Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 729 - Karen O'Keefe
Episode Date: March 8, 2022Comedian Karen O’Keefe returns to talk extra work, Canadian cuisine, and news radio....
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Hi, he's Dave Shumka, and he's Graham Clark, and together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself.
Woo!
Hello, everybody, and welcome to episode number 729 of Stop Podcasting Yourself.
My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who's chewing down on some cookies, Mr. Dave Shumka.
I've been drinking coffee and I've been eating cookies.
Hey guys, we got a pack of rainbow Chips Ahoy.
I was going to say they look like a Chips Ahoy.
Perfectly round. Is it all it all oh yeah it's rainbow so all of them are colored um we don't use that word anymore but i believe there are some official just chocolate ones as well official yeah chocolate
ones uh i remember when the rainbow ones came out there was a little ad with a kid named kevin
who touched who touched the chips.
It was a black and white commercial, and everything came to life.
I apologize to the listeners.
I will be finishing soon.
Sounds like my wedding night.
Our guest today, a returning guest to the podcast, somebody we haven't seen for many years, but so glad to have her back.
It's Karen O'Keefe.
Hello.
Hey, guys.
Hello.
I'm so excited to be back.
Oh, I'm so good.
Good.
Thank you for being back on the podcast.
Are you, where are you?
You're in Toronto.
We're in the world.
Yes, I am in Toronto.
And yeah, and it's been, I haven't been, I've been away so long because I wasn't physically in Vancouver, but I see that is not a thing anymore.
We don't need to do that.
Yeah.
Oh,
we did have someone,
someone wrote in saying,
Oh,
you guys should get these people on your show.
They're,
they're doing a show in Vancouver.
And I was like,
it doesn't matter anymore.
We don't even see each other.
Yeah.
I was gonna say,
you guys live in the same neighborhood,
right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And once in a while we'll see each other.
Dan will be walking his dog or,
you know,
I'll be,
uh, I'll be hiding in the bushes, you know, I'll be, uh,
I'll be hiding in the bushes, hiding in the bushes, playing marbles,
nothing gross.
Just, uh, it's just something I like to do in the bush.
And you still can just keep your distance from each other.
Like you see each other, but you haven't been within six.
Yeah.
We don't acknowledge each other.
Yeah.
We have a mutual restraining orders.
Mine's a little bit bigger.
But we went and caught them at the same time from the same judge.
I'm allowed to get a little bit closer to him.
Should we get to know us?
Yeah.
Get to know us.
Get to know us.
I don't know how many. i know some of our guests listen yeah yes but but not all of them yeah because we're too dangerous for some people so yeah
but karen karen you're a listener yes i'm a fan so uh bumpers one day maybe you too can sit in the seat, which is in my house.
Yeah.
I've been to a live taping once.
Yeah. You guys came to Toronto in the before times.
That was exciting.
And I saw you in Toronto, maybe at comedy bar.
Yeah.
A few times.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Just socially at comedy bar.
And then, well, then you've been in Toronto without, not for a podcast like you were there for fringe shows and stuff now karen you are our only guest named karen
uh you mean oh is this true oh what i was listening to the double graham episode that was
oh i know i'm the only karen in this zoom yeah you are the only k. I will. I just looked it up and you haven't been on since 2013.
Yeah. And it's in that time, the meaning of the word Karen has changed.
And let's hear all about it. How has your life changed?
Oh, dear. I mean, it's something, you know, you could laugh off and now it's like, OK, OK, it's constant.
All right. All right. the only thing is that i mean
but i do fit the description i am a white lady in her 40s and uh i guess that's it you're always
asking for the manager yeah but i can't legitimately ask for a manager or make a
complaint or something you're like hey landlord i have no hot water stop caring this is karen don't you try and care in me yeah i remember when i was
trying to set up my uh album recording one one time i just started like stopping by the bar i
wanted to go to i'm like hey is your manager working tonight and they're like no who like
who should i tell him who's calling like uh steve say karen i just literally asked to see the manager. Oh, no. Tell him Miss O'Keefe would like to award.
Recently, just for work training, we had to do training on privilege and bias and racism in the workplace.
Yeah, we had to do training with like a drill press.
Yeah, we had to do training with like a drill press.
But it was one of them where it was like kind of a check your privilege quiz.
And it's like one of them was like, I have never been mocked for how my name sounds.
And I'm like, well, I know what I'm supposed to say, but I am a Karen.
I can't, I'm not entirely without mocking.
Yeah.
The closest we've had is Paul Bay. Yeah,
that's right.
And his name has changed from just a name too.
Yeah,
that's right.
Yeah.
Baby came a thing,
but that's,
that's a good thing.
I think.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Uh,
unless you're a base stopping by to ask for the manager and all of us.
Oh,
sure.
Yeah.
Back in square one.
I can't,
um,
Karen,
you,
uh,
what,
what do you do for work at this point?
What am I doing? Right now I am working
At a vaccine clinic
I am a
Comedian in the background and all that stuff
But I'm getting paid these days to
Work at one of the
Mask
Immunization clinics in Toronto
So we
We're kind of winding down a little bit by
this point but uh something i did last summer and then i thought this is a one-time thing that will
never happen again we've cured covid by august and uh then it flared up again around new year
so it's like yep i guess i'm going back so it's going back to my usual font
it's a very uh it's a very now job like it didn't exist two years ago and i
hope it won't exist two years from now yeah exactly like you get there you're like okay
this is training i'm gonna be able to apply this during the rest of my career yeah and you're
thinking like next summer when i'm back here i'm gonna like wait i shouldn't be here but next
summer like i'm gonna apply for that job um you didn't have to draw blood. You were just...
No, no.
And people were like,
my family and stuff were like,
what are you doing there?
Like, I'm not...
They won't let me inject anybody.
I am...
Graham, when you got your...
Do you think they draw blood at these clinics?
Yeah, wait.
My lady did.
She took some blood
and she said,
this is for mama,
which I was like,
okay, what does that mean?
I just want some of it.
Yeah, I guess it's easier to just poke something than it is to draw blood.
I mean, yeah, you have to withdraw it.
Yeah, that's true.
You do have to take it out.
There's some blood possibly in the transaction.
Yeah, they're very quick with the little cotton swab.
And I find you don't feel anything. These are one of the least painful needles I've ever had. possibly in the transaction. Yeah, they're very quick with the little cotton swab. Yeah.
And I find you don't feel anything.
These are one of the least painful needles I've ever had.
Yeah.
And since you work there, you probably get discounts.
You get, you know.
Yeah, yeah.
You get free.
You're not supposed to get high on your own supply, though.
You probably had four or five boosters at this point.
There really was a thing at the end of the day.
They're like, shots, shots, shots.
We want shots. You know, because they got shots that somebody needs to
take so yeah i got my second dose on my first day of work and i'm like well i hope i'm not
sick tomorrow because that's a bad look they're like people are not showing up all the time it's
fine yeah that's right yeah so that's just end of day yeah they they go out of their way to try
not to waste them.
Like once they open it up,
it's like,
yike,
like go into the street.
Does anyone have any friends and family that can get here in like the next 30
minutes?
No.
Wow.
Stand by awkwardly or like one guy brought us like three family members and
we had two doses left to like,
Ooh,
okay.
Make a choice.
Uh,
yeah,
I find they are like,
if you have a, uh, an appointment that day they're like
yeah that you they give you like a time like two o'clock but yeah but if as long as you show up
anytime that day they'll give you yes indeed i know people panic they're like oh i'm supposed
to hear 140 we're like oh you don't care like what was just at this point it's like we're we're
taking walk-ins it's uh everybody everybody who really wanted one kind of got one already so uh now we're getting teenagers cool
loitering yeah they gotta hang out somewhere
they're having older people boot for them
when we did it in the summer it was like mostly the adults were coming and everybody was so
excited like yay finally am i like where i'm getting vaccinated this is a thing but now we're
getting you know five to eleven year olds and this is not their choice no they did not volunteer to
come down here they're like yeah they're all five to eleven year olds are anti-vaxxers yeah that's
true but you know what you can you can persuade them over to your side if you bring them McDonald's.
That's true.
Did we ever try that with the convoy?
Did we try giving them McDonald's to see if they were just cranky, maybe?
That's right.
The ones that are screaming, you know, sometimes when they're done, people applaud.
Like, no, don't reward that shitty behavior.
Oh, that's true.
Yeah.
Like, if you applaud after they're done, it makes it thick. Yeah. Bravo. No do actually we know it is we are kind of happy though like oh good you can leave and we're in a big uh convention center so i find it's uh i forgot
how much kids love escalators like they just like they're not a fan of needles but they love
escalators so it's a really mixed day for them yeah a lot of highs and lows
i like escalators i think that my love affair with escalators still
continues we went to i took the kids to canadian tire the other day nice uh because we needed a new
helmet for skating because my kids their heads are growing so fast. So weirdly shaped.
