Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 689 - Rebecca Kohler

Episode Date: June 1, 2021

Rebecca Kohler joins us to talk body horror, demolition, and Rod Stewart.

Hi, he's Dave Shumka and he's Graham Clark and together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 689 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who we're positive now that we're starting the show, Mr. Dave Shumka. Look, you know, a lot of false starts in Usain Bolt's career, but he still is the best runner. Usain Bolt's career, but he still is the best runner. And this show, with all of its false starts, is just going to be the... Does Usain Bolt have a name?

The Jamaican Stallion. Yeah. The Jamaican Me Crazy. Fast Man in the Golden Shoes. See, he didn't need a name because his name was Bolt. That's true. He didn't need to come up with a name. He's doing Olympic this year, yes come up with it are he's doing olympic this year

yes i know i think he's done he like set all the records that'll never be broken he stopped doing olympic i think yeah last olympic was his last olympic oh i think we need it we need him he he needs to like i need to go out there and lose yeah i kind of like to see a guy dominate the world and then get too old and lose. So we're sure that the next generation is good. Yes, that's true. The opposite of a participation ribbon. Yes, you get to bury the 33-year-old or whatever. Our guest today, a very funny comedian, first time here on the podcast.

It's Rebecca Kohler, everyone. Hi, guys. Hey, how's it going? guest today a very funny comedian first time here on the podcast it's rebecca kohler everyone hi guys hey uh how's it going uh you know pretty good uh it's been a rough half an hour but uh i'm feeling good feeling okay yeah it's all coming together loud and clear crystal clear oh so happy and um uh should we get to know us? Sure. Get to know us. Rebecca. Hello.

Welcome to the show. Thank you so much. It's really nice to be here, finally. Was that a cough? You mean finally, like finally to be invited or finally after half an hour of setting up i mean it both ways no okay both ways why would uh why do you think you would have been invited earlier see this is dave this is why people say you're mean welcome to the show rebecca you piece of shit. I am a Canadian comedy legend.

That's true. That is Wayne and Schuster. Rebecca Kohler. Jim Carrey. Jim Carrey. Those are the big. That's the Mount Rushmore of Canadian comedy. That's right.

But anyway, please talk. Yeah. Technical thing. Could you turn your mic down a little bit like you did before? So bossy. So just move away from it a bit or actually is that better yeah that's fine you were just coming through a little hot I feel you I've heard that my whole life that's true that's yeah we when you take the stage it's take no prisoners with Rebeccaohler yeah it's hot girl summer but just with the microphone levels you're oh yeah are you gonna have a hot girl summer what's

what's your plan for summer uh you know i've seen this hot girl summer thing trending uh so i'm hip enough to know it's trending not hip enough to really know what it means i'm not sure either i just know white boy summer yeah and uh that's not the name of a hip-hop guy but it would be good white boy summer and good name is that some kind of um racist thing or is it like i picture white boy summer i picture like uh awkwardly colored swim trunks, white legs, flip flops. Yeah. A Miller Lite t-shirt. Yes.

You're nailing it. Yeah. White Boy Summer was, it was Chet Hanks, Tom Hanks' son, came up with these rules. These are the rules that you have to follow to be a white boy in the summer. And it was like, no, the only one I remember was no more calling chicks smoke shows. Okay. Yeah. That's,

uh, what are we, well, what are you supposed to call people now? I know. I think I would, you know, this is a complicated time in,

in society. Um, and men aren't supposed to say those things anymore, but I wouldn't mind you know sure right what about calling a woman a side piece how about that so that's still no so that um that's actually a little insulting um smoke show just means you're hot right right side piece means uh no one has respect for you right yeah you're right they're two opposite ends of the spectrum um what uh what i don't think i've been

called a smoke show not not this year what do you think graham what is the like nicest noun someone's used for you the nicest noun if someone was like if you found out someone called you a uh like a hunk you'd be like hey that's great yeah no one's called me a hunk i'm sure so i think i think you know anything like beefsteak sounds good to me um yeah like T-Bone or somebody said that I was hulking yeah what about you Rebecca if you had to sum up

in one compliment what would it be you know I'm not sure if it is a compliment but once I did stand up in Kitchener Ontario and I had a pretty good show I I'll admit it. And then Jack, it was a smoke show.

And then Jack, the manager, was in the bathroom after my set and he overheard two guys talking. And one of them said, that chick was pretty funny. And the other guy said, yeah. And she looks like she could crack a walnut with her bird.

With her bird. That's like something out of lock, stock and two smoking barrels. I don't know if it was a pro or a con, but it's one of my favorite things ever been said about me after a show. In this context, a bird is. I imagine it's my pants area yeah the lower pants area lower the lower pants is the ankle with my ankles i've never heard that word i get the for the bird the bird is the word

i've never heard the bird is a word in that word way. Me neither. And that's what was so delightful about it. Yeah. Local vagina slang. Yeah. Kitchener, Waterloo. And I guess, like, I think he meant it in a nice way. Because they were like, yeah, she was funny. Yeah.

And she could crack a walnut with her bird. So that's probably the best compliment. That's really good. Because it's the double one. You get that you're really funny and also that you look like you can take care of business. Absolutely no like I've never gotten that

compliment. Dave, I think you're very funny and I think your wiener could crack a walnut. Well, thank you. Let's start with just like could I maybe fit a pine nut in the people and he looks like he could fit a pine nut in his pee hole his bird hole but i guess you know in this case it would be overhearing in the ladies bathroom i'm

in it so and you know he was so funny and you know what it kind of looks like he could fit a pine nut in his pee hole and i can tell from here oh man um now you you're an accomplished stand-up comedian you've traveled all over the place are you you're down in los angeles are you doing stand-up now or are the places still closed or what's happening oh you guys um the stand-up thing here is really complicated um especially obviously after the pandemic i did my first set uh of 15 years uh sorry of 15 months okay yeah i was like hey you and Kitchener 15 years ago, 2006.

Well, yeah. Back then your bird was real strong. It was extra strong. I was younger. Um, my bird has weakened. Uh,

so. No, uh, no, 15 months. I hadn't done standup. They'll actually, the last place I did stand up.

Guess where? Vancouver, British Columbia. Oh yeah. Yuck.up. Actually, the last place I did stand-up, guess where? Vancouver, British Columbia. Yuck Yucks. And I recorded an album. And you probably were the last one. Yuck Yucks is done. What? Yeah. Since when? Since kind of, I think

it was checking out at the beginning of the pandemic, but I think Yeah, I forget things that went out of business a year ago yeah yeah yeah i couldn't imagine a world where i would ever go back outside yes that's right of course everything's closed yeah i know what you mean you're just presuming you'll go outside like dorothy and everything will be open and more colorful um but that's too bad because i I really enjoyed that club of, for a yuck.

Yucks. Zingo. Zango. Am I right? Um, but yeah, the last time I did stand up was, uh,

February something, 2020. And yeah, so I, I, to be honest, you guys, I was kind of like during the pandemic,

I didn't do any zoom shows. I was like, no, thank you that sounds awful oh it is yeah yeah yeah i mean zooming in general sucks so i don't know why like anyway and zoomers suck if you know if you've met any zoomers they suck too are they old people who zoom uh they're they but they zoom around they're not zooming it's like a name of a magazine and it's kind of a thing like boomers call each other to make them feel like zoomers yeah zoomers i

think it's cute i remember when the magazine came out it was like i remember wayne gresky was on the first issue spread eagle the magazine was founded by moses zimer, the guy behind Much Music. I remember him. Zneimer Zoomer. But I think Generation Z has taken over the mantle of the word Zoomer. Because boomers are already boomers. They can't be both. But the magazine is talking about boomers.

Or are they well yeah that was the magazine started before literally that generations that had been born so can i was it a magazine for people born in the 40s yeah it was like 40s 50s and 60s it was for like uh it was like smug you know uh middle-aged white people at the time yeah you're wayne gretzky ben gay commercials yeah it was like hey brian adams is the best we got the uh one time i was in a doctor's office waiting room and i picked up zoomer magazine and Jan Arden post naked at Zoomer magazine. Come on. I'm telling you. Yeah. Not like,

not like full frontal, but like lying down. But yeah, naked. Did she have a dog with her? Uh, no. Why should she?

Uh, I did a recording of because news with her once and, the CBC building wouldn't let her in with her dog and she said i won't do the show without my dog and uh not without my doctor not without my dog so did uh did she not do the show they let it in yeah she's jan freaking art yeah man she was very funny actually very quick-witted woman yeah she's uh she used to one of her backup singers lived on my street when i was uh growing up in calgary so she was always just in my neighborhood just like really yeah i was just always seeing jan arden around that's so canadian yeah it. It was very wholesome, very Canadian. Were there any members of the Holly Cole trio around?

