Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 517
Episode Date: February 12, 2018No guest this week as we explore the worlds of trading cards, Oscar bait, and municipal politics....
Transcript
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Hi, he's Dave Shumka.
And he's Graham Clark.
And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself.
Woo!
Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 517 of Stop Podcasting Yourself.
My name's Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who's a sex bomb, a sex bomb, and baby, you can turn him on.
Or he can turn you on. It's, you know what, it's your choice. Mr. Dave, show me.
That's the Tom Jones song?
That is correct.
Um, sex bomb, sex bomb, he can turn you turn you on yeah that's not quite a rhyme yeah and it's
also not really what a bomb does sure you don't really turn on a bomb yeah a bomb goes off yeah
yeah yeah it explodes yeah it's sex there's like a sexual euphemism about exploding I just can't get there. I'm coming up empty.
Hi.
Hi.
I am a sex bomb.
Yeah.
It happens to men when they get to my age.
You have to use a sex bomb.
Oh, boy, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Some kind of...
Topical sex bomb?
Yeah, some kind of
engorging salve.
Where do you get...
Do you just pick up the generic version?
Or do you...
Well, yeah.
Because Diamond Heart has been on the market for so long that they have a...
They now make a generic, you know, life brand version.
OTC.
I use Mr. Zog's sex weapons.
Oh, shit. Yeah. Life brand version, OTC. I use Mr. Zog Sex West.
Oh, shit.
I use Dr. Skipper, which is one of the off-brand Dr. Peppers.
We should say before we get the podcast rolling that we are going to be doing a live podcast as part of JFL Northwest at the Cobalt. No.
No, not the Cobalt. At Biltmore.
Biltmore Cabaret here in Vancouver.
That'll be on March 8th. Tickets
should maybe still be on
sale. Yeah, yeah. It's a hot ticket.
I don't know if it is
or not. We're now
recording this at the time when we've
announced it so yeah
so we'll see it might be it might be sold out now yeah in which case um well we're not gonna go out
and take take this gold out we're not gonna go back and edit this part out no no no so if it's
already sold out you know what scalpers yeah or skypers skypers uh can Skype into the show. Or, you know, what was it?
Ticket StubHub?
Yeah, Ticket Hut.
Ticket Hut.
StubHub.
StubHub.
Sure.
If only there was like another word for ticket.
Yeah.
Slip.
Oh, yeah.
Slip.
Pass.
Pass.
Should we get to know us?
Let's do it.
Get to know us.
No guests today.
No guests today?
No.
Every, you know what?
There was a time in our lives when we said, every 10 episodes, let's have no guests.
And we've never, we've maybe stuck to that for half a year.
Yeah, yeah. Because there's always, there's always some person around. There's always a reason. Yeah. let's have no guest and we've never we've maybe stuck to that for half a year yeah yeah because
there's always there's always some person around there's always a reason yeah yeah there's always
a reason for some oh you know what we this could be the episode with no guests but uh some big
shot is in town yeah yeah yeah uh frankie sharp from, sure. Crucial Taunt is good. We could get the lead singer of Crucial Taunt on.
I think I've said this before, but when I was a kid and I saw that movie,
I thought that Crucial Taunt was a real band,
and I thought that she was the real, like, when the.
If you don't know what we're talking about, it's Wayne's World.
Yes.
The Tia Carrera's band is called Crucial Taunt.
And I remember, like, going to the. Which I always is called Crucial Taunt. And I remember like going to the.
Which I always thought was Crucial Todd for years.
Who are the Crucial Todds?
It's just Crucial Todd.
Oh, just one.
One guy.
But in our society, who are the Crucial Todds?
Oh, who are the Crucial Todds to what we need?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh boy.
Big Head Todd from Big Head Todd of the Monsters.
Yeah.
I mean, I would say, you know, like a Todd Berry, a Todd Glass. Oh, sure. Big Head Todd from Big Head Todd of the Monsters. Yeah. I mean, I would say, you know, like a Todd Berry, a Todd Glass.
Oh, sure.
You know, your funny Todd.
Your funny Todd.
Todd Stottlemyre from the Toronto Blue Jays in the early 90s.
Raw Todd from Todd Flanders.
Yeah, sure.
And that's all.
That's it.
I think that's all the Todd's.
I think it's safe to wrap it up now.
It's funny because
You thought it was
A real band
Oh you want to
Talk about Todd's
Yeah well
It's
Are people naming
Their kids Todd now
You are amongst
Youngsters
Have you encountered
A young Todd
Amongst youngsters
Um
I'm not
I've not heard any
Todd's these days
A lot of old timey
Like
There's been
A trend of old timey names
for for girls right uh what's the one there was one the other day that came iris and ruby and pearl
pearl yeah um uh the but there have been there are a lot of boys that are like hairy and
uh you know ah you were talking about a car alarm that keeps going
off it's going off again you can't hear it no uh harry and uh dean and stanton and things like that
these are the old timey names that demanded to come back uh but yeah no there's uh no todds i
always i always think it's funny that my doctor's name is Brad.
And he's the world's oldest Brad.
And he's like 60, maybe 70 now.
No, probably in his 60s.
But when he was a kid, he was probably Bradley.
Or Bradford.
Or Bradford, yeah.
But there's no, Todd is just Todd, right?
Toddly, Toddworth.
Toddworth, that's it.
Toddworth is a good butler name yeah yeah
please uh dispose of this body todworth you made on the rug
yeah yeah um but tia carrere speaking of crucial taunt and the thing her being
thinking that's a real band she's won i'm sure we've talked about this before, she's won many Grammy Awards.
Yes.
As for the Hawaiian Artist of the Year or Hawaiian Album of the Year.
She makes Hawaiian music.
Cool.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, because when I went, I went to like a music store and asked like, where could I get Crucial Taunt?
Oh boy, the guy at the
counter must have that must have just made his day yeah it's right next to the shitty beatles
but imagine uh yeah somebody coming in and asking for a band that's like a made up
oh man i just realized now what that guy was probably like oh brother getting the wayne's
world shirt yeah um do you have an oldies section i'm looking for marvin barry and the moonlighters
i was watching a clip of uh lighters what seems all right yeah that sounds, that sounds right. Don't write into us if it's wrong.
The guy who played Goldie Wilson, he still goes to... Conventions?
Conventions, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
You saw the Back to the Future documentary on Netflix?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And he's in that, like him and the original Jennifer are...
But he seems really into it.
Like, he doesn't seem like.
Oh, and didn't he, like, officiate a wedding?
That sounds about right.
Me!
But he doesn't, like, I think he's a guy that he's like, I don't want to say the line.
Like, he'll say the line.
He'll come with a poster and he'll say the line.
Me!
Is that his only line yeah that's
yeah basically yeah i like the sound of that and uh and then he becomes mayor and then you never
see him again you only see him on posters sure yeah you never see a goldie wilson again but uh
oh to have one role where it was probably only a day of filming. And it's the rest of his life.
I was talking to a past guest, Paul Anthony,
and he was talking about,
I think he was going to go to some convention
because he's on Flash or...
Yeah, he's on the Flash.
Or the Arrow as the Rainbow Marauder.
Rainbow, I don't know.
Yeah.
And he said he went to one that was
like you we'll give you an extra you know x amount of dollars if you want to go in the vip
room for an hour he's like sure give me tell me all the extras i can do yeah yeah
and so he went in the vip room and two people came in in the hour and that's the worst oh yeah you want uh you want 100 people
and maybe and so they don't feel the need to talk to you
like if it's two people they'll be like are you yeah where do i know you yeah and 100 people the
odds are you might know a small character from flash yes you might find one and so he said he had to like a guy was like
can you call my wife and so he had to call this guy's wife and like we're hanging out together
because i'm cheating but i need you to call my wife but he he had to call in and explain to him
like hi it's it's paul anthony i play the rainbow raider uh do you remember the episode
no the rainbow rate like he had to explain who the character was I play the Rainbow Raider Do you remember the episode No the Rainbow Raider
He had to explain who the character was
Yeah the
I mean that would be the worst
If you showed up and nobody knew who you were
That's how I feel at every podcast thing I've ever gone to
You guys look like you just want to meet a McElroy
And you know We could a McElroy.
And, you know, we could be McElroys.
It's all an audio.
We just look like we're there to also meet a McElroy.
Yeah.
I've never been.
No, that's not true.
I went to a card trading show when I was a kid And there were people there
I think old athletes
But there was an old wrestler
And I only knew he was a wrestler
Because he had a bunch of posters up
And I was really fascinated with him
Because I'd never heard of him before
And I got him to sign a card
But not one of his cards
Sure like a birthday card.
But as a kid, it didn't seem sad to me.
I think he was smart at bringing posters
because you don't want people looking at you wondering if they know you.
Right.
Yeah, he had a booth set up and he had a belt and stuff.
There was no question that this guy was like some sort of eating a turnbuckle out of a
bowl with a spoon.
He's pouring milk on the turnbuckle, really softening it up.
Um, but I think he was like maybe a stamp stampede wrestler, you know, like a Calgary
boy.