The escalators at Canadian Tire are just the ramp kind.
Yeah.
Oh, not steps.
Our kids, they loved it.
Yeah.
That's kid paradise, you kidding?
Karen, one of my favorite things that you do is you will often post photos of you playing various roles in the background of television shows and movies.
That's right.
My other day job.
Yeah.
But I love it.
I love the celebration of it.
I love that you found the frame that you're in.
Oh, I love it, too.
I love it so much.
And like more than I should.
I feel a little embarrassing around friends who are real actors.
I'm like, no, no, like, like, I don't get to talk or like, oh, I'll watch for you I'm like, no, no, I don't get to talk.
Or like, oh, I'll watch for you now.
Like, no, no, that is it.
I did a freeze frame of the most exciting part of me being on that show.
You don't have to watch it.
But also, like, your actor friends, they're given lines and stuff.
You, you just have to be the policewoman in the background.
You have to figure out that character in your head.
That's right.
Yeah.
So, if anything, you're the better actor than these actor actors yes like thank you i'm glad you see
that yeah how many different how many is the most times that you've been a specific thing like you've
been the cop the most i think i want to start yeah like i have a whole on facebook i have a
whole album of me just being an extra in the background. But I think I should start a separate me being a cop album.
Yes.
I'm very, very cop-like.
I like it.
I don't have to bring my own clothes.
But it's a lot harder to go to the bathroom with all the cop gear.
Oh, really?
Well, because they always make cops wear like a romper.
Yeah.
You have to take the whole thing off.
Yeah.
a romper yeah you have to take the whole thing off yeah um what uh yeah have you been like have you been different kinds of cops or all just the same kind of like city cop like mostly yeah and
always american cops uh new york is probably the most common one uh are you ever drinking out of
those classic new york cups oh yeah Those little Greek ones. Those paper cups.
Shoot, no.
Now that I think about it, how come I don't have more of those?
Yeah, they don't have them anymore.
Just like Starbucks is completely white mopped the floor with them.
They're not.
I watched a movie from like the 90s and they were drinking about all those cups.
And I was like, this is good.
This feels right.
This feels like the new york i know man before giuliani got in here and cleaned it up it was a cesspool and we loved
it yeah that used to be a porn theater that one that's now like an adult theater and an m&m store
cbgb
what what's the weirdest extra you have the weirdest thing i've been ah like i've i liked
um i was an alien on defiant i was gonna guess alien nice alien yeah like it's like a cop or
alien that's i tend to be those um once the what's the weirdest one i was just body parts
like uh you were like i was just hands and i was working on a day with everybody else was also body
parts someone's like oh i'm the arm that gets killed.
And then someone else is like, I'm the foot that steps on the thing.
And I'm like, oh, I'm the hands that type.
Like, they just, they're just doing insert shots of body.
Because, like, the real actor doesn't need to be there.
Oh, right.
You weren't, like, dead body parts.
So, yeah, I probably could have explained it better.
Yeah.
So, body double part.
Yeah.
I was picturing, like, okay.
Not stunt doubles.
You had to wear, like like a green leotard everywhere
yes i was picturing even more old-timey that everybody was reaching into a set
they were all down below like puppeteers oh like uh sesame street yeah exactly um i actually my
i should say yeah my favorite job it was the i did um wasn't a, I was a stand-in, not a background actor, but they're very closely related.
Uh, I worked three years on Suits.
Oh, Suits!
Which is really cool.
Yeah, I was a stand-in for a tall, red-headed actress on that show.
So I was, I got to be the...
Did you ever get to meet...
The fake Donna.
Fake, hey, I'm fake Donna.
Yeah, I was going to say.
Did you ever meet fake Meghan Markle?
Yeah.
Uh, I did, and the real one, too. Oh, wow real one my first my first year was her last year on the show but by then it was already like uh do not
look directly at the megan markle like she's she's dating somebody very important and he's
probably not stopping by set today that's the question we always got like well because a lot
of spouses come by and everything you know like oh so and so's wife came by-so's wife came by. But we're like, is Prince Harry here?
Like, no, but that's a bodyguard over there.
That guy who looks not like a bodyguard.
Oh, yeah.
He's an unassuming crew member.
Like, I guess.
But he probably has skills.
Yeah, like good bodyguards are hidden, right?
Or maybe you want the show of force.
Yeah, I was expecting like a, you know, I don't know, a stereotypical big shaved head beefcake kind of guy.
But he was just like a.
Yeah, like me. Yeah. He just looked like a crew member who wasn't doing anything just not
working he's wearing a black t-shirt and he was middle-aged and uh not very tall and like he's
probably knows yeah he's probably got he can probably do stuff though sure oh yeah he can't
i got some lethal training were you like you all assumed it was a guy that was a security guy
because oh yeah Did we ever?
You just seem going back to the food truck over and over again.
Yeah.
It's hard to tell on a movie set or a TV set because there's so many people doing nothing.
Yeah, that's right.
He just looked like, which, is he an unhelpful, like, yeah.
Is he a lazy electrical guy, lazy camera guy?
I don't know what he is.
Yeah.
I was like, someone told me that he was a bodyguard.
They could have been pulling my leg.
Now that I think about it.
Yeah.
If Prince Harry had shown up,
would you have been like,
hey, we're both redheads.
Would you want to go chat?
Oh,
that would have been your end for sure.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I would have just circled around him weirdly until maybe he noticed.
And then,
cause I wouldn't,
I would have been shy, I guess, but still standing around.
Security, please take care of that woman who keeps walking in a circle around me.
Yeah, that was a neat gig.
And it ended, I guess, like it ended in 2019.
So it's like, well, the pandemic would have probably ended it anyway, I guess.
So you're not going back now that things are popping back up or?
We, yeah, things are slowly not. Yeah, things are popping back up or uh we yeah things are slowly not yeah things are
slowly coming back right but when it comes back you will do you'll be back in the game yeah oh
yeah for sure yeah i don't know how much longer the uh the clinic will last so yeah we get jump
back into uh random gigs that come up i hope it goes on i hope we need dose after dose after dose
of this stuff i hope that you come back and the first thing that you play is a person who
administers shots.
Oh, yeah.
Somebody in scrubs or something like that.
That would be fun.
Full circle.
The nurses I've worked with were like, oh, that's so cool.
You're an extra.
Like, yeah, but I'm just walking around in the background like you're a nurse.
And they've all asked me, like, who's your agent?
Like, can we apply?
Like, actually, yeah.
You get paid more if you're a real and like and they've all asked me like who's your agent like can we apply like actually yeah they you get paid more if you're a real nurse like
special skills like they need somebody to like give the lethal injection to the prisoner on that
prison show and stuff like that so they don't let people like me do that that's a real skill wow
that is cool yeah so man nurses want to do that on their day off so if you're an actor and you
and they're shooting a lethal injection scene, you actually have to get injected.
I guess so.
Or at least look like you know what you're doing.
They just put air in there.
Like real paramedics.
They always have real paramedics, real firemen, but fake cops.
Like, I don't know why they never have real cops playing golf.
Oh, weird.
Maybe it might have something to do with the amount of training.
Yeah.
But it's all good. maybe it might have something to do with the amount of training. Yeah. Uh,
but,
uh, it's all good.
Um,
the,
uh,
did any of the nurses,
when they found out you were an extra,
did it,
were any of the nurses like you extras,
you're the real hero.
No,
but they should,
they should say,
don't we?
Oh,
you,
um, think of how empty this scene would
have looked we had we'd have to do like the kevin mccallister like pulling nurses back and forth
that are just mannequins um have you ever done any acting have you been like you know spoken on camera that kind of stuff yes once
yes uh i was i had one line in a movie so that counts and they didn't give it to me on the day
it wasn't like hey you there here's a line it was like i auditioned and i thought well that was a
waste of time i went all the way to say that one line and now i'm going home and then i got the
part uh i was it was in the movie uh my spy it was uh it's a kid it's kind
of a kid's movie is that the one yeah that's right yeah so he was uh the scene was it was like
it was a grade five class like bring your parent or special friend to work day and they talk about
their careers and so i was just part of a montage of i was talking about my job at the airline and
we schedule over 3 000 flights a day
and i was like i didn't get to say anything funny and then he was all like i'm not a hitman i mean
he is how i picture a uh a bodyguard yeah oh for sure yeah he um It's funny. I feel like wrestlers, in order to get to the level of The Rock,
where they're making the films they want to make,
I feel like they'll have to pass through the silly.
They'll have to go and do a silly role.
So that people are like, yeah, I see him now as being like The Rock
was the tooth fairy in a movie.
