Stone Clearing With Richard Herring - Chapter 151

Episode Date: October 12, 2023

Chapter 151 - Welly Boot Jeopardy. It's before 5pm on the 12th October 2023 and Rich is hoping Duckett's Passage is open for business cos he has some stones to clear. It's a super eventful clear with football managers of undetermined gender and sex-swapped sex-criminals and birds composing symphonies on the telephone lines. Plus will Rich come a cropper as he tries to empty his welly? And how many rules will he break and how sexy will you find it? For those of you who thought the format was stale, liften to the fucking ftones, my friend.

Stone clearing with Richard Herring Hello my fine friends, it's 16.53 on the 12th of October, October it's my 56th and quarter today. It's a pretty good reason for celebration. Welcome to chapter 151. Heartlink towards those hard chapters that have come. 200 onwards will be obviously for experts alone experts only I'm up in a video this week but the stone curing she must be done and weather today well it's a little bit grey, it's been raining, it's not raining now. We're heading up towards Duckett's Pax Edge, which is thankfully reopened the mystery of why it closed. Perhaps they have destroyed the magic.

Perhaps they've discovered that for an end of the park, then, but I think that they already had. What can you do? We go. It's a shame to be here, of course. I think it's just a common cold. Rather than Covid or something worse, of course, could be lingering deep inside me. A total sack of wolfies doing the wee. We'll fill it up. A bit of wolfies not bothered. Not paying any attention. So we're... Oh!

Yeah, you know, back to the old grindstone. The stone grind, back to the old grindstone. The stone grind, back to the old stone grind. Now maybe some examples up here, looks like the pilaf has been repaired or something. Quite sure what. There are some stones here. I mean, they're technically almost off the field. I mean, they are off the field, but I'm going to put them in. I'm going to give them as offerings the Alpha and Omega Gods and hope that doesn't offend them. The crop, the Raype crop is looking good.

We'll see you in a cat. The cat is high-telligant out of here. I'm not surprised. I'm not going to let Walfe off the lead. Two nice mediums there to start with, slightly cheating mediums. Gerrano rules the stone, period. That's actually the first roll. Walfe stone, period. I don't know if I've covered that. Second roll is you must only clear stones from the field. I'm not going to move them onto the field.

You also have to take them off the field, of course. That's rule three. You must remain on the field, on the periphery of the field, but you must not be removed from the field from went. They come off. So yeah, the second crop of the year is going well. It's sort of grass and what I thought was peas, what the farmer claims is rape seed. Some kind of wolfie talking on the, what we get, kind of a cat. I think it's going to let it happen. I'm going to clear some stones. That's what we hear for wolfie. We're not here for chasing cats. You can do that on your own time my friend.

I'm paying you in love and food. Is it because you get got away? She's not going to stay around but you, you're looniesy. Look at that looks like an arrowhead there from the near-lithic tribesman off it goes. Oh, the eolithic tribesmen off it goes. Spear point maybe. The friendly eolithic tribesmen, oh woman, that's not be sexist. And the darts go well. So I have been feeling ill this week. That's not the idea with the food, because it doesn't stop you dying, but I have generally

had very good energy. I had tofu and chickpea curry for lunch that I made myself. It was some spring greens. Yeah, that's what we've become. But remember, you must look after yourself because you're no good to the stones if you're the eby dead. You are not, not organic material that shall perish if you die, but if you live, you may help you stones.

Goat. So if I used to say I've got quite a farty anus as a result of this new diet and that one rip a little bit earlier, I think you might have noticed it's hard for me to tell because I've got headphones on, but certainly anything alive within a five meters of me at that point would have been killed. And that's not about them because stones are impervious to farts, but the stone staszy can be taken down by a well-directed gulf. And so that do have that chemical weapon. Ready, it's not just the health benefits.

You know, even if it just stops them for a second, they go, ah, that gives you a chance to clear a stone and high-tail it out of here like a black cat escaping a crazy dark. Oh, I like that. It's a bit tired, but still a little bit ill. Off the LEMShips really, I did have one LEMS at today, but more just out of that drug habit than now and the knees for it Honey and ginger don't you tried that particular kind. They're not sponsored in the pub cusp But maybe they will do once they hear this The in-limesip is listening

Get in touch we can discuss terms Slightly lost uh lost you there, but luckily I think just checking to see if it was running was what made it stop so we didn't miss any gold as well I could say there's something here some archaeological thing like a broken plate he's made a plastic let's go off the field. Looked like fine china, but I think it was un-fine and unrefined plastic. It's office not organic. It's not really within my remit,

but of course the stone clearer as of old did not have to cope with the influx of plastic that is choking up on it. It's a death. They would have marveled at it if they'd seen it. They'd seen a plastic plate. They'd have on, oh my goodness me, what is this wonder? Not knowing. What effects it could have once it got into the bloodstreams of actually living creatures. Get off the line with them. Anyway, we're crossing into the corner of the field. I'm looking for a nice stone to throw on the

