley's graces and moved into his father's house where she had been living with their daughters. Ashley got a job back with the same bank that she had worked for in Florida.

She had gotten a position in downtown Los Angeles and was working. This is when we found out that he had never gotten the job with the bank in California when he went there, that he had some fail attempts of doing personal training, and he did not have employment since they had been there in December. June of 2013, Lucia got a distressing phone call from Ashley, saying that she needed to fly home to Florida. And I told her, you need to bring the girls with you. We'll buy you a ticket, and you need to come home then. And we'll deal the legal and barriamifications whatever it needs to be, but Shoa's believed he was a great father and that she didn't want to change that for the girls. I assured her that there

were ways to work through that, but that she needed to have her support system. During that time, he actually even got on the phone and started screaming and yelling and blaming everybody else. It's your fault because you're talking to her. It's his parents fault because they're doing whatever. The next day Ashley flew home to Tampa with the two girls. I think she came on a Friday. During that time, I begged her just to not have any communication with him, take the time to figure out what she needed to do. We talked about getting her a job. We started doing that research. And then on Monday, I needed to go back to work.

I got a text message about 10 or 10 30 that morning that said, I know you'll be very mad at me, but I have to go back. I'm at the airport getting ready to take off. What had happened was that he had convinced her she needed to come home because he would say that she kidnapped the kids and that she needed to return. He sent a friend of his, he called it his cousin

to come and pick her up and take her to the airport. Of course, I was very upset. There was nothing I could do at that point because she's already boarding the plane. Didn't really give us any option to how we could protect her. Ashley and her daughters returned to California and about a month later,

they moved into an apartment in San Bernardino with Edley. In the meantime, Ashley still had her job in Los Angeles. So she was taking the train from San Bernardino to Los Angeles every day for work. It took a couple of hours of riding the multiple trains. She would work and then she would be home late. In August, they got their own apartment and finally she talked to me and let me know she thought things were going well. Then in mid-September, she sent me a message asking how she could get her address

changed on her driver's license, on her Florida driver's license. And I said, well, I don't know that you're going to be able to change it to a California address, but she really wasn't telling me why at that point, but with a little bit of conversation found that what she wanted to do is she wanted to get a bank account, and she needed her driver's license to be updated. I didn't get all of the information, but come to find out she had made the decision that she was going to leave him, and she had made an arrangement with one of his aunts, which was his mom's sister, to hide her. So for a time period, she left him late September of 2013. I don't know what conversation or argument led to that happening, but I do remember him

trying to strangle her and her having bruises on her neck. I do believe this is another time that she took a picture of the evidence and sent it over to my mom so that she had it, but she definitely had marks on her neck to prove that he had tried to strangle her. That was her final straw that she realized that she just could not be in that type of situation anymore and she couldn't have her girls around that as well. He would not let her take the girls. And so the aunt actually gave her this mechanism

that you can put on a bedroom door lock that would allow you to lock yourself in a room. And so she would go there for the weekend to be with the girls, but she would lock herself in this room. Some of this I found out after the fact. She did this for several weeks, and during this time what she was telling him was, is that they needed to work through their differences,

they needed to see a therapist, so evidently they started seeing a therapist, and they continued through the process. During those therapy sessions, she asked for a divorce. So divorce papers were filed, and that was underway. After Ashley filed for divorce, she got her own place in the Los Angeles area.

At this point, she was pretty much supporting the girls from a distance, because I think he had a part-time job for somewhere else at some point, but nothing that was substantial. And so that was the reasoning that she gave is that she was supporting them and that she was going to have them move with her. And so the beginning of November, the girls went on the train with her and went to her apartment and they moved in with her. Between the beginning of November and Thanksgiving, he really didn't see the girls.

