Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 369 - Eddie Della Siepe

Episode Date: April 13, 2015

Comedian Eddie Della Siepe joins us to talk straws, YouTube ads, and doomed comedy shows....

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hi, he's Dave Shumka. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 369 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who's, I basically recovered from a cold last week and is feeling mighty fine, Mr. Dave Shumka. Yeah, there was some times there I didn't think I'd make it. Yeah, was it your times there I didn't think I'd make it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:00:46 Was it your faith that pulled you through? It was my faith in... Probiotics. Yeah. My faith in yogurt. Oh, yeah, that's right. Antibiotics. No.
Starting point is 00:00:59 Yogurt's probiotic. No, I know. But in my head, I was like, what's the thing that oh no i didn't feel better i didn't take anything i mean i took things nothing works no the only things that work are the things that just knock me out and let me go have a sleep yeah the the uh coughing colding sneezing runny nose so you can get some rest medicine nyquil is that the one bingo yeah and our guest today uh great now i going to forget the name of his podcast. You son of a gun.
Starting point is 00:01:30 Barely Friending is the name of his podcast. He has an album coming out on iTunes. And a very funny comedian indeed, Mr. Eddie Della Seppi is our guest. Hey, guys. Thanks for having me. Thanks for coming. Thanks for being on the show. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:44 Love the show. It's a great show. Should we get to know us? Yeah. Get to know us. So you're up here for a couple of weeks. A couple of weeks, yeah. Hanging out.
Starting point is 00:01:56 Hanging out. You're living in LA now. Yeah, yeah. I moved there January 2014. Okay. Yeah. And? Did you talk to my mom before this is that what she does she just opens just opens with a hand and uh wow wow me eddie wow wow me in this friendly casual podcast
Starting point is 00:02:21 it's been fun yeah it's been interesting um doing comedy up in canada for like so long and then kind of starting over with a skill set it's kind of right you know what i mean like it's like do people see you and then go oh hey you're good at that they're like uh they assume you're bad because everyone's talks a big game there i assume and then they say oh you do have jokes and after 13 years i mean I assume. And then they say, oh, you do have jokes. And after 13 years, I mean, you hone something. And then they're very surprised. Because they only have seven minutes increments to actually work on their act. Whereas we grow and we have exponentially more time.
Starting point is 00:02:53 That 10,000 hour rule kind of applies more. What's this rule? I don't know this rule. No. Malcolm Gladwell. Canadian author. Oh, you guys both know this rule. Get out of here.
Starting point is 00:03:03 I'm going to go. 10,000 hours. It's track one on... Rent. What's his name? That white rapper? Macklemore? Is it really?
Starting point is 00:03:13 Yeah, it is. Are you quoting Macklemore and Knock on Glass? Oh, wow. They're sort of the two big guys in my religion. Big guys? Hey, come here, big guy. I give them noogies. Yeah, no, it's like
Starting point is 00:03:31 you have to get to do 10,000 hours of something to be good at it. Okay. He basically explains that he talks about Bill Gates in the book, too, Outliers, about how everyone assumes he's just super smart and that's why he is who he is.
Starting point is 00:03:49 Right. But in fact, the reason why is because he went to this affluent school on the West Coast and they were the only school in all of America that had a computer. And no one else wanted to use it. And the computer, they couldn't afford to keep the computer, but there was a company that the principal knew that needed people to help program his computer. And they thought, well, we have these kids that like were using computers. So we had to have like a co-op program. Yeah. Ah.
Starting point is 00:04:16 So we had access to something when no one else had access. So we went to Harvard or Yale or whatever school it was. He had all this programming experience right when the personal computer came out. But like, what is 10,000 hours? What is that roughly? Well, because he had, oh, what is that roughly in terms of days?
Starting point is 00:04:30 Yeah, like days or years. It'd be funny if this podcast was just explaining a book for two hours. A book, by the way, that I have not read. But I know the examples. It's like the Beatles.
Starting point is 00:04:40 When they were young, they all went to Hamburg and they played every night at multiple clubs all night long. And then Wayne Gretzky, his dad built him a rink in the backyard so he could play nonstop. But what if you do something for 10,000 hours and you still stink? You come out the other end and then like... You don't get mentioned in the book, that's for sure.
Starting point is 00:04:59 Then there's this guy. Or Ralph. Yeah, this guy. Rodney. Tried all these things. 10,000 hours is 416 days and 16 hours. So, yeah, like you could really. Could really hurt a guy.
Starting point is 00:05:15 So imagine doing 416 days of comedy, like all those hours in your whole career. You got to eventually be good at it. But do you though? Some guys are just still doing the same 10 minutes. That's true. But you're really good at good at it. But do you, though? Some guys are still doing the same 10 minutes. That's true. You're really good at those 10 minutes. No one does those 10 minutes like anybody. I saw Malcolm Gladwell in a cafe in Toronto.
Starting point is 00:05:35 I saw his 10 minutes. It's garbage. He just talks about how much money he's got. Don't I look like if Sideshow Bob had a baby? He does look like Sideshow Mom. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:48 He's like half Jamaican, half Welsh or something. Okay. But I saw him. Malcolm Gladwell. It does sound like a really like regal name. Yeah. Yeah. For a Jamaican person.
Starting point is 00:06:01 What was he doing in the cafe? Did you observe him? He was reading his own book. Holding it like. Yeah, I hope someone notices me. What's that? Yes, this is me. But I thought it'd be.
Starting point is 00:06:15 How many hours have you been making coffee for? Dumped it out. I thought it'd be funny to go up to him and just be like, I finalized it by doing it, but I couldn't do it. They're like, hey man, huge, huge fan. He goes, oh, thank you. You know,
Starting point is 00:06:28 like I'm a big fan of the book. I love the book. Big Da Vinci Code fan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And just like, I don't know. Yeah, that's me. Just close with it.
Starting point is 00:06:39 Yeah, if somebody thought I was the author of a thing, like you're very welcome. Let me sign your book. But yeah, so have you been doing comedy for 10,000 hours, do you think? I don't think so. I've did 13 years. But like, does it count the time you spent writing, time you spend practicing?
Starting point is 00:06:58 What about time you just spent fantasizing about? Or just like dropping a line in like a party? Yeah. Like working bits into bits of conversation. You're like, a line in like a party. Yeah. Oh, like working bits into bit of conversation. You're like that. I'm deducting it. Like taxes. It's like loaded,
Starting point is 00:07:12 like a panel talk. Yeah. Like this lunch was technically part of one of my hours. I'm kind of working towards my 10,000 hours. But, uh, I spent 10,000 hours eating for sure. Yeah. I'm not that working towards my 10,000 hours. But I spent 10,000 hours eating, for sure. I'm not that good at it.
Starting point is 00:07:29 I still bite my tongue here and there. Yeah. Yeah. I still bite my lip. But you never, like, way overjudge. You know, it's like the distance. Stab your eye with a fork. Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:07:41 Like, the food's not flying over your shoulder. But I guess it isn't when you're a baby. Like, it pretty fast yeah how many hours of eating do you need that'd be a funny thing if somebody just saw somebody at a dinner table just stab their eye but and just say he just says i'm new yeah continue yeah or he's only like 9900 hours there was uh i was uh for some other uh thing i was researching the history of the fork. And this, the first time that the fork like made an appearance in Europe was this woman showed up with a fork at a very fancy dinner. Like everybody had knives,
Starting point is 00:08:17 but they would just eat with their hands. And when she, he, with a fork, everybody thought it was so scandalous. It burned her? Well, no, she died of the plague. And then the head cardinal in the region said, it's because she ate with a fork.
Starting point is 00:08:33 Are you kidding me? Yeah, no, for real. There wasn't a guy who held up a phone to the fork and was like, hey, I can't think of a famous fork company. Anyway, you know that new... Always had a co. Fork co. You know that new sound you're looking for? Well, listen to this.
Starting point is 00:08:53 It's, yeah, so anyways, the lady brought the fork. What year, like, they just used their hands? They used, yeah, they would... But how long ago was that, like, 1900s? 1920s? 1920, it was before when it was during world war one but yeah everybody thought it was so like the height of do you think the guy that came up with the spork thought this was going to be big too yeah i think the guy who thought uh the the spork was going to explode and everybody was like, no, it's fine.
Starting point is 00:09:26 I can have both. Like, you know what I mean? Yeah. I've never used a spork before. No, me either. You? No. I feel like that's like a camping thing.
Starting point is 00:09:34 Yeah, I was thinking camping as well, but I was also thinking plastic. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I feel like a spork in a canteen. That makes sense. Have you ever seen it? Oh, it's like
Starting point is 00:09:43 because you're packing light. I don't have room for a spoon and a fork. Yeah, I need my gun and my canteen and my spork and a canteen. That makes sense. Oh, it's like because you're packing light. I don't have room for a spoon and a fork. Yeah, I need my gun and my canteen and my spork. But I would just tie my fork and knife to my hat or something to keep bugs away. Sure.
Starting point is 00:09:56 And it's a nice wind chime. Keeps bears away while you walk through the woods. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I don't know because there hasn't been utensil-wise, anything that's caught on basically since the fork. Yeah, I'm guessing chopsticks were pre-fork. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:12 Yeah, like they— But a world apart. But, yeah, like spoon, knife, fork, chopsticks. Am I missing? Is there some—and then hands, like there's still lots of— Your hands, yeah. —culture that you can eat. Well, there's the corn cob holders.
Starting point is 00:10:25 Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. But I'm thinking like if somebody came up with a new utensil. Right. Like the spork was probably the last thing. Does the straw count? I mean, the straw was probably pretty wild. That was wild.
Starting point is 00:10:40 But that would have been, that was maybe like, there was maybe a hollowed out stick or like something in nature that resembled a straw. I feel like a straw was like thrown in like Coney Island in the 30s. Oh, yeah. Come on around. Look at this crazy stick. Going to the World's Fair. The water from the bottom comes right up to the top. We just bit the ends off a Twizzler.
Starting point is 00:11:01 Alexander Graham Bell, I think, used to drink soup out of a glass straw. Really? Yeah. He was weird. That's so odd. Can you imagine? He probably invented a bunch of stuff that totally didn't catch on, and the phone was the one thing that was like...
Starting point is 00:11:15 Really? Does he have other inventions? Yeah. All these inventors didn't just invent one thing, and then they must have invented a bunch of crap. Right. Like the soup, the glass soup straw. So hot.
Starting point is 00:11:26 So hot on your lips. But, yeah, I don't know. Like, I don't know, man. If somebody's out there working on utensils. I remember when my brother got married, my parents, my mother made him. I think my mother made them because she does, like, metal work. She made these float straw metal work uh she made these float straws and she made a big deal about it float straw it's for when you're having a root
Starting point is 00:11:50 beer float it's a spoon it's basically like the slurpee spoon oh straws with a spoon on the end oh wow uh but it's made of metal and you you drink through it but it's also got a little spoon on the end and she was like i got you i made you these because we lost our old ones. But how often are you eating? Are you having root beer floats? I have one with every dinner. That's how I round up my day. A food-specific utensil is pretty weird.
