Sounds Like A Cult - The Cult of Bachelorette Parties

Episode Date: October 3, 2023

The Cult of Bachelorette Parties is one we have all been a part of, whether from an observational distance or as a member yourself, this cult spares no one. This week, Isa is joined by a very special ...guest: comedian, host of Giggly Squad and Berner Phone Podcasts, and once a bachelorette herself, the hilarious Hannah Berner (@hannahberner). Tune in as they chat about how culty Hannah’s bachelorette party really got – we’re talking rituals, us vs them dynamics, exploitation, isolation from society and of course one ultra charismatic leader. But are Bachelorette parties a live your life, watch your back, or a get the f*ck out level cult? Follow us on IG @soundslikeacultpod @isaamedinaa @amanda_montell Thank you to our sponsors! Go to DipseaStories.com/cult for an extended 30 day free trial  Go to RocketMoney.com/slac to manage your money the easy way  Go to Zocdoc.com/CULT and download the Zocdoc app for FREE

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 ZockDock is a free app. You can find amazing doctors and book appointments online. With thousands of top-rated patient-reviewed doctors and specialists, you can filter specifically for ones who take your insurance, are located near you, and treat almost any condition you're searching for. Go to zock.com slash cult and download the ZockDock app for free. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. That's zoc.coc.com slash cult. ZockDock.com slash cult. Thank you to our sponsor RocketMoney. to going to rocket money dot com slash S L A C. That's rocket money dot com slash S L A C.
Starting point is 00:00:46 Rocket money dot com slash S L A C. Thank you to our sponsor Dipsy. Dipsy is an app full of hundreds of short sexy audio stories designed by women for women. For listeners of the show, Dipsy is offering an extended 30 day free trial when you go to Dipsy Stories dot com slash cult. That's 30 days of full access for free when you go to DipsyStories.com slash cult. That's 30 days of full access for free when you go to D-I-P-S-E-A Stories.com slash cult. DipsyStories.com slash cult. The views expressed on this episode, as with all episodes of Sounds Like a Cult,
Starting point is 00:01:15 are solely host opinions and quoted allegations. The content here should not be taken as indisputable facts. This podcast is for entertainment purposes only. You have to do themes because it's not a cult as indisputable facts, this that is very... Boat? Yes, so you did. The line tour of the South. This is Sounds Like a Cult, a show about the modern day cults. We all follow. I'm Yisimadina and I'm a comedian touring all over the country. I'm Amanda Montel, author of the book Cultish the Language of Fanaticism. Every week on our show, we discuss a different fanatical friend group from the cultural zeitgeist,
Starting point is 00:02:04 from corporate America to Coachella, to try and answer the big question. This group sounds like we call me, Lisa here, but with a very special guest, a Bachelorette party icon, you could even say expert. We're going to be talking about all the intricate cultishness of Bachelorette parties. From the authoritarian control held by the bride and even the bridesmaid at times, to the isolation from society, the extremist beliefs, and even the brides made at times, to the isolation from society, the extremist beliefs, and even the classic and most upheld practice of worshipping a chosen single individual.
Starting point is 00:02:52 All with the mutually shared higher purpose of celebrating the spiritual connection and ceremony that is literal marriage. She's a wife, she's a comedian, she is the co-host of the Giggly Squad podcast and Burnerphone podcast, the icon Hannah Burner. I'm so honored to be on this pod because, like, not only my obsessed with cults, like, I'm a big documentary girlie. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:21 I used to watch reality TV and then I learned too much about it. So now I'm into, like, I want the real stuff. Even the documentaries are still biased. And documentaries, I like the disturbing stuff. And sometimes I'm not in the mood for like tons of murder. And a cult is like that nice balance of like not too much violence. That's what we always say. It's like especially when we cover like the everyday cults we all follow. It's like, okay, our bachelor at parties really a cult. I mean, we're gonna talk about it, but they are. They are. And if you think they're not, you're part of the cult. Yeah, and you've been to too many. And you've blacked out so much on your wine tours that your long and short-term memory is suffering. I think in past life, I was
Starting point is 00:03:59 like an occult. Yeah, because I don't like, I've never smoked a cigarette. I mean, cigarettes are cults. Ever? Because I'm afraid of myself. Oh my god. Like, I'm't like I've never smoked a cigarette. I mean cigarettes are cold ever Because I'm afraid of myself. Oh my gosh like I'm like never done coke so I'm like in that way I did it once and I Do coke one so we did it once as a joke and I got it No, it's because I'm literally so pure No, cuz I I really think my body's like you did bad things in your past and you're supposed to be like a clean little angel Do not drink alcohol either. I'm just more of an eater. Okay, like I'll drink and I'm like, okay I need to go to sleep. Yeah. Yeah, alcohol makes me sleepy too. Unless it's like a espresso martini
Starting point is 00:04:36 Then I'm like that's my cocaine. Oh, I spressed so my team is a cult Okay, so I want to ask you as a married woman. Oh, yeah It's so off-brand for me and it's so choo-ge. I feel like you never talk about being married either. And I just say it's the least interesting thing about me. But I'm angry. I also... It's I hate your husband.
Starting point is 00:04:55 I do great podcasts with my husband. I love him to death. I just... You know what? I feel like getting an marriage has like, it's nice, like, I have this teammate, but then I get to like, worry about other things all day. I was literally thinking about that. Because I was so boy crazy when I was single,
Starting point is 00:05:10 and I'm like, oh, okay, I could worry about other things. I was thinking about that on my walk here. Really? Because I am bisexual, which is even more of a problem for me because I'm thinking about men and women. No. And I'm single, so I want to be married. And then with the girls, you can't tell if girls are,
Starting point is 00:05:26 I mean, maybe you're better, but you can't tell if girls are flirting with you or they're like, are we just like, so-mates? It's a miracle that I like send an email a day. Yeah, people think that bisexual people means they're like, fucking everyone when I feel like, waste bisexuality a cult. Yeah, okay.
Starting point is 00:05:40 I prefer. I mean, it's more of the gruelage. It's more of the larger cult with the LGBTQ community. True, there's,'s more like the larger cult with the LGBTQ community. True, it's like the Scientology of the LGBT community. It really is. Okay, but actually, least interesting thing about you
Starting point is 00:05:54 is that you're married. Yeah. But you are married. I am married, but I'm married to an older man, which I think is like important to contextually, that like he's like older, he's tired, he's had a lot of experience.
Starting point is 00:06:07 I really respect his mind, I respect his personality, I respect him most. That's very biosexually. So gay of me. Yeah, literally I am in a gay relationship. Yeah, you are. Cause he an older man, you're dating a lesbian. He's like a young woman.
Starting point is 00:06:20 Yeah. Yeah. He's dating a hot younger woman and I'm obsessed. And you know, he's also like, he's a comedian, so we're very emotionally bonded. So yeah, I do have a husband. And I remember being very wary of the whole wedding process because it is very culty.
Starting point is 00:06:39 Yeah. Like the second you get engaged immediately, like all these societal norms are thrust upon you, and you have to decide if you're being a badass and not having a bridal shower. You're so crazy, because you're not having a bridal shower. And I'm like, what is a bridal shower? What is a bridal shower, actually?