But as they approached Thanksgiving, he wanted to see the girls. Now mind you, holidays were never a thing for him. And so it was a bit odd, but it was always a matter of convenience for him, of when he would celebrate or how he would celebrate something. And so the plan was that they would meet and eat at a local restaurant for dinner. Jessa recalls speaking with her that Thanksgiving. I remember that she had actually called us

because we were at my parents' house for Thanksgiving. We were just about to eat dinner, I believe, and she called us just to say happy Thanksgiving. So it was a really quick phone call, but I remember talking to her and the girls, and we were able to tell them happy Thanksgiving and that we loved each other. And then we both kind of went off the phone

to go have dinner or celebrate Thanksgiving with the people that we were with. It was a very short and sweet conversation. Actually the last time I got to talk to her. It was on Thanksgiving day and I remember it was around one o'clock Eastern time, so it was rather early in California. But I remember realizing that she wasn't in her apartment and I asked her where she was. She said she was in San Bernardino. I made the assumption she was at his mom's house, but come to find out they were actually

at their old apartment, which is where he was living in San Bernardino. The day after Thanksgiving, I tried to text her to see whether or not she had sizes for the girls because I was doing some shopping. And she didn't respond to my text. And I didn't think anything of it. I just figured maybe she's working. And so I I didn't think anything of it. I just figured maybe she's working and so I really didn't think much of it.

I actually did crossfit with one of Edley's cousins. That Saturday she had called me. It was more towards the evening. She called me and just asked if I had heard from Ashley or Edley. And I told her that the last that we had spoken to her was on Thanksgiving. She was concerned because the babysitter, Ed Lee's cousin in California that had the girls

hadn't heard from Ashley or Ed Lee. And they had dropped the girls off on Friday morning. And now it's Saturday afternoon, and they hadn't heard from either of them. So the concern kind of arose wondering what had happened or if their phones had died or what was going on. I had told the cousin that had called me at least cousin that I would ask my mom if she had spoken to her. And when I called my mom, I remember that Saturday, she was over at a neighbor's house.

So Jess, of course, called me and I said, well, let me see what I can do. Ashley did have a second job that she had gotten for some extra money at a hookah lounge as a waitress with some people that she worked with at the bank. And so I was going on Facebook trying to figure out who those people were and trying to reach out. I was putting urgent messages on her email and on her Facebook and on our text messages. I need you to call me right away.

I wasn't getting any responses. On Sunday, my mom and I actually spent the day together and when we got back to the house in the afternoon, I do remember spending the next probably, it feels like forever, but probably the next few hours messaging anybody on Facebook that might have heard from her, trying to text anybody who might have had any contact with her, just anybody. And as the time went by, I remember our hope kept getting lost. And we were really struggling with what the end result was going to be. But we just kept hoping that we would get a hold of a hospital or get a hold of a hookal lounge that had heard from her between that Thursday and that time. And we weren't having any luck.

Nobody had heard checked into a hospital. Nobody had heard from him. And then of course at that point, everybody that I'm messaging is telling me, please let me know everything's okay. I called the cousin back and said, have we heard from Ashley or Edley? And they said, no, actually they had heard from him

evidently on Saturday or they weren't really clear about what the timing was. But the only phone call, only communication they had received was from Edley at one point that was a very confusing conversation. He had called his dad and said something about a coffin and something about a hospital, but really couldn't make out what was going on. And so, of course, that was big red flags for me, like what is going on. And so,

they were having difficulty putting in a missing person persons for her because I guess in California somebody must need to actually sign off for it. And so I asked the cousin if she would go ahead and put in the missing persons. While we were in the process of putting in the missing persons and we were speaking to the LAPD, I received a phone call from a detective out of San Bernardino. I remember this very vividly. My mom was out in the backyard and just crying, not knowing what was going to happen. And then I remember she was in the bedroom when she finally got the phone call.

And my brother and I were there. My dad was there. I remember when she got the phone call. And my brother and I were there, my dad was there. I remember when she got the phone call, we knew exactly what happened because she just fell to her knees screaming. It was very emotional at that point because we knew what they had just told her. I remember my brother being super angry and we didn't really know what to say. So at that point, I remember calling my then boyfriend now husband and was just like, I need you to come here. You need to leave work. So he came as fast as he could. And then I just remember the next hour, we just had

friends and family just pouring into our house because the news had gotten out. And it was just such a crazy blur that entire day and that entire night was just so insane once we finally found the news. The detective said that they had found Ashley in his apartment and that she had been killed and that he was nowhere to be found. It was kind of like we turned into zombies. That evening, my mom and dad, and then my sister's dad and stepmom bought tickets to fly out the next morning to California because that was the soonest they could get out.

