Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 729 - Karen O'Keefe

Episode Date: March 8, 2022

Comedian Karen O’Keefe returns to talk extra work, Canadian cuisine, and news radio....

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hi, he's Dave Shumka, and he's Graham Clark, and together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello, everybody, and welcome to episode number 729 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who's chewing down on some cookies, Mr. Dave Shumka. I've been drinking coffee and I've been eating cookies. Hey guys, we got a pack of rainbow Chips Ahoy. I was going to say they look like a Chips Ahoy. Perfectly round. Is it all it all oh yeah it's rainbow so all of them are colored um we don't use that word anymore but i believe there are some official just chocolate ones as well official yeah chocolate
Starting point is 00:00:58 ones uh i remember when the rainbow ones came out there was a little ad with a kid named kevin who touched who touched the chips. It was a black and white commercial, and everything came to life. I apologize to the listeners. I will be finishing soon. Sounds like my wedding night. Our guest today, a returning guest to the podcast, somebody we haven't seen for many years, but so glad to have her back. It's Karen O'Keefe.
Starting point is 00:01:26 Hello. Hey, guys. Hello. I'm so excited to be back. Oh, I'm so good. Good. Thank you for being back on the podcast. Are you, where are you?
Starting point is 00:01:35 You're in Toronto. We're in the world. Yes, I am in Toronto. And yeah, and it's been, I haven't been, I've been away so long because I wasn't physically in Vancouver, but I see that is not a thing anymore. We don't need to do that. Yeah. Oh, we did have someone,
Starting point is 00:01:49 someone wrote in saying, Oh, you guys should get these people on your show. They're, they're doing a show in Vancouver. And I was like, it doesn't matter anymore. We don't even see each other.
Starting point is 00:01:57 Yeah. I was gonna say, you guys live in the same neighborhood, right? Yeah. Yeah. And once in a while we'll see each other. Dan will be walking his dog or,
Starting point is 00:02:03 you know, I'll be, uh, I'll be hiding in the bushes, you know, I'll be, uh, I'll be hiding in the bushes, hiding in the bushes, playing marbles, nothing gross. Just, uh, it's just something I like to do in the bush. And you still can just keep your distance from each other. Like you see each other, but you haven't been within six.
Starting point is 00:02:18 Yeah. We don't acknowledge each other. Yeah. We have a mutual restraining orders. Mine's a little bit bigger. But we went and caught them at the same time from the same judge. I'm allowed to get a little bit closer to him. Should we get to know us?
Starting point is 00:02:37 Yeah. Get to know us. Get to know us. I don't know how many. i know some of our guests listen yeah yes but but not all of them yeah because we're too dangerous for some people so yeah but karen karen you're a listener yes i'm a fan so uh bumpers one day maybe you too can sit in the seat, which is in my house. Yeah. I've been to a live taping once. Yeah. You guys came to Toronto in the before times.
Starting point is 00:03:13 That was exciting. And I saw you in Toronto, maybe at comedy bar. Yeah. A few times. Yeah. Yeah. Just socially at comedy bar. And then, well, then you've been in Toronto without, not for a podcast like you were there for fringe shows and stuff now karen you are our only guest named karen
Starting point is 00:03:30 uh you mean oh is this true oh what i was listening to the double graham episode that was oh i know i'm the only karen in this zoom yeah you are the only k. I will. I just looked it up and you haven't been on since 2013. Yeah. And it's in that time, the meaning of the word Karen has changed. And let's hear all about it. How has your life changed? Oh, dear. I mean, it's something, you know, you could laugh off and now it's like, OK, OK, it's constant. All right. All right. the only thing is that i mean but i do fit the description i am a white lady in her 40s and uh i guess that's it you're always asking for the manager yeah but i can't legitimately ask for a manager or make a
Starting point is 00:04:17 complaint or something you're like hey landlord i have no hot water stop caring this is karen don't you try and care in me yeah i remember when i was trying to set up my uh album recording one one time i just started like stopping by the bar i wanted to go to i'm like hey is your manager working tonight and they're like no who like who should i tell him who's calling like uh steve say karen i just literally asked to see the manager. Oh, no. Tell him Miss O'Keefe would like to award. Recently, just for work training, we had to do training on privilege and bias and racism in the workplace. Yeah, we had to do training with like a drill press. Yeah, we had to do training with like a drill press. But it was one of them where it was like kind of a check your privilege quiz.
Starting point is 00:05:11 And it's like one of them was like, I have never been mocked for how my name sounds. And I'm like, well, I know what I'm supposed to say, but I am a Karen. I can't, I'm not entirely without mocking. Yeah. The closest we've had is Paul Bay. Yeah, that's right. And his name has changed from just a name too. Yeah,
Starting point is 00:05:28 that's right. Yeah. Baby came a thing, but that's, that's a good thing. I think. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:32 Uh, unless you're a base stopping by to ask for the manager and all of us. Oh, sure. Yeah. Back in square one. I can't, um,
Starting point is 00:05:42 Karen, you, uh, what, what do you do for work at this point? What am I doing? Right now I am working At a vaccine clinic I am a
Starting point is 00:05:51 Comedian in the background and all that stuff But I'm getting paid these days to Work at one of the Mask Immunization clinics in Toronto So we We're kind of winding down a little bit by this point but uh something i did last summer and then i thought this is a one-time thing that will
Starting point is 00:06:10 never happen again we've cured covid by august and uh then it flared up again around new year so it's like yep i guess i'm going back so it's going back to my usual font it's a very uh it's a very now job like it didn't exist two years ago and i hope it won't exist two years from now yeah exactly like you get there you're like okay this is training i'm gonna be able to apply this during the rest of my career yeah and you're thinking like next summer when i'm back here i'm gonna like wait i shouldn't be here but next summer like i'm gonna apply for that job um you didn't have to draw blood. You were just... No, no.
Starting point is 00:06:46 And people were like, my family and stuff were like, what are you doing there? Like, I'm not... They won't let me inject anybody. I am... Graham, when you got your... Do you think they draw blood at these clinics?
Starting point is 00:06:55 Yeah, wait. My lady did. She took some blood and she said, this is for mama, which I was like, okay, what does that mean? I just want some of it.
Starting point is 00:07:08 Yeah, I guess it's easier to just poke something than it is to draw blood. I mean, yeah, you have to withdraw it. Yeah, that's true. You do have to take it out. There's some blood possibly in the transaction. Yeah, they're very quick with the little cotton swab. And I find you don't feel anything. These are one of the least painful needles I've ever had. possibly in the transaction. Yeah, they're very quick with the little cotton swab. Yeah. And I find you don't feel anything.
Starting point is 00:07:26 These are one of the least painful needles I've ever had. Yeah. And since you work there, you probably get discounts. You get, you know. Yeah, yeah. You get free. You're not supposed to get high on your own supply, though. You probably had four or five boosters at this point.
Starting point is 00:07:41 There really was a thing at the end of the day. They're like, shots, shots, shots. We want shots. You know, because they got shots that somebody needs to take so yeah i got my second dose on my first day of work and i'm like well i hope i'm not sick tomorrow because that's a bad look they're like people are not showing up all the time it's fine yeah that's right yeah so that's just end of day yeah they they go out of their way to try not to waste them. Like once they open it up,
Starting point is 00:08:06 it's like, yike, like go into the street. Does anyone have any friends and family that can get here in like the next 30 minutes? No. Wow. Stand by awkwardly or like one guy brought us like three family members and
Starting point is 00:08:15 we had two doses left to like, Ooh, okay. Make a choice. Uh, yeah, I find they are like, if you have a, uh, an appointment that day they're like
Starting point is 00:08:28 yeah that you they give you like a time like two o'clock but yeah but if as long as you show up anytime that day they'll give you yes indeed i know people panic they're like oh i'm supposed to hear 140 we're like oh you don't care like what was just at this point it's like we're we're taking walk-ins it's uh everybody everybody who really wanted one kind of got one already so uh now we're getting teenagers cool loitering yeah they gotta hang out somewhere they're having older people boot for them when we did it in the summer it was like mostly the adults were coming and everybody was so excited like yay finally am i like where i'm getting vaccinated this is a thing but now we're
Starting point is 00:09:08 getting you know five to eleven year olds and this is not their choice no they did not volunteer to come down here they're like yeah they're all five to eleven year olds are anti-vaxxers yeah that's true but you know what you can you can persuade them over to your side if you bring them McDonald's. That's true. Did we ever try that with the convoy? Did we try giving them McDonald's to see if they were just cranky, maybe? That's right. The ones that are screaming, you know, sometimes when they're done, people applaud.
Starting point is 00:09:40 Like, no, don't reward that shitty behavior. Oh, that's true. Yeah. Like, if you applaud after they're done, it makes it thick. Yeah. Bravo. No do actually we know it is we are kind of happy though like oh good you can leave and we're in a big uh convention center so i find it's uh i forgot how much kids love escalators like they just like they're not a fan of needles but they love escalators so it's a really mixed day for them yeah a lot of highs and lows i like escalators i think that my love affair with escalators still continues we went to i took the kids to canadian tire the other day nice uh because we needed a new
Starting point is 00:10:17 helmet for skating because my kids their heads are growing so fast. So weirdly shaped. The escalators at Canadian Tire are just the ramp kind. Yeah. Oh, not steps. Our kids, they loved it. Yeah. That's kid paradise, you kidding? Karen, one of my favorite things that you do is you will often post photos of you playing various roles in the background of television shows and movies.