But, uh, yeah, yeah, I don't know.
If I ever had the luxury of being invited to something like that, I think I'd go.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, I think so.
You know.
I know people who go, and it's kind of an honor, even if you're not the star of the show.
Yeah. Like, just to be nominated but just to go and like you're paid
well and yeah and they're usually like you know they'll fly you there yeah and uh you're paid
well you're treated well you're yeah and all you have to do is like the only thing is is if you were on a show that had like a very dense you know history
and stuff like if you had to answer questions about the lore of the show yeah and you you
like worked there four days yeah yeah yeah like what's his relation to this character and you're
like i don't we never shot scenes together now the comic book, your character actually has brown eyes.
But why didn't you go with a brown contact lens?
Yeah, well, I wanted to create my own version of the character.
Yeah, but still, brown eyes would have been nicer.
That's what we're used to.
Yeah, have you ever been to a convention?
Any kind of collector convention convention i went to card
conventions as a kid did you were you serious about that as a kid like did you keep them in
sleeves and yeah um yeah but it was like 19 late 80s or early 90s was the you know kind of boom of
card collecting and there were like the honus wagner cards sold for you know, kind of boom of card collecting. And there were like the Honus Wagner cards sold for, you know, hundreds of thousands of dollars.
And so it was like.
Why did that card sell for so much?
Honus Wagner, I believe, back then before bubble gum was sold with cards.
Right.
The cards came with cigarettes.
Oh.
And he didn't want his card being sold with cards. Right. The cards came with cigarettes. Oh, and he didn't want,
and he didn't want his card being sold with cigarettes.
So there were a lot fewer of them.
Oh,
I see.
Okay.
So like,
I think they sold the first run and then he was like,
take me off these.
Right.
Which I,
that's what someone told me,
but I doubt,
like,
I doubt anyone would back then.
Like,
what are you going to do?
Sue me? Yeah. Yeah yeah yeah yeah like you're a
baseball player in 1908 yeah you're not famous like uh maybe they thought that he was gonna
come after him with a bat yeah you're famous but you're not like rich yeah the uh cars used to come
with cigarettes just like oh man uh was it just like cigarettes were cheaper than bubble gum?
Like that's how.
I'm not sure.
When was bubble gum invented?
That's a very good question.
That's one.
Don't know.
Yeah.
If this was a, you know, if this was like Pawn Stars, I'd have already.
Yeah.
I'd have my gum guy.
My friend Robert is a gum historian.
Yeah.
He runs the gum museum here in Las Vegas.
Yeah.
And this looks like something Mick Jagger would have chewed.
So I'm going to say, you know, you could get five, five, 10 grand for this.
So, um, yeah, so yeah, I did go and I, I was pretty serious about card collecting, but not, uh, nothing was like that pristine.
Like we found my dad's old, he had one set of old cards, uh, from the fifties and, but
it was missing the, the Gordie Howe card, which was the most expensive one from the
set, which would have completed the set and made the whole thing more expensive.
But we like, we never were, I don't think, too serious about, we've got to complete the set.
In fact, I sold one of the cards when I was a kid.
Like, when I went to that card convention, a guy was like, oh, you got a Tim Horton card?
And I didn't know who Tim Horton was because we didn't have that out here.
And so I sold it for, I think, two packs of Canadian Football League cards.
Two boxes of Canadian Football League cards.
Which was like worth, you know, 45 bucks.
Yeah, pretty good.
And then I got all like, think of how many Louis Pisaglia cards I got.
Yeah, you really had all sorts of pinball Clemens.
Yeah, Doug Flutie on the BC Lions.
Doug Flutie on the BC Lions.
Yeah, because I remember going with a friend who was very serious about card collecting.
And he had them all in, not just in sleeves, but in those little like plastic, like that had screws on them. Oh, I mean, if you had something that was like, when I went to the card shop in town, Bizarre Bizarre, they had like the Wayne Gretzky rookie card was in one of those.
Yeah.
It would have to be a real showpiece.
The piece that he had, like he also collected, like he collected sports cards and he collected comic book cards, which are worth nothing, I assume.
So he had like a Spider man in that case and i was like
even as a kid i was like that doesn't seem that's just a drawing of a thing like that's not a photo
of a guy who's dead now or whatever like that's just like anybody could draw that and anyways
uh but he was uh he hated that i was so dumb about cards. Oh, yeah.
And I bought, I think I had $10 on me,
and I bought a whole package of cards that were all Nolan Ryan cards.
It was just a set of Nolan Ryan cards, and they were worth nothing.
They weren't even worth the $10 that I spent.
That was a weird time in the early nineties when Nolan Ryan was like a 45 year old baseball player who's still like,
you know,
through 90 miles an hour and got a no hitter.
And yeah,
but I only knew him from cards.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I didn't know.
I never watched baseball or whatever,
but I knew him from headlines.
Like,
Oh,
this old guy got a no hitter
yeah and i just remember my friend saying like oh yeah if you could find a nolan ryan something or
other like second year card and so i was like yeah this guy sold a whole stack of them i'll
just buy all of them surely there will be something all right i'm going home i did it I won at cards Um Yeah the
The card shop that was near my house
Was owned by uh Tim Hunter
From the Calgary Flames
He had a card business
For a while
There used to be a
Tim Hunter was famously had a giant nose
Yeah
And that was the big cartoon on the
Window of the store
Cause there used to be this hockey cartoonist named Dave Elston.
He would do hockey and Canadian football cartoons.
Oh, I love it.
And I had his books.
I had books of his cartoons.
I think I know, I think I remember this.
And the car, the one for Tim Hunter was that he had, someone was mad that Tim Hunter had
taken all the like breathe right strips to
put on his nose were they like really dumpy looking yeah everyone was pear-shaped yeah
i remember boy i remember those i remember as a kid being like boy i don't i don't have the
knowledge to get any of these jokes no uh. Once in a while, something like that.
Like, oh, this guy's got a big nose.
Yeah, that's pretty fun.
That's an easy one for me to dive into.
I don't know the role of Dave Semenko's, what his role on the team is.
So a lot of these jokes are lost on me.
Whatever happened to your cards?
Did they just end up in the trash no they're still my like uh the binder of cards that i deemed binder worthy yeah is still at my
parents house and then i think there's just like a big box of loose cards that might be gone yeah
i think uh i think i have a box of loose cards i think the most i ever did with them was put an
elastic band around them which is probably bad for them yeah but they're not worth anything anyway no i had a full set of elf cards sure and that that's
the only thing that i ever like finished a set oh oh wow yeah and i was like yeah i had garbage
pail kids oh yeah yeah i think i really got out of card collecting when they, like, brands kind of caught on to that these are collectible.
So they started making everything like, you know, get the lucky card that has a hologram on it.
Yeah, oh yeah.
And then they started putting like players jersey, like little bits of players jerseys in the cards.
Oh really?
Like for a, you know, a rare one.
Oh wow wow like mixed
into the card no there would be like a little panel cut out that had a fabric on it yeah i just
like uh yeah i remember like i think my friend that was really serious about i think his dad
was also really into it so there was like i think they might've lost a lot of money.
My brother collected them before I did.
And so like there was a decade of cards before I got into it. Right.
That they were all,
uh,
and it was Canada from a card dynasty.
I came from a card dynasty and it was Canada.
So all the,
everything was written in English and French.
Oh yeah.
And so there would be a little,
you know,
blurb about the player in English.
And then the same one in French.
I learned a lot of my French from...
Not from the French school you went to?
No, not so much, but like...
These cards, they meant something.
Yeah, I know.
Oh, the French word for highlight is...
Yeah.
Anyways, I could talk about cards all the live the live and that's what we're here for
we're the card guys call in with and we'll evaluate your cards would you also would anyone
be interested in that yeah is that is that a show that people would listen is there is that a side
show that we could make us a couple bucks i wonder i wonder i guess there's there's definitely still
people that collect these cards that the um they play yeah magic yeah magic and stuff like that uh
and those are worth money somehow i think because they have value in the game yeah so like and like
there's only certain numbers of this kind, certain numbers of that kind or whatever.
Although I don't understand how people can forge money or counterfeit money, you know.
And like, why wouldn't you just counterfeit cards and then sell those for real money and then put that in towards your education?
And then put that towards Bitcoin, which is real money that is fake money.
towards your education.
Put that towards Bitcoin,
which is real money that is fake money.
Did I tell you
that I didn't rent an office
from a guy once
because he wanted to tell me
about Bitcoin?
Yeah, you did tell me that.
Like,
he had a flag
outside of his business
that had the Bitcoin symbol on it,
which I guess,
I don't know what that was about.
Why would you identify yourself as,
this is where bitcoins
are made we're a bitcoin this is a bitcoin family yeah we're a bitcoin friendly business on on the
back of my car i have a little stickman figures of me abby the kids the dog and two little bitcoins
and then yoda yeah and yoda um yeah i uh still still don't know how bitcoin works
2018 i i don't know how i don't know where it comes from apparently you can like code your
way to get more of it yeah i don't know where that how that works but i know how it like the
value goes up and down i get that yeah. Yeah. Like a currency. Yeah.