But the only airport that they could get out of was Orlando, and we lived in Tampa. So they bought those tickets tickets and I remember my dad saying he didn't know if he could do it but he was gonna try. So they all drove out the next morning and when they got to the airport my dad decided that he needed to be home with my brother and I. At the time I was, so that was 2013, at the time I was 22 and my brother would have been 23. So when that all happened, yes, we're older and we're adults, but we also just lost our sister. So my dad felt as if he needed to stay home with us and he didn't know if he

honestly had the strength to go through all of that because the reason why my sister needed somebody to come was to identify her body and then go through all of the legal things that needed to happen. When Lucia landed in California, she was able to gain a little more insight into the last moments of Ashley's life. From what we found out is that Thanksgiving, she had spent the day with the girls and him. He had changed the plans that they would have dinner at his apartment.

He had borrowed his cousin's truck to drive there. Evidently, when the evening was done, he wouldn't take Ashley home. And so she ended up spending the night there Thanksgiving night. She had worked the next morning. And so that was part of the reason not to spend the night there in addition to the safety issue. But the next morning, he drove her to Los Angeles. We're not sure whether or not he dropped off the girls at the cousin's house before he

dropped her off or after. That was unclear. But he took her to work. According to co-worker, she was very disheveled when she arrived. She was wearing a men's t-shirt and the jeans she was wearing from the day previous. They could tell that she was not freshly dressed as she normally would be. She was then around 11 o'clock, seen taking a phone call and exiting work very quickly.

And one particular coworker noticed because he had plans to do lunch with her. She was quickly walking and he was trying to get her attention and she just went. She didn't take her scarf with her. She didn't take her she just went. She didn't take her scarf with her. She didn't take her purse with her. She didn't take her wallet with her. She just was going down into the parking lot.

She was seen getting into a dark colored vehicle car, which was known to be the ants' car that she frequently borrowed. But there was somebody else driving, which we later discovered, was Edley driving the car. It was noticed that the person opened the car to work from the inside for the passenger side and summons her to get in and then left. And that's the last time she was seen. When she was found in her apartment three days later. She was found in the bathroom. He had killed her with a knife. The knife is believed to have been from her apartment.

I say believe to be because during the trial, they were unable to necessarily prove that, but they did have pictures of her apartment knife drawer drawer, where of course she had only lived there six weeks or whatever it was. And when you opened up the drawer, there was only one knife missing, and it was the knife that would be the same positioning of the knife that she was killed with in his apartment.

So it's believed that when they left her office, that he then took her to her apartment. She was found with a prodding knife mark in her back along with a hole in her shirt. It's believed that that's where he switched from the ants car to the vehicle that he had barred from his cousin. And they drove back to San Bernardino. from his cousin and they drove back to San Bernardino. She also had multiple injuries that occurred in the vehicle to her face. Both of her eyes were crushed.

Her nose was broken. She had contusions in her mouth area and was heavily beaten in her face. Ultimately, she died from the knife wound to her neck, and that happened in the living room, but she was found in the bathroom. She was covered in a sheet. It's believed that he actually murdered her on Friday the day after Thanksgiving, sometime that evening. When the father received the odd phone call that he did saying something about the hospital and the coffin and whatnot, it's

alerted for some of the family members including his mother, his aunt, which is the aunt that had harbored Ashley, and the cousin that had loaned him the vehicle, went to Edley's apartment in San Bernardino to look for them. When they arrived, they saw the cousin's car there and they noticed that there was blood inside. They knocked on the door and he didn't answer. So the mother and the aunt had gone to get the manager to see if they could let them in.