Starting point is 00:10:49 That's right. My other day job. Yeah. But I love it. I love the celebration of it. I love that you found the frame that you're in. Oh, I love it, too. I love it so much.
Starting point is 00:10:57 And like more than I should. I feel a little embarrassing around friends who are real actors. I'm like, no, no, like, like, I don't get to talk or like, oh, I'll watch for you I'm like, no, no, I don't get to talk. Or like, oh, I'll watch for you now. Like, no, no, that is it. I did a freeze frame of the most exciting part of me being on that show. You don't have to watch it. But also, like, your actor friends, they're given lines and stuff.
Starting point is 00:11:17 You, you just have to be the policewoman in the background. You have to figure out that character in your head. That's right. Yeah. So, if anything, you're the better actor than these actor actors yes like thank you i'm glad you see that yeah how many different how many is the most times that you've been a specific thing like you've been the cop the most i think i want to start yeah like i have a whole on facebook i have a whole album of me just being an extra in the background. But I think I should start a separate me being a cop album.
Starting point is 00:11:46 Yes. I'm very, very cop-like. I like it. I don't have to bring my own clothes. But it's a lot harder to go to the bathroom with all the cop gear. Oh, really? Well, because they always make cops wear like a romper. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:02 You have to take the whole thing off. Yeah. a romper yeah you have to take the whole thing off yeah um what uh yeah have you been like have you been different kinds of cops or all just the same kind of like city cop like mostly yeah and always american cops uh new york is probably the most common one uh are you ever drinking out of those classic new york cups oh yeah Those little Greek ones. Those paper cups. Shoot, no. Now that I think about it, how come I don't have more of those? Yeah, they don't have them anymore.
Starting point is 00:12:31 Just like Starbucks is completely white mopped the floor with them. They're not. I watched a movie from like the 90s and they were drinking about all those cups. And I was like, this is good. This feels right. This feels like the new york i know man before giuliani got in here and cleaned it up it was a cesspool and we loved it yeah that used to be a porn theater that one that's now like an adult theater and an m&m store cbgb
Starting point is 00:12:59 what what's the weirdest extra you have the weirdest thing i've been ah like i've i liked um i was an alien on defiant i was gonna guess alien nice alien yeah like it's like a cop or alien that's i tend to be those um once the what's the weirdest one i was just body parts like uh you were like i was just hands and i was working on a day with everybody else was also body parts someone's like oh i'm the arm that gets killed. And then someone else is like, I'm the foot that steps on the thing. And I'm like, oh, I'm the hands that type. Like, they just, they're just doing insert shots of body.
Starting point is 00:13:34 Because, like, the real actor doesn't need to be there. Oh, right. You weren't, like, dead body parts. So, yeah, I probably could have explained it better. Yeah. So, body double part. Yeah. I was picturing, like, okay.
Starting point is 00:13:43 Not stunt doubles. You had to wear, like like a green leotard everywhere yes i was picturing even more old-timey that everybody was reaching into a set they were all down below like puppeteers oh like uh sesame street yeah exactly um i actually my i should say yeah my favorite job it was the i did um wasn't a, I was a stand-in, not a background actor, but they're very closely related. Uh, I worked three years on Suits. Oh, Suits! Which is really cool.
Starting point is 00:14:12 Yeah, I was a stand-in for a tall, red-headed actress on that show. So I was, I got to be the... Did you ever get to meet... The fake Donna. Fake, hey, I'm fake Donna. Yeah, I was going to say. Did you ever meet fake Meghan Markle? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:26 Uh, I did, and the real one, too. Oh, wow real one my first my first year was her last year on the show but by then it was already like uh do not look directly at the megan markle like she's she's dating somebody very important and he's probably not stopping by set today that's the question we always got like well because a lot of spouses come by and everything you know like oh so and so's wife came by-so's wife came by. But we're like, is Prince Harry here? Like, no, but that's a bodyguard over there. That guy who looks not like a bodyguard. Oh, yeah. He's an unassuming crew member.
Starting point is 00:14:53 Like, I guess. But he probably has skills. Yeah, like good bodyguards are hidden, right? Or maybe you want the show of force. Yeah, I was expecting like a, you know, I don't know, a stereotypical big shaved head beefcake kind of guy. But he was just like a. Yeah, like me. Yeah. He just looked like a crew member who wasn't doing anything just not working he's wearing a black t-shirt and he was middle-aged and uh not very tall and like he's
Starting point is 00:15:14 probably knows yeah he's probably got he can probably do stuff though sure oh yeah he can't i got some lethal training were you like you all assumed it was a guy that was a security guy because oh yeah Did we ever? You just seem going back to the food truck over and over again. Yeah. It's hard to tell on a movie set or a TV set because there's so many people doing nothing. Yeah, that's right. He just looked like, which, is he an unhelpful, like, yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:42 Is he a lazy electrical guy, lazy camera guy? I don't know what he is. Yeah. I was like, someone told me that he was a bodyguard. They could have been pulling my leg. Now that I think about it. Yeah. If Prince Harry had shown up,
Starting point is 00:15:52 would you have been like, hey, we're both redheads. Would you want to go chat? Oh, that would have been your end for sure. Yeah. Yeah. I would have just circled around him weirdly until maybe he noticed.
Starting point is 00:16:03 And then, cause I wouldn't, I would have been shy, I guess, but still standing around. Security, please take care of that woman who keeps walking in a circle around me. Yeah, that was a neat gig. And it ended, I guess, like it ended in 2019. So it's like, well, the pandemic would have probably ended it anyway, I guess. So you're not going back now that things are popping back up or?
Starting point is 00:16:22 We, yeah, things are slowly not. Yeah, things are popping back up or uh we yeah things are slowly not yeah things are slowly coming back right but when it comes back you will do you'll be back in the game yeah oh yeah for sure yeah i don't know how much longer the uh the clinic will last so yeah we get jump back into uh random gigs that come up i hope it goes on i hope we need dose after dose after dose of this stuff i hope that you come back and the first thing that you play is a person who administers shots. Oh, yeah. Somebody in scrubs or something like that.
Starting point is 00:16:52 That would be fun. Full circle. The nurses I've worked with were like, oh, that's so cool. You're an extra. Like, yeah, but I'm just walking around in the background like you're a nurse. And they've all asked me, like, who's your agent? Like, can we apply? Like, actually, yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:04 You get paid more if you're a real and like and they've all asked me like who's your agent like can we apply like actually yeah they you get paid more if you're a real nurse like special skills like they need somebody to like give the lethal injection to the prisoner on that prison show and stuff like that so they don't let people like me do that that's a real skill wow that is cool yeah so man nurses want to do that on their day off so if you're an actor and you and they're shooting a lethal injection scene, you actually have to get injected. I guess so. Or at least look like you know what you're doing. They just put air in there.