But I don't know.
Like if you had a Bitcoin, if you had like a Bitcoin.
If I had a million Bitcoin.
If I had a million Bitcoin, I'd be able to buy a country.
I'd be able to start a war of some sort.
It wouldn't be as quaint as having a million dollars.
Dijon ketchups.
I was, I'm gonna keep going.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, of course we need Kraft Dinner.
Just eat more of it.
Dave, what's going on
with you?
Well, I, so
I haven't, I
was really looking forward to
seeing Star Wars. Oh, yes.
And we never saw it over Christmas.
And then we came back and we got into the swing of things.
And Abby was like, you know what?
I'm going to go see Star Wars one night.
And you can go see it another night.
And we'll just like swap off with the kids.
Right.
They're not movie.
Margot Poppy certainly isn't.
Is Margo.
She's never been to a movie theater.
No,
but some,
some day soon.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Um,
it's all,
it's tricky.
The Wiggles movie.
Yeah.
It's tricky because some movies will just have a scary part and then you're done.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you don't like,
you don't even think of it as a scary part as an adult,
but right.
There's some weird thing.
Yeah.
Although she is surprisingly fine with,
there's this lava,
evil lava Island that comes to life in,
in Moana.
And she's like,
that's fine.
Yeah.
But it's weird.
Like the stuff that weirds you out as a kid,
but then,
but then she's like,
as boss,
baby's too bossy,
but he scares the shit
out of me and I'm an adult.
If a baby started talking like Alec Baldwin
and like
Alec Baldwin from that
movie where he's really mean to everyone.
Yeah, what's in your diaper?
The
You didn't see the movie yet, did you?
No.
Uh, there's a, there's a whole storyline in it with like a kid who's like afraid of a
painting that's in his dad's office.
And, uh, that, that's the kind of thing that kids are really scared of.
Like some weird drawing that you're like, Oh God.
I know there's definitely things from my childhood that I'm like, why did we have that in our house?
It wasn't even scary, but it was like this.
I was painting a very large, but it was never prominently placed.
It was in our basement of a woman carrying a baby, just like sort of an outline, not much detail.
But I was like, it stuck with me forever.
And it's not like an important piece of art
to anyone in the world.
And it was just in your house?
Yeah.
And you're like, why is this part of my brain?
Yeah.
Because it's something you saw every day.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm trying to think, like,
Yeah, I'm trying to think.
My dad had a photo of First Nations chief who was a runner.
He was one of the first long-distance runners.
Are you thinking of that episode of Saved by the Bell where Zach realizes he has indigenous roots and he becomes running Zach.
Is it an episode of that?
It was a poster of that episode.
Anyways, and it was like
in our basement and the stairwell going
down in the basement and
it was just like odd. It was just like
this black and white
photo of this guy
but there was no context to it,
and it was just there.
I think about that all the time
when I'm putting up a picture in the house.
I'm like,
is this going to leave a big mark on the kids?
But that's the thing,
is it'll be some weird thing
that you didn't even think,
and they'll just be like,
they'll just remember.
But I definitely don't want to put a scary,
you know,
monster picture.
No,
but that's the thing is the,
the picture in the,
the movie.
And it is just,
it's like,
it's not scary in and of itself,
but this kid's like,
he doesn't want to walk past it,
you know?
Cause it's like,
it freaks them out.
You know,
my,
my friends had, my friend's houses had aaks them out you know my my friends had my friends houses
had a lot of stuff like my one friend's dad had a lot of like old nazi stuff i don't think that
that would have as a kid i don't think it would have affected me as a teenager i went to some friends, a friend's house whose dad had like some, you know, Nazis stuff or even just like books about the Nazis with the hand swastikas on them.
And it was like, this is unsettling decor.
Yeah.
No, they had these.
You've probably seen it.
They're like little sculptures of old, like craggy men's faces.
And they have a set of them.
And one would be like a sailor.
And one,
are they made of wood?
Maybe wood.
And they're like,
they're small.
And you get,
you would like collect them,
I guess.
And they freaked me out as a kid.
I was like,
why would you have old man heads?
Why?
Your walls.
Anyways.
Yeah.
Anyway, so
Abby was going to
go see Star Wars.
That's right.
And then
I was like,
okay, and I'll
see it after you
at some point.
And then it
occurred to me
like, I don't
really remember
what happened in
The Force Awakens.
So maybe I should
rewatch that. It's on Netflix. It's not on Netflix. Oh, no. It i should re-watch that it's on netflix
it's not on netflix oh no it was on netflix did you ever watch it no no you haven't you've only
seen the three in the prequels i've seen the three in the prequels and yeah that's it and the
christmas and the christmas special and maybe the battle for endor which was i think just an ewok movie oh yeah ewok adventure
yeah yeah um uh so yeah so i i was like okay i i can't just watch this on netflix i wouldn't like
my plan was just to you know watch it 20 minutes at a time while i cleaned the living room uh
and so i was like okay well is it anywhere? Maybe I have to rent it
on demand. Right.
But then I can only watch it within 48 hours.
Oh boy. So I
did that. I rented
it, watched a little bit at a time,
fell asleep watching it
one night, watched it a bit the next
day, and then I was like, okay,
now I can finally see Star Wars, and I
got ready to go see Star Wars, and then I was like, now i can finally see star wars and i got ready to go see star wars
then i was like i don't want to see but you know what i do want to see the post with meryl streep
and tom hanks so you went saw the post yeah i saw the post how was it uh it was good yeah uh you
know they're great the meryl streep meryl
streep and hanks together right and steven spielberg directed it yeah do we deserve such a
powerful film i mean i don't know i i didn't know anything about it also i was like i just know
streep hanks and spielberg like i don't yeah and i think i know it's like old time like it's from the 70s or 80s or something
yeah it's from the 70s okay and um uh yeah it's really good it's it's about you know the washington
post yeah it's very heavy-handed like we gotta publish this i don't think we should we gotta
and it also you know when i started in this business, it was about ink.
Fucker.
My dad was an oily hack.
Yeah.
Is it like really are they acting at each other?
Like really just giving the old put your back into it.
Let's win a couple Oscars.
It's not sweaty.
Like, they're really good at it. Oh, of course.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But, like, a lot of strong decisions.
Yeah, like, Tom Hanks is doing a voice.
Oh, okay.
But it's not bad.
No.
And Meryl Streep is just Meryl Streep-ing it up.
She's got beautiful skin.
Oh, man.
Luminous, really.
And the one thing that really stood out was it's in the early
70s and there are some really bad extras like there's a scene with a bunch of hippies protesting
outside and like they're just whoever was directing these I must be the second unit, directing these hippies.
Oh, boy.
What was bad about them?
Oh, just like, just sort of like, you know, when you're an extra and you're like, what can I do to enhance the scene?
Like, there's a guy singing, playing guitar, and this other guy, like, grabs him by the shoulders, like, hey, man, cool.
Like, everyone's
like he's like making his own story well the thing like uh extras are they call them background
actors yeah and there's a few shots where they should be in the background and they're just like
way too prominent like these people are not they're not real hippies. Yeah. And they had,
um,
uh,
um,
there's another scene where like Meryl Streep is walking by and she's just,
uh,
I'm not going to spoil anything,
but like a really big thing has happened.
And,
uh,
all these women are like looking at her,
admiring her.
And it's just such a heavy handed,
like this is feminism. these women are like looking at her admiring her and it's just such a heavy-handed like
this is feminism she's a strong woman who did a strong gig and look at all the women who are
looking at her but like it's one of those uh movies i'm guessing that in the time when it
comes out everybody's like wow this is gonna be uh this oscar for sure this is gonna that in the time when it comes out, everybody's like, wow, this is going to be this Oscar for sure.
This is going to be in the Oscar race.
But then if you see it like years later, you're like, like I watched a movie last night that I remember was like big when Oscars came around.
And I was like, what was so good about this?
What was it?
Gone Baby Gone.
Oh, yeah.
It was fine.
But I'm like, I don't know.
This is like, like well there's
always like in every oscar race there's like a you know like a super prestigious you know old
timey movie and then there's one that's just like a solid oh this is just a solid whodunit yeah like
this is that in the race yeah this is just like a fun movie to watch but uh yeah it's like uh even over christmas we watch training day and like that's not good
you won an oscar is he good i've never seen it he i think it was one of those things where it's like
we owe you an oscar something that you should have won in another movie so here
yeah because it's pretty corny.
The whole movie's pretty like, it's fun to watch,
but you're like, what?
This was not meant for Oscars.
Anyways, The Post.
The Post, yeah.
I saw it in those D-box seats.
