Stavvy's World - #109 - Andy Milonakis

Episode Date: December 30, 2024

Andy Milonakis joins the pod to discuss being an internet trailblazer, growing up in NYC, his wild career path, his early love for reggae, being hilariously good at computers, being a high school dropout, his favorite vacation spots in Greece, rapping, getting scouted for a role in Waiting, and much more. Andy and Stav help callers including a guy who wants to get on TRT but whose girlfriend is against is, and a woman whose boyfriend is very insecure about her past number of partners. Follow Andy Milanokis on social media: https://www.twitch.tv/andymilonakis https://www.instagram.com/andymilonakis https://www.youtube.com/@andymilonakis   https://x.com/andymilonakis  🎟️ See Stavvy live on the Dreamboat Tour 🛥️💕!!! https://stavvy.biz/ for tickets 🎥 Rent or buy LET'S START A CULT at https://stavvy.biz/movie ‼️ Bonus episodes every week! Unlock exclusive, Patreon-only episodes at https://www.patreon.com/stavvysworld ☎️ Wanna be part of the show? Call 904-800-STAV and leave a voicemail to get advice!

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BitMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. Hoppa! Welcome everybody to Stavvy's World 904-800 staff. Call in, we'll solve all your problems. It's about to be a new year. And we have to celebrate with truly a Hellenic legend on the couch folks our boy Andy Milonakis is here Andy thanks for coming dude Because he phrased putana malaka putana malaka oh really I didn't see that there we go all around Greece screaming putana malaka as Greek strangers. Shout out to Speed. We'll get him in. We'll get him in.

Yeah, I'd love to have Speed. If you want to talk about putanas malakas, you let us know. Yeah, it was like a really like probably like a 92 year old guy. And he's like, he couldn't really articulate in English what he was trying to say, but he's like, trying to say, like, I don't like that language. really articulate in English what he was trying to say, but he's like trying to say like, I don't like that language. Yeah, it's so funny to see like the most energetic black teenager that these people

have never seen someone like Speed. And he's just saying. And by for those at home, putana malaka means whore jerk off. So he's just yelling at old Greek people. But, you know, I just like that it's getting that the culture is getting out there. Yeah, I like that speed is raising awareness of all the whores and jerk-offs in Greece, of which there are many. I would have gone with the Yamoto speedy suit. That's my favorite.

That's a good one. Fuck your house. Yeah, we have a lot of great phrases. My favorite is when you're when you're saying someone's not going to do shit to you and they're threatening you. You say some glasses that he'd yeah, which means you're's not gonna do shit to you and they're threatening you, you say, Tha mu klasis tha arhidja. Which means, you're not gonna do shit to me.

And it literally means, fart on my balls. He's like, this is how little I care about you, you can fart right on my balls, chief. Which is such a great insult, makes no sense. It's like, how would a guy even do it? He would have to get really close to your dick and balls It's kind of a homoerotic thing But hey also for a big religious group of people the Greeks are insanely religious They have one of the most vulgar fucking phrases all the time. That's like sacrilege, right? It's I fuck your Virgin Mary, which is very interesting which is like who's yeah right now i'm not the body of the body of the fuck the right for a as i thought your virgin mary

which is very interesting which is like who's yes i can't buy a few whose is do they have a specific virgin mary that's not yours but is very sacrilegious in these because our whole thing is being over we actually covered this in a recent actually this look though we covered an episode that will come out weeks from now hope that we do some theology on the patreon and basically her whole thing is that she just never Fucked but you know Mary. Yeah, I got in trouble. I was up in the mountains of Crete And I was walking around and there was like an old church. You know yeah, I'm super nostalgic

I've been going since I was seven totally and they have like a big bell, and I just rang it Oh, well, they're like I think I'm super nostalgic. I've been going since I was seven totally and they have like a big bell And I just rang it. Oh well like You're just trying to have a nice time on the mountains like, oh this will be cool the bell ringing and they're like, oh no, oh no, Dimitri's dead, Dimitri finally kicked the bucket. That's so, it's also very funny to have a death bell. Yeah. It's like that's pretty depressing man. Yeah, they're very blunt about a lot of shit like death and life but that's what makes them so cool because they're so like, wear their heart on their sleeve type.

Like, I have a really big family on my mom's side, but you go to Christmas and it's all like, nice at ease and small talk and like, so yeah, you're doing good, oh. Oh, you're doing good, oh yeah. And then my aunt is like, my heart bleeds until you come back, sir, I am nothing without you.

I know. They love guilt. Greek people are great at guilt. They're very descriptive guilt. Oh, so is your mom's side, your mom's American? Can you get the mic a little closer? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, eat that.

Suck that mic. Yeah, I mean, she's born's born here like it's got generations removed she's Irish Italian, but got generations removed I'm not like I don't like pose that like yeah, I got this I got that It's it's a few generations removed, so I'm not really in touch with that culture totally she's born and raised here Gotcha, my dad's the Greek one. Yeah. Yeah, So that does the, that's the, that is a definite, like, a stark difference between a Greek holiday and a, like, American Irish holiday. Yeah. They love, I mean, Easter especially.

We got the best Easter of all. Greek people love Easter. Easter is more important than Christmas for Greeks. Without question. Yeah. Well, they also, like, that's why I like, like last year we had Yanis Papas on For the new year. I like having Greeks on because Greek people love New Year's That's they're like big ass like my my family tried this

They tried to make us wait till New Year's for presents because that's what they do in Greece and we weren't having that shit We're like look motherfucker. We're in America I need my fucking Legos right the fuck now And you gotta find the lucky coin in the cake of course You know who's got who gets the good luck in the fucking Easter cake you you American cretins know nothing about that Watch the cretin war Cretin I've gotten the coin before I don't think anything good has ever happened to me. Then you get the coin and then you had like the worst year of your life.

Elders. I don't remember. So how to know if I did it definitely did not change anything about my life. Elders of course is Albanian. Andy, do you have any what's your relationship to the Albanian people? I don't know. Shit. Speed went to Albania too. I do want to explore more of Europe though because I mean I've pretty much

traveled for a living for like eight years and like there's a lot more of Europe I want to explore. Yeah. But in my eyes just from what I've seen and what where I've been, if I had to like rank countries in Europe, I feel like Greece and Italy are the two kings of Europe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Greece is awesome, dude. Yeah, that's your blood speaking and it's true. It's fucking sick. It's the best like hangout culture.

Now, do we have the best public transit? Do we have the best public transit? Do we have the best infrastructure? Do we have the best people that work at cell phone stores? Or when you go up and ask for help, do they say, wait, and walk away and come to their cousins for 45 minutes? Yeah, it's like the customer service is either incredible in places that's like pure tourism, or it's the worst you've ever gotten in your life and

If you're there with a woman, they will try and fuck her in front of you I mean This is what I boil it down to if they're in the food industry or like like, you know Selling like baked goods or restaurants. They're really nice to you if they're in any corporate setting banks cell phone stores they're mentally retired you're so right about that they're like I'm getting a fucking SIM card and the guy is typing like fucking the body the Holy Bible he's he just keeps typing like an hour I'm like bro it's a SIM card yeah wait and then. Wait. And then he goes off like, it's fucking brutal, man.

And I don't know if you've gotten this, but I, because my Greek is like whatever. Like I try and get better. I'm fluent, but at a small, like at a fucking eighth graders. Yeah, yeah. But when I'm in Greece, I'm like, I'm going to learn, I'm going to like speak Greek. I'm really going to get back in there.

They have no patience for a Greek American trying to connect to his roots like I was trying to remember I was trying to rent a car and I was speaking Greek and they were just like These I heard that I'm like trying to like piece it together. They're not doing horrible It's just that when the fuck do I ever talk about cars with my family? like if we're talking about like making plans doing whatever like I can speak Greek, but I'm like Here's almost a kid. Oh, yeah plans doing whatever like I can speak Greek but I'm like we need a car for 6 people and we could

and then she just hears me she's like when do you need the car for we have SUV if you need SUV and I was just like ok I will come pick just the most emasculated I've ever felt in my fucking life yeah they always do that they're like this is gonna be faster for me if I speak English come pick just the most emasculated I've ever felt in my fucking life yeah I speak two languages you fucking idiot I'm smarter than you and I work it I'm a guy that fucking car deal at a car rental place I'm a 50 year old man in a

car rental place I am bilingual you live in a different country and are from Ethnically this country and you still can't manage two languages Where have you been in Greece by the way? I was curious about that my family's from Athens And so and then my yaya her island is Thaso which is in northern Greece That's us and then my godfather lives on Naxo. I've been to a lot of Naxos Naxos fucking rules Yeah, Naxos. I've been to a lot of the... I love Naxos. Naxos is fire. Naxos is fucking rules, yeah. Naxos, I've been to like, you know, some of the touristy islands there. Santorini, Mykonos, that kind of shit. Yeah.