Yeah. Oh, yeah. being like uh the rock was the the tooth fairy in a movie yeah oh yeah one wasn't i know vin diesel's
not a uh not a wrestler but the vin diesel did one that i thought was the tooth fairy one he did
one that was oh what was it called was it the pacifier yes he was a babysitter maybe excellent
i was gonna say does vin diesel have a sense of humor like does he poke fun at himself i guess he did he did the pacifier yeah he all i know about him is that
he's a he's a very caring lover according to uh a book that i read many years ago
yeah and he's a singer oh yeah that's right he's a singer. He does all his stunts in the Fast and Furious movies.
I've done that
where I've gone and auditioned for a one
sentence role.
The one, the shortest one
that I ever went to was two words. It was
the lake.
What's the context? Like, where is the dead body yeah it's like
something's like where is he and then i point at the lake and say the lake and they were like
thank you no thank you yeah dog day when they say thank you with that tone or it's like uh
you weren't even pointing in the direction of the lake you idiot
and then i i often do and the stuff i usually get is commercials so and a lot of the
a lot of them are not speaking so i'm just what are you in commercials almost like being an extra
uh various things i the auditions i get the most are for mom because i'm in the karen age group
yeah and then those are the ones i never get because it's like if there's kids there
no thank you we can tell you don't like kids yeah
we can i can be a mom with off-screen family my career is too important that's that's my line
so i've uh yeah trying to think i've got i got one where i was a i haven't seen i haven't seen
this one but other people have i was just a unsuccessful contestant in a cooking show so i'm just like
giving a are you kidding me look and nice this is good i was the the and the one where i actually
got to speak it was a bell commercial where me and just a guy were sitting on a couch and i'm
all like oh my belt my my tv package is so much better than your package and which is different
words but but i liked how it's like okay we weren't like we could have been roommates we could have been siblings we could have been gotten us like you're looking for a
lack of specificity yeah yeah yeah we're just two people sitting on the couch and i have a
superior cable package so yeah that's the basis of you and that person's friendship
yeah that's right i just wanted him to know that in real life what's your cable package i have a digital antenna i have just one of those things you stick to the wall
and what do you what do you get all out of it i get um mostly just the basic canadian ones i get
my cbc and my global and all and everything else is apps and there yeah everything else is streaming
but it's a to watch the news.
You can watch, I don't know.
I think Global's got America's Got Talent.
Or it's sister programming, America's Got Talent Extreme.
What's that?
What?
I haven't heard of that one.
It's America's Got Talent, but it's outside and it's all extreme sports.
There was a guy that went down a four-story ramp on a wheelchair.
And people doing motorcycle stunts and stuff like that. Like there was a guy that went down like a four story ramp on a wheelchair and, uh,
you know,
people doing motorcycle stunts and stuff like that.
There's going to be Canada's got talent.
Finally.
Is there,
Oh,
it's not already.
Well,
maybe there is,
but there's a,
if they've done it before,
there's a new one.
And do you want to know who the judges are?
Considering that how many of the America's got talent judges were not american
yeah i'm gonna say that uh because i'm in cal's in the extreme one and he has no business being
there for real who simon cal he's in the extreme one oh okay i think howie mandel is in the canadian
one howie mandel okay okay trish stratusus. Sure. Oh, yeah. Okay. Sure.
No Jan Arden, but good idea.
Alanis Morissette?
Nope.
Okay.
Lilly Singh.
Oh, Lilly Singh.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
I don't know who this is.
Lindsay L.
Oh, she's the host, so she's not a judge.
And the other judge is Cardinal Oficial.
Nice.
Oh, okay.
Great.
Yeah.
I don't know what the prize is.
Like in the American one, you get, you do a show, you like get a residency in Vegas.
Yeah.
And you get a million dollars.
On the extreme one, you only get $500,000, which is crazy.
And on the Canadian one, you get a big coat.
From the Burlington Coat Factory.
Yeah.
And a residency in Burlington. factory. Yeah. And residency in Burlington.
Yeah.
At Niagara Falls.
You perform at the Vaughn.
Yuck.
Yuck.
You've got a weekly standing gig.
Have you ever been to Vaughn to do a comedy?
Oh,
me?
I have.
Yeah.
Uh,
I don't know if it's still there anymore.
Like the club,
not the town.
No,
the town's gone.
Vaughn's done.
I do remember a Godzilla coming to Vaughn.
Uh,
been a while.
So yeah,
I'm pretty sure the,
a lot of clubs,
uh,
they,
they're not,
it's very rare to find an original Yucks Club.
Everything used to be something else.
Right.
Oh, yeah.
This Vaughn one, you were in a complex, if I recall correctly.
Yes.
Oh, and I heard you mentioning it had the dueling piano guys.
Yeah, yeah.
Used to be there.
So, yeah, so you've played that one, right?
Yes.
Yeah, I played that one.
Check those guys out.
Spent some time across the street at Dave & Buster's.
Oh, okay.
And a few of them, like there's a few,
and they're attached to like,
I don't know if it's owned by the Wendell Clarks chain,
but there's a...
Oh, that's right.
The Yucks in Oshawa is also attached to a Wendell Clarks.
What is a Wendell Clarks?
Oh, yeah, it's a chain of maybe three restaurants i don't know it's very small chain
local uh it's a um and wendell clark is a former hockey player yeah um and his face is on the logo
or on the menu or something chunky soup commercials oh maybe oh wow so he was ready he was ready with
a food brand yeah yeah and uh yeah just a restaurant that serves like pub food and stuff.
Yeah.
And he's,
I remember there being a picture of him like about to eat a burger.
And I remember thinking like,
that would be impossible to get your mouth wide enough open.
Cause it's like a picture.
Perfect hamburger.
Just watch me.
He turns it over like a cob of corn and just eats it.
That way.
I, we don't have uh our local um
uh local sports celebrities don't have restaurants here they have trevor linden fitness yeah oh okay
you still have steve nash it's on brand i don't know if that's still happening steve nash had its
own fitness and then uh we've got more more than one restaurant or only one restaurant called Joe Forte's,
which is named after a famous lifeguard.
Yeah.
And that's it.
I think that rounds out the list.
Wait, I haven't heard of a lot of famous lifeguards.
What was he famous for?
He was the man who taught Vancouver to swim.
Yeah.
He was like the famous, like he taught big classes of people how to swim.
And he was, I don't remember like where, what.
He was from Barbados or something.
And he, yeah, I don't know what beach he was on in Vancouver, but he was like old timey.
You know, when men wore the one piece of wool swimsuits.
Oh, okay.
Wool being the most versatile material at the time.
Yeah, it's just funny when somebody like Tim Hortons never really worked too much with the actual restaurant.
I get the feeling like Wendell Clark's showing up all the time at his restaurants.
I bet every time a new one opens, he will probably be there. He's still alive and everything. Yeah. I get the feeling like Wendell Clark's showing up all the time at his restaurants. I bet every time a new one opens, he will probably be there.
He's still alive and everything.
Yeah.
Have you ever been to an opening of a restaurant or a mall or anything like that?
Oh, I did go to the opening of a Wahlburgers.
And Donnie Wahlberg was there.
Donnie?
Yes, Donnie.
And then one of his brothers is a a chef one of the non-famous
lovers so uh i didn't know about my friend uh was visiting me from edmonton and she had like 24
hours in toronto i'm like yeah what do you want to do she's like there's an opening of a walberger
like what is any of that this is why i came here i'm only here for 24 hours because of this
and she was a fan of blue blood so it's like
we gotta like oh okay and it was happening and donnie walberg will be there like okay
so does is blue blood shot in toronto no okay looks like it might be nothing well it just looks
like you could have played a cop on it because we went to the we stood in line at the end so the physical building wasn't open yet but they
were just uh giving away burgers in a bag and uh and doing a photo you can do a photo op so there's
a picture of like me and her and donnie walberg and the chef walberg nice uh so the i so i haven't
been in the actual building it was built later i assume that when they find this opening it was
supposed to be built oh they weren't like putting shovels in the ground, like on the roof of somewhere.
Yeah, it was.
It was on the roof of something and it was raining, but the burgers were still very good.
So I went there once.
Quality.
I went to the wall burgers in Toronto.
I assume there's only one.
Mm hmm.
Yes.
As far as I know, down by who was near second city and gretzky's restaurant oh yeah
gretzky's yeah gotta have one of those which is now closed down i think well there was a when i
was a kid there was a chain of restaurants called the grapes it was a don cherry oh restaurant but
maybe it wasn't maybe it was just one in calgary but i remember going there and being like
i don't know about a whole restaurant dedicated to this guy.
Do you remember, I was thinking back about old stores.
Mostly I was thinking about old computer stores.
We used to have a place called Doppler Computer Software.
And before that, there was a place called Egghead Discount Software.
We never had any special, well, I mean, probably we did, but.
I was very tempted to buy an egghead
discount software hat on ebay but honestly i'm not gonna wear that hat unless you start your own
egghead computer shop hasn't been around for a long time tram um have you been to the opening
of anything graham yeah i, I was on tour.