Ken in the corner field, but we've got heavy thick grass here and this is usually quite a fackin' area. Oh, there's a little egg-colored and almost egg-shaped, flattened egg-shaped shell. That's going... yeah, that landed. That was a nice throw there for me, though I do say it myself. Yeah, that landed. That was a nice throw there for me. Though I do say it myself. I'm the only one here. I have to say it myself. And there's another one going into the roots. The trees are all doing quite well. But it's off the field. Oh, now we go.

The Higledy Pigledy, Wigledy Migledy. War, Kalang. We've been here many times. Some people said I can't imagine you can go around here 151 times and come up with anything entertaining and instructive. What about all the times I did it during lockdown that didn't even go out as podcasts. It just disappeared into the ether unless someone pledged praying record record at home, might be up in someone's attic like lost episodes, Dad's army. There's Stoves-Vazie, you can't tell if it's a man or woman, a very purple hat and blue coat with a small white dog. It took like they might play for West Ham United. They manage you West Ham United.

Looking very infield. Of course, it's not for me to describe gender to Stone Starzy. If they've stopped in the middle of the field, making them I get root across that way a little bit tricky. I might do the, just checking I've got time for the longer walk. Stopped again, looking at. I think it's a wuggenle form. I don't know if I may go out, I said a manle form. This is the problem with middle-aged, and it's a problem I've encountered myself. I off to mistaken for a middle-aged woman. Do my height of thinking my lustrous locks will be seen the dog there we're going. Sometimes it can work the other way. There's a big

fun guy here. Come on, Wolfie, you can join the dots for that one. You can join the dots. Come on, Warpher, you can join the dots for that one. You can join the dots. Come on, there's a good joke in there. There was a big sort of tote stall. When do the frogs get a stool? That's my question. Why is it all the tote? We're doing that a little bit of stand-up here wasp. Put this in right. Just looking over the next field, is that a massive stone in the next field? This next field has been freshly clout. I don't think it was a stone if it was it was huge. Still looking at the phone, the old West Ham manager. Could be asked to know, Bern Lee maybe. And they've sent me the long way, so this could be a trap, this could be a tactic.

Ow, I have come out just in my Wellington, it's with no socks on. Not anticipating a super long walk. There are a few little pebbles in the bottom of this valley. I'm going to take the risk of, of course, you'll know that if you ever worn wellies without socks, the risk is you take off the wellie, get the stones out but actually your foot goes on to the floor. Oh it's so close. I'm going to just keep my balance. Your foot goes on to the floor. This is, I wish there was a video of this. It's amazing. I think I'm actually picking up quite a lot of, oh no. Oh fuck you know now I haven't picked up my foot hasn't gone on the floor yet but

some straw fuck whoa whoa whoa this is amazing what's happening here I wish I could describe it to you I still haven't touched the ground don't know if I've got the stones out. Oh, this is this is how I die wolves. I did it. Fucking hell. That was one of the most exciting high-octane things that happened to me in a long time. Trying, you know what I was trying to do trying to get the stones out of the boot with having no socks on. Well, I'm not putting my foot on the ground. We could hear that breath because that was quite alright. Kicking the cup of stones, don't wait the stones are coming off, kicking the cup out to touch.

From the path, oh, still getting over that. I wobbled, did you hear me? I wobbled and I wiggled. But my little house did not fall down my friends and my boot, now clear, I wonder how to clear the other one as well, pretty much clear of little stones and didn't get any dirt on my foot. What happened, and I made it clear, was during that exercise, this boot fell over and a bit of straw got into the boot which was kind of worse than what was in there already. I mean people said there wouldn't be enough incident in this to keep people excited and interested.

But every time we do this something happens doesn't it? Something amazing, something unpredictable, something, you know, could be ITV prime time drama, as I was saying. Just looking for a stone for the single reneantry, which weirdly again just looks grand as thick with, this is slim pickings, for the, this isn't going to make the elves come out, but we've got two, one of them lost it, how far can, how fucking hell there it is. See, who said there's no incident, I've nearly fallen over three times, I picked up a tiny pebble, dropped it as I've on the backward pull. It's important to concentrate all times, don't clear it again. It's not, it's not as easy as luck, people say rich, I don't need 200 episodes about how to clear the stones, another caramel, nice caramel, nice small but nice size still. It's simply, I can't be, I'll just get out there and clear the stones myself of my

pork balls. Oh, my poor fools, I like to see you try. Go ahead, it's too late for you guys. You've already listened to 150 episodes of this. But to the newbies who shouldn't be listening, I'd say, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, just go ahead and I'm thrilled.