Um, had a horrible time and I just think those are a little overrated. They're big overrated. Yeah, hugely overrated. And Paros is kind of turning into Santorini a little bit. It's getting much more touristy. Yeah. I think Milos is fire. Has fire. Milos, yeah, I want to go there. My friend just went this summer. I've never been to Crete yet

A whole different subculture. Yeah, the food is different. The people are different. I was shooting guns at weddings Yeah, cuz it's the most it's southern Greece so it's like it's like if you mix like Greece North Africa and like even like some Middle Eastern stuff, it's like, and I have friends who are like Crete, from Crete, and they're like, you look at them, and you're like, you're like from Egypt. They're like dark as shit, and of course, their father is one of the most racist guys

I've ever met in my life, and talking about how like he's superior to black people, it's like like you are African You're like a dark issue. You look darker than like Hispanics like you look darker than a lot of Dominicans But that happens so that that's a very funny thing that you'll get like and that happens in other islands too like Carpathal which is like really close to Turkey and shit those motherfuckers look straight up North African they have like really acid and they'll they are the most racist Your life is there they're just like yeah, we're superior to that. We're not the same person to me this sums up what Creed is My father you know we have like a house in the village like way high in the village a lot of the places like no

guardrails you just windy roads no rails there's little statues of the Virgin Mary for any time like a tourist or somebody drunk here's a little statue yeah and him and his friends would go in the back of a pickup truck at night one holding a flashlight one holding a shotgun and they would go around driving around those mountain roads like shooting rabbits Just good to just having a good time with the fellas probably drunk as shit I know that's my favorite shit is that they have guardrails nowhere, and they'll also just let like Children drive moped drunk and just going up these fucking winding ass roads

I remember being a 13 year old being like so scared and how like like Experienced Greek children village children were there like 13 smoking cigarettes getting pussy talking about having gangbangs Pussy talking about having gang bangs together I want to play Pokemon Fucking scared when my mom was like go play with the kids These guys are getting pussy and fucking shooting guns and shit. I was legit afraid Yeah, but I would show them a dollar and they'd be like oh they thought one dollar was like worth like so much it was the drachma but it was still like one dollar was still not that

much money you know what I mean like I guess I could basically I traded kids like a dollar for the equivalent of like $20 they're like I got an American dollar I was like I can use fucking US imperialism To get these kids off the scent of what a pussy I am If they wanted they could just beat the fuck out of me took it taking the dollar But you know Uncle Sam had my back. That's one interesting thing I was thinking of because like I watched a lot of travel shit. I travel a lot I was thinking of because like I watch a lot of travel shit. I travel on

For people who are like it's not like I know they don't really classify shit as like third-world tech world anymore Mm-hmm, but for a pretty fucking corp like poor country. I Don't see like, you know besides like some motherfucking in Athens who are not even Greeks like yeah People don't like there's not a lot of fights there's not a lot of people like stealing your shit or robbing you like it's pretty chill

yeah I mean like of course it does happen once in a while there's fucking millions of people everywhere but like I was surprised with how like peaceful it is there yeah yeah no I mean I think it's just such a chill it's a culture of hanging out and having a good time. Yeah, it's like everyone's just chilling they're like yeah there's not that I mean you know we also

probably go in relatively safer places I'm sure it happens a little more but you're right you don't hear about people complaining about it that much like I mean there's just more of a social safety net like homelessness is as big as an issue because also there's there's more family there's just more of a social safety net like homelessness is as big as an issue There's also there's there's more family There's a bigger family culture and there's a bigger social safety net So it's like if you're struggling your family will help you and then you can also get support from the fucking government Where is here? It's like Americans. It's like they'll kick their children out They're fucking 16 and then and there's no and there's no social safety net really to speak of so

that's why you I think that's why you get those fucking issues but yeah you've been traveling a bunch right like you just like you like yeah it's winding down a little bit but I'm every time I see on the internet you're like having fucking Korean barbecue in Korea My last Greece trip was three months ago. I went to a couple new islands. I haven't been to in the onion I'll have got that in Coflonia nice, and then I think like maybe four months before that I did Italy again Which I almost got robbed in Naples Naples is seriously one of my favorite places in Italy. Like Naples and and and like Palermo, Sicily. But not only that, I was screaming late night and fucking this guy was like, I and me.

Really? The hotels are so fucking weird in Naples. You have to like buzz yourself in and you open you open the door and it's this pitch black, deep garage. And it's just pitch black and the garage goes like fucking 100 yards. And then you walk 100 yards in that pitch blackness and then there's like a little tiny elevator that brings you up.

So this guy like right when I buzzed myself in he kinda like scurried over to me. And then he held the door for me And I was drunk as hell, but I still had that New York Street part in my fucking brain And I'm like no after you after you he goes no no no after you after you and I go no no after you And he walks in and holds the door for me, and I just fucking jet towards like where I saw some people Yeah, dude, and this was like this was late So there wasn't that many people and as like I looked behind my back as soon as I walked like 10 feet

He like walked out and left. Yeah for sure. He had a huge knife. He was like hmm. Yeah Like I wouldn't really mind losing like my camera setup, but if I got fucking like beat up to That's a very chill way to look at it, man. I wouldn't mind losing my expensive specific camera setup that I used to make my living, but I just don't want to get the shit kicked out of me. Exactly. I don't want to get fucking beat up by some goon. Have you been robbed before? Have you gotten like... Back in the day in Manhattan, I was buying like reggae mixes at this place called House of Nubian.

How old were you? What are we talking about? What years are this? This is probably like, I was like maybe 16. Yeah, young Andy the house of newbie I buy the liquor is Tuesday that's so fucking funny and my Egyptian musk yeah and I had like money on the table to buy like all the stuff I was buying and this guy fucking who's selling sunkissed orange cans Yeah, like a dollar each of the outside the guy outside No, yeah, the cooler

Sunkissed orange, bro. Yeah, and um, and then he saw my money and he grabbed it Chased him and I was screaming on my lungs to get it back because that was all I had and that's a lot for me. And like I caught up to him because I wasn't as much of a fat fuck at the time. Yeah, yeah. A youthful. He goes, follow me to the park, son. I'm going to fucking stab your ass. Damn. He just said stab or shoot.

And then like some undercover cop like heard me screaming and chase the guy down He couldn't catch the guy and the guy just threw the money on the ground so I went back but interesting Yeah, that's very adventurous. I mean I guess 16. You don't know any better, but that's a little insane thing to do It's like just fucking chase some guy You're a teenager Trying to buy trying to buy reggae mixes Get ready for Las Vegas style action at Ben MGM the king of online casinos enjoy casino games at your fingertips with the same Vegas trip excitement MGM is famous for when you play classics like MGM Grand Millions, or popular

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Bet MGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. That's fascinating. Were you living in Queens? Like, where were you, where'd you grow up? No, I was actually living in Westchester County. Okay. But, I've told this story before, but it was, it's a weird part of Westchester County. Because it was like a little pocket of ghetto. I think people don't understand that. They're like, Oh, it's Westchester. Everything is rich. Yeah. But there's little pockets of ghetto everywhere you go. And this is also a while ago right? This is a long time ago. Yeah. It's like

90s. Yeah 90s yeah I mean it's like Westchester was so I mean I'm sure it was nicer than parts of you know New York but it's like there's definitely parts of it that could be kind of shitty in the 90s. So I never glamorizedize it I've never seen and like no one's ever been like shooting and holding up guns Yeah, yeah, but like late 80s early 90s. There was a lot of crack and a lot of like fucked up shit Yeah, like I got an argument with some guys like fucking son, and he picked me up by my fucking neck You were a kid and an adult started fighting, gave you the Darth Vader. Yeah and my mother called the cops on him and he was in the back of the cop car and they're like do you want to press charges?

And he goes, she goes no I think it's going to make it worse. Don't press charges but if you touch my son again you're going to fucking jail like Yeah, you know damn But fucking insane choking a child So fucking crazy. Yeah But I mean my memories from my life there like all the weird shit like going on This place Maple Avenue in Mount Kisco and getting the Mexican guys to buy us 40 ounces Oh, yeah, I am one yeah, and I'm a sir a classic. hey mister situation. Yeah and the crack dealer that worked out of my best friend's house. He like, he like bought us all the ill shit. He like, he took us to Brooklyn and like to Bushwick and this is before like, like fancy ass motherfuckers are living not chill. Yeah. He would just buy us like Nintendo games and food and stuff. Like we basically had like a guy that fucking give us money. That's so funny. So you had, so your crew, your mentor was a crack dealer who got you, who showed you like Bushwick and

got you Nintendo games? So my best friend named Mootie, his um. Yeah, what's the crew like you Mootie me Mootie There's a man e there's a bunch of like old-school guys, right? But it was mace basically me Mootie really inseparable He lived like so the complexes are like this and then you walk outside you go upstairs And then there's another row of apartments. You guys have the same housing like bullshit, right? so I Would be over there every day. We'd be watching like, you know shit on TV, you know playing Nintendo whatever and

The crack dealer befriended mootie somehow and was cooking crack out of his apartment So because he was how old was moot just like you know I think we're both around 15 16 I forget but since he was cooking crack out of Mootie's apartment. He was just generous with all the money That's a crack dealer with a heart of gold Fucking street fighter Didn't molest you no Yeah. This is- He buys like- He buys like- He buys like- He buys like- He buys like fucking Street Fighter or Chinese food and shit. That's fucking awesome. Didn't molest you?