So when she was walking down that hallway,
you can really feel
Yeah, it was like a real rumble of the marble
When the printing press was going
It was real like
Yeah, when they stopped the presses
Whoa, you
It wasn't about stopping the presses
It was about whether or not to start them
Oh, yeah
That's sort of where it was about
Yeah, that's the twist yeah that's sort of where it was about yeah that's the that's the
new that's the twist and the uh there's one scene where she she's she owns the washington post
and she is uh in the printing press room looking at them you know hand or putting the letters
together yeah and she's just like oh and what wonderful i don't think the millionaire owner of a
newspaper ever goes and hangs out where they're printing it yeah i mean but it's like you need
some scenes oh half the movie is just people on the phone like and there's tons of there's tons of
uh great people in it like i only knew about streep and
hanks yeah bob and david from mr show are in it really they're both like they're in scenes
together oh that's awesome that's weird yeah that is weird um and like uh jesse plemmons
oh wow and tons of just tons of people are like oh that guy yeah that guy's good and everything
yeah the post but it just came, it was just a little cheesy.
Yeah.
But isn't like Spielberg, isn't that kind of his milieu?
No, he's great.
He is great.
But, you know, always like if there's a chance to be like sentimental.
I don't know.
You don't think so?
No, I think he's
Crystal Skull
Is probably
The best
Yeah that's probably
Yeah I would say
That or Bridge of Spies
Those are the
Bridge of Spies I like
I didn't see it
Oh it's good
Yeah
It's a real dad movie
Yeah
Nothing happens
Is The Post also a dad movie?
Yeah
Yeah
Who else was in the theater? Nothing happens. Is The Post also a dad movie? Yeah. Yeah.
Who else was in the theater?
Like the dad from Wonder Years. Oh, yeah, yeah.
The classic dad.
The dad from Happy Days, Tom Bosley.
The dad from Dinosaurs.
It was all famous dads and me.
It was a sunday afternoon no one like no one was even in the theater itself well no one was in the lobby right there were other movies
playing and it was just an unpopular day to see a movie i guess people don't go to sunday matinees
i don't know i don't know i don't so i know. But it was, um, like I could have snuck in because I walked in and I was going to, I got my ticket.
I was like, the movie was just about to start.
I had to go to the bathroom, but I also want to get popcorn.
So I didn't know, can I go to the bathroom out here or do I have to go in to get, and someone just let me in to go to the bathroom.
Yeah.
It's not coming out of their paycheck.
They don't work on commission.
They don't care.
Uh, so I could have could i could have snuck in
but you know it it's the wrong thing to do yeah were there any porgs in this movie there were uh
a few porgs the the movie was almost called the porgs and is the yeah i was just thinking is there
somebody that has made a movie poster of a couple porgs walking up those steps?
Is it steps on the poster?
I don't know the poster.
Oh.
I feel like it was like two people walking up the steps.
When I heard about the post, I thought it was about that post that Tonya Harding used to say.
Nancy Kerrigan.
It got its own film.
Yeah.
It was the competing Tonya Harding films.
Yeah.
It was the competing Tonya Harding films.
Look, I don't like when people say something is a dad joke.
That joke I just made was a dad joke.
And they had the trailers before the movie.
Yeah, yeah.
Which is always fun.
It's this new thing they're doing.
They had one for Mamma Mia 2.
Oh, yeah.
Here we go again.
It's a prequel.
Oh, is it?
Okay, that stitches it up.
Yeah.
I never saw Mamma Mia 1.
No, but I know that it's like, who's my dad?
Yeah. Is it going to be called Dad-a-mia?
Oh, yeah.
Or Papa-mia.
I don't know if Meryl, but like from what I could tell in the preview, I think Meryl Streep maybe dies in the first one.
Oh, that's sad.
But like.
Mama mia.
I never would have guessed that, it just Like they kind of portray her
With sort of a
Like in slow motion
Gauzy
Yeah
Footage
But then everyone else is back
Like
Pierce Brosnan
And
Well you can't make a
You can't make a prequel
Without Pierce Brosnan
So it's a prequel
And
Same time qual
The
But aren't all of
ABBA's good songs in the first one?
No. ABBA's got way more
songs than you need. They've got songs to spare.
Okay. I don't know.
I think I know
their greatest hits. Gold.
Yeah, but I don't know
that I know their deep
catalog. They've got
hits on hits. Yeah. they've got hits on hits yeah
it's on hits on hits well some of them aren't hits but it's all good it's all good love it
go see it go see mamma mia here we go again they probably were like when it was so successful that
they probably like do we have enough songs to make another because people want it people want uh but the
first one was based on a broadway show yeah did they make a sequel to the broadway show
i wouldn't be surprised it's gonna be bad this is gonna be bad yeah yeah well if it doesn't
have streep in it if it only has touches of street i. I don't know. I don't know if it does or not. Because I think the first one,
you know,
she made it pop.
Mm-hmm.
She's great.
Just look at her.
I know.
I know.
I didn't know I loved
Meryl Streep until recently.
Like, I kind of took her
for granted.
Well, I think that
that's the thing is
she's just been around
for so long.
Been good for so long.
Uh-huh.
Every year she makes
a great movie. Yeah. I know. It's the for so long. Every year she makes a great movie.
Yeah,
I know.
It's the same thing with Tom Hanks.
He's like,
you don't think you just like,
you're like,
Oh yeah,
Tom Hanks.
But then you look back at all the things he's done.
You're like,
wow.
But it's also like Tom Hanks.
Yeah,
he's great.
But also like,
I'm not really interested in this,
you know,
bridge of spies,
but it was good enough for Tom Hanks to do. Yeah. argue yeah like that one where he was uh he played walt disney sure
i was like i got no interest in this but i'm like what it's hanks yeah yeah which one was that uh
the one about called something it was just about m Mary Poppins. Oh, okay. Yeah. Like teaching Miss Tingle or something.
Yeah.
It was based on the woman who created Mary Poppins?
Yes.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And him trying to get her to live.
And it's BJ Novak.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, if it's good enough for Novak.
That's true.
He's made two films, as far as I know.
What's the other one?
He was in, i was gonna say
the inscrutable bastards but that's not it in gloria's yeah yeah yeah
uh the other prequel no the other preview they showed uh was this new clint eastwood movie
oh grand torino preview i mean like the same as a Tom Hanks movie.
If Clint Eastwood was a singer-songwriter and sang a song at the end of every movie he did, I would see every Clint Eastwood movie.
Oh, yes, absolutely.
This one is called The 1315 to Paris.
Okay.
And it's about a terrorist attack that took place a few years ago on a train.
Okay.
Like a guy had a gun and was shooting people.
Right.
And the real life heroes stopped him.
And he cast the real life heroes as themselves in the movie.
Whoa.
Weird.
It is weird.
Because to have that many non-actors in a movie, but acting opposite like Jenna Fisher.
Oh, that's weird i mean i really want to see it now also it's got like judy greer and uh tony hale and thomas lennon it's got a lot of comedy
it's gonna be funny it's got so many comedy people in it that it's That it's like,
huh.
It's gonna be bad though.
But I
wanna see it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
This has a lot
of ingredients
for
in the
1315
appearance.
Is he in it?
He's not in it.
I hope he sings.
I hope he sings.
I hope he's the voice
of the train.
I hope that it's like
a Thomas the Tank Engine
type of train.
Hey, stop shooting on me, bub.
Get him.
Don't let this bastard get away.
I like your Clint Eastwood impression a lot.
Yeah.
And all the empty chairs on the train.
He acts like Barackama is in them but like if you were
you know uh in a situation where you're just a good samaritan or whatever and then somebody was
like we want you to play yourself in a movie you'd say no right i am a very talented performer
that's true yeah you have a natural charisma.
The camera loves you.
Yeah, no, it is strange.
These guys are good-looking guys who did it, I guess.
What if an ugly person stopped the attack?
There would be no movie.
Hollywood wouldn't allow it.
Hollywood said no. But, yeah, it's really weird that not only that somebody would come up with that idea,
but that the people themselves would be like, yeah, we're okay with re-editing.
Yeah, yeah, we all survived.
And, yeah, cool.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know, I hear they have a lot of LaCroix on set.
So this is what I get about set life.
I've been following hashtag set life, so I'm interested in doing this.
Yeah, I've always wanted to eat jujubes out of a dish.
Yeah, I want to see a really big thing of Twizzlers.
And, you know, I can probably deliver the lines as me.
Not believably, but.
But I was thinking when you were talking about tom hanks and he because he's playing a guy who really existed in the you were off in your own
little world when i was talking no no no but i i had a moment there where i was uh i was taken away
um because sometimes you see the picture of the person that the famous person's playing,
and it's perfect.
Yeah.
Like, you're like, oh, nobody could have,
they're practically like they could have been brothers.
Like in Gladiator, Russell Crowe,
they show the picture of the real gladiator at the end,
and how he turned out, like what he's doing now.
Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road.
gladiator started his own sandal business he's still in the gladiator business training young gladiators but uh he's got a wife and a kid and you know he focuses on that he made all of his
money as a gladiator um yeah i uh and then sometimes it's just like oh you just got a
you just got the most uh famous actor you could get yeah look like maybe they growth they put
fake sideburns on to look like the era but that's that yeah uh but when they do that i don't understand why they
would show a photo of the person at the end to be like look at how bad the casting was
we we didn't even try um yeah well i'm gonna see that clint eastwood movie sure for sure do it yeah
because i'm fascinated by the concept i I'm going to, I want to hear about it.