And what, you're just gonna clear some stones. Okay. Yeah, no. No, I wanna see that. I'm gonna tell me when you're going down because I wanna tag along to watch What I'm saying is it not as easy as I make it look It's all on time

Just let me check in my Yeah, it's still still going checking my... yeah it's still going. That's good news. So I'm actually hassling a little bit here, I found a little channel without any plants in it and just stopping to pick up the occasional nugget, a little stone nugget. I bought my boots a bit wet. Now I don't have that happened. I don't know if they're looking at it. I've heard so many of these books. I think the dog invites the boots and breaks them. I had so many boots that have become no longer water before I want to. Now the stone stars the head. This could be the trap.

My goodness. The old heart's racing, I bet yours is two. With all this going on here, my goodness. You know, the good news is, oh, there, I actually have to say that, I haven't felt it yet. I'm going to say there isn't any stonestowns, it's just there under these loads of vegetation, so you can't see any of the sand there. Good medium there, just kicked it out, picked it up through it. Oh you could just do that without any training. You could kick it, see it, kick it, kick it through, flick it, goodie?

No, well I'm saying you can't, there's a very clean, just a bit of a cycle, almost like a bit of skull, that's the sort of size and shape of it. Not a full skull, just a bit of skulls been napped off, maybe in a stone age, the bottom of me of some kind. That's the thickness I'm talking about and there's a little curve on it, you know, that's what. And, you know, if you think you could describe the stones

in the way that I can and explain their size, as clearly as I can to an audio listener, sure, go ahead. Why not do you own Stone Clean Procrast as well? I'd love to see that. I don't know what I've listened to. I'd love to listen to that Brian Bramble. Yeah. I haven't thought about him for a while.

He thinks about me all the time. Something I know. So it's longer than I think. I've got to make sure I get home by 20 minutes to get home. Well, shouldn't we do it? That's a very important childcare issue to navigate. So I don't know if I can time for a stone pole though, like last stone pole. Do you want to do another solo? Oh, there's some other shit there, how big punishment.

Yeah. It's like several animals all defecated diarrhea in the same spot. Some kind of sick diarrhea all intable and intestinal game. Next feel a long, beautifully cloud. Oh, if I had the time and the will. Oh no, I see big stonest line. Why is my fucking feel covered in vegetation? And the next feel just looks like the landscape of the moon.

Do I have time for you to to look at what could be? Good girl, you can be a form. Let's just, we're just going to look at the next one. Remember, you was never going to another man's field. Or women, if it's a woman doing the stuff down to the air, which is the air, it never is. You certainly must never clear from there, but look at that stuff. Just lying there, as if,

the whole thing's a dog coming up, falling into the trap, and just gonna quick me, pick it up, I'm running through it. Come on. You might have seen me, right there. I think it's the same person who went that way, is it?

Oh, they're good today. I think they just knit through the fence so that they could double back on me. A fucker's bike. Clearly, the ripped, that's the biggest stone I've cleared for a while. Admittedly, not from my field of fields. Breckle every rule in the roll, rule book there. But it went on the wall between that two fields so I feel morally justified. Yeah, fucking little cat. Cheeky, cheeky, stone, stasifucker. They'll be reporting back what he's seen and hopefully won't be able to describe me. I moved like lightning.

I can get over the horizon here before we find this way back onto the steel. I mean I'm already reporting to the Stoosazi and to the Stuncleron Federation. Either we'll be after my guts for guarders as they heard about this. Luckily it's a secret. What am I doing here? It's a script that never do it all. Just kicked up. A lovely orangey. This is another caramelized stone. That guy's there in the corner of the field. his eyes are penetrating into my back, I can feel them. Maybe he's always disappeared, but maybe he saw me pick up that stone. It's only the second stone I picked up in his size, that he's seen both of them. He's going to put two and two together.

He's got to work out what's going on here. gotta work out what's going on here well yeah maybe it's got a little bit calm and a little bit easy for me recently uh but today the boots and the stone stasie the break in the rules what we can agree there's life in the old stone turn franchise yet my fan friends still got this lovely it's a beautiful I mean this is from earth what what what earth the rock would be orange that's not something you ever see another stone's rising in that other corner of the field a lot of birds sitting on the telegraph wire like buzz B from the old habits, the BT or whatever it was, yellow pages or whatever.