Starting point is 00:12:19 Yeah. Yeah. Well, I guess the shish kebab, that's an all-in-one, right? A skewer? A skewer, yeah. And then... Steak knives, that's specific for a steak. Yeah, I feel like...
Starting point is 00:12:32 Butter knives? Like knife was probably the first. Right. And then probably spoon came along when people were sick of dunking their hands in soup. I think spoon was probably before knife. Yeah, maybe. Or it was probably something that cut whatever off and then you could lift it to your mouth.
Starting point is 00:12:49 It was a, whatever, a spoon knife. I just picture like a utensil historian screaming at this podcast. Yeah. No! Send us a timeline. I want to see like a an infographic the evolving
Starting point is 00:13:08 of utensils yeah I wonder well the first was like a stick that they used to collect ants before oh yeah
Starting point is 00:13:14 when we were apes and like what if we just start drinking like some sort of you know
Starting point is 00:13:22 gelatinous fluid that has all the you know nutrients we need that's gonna need its own utensil right be it a straw or uh some sort of sure injector yeah injector a lot of food tool yeah yeah uh like we've got a a whole drawer of stuff that like every time abby's mom comes to visit she she brings me three or four new things that i was like well i i know you like kitchen stuff and you have everything already so here are the new things i found huh there's still newer stuff coming the latest thing she got me was
Starting point is 00:13:58 um it's basically like when you're slow slow cooking something and you put like a sprig of thyme and rosemary. You put those roasting herbs. Yeah. They're all on sticks. They're all just like right out of the garden. Oh, right. Okay. And she gave me this like silicone thing that holds them so they don't break apart into the food.
Starting point is 00:14:22 So it's basically like a big silicone tea bag for your for your herbs for your roasting herbs wow that's how much kitchen tools i have that i've graduated to that level oh my god wow 10,000 do you really need it i know you don't need any of it yeah well you don't need a fork. Obviously, they got by without it. It's easier than picking out little bits of rosemary from your shanks. Yeah, I like to think in the year 3000 that people would be like, can you believe that people picked out their rosemary from a bunch of savages?
Starting point is 00:15:00 But it's great. I look forward to using it. It's not really slow roasting season though at the moment. Got to wait until it's wetter weather. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I saw the most interesting utensil. I guess you could consider it an utensil. Online, it was like an automatic egg cracker.
Starting point is 00:15:14 Yeah, I saw that. Did you see that on Facebook? I was on, and there was like an attachment that separated the yolk from the- Chaff. From the chaff. Yeah. Is that the word for it? No, the white.
Starting point is 00:15:27 Okay. But how does it, what is it like, it's like a can opener kind of thing? No, it's, I thought it was so cool. I can't explain it.
Starting point is 00:15:35 I can't explain it. I think it's just like this sort of like, almost like a nutcracker thing. Yeah, it kind of like slices and pulls apart perfectly. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:43 Like so perfectly. Like I was like watching it, I was like watching. I was like, man, that is... And of course, in the commercial, there's people struggling with like eating a muffin. Like, oh, it's flag shells.
Starting point is 00:15:53 Yeah, yeah, she did do that. And it was like a finished quiche. And she was like, duh! Why am I cracking eggs and then just walking away and not even looking? Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:04 Because I'm very busy. I would love to see, like, an infomercial like that where, like, things happen to their lives, variables, but they blame it on the fact that they can't crack the egg properly. Like, a daughter comes home with an interracial relationship, and he's like, no! He blames the egg cracker. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:22 Oh, if I didn't get one of these egg crackers. I blame the egg crackers. Um, yeah, I don't know. Like there's, it's amazing that, that it's been,
Starting point is 00:16:33 it's 2015 and something that's so simplistic and it's not, it's just a mechanism. Yeah. It should have came out this year. Cause it easily came out like 10 years ago. Yeah. Now. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:43 Or 50 years ago. Or maybe there's like, there's like a, a utensil tycoon is like keeping things back. Like, Oh yeah. You're not ready for it. Yeah. And just now? Yeah, or 50 years ago. Or maybe there's like a utensil tycoon who's like keeping things back. Oh, yeah, you're not ready for it. Yeah, I watch back. No, no, no, no. Let's just get the slap chop
Starting point is 00:16:52 and then we get this out. Yeah, big utensil. God, you're evil. You just look over looking at the city, right? Yeah, the fork lobby. Even his dad. But I don't even own
Starting point is 00:17:04 that many utensils. Total. Like, I think I've got a couple of forks and some spoons. Right. A knife or two. My mom. A whisk. Do you like to cook?
Starting point is 00:17:15 No, I hate it. But a spatula. Right. What do you mean spatula? The flipper or the... Oh, a flipper. Yeah, a flipper. Is that not a spatula? Well, they call the other thing a spatula. Oh, the thing uh Flipper Yeah Flipper Is that not a spatula
Starting point is 00:17:26 Well they call The other thing a spatula Oh the thing that you mix Yeah Yeah The little rubber guy Yeah Oh yeah
Starting point is 00:17:33 I don't have a lot of utensils either When we were talking about Do you cook I do cook But not very well What's your signature dish I don't know I just reheat
Starting point is 00:17:42 Fish and chicken And make sure Some of the greens on the plate When we were talking about straws I couldn't help but I just reheat fish and chicken and make sure something green is on the plate. When we're talking about straws, I couldn't help but think my mom used to
Starting point is 00:17:49 do this. My mom's from a third world country. She's from Peru. So she still has third world tendencies. So like she'll be like, hey, there was
Starting point is 00:17:58 like an old hockey helmet in this guy's front lawn. Take it. Like why? Like this, it's garbage. Take it. Get it. It was on his front lawn. Take it. I don't want to touch it, but you take it like why like this but it's garbage it was on his front lawn take it like like
Starting point is 00:18:07 i don't want to touch it but you take it yeah and it's been discarded she's it's still good right she still has that tendency yeah i guess where you have to reuse things out of necessity but my mom would always we'd always go to mcdonald's and she'd always take like a handful of straws yeah always and ketchup i'm talking like a handful of straws. Yeah. Always. And ketchup. I'm talking like a fistful. Like, you know, like you ever see those pictures of a guy that has like a record amount of cigarettes in his mouth. That guy? Right.
Starting point is 00:18:35 Yeah. He'd have that many straws. And we'd have, we would use straws once, like you'd have a glass of water at home or like some soda and you would like drink it from the glass yeah why would you ever need a straw at home you know what i mean if royalty drops by you want to here have our finest yellow and white straws yeah obviously stolen and she had like a drawer full of them if you make a shamrock shake at home yeah and she always grabbed them like we had enough oh wow it was kind of like hoarder-ish. So, on the one hand, she would steal these things from McDonald's, but on the other hand, she would overuse them at home and like, take off and say, like, the straw supply is endless. Like, I don't have insulation, I'm just full of straws. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:19 Just sending you to school every day with a new straw. Here, have a pen. That's a straw. There's a pen in it. Yeah, I was at Starbucks the other day, and I was at the, what do you call it? Like, Fixin's? Yeah, the Fixin's. Yeah, the Fixin's.
Starting point is 00:19:38 Where they have jimmies. Yeah, the Starbucks salad bar. And I saw a guy take so many napkins he took like a phone book size of napkins yeah and and just jammed it in his uh no he did in his pants no in his uh his hoodie oh pouch okay was he disenfranchised is he like no no no no he's like a businessman well he was wearing a hoodie so he's somewhere between disenfranchised and businessman. But man, he took a lot of napkins.
Starting point is 00:20:09 I fully support that. How many, like a stack like yay much? I'm not going to do that, but I'm in favor of it. Because sometimes there's a place I go to for noodles on the go, called Noodles on the Go. No, it's called Noodle Box.
Starting point is 00:20:26 And the napkins come out one at a time, and you have to make a big thing. And I always get it to go. Right. I'm grabbing a bunch of napkins, like whipping out four. Sure, sure. They're like Kleenex. They treat them like Kleenex. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:38 For some reason. But I just want, and I get why they do it, because I don't want someone. Yeah, discouraging you from like taking a step. From grabbing a whole heap. But I think if I saw somebody at a noodle place or a burrito place doing it, I'd be like, that's a person who doesn't want to get stuff on their clothes. Yeah, right. This guy had a coffee with a lid on it.
Starting point is 00:20:57 Yeah. I was like, what are you... Yeah, the napkins at a Starbucks are to clean up the coffee you spilled while putting sugar in your coffee. It reminds me of, remember when we were young, you'd like comedians tell stories of how to save money on the road. And like what you do is you take all the toilet paper. What? From the hotel?
Starting point is 00:21:16 From the hotel. And you take your old light bulbs that are burnt down and switch them with their light bulbs and you have fresh light bulbs. I've never heard that one before. There's like a lot of Ontario comedians that would have, that are true road dogs. Right. Like,
Starting point is 00:21:28 I don't know if they say names, but like, I've heard of stories where like, like they just like have these like, how to like save money on the road store. Like you buy like Kraft dinner and you make it in the coffee per capita. Coffee pot.
Starting point is 00:21:39 I was taught that, that you buy like a can of stew or whatever. Right. And then you heat it up in the coffee pot yeah you take all the hotel in the hotel yeah it's all in the hotel so you take the toilet paper always a bit funny if you're just like a guy who got it all wrong like what you do is you make you make crap dinner in the toilet and you shoot in the percolator to show them who's boss
Starting point is 00:21:59 yeah i've uh i'm trying to think if I ever heard... Did you ever, when you were starting comedy, I was thinking about this the other day. Did you ever get a bit of advice from an old-time comic about something like, never, you can never do this. Like, one comic told me never to wear flashy shoes. Yeah, I've heard that too.
Starting point is 00:22:21 Really? I think I maybe heard it from you, though. Yeah, like, because it'll distract from your face. face like if people are looking at your shoes wow but like yeah who beyond the front row can see your shoes i guess depending on the venue yeah and i think it was advice aimed at uh some sort of zoot suit wearing character or at like look at this Kid's got better shoes Than me What do you say I don't know Just Yeah
Starting point is 00:22:47 We're Calming down I was told Never wear shorts Yeah I feel like That's true I feel like that's fair
Starting point is 00:22:55 That's fair I feel like That holds up Yeah But was there ever one That it was like I'm trying to think of Like advice
Starting point is 00:23:01 I'm thinking about The first time I did stand up I was really young. I was 17. Okay. Where did you do it? Like a club? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:09 Yuck Yucks Comedy Club in Toronto. And, uh, I wanted to be a comedian for a while. And then I went and I remember back in the day they used to have like the source seminar thing where you'd sit down, the headliner would talk and he would like, you know, Hey, all right. So, uh, we're going to help, help you write jokes. And he asked everyone to say would like, you know, hey, all right, so we're going to help you write jokes. And he'd ask everyone to say things, and they'd workshop bits and stuff like that. Yeah, and you're like, where do you get your toilet paper? Let me tell you.