I don't want to see it.
No.
But how do you know from the trailer?
It says like the actual.
Yeah.
And also the main, like you see Jenna Fisher for a flash in one shot and you see these
nobodies for the rest of the trailer.
But they're not like, yeah.
And it says like starring the real life heroes.
Wow.
That's really weird.
It would be weird too if they were like,
we're going to cast you, but not as yourself.
You're going to play the terrorist.
We're casting against.
Yeah.
You guys are real life heroes. You're going to play the terrorist. We're casting against type. Yeah.
You guys are real life heroes.
We're going to get, you know, a real bad guy to play the hero.
Yeah.
It's going to be, yeah, Christopher Walken's going to play the hero.
Who's the best at playing bad guys?
Hmm.
Like, I mean, a lot of them are character actors that I don't readily have their names available who am i afraid
of i mean there's definitely like like i feel like a malcolm mcdowell oh yeah or uh oh who's the guy
uh oh boy this is i can't remember a single movie that he's in. You know his face? Yeah, and it's so scary.
Oh no, I'm so scared for you.
Is it one of those carved wooden heads?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Is it one of those carved old man heads?
He looks like a fisherman.
Ah!
Why would anybody collect those?
Can you get closer to who this bad guy is?
He's bald.
Bald guy, English, and older. Oh yeah yeah oh so scary i'm so afraid of that guy
yeah yeah yeah uh um yeah uh roy winstone no but yes that guy's so scary. I don't know if I can picture him.
No.
I'll figure it out. Okay.
So that was me.
Yeah.
What's up with you?
I've also been watching a lot of these old movies.
You know, it's the wintertime.
It's weather.
Yes.
You can't go out.
It's too cold.
And I mean, the weather inside is so inviting.
The fire is so inviting.
And so,
like I said last week, I was trying
to watch old movies.
The fire is so
inviteful.
It took me a second to realize I got that wrong.
The fire is delightful. Oh yeah, the fire
is delightful. As long as it stays in the
fireplace. I mean, I'm a bit of a pyro.
Yeah, you like it wherever you can get it, right?
Yeah, right.
I'm a sex bomb.
And so I watched one yesterday, and I was like.
Is this from your movie channels?
This is from the movie channels.
98% on Rotten Tomatoes.
Oh, okay.
Ooh, can i guess what decade
1970s it was an australian film oh i'm out um it was called picnic and hanging rock
and oh man like it's a mystery and at the end you don't find out oh yeah it was a dream it might as well have been uh but it's uh they made movies uh a lot slower
back then yeah like uh uh not it's not that nothing happens but like what happens you could
summarize in a in a 10 minute or you yeah last and Hanging Rock There's a lot of like, you would have picked up the shot
Like a lot later
In the early James Bond movies
You see a lot of him walking
And I'm going from here to here
It's true
Yeah, I mean like a lot of
You know, for example when they say we're going to this picnic
And hanging rock
Hey, just head right to hanging rock
Yeah
You know, outdoor exterior shot Hanging rock say we're going to this picnic and hang a rock hey just head right to hang a rock yeah yeah
outdoor exterior shot hanging yeah instead it's like huh where do we put the picnic blanket well we gotta check the linen closet the upstairs linen closet yeah that's the only
linen closet well what about this down here that's not really linens that's more towels
98 around to venus who's rating them uh like are these i guess whoever was doing movie reviews in
the 70s are they going back i don't think they go back and they find old ones well uh except uh
what's his name uh roger ebert his was one of the ones. Oh. On there.
But yeah, it was all like realviews.com or real, you know, spelled how it would be.
Sure.
But yeah, no, like I don't know why movies are the way they are now.
No. Because they are, there aren't that slow anymore.
And yet there's still two and a half hours.
Yeah.
I mean, that was at least, like,
the thing about this was it was an hour and a half.
And so I was like, eh, even if I don't like it,
I've done it an hour and a half.
But, oh, man, that hour and a half seems like
a long time.
And this guy, like, went on to make, like,
the Truman Show and Dead Po dead poet society what's his
name peter weir no nope he's australian um and uh yeah so i've been doing that been trying to
watch these old movies i'm wondering if i'm going to see star wars now yeah i wonder that too i
wonder if i ever will see star wars because i feel like I feel now after re-watching that other one.
Yeah.
Like, oh, this is just sort of tacked on.
Like, I feel like the story was told.
Yeah.
And they're just, this is kind of fan fiction now.
Yeah.
And I mean, it's definitely like something to see, you know, because they got all the effects now that I think he probably George Lucas
wanted when he made the first three and he had to settle for like smoke
machines and miniatures and stuff.
And things that people genuinely liked.
Now I feel like it's a lot of people trying to convince themselves.
Yeah.
These are,
these are part of it.
These are,
this is good.
There was a,
what's his name?
Uh,
that made a apocalypse now. These are, this is good. There was a, what's his name? Uh, that made,
uh,
apocalypse now.
Uh,
yeah.
He always said that the biggest tragedy with George Lucas was that he kind of
made the star Wars movies and then he just kind of stayed in that world and he
didn't keep like making different things because,
uh,
it's like a Steven Spielberg made just Indiana Joneses.
Yeah. Like it's like, those were good, made just indiana joneses yeah like it's like
those were good but like okay what else what other because you're you know you're like a very
talented guy obviously like what other kind of movies do you want to know what i want to know
like what you know why do they have those helmets yeah exactly but like so I'm not sure I really enjoy the Star Wars thing anymore.
Right.
But that's sort of the only one of those that I have enjoyed up till now.
Right.
Like, I'm out of comic book movies.
Yeah.
I don't want any Hobbit stuff.
I don't like, you know, I don't like Star Trek.
Right.
So Star Wars was your one stand.
Yeah.
So I think I have to hold on to it.
Yeah.
I think I gotta.
It's a weird, because now they are, they're just going to make, they're going to just make them all the time.
Like it's going to be, there's, I don't even think there's anything that you could compare it to.
And I feel like I was kind of putting off seeing it because, oh, it'll be in the theaters until April.
But I don't think they have that big of an impact anymore now that they're yearly.
Right.
Yeah.
And it's like, but is there anything else?
I guess comic book movies.
But before that, what are their movies where it's just like, well, I guess maybe like Dracula movies.
There was always Dracula movies coming out.
Yeah.
Yeah.
movies there was always dracula movies coming out yeah yeah i guess you know but not not by like one studio about one story where it's like and now another yeah what did they have before i guess
back to the future but like back in the like old old days i guess they had like uh zoro or like a
detective sure would be in like yeah zoro exactly tarzan you know and it'd be like, yeah, Zorro, exactly, Tarzan.
And it'd be like, yeah, I guess we'll just go watch another Tarzan movie.
Oh, boy.
Tarzan prequel now.
Oh, he got to the jungle?
Yeah, jungle to jungle.
That was a Tarzan prequel.
So you were about to say, what else is going on?
So I did this show on Saturday.
It's Vancouver's Next Top Mayor, right?
And the only reason I did that show was because I booked the space before I had an idea for what show.
And this was at the Little Mountain Gallery.
Little Mountain.
And you booked the space.
How often do you book a space there?
I booked it because there wasn't going to be a quiz show in January.
So I was like, oh, we'll do something else.
We'll book a space.
So this was months ago.
And I didn't ever come up with a concept for what the show was going to be.
Uh-huh.
And then.
Because.
Okay, go on.
Yeah.
Well, because like it was going to be called like a graham clark presents so it was like it had to have some sort of theme or whatever um and so i
didn't have an idea so then i went on twitter and i said i'll give 50 bucks to anybody who comes up
with an idea for sure and like people had pretty good ideas. I was, I was pretty impressed by the ideas that came forward.
There was one guy who even was like, I made a film and I need a space and like to have like a show it like a viewing party for it.
And I was like, what about that?
I was like, I don't know.
You should organize your own thing.
Yeah.
And, and I give you 50 bucks.
I book you a venue and give you 50 bucks.
bucks i book you a venue and give you 50 bucks but yeah one uh uh one person on twitter came up with a because the mayor had just announced that he wasn't gonna run again run again oh he'll
keep running he'll stay in shape he's a very fit mayor oh man mostly biking he's probably
i'm gonna say i'm gonna say it without any evidence probably canada's fittest mayor
yeah and like certainly by the British slang, like
he's, he's fit.
He's fit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Don't he know it?
Isn't it?
Yeah.
Uh, and it was especially, uh, I mean, that's
like, he was, he's not going to run for a fourth
term.
Like, so he's a very popular mayor for a very
long time.
And why not?
Uh, people are happier than ever in this city.
Uh.
Everything's, uh's clicked along.
Things are going right.
Things are just running on time.
People aren't just dying in the street.
And you know what?
He never said that he was going to solve that
problem. That wasn't one of the major tenets
of his
platform.
