Stavvy's World - #68 - Kyle Kinane

Episode Date: March 18, 2024

Kyle Kinane joins the pod to discuss crowd work comedians, crappy teenage jobs, working at the donut factory, his new look, merciless internet comments, sketchy cigs, how Catholicism is cool now, his new special 'Dirt Nap,' and much more! Head to https://www.factormeals.com/stavvy50 and use code STAVVY50 to get 50% off Factor's delicious, ready-to-eat meals. Check out Kyle Kinane's new special 'Dirt Nap' out now: https://800poundgorillamedia.com/products/kyle-kinane-dirt-nap Follow Kyle Kinane on social media: https://kylekinane.com/ https://www.twitter.com/kylekinane https://www.instagram.com/kylekinane https://www.facebook.com/kyle-kinane https://www.tiktok.com/@kylekinane https://www.youtube.com/@KyleKinaneOfficial Unlock exclusive, Patreon-only episodes at https://www.patreon.com/stavvysworld Wanna be part of the show? Call 904-800-STAV and leave a voicemail to get advice!

Welcome everybody to Stavisworld. What an episode we have for you guys today. I'm fresh, fresh from the gym, doing my little PT for my shoulder, getting ready to get rimmed. And unfortunately I didn't have a delicious Factor meal because I already ate them all. That's right folks we're happy to announce that Factor is a sponsor here at Stavisworld. Some delicious never frozen already cooked for you. All you got to do is heat them up and eat them meals. Head to factormeals.com slash Stavi 50 and use code STAVI50 to get 50% off. That's code STAVI50 at factormeals.com slash STAVI50 to get 50% off. And folks, our guest today, he's a delicious meal all himself The wonderful cock named why I just want to eat him up with his new look. I love the mustache

Yeah, you know you've got you out of you were a classic long beard Yeah, shaved completely guy, and I like seeing that you're kind of coming and like you're coming over this side I love it Let's come over this side. I love it. Normalize male pattern baldness. Normalize male baldness. I think it's coming back. I think honestly, my my my goal for my life has always been to look to

succeed despite every like like obstacle God has thrown at me. And I like looking as dumb as possible. And so I feel like I'm on the forefront of just like letting it go out. And I think the next move is gonna be, I'm gonna be bald until, I'm gonna just get this going until like 60, 70, and that's when I get hair plugs. You know what I mean? But I think we should get old men with incredible plugs,

but young men, middle-aged men, with just let it go natural. But that's like the, I think that's the balliest move. It's like, yeah, it's fake. It's fake. What about it? I think I'm gonna go wigs in a little bit too.

I bet. My girlfriend's trying to be pushing me like, who cares? Who cares? And like, it is kinda, I think I was like, Jason Alexander was on some, like he had a toupee. And I'm like, you got, he's like, yeah. Yeah, it was awesome.

That was- He just was owning it, yeah. I just never had hair. Yeah, you got he's like, yeah. Yeah, it was awesome. That was Yeah, I just never had hair. Yeah, I wanted some hair. I wanted to feel hair It was awesome when he did it though because he was on the he was like the most Documented bald man of the 90s him and Ben Franklin And then he just popped up with hair but shout out to him obviously that's the blueprint in another way Of course Costanza, but yeah, dude, nice to nice to him obviously that's the blueprint in another way of course Costanza But yeah, dude nice to nice to see you, but also just nice. I love thing you look dude. Yeah, I gotta flip it once in a while Whenever people are like oh, this is how somebody looks and this is what we expect from like that's when I gotta do something

Yeah, yeah, yeah, like sure yeah, and it's great the internet's great to let you know that your face is terrible Cool, man. Oh, yeah, I'm glad thanks for taking time out of your day Oh, yeah We got at least I would say 40% of our comments on all our episodes and videos or people tracking how much fatter I am in every episode we get we get a constant deluge of those and I don't usually that's It's so much that I don't read the comments, but every once in a while Just be like oh, how's this episode doing? And just immediately the first comments are always like,

he's getting fat as shit, God damn. When are they taking his feet off? Do you ever think you're responsible for it? Because you're a comedian, like when busting your balls, I'm like, man, I don't know. Yeah, we don't know each other. But then like, well, you're public figures, so I guess this is. Hey listen't know. Yeah, we don't know each other. Yeah, but then like well your public figures, so I guess this is

Hey listen, my life's pretty fucking sweet If some fucking if some also fat guy wants to momentarily feel better cuz I'm Fatter than him and he forgets every other thing that I'm better. I'm also more of than him. Yeah, that's fine with me I don't think that's part of what that's part of the service We provide here at Stavis World. You're some guy who just started exercising. You think like, like it is funny because when someone starts a new thing, they're always like so hardcore.

And there are people that are like gym guys. They're like, it's disgusting when you're fat. You're, you know, you're like, it's like, it's like a fuck those guys 100% 100%. But it's like, you know what, man, you want to get those comments out for the three weeks You stay on your diet great enjoy it. I'll be here for you. I'll be fat. I'll be you know I'll fluctuate I'll be your sin eater absolutely your sin Jesus I'm getting fat for all of you so you can take me down in the public eye who better than a fat sin eater He's hungry for

Oh, yeah, brother. I love I'm excited about the I'm like from outside Chicago So this is I'm at home right now. We got a lot of Greek diners in every main every like big city always has a nice Greek Greek diner Greek restaurant culture my favorite new joke that bombs is a house and has asbestos and I'm like not a Greek roommate You're right it sounds good Filly it worked a little bit Chicago a little bit of everyone's like, what does he mean? Yeah, just being you need a heavy Greek presence Yeah to get that for sure Nice to bought a house. Are you is it that because you also have a we should say special out right now dirt nap

Yeah, very funny You mentioned you're in the burbs that the house you're talking about with his bestest this one No, this isn't in Portland. Okay, nice Portland, but it's like it's pretty quiet. Yeah, that's all right, man. You're 47. Yeah Yeah, you know where that you know where the's like it's pretty quiet. Yeah, that's all right, man. You're 47. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, you know where the you know where the good time is tonight the porch. Yeah It's quiet. Oh, I get it. They're like what I don't need to be hanging out Like if I'm not doing a spot, I don't need to be like in the mix. Yeah, what am I doing? I'm in a relationship I'm old like totally chillin at the house. Absolutely

Yeah so but you did you went from cuz in the was it like the pandemic You were like out of LA and into the like Portland burbs. Oh, yeah, we moved out there We had like a chance to move up there and then we're kicking it there for three years And now we like like we got an apartment in LA to nice still in the mix. Yeah Yeah, I'm distracted by the thickness of this statue by the way. Oh, yeah, it's been commented Yeah, yeah, no, but it's awesome and those are cake back. Absolutely Yeah, the most the people don't see the back the back really nice. Oh, I'm looking at

And by the way, they they make that that's not a special order you can just get that off the Home Depot website, bro So if you want you need your home in Portland have to be greeted by two fat Davids I think there's not a problem at all you know without the front I couldn't tell was yeah yeah fat Dave we're so used to just yeah peeping them Jennys from from the south side all right dude thick Dave I like it he's a piece of ass for sure. I gotta be honest man, I've often talked shit about crowd work comics and everybody, no I wanna come clean, I gotta come clean. I know what I've said in the world.

No worries dude. But you should know that me and everybody including whenever the topic comes up, it's always like, damn it, but Stavros is funny though. Like I'm saying, oh yeah, Stavros is funny. But everybody's pissed at you because you made it look easy. I know, I know. So you've hurt a bunch, but everybody's like, fucking, he he's putting out shit making it look like that's all you got to do

I get it. I'm terrible. It's easy. It's like no it's a skill fully and so no no, dude I completely I completely get that like I think about it. Sometimes. It's like I don't know It almost feels like I'm America and I'm telling like China I'm like hey you guys need to cut back your fuel consumption I'm gonna use all the gas and natural oil possible to the third world doesn't get I really do feel like part because I know me could touch hot pots with her bare hands I really do feel like part because oh no, we could touch hot pots with her bare hands Burn I do think there was something that happened because like people were doing, you know, people were doing well People were gonna go on viral off crowd work

And then it was like I was most people just thought I was the second guy from come town and they're like Well, this fat idiot can do it. I can do it And so it was like I do feel like there was even Like my personal friends which kind of hurt my feelings. Yeah, they were they would see shit go viral They'd be like dude what what's going on? How do I do this and they're like they're opposed like three clips And they'd be like oh this actually this sucks, and it's hard work to do every day But I mean do you think I'm not I know I'm somewhat responsible for every like middle-aged

Dead-end Yeah, there's still craft to it there was I'm talking about how shit's not going Well, yeah, there's still some eloquence in there I do there definitely when I first got here ten years years ago there was a lot of canine karaoke going around a lot of horrible versions of you with no punch lines being like and like pretending to have a growlier voice than they did and like drinking IPA's on stage stage. Well, they missed it, man. Yes, that's why I got it. I saw it like and I'll watch

because like that, like this is scored up Scourge of it. It's like, you know, it's you know, it's improv where one person just doesn't know. Like that's why they say, remember how like everybody hates improv? It's the same thing, but the other person just isn't good at it. Or sometimes neither of them are. But yeah, remember out like everybody hates improv Or sometimes neither of them are most of the time neither of them are but that's what I want to say like I know I've talked my shit. Oh, yeah idea crowd were but they always come to the lab with Stav is good at it

Thank you. I appreciate it. Yeah. No, I do feel like I I do is you seem I get that a lot I'm like I like having a good, yeah. I don't like the, like there's a lot of crowd work that's like, the guy knows what he's gonna say. He's just setting you up. It's three card mansy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because then you're on the subway going, I can't believe I lost $20.

But it's like the opposite of joke grenades where it's on the way home, it gets less funny. Right, right, right. Oh, that's how he did it. Yeah, you see it, you see it for for sure and meanwhile. I just like to you know I I'm all I am genuinely curious about a lot of shit and also it was a mistake like I don't I was also someone who? Talked shit about crowd work, and then I was like I'm putting out a special I have no YouTube presence. Maybe these bullshit crowd work clips are working that they did and I was like, all right, I guess I'm

Joke but it's an Instagram real that's a live anywhere else ever again. This is a red It's gonna call me a hack for repeating my own material It's great comedy's in a great place right now. It's no way that it's bloated and gonna implode on itself Oh, oh dude. This is it's the fuck it. It's no way that it's bloated and gonna implode on itself It's the fuck it's the 1920s I feel like I'm I'm dancing with a flapper smoking a cigar and the fucking great depressions right around the corner 1989 I'm on the Sunset Strip And faster pussy yeah Right Nirvana's not tuning their guitars down the street.