Starting point is 00:06:58 I guess it's like, it's as someone who doesn't, I don't know. I don't like to party. I don't like party, like food. I like food. I think partying is like weird. When I was little, someone was telling me about us, someone like their career got off track
Starting point is 00:07:13 because they party too much. And I was like, how many birthday parties? Are you going to talk to me when my parents told me that like weed was gonna ruin my life once. And then my dad was like, in this household, you can drink beer, but if you ever smoke weed out on the street, and I like never smoked weed until I was like 23. No, my mom was like, if you smoke weed, you will be homeless and never succeed in life. It's like that mean girl's
Starting point is 00:07:36 thing. Yes. It's like you're gonna get pregnant and die. Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die. But ultimately, if I enjoyed alcohol more, I totally get it. Yeah. But also, I have social anxiety, like in group settings. I'm a huge people pleaser. Okay, like, did you have a bachelor at party? So this is where I'm like the biggest hypocrite in the world.
Starting point is 00:07:57 I did, and it was really fun. Okay, that's great. I at first was like, I'm not having a bachelor at party. I did not have bridesmaids, because bridesmaids, that's stressful. I also thought, in my life, I'm like, I'm not having a bachelor party. I did not have bridesmaids. Cause bridesmaids, that's stressful. I also thought in my life, I'm like, I'm never gonna be at a point where I'm like, how really? You know when you have certain years
Starting point is 00:08:13 where you have like a good group of friends, I'm like, what if you get married in one of those years that you're like transitional to your friend group, especially late 20s or early 30s? You start really weaning down. I actually got to a point where I was like, I always knew I wasn't gonna have bridesmaids because I also think the whole like asking people
Starting point is 00:08:28 to be a bridesmaid again. I joke on my standup that it's like, she asked the bride ask you to be part of something bigger than herself. So it starts where it's like, she's not asking you for a favor. She's asking you to be a part of something that you, it's larger than you, it's larger than her, it's the picture.
Starting point is 00:08:47 Yeah. It's spiritual, it's like ascendant into the next level of womanhood. And it's like other people have been doing it for years. Who are you to say no, it's not be a part of this indoctrination? Yeah, and then there's also the ritual of being like, I did it for you, you have to do it for me. No, literally, where you might not be as close to her
Starting point is 00:09:09 as she is to you, but she put it, there's all these like, call girl math. Yeah. Of like, love girl math. Also, there's this whole way of like how they ask, you know, sometimes they'll ask you with like a very fancy gift. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:22 There's like a range of that. So I was like, I'm not doing any of that stuff. But then in my head, I was like, I don't want people to think I'm a loser. And I told a couple of my friends, like, I'm not doing bridesmaids. And they were like, but you're having a bunch of ret. And I guess I put hard to get.
Starting point is 00:09:34 I was like, I don't need that. But I was at a point in my life where I was like, going through some stuff where I was like, it would feel nice to be celebrating, like, the people in my life who I love that aren't men. I feel like you are give it like I feel like you feel so bad that you had a vatularette party. No I'm giving excuses. I'm so defensive about it. It's okay. No I said so my I was like that's how you know it's a cult because you're like, no, the only reason I even joined was because I was going through
Starting point is 00:10:05 a hard time. That's why you're never in a good state of mind when you make a decision to join a cult. I was in a dark place and like a healthy Hannah would probably be like, we don't need to do this, we don't need to make all your friends. It was an ego thing. Yeah, I admit it. It was an ego thing. And batched reds and cults are all based on the leader having a huge ego. So many things are an ego thing these days. Literally, I blame my ego for everything. I'm like, sorry, ego girl. I do think, also, as I said before, I don't like departing and I don't know how myself
Starting point is 00:10:36 to have fun. Me having fun is other people having fun. Yeah. Like, me having fun is me doing nothing. So when I'm forced to do something, it means the people around me have to be having fun, or I'm like, I don't want to be here. So did you end up planning your own Bachelorette party because you didn't have a bridal party
Starting point is 00:10:50 so you didn't have a maid of honor either? No, so I had a couple of my friends like bothering me like, what are we gonna do? So I was like, okay, what's fun for me? What's fun for me would be me inviting my like, girly best friends to go like, upstate New York to a farm and watching them try to put cute outfits on and like feed animals.
Starting point is 00:11:11 Like that's fun for me. I like animals. I like like, people being uncomfortable. As even though I said I want am a people pleaser, but I thought it would be funny for everyone to experience that together. So it was just me pranking my friends. Okay, and my friends were like, no.
Starting point is 00:11:27 Because I'm like, I'm not gonna plan it. They were like, we're not doing that. And they go, can we just give you the classic Miami Batcharet? And you did it. And I was like, now you guys are pranking me. I like the way that you're talking about it. You're like, you're like, it was a bit. No, it wasn't.
Starting point is 00:11:44 I was committed to it. We went to Miami, it was a bit. No, it wasn't. It was committed to. We went to Miami as a bit. And I did the whole, like, we have to do themes. Yeah. You have to do themes because it's not a cult unless everyone's wearing the same kind of outfits. You have rituals. Yes.
Starting point is 00:11:58 Plant activities. Yes. Boosey brunch. Yes. Strip club. Yes. Penis straws. Yes.
Starting point is 00:12:04 Wine tour? No, because we were in Miami, but that is very like North Park boat. Yes. Penis draws. Yes. Wine tour? No, because we were in Miami, but that is very like north part boat. Yes. So you did the wine tour of the South. I always say, then you know the like trolley, when you're like all drinking on the trolley thing in the South, I say that's like Peloton of the South.
Starting point is 00:12:20 But you all have to wear the same things. And then the best, the real cult part of it is that like everyone's communicating with each other, right? Yeah. And if someone steps out a line and goes like, is this like a little too late to be out, or is this a little expensive, or like, I don't really like this color that we have to wear?
Starting point is 00:12:40 Someone goes, are you not supporting the bride? Yes. Are you making this about you? When this is about the bigger purpose, which is Hannah's love with Desmond? Do you not support Hannah? And then you go, no, no, no, I'm here. And you go right back, I'm so supportive.
Starting point is 00:12:56 And then you're like competing. Everyone starts competing for the bride to support you. No, there literally be like, I will sit on my hand and knees and be a human chair, sit there. And my butt's red, it was like a little different because at one point, it was a bit. It wasn't, it wasn't a bit. And at one point, like everyone's talking to each other
Starting point is 00:13:12 and no one was talking to me. And I was like, I love that. And like, these are friends from different, like I had my college friends, my tennis friends, and podcasting friends, comedian friends, really TV friends. And they all were loving each other. It was like so incredible.
Starting point is 00:13:24 But then I was like, what about me? So they were kind of, honestly, a lot of them would have been human sacrifice. Yeah. It was a real cult. I'm like, hold on a second. I'm like, no, yeah, continue. Actually, my wedding aesthetic was kind of human sacrifice. What I was going to ask, what do you think is like the bachelor
Starting point is 00:13:44 ret version of human sacrifice? Oh, that's ask, what do you think is like the bachelor rep version of human sacrifice? Oh, that's when you go, you have to go home. Like, we're not friends anymore, we're blocking you, you're not gonna be tagged in any of the photos. And we're not gonna edit your face, and we'll edit everyone else's face. Oh, but it's also like everyone bonding. Like, you know when someone is going
Starting point is 00:14:03 against the cult, you have to, everyone has to turn. Yeah. Like, everyone has to agree. Like, Stephanie is like ringing down the vibe. Yeah. She's like not supporting Hannah. Yeah. And like, we cannot be her friend anymore.
Starting point is 00:14:16 So that supports like multiple cult theories, which is like, there's the exit costs. Mm-hmm. And exploitation, like, if you're not agreeing to like the financial exploitation and the physical exploitation because a bachelor at party can't happen in the city that you live in, you literally have to be physically isolated from the rest of your support system. Yeah. You feel like you haven't talked to your parents in years.