It's more affordable than ever to live here.
no funny business is going on with who even owns these
houses.
So everything has worked out pretty well.
But yeah, so then I
had to come up with... Bike lanes, bike lanes!
Although, you know, people love those bike
lanes. People with bikes.
Yeah, people on the, you know, 80 days a year, it doesn't rain.
They like them.
I'm not saying we shouldn't have bike lanes.
No, I know.
We're going a little crazy.
But you know that there was like a study that came out that said the
Burrard Bridge was the most used uh bike lane in the whole north america
yeah so you know good for us i mean we really did it uh and look and look at our look at our
thighs and look at our shins look at how shiny our shins are look at this streak of mud up our backs
um but usually i put on these shows uh i don't get any press or anything, you know?
Oh yeah.
Uh, so this is one show all of a sudden, like I was getting all these, uh, requests and
the show sold out pretty quick just because it's, there's not that many seats.
So you didn't need to promote it.
Nope.
And, uh, and so I got an interview with a local newspaper, uh, the courier, by the way,
Vancouver courier stopped delivering it to my house.
I don't want it.
Like it gets, it comes here every week now.
For years it never came.
I have a no junk mail thing out there.
Yeah.
Don't bring it here anymore.
Yeah.
And you know what?
They're going to get that message.
Yeah.
I mean, it goes right in the recycling.
I don't even take the elastic off.
I mean it goes right in the recycling I don't even take the elastic off
But
So I did this interview
With the courier
And then they were like
We'll get a photo to go with it
And I was like oh this is actually
This isn't just a little blurb
So they were like
We want you to wear a suit
And go down to City Hall and have your picture taken
And jack off.
And jack off in front of the statue of John Vancouver or whatever.
George.
Yeah.
And so I don't wear a suit very often.
And even the guy on the phone was like, you own a suit, right?
Yes.
I own them.
Yeah.
I mean, you never know when a funeral is gonna or a wedding or a breast these are the three suit things that you need uh but
very much i look like i was on my way to a court appearance uh i think that's what everybody on
the bus and then train and be walking was thinking.
Get a load of Johnny suit over here.
He's getting his kids back.
Well, he's got to prove he can just have them for a weekend.
Yeah.
I mean, he tried this whole scheme where he dressed up like a nanny to see them.
And that really blew up in his face.
I want to see the thing at the end of Mrs. Doubtfire that says what he's doing now.
Well, didn't he end up with a real kid show?
But I want to know what the real Mrs. Doubtfire.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
And then you see it doesn't
look at it and it doesn't look believable
at all.
He's wearing
a pig head.
The real Mrs. Doubtfire was committed he's wearing a pig head the real mrs.
deathfire was committed
to parenting
yeah that's right
yeah committed
to being a great dad
but he was
institutionalized
in that his tv show
became an institution
and then he was 51 50 when he joined van halen
um yeah so as i had my picture taken in a suit in the pouring rain of course um but you can't
tell i can't tell by the picture it turned out to be a nice little photo and the show was fine, but yeah, it was more press than I, and I also don't know anything about.
Politics.
Yeah.
I mean, I'm not like, I like, I read the newspaper, but I wouldn't be like, then here's another thing, you know?
I mean, municipal politics.
I don't like.
But that's what talk radio seems to be all about.
That's like, today we're talking about, you know, the school board.
But like, and who are the maniacs who show up to city council meetings and say a thing?
I've always wanted to go to a city council meeting just to see like what it's actually like.
Because I know I've seen footage and i've seen a dramatized
in the meeting last year's oscar darley is that a movie no okay uh but you know you see it like
in aaron brockovich or something like our water is no good and then here's like what do you want
me to do about it you know get me brockovich and they turned on the brockovich light was that
one of those movies that was oscar bait and doesn't hold up uh i haven't seen it since it
came out i haven't seen it since ever really yeah it's it's fine sure brah uh yeah and she's like
got really a fun relationship with her boss oh yeah yeah yeah uh yeah i would say see it okay yeah five stars 98 98 percent um but like uh
yeah i don't i've never been to a town hall meeting i've never been to any of those
have i no i've been to a debate i've been to a mayoral debate and uh and stood in line to ask
a question and never got to ask a question
Because the line was very long
And some people asked multiple questions
Oh, and some people just made statements
And some people kind of did that Q&A thing
That they do where it's not really even a question
And it's just like
Just to prove that they read a book
Yeah, I was reading this
How would you say And I'm i've seen all your work
um as mayor but how would you say that garbage collection and i and i'm talking about garbage
citywide and recycling and yard trimming uh and when that was brought in, the yard trimming program, I remember a little bit of controversy because, well, I'll get to that later.
But my real point in being here is dab.
Baba Booey.
Oh, no.
He tricked us all.
Yeah. So I did a show, no. He tricked us all. Yeah.
So that's, I did a show, got my mug and paper.
Oh, yeah.
That paper is probably.
Probably sitting on your porch.
Probably in my back recycling bin getting soaked right now.
Yeah.
I had to like, I had to actually like go and find a box that had it because i wanted a copy of
it yeah because they just deliver it to people who don't want it yeah yeah yeah exactly the
second you want it gone um do you think you'll bring politics into your work now because it's
it moves product yeah i mean like obviously that's what everybody wants to hear i don't know what yeah i don't know
what you could do with politics because do people really care is the question look i don't know
yeah i don't know like i know they care when they're angry i know and i know they care about
like big time politics yeah but like But like who you, anyone can,
I mean like,
how do you,
you know,
there's a million people talking about Trump.
Yeah.
But what do you do about like,
who cares about local politics?
I don't know.
Apparently people.
Yeah.
People,
people beat writers.
Yeah. Yeah.
They want to.
So yeah,
I think like,
uh,
I would,
if I had anything to say, but I don't know.
But does that matter?
This is the question.
I don't think so.
Yeah.
Like I could just, I could just become a political comedian and be like, ah, man.
You know, make jokes about that.
You don't even really get the issues at hand.
Like mayors, you know, you you know i always see them rolling up
their sleeves was with forearms yeah yeah yeah anyway you decide a lot of like people want that
at the end so they can feel smart yeah or is it yeah yeah yeah that's true um but i also like
it's a weird thing of like with you, you know, federal politics and provincial politics, I know where I stand on things.
Yeah.
Like, it's easy to be right wing or left wing because you're like, oh, yeah, raise taxes, lower taxes.
Right.
You know, you know, provide for these people and give these people more rights.
Right.
It's not going to cost these people rights.
Right.
But in municipal politics, it's like, I don't know where I like.
Yeah.
Well, that money's got to come from somewhere.
Okay.
Yeah.
Like sometimes it'll be, you'll vote for something like the mayor and you're like done.
And then it's like vote for seven school counselors.
And you're like, Oh yeah.
Who are these people?
Oh my God.
What do I want out of a school counselor
what have they what promises have they made and then there's sometimes taco tuesdays
no way my kids aren't even in school but like then they sometimes have like a question
like a question thing that you vote on oh yeah like a plebiscite or whatever oh boy
and then you feel
really like oh i haven't done any research at all
um now uh before we move on to a bit of business uh well we have a another uh segment that we'd
like to uh talk about and that segment is one that goes a little something like this talk about
wow that is what is a goblin from jason d it's guys it's uh an emotional
farewell yeah what is a're dead and they wear sheets
We understand the vampire
We're aware of what they eat
But there's that one creature
That escapes all definition
So listen in while Dave and Brim
Start the inququisition.
This is a long one.
What is a goblin?
What is a goblin?
I thought that was the end.
Nope.
Well, off I go
That was really good harmony.
That was Mike F. with the What is a Goblin theme.
And what I like so much about what we've done...
Uh-oh, here's another one.
What is a goblin?
I don't know.
It's like Cat Stevens.
Yeah, I thought maybe a David Bowie.
Oh, yeah.
Something that goes to the police as goblins go.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Why don't you prove to me That you've seen a goblin
In the woods
I don't know that goblins live in the woods
But I probably thought
That someone said that
Goblins are good for you
Now don't feel you need to use the whole
20 seconds
Everybody
I eat goblins.
Now, the thing about a good theme is it has a long chord at the end.
That was Eric N. with the What is a Goblin theme.
And, you know, the thing about this question
is that it's been asked by a lot of...
Oh, okay, here's another one.
Wow.
It's Kyle. Off I go.
That's Kyle.
That's Kyle S.
Oh, boy.
Goblin theme.
And we did it, I don't know, we did it for six or seven weeks.
We did it.
And I don't know.
Okay.
All right. All right. A young blondie.
Sure.
That was Julia H. with the What is a Goblin theme.
And, guys, we've been joking around a lot.
We've been pretending we don't know that another theme is coming.
But this time, whoa!
Tell me what is a goblin?
What the fuck is a goblin?
Short and sweet.
That was Ira W.
Who wants to know?
That's it for the goblin themes.
Thanks everyone who sent one in.