Starting point is 00:17:30 Like real paramedics. They always have real paramedics, real firemen, but fake cops. Like, I don't know why they never have real cops playing golf. Oh, weird. Maybe it might have something to do with the amount of training. Yeah. But it's all good. maybe it might have something to do with the amount of training. Yeah. Uh, but,
Starting point is 00:17:46 uh, it's all good. Um, the, uh, did any of the nurses, when they found out you were an extra, did it, were any of the nurses like you extras,
Starting point is 00:17:56 you're the real hero. No, but they should, they should say, don't we? Oh, you, um, think of how empty this scene would
Starting point is 00:18:09 have looked we had we'd have to do like the kevin mccallister like pulling nurses back and forth that are just mannequins um have you ever done any acting have you been like you know spoken on camera that kind of stuff yes once yes uh i was i had one line in a movie so that counts and they didn't give it to me on the day it wasn't like hey you there here's a line it was like i auditioned and i thought well that was a waste of time i went all the way to say that one line and now i'm going home and then i got the part uh i was it was in the movie uh my spy it was uh it's a kid it's kind of a kid's movie is that the one yeah that's right yeah so he was uh the scene was it was like it was a grade five class like bring your parent or special friend to work day and they talk about
Starting point is 00:18:58 their careers and so i was just part of a montage of i was talking about my job at the airline and we schedule over 3 000 flights a day and i was like i didn't get to say anything funny and then he was all like i'm not a hitman i mean he is how i picture a uh a bodyguard yeah oh for sure yeah he um It's funny. I feel like wrestlers, in order to get to the level of The Rock, where they're making the films they want to make, I feel like they'll have to pass through the silly. They'll have to go and do a silly role. So that people are like, yeah, I see him now as being like The Rock
Starting point is 00:19:42 was the tooth fairy in a movie. Yeah. Oh, yeah. being like uh the rock was the the tooth fairy in a movie yeah oh yeah one wasn't i know vin diesel's not a uh not a wrestler but the vin diesel did one that i thought was the tooth fairy one he did one that was oh what was it called was it the pacifier yes he was a babysitter maybe excellent i was gonna say does vin diesel have a sense of humor like does he poke fun at himself i guess he did he did the pacifier yeah he all i know about him is that he's a he's a very caring lover according to uh a book that i read many years ago yeah and he's a singer oh yeah that's right he's a singer. He does all his stunts in the Fast and Furious movies. I've done that
Starting point is 00:20:32 where I've gone and auditioned for a one sentence role. The one, the shortest one that I ever went to was two words. It was the lake. What's the context? Like, where is the dead body yeah it's like something's like where is he and then i point at the lake and say the lake and they were like thank you no thank you yeah dog day when they say thank you with that tone or it's like uh
Starting point is 00:20:57 you weren't even pointing in the direction of the lake you idiot and then i i often do and the stuff i usually get is commercials so and a lot of the a lot of them are not speaking so i'm just what are you in commercials almost like being an extra uh various things i the auditions i get the most are for mom because i'm in the karen age group yeah and then those are the ones i never get because it's like if there's kids there no thank you we can tell you don't like kids yeah we can i can be a mom with off-screen family my career is too important that's that's my line so i've uh yeah trying to think i've got i got one where i was a i haven't seen i haven't seen
Starting point is 00:21:39 this one but other people have i was just a unsuccessful contestant in a cooking show so i'm just like giving a are you kidding me look and nice this is good i was the the and the one where i actually got to speak it was a bell commercial where me and just a guy were sitting on a couch and i'm all like oh my belt my my tv package is so much better than your package and which is different words but but i liked how it's like okay we weren't like we could have been roommates we could have been siblings we could have been gotten us like you're looking for a lack of specificity yeah yeah yeah we're just two people sitting on the couch and i have a superior cable package so yeah that's the basis of you and that person's friendship yeah that's right i just wanted him to know that in real life what's your cable package i have a digital antenna i have just one of those things you stick to the wall
Starting point is 00:22:29 and what do you what do you get all out of it i get um mostly just the basic canadian ones i get my cbc and my global and all and everything else is apps and there yeah everything else is streaming but it's a to watch the news. You can watch, I don't know. I think Global's got America's Got Talent. Or it's sister programming, America's Got Talent Extreme. What's that? What?
Starting point is 00:22:55 I haven't heard of that one. It's America's Got Talent, but it's outside and it's all extreme sports. There was a guy that went down a four-story ramp on a wheelchair. And people doing motorcycle stunts and stuff like that. Like there was a guy that went down like a four story ramp on a wheelchair and, uh, you know, people doing motorcycle stunts and stuff like that. There's going to be Canada's got talent. Finally.
Starting point is 00:23:12 Is there, Oh, it's not already. Well, maybe there is, but there's a, if they've done it before, there's a new one.
Starting point is 00:23:19 And do you want to know who the judges are? Considering that how many of the America's got talent judges were not american yeah i'm gonna say that uh because i'm in cal's in the extreme one and he has no business being there for real who simon cal he's in the extreme one oh okay i think howie mandel is in the canadian one howie mandel okay okay trish stratusus. Sure. Oh, yeah. Okay. Sure. No Jan Arden, but good idea. Alanis Morissette? Nope.
Starting point is 00:23:49 Okay. Lilly Singh. Oh, Lilly Singh. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Okay. I don't know who this is. Lindsay L.
Starting point is 00:23:56 Oh, she's the host, so she's not a judge. And the other judge is Cardinal Oficial. Nice. Oh, okay. Great. Yeah. I don't know what the prize is. Like in the American one, you get, you do a show, you like get a residency in Vegas.
Starting point is 00:24:11 Yeah. And you get a million dollars. On the extreme one, you only get $500,000, which is crazy. And on the Canadian one, you get a big coat. From the Burlington Coat Factory. Yeah. And a residency in Burlington. factory. Yeah. And residency in Burlington. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:27 At Niagara Falls. You perform at the Vaughn. Yuck. Yuck. You've got a weekly standing gig. Have you ever been to Vaughn to do a comedy? Oh, me?
Starting point is 00:24:45 I have. Yeah. Uh, I don't know if it's still there anymore. Like the club, not the town. No, the town's gone.
Starting point is 00:24:52 Vaughn's done. I do remember a Godzilla coming to Vaughn. Uh, been a while. So yeah, I'm pretty sure the, a lot of clubs, uh,
Starting point is 00:25:03 they, they're not, it's very rare to find an original Yucks Club. Everything used to be something else. Right. Oh, yeah. This Vaughn one, you were in a complex, if I recall correctly. Yes.
Starting point is 00:25:15 Oh, and I heard you mentioning it had the dueling piano guys. Yeah, yeah. Used to be there. So, yeah, so you've played that one, right? Yes. Yeah, I played that one. Check those guys out. Spent some time across the street at Dave & Buster's.
Starting point is 00:25:26 Oh, okay. And a few of them, like there's a few, and they're attached to like, I don't know if it's owned by the Wendell Clarks chain, but there's a... Oh, that's right. The Yucks in Oshawa is also attached to a Wendell Clarks. What is a Wendell Clarks?
Starting point is 00:25:41 Oh, yeah, it's a chain of maybe three restaurants i don't know it's very small chain local uh it's a um and wendell clark is a former hockey player yeah um and his face is on the logo or on the menu or something chunky soup commercials oh maybe oh wow so he was ready he was ready with a food brand yeah yeah and uh yeah just a restaurant that serves like pub food and stuff. Yeah. And he's, I remember there being a picture of him like about to eat a burger. And I remember thinking like,
Starting point is 00:26:12 that would be impossible to get your mouth wide enough open. Cause it's like a picture. Perfect hamburger. Just watch me. He turns it over like a cob of corn and just eats it. That way. I, we don't have uh our local um uh local sports celebrities don't have restaurants here they have trevor linden fitness yeah oh okay
Starting point is 00:26:36 you still have steve nash it's on brand i don't know if that's still happening steve nash had its own fitness and then uh we've got more more than one restaurant or only one restaurant called Joe Forte's, which is named after a famous lifeguard. Yeah. And that's it. I think that rounds out the list. Wait, I haven't heard of a lot of famous lifeguards. What was he famous for?
Starting point is 00:26:57 He was the man who taught Vancouver to swim. Yeah. He was like the famous, like he taught big classes of people how to swim. And he was, I don't remember like where, what. He was from Barbados or something. And he, yeah, I don't know what beach he was on in Vancouver, but he was like old timey. You know, when men wore the one piece of wool swimsuits. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:27:20 Wool being the most versatile material at the time. Yeah, it's just funny when somebody like Tim Hortons never really worked too much with the actual restaurant. I get the feeling like Wendell Clark's showing up all the time at his restaurants. I bet every time a new one opens, he will probably be there. He's still alive and everything. Yeah. I get the feeling like Wendell Clark's showing up all the time at his restaurants. I bet every time a new one opens, he will probably be there. He's still alive and everything. Yeah. Have you ever been to an opening of a restaurant or a mall or anything like that? Oh, I did go to the opening of a Wahlburgers.
Starting point is 00:27:58 And Donnie Wahlberg was there. Donnie? Yes, Donnie. And then one of his brothers is a a chef one of the non-famous lovers so uh i didn't know about my friend uh was visiting me from edmonton and she had like 24 hours in toronto i'm like yeah what do you want to do she's like there's an opening of a walberger like what is any of that this is why i came here i'm only here for 24 hours because of this and she was a fan of blue blood so it's like
Starting point is 00:28:25 we gotta like oh okay and it was happening and donnie walberg will be there like okay so does is blue blood shot in toronto no okay looks like it might be nothing well it just looks like you could have played a cop on it because we went to the we stood in line at the end so the physical building wasn't open yet but they were just uh giving away burgers in a bag and uh and doing a photo you can do a photo op so there's a picture of like me and her and donnie walberg and the chef walberg nice uh so the i so i haven't been in the actual building it was built later i assume that when they find this opening it was supposed to be built oh they weren't like putting shovels in the ground, like on the roof of somewhere. Yeah, it was.
Starting point is 00:29:11 It was on the roof of something and it was raining, but the burgers were still very good. So I went there once. Quality. I went to the wall burgers in Toronto. I assume there's only one. Mm hmm. Yes. As far as I know, down by who was near second city and gretzky's restaurant oh yeah
Starting point is 00:29:25 gretzky's yeah gotta have one of those which is now closed down i think well there was a when i was a kid there was a chain of restaurants called the grapes it was a don cherry oh restaurant but maybe it wasn't maybe it was just one in calgary but i remember going there and being like i don't know about a whole restaurant dedicated to this guy. Do you remember, I was thinking back about old stores. Mostly I was thinking about old computer stores. We used to have a place called Doppler Computer Software. And before that, there was a place called Egghead Discount Software.
Starting point is 00:30:00 We never had any special, well, I mean, probably we did, but. I was very tempted to buy an egghead discount software hat on ebay but honestly i'm not gonna wear that hat unless you start your own egghead computer shop hasn't been around for a long time tram um have you been to the opening of anything graham yeah i, I was on tour. I can't remember the town. It was a small town, and I was there the day that the A&W was open, and it was like Mardi Gras.