Yeah, either way we're on the precipice, but let's, you know, folks, let's hope the bubble doesn't burst till 2025 where I will be doing a big theater tour. I'm taking this year off, but please God let it go until 2026 so I make a ton of money in those theaters. Are you full year off? full year off man full year from a serious tour like I The last couple years were just like too much and I did get I mean to our eagle-eyed YouTube commenters I have gotten too fat even for myself where it's not even like a I've talked about before it's like a looks thing. It's just like I'm starting to feel like unhealthy where it's like so I'm doing a full sober year. I'm doing a full

I'm doing yeah, nice. Yeah, I'm doing a full sober my 35th year of life gonna go sober And just kind of like I I mentioned in the burbs life because I got a place in Baltimore Yeah, and I think I'm gonna I feel the exact same way where it's like, you know It's like Baltimore's the burbs, but I'm in a nice little neighborhood I got a backyard and I feel like it's a lot different than living in a fucking three-bedroom where two of the bedrooms are your podcast studio So I'm taking a little time to just kind of zone out and also I feel like the material I Don't think it's sustainable. This like every every 16 months a new hour is just not I don't think it's sustainable this like every

Every 16 months a new hour is just not I can't I know I'm not good enough a comedy to do that And I don't have enough life experience to do that shit. It's like I want to just actually live that's the part of like If you say somebody pointed out like okay So new comics are talking about how everything sucks and a job sucks because that's that's your life experience You're a dead-end job and you're starting to stand up on it. Yeah, or not of like Okay, so new comics are talking about how everything sucks and a job sucks because that's your life experience. Like you're at a dead end job and you're starting to stand up out of, born out of desperation

or like I'll throw anything at the wall just to feel somewhat happy momentarily. Totally. And then the comics that start worrying are like, oh, all their jokes are about airports and hotels because now you're finally on the road and your life is just that. Or it's staying out too late.

Exactly. Man, I was in Birmingham in this crazy thing. I was in Chattanooga in Medi-Creat. Cause you're staying out and everybody, that's your job is to be out Friday night but that's everybody else's. They're gonna show you the craziest time. So that dictates part of your career.

And then you build a following based on all these crazy stories. And now if you try to pivot away from it, people are like, man, you're just not living anymore. It's like, nah, I just grew up. And that's okay. If I'm a good enough comedian, I can start telling stories about

just the shit that happens to me. Absolute mundane bullshit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I replaced a thermostat in a stove and I feel like a king and I'll figure it out But I don't want to have just an hour long set of like oh, and then it was for him somebody had ketamine But like we also were on city bikes. Well, man, the river's not that cold Yeah, I don't want that. That's like that doesn't I mean shit like that still happens

It still happens, but I'm ashamed of it. I'm ashamed now No, I'm with you where it's like yeah, and I just want to like, you know I don't even it also is nice just not have a plan and to just be like, you know what? I'm just gonna be a fucking human cuz I don't like and it's like, you know, you start whatever I we don't like to do too much comedy talk. Yeah, but it's like, you know, you start whatever I we don't like to do too much comedy talk Yeah, but it's like you but you start you start You start comedy because you don't want a job and then when it becomes your job, you're like, oh this sucks I just I just have to hit certain benchmarks

Like I'm a fucking salesman like I have to oh I better come up with 15 minutes before quarter for q4 or else I'm not gonna be able to get a Netflix special It's like I'd rather just take a little bit of time and be just a fucking bro and just fucking Chill out and you know look I think if you deal with my ridiculous You know my family and all this bullshit if you care about it You're always gonna be like oh, but I didn't write new stuff. Yeah, like also You realize like how? blessed is gonna be like, oh, but I didn't write new stuff. But also, you realize how blessed any of us are. You know what, I'm gonna not do anything for six months,

including not worry about how am I built. Nowadays, I'll try to do comedy in front of 28-year-olds that are just like, well, I'm $400,000 the middle class is collapsing. Yeah, we're embroiled in five wars. Yeah Middle class yeah, it's like a let them eat cakes It's my totally I try to do jokes about buying a house and I'm like, I'm 47 like like yeah Some people are grandparents at this age. All I did was the one And like somebody you own property I'm like what the fuck why don't we hate it landlords what I'm trying to relate How socks or it's gonna spurs

You guys will live in their squad and I don't care like I'm trying to win over 24 year old No, you're not you don't have any life experience either You trust fun kids throwing garbage cans through Starbucks No, I mean I know it's definitely like you don't also want to be the rich like talking about rich shit where it's like That's completely unrelatable and it's like I also think there's enough You know Everyone has their own like dog shit problems where it's like, you know, I'm not I do not have it figured out Like yeah, I have money but the rest of my life has completely gone to shit Like I'm just completely you know

So it'll be it'll be fun this try and piece it together a little bit and whatever comes out of it comes out Yeah, I lived an orphan's life for 20 years Found burritos Yeah, I'm gonna be alright with like yeah it's some finer ease it's nice a room that I have for sitting in Baltimore yeah what's the plan what's the plan for the spot let's talk about that dude HGTV well you know just got the grill set up we got a little garage I'm gonna turn into like an office gym situation. Okay, home gym.

Home gym. Gotta get shredded out there. Solo flex, loose weights. Loose weights? Free weights. Free weights. I work out a lot. Are you using loose weights?

You just got some big rocks you took from the park that you looked up? That's a Greek theme thing. Big rock, yeah. Sisyphus. Build my own Acropolis. I'm gonna build my own Acropolis on the top. Dude, I really do the old. Got the Lego Parthenon room. It is funny, the older, I don't know if you feel this way,

but the older I get, the more I'm like, ah dude, I wanna return to, like my genes are screaming. Like my, they're screaming for like. The fat jokes are lining up right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. G-E-N-E- lining up you fucking piece of shit my jeans quiet down eldest jokes are just out there it was a meatball over the plate it was but

they're screaming for like trashy Greek decor where I like I want like a like this Yeah, it's not far off from a painting I actually want to purchase of like the Greek like every old Greek guy has like, you know A beach a grease beach scene. Yeah, it's like kind of tacky artwork on their wall. I would literally want that in my bedroom I want marble columns. Like I don't know I don't know fountain. I would love a fountain I don't have the space for I mean, that's the thing. It's like the play the kids I grew up with there's always space You're right. I mean you know you go a little further down this neighborhood. You'll find some cramped marble fountain Yeah, I've had to walk around I've had to shimmy around fountains to get out of somebody

Absolutely. But yeah, there is I do feel the like getting older and the like the desire not the desire but the like almost inevitability of sort of returning to where you came from or getting closer like I feel like your youth is for like exploring and then you hit a point where you're like Gravity just pulls you back to where you came from and you're never gonna be exactly like where you were from or your parents or whatever, but you're gonna get closer than you were at your wildest, you know what I mean? I don't know if you're, I mean, when listening to the special,

it kind of felt a little bit like that where it seemed like you're talking about moving to the burbs, being out of the day-to-day rat race, relating to your parents, trying to relate to your parents a little more, like that shit. I don't know if you're feeling that way at all. Well, we've been children for much longer than I think any generation's been allowed to be. For sure. And yes, absolutely.

We've been absolute, just 12-year-olds. Yeah. Still, to this point now. And by the way, I think it's gonna change. I think this is one of the weirdest... I think that's gonna change. I think kids younger than us are more responsible than us the fact that people like it like Binge drinking isn't a thing like kids like I know more people like you still do comedy

I'm still hanging out people are 23 like now. I'm sober like like so you ever part of like no I did it Yeah, when they were like 16 Because I'm 20 years old and like who wants shots like oh yeah this is pathetic oh really like I'm already in a bar instead of at home with a family so where we going afterwards yeah nowhere nobody has money and we don't drink because you look silly I'm like oh maybe there's some lessons to learn like or just acknowledge that that's shit yeah they're just gonna be like nope life's gonna be real hard. Yeah. Yeah So yeah, I need to have my head on straight to handle it. Yeah, like and I want to fuck

Yeah, I did I wonder if like I'm curious to see what these gen Z motherfuckers if they like start getting married like 25 or if like If cuz it's like we grew up where when we were born the world seemed like there were endless possibilities and then it was like oh No, it was like it kind of happened after like I just feel like the 9-eleven to what this entire time Timeframe is just like oh, yeah, there's no progress There's no nothing but we at least had that idea and I think we were mourning that as a generation and then it was like Oh, these kids just never thought anything good was possible Like are they do they have the mindset of like a medieval peasant. That's like well. I'm religious. I need a wife

I need to you know what I mean like but it like people are just being Catholic again. I know that's weird That's bizarre and it's one thing to be like religious or spiritual or whatever and like no meaning but It's one thing to be like religious or spiritual or whatever, like seek meaning, but Catholic? Good job. Catholic's brutal. Good job on this new punk rock, because you got, I'm like, what the fuck is wrong with these kids? Like you did it.

Like if you're like, I do think it, it's the job of like, not the job, but like I shouldn't understand what you're doing if you're 17. That's true. I shouldn't get it. Which is. And you nailed it with the Catholic. That is true. That's a good point. You nailed it with that. That's actually a really really good point because if they just got like even more trans I'd be like oh cool

Yeah, but I'm very cool. We're no thing. I understand this progress, but if they're like unionized They're like playing Gregorian chants and like fucking like them like oh, I don't people at Harbor pedophiles like Like at least be the snake handlers. That shit was wild. The thing is, now, I'm not, this is not defense of the Catholic Church. Everyone else also probably molested. They just, I just feel like almost every other religion

also sucks a little child dick. But just the PR, the Catholic, the leadership, it was more grassroots, I would say, for other religions, whereas the Catholic Church, from the very top, they're doing the mixing and matching. From the very top, like, well, if you're gay, you're going to hell. What's the best way to hide being gay?