It's good to talk. Did he say that? Weird. Weird how they all sit in their matra get a photo of that. It's rather a beautiful set. What are they waiting for? They look like notes on some crazy minimalist classic more birds fly out there. Wow. Even more than that, it looks like a crazy piece of music created by nature. I want to play it.

There's only three strings there. So there should be five on a stage. So it's hard to know which is FACE in it. Yeah, but doesn't it? I don't know if it's treble or bass clef. Oh no, they've taken down all my... what the hell? They've taken down all the bushes and stuff in the can in the middle of the field. It's been a while since I've been here. Oh, I mean it's sort of a disaster but it's sort of amazing as well because we could see the incredible can. They've taken up the whole... Oh my god it's all happening today in it! This is just... I can give you an example of this, the music of nature. I mean try playing this as a musical piece. I'll take a picture of this but wow. Seriously this is extraordinary. Someone's put a painted stone on top of here as well.

Oh, to see it all, I mean, it looks pathetic. I thought it was quite a good can, but like it's all just in one place, because that's where the tree was, and then now there's a big gap where the tree was, and there's almost more stones underneath where the tree was. Fuckin' hell, I mean, this, I don't know if I'm gonna make it home, it's so, I'm overwhelmed by what I'm observant, I just was sitting in the house all day feeling a bit ill and I come out, I see musical birds creating symphonies, I see leaves of green, I see a can that's now been exposed to the elements after living so long under a tree.

I mean someone just wanted to see the Ken, I hope you can blame them. I've seen another stone stasie guy, oh and that right on into that point here, well played. The stone stasie have really left me alone for a long time. Today they are fucking me up good and proper. I don't know if it's even worth collecting five stones for the stone pole because by the time I get to the stone pole, the band with a small white dog, he's not all managed to do this guy. He has just had to spit out some flam there, I apologise, so I've got one stone right in my hand. I mean, I could

do it all, but he's tying his brunette door to the ring and he will, A, make me like, so clever, they know I've got to be home by half-bust to be with the kids. So clever. So clever will be. Now I can't wait for ages. He's going just so slowly like a dodgy old timer. Even if I don't hit him, he'll be within earshot of the stone, the kinking, clanking, clacking like a duck duck, the stone potel. I've got two stones and walking as slowly as I can, just trying to be as old as I can, full this guy and thinking I'm an old timer, just staring at my leg, I'm just putting a bit of a limp on it. Make out my legs are gnawed and bent. Of course they're not their fit as a fiddle, but I've only got two stones, if I manage to get a stone pot, this is a young guy, again wearing a cap, the classic garb, the Stan Stasizy. It's more like dog, it's putting him on a lead.

He's aware that trouble could erupt at any second. It's that stone or a mushroom. It's that one that's going to pick up two stones there. Now you're not spotted. You can do it very expertly. Always coming across. Shit. It's coming up to the right point. Right, well if you're coming and stay with me, good go. All right, come on, stay here, good go, stay here, stay here, stay here, good go, good go, stay with me, come on, good I'm going to go. I'm going to try to get it to a stick.

I was trying to keep the dog away from the other dog. I picked up a stone, I've got five stones. He's right behind me. He's heading in the other direction. No one would have predicted he to have come up that pathway and there I I dare number one oh miss I mean it was that hit it was too low I don't think so three misses four misses one hit one out of five again but I was under a lot of pressure that man just needed a term round the whole game was up. Wow! Wow! This is what happens if you do the full, I mean this

isn't either full circuits, it's still the half circuit, it's been a while since I've been all the way around with you guys. But some things are foot isn't it? And it's not just my foot, my damp foot. That's a foot, but there's something out on so is the other foot. That's also a foot, but this, some things going on today. The kids are home. The doorbell has just told me. That's the kind of guy I am, I have a speaking doorbell. Imagine if you listen this in the 19th century. What would they make of it? I mean first I go,

where's these, what's going on? Where's the man's voice coming from? I think I can understand that. Anymore, I suppose, that you and I would understand what the people of 2222 will be doing. And I'm clearly understand that's what I'm doing. I think I've all come to understand that. Whatever era they're from. That's the language that unites us if the medium does change the language of the stone, the fame. Coming up to the main kerner, I feel like I should... Oh, there's another fucking stone stas. What the fuck? It's Jimmy Savile I think.

It kind of looks exactly like Jimmy Savile. White hair, Labrador, like Jimmy Savile, sort of shells who might be a woman. Come on, boss. I think it's a woman, it's a female or Jimmy Savile. You can imagine such a thing with a Labrador. And just managed to knit through in time. Hopefully they will come up behind us.