Starting point is 00:30:33 Everybody in the town was there. The costumed root bear came out and shook hands and took photos. And Graham. Oh, boy. This is a tough question. Do you know what A&W stands for? Hey, you know what Karen listens to the show? I do. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:30:50 Karen, do you know? I don't know what it is. Oh, neither do I. Oh, okay. Because we want Dave to tell us. That's one that may haunt us. We may never know. Well, I once went to Ambogus and Whoop Beer. Yes.
Starting point is 00:31:05 We this past weekend I once went to hamburgers and whoop beer. Yes. Uh, we, uh, this past weekend, uh, the fried chick. I think it's Filipino fried chicken chain. Uh,
Starting point is 00:31:15 Jollibee. Oh, Jollibee. Sure. I'm not saying right. Uh, opened here. Jump in and say it incorrectly. Uh,
Starting point is 00:31:24 uh, it opened here this weekend and apparently there was like like lineups every morning at six in the morning for it to open at nine to have fried chicken at nine in the morning now you put it with some waffles it's basically breakfast yeah that's that's true. I would never stand in line ever for a thing to open. I did it when I was 19, I think. Whenever the Phantom Menace came out, I lined up to go see that. I was so pissed off after. But yeah, I've never lined up for a debut thing, even to get a phone or that kind of thing.
Starting point is 00:32:08 I bet I have. I'm sure I have, but I can't remember. I think it was maybe once. It's the kind of thing that you do it once, you never do it again. Unless you're the kind of person who likes that. There's definitely a breed of people who line up for the new iPhone or something or the new. Yes. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:24 And it was like, it used to be if iPhone or something or the new. Yes. Yeah. And it was like, it used to be, if you were going to buy tickets to something. Yeah. Like music. Oh, you know what? My,
Starting point is 00:32:31 I think my sister was working in like publicity and she got, uh, she managed to get me passes to when the Krispy Kreme donuts opened in like the, before it opened, like the, like press only, donut uh tour i love the idea of a press gallery like oh we're okay we're gonna do the scrum everybody yeah we're gonna do the junket with the donut and the uh we went and i just remember being like, there's so many donuts to choose from.
Starting point is 00:33:07 And they all sucked except for that. Just the main one they do. Yeah. I didn't know they had other flavors. Yeah, that's the thing. It's like no one knows they have other flavors. The press tried to report it, but people don't care. They don't want the real story.
Starting point is 00:33:24 I remember when you couldn't get them here, that and a Red Bull wasn't available in Canada at one point. Yeah. It was too, too much for us, I guess. I remember dating a guy who like back in 2003, he would like,
Starting point is 00:33:35 like bring back like a donut, bring back a Krispy Kreme and a Red Bull from his trip to Seattle or something. I'm like, that's cool. Things like that. Yeah. You know, anything from like, that's cool. Things like that. Yeah. You know, anything from...
Starting point is 00:33:47 Trader Joe's seems to be living... Yeah, Trader Joe's, Target. Oh. I mean, we had Target here and we didn't appreciate it. Yeah, we fucked it up. Yeah, we did it all wrong. We can't have nice things. Yeah. The reporting on it was so bad that people were like, forget this. Let's go.
Starting point is 00:34:04 I did work the like maybe work the opening of a target at my uh catering job they had uh us how like the the target dog came to take pictures with the kids and stuff like that and they hired and as a banquet server so we're serving hors d'oeuvres and stuff like that like this is not what target is like to kind of corral the kids and so like we're wearing silly costumes oh yeah it was near halloween does the target dog have a target on his head yeah yeah i can't remember his name like bullseye or something it's a bull terrier like um spuds mckenzie i think yeah i don't know his name was also his dog on cherry's dog was the same yeah what was that dog's
Starting point is 00:34:43 name blue blue blue oh I know that. Yeah. Because he didn't add, so he like sold batteries or some shit in the 80s. And he was like, right, Blue? And the dog barked. It's a good dog. It's a great dog. Yeah. So beefy and just a weird shaped head. Yeah. So do you guys, Karen, do you
Starting point is 00:35:00 remember Spuds McKenzie from when you were a kid? Like beer commercials? Yeah. Yeah. Bud Light, maybe? I don't think so. He was a party you remember spuds mckenzie from when you were a kid like beer commercials yeah yeah bud light maybe i don't think so he was a party animal the only reference the first reference i knew to that was funky cold medina they referenced the dog in that but yet i didn't know that song but too young to see beer commercials my friend had a calendar of it and it just was so funny it was him and a bunch of girls in every yeah it was like women were attracted to this dog yeah like he'd be wearing a hawaiian shirt and he'd be at like a 50s diner and uh everybody was having a great
Starting point is 00:35:37 time he was yeah everywhere that was the best time for america that's the time they're trying to get back to, you know? Yeah, it feels that way. Yeah. The Spuds McKenzie era. Everyone's so triggered. Why can't I say it? That target dog was named Bullseye, I guess. All right.
Starting point is 00:35:59 You did your research. Did you get a picture taken with him? Oh, I don't think I did. Oh, shame. Because he's never coming back. I guess not. you did your research did you get a picture taken with him? oh I don't think I did shame because he's never coming back I guess not do they yeah of course if he passes away
Starting point is 00:36:13 they just get another dog like him and paint a target on that dog I guarantee you it wasn't a dog it was just they got a local dog and painted him up there's no singular target dog. Oh my.
Starting point is 00:36:27 I hadn't even thought of that. I just assumed he came up from the US. They just got a local dog. They don't know if it's good with kids. They got him from a no-kill shelter and they said then they dropped him off at a kill shelter afterwards.
Starting point is 00:36:45 Here's some beer for you guys to take care of. Yeah, I've never gone to. Trying to think of a restaurant that I went to. Yeah, I guess it was Don Cherry's is the only one that was like a celeb restaurant. And I lived in Calgary, too. I don't remember a Cherry's being there. It used to be. It was off McLeod Trail. There was a complex that
Starting point is 00:37:10 had a comic book store called Tramps in the Southeast. And there was a Safeway there. And on the other side of the Safeway was Grapes. Which I didn't understand because I thought it was Grapes and then his name was Don Cherry. And I was like, why is it all called cherries?
Starting point is 00:37:26 And we'll never know. The only other celebrity restaurant I've been to is in the Toronto airport and it's Roger Mookings, whatever that is. Do you know who that is? What? No. Is his name Roger Mooking?
Starting point is 00:37:40 Yeah. Wasn't he from Bass is Bass? Is that the same guy? He played in the band bass's bass with ivana santilli and uh the other guy yeah yeah the other guy uh and then he moved on to have a uh food network show and he has a toronto airport restaurant i think you've made it as a restaurant if you have a if you have an airport version of your restaurant. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:05 But if you only have an airport version of the restaurant, the inverse is also true. That you chin in jetty is the other member of basis. Base chin in jetty. Everybody chin. Karen, do you know basis base? I do not.
Starting point is 00:38:19 I'm sorry. That was a nineties. It has two different spellings of base in the name. Oh, that's right. A little bit of beat box. What was their hit song? That was the 90s. It has two different spellings of bass in the name. Oh, that's right. A little bit of beatboxing. What was their hit song? You know that I cry. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:32 For you every day. And then Santella, she went on to have a solo venture. Didn't she? Sure. It wasn't a restaurant, though. No, only so many people can open restaurants I'm shocked when anybody opens a restaurant because it's such a hard thing to do
Starting point is 00:38:51 I don't understand how that message hasn't gotten through frankly going to a restaurant is such a hard thing to do especially because I smoke and I need to take my table outside. Uh, can't even smoke on the patio anymore. Oh man. Let's get back to that Spuds McKenzie era.
Starting point is 00:39:14 You could smoke. I guess. Yeah. Oh my God. Yeah. That, I guess restaurants had smoking sections, but it didn't occur to me that people would smoke in them.
Starting point is 00:39:28 Like smoke while you eat. Yeah i guess between courses yeah or between bites just have one burning the whole time yeah um these ribs don't taste smoky enough i find when i go to toronto or new York, I see a lot more smokers than I do in Vancouver. It's like almost unimaginable when you smell cigarette smoke in Vancouver. You're like, what the hell? Oh, okay. But Toronto, I feel like that's still a pretty big smoke in town, right? Have I got that wrong? Yes.