What a talented bunch
Of listeners we have
I really enjoyed the weeks we did it
I think we've reached the end of it
Yeah and I think
I think we figured it out
I think we've
If you took all of the answers
And you put them all into a composite
You'd have a
What do you remember?
That they have tufts of hair
chris james wet that they're wet a lot of people said wet wide tongue wide tongue that maybe kayla
bald bald um uh aaron reed had the real life guy who like gave him a bad compliment at a club
right uh uh you know last week's guest said that it was a surfing.
Yes.
A lot of tattered shorts.
Yeah.
Tattered shorts.
Maybe like a rope, a rope for a belt.
Yeah.
So we got there.
Yeah.
Um, and I really enjoyed the, like, uh, uh, you know, coming over the new segment, just it, we didn't plan to come up with it.
We just ended up talking about goblins a couple weeks in a row and so we asked you to send in your themes and you provided and
they were all great yeah yeah they're not a stinker in the bunch i wish we'd had enough
enjoyment like i wish it had sort of uh had enough steam to to to carry us through all of
those themes but it felt like if we kept
doing it we would have kept getting more themes and we would have been stuck in this loop forever
yeah uh but anyway watch bright on netflix it's a goblin movie goblin cop it's probably the the
newest goblin movie you can point to but because of the success of it watch out for more uh should we move on to a bit
of business yeah man life can be fun don't get carried away you gotta do the things you don't
want to do to get through the day you gotta shine your shoes you gotta sweep the floor you gotta
clean your house you gotta do some more take care of business we got a jumbo this week.
This one is for Nate, and it is from Christina,
Aaliyah, pardon my pronunciation if that's wrong,
and Elliot, which I definitely pronounced right.
The message is, happy 40th birthday.
Sorry this is just a message and not a special gift certificate like Dave gives Graham at Christmas.
Well, it's kind of like, you know, this is good for one listening of a...
Oh, you know what?
Every year I do my gift certificates.
Yeah.
And every year I feel like they go on too long.
And this year I actually cut them.
Yeah.
I think I maybe...
I'll be right back.
Vamp.
Oh, okay.
Well, what's in the news these days?
Well, that Trump, he's, oh boy, he's at it again.
And, you know, he was trying to get on an airplane and his hair blew all crazy.
And so a lot of people have been talking about his bald head.
Oh, good.
Thank God.
Okay. Here's one of the gift certificates i didn't give you good for one romantic drive in the country
i'll just put the car in gear away we go and i'll just slow down around this curve oh no something's
wrong the brakes have been cut quick get on the roof and climb to the back of the car and hold on to the bumper and drag yourself behind the car and just low it down.
Phew, you did it.
That was one
of those. There you go. Happy birthday.
That's the quality that gets cut.
Also
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Overheard. Overheard.
Overheard.
Now, what is that?
Now, it's a segment we've been doing for a while.
I mean, it's no goblin segment.
Uh-huh.
But, you know, you're... Well, now, what do I think a goblin is?
Hmm, that's an interesting question, and I'm glad it was asked.
Thank you for asking me that question. think webbed yeah oh sure webbed
everything oh like a shape of water i haven't seen it yet oh i mean if you like webbed thing
i'm not gonna see it well if you don't like webbed things you out there in the listening audience
boy is it the movie for you okay like i mean, I mean, if you like, if you really like webbed things, you know what I mean?
Is he webbed?
Is he webbed everywhere?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I think so.
I think it's implied.
You know.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So he can, you know, go faster.
Which is what the ladies are looking for.
A guy who, they don't want to spend a lot of time on sex.
It's not like, I'm not thanking you ma'am yeah i thought this whole deal it's not like wham bam bye yeah it's
thank you ma'am i'm a polite young man um you know we hear things out there in the world and then we talk about them. When? Overheard. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah.
A goblin.
And we usually start with the guest, but no guest.
So we start with the Dave.
Here's what's my overheard.
And this is one that is really going to be a famous overheard forever.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, it's not.
mis-overheard forever.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, it's not.
The other day, I was dropping Margo off.
Abby and I were both dropping Margo off at preschool.
Yeah.
And her class is three and four-year-olds.
And normally, it goes smoothly.
She's been in this class since September.
Everyone is very familiar with everyone in the class.
Yeah.
And so, but for some reason,
a lot of kids were having trouble that day.
Okay.
Didn't want to get dropped off.
The mom would start to leave and the kid would run into the class and chase her down.
Huh?
And Margo was a little clingy that day as well.
And then,
uh, the, uh, and then another kid was waiting in the hallway with his mother and he just hiccuped.
And he suddenly got the idea that, oh, if I have the hiccups, I won't have to go to class.
And he said, oh, I have the hiccups.
And his mom said, you know what cures the hiccups?
Go to class and reading a book.
Now go.
Yeah, I guess when you haven't learned the spectrum of ailments.
Yeah.
Where you're like,
a hiccup, that's a disease, right?
It might be catching.
Yeah.
And just the mother was not having it.
Yeah.
And with good reason.
Yeah.
Once you get to the point of drop-off, I assume you've had it. Yeah. And with good reason. Yeah.
Once you get to the point of drop off, I assume you've had it.
Well, and also like this shouldn't be happening.
You're like this class.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
It's a.
This room full of nice ladies that you always really like.
What do you think? The moon?
Is it something to do with the moon?
I think so.
Yeah.
Maybe the kids have all, their cycles have all synced up.
Yeah.
There's a tantrum cycle.
That car alarm's going off again?
Maybe that person should just, you know, disable their car alarm.
Yeah.
Or, you know, scratch up their car because somebody's always trying to steal it.
You know?
But like, that's i i
don't hear car alarms very much anymore no you also don't see a lot of cars with those bras anymore
remember when those were the thing yeah yeah anyways what was the point of those to protect
the front end yeah against little bug chips and stones chips and stones will break my bones but what will hurt you um i guess you
know names yeah yeah the names will never hurt me unless they're mean names yeah which case
yeah stick with you forever yeah or someone like just says a bad thing about you on the internet
yeah hurts yeah sticks and stones may break my bones, but one-star iTunes reviews. Ouchie.
They stick with you.
Yeah, ouchies.
My overheard is courtesy of a woman.
Real, she was loud talker talking, I'm not sure, to anyone in particular.
I thought there was a woman with her, and then I was like, oh, no, she's by herself.
Where? This is
out on the street and
then she saw
a streetwalker?
Well, I mean, isn't that anybody walking
in the streets a streetwalker? Oh, hey.
Hey, what?
And she saw
a little dog
walking up and she said,
oh, it's a baby doggy
and then her owner
who was not having any of it said
she's six.
Is it as big as she's going to get?
It's not a baby and I'm tired of people
saying that.
Halfway through her life.
This is a midlife crisis.
She's already got her
old dog shots.
Do you get different shots when you're old, dog?
No, but you get the same shots over and over.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
They just feel, you're just like, oh, here we go again.
You're speaking of here we go again, the car alarm going off again.
Do you think it's somebody that has their keys in their pocket
and they're having a nap and they're rolling around for hours yeah it's a do you think it's a fussy baby's car i think maybe the baby is
biting the oh yeah and it's the only thing that'll calm the baby down and so so what so the neighbors
have to hear some honking horns big deal um Now, we also have overheards sent in from people over there, over here, in between.
If you want to send one in, you can send it in to spy at maximumfun.org.
Now, I'm having phantom hearing of this, Carlo.
I'll take my headphone off to listen.
Is it going?
No, I'll put it back on.
Is it now?
Is it? Like that, I'll put it back on. Is it now? Is it?
Like that one wasn't fake.
It's not going.
This first one comes from Christopher K.
No, not Christopher K.
Yeah, Christopher K.
From my elementary school?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
High school?
Yeah.
Was he a valedictorian?
What was he?
No.
He was a good friend.
Yeah? Athletic. Oh, okay. Was he a valedictorian? What was he? No, he was a good friend. Yeah.
Athletic.
Oh,
okay.
Uh,
track.
Sure.
Yeah.
Did he,
uh,
did he get a letter on his,
uh,
sports jacket?
Um,
it's his sports coat.
It's for a goat.
Did he get a letter on his,
uh,
dinner jacket?
Uh,
it's varsity jacket.
Yeah.
Uh,
it's going again.
Yep.
Stupid Carla. And the worst thing is the audience can't hear it so we're just we seem crazy i assure you audience there is
a car alarm going off seemingly no but then it's off and then it'll come back on again
but the weird thing is it's on when it goes off.
Yeah.
Like a sex bomb.
So this was in the cafeteria at work.
Somebody talking about a dog.
Jeez Louise.
That really is something.
Yeah, I think maybe the car alarm's broken.
You think somebody's trying to steal the car alarm?
Is that what's going on?
Yeah, maybe it's not even attached to a car
It's just a horn and the unit
So we start again
It's still going
This is from Christopher K
In Massachusetts
Talking about a dog
Her poop is so small
That you would tell if a chess piece came out So this is a dog Talking about a dog Her poop is so small That you would tell
If a chess piece came out
So this is a dog
Who swallowed a chess piece
Sure
I don't know
How
Like a pawn
Easy to swallow
I've almost swallowed it
Just playing chess
Accidentally
If I get excited
About a check
Oh yeah
You don't want to swallow
A big jagged rook
So many
Square edges Come come on.