Starting point is 00:14:36 Yeah. Like your family, your friends, you're dehydrated, you're scared, you haven't slept, you haven't drank water. And to your point, like if one girl disagrees with you, what are you going to go back to the hotel alone? No one else to go to. You have no support. And I do think you have to really listen to what the bride says if the bride's hungry were eating. I remember at one point, I was like,
Starting point is 00:14:56 I'm going to the pool and it was like 11 a.m. You're crazy, girl. I was like, I'm going to the pool. So I go to the pool with the two girls that I was in the room with. And then they were like, where the fuck is everyone else? I'm like, it's fine. And they were like, Hannah's at the pool.
Starting point is 00:15:13 We all have to support Hannah at the pool. And then girls came at like four PM because they were like exhausted and tired. And they were like literally gossiping within each other. I didn't even have to say anything. They were like, so Paige is just gonna like stay in the room while Hannah's at the pool all day. Like, I didn't even have to say anything. They were like, so Paige is just gonna like stay in the room.
Starting point is 00:15:25 I'll like hang out at the pool all day. Like, you should not support Hannah. Like, we're like, I wasn't like that. You didn't care. Cults, you need a little drama for the cult to feel important. Like, you have to feel like you're chosen or you're not chosen. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:37 So I do feel like all bridal parties have a person that everyone hates. Yes. And also, that makes me wonder, okay, so since you didn't have a made of honor You didn't have one right so there was fighting. I was going to say but like I liked the invisible tension of like You like this. Who's stepping up who's stepping up? There was a one girl who you be like I'm gonna go to the pool
Starting point is 00:16:00 And then like everything like burning behind you and be like, let's see who steps up to the plate. No, but I also was put, definitely for sure, playing mind games. Like I'd be alone with someone I'd be like, you've been so amazing this trip and you could tell that they were like so happy. And then like 10 seconds later, I'd pull someone else's side
Starting point is 00:16:17 and I'd be like, you were like such a good friend. Like they felt like they were the only one I was saying you were the best friend. You are a charismatic leader. No, I'm like such a charismatic leader. And that's what cult leaders make. I call myself fearless leader. You are fearless leader.
Starting point is 00:16:31 Charismatic leader. And that's Emily O. Oh, I'm Leo Rising, but it pices. And I'm a Scorpio rising. Why do Scorpios like again? Evil. Okay. They're like dark sarcastic, like,
Starting point is 00:16:45 but at least self-aware. Yes, very self-aware. And Virgo, so I was organized enough to like, get it done. I definitely, like, basically there's nothing you can do wrong as the right. Yeah, well, that's what I was gonna say is like, really quickly before you tell me what happened, what transpired on that pool deck.
Starting point is 00:17:05 I wanna say that cult leaders are really good at giving everyone individual attention. Like literally what you just said is so culty going to each single person and making them feel like the most special person in the world. And that's when you know. And then taking the tension away. Yeah, because then you're like suffocating them
Starting point is 00:17:23 from that attention they want more. Think about it, it's just grow math suffocating them from that attention. No, because more think about it It's just grow math. I'm getting attention from everyone. Yeah, so when I decide so no one can get my full attention So when I do decide to give one person the full attention They feel so honored in that moment and they will I could literally Like someone will be they will come off to me to complain about people They're like I there was like drama that I didn't know about and later on they were like Oh, there was like a little drama that happened,
Starting point is 00:17:46 but like, don't worry, we settled it, but like, just want to let you know. It's like in reality TV shows. It's like on the bachelor, where they go to the bachelor, because they won't play. Can I pull you aside? No, it was literally like that.
Starting point is 00:17:56 Bonus points for letting you know that not only did it happen, and I didn't bother you with the drama, I fixed it for you. This was the first time ever, because normally in a friend group, like, I actually don't like with the drama, I fixed it for you. This was the first time ever, because normally in a friend group, like, I actually don't like being the drama, but I'm fully always like popcorn aware of it,
Starting point is 00:18:10 even instigating it, then leaving. Like, I'm never the actual drama. But I'll like, I'll drop a line and leave. I'll be like, how'd you like it? You're there for the fun. I'm there for the, I'm there. Like, I want to feel alive, you know? But this was the first time ever
Starting point is 00:18:21 where people were hiding any possible thing that could possibly ruin the trip for me when I actually, it backfired because I was like, wait, all those happening and you guys didn't tell me? And you like that. I want to know what's going on. I want to be in the drama, but they were like, we did not want to upset you. I was like, one of it?
Starting point is 00:18:38 I've ever been upset. And then that's when you got upset. And then I'm like, now I'm like, you guys have a little fucking, you're having a little fun behind my back. You're having a drama circle jerk. But it's also as a comedian are, I'm very into earned attention. I want you to go on stage,
Starting point is 00:18:51 people are like, who is this bitch? And then I earn it. And if I don't, I say, you know what, that's fine. I'll do better next time. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:58 Where as a bride, you're just like given this attention when you actually haven't done shit, but known these people. But fall in love. We fall in love with a guy with a lesbian. With a lesbian man. He's like so handsome and like more beautiful than me.
Starting point is 00:19:15 That's why I'm laughing. Yeah. If Ellen DeGeneres was like really hot and like had a good personality. Cause he's like, he's the silver fox. No, hot. I've seen him. He's an attractive man.
Starting point is 00:19:24 I'm gonna thank you beautiful cheekbones. So I remember's like, he's the silver fox. No, hot. I've seen him. He's an attractive man. I'm gonna thank you, beautiful cheekbones. So I remember being like, we're wearing feathers tonight. And I remember the joy of seeing everyone like, listen to me perfectly, as they were in my room when I was like, I created this. You come out, you're like, we're wearing feathers. They're like, we have to have feathers. And like all these people who are honestly like,
Starting point is 00:19:43 very important have really good jobs. jobs like from all walks of life, but just like friends who are busy. Yeah. The fact that they took four days out of their life to spend money and time with me, I guess is like the gift, but it's like abusive. Yes, but actually going back to the fact that you didn't have a maid of honor,
Starting point is 00:20:00 I think it was actually smarter because then they're all equally trying to gain your attention. Also, I had more power. You had more power and also... But I had to do more dirty work. I didn't have that number one person to do it for me, but you're right.
Starting point is 00:20:12 They kept each other and... Yeah. It also was a really good number. It was like, I think it was like seven or eight. I was going to say seven. I was going to say seven. It wasn't too little. It was the perfect amount where we felt like, we felt really powerful.
Starting point is 00:20:26 Yeah. I do have to say, we were untouchable. We went to a strip club and we told the bouncers, we're like, if any men come in this direction, close on them. This is like a female commune. We were calling it a female commune. That's a cold, cold, cold.
Starting point is 00:20:38 A commune is cold for a cold. Yeah. It's, and that's literally, that's us versus them. Yes, it was so us versus them. Yes, it was so awesome. Like you guys walk into this club wearing feathers. He's caulking, he caulking for everyone, but you're like, come near me and you're burned to the ground. But also where I came, like I was the leader, the one thing that I was a cunt about, the
Starting point is 00:21:01 one thing I wanted was no one else wear white. And I don't know why out of all the marriage rules, like everything, I was like, just let me be the one wearing white. And remember this one of them walked in with like the lightest, lightest blue. Like it was white with a blue tone. Yeah. And people were like,
Starting point is 00:21:17 Man, is it we ever change? That's a good question. And I was like, let's hear what she has to say. Because this is a democracy. No, it's not. I'm in charge. But it's make her feel. And then my other friend, Sierra, who I will name by name,
Starting point is 00:21:31 she wore this like, like white chain type thing over her bathing suit. Paige also walked in with like a white thing. Like, this is three out of seven. That was three out of seven. They were coming for my third card. This is Code Red. She came with, so obviously when she got to the pool,
Starting point is 00:21:50 she not only was late, page, dyso pro. She was late to the pool and the camera. And then showed up with a color bathing suit, but the over, what's it called? A cover-up. Cover-up. I'm like bathing suit cover-up. I'm like, what's the thing?