Starting point is 00:23:33 And I remember being young and nervous, and it was getting late. It was like 11.30, and I was still in high school. And there was a guy who was with me, first time too, and he was just like Rick Moranis like exactly like Rick Moranis oh wow good comedy and I remember him saying to me I was like I think I'm gonna go I'm just gonna leave it's getting really late he goes no no no it's like oh man I'm really nervous and I'm kind of looking down he's like and I don't remember him having this with him. I swear to God,
Starting point is 00:24:05 he was just like, he's just giving me advice saying, just be yourself. I was like, okay. And then I turn around and he's like, tuning a violin. And I'm like,
Starting point is 00:24:17 what's that? And he's like, oh, I'm going to incorporate classical music with comedy. Oh, so it's going to be like, or whatever. He's just going to be,
Starting point is 00:24:24 so if you think it was kind of ahead of his time because, you know, like Galifianakis and guys would play piano or like, maybe Dimitri Marantz. Or behind the time because what's his name?
Starting point is 00:24:31 Henny Youngman used to show up with a violin. But he would just play, he was just tuning his violin. I thought it was so funny to have a violin randomly appear like that. Like, just be yourself
Starting point is 00:24:40 and then he's playing a violin. Oh, man. But just like, yeah, I'm going to. And he bombed horribly. Yeah, here's what'll be popular everyone loves classical music these days yeah yeah yeah can you imagine if you went out you're you're there you're with a bachelor party at the club yeah some guy walks over the violin you're like oh boy now for some humorous haiku. Sherry's on special during my set.
Starting point is 00:25:13 I'll never forget that guy. Yeah. That was the first advice I forgot in the comedy. It was from a man with a violin. Yeah. Who's clearly crazy. Just be yourself. I forget all the advice, but so much of it was so bad. Yeah, a lot of it. It always came from the guys you didn't want so much of it was so bad. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:25 A lot of it always came from the guys who didn't want to be, I felt. Yeah, exactly. Because the guys that you wanted to be just did their own thing. And they'd say, it's like, I don't know,
Starting point is 00:25:31 man, you'll figure it out. Yeah. Good. Yeah. Good set. Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:25:34 Yeah. But there would always be a guy who would come, he would have this, uh, you know, there was one guy who used to run one of the clubs here and he used to say, like, don't use so many words with the
Starting point is 00:25:45 letter t are you serious yeah yeah he was like you're that's like he's a comedy killer yeah yeah like thanks what did i say i'm like oh yeah thanks yeah i mean yeah uh what did i say about phonemes uh but yeah he was like no you're saying too many T sounds or something. He ran a club here? Yeah, he managed a club. I've never heard of that. That's so weird. No, but it's like, that's the type of guy I'm talking about.
Starting point is 00:26:14 There's these guys who are like, don't. Somebody was telling me that somebody told him not to have anything in your pocket. I kind of, you know, there was a guy on stage recently I saw in California that had so much in his front pockets and the jeans were like his jeans were
Starting point is 00:26:31 relatively tight and I was like he has like everything like that's fine it's such a weird juxtaposition of like I want no one
Starting point is 00:26:37 to see what I have but I want people to know that I have things in my front pockets it was so bulky but like I could not stop beyond your
Starting point is 00:26:45 like phone and wallet and keys. I don't know what he had like maybe like a wig. Got a small violin. But it was so much.
Starting point is 00:26:56 It was so much I could not stop staring at the fact that his pockets were jam-packed. I once took a songwriting course in university
Starting point is 00:27:06 for great credit. Like for lyrics? Or for everything? Yeah, but it was also, there was a performance aspect to it, and the teacher gave performance tips, and she was like, never wear a watch on stage,
Starting point is 00:27:22 and before you sing, drink milk. Really? Which seems counterintuitive, but it's like, you know, you want a little bit of that. Oh, really? Why milk? I guess it creates a film of... Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:35 Cultivates saliva in your throat. Yeah. Interesting. Wow. Yeah, I don't know. I haven't had milk in like eight years. What are you... Really?
Starting point is 00:27:44 Yeah. And the reason why is because my doctor was saying I was getting, I have a deviated septum, so I was getting chronic sinus infections. Okay. And my throat was, I'm sorry, a chronic strep throat. And he said that, he asked me about my diet, and then I said that, oh, I drink a lot, I drink milk. And he's like, well, it just creates a film, and then it cultivates like bacteria, and
Starting point is 00:28:03 it sticks to it, and then you get like stre and it sticks to it and then you get strep throat. Because it's unnatural liquid to yourself. The deviated septum is always, in movies, the excuse why somebody had a nose job. Oh, really? Yeah, I feel like that's a joke I've heard a couple times in movies. You had a nose job. Oh, I had a deviated septum.
Starting point is 00:28:22 Did they ever say you had to have a surgery or something? Yeah. I snore really badly. Really? Like, like really, really badly. Like debilitatingly. Like, does it wake you up? No, this is true.
Starting point is 00:28:35 I went to go sleep over my, my folks place. This is three years ago. I was like, before you go to bed, here's a straw for your nose. No. And I was lying down on the couch and I woke up and my dad was watching TV, but really quietly. And then he turned to me and said, no woman will marry you. Oh no.
Starting point is 00:29:00 I go, why? He goes, you got to get that fixed. Because of my snoring was so bad. Really? But it's an odd thing to say to someone right when they wake up. No one will marry you. I go why Because you gotta get that fixed Because of my snoring was so bad Really But it's an odd thing to say to someone right when they wake up No one will marry you Yeah after observing your sleeping habits Which is more creepy than just watching me
Starting point is 00:29:14 Do you snore? I don't know I sleep by myself Yeah I don't have I feel like I've been around you when you were sleeping When would that have been? I don't know a... I feel like I've been around you when you were sleeping. When would that have been? I don't know. Did we ever...
Starting point is 00:29:28 Camping trip? No, we've never shared a... I don't think we've ever shared a hotel room. A thin wall? No, I don't think so. A thin wall? I've definitely had to share hotel rooms on the road. Oh, maybe like on an airplane you fell asleep.
Starting point is 00:29:40 I can see that. But that doesn't count. No, I don't know. Although I've been told that I thrash. Like an air guitar? Yeah. Yeah, you just air guitar in your sleep? Do you shred?
Starting point is 00:29:55 He's a sleeping shredder. Like apparently I just like kick and... Really? Limbs go in every which way. Do you remember that Mike Rabiglia story, which is great about sleepwalking? Yeah, where he jumped through the window. He jumped through a window and he has to sleep in this sort of sleeping bag that keeps him stable. And he's got to wear, doesn't he have to wear mittens in the sleeping bag?
Starting point is 00:30:14 Yeah, so he can't. That's so crazy. Babies are the same. You put them in a sleep sack. Oh, do you really? It's just basically that. It's like a sleeping bag with arms. But the arms are covered, yeah. Oh, wow. really? It's just basically that. It's like a sleeping bag with arms. But like the arms are covered.
Starting point is 00:30:26 Oh, wow. It gets there. We haven't done it yet. But so what? So the baby doesn't claw itself? Well, it's just so they don't startle themselves awake. Right. I think.
Starting point is 00:30:37 I wouldn't be a good dad. I wouldn't know how to do that. No. Here's your king size bed. To like a California king. Well, don't worry about it. No one's going to marry you. No. Well, don't worry about it. No one's going to marry you. No.
Starting point is 00:30:48 Yeah, we heard from your dad. Tell him again. Yeah, I don't know. What's your, do you snore? No, I don't. I don't. Except for if I sleep on my back, but I never do. Right.
Starting point is 00:31:04 But like occasionally I'll fall asleep watching TV on my back and I'll wake myself up. Right. And it'll be like, I'll look over at Abby and I'll just say, sorry. And turn over onto my side. I think that I snore, I have to be on my side specifically in a certain way. And then I will be, it will be limited. Right. But when I was living with, staying with this girl for a while, be, it will be limited. Right. But when I was living with,
Starting point is 00:31:25 staying with this girl for a while, I trained myself to sleep better because just through her pushing me or whatever. But now that I'm on my own
Starting point is 00:31:32 for over a year and a half, I don't, I don't know what's happening. Yeah. But it's fine. I have my own. I wonder if I should go to a sleep clinic
Starting point is 00:31:38 or something. I find that kind of creepy. Yeah. Just have people moderating me and watching me. I just picture like an Ed Harris character in like Truman Show looking looking at rubbing a screen oh i imagine
Starting point is 00:31:49 it like alien with the like chambers that they all oh yeah they're like where they go into like a cryogenic freeze or whatever yeah i uh i don't know do you sleep in a pod i remember one time i had the crazy notion of getting a hammock to sleep in. Oh, for like everyday sleeping? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But also to save money? No, no, no. I don't think I was trying to save money.
Starting point is 00:32:15 Well, you didn't want to buy a mattress? No. I had a mattress. But I was like, what if I just change things up and I get a fucking hammock? You sleep in a hammock all the time. That's got to be horrible for your back. Well, and a girl was like, well, you'll never have sex again. Like, nobody's going to come over.
Starting point is 00:32:33 Imagine you brought a woman home and they're like, oh, we're going to do this in a hammock. Yeah. And then I put on like, just like sailor tunes on a record. Shanties. Yeah, shanties. I remember we went over to some friend's house once and they had a hammock
Starting point is 00:32:53 just in the, they had like a loft space and they just had a hammock in there. And I had never been on a hammock as far as I knew. And I was wearing cargo shorts, like the one pair of cargo shorts I've ever owned. And I got in the hammock and then the button
Starting point is 00:33:12 that was holding my cargo... Cot? Thing, yeah. Oh no. The cargo pocket closed just like shot off. And then I stayed in the hammock for a couple more minutes
Starting point is 00:33:24 and when I got out, the other pocket on the other side just shot right off. So, like, I lost two buttons in one hammock trip. Oh, man. What a traumatic hammock experience. Oh, man. I don't think I've ever been in a hammock. I have once. And it's outdoors.
Starting point is 00:33:41 I find it kind of scary. The idea that, like, that horse is like. One hammock time you've been in and you were considering sleeping full time in a hammock? Wow. Yeah. Yeah, I was really going through something. I have a little bit of anxiety to get in one, I think. Because the idea of it spinning around and me falling over, I feel like could have practically...