Yeah, and Don Messner lived just a couple blocks away. Wild strawberries hanging out at the Tim Hortons. Yeah, rhymes with orange. Moxie Fruvis. Moxie Fruvis. Oh, my God. This morning when I woke up, I couldn't get a moxie fruvis song out of my head which one king of spain bow bow bow bow bow

rebecca what's your favorite moxie fruvis jam well it's funny uh i was just thinking i remember i don't i'm not very familiar with um the date right band but uh they weren't all well we'll see no i'm good but i remember in like the late 90s i was watching a much music very late at night and a moxie fruvis song came on and i think they were dressed as clowns in the video yeah and i was like this song is amazing but it was the 90s. And then I never saw the video again. And in those days, there was no Google. Right.

So I never found out what the song was. And now they were talking about it. After this, I'm going to Google Moxie Fruvis. I think Dave's Googling it as we speak. No, I don't. I can't. What am I looking up? Moxie Fruvis clown?

Clown video? Yeah. Clown hat something. I'll find it later. I'll share it on Twitter. Everyone will be pleased. No. And for anybody maybe stateside that don't know this story,

one of the members of this band was taken to court over sexual allegations. Yeah, he became a famous interviewer and then was a bad guy. Yeah. And he was me too. Or as in Canada, we say, well, oh,

seed. Yes. Thank you. I don't think he was me too. I think, I think he, it was criminal. Like it was like,

it was beyond like just being outed on Twitter. Yeah, that's true. Oh, that's an interesting kind of hair splitting. And I don't mean that be like, are you splitting hairs, Dave? But it probably sounds like that anyway. No, it's interesting. I've never thought about kind of I just when I say me too. I mean, he did something bad to women and I use it.

Yeah, sure. Also the word to say a man was me too. It makes him sound like the victim. He's the victim. When usually it's because he's a predator. Interesting. So he meets. Not to be splitting hairs, not to be mansplaining me too.

Well, now we're, oh, oh that was gonna be a bad joke but uh yeah so you should say he me too to someone no i think he uh you know i forget what the exact charges were yeah i think he did some bad stuff yeah and it was criminal criminal charges did he get off he did yeah he did because the witnesses all they kind of made boo-boos i don't like i don't know the ins and outs of it but i know that yeah don't blame the witness you're a real witness blamer yeah he got he got away but i what i wanted to say yes is we were talking about moxie fruvis who are a busker band oh yeah that's right they started as a busker band canada had a real rash in the early 90s mid 90s of dorky busker pop folk totally yeah between bare naked ladies uh and crash test

dummies and moxie fruvis let's not forget the moffitts the moffitts weren't dorky buskers they were heartthrobs no no no no i saw thems the moffitts weren't dorky buskers they were heart throbs no no no no i saw them in victoria and they were they were dorky buskers no no it's a different genre wait what is busking mean does it like i know what busking is i remember busker festival um but does it mean that they started as buskers or was it a type of music started as buskers i don't yeah i wouldn't say i don't think crash has dummies as buskers or was it a type of music started as buskers i don't yeah i wouldn't say i don't think precious dummies were buskers but they're they feel that way well and then okay two more well one question and i'd like to get back to precious dummies okay yeah um

but uh do americans know what busking is like is that a term here too do you think i oh that's a good question like is it just street performance street performers but i think i don't think that's i'm gonna ask i've only i've only thought about that right now that that might be a regional uh saying busking i feel like i've never heard the word here that's it. It just dawned on me. But I really haven't heard it outside of, boy, like, yeah. Our entire country? Well, like, I don't know, but I don't hear it. Like, if a guy's playing guitar on the street, I don't think of him as busking.

I think you have to, like, go to a tourist trap to busk. Yeah, I think of him as, yeah. I think of all guitar players on the street as buskers. I think of them all as Ed Sheeran. That's how I see all of them on the street as buskers. I think of them all as Ed Sheeran. That's how I see all of them on the street. He slept on the street, I think. I don't know if he slept on the street. He slept with the street.

Yeah, he got me too'd by the street. This sidewalk is inappropriate. You were going to say something about the crash oh i gotta tell you so i love the crash that well i really love their first album i also and by the way with with all these bands when i'm calling them dorky that is objective i'm not it's not a criticism these are dorky men yes uh and no and one woman and oh sure that's true uh but um yeah i like also they're very they're hunky and they can uh they're not that hunky i don't think they would be like we're honks or sorry we're honks he has such a deep voice but i don't mean it as a criticism i mean like

this is a type of guy and this is a type of music. Look, the Crash Test Dummies are so Canadian. How Canadian are they? They're so Canadian. When their guitar breaks, maple syrup comes out. There you go. You got it. I am also a fan of Crash Test Dummies and their first album. Yes.

And that I can't listen. Like, I haven't listened to any of their other albums, but I only want to hear that one out. Oh, I think it's so good. Their cover of androgynous and their cover of Peter pumpkin head. And that is the catalog. I celebrate.

Who wrote the original androgynous? Can't remember, but it's, it's sorrow gold. Yeah, it's very good. Is that Australian? Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. We're working on our accents. My mom's Australian, Sar. Is she? I've got an advantage. That wasn't very good, the advantage. That was really good. Are you kidding me?

Yeah, but my mother is Australian. Androgynous was the replacements. And Peter Pumpkinhead was xtc yeah that's right xtc yeah hold on a sec this might be awkward i'm just trying to open a bottle of water without disseminate or um inseminating inseminating myself i can't open it okay go on i just want to ask about your mom does she uh she lives in canada i assume yeah so she married my father about 50 years ago um 51 years this august and uh they met in australia where my dad was posted he was a postman he was a postman and he was sent in an envelope uh to work in australia no he was he used to be a

canadian diplomat and oh yeah so his first posting was sydney australia and my mother was australian and she worked in the canadian high commission or did he ever have diplomatic community uh he would uh did he ever kill kill a guy uh just like a couple but actually he got off like not because of the diplomatic immunity it it was he had a good lawyer sure yeah and the witnesses kind of you know they not to witness things up they screwed things up also did your dad have an excess of uh gifts that he received for being a diplomat in the countries he was in because that seems to be i know one person who is a diplomat he's got like a million chinese things because he's he was diplomat to china so does your dad have like a golden boomerang or something like that we well it's funny you say golden boomerang um i do have uh a kangaroo skin here in my room uh in my

bedroom uh that was given to him by um an aboriginal uh person in australia um but it's very it's very touchy with the gifts because especially the canadian government they're very strict you're not supposed to because they could be perceived as bribes oh sure so i think often what they do is they accept the gift and then like they put it in a storage room like i don't know what like they have to like turn the gift in our yeah that's yes stephen harper in an interview said that he's got like several warehouses full of stuff that was given to him because everything he went to they'd be like you know here's the barbecue set that's uh popular in our town exactly

in canada yeah yeah yeah that's not diplomatic that's just if you were going to bribe an official what gift would you give them and it can be from anywhere in the world what gift would you that doesn't have to be something you have and can afford no no it's just anything a really really good knife oh really like a sharp knife or like a folding butterfly or no no like a good knife for your kitchen like a real like i think and in fact i give people here in in los angeles uh know me uh well five people and uh who knows you so i do this thing my uncle gave me a knife for christmas it's like an eight dollar knife and i was kind of like thanks for the eight dollar knife but then it was the best fucking knife i've ever used in my life and

i proceeded to i i have like a drawer full of them so every time i'm going to a birthday party or somebody's house i bring one of these knives everybody loves it nice anyway good night tell me about the knife yeah what so tell us about how why is it so? It's so it's serrated. Yeah. Um, it's lightweight. It's so sharp. So you could, it cuts a tomato like butter. Yeah. What's the,

what's the make and model. Fuck. I would get up to get it. Oh, don't worry. Yeah. Get up at the break and then we'll, we'll,

yeah, we'll all start buying knives. Cause I, I have, um, I think it's Victorinox. I have, I was about to say, I have a set of Victorinox serrated knives that I love that come in. They have like an orange, yellow, pink, and green.