Starting point is 00:39:58 Yeah, I know. I just haven't thought of it. I guess I don't see them because they're outside. Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm indoorsy guess i don't see them because they're outside oh yeah i'm indoorsy i don't know yeah they're not at your house per se so hey karen we come in smoke we got kicked out of the rec center yeah swish la won't let us dine in there anymore i'm trying to think if like what what i've compared yeah toronto to like smoking white like what maybe there's less smoking here than a small town but
Starting point is 00:40:31 more smoking than vancouver or like yeah maybe your lifestyle maybe that's right maybe like you go to a small town everybody's still smoking nobody's vaping there in a small town um they're sucking down on chili dogs and uh i was i saw a picture on reddit the other day that was like uh these three people with giant vape cloud like to a woman in a wedding dress is it a wedding yeah and it was like our vape themed wedding shoot looked weird and i was like why did you have a vape themed wedding shoot and like their faces are obscured it's just like a smokestack coming out of their yeah this is the happiest day of my life we want to we want everyone to know we vaped yeah and yeah that's how we met was at a
Starting point is 00:41:16 vaping conference that was one thing i saw a guy vaping the other day and he was just you just hold the vape like anything else like when someone's smoking and and i feel like that's a learned skill like how to hold a cigarette without looking like looking like you know how to do it right yeah yeah like the hands are too stiff or yeah but like vaping you're just it's just like you're holding your phone yeah it's uh i haven't seen a lot of vaping in movies but then i watched euphoria and there's vaping galore in that show and also penises a lot of penises in that show careful what you suck on am i right yeah those things should have a warning all right
Starting point is 00:42:00 oh there's so many penis stores now in every corner yeah well i smell mango penises everywhere yeah and they all have uh you know hilarious names yeah rock around the cock and yeah can i this is where i buy my penis juice i gotta refill my penis juice i just get the cartridges yeah yeah i uh and then you a lot of them you have to charge you have to plug them in with usb and uh man it makes for some awkward wedding nights especially if you're sure but especially if you had a vape themed penis shoot surely there's been vape uh gender reveal. That feels like it's certainly been a thing.
Starting point is 00:42:48 What would be fun is seeing somebody vape out their candles on their birthday cake. That would be fun. Yeah, send us all your... Actually, I want people to send us their vape challenges and we'll do them all month. Yeah, that's right. This is going to be vape month here on the podcast.
Starting point is 00:43:03 And we'll vape anything. It doesn't matter if it's's like i'll vape a cantaloupe i'll vape you know what else what else well that's the main one yeah you know uh football leather you know these is scents that people freshly cut grass i'll vape all the shapes i'll do star i'll do flower have you ever vaped karen i have not no no i don't see why three of us yeah yeah i've vaped before i've had a gram yeah i can see you yeah yeah just to see see what it's all about it's very satisfying like very open to new experiences like yeah yeah yeah exactly i like it when they do it when people do it with like a bubble when they mix vaping and bubbles oh that is cool have you ever seen that yeah that's fun for the kids right they hold the bubble and then they blow in it and the kids are like yay now now give me a turn not me
Starting point is 00:43:57 uh you know when i when they're kids now when i was a kid you had to spin the bottle now you spin the vape and whoever whoever points out you gotta vape your vape into their mouth oh that's so gross the euphoria baby that's what they're teaching us um dave what's going on with you man are you caught up on euphoria or no no i watched the first couple episodes of second season and then. Did you watch the first season? Yeah. Oh, okay. Well, that's great. Yeah. How about you? Do you know Euphoria, Karen?
Starting point is 00:44:34 I do not. It's on HBO. Okay. Which would be... It's about young people doing drugs and such. Yeah, it's not a little bit of Crave and it's about young people doing drugs and such
Starting point is 00:44:46 yeah it's young drugs yeah it's got Zendaya it's got Zendaya you know a really talented young cast
Starting point is 00:44:57 and it's about you know the trials and tribulations of being a teenager yeah sometimes they need they hire they need cops they don. They need cops.
Starting point is 00:45:06 They don't need cops. They do need body parts though. So I was, here's what's going on with me. I went to, I went down to the local shopper's drug mart the other day. Cause I had a hankering for uh all dressed chips oh sure this is a famous this is a famous canadian food yeah rippled that's you got to get the ruffles yes yeah yeah that's that's the winner uh and i went and the shelves were bare right and there yes there was an empty chip shelf yesterday, too, at the grocery store.
Starting point is 00:45:47 There were no chips at the Shoppers Drug Mart. I actually took a picture of what they had left because they were like. Oh, yeah. What's left? What kind of weird combination of flavors is like turnip and oil or something like that? There was like a bag of Miss Vicky's jalapeno. Okay. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:03 I can see that being. There was a weird a weird dorito uh dorito weirds it's not even a flavor and then i was like oh they don't have all dressed well you know what i was gonna get the full big bag and i was like oh i'll just get one of the personal sized bags the snack bags and went over overall those were gone too all of everything was gone except i ended up getting a bag of bold barbecue doritos apparently i don't know if this is connected but maybe it is in pei they a lot of the potatoes couldn't be shipped to america because of potato wart oh so they gave away a lot of the potatoes to just like people in PEI could come
Starting point is 00:46:47 by and fill up any container and take as many potatoes as they want. Oh, well, that's what I read was that the, there was a dispute between the Loblaws company that owns, uh, everything in Canada and, uh,
Starting point is 00:47:02 the Lays corporation. Oh, they've had a falling out. They had a falling out. There was someone wants to raise prices and someone says, Canada and the Lays Corporation. Oh, they've had a falling out. They had a falling out. There was someone wants to raise prices and someone says, no, you can't. You're the one thing. The price of chips must never go up. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:47:17 Chips are inflation proof. Or if you, if we pay more for chips, we'll have to raise the prices. And frankly, our margins are razor thick whatever the opposite i don't know it's the brooms brooms to candle thing isn't it the blah blahs is the western family that's like the richest family in canada oh are they yeah oh they're they're up there for sure yeah yeah because like in bc the richest guy is Jim Patterson, who looks exactly like Mr. Burns. Yeah. Who's the richest guy in Ontario? Who does everybody hate out there?
Starting point is 00:47:53 Is it Kevin O'Leary? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, shoot. I would say it's probably the Westons or the Rogerses. Yeah. Oh, the Rogerses. The Rogerses.
Starting point is 00:48:02 Yeah. And they come with a built-in family drama there's yeah oh yeah that's right there was a whole fighting for supremacy now that you know the the patriarch has passed away so it's a mess the next generation yeah yeah the um uh i've only seen that type of family uh portrayed in movies i don't know anybody who had rich enough relatives to be like, let's get in there. I think, if anything, it's like, let's get out of here. Their debt is going to come our way. I think the Weston family are the fourth richest Canadians.
Starting point is 00:48:41 Jim Patterson in there at all? The Irvings up there? The Irvings? there? The Irvings James Irving This is from Statista.com Yep Reliable source As of 2020
Starting point is 00:48:52 The Westons are worth 8.3 billion James Irving is 6.1 billion Chip Wilson Lululemon Magnet is 5.5 Jim Patterson is 5.4. David Thompson and family are the richest at 39 million. Do you think they ever get together, all these people, and have like, watch human cockfights or something like that?
Starting point is 00:49:19 Is that what you call euphoria? Anyway, so these wealthy fat cats aren't letting me get chips so i but they did the one thing that was not sold out was all their crappy house brand chips you know what i had a house brand chip at canadian tire and those kick ass oh yeah yeah so next time you're in i think they're called like kevin's or something and it's like a surfing potato anyways their ripple chips rule uh so this so this company the the lob the weston family i hope i'm right about that uh this disgusting family their brand of chips that they sell in uh shoppers drug mart everything is loads of the name
Starting point is 00:50:09 of it of every chip is loads of sour cream and onion loads they're these people are disgusting their house brand of ice cream is like it literally says cream first cream first vanilla these people are just obsessed uh so i got but i got there loads of uh all dressed chips and you have to immediately pour them out and get rid of the package because it was so disgusting and they were they weren't very good uh and then so i ordered uh i had to order some groceries online at a different store at Save On Foods, and I ordered Ruffles all-dressed chips. And then when I got my order, I checked my receipt and said, oh, they had to substitute a different brand of all-dressed chips. So they gave me the old Dutch all-dressed chips. And they were called splooges of, yeah. But then when I got home, they had given me both.
Starting point is 00:51:14 So I had all three kinds of all-dressed chips. So I did a little taste test. Oh, yeah. Did you blindfold yourself? I guess you didn't know which one was where. Yeah. And I laid it down on my hand so it felt asleep. Just so it felt like
Starting point is 00:51:27 someone else was feeding me these chips. And then I, so number one chip is the Ruffles all dress chips. Okay, so that still reigns supreme. Yeah. Number two is the old Dutch. It's not ruffleduffled i don't know what it's really going for
Starting point is 00:51:48 and then number three distant third is the loads the loads brand yeah karen what's your favorite chip salt and vinegar salt and vinegar what though lays oh what kind of uh what whose brand oh yeah salt and vinegar but they're not created equal yeah that's right uh i guess i go for the cheap one i go for like the no-name brand it's like a you might get like a dollar like it might be a dollar for a bag yeah okay like the actual no-name like yellow yeah i think it's a no-name from uh i've never had them i wonder if they're good i bet they are but yeah and i don't bet they are I feel like I don't need to escalate it I don't need to like The Miss Vickies are weird
Starting point is 00:52:28 They're one flavor Oh no is it Miss Vickies that has like black pepper Something in black pepper Those rule They slap I stab them They're a bop The all dressed That's like a canadian a famous canadian
Starting point is 00:52:47 style of chip yeah yes but i believe it's yeah when i was growing up i the famous style of canadian chip was ketchup that's right i think they're both but i don't think no one talks about kind of they're kind of similar i feel like they're yeah very closely related chips no one talks about ketchup anymore no but they're still out there you can still get you can get loads of ketchup yeah ketchup you only hear about if it's a canada versus u.s thing like oh we're proud of our ketchup chips they're very canadian but canadians we don't talk about it amongst ourselves no we're not talking about like yeah that's right yeah like i think when i went to ireland as a teenager it was a rare
Starting point is 00:53:30 site to see somebody drinking guinness like i'm sure people do but i never saw wow oh yeah because everybody's drunk on whiskey over there yes yeah absolutely and they yeah they all wear uh wool knit sweaters. And then the women are all pregnant all the time. Yeah. Good Lord. If you try to stop a singalong of Danny boy. Oh boy. The pipes.