And while they were gone, what we learned in the trial at least was that Edley had come to the door and the cousin had motioned him to run. So by the time the mom and the aunt came back to the apartment with the manager, Edley was gone. And of course the manager mentioned that they needed to call for a wellness check, the police came, they went to do a wellness check and when they

opened the door is when they had found Ashley deceased inside. A lot of things had to happen because we had two little girls that now have lost their mom. Ultimately have lost their dad. And so as I mentioned, my sister, myself, and my ex-husband all flew to California that Sunday night, Monday morning of December 1st, because we needed to identify Ashley's body, and we needed to make arrangements for the girls. Unfortunately, all three of us had to fly on different airlines because it was Thanksgiving weekend, and we had to fly into San Diego

because it was the closest we could get to all flying into one airport and then driving together. So as you can imagine, that was quite of an emotional six hour journey on a plane. When we arrived there, I remember coming down the escalators and opening our phones to seeing that already an article was posted with her picture and

identifying her and we hadn't even identified her yet. So that was quite alarm and quite disturbing at the same time. And there were details that were already being disclosed about how she died that we hadn't even discussed with the coronary yet. So again very disturbing. Police are looking for the husband of Ashley Atherley after she was found stabbed to death in her apartment in San Bernardino. He has not been seen or heard from since. And so police are now looking for him for questioning

and do consider him a suspect. Authorities are asking anybody with information to not confront him because they do consider him dangerous. We immediately drove to San Bernardino and connected with the police as well as with his family in order to make arrangements with the girls. They did determine that his family said they were fine with us taking the girls. They did not give us any pushback, which was a blessing. During this time, he was still missing, though, and so there was a lot of fear and a lot of risk that he would come for the girls, and we really didn't know where he was, and whether or not he was

being hidden by somebody or what. And so we ended up having to stay in California, the three of us and the two girls, for about 11 days. One reason why we had to stay that long was because we weren't allowed to immediately meet with the corner for the first 24 hours. They asked us to wait. I happened to have an ID card that they give in school where they do the kids' fingerprints and their pictures. I was able to bring that with me from her medical file at home and was able to provide that to them for identification. I actually did not have to identify her body in person and they were very, very kind and very, very compassionate in not wanting me to

see her in her current state because of the amount of time that she had been left in that apartment in her condition. So her identity was confirmed by her fingerprints as well as a tattoo that she had on her back. It was a cross with a drop of blood that said, I live for him, he died for me. Lucia quickly met with the district attorney in California to offer any details that might be helpful in their search for Eddley and worked with the courts to try and get custody of her grandchildren. We did meet with his cousin and father to get the girls from them. The girls stayed with us in a local hotel for those days until we could get approval from family court to be able to take them back to Florida for a

short period of time. So the judge did grant us 29 days which was considered grandparent visitation at the time, but when they returned they they would need to be in foster care, we're with his family, which his family had not shown any interest in that, and I was grateful for that. And so, I have one aunt and uncle that live in the San Francisco area, and they were loving enough to offer to be their foster parents, they are in California.

When I had to return in January with the girls, we moved to San Francisco area and lived there for a couple of months until Florida and California could make the arrangements to allow them to live in Florida. And so during that time, we of course needed to bury our daughter, and so her body needed to be shipped back to Florida. That was part of the time it took us 11 days to get a lot of that settled before she could be brought back to Florida. In the meantime, Jessica, my youngest daughter,

was graduating from college. So literally we had her sister's funeral one day at her graduation the next. I still had classes that I need to finish. So I had to email all my professors and most of them gave me a pass on my last assignment because that's where we were at was the very end. I remember the one class that made me take my last exam was an online course on domestic violence, which I still cannot believe was the class that I had to finish. So I had to take that last exam and I remember reading the questions and immediately relating them to my sister and thinking, wow, I finished out that course and I remember it was such a way to off my shoulders to be done with my college courses knowing that I was going to be graduating.