Starting point is 00:34:01 But you don't have to be very far off the ground. That's true. You can do, you can have a, you know, it's not gonna kill you to fall two feet. But, uh, uh, past, uh, past guest Erica Sigurdsson, uh, her and her, uh, uh, boyfriend, husband, uh,
Starting point is 00:34:18 they go. Long time fiance. Long time fiance. Uh, they go camping, and they go, like, they set up a hammock, like, in the trees. Like, really? Yeah. And they, like, sleep in that. Like Ewok style. Yeah, Ewok style. Or that's what, like, when mountain climbers
Starting point is 00:34:34 on rock faces, they'll have to set up, like, a... Ewok style. Which is also a sexual move, Ewok style. You have sex and then just throw rocks at... That's how I order at In-N-Out Burger. Yeah, give it to me um yeah like what if uh if you because you know how sometimes when you go on vacation and then you wake up and you forget you have like a 10 seconds where you're like where the fuck am i
Starting point is 00:34:58 no oh that happens to me all the time really not having to you just blank blank out no like i wake up and i have no idea where I am. Like I know I'm somewhere, but I'm not like... Oh, so you don't think you're nowhere. No, I don't think I'm nowhere, but you wake up and you're like... What is nowhere? I don't know. The thing in the Matrix where it's all white?
Starting point is 00:35:17 Even in your own home? No, no, no. Like when I'm on the road. Oh, okay. You know, you'll wake up and you'll be like, where am I? I've never had that. Really? I've heard of comics say that. Yeah. It depends how long the road trip is but like what if you were in one
Starting point is 00:35:29 of those hammocks on a rock face when you woke up and you thought you were sleeping at home and then you wake up and you're like oh no i'm gonna climb up or down to get out of this situation boy hard hard start to the day yeah i think you sleep train at home In a hammock on a wall Sleep train Yeah, that's right You slowly build up to it Dave, what's going on with you, man? Well, now that we got to the bottom
Starting point is 00:35:54 Of what's going on with Eddie Yeah Straws Straws Here's what's going on with me Not very much I was sick all week So
Starting point is 00:36:03 What'd you have? Just a cold? Just a cold Cold Just a cold. Cold and flu season. Yeah. Cough due to cold. But I do watch a lot of YouTube videos. Oh, yes.
Starting point is 00:36:13 And this one set of videos has been, you know when you watch a YouTube video, you get the pre-roll commercial? Yeah. I've had the same, like not always the same one, but the same kind of pre-roll commercial yeah i've had the the same like not always the same one but the same kind of pre-roll commercial for like a year and i do you guys get the same ones or are they they mix them up i got the same one for a long time and it's a very specific one right now i'm getting
Starting point is 00:36:39 a kevin uh getting a which one i think it's like an Under Armour shoe one. Oh, okay. What's your specific one? It's this fucking dude in a garage with a Lamborghini. Oh, that guy. Yeah. Yeah. And he's like, he's doing a selfie thing.
Starting point is 00:36:52 Like, you like this car? Yeah. And I'm like, I don't. I like reading books too. Yeah. I,
Starting point is 00:36:58 uh, being a mentor is good. Yeah. He, uh, I watched a full minute of it. He talks, he's like,
Starting point is 00:37:04 I love this car, but I love my books even more. And he's got his books in a garage. Yeah, he, I watched a full minute of it. He talks, he's like, I love this car, but I love my books even more. And he's got his books in a garage. Yeah, you know. I got to watch that whole commercial. I should.
Starting point is 00:37:14 I see it right away and I don't, I don't watch it. The one I've been getting. I get him a lot. I get this very muscular Asian man. Yes.
Starting point is 00:37:23 Oh, the guy that eats anything you want? He's got peanut butter and steak on the table. A ponytail too? Yeah, there's a bunch of them. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:29 But yeah, it's either him eating food with like the grossest lip-smacking sound. Yeah, yeah. We specifically
Starting point is 00:37:37 miked this pudding. Isn't it weird that we all feel like I thought I was the only one that saw that commercial. We had this sort of unity of it. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:46 Like they were targeting me because they know every other thing I watch is pizza something. Or it's like, one of them starts with, there's one dirty little workout secret. Oh, yeah. Or this one evil secret. And he, he does the Dr. Evil. Does he really? Like finger to his mouth, but he doesn't commit to it completely. So he, he like starts to laugh as it's happening, but it's just edited so quickly. Oh God.
Starting point is 00:38:19 Wow. So I finally, after a year of this guy being before every video I watched, I was like, well, maybe there's something to it. So I was like, okay, I'll watch one of his videos. They're all 20 minutes long. Oh, wow. Oh, yeah. How much does he have to pay to get that kind of advertising push? I know, because he's getting, like, his, I looked up his videos.
Starting point is 00:38:40 The most has 15 million views. Okay. Which is good, I guess. Yeah. looked up his videos the most has 15 million views okay which is good i guess yeah um of course yeah yes it's good but like what are you paying versus what are you receiving or is he selling something else like he's been like i've been watching those commercials for like a long time yeah i'm like why don't i i only watch them for about four seconds yeah and then i skip them yeah but like he's been showing up and he's like always always has like eight Tupperwares full of food that I like, I can eat whatever I want.
Starting point is 00:39:08 And he's like ripped and like, I got a secret and like, I don't want to know your secret. But the one video I watched, it was like, uh, how to get rid of your love handles. Yeah. And, uh, here's the secret. Um, you can eat whatever you want. No, I wouldn't have. And, uh, you have to work out, uh, here wouldn't imagine. And you have to work out. Here's the secret, guys.
Starting point is 00:39:29 You have to work out at least four times a week. Oh, no, thanks. At least 20 minutes. But don't do this one exercise. Huh. What is it, sit-ups? Please tell me it's sit-ups. Any of the ones that would build muscle under your love handles because they would make the love handles bigger.
Starting point is 00:39:43 Ah. Okay. Okay, so that's a good tip. under your love handles because they would make the love handles bigger. Ah. Okay. Okay. So that's a good tip. But that was two minutes into this 18 minute video. Oh, brother.
Starting point is 00:39:51 I'm assuming the rest is watching him work out. The Lamborghini guy I wonder about. Well, I don't know who he is. It'd be cool if like he had like
Starting point is 00:40:00 a suit like this car. Yeah. And then you're like, no, but like at the end of the video he just shows you a dead body but no one ever knew. Yeah. No one ever made it that far. It's him just trying this car? Yeah. And then you're like, no, but like the end of the video, he just shows you a dead body, but no one ever knew.
Starting point is 00:40:05 No one's ever made it that far. It's him just trying to confess. Yeah. It's like the end of a porno. No one's ever seen it. Yeah. Wow. It really,
Starting point is 00:40:15 that really went on for quite a amount of years. The credits in a porno. Oh, look, oh, look who was a fluffer on this. Oh,
Starting point is 00:40:22 are they do them funny like naked gun style at the end of a porno? Oh, look who was a fluffer on this. Or they do them funny like naked gun style at the end of the porn. Oh, boy. Oh, man. Oh, a recipe for porno chili. Oh. Porno chili.
Starting point is 00:40:34 That's what this is all about. Oh. So, yeah, I finally watched, well, two minutes of one of the videos. Yeah. But they had one, I was looking at all of his videos, and one of them was like about his transformation. It had him posing
Starting point is 00:40:48 for like a before picture. Right. Right. Naturally, yeah. But like, how did he know that he was going to get this super ripped?
Starting point is 00:40:56 Like, a chubby guy doesn't know he's gonna... Right, well, I take that photo. Yeah, but like,
Starting point is 00:41:00 and like, totally posed properly for this video that he was doing. Maybe it was like a goal. He was like, I'm gonna get ripped and this is the first photo. Yeah, and this will and like, totally posed properly for this video that he was doing. Maybe it was like a goal. He was like, I'm going to get ripped. And this is the first photo. Yeah, and this will be.
Starting point is 00:41:09 And I will. This will be, yeah. Or maybe we're giving too much credit. It's obviously probably Photoshopped or something. But, well, yeah. Or maybe it's just a similar looking guy. Did I tell you about, there was a guy who, he like, he wrote a piece about it that he was a professional weightlifter. Like he was a,
Starting point is 00:41:27 um, personal trainer and he would get com companies would offer him money to gain weight, have a picture taken, really use their product while he was losing the weight so that he could legit say, I use this and I use this and I lost. Right. So it's honestly true that he did get fat and then transformed himself with this product.
Starting point is 00:41:49 Yeah, but that's what he does. He does that eight hours a day. Because the everyday person may not know what to do to get that ripped, almost like that guy does. Yeah, that guy does. That's his full job. Well, it's not that he knows,
Starting point is 00:42:01 it's that he's eight hours a day doing it. Yeah, and also, like, he gains the weight so that they can take the pictures and do the testimony. Wouldn't it be great if, like, he tells friends,
Starting point is 00:42:11 like, what are you eating so much? Yeah, it's for a roll. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Before. I've always been a before guy. But also, the before guy, always, they're like, eh, make sure you have
Starting point is 00:42:20 shitty posture, too. Yeah, like, really, like, sink in your chest and wear this ugly shirt. Yeah, and also, like, have, like, a not a good hair situation. Yeah. Like really, like sink in your chest. Yeah. And also like have like a not a good hair. Yeah. And have the lighting be bad. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:30 Before and after for guys, for like hair clipper men always made me laugh. Those guys were the worst. Well, it's man, some of the things you're just like, why did you not shave off your hair? Why did you have,
Starting point is 00:42:41 you know, like the horseshoe of long hair around your bald head yeah there was a time when i was a kid i'd be like i'd count how many times they had those commercials and be like always someone jumping out of a pool always yeah oh yeah look at it so resilient so believable so believable yeah the woman pushing her fingers through it. Jeremy Piven did a surgery where he removed the back strip of hair from his neck and put it on the front of his head. Because if you look at him from Seinfeld, remember he played George Costanza? Oh, yeah, yeah. He was bald.
Starting point is 00:43:16 He was completely bald. And now he's got a full head. He's got a beautiful Kevin James-esque natural hair. He also, there's like a book coming out that's like by Ari Gold, who isn't a real guy. Oh, really? Well, it's based on a real guy. Oh, is it really? Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:32 Ari something else. But it's the character has written a book. Oh, really? Yeah. Ari's Guide to Hugs. It's a hug and an F. Yeah. Ari's Guide to Bitches Who Hug
Starting point is 00:43:45 Oh man Is that movie out yet? No I follow the Entourage Movie Twitter account And retweet them From time to time
Starting point is 00:43:54 I think about going back And watching the show again No no No No don't spend Don't do that with your time Like have you Yeah there's a bunch of shows
Starting point is 00:44:03 You probably haven't seen That are really good That's true but Living in California now maybe I can re-appreciate, like, the references, maybe? Oh, yeah. Like, when they run into, you know, Debbie Mazur. You'll be like, I know who that is. When Johnny Drum was, like, in the valley and he won't go there because it's too hot. I didn't know what that meant.