Starting point is 00:22:03 Cover-up. Cover-up. Cover-up. No idea. The bathing suit cover what's the difference? Cover up. Cover up. Cover up. Cover up. I'm like, what's the difference? Cover up. I'm like, what's the difference? Cover up.
Starting point is 00:22:11 Cover up. I'm like, what's the difference? Cover up. I'm like, what's the difference? Cover up. I'm like, what's the difference? Cover up. I'm like, what's the difference?
Starting point is 00:22:19 Cover up. I'm like, what's the difference? Cover up. I'm like, what's the difference? Cover up. Cover up. I'm like, what's the difference? Cover up.
Starting point is 00:22:27 Cover up. I'm like, what's the difference? Cover up. Cover up. Cover up., they were just expecting my power at some point, but I think they're testing. Some people are gonna test the leader. And which is healthy. It's healthy and you know what, Paige was powerful. She did pay for the table that night at 11. So she was, you know, she had her power.
Starting point is 00:22:37 Another girl did more of the logistics planning. She had her, everyone had a role that they really loved. But I remember them, they were naughty, but that's, I remember them in a cult that really loved. But I remember them, they were naughty. But that's, I remember them and Nicole, that will happen. And I put them in their place. I definitely put them in my place where I said, I see what you did, acknowledge it. And I'm okay.
Starting point is 00:22:54 Just don't do that again. That's so cool to me. The fact that you immediately forgave them, but acknowledge the fact that they gave, that they made a mistake. And there was a threat. And you like subtle threat. You look them in the eyes.
Starting point is 00:23:09 And also, and you like are like, I forgive you. I had other people bring it up too. Like they went up to her being like, page your wing, a white cover up. And then by the time it got to me, I was like the forgiveness one. That's wild.
Starting point is 00:23:22 Was there anything fun in terms of rituals that you made people do because they were like naughty? Like did you have someone get like, and sorry, then I used the word naughty that was disgusting. It's okay. Like they broke the rules. So they're like, there are a lot of plastic ones. Like this scavenger hunt, which I was like, absolutely much admin. Like I'm not coming up with a list.
Starting point is 00:23:44 The real rituals were, every day I had a strict, strict theme that we all had to wear. Yeah. Also, and you would come up with it in the morning. And go figure that out. I just like keep having this visual of you, like waking up and being like feathers. I'm going to the pool.
Starting point is 00:24:07 You're welcome. I'm really, really happy. The emails before and two, like it's literally like you have to decode it to figure out what's going on. Yeah. There's so many emails. We did not do the group chat,
Starting point is 00:24:18 because group chat with Bachelorette's are in Nightmare, because some people are trying to be funny in it. Other people are like, where are the facts? I was a terrible Bachelorette's, are in Nightmare, because some people are trying to be funny in it. Other people are like, where are the facts? I was a terrible Bachelorette to one of my friends, even though she knew that I couldn't make a lot of the things, but like, I got so behind of the text messages, like I didn't even know, I went to the wedding,
Starting point is 00:24:37 didn't know that there was like a rehearsal, and people were just texting like, where are you know, I was just like sleeping in the hotel. And I was like, if there's not a final email with all this stuff, I'm not gonna know. You know, Google, Cal, invite. So you had to like, you had to know things like subtly throughout to even be a part of it. Like it wasn't.
Starting point is 00:24:54 It's almost like Coltie to be like, there's secrets within the text. Oh, it totally, it's like very Coltie that like you're not only like fully involved on that weekend, but like leading up to the weekend if you want to know all the details of the events, you have to, it's 24-7 attention. I got JFL new faces, which two years ago, I'm a brag, which was why I couldn't make her better at it. And I like, I face time to her, I was sobbing, but I was like, I didn't think I was
Starting point is 00:25:17 going to get it. This is like, you can't say it. The first industry thing I've ever got in, and it's the weekend of your adventure. I'm so sorry. But that got me behind in all the rituals to the point that I was demoted for sure. Yeah, for sure. But did they remove you from the group chat? No, but it was a way that I couldn't keep up. I didn't know all the inside jokes after the weekend.
Starting point is 00:25:40 Okay, it was like, oh, so he did that again. And I'm like, again, when did she do that? What did she do? What did she do? What did she do? No, no, no, no. So it was kind of like an ex communication in like a personal way. Like it's like, and they all look at each other,
Starting point is 00:25:53 do the joke, do they only make you feel uncomfortable on purpose? Do you think? No, but you put it on to yourself. You're like, I don't deserve to be like in on this joke because I was not there when I should have. Also, you always order these like, these dresses that have to be like in on this joke, because I was not there when I should have. Also, you always order these dresses that have to be the same. This was for my friend who's more culty than me,
Starting point is 00:26:11 who actually was on my bad charrette. So it was also like, I owed her from my bad charrette. So when I didn't come, it was like, I mean, she was great about it, but I internalized, of course. As you should. And we all had order the same dress and same color. And I was like, I'm not going to fuck this up.
Starting point is 00:26:27 And I order, I'm like a size six. Like I used to do fit modeling, which if people don't know what that is, it's like, I have pretty, I have a very average ratio of my body where like, you could design something on like my shoulders to my waist to my, it's very like normal. Yeah. So I can order a size all over. I'm a bragg. I have a perfectly normal body.
Starting point is 00:26:44 I have a perfectly normal body. I'm a very average body guy. So if I order a six, normally it fits me. Yeah. So I order a six. The day before, it won't get over my ass. Like, there's no stretch. So I had to go in in that morning.
Starting point is 00:26:56 Like, I was almost, if I couldn't fit into that dress, I told my husband I was like, I'm not going to be part of the party. If I can't get this over my butt. Yeah. And he's like, you should try and mark that two moment. Yeah. Putting on the Maryland Monroe dress. I just be part of the party. If I can't get this over my butt. Yeah. And he's like, you should try to not be at the moment. Yeah. Putting on the Maryland Monroe dress. I just ripped it in the back.
Starting point is 00:27:09 But at that point, I said, I was not going to be able to be a part of this ceremony. If I cannot get this, like, what was going on your dress? I was like, she's not going to, if I've ever given me for this. And this is over, like, going to punish myself. She dressed that I ordered that, like, is a weird size that I should have tried out. And it's over like an punish myself. She dressed that I ordered that like is a weird size that I should have tried out. And it's
Starting point is 00:27:26 totally out of your control. And I'm like control but people would say if you cared about her, you would have tried it on before the way. And that's like the deeper purpose of being like, oh, you're asked, can't fit in this dress. You hate that she's in love. You hate that she's in love and you've actually always been jealous of her.
Starting point is 00:27:50 I am. Have you ever been on the hunt for a new doctor? And you ask literally everyone you know for their recommendation. You know, like a doctor who actually gets you and listens to you and makes sure you feel super comfortable. And finally, after weeks of searching, you find the one, but they don't have any appointments available. Literally happens to me all the time.