Starting point is 00:53:55 Yeah. Yeah. We, that kind of thing. The Canadian thing is embarrassing. I can almost think of no Canadian food that we should be really proud of. Like it's all stuff that's bad for you. And you're like, Oh yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:09 No, no, it's pretty good. Maple syrup. Whenever. Like what is Canadian cuisine? Aside from the fact that it's all junk food and desserts. And I mean,
Starting point is 00:54:22 it's, I mean, it's good. Like, like, like, like bear paw, maybe? Bear claw?
Starting point is 00:54:26 Oh, yeah. Bear claw, for sure. Is that Canadian? I don't know. Oh, yeah. Beaver tail. That's Canadian. Maybe that's what I'm thinking of.
Starting point is 00:54:34 Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. By catering job, we were hosting some American delegates for some reason. We had a poutine bar. So it's like, as many toppings as you want. And they're like, what the hell is this? You can put whatever you want on it like but what there's curds like we
Starting point is 00:54:49 don't understand they're like you just like make them like okay well i guess the classic would be gravy and cheese curds and fries and uh then we have all this other stuff that has no business being on there but yeah i'm not convincing anyone that this sounds good. It's actually a good idea. Like a subway style poutine restaurant. I mean, that's what, what do you call them? So kind of is the,
Starting point is 00:55:14 what's his name? Like herbs, poutine or something like that. Oh, smokes, smokes or smokes. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:20 We used to have one. Not anymore. No. Um, they still, they're still out there in Ontario. You can get a smokes poutine for sure probably here one of those things to where he obviously
Starting point is 00:55:32 owned the company and thought that he should be the mascot of the company yeah I don't know who smoke is but his face is on it oh he's you know what he's Canada's richest person smoke it's me smoke Oh he's You know what He's Canada's richest person Smoke The smoke empire It's me smoke
Starting point is 00:55:48 From smokes poutine People say we don't have Cuisine here in Canada But let me tell you You can put anything On poutine Anyway So I had a little
Starting point is 00:56:01 Chip battle at my house I have solidarity With the Lays Corporation Someone's gonna tell me They're even worse Anyway, so I had a little chip battle at my house. Chip off. I have solidarity with the Lays Corporation. Someone's going to tell me they're even worse, but whatever. Yeah, that's right. You rearranged the letters. It's a sleigh. Yeah, that's true.
Starting point is 00:56:16 Sleigh Queen. What's going on with you? Not too much, but in the last couple of weeks weeks i've been trying to not wake up and instantly look at my phone or computer like because it's tempting to like the second you wake up to be like oh phone what's going on what's going on phone things happened overnight yeah yeah let's check the trending twitters let's check the reddits let's check the emails and the and the instagrams so i'm trying to not to do that first thing in the morning so what i've been doing instead is i've been listening to the radio i wake up in the morning i put on the radio
Starting point is 00:56:56 and i just let then i just lie there and let it take me away what station news 11 30 oh news 11 30 that was nobody's guess i was gonna ask like do they still have those wild guys in the morning but maybe not on that channel no not on that channel well yeah but i was like do those guys exist those morning is it traffic on the ones that kind of thing that kind of thing yeah and those those morning djs do still very much exist and uh they're always trying to call somebody and give them money or waiting for people to call them so they can give them money that's the big draw but yeah news 11 30 here's the weird thing about the news team is you would assume that at the station would just be one guy delivering all the news like yeah why would they
Starting point is 00:57:44 have other people in for just a segment of the news all the news like yeah why would they have other people in for just a segment of the news but that's exactly what they have they have a news guy sports guy weather guy market person and a traffic person so the market person is like i just went to the market uh here's what i got i went i went thrifting today yeah i went to the market all out of lays i report everything yeah i'm the market guy on this show um but yeah the uh i how how in like half an hour how many times does the market guy talk uh the market everything is on like a certain number of loop yeah yeah and so like i listen to one loop and then then i'm done how long is the loop like probably 15 minutes 15 to 20 minutes i guess and then it just loops back around there's nothing new
Starting point is 00:58:40 that's happened in the markets at the last time um but yeah it's a bunch of different people maybe they're on other shows or something maybe and that's oh sure there's some sister stations maybe like maybe news guy is doing the news on that channel and then he's going yeah drops in the by the rock station to also give them some news i got too much news and so i thought i'd drop by yeah i could give you some rock news uh zz top uh what are they uh well they were they were around for a long time um but like it's also uh it feels wholesome it feels wholesome to listen to the radio you know going on the internet right away.
Starting point is 00:59:25 And it is a radio? Is it a clock radio? No, I do have it on an app. Aha. I know, that's true. They get you. They get you coming and going. I thought about buying a radio alarm, but where the fuck would I put it?
Starting point is 00:59:41 You know what I mean? I would never get it on the clock. I have a clock radio that I just look at for, use it for looking at the time, but I can never find, I'm always, I can never not have it between stations. Like,
Starting point is 00:59:52 it's always fuzzy. Like when you're adjusting the dial and then it sounds good. And then you step away and it gets fuzzy again. Like I just, I've never been able to find the right. It's weird that that was the way that everyone was kind of okay with that for a hundred years. Yeah. Um, that that was the way that everyone was kind of okay with that for a hundred years yeah um but it's still there radio's still there they said it would die like numerous times over and it
Starting point is 01:00:14 still still exists and you know i'm one of the people propping it up i like i like the news for your service yes thank you very much. I went, I, we had, when we got the new car last year, we got, uh, I signed up for Sirius XM radio.
Starting point is 01:00:33 Oh yeah. And it was like $5 a month. And then, uh, and then I got an email saying, yeah, uh, now that your trial is over,
Starting point is 01:00:41 uh, it'll be going up to $25 a month that I went to cancel on their website. Nowhere you can cancel on their website. Yeah. So you have to call them. And I was like, I know how this works. So I will call. I'll say I'm going to cancel.
Starting point is 01:00:54 They're going to give me a deal. I'll still have Sirius XM. And so I called them up and they were like, yeah, oh, I understand your concerns. Well, that was just a trial offer. So now we'd like to, if you'd like to keep it, we could maybe work with you and get you $12 a month. And I was like, no, I don't like it that much. Yeah. Yeah, I can get radio for free.
Starting point is 01:01:23 Okay. Yeah, I can get radio for free. Okay, well, maybe we can give you, if you want fewer stations, we can give you a lower price. And I'm like, no, I want everything for $1. They were like, well, they didn't think I was prepared to walk away, but I walked away. Oh, wow. Yeah, I had a subscription to the New York Times and the Globe and Mail. And I know they've both lapsed, but they still send me an email in the morning and in the afternoon every single day. New York Times, I went to cancel and they gave me a better deal. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:58 Oh, okay. That's right. Just from a chat online. I didn't even have to call anyone. Yeah. Yes. They're about reader retention, whereas the Globe and Mail, I don't even have to call anyone. Yeah. Yes. That's there about reader retention. Whereas the global mail,
Starting point is 01:02:07 I don't know what the hell they're doing over there. So he said, Graham, that they email you twice a day with news or. Okay. Like, please stay, please sign up.
Starting point is 01:02:18 Pretty morning. Come on back, man. Today's headline. We need your money. We miss you. We just bought Wordle. We spent all our wad on Wordle.
Starting point is 01:02:33 Yeah, we're going to ruin Wordle for everybody. Should we move on to some overheards? Okay. Oh, wait, you know what? What? How about some business? Oh, shit. herds oh okay oh wait you know what what how about some business oh shit before we go into over herds let's take care of a little bit of things that we call business but it's singular
Starting point is 01:02:54 so i shouldn't have said things it's a little bit of things yeah we got a jumbotron message if anyone here would like it's our first jumbotron message of the year there's not a big demand for these uh but if anyone out there wants one you know where to get it you know yeah exactly go to maximumfun.org jumbotron this one is for leslie and it is from samantha graham take it away leslie cheers to you following your dreams of a life consistent sunshine life of consistent sunshine and access to a pool Arizona will never have New York's bagels but who cares when you're sipping margaritas on a bagel pool floaty thank you for introducing me to stop podcasting yourself 10 years ago couldn't imagine a better send-off than a message from Dave and Graham. Yeah. Yay. That's nice. Arizona will never have New York's bagels,
Starting point is 01:03:50 but New York will have Arizona's iced tea. That's right. Yeah. That's the way the trade deal was worked out. Yeah. Meets Lake. So, yes. Indeed, Leslie.