I can't remember the town.
It was a small town, and I was there the day that the A&W was open,
and it was like Mardi Gras.
Everybody in the town was there.
The costumed root bear came out and shook hands and took photos.
And Graham.
Oh, boy.
This is a tough question.
Do you know what A&W stands for? Hey, you know what
Karen listens to the show? I do.
I don't know.
Karen, do you know? I don't know what it is.
Oh, neither do I. Oh, okay.
Because we want Dave to tell us.
That's one that may haunt us. We may never
know.
Well, I once went to Ambogus and
Whoop Beer.
Yes.
We this past weekend I once went to hamburgers and whoop beer. Yes. Uh,
we,
uh,
this past weekend,
uh,
the fried chick.
I think it's Filipino fried chicken chain.
Uh,
Jollibee.
Oh,
Jollibee.
Sure.
I'm not saying right. Uh,
opened here.
Jump in and say it incorrectly.
Uh,
uh,
it opened here this weekend and apparently there was like like lineups every morning at six in the morning for it to open at nine to have fried chicken at nine in the morning
now you put it with some waffles it's basically breakfast yeah that's that's true. I would never stand in line ever for a thing to open.
I did it when I was 19, I think.
Whenever the Phantom Menace came out, I lined up to go see that.
I was so pissed off after.
But yeah, I've never lined up for a debut thing,
even to get a phone or that kind of thing.
I bet I have.
I'm sure I have, but I can't remember.
I think it was maybe once.
It's the kind of thing that you do it once, you never do it again.
Unless you're the kind of person who likes that.
There's definitely a breed of people who line up for the new iPhone or something or the new.
Yes.
Yeah.
And it was like, it used to be if iPhone or something or the new. Yes. Yeah. And it was like,
it used to be,
if you were going to buy tickets to something.
Yeah.
Like music.
Oh,
you know what?
My,
I think my sister was working in like publicity and she got,
uh,
she managed to get me passes to when the Krispy Kreme donuts opened in like
the,
before it opened,
like the,
like press only, donut uh tour i love the idea of a press gallery like oh we're okay we're gonna do the scrum everybody yeah we're
gonna do the junket with the donut and the uh we went and i just remember being like, there's so many donuts to choose from.
And they all sucked except for that.
Just the main one they do.
Yeah.
I didn't know they had other flavors.
Yeah, that's the thing.
It's like no one knows they have other flavors.
The press tried to report it, but people don't care.
They don't want the real story.
I remember when you couldn't get them here,
that and a Red Bull wasn't available in Canada at one point.
Yeah.
It was too,
too much for us,
I guess.
I remember dating a guy who like back in 2003,
he would like,
like bring back like a donut,
bring back a Krispy Kreme and a Red Bull from his trip to Seattle or
something.
I'm like,
that's cool.
Things like that.
Yeah. You know, anything from like, that's cool. Things like that. Yeah.
You know, anything from...
Trader Joe's seems to be living...
Yeah, Trader Joe's, Target.
Oh. I mean, we had Target here
and we didn't appreciate it. Yeah, we fucked it up.
Yeah, we did it all wrong.
We can't have nice things. Yeah.
The reporting on it was so bad that people were like,
forget this. Let's go.
I did work the like
maybe work the opening of a target at my uh catering job they had uh us how like the the
target dog came to take pictures with the kids and stuff like that and they hired and as a banquet
server so we're serving hors d'oeuvres and stuff like that like this is not what target is like
to kind of corral the kids and so like we're wearing silly costumes
oh yeah it was near halloween does the target dog have a target on his head yeah yeah i can't
remember his name like bullseye or something it's a bull terrier like um spuds mckenzie i think
yeah i don't know his name was also his dog on cherry's dog was the same yeah what was that dog's
name blue blue blue oh I know that. Yeah.
Because he didn't add, so he like sold
batteries or some shit in the 80s. And he was like,
right, Blue? And the dog barked.
It's a good dog. It's a great
dog. Yeah. So beefy and just
a weird shaped head. Yeah.
So do you guys, Karen, do you
remember Spuds McKenzie from when you were a kid?
Like beer commercials?
Yeah. Yeah. Bud Light, maybe? I don't think so. He was a party you remember spuds mckenzie from when you were a kid like beer commercials yeah yeah bud light
maybe i don't think so he was a party animal the only reference the first reference i knew to that
was funky cold medina they referenced the dog in that but yet i didn't know that song but too young
to see beer commercials my friend had a calendar of it and it just was so funny it was
him and a bunch of girls in every yeah it was like women were attracted to this dog yeah like he'd be
wearing a hawaiian shirt and he'd be at like a 50s diner and uh everybody was having a great
time he was yeah everywhere that was the best time for america that's the time they're trying to get back to, you know?
Yeah, it feels that way.
Yeah.
The Spuds McKenzie era.
Everyone's so triggered.
Why can't I say it?
That target dog was named Bullseye, I guess.
All right.
You did your research.
Did you get a picture taken with him?
Oh, I don't think I did.
Oh, shame. Because he's never coming back. I guess not. you did your research did you get a picture taken with him? oh I don't think I did shame
because he's never coming back
I guess not
do they
yeah of course if he passes away
they just get another dog like him
and paint a target on that dog
I guarantee you it wasn't a dog
it was just
they got a local dog
and painted him up
there's no singular
target dog. Oh my.
I hadn't even thought of that. I just assumed he came up
from the US.
They just got a local dog. They don't know if
it's good with kids.
They got
him from a no-kill shelter and they said
then they dropped him off at a kill shelter
afterwards.
Here's some beer for you guys to take care of.
Yeah, I've never gone to.
Trying to think of a restaurant that I went to.
Yeah, I guess it was Don Cherry's is the only one that was like a celeb restaurant.
And I lived in Calgary, too.
I don't remember a Cherry's being there. It used to be.
It was off McLeod Trail.
There was a complex that
had a comic book store
called Tramps in the Southeast.
And there was a Safeway
there. And on the other side of the Safeway was
Grapes.
Which I didn't understand because I thought
it was Grapes and then his name was Don Cherry.
And I was like, why is it all called cherries?
And we'll never know.
The only other celebrity restaurant I've been to is in the Toronto airport
and it's Roger Mookings,
whatever that is.
Do you know who that is?
What?
No.
Is his name Roger Mooking?
Yeah.
Wasn't he from Bass is Bass?
Is that the same guy?
He played in the band bass's bass with
ivana santilli and uh the other guy yeah yeah the other guy uh and then he moved on to have a uh
food network show and he has a toronto airport restaurant i think you've made it as a restaurant
if you have a if you have an airport version of your restaurant.
Yeah.
But if you only have an airport version of the restaurant,
the inverse is also true.
That you chin in jetty is the other member of basis.
Base chin in jetty.
Everybody chin.
Karen,
do you know basis base?
I do not.
I'm sorry.
That was a nineties.
It has two different spellings of base in the name.
Oh, that's right. A little bit of beat box. What was their hit song? That was the 90s. It has two different spellings of bass in the name.
Oh, that's right.
A little bit of beatboxing. What was their hit song?
You know that I cry.
Oh, yeah.
For you every day.
And then Santella, she went on to have a solo venture.
Didn't she?
Sure.
It wasn't a restaurant, though.
No, only so many people can open restaurants
I'm shocked when anybody opens a restaurant
because it's such a hard thing to do
I don't understand how that message hasn't gotten through
frankly going to a restaurant is such a hard thing to do
especially because I smoke
and I need to take my table outside.
Uh,
can't even smoke on the patio anymore.
Oh man.
Let's get back to that Spuds McKenzie era.
You could smoke.
I guess.
Yeah.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
That,
I guess restaurants had smoking sections,
but it didn't occur to me that people would smoke in them.
Like smoke while you eat. Yeah i guess between courses yeah or between bites just have one burning the whole time yeah um these ribs
don't taste smoky enough i find when i go to toronto or new York, I see a lot more smokers than I do in Vancouver.
It's like almost unimaginable when you smell cigarette smoke in Vancouver.
You're like, what the hell?
Oh, okay.
But Toronto, I feel like that's still a pretty big smoke in town, right?
Have I got that wrong?
Yes.
Yeah, I know.
I just haven't thought of it.
I guess I don't see them because they're outside.
Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm indoorsy guess i don't see them because they're outside oh yeah i'm indoorsy i don't know yeah they're not at your house per se so
hey karen we come in smoke
we got kicked out of the rec center
yeah swish la won't let us dine in there anymore i'm trying to think if like what what i've compared
yeah toronto to like smoking white like what maybe there's less smoking here than a small town but
more smoking than vancouver or like yeah maybe your lifestyle maybe that's right maybe like
you go to a small town everybody's still smoking nobody's vaping there in a small town
um they're sucking down on chili dogs and uh i was i saw a picture on
reddit the other day that was like uh these three people with giant vape cloud like to
a woman in a wedding dress is it a wedding yeah and it was like our vape themed wedding shoot
looked weird and i was like why did you have a vape themed wedding shoot and like their faces
are obscured it's just like a smokestack coming out of their yeah this is the happiest day of
my life we want to we want everyone to know we vaped yeah and yeah that's how we met was at a
vaping conference that was one thing i saw a guy vaping the other day and he was just you just hold
the vape like anything else like when someone's smoking and
and i feel like that's a learned skill like how to hold a cigarette without looking like
looking like you know how to do it right yeah yeah like the hands are too stiff or yeah but
like vaping you're just it's just like you're holding your phone yeah it's uh i haven't seen
a lot of vaping in movies but then i watched euphoria and there's
vaping galore in that show and also penises a lot of penises in that show careful what you suck on
am i right yeah those things should have a warning all right
oh there's so many penis stores now in every corner yeah well i smell mango penises everywhere
yeah and they all have uh you know hilarious names yeah rock around the cock and yeah can i
this is where i buy my penis juice i gotta refill my penis juice i just get the cartridges
yeah yeah i uh and then you a lot of them you
have to charge you have to plug them in with usb and uh man it makes for some awkward wedding
nights especially if you're sure but especially if you had a vape themed penis shoot surely
there's been vape uh gender reveal. That feels like it's certainly
been a thing.
What would be fun is seeing somebody
vape out their candles on their birthday
cake. That would be fun.
Yeah, send us all your...
Actually, I want people to send us
their vape challenges and we'll do them all month.
Yeah, that's right. This is going to be
vape month here on the podcast.
And we'll vape anything. It doesn't matter if it's's like i'll vape a cantaloupe i'll vape
you know what else what else well that's the main one yeah you know uh football leather you know
these is scents that people freshly cut grass i'll vape all the shapes i'll do star i'll do flower have you ever vaped karen i have not no no i don't
see why three of us yeah yeah i've vaped before i've had a gram yeah i can see you yeah yeah just
to see see what it's all about it's very satisfying like very open to new experiences like yeah yeah
yeah exactly i like it when they do it when people do it with like a bubble when they mix vaping and bubbles
oh that is cool have you ever seen that yeah that's fun for the kids right they hold the
bubble and then they blow in it and the kids are like yay now now give me a turn not me
uh you know when i when they're kids now when i was a kid you had to spin the bottle now you
spin the vape and whoever whoever points out you gotta vape your vape into their mouth oh that's so gross the euphoria baby that's what
they're teaching us um dave what's going on with you man are you caught up on euphoria or no no i
watched the first couple episodes of second season and then.
Did you watch the first season? Yeah.
Oh, okay. Well, that's great.
Yeah.
How about you? Do you know Euphoria, Karen?
I do not.
It's on HBO.
Okay.
Which would be...
It's about
young people doing drugs and such. Yeah, it's not a little bit of Crave and it's about young people
doing drugs
and such
yeah
it's young drugs
yeah
it's got Zendaya
it's got Zendaya
you know
a really talented
young cast
and it's about
you know
the trials and tribulations
of being a teenager
yeah
sometimes they need
they hire
they need cops they don. They need cops.
They don't need cops.
They do need body parts though.
So I was, here's what's going on with me.
I went to, I went down to the local shopper's drug mart the other day.
Cause I had a hankering for uh
all dressed chips oh sure this is a famous this is a famous canadian food yeah rippled
that's you got to get the ruffles yes yeah yeah that's that's the winner uh and i went and the
shelves were bare right and there yes there was an empty chip shelf yesterday, too, at the grocery store.
There were no chips at the Shoppers Drug Mart.
I actually took a picture of what they had left because they were like.
Oh, yeah.
What's left?
What kind of weird combination of flavors is like turnip and oil or something like that?
There was like a bag of Miss Vicky's jalapeno.
Okay.
Yeah.
I can see that being.
There was a weird a weird dorito
uh dorito weirds it's not even a flavor and then i was like oh they don't have all dressed well
you know what i was gonna get the full big bag and i was like oh i'll just get one of the
personal sized bags the snack bags and went over overall those were gone too all of everything
was gone except i ended up getting a bag of bold barbecue doritos apparently i don't know if this
is connected but maybe it is in pei they a lot of the potatoes couldn't be shipped to america
because of potato wart oh so they gave away a lot of the potatoes to just like people in PEI could come
by and fill up any container and take as many potatoes as they want.
Oh,
well,
that's what I read was that the,
there was a dispute between the Loblaws company that owns,
uh,
everything in Canada and,
uh,
the Lays corporation.
Oh, they've had a falling out. They had a falling out. There was someone wants to raise prices and someone says, Canada and the Lays Corporation.
Oh, they've had a falling out.
They had a falling out.
There was someone wants to raise prices and someone says, no, you can't.
You're the one thing.
The price of chips must never go up.
Yeah.
Chips are inflation proof.
Or if you, if we pay more for chips, we'll have to raise the prices.
And frankly, our margins are razor thick whatever the opposite i don't know it's the brooms brooms to candle thing isn't it the blah blahs is the western
family that's like the richest family in canada oh are they yeah oh they're they're up there for
sure yeah yeah because like in bc the richest guy is Jim Patterson, who looks exactly like Mr. Burns.
Yeah.
Who's the richest guy in Ontario?
Who does everybody hate out there?
Is it Kevin O'Leary?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, shoot.
I would say it's probably the Westons or the Rogerses.
Yeah.
Oh, the Rogerses.
The Rogerses.
Yeah.
And they come with a built-in family drama there's
yeah oh yeah that's right there was a whole fighting for supremacy now that you know the
the patriarch has passed away so it's a mess the next generation yeah yeah the um uh i've only seen
that type of family uh portrayed in movies i don't know anybody who had rich enough relatives to be like, let's get in there.
I think, if anything, it's like, let's get out of here. Their debt is going to come our way.
I think the
Weston family are the fourth richest Canadians.
Jim Patterson in there at all?
The Irvings up there?
The Irvings? there? The Irvings
James Irving
This is from Statista.com
Yep
Reliable source
As of 2020
The Westons are worth 8.3 billion
James Irving is 6.1 billion
Chip Wilson
Lululemon Magnet is 5.5
Jim Patterson is 5.4. David Thompson
and family are the richest at 39 million.
Do you think they ever get together, all these people, and have like, watch human
cockfights or something like that?
Is that what you call euphoria? Anyway, so these
wealthy fat cats aren't letting me get chips
so i but they did the one thing that was not sold out was all their crappy house brand chips
you know what i had a house brand chip at canadian tire and those kick ass oh yeah
yeah so next time you're in i think they're called like kevin's
or something and it's like a surfing potato anyways their ripple chips rule uh so this so
this company the the lob the weston family i hope i'm right about that uh this disgusting family
their brand of chips that they sell in uh shoppers drug mart everything is loads of the name
of it of every chip is loads of sour cream and onion loads they're these people are disgusting
their house brand of ice cream is like it literally says cream first cream first vanilla these people are just obsessed uh so i got but i got there loads
of uh all dressed chips and you have to immediately pour them out and get rid of the package because
it was so disgusting and they were they weren't very good uh and then so i ordered uh i had to order some groceries online at a different store at Save On Foods, and I ordered Ruffles all-dressed chips.
And then when I got my order, I checked my receipt and said, oh, they had to substitute a different brand of all-dressed chips.
So they gave me the old Dutch all-dressed chips.
And they were called splooges of, yeah.
But then when I got home, they had given me both.
So I had all three kinds of all-dressed chips.
So I did a little taste test.
Oh, yeah.
Did you blindfold yourself?
I guess you didn't know which one was where.
Yeah.
And I laid it down on my hand so it felt
asleep. Just so it felt like
someone else was feeding me these chips.
And then I, so
number one chip
is the Ruffles all dress chips.
Okay, so that still reigns supreme.
Yeah.
Number two
is the old Dutch. It's not ruffleduffled i don't know what it's really going for
and then number three distant third is the loads the loads brand yeah karen what's your favorite
chip salt and vinegar salt and vinegar what though lays oh what kind of uh what whose brand oh yeah salt and vinegar but they're not
created equal yeah that's right uh i guess i go for the cheap one i go for like the no-name brand
it's like a you might get like a dollar like it might be a dollar for a bag yeah okay like the
actual no-name like yellow yeah i think it's a no-name from uh i've never had them i wonder if
they're good i bet they are but yeah and i don't bet they are I feel like I don't need to escalate it
I don't need to like
The Miss Vickies are weird
They're one flavor
Oh no is it Miss Vickies that has like black pepper
Something in black pepper
Those rule
They slap
I stab them
They're a bop
The all dressed That's like a canadian a famous canadian
style of chip yeah yes but i believe it's yeah when i was growing up i the famous style of
canadian chip was ketchup that's right i think they're both but i don't think no one talks about
kind of they're kind of similar i feel like they're yeah very closely related chips no one
talks about ketchup anymore
no but they're still out there you can still get you can get loads of ketchup
yeah ketchup you only hear about if it's a canada versus u.s thing like oh we're proud of our
ketchup chips they're very canadian but canadians we don't talk about it amongst ourselves
no we're not talking about like yeah that's right yeah like i think when i went to ireland as a teenager it was a rare
site to see somebody drinking guinness like i'm sure people do but i never saw wow
oh yeah because everybody's drunk on whiskey over there yes yeah absolutely and they yeah
they all wear uh wool knit sweaters.