Yes, that's them! That's the knife! And it's... Because we had these like sharp... Oh boy, what's the brand? Kunricone? like sharp oh boy what's the brand coon raccoon uh my wife abby is from switzerland and they get a lot of like like the the swiss brand of everything is like the best yes right i'm familiar with switzerland but like it's also when you live in switzerland it's also like

just stuff you can get with your grocery store points it's like a target item yeah you can get with your grocery store points. It's like a Target item. Yeah, you just get like a set of whatever. Rolexes. Is that where Rolexes come from? Sweden? Yeah. Okay. Switzerland. Switzerland, sorry.

But yeah, so we had these non-serrated knives and I was like, you know what? I could really use a serrated knife. And I bought this set and I love them so much. I bought the set again. I have eight of these knives for just, they're great for cutting. I mean,

tomatoes, obviously tomatoes are the serrated dream. Yes. And then when you go to subway, I'm pretty sure those are the knives they use. I want to, I want everybody out there listening to know I haven't seen Dave this excited

in almost a year. Him describing these knives. He is over the moon. I mean, the fact that we are knife buddies. I've never met Rebecca and now we're knife pals? And nobody else I know, like everybody I give the knife to is thrilled by it. But nobody else I know

is like, oh yeah, I know that knife. So this is really exciting this is huge i uh uh you know you're not supposed to give knives as wedding gifts how come bad luck oops go on did you throw it at them like the bouquet i just know when we got married it's gonna be 10 years this august holy shit bravo uh and uh they uh i remember registering and we were we were told like don't register for knives because they're bad luck oh and that was like somebody at sears was telling you about no i think someone else someone else like Sears, the Bay didn't care. Oh, that's what I thought. It was like the Bay. Like, don't buy us.

Look, man, we won't sell you a knife because it's bad. You, Rebecca, believe in luck. Oh, that's a great question. Take your time. Well, yeah, I'm like, I like, I like don't know how to be on a podcast. You asked me a question. Then like 10 minutes later, I'm like, well, um, I, uh, it's a, it's kind of a philosophical question.

Sure. Um, because you could just say that an event is luck. Um, no, I, I mean, I mean mean in the superstitious way yeah you know it's funny i'm mildly superstitious but but that's i think just to um keep my anxiety in check i think ultimately i don't really believe in luck yeah right uh dave luck bad boy uh no not in the sense of like the way that like you know uh uh you know an athlete needs to wear his lucky underwear or whatever yeah like there's no luck in objects or like you get on rolls sure get you know you you have lucky days and you don't and never the twang show meet i guess i mean i definitely will say like oh i've had a string of bad luck and i will

stand by that statement but when i say it uh i i don't have any kind of fantastical or supernatural attachment to it. But like, do you do anything like knock on wood or if you spill salt, throw this all over your shoulder, you do anything like that? I do knock on wood, actually. Yeah, me too. Yeah, I knock on wood and I do throw salt over my shoulder. So maybe I believe, I don't know. Yeah, I feel like those are the one and two most common of the salt

but the salt is it that's because i don't want the devil to enter my body that's right although i do want the devil to enter my body yeah ever since i saw that um montero video i didn't see that i didn't see it either but i'm just wondering who montero is no montero is the name of the song uh who did old town road oh billy said no a little nas x little nas x he did that video where he's laugh dancing on the devil oh yes i do want the devil to enter yes now i see that was a long road uh an old town road, yeah, you think the most common luck things are throwing salt and knocking wood. What about, I mean, not breaking mirrors. That's probably like every day.

People go years without breaking mirrors. Yeah, I know. I'd say I'm more likely to not break a mirror than knock on wood. I think, yeah, I've broken a couple mirrors but i don't want to pick your argument apart but uh breaking a mirror you know it it's not it doesn't happen easily that's true it's it's not something you would choose to do. And I know that was your point. Yeah. The other day I was walking with my six-year-old and she was not stepping on the cracks.

And I told her, you know, there's a saying, step on a crack, break your mother's back. Now whip it, whip it good. and I was trying to explain to her like superstition you were trying to explain Devo to your child you see it's that's for the evolution so they wear flower pots on their heads yeah and they whip like a cigarette out of a woman's mouth

but it's on a cigarette holder okay a cigarette holder is like okay imagine like uh the great gatsby telephone a telephone with a rotary yes yeah what's the last like phone booth that you can remember using like an old-timey phone booth when was the last one that you can remember that's really sad i can't remember because i didn't realize you know like it was going away yeah if i knew i would have you know hugged the phone kissed it something you know said goodbye taking a photograph yeah definitely kiss a public yeah phone i remember in like 2002

there were i bought this uh q magazine. Q is a British music magazine. All I know is zoomer. That's the only thing I know. No one cares to know. And there was like a page that was just a bunch of paparazzi pictures of Jarvis Cocker, the lead singer of pulp who went into a phone booth, but it was like a turn of this turn of the millennium phone booth that had

maybe some kind of internet box on it oh yeah and it was like what's he doing what's the deal with jarvis cocker using this device what year was that i want to say 2002 okay and wait was it supposed to look super cool like look in some telephone booths there are computers and you can reach the internet like was it supposed to look super cool like look in some telephone booths there are computers and you can reach the internet like was it like no i think it was like these i think it was like these things have been introduced in england we know they're garbage why is he using them gotcha yes yeah right and uh in england especially in london uh the phone booths that you go in are a depository for porno flyers and urine and urine absolutely i won't i won't discount the urine but yeah

definitely porno flyers really yeah because in canada we i don't think we had the booths for forever we had like a kind of a covered phone but getting in a phone booth i don't think i ever did that in my life except oh i did i remember bell telephone booths well they had swinging doors oh yes i used many many many of those how long would you stay on a public phone just like to check in with somebody or would you have actual conversations i i mean i have had actual conversations um especially like when i went to university montreal um we still had landlines i would have called my roommate from the pay phone yeah the guy was seeing or whatever i'm at a pay phone trying to call home no what is this what are you singing now five hey how you doing remember that one no i don't and i refuse to learn uh i'd like to move on um yeah dave uh what's your telephone

story yeah tell us your phone booth story i don't know uh but i do remember once being, I think as a teenager, being on a payphone and just like kind of like holding the phone and being on the call and having, you know, fidgeting with the cord in my other hand. And an old man coming up to me, a scary old man, just walking up to me and saying don't kink the cord he was so concerned about that cord he didn't yeah he must have been uh like a phone empath i want to be that guy to some kid i want to be like you're not far yeah exactly like i want some kid to be like i was running through the sprinkler and this old man came up and said stop it you'll kill your dad it was very much in a like a thinner i love the movie movie thinner side note yeah yes what do you love about it let's let's talk about thinner yeah. Yeah. Oh, okay.

I remember past guest Nikki Glaser also loved it. Really? Well, I like her. And then you and I like Knives. So everything's coming together. Everything is coming together. So I don't know. It's creepy.

I just recently rewatched it. I think there's something. I like movies where somebody has something that's slowly happening to them. Okay. And every time they look in the mirror and I like the idea that they're, they're in, they're trying to be in denial about it. Um, but they know something's really wrong.

And the fly. Have you ever seen the fly? Oh, don't get me started. Jeff Goldblum! What slowly happens to him in that? Oh, you silly Billy! He turns into a dragon!

No, that when Geena Davis cuts those hairs from his back and then tests them, and she's like, the lab came back, they tested to be the hairs from his back. Yes. And then tests them. And she's like, the lab came back. They tested to be the hairs of a fly. There's a point where he's... The lab. Well, they've got a database of every hair.

That one's so creepy when he vomits on the donuts. Oh, I just love that movie. Let's see how Brunderfly eats or whatever he says yes but like he pulls off his fingernails at some point it's so gross teeth and his skin i've never seen it i might watch that tonight i might re-watch that david cronenberg yeah he gets thinner it's a whole genre called body horror body is that true that is true yeah like if you if you look for certain like on certain review sites they instead of just saying gore they say body horror which means somebody's falling apart or something gross happens or a person turns to slime or

something like that so i'm gonna also google that because that that is my favorite i remember there's another movie i saw when i was a kid and I don't think I've been able to find it again. It's called The Believers. Okay. And long story short, somebody curses this woman's makeup, like her compact, and then she puts the makeup on her face

and then she starts developing this zit and it's like really big and it's like ruining her day. And then finally she's like looking at it and playing with it and spiders start crawling out of her face it's amazing uh that's incredible and i love hearing about it and what is it called the believers i think it's the believers yeah i'm gonna track uh yeah yeah let's track that down. My favorite body horror is probably that movie Humane Centipede. Oh, I love that movie.