Starting point is 00:28:17 ZockDock is an amazing website where you can find and book a top-rated doctor and make sure that they take your insurance. ZockDock is an amazing website where you can find and book a top-rated doctor. The average way time to see a doctor book on ZockDock is between just 24 and 48 hours. That's it, you can even score same-day appointments. Once you find the doc you want,
Starting point is 00:28:41 you can book them immediately with just a few app taps. No more waiting awkwardly on hold with a receptionist. Go to zock.com slash cult and download the zock.app for free. Then find and book a top rated doctor today. That's zoc.coc.com slash cult. zock.com slash cult. Are your subscriptions draining your wallet? I know mine are.
Starting point is 00:29:04 Do you know the average person has around 12 paid subscriptions and they might not even remember subscribing to half of those? If you have no idea just how much you're spending each month, you need rocket money. It's this great app that tracks all of your expenses so you know exactly where your money is going. Rocket money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps you lower your bills all in one place. Rocket money does all the work for you. With over 3 million users and counting, Rocket money customers have saved an average of $720 a year. I discovered I had countless subscriptions that I didn't know I subscribed to. I discovered I had countless subscriptions
Starting point is 00:29:45 that I didn't know I subscribed to. I mean, mostly TV streaming services that I signed up for because I wanted a 30 day free trial and then completely forgot. And now I'm saving a lot of money. Stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and manage your money the easy way
Starting point is 00:30:02 by going to rocketm dot com slash slack. That's rocket money dot com slash slac rocket money dot com slash slack. Whether you're lounging by the pool or soaking up the sun in your own backyard or stuck in a long commute, Dipsy stories is your passport to a world of sun kissed adventures and unforgettable encounters. This fall, Dipsy is an app full of hundreds of short, sexy audio stories designed by women for women. They bring scenarios to life with immersive soundscapes and realistic characters, discover stories
Starting point is 00:30:34 about second-chance romances, adventurous vacation flings, and hot and heavy hookups. You can also find really amazing sleep stories and wellness sessions in the app, along with sexy written stories to read. Let Dipsy be your go-to place to spice up your me time, explore your fantasies, relax and unwind, or even heat things up with a partner. I love their sleeping meditations.
Starting point is 00:31:01 I use them when I can't sleep, or I've had a really long day. There's one in particular that has a really great breathing exercise. I would definitely recommend this app to literally anyone. It's an amazing app. And for listeners of the show, Dipsy is offering an extended 30-day free trial when you go to DipsyStories.com slash cult. That's 30 days of full access I do think because my vibe overall is very like de-center men from your life. My bachelor at party was this like honestly really beautiful celebration of friendship. And my friends are so conty that like they did not give me the power that I wanted and I kind of liked that. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:04 Like they literally were like, there was a constant power struggle. Like at one point I was like, I don't like that you two were like best, I'm like do you know that you are getting along so well this weekend because of me? Like you wouldn't even know each other. Like texting each other after they had like, I'm like who are you face timing?
Starting point is 00:32:16 No. My friend from college. But I like it because then I could use it against them later and be like, oh you two have plans, you wouldn't even have plans it wasn't for me. So I like that, but people are not sucking up to me. But that's like not, I mean, you could tell by the fact
Starting point is 00:32:28 that three out of seven are white. I lost control. You lost control. I was controlling. I lost control. But your mind games were not working. It was working. And also, because I was in, honestly,
Starting point is 00:32:42 Paige is like, if I'm gonna go, I'm throwing my my dream batch red. Okay, so Paige, like we went to 11. Is she married? No, I'm okay. We went to 11, which is like, I don't go to clubs. Yeah. I threw up like I was in high school,
Starting point is 00:32:54 like knees on the tile floor, like holding some random girls hand next to you and she's like, you're amazing, you're gonna get through this. It's giving ends justify the means, like you had to do it. And that's because there was a purpose behind your suffering. There was a reason. Like you had to do it. Yes. I was part of the traditions
Starting point is 00:33:15 and it we were all emptied. Like you're empty. You're not who you are on this trip. And I remember this is besides the point but like Zhao Ja Rule showed up at the club. Yeah. And Ja Rule for especially white millennial women is our cult leader. Yeah. So when he walked in the room, we were like, oh, praise, praise Ja Rule.
Starting point is 00:33:38 Like my first MTV video was Ja Rule. Yeah. So we're like all singing to Ja Rule. And that was like beautiful in the the next day some people had left early and it was very like, oh you missed Jarl Rule. How was it worth it? So it was like competitive in that way. And you and they wanted to make them
Starting point is 00:33:54 almost like feel bad. And it's like you left because you didn't love Hannah and the people who loved Hannah stayed and got to see Jarl Rule. And as a reward, God gave them Jarl Rule. God gave them Jarl Rule. It was God because God controls love and this friend group. Whenever John rule shows up at a match,
Starting point is 00:34:09 a match, a match against his wings. Yes, exactly. And then we did the classic yacht. And that's another ritual that, as we said, is like the yacht is the Miami version of the bus wine court. Because people got a little moody where it was like, they got a little tired, and they're like, what are we gonna do?
Starting point is 00:34:28 What are we gonna do? And I'm like, we have a boat day planned. If you guys don't wanna do it, we don't have to do it. And they're like, it'd better be like a fucking nice boat. Like I was getting some attitude. Like, I'm not bringing you on a kayak, but I actually didn't know if boat was gonna be good. It was.
Starting point is 00:34:40 I'm not good at that stuff. Turns out, was a great boat. Yeah, was this, okay, important question. Was the boat after the club? So it was the day after the club. Yes. And so you all were exhausted. Exhausted and we were like,
Starting point is 00:34:56 a five-day club on your knees throwing up the night before. Literally, so they got me all fancy. And then I remember we all had to go to the boat and once we were on the boat, you just, you get this like communal. Something about a boat makes you feel, you can't get out, you can't run out. You are isolated, you have limited resources,
Starting point is 00:35:17 you really have to like find an ally and not say. So people started to find allies for sure at that point. And then there is also a hierarchy that's starting to build below me because we had a photographer at our bachelor's. Which I highly recommend. But like at one point we're on the boat and I was like, where's Paige?
Starting point is 00:35:35 You know, like problematic Paige. She wore white yesterday. Who was my page? Who was my page? She's at the front of the boat. Taking pictures. With my photographer doing like a full solo photo shoot. Of course.
Starting point is 00:35:46 So we're all laughing. Paige has like gotten this role. And it's consistent. And at least we know what it is. Do you think that it's she, the one who got you the glam so that she could also get glam? Yes. I saw that coming.
Starting point is 00:35:59 And she also got the table. But again, there was kind of a hierarchy because she is like my best friend. Yeah. Such podcast host. So it was funny, but I, there was kind of a hierarchy because she is like my best friend. Yeah. Such podcast host. Yeah. So it was funny, but I, other people were like, oh, we want that.
Starting point is 00:36:10 So there was that thing of like, we want to show that we had fun in this group through the quality of the photos. Because again, it's like this us versus them that there's like inter cult dynamics of like you and your friends. Yes. But then you, on the larger cult of social media,
Starting point is 00:36:27 wanna show everyone that they wanna be a part of your group. And then we went on Kiki's on the river. What's that? That is this restaurant on the water. Is he park? Yeah. And I think Paige said this up too. Is it, okay, so really quickly,
Starting point is 00:36:41 is like that area, like, gentrified by like, Bachelorette parties, like, were gentrified by Bachelorette parties? Were you guys the only Bachelorette party or is that a traditional thing? I think it's a traditional thing because there was a Bachelorette party there. It's a kind of thing where you eat and they have seafood towers, which are very aggressive. And showbodies. I had the seafood tower in front of me because I'm the cult leader. And then at the end, everyone, they take the food away.