Be a priest. So no, you're not supposed to fuck. Also, here's access to boys. Like, it was dialed in for molestation. Absolutely. And like, just, I bet you they're having weird sex parties Just just you know like didn't the other didn't the other pope the guy the German guy who quit didn't he have like a He had like a man's servant. Who was just some piece of ass that followed him everywhere

I think I can remember I think he was just on some yeah Yeah, I don't know, but did you go so I'm guessing you didn't grow up religious at all. They were your parents Well, no, I mean like like CCD and stuff. So Catholic Sunday school I mean nothing happened to me, but it was yeah Like the one priest One priest like he's like always sick and that's everything he's got AIDS like what priest with AIDS Whoa, but and but this is all like the church is just a rumor mill. Who knows what's what like oh Everybody likes a good piece of gossip. You're right. That's the fucking Bible is a book of just and then we heard this

Retail it let's like let's misinterpret it in a different language and keep this gossip going It is a big game in telephone. Yeah. And I do like how everybody's gospel, it's like in each one, the guy who wrote it is actually a little cooler than in all the other ones. Yeah, yeah. And in the book of Matthew, his dick was all, he had a huge dick.

And Mayor Magle actually begged to suck him off, but he said, no, you're Jesus' slam piece. Or something, I don't really remember. It's been a while since I've read that particular book of the gospel Roy's almost got a good joke about like Peter's letter letter to the he's like you think that sounds like why is Peter just Here every week We're not writing them back Yeah, I guess to be fair the most I remember about like Yeah, I guess to be fair the most I remember about like

About God is from the last temptation of Christ both the book and the Martin Scorsese movie where it's pretty clear He gets pussy from Mary Magdalene and in my head. I was like, oh, yeah That's just a fact in the Bible and no one no actually religious person. Yeah thinks that but come on But I was come on. He's not gonna get a little fucking head I think that makes him cooler virgin birth dog virgin birth. Yeah that over it up. Absolutely I was that yeah, Mike my education came from like bad religion lyrics, which were just as obtuse as the Bible itself I'm singing so fast. There's so many Yeah These words are big. All right. I don't know this really isn't that fun

Yeah, hang out and drink beers in a parking lot course wash with my friends So you're so and you grew up in just in the Chicago burbs You said right where it was like and they they didn't make you like so they made you go to Catholic school Like your parents were just on some classic. It was that like on some classic like this just what you do Yeah, you didn't like you didn't have a kid that wasn't like dating On some classic, like, this is just what you do. Yeah, you didn't have a kid that wasn't, like they didn't, they went to church when they were little and it's like, no, you have to.

Same, yeah, yeah. I can't do as I say, not as I do it. Why aren't you guys going to church? We already went. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We already did our time, now you gotta go through it. And it was just like, which I'm not gonna argue with anybody trying to like direct their kid,

like this is like math, science, this shit, but here's an idea of this other aspect that's not necessarily in the book's education, but there's a part of life where like a moral compass and things like that. I think there's other religions or camps that can teach that without, also you burn in hell if you touch yourself, if you do Go in this little room Yeah, every all of it looks like a cult to me Yeah, for sure like all of it is like looking back and I think and it's not it's not edgy to be like

I know that's no it's edgy to say like I'm a Catholic. Yes, you've it has flipped. Yeah, you've got me Yeah, but right on that's what you're supposed to be doing I yeah Greek Catholics or Greek Sunday school was so funny because it was just like The Greek orthodoxy and we're the most chill Religion with Orthodox in the name for sure. Yeah, it's like no one really gave a fuck our like Sunday school teachers We're just like like we literally one of my Sunday school teachers Just like a guy who would like been to jail and said God saved his life and then he was like and his son was telling us like like almost like

The holy grail grail conspiracy theories about how like the virgin bird like this was like a kid in ninth grade Who clearly had heard this from his dad? Who was like? Yeah, you think the very was like the Virgin Mary had other kids He was like you think they he literally said the phrase you think they just sewed her back up And she was a virgin again, and and and it was like are you talking about the Virgin Mary's pussy, dude? and then the guy and then This is like and then the kid this is what the kid is arguing with our actual Sunday school teacher And the guys like the guy had no idea

What the fuck to say to that and he was like, yeah And my this kid who had heard from his father who was in jail who I guess God spoke to him about these things And that was like the level of like real and yeah, he had some theory where it was like well Yeah, got as soon as the Virgin Mary's pussy was busted wide open Then it was then it was open season for Joseph. It's just God got dibs on her pussy and as soon as and then so he was talking about how like Jesus had half siblings and he was just doing like this crazy like this is what the kids say and that was the fun that's the only one I

remember yes that was the only fun like Sunday school because they were not prepared for any blowbacks. Sunday school teachers were not prepared for any line of questioning from a third grader that's like, well, why would God make hell if he loves all of us? Ugh, ugh, ugh, ugh. It's complicated. I know. They have no recourse of any kind of question

that actually taps at the logic of any of it. Totally. And you're dealing with kids that are just curious and have like, well you just said this, so that would mean this. And it crumbles early unless, to me it felt like it's all crumbles unless you're fearful. Yeah, yeah, for sure. And that's where I'm like, fuck all that stuff.

Your whole thing's based on fear. And why are you questioning? And authority and all that, the classic shit. All that stuff. Yeah, your whole thing's based on fear. Yep, and like why are you quite an authority? You know, yeah the classic shit. Yeah, so that's why I think I gotta get away from this stuff Yeah, I didn't know like and I didn't know any Jewish kids growing up. They're just like or even fuck even just Lutheran friends Yeah, like church like Lutheran friend like we're gonna end it early cuz Bears games We're all like one step away from being full-fledged demons unless we talk to the guy where's his robes yeah that guy's in a sweater What is this? Yeah?

People are smiling why do you look like they're happy to be yeah, I don't know church. That's fun though So then and then you went from Catholic school You said drinking in parking lots and just you know hanging around yeah man it was like were you were you city kid or suburban kid city yeah in Baltimore okay in the city yeah yeah so it was not yet we didn't have the burbs but we did a lot actually the church was the like cultural center too where it was like we would get fucked up I mean that's the first thing I got drunk first place I grabbed tits no the Greek you know Greek well Italians Italians the name any Orthodox was like the yeah like they stuck together in the Greek. Did you go to Greece every summer? Yeah, oh, yeah, we had like a but not every server but always come back with pictures of paradise. It was incredible

We go for like six weeks. Yeah No, some people had to figure it out where they would work and then every Greek restaurant in Baltimore We just had to put a sign that was like gone for August yeah they were like sorry whatever you guys you know you guys are fucked yeah like a third of my friends group i'm like where oh they are they all want to yeah enjoy did you do any like Mediterranean paradise do any what was the summer vacation like for for the canaan family oh to canaan you guys hit the lake yes we got my dad worked for the airline so we luckily we actually did get some pretty sweet vacations. We got Jamaica a few times. Very nice. I went to Europe when I was like seven. That's nice. So it's like you don't

really know what you're doing over there. Were you an only child? No, like me and my sister. Okay nice, that's a little bit. But yes, I mean we got along too so vacations. Where are we? Germany? I don't know. Yeah. Oh we can eat all the chocolate we want because it's a vacation? All right, I don't know why it took us nine hours to Long to suffocate. That's nice. Where were Germany? Yeah Vacation all right. I don't know why it took us nine hours to get here, but I eat this chocolate Oh, yeah, dude, but yeah, it was a it was good on that and then just normal like It was real like with me and my dad would go to the Oshkosh air show. Oh, yeah Go to the old Oshkosh fly See them planes fly around was our family a car family, was it airplane family? Love that. And then uh

Did you? Drunk and like like all the friends getting like a campsite of the Yogi Bear family campground and yeah Absolutely shithoused and getting shut down by campground police every 10 minutes. Classic. Yeah, just the most the most suburban. Yeah. And like you resent it when you're like, right? Where's my Experience. Yeah. Yeah, this is bullshit I'm watching the basketball Diaries like man. I'm like, I don't I don't want to suck dick for heroin, but this Guy's got he's really living this guy's got a story Thank God thank God Well one time we threw like a full can of beer in the fire

Yeah, when the park police came by and it blow up yet, but like this thing's gonna blow up Yeah, and like burn the park police, but then it didn't so cool. Yeah, it was cool. We did it Did you have any like shitty suburban? Were you like a grocery bagger or some shit? Do you have any fun suburban jobs? I was a caddy grocery bagger or some shit. Do you have any fun suburban jobs? I was a caddy. Caddy for two summers. When you were like young as fuck or how old? I was like seventh grade. Oh wow. I'm like I'm little as an adult. Yeah yeah yeah. I was small. I like it really well like everything in caddy shack. I'm like oh this is big as me. My buddy like my buddy I would go with he would have to quit by the ninth hole cuz you get heat stroke I mean, I mean, it's country club, so they're rich and they're just kids just don't have like the World War two veterans But it's kids 11 years old. Yeah, why that's too young. It is funny cuz I was in Chicago

I was it I spent some time in the burbs I did I did like a indie movie that shot that told us was gonna be in Chicago and then it time in the burbs. I did like a indie movie that shot, that told us it was gonna be in Chicago, and then it was in the fucking, it was in the, it was Orland Park. I don't know if you know. Yeah. Oh man, oh. The Florida of Chicago. Really brutal stuff. Yeah, yeah.

Horrible, horrific. But I was shocked by how many golf courses suburban Chicago had. It was insane. It was like every fucking 10 minutes, there was a golf course. It's, you know, what are you gonna do out there? I guess we got what are you gonna do as a as a middle-class man who doesn't want to be around his family

For one of the two days From yeah Make an 11 year old carry your clubs. Yeah. I don't I don't I my own kids disappoint me Let me be bummed out by somebody else's can let me yell some other Slight child. Yeah for not Did they ever did the we do you have any golf knowledge? Were you like you should use the for I just wanted money I wanted to buy skateboards and shit Like this place allowed and of course like it's a country club that somehow is skirted the child labor laws

Yeah, the most child labor like this is like scooping ice cream. This is like Oh, it's gonna be 90 degrees out at 8 a.m. With you know, 70% humidity Yeah, and you're gonna go and I sucked at it too. I hated golf. Yeah Because then you're supposed to like help them like, oh, I think it went over there. And I was like, fuck. And so I was so bad at it. You're just not paying attention. So then they made me a thing called a four caddy.