No. No. No. But I did- But I did- But I did- When I- When I was a kid, I-

When I was a kid, I- I- I was in the room when some guy raped somebody. Oh no, dude! That sucks. I probably fucked you up, huh? Maybe. Yeah, I think- I think so, man. I think we can safely say that fucked you up. I think so man. I think we can safely say that fucked you up

And he tried to like grab my dick to see if it was hard. Oh Yeah, you got you got drive-by molested during a different sex crime. You got you got a little molested So the craziest thing about it. We're me the crack dealer Mootie. We're all eating Chinese food And then the lights went out and it was getting late anyway, and you know, I'm still in early teens I still have to go home and shit. Yeah, so I was like, all right, what the fuck? I gotta see if my lights are out too. I'll see you tomorrow. I went home. My lights were on I didn't think anything of it went to bed next day. I walked downstairs and He had moot. He has no door. Oh no battering rand open

The feds ransacked the place And he lived with his parents I guess His mom yeah, yeah damn, dude. Yeah, well his mom. His mom, yeah, yeah. Damn dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Damn dude. So. But we had so many adventures. Yeah, it sounds like pretty adventurous. Sounds like it was a pretty laissez-faire parenting if you could hang out with crack dealers and no one cared. It seems like you guys were able to do some fun stuff. Yeah, my mother was just naive. She didn't know what was going on. Yeah, she's like, oh they're gonna play Nintendo at Mootie's house yeah I mean and pops is shooting rabbits in Crete yeah but yeah I mean when when you have no fear and you're young you have no

fear of death or jail yeah shit's like a movie Yeah. Shit's like a movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all like good times. It doesn't matter. Yeah, dude. I get that for sure. That must have been fun. So you would like pop into the city.

Yeah, I would always go to the city. I'd go to Tad's Steakhouse. It was like the little cafeteria style steakhouse. Oh, I love those style of steakhouses. Yeah, I mean, it's kind of like ghetto for what it is. Sure. When you're a kid that shit's fucking luxury. We had a place called Kings Court in Baltimore that became an Applebee's. my dad just thought it was hilarious and I obviously didn't finish it But it felt good. I just wanted to kind of stake that like, you know a dog in Looney Tunes That's us yeah, but yeah going to city was special to me cuz like I always like having jobs from when I was 14 I was

like working at a gas station oh like a bus boy working at retail stores I always had jobs there's never gaps between jobs because I just love the feeling of getting a check and getting my own yeah were you how's he doing on the can you keep it a little closer no no this is good stuff and Eldis is a bad producer I want to make sure we're not missing any of it He sounds good. Okay, cool. So Yeah going to the city on like the weekend and just being able to buy some clothes buying to buy some like fucking bootleg fucking Yeah, yeah

Music back when we didn't have easy access totally It was amazing. I loved every minute of it. You know, getting to Grand Central, I'd walk my ass all the way down to fucking eighth and sixth. That's where Fat Beats was. And there was also a record store called Rockin' Soul, sold all like the hip hop vinyl. That's fun, dude, to be like a young unsupervised delinquent in New York in the like 90s and 2000s that's fucking sick dude that must have been a fun time yeah it was still kind of like kind of dangerous kind of grimy kind of like you get into some fun stuff yeah

probably you know back when Times Square was actually grimy yeah do you ever jack off in Times Square no they have the jack-off booths Maybe I was I don't know if I was too young or I stopped going yeah around that time I don't know but yeah, I used to go into the adult like sex tape shops and shit I never went into those little yeah, I know That is funny you caught the tail end of that because pretty soon after it became just the M&M store If a guy just comes in the M&M store, I used to beat off here Make the fucking blue M&M show me or to make the green M&M show me your pussy

So fucking bad now, yeah, I always loved New York around Christmas time but now I'm starting to like rethink it like I'm staying downtown and I met up with a bunch of friends and they all like want to go like here and there to do touristy shit but like bro downtown is still kind of cool but like fuckin' Yeah yeah yeah for sure. Yeah Times Square is tough that was very corporate. I had to go there I went to a Broadway show. I went to see Elf on Broadway. Nice.

Cause it was a little Christmas scene. Yeah yeah yeah for sure. And Sean Astin was in it and I didn't even know he did it. Oh nice. But we took an Uber, it took an hour, and we were still like gonna be a half an hour late. So we got off at Grand Central, rushed to the fucking shuttle, fucking subway, and just got off at Times Square. Just literally like if a big picture of like a bunch of humans together. Yeah, it could be classified as AIDS

Especially Christmas it fucking sucks dick, but you know not not the New York of your youth Why are you here with any other fun adventures another one you want to recount? anything That was the time you got robbed Any drug deals good like went bad any weed buys that went bad Well, I you well, I just that I never I was very safe with like pills But you know a little bit later in life Like I like to dabble and like taking some perks sure and I'm with you, bro

I used to buy like perks out of a tanning salon in LA That's the place to do it. Everybody was getting tanned and I walked in the back. He grabbed a hairnet and That's fucking awesome, when'd you move to LA? I moved to LA in like 2004 maybe mm-hmm 2003 maybe. I forget. Was the first thing that popped for you? How old were you when... what was it? The Super Bowl is gay? Yeah. Because we're by the way, we're huge fans. Just to let you know. The Andy Milne Nakka Show. we were fucking legit and having the Greek name

You know how Greek people are dude you see a Greek name There's pride, but you also were just doing shit that we loved we were battle rap fans when we were younger So it's like you hit a lot of the we watched a lot of your shit, dude So yeah, we know all about it just so you know But like how yeah how old we cuz that was like a big thing that was just random, right? Like you were just a guy talking about the Super Bowl being gay. Yeah. I. I just I don't know.

I don't know why I started making videos, but I was doing these like photo realistic comics. Yeah. And then it was just like three random pictures and each one had a little caption and then one of them was a wrap and I was like why I have a webcam now why don't I just make a video yeah and I did that and then I did probably like a hundred of them and I'd get a little bit of response here and there But the crazy part is once I started doing improv at UCB I took like a comedy writing course in Gotham

I literally thought like the next step to making those videos what was to kind of like go out there in the world Yeah, like improv classes and that and while I was doing that shit Yeah, like improv classes and that and while I was doing that shit Instead of uploading like you know a video every few days. It went from like a video every like few weeks So that section of my website was pretty much dying When I made the Super Bowl as gay Banger Like a banger a class it just turned out to be a banger Horrible but yeah, hey man, it was a different time

How like close you were for shit to not happen But yeah, that was you know when I once I started doing all that real world shit met a lot of people that were had Similar interests doing writing classes doing improv You know that's I could have very well died without any of them becoming that popular. And then what sealed the deal for me was another one of my videos that was like a freestyle rap video got the eye of a casting director, which at the time, casting people from online videos was unheard of. No, this is literally like pre is it even pre YouTube?

Yes, that's how crazy that's what an internet og you are. It was like you were fucking you had a shitty webcam You're putting them on your own website. That's so fucking weird and that it worked. It's awesome Yeah, cuz I remember yeah, cuz there weren't we would have to go to weird websites to watch videos That was the era of ebombs world and like like you know shit like that where you had to just be like you would find a video There was no YouTube which is fucking fascinating. Yeah and Yeah, so that could easily you know Oh, yeah

So the casting director found another one of my raps and was just like we've been casting this movie waiting for yeah Great waiting my raps and was just like we've been casting this movie waiting for a year you're great waiting yeah yeah yeah are you in LA she didn't she didn't know Jimmy Kimmel discovered me cuz like I was just being like correspondent man on the street I wasn't really getting my name super out right yet and I was like yeah I'm already out in LA blah blah blah so I went on audition and got it but those the Jimmy Kimmel thing and waiting both happened from separate videos that I uploaded cool Fuck yeah, and you were already in LA at the time when that happened or you moved When the for the when the waiting thing happened I was already in LA when the Kimmel thing happened

I was in New York, and you're like fucking Hollywood, baby Yeah, time to get to Hollywood. Well like I didn't know if it was a joke or I didn't know if it was like a troll or I thought I was gonna go out there and do one thing and it was like oh He thought this was interesting and that's it right, but then they um They made me they're like we saw you have some man on the street videos Can you make another one because you're not in them? I'm just holding the camera. I was walking around Queens in a fucking blizzard People why they're outside in a blizzard Yo, I gotta get my coffee I'm like you're risking people's life

I'm like, why are you having a blizzard and one guy finally got got it most like why are you fucking out in their? Blizzard with a $30 camera. Yeah, actually are you adding a blizzard? And one guy finally got it and was like, why are you fucking out in a blizzard with a $30 camera? I'm like, actually it's a $50 camera. So that was the video where I was just filming and then they wanted me to make like another one. So I went out in Manhattan with my boy Brian Lynch, who's like fucking insane writer. He writes a lot of movies now.

Sick. And he filmed it for me, and I was just like I Was hand-feeding chicken wings to homeless people I was rapping with people Yeah, I was just fucking wild yeah, I sent them to like mini DV tape damn a physical tape Fucking hilarious day, and then they're like okay We're gonna send you to Florida, and you're gonna do correspond that shit. That's awesome. tape? That's fucking hilarious, dude. And then they're like, okay, we're gonna send you to Florida, and you're gonna do correspondent shit for the show. That's awesome. Yeah. That's fucking sick, dude.

It's just all fucking... It's still like Twilight Zone-y when I think about it. Totally. I was working in Manhattan in an office doing like computer tech shit. Really? And it just like... And like... You know, over time it changed my life, but like in...