Starting point is 00:37:06 And then you're supposed to stand on the tables with a white napkin and spin it. And if you weren't dancing with the people, it was like, what are you doing? Yeah. We're dancing on tables. We're dancing. Everyone did because once the cameras came out, they had to. It's like, oh, are you just no, are you gonna be like an out group person?
Starting point is 00:37:28 Like you're actually not invited to the dinner tonight. And it was very performative like celebration. At that point, do you think people were like going along with it because they were genuinely having fun or do you think there were some like characters who were kind of like playing into it because they were like, if I don't do this, I'll just have an even worse time. They're definitely is that time where,
Starting point is 00:37:49 I'll be honest, I would be that person that's like, are we gonna really fucking dance on the table? Yeah. But because it's for me, I'm like, this is the greatest thing ever. And I'm looking around and there are the girls who naturally would have been dancing on the table if it was my bad show or not.
Starting point is 00:38:01 And then there's the other ones who were like, mm-hmm, and they eventually left. But they were okay to leave. They just know that in the hierarchy, they're gonna get demoted when you get back. Demoted and possibly we'll get shit talked. And not tagged. Not tagged, not tagged.
Starting point is 00:38:18 You are not gonna be tagged in the content. And then my friend the last night, it was really hard for us all to go out. It was a struggle, but she got these juicy sweatsuits for everyone. That's amazing. Amazing. Okay, so you're literally, and my one's white, are there people wearing it? Four third day, how many days?
Starting point is 00:38:33 This is the third day. Third day of the college. And I highly recommend three as the max. Yes. You're doing four, you start. It will. And that's like how you see it escalating. It becomes Jones Town.
Starting point is 00:38:42 It becomes Jones Town, I think that's the four. Yeah, it's like just the feather. People aren't gonna make it. It's like at first it's just like a little accessory. Yep. And by the third day, you're all matching juicy sweatsuits. Yes, okay. So you're like a robot.
Starting point is 00:38:54 So we go to the sushi restaurant and like we can't even order drinks where that fucks. Like we're like so tired. But we all are at that point of like, one thing about is people give speeches, typically I joke that you have to give speeches about how great the bride is, and you run out of stories, and you're like, I joke. Typically I joke, that at my bachelor's. You have to. That was when people were kind of giving, like, this was such a great experience. This was so fun.
Starting point is 00:39:22 So people are starting to like, have lasted. So they're tapping into like their emotional side. Oh yeah, they're not thinking with logic. They're like starting to actually be like, I'm so thankful for this even though like, you spend a ton of money on me, you wasted your time on me, but you're somehow thinking me. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:36 And that's when I was like, this is working. And they're exhausted. So they could even get teary eyed in those speeches. Oh, for sure. Actually. Did nobody cry? Marcel those speeches. Oh, for sure. Actually, did nobody cry? My cello cried. Oh!
Starting point is 00:39:47 Marcello cried. The one guy on the chair cried, and it was so sweet and so beautiful. But like, he was, he had nothing left, and he was just like, you know, I love you. And like, we're hugging, you know. He's also like half an of everyone's size. So he's probably 10 times more exhausted
Starting point is 00:40:04 from the consumption. He couldn't keep up with the like the wine drunk. Yeah. He couldn't keep it up. But I remember acknowledging like you guys are tired and I'm gonna be nice and let you drink tea. Get your sushi. I remember someone had to go home like she was like I can't keep up and I was like like, I'm your mom. It's the same keep girl that keeps going home. No, this is different girl. But thank you for bringing that up though, because it was the same one. She's actually done.
Starting point is 00:40:31 You're not even allowed to fly back to the city where you're from. But that's so cool to be like, okay, yesterday I, you know, was the last one. I can't be the last one. Yeah. Hannibal notice. So we're leaving. And there's a car that stops. It's like a limo.
Starting point is 00:40:44 And it's like, do you guys want to get in the limo? And we say yes. And they were like, I'll be like, wait, a hundred bucks. To go, it's like, cause it is like a batch of rettown. Yeah. So they were like, we're just going back to the hotel. They're like, we'll drive for half an hour.
Starting point is 00:40:59 So we get in and we start playing these songs and we all start singing to these old 2000 songs together. And it was... Cool. Cool. It was cult coded. Because we were like, if you didn't know the words to the song, it was like,
Starting point is 00:41:12 how do you not look them up? You know how ludicrous? Oh, my, and it was like everyone is just chanting at the same time, doing heads like going out the windows. We were in, but it was like all these lights. Like we were all getting migraines, and it was just this beautiful moment
Starting point is 00:41:25 where I actually was like, we are one. And it was after the sentimental moment. Yes, so it's like whole weekend, you're going up, you're going up, you're going up, and then you're exhausted, and you have that like small crashing, juicy sled soon, where you get emotional, and then on the walk or on the drive back,
Starting point is 00:41:42 you have that final moment where you're like, church. Well, this is the creeds. It was Sunday. Yes, yes. Oh, Lord's Day. Yeah. And I was the Lord, but this was the craziest part where it really, it was such a successful batch of weekends. We get back to the hotel because I was basically like, we don't have to go out. Yeah. And they were like, we would like to invite you to Patiencee Era's room, which was like, they somehow got the big room. Okay. Um, I don't really like that. What, you didn't get the big room?
Starting point is 00:42:13 I don't know how it happened, but I've not got the big room, but that was my leg. Paige is giving cult leader. She is the cult leader. No, but the thing is, I was like, I'm that like sacrificial cult leader where people were like, oh, Hannah's sacrifice the big room. But like, I'm pleased with this. You did it. On purpose, yeah. Yes, I was a, I'm that like sacrificial cult leader where people were like, oh, Hannah's sacrifice the big room.
Starting point is 00:42:25 But like, I'm, I'm pleased. You didn't. On purpose. Yeah. It was a calculated move. It was like a, I was, I was sacrificing for my people. Yeah. Because I care about my people.
Starting point is 00:42:34 And they should remember that. And they remember that. So they say come to our room, a big room that you gifted us. Yeah. And let's just like, listen to music. And like, we don't want to say goodnight to each other yet. So we're all in this room, and we start playing church games.
Starting point is 00:42:48 Church games, what are church games? There's this one girl who went to church camp. Yeah, none of us else did. So she was like, wait, this feels familiar to me. So she's like, replaced church game where two people sit and try to come up with a word. And after that word, they have to come up with another word that reminds them that word.
Starting point is 00:43:07 It's the best game. It's the best game. Yeah, I love that game. Paige and I sit down, obviously me and my, you know, go call it. Yeah. And the second one, we got the same word, right? And it was this moment of like,
Starting point is 00:43:18 we are so connected in this moment of this experience. And we're just like drinking in the room and it was like, we were such, you were ascending like onto the next level. Yes. That was your ascendance. Yes. And we're wearing the same outfits and people were filming it.
Starting point is 00:43:33 And then the songs were coming and like everything encapsulated to like, we chose to be here. Yeah. We're in the beginning. It was like, people might have been like, oh, we were forced to be at Dinh Art 7. We're by the end.