Starting point is 00:44:24 Oh, now. Now I know because I lived there for six months. But you don't have to watch a thing. You just know that already. That's true. Yeah. No, watch something else that you've never seen. Have you seen everything?
Starting point is 00:44:34 Have you seen the whole show? I think I've seen the whole show. Yeah. I think. I can't remember. I absolutely have. I'm a completist. I didn't see it.
Starting point is 00:44:43 How does it end? I never saw that. Also, you know what? Like, I've seen every episode of Entourage. Didn't watch, like, didn't completely hate watch it. Like, I got. Right. I got.
Starting point is 00:44:55 Yeah. Enjoyment out of it. Yeah. Right. But, like, some shows, like, that people love, like, one episode of Friday Night Lights, and I'm like, fuck this. No episode of, of Friday night lights. And I'm like, fuck this. No,
Starting point is 00:45:07 I never got into that. One episode of, uh, the West wing. Like this is, these characters are not real. No, that was Johnny drama.
Starting point is 00:45:16 That was the same. When I watched that one, uh, it's the other one from the same guy did the West wing. Oh, the newsroom. Yeah. I was like,
Starting point is 00:45:24 Nope. I was that way with, uh, uh, sports night from, uh, is that the same guy did the west wing oh the newsroom yeah i was like nope i was that way with uh sports night from uh that's the same guy yeah okay i think but i love he wrote the facebook movie yeah he wrote really good um uh money ball which is your favorite yeah who is this uh aaron sorkin i think i just love i think he's good writer. I just think the characters that he creates are garbage. So like anytime he has to create characters for a TV show, it's like,
Starting point is 00:45:49 who, why are they all preaching to each other? Right. Yeah. I got into Boardwalk Empire a lot. Yeah. I haven't seen it. Is it good?
Starting point is 00:45:58 I just like that era of time. I fell short. I just got bored by like the third season. There was a, there was a point where I was like a little bit boring. Yeah. I'd like Mad Men 2. Yeah. I kind of like fear like a little bit boring. Yeah. I like Mad Men too.
Starting point is 00:46:05 Yeah. I kind of like fear binge watching because I feel like it'll just take over my life. I just get so into it. Yeah, let it. That's what I say. Yeah, maybe. Yeah, man. But I'm like, I watch it at night and then I'm up till five in the morning and I'm like.
Starting point is 00:46:18 Oh, where do you got to be? Yeah. And I just run out of here. He left his jacket and his shoes. Wow. You're so passionate about the cause. Yeah And I just run out of here He left his jacket And his shoes Wow You're so passionate About the cause I just watched that
Starting point is 00:46:30 Going Clear The documentary About Scientology Oh yeah I can't wait to watch that Is that the one Where they got the guy That left Scientology
Starting point is 00:46:37 A bunch of guys From the BBC No Is that the different one It's an HBO documentary Oh yeah yeah Okay I want to watch that And they've got a bunch of guys who left Scientology.
Starting point is 00:46:46 There's a couple of BBC ones that are really good. But I had read the book, Going Clear, and I finished it the day before the documentary came out, and then I watched it. And you know that thing where, like, I've never had this, where you've read the book before you've seen the thing, and you're like, oh, the books matter. I'm not enjoying that superiority i didn't get a chance to like throw it in anyone's
Starting point is 00:47:12 faces i'm so mad what's the point of reading a book yeah if you can't uh yeah to really you know show everybody yeah like hey i look at the Scientology building in LA is so creepy. The blue one? Yeah, the blue one. I drove by and it's like, all the windows have this, the exact same shutter on them.
Starting point is 00:47:32 It was a hospital. Oh, was it really? It makes sense. It looks like an insane asylum or something, like at a shutter island. Yeah, now who's running the asylum?
Starting point is 00:47:40 Am I right? Now, Graham. Yes. What's going on with you? Well, I went to Kelowna and Penticton this week. I think I heard a story about what happened in Penticton. About Eckler.
Starting point is 00:47:55 Yeah, yeah. Well, there was two. Both nights were awful. Both nights were awful. You went with Kevin Banner? With Kevin Banner. Was he on both shows? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:07 I know he posted one picture of the stage. Oh, that was balanced on eight kegs? Are you kidding me? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my God. So the first gig, that was in Cologne. It was at a casino. This is in the interior of British Columbia in the, where would you call it? The Okanagan.
Starting point is 00:48:24 The Okanagan. okanagan wine country but you but also tribal tattoo country yeah like that's the thing is sleeveless country you get half an hour outside of vancouver and then you may as well be in uh fucking you, the bayou somewhere. Like, it just, you're just like, what, how, how do, how is a three hour drive?
Starting point is 00:48:50 Right. These people vote completely different from me. Yeah. And it's consistent across the country, anywhere. Like, Toronto too,
Starting point is 00:48:56 you just leave and it's like, they don't even, not even remotely a part of the bigger city. I guess, I mean, it's a rebellious thing.
Starting point is 00:49:04 Maybe like, maybe we want to be like our own thing. I don't know. Well guess maybe it's a rebellious thing. Maybe we want to be our own thing. I don't know. Wasn't it a big thing in Toronto that they incorporated all those suburbs? And then they elected Rob Ford. And then the cyclists
Starting point is 00:49:18 who actually live in the city all got screwed because everyone was like, no, no, trucks rule. Yeah, everybody who took a public transit was just flushed down the toilet. But I think in comedy, we see it very well
Starting point is 00:49:30 because we perform in front of these people. It's like, oh man, we're only an hour away, but it feels like we're 10 hours away. Yeah, it feels like we just are in deliverance. So you're like, what? But we're not, you know, and it's all internet now.
Starting point is 00:49:42 We're all connected. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can order things on the internet and get them the same day I do. Yeah. It's not like the movie The Village. They know what's beyond the trees. Yeah. So there's, like, some small town.
Starting point is 00:49:52 Like, what are you guys watching on Netflix? Yeah, exactly. Hunting videos. Why? What else is there on there? Hunting videos. You know, different videos about how to hunt. My cousin lives around there and,
Starting point is 00:50:07 uh, maybe not even around there, somewhere in the interior. Yeah. And like every, I'm friends with him on Facebook and every year it's like every Christmas it's like, check out the new guns I got. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:50:20 Yeah. Like that was exactly like we, as you're driving out, all of a sudden there's no more cars. It's all trucks. Right. And then more and more like stickers on the back that are of a deer's head. And you're like, okay, like I don't get this.
Starting point is 00:50:37 Right, right. And then we also saw a weird, you know the stickers that the, uh, stickers that people have a stick people. Yeah. Their family. Dad and kids. All of them are like holding a gun. Well, no, it was like a weird one where it was like the stick figure was like, uh, like having fellatio on another stick figure.
Starting point is 00:50:57 Are you kidding me? Yeah. And I was like, but like Kevin was like, he's like, I can't understand what I'm looking at. Were they both male? Were they like still kids, thick figures watching? It's supposed to be telling you who's in this car. Yeah, that's what we were like.
Starting point is 00:51:16 Does that mean that's happening right now? Some guy's blowing a guy while driving. If so, I'm glad I know this. I'll just keep my clearance. So, yeah, so we go to know this. Yeah. Keep my clearance. So, yeah, so we go to this gig
Starting point is 00:51:28 and it's in a casino and so we think, you know, go in and it's tables and it's all going to be nice. Was this Penticton or Kelowna? This is Kelowna
Starting point is 00:51:36 and we only just start the show and there's a group with a couple of gals that are so drunk. Mm-hmm. that are so drunk.
Starting point is 00:51:47 Like Las Vegas drunk. But this is in Kelowna and it's Friday night and it's 8 p.m. There's a lot of money there too, right? Yeah. So I feel like some people feel entitled and they're like, yeah, whatever. Yeah. What's the industry like? Drugs. Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:52:00 I feel like it's a lot of Alberta money goes there too. Yeah, and a lot of like, Hey, I paid $200 rent. So that's why. Yeah. So this lady got so, she was so drunk and she was talking super loud and somebody came over and said like, quiet down or I'll have to kick you out.
Starting point is 00:52:17 Uh, which was immediately followed by like, what the fuck? Like what the fuck? And, uh, so she was taken out into the casino area and i was going out to use the bathroom and then she like smashed her drink on the floor what spiked it yeah spiked it and uh the like security like swarmed oh my and was like okay you got to give us your id because you're banned from the
Starting point is 00:52:45 casino for life and then we find out that she's the girlfriend of a guy who they're all there for his birthday oh so i was just like what the i know this is like a tired sort of uh discussion but why do they go to comedy for birthdays or but the boyfriend was fine he was like i'm very sorry about this and you know giving over the id and like i understand we'll leave immediately right but she was like i've never been traded like this i've never been traded like this so the one guy who should be drunk is the guy who's keeping the peace. Yeah, he's the designated driver. So then that show was awkward as fuck. And then we go to Penticton.
Starting point is 00:53:34 And for some reason in my head. And I just want to say, like, we have listeners who live in small towns. Yeah. I guess. I'm not hating on small towns. But you hate it too, right? But, so, like, we go to Penticton, which in my head, I think, is going to be, like, more of, like, a hippie enclave. I've never been there.
Starting point is 00:53:55 Well, what kind of town is it? Well, it's largely, like, their thing is that they sell fruit. Yeah. Like, every... Really? There's, like, fruit stands everywhere, and they have a peach festival. So people go there. yeah like every there's like fruit stands everywhere and they have a peach festival people but the peach festival the famous peach festival is people there's a giant peach that has like a booth where people are it's like an information booth or i don't know yeah and every
Starting point is 00:54:14 year they just tip it over there's a riot yeah they throw it in the lake when your empty hammer was playing. So we get to the venue, which is a bar, and the guy, like we've been told, oh, it always sells out. We get there, almost empty. And somebody goes, oh, I think it's because Marilyn Manson's playing in town. And I was like, what the fuck? Why? Why is that the same people that go to a show? Manson's playing in town. And I was like, what the fuck? Why? Why is that the same people that go to a show? But why is Marilyn Manson playing in Penticton?
Starting point is 00:54:52 Is it specifically in Penticton? Yeah, it was Penticton. He was in Penticton playing a show. That's so odd. Well, I'm just like, I don't know. I thought he was doing better than... Like, I'm there, and I know how well I'm not doing. Anyway, so there's, you you know there's one guy some table at the front so drunk so drunk and uh they're they're heckling from the word go and uh you know like kevin doesn't know the name of the local hockey team, which super offends this guy at the table.
Starting point is 00:55:27 And what would you think? It's Penticton. They're known for peaches. What would their hockey team name be? The Cobblers. Yeah. You would think something fruit related, maybe? No, probably not.