Starting point is 01:04:03 Enjoy that state that we love to call Arizona. When you reunite in Arizona, bring some bagels with you. Bring some of those New York delicious bagels. Yeah, come on, Samantha. Yeah, exactly. Don't hoard them. Yeah. What are you, just playing ring toss with bagels every day in New York?
Starting point is 01:04:24 Forget it, your friend Leslie? Now it's time to move on to some overheards. Most game shows quiz contestants about topics they don't even care about. But for 100 episodes, the Go Fact Yourself podcast has asked celebrity guests trivia about topics they choose for themselves. And introduced them to some of their personal heroes along the way. Oh my gosh. Shut up. Oh, I feel like I'm going to cry.
Starting point is 01:04:50 Oh my gosh. It's always so exciting to meet you. Join me, Jake Heath Van Straten. And me, Helen Hong, along with special guests DJ Jazzy Jeff and Faith Saley, plus some amazing surprise experts on the 100th episode of Go Fact Yourself. And join us twice a month, every month for new episodes of Go Fact Yourself here on Maximum Fun. Hi, Maximum Fun. It's me, James Arthur M. from Minority Corner. Okay, I got some good news and I got some bad news. Bad news, Minor news minority corner after seven years and 340 episodes
Starting point is 01:05:26 we are wrapping up our show i know i know but hey good news good news is that means we must have solved racism and homophobia and sexism and equality and equity for all yay no no we didn't well i'd like to think at least that we are better off than when we started seven years ago. So don't worry. We might be saying goodbye, but our episodes will live on in the podcast airwaves forever. Or until the internet crashes and burn. Whatever comes first. Minority Corner.
Starting point is 01:06:00 The final episodes right here on Maximum Fun or wherever you get your podcasts. Minority Corner. Because together, we're the majority overheard overheard the segment where if you out there have never heard this segment before pretty self-explanatory but i'll explain it all the same you hear something out there in the world you come here on the podcast call you can write or you can be a guest and we always like to start with the guest karen would you please don't let people think you can be a guest and we always like to start with the guest karen would you please don't let people think they could be a guest don't well one to once a year we have a sweepstakes and if we call you at the right time oh we do we are after christmas show lately
Starting point is 01:06:37 it's been all a guest yeah but if you know the phrase that pays then uh that's true when a seat on the podcast um if anybody wants to guess what the phrase that pays is uh that's true when a seat on the podcast um if anybody wants to guess what the phrase that pays is uh i encourage you to send in a message you sure no well don't we're gonna get a thousand messages that say amateurs and whoop here uh karen do you have an overheard i do i've been uh gathering them if you have more than one we're totally we're really okay oh well then um one okay i have to admit this is one i i wrote in one once but i never heard it right if you hate it don't you think that was a clue that maybe i know they're like oh no it's not good i'll i'll spring it on though
Starting point is 01:07:21 i'll get it on no matter what Actually well it's one of our current Overheard a kid at the vaccination clinic We're asking them like oh is this Is this your first dose or your second dose And she goes my last one It's the last god damn thing I do I bet that place is a good
Starting point is 01:07:42 Overheard Location Although with all those masks I bet that place is a good overheard location. Yeah. Although with all those masks, it's hard to hear people. How many people just say, oh, I hate needles. Like, who loves needles? Like, you're not special. You know, the cast of Trainspotting.
Starting point is 01:07:58 Sure, yeah. Goths. Goths, sure. The cast of Requiem for a Dream. These are all big needle folks. Hell racer. Do you, do you have more?
Starting point is 01:08:13 Do you want us to go around the horn and you do another one? Or do you want to do another one right now? How many do you have? Oh, let's see. Wow. This is a list. Yeah. She just unscrolled a parchment.
Starting point is 01:08:24 Another overheard. So, yeah, I heard a girl saying to her friends, like, well, me and him got along just fine until he tried to mansplain the whole goth scene to me. Yeah, exactly. You want to find that out for yourself. Also, what's the explanation? What's the mansplanation? Yeah, that's what the man had to do to me. It's not something you would really the mansplanation yeah that's what the maddie it's not something you would really understand as a woman it's something
Starting point is 01:08:49 it's really a man-driven yeah industry yeah do you think there's only one company that supplies all the like towns goth shops like there's you know there's enough towns i think to make a decent business out of you know spooky corsets or something like that. Fingerless gloves. You opened for spooky corsets, didn't you? In vaudeville? Yeah. Their act was crazy filled with penises.
Starting point is 01:09:19 Yeah, no, I think your goth store would have multiple brands. Yeah? You wouldn't have one supplier. We have all the top goth brands. Like a house want, your goth store would have multiple brands. Yeah. You wouldn't have one supplier. We have all the top goth brands. Like a house brand. You got your Kirkland. Yeah, we sure have. We've got no name.
Starting point is 01:09:31 We've got loads of goth. Gobs of goth. Do you have another overheard? Okay, I'll do one more. Oh, yeah. Yes. Yes. um do you have another overheard okay i'll do one more oh yeah yes yes uh sorry does it's like going home on a uh subway like super late at night there's like a really tired guy with his
Starting point is 01:09:51 friends he's like i know i smell like ass by the end of it i just don't want to smell like double ass like that it's like you just know like it's like there's a given like there's a certain amount of ass that we all have to i'm. Yeah. By the end of what? Oh, I think it was, I assume, like, a long work day or something. Like, the end of a shift. Oh, sure. Be like, oh, yeah, well, obviously, you know, you can't avoid smelling like ass at the end of it. Yeah, at the bean factory.
Starting point is 01:10:13 You know, if you can avoid smelling like double ass, then, yeah. Yeah, I got to go from the bean factory to the, I don't know, whatever makes up other farts. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For the toot festival. We got enough beans out there. I got another broccoli factory, bean factory, and then... A broccoli factory? They're making synthetic broccoli.
Starting point is 01:10:37 Dave, do you have an overt? Yeah, mine is... Okay, so this is not... Barely counts because it's a child of mine who was in my car and it's something she said something that has become quite the motif on the show lately. But we were it snowed last week for one day and it was not very much a tiny amount of snow. Yeah. not very much, a tiny amount of snow. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:06 But we left, I was driving the kids to school and we left early because I was like, I have a feeling there's going to be bad traffic. Right. Because of the snow. And we were driving down a major street and there were, you know, two lanes of traffic going our direction, two lanes coming the other direction.
Starting point is 01:11:22 And a guy was just trying to sneak across in his car he was like slowly edging out into traffic but too slowly and waiting for an opportunity to cross and he ended up just blocking me and the guy next to me and so we're stopped and i'm just like bad mouthing him like look at this idiot oh come on buddy what are you doing and then he realizes he's not gonna get across so he backs up and then the guy next to me goes like he makes room for the guy next to me but i'm still stuck yeah and then he goes forward again and i i uh you know i'm my kids are with me i'm trying not to swear or like fly off the handle you know how i'm a yeah yeah rageaholic yeah short fuse on this guy uh so i say to the kids oh this guy this guy's
Starting point is 01:12:13 not a very good driver and uh poppy says oh is he like mr bean yes one of the worst drivers around if you ask i don't know that's debatable he's well he's always hitting a three-wheel car and that's not hitting it he's driving it off the road that yeah which is not good but he's very skilled he he'll like he will follow a an ambulance super close oh yeah so he can he'll he you know he had a heck of a time getting into that parking lot. And there's an episode where he's on the roof. That's what I was thinking. Like when he's on his big living room chair, his lounge chair, on the roof of his Mini, driving with like a broom and some ropes. I mean, he's a good driver.
Starting point is 01:13:00 He's a good driver in that scenario. Absolutely. I take it back. I'm sorry, Mr. Bean. You're a good driver in that scenario absolutely i take it back i'm sorry mr bean you're a great driver please don't come over to my house and accidentally kill me with this fucking axe you know by accident does he ever accidentally kill anyone i guess the blue the three-wheeled car is probably dead just leaves a trail of carnage in his way yeah or you think it's the same guy every time or is it
Starting point is 01:13:27 different people in different blue oh that's a good question i'm assuming the same guy he probably has a nemesis yeah right yeah yeah yeah he's taking it out on his his mortal enemy i buy that i buy that yeah what did he ever do to mr bean he? He wouldn't let him cheat off of his test. You think it's the same guy? Yeah, same guy. Do you have an overheard? I do. Mine is also involving a child.
Starting point is 01:13:57 My brother and sister-in-law's child, Mason, has learned how to dance. That's the new thing they put on how old is mason he is two and a bit uh two and a half we'll say and he uh he loves it he put on the music he does the kind of like classic baby dance it takes me like wiggly butt yeah yeah yeah jumping up some you know mostly torso mostly torso work and uh there they got a video from him he was dancing to Everybody Dance Now at CNC Music Factory and they were trying to get him to do different dance
Starting point is 01:14:32 moves they were like raise the roof and he kind of did it with one hand and do the sprinkler and then somebody in the room said hey can you do the running man and he was like yeah and he just ran out of the room laughter laughter really good something Breach would do He was like, yeah, and he just ran out of the room.