I love how humane the centipede is. I was going to say. But he wasn't very humane. See, I'm so earnest. I'm a comedian, but I'm like, actually, nobody breaks mirrors. Also, it's not humane what he does uh inside your joke title um have you seen human sent a human centipede i did i saw a human centipede because because it's too crazy a movie not to see you know what i mean i agree i agree disagree disagree just like as soon as i

heard the premise i was like okay i will watch the original I will not watch any sequels but it was like the purge like everybody knows the phrase the purge now you got to see the purge but I haven't seen the purge and but it's it's like such a succinct idea for a movie yeah oh

I don't need to see it I I used to think about I think I tried this on stage a couple times i'm not gonna pretend i haven't okay not running jokes by you but imagine being the center human centipede actor human centipede oh that's good that is good that was a joke though so you don't like yeah that that is like it's not i don't honestly think he's a human centipede no but that was one of the best play play on words i've heard uh past 22 hours sure uh no it's really good but imagine being that woman and your agent's like

i have this part for you is it a speaking role no well you'll kind of you'll mumble at a point yeah is it a shitting role you you will try to talk and uh anyways it doesn't matter what you say someone will be uh shitting in your mouth and you'll be shitting in someone else's mouth and you know that's that's a challenging that's a challenging role um and also but okay, if you want to get to know me, here's what bothered me about the human centipede. Okay. Let's hear it. Two of those women,

their, their mouths are sewn to anuses. Yeah. And yet there are these scenes where they're crying and the crying is vocal. It's not just through the nose. And I was like, but that's impossible because her lips are sewn to that anus. Wow.

And that kind of thing will set me off in a movie. I'll be like, well, I can't watch this movie's lost all credibility. Oh yeah. Is her mouth sewn to the anus or not? And two of those women are farting and it's impossible yeah it's uh when one of them are blowing up like a balloon because shut up i hate this i hate this so much now uh dave what's going

on with you man um i mean not as exciting as a human centipede very few things are that that's not a metric you should compare yourself against is that does anyone make it out alive in human centipede yeah i think don't the women all make it out don't they i think or do they but do they wish they were dead i was just gonna say i think they make it out but they're not happy about it well it's like it's like the movie Alive. They're going to have to explain this thing over and over again to people. At every dinner party. So tell me, so you were part of a human centipede. Is that true?

Yeah, when they do like Never Have I Ever. They win. It kind of tasted like chicken. Dave, what's going on? What's going on with me is so the house next to us, we knew it was going to get torn down because the tenants all moved out. And they, like, you know, over the past few weeks, people have been going in and like ripping stuff out, you know, over the past few weeks, people have been going in and, like, ripping stuff out, you know, whatever.

You need to, like, recycle a certain amount of your house if you want to tear it down. Okay. I didn't know that. Which I only know because I, uh, you can Google or you can look up, uh, you search by your city and like, or by in Vancouver. Anyway, you can search by address and find out what permits they've applied for. So they had applied for abatement and, uh, then, then demolition. But today, this morning, a giant excavator showed up and started tearing down this house. Yeah. And man, oh man. It's pretty satisfying. It was very, it's so satisfying to watch because the guy running the machine was so good.

Like he's got to make sure that the house collapses inward and that's a competitive field because a lot of people want to tear down houses using a giant machine well a couple days ago uh there was a broken window in the house and i was like oh that would be pretty fun to throw a rock and break the window it is like like a kid in a like horror movie in in the 80s yes and i think that's why i didn't i was like uh but uh i might get in trouble i regret not doing it because all the windows are gone now see and what is that going to be so loud for you for the next like eight months yeah probably yeah but what i don't do anything involving audio around here so the we we just like stared out the window for an hour at this guy this like virtuoso with an excavator like yes he would it's like a dinosaur mouth yeah

pulling down the chimney and then but like but delicately like gumming the chimney and pulling it down. And then, and then just delicately like this giant hand pulls out a cable and places it far away. And then, then it just crunches down everything that's been torn down already and it's like so it's like when you walk on like a dried out pine cone that sound of just like crinkling yeah yeah oh so fun to watch a ton of powder got just like went up into the air and i was like oh i bet but we're gonna get the house lung yeah yeah you guys better get some swiffers multiple swimmers that's gonna be a lot that's gonna start settling yeah well it was it's we had our windows closed so i think we're good for today it was really rainy too so

i don't know if that how that helps that'll settle that down yeah because there was a guy whose whole job seemed to just be to spray it with a hose not a hose holder not a big hose just like the tiniest spray of water on a gigantic house coming down i've been lucky to see a couple demolitions in the last let's say the last four months i've seen some pretty good demos and uh they are great they're very satisfying to watch the last four months. I've seen some pretty good demos, and they are great. They're very satisfying to watch. How about you, Rebecca? You've seen any good demos?

I was just thinking, I was like, you've seen how many demos in four months? I've seen zero in my life. Oh, well, we live in Vancouver, where if someone sells a house that's over 10 years old, well, there's no sense in moving into that one. It's trash. I see. I see. I see.

Yes. It is a real estate boom town. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. But yeah, if you've never seen one, you need to see one before you die because they're great. Maybe that's how I'll choose to die. Oh, yeah.

That's a good call. Put myself in a building and then say, take it down. I'm going with it. Unfortunately, I think you would probably just get really hurt. Yeah. Oh, God. Like, no offense, but I think it wouldn't kill you. With the power of your bird.

My bird would protect me yeah imagine your bird could probably crush a house imagine i flew out of there with those feathers is that body horror that metaphor you could take in a bunch of ways and i'll just let it sit out there um so i may i have to think i've made dave uncomfortable no go on it's just my face um there i uh a few weeks ago a guy i was in my garden gardening love love dirt dave's dave's a new green thumb he's oh i'm trying to be one i anyway we'll talk go on have you tried the victorinox knives for plants yeah if you use them on the plants they die yeah it's tricky it's tricky you got to be careful um but a guy was like what's happening with this house next door and i was

like yeah i think they're tearing it down and he was like unbelievable this was a hundred year old house that had not been taken care of. Yeah. But I was like, okay. I definitely. Not really. Not that unbelievable. I kind of believe it. I've found myself on more than one occasion going into one of those houses before it gets torn down.

Oh, really? You jump the fence? I jump the fence. It's really easy. Most times there's an open door that you can walk through. Especially houses where they're moving, they're keeping the house, but they're redoing all the, like, they just kept the frame and you can go under it. Oh, fun. Good fun.

And it's such a thrill to have sex in those houses. Absolutely. That's the only way I'll do it. Crash your car into it. There's a shiv in my behind. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Oh, a couple of days ago, like, because they were moving so slow at just the abatement and just like a guy would come in for two hours, you know, you'd hear a saw going and

then he'd leave and then someone would come back four days later. Like it was very unclear how close they were to tearing this house down now also unclear is what does abatement mean abatement means they they take out like they they had they filled a dumpster with just drywall okay oh so it's like this stuff has to be disposed of in a certain way oh okay for the city to sign off is abatement related to the word rebate wait no i'm not even kidding because isn't it some form of like turning something in maybe i don't know i was wondering if it was involved with related to jason bateman yes I know you were worried about that.

It's unclear the root and... Sure. Origin of the word, the etymology. Can you use it in a sentence, please? But I... Yeah, but they were leaving the... The people tearing it down were leaving the door open. And I was like, well, they're just asking for squatters or rats yeah more likely rats i mean just asking for rats although i like that your first thought was

oh boy the squatters are gonna come in here in a pack yeah i mean wouldn't you i guess like yes if you were if you needed a place to live and this place had its door wide open and nobody living there if there was a floor yes but if they during the abatement they tore out all the floor oh you're so high class you need a floor yes i'm high class i uh put a napkin on when i'm in a human centipede i am wait where do you put it between your mouth and the anus yeah tuck it into my shirt collar like i'm at a barbecue joint um i actually live up the street from a property that was recently demolished but i didn't see it happen right well pixar didn't happen too true um but it was there like i've lived here for five years and it

was there for four of those five years and like it was abandoned and there were like 15 people living in there oh wow and um they would get up to stuff like you would see a cord coming from the house and they would plug it into the they would would like Jimmy, the bottom of a light post. I wish someone would Jimmy my bottom stuff. Like they were really clever. And like, at first when I moved there, moved here,

I was like, Oh, that house gives me the, you know, the creeps. And then I was like, what are they up to tonight? You know,

like I was so impressed. Like people just make do the way they've got to make do. I think they had a tv in there because i would see the flickering light so anyway and then eventually they were all kicked out demolished i i uh had a similar thing i saw a guy who uh it was very obvious he had stolen a backpack but uh he was he went to go plug something in he knew where there was just a plug that like the public could access. It was just like under a bleacher. And just went straight to it.