Starting point is 00:55:41 The apples? The somethings? What was it? The V's. Well, yeah. Veggies? Exactly. No, just like... No, probably not. The apples? The somethings? What was it? The V's. Well, yeah, exactly. Veggies? No, just like, yeah, V's. The V8.
Starting point is 00:55:53 So, drink your vegetables. Flying V's. The guy says like, do your, do your research. So then, while Kevin's up there, I start researching like the most recent news stories from Penticton and the number one news stories from Penticton and the number one news story in Penticton is that they're having a problem with wild horses
Starting point is 00:56:10 walking all over the city and eating people's gardens. That's still a thing? That's what I said. I was like, what are you? Have we not tamed all the horses? There's also a large selection of wild cows too. There's a wolf boy as well.
Starting point is 00:56:25 A wolf boy. And then, yeah, so that show was so terrible. And did you bring that up to the audience? Yeah, because I thought it was funny. Never heard of it. Go Vs. Anyway, so yeah, the guy. And I was like, how many people are in the audience at this point?
Starting point is 00:56:43 How many people are in the audience at this point? It was probably like 30. Was it big venue did it feel cavernous or was it kind of like no it was definitely cavernous and and but it was the front table was so drunk there was one guy who kept standing up and saying stuff and uh every time i started a joke there was one guy who kept calling me fat and ugly and i was like god damn it like i mean you're ugly and but i'm like there's so many of you i can't and the bartender they keep serving them drinks so i was like oh so these guys are regulars like you're going with them over the show well yeah yeah so but i think a listener of the podcast came and saw the show.
Starting point is 00:57:25 Like, I tweeted, I'm in Penticton. And he's like, I'll come to the show. And then afterwards, he was like, man, that was rough. It unsubscribes. Oh, no. No, why? It was not worth it. Well, Graham, can I tell you?
Starting point is 00:57:39 Yeah. You're not fat. Oh, thanks, man. Thank you very much. Not according to this guy, though. No, you're not fat. A little ugly, man. Thank you very much. Not according to this guy, though. No, you're not fat. A little ugly, though. But yeah, this guy was so, just like from the second I got on stage.
Starting point is 00:57:51 And we could barely get up to this stage because it was on top of kegs. You know what I mean? They just put like some plywood on top of a keg, like eight kegs. And that was the stage. Were you performing in front of like a chicken wire? This is crazy. Oh, I would. Honestly, if there had been chicken wire
Starting point is 00:58:05 it would have at least been kind of cool, you know. But as it was Penticton stinks. I'll stick with that. Is that like a top five bad road story? Yeah, I mean it's definitely, definitely. There's a lot of variables that add to being a bad road story.
Starting point is 00:58:21 Yeah, but the fact that it's like Marilyn Manson was somehow involved in the story. It was WrestleMania weekend. That's true. But that wouldn't, like, you would just show WrestleMania instead of comedy. Yeah, yeah. But also, you know, maybe a lot of guys were home hanging up decorations.
Starting point is 00:58:41 Yeah, sure. Hanging up their stockings in case Macho Man comes down the chimney. Yeah, exactly. My worst road story, if we can bring it up. Sure, yeah. Me and a comedian by the name of Johnny Guardhouse. Yeah, yeah. We did a show in this reserve in Ontario.
Starting point is 00:59:02 Okay. Just maybe like a couple hours north of Toronto. this reserve in Ontario. Okay. Just maybe like a couple hours north of Toronto. And we go, and it's like the audience is like, you know,
Starting point is 00:59:09 kind of sparse, but they're there. So I'm on stage, and the, sorry, before I go on stage, the booker was like, all right,
Starting point is 00:59:16 so I'm going to give you guys cash at the end of the show. I'm like, okay, whatever. And he seemed kind of shady. I don't know, just to get that vibe,
Starting point is 00:59:23 you know. Yeah. And I'm on stage, and as I'm telling jokes, he comes up of shady. I don't know. Just need to get that vibe, you know? Yeah. And I'm on stage. And as I'm telling jokes, he comes up to the stage and he goes, he goes, hold on a sec. I'm putting the bucket right here. All right. Just put it.
Starting point is 00:59:33 If you want to help out with the pay for the show, put it in here while I'm on stage. And I go, what? Like I had to like, it was a mid joke. Yeah. And I was like, oh my God, none of it was flying. Right. So then I put the middle on and he's doing his thing and i'm backstage and then uh he's i see the the the booker guy reading a note and i was like are you going uh are you doing time and he goes what no
Starting point is 01:00:02 no and then i later found out it's because he thought i meant jail time and it was it was a note from his buddy in jail oh oh weird so weird so he disappears and i go on stage and i'm about to introduce johnny and he goes no no no no no no no no no he walks down hold on hold on hold on hold on i go oh okay, I guess the booker, whatever his name is, James, whatever, wants to talk to you guys. And I thought, and I didn't clue into that it was a note from jail. I thought maybe it was a speech or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So then he goes on stage with a guitar.
Starting point is 01:00:39 And then he goes, we all know what happened to Jason. And it's a shame you couldn't be here tonight. So I wrote this for him. 10-minute power ballad about his buddy dying. Oh, not even his buddy from prison. Oh, my God. Oh, wow. And then, all right, Johnny Garthouse.
Starting point is 01:01:04 Follow that. And then Johnny went up and then he just did his thing. They paid us in cash. And a lot of it, some, there was some change involved. Oh yeah, yeah. Because it's from the bucket. And we were in the car counting and he'd say, hang out with us. You were great, hang out.
Starting point is 01:01:21 Which is, if anyone listening is like, that is the last thing you do at a comedy show in a place you don't want to be anywhere like you know hang on be part of us you're afraid you're gonna walk
Starting point is 01:01:32 out of there like oh man with a weird tattoo the worst is when the person you're with is like yeah let's do it that is the worst
Starting point is 01:01:38 yeah cause then you're like oh my god come on man I think she's digging me yeah get all these quarters.
Starting point is 01:01:47 So we count the cash and we leave. That was by far like a 10-minute power ballot on his dead buddy. Oh, wow. Oh, boy. Yeah. It's pretty. And everybody in the bar knows that dude. Everyone.
Starting point is 01:01:57 Yeah. It's like the local thing. And maybe the guy in prison killed him. Maybe. Oh, wow. It was like a note. Yeah. It's like, I'll do it. i'll do it i'll do it again
Starting point is 01:02:05 as soon as i get it i'll kill you're next oh my god oh man it was the worst and then i was doing a show yuck yucks comedy club in toronto yeah and he came up to me the booker guy what he came with his hey hey eddie i go hey remember did the show with me And you said the town I was like Oh yeah Yeah We gotta have you back You're like
Starting point is 01:02:30 I don't do comedy anymore Sure yeah You just did a set This is the last one Yeah this is the last set Yeah I'm going to prison tomorrow Yeah I'll write you
Starting point is 01:02:38 Oh my god Do we want to move on to overheard? Yeah Hey this is Pop Rocket We're your source for all pop culture information It's an intellectual and incredibly snark filled Do we want to move on to overheard? Yeah. Hey, this is Pop Rocket. We're your source for all pop culture information. It's an intellectual and incredibly snark-filled discussion about pop culture by five Frankie Hollywood 30-somethings. No name calling, no rudeness, just straight talk and a lot of role play.
Starting point is 01:02:57 I'm only 30-something for another year. Me too. And I don't tell anybody I'm 30-something. Pop Rocket comes out every week from MaximumFun.org. Hello, I'm Taco, the elephant magician. Merle Highchurch here, the master of clerical magic. I'm Magnus Burnside, the fighter. Did you guys like that?
Starting point is 01:03:16 Did you, the listener, like that? You were just swept up in a world of high fantasy and magic where anything can happen and anything is possible. Hi, I'm Griffin McElroy, Dungeon Master for the Adventure Zone, a new podcast on Maximum Fun, in which magic and mystery intertwine for a very erotically charged role-playing experience.
Starting point is 01:03:34 You can catch it every other Thursday here on MaximumFun.org or iTunes. It's for Dungeons & Dragons, but with family. Overheard. Overheard Overheard It's a segment in which we Overhear wonderful things out there in the world And we report them back here on the podcast Now we always like to start with the guests
Starting point is 01:03:55 Okay And you brought something You said you got something I did it at Havana Yeah, and it's very funny So So basically the story is I went to go watch Transformers.
Starting point is 01:04:08 Like the most recent one? Yeah. Oh, the Age of Ultron. And I was with a friend, and there was a guy behind me by himself, just eating popcorn by himself, didn't say a word about the whole thing. And there was a scene where like, I think Optimus Prime turns into a truck mid-air or something,
Starting point is 01:04:30 and all I hear is the guy behind me go, yeah, right. And I thought like, really? That's what lost you? These intergalactic robots fighting for the safety of Earth? And you're like, no, I didn't believe that part. No, he's sitting there
Starting point is 01:04:46 biting his tongue the whole time. You know, there's been four of these things. All right. I thought this was based on a true story.
Starting point is 01:04:55 I'm an electrician. I thought they were about those things, Transformers. But like, he's there by himself. Yeah. Everyone there
Starting point is 01:05:03 should be there by themselves. Or maybe with a kid Sure Right He should have a kid in tow It was just funny that like Because if he's with somebody Maybe he would do it just to joke around with
Starting point is 01:05:14 Right You know like Yeah right Stop it Yeah Yeah And we're like Nice boots
Starting point is 01:05:21 Or maybe someone says Yeah nice boots after his prep Or maybe someone says, nice boots after his prime. Or maybe someone said to him, like, can you believe that thing's doing this? Yeah. Right. Like maybe it was unrelated. Right.
Starting point is 01:05:31 But for him to be by himself and glued to the screen, then it was obviously about Optimus Prime switching to a car in the middle. Oh, I love it. Especially like, he's got a mouthful of popcorn. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:05:42 Right. Do you see him walking out? And you turn around and it's like, Malcolm Gladwell. There's no way he could have done that without 10,000 hours. One of the greatest thinkers of our time. No way. Optimist lame. Epic fail.
Starting point is 01:06:03 Do you, Dave? Do I, Dave? Do you, Dave? Do you you Dave? do I Dave? do you Dave? so I was in Toronto a week or two ago and in my hotel room I just had the television on and it was
Starting point is 01:06:20 morning and it was breakfast television and they were interviewing the star of the new Cinderella movie. Okay. Live action. Yeah. And this was funny to me the thing I overheard because it's something that I say
Starting point is 01:06:36 all the time just to be an asshole. But the host of the show said it for real and they were talking about the plot of the movie and how it's different from the show said it for real. And they were talking about the plot of the movie and how it's different from the cartoon and it kind of focuses on different things. And the star was like, yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:53 And our version, Cinderella has a lot of inner strength. And the host said, and that's so important today with social media. Yes. You know that a producer like said to him that morning, like, you're really going to, you got to mention social media out there,
Starting point is 01:07:14 man. We get killed. Get killed. Oh, and that's truer today than ever on account of Twitter and the blogosphere. A blogosphere. You know, they're remaking or they're doing a live version of Dumbo, right? Are they really?