When I was staying in these hotels, and they were moving me from hotel to hotel because they kept giving me more work Mm-hmm. It was like the most surreal weird fucking totally because you don't feel like you live anywhere You know it's like and it's like all this weird shit And you just have to make these videos and yeah, you feel I mean I at least feel that way when we're on tour so Much where it's like do I even exist? I mean I at least feel that way when we're on tour so much where it's like do I even exist? Am I just a fucking floating entity just doing shows and like you don't feel like you have a home So I can imagine it would be surreal since like your first thing is just and it's on TV By the way, which it's like that's fucking huge and those were those were big like we watched those

You know what I mean? Like those were fucking funny as hell Yeah, that must have been fucking crazy cuz because so you were just living in Manhattan and doing like you had your place Do you have like room? What was your son even in Queens? Yeah in Queens? Okay? Yeah, we had you have roommates What was your son a roommate for a while in? I'm stop. I was living on Steinway. Okay. Oh yeah in the neighborhood. Yeah, and then Yeah. And then, um... But yeah, just hanging out on stuff. You were just like, you know, a guy in your 20s doing like, having shitty jobs and like doing like comedy stuff, trying to figure it out? Yeah, so I was working in Manhattan on 51st and Mad at an accounting firm. I was like their network admin.

Nice. I got hired to go in like three days after 9-eleven happened They're like alright, we got two days off get back 914 everybody's back in the office There's all the fucking missing post I'm going through Grand Central, there's all the fucking missing posters. Oh my god dude! That's when it really hit me, like when I saw the shit happen, but once I saw names and faces it really fucked me up. Of course.

And so I'm like, walking from Grand Central to 51st and Mad, my first day of work there's a major computer virus. I have to stay three days after fucking 9-11 happened. I have to stay in the office by myself overnight till 8 in the morning. Jesus Christ. Fixing every computer. Fixing every computer virus. And when they came back I had everything fixed because all the accountants book out at like a lot of money per hour and shit Mm-hmm and they like had a little meeting in the semicircle and they they sent me home and like a limo It was a it was a good first impression Yeah, you fixed a huge problem that could have cost them so much money. I started coming in late And my boss sat me down and I seriously thought I was gonna get fired. He goes Andrew what time?

What time would you like to come in you seem to not come in on time? I was like, you know, I was getting there like fucking 7 38 a.m. It was miserable. I fucking that's my little dude That's too early. And he's like I was like, I don't know maybe like 11 And that's when I thought he was just gonna fire me and he goes, Andrew, I look at you like an artist, you know, you're different, you know how to fix shit. But, your job now starts at 11. Wow! But you're gonna stay later. Yeah.

But I was like, okay. You're like, hell yeah, those are my hours. That's so fucking funny that you were just so you you've been good at that shit You're also like a techie like I was I was I dropped out of high school because I was fucking around with Computers and shit. Oh, yeah, just like I wasn't like some fucking elite hacker or anything But I was kind of messing with those types of people who are like fucked up weird Eventually who are doing like fucked up weird hacker shit. Right, right, right, right. Eventually, my father only hangs out with like Greek guys that are in dirty clothes

because they're working in restaurants all day. Yeah, yeah. So I came home one day and there's three white guys in suits. And it was the fucking FBI. For what? You were fucking, just your friends, your hacker friends? Because I was fucking around online

Now I was I was the lowest on the totem pole as far as guilt sure sure sure um Like what we what kind of shit like I stole like hundreds of AOL accounts That's like an awesome I had staff accounts to like normally if you like scroll in a chat room you just get kicked because it ruins the vibe of the chat room. But if you have a staff account, you can create these little ASCII scrollers and it will just make like pictures and scroll for hours of just like crazy shit. And you can make your own keyword. Like, people would go there and type keyword weather and see the weather on AOL.

You could type keyword and then like my name and it would be a picture of me telling the other group to fuck themselves. So you're just fucking with people in chat rooms? Yeah, just fucking around. And then my friends who were doing worse shit, they would charge cars to other fucking hackers so they would try to get them caught.

Oh wow. Or like large items, like $4,000 items with stolen credit cards. And they would do it to the address of these other like hackers that got doxed and shit. But I didn't really know all that shit. So basically I told everybody, I was like, my dad's like, we gotta get a lawyer.

And I go, no, let them take my computer now because if they leave, I could just delete everything so it makes me look guilty and They ended up not taking anything. They left never heard from the gang Wow one of my friends got got it way worse I don't know if he did federal prison or if he just got like fucking five years of probation There's a whole, there's a Village Voice article about it. Oh wow. Yeah.

So you were just, at this point in your life, you're like a hacker? You're like a, like a small... I'm like a fake hacker hanging out with hackers, you know what I mean? Sure, but you're like, you're small, yeah, you're like a small time hacker who's also like doing improv comedy, and like just living in Queens with some other guy, just fucking hanging, what a hilarious life, dude. What, that's so funny. And your dad was back from Greece and he was around, or what was he doing at the time? Um, well, once I lived in Queens, I would go back once in a while, but my father never, like, once he came here He never lived in Greece, but he would take he would take me and my family there like you know every few years

But he was living here. He was in Queens. Okay. Gotcha. No. He was living in in Mount Kishko, Oh Westchester gotcha gotcha gotcha. I see so they went to your family's house and At the time yeah, that's you're living Before I got any jobs when I was like I think maybe 18 17 or 18 and before I had the computer jobs and This is in Katona and yeah when I got back and I saw those people I was scared of Damn that's so funny doing doing small-time online crimes, but you were nice with it. Yeah, and I met up with like strangers that were like doing like some like light hacking and shit. Like when we met up in the city and we were like going to like web cafes to do like fucked up shit.

It was like, we were trying to like, we were trying to steal like very short AOL names. Like I had like God or Job, like we were taking... Yeah, yeah. I don't know. names like I had like God or job like I don't know It was like a lot of it was just like script kiddie shit It wasn't like like crazy sure you think about the crazy hackers and what they really do. It was just kidding shit Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we get it man. Yeah, don't worry with the cops will find out about this. You're good Do I just don't want to like be like a poser like yeah? this you're good dude I just don't like be like a poser like yeah fucking elite hacker I respect that man you fight you yeah you tell like it is you were a

small-time hacker that's so funny and then you were just so good at that how long did you did you like when I dropped out of high school I went to this offset of skidmore College in White Plains which is all for tech and I did like MCSE a plus like certification just like basic shit so when I wanted to put shit on a resume as I got yeah non high school diploma just that I have like some qualifications with computers and we had like 21 people we had like 20 something people in our class and none of them could touch me yeah we had like our final thing. They basically

They software broke like 20 computers and then an extra credit one and we had to go around fix it And then when we fixed it the next person the teacher had to like Put some code in to fuck it up here. But yeah, I like I Knew more than everybody in that class like And they paying you well at that other at the 9-eleven job? At the at the time I mean I forget what year it was but I think at the time it was like maybe like 4550 K nice so like this was like over 20 years ago, and you were a fucking young high school dropout Yeah, so I'm sure they were I'm sure you were doing like four times the amount of value for them, but they were like, he doesn't know that. He's some fucking,

you know. Well, the thing is it was, it was a small accounting firm and they didn't know shit. So like, and I, I was really good at what I did. So I had the place fucking well oiled machine dialed in. Yeah. And then they would once in a while, the partners would come up to me. They're like, what are you working on right now? They just wanted to make sure I was working, even though my job was just to make sure everything was up and running well, oil, nothing wrong. And I would always make it up. I'm like, I have to defrag the hard drive.

It's like I'd be on like just different fucking websites You're trying to yeah, you're buying fucking you're buying more reggae stuff on the dark web You're trying to get Bob Marley shoes See Bob Marley's a legend but Not your thing I listen to like I like that raspy fucking just harsh voice Yeah yeah yeah yeah Fucking Capelton Yeah okay nice dude into like, I like that raspy fucking, just harsh voice. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Fucking Capelton. Yeah, okay, nice dude. Yeah, I don't know shit. I'm not a man of the world like you. I'm not as well versed in that shit. Me and LL just were just mixtape. You know, we're a little younger, so it was like we were down.

I mean, I would buy bootlegs at school. We were at the tail end of bootleg shit and then everything was just downloading it off off the fucking internet Yeah, we never did anything. We weren't really I was a fucking pussy as a child My family was like so overprotective and like worried and they never let me do anything fucking cool So it was like until we were like maybe 17 when I got my mom's Dodge Grand Caravan And we could whip it to like kind of sketchy parties, and I started selling weed We didn't really do anything sketchy at all to be honest. We were fucking pussies Yeah, you know yeah, it's funny like I did some fucked up shit, but I wasn't like

Maybe I just seemed too much like a good kid to that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I wasn't like, I wasn't getting into- You had an innocent look about you too. Yeah. You know, young you. I wasn't doing like psycho shit where they're like, oh no, our kid's crazy, we gotta put him in psych ward.

I was just like, shit that an adult should do maybe, maybe but like I'm just drinking a 40 ounce little fucking joint bro I ain't hurting nobody I love it dude yeah that's so funny and then you just go to LA and you're just the spoils of Hollywood you're taking pills I never got addicted I used to always just dabble and then like stop. I was like always paranoid I've never done like you could name any drug in the world if it's like a street drug and not not like a pharmaceutical I've never done it mm-hmm respect. I'm like just cuz I'm scared. Yeah. Yeah, if I wasn't scared. I would I'm curious Yeah, if you tell me I guarantee you nothing bad is gonna gonna happen to you and I could just have some acid right now, I would do it right now.