Four caddy. Which is like, they would be in the cart, they would already have a cart, and it would be old. It was just my job to stand at the end of the hole and watch where the balls went, because they were old and couldn't see where they were. And I'm still like, you're putting me in a field. So like seventh like seventh grade. What are you like 12 13? Yeah, maybe around that. Yeah, maybe there

And I'm just like, yeah It's 8 a.m. And I'm gonna feel like I'm not watching these old fuckers And then I did that so bad they started giving me like all these carts had literal red flags on the back And I'm filing like what does that mean like oh somebody in the cart is a heart condition Oh, wow, that's everybody else in the golf course know like you see one of these kind of this Yeah, I'll corner your eye make sure they're not keeling over You know 50 yards Yeah, and after you were just I don't know what I'm doing

It's the rejects. It's like the old guys are gonna die in the worst caddies we have yeah Yeah, it's like we're trying to we need new member. We need fresh blood. Yeah Yeah, yeah as a real I got nowhere else to go kind of officer and gentlemen like why are you even here? Yeah, yeah, but then it was you were too young to have any other job weren't you yeah? But I guess so the fact that they let you were and then you had like kids that liked That were like ball-busting like alpha cat right right right? Oh, you're the best kiss ass. Yeah Yeah, and so I had that and then I was like I immediately I I thought the bravest people ever were people that were customer service in high school Or that worked at like McDonald's and had to see other people. Yeah, that's brutal

Brutal service service or any heart there was a kid. Oh, yeah, that's so true. There's a kid who worked at McDonald's There's McDonald's right across you from our high school. There was a kid who did that So was he a cool kid like did people like him? I feel like those kids were already well Did that was so was he a cool kid like did people like him? I feel like those kids were already well And like I yes metal honor Purple Heart for anybody that was like oh you're getting picked on in high school He was a door gonna get picked on for 425 an hour and there and there and then there was also like a kind of hot shy girl that worked there and it was Like everyone was just sad. There was like, oh she should

We didn't make fun of her Sucks like I want to beat off to her a little less now Your glasses you're beautiful. Yeah, he's so he's fucked. He's not part of the 80s movie where you guys get together He's wrong. Oh, he's so wrong Yeah, he's yeah, he had some definitely undiagnosed stuff going on Tism wise if I had to guess He really he really was like an old like an old-fashioned black nerd of like the like He had like the perfectly round fro I just I mean it was like Exactly who gets picked on at a fucking and you know I'm from Baltimore

So it was like you know it was a mostly black school Everyone's just a terror all the other kids are just terrorizing it and yeah, and that was the same McDonald's like Around there was a CVS which was behind that is the first place I smoked weed and they were playing dice They really like shooting dice in the parking lot It was like you can't be a fucking dork that also works at the McDonald's where all the like drugs and crime is happening And like not get viciously torn to shreds you what did you you you were like a didn't work at grocery store I was a cart boy I

Love that too cuz I remember you hit the back 40 and go wrangle up the herd Gotta get the hurt gotta get the the one with the fucked up wheel has a mind of its own We got a lame one out there I remember you at first you being excited and then realizing because didn't they make you join the cart union yeah you barely not when you're making five dollars an hour he's paying like three dollars I was working like 12 hours a week and they made me pay fucking Union from high school started working there and he just looks so bummed one day outside and I was like he's like what the fuck man what the fuck I was like what's up he's like I just got my paycheck it's four dollars and third oh he's just like and we're pro you you don't stop his world but come on they're

fucking 15 let the 15 year old like down in the dumps about Union Christmas is gonna be thin this Like dog you're supposed to be working for a super Nintendo. Yeah, I was used to those, you know plush $30 paycheck sounds like $4 I can't imagine Yeah, that is king shit when they made me join Union when I was 17. Oh, you're also What kind of Union I was 17. Oh you're also a union teenager? What kind of union? I was in a bakers confectioners. Hell yes. And I think it was I'm confusing it with like I always want to put tobacco and everything because it's the weirdest like the ATF like alcohol tobacco. I think it was bakers confectioners and tobacco workers. Oh, yeah, dude, but yeah, I worked in a great trio

We got to put it some dude. That's 19 year old me's dream. Yeah, it's fucking desserts and a couple camel lights Dude you weren't a fat kid if I worked as a fucking Baker's a child Oh, dude, you weren't a fat kid if I worked as a fucking baker as a child That would have been a tough scene. You weren't loyal to the Parliament's being Greek That was like either the color scheme like no Parliament when I was growing up I'm now someone's told me it was a lesbian cigarette But growing up I feel wasn't it didn't people say was a crackhead cigarette because you could like about you could like fit some It was yeah, it was like the way the like filter was you could I heard you like coke in there Yeah, the hide crack it makes that is the most

15 year old having a course But we were ports all right if you want your lungs to shatter All right, yeah, Newport's were always a little treat for us We were always like we were we we treated menthols like they were dessert Yeah, but we were our friend our good buddy big P. We won't say his name will protect his privacy There was a while where he was because we also would I think everyone would go and I don't know if this is the case For you eldest, but for me it was like when you're in Greece Yeah, cigarette like children smoke cigarettes in Greece to this day like it's still crazy

I European it's yeah the way like vapes now have brought back Nicotine for children like it just never ended in Europe like they just smoke I was in the middle like I like to be in like a neighborhood that's white, but like you're terrified Yeah, I was in the Midlands. I was in like Leicester, England It was like middle of a day when like oh these kids should be in school Yeah, but they're just smoking like 10 smoking and kicking a half inflated soccer ball For the cross the square not looking at you. Yeah, yeah Sharpening their knives. Yeah. Yeah

But yeah, I remember our friends would bring over these insanely heavy prints remember prints cigarettes, and then we became camel Turkish Turkish gold on the Turkish gold for a long time or blues were they blues blues blues or later? I think like and then not made high school and the Marlboro 27 That was bronze package bronze bags. They were a little shorter Who that with the bronze package bronze bags you they were a little shorter. Yeah, yeah, those were tough But that's when we felt really cool I used to work at a gas station and with like the pull down rack and so I'm like, that's how I started smoking I'm like everybody else by the And I was man I got to I was a cools guy for a minute

100% From Eddie Murphy in trading places going, who put the cools out of the floor? I'm gonna smoke cools. He made it sound cool. I'm gonna smoke cools. And I thought, and also nobody would bum off of you. True, yep.

Oh, you want a cigarette? Here you go, here's bootleg Newports. Here's shittier Newports. Or people get, then I moved to generics. Mmm, and I loved Interesting my door out whatever. Oh I mean I made jokes about him already, but you'd have to carry like a hair tie cuz the box would fall apart Like somebody just licked it closed the box. I love it. I keep this wrapped up Man, yeah, you felt like an adult doing this to cigarettes

And then I mean I only smoked for like a year and a half is purely to seem cool And then obviously and then I'm like and then I would just obviously do the classic just smoke when you're drunk kind of thing Which I still to this day enjoy. Yeah one from time to time Well really quickly before I want to go infectious, but I also want to say for our listeners Great shot of Jamie Lee Curtis's tits in trading places So anytime there's an opportunity to let people know when you can see great titties She's really looking great in that and they are fat. They are fat and they hang just right I remember getting head while watching that and it was one of the finest memories of my life

In the shitty little I had a shitty little room in Baltimore with a Very tiny TV and I just remember being like gonna Yeah, I was like, you know when you're doing that like comedy nerd thing of like, let me show you the classics It's like training places and like, you know, then I later showed a girl younger than me catty shag And she was like this sucks. You're old Damn buddy. That was the first step and that was gotten progressively worse we talked about needing to grow up like I like I I was a girl that I went on a date with we were back here and I just I don't know I just threw on rush hour I

just threw on some like fun dumb movie and she's like who's that and I was like Chris I was like oh Chris Tucker she probably doesn't know Chris Tucker whatever that's kind of yeah I threw on rush hour took my shirt off yeah yeah yeah started doing karate I got an early morning tomorrow let's go but then she didn't know who Jackie Chan was and I was like oh man this this is fucked up you know what I'm gonna I'm gonna say Any woman under 30 doesn't know Jackie Jackie Chan is he like so famous maybe yeah, man Who that's a good point? I guess I guess a 25 year old Yeah, what is Jackie Chan made that would pertain to a 30? Life in any sense I guess you're right. All right. All right. I feel a little a little less bad a guy who's known for doing his own stunts

I Guess that's fair. I guess that's fair. Yeah, Jackie Chan's not so bad. I guess rush hour was just a classic from my childhood That's like somebody. Yeah, what's your what's your favorite? See a song like this. These are my references Yeah, every song I don't recognize I assume is Taylor Swift Every song you'll recognize in a target is Taylor Swift. Yeah, probably Flip and say it's alright if they don't know Jackie Chan is I guess you're right I remember when lethal weapon 4 came out where like in fifth grade That's how like the late rush hours are for zoomers, you know? That's fair. That's fair. No, you're right. It's just a I could probably come up with a better example of my

Feeling my mortality with a girl. I'm on a date with not knowing a reference But for now, it's it's rush hour folks come back on another episode when I'll really think about it But if you're gonna hold to anything that's formidable when you were yeah when you were 15 you're about to get aged out of a lot of shit yeah no you're right you're right guys don't like John Cusack's solid run of 80s maybe Keanu is enough maybe the Matrix is one, but anyway, anyway, whatever. Hopefully I'll live a long time and be dating women much younger than me and embarrassing myself for years to come thanks to the nutritional value from factor meals. Boy oh boy, do I love factor meals.

Not horny anymore but hungry? These are ready in mere minutes. Yeah, sometimes you bust a nut and you think to yourself, Jesus what am I doing? These girls don't even know who Jackie Chan is. I need to get my life together and that starts with factor meals and nutritious meals. They got it all. They got different types of options. Calorie smart, protein plus protein plus keto whatever you're doing

I actually tried you know I've talked about I'm going to Baltimore. I'm trying to get my life together So I got their low Cal Options they were incredible stop scrolling all this for Christ's sake let me read the ad pairs with bad boys to a blue ray Factors low-cal it was a little units for a man brother. Thank you I had I had I should know the names but there was like the chicken breast was juicy with a little mashed potato had a Had some garlic green beans in there. There was a beautiful pasta dish. I sucked it down real nice after Having a nice workout. They got it all, it's not just, you know,

whatever you want, they got pancakes, smoothies, more. A wide array of shit. A wide array of shit. And it's nice, it's already, it's cooked. It's never frozen either. You just, you fucking heat it up and that's it. You don't got, you know, we're on the go, we're on the go gentlemen here, we've discussed it.