Starting point is 00:43:43 We're like, we can't leave this room. We're so happy. I feel like that is a sign of a really good cult leader, because you had the perfect bachelor at party, which is, because I didn't have to bus anyone around, tell anyone to do a thing. I, you have to, as a cult leader, like you're so good at like, I mean,
Starting point is 00:44:02 I don't think a lot of things were there, idea. Exactly. And you give them enough rope to hang themselves, and they won't do it if they actually respect you. Yeah. Like I'm getting so into this right now. You're so colty. But you know what?
Starting point is 00:44:15 Not too awful, Boris. And maybe one day we'll do another episode of this. Yeah. It's because I come from college sports. Yeah. College sports is the ultimate cult. Or the ultimate cult. But the ultimate cult. I mean, sports in general, like being part of a team,
Starting point is 00:44:29 sacrificing everything, especially in college, like that's probably why you don't drink. It was the biggest cult I've ever been in. And at the end, I was the captain in my final year. But you learn what, I also come from a family of leaders. Like my grandpa was a basketball coach, like in the 70s and Brooklyn basketball. My mom was the principal of the middle school.
Starting point is 00:44:47 Actually, I actually do love leading. I'm trying to obsessed with bad leaders and good leaders. And like leading by example versus leading by ego and by that kind of stuff. So I do feel like I did pull out pressure myself to make sure everyone had fun. But at the end, it was, you let the pieces fall.
Starting point is 00:45:05 It was the people in my cult that made me a good leader. Which of the cult? Is, again, you being a good leader because you chose them and the best cult are selective. And you were a very selective... It was a very selective situation. Yeah, and I feel like everyone felt like special in their own way in a part of my life. And like to this day, there's still a group chat of all of us that like,
Starting point is 00:45:31 just do it. How often do you feel like it's active? Well, recently my friend who lives in Arkansas texted the group chat. I was like, I'm going to be in New York this weekend who wants to hang. And she like met up with like two of them. The fact that my friends who didn't know each other, who I loved, loved each other, meant the world to me. That is because I was like, oh that's grown-ass. Yeah. If I love you, why wouldn't you love someone else? Literally. Not to get like a little depressing, but a friend of mine
Starting point is 00:46:01 passed away like a couple like a little bit ago and he he was one of my best friends ever, but I've been hanging out with every person he ever introduced me to. And it's amazing because of course I'm going to get along with these people. Of course these people are in my life, and that's how you know that you're good at picking the right friends because then your friends are friends with each other. Well, I'm really sorry that happened, but it is, it is really beautiful to see like, there's a reason why friendships happen and you don't know what that like invisible string is. But it's there. I do think a lot of bachelors do get toxic when the person enjoys the power too much and needs it to always be about them. Exactly. And that, I think that's what I learned in the bad show
Starting point is 00:46:46 that if you constantly make it about you, I have nothing to speak just about you. I don't, then it becomes this just like, they start hating you. Yeah, and that's why I think that you're, like, and this is not just me complimenting you. I wanna make this clear. Do you want to join the show?
Starting point is 00:47:01 This is not just me complimenting you. Um, but you enjoyed the power and then you would, like, if like someone else had a little bit of power, you were like, let them have it. People loved making me laugh, and I loved to laugh. Yeah, and I remember feeling like when I would really laugh at someone's joke, they would be really happy. And I remember being like, how did I cultivate
Starting point is 00:47:22 the funniest people in the world? But I could just sit back. Because you're okay sharing the light because you're confident in yourself. Well, not the end of the day, they all had to tag me and they're into stories. Perfect. Really good for everybody. Engagement. I want to tell you a quick story that I just remembered, which is fucking crazy. I've never been to a bachelor at party, but my cousin got married a couple years ago and she invited me to her bachelor at party. Email chain C-seed, all of our girl cousins, like all eight of them, except for my sister. My sister was in on the email chain. And so I replied to the email and I was like, oh, hey,
Starting point is 00:47:59 Caroline, like this sound so fun, like I'm pumped. Just want to make sure, like, I think you forgot to include Danny on the email. And she replied and she's like, no, she's not invited. And I was like, she is the only cousin not invited. You both live locks away from each other in Brooklyn. You invited our cousin who lives in Madrid to New Orleans. She's not gonna go.
Starting point is 00:48:23 That's a war. That's a war. That's a war. A war has been called. That was literally like a nuclear war. We got into the biggest fight of our life. She uninvited me from her wedding. And I didn't go.
Starting point is 00:48:34 You did save a lot of money. I did. And it wasn't called me. You did get out of the cult. Yeah. But it is true that like, I always say that women, if we were in power, like we wouldn't start wars. And I think that's true,
Starting point is 00:48:46 because we'll literally be like, you're uninvited. Yeah. We're not talking in Germany right now. And that's it. No, there's no violence. It's just like, you are isolated from the group. That's why women should be in power because they would be economic wars.
Starting point is 00:48:56 Yes. It would be socioeconomic. It would be like, actually, we're not buying your leather anymore. Yeah. We're not buying your leather. It's not on trend. It's not cool.
Starting point is 00:49:04 So I'm trying to make a fudge. And they would incorporate it into social media. We're not buying your leather. It's not on trend. It's not cool. So I'm trying to make a fudge. And they would incorporate it into social media. They would make it uncool. Yeah. It would be like a political war. It would be like a political war. It would be like a political war.
Starting point is 00:49:14 Honestly, like, did we just solve world problems? OK, so you mentioned like it can get out of control. I want to ask, what do you think is like the worst case scenario at a bachelor at party? The worst case scenario is when a, the people are from such different walks of life and you don't actually have good connections with them, but like you had to invite like your brother's pregnant wife
Starting point is 00:49:34 who you don't really know that well. Or you owed someone something where like, I've gone to bachelor, that's where immediately people are warning me about one person like, hey, we don't like her, but like she invited her to hers. Yeah. And the hey, we don't like her, but like, she invited her to hers. Yeah. And the whole time it's just like the girls being like,
Starting point is 00:49:48 this butch again. And that's like not the point of a batch of red. And it's uncomfortable because they're from different walks of life. They don't vibe as well. Oh, for sure. Yeah, so you're like doing these really intimate communal things, like, you know, everyone got the bride lingerie
Starting point is 00:50:03 and you're opening lingerie. It's like cringe worthy when you're seeing next to this like pregnant woman. You don't know. Yeah. And also, it can be really expensive. I joke in my act that like, why are we all in Scottsdale, Arizona right now?
Starting point is 00:50:17 Nobody knows. How did we pick this location? Like did we find the most inconvenient, hot place we can go? And it's like, maybe it was supposed to be affordable, but now it's not and it's also random. Yes, and if you don't really care about the bride, everyone just cares about their own shit, where it's like, I just woke up with my boyfriend.
Starting point is 00:50:34 I don't like this, because the concept of someone celebrating love, like it's the end all be all, is triggering for people. Yeah. Because it's not the end all be all. No. I would argue that that me finding a guy that I like to be with
Starting point is 00:50:47 was the least impressive thing I've ever done in my life. Yeah, I mean, I think it's impressive on a personal standpoint of you being so mature that you know what you want. I also think I was the friend that no one expected to get married, so it was like, this is a bit. Yeah. Like, this is crazy.
Starting point is 00:51:10 This is weird or like, this is a surprise. That's how you have to treat everything. Everything is a bit until it isn't. Or it's just always a bit. Like even on the wedding day, I was like, he-he. Oh, we're doing it. Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:51:24 Do you think that Bachelorette's are allowed to cheat at their Bachelorette party? That is so wild to me, because I actually know multiple stories of people who like meet someone on the other Bachelorette and will like have sex or start a relationship, like texting. I do think Bachelorette.