And then the women are all pregnant all the time.
Yeah.
Good Lord. If you try to stop a singalong of Danny boy.
Oh boy.
The pipes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We, that kind of thing.
The Canadian thing is embarrassing.
I can almost think of no Canadian food that we should be really proud of.
Like it's all stuff that's bad for you.
And you're like,
Oh yeah.
No,
no,
it's pretty good.
Maple syrup.
Whenever.
Like what is Canadian cuisine?
Aside from the fact that it's all junk food and desserts.
And I mean,
it's,
I mean,
it's good.
Like,
like,
like,
like bear paw, maybe?
Bear claw?
Oh, yeah.
Bear claw, for sure.
Is that Canadian?
I don't know.
Oh, yeah.
Beaver tail.
That's Canadian.
Maybe that's what I'm thinking of.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know.
By catering job, we were hosting some American delegates for some reason.
We had a poutine bar.
So it's like, as many toppings as you want.
And they're like, what the hell is this?
You can put whatever you want on it like but what there's curds like we
don't understand they're like you just like make them like okay well i guess the classic would be
gravy and cheese curds and fries and uh then we have all this other stuff that has no business
being on there but yeah i'm not convincing anyone that this sounds good.
It's actually a good idea.
Like a subway style poutine restaurant.
I mean, that's what,
what do you call them?
So kind of is the,
what's his name?
Like herbs,
poutine or something like that.
Oh,
smokes,
smokes or smokes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We used to have one.
Not anymore.
No.
Um,
they still,
they're still out there in Ontario. You can get a smokes poutine for sure probably
here one of those things
to where he obviously
owned the company and thought that he should be
the mascot of the company yeah
I don't know who smoke is
but his face is on it
oh he's you know what he's Canada's
richest person smoke
it's me smoke Oh he's You know what He's Canada's richest person Smoke The smoke empire
It's me smoke
From smokes poutine
People say we don't have
Cuisine here in Canada
But let me tell you
You can put anything
On poutine
Anyway
So I had a little
Chip battle at my house
I have solidarity With the Lays Corporation Someone's gonna tell me They're even worse Anyway, so I had a little chip battle at my house. Chip off.
I have solidarity with the Lays Corporation.
Someone's going to tell me they're even worse, but whatever.
Yeah, that's right.
You rearranged the letters.
It's a sleigh.
Yeah, that's true.
Sleigh Queen.
What's going on with you?
Not too much, but in the last couple of weeks weeks i've been trying to not wake up and instantly
look at my phone or computer like because it's tempting to like the second you wake up to be
like oh phone what's going on what's going on phone things happened overnight yeah yeah let's
check the trending twitters let's check the reddits let's check the emails and the and the
instagrams so i'm trying to not to do that first thing in the morning so what i've been doing
instead is i've been listening to the radio i wake up in the morning i put on the radio
and i just let then i just lie there and let it take me away what station news 11 30 oh news 11 30 that was nobody's guess
i was gonna ask like do they still have those wild guys in the morning but maybe not on that
channel no not on that channel well yeah but i was like do those guys exist those morning is it
traffic on the ones that kind of thing that kind of thing yeah and those those morning djs do still
very much exist and uh they're always trying to
call somebody and give them money or waiting for people to call them so they can give them money
that's the big draw but yeah news 11 30 here's the weird thing about the news team is you would
assume that at the station would just be one guy delivering all the news like yeah why would they
have other people in for just a segment of the news all the news like yeah why would they have other people
in for just a segment of the news but that's exactly what they have they have a news guy
sports guy weather guy market person and a traffic person so the market person is like i just went to
the market uh here's what i got i went i went thrifting today yeah i went to the market all out of
lays i report everything yeah i'm the market guy on this show um but yeah the uh i how how
in like half an hour how many times does the market guy talk uh the market everything is on like a certain number of loop yeah yeah
and so like i listen to one loop and then then i'm done how long is the loop like probably
15 minutes 15 to 20 minutes i guess and then it just loops back around there's nothing new
that's happened in the markets at the last time um but yeah it's a
bunch of different people maybe they're on other shows or something maybe and that's oh sure there's
some sister stations maybe like maybe news guy is doing the news on that channel and then he's going
yeah drops in the by the rock station to also give them some news
i got too much news and so i thought i'd drop by yeah i could give you
some rock news uh zz top uh what are they uh well they were they were around for a long time
um but like it's also uh it feels wholesome it feels wholesome to listen to the radio
you know going on the internet right away.
And it is a radio?
Is it a clock radio?
No, I do have it on an app.
Aha.
I know, that's true.
They get you.
They get you coming and going.
I thought about buying a radio alarm, but where the fuck would I put it?
You know what I mean?
I would never get it on the clock.
I have a clock radio that I just look at for,
use it for looking at the time,
but I can never find,
I'm always,
I can never not have it between stations.
Like,
it's always fuzzy.
Like when you're adjusting the dial and then it sounds good.
And then you step away and it gets fuzzy again.
Like I just,
I've never been able to find the right.
It's weird that that was the way that everyone was kind of okay with that for a hundred years.
Yeah. Um, that that was the way that everyone was kind of okay with that for a hundred years yeah
um but it's still there radio's still there they said it would die like numerous times over and it
still still exists and you know i'm one of the people propping it up i like i like the news
for your service yes thank you very much. I went,
I,
we had,
when we got the new car last year,
we got,
uh,
I signed up for Sirius XM radio.
Oh yeah.
And it was like $5 a month.
And then,
uh,
and then I got an email saying,
yeah,
uh,
now that your trial is over,
uh,
it'll be going up to $25 a month that I went to cancel on their website.
Nowhere you can cancel on their website.
Yeah.
So you have to call them.
And I was like, I know how this works.
So I will call.
I'll say I'm going to cancel.
They're going to give me a deal.
I'll still have Sirius XM.
And so I called them up and they were like, yeah, oh, I understand your concerns.
Well, that was just a trial offer.
So now we'd like to, if you'd like to keep it, we could maybe work with you and get you $12 a month.
And I was like, no, I don't like it that much.
Yeah.
Yeah, I can get radio for free.
Okay. Yeah, I can get radio for free. Okay, well, maybe we can give you, if you want fewer stations, we can give you a lower price.
And I'm like, no, I want everything for $1.
They were like, well, they didn't think I was prepared to walk away, but I walked away.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, I had a subscription to the New York Times and the Globe and Mail.
And I know they've both lapsed, but they still send me an email in the morning and in the afternoon every single day.
New York Times, I went to cancel and they gave me a better deal.
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
That's right.
Just from a chat online.
I didn't even have to call anyone.
Yeah.
Yes.
They're about reader retention, whereas the Globe and Mail, I don't even have to call anyone. Yeah. Yes. That's there about reader retention.
Whereas the global mail,
I don't know what the hell they're doing over there.
So he said,
Graham,
that they email you twice a day with news or.
Okay.
Like,
please stay,
please sign up.
Pretty morning.
Come on back,
man.
Today's headline.
We need your money.
We miss you.
We just bought Wordle.
We spent all our wad on Wordle.
Yeah, we're going to ruin Wordle for everybody.
Should we move on to some overheards?
Okay.
Oh, wait, you know what?
What?
How about some business?
Oh, shit. herds oh okay oh wait you know what what how about some business oh shit before we go into
over herds let's take care of a little bit of things that we call business but it's singular
so i shouldn't have said things it's a little bit of things yeah we got a jumbotron message if anyone
here would like it's our first jumbotron message of the year there's not a big demand for these uh but if anyone out there wants one you know where to get it you know yeah exactly
go to maximumfun.org jumbotron this one is for leslie and it is from samantha graham take it
away leslie cheers to you following your dreams of a life consistent
sunshine life of consistent sunshine and access to a pool Arizona will never have New York's bagels
but who cares when you're sipping margaritas on a bagel pool floaty thank you for introducing me
to stop podcasting yourself 10 years ago couldn't imagine a better send-off than a message from Dave and Graham. Yeah. Yay. That's nice.
Arizona will never have New York's bagels,
but New York will have Arizona's iced tea.