I think my mom made it back like a day or two before my graduation. I remember her being a complete zombie, but I was kind of excited at the same time because my nieces were able to be there at my graduation, which was a blessing in disguise. So those two weeks were really just kind of a whirlwind and just trying to figure out what our new normal was going to look like. And on top of that, this is now in December and then a week or two later, we had Christmas. So that 29 days did allow us for that time and allowed us to be back as a nuclear family, which was good. But then as I mentioned, we did need to take the girls back to California. So I returned to California with them. While I was in California with them, he was still on the run. Ed Lee ran for approximately 45 days. He was listed as one of the FBI's most wanted.

There was all kinds of law enforcement looking for him both in California and Belize, which is where his family is originally from and has some connections to in Florida, because there was comments throughout that 45-day period that he was coming to Florida to come harm our family. He was a coward. I mean, that's the easiest way to explain how we felt towards him fleeing. And of course we have no idea what really was going through his head, but we aren't sure if someone was helping him. We have the assumption that there has to have been a family member or a friend that was helping him to not get caught. He was spotted a couple times because his name was out there, his picture was out there on the news. So in California, people were keeping a lookout, especially security guards.

I remember he wasn't supposed to be able to get on any flights out of California. I remember being very scared because we had no idea what he was capable of at that point. We had an idea of what he was capable of because he did it to my sister, but we didn't know if that anger was going to go onto anyone else. So we were very nervous. My thought process when he was on the run was that he wanted to at least see his girls, whether that was to say goodbye or to try to take them. So it was definitely a scary month and a half. I had to leave to return to California. After that 29 days, I believe it was like the 9th of January, 2014 that I had to return.

But it was just a few days before that I had received a phone call from that original cousin that called Jessa saying that they couldn't find Ashley and Ed Lee, the one that went to school with her at USF, asking if she could meet me and Jessica to see the girls. And I thought it was really odd because it had been a few weeks after Ashley had been killed and we hadn't heard from her. And out of the blue, she's asking for us to meet. At that point, of course,

they were really considered words of the state of California. And so I called the social worker and talked to her about it and explained that I was a little uncomfortable and that I didn't really understand the relationship here and had some concerns. And so she asked that any other contact other than my family, a media family,

needed to go through her for approval. And so I gave the cousin the the social workers' information to contact, but she never did contact them to make the arrangement for us to meet. Once he was found in Florida weeks later, I questioned whether or not maybe that was part of the plan was for him to be part of that meet-up, but we don't know how long he was in Florida. We do know that the reason he turned himself in was, is that one of his relatives was planning on revealing his whereabouts to claim the reward money that was up for his capture.

And that's when he turned himself in with an attorney to the FBI. I want to say it was the 18th of February if I'm not mistaken. He had crossed the country. We've never really known exactly how he crossed other than what he is revealed and he says he hitchhiked, but he made his way across the country and ended up in Tampa.

Shortly thereafter, Edley was extra-dited from Florida to California. He was charged with first degree murder and was given a $1 million bail but never posted bond. The trial would not occur until October of 2015, so it was two years before we went to trial. During that time, I continued to work with both California and Florida in getting custody of the girls in order for them to move forward with their lives. When we were in California, those very first few days, we contacted a group here in Tampa called Suncoast Kids Place that do trauma counseling, grief counseling for children. And they were very, very helpful in straddle and helping us deliver that news to the girls of what had happened in

something that they can understand and also deal with. And so I'll be honest, I was not able to utter the words myself, my sister, Kathy actually ended up having to tell the girls, but the message to them was, is that daddy hurt mommy and mommy went to heaven. And that's pretty much what they knew for quite a while. And to this day, they don't know exactly what happened. They only know that daddy killed mommy. Once we came back to Florida,

we reconnected with their therapist and kept their therapy going for their grief and for just dealing with this new life that they had. In the process, we did need to remove his rights, his parental rights. I know that seems like why would we need to remove them? He obviously did something terrible, but in our country, you're innocent until proven guilty. The criminal portion of it and the family portion of it legally were two separate entities. And so the family court system, of course, gave him parameters. He had to meet if he couldn't meet them slowly at chipped away at his parental rights.