Yeah. He will. He knew he had the street knowledge and which now I also have, I'm going to pass it on to my grandkids. Yeah. You know, should they survive their human centipede situation? Also by then I made it more gross than it could possibly be i was like you don't even have kids how do you

have grandkids oh they're in a human centipede already that's how they'll be born yes yeah okay i won't go there but um uh they say that uh electricity could one day be cordless what yes yeah really i've read an article and it will just come through your fingers that's yeah i don't really understand how we won't all just be like ow ow ow ow everywhere we walk i i think my uh we got my dad uh like a wireless charger, like a charging mat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know how those work. I'm afraid of them, but I'm willing to let my dad have one.

Totally. You're willing to let your dad be a guinea pig for you? And he loves it. He says it's great. It keeps his coffee warm. Yeah. No, you're right. This is a precursor to what's going down,

right? It's the gateway, gateway mat to the cordless electricity. But also, yeah, I remember similarly, I was sitting on a patio of a coffee shop last year, but sometime before the pandemic.

And somebody asked the coffee shop owner like um where's the plug out here and they said oh there's no plug outside and she was appalled and you know visually disgusted yeah i was like we're outside like i get it we all have a laptop but like i don't know something about it really depressed me that she felt entitled to electricity yeah and that it was so appalling outdoor electricity yeah yeah when i there was years and years ago we did dave and i did a show in toronto and i stayed in an rv that i found on airbnb and before And before the electricity hadn't been turned on, somebody had to come and turn it on.

So I was just walking through Toronto with a phone that was dying and no access to electricity. Because where do you find it? If you go into a place and say, can I plug in my phone? They're going to say, no, you absolutely cannot. So yeah, finding electricity is like, whew. Right, Gary? Another story from kitchener it's very brief but uh another time yeah okay i was there and uh some kid was like he he needed a charger for his phone and we were you know it is the new fire it's quest for fire

when your phone is dead yeah oh yeah and then when it goes dead you're what are you gonna do like unless you got a book you're screwed you freeze you wake up like the shining where you've just been freezing all night and uh and you've had to think your thoughts because your phone was dead so dave this mat you just throw your electricity things on it and it just soaks it up? I assume. I haven't seen the mat. My siblings and I bought it together. I gave my sister some money. Nice. You know what? Maybe I even owe them money. We got them a mat. I don't know. He loves it. But have you ever...

I had a phone that just wouldn't stay charged. And so I went on a trip last, I think the last trip I went on in 2019 and brought one of those, um, power banks, like portable battery. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, love it. Yeah. And, and, you know, it's exciting cause it could catch on fire in your pocket any minute

at any moment. Oh, it's exciting because it could catch on fire in your pocket any minute. At any moment. I have a thing that you can plug a phone into that's solar power. Huh? Like it's a little solar power thing. You could plug your phone into it and then have a little free electricity. I just went camping and somebody had a portable speaker that was solar powered.

Annoying. There's nothing you can do to them. Yeah. Oh boy. Hope it clouds over. Yeah. Hope it rains here in the desert. I don't want to listen to any more This American Life on this camping trip.

I were a glass in the desert. No thanks. Graham. Yes. What's new with you?ham yes what's new with you here's what's new with me is uh last week we i think it was last week we talked about uh a rod stewart impersonator called really rod was that last really rod yes yeah so last week we talked about this really rod it was um i would regularly see his van with a decal on the back that said really rod and it might have been two weeks ago okay but like anyways this is this is a thing that i've

unearthed in my memory is this really rod existed and so i went to the internet to find out as much as i could about really if you like rod stewart and you want a tribute then you should hire really rod dave that's way better than anything he's ever thought of no i loved it i loved every moment of it but this guy this guy couldn't come up with a jingle like that um so here's okay first things first he his rod stewart haircut is more like uh the like mom from that show that had the like spiky slick down hair and then the spiky at the back what was that john and k plus a yes john and k plus a he has kind of a haircut like that and he's a sweaty man and the two photos I could find of him, he is buckets of sweat. Yeah, well, that's not bad.

No. That's what you want out of a rod. Yeah, I guess that's true. You want a greased up kind of self-cooling rod. And then he doesn't have his website. His domain has been forfeited. And you can buy it for $157 I think or you can buy reallyrod.ca

for $2 Graham I don't want us to be bad mouthing reallyrod this is a guy following his passion absolutely this is a guy that I've become fascinated with fascinated is like

a way you can be sneaky. That's right. Sneaky about bad-mouthing someone. No, not to bad-mouth him at all, but he's... I can't figure out... He only has, as far as I can find online, he only did one gig, and it

was on the website, if you find it, it says this concert was canceled due to lack of ticket sale sales no that's not true that is true you're being you're being a raw job telling a really sad story on this comedy podcast i know but you know what it's real and that's what uh that's what people are it's really raw it's really rod absolutely it's really raw it's really rod but like r-a-w-d because it's raw and and we did get we did get a phone call about really rod yeah um can i play it yes please wake up maggie i think i've got something to say to you here it comes.

I think this is the one. That's as good as Rod Stewart. Shut up. Shut up. Hey, Dave and Graham. This is Liz from New West. I just wanted to tell you that that really Rod guy, the Rod Stewart impersonator, he is also a magician. And he would do table magic at the Christmas christmas and mother's day brunches that my

like dad's side of the family always does with my grandma and stuff um he like comes to the table and like does does close-up magic i just thought you guys might like that detail anyway love you guys bye oh also he's nice oh he's also he's nice oh okay well i'm just fascinated by him is all i also can i say when she first got on she was like um you know that guy really rod um he's actually not really rod this dirty little secret yeah anyway go on well i just i've long been fascinated by uh celebrity impersonators also people who dress up like movie characters and stand in front of the Man's Chinese Theater. Yes. There's a George Michael in town who, during neighborhood days, I saw him perform.

He looks so much like George Michael. Doesn't sound a lot like him, but a lot of it is the theater. You eat with your eyes. Oh, I love it with my eyes. And speaking of eating, after his show, he was parked outside my place

and saw me eat a whole pizza out of the trunk of his car. But if you want to see Really Rod you he's he's uploaded his entire show an hour and a half uh of him performing as rod stewart he's got a whole backing band it's all live and uh and there's an hour and a half video i watched about 45 minutes of it but i'm willing to tuck in we'll put the the last 45 at the end of our episode yes yeah that's only right um yeah and so i did you know i just did a deep dive on really rod and discovered myself at the end of it oh that's really nice yeah it is really nice um but have you guys ever

like have you ever seen live uh oh i guess you saw the george michael guy perform did you yeah i walked past it was outdoors it was outdoors yeah how about you rebecca have you ever seen i'm trying to think i don't think so um no i haven't seen actual in person there was a there i nearly neil the Neil Diamond tribute. Oh, I would love that. He sang Sweet Carolina at a Canucks game, and it ruled. Yeah, I saw him at the casino out in Portland or whatever. Yeah, he rules.

I would love to see a Beatles cover band, and I would love to see a Queen cover band. I was on a show with a Beatles cover band, and they would do two songs and they would come off stage and uh somebody would kind of vamp for them and then they would change eras of clothing wow they would they slowly evolved into like the sergeant pepper i was gonna say dr pepper which is not dedication yeah they were great i mean they sounded great but they had

their wigs weren't great they could have done some better wig work that's i they probably had canadian hairstylist anyway go on i do like the it's fun when they come up with a fun name that's not just like the name of a song i remember there was a kiss cover band called black diamond which is just the name of a song i was hoping hoping you were going to say Smooch. That's even better. Smooch would be great. I feel like there was a ABBA cover band

called Abba Cadabra. That'd be great. Shania Twin is one. Shania Twin rules. Or the Grateful Living. I'd like to see the Grateful Living. Balloon 5. The maroon five cover van who wears inflatable suits

or maroon five I think burgundy six yeah sure the burgundy six yours is better than mine it's fine Dave I don't want us to be like that we just met and burgundy six da da da da da da da da da da da da Dave, I don't want us to be like that. We just met and Burgundy 6

da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da Oh yeah, I love the cantina band. Everybody knows that song. It's great. Everyone knows. What is that song called? I don't know. It's probably called like Free Peanuts or some shit like that.

It's not the Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy because that's the one that goes the Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy because that's the one that goes the Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy. It's like Glenn Miller's best. Yeah, it's Glenn Miller for sure. It is going to be something like Raindrops and Peanuts. I feel like Peanuts is going to be somewhere in the title.