That's right.
Yeah.
That's the way the trade deal was worked out.
Yeah.
Meets Lake.
So, yes.
Indeed, Leslie.
Enjoy that state that we love to call Arizona.
When you reunite in Arizona, bring some bagels with you.
Bring some of those New York delicious bagels.
Yeah, come on, Samantha.
Yeah, exactly.
Don't hoard them.
Yeah.
What are you, just playing ring toss with bagels every day in New York?
Forget it, your friend Leslie?
Now it's time to move on to some overheards.
Most game shows quiz contestants about topics they don't even care about.
But for 100 episodes, the Go Fact Yourself podcast has asked celebrity guests trivia about topics they choose for themselves.
And introduced them to some of their personal heroes along the way.
Oh my gosh.
Shut up.
Oh, I feel like I'm going to cry.
Oh my gosh.
It's always so exciting to meet you.
Join me, Jake Heath Van Straten.
And me, Helen Hong, along with special guests DJ Jazzy Jeff and Faith Saley,
plus some amazing surprise experts on the 100th episode of Go Fact Yourself.
And join us twice a month, every month for new episodes of Go Fact Yourself here on Maximum Fun.
Hi, Maximum Fun. It's me, James Arthur M. from Minority Corner. Okay, I got some good news and
I got some bad news. Bad news, Minor news minority corner after seven years and 340 episodes
we are wrapping up our show i know i know but hey good news good news is that means we must have
solved racism and homophobia and sexism and equality and equity for all yay no no we didn't
well i'd like to think at least that we are better off than when we started seven years ago.
So don't worry.
We might be saying goodbye, but our episodes will live on in the podcast airwaves forever.
Or until the internet crashes and burn.
Whatever comes first.
Minority Corner.
The final episodes right here on Maximum Fun or wherever you get your podcasts.
Minority Corner.
Because together, we're the majority overheard overheard the segment where if you out there have never heard this segment before
pretty self-explanatory but i'll explain it all the same you hear something out there in the world
you come here on the podcast call you can write or you can be a guest and we always like to start
with the guest karen would you please don't let people think you can be a guest and we always like to start with the guest
karen would you please don't let people think they could be a guest don't well one to once a year we
have a sweepstakes and if we call you at the right time oh we do we are after christmas show lately
it's been all a guest yeah but if you know the phrase that pays then uh that's true when a seat
on the podcast um if anybody wants to guess what the phrase that pays is uh that's true when a seat on the podcast um if anybody wants to guess what
the phrase that pays is uh i encourage you to send in a message you sure no well don't we're
gonna get a thousand messages that say amateurs and whoop here uh karen do you have an overheard
i do i've been uh gathering them if you have more than one we're totally we're really okay oh well then um one okay i have to
admit this is one i i wrote in one once but i never heard it right if you hate it
don't you think that was a clue that maybe i know they're like oh no it's not good
i'll i'll spring it on though
i'll get it on no matter what
Actually well it's one of our current
Overheard a kid at the vaccination clinic
We're asking them like oh is this
Is this your first dose or your second dose
And she goes my last one
It's the last god damn thing I do
I bet that place is a good
Overheard
Location Although with all those masks I bet that place is a good overheard location.
Yeah.
Although with all those masks, it's hard to hear people.
How many people just say, oh, I hate needles.
Like, who loves needles?
Like, you're not special.
You know, the cast of Trainspotting.
Sure, yeah.
Goths.
Goths, sure.
The cast of Requiem for a Dream.
These are all big needle folks.
Hell racer.
Do you,
do you have more?
Do you want us to go around the horn and you do another one?
Or do you want to do another one right now?
How many do you have?
Oh,
let's see.
Wow.
This is a list.
Yeah. She just unscrolled a parchment.
Another overheard.
So, yeah, I heard a girl saying to her friends, like, well, me and him got along just fine until he tried to mansplain the whole goth scene to me.
Yeah, exactly.
You want to find that out for yourself.
Also, what's the explanation?
What's the mansplanation?
Yeah, that's what the man had to do to me. It's not something you would really the mansplanation yeah that's what the maddie
it's not something you would really understand as a woman it's something
it's really a man-driven yeah industry yeah do you think there's only one company that supplies
all the like towns goth shops like there's you know there's enough towns i think to make a decent
business out of you know spooky corsets or something like that.
Fingerless gloves.
You opened for spooky corsets, didn't you?
In vaudeville?
Yeah.
Their act was crazy filled with penises.
Yeah, no, I think your goth store would have multiple brands.
Yeah? You wouldn't have one supplier. We have all the top goth brands. Like a house want, your goth store would have multiple brands. Yeah.
You wouldn't have one supplier.
We have all the top goth brands.
Like a house brand.
You got your Kirkland.
Yeah, we sure have.
We've got no name.
We've got loads of goth.
Gobs of goth.
Do you have another overheard?
Okay, I'll do one more.
Oh, yeah.
Yes.
Yes.
um do you have another overheard okay i'll do one more oh yeah yes yes uh sorry does it's like going home on a uh subway like super late at night there's like a really tired guy with his
friends he's like i know i smell like ass by the end of it i just don't want to smell like double
ass like that it's like you just know like it's like there's a given like there's a certain amount
of ass that we all have to i'm. Yeah. By the end of what?
Oh, I think it was, I assume, like, a long work day or something.
Like, the end of a shift.
Oh, sure.
Be like, oh, yeah, well, obviously, you know, you can't avoid smelling like ass at the end of it.
Yeah, at the bean factory.
You know, if you can avoid smelling like double ass, then, yeah.
Yeah, I got to go from the bean factory to the, I don't know, whatever makes up other farts.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
For the toot festival.
We got enough beans out there.
I got another broccoli factory, bean factory, and then...
A broccoli factory?
They're making synthetic broccoli.
Dave, do you have an overt?
Yeah, mine is...
Okay, so this is not...
Barely counts because it's a child of mine who was in my car and it's something she said something that has become quite the motif on the show lately.
But we were it snowed last week for one day and it was not very much a tiny amount of snow.
Yeah.
not very much, a tiny amount of snow.
Yeah.
But we left, I was driving the kids to school and we left early because I was like,
I have a feeling there's going to be bad traffic.
Right.
Because of the snow.
And we were driving down a major street
and there were, you know,
two lanes of traffic going our direction,
two lanes coming the other direction.
And a guy was just trying to sneak across in his
car he was like slowly edging out into traffic but too slowly and waiting for an opportunity to
cross and he ended up just blocking me and the guy next to me and so we're stopped and i'm just like
bad mouthing him like look at this idiot oh come on buddy what are you doing and then he
realizes he's not gonna get across so he backs up and then the guy next to me goes like he makes
room for the guy next to me but i'm still stuck yeah and then he goes forward again and i i uh
you know i'm my kids are with me i'm trying not to swear or like fly off the handle you know how
i'm a yeah yeah rageaholic yeah short fuse on this guy uh so i say to the kids oh this guy this guy's
not a very good driver and uh poppy says oh is he like mr bean yes one of the worst drivers around
if you ask i don't know that's debatable he's well he's always
hitting a three-wheel car and that's not hitting it he's driving it off the road that yeah which
is not good but he's very skilled he he'll like he will follow a an ambulance super close oh yeah
so he can he'll he you know he had a heck of a time getting into that parking lot. And there's an episode where he's on the roof.
That's what I was thinking.
Like when he's on his big living room chair, his lounge chair, on the roof of his Mini, driving with like a broom and some ropes.
I mean, he's a good driver.
He's a good driver in that scenario.
Absolutely.
I take it back.
I'm sorry, Mr. Bean.
You're a good driver in that scenario absolutely i take it back i'm sorry mr bean you're a great driver please don't come over to my house and accidentally kill me with this
fucking axe you know by accident does he ever accidentally kill anyone i guess
the blue the three-wheeled car is probably dead
just leaves a trail of carnage in his way yeah or you think it's the same guy every time or is it
different people in different blue oh that's a good question i'm assuming the same guy he probably
has a nemesis yeah right yeah yeah yeah he's taking it out on his his mortal enemy i buy that
i buy that yeah what did he ever do to mr bean he? He wouldn't let him cheat off of his test.
You think it's the same guy?
Yeah, same guy.
Do you have an overheard?
I do.
Mine is also involving a child.
My brother and sister-in-law's child, Mason, has learned how to dance.
That's the new thing they put on how old is mason he is two
and a bit uh two and a half we'll say and he uh he loves it he put on the music he does the kind
of like classic baby dance it takes me like wiggly butt yeah yeah yeah jumping up some you know
mostly torso mostly torso work and uh there they got a video from him he was dancing
to Everybody Dance Now
at CNC Music Factory
and they were trying to get him to do different dance
moves they were like raise the roof and he kind
of did it with one hand and do the
sprinkler and then somebody in the room
said hey can you do the running man and he was
like yeah and he just ran out of the room
laughter
laughter
really good something Breach would do He was like, yeah, and he just ran out of the room.