Wow, no acid, no psychedelics for you. No, I'm just scared. Wow. I'm a fucking pussy when it comes to chili. Interesting, interesting. Yeah, well I've definitely done plenty of those. Oh, you could probably get some, maybe some mushrooms in Amsterdam. The truffles. Those are pretty well regulated over there. Yeah, you have to eat so many of them. I went with a group with my friends and I was the only fucking bitch who didn't yeah, they're all just like shoveling them down Yeah, they're a lot and they're fresh. They taste like shit, but they will get you fucked up. Yeah. Oh, yes, brother

You better believe it. Well, there's so much where we could talk about we got but we you know half the show is we need To give people their sage advice here. Okay, so, you know, people leave voice mails, they're gonna wanna hear from you. We have way more questions, you gotta come back someday or maybe we'll come visit you in, sometimes we do travel shows, maybe we'll come to Texas. Let's see what we got here, Eldis, what do we have? And by the way, in the Midway Point, tell people where they can find you, your streams, like you where where when you want to plug anything here here's the here's a

nice choice place for because we're huge fans me and elders we love this fucking guy he's hilarious and you know now you're straight which I think is a you're great for sure I think a lot of people who stream I don't understand why they have an audience but you're a very interesting funny personality that I would love to watch brother it's fun to watch you do shit and it's fun to watch you even when you're not traveling just like hanging out you're a great streamer so where can they find where can the people find you Andy

I don't know. We'll put it in here, man. No, I'm just kidding. It's just twitch.tv slash Andy Milonakis. There it is. Go find the boy. Find me, motherfucker. Go find him and then come see us, the Dreamboat Tour. If you missed Christmas, great last minute gift gift get people tickets to come see us on tour a lot of shows, huh, I'm gone the dream of this coming tour. We're gone February through May We're gonna be on a tour bus pretty much the whole time

We're gonna have a 10-day break in the middle, but other than that yeah, we're out the whole time. Oh, yeah, it's gonna be fun I'm very I'm fucking excited. I took this year off of touring, and so I'm excited to get back out there and see the people. Hell yeah, buddy. You going to stay in New York for Christmas? I'm going to Baltimore. My family's in Baltimore.

Oh, yeah, that's right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got a little place there that I, that's, you know, we were talking about it off camera, but it's like as much as I love New York Life is so much easier literally everywhere else like I have a whole house in Baltimore. It's fuck it I got a nice big-ass kitchen. I got a nice. Yeah, I love it here, but Relaxing it's not a relaxing place It's a great place to do shit to see shit to have a good time, but I need a couple

I need a little relaxation time So I'm hitting beautiful Baltimore for this kind of like it's kind of like Greece like it's so beautiful So many views are just like feel like you're it's like unrealistic How beautiful it is and then you walk down the road and spraying your fucking ankle? Rooms have no a cd the like they're made out of a rice cake the bed technology increases so mattresses are like in nineteen forty two yeah a luxury hotel you're sleeping on what like a world war two g i slept on

it's not very comfortable no when you go to the beaches and you just see the insane views are like oh man the beach is beautiful and tranquil but You're right. Yeah, there's not very comfortable. No it takes a while to set up You're right actually the infrastructure is pretty similar where it's like everything gets something comfortable would be so fucking expensive Yeah, but it is beautiful. It's a good place to make a luxury of America, but like the beautiful weather and scenic views of Greece Yeah, I mean there's no way we could live there comfortably because everybody would want to fucking live there. Well. That's my goal It's gonna take a while, but I want to like get a place. I want to get like a mattress for a fat man I want to get a specific fat mattress I want to get a like I want to get a place and actually turn it into that but that's like a year of prod

You know, I mean, it's gonna take years to really get right I've been waiting for my Greek citizenship for about three years now There's like they're always like a new piece of paper that I need shit once I get that I do want to buy a house and I probably create Once I get that I do want to buy a house and probably create It's fucking all I just think it'd be cool like to have a bank account there if I need to help my friends like my Not only my friends my like family family. Yeah. Yeah, I'm with you. I want to set up shop there I want to live there like three months out of the year if I can figure it out Yeah, see I am a Greek citizen, but they I don't want to get I don't want to

go to the army so I'm waiting a little bit I'm waiting a little bit but we'll see we'll get there I'll just what do we got can we help these people can we help these idiots what's up Sabanel this hopefully the healthiest bros too I have a relationship question for you guys. I Been in a relationship about three We got it What the fava now did hopefully the healthiest bros to I have a relationship question for you guys here I Been in a relationship about three years now. I

Was originally about 300 pounds when we got together. I'm now 180 ish. Okay, nice, dude. My question is I want to get on gear But my girlfriend is staunchly against it and I'm willing to play the long game here. Hopefully often PRT. I'm 29 years old now. 29 My question is how do you think the best way for me to go about warming her up to that idea? All right, guys, thank you. What are you talking about?

Why do you want to be on fucking gear, bro? You're 29. That's nuts. He's mad his girlfriend doesn't want him to do steroids. She's worried about you. It's an unhealthy thing to do. You've done a great job losing weight. You should be proud of that. But like... I wish his girlfriend was the one writing in about this issue and then I could tell her to dump you. Yeah dude, you're fucking nuts.

Like, what the fuck are you talking about? She should she staunchly against it because it's bad for you. You've done a great job getting healthy Are you gonna be a fucking what? What do you get out of this? You want to be the jack the most jacked guy at fucking office Depot who gives a fuck You want to be the classic T-mobile jacked guy? Like, you have a good relationship. You've lost weight. You've been together three years. This is like, and I know it's not exactly the same, but this is like being like, I really want to get into pills, but my girlfriend is against it. It's like, unless you have a reason to be, unless you have some kind of like,

you know, hormone deficiency, like, it's been shown that this shit is bad for you You'll probably not and even let's say you just get jacked like you will have probably anger issues Like this is unless you're competing like doing steroids isn't at your age is not smart now TRT when you're older Seems like 50 year old guys get to like TRT when you're older Seems like 50 year old guys get to like

Continue to feel young like that's one thing that you know I'm not gonna dismiss outright, but at 29 You're not a professional bodybuilder all this will do is be expensive and maybe like You know detrimental to your health like fuck yourself yet did you maxed out what you can do without your later you really working out that hard were basically were completely on her side you're fucking stupid uh... it must be maybe it's weird you play got loose skin and you feel weird about it

but he's trying to bring to us yes yes yes he called it is that i'm not as fat as you guys I used to be but not anymore don't get on gear unless there's some medical reason for it especially if your girlfriend's against it staunchly against it so yeah man So yeah, man Yeah, dude don't get on gear that's fucking nuts Although I would like to get on gear personally. I mean I get it. I get the fantasy of it It's like it's like if your girl was like I want to get a fucking crazy BBL and big fake tits

It's the male equivalent of that. Yeah, you want to look fucking awesome. I Don't know but I feel like these huge asses to where the fact that there's like ass cleavage Mm-hmm, like I feel like our caveman instincts kick in because the like first glance I'm like, oh that's not And then my brain tells me nah too much Why because like I I feel like my animal instincts like is telling me that it's like not real Just like if you ever grabbed like fake tits sure like you want to get turned on you see the tits they look nice and then your brain kind of goes like I Have never had that issue with fake tits personally really yeah, yeah

Yeah, I think I'm simple enough that if the titties look this is something sometimes fake tits from a purely Aesthetic they stay kind of hard like when you're fucking someone they kind of stay perfect in a weird uncanny way, but my dumb brain's like, nice, two fucking tits that are right there. And I don't mind the grab, I think it's fun. I'm a man of science, so when I grab a fake tit, I'm like, thank you, thank you Dr. Fauci for making this possible.

See, that goes against all I stand for, because when a girl is bent over and the gravity, physics of natural tits when a girl is bent over and the fucking the gravity physics of Natural hits when a girl's bent over those are awesome. Yeah, just like that's the best part about that Actually, that is actually an awesome. Yeah, the the bent over titty hang is awesome I agree with you now. I see your point and my biggest issue with BBLs having Dabbled is that my dick is too little. It's that those huge asses swallow up my little ass dick.

That's why I have to really do some real maneuvering to keep the big ass cheeks from fucking sliding down and just absolutely, it's like an avalanche. It's like an avalanche and my dick disappears, you know when when those big butt cheeks come down so but I'm you know Personally, I'm a I am an admirer of what science is capable of we have the technology We have the technology let's play God. Let's push it to the limit get the bionic BBL bionic bbl showing. Bro, yeah I mean I don't mind the asses that much but it's just the face, the face surgery. Oh the face, yeah sure. That's true. That's where it gets a little bit wack. Yeah get some big fake tits, some big fake asses but it's also like keep that face natural.

It's also like the brain that goes behind it like what type of human being this is. I'm not talking about just fucking but I'm talking about like the brain behind the woman with the fake fucking surgery, fake face, fake tits, fake ass, like how is she for drinks? Right, right, right. If you're too worried about your appearance, are you investing in yourself in any other way? Yeah.

Sort of thing. It's just like what goes on in your mind and how is your personality? Right, if all you value is how you look, what else? Is there nothing else to you? Can you imagine being blown away by a woman's personality that had the fakest face you've ever seen? Fakest tits, fakest ass? It would be interesting. I think that's a rare breed. Yeah.