It took a full year to the day for his parental rights to be removed. And so December 1, 2014, his parental rights were vacated, and we were able to move forward with adoption proceedings. And so my husband, Rick and I filed for adoption for both girls. We did need to do that through the state of California with the compact agreement with Florida. It took until August 12th of 2015 to get their adoption finalized. And so August 12th, we legally adopted the girls.

In the meantime, starting in probably January 2015, every couple of months there was a new date set for the trial. It would be scheduled and then canceled and then scheduled and then canceled. Finally, in October of 2015, the trial began in San Bernardino, the trial lasted about six weeks, ending the day before Thanksgiving, ironically. It was probably the most difficult process

to go through. I, myself, my husband, Ashley Stan, my ex-husband, and his wife attended every day of the trial. We moved to California for those six weeks. It was very difficult because the criminal, and I can call him a criminal because he was convicted, has a lot of rights. And so a lot of things don't get disclosed to the jury. And so that's hard to watch knowing some of the things that are being held back.

So it was very difficult in that way. The only time I did not stay in the room is when they should pictures, her autopsy pictures. We had a wonderful district attorney. She had told me that she did not want me to see those pictures, that she would have the judge stop the trial if I wouldn't leave the courtroom. And so I obliged, although I did stay in the ear shot,

I didn't look, but I did hear what was going on in the trial. I did not attend the trial, since it was such a long trial and we didn't know how long it would be. They shared all the information with us that they were able to while the trial was going on. I'm glad that I wasn't there for the entire trial because I know that pictures were shown

and a lot of evidence was brought to light that would have been really tough to see. So it definitely took a lot of strength from my parents to be there for that. Ultimately, he was convicted of second-degree murder, primarily because remember I said there were those pictures of the drawer at Ashley's apartment in Los Angeles where that knife was missing and also the car of the ants that he picked her up at her office in. Those pictures that were taken that day were taken on an iPad.

Unfortunately, when it came time to trial, they were unable to extract the pictures that were taken from that part of the crime scene. So none of those pictures were able to be shown in court and the only reference to the knife at her apartment was from an officer that gave his recanting of the scene. And so those were some key factors that would have possibly helped the jury to see the pre-meditation piece of it. He was convicted of second-degree murder with a knife in the state of California that is considered 15-to-life plus one additional year for the knife and so he got 16 to life for his time

Of course by this point he had already served two years and so he is up for parole based on some of the Credits that California gives to their inmates He is up for parole for his first parole in 2026, I believe. And so that is, of course, just around the corner. We are told that it is very unlikely that he would get parole, at least his first time applying, but it's still a process that we're going to need to go through. And we will be there to assure that he does not get released. When they had the final sentencing in December, I knew that I wanted to be there to assure that he does not get released.

When they had the final sentencing in December, I knew that I wanted to be there for that because I did want to see him. I wanted to see his face and see his reaction to his final sentencing and I wanted to be able to speak. So I had the opportunity to make an impact statement and speak technically to the jury, but he heard everything that I said. And it was just nice to know that even though I'll never really have full closure, it was nice to know that I got to say my piece and that he didn't have an option but to listen to it.

And so, that was almost two years from when Ashley was murdered in November 2013. And so right after the adoption was finalized in August of 2015, I had my break. I guess it's the easiest way to say it. I was holding this wall up or facade that said, I have to be strong because if I'm weak, then they may not let me have the girls. And I just had all of these terrible emotions running. But once the adoption was finalized, late August, I had a little bit of a breakdown emotionally. So I did take some time off of work at that point and stayed out of work up until after the trial was completed and we were back.

The rest of the family, we kind of took turns with how we dealt with the emotional side of it. The girls, there's comes in waves. Right now, they're not in any intense therapy. They're doing really, really well. But early on, the youngest one was only two and a half when their mom was killed and their dad was no longer in their life. The older one was five and a half. They're now 10 and 13 and so a lot of eight years have almost passed. But the older one has some memories of her mom. The younger one has none of her own memories. We do everything we can to make sure that they know who mommy is. They don't call me mommy. They call me Mimi. That doesn't change.