Come on, car
alarm.
How many days has it been
going off like that? Today.
Just a few hours, like
maybe three hours.
This next one
comes from Laura
F. While walking down
St. Catherine West in Montreal,
I caught this little gem.
A girl handing out promotional flyers in front of a business.
Hi, do you want a piece of paper?
After being ignored, she turns to the next person.
Do you want a piece of paper?
I'm not getting paid per piece of paper.
Right.
Yeah.
You know, no one wants these but maybe somebody does like oh yeah I gotta write
something down
or I gotta spit my gum out
loose leaf
loose leaf
extra extra
this one's got a scribble on it
I've done it
before I've handed out flyers and that is what it
feels like you feel like you're harassing but are you self-promoting yeah yeah well i also
own that strip club for a while sure the hottest boobs in town and ma'am would you also like to
see some boobs yeah um but self-promoting is different because it's like your ass on the line if you're promoting
if you're handing out flyers for a business that you don't care one way or the other
little caesar's hot hot and ready pizza pizza hot and ready
um and the final one comes from ryan d from houston texas uh sitting at a small pub in my
neighborhood there's a group of four people sitting behind me, and I just heard a guy say,
I've had a Four Loko and a Bud Light Platinum, and I have no idea what's going on.
What's a Bud Light Platinum?
I don't know.
A Four Loko is like an alcoholic energy drink, didn't it, that people drank years ago.
Yeah.
Are they back?
I thought they were banned.
I don't know that they ever went away.
I think, like, you know, it's just like smearing off ice.
They're not as popular as they were in their glory moment, but sure, you can still pick one up.
Budweiser Platinum?
Yeah, I guess for the special events in a young person's life.
It has a pale golden color and delivers a light and slightly sweet taste while retaining the smoothness and drinkability you expect from Bud Light.
Huh.
Use offer code SPY to get...
Whoa.
On ratebeer.com.
Oh, which is, that's my homepage.
That's what I have set on my computer.
It gets a zero
percent rating 474 so 474 people have rated oh no it says the weighted average is 1.65 out of five
okay without clicking through it said it got a zero rating anyway it's a uh great looking beer and oh it's
it's a higher alcohol budweiser yes so that's why this person was so their heads swimming yeah
in addition to overheards that are written in we also accept your phone calls i still don't know
the phone number i'm not gonna pretend i do i just don't think the bit is funny anymore. I disagree.
I stall for time.
1-844-779-7631.
That's one.
Ugh.
Spy point one.
Like these people have.
This is a drunk, uh, a drunk, a drunk call? Um, yeah. Or, also an overheard.
Yes.
Um, I was just at the bar, uh, here in Rock Hill, local, um, called McCale's and the
shit. Sorry.
Um, okay.
Yeah. Um,
I don't remember.
He called back.
He tried. He had just had a
four logo and a Bud Light Platinum.
Okay. Alright. I remember.
Okay, so I was at,
um,
I was at McHale's
and the bar
y'all never been to.
Um,
and the,
and the bartender
was talking to a
regular and,
uh,
they were talking
about,
they were talking
about,
um,
different,
uh, benefits and, benefits and disadvantages to sleep.
Sleep said blankets versus comforters.
And the bartender said, you know, I just don't know, man.
I'm just trying to get comfortable.
And I thought that was pretty good and uh
off I go
yeah man
I'm just trying to get comfortable
I don't want to talk about these things all night
does that
register as
remarkable at all
no
but the journey I think was it was more about the journey it was absolutely
all about the journey but just it was like more of a like here's why you don't you maybe you
shouldn't drink so much is because you'll evaluate something that was not at all entertaining and
i gotta call this in
sorry bud it was uh it was a wild ride.
I enjoyed hearing you go through that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know, really, the overheard, it was you.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Hi, this is Gina from Tuscaloosa, Alabama, calling in with an overheard.
I was in New York at the Met's Hot Me retrospective, and they had some of his early work, including a painting called Cleaning Teeth, which has two kind of blobby anthropomorphic characters, one blue, one red, 69ing, except that instead of genitals, they have Colgate tube, cleaning teeth.
And behind me, there was a couple, maybe in their upper 70s or 80s.
And the woman was saying to the man with increasing impatience,
It's oral sex, Bob.
Oral sex.
Oral sex. sex well off I go
maybe that kind of stuff
is going to fly in Alabama
but
yeah
you know
yeah
watch your language
um
but that is how teeth
would do it
how teeth would
have sex
it would 69
it would be all
it would be all
Colgate this and that.
So tough with teeth because the roots go so deep.
Like.
Yeah, that's true.
Like I'm so attracted to the part I can see, but then, oh, I didn't, I wasn't expecting that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
When, if you pull a tooth, does that part come out too?
Or does that stay in the head?
They're like the root.
It all comes out. Gross that stay in the head? The like, the root. It all comes out.
Gross.
Stay in the head.
Well, I mean the little bloody part, the nerve part.
Oh, the nerve isn't the root.
The root is the tooth part below the cervix.
Oh yeah, I know.
Like that part comes out.
I don't want to talk about the bloody part.
Okay.
Like the cinnamon center.
Shut up.
Hey, Dave Graham and possible guests.
This is Ben in Los Angeles.
I was recently waiting in line outside of a comedy show that a member of Kids in the Hall was going to be on.
And the people in front of me were talking about the show.
And one of them said, now, who's Scott
Thompson?
Is that the guy with the bow tie and the mustache?
And her friend turned to her and said, no, no, no, that's Scott F. Thompson.
Well, off I go.
That's Ben Harrison, a MaxFun host.
He hosts Star Trek show
right
and
war movie show
yeah
I have a
I have a friend
who's addicted
to that Star Trek show
oh yeah
yeah yeah yeah
I think you really
have to
have
have seen
Star Trek
or be interested
in Star Trek well enjoy a star
trek show well from am i wrong from my what i hear is uh there's way more people who have
who know who are into star trek and have heard that show then we will ever know in our audience
yes i mean yes the star trek enjoying audience it's a lot of people and the star trek
the ben harrison enjoying audience yeah they're very large yeah there's a great they're in charge
yeah yeah yeah and uh you know they're they're a part of a generation some would say they're
great greatest who knows anyway anyway it's called Star Trek Show.
Listen to it on MaxFun.
It's called Star Trek Live.
It's a college.
Yeah.
You call in with your...
What was our call-in show idea?
Talk about cards.
Your cards are worth anything.
No Pokemon.
No Pokemon.
We'll do a special once-a-year Pokemon call-in.
But no Pokemon.
If you call in with pokemon no pokemon
this isn't that's the catchphrase from the show i kind of want to do this show i don't know
yeah i don't know anything about cards like that i know but i think we would be fun with it yeah
because we would like we would i think we'd get we'd be like the opposite of pond stars we would
definitely be like oh yeah that's worth thousands we'd get, we'd be like the opposite of Pawn Stars. We would definitely be like, oh, yeah, that's worth thousands.
What you're describing to me sounds like a great card.
It's got to be worth thousands.
Well, we should do it for the Max Fundra.
Oh, yeah, maybe.
Anyway.
I think, how do we get call-in technology?
Other shows do it.
We'll ask them.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't, I'm too shy, though.
Yeah, but you know what?
It'd be fun.
It'd be fun to do it.
Yeah.
You know.
Card show.
Yeah.
No Pokemon.
No.
Now, that's the end of the show here.
All we have to plug is that we have a live podcast coming up March 8th at the Biltmore Cabouret.
Cabouret.
Yeah, it's the scariest show in town.
We haven't announced our guest yet.
Neither have our brains.
Yeah.
We don't know our guest yet.
But we will.
Yeah.
Rest assured, by the time this show happens we
will have figured
it out.
And as with all
of our live shows
we get the audience
to come in with
their overheards.
We'll also accept
if people would
like us to
evaluate their
cards.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But you know
the rule.
Yeah.
No Pokemon.
No Pokemon.
And if you like
this show you
can go you can
check out our Twitter account. you know, at Stop Podcasting.
We have a Facebook group.
It's very active.
Yo, boy.
I mean, hyperactive, some would say.
Oh, boy.
Like these kids today.
Oh, yeah.
Too much sugar.
Too many screens.
Too many screens.
I think they put chemicals in the water and make their brains fried.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then they got to get their tooth pulled, including the little put chemicals in the water, make their brains fried. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
And then they got to get their tooth pulled,
including the little red part of the middle.
So gross.
Um,
and you know what?
If you like the show,
tell your face.
Yeah.
Eat it,
listener.
And,
uh, if you really like your show,
um,
uh,
go just track down some people
who listen to that Star Trek show
and get them to listen to our show.
Their audience is so big.
Yeah.
And we love you and no Pokemon.
No Pokemon.
Thanks.
Join us next week
for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself.
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