You've barely chosen which season of Night court from the box that you want to start up by the time this meal is hot and ready. Uh, what's up, my, you want to watch Martin reruns? I've done that a lot. I actually have, you know, Martin might be it. Uh, uh, anyway, uh, they're nice, whatever you need to do. Uh, I like it cause my schedule, you know, it flips around a little bit Sometimes we're pod like they've actually been great when we're podcasting because we do a lot in the day

We try and you know We try and do I like to get in a rhythm with the pods and you pop them in You pop them in you heat them up you eat them and then bam you go from talking to Kyle You talk to Ian finance afterwards in rain Racine right afterwards with the nutrition you need I love I truly do love Factor I'm excited to try more the more a bigger variety of the low of the low Cal I they just sent me a box and I liked there's a random box I'm a picky eater I'm a bit of a an asshole when it comes to what I eat and I like them all like the pasta dishes I like the the chicken. I like the veg the veggies are nice sometimes when you get these pre-made meals

It's like you know shit's mushy. It doesn't add up this shit was nice, bro crisp. I loved it Head so if you want to try some factor meals we boy do we have the deal of a lifetime for you folks throw throw on now. That's what I call music Kyle said it had the factor meals calm 50 and use code stoppy 50 to get 50% off your order that's code stoppy 50 at factor meals dot com slash stoppy 50 to get 50% off go try a go try a delicious factor meal right now folks alright well I'm hungry just talking about it I really am I'm fucking starving Kyle walked in and I was making a really fucked up like leftover shrimp and yogurt wrap I don't know what I was thinking. It tasted like shit. I wish I

But I was like whoa. No, it was like our first interaction was you watching me one of the most fucked up meals I've ever had I thought it was yeah, I got so I thought I was ambrosia salad I thought it was that yeah, I get so I thought it was ambrosia salad All right, man, you know athletes train differently Like I just came from the gym. I'm like, oh man his synapses are fire Flavor yeah, I'm just putting some marshmallow in my system. He just created voids with that workout You know, I'm not a nutritionist of course if only i had a factor meal truly i would want to and i wouldn't have had that fucked up weird shrimp salad but um anyway kyle why don't we use some of your ex some of the expertise you've amassed over the years to help answer our questions here for our friends and

hopefully sneak in some uh i do want to hear more about your confectioners background Eldest maybe we can find something dessert related. You know I don't want to I don't want to you probably won't be able to Yeah, I don't think I used to I used to work in a doughnut factory. Oh like that's the most Willy Wonka thing I can say about my life dude again if I was there. I'm fucked most Willy Wonka thing I can say about my life. Dude, if I was there, I'm fucked. 17 years old at the donut factory is tough. They all thought I was, because I was just like,

I didn't want to work customer service, so I just went to all the warehouses. I'm like, I'm 17, fucking break me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I want real money, and so it was like the, like deep freeze, like mass produced donuts, but I would just eat them because I'm 17, like oh, lunch break, like donuts.

So all, because it was all primarily like Latino workers. And so they first thought I was the boss's kid because I was the only white guy working there. This weird like move around shift. So they hated me. And then once they found out I wasn't. A donut factory nepo baby. Yeah, yeah.

I was about to cash in on the Clyde's Delicious Donuts fortune. I just learned a few real world skills before I go to boarding school, you know? But then they found out that I wasn't the boss's kid, so they thought I must have been the most worst off white kid ever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so I would, because then they just saw me eating like the fucked up donuts that got cut in half by the machine or something. Oh, he's the poorest white boy We've ever seen so then they would feed me stuff from all their homemade lunches

So all it was all it was donuts and homemade Mexican food That's a nice combo right there. I just ran around a donut factory for like and I was making like 14 bucks an hour like yeah, this is like that's a way Damn yeah, I was like oh, this is the best. That's all yes. That's my confectioner back. That's a way brother. Yeah Goddamn. Yeah, I was like, oh, this is the best. That's all I guess. That's my confectioner back. That's beautiful That's a beautiful story right there and you're yeah, you got a nice you got in your pockets nice. Yeah lined your pockets red Alright, I'll just let's fucking let's let's let's answer some questions here, buddy Hey, Dobby Elvis you beautiful twink. Yeah, right. Hey, soubby. Elvis, you beautiful twink.

Yeah, right. Hey, so, in his heart he is a twink. My ex and I broke up probably about two, three years ago, but we still train jujitsu at the same academy. There's no animosity between the two of us. We maintain like professional friendship. But recently, she started dating one of the other guys at my academy Oh happens to be a friend of mine that I've been training with for Probably six years at this tough and I don't know why but I

Feel I'm feeling some kind of way about it. I'm feeling like a little disrespected. I don't know Maybe it's my own principles. I don't date anyone I train with. I don't really believe in dating people you train with unless you bring them from outside. And since we've been broken up, I've dated exclusively people outside of the academy. Pause this, pause this, I'll listen.

He's like, I don't believe in doing anything that wasn't exactly what I did only the situation I did was okay if you bring the put if the pussy is grandfathered in then they can train jujitsu but you are not allowed to fuck someone that would hurt my feelings so very very funny start so far but go go ahead. Let's just finish. Let's hear him out Just because it feels kind of weird in high school quickie Also don't I believe in not shooting where you eat Yeah, I don't know am I in the wrong to be a little irritated and disrespected that those two would

Date especially my buddy dating her considering he knows our background and that's five years. That's something I don't know why I Just find myself a little irritated and bothered. It's not even jealousy. It's just a little like Pushing my principles on them. It's not your, and maybe I'm wrong. I don't know You know this is this is awesome you've done this yeah, we got it we got it Is there a whole thing about like honor and discipline? Yeah And mastery of the self like fucking deal with it, dude. Yeah, I know Yeah, it's like it is funny that it's like, yeah, who knows?

It's not a climbing gym. You're like, you're training in the ways. Also, it's just like, dude, here's what's pissing me off. He's pretending it's about some kind of moral code that he's mad about. Stop. I say this all the time. It's like, don't lie. You cannot lie to us.

That's the one thing I will not. That's the one thing I will not accept on this podcast. I always say we're like we're like their defense attorney Yeah, you gotta tell us what happened Okay, you know tell us the truth assessment and we can we can we can kind of massage it for you Whatever, but we need to know the truth The truth is you don't fucking care about you what you are and look like okay If this was a girl you hadn't fucked and he started dating a different girl at your gym, would you be this deeply upset about your principles?

Would you be like, hey Todd, this is where we fucking learn how to do Kamoras. You're ruining the vibes. No, so that's what I'm saying, be honest here. I'm guessing the other guy is better at jujitsu than he is. That would also be tough. If the other guy was where he'd be like All right. Yeah took a step down touch

Dominate some of these dudes. Yeah, he said this guy trained him for six years trained him or trained with him trained with him I thought it was yeah, so basically all that's happening here is that Here's where you have you can actually be a little upset in my opinion now look here's everything he's your friend is he your friend like you just take the same classes do you guys ever hang out outside of the gym like if he's your actual boy because if he's your actual boy you can be annoyed that he at least didn't have a conversation with you that it wasn't like, hey man, just so you know, this is going on, like we're friends, I just wanted to let you know.

But the reality is he's not, like you're saying don't shit where you eat, but it's also like, well these are the people you see. If you're like a fucking jujitsu freak. It's like comedians dating comedians. This is just all what we're doing. Yeah, in my free time I'm like hey, let's go get lunch Let's go this thing we see each other at this mutual interest

But we never shared interest when we be friends outside of it right right right and so it's like and so it's like you know You want to if you were like that's a great example of like a comedian that I was friends with like Fucked so you know whatever my ex it was, it's not about us being comedians together, it's about him being my friend. But if some other guy who just happens to fucking do comedy that I don't really know that well, but I see him at shows, did something that would be annoying of a friend did,

that's different, right? But also like with them, it's like, you're around people you see. And the comedian example is good too, where it's like, yes, sometimes it's a bad idea to don't shit where you eat But that basically means don't be a dickhead to these people like if you if you feel a connection with somebody that you have a strong You guys are both into the same things you both train at the same places Yeah, it's gonna happen where sometimes you date people within your gym or it's gonna happen sometimes like yeah some of the most disastrous

Relationships are comedians dating each other, but some of the best ones are too, right? Where it's like, you know, Joe List and Sarah, like it just happened, like I have friends who it's worked out for them, and sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. This isn't about your principles though. It's the point I'm trying to make.

And I'm not saying like emotional maturity lightly, like grow up dude. It's a tough place to be in to go like, oh, here's somebody I've been with for awhile, it didn't work out with us, but I still care about them enough to see them be happy, and if it happens to be with that person over there, they've gotten to know that person,

well like, you gotta let it happen man. Yeah, and that's a beautiful perspective. I'm not even that mature. I'm just like, yeah. I'm not saying I am, I'm saying somebody else do. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Do as I say, do as I do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I do think, I guess what it really comes down to

is you can be honest with your feelings here. And your feelings are not about what's right in the jujitsu gym. Your feelings are, your ex, a serious ex of, what do you say, five years, is dating a friend that, like, we don't know how close a friend is, but let's say he is a good friend and somebody you've known for six years, that, and he didn't even kinda, the violation here

is more on the friend, right? Yeah. But also, you guys broke up, what, he said two to three years ago, like, it's been enough time, and they don't really owe you much, they could have just, they could have given you guys broke up what he said two to three years ago. Like I think it's been enough time. The vibe like, and they don't really owe you much. They could have just, they could have given you a three years is like you're out for sure. She didn't just dig, turn and burn for sure. If you're that bothered by it, go three blocks down the street to the next

June, June, June, June, find them, find the next abandoned TCB. Why? That is now a dojo and start there. It's not like these things are scarce. Yeah. Yeah, so that is absolutely you could yeah ultimately And this is again a classic thing where we say no one's in the wrong here But ultimately if this fucks up how you feel about that gym go to a different gym but Be honest about what you're feeling irritated about. And I think all you're feeling

irritated about is like, if this guy's truly your friend, he does, in my opinion, even though two to three years you're out, he owes you like a little, hey man, just so you know, me and whatever are like, you know, I'm sorry, I know you guys were together. I don't want I don't want you to find out in some weird way like I feel I figure it's been long enough that's what you're upset about and by the way even if you had that conversation with you it's not like you would be like oh cool you're still probably a little you still have some residual feelings anyone who's like we maintain a professional friendship I don't know that it's healthy necessarily to like have seen your ex like twice a week for three years like you that probably doesn't help your closure you getting over it

And so you have some lingering shit that you're recognizing Oh, maybe I didn't fully get over this and you just feel a little wronged by somebody that you feel as your friend That's what's going on here. It's not don't shit where you eat out of the sanctity of the fucking Thank you. I think there's like this honor and everything like you eat out of the sanctity of the fucking I think yeah I think there's like this honor and everything like you're calling it the Academy That you're holding this in can be a little bit more pliable for sure I mean look unless You're in a social circle exactly unless you're training to be in the UFC But that's not the vibe which they're all right

Everybody go to an open mic. Yeah, Yeah, they're gonna get a special. Yeah, so good luck buddy And you know, oh, here's the other thing. I Guarantee you if you're getting sucked off by someone else. You don't care at all That's another thing go unless if you're if if by some situation You're in a relationship and you give this much of a fuck about it, there's a lot more going on. Throw yourself into a trivia night or two. Get away from the Academy for a minute and go see what the other half is just trying

to like with their greasy chicken wing hands are trying to scribble answers down. Absolutely. Find out how they're living, you know? Open your horizons. Give me another one, Eldis. What's up, Savvy Baby? What's up? You know, open your horizons. Give me another one, eldest. I'll start a baby with a guest with that Albanian machine.