Is it in the mood? Wait. Just a second. Oh, is it a the mood wait just a second oh this is a live version there it is that's in the mood this is part of really rough show this is the opening it's in the mood i would have guessed this was not called that no yeah i would have guessed this was chattanooga choo-choo because that sounds like you're in the mood for like skipping down the street yeah yeah yeah well also isn't there a song that's like i'm in the mood for love simply because you're near me i would have thought that was in the mood yes well that's i'm in the mood for love but what is he's in the mood in the glenn miller in the

mood what are they in the mood for? That's what I mean. Like skipping down the street or like eating Skittles. Like it's making whoopee. Mm-hmm. Yeah. But that's love. Well,

Graham, do you have sex without love? Yeah. Let's discuss that. Never without glove because I was raised that way. Never without. Absolutely. I was talking to a friend of mine the other day female

uh also a comedian and we determined that uh sexual chemistry when you're a woman who is funny um depends heavily on uh the man's sense of humor like the man has to have a good sense of humor like if you are having a good comedic uh clicking chemistry yeah it will determine a good sex oh a good sex oh okay uh uh without that it's bad sign without having just a general camaraderie of being able to kind of joke together it like i mean if you can't joke about the act of sex then uh then you're gonna have a really hard life because it is the dumbest thing you can't joke you can't poke that's right you know glove no love if you can't joke don't poke yeah jokeoke, no poke. Yeah. Yeah. Do you guys want to move on to some overheard?

How about a tiny bit of business? Oh, tiny bit of business. Jumbotron time, everybody. And we've got a heck of a Jumbotron this week. What is the call to action? Let me know. Let me tell you. Don't let me know.

Let me tell you don't let me know let me tell you visit brokenchains.blog to be astounded by what still exists and you don't love me now and you never love me again i can still hear you say go to brokenchains.blog ever wonder what happened to your favorite chain restaurants like Ponderosa, Bonanza, Burger Chef, Burger Chef, Burger Chef, Rax,

Taco Tico, Hot Now, Baker's Square, Mr. Donut, Po' Folks, Ground Round, or GD Ritzies? Dave, can I tell you something? I've never heard of any of these except maybe Bonanza. But I could be thinking of the TV. Burger Chef was on an episode of Mad Men.

Okay, yes. I've heard of Ponderosa and I have wondered what happened to it. Well, believe it or not, they all still exist in some form. And a delightfully obsessive man named Zap Actions Dower. That's a name and a half. Regularly travels to the surviving locations of these mostly defunct restaurant chains and writes about his adventures at a blog called Broken Chains. That's right.

Blogging still exists, too. I love it. This is the only, here's the thing that I was thinking as soon as he said that he goes to them. Have either of you ever been to a Husky restaurant? Never. No. So like forever, forever and ever if you went to a gas station,

Husky gas station, there was a diner attached. Really? And it was for truckers. It was exclusive to your truckers. They would have a shower that you could use in the back and it was like a classic diner and i think there's one left there might be one left in canada what are uh the is there an old chain you enjoy rebecca well like a ponderosa did you guys ever go to a ponderosa no oh it was amazing you'd go i think it was a steakhouse or something and but that they would

give you if you were a kid they would give you like a medallion and then you could put the medallion in this machine and you'd get a prize and it was so exciting um that sounds exciting so great so ponderosa uh and you know i would say saint hubert but there's still a few left especially in Quebec Saint Hubert is like the ground zero for poutine you can still buy the sauce oh I know it's so good

my mother sent me packages of Swiss Chalet gravy nice it's different from Saint Hubert but I like them both for different reasons and sometimes once in a while when I'm a little depressed, I'll make myself a poutine with the Swiss Chalet packets. You can get curds down there in L.A.? No, I'll probably be using kind of a mozzarella. Sure.

But, you know, the gravy, the fries, the cheese. It's all going to happen. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

The what's the other chain there was one called chichis in canada it was a mexican chain oh sure one yeah chichis a celebration of food is how their jingle went um there was one when i uh the local one that i remember i think there's maybe still one or two is bino's what's bino? Beano's is just like a diner chain, like a breakfast place. Like a Denny's style thing that we would go to twice a year after church. Nice. Nice. But I also, when I went to Great Wolf Lodge with my family a few years ago

down the street from Great Wolf Lodge there was a place called Burger Claim which was like a prospector themed burger restaurant which seemed like it would be a chain but I don't know if there's any more yeah no no

there's just regional chains that's the other thing yeah where you go and it's just in that state or province and it doesn't exist anywhere else and like white spot is our our go yeah white spot i've been to a white spot rules or earls earls that's a west coast chain i used to go to earls a lot when i lived in bamf sure you lived in Banff? Just for a few months after high school Banff is my favorite west coast city Are you being serious? Oh right sorry It's west to me

But like my dad lived in Banff For a year and like worked at a hotel And just skied all the time Yeah is that what you did? Yeah except I never Made enough money to go skiing. Oh, because you weren't with a hotel that had like a special pass or whatever? And also it was my first time living alone.

So I didn't know how to, but like it was, you know, it wasn't the best time of my life. Why did you end up in Banff? Are you from the Eastern regions? Go to MaximumFun.org slash Jumbotron to claim your Jumbotron. Do we want to move on to Overheard?

Sure, sure, sure. Overheard. Overheard's a segment of the show where, man oh man, if you hear something funny, don't just save it for yourself and save it for a rainy day send it to us and we'll do it on a rainy day and we always like to start with the guest rebecca do you have an overheard yes a couple years ago here in los angeles i was at a bar

and i there are two women talking and i overheard a woman go oh I cannot stand her and then the other woman said didn't you just post a picture of you and her in a hot tub last week and then the other woman went yeah wow yeah it was the hot tub that made me do it. I can't stand her. Yeah. I do love hot tubs. Yeah. I love her hot tub, but I can't stand her. Yeah. Oh, it's complicated. I wanted, of course, I wanted people to see I was in a hot tub and it would be rude not to have her with me.

Yeah, that's true. I didn't want people to think I was in a hot tub alone. No. Yeah, a hot tub alone is a pretty sad thing. Or that she was alone in the hot tub. I guess I should just post. I thought it really said a lot about our society in that one little back and forth i don't see i mean this is even pre-pandemic but i never i so rarely hang out with people that i never hang

out with people i can't stand i know i we're too old for that i mean i don't even know how old you are but i'm 22 anybody over 12 shouldn't be doing that. Dave's 22. I'm a saucy 27. Yeah. Rebecca, it's rude to ask a lady or I've been told I could play. I've been told I could play nine. There you go. With a hormone disorder.

Oh, yeah. Very gross. Because of his beard. And my boils. Yeah. All those boils. You're like my hormone boils that guy from

How to Get Ahead in Advertising oh yeah don't know it what a freaky movie Richard E. Grant is it body horror? a bit

kind of but it's a comedy he has a boil on his neck and it starts talking to him I haven't heard of body comedy

but I heard of buddy comedies there you go this is kind of a buddy comedy because he's friends with the boy on his neck that tells him how to advertise. It becomes buddy horror. A buddy horror film. Oh, wow. That's weird.

I love it. Yeah. A buddy, a body horror, a body comedy, buddy horror. Yes. Yes. Yeah, that's right. Dave, do you have an overheard? I do. Mine's an overseen i was

in traffic today i love to drive i love to get behind the wheel of a car and just feel the torque juicing me around the torque juicing me around i love the way that the pedals feel i love the squish of the pedal yeah i love the way the steering wheel just whistles around. Oh, boy. I love the spoiler at the back of my car always telling me, Kevin Spacey was dead the whole time.

Dave's on a roll right now. What's this character? Describe the gear shift. Yeah. Ooh, the gear shift. Ooh, it's like, ooh, hey, I'm a manual kind of guy.

Yeah, I'm an old stick to you, right? All right. And it goes, ka-chunk, I've never shifted a gear in my life. What about your bumper? I'm an automatic stick it to you right all right and it goes ka-chunk i've never shifted a gear in my life i'm an automatic man what's what's happening with the bumper oh my bumper is just like oh it's all like scratched up from all the the uh parking i do no describe describe

the little pieces of paper and dust that gets caught in that part around the gear shift oh sure yeah oh the gear shift is like oh put your wendy's receipt in me stick it in deeper anyway i was in traffic my overheard's not gonna be as good as that does that run this one's very cute i um i saw this van this work van and at the bottom of the van I saw that it said caution blind man driving what the and I uh I had to that's the only part that caught my eye and so I had to see what the rest of the van said and it was from the Venetian blind service center yeah yes

at first I just thought it was like A bumper sticker Making a joke And I was like I don't know how I feel about that Yeah it's kind of rude But now that I know it's a blind Man who puts blinds up I'm all for it Context is everything

Did we ever talk about that terrible Aerosmith video for Blind Man Oh yes Yeah that is terrible I haven't seen that I've seen Crazy It's kind of like a body horror terrible Aerosmith video for Blind Man? Oh, yes. Yeah, that is terrible. Okay. Yeah. I haven't seen that. I've seen Crazy. It's kind of like a body horror.