Starting point is 00:51:44 I do think Bachelorette and bachelorette. Sometimes people will meet other bachelorette and it's very horny. You know, bachelorette and bachelorette parties come together. And I think it's also the first, like, real acknowledgement of, like, they use these words, like, one dick for life, or like,
Starting point is 00:52:03 last time being single type things, and people can get triggered. Last night of my freedom. Yes. Yeah. And I also do think that cos marriage is also a cult. You can start getting cold feet. And also, a lot of the time, like, people get married for the wrong reasons. Yeah. Because like, you turn 29, we got to get get married. Yeah, this guy has money. I want to get married Yeah, or like I've just been with him a long time I'm not judging. I would do that one I've been with this guy for a long time. I'm wasting my time or I've just been obsessed with getting married
Starting point is 00:52:36 And I don't really know if he's a good person like yeah, and that's so human and normal Also not to sound too soft, but I think that's why it's important to like truly surround yourself with people who are genuinely so happy for you because it is just authentic that they like are excited for you and you're genuinely happy that you're getting married. So it's like you aren't going to go out there and cheat. And then also Coltie, tie everyone up in your drama because- Which we love. Which we love which are kind of which we love But if a bride cheats that's the I think that's the Coltiest thing you can do yeah, because then you're all bonded by the trauma and by the secret and the secret and then you have to show up to the wedding
Starting point is 00:53:17 Huh and everybody knows no I remember being like if anyone besides jarroll even looks at me get the fuck out and being like, if anyone besides Jarrule even looks at me, get the fuck out. And even, but it was so cool too, because like none of the girls were trying to hook up with guys too. Like it was literally this feminist commune of us just like celebrating that like, also we're not in our early 20s.
Starting point is 00:53:35 We were at a place where we all could like, afford dropping a couple of hundred dollars, which is nice, because some people, they're about to rent to their 23, they have no money, they're trying to get their friends to do this thing. Everyone's like, I'm in the red because of this. And it's hard to enjoy.
Starting point is 00:53:47 Which is painful. And people who like, the energy of one person being authentically happy for you really spreads. Yeah. And it is like a cult where like, if there's enough people who are questioning the motive, they'll all turn. Or if there are enough people that are genuinely happy,
Starting point is 00:54:02 then the other ones like, are constantly happy. Of course, genuinely happy. For sure. Because they're like, oh my god, Paige, you're so happy for her. Do you not support Stephanie? Yeah. Well, it becomes cool to be like, yeah, I totally swear Hannah.
Starting point is 00:54:12 Yeah. It's great. And then it becomes, it's so funny how things can become cool just because of group think. Yeah. And thinking friend groups is such a thing. It is. Where like, it just takes a couple people
Starting point is 00:54:22 being like, is she kind of like being annoying? But that's also why we join Colts and why Colts are a positive thing and like a live your life because that's why I think it's actually, it's Coltsy that you don't drink because drinking and like using any sort of substance is giving up control. And you're like, I always wanna be in control
Starting point is 00:54:40 but regular people join Colts because we have so much decision making to do in our day to day lives that it's like, yeah, I'll fucking go to Miami and do whatever you want. I'm in a... I'll go tomorrow. Okay, so last question. Do you think Bachelorette parties are a live-your-life, a watch your back, or a get the fuck out level cult? Watch your back.
Starting point is 00:55:06 Why? Because I do think certain experiences are really beautiful to like celebrate community. And then certain ones, you can kind of be like taking advantage of and like just be stuck on like an ego trip. Unless if you're like, oh, I'll do this for her because she'll do it for me and
Starting point is 00:55:25 that's important for you. But otherwise, it's like life's too short to spend like hundreds of dollars and like waste tons of time with like people that we don't care about. And also not to go back to the same point, but like it is a watch your back if you're going for the wrong reasons, like not to sound like I'm on the backboard. But if you have a feeling in your gut that you're not going to enjoy it, don't go. Yes, and I do think at the end of the day, but then there's stuff like, oh, well, we all agreed to put $100
Starting point is 00:55:55 for the Airbnb, so you're fucking everyone. But you could even be like, you got to get out of my gift to you. You could even be like $100. There should be an option. Also, I'm more a proponent of divorce parties. Oh, yeah. I think that's what I wanna get in it.
Starting point is 00:56:12 Like, when she needs you. Like when she's going through it, let's get the girls together, let's go out and let's fuck some guys. Yeah. That makes more sense to me than a bachelor at party. A bachelor at is kind of like, girls, like I'm not gonna be friends with you anymore
Starting point is 00:56:26 because I have a man now, but let's celebrate. Let's do it. Let's do it. That's for the girls and no sex. No sex. And, pay attention to my dude. Don't tell anybody. Don't tell anybody.
Starting point is 00:56:36 And if I slip up, lips sealed for life. So yeah, I think we should normalize the next cult as divorce parties. Yeah, that's the best cult I've ever heard of us. I think that's more something to celebrate. Yeah, I agree. Yeah. Okay. Well, thanks so much for coming on the podcast. We have one honor. Thank you so much for having me. It's been so much fun. If you want to tell our listeners anything about you or where to join your cult, where can they do that? You know, I do have a couple cults. Yeah. Gagley Squad is kind of the main cult.
Starting point is 00:57:06 It's a podcast. I have my best friend Paige, who I talked to all I should about today. And then, you know, I'm on the road. Hannah Burnett comes to us shows. I'm going everywhere this fall and winter. So, hit me up and then follow me on social media. I'm taking a lot. Yeah, hilarious.
Starting point is 00:57:21 Hannah Burnett, you have to go check out one of her shows. And you gotta take it soon, because they're selling out. We're trying. We're hustling in these things. Yeah, hilarious, Hannah Burner. You have to go check out one of her shows. And get a ticket soon, because they're selling out. We're trying. We're hustling in these things. Yeah, she is. OK, thanks so much. So much. So much.
Starting point is 00:57:31 So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much.
Starting point is 00:57:37 So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So much. So In the meantime, stay cultzy, but not too culty. Hahaha! Sounds like a cult was created, hosted, and produced by Issa Medina and Amanda Montel. This episode was edited, produced, and sound mixed by Issa Medina.
Starting point is 00:57:54 Our theme music is by Casey Colt. To join our cult, follow us on Instagram at Sounds Like A Colt Pod. I'm on Instagram at Issa Medina, I-S-A-A-M-E-D-I-N-A, where you can find tickets to my live stand-up comedy shows or tell me where to perform. I'm on Instagram at Amanda Underscore Montel and if you'd like our show, feel free to give us a rating on Spotify or Apple podcasts. Get ready for a game changer. Book outlet is here to redefine your book buying experience. Say goodbye to breaking the bank, and hello to Savings of at least 50% off list prices
Starting point is 00:58:46 on brand new books every day. It's like a never-ending book sale 24-7, 365 days a year. So, what's their secret? Their books come from publishers overstock, which makes it possible for them to pass on amazing savings to you. With over 50,000 titles at your fingertips and hundreds of new books arriving daily, it's the best bookish treasure hunt. You just never know what you might find at Book Outlet, but act fast, there's no guaranteed
Starting point is 00:59:14 re-stocks. And hold onto your bookmarks, there's more, they offer free shipping. How's that for turning the happy ending into a happy wallet? Head to bookoutlet.ca today and stop paying full price for brand new books. Book Outlet, Unbelievable Savings, Everyday.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.