I think some of them are out there. We need science to start injecting some maybe I'm a much more of a simpleton than you because I'm like fake tits I'm like I'm the year that I'm like it'll take me a while it'll take me like dating that person for a month to realize hmm what is her personality I do think I do think we have gotten to a point where like more way more people are Sort of like doing some minor stuff like almost everybody does something these days Because it's gotten the technology has gotten kind of good enough like how many friends I don't know if you if you feel if I feel like all my dude friends

No one no one is a fucking no one has the desire No one has the fucking guts to go bald anymore all these fucking guys are getting fake hair You know what I mean like and and that's the same thing with like oh, this is the light up one. I just realized And I feel like the same thing with like Like filler they've kind of figured it out where it's not usually if you're light about it. It doesn't go crazy So I think we're finding more people but I take your point though my friend that I'm hanging out with this week is bald but he's like he's like bald he's like a handsome like like really tall like he was like meant

to be bald right so I don't got the right angular yeah well yeah to Joe shout out to just sexy Joe sexy cute that sexy cue ball but yeah I'm with you though that's it that is a good point everybody flies to Turkey for hair they do they do Turks have figured that out it's a pomegranate juice I'm gonna get plugs on like 65 years old I'm gonna zag that's always been my that's always been my move your character All right, what else we got LD? stop, all right, I Broke up with my girl or me my girl fell apart I started seeing this new girl and

She's like 5'5", 120 pounds, loves to work out and she's like got, with those mini skirts, like tights, she wore a collar to my first day with her. Nice. Like I don't know about it, it's awesome. It's fucking dope but she also Has this like, you know anti-establishment Patriarchy thing going on so like she doesn't want to like shave the legs It's a lot of these guys man A lot of these calls are like this.

ChadGBT, can you write this long, simp message about me and my girl? And instantly it's like, yes, here's nine paragraphs. Yeah, it's like, oh, we've been doing this a lot. ChadGBT is mostly used for this. Okay, sorry to interrupt. No, no, no, feel free to interrupt. She doesn't want to like shave the legs. She doesn't like to like wear deodorant. And I'm just like I don't really know how I feel about it, you know, cuz like I get it right I wouldn't want to shave my legs either. Fuck that.

But like her legs get like almost hairier than mine. She's big. So I'm just kind of like, I don't really know how to feel about it. Right. And it's like authentically her. So I don't want to like pressure her to like change this thing about her. Well yeah. But that tail is good, you know.

Like that shit is fucking top tier. So what are you thinking man? I just don't really know where to go from here. Wow. You're a fucking racer for Christmas. This is awesome. And be like, you can use this one or two ways. Yeah, it's like whatever. Oh, I just found this. Yeah, this is so funny because this question boils down to like I Am dating someone and I don't like a couple traits of hers

Should I accept her anyway? Like what are your options here? Oh, I know is your answer is the right one. Yeah Yeah, dude, it's like I Got good news for you. If you try and pressure a girl like this, she will relish breaking up with you. She's waiting. She's waiting for some, for like a straight guy that she's dating to be like, why don't you adhere to some beauty standards? She'd be like, fuck you, you don't tell me what to do. Either way, either whether you go along with it or whether you fucking tell her to shave

her legs and she tells you to fuck off it'll be good for her like you're not changing this girl yeah you got nothing here she's the one who's pussy so good you're like you a guy who's never you've actually started thinking about feminism this girl's pussy so good you're like hey yeah I don't want to shave my legs either he can break her confidence he'd start thinking about dead people in the bedroom and his dick will be soft I don't know honey it's just the legs my animal instincts my brain but you're really sexy but my peepee yeah yeah dude I mean you're just this is just you hear it in his voice she knows she's got him on the razors edge yeah it's like no payment

yeah and it's like hey man this is the big leagues if you want hot goth pussy yeah this comes with this comes with and look I'm not saying it doesn't other but other is it other types of you know got, goth pussies and available, but it's like, whatever this girl's got going on, she sounds awesome and it's like, you're just gonna have to put up some hairy legs of that, I mean, some people, it sounds like it's not a problem for him, as of yet, you know what I mean under arms is even more cringe to me when people grow I got no and they let it fly and I'm right I love the two I would have I would actually prefer the arms to me personally yeah I gotta have a look I'm uh I don't think I honestly don't think as much you know at a certain point it's just what you can what you want to put up with and it's like or what? You're it's like hey do what you want, but it's not for me. I think You know not shaved look and I'm not saying like you know girls gotta fucking get a wax every day

But I just like I'm a little old-fashioned get some hairy armpits great, but shaved legs. I feel like I'm gonna need personally yeah, but hey, that's up to you. I wonder how old she is, not to call this a phase or something. That's true, I do know girls who definitely have a rebellious... How many girls who did this in their 20s kept it up into their 30s? Not that this will last more than like a few months clearly from the dynamic Establishment so maybe she makes tik-toks of her at protests. You know, it's possible she could get You know she get this under the Trump administration if she's at a protest, maybe they black bagger

Put her in take her to Guantanamo Bay for being at a anti-israel Yeah, they'll be a problem there yeah, so yeah, man, it's funny because there's really no question here It's just like I like this this girl. I like this girl. I just wish she shaved her legs, and it's like Okay, the fuck you want me to do about that? He already knows the answer. Like it's about, is he gonna deal with it or not? He's the only one who could answer that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's no, there's nothing to be done other than accepting this person as they are or not dating them. And my hunch is she'll probably dump you, so it won't be a big issue. But hey, good luck out there buddy. Yeah, if he gets dumped he can just constantly text her girls with their shaved legs and be like, yeah she's so sexy. She's so smooth. You like a goth?

What's, what's, do you have a type Andy? I really like Japanese girls a lot. Yeah, it's respect. Yeah. With, they're like, they're just. With regular tits with non fake tits It's not just like the looks it's like the demeanor and they're like the only problem I have is When you're in Japan Pearl Harbor

And then Hiroshima I actually went to the Hiroshima Peace Museum, oh, whoa, and it was fucking dark Yeah, dude I didn't know there's gonna be so many personal very personal stories. Yeah, but The problem is your dick's hard at the Hiroshima Museum The problem with the language barrier is all small talk and after a while like, you know small talk small talk small talk small talk and after a while like you know small talk small talk small talk small talk Mm-hmm. It's hard to have like a real spark when it's just all small sure when there's a language barrier language barriers tough I mean, we're like flirting with Google fucking trend. Yeah Are you gonna be an expat man you gonna go there you gonna wear a short kimono with Japanese wife

Like weebs and like the whole like You know an anime guy like there are a couple anime movies I like but the anime obsessed when their whole personality is that yeah, I don't like that I like I just how Japan works as a society and just how people behave It's pretty orderly. Yeah, some of it is scary on a work level. Yeah, everyone killing themselves because they've brought dishonor to their boss. But on a personal level, it's like super respectful

and kind and sweet, you know? Yeah, yeah. I fuck with that. Well, there are these white bitches out here could never. Passport bro Andy Milonakis is going to Japan. Yeah dude, it does feel... Japan is so interesting because everything you said is true.

There's so much respect and all this other shit, but then their culture is like, they work too hard. None of them are fucking, it seems like. Like they have a negative birth rate. Yeah. They're all like two, like, and it's this weird thing where it's like yeah, that's it's honestly the polar opposite Well, that's the thing it's the polar opposite of Greek culture It's like no one works at all But everybody's fucking fucking and having a good time and getting drunk and sitting on my cousin

I'm like I'm coming to Greece you want to go to a few islands. He's like yeah, I'm like it's gonna be like 12 days He's like I was like think I work. Yes, I can do work, I'm like, I'm coming to Greece, you want to go to a few islands? He's like, yeah, I'm like, it's going to be like 12 days. He's like, I was like, do you got work? He goes, I can do work when I get back. Yeah, exactly. Maybe you're onto something, maybe Greece and Japan, if you take the two extremes, it just makes a functioning society. You know what I mean? It's like, if you get that.

It's funny because those are my two favorite countries on Earth. And they could not be more different honestly. That's so interesting. That's so funny. I never thought about how we are basically the exact opposite of Japan. And I fought with Japan too. I loved it over there. It is funny because they also have this very polite racism.

It is a very racist place, but they're just like, no, you can't, no, only Japanese people here. But they're just like no you can't no and only Japanese people here They're smiling and they like I knew somebody who lived there and the landlord was like and of course We're gonna charge you six hundred extra dollars cuz you're white and not Japanese and they're like what they're like we I mean So like a foreigner's tax and the real estate person you have to pay like fucking 10k as like a thank you It's very annoying and expensive to like rent a place there. Yeah, sounds good man. You gotta fucking bring some Greece into Japan.

I love it. Hell yeah. Yeah, yeah. Alright, what else we got Eldis? Hey, I'm a big fan of the show. I got up to some shenanigans at the company Christmas party weekend. You know, one thing led to another. Accidentally hooked up with a co-worker. Accidentally, huh? She doesn't work for me. She's definitely a level below me and on the same team. So we work fairly closely. Um, she is 10, eight years older than me.

Maybe I'm 26. Um, such as great, but if we want to do it, but not, she's an intern from the local middle school right but everyone keeps doing it but not sure if i should and what the repercussions might be would love your advice thanks wow class this is classic stuff this is like this is classic stuff. This is like, this is the stuff that I'm mad I didn't have a regular job at any point in my life, because I never really got to experience the office holiday party. I'm sure, it sounds like maybe you didn't either, right? You were kind of just bouncing around. Did you ever go to a classic office holiday party? Not really, no.