Starting point is 01:07:30 Yeah. And Mulan. Yeah, and Mulan. Together. Who will win? Who will be the last person or elephant standing? We did, a few months ago, We were talking about Pinocchio And how we didn't know the plot of Pinocchio
Starting point is 01:07:47 We knew various things But then we filled it in I couldn't tell you the plot of Dumbo There's an elephant, a child elephant Has ears that are too big And can fly Is this something to do with being an outcast and bullied? Well yeah, and he gets separated
Starting point is 01:08:02 From his mother Does he get cyber bullied no but it's very important now uh but here's the like uh they really should remake dumbo because it's a great story except that in the original there's these two horribly racist characters are they crows oh yeah like yeah the minstrel crows yeah yeah yeah so it that needs to be a movie that like kids don't watch anymore but like they make a good version of it so what would you do instead of the crows i just would i just delete that scene what are the role of what is the role of the crows are they like they were kind of they were they were mean and uh uh i don't
Starting point is 01:08:42 think they were allies they're not but they're not like the narrator or no no think they were allies. They were sassy kind of like. But they're not like the narrator or. No, no. They were, I think they were characters inserted in there to, so everybody could enjoy some racism. Yeah. Of the day, you know. But yeah, so I don't know. I feel like Disney's got a lot of those kind of things that it's like, yeah, go ahead and remake that. And then put the other thing in the vault and never let it out again.
Starting point is 01:09:07 Sure. Anyways. What are the most racist characters? In Disney movies. But I haven't seen, I've seen like four. And I don't remember much racism in The Great Mouse Detective. Well, I think in one of the... Are the Siamese cats racist?
Starting point is 01:09:24 They're pretty racist. Yeah, I think in one of the... Are the Siamese cats racist? They're pretty racist. Yeah, they're racist. Yeah, and then I feel like everybody in the Jungle Book speaks with kind of an English accent, except the orangutan, and he's like a jazz guy. He's like singing jazz songs. Do you know what I mean? It's just like... I like the way everyone who explains jazz has to snap both
Starting point is 01:09:47 fingers well yeah because that's uh that's how we understand it's the international sign for jazz yeah it's snapping your everyone people used to think jar jar binks was like racist he was wasn't yeah i still think that misa do think that i felt like it didn't sound as caribbean as i was like because i grew up in a very predominantly car that. I felt like it didn't sound as Caribbean. Because I grew up in a very predominantly Caribbean neighborhood. I was like, it didn't sound that Caribbean. But did it sound a little Caribbean? It did sound a little Caribbean. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:15 It didn't sound so much Caribbean as Caribbean. I mean. There was also, weren't there aliens that were like, basically like Chinese? Yeah. And they were the bad guys? Right, right, right. So it was like george lucas just stop like you haven't you mean he did yeah that's right he left indiana jones alone and uh everything was fine oh that last indiana jones movie i didn't see it no you
Starting point is 01:10:39 should you're all about me wasting my time You should You should do that Yeah It's How long is it? It's about Six entourages long I only measure things In entourages
Starting point is 01:10:53 I had sex with this woman For about an eighth Of an entourage An eighth? Oh wow Good for you Yeah Was it the finale?
Starting point is 01:11:02 No It was like Just an episode Yeah A very special episode, a crossover. No, no, no. Just a regular one where Turtle got a fancy pair of shoes. Oh, yeah, when he waited in line all day.
Starting point is 01:11:14 That one where Turtle assigned Saigon. Saigon. I love that these are exact plot lines. Yeah. My overheard comes courtesy of Pent penticton where during the day i love this you went on a wine tour i went i know our hotel was right next to a bowl-a-rama that was open so i went bowling i went 10 pin bowling for like hours and uh it was like some guy who just came out of the mountains and just a bowl and
Starting point is 01:11:45 it goes back to the mountains yeah like i came in and i was just wearing earbuds like the whole time like it's i just it was like four games and then i would come back and be like four more games this guy means business and did kevin go no it was me by myself was he invited yeah i invited him he's like now i'm gonna have a nap. I was like, you're lost. You can have a nap anywhere. Yeah, exactly. We've got a pool of yellies right here. And it was all kids' birthday parties everywhere.
Starting point is 01:12:13 There's all these kids having their birthday parties. And then the loner, long-bearded loner. The loner asking for 18 games. Yeah, where's my parade? I keep yelling at the kids. I'll be bowling for 600 rajas. Do you mind if I go barefoot? I keep yelling at the kids. I was like, I'll be bowling for 600 Rajas. Do you mind if I go barefoot? I want to feel
Starting point is 01:12:28 the flow. Imagine you barefoot bowling with one hand. Now, every time I go bowling, it's usually, oh,
Starting point is 01:12:40 two years since I last bowled. Right. Yeah. And I always think, maybe I'll be good at bowling this time and I always get one strike
Starting point is 01:12:50 and then the rest I'm terrible at yeah that was pretty much my and when I went back for my second set of games the lady was like are you getting better? are you beating your old score? and I was like no it's steadily getting worse like I started your old score? And I was like, no, it's steadily getting worse.
Starting point is 01:13:06 Like I started somewhere and then every game I was like, why am I not learning from my mistakes at all? Also, why, like it's 2015. Why bowling? We're being constantly monitored by the government. Why can't the lady who hands out shoes know your score already? Why does she have to ask you if you're getting better? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:13:25 Why can't she see? Oh, he's not getting better. He's not getting better. I just don't think they care. I think that was it. Just making conversation. Yeah. I did a show on a bowling alley once.
Starting point is 01:13:35 Have you done a show on a bowling alley? Yeah, yeah. In Kamloops. And it was great. Was it good? Yeah, it was fantastic. Because after the show, free bowling. All the bowling you can do. Oh my God. That sounds great. Yeah, it was amazing. Because after the show, free bowling. All the bowling you can do.
Starting point is 01:13:45 Oh, my God. That sounds great. Yeah, it was amazing. See? Because small towns, I'm not against them. I'm going broke doing all this bowling. So one of the times I'm going to re-up on my alley, there's a dad there. I was surmising, but maybe I was wrong, but I think it was a weekend dad taking his kid out like,
Starting point is 01:14:07 oh, we're going to bowl. And then, uh, right. See one of those horses that's running through town. This will make this kid forget about that bounce birthday check. It's been in some nice,
Starting point is 01:14:22 um, he, uh, they're at the counter and they're getting their shoes and then it's a very old lady that's uh working the counter and she goes i can put your name in the computer for you and uh he goes okay i'm i'll be dad and she's like okay dad and then uh she's like, and what's his name? And he says, it's Zayden. And then she goes, uh. She just doesn't even ask.
Starting point is 01:14:52 She just goes, uh. And the guy's like, Z-A-I-E, whatever crazy thing. And she goes, how about son? Dad and son. Dad and son. Dad and son. Yeah. Oh, Zayden. How about son?
Starting point is 01:15:12 Oh, boy. I guess we ran out of Jadens, Adens, Cadens, Ninja Guidens. Yeah. It's one of the reasons me and his mother broke up. One of the reasons me and his mother broke up. Now, in addition to our overheards, we have overheards that have been sent in by listeners. If you want to send one in to us, you can send it in to spy at maximumfun.org. And the first overheard, it comes from Steven P. in Atlanta. Comes from Steven P. in Atlanta.
Starting point is 01:15:45 Hmm. This is at a workplace that there's been some renovations going on. An email was sent around explaining what's going to be affected. My co-worker's first language is not English. And he was reading the email out loud. Here's what I overheard. The break room will be closed until november 11th the fridge and microwave will be moved to room x but you will not be able to use that coffee machine you'll have to use the different coffee machine in the interim then he paused steve where's the interim ah Ah, adorable, right?
Starting point is 01:16:29 These are the misunderstandings. Yeah, this is a very, it's a fun cultural. Exchange? Exchange, yeah. You can put that in the margins of like the chicken soup for the immigrant soul. Immigrant soul. Immigrant soul. Immigrant soul. This next one comes from Amber D.
Starting point is 01:16:50 Parts unknown. Where's, no. Oh, she was in the mountains of North Carolina. Oh, wow. You guys got a great scape on the. Oh, yeah. That's great. Yeah, you get around. And overheard the following.
Starting point is 01:17:02 On my way to the mail room. And in the, this is on the way to the mailroom and in the mailroom today, there were two guys. Oh, no, there were so, wait, there's two of them. There's a mailroom in the mountains of North Dakota? Yeah. North, sorry, Carolina? Yeah, she works at a lovely, crunchy, shoeless college in the mountains of North Carolina. Oh, wow. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:17:28 And so this is a woman and a man. The woman says, this song reminds me of protests and, like, kids getting shot. The man says, really? It reminds me of Coors Light. Oh, my God. What? I wonder what the song was. What was the one
Starting point is 01:17:47 I mean the protest of people getting shot. They're getting shot with silver bullets. Stop now. What's that sound? Everybody looks like or Ohio by Crosby, Stills and Nett. Does that one make you feel like Coors Light?
Starting point is 01:18:04 No. Neither of them are Coors Light? No. Ohio? No. Neither of them are Coors Light-y. Hmm. Well, that one, the first one kind of is. Well, Coors Light is the banquet beer. Coors Light, I would associate with music from whatever Smokey and the Bandit.
Starting point is 01:18:21 Oh, yeah. Eastbound and Down, that kind of um uh this last one comes from tara d tara dactyl yeah tara dactyl i didn't want to say that probably is a real name out there tara and then dactyl why not zayden dactyl son dactyl uh this is an overheard from the Maryland Renaissance Festival. Woo! Yeah. Wow.
Starting point is 01:18:48 I was in the maze, and two little girls, about three and four, were coming towards me from a dead end. The older one said to the younger, don't worry, we'll find our way out using big sister power. Oh, right! What is she, like a kid's book? Yeah, isn't that sweet? Big sister power. Big sister power. Oh, right. What is she, like a kid's book? Yeah, isn't that sweet? Big sister power. Big sister power. I don't think they ever found their way out.
Starting point is 01:19:12 No, well, you know, that's the thing is when you say big brother, everybody goes, no. When you say big sister. Yeah. Yeah, it feels good. Like, yeah, go out there and learn how to swim. Have you ever been lost in a big maze? Like a corn maze or a hedge maze? No I mean, you're of the hedge
Starting point is 01:19:28 I am of the hedge Yeah How did you know that? Oh yeah, from the podcast Yeah, you're Eddie of the hedge Eddie of the hedge Yeah My dad was, my grandfather was an orphan
Starting point is 01:19:39 Abandoned on a hedge Wow Yeah And that's really where the name comes from Yeah, so So are you the only So if you see Della Seppi If you see anyone with that last name on a, on a hedge. Wow. Yeah. And that's really where the name comes from. Yeah. So. So are you the only. So if you see.