We talk about mommy all the time. It's a free conversation. They don't ask about their dad. If they were to ask me a question, I would find a way to talk to them about it. It's not like it's a taboo thing to talk about. They just don't. And so we don't initiate it. They might ask something about Daddy's looks or something like that. And we just answer those questions because it's part of them. We do recognize

that as painful as it is. But overall, they're doing fantastic as they can. It's difficult and there's always those little challenges that they run into the Mother's Day things and how will they explain it to their friends and things like that that will be a challenge throughout their life. We know that there are going to be times in their life where more therapy is going to be necessary

around milestone parts of their lives. But we do have a very strong family network and also extended family network that has been just amazing. And I don't think that we would have gotten through without it for sure. Well, they are so incredibly lucky to have you in your support system. What do you hope that others can gain from hearing Ashley's story? Thank you for asking that. I grew up in an abuse of home. My dad abused my mom. And so I was not foreign to

recognizing what domestic violence looked like. In addition, my sister used to work for the Spring of Tampa Bay, which is our local domestic violence shelter. Our mother, in fact, she was a client at the Spring of Tampa Bay, at one point. And so that is kind of how we keyed into that we saw some of those qualities in their relationship. That first incident in February where the laundry detergent was poured over her head. I had a conversation with her and I gave her information of the local shelter in Riverside, California. I gave her the

website. I talked to her about putting together a bag that had a quick change of clothes maybe and all of the documents that she needed for her and the girls. And again, this was back in February and if you remember, she didn't actually leave to come home at that point. She wound up moving in with his father at that point. When they were seeing that therapist and she was filing for divorce, I begged her to come home and do the divorce from here and all of that But other than that, we really hadn't talked about this safe pack, so to speak

When I arrived in California after she was murdered We connected with her job at the time the police of course had gone there first and there was a The police, of course, had gone there first and there was a satchel that they had found at her office underneath her desk and the police acquired it and then they gave it to us. And in that satchel, we're all of the documents that I would need or that she would need for the girls and for her.

Social security numbers, birth certificates, school records, you name it was in there. And so I just broke down because it meant she was listening. And so we took that and actually with a local attorney here in Tampa, he heard that part of the story. We put together what we called Ashley's safe pack. He's in a state attorney and he had a system, I believe it's called safe lock if I'm not mistaken. It's a virtual system where you can upload all of your legal documents and then have a passcode system in order to actually access them.

So the thought was, is that if you had this service available to domestic violence victims, that they could upload all of this information to this virtual safe, and they could give that passcode to someone that they trusted, their mom, their grandmother, their best friend, whoever. And if anything ever happened to them, that person would have access to it. Or better yet, even if something didn't happen to them, they wouldn't have to take anything with them. They could leave, and they could have access

to that information when they needed it. Because one of the things that happens in a domestic violence situation is, first of all, the most dangerous time is when the domestic violence victim leaves. It's the most dangerous time. The difficult thing is, is a lot of people don't leave because their abuser keeps things like passports and birth certificates and things so they can't access them, so they can't leave.

And so, we worked with this attorney to create Ashley Safepack and it was giving domestic violence victims this tool to use. And we've worked a lot with the local domestic violence shelter here in Tampa to tell Ashley's story to really help in any way we can with educating. We started a Facebook page very early on and mostly it was put together to find him, right, because he was missing, similar to what you see with the Gabby Petito, where they're looking and so they're using this as a vehicle. And so once he was found, it turned into a vehicle to allow us to continue the message about domestic violence awareness and education, especially in the month of October, several of us every day post educational material in there for everyone to see?

And there's a couple thousand or so members in that group. It's called Justice for Ashley Stop Domestic Violence. We just do everything that we can. I have spoken on many occasions at local schools and events as much as I can to just get her story out there because it can happen to anyone. I have had a couple of friends reach out ever since everything happened with my sister, either about their own situation or about a friend that has red flags in their relationship, and they have asked me my thoughts and my opinion, and for resources. I am honored to know that I can help and hopefully make a difference in other people's lives.

and help and hopefully make a difference in other people's lives. I hate that I know information about this, but at the same time, I'm glad that I do, because unfortunately, it's a very real thing in the world right now, and it's happening more and more often. So just me sharing what happened to my sister and what could happen, even if it didn't end the way that it did, what she went through and how much she changed because of everything that he did and said to her

and belittled her, to me, that's just enough to share with someone else, to hopefully help them, to never be in the same situation that she was in. I am thankful to know that I have the resources and I know what to look for and I'm able to share that with other people that maybe don't have the information that I have. I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss.