Starting point is 01:14:47 Really good. Something Screech would do. We call him Tiny Screech. That's his nickname around the house. Small Screech. Yeah. Now we also have overheards sent in to us from all over the map. If you want to send one to us, you can send it in to spy at maximumfun.org. And let's say the first one is from Izzy in Toronto.
Starting point is 01:15:16 You know Izzy? Oh, yes. You do? It's like I'm the only Karen. Yeah. One Izzy, one Karen. Oh, yeah. Overseen at the basement of Tallboy's Craft Beer House in Toronto.
Starting point is 01:15:30 That's really close to me, actually. Yeah. Maybe I do know Izzy. So you do know Izzy is what you're trying to say. Wait, is it true for Isabel? Yeah, I know Izzy. During a fun stand-up show, this is the basement. I'm assuming this is the washroom, it says,
Starting point is 01:15:46 you know, a nice pencil, full house shaped how I am as an adult. Oh, sure, yeah. Yeah, that's nice. Maybe it was a message to the late Bob Saget. Just like putting it out there. Or the current
Starting point is 01:16:03 Dave Coulier, who's still with us. Maybe it was Alanis. Shit. That's true. That did happen. And, you know. That did shape how she, that did shape her as an adult. How is Dave Coulier not on Canada's Got Talent?
Starting point is 01:16:17 He's not Canadian. Hmm. Interesting. Touche. We've been over this. But, you know, couldn't they get Joe Flaherty or something like that? Like, why such an obvious pick with the Howie Mandel? That's all I'm saying.
Starting point is 01:16:33 I think he probably has a stake in it. Oh, yeah. He probably is the producer of it. Mandel Industries. Richest man in Canada, Howie Mandel. This next one comes from Alex. This is the setting. Walking the dog on the street, passing by two guys, biker guys,
Starting point is 01:16:54 talking to each other outside the building door. 35, 40-year-old, 50-year-old, other guy. Guy one, hey, man, what's wrong? Everything okay? Guy two, oh, man, I don't know. Having a weird day. Don't know what to do with this situation what happened i just found out that my dad is fucking my ex-girlfriend man the guy would say well that'll make your day interesting you were saying before how everything's so boring that's gonna really jazz things up
Starting point is 01:17:21 why can't your dad just date your ex-girlfriend why do you have to get into the specifics uh-huh yeah i heard that my dad's seeing my ex-girlfriend or that my dad has a crush on my ex-girlfriend that's cute actually that is cute i hope he's not trying to go to bed with her my dad sent a note asking my ex-girlfriend if she likes him back. Go to bed with. This last one is from Casey
Starting point is 01:17:58 in Arkansas. We were talking about our plans for an upcoming trip while eating supper with my six-year-old. He ended up dropping some food on his shirt, and like he always does, proceeded to just remove the shirt instead of wiping the spill. He quickly looked at my husband and said, now guys, I know I won't be taking off my clothes in any restaurants at Disney. Let's chill out, everyone.
Starting point is 01:18:23 Yeah, yeah. This is a one-time deal um i don't know what the i know that they serve turkey legs yeah i don't know if you're disney yeah disneyland can you door dash a turkey leg from disney from disney it ends up costing you 120 dollars that's on site i think it it got sent to 21. Yeah. Have you ever been to Disneyland slash world? Karen? I went to Disney world, the one in Florida.
Starting point is 01:18:50 Yeah. It was a seven, which is probably a great age to go. So yeah. Yeah. Cause it's like old enough that you remember it and. Yeah. Not old enough to be traumatized by it. Yeah. And then, yeah.
Starting point is 01:19:01 And then my brother was five. So it was like, I don't know if maybe he doesn't remember it as much, but it was a, yeah, it was fun. Yeah. Yeah so i was like i don't know maybe he doesn't remember it as much but it was uh yeah it was fun yeah yeah specific uh yeah there's a big ball there yeah there's a big ball yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah world after all sounds like she definitely went yeah that's right i can prove it yeah you went on it's a small world that's nobody would know about that unless you went yeah no that's insider stuff big ball and additional overheards that are written and we also accept your phone calls if you Nobody would know about that unless you went. Yeah, that's insider stuff. Big ball. In addition to overheards that are written in,
Starting point is 01:19:29 we also accept your phone calls. If you want to call us, our phone number is 1-844-779-7631. That's one. Ugh. SpyPod 1, like these people have. Hi, Dave and Graham. This is Russ from Oklahoma. I was just calling with Overheard.
Starting point is 01:19:48 In my job, I'm part of a unit that does pain management where we inject people's backs and legs that are hurting. And so I see a lot of ass crack in a day. And one day, the patient was sitting with the doctor, and he, as he always does, said, Do you have any questions for me before we get started? And she waited about three seconds, and then she said, Yes. When you were in medical school, did you know you would have to look at butts all day long?
Starting point is 01:20:18 That's all I got. Great show, guys. Off I go. I guess if you're a proctologist, you knew. Yeah. Pain management? I don't know. Pain in the butt? Yeah, guys. Off I go. I guess if you're a proctologist, you knew. Yeah. Pain management? I don't know. Pain in the butt?
Starting point is 01:20:28 Yeah, sure. Yeah, so I guess he's injecting, like, steroids or morphine. Hot beef. That's my favorite chip flavor. Y'all got any hot beef back there i mean i feel like i don't get them injected directly into my ass but somehow they end up there anyway all right ladies yeah you don't own chips you just rent them that's what i said not a disgusting phrase i've never heard of before oh it's it's about beer don't buy it, you just rent it.
Starting point is 01:21:05 What does that mean? You pee it out pretty fast. Oh, but you definitely get drunk. Yeah, that's true. You get a beer belly and stuff. Isn't it true of all food that it comes out of you? But I mean, beer has probably no nutritional value, so it just goes in and goes out.
Starting point is 01:21:26 But like gum is an investment. That's with you for years. Yeah, exactly. That you own. You swallow gum, you got that for life. Anytime I'm on a job interview, they ask me what my five-year plan is. I'm like, well, I'm going to be digesting most of this piece of gum. They're like, shit, y'all can get out of here. All right, here's your
Starting point is 01:21:46 next phone call. Hey, Dave and Graham, this is Gabe from Los Angeles. I was just walking down Hollywood Boulevard when I overheard a man say um fuck
Starting point is 01:22:02 Oh, it's ah motherfucker what did he say ah oh no fuck that's like the panic oh no that's the genre when the moment where the caller realizes that it's definitely going to be played as well oh no dave's gonna play this one
Starting point is 01:22:37 oh that was great yeah that was good for whatiles is. Technically, that doesn't count as an overheard, but... Did he call back? Nope. Oh, no. I was like, when these calls have, like, multi-parts, they call back and you're trying to redeem themselves. I know, I always check, but no, this guy presumably perished. Yes.
Starting point is 01:22:58 He was hit by a comet. He wasn't paying attention. He was leaving that over. And here's your final phone call hi Dave and Graham and fabulous guest this is Julie from Woodbridge Virginia
Starting point is 01:23:12 I overheard my very outgoing 7 year old daughter say this to my husband she said daddy I don't like being the center of attention and he was like why do you say that? And she answers, imagine this. I'm rich and I go onto a stage and everyone cheers.
Starting point is 01:23:33 That makes me embarrassed. All right, off I go. So Jimmy Patterson has to go through every week at his... Jimmy Fallon has to go through. Yeah, yeah, exactly the two jimmies slim jims the three jimmies um yeah i guess that's i don't know that's like a kid's understanding of what's famous i guess yeah you're the rich person goes on stage and everyone claps for them sounds i mean they could buy people looking at butts all day. Yeah. This is what jobs are.
Starting point is 01:24:05 Yeah. Why would you pick the butt one if you could pick being rich and getting clapped at? Well, that brings us to the end of this here podcast. Oh, man. Karen, thank you so much for being our guest. Oh, man. Thanks for having me. Of course.
Starting point is 01:24:24 It was exciting. Yeah. I mentioned it was, yeah, once every nine years, I guess. Yeah. We'll see you again. Yeah. We'll see you again in 2033. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:24:34 Hopefully, you'll be an extra in a futuristic cop movie. Indeed. No, wait. 29. 2031. Yeah. 2031. Yeah. Yeah. You don't have to wait those extra couple years um where can people find your your goings on uh you can find my website is karenokeef.net and then from there you can see twitter and instagram and stuff like that or everything that's that's the hub yeah yeah that's kKeefe dot net I have an actual website that is still working as far as I know and nice
Starting point is 01:25:09 uh yeah and I have a comedy album out called surprised eyebrows check that out probably somewhere yeah Spotify and yeah nice nice well thank you so much for being our guest it was a treat to have you oh man it was so fun uh and you our guest. It was a treat to have you. Oh, man, it was so fun. And you listeners out there, it's very nice to have you. And thank you very much for listening to the show. And if you're out there and you're considering a career, think about rich people getting applause. Not so much. Looking at butts.
Starting point is 00:00:00 Join us next time on Stop Podcasting Yourself.

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