Amazing. Yeah, it's about... Steven Tyler does Blind Face. Everyone in the video was blind. And you can tell because they're wearing sunglasses and they're reading Playboy that's Braille and they're all horny. Shut up. Are you being serious? Yeah.

I think there's a scene with two. I think they're supposed to be lesbians because they're wearing like leather jackets and they go to a taco restaurant and they stick their fingers in the tacos and they're like, it's not. Dave, you describing this is more awful than just watching the video the video is bad but you hearing you describe it I'm not like what uh you can tell I'm not I'm not in favor of it oh I know but it's so gross that's so gross when you describe what they're doing with the taco and I think everyone in the crowd is they're they're like the whole audience of the Aerosmith concert is supposed to be blind and they're waving their canes in the air. Yeah, it's bad.

I mean, look, don't shoot the messenger. Is it a good tune? Yeah. It does. It rocks. Okay. Yeah. I'm going to get that.

I petitioned years ago to get it as our national anthem. Sir, could you describe again what they're doing to the tacos? They're putting their fingers inside a wet meaty taco yes okay just wanted to make sure it might be veggie it could be veggie yeah maybe a bit of tofu or a satan yeah satan um i say satan all right yeah um graham what's your over we go. I was walking down the street. And this is never getting old for me, is people who are having loud conversations holding their phone away. And that's why the conversation has to be loud. They're holding their phone at arm's length, and they're being loud.

And there was a woman walking down the street, young woman, had on a pair of sweats and a pair of lounging around the house kind of slipper things like poofy slipper things that you would in a fancy like in uh you know a scar face like his girlfriend would be lounging in these not like a bunny slipper no not a bunny slipper but like a fluffy kind of sandal and gotcha she was walking and i think i know she was going to the ice cream store because she was talking to her friend and she said they just have one flavor and it fucking sucks

so maybe it was like the only vegan flavor or something oh sure yeah she was this uh this ice cream the only ice cream store that only has one flavor is dairy and it fucking rules yeah yeah it's so good yeah yeah probably it was probably seitan uh yeah the seitan the seitan ice cream yeah um it was great yes Yeah. Satan's Scoop is great. Yes. That would be a cool, it would be like a Rockabilly ice cream store. Yeah, sure. The Reverend Horton Scoop. Oh my God, Reverend Horton Heat, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Wait, is he the guy who sang What song do you think he sang? Trailers for Sailor Rent? No, that was an old timey. What's Reverend Horton Heat? He was like a guy who'd be like, Whoa, it's martini time. Oh, that guy, that guy.

Okay, right, all right. Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. Which everybody has to see them before they die. It's a lot of fun. Have you seen Reverend Horton horton here yeah i saw him at the railway club i want to say oh my gosh that's a tiny venue it was it was like years and years it was after all the swing dancing thing was coming gone so they weren't touring stadiums you know what i mean right are you are either of you guys grateful dead fans did i already ask this no you've asked it like every five minutes for fuck's sakes no i'm not graham no no i'm not uh

i only know the one song which one uh something of gray something touch of gray oh man okay yeah why are you are you a deadhead? Have you followed them around? I've seen them in concert. I saw them in concert a month before Jared Garcia died. Oh, so you got the OG there. I got the OG, but I got the OG. I bought fake acid anyway.

What? Yeah. Some fucking kid sold us fake acid at the grateful dead concert it's so anti-grateful but it's so so when did you realize it was fake acid like an hour in because we were all like yeah i feel something and then finally an hour in we were like this is bullshit right and yeah the kid was like okay it takes about an hour to work, and I'll be across state lines by then. Yeah, it was pretty depressing. But so anyway, this makes my story.

I think I thought maybe Graham. Graham seems like a deadhead. I thought maybe you liked that. No, Graham's only heard Touch of Grey but he loves Touch of Grey absolutely it is a great tune it's a great tune

you made a face though when he said it are there skeletons in the video yes do they put their fingers in a taco

not everybody's a blind man alright saying Touch of Grey is a Grateful Dead song you like it's kind of like saying Kokomo

is your favorite Beach Boys song excuse me what's wrong is my favorite well kokomo is also excellent i mean when you're talking excellent yeah and saying touch of gray is your favorite grateful dead song is like saying beethoven's fifth is your favorite beethoven song and like come on we all know it was his fourth like really um really now i have some overheards sent into us from people all over the map this is gonna be fun this is gonna be fun um if you want to send one in you can send it in to spy at maximum fun dot org we got um before you get started speaking of weird songs. Yes. We got like a few free months of Sirius XM radio. And there's a Beatles station and they play Free as a Bird, their 90s song.

Yeah. Yeah, I know. They play it a lot. Then that has the hidden track. That's like a Kokomo. Yeah, it is kind of. Yeah, it's their Kokomo. It's the Beatles Kok kokomo it was the culmination of that series right it was on tv that my parents maybe watch uh graham you're not too cool for the beatles anthology no i'm not too

cool but i yeah made me watch oh no the good music ouch my ears i stand by my premise that would you like the beatles if you had found them on your own and had just inherited i think absolutely they're fucking it's excellent music it is excellent music but would you have found it on your own if you weren't kind of force fed it i don't i it's it is it is like would I like water? Same. Yeah. And to be honest, I like the Beatles more than water. Yeah.

Dave hates water. He likes a Ribena in his water. Yeah. I would like, I'd rather freeze the Beatles and put them, warm up my, cool down my Coca-Cola. Does that make any sense? Yes. And you know, like they got in trouble for saying they were the next Jesusesus or whatever well i feel like if water said that it would be inappropriate but the beetles could

but the water has more of a connection to jesus than any of them just walked on it he turned it into wine turned into wine um now we have these beetles ever do with water? Exactly. They had a song called Rain. That's true. This comes from Jim from South Portland, Maine. My overheard is of the teen's say variety. While waiting in line for ice cream, I overheard a group of teenage girls talking to one another. They said of the family of another girl not in the group, Why do all their cars smell like bird seed?

That's a very specific smell, bird seed smell. All their cars. Wait, how many people's cars? Can you repeat? I don't know, maybe it's a taxi company, maybe it's Bird Bluebird Taxi. Oh, yeah, yeah.

You get a fleet sales. Yeah, and it's guaranteed one bird in every car. Just flying around loose in the car. I hope it's not my bird. Oh, right. I might kill them. Sure. Why does this bird smell?

Why does this car smell like a crushed walnut? Every time I take one of those taxis, I come home with a broken thumb. those taxis i come home with a broken thumb that sounds like a very borscht belty kind of yeah love no love true um this next one comes from sam in hertford uk my younger brother turns 40 this year but this overheard is from when he was 4 years old and I was 6. We were watching Tom and Jerry, and Tom the cat ran straight into an ironing board, which turned him into an ironing board

shaped cat. My brother said, in a serious tone, ugh, they must have used a stuntman for that. And he adds, this is the ps of this i had my own stuntman ideas when i was about for myself i thought that stunts like people falling off of buildings were performed by old people who wanted to die but they were thoughtful enough to think that they might be entertaining absolutely like those those elderly japanese people who cleaned up the nuclear site.

Oh, my God. Graham, can you read the quote again, but in a young little boy British voice, please? Do your little British Hereford voice. English. English voice. Rather sad in a serious tone. Oh, they must have used the stuntman for that. I don't know. I don't know. They must have used the stuntman for that. I don't know. I don't know what.

They must have used the stuntman for that. There you go. See, you knew that you were going to do it better, and that's why you set me up. A stuntman. I've got to use a stuntman. A stuntman like what? I'm a little boy.

Like the dustman. He's like a stuntman, isn't he? This last one comes from Savina from Arlington, Virginia. I was on my way. Savina from Virginia. Okay. You know what? You should leave.

Eating in her diner. My husband started running again and just came back from a quick run. On his way out of the apartment complex, a woman in her 80s was outside on her phone and a short while later, he was on his way back and the woman, now not on her phone, looked straight at him and explained, well, that wasn't very

long, you pussy. And he said, you know, you're right. And she said, at least you're trying. So, I want to be insulted by an old person in that fashion. That would, I feel it would be an honor. Have you guys ever had an old person tell you off? Oh.