Not really. Eldis, you're the only one, huh? Yeah, I went to a few holiday parties You ever take any shots at a co-worker. I never did I thought they're like The holiday parties I most of them like I was already in a relationship Yeah, people were getting fucked up, and you could tell there's there ever some drama was there ever some we found that Did you ever gossip at all? No, I never heard about any drama or anything In the moment you could tell you write this question

Yeah, yeah stop last our holiday party me you are two editors I We should have a stoppy baby enterprises holiday party Yeah, it's just we won't like get to it till like late. Jan. Yeah, or something. I like March somehow we do it on the road Yeah Okay, this is a classic thing here, buddy now My hunch is to say it's sort of like Vegas rules of like whatever happens at the holiday party stays at the holiday party and that if you had just

My hunch is like look Just take the free pussy the free Christmas pussy and move on don't make this a thing This is the cleanest way to go about this move on don't make this a thing this is the cleanest way to go about this move on whatever but you know he's 26 does he care about the shit fucking matters like the thing is like I think people are so caught up with like societal rules like obviously don't break the law and don't be like a fucking rapist serial fuck yeah like when it comes to like this might not be the right thing Obviously don't break the law and don't be like a fucking rapist serial killer.

Yeah. When it comes to like this might not be the right thing to do, but I kind of did it anyway. Is it OK? Like, bro, we're fucking animals, man. You fuck some chick. Keep fucking her or don't. Right. What do you ultimately want? I'm with you where it's like, you know, it's not like he really has that much power over

her. The fact that she's older is kind of fun. The fact that it's kind of bad, like kind of naughty is probably fun. Your options are basically like, the negatives are what if somebody catches feelings. It just becomes much messier when you're working together. Because the thing is most relationships like this don't work. And it's like ultimately it comes down to what is better, the pussy or the job? Like you're 26, do you really care about this job?

Do you have a foot out the door anyway? Do you want to work here long term if so? Probably shouldn't keep fun here, but if if not who cares and then look fucking her like Are you gonna remember wow and I lasted an extra three years at this job Remember fucking some fucking milf it was cool to fuck yes It was cool to fuck someone ten years older than you that is cool But does she want that also is the other thing you know what I mean like we only have hit like It's very possible this woman's like well that was fun like I feel like this is a classic move

People just fuck at the party and then pretend it's like the purge it's the sexual purge the holiday party and so take your cues from her does she seem down does she want to keep it casual if not do you want to date this person if that's the case are you down to have a secret little romance and do you care about your job how much do you care about your job? How much do you care about your job? Personally if I was 26, I got some pussy from a 34 year old I'm gonna keep trying to fuck her. I just am but I also never cared about my job at any point in my life So I thought because she is 34

He just needs to like play it cool No matter what and like you know if you're if you're like a 34 year old chick fucking like a 26 year old guy You know what's up, and you're probably not looking like settle down with your co-worker right so that's probably true I oh I often feel like usually in these situations I feel like it's the younger man who catches feelings because the woman's like well no obviously I'm just using you for that youthful prick I don't want to fucking settle down with your stupid ass although this lady is a sub works underneath him So she might be a dummy so who knows a lot of variables it comes down to do you care about the job more than you? Care about getting slurped off

You're gonna have to do that math yourself pal. We can't tell you. Damn I would have loved to fuck a lady in my office. I never did. A couple more nice ones here Eldis. Yeah, this is a longer one but it's awesome. Alright. Thank you so much for all that you do.... and twenty four and my boyfriend is thirty two and one of the first question to ask me if i've ever had a three-some and i have i've had to and

uh... he particularly had issues with three from that i had with two guys He asked me for more information about it, and I initially like sound the cuck alarm This guy hates it because he fucking loves it. He wants to watch you get fucked by two guys, but anyway He asked me for more information about it and Initially lied to him because of the look on his face he was very upset that I had I had a threesome with two guys and I had lied and said that I um did it with people that I knew and then like a month or so and I was like hey I lied to you um I actually like I lied to you. I actually like I

Didn't know these guys And this stems from I lied about my body count Who asks about body count this guy This is crazy to ask about a body count like early on is and then 30 to and she's 30 24. Oh, I didn't even think about that if you're that age and you're asking a 24 year old about her body count Come on, man. What the fuck are we doing here? The whole point is you're like you're supposed to Aren't you supposed to be like a fucking mature guy who knows this shit doesn't matter but in reality, this is a guy who didn't fuck when he was 24 and

He's just seething that also she didn't know him who cares what she was up to before you like that's crazy anyway I think we've like devolved as humans not just like you know in every single aspect yeah yeah not not that whole like prude thing was perfect like back in the day was like mm-hmm lady can I take you out on a date and you hold their hand and like yeah courting yeah court additional courting and she you might not get a kiss on the first day yeah yeah yeah like the thing is like certain things about that seem old fashion and whack but also I think there's a thing called sexual

tension that is actually important sure when when these motherfucking kids are like adults whatever are like swiping on tinder and the person just shows up and you instantly yes and then they leave like that's not as hot I agree with you there there is definitely like an immediacy that does cheapen things a little bit. I definitely feel that way about my personal, let's say, dating life. Yeah, there's something nice about going on a couple dates,

or even the meeting somebody and building up attention over time. Yeah. And just like you don't even know if you're gonna to hook up at all. Yeah, maybe you won't. Longing is very powerful. Yeah, and then when it happens,

then it can become magical almost. Yeah, yeah. But when it's just like, and this might be an unfair thing about this paragraph specifically, but like, I was just thinking about like how it is these days. Well, I agree with you in general, but I also think like, hey, at the same time, if you're gonna go have some fun that doesn't really matter, you know what I mean?

Like, yeah, like if I were to meet someone in a way that you're describing, where it's like, you know, kind of nice and Relationship evolves over time I'm not asking her how many guys she's fucked Yeah, and I don't want her to ask me how many women I fucked it's like that's not what this shit is about Like yeah, we both are adults who have had you know separate lives. We didn't really know each other Yeah, and it's like whatever it's like that's pretty much It's like what is the issue there? What are you worried about that? It's like yeah, do you like this person or not? That's what's important because nobody it's not like everybody knows

How many people are you worried about people judging them judging you either way you're worried about the wrong shit You're not worried about your actual relationship And it's like it's also to like get your feelings hurt that your girl Was a freak before she met you is kind of strange to me, too. It's like Anyway, let's figure out let's let's get to the absolute bottom of this because it's very interesting to me count and He was kind of like sniffed out the lie I'm already feeling bad for this but he then

you know we got over the lying thing. He understood why I lied initially and then he was Just upset that I had had this threesome with two guys that I didn't know I met them at the club You know I went home with them. I told him you know he asked me Well, why did you go home with these guys and you know it's like why was well I mean you know when I'm single like and I really vibe with them and basically it's we're kind of into our relationship and he can't get over it and he wants a threesome and last night at dinner he brought up hey would you ever like would you ever had a threesome. And last night at dinner, he brought up,

hey, would you ever had a threesome with me? And I told him, well, you know, we've had this discourse about issues of like, you know, I, when I had a threesome, you know, when I was single, but like enjoying that with you, I'm not sure if you're over that issue. Which is fair.

Take it out. I just don't really judge by this guy who's older than than me if and that wants to do something that I've done I was wrong for lying at the beginning. I mean, I'm wondering Is this a is this a flag? What's happening? Did I start off wrong because I lied and it? Muddy muddied the way I don't know. Sorry. I And it muddied the way. I don't know, Stavi. I love you. I love you, Elvis.

And thank you so much. I appreciate it. Bye. Yeah, I mean, so this is like, okay, the lying. She clearly feels so guilty over something that I wouldn't feel that guilt. Like, it's a minor thing, right? He put you in a, he asked you an uncomfortable question

that you were probably caught off guard by, and then you saw that it was gonna hurt his feelings, and you lied, okay. And then you apologized for it, and you explained why it happened. I wouldn't feel guilty about that. I personally think it is weird as fuck to ask somebody that you dated very specific, pointed questions about their sexual history.

I think it's weird on him. And look, if it comes up, you guys have been together, you're more secure, but he's almost like screening you and seeing if like you're worthwhile or whatever and it's like, did you do something wrong here? No! You were single, you had a fucking... You're not the type, it's not like you're the type of person who just like every weekend went out and fucked two strangers Isn't this the norm now? I feel like most people are just trash humans I wouldn't call her a trash human No, no, not her Like the people who are just just like are pressing their girls

Right any bus you were the yeah, just like like not everybody, but I feel like these types of like situations Where it's not always the guy that causes the drama obviously sure it goes both ways. Yeah, I feel like more times than not, there's shitty stuff happening in relationships more than like good. Yeah, no, I think you're right. And I think like even her feeling like she's done something wrong here and not being like,

hey, you've been really insecure and weird about a random thing I did when I was young and having a fun time and like, would I do it every weekend? No, but I don't wanna feel judged because I experimented sexually when I was just having a good time. That's not the energy I need for my boyfriend.

You clearly are insecure about it. It's stemming from something I don't understand. You're taking it out on me and now you wanna have a threesome in a way that feels almost punitive maybe? Like almost feels like well You fucked two guys before you knew me so now I get to fuck you and a girl and then we're even It'll never be even that like there's no even there's no even like competition here

He'll still bring it up after that. Yeah, it's like this guy. There's some strange going I definitely wouldn't have if I were you I wouldn't feel don't do anything you you don't want to do don't feel pressured You did not you did on it. You did nothing wrong and This guy seems very insecure right like and it's like, you know at the same time a little element of usually if you're like You're dating a hot woman. You're just going to assume. She's fucking more people than you

And that's the way life is man And it's like if you can't accept that if this guy's like well I'm I've waited all the girls my age fucked more than me But maybe if I get one young enough, I'll have fucked more than her and it's like if he's got that weird I am feeling some red flags from this guy in terms of insecurity, in terms of, you know, guilting him, and maybe, maybe the way you respond to him, clearly you're feeling guilty for something,

you didn't do anything fucking wrong because you had a nice time. Like, would he have fucked two girls if he could have? Yes. He just didn't have that available to him. So he's basically, it's like kind of jealous You know what I mean a hard no and just say that was that was in my past I don't want to do that anymore like a hard no and see his reaction that could be your answer of like though

He would probably flip out You can fuck you guys, but you can't fuck me another girl, and that might be your answer to yeah, okay peace out Yeah, I mean we don't have in all the information, but everything I'm catching here is like, this guy kinda sucks. He sounds like a bitch. He sounds like a bitch. He sounds like he's judging you,

and it's like, you don't want that from somebody you're dating. And you seem like a pretty, like a wildly reasonable person. Like, she's trying to talk things out. It's funny that you're the, you sound like you're the mature one and he's 32. Yeah, break up with him and then in two days just write on social media, just had a threesome, it was the best night of my life.