Could be Steve Cougar of course preparing for his role the female Jimmy Savler. You know they've got to do sequels, they've got to do sequels however in appropriate that might seem. So I'm just going to walk down here pretending I'm a normal guy. I can't let on, but I am on the lookout for a stone to stop Brexit. I'm on the lookout for stones for the alphabet, because of course worried that I may have offended them by bringing on the admittedly lovely big stones that stones that were from the field. Oh I've broken some rules today and boy it feels sexy, it feels good you know you love it, you know you want it, you want it, it was you who made me do it, I didn't want to do it. It was you and you won it.

So, coming up to the Digestock Brexit. And a fan of stone for the Digestock Brexit. It's a nice one. It's a bit of flint. stone for the dish to stop Brexit. It's nice once, a bit of flint, but it's got that black inside and the calcified, I guess, exterior. It looks a bit like a mushroom, looks a bit like Donald Trump's penis into the ditch, it goes, stopping Brexit, stopping all the terrible things in the world. Thanks to me, you just don't need to thank me. The world's safe, thanks to little rich hearing, but he doesn't need any thanks for that. What are he's doing? I've picked up three stones, ones are which is so engordic, but I'm not going to take off the field. I feel I've pushed my luck enough today.

Wolfie is looking for the black cat again, but that cat is long gone. Like my career. So, coming up to the Alfredo, we can live into this Don'ts, Black friends, Father, you foul thingy, a merry dance. Don't live into the birds, I'll be. Don't live into your underpounds, this little tribute to lockdowns I'm done with throughout. Living to leaf stones, listening to leaf stones and they interned

Charlie Femme, to ye my friend, my friend. I'm heading now to Duckett's Passage, the newly revamped duck its passage, lovely new garage, in the back garden of that house, tying some lovely stones a bit of brick, can't resist kicking the stone to the side, a bit of bottle there, a bit of a broken bottle, vandals, a vandals of the village are out, broken bottles, vandals, the vandals, the villager out, broken bottles. It's time to get your emails. Got an email. Here, I'll just come in from... It's from Pinkflower. Pinkflower, this is from Pinkflower. Pink, I guess, probably not going to sing it.

Flowers, this, the certainly. FLO, you are flower, you make a cake, a gay wedding from, I guess, a pig-mouture and beliefs. Sorry, Pinkflower. I guess, applicable to your unbeliefs. Sorry, Pinkflower. I'm sorry, actually, to everyone for that. That's offensive to Pinkflower, and it's their name,

and it's also offensive to Christians and gay people. So I mean, I've united you all. Fundamentals, Christians, and gay people all united together at last. What's your question,flar? Hi, my name's Pinkflar. Please don't make jokes about my name. Just, I was named after the Foxinger Pink, when it's her name is Frower. FLO, I thought you are my parents.

See, they didn't think of the other meaning when they named me. But to be honest, would even Pinkflar, I think, would make jokes about that even when the flower is the plant. So please be respectful to me and the gay community in the Fundamentals Christian, Christian and Christian community and also the community of flowers, especially the pink ones. My question Richard is, we're coming up to wintertime, though the weather is unusually clean. Does that affect your clams? In the long term plants for stone clearing.

Look, I just deal that I just clear the stones and dumps. That's what I do. I don't think about the weather particularly. I don't think about weather. I should don't think about weather as you clear the monor I just clear them and doesn't move the ground hard it won't give up its prey it doesn't matter because the ground soft doesn't matter if the stones just line the top of the ground cover cover it in snow, I will clear them for I'm the one true lord. I'll tell you what they're all supposed to put some socks on for that long walk because rubbed my ankle up a store. Look, I'm going to wash my hands, it's an important part of your job. Watch your been on the field. Again, we don't want to die.

So, if you're going to eat this and dirty thing about that, please wash your hands thoroughly, think happy birthday twice while you're doing it, as you're sure I'm sure you heard me doing that. Take off your coat when you get in, or you won't feel the benefit when you go out, feed the dog, and look, I'm going to see you guys, A and on, and back in time, I'm going to just back in time, and I'll see you soon. the bird's hand-treef, don't live them to your underpants. And I'll live for you, my friend, my fine friend. For down clearing with Richard Herring, starred me, Richard Herring and Warfew the Dog,

plus the West Ham Burnley, Aston Villa manager, the female Jimmy Savile, of course, some other Stone Starzy people, and that wonderfulile of course, some other Stone Stasi people and that wonderful orchestra of birds, the music is by Mike Offgrave, the voice and truth, don't live unto your underhand. the stone and they intern for a living to hear my friend, my friend. you