I mean that old man who didn't want me to kink the cord. That's right. Yeah, that's pretty bad. I feel like the thing that's stopping a lot of people from going running is that they can't run for very long and an old person will make fun of them. Yes. Also, like yesterday. It's a pandemic of its own. I was crossing an intersection and a guy fell off his bike and I did exactly what I would hope other people would do and pretended it didn't happen.

Absolutely. So that he could get up and go on with his life. As as he's okay he was okay but uh exactly he said this is fine i'm fine and then i was like okay just pretend that he doesn't exist because this is what he wants well i was talking to my neighbor about that just a few hours ago and we were saying you do a thing where you like kind of pretend you don't see it but you keep them in the corner of your eye until they move right and then if they don't move then you're like hey man yeah i saw everything you must be really embarrassed should i call an ambulance yeah because they're gonna make fun of you too when they get here they're gonna have a big laugh over this when the people were uh tearing down the house next to us uh we were like watching to make sure they

didn't like throw chunks of the house at our house it was a weird kind of like pretending each other weren't there as they were doing it because we were like well they got to tear down this house but we have to look at them yes and they they're gonna be like well they have to look at us yeah but what they're doing rules right that's not falling they're going to be like, well, they have to look at us. Yeah, but what they're doing rules, right? That's not falling. Well, they're doing rules. Although they did like have to pull out a tree trunk that was under the fence and the fence was moving a lot. And they still stuck the landing.

I mean, I haven't checked on the fence. It looked like the fence came apart a little bit. Shit. So is that a fence that you share with them? Yeah, so it was a little bit of like, well, let's see how this turns out. My feeling is new house, new neighbors, new fence.

In addition to overheards that are written in, we also accept your phone calls if you want to call us. Our phone number is 1-844-779-7631. That's one. Ugh. SpyPod 1, like these people have. And you do not need to call in with your Really Rod testimonial. Yes, we already got our fill of Really Rod.

Hey, Dave Graham and guest. I am calling in an overseen. My name is Brandon. I'm from Dracula, California. Dracula. I was leaving the grocery store and on a car in the parking lot, I saw probably the best sticker I've ever seen in my life on the back window. It was in the vein of the Intel Inside logo,

and it just said Mr. Bean inside. Yeah, great. All right. Well, bye. Yes. Yes, absolutely. just said mr bean inside uh yeah great all right well yes yes i love it because it's it wasn't even a pun no it wasn't even a pun and it also is like what's the connection between intel and mr bean mr bean inside i'm gonna google that bumper sticker and maybe purchase it mr being inside yeah absolutely yeah also i think you said temecula and oh not dracula no but or i i guess you're mocking me but um but no i was just in temecula a couple weeks ago visiting matt and julia so it's fresh on my mind you mean the couple from that commercial yeah the mccain's commercial. The French fries. Yeah. The French fries commercial.

Past guest Julia Ladkowitz and her husband Matt O'Brien were in a commercial together. Can't wait to talk about it if we ever have them on the show. Yeah, that's true. We'll have it. It'll be a double barrel show

and we'll hear all about it. Yeah. But for now, shut up. Okay. Fair. Next phone call. I stopped podcasting yourself.

I haven't overheard. I was walking my dog, and I noticed a group of children, maybe 10 years old, were lined up sitting on this little wall at the edge of the park. And I was wondering what game they were playing. So I kind of walked by with my dog, and I heard a, a little boy, like pointing at all the different people sitting down and saying, okay, you're poo, you're pee, you're diarrhea, you're number two, you're half and half. I thought it was fantastic. Anyways, off I go. You're half and half is my favorite. Yeah.

Little bit of column A, a little bit of column B. You're number two how many different words can we figure out for this yeah um i uh i don't know i just i like the bravado of that i know yeah i just like it it's like you know picking teams and you want to be picked last yeah because he's run out of good words for poo well no but i'm also wondering like i was like does he mean like half a solid poo half a diarrhea that's what i thought or is he saying like like half and half is a gross half cream half milk that'll give you diarrhea and it's compared or no it can be compared to one of these i see no half and half half and half rules yeah half and

half i drink it all the time i was just reading that maybe that kid doesn't like it yeah i love it uh i always have a jug of it in case you can't sleep in my fridge i'm a big cream guy i get a gallon well i mean half half and half a gallon. Yeah, half a gallon. Here's your final one. Okay. Hi, Dave Graham, an incredible guest. This is Randy from Chicago calling in with an overheard. I was walking into my apartment building through the laundry room,

and I heard three women talking, and one said to the others, I was just looking at the group chat. Did Chelsea's baby daddy really die? To which the other two started laughing So either they left her out of some sort of inside joke or they're all terrible sadists Either way, off I go Or a third option

the person choosing the phrase baby daddy and maybe that's their first time trying it out You know Baby daddy I gotta say if I overheard that I would maybe that's their first time trying it out you know baby daddy I gotta say if I overheard that I would I'm I would say like I'm sorry what is that situation yeah yeah I would I can be nosy really inappropriately I'm sure it's no surprise to anybody listening but uh yeah I would have gotten to the bottom of that you would have got

in there yeah that is an amazing over here you would have gotten to the bottom of that. You would have got in there. Yeah. That is an amazing over here. You would have gotten to the bottom of that faster than big time than a human centipede. Oh, known for their speed. They get, they get to the bottom. That's true. Known for their proximity to the bottom. It's a,

uh, you know, six legged race. Horrible, horrible, six legged race. Uh huh. Um, yeah, that's great. Uh, thanks everyone for overhearing things. Six-legged race. Horrible, horrible. Six-legged race.

Yeah, that's great. Thanks, everyone, for overhearing things and sending them in. You are the wind in our sails. Rebecca. Yes. That brings us to the end of this here podcast. Well, this has been a blast. Thank you for being our guest.

Thank you for having me, you guys. What a treat. Where can people find you? What are you promoting? What are you doing you doing what's coming up let's just talk about where people can find me yeah um uh promotions are slow at this time i mean whatever i'm working on my own stuff yada yada but uh i'm at uh at reb co r-e-b-k-o-h on instagram. Okay. At Becca underscore Kohler, K O H L E R on Twitter. And I have Rebecca Kohler.com, my website.

You can learn all about me and there are some interesting things. Yeah. Well, do people still go to comedians websites? I have a stat counter and someone's going there. Okay. Yeah. It's a fun thing to have. If you and someone's going there. Okay. Yeah. It's a fun thing to have.

If you, it's not, I don't think it's necessary anymore, but I think they're fun. Yeah. It's yes. I think, well,

I'm not, I'm not, I'm not bad mouthing it. I'm just like, yeah. What is the, especially when there's no like live dates to look up. What I like about it though,

is if somebody is checking out like what I've done, like they don't have to go to IMDB and then also to Twitter. And then all like, IMDB just changed their format on the website. Now it's hard to look at the cast of a movie. It's ridiculous. It's ridiculous. As I've noticed it.

It's very upsetting. Anyway, no, it's been super fun thank you so much for having me I'm sorry it took so long for us to no it was great it all came together why would you apologize to us yeah we didn't book you well thank you again so much for being here

guys I should say I'm gonna plug this weekend coming up, I'm doing another one of those quiz shows. Last show before the summer because it's too hot and people are going to want to get outside, watch movies under the stars. Yeah. Fair, yeah.

But we should do a live, we should do an outdoor Shakespeare, you and I. Yes! Oh, my God. Romeo! Check these, swing on these baby i think doing a live uh well you know what i think a bonus episode has been born oh yeah that's where we just do a 45 minute shakespeare um also if you're a uhumFun.org donor, supporter, whatever, there's going to be a bonus episode coming out soon. So you know what?

There's going to be bonus episodes coming out throughout the year. It's not too late. If you just donate at the $5 level, you'll get them all. There you go. MaximumFun.org slash join. Did you have a place people can go for your quiz show? Oh, yeah. You can go to Eventbr show? Oh yeah, you can go

to eventbrite.quizshow and you know what? It's going to be a hell of a fun time. We've got Chris Locke on the show. Oh, he's so funny. So funny. Well, thank you

everybody out there for listening and being a part of our lovely audience. And, you know, we're in the homestretch of this whole pandemic thing. So hold on. Keep being wonderful and come on back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself. MaximumFun.org Comedy and culture. Artist owned. Audience supported.