Really good.
Something Screech would do.
We call him Tiny Screech.
That's his nickname around the house.
Small Screech.
Yeah.
Now we also have overheards sent in to us from all over the map. If you want to send one to us, you can send it in to spy at maximumfun.org.
And let's say the first one is from Izzy in Toronto.
You know Izzy?
Oh, yes.
You do?
It's like I'm the only Karen.
Yeah.
One Izzy, one Karen.
Oh, yeah.
Overseen at the basement of Tallboy's Craft Beer House in Toronto.
That's really close to me, actually.
Yeah.
Maybe I do know Izzy.
So you do know Izzy is what you're trying to say.
Wait, is it true for Isabel?
Yeah, I know Izzy.
During a fun stand-up show, this is the basement.
I'm assuming this is the washroom, it says,
you know, a nice pencil,
full house shaped how I am as an adult.
Oh, sure, yeah.
Yeah, that's nice.
Maybe it was a
message to the late Bob Saget.
Just like putting it out there.
Or the current
Dave Coulier, who's still with us.
Maybe it was Alanis.
Shit.
That's true.
That did happen.
And, you know.
That did shape how she, that did shape her as an adult.
How is Dave Coulier not on Canada's Got Talent?
He's not Canadian.
Hmm.
Interesting.
Touche.
We've been over this.
But, you know, couldn't they get Joe Flaherty or something like that?
Like, why such an obvious pick with the Howie Mandel?
That's all I'm saying.
I think he probably has a stake in it.
Oh, yeah.
He probably is the producer of it.
Mandel Industries.
Richest man in Canada, Howie Mandel.
This next one comes from Alex.
This is the setting.
Walking the dog on the street, passing by two guys, biker guys,
talking to each other outside the building door.
35, 40-year-old, 50-year-old, other guy.
Guy one, hey, man, what's wrong?
Everything okay?
Guy two, oh, man, I don't know.
Having a weird day. Don't know what to do with this situation what happened i just found out that my dad is fucking
my ex-girlfriend man the guy would say well that'll make your day interesting
you were saying before how everything's so boring that's gonna really jazz things up
why can't your dad just date your ex-girlfriend why do you have to get
into the specifics uh-huh yeah i heard that my dad's seeing my ex-girlfriend or that my dad has
a crush on my ex-girlfriend that's cute actually that is cute i hope he's not trying to go to bed
with her my dad sent a note asking my ex-girlfriend if she likes him
back.
Go to bed
with.
This last one is from Casey
in Arkansas.
We were talking about our plans for an upcoming
trip while eating supper with my six-year-old.
He ended up dropping some food on his shirt, and like he always does, proceeded to just
remove the shirt instead of wiping the spill.
He quickly looked at my husband and said, now guys, I know I won't be taking off my
clothes in any restaurants at Disney.
Let's chill out, everyone.
Yeah, yeah.
This is a one-time deal um i don't know what
the i know that they serve turkey legs yeah i don't know if you're disney yeah disneyland can
you door dash a turkey leg from disney from disney it ends up costing you 120 dollars
that's on site i think it it got sent to 21. Yeah.
Have you ever been to Disneyland slash world?
Karen?
I went to Disney world, the one in Florida.
Yeah.
It was a seven, which is probably a great age to go.
So yeah.
Yeah. Cause it's like old enough that you remember it and.
Yeah.
Not old enough to be traumatized by it.
Yeah.
And then, yeah.
And then my brother was five.
So it was like, I don't know if maybe he doesn't remember it as much,
but it was a, yeah, it was fun. Yeah. Yeah so i was like i don't know maybe he doesn't remember it as much but it was uh yeah it was fun yeah yeah specific uh yeah there's a big ball there
yeah there's a big ball yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
world after all sounds like she definitely went yeah that's right i can prove it yeah you went
on it's a small world that's nobody would know about that unless you went yeah no that's insider
stuff big ball and additional overheards that are written and we also accept your phone calls if you Nobody would know about that unless you went. Yeah, that's insider stuff. Big ball.
In addition to overheards that are written in,
we also accept your phone calls.
If you want to call us, our phone number is 1-844-779-7631.
That's one.
Ugh.
SpyPod 1, like these people have.
Hi, Dave and Graham.
This is Russ from Oklahoma.
I was just calling with Overheard.
In my job, I'm part of a unit that does pain management where we inject people's backs and legs that are hurting.
And so I see a lot of ass crack in a day.
And one day, the patient was sitting with the doctor,
and he, as he always does, said,
Do you have any questions for me before we get started?
And she waited about three seconds, and then she said,
Yes.
When you were in medical school, did you know you would have to look at butts all day long?
That's all I got.
Great show, guys.
Off I go.
I guess if you're a proctologist, you knew.
Yeah.
Pain management? I don't know. Pain in the butt? Yeah, guys. Off I go. I guess if you're a proctologist, you knew. Yeah. Pain management?
I don't know.
Pain in the butt?
Yeah, sure.
Yeah, so I guess he's injecting, like, steroids or morphine.
Hot beef.
That's my favorite chip flavor.
Y'all got any hot beef back there i mean i feel like i don't get
them injected directly into my ass but somehow they end up there anyway all right ladies yeah
you don't own chips you just rent them that's what i said not a disgusting phrase i've never
heard of before oh it's it's about beer don't buy it, you just rent it.
What does that mean?
You pee it out pretty fast.
Oh, but you definitely get drunk.
Yeah, that's true.
You get a beer belly and stuff.
Isn't it true of all food that it comes out of you?
But I mean, beer has probably no nutritional value,
so it just goes in and goes out.
But like gum is an investment.
That's with you for years.
Yeah, exactly.
That you own. You swallow gum, you got that for life.
Anytime I'm on a job interview, they ask me what my five-year plan is.
I'm like, well, I'm going to be digesting most of this piece of gum.
They're like, shit, y'all can get out of here.
All right, here's your
next phone call.
Hey, Dave and Graham, this is Gabe from
Los Angeles.
I was just walking down
Hollywood Boulevard when I overheard
a man say
um
fuck
Oh, it's
ah motherfucker
what did he say
ah
oh no
fuck
that's like the panic oh no that's the genre when the moment where the caller realizes that it's definitely going to be played as well
oh no dave's gonna play this one
oh that was great yeah that was good for whatiles is. Technically, that doesn't count as an overheard, but...
Did he call back?
Nope.
Oh, no.
I was like, when these calls have, like, multi-parts,
they call back and you're trying to redeem themselves.
I know, I always check, but no, this guy presumably perished.
Yes.
He was hit by a comet.
He wasn't paying attention.
He was leaving that over.
And here's your final
phone call
hi Dave and Graham and fabulous
guest this is Julie from
Woodbridge Virginia
I overheard my very
outgoing 7 year old daughter
say this to my husband
she said daddy
I don't like being the center of attention
and he was like why do you say that?
And she answers, imagine this.
I'm rich and I go onto a stage and everyone cheers.
That makes me embarrassed.
All right, off I go.
So Jimmy Patterson has to go through every week at his...
Jimmy Fallon has to go through.
Yeah, yeah, exactly the two jimmies
slim jims the three jimmies um yeah i guess that's i don't know that's like a kid's understanding of
what's famous i guess yeah you're the rich person goes on stage and everyone claps for them sounds
i mean they could buy people looking at butts all day. Yeah. This is what jobs are.
Yeah.
Why would you pick the butt one if you could pick being rich and getting clapped at?
Well, that brings us to the end of this here podcast.
Oh, man.
Karen, thank you so much for being our guest.
Oh, man.
Thanks for having me.
Of course.
It was exciting.
Yeah.
I mentioned it was, yeah, once every nine years, I guess.
Yeah.
We'll see you again.
Yeah.
We'll see you again in 2033.
Yeah.
Hopefully, you'll be an extra in a futuristic cop movie.
Indeed.
No, wait.
29.
2031.
Yeah. 2031. Yeah. Yeah. You don't have to wait those extra couple years um where can people find your your goings on uh you can find my website is karenokeef.net
and then from there you can see twitter and instagram and stuff like that or everything
that's that's the hub yeah yeah that's kKeefe dot net I have an actual website that is still working as far as I know and nice
uh yeah and I have a comedy album out called surprised eyebrows check that out probably
somewhere yeah Spotify and yeah nice nice well thank you so much for being our guest it was a
treat to have you oh man it was so fun uh and you our guest. It was a treat to have you. Oh, man, it was so fun.
And you listeners out there, it's very nice to have you.
And thank you very much for listening to the show.
And if you're out there and you're considering a career, think about rich people getting applause.
Not so much.
Looking at butts.
Join us next time on Stop Podcasting Yourself.