Yeah, so I've been having problems lately with my mother and my wife has, but my wife is the reserved, quiet, keep it all in tight. She doesn't like to let it out. She doesn't like to have conversations about things. She hates confrontation. So whenever she tries to have a conversation with her mom, it always gets flipped on her, even if her mom is doing a thing that's wrong, which most of the time it is. But the biggest thing, alas, we've been together like seven years and since she got

a divorce with her ex-husband, my wife, basically my mother-in-law has been spending a lot of time with him. Oh, that's crazy. She claims so she can get time with the kids more. All this crazy stuff, but we ended up through roundabout ways, finding out that they kind of had a thing they've gone hikes together. That's that because she felt bad. They're always texting and talking and hanging out to get each other gifts for random

stuff. He had braces. He got his braces off. She gave him a gift basket. Obviously, like, yeah, I'm a little bitter but I go through surgery So if nothing ever happens, why shouldn't give me anything to say anything but clearly there's something going on We read some text messages to while our daughter was on her phone We saw messages coming in from him. Well, my wife didn and she looked at it and they're talking they love each other all the stuff Anyway, that's messed up as that is My wife tried to call her out and then my wife gets in trouble because she was looking at the phone or whatever and it's

always flipped on her and it's like well, it's not weird that we hang out because Could be the same as your dad and your grandpa hanging out. But clearly it's not the same thing Oh, yeah, she's trying to suck your grandpa's dick. At this point I just don't know what to do because there's so many times where I want to say something to both of them but my wife doesn't want me to and so I'm respecting that and every time my wife tries to talk to me about stuff and saying she's uncomfortable, she either flips it on her or turns it around and and She said oh, okay, and then nothing ever happened, so yeah, thanks

Brutal stuff this is fucking crazy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that was thick with drama. That's tough stuff. When did he send this? I just want to know thank God. This is a free episode all right. It's coming. It's coming out soon brother Yeah, man, we gotta get to this I mean, it's coming. It's coming out soon, brother Yeah, man, we gotta get to this I mean it's coming into the ER Insane your your mother-in-law is a fucking insane person This I feel like this has happened. I feel we've gotten called like this and also this is a weird dynamic like there are one thing I never understood I guess cuz like I Come from the classic like there's different I guess because I come from the classic,

there's different parent configurations. I come from bad dad, good mom. So I can't imagine a bad, in my head it's so tough for me. And basically, all my friends, it's like, well not all of them, but there's a lot of good moms and a lot of bad dads in my friend group.

So it's hard for me to imagine, but one of the most fucked up types of moms is the mom that sees her daughter as competition. That's one of the craziest types of fucking old whores out there. And this woman feels a little like that. I think there's like some of that going on here. She's clearly a fucking dumb bitch.

I mean, there's no way around that. All the lying and the, oh, you don't say she's manipulative and flips it on. Yeah, I got a little confused about the reading the text messages and what was going on. So basically what was going on is they were, their little kid. They got a relationship, the mother-in-law has a relationship with the ex-husband.

Something. Because the kids are there. Now, theoretically. This is where I gotta step back. That's her cover. Okay, yeah, we don't know the context of everything. You know, it's always like the am I the asshole column. I've read it where you're like, yeah, you are, man.

We don't know like, I don't know your wife's history with your mom, nobody knows somebody else's history with their parents if it's complicated, maybe they just don't like each other. So it's like, well, it's easier to see my grandkids and that's the most important thing than grandkids. I just wanna see my grandbabies. I'll do anything it takes. We don't like each other. So it's like, well, it's easier to see my grandkids and that's the most important thing that grandkids, I just wanna see my grandbabies. I'll do anything it takes.

We don't have a relationship, but I need a relationship with my grandkids. It sucks for this dude, cause he's on the outside. I think how I'm reading it is that like, is that basically the mom at a minimum just likes the ex-husband more than both the current guy and her daughter yeah and and at worst that happened definitely parents not like their kid let alone 100% the guy the

person there with 100% and and and like that's at the lowest end and at the highest end she's secretly fucking this guy, right? Like that's the that's kind of the range that we're sort of like that's the Just go back to the same advice we gave the first call and be like well emotional maturity. Yeah You love some you want it to be happy too, so if your mom needs to fuck your ex-husband Be like we're being hypocrites right now. If we're telling this guy it's entirely fucked up. But the first guy, hey move on dude. Move on, your mom's fucking your children's dad.

Move on, grow up. Yeah, grow up. So, yeah, so he's dealing with a couple different issues here You've got the dumb bitch mother-in-law which a classic a tales old this time, right? But the real issue here is for him is Getting his wife to come front because he's he sounds like he's chomping at the bit to go at this old bitch and yeah And her and his wife doesn't want to do that. Well it sounds like maybe, yeah, his wife, the daughter, already has some context where she's like, I don't even want to deal with her.

Like there's already... I wonder if that's the case, or I wonder if, because this is also another classic situation of like, her mom just sounds like one of those parents that's like selfish, does whatever the fuck they want It's kind of manipulative you get to and look again. You're right. We only have one side of the story here Yeah, but I do think the first step in this is like your wife has to start Really thinking about her relationship to her mother. I mean if this does that cuz this really isn't You do kind of have to take your cues from your wife here

But I would I would personally try and attack it at the base of shit where it's like This feels like some classic therapy shit This feels like some shit your wife needs to go to therapy and with the specific Intent of discussing her relationship with her mother because this is insane and you're also like it's okay for you to have your feelings hurt um as just like a son-in-law of like what the fuck bit like that is weird like if i'm in a situation Yeah, and then like this woman loves the guy before me. It's like, all right. Well, your your fucking daughter picked me She doesn't want her want him in her life. You're being, other than like the co-parent. But that's what, are the kids still cool with this guy

and the mom, or are they also, are they being turned against them, or are the kids like, yeah, it's pretty weird that our dad, but the kids only know that it's mom and dad. They don't have the sides, it's mom and dad. And dad also, we get to hang out with grandma. I don't know how old the kids are, I don't know if the kids realize that like you know when you realize like oh, that's my mom's mom And that's my dad's mom and first you like just the old people It's funny when a baby just thinks his grandma's a different lady altogether

Yeah, and we finds out it's his mom's mom's like what the fuck oh wait you have you're the guys know each other Oh, wait, you have, you're the one for them? You guys know each other? Yeah, yeah. Oh, you're the one for that, that's for me? Oh, wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That is always such a funny moment when a baby puts it together and he's like three

and you're like, what? You guys have known him? Yeah. Oh, you guys came from different, you were just adults when you met? Yeah. Wait, you guys weren't just babies together? My parents weren't babies together?

So I don't know how old these kids are and like what the context that they're like sorting this out themselves and But yeah, I got no clean answer for my man here. I mean, I really do believe it's a little It's like you just got to start with your wife and her relationship with her mom That's the that's the absolute center of all this and like cuz my I would love a situation where you fucking tell this old lady off and even like Her it sounds like your wife might just have a weird bad relationship with her mom And I think that's what's that's what's here And that's all you could do is kind of support your wife through that I cuz as things are I wouldn't be the guy who sort

of like Tries to be a cowboy about this and like tells the old lady off yourself I think you have to just support your wife into into Examining her relationship with their mom and what she wants and that's tough when people a lot of times people want to be in Denial if they have toxic parents because it's easier to just be like well that's just my dad that's just my mom but sometimes they're bad for you man yeah cuz trying to excavate all of it is like and it's a lot I don't want I don't want I am replacing happiness with contentment is like like very easy and also like its own disease I think of Yeah, I mean I bring it up a lot about being Midwestern like well trying to be happy takes work Right be like yes making the best of it. Yeah. Yeah, right like well, but don't what didn't you want to do like more like?