Starting point is 01:19:48 Delis Epi. If you see anyone with that last name, it came from that baby, my grandfather. For sure. Really? Yeah. I believe so. That's amazing. So that means you're, yeah, you're connected to all the.
Starting point is 01:19:59 So basically the. All the hedges of the world. All the hedges of the world. So my grandfather was an orphan, left at a church. He stayed there till he was 15 went to like a home like he worked like in the field for the some family and then joined the military which is prime for military in what country is this in italy this is and then my uh he didn't have a last name and the government needed for him to have a last name and they asked the church and they said we found him on the hedge so della means from and sepi
Starting point is 01:20:23 means hedge wow yeah yeah that's great but the question is have you been lost in a maze no no yeah there's uh there used to be one in uh calgary at the amusement park calloway park yeah yeah and then you just yeah you just you just yell and or you just follow somebody who looks like they know what they're doing i remember at the at the um uh fair here there was the thing that was like kind of like a fun house yeah and it but it was like passageways and some were glass and you would just like there's some mirrored too somewhere mirrors somewhere glass and you would just like bonk your face right into glass oh that's not you know you look down there's like remnants of chipped teeth. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:21:07 I remember my brother laughing so hard at me. Like, where was the big brother power? Did you see skulls and stuff? And this one, you just see chipped teeth. But that's the difference between big sister power and big brother power. Big brother power just will dunk your face in the toilet. Yeah, exactly. Now, in addition to overheards that are written in, we also accept your phone calls.
Starting point is 01:21:32 If you would like to call us, our phone number is 206-339-8328, like these people have. Hi, this is Amanda from San Antonio, Texas. I have an overheard. I was just at an aquarium with a friend, and they had one of those big stingray exhibits where you can pet the stingrays. And a nine-year-old was talking to like a six-year-old brother and he said very meritoriously you know this is what killed Steve Urkel
Starting point is 01:21:53 oh my god that's so funny and he never got together with Laura. Never got a chance. But Stefan Arkell is still alive. Oh yeah, right? And Robo-Arkel. Robo-Arkel.
Starting point is 01:22:15 Although he got electrocuted in the tank. God, that is so funny. I've never been to one of those. A pet, a stingray. No, me neither Have you seen those photos on the internet Of a zoo in Japan I want to say
Starting point is 01:22:31 Where there's a one way thing that an otter Can stick its hand through and you can touch Like it can grab your finger But it can't go the other way You can't go in and grab an otter And shake it up An otter glory hole Kind of, yeah you can put a wood
Starting point is 01:22:47 clam through there yeah yeah so anyways it's like a big attraction and there's yeah i don't think i've ever been to a petting zoo let alone that yeah they're uh they're great yeah you like uh dander no i love dander yeah you like having dander I love having histamines rush through my sinuses If you like If your favorite type of food is pellets Then they got them But you fit them to goats I love the hint of bark and poo
Starting point is 01:23:20 If you want to see the bridge of saliva Between your hand and a goat's mouth, a petting zoo is the place for you. Here's your next phone call. R.I.P. Steve Urkel. Hello, Dave and Graham and possible probable guest. It's your old friend Ivan Decker calling in at overseen. In Vancouver, they have a new initiative where
Starting point is 01:23:45 they want people to design their own toonies and the ad is like a blank toonie with the bear outside of it. And I've seen five or six of these ads walking around today. I'll just pause it right now. Yeah. Well you're laughing. What do you think
Starting point is 01:24:01 people are drawing? A bear pooing everywhere. That's what I'm picturing? A bear pooing everywhere. That's what I'm picturing. A penis of some sort. Every single one, picture of a dick. Pretty great. Because I thought the bear was outside, they'd draw it
Starting point is 01:24:16 and the stink line's coming off its butt. No. Yeah, I saw one that was a nickel. Draw your own. I bet you're not to draw them on the poster Not on a canvas for you Yeah try and tell that to the people already I was like of course
Starting point is 01:24:34 That's what's getting for free Can I add a quick Overseen The Scientology building in Toronto It's boarded up It's not there anymore on Yonge Street And I walk by and it's's boarded up it's not there anymore on young street and i walked by and it's all boarded up and someone spray painted does tom know which i thought was so funny you
Starting point is 01:24:52 know you know yeah he's he's up top is what is there the the higher power is it xenu xenu is not the higher power xenu is the uh evil overlord is the evil overlord who dropped all the souls onto our planet TGAC. So is Xenu like their Satan? I guess. Type of thing? Okay. He really goofed the floof. That's in the book, too.
Starting point is 01:25:19 Yeah. Here is the final overheard of 2015. Hi, Stop Podcasting Yourself. This is Jessica in New York, and I have an overheard from the hair salon a few weeks ago. I was sitting there when a really talkative lady came in, and she was telling her hairstylist about a great date she'd been on the weekend before. He was apparently a multimillionaire who owned a beach club in New Jersey.
Starting point is 01:25:43 But the best part was when she said, he's really smart. And he thinks I'm really smart, which is great. I'm going to keep it that way. Very smugly. So that's my overheard. I'm going to hide all my For Dummies books. How would you hide being dumb? Graham, you first.
Starting point is 01:26:03 I would hold all menus right side up oh how do you know i don't know you know i know i would pay attention to what other diners are doing and i'd be like this is the right way yeah and also i would say chaucer a lot oh my god just throw it into conversation very any uh yes or no question I would just answer with quite. Eddie, any tips on not appearing dumb? That reminds me when I was in Harvard
Starting point is 01:26:31 and then just talk about what the order at Burger King or something. I went to school a little outside of Boston. Boston Community College. Yeah. I went to school A little outside
Starting point is 01:26:48 Trenton So That brings us To the end of the show Yeah Now Eddie You've got Different things to plug
Starting point is 01:26:58 Yeah Yeah You've got your own podcast My own podcast Called Barely Friending It just started What's Tell us the premise
Starting point is 01:27:04 The premise is Basically me And my friend MJ riggins who is a comedian from uh los angeles and she's a comedian actress and uh we have this sort of frenemy sort of relationship where we hate each other but we also friends sure and we talk about trending topics in uh in uh among people who are either relationships or like friends or acquaintances whatever so like we'll ask our audience what's uh your best vacation with a friend or worst way you've been broken up and then people send in stuff send in stuff and we'll tell us we'll tell our own anecdotes and comment on people stories as well that sounds like a lot of fun yeah so like we had one person send a story like worst surprise ever got was was like someone bought a birthday card for this person.
Starting point is 01:27:47 And they went to read it. Inside there was a little baggie. And there was hair in it. And they're like, what's that? It's my pubes. And that was the worst gift he's ever gotten. That is pretty terrible. Hard to top.
Starting point is 01:27:58 So like stuff like we get like a lot of cool stories in. So it's just started. So pretty proud of that. Can you get it on iTunes? We just started on SoundCloud. We're you get it on uh itunes uh we just started uh on soundcloud we're getting rs feed soon and then we only have like two episodes okay all right so find where can people find it where uh on soundcloud right now and it's called uh barely friending so they type that in soundcloud yeah that's it this is all i'm so yeah you put
Starting point is 01:28:20 you put the letters in the right order. You spell the word I said. Graham, why didn't we come up with a concept when we started the show? Because back in the olden days, you didn't need a concept. You just talked it out. Podcasting was just enough on its own. It was pre-concept. Yeah, it's like, you know how Larry King never did research or anything? He was just like, I'll just go and talk for an hour.
Starting point is 01:28:47 And he just was allowed to do that through his whole career. Charlie Rose didn't even want a background. Just give me a table and a man. Yeah, it's just a black. Yeah, give me a table and infinity behind me. Yeah. I want it to be like it's happening inside this person's mind. And the new album oh yeah so my last
Starting point is 01:29:07 album is called you've changed you can find that on itunes and uh bandcamp um and my new album i'm recording uh so i guess when this comes out i've already been recorded but at the yuck yucks comedy club in vancouver and it's called i think i've changed so ah nice so uh it's my second one it's all stuff that i wrote in la and like you know know, it's all my old, like I kind of scrapped all my old road stuff that I used to do. Yeah. So, it's all my new stuff. Oh, cool.
Starting point is 01:29:31 Yeah. Very cool. And do you've got a website? Yeah. You can find me on eddidelseppi.com or Twitter at eddidelseppi or Instagram as well. And just spell Del Seppi. D-E-L-L-A-S-I-E-P. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:29:46 Yeah. Thank you so much for being our guest. Guys, I had a blast. It was awesome. Oh, it was fun to have you here, man. And knock him dead
Starting point is 01:29:54 on the taping. Thanks, man. Yeah. I will. And if you like the show, you should head over to MaximumFun.org. Check out the blog recap.
Starting point is 01:30:02 Yeah, stuff we, pictures and videos of things we've talked about in the show. Surely a picture out the blog recap. Yeah. Stuff. We pictures and videos of things we've talked about in the show. Uh, surely a picture of the Scientology building for sure. Maybe entourage. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:30:13 Yeah, absolutely. Also coming up on May Niner, May 9th, uh, live podcast. Yes. May 9th at the,
Starting point is 01:30:23 uh, Rio theater Here in Vancouver It's a fundraiser for our friend Pat Yeah, and it's a great Check out this lineup It's us doing the live podcast With Charlie Demers Alicia Tobin
Starting point is 01:30:37 And opening act for the show The Sunday Service None of these acts are guaranteed They're all signed on At the time of this recording for the show, the Sunday service. None of these acts are guaranteed. So, all signed on. They're all signed on. At the time of this recording,
Starting point is 01:30:50 we do not have a link for the tickets, but they should be for sale by now. It'll be at riotheatertickets.ca, but I don't know when they'll be up. Okay.
Starting point is 01:30:58 I don't know when they'll be available. But we'll have a link in the podcast recap. Yeah. And, you know, live podcast, man. It in the, the podcast recap. Yeah. And, you know,
Starting point is 01:31:07 live podcast, man, it's the most fun you can have sitting up. Right. I guess you can also have sex standing up. Uh, I don't know. There's, there's all sorts of new moves.
Starting point is 01:31:17 But not both of you. Nah, there's all sorts of new moves since the last time I did it. Sure. Yeah. With this free hammock. Um, since the last time I did it. Sure, yeah. With this free hammock. And if you like this show, please do tell your friends
Starting point is 01:31:31 and come on back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself. MaximumFun.org Comedy and culture. Artist owned. Listener supported.

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