Go find two of his friends, fuck them. Get Eiffel Tower'd by them, that'll show them. Damn dude, that sucks. This fucking guy. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha This shaming every woman. You're not a ten, you're a three. You rank yourself. You rank yourself a ten? You're a fucking two and you're a whore and you have to cook for your fucking husband. You dirty slut. That's a podcast. Yeah, it's so weird. If some guy was zero swag whatsoever.

No swag, just like mad. I don't know what the fuck's going on. No swag, just like mad, I don't know what the fuck's going on. Yeah, those are so, that's a very odd, that's a very odd like, I mean I guess on some level, it is, it does, it is like kind of incelly rage or like, there is like, some women have gotten rich by, instead of being exploited by others, they just are like, well, I'm going to exploit my own body and make millions of dollars. And I think like, got some of those guys, like that's part of what's angering a lot of people. And then just like, you know, how you can't,

some like hot, hot women used to need dumb, like those podcast hosts used to be like pimps and like managers. And that kind of guy still weirdly exists where they're like trying to be like online pimps or whatever but there's definitely like a type of rage pointed towards women that I don't I don't fully understand what and they feel like they're not getting pussy and they're like instead of working on myself Yeah, it's not me Women who are the problem? Yeah, I mean manipulation works like both ways, right? I mean there are some like really fucking pleasant male human beings who are just getting manipulated for sure Yeah, toxic ass fucking females. Absolutely. That's also a tale as old as time but I mean the influx of like the incel population and just like Yeah. Toxic ass fucking females. Absolutely. But. That's also a tale as old as time.

Yeah, yeah, but I mean the influx of like the incel population and just like be horribly rude and fucking weird and fucked up to like females, that's like a big uprising in the population as well. Yeah. And it's interesting too because different cultures have different ways of like fucking up relationships. Like, you know, like in Japan they might be like, look down, don't ever look at a man. You know, in fucking Muslim countries your female has to be completely covered head to toe.

Like, there's always ways to make relationships uneven and fucked up. And different cultures have different ways of doing that you know And America is just like a hodgepodge of just being a horrible fucking person For sure for sure In some way like And don't listen Make funny videos online if you're a fat guy that wants to get pussy I think I speak for me and Andy

I think I speak for both of us Be a pleasant guy and make a funny video You'll get some pussy man or work on whatever your skill is and that's that's the actual secret yeah you can't have the mind of a fat guy no yeah in your mind you're like fucking Brad Pitt exactly exactly and offer something fun for them man yeah and don't be don't be a fat guy that smells and yeah That is true He's important for you seem like a fat guy yeah

Yeah, you ever see fat guys like it come in like a nice restaurant, and they're just like so well-dressed and just like Everything's look perfect. Yeah, they're fat. Yeah like That guy has aura. He's got an air about him. Absolutely. I love being that fat guy I love I love doing that for certain sometimes you're like, what's going on there? So yeah, that's what's important boys Work on yourselves, then you'll get pussy. We promise we did it look at us We're gonna fuck that girl hit us something to take us home eldest what do you say yeah here's something in the more sex positive direction perfect Well, quick question. So I've been in a relationship with a girl

for about five years, but I am bi. So I also listened to Tom Segura and Christina P's podcast and about a year ago, Christina went through this obsession of going airtight. And now I have that same obsession but it's gotten so much worse the past year I like just full on just want to be like ding-ding by a bunch of dudes. It's just an itch that isn't being scratched in this relationship currently. I also don't know if I ever could just because

she is a girl and I'm just having so many fantasies about guys. So what would you do in this situation? I really love this relationship but I'm just a little bored I guess and it seems silly to blow up a five- year relationship for a fantasy I guess. But let me know what you think. Try to keep it short. I know the girls are along with it. Pick me behavior. Throw the other girls under the bus.

No. This is the fucking chauvinistic incel possible podcast. Fuck all bitches. This is the fucking chauvinistic incel possible podcast. Fuck all bitches. You think you're tens, but you're fucking Jews. You dumb whores. That's right. This is chauvinistic podcast. And we're here to tell you that's God trying to get through to you.

You've been living in sin and finally you're returning to what you naturally need. No, I mean, look, this is pretty fun. And again, I always, I'm like, I get it as somebody who wants to fuck multiple girls. Like, fucking two girls at once is awesome. It's a great, it's like, so I get from the flip side wanting to be, if that's what, if being airtight feels like eating pussy while fucking a girl or getting your dick sucked

Or you know like while sucking four titties then that sounds awesome right and Can you work your way up to this can you do a? Some kind of strap-on situation with your girlfriend Well, you know there's a suction cup dildo to the wall that you're sucking on or something can you approach her with like it would she want to have a threesome is she interested at all in getting a guy in the mix like can you uh... he says it's a five-year relationship how sex positive are you here like

which she into any experimentation uh... well she maybe get surgically like a dick put on her? Yeah, will your girlfriend go trans? Just so you can get this one sexual fantasy off. Um... You know, I guess that's the question.

How into experimenting do you think your girl might be? And can you do some stuff with, you know, lesbians love a bunch of can you create a fuck machine? You know I've seen those where it's like a dildo going Back and forth well lesbians love sexual accoutrement You know can you get some of those in the mix will that will that scratch the itch? Do you feel comfortable telling your girl about this fantasy? Like how open with each other are you? This must be a... I wonder how...

I wonder the philosophy of people that date bi people is because this is something... Like I've known people who have dated a bi... Like I've known a woman who dated a bi guy and she was like, I would let him fuck a guy every once in a while if he asked me because that's not something I can provide but if he fucked a girl I would feel like that would be cheating right yeah that some people are like some kind of makes sense and look if you believe that great then you hit the jackpot right if your girl's like that but also another person says like no that's cheating and I get that too it's just it's in the eye of the beholder

I think like I've known friends in both circumstances. So you gotta have a conversation You could try getting airtight with some sex toys Just to kind of start feel it out. But you know, I wonder what it feels like to be by like I feel like We suck each other off and figure it out? Like, I feel like the thought of sucking a dick, like, I wouldn't do it for a billion dollars. Well, a billion. But I feel like getting my dick sucked by a guy, I feel like...

Knock that down to 2,500? In my mind, I'll be like, there's a mouth sucking my dick right now. How do I not get horrid? Yeah, that's no problem. And this is by the way, this is when the podcast gets very Greek. When we're both like, yeah, we can get our dicks sucked by guys. Who cares? Like, I thought about this before, like if I was in Thailand... Yeah, hypothetically speaking.

I've never been to Thailand before. Right, right, right. If I went to Thailand. Check his passport. Check the stamps. If I didn't know it was a ladyboy and I was getting my dick sucked and then like, oh, and then all of a sudden she was like, I'm actually a ladyboy. Yeah. And I'd be like, I don't think I would just get up and leave. No, no chance. Are you kidding me? Yeah. We have to Ladyboy Yes, it's a complete this transaction My dick doesn't get any less sucked by you if I don't come It's already been sucked. Let's finish this off But like if her if her him dick was out, then it changed the story, then I'm like,

I gotta get out of here. Sure, sure. Yeah, I guess, you know, I can't, I couldn't tell you unless I got that face to face with that, that prick, I couldn't tell you. I would be less enthused, certainly. But I don't know, you know? It'd be like when you get a Chick-fil-A sandwich, it has pickles, and I'm not a pickles guy. I don't like that I have to take the pickles off and

that I'm tasting a little pickle juice. It makes the sandwich a little less good. But I'm still going to finish it. Or if the chicken's too thick and it has hard parts. Sure. Yeah, yeah. Exactly. That's how I would see it.

Not my favorite, but. I'm never going to experience this, but my thought is to try to be truthful. Mm-hmm if a mouth was on my dick That sounds good I'm with you a hundred percent, dude So yeah, how flexible is your girlfriend? Can she get in the mix a little bit? Can she bend it back? Yeah, would she like to, you know, fuck you with a strap on while a guy fucks your mouth? Who knows?

There's a lot of interesting stuff to deal with here, but you know, hopefully she's as flexible as me and Andy. And you know, we're rooting for you. It's nice to have these sexual fantasies. And I think you can scratch the ish one way or another. But hopefully in twenty twenty five, you'll be able to get airtight with the consent of your partner resolution. That's your that's our resolution for you. What a beautiful year it's been. What a beautiful year it's going to be.

Andy, thank you, man. Christmasmas very christmas happy new year to all and uh... yeah thank you man is such it was it's a pleasure to have you on the pod we've been big fans forever so thanks brother yeah and finally absolutely thanks guys we will see you next year bye-bye cala Christmas! Happy Christmas!