But like all right, I'll drink a 12-pack yeah, I got like the good cable pack Yeah, I just keep flipping till I fall asleep do it again tomorrow Yeah, yeah, and listen your wife might after going to some therapy thinking, you know doing the cost-benefit analysis She might just be like it's easier not to but she has to decide that and not just stay in her own patterns to me That's what's good. Look, maybe I'm a little little biased I do I do think that it's important to like I Think it's important to really think about if you have a parent that's been a fucking issue in your life it's important to try and and Have a relationship on your terms

And if you if they won't or at least on some kind of middle ground and if your parent won't do that I oh I do think it's I think cutting off a shitty parent is a good way to go and it'll actually ultimately make you happier I've seen that happen for friends of mine you know it's just like it's something that I think should be on the table but that's not your decision that's your wife so all you can do is support her maybe try and get into some therapy and kind of you know be as supportive as possible with that have you ever had that that shift in your life where you had to envision your parents

just as a 20 year old dealing with their parents and going, oh, this is adding way more layers. Totally, totally. To like, oh, this is just my mom and dad, they make the rules, they were like, oh wait, they grew up, they had parents, they were in the same position I was, and they said that that's the perspective

you only get when you have kids of your own But yeah, oh, I'm not gonna have kids so I should try and force that perspective on myself, right? Oh, maybe they're this way because of the the way they were raised It's like you got to take some of that stuff into a totally totally so yeah, that's definitely me but I've also had that and I'm like, oh but Like maybe if you look you know what I can't I should get into this public I mean everybody knows I have a complicated relationship with my dad so it's like I've had that I've had that like moment and I don't get wrong I

definitely have empathy because he went through a lot of shit but then there's other stuff where I'm like oh this he is behaving like like this is not acceptable So I think it cuts both ways where you're like you give them the benefit of doubt and you see what they what they were up Against and you have empathy for them for that But then you also think of ways they behaved certain other times you're like oh, I would never do that Why didn't you see that you didn't like it being done to you? Why do you think it's your job to do it to me? Dude, it literally exactly where my dad you can break a chain. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. He'll still Like talk about ways that other people from 30 years ago wronged him

But he can't admit that like he did the same thing to me or my brothers or whatever Immigrant yeah came over here in the 80s like, you know hard had a weird weird and look his parents were bad I've talked to it on my first special They are from a his parents are in a were from a loveless arranged marriage Yeah, so it's gonna not it's not gonna be the most nurturing environment You didn't have a good example of what he did not have a good example He did not have a good example Stavros Halkeus my namesake was not the best dad He was more of a hoarder and a man who fed exotic birds

He cared way more about his birth and his family and he up like home He was like a weirdly good This is a theme with my with the father figures in my life in my family where it's like They weren't bad guys to like their friends in the community at large No, they just didn't understand how to have families and what they needed to do for that. Well you couldn't like, I think that was just like dudes of a generation, like you just weren't,

you weren't emotional around your kids. You didn't show emotions. And I think part of it is like seeing your kids as almost like your pets. Where they were like they had to do whatever you wanted and there was no like you meeting them halfway emotionally or in any way like more like employees. Yeah employees. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Yeah, something like that I run the house. Oh, you're not part of a house. Oh, no, you run that right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, and then it's like well if that's the case

This this company's been failing under your fucking administration. We've been in debt a lot company's been failing under your fucking administration. We've been in debt a lot. Yeah we should have gone bankrupt a lot of times but so anyway that's a that's a little context to my answer too so you know take it with a grain of salt but here's with another one Bigeldo. Hey Stop, I am a first year teacher in Philadelphia. It's going okay, but the kids are absolutely fucking cooking me. I know you mentioned in the past that you also went to a bullshit school, kind of like the bullshit schools that I teach at. And so I was wondering if you had any advice on maybe how to earn their trust and respect without having to be a total fucking cop teacher, disciplinarian, or how to be firm and caring

without a high and tight bark out of like a gym teacher all the time. All right, love the time. All right Clearly don't have the backbone for that. I don't know what I Can't answer this. Yeah, I mean I can't I went to Baltimore City Public School So I know like this guy I can hear from his voice. He would have been absolute food for us He's like and there was a lot of like well-meaning like white teachers that would like they were making a big difference And by the way, I went to them I went there were two incredible schools in Baltimore where you had to test in that's the system's kind of fucked up in my opinion

as an adult looking at it where it's like Most schools in Baltimore publics the Baltimore City Public School system are horrible. But if you test in Like you can get into there's two magnet schools that here's the kids want to be in school exactly It's like it's like and so there is something weird about that I think because you know If you don't get on a certain track by the time you're in literally fourth grade and start testing well Because you have to get into those schools you have to get into those middle schools when they start testing third grade for that and so it's like if just you a lot of

kids get lost through the cracks in my opinion yeah and if you didn't do well they would literally flunk you out like you could get into that school and if your grades were bad they would just send you back to your zone school so it's like it is a little fucked up but I so I went to like the best schools where the kids were the most well-behaved and we still ate a lot of these fucking schools. I can't imagine being a fucking like like I have people in my family and friends of mine who are actually teaching in Baltimore City right now and there is no as a young like like soft white teacher all I Like and say is like you're just gonna get cooked you just have to sort of like

Develop scar tissue over those burns that you're gonna get and I think all you can do Legitimately is like be who you are like kids sniff out Inauthentic like people who are inauthentic so so fast all you can do is just be who you are You know if you're a fucking jet, you know I I know somebody who's like an art teacher, and she is not she's like a She's an incredibly talented artist, and she was like I just want to give back I want to work in public schools and her first Six months she thought about leaving every day these kids were like brutal They were like they were saying like her kids were like, you know

Literally the little kids were like you're not they're like you're not tough enough to be a teacher here And then they would like punch each other and they're like there's like and there's like race wars between the Hispanic and black kids And it's like she doesn't know she's a nice girl. Who's really a really good artist She didn't know but she's done She's like I would talk to her and it would be like it was brutal and then she just kind of got used to it She she she finds her like the kids that she can relate to and they do listen to her and it's like you just Kind of have to build from there bro prospects. I'm gonna focus on these. Yeah Hey, you know why these three are my favorite cuz the rest of you suck. She was literally talking about this

This is as a future you guys yeah yeah and I have friends who are like oh yeah the development developmentally disabled kids are the best kids in my class because they just sit down and like doodle and especially art too yeah oh there's no there's no parameters just drawing Goku there's like a kid in a class who draws Goku every day and gets bet and like shows progress and doesn't bother anyone and so like yeah dude I really just think and thinking back to who I respected and who my friends didn't like there were dork teachers that we that were just like you know

they were they were like if you asked them questions they were there for you it's like be honestly if you're just fair to these kids if you asked them questions, they were there for you. It's like, be honestly, if you're just fair to these kids and you offer them like, you know, if you're not the kind of guy who is a hard ass, just be fair, you know, and just, they will respect you over time and you will get more used to it over time. And I also think it's important to realize like,

yeah dude, you are actually doing something good. Like, in this country, teachers are so fucked and we should be should get paid way more than you do hey you should get hazard truly truly and like there is some value to that and I think look at these as you're like years of just understanding teachers are the first responders to the humanity of the world yeah here's a new human being that I have to somehow shape into being a functioning member of society and they want no part of it.

None of it, yeah. So, hats off, man. I think make yourself available to form relationships with some of these kids. A lot of, even the, you know, have after school hours or coach class or just find little ways to really bond personally with these kids and understand that you're still going to get cooked. They're still going to call you a bitch and just like, you know, also start rumors about yourself. Like, you know, he killed a guy. Oh, that's good.

Oh, he was. Yeah, he was a sniper. Yeah. Start like all the rumors about yeah, Rogers or something. Yeah, yeah start rumors about oh, yeah We had a teacher a full assassin in a different life and you're like in like his tail is what is like You know his eyes starts left side twitches Michael Craig Just fictionalize your bad story entirely Go that way. Just fictionalize your backstory entirely. That's good. And see, like, pepper that in and see if that happens. Or fuck one of their moms and then bring that up if they ever roast you.

Kind of the power move from the last call. We really are. We really are day-to-day chaining back to these other calls. Maybe that ex-husband was just pulling a power move. Yep, yep. And moving in, so. I like that. Yeah, I mean, we had a teacher that

His first name was Mac and He was just against the coolest old black guy of all time and there was a rumor that he was a pimp Literally because he was a fucking cool old black dude We found his first name was Mac. We were like, oh this guy's awesome. This rumor's true. It's true I think that's your best bet. I mean, this is all wholesome advice. Yeah, start rumors by yourself Backstory, yep, why anything online about you clean get rid of it So there's no you killed the home invader a guy tried I tried you and you guys there's so much I mean kids believe just headlines and not are you could you like you can do something with that? Absolutely. Yeah, that's great

That's good stuff. Guess another one little Eldons You can do something with that. Absolutely. Yeah, that's great. That's good stuff. Give us another one, little Eldons. Hi, Todd, Eldis and Guess. So here's my problem. I've been hooking up very casually with this guy since November. And at first I was down for it to be a totally casual thing because that's where my head Was that and honestly I found him kind of annoying

But pretty quickly unfortunately something switched for me and now I'm totally down bad If you text me I like feel amazing and if not, I feel terrible Honestly, the biggest factor is the dick is so good and I like how he touches him so much. So the problem is he's been very clear he's not looking for a relationship and will likely be out of my city and the country by the summer.

It's boring because I really don't want to deprive myself of top tier dick because of my feelings, but I'm just starting to feel really bad about this because I want more and it's so fleeting. I'm not interested in asking for something that I've already been told is off the table. That's good.

So I guess my question is, is there a way I can compartmentalize my feelings so I can keep hooking up with this guy or do I need to cut this off for my own sanity? I'm also wondering if there's a way I can express these feelings while continuing to keep things casual. I'm not like meet my parents, be my boyfriend,

but I am like I feel crazy and I wanna express how attracted to him I am without making it weird. Thanks, love y'all. Tough. Throat, I mean, blaze of glory. Lay it out on the table knowing that Yeah, that's true.

Worst case scenario, That's a scenario that's a good first part is like you're gonna be out without good dick yeah I mean that's actually a good point you don't have anything to lose yeah like either way this guy this guy is probably out of the picture this is John Cusack 80s movie would come in yeah I mean this is like yeah go stand outside his window with a fucking boombox just blow it up But this is like I mean good for you for trying to rationalize it but it's like even within how how like you know

Deliberate you're being we can feel how horny you are. See, like, it's foaming under the base of this question, under the surface of this question. Like, yeah, and it's so funny how, like, if you're just good at fucking this guy who's annoying, she's like, oh, he's actually, I love him. Human beings are so easy to, like. Well, this is biology at its essence.

It's like, the dick was so good, I wanna be with him for life like this is To this day like the birth of this is creation. Yeah, I mean to this day the fur the girl a girl I can't stop thinking about it's like a girl the first girl who like yeah swallowed my nut I was like the first time that happened to me. I was like, it's this woman is in my heart forever We'll go like the first good pussy you get. Well, get married. We will get married now.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now. And it is so pathetic, but it's like, the people you can't get over are the people that fuck the best. In my experience, maybe I'm just a fucking caveman. I'm sure they're whatever, whatever. Yeah, I think because you're shutting your brain,

you're not thinking about anything because it's so good. And then when your brain's empty, all the the thoughts all the positivity is rushing in. Yeah, this is yeah This is why tribes began is because of good dick Right, you are just followed. Yeah for women followed around the guy with good dick through the savanna. Yeah That's all you're talking about right now. But we also live in a modern world. Break it off, get out there. There's more dick around there. Yeah, so basically, yes.