Thank you. How do you hope that others remember Ashley and how do you remember her? I hope that the girls remember her as an amazing mom because she is, she was such a great mom to them and she would have loved to see them now. So I of course, first and foremost, want to always remember her as the amazing mom that she was for the five years for the older one and the two years for the younger one. And then of course, I always want people to remember her as a positive person that always saw the best in people.

Even if that led to what happened to her, she still was trying to see the best in every situation and was trying to make the best of every situation. I just hope that everybody always remembers that she isn't who she became. She is the person that she was before him and she tried to be that person through and through. He just didn't allow it. So I want everybody to always know that she still was that positive person. No matter what was going on in her life, she would have loved to see her girls grow up, and I would have loved for her to meet her nephew that I now have that she was not able to meet,

and he was not able to meet her. Ashley was, oh gosh. She was just so beautiful, and I'm not just talking about physically. She was physically beautiful. She was tall, blonde, hair, green-eyed. She was just so beautiful, and I'm not just talking about physically. She was physically beautiful. She was tall, blonde hair, green eyes. She was beautiful, but she had such a beautiful spirit about her, such a beautiful heart. She wanted to be a teacher.

She had just finished getting her associate's degree before he moved them to California. In fact, she had just gotten accepted to University of South Florida to finish her education degree. And of course, they moved. And so she wasn't able to finish pursuing that. But she loved children in high school. She wanted to work with the Best Bodies program, which is with kids with special needs. She participated in their prom, creating a prom opportunity for them. She just had such a great heart. And she was just so full of life and love. She brightened her room. When she was little, we would go to amusement parks or whatever.

And I remember she would always widen up her hands and hear, is actually she just was such a performer, she was a dancer, she was just beautiful in every way, she was a great daughter, she was a good sister, she was just so beautiful and full of life. That's probably what crushed us the most was, is as we watched through this process of him slowly tearing down her self-esteem was, is that we always made the mention that he had stripped her of everything Ashley, to where he had taken away all of those that joy that she had been exuded from her life. And that was about, she saw such good in everyone and she wanted to fix him because of who she was.

She just could not see the evil in him. One of the things that when I speak about domestic violence is it's really important that as supporters to a domestic violence victim is that we don't take their choices away. And if I could change anything, that would be one of the things I would change, is I felt like I was telling her what she needed to do versus letting her make those choices on her own. I think that's really important, is that a victim needs to make those choices

because their abusers already taken away their choices. They don't need anybody else to do that. And I do believe that she felt she was making her own choices in those last few weeks of her life, and so that was not in vain. And it saddens me that she didn't get to continue to spend her life with her girls, but I do believe that she was doing what she needed to do for Ashley and for her girls by being as strong as she was in the end. I remember those last three weeks of her life when she had finally gotten her apartment. I remember telling my son, I think we have Ashley back because they would say,

do you think she's left for the last time this time? And I said, I think she has. I hear Ashley again. I hear her making plans for the future. I hear the joy and her voice and I do believe that before he killed her, she got her back again. Thank you so much for taking the time and energy to share Ashley's story and your story with us. I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss. Thank you. If you or someone you know is experiencing interpersonal violence, please reach out for help. The domestic violence hotline offers free and confidential support 24-7 at 1-800-799 SAFE. Or text start to 8-8-7-8-8, or chat with someone confidentially at thehotline.org.

Thank you so much for listening. Stay safe, friends. Something was wrong is an audio chuck production created and hosted by Tiffany Reese. Our theme song was originally composed by Gladrags, covered this season by Kenna and the kings. You don't know anybody You don't know anybody Really you talk to someone So what do you think Chuck? Do you approve? Duh!

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