I think it's one of two ways. The weird, like middle ground you're trying to do, I don't think exists. Like that's, you're just hoping that you can incrementally ratchet things up There's no like can I is there a way to say these feelings without being weird? It's like no not really you have to just be like I think if you want to what Kyle said at first like yeah What do you have to lose you can say hey? Here's how I feel about things

You know I've really enjoyed the time I totally get and to be honest with you. Okay, this will give you a glimmer of hope. That's probably not gonna happen One of a situation that happened with me is I was in a similar situation with a girl and I said the same shit Yeah, and I was like and you know last year I did this a few times where I was like said that you know I was dating I would see girls girls like in New York when I was all back home and you know most the time I had this conversation with them, and then they were like Okay, cool, and then like one or the other of us would fall off there was a girl who had this conversation with early and Over time I started feeling that way she didn't make these feelings known. Or I started being like, hmm,

I kinda like her a little bit, like whatever. She never made those feelings known to me and she was just like, hey, I had a lot of fun but I found a boyfriend. And which, you know, whatever. And then I realized after she said it, like oh fuck, I kinda wish that she had had that. Like, you have nothing to lose from having the conversation.

Because either he's gonna be like, oh, I'm flattered, thank you, but like I said earlier, I can't have anything serious right now. Or he will actually think about that and say, okay, I could maybe see these things. Yeah, some people's, not everybody's timelines match up, even though they might want the same thing,

they might not want it at the same time. Yeah. It's a, you love something, it's a you love something, set it free. And also, ah shit, you were making a good point that I was about to agree with, but that was about it. Yeah, you know, I also think that, yeah, just blow it up. There's no, the phrase that you said,

is there a way that I can compartmentalize my feelings? No, there's never a way. There's no way to compartmentalize. There's never a good idea for any feelings. And I will say statistically, this is always how these situations go. One or the other person develops feelings and that's the expiration date on it.

And you've reached it. And you also might want something because you know it won't work out. That's happened to me too. All you have to do is sit there and idealize it. That's a good point too. That's happened to me as well. You'll never be in it so you can be like,

well this will be perfect because it's not gonna happen so you just can daydream about it. That's a good point too. That's happened to me as well You'll never be in it so you can be like well, this will be perfect because it's not gonna happen So you just can daydream about it, right? Right, right being perfect and how you'll never what if we go to the farmers market? And then I get good dick Instead of just only getting it at 1 a.m. Yeah. So yeah, those are your options, baby girl You either got to just move on and just whatever or there is nothing There's you don't have anything to lose with giving it, just opening up, sharing your feelings. And if anything, it'll work one way or the other because either he will be kinda down

or he'll be like, ugh, this bitch caught feelings, I gotta go, and he might cut it off for you. But she sounds smart enough to know. Definitely, yeah. She knows the answer to her own question. I think a little bit just wants to hear somebody else I think so I think so But yeah, either way if you make that last stand and he doesn't go for it The the only the only downside is that guy now knows like oh this bitch has sprung I can just treat her however I want so when you make that if you decide to share your feelings You either start you either ratchet up how serious it is or you just get out of there immediately

And because he will that if he's a bad guy, which you might be too Digmatized to tell he'll just try and take advantage. He'll just you just know Oh, I have this I have this bitch in the back of my pocket forever Yeah, if you if you blow it up, he says no long con as if he comes back in a little while Forever if you if you blow it up he says no long Conn as if he comes back in a little while Don't yeah, don't engage after that but give it cool and listen cool if it's just over Hey, you had a nice run with some good dick. It's a night I still like I said I still think about the girls that gave who had some of the best pussy of all time and and I think of them

Fondly you'll care. I'll be on a bike ride. The Sun is hitting me just right now. Just be like chapters in our lives man Those were awesome titties When that metal piercing hit my molar That was awesome. All right, let's go. Let's get one to go out on a nice one here all this and we should say again Watch the special guys dirt nap out working working the people find it Kyle 800 pound gorilla media free on YouTube in a month or whenever this comes out beginning probably April probably then yeah it's free it's recently free on read to free with commercials the way I want it no

concern for punchlines and Ed for just an ad for better health. Just wedged into the best part, that's what I want. Hit us with a nice one to go out on Big LD. Hi, Stuv, I'm a long time listener, love the special. Thank you, thank you. Hello, Elvis, hello guests. I'm so happy that you're listening to this. So anyway, to get right to it I have lost about 70 pounds in the last like two years like we're talking like 220 down to like 150

And that that takes a toll on The woman's the woman the womanly figure you could say in that I have saggy boobs at 29 And I am sucking and fucking my way through St. Louis and every time I'm just like, is this man judging me for my saggy titties or do men truly not care? Like, should I be confident in myself despite, you know, my boobs hanging low? This is, yeah, I'm dead serious. This is really like folks at my stuff like Just any reassurance or anything you can you can offer to help me feel better. Thanks. Love you guys. Bye um Okay, so you're basically like well first of all you should be proud of you know

Yeah, worked hard for something and you're sucking and fucking and it's helped your it's even if it hasn't been I bet you could have been sucking and fucking through st. Louis even at 220 But now you might believe in yourself a little more like you've you've so you should be proud of that And you know you if your titties are hanging low I just think like if if you haven't sounds like you're doing good with your sex life, right and like Do men truly care do they not care? I mean, it's a case-by-case basis, right? Like some people yeah, you know I'll take titties in all shapes and sizes for sure You could also I don't know fucking wear a bra or so. I don't know

I got to know what the like what it ultimately comes down to what makes you feel better So I don't know like I don't know what to like what it ultimately comes down to what makes you feel better Well, do some men care sure some might do others not care. They won't care either You know, so it's just like it is a case-by-case thing Yeah I would say you did that work on yourself to lose that weight then don't negate that by now feeling bad about writing you And you put a lot of work in if there's somebody that's gonna be ungrateful for the fact that any type of you know Consensual intimacy Yeah, yeah, put them instantly and let them know they can get bent and also yeah st. Louis

I'm not trying to sure generalize a place to have some saggers, but I think you Saggers, but I think you're crushing it These slobs in st. Louis should be appreciative apps and also like you might be overdo it Here's the thing send us a picture your tits There's no way we can really give you but that is that's I mean, I'm joking obviously but But you also this also might be in your head. They might be a little saggy or whatever But it's like that's also natural right some people have like some people have saggy titty some people have dense titties They hang tight they hang low whatever they they come in all shapes and sizes thousand percent. I can't emphasize enough a

Confident person is Sexier than a person person with no confidence. That's true. Every single time. Most of the time. Let's not get crazy. Most of the time. There is a certain point where you hit that nexus. I want to paint with a white brush for the sake of feeling good. Listen, that's my whole thing is confident guy that looks like shit. But even I have to say this lifestyle has some limitations.

But still, yeah, it's like some part of me does wonder, are you being too harsh on yourself about your titties? Like, and either way, it sounds like you said it's fucking up your sex life, but I don't see how. But also if you're just, I mean, are you trying to get something else from all this sucking and fucking right? Well, if you're like if you're being unfulfilled and you're just sucking and fucking maybe we gotta look at yeah All the SNF has happened. Yeah, and then so what are you trying to get done? Are you are you looking to be in a relationship? Cuz like I can tell you you'll find someone who you know, that's not an issue there Like what are you trying to get done? Is it just your personal body image stuff?

Did you lose the weight and you're like, oh, this didn't help, it's still inside. Like, now there's something else. Cause I'll tell you this much, if it ain't your titties, it's gonna be something else. It's gonna be something else. Constantly there will be new insecurities to find. And then the flip side is also like, hey look,

if there is something that physically you wanna do to make yourself feel better, you did it with the weight loss, right? You worked hard, you lost 70 pounds. If you wanna like, you know, get a nice piece of lingerie that keeps your titties lifted up for a special occasion, treat yourself to some of that. If you wanna, sometime in the future,

get your titties done. You know what I mean? I think there's far less judgment on any kind of like cosmetic surgery. For sure for sure. Life is so short to not get the stuff you want within means. 100% and look if you want to do that great but I think. But don't feel the need to. You don't need yeah this is we're not saying like yeah get them fucking tuned up you won't have no problems whatsoever get them bigger even while you're while you're look while we're the doctor slice

The open you might as well get huge tits real rubbery ones But yeah koi fish eyes, so maybe this isn't So maybe that's not the reassurance you want but I think isn't so maybe that's not the reassurance you want but I think it's within you the answer unfortunately is within you right yeah yeah of course you can find how you look now whatever it is you can find whatever your goal is you can get that done if you believe in yourself right I really I think that truly I don't know you know you might be too harsh on your on the sag but there

is some you know there's clearly people out there that are that are down regardless And it's a matter of like what are your goals. I think you can accomplish them as is as you are But if you want it if you want to do other shit to like keep the keep the you know the the Personal the confidence shit boosting, that's possible too. But anyway. And maybe, I'd like to ask you,

are you just making up for like a time that maybe you were bigger and you weren't getting laid, so you're not just packing it all in, like the guy that got married at 19 is now divorced. And like maybe it'll slow down eventually, or are you like, is it like a sex and love addiction thing? Like that might turn into something else. Sure.

If you're just out there trying to get dick, who cares what they think? I also am wondering like, what is the like true motivation here, right? Like, cause you're asking do men care, but it's like, why does that really matter? You know what I mean? It's like- If you're using a sentence like,

I am sucking and fucking my way through St. Louis, which seems like a Johnny cash throw away well I fucked a man in Reno he fucked me in the ass I sucked a man's hard penis get me through that just to watch him come anyway, good luck buddy. I'm sure the titties are great. And you know, keep at whatever, if you wanna keep losing weight, you wanna keep doing self improvement,

you wanna, you're fine as is, but if you wanna tune some shit up, you're fine to do that too. Hopefully we answered your question and there's not, we didn't make a new insecurity for you. No, no, no. I think you should be proud of what you got done and then work in progress. Yeah. All right. Well, look, thanks for thank you for calling in.

Good luck out there in St. Louis. Thanks, everybody, for calling in. Kyle, thanks for being a guest man. Super fun. Watch the special folks. Thanks. Subscribe to our YouTube if you're not on the YouTube. Subscribe to, you know, audio if you're not subscribed to audio. Give us a five-star review and we will be back next time, folks. Bye-bye.