Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 791 - Abby Shumka

Episode Date: May 16, 2023

Her own person Abby Shumka returns to talk languages, listener mail, and macaroni....

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hi, he's Dave Shumka and he's Graham Clark and together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 791 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name is Graham Clark and with me as always in the flesh, right, I can reach over and touch him right there. Mr. Dave Shumka. Hi, I didn't know you would though. Yeah, I said I would and then I did. You didn't say you would. We never had this conversation.
Starting point is 00:00:44 Hi Graham, yes we're in studio for a rare in studio episode. We never had this conversation. Hi, Graham. Yes, we're in studio for a rare in-studio episode. Yeah, I've got my guitar. We're going to do some of our big hits from the 60s. Yeah, what are our biggest hits from the 60s? Turn, turn, turn. Something's happening here. Sure.
Starting point is 00:01:00 We're just like a cover band? Yeah, we're a cover band of the 60s folk movement. Do you know who wrote turn turn turn uh the bird the birds performed it oh who wrote it god because it's from the bible it's from the bible it's from ecclesiastes as made popular by well the birds through pete seeger. Did they win a Grammy and then they all got on stage and then there was just a beam of light that was also there? Well, geez, a lot of guys go up and win a Grammy and thank God. It's true. But this time they were like, actually, he had a big part of that.
Starting point is 00:01:37 He came on the stage, gave him a big hug. Robes. What do you think God looks like? I think he's an old white man with a long beard, lives in a cloud. I think he looks like an H.P. Lovecraft kind of thing. Oh, sure. Like a giant and tentacly. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:55 Yeah. Claws for hands, et cetera. Uh-huh. I think my God is scary. Oh, really? In my religion. Do you ever think, oh, what if God was just one of us i think he'd be an alpha if he was one of you think if god was not just a slob like on the no no he'd be an alpha
Starting point is 00:02:15 and he'd know how to push people around that song she was like what if god was one of us just a slob like one of us hey hey hey lady yeah just because you keep pizza boxes on your floor doesn't mean the rest of us do joan joan he was joan osborne john osborne john osborne john osborne the swedish what if yod was what it was our guest today also such a treat to see in person somebody who hasn't been on the podcast for a while and we've missed her and it's great to have her back. She is a mother extraordinaire. She is a seamstress, a fantastique. She is a husband of Dave, but also her own person.
Starting point is 00:02:59 It's Abby Shumka. Yes, she's primarily my husband. Husband of Dave. Your husband's, right? Didn't you guys decide to flip it? Yeah. It's 21st century,. Yes, she's primarily my husband. Husband of Dave. Your husband's, right? Didn't you guys decide to flip it? Yeah. It's 21st century, baby. Let's do it.
Starting point is 00:03:10 Again, this is not something I was supposed to discuss. I didn't know I would be touched. I did not know I would be... Husband. Husband. Wifed. You would be husbanded. When Abby started dating me, all her friends were like,
Starting point is 00:03:23 you got to wife that guy. Yeah. You got to wife him. He's an alpha. Yeah, that's true. I'm more of an alpha alpha. I'm trying to think of like who are the top alphas in pop culture. I'm trying to think of like who's the.
Starting point is 00:03:41 Okay, I'm not sure I know exactly what an alpha is. Just like the biggest, strongest, smartest, in charge of everything kind of guy or gal. Well, there's... What do you mean by alpha then? Do you mean alpha as a person who believes in that philosophy or a person like me who doesn't and has a different idea of what an alpha is? What is your idea of what an alpha is like i don't watch vanderpump rules but i think why i know but i i catch up tom sandoval is an alpha okay he thinks he's the hottest shit he thinks he's so smart he thinks he's great
Starting point is 00:04:17 but he's not he's a fucking piece of shit loser hey hey hey to the people in his life. You're thinking the other Tom. Oh, Tom Colicchio? It was also kind of a piece of shit, as far as I can tell. From Top Chef. Never Tom Colicchio. I was going to ask you, I was just going to suggest Jason Momoa.
Starting point is 00:04:39 I was thinking The Rock. Definitely. But he's an actual decent human person. He's got the other half of the rock. Definitely. Or the rock. The rock. Yeah. But he's an actual decent human person. Well, see, he's got the other half of the alpha. He's all these things, but also he doesn't need to prove it. That's what it is. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:54 He's comfortable in his own giant skin. Yeah. He doesn't need to show off his muscles. He doesn't tell everyone. He never shows off that he's working out. No. He just shows off. He wears entire shirts.
Starting point is 00:05:04 He wears entire shirts. He wears entire shirts. All the time. Whole shirts. Every just parts of them. He's never like telling everyone he eats cod. Yeah. What if cod was one of us? Okay.
Starting point is 00:05:13 All right. Let's get to know us then. Get to know us. Now, Abby, is it? Last time I checked. You are, you were our first guest of the pandemic era. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:31 A trailblazer. Yeah. Such a trailblazer. I was never seen again. They never had me back. Yeah. Well, you're back now. Dave's always like, I don't want to record over Zoom.
Starting point is 00:05:48 And I'm like, I'm right here. No, no, no, no, no, no. Well, I mean, I'm happy to record here. It's this guy. It's this guy. But two of us could be here and he could be somewhere else too. That's true. And you only have one external feed to worry about.
Starting point is 00:06:04 I know. It's right. It's right. It's right. And you only have one external feed to worry about. I know. It's right. It's right. It's right. You guys. You got fair criticism but you're back.
Starting point is 00:06:10 But it's a sunny day. It's 2023. It's nice. It's a year. God is good. God is one of us. God is great. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:18 What, how has your pandemic been? Speaking as a guy who's been beside you the whole time. Has been trapped in a house with me. It's been real, it's been, there's been some ups and downs, rightBain. Speaking as a guy who's been beside you the whole time. Has been trapped in a house with me. It's been real, there's been some ups and downs, right?
Starting point is 00:06:29 Yeah, it's been emotional. It's been a rollercoaster. What's your favorite emotion? For me, it's joy. Oh, yeah? Joy's nice. Apathy, maybe. That's your favorite?
Starting point is 00:06:39 Yeah, I like that. I like a sleepy, medium kind of. Yeah, me too. Joy's too. There's too much of a fall off. Yeah, I like that. I like a sleepy, medium kind of... Yeah, man. Choice to choice. There's too much of a fall off. I know if I'm making a choice, I'm still making a choice. But I'm making the choice to not make a choice. If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice.
Starting point is 00:06:55 Yes, I still have made a choice. That's Rush. Yes. Oh, shit. Yeah. Words of the late Neil Peart. I don't know any Rush. I know nobody's hero.
Starting point is 00:07:04 I know that was in rush you know those parts i know those parts yeah what's nobody's hero i don't know it was a song of theirs in the 90s that was like on much music oh sure but he's nobody's hero. Do you remember Roll the Bones from the 90s? No. Why does it happen? Because it happens. Roll the Bones. I remember all these songs.
Starting point is 00:07:31 You guys were Rush heads? Well, yeah, my dad was. He liked prog rock. We listened to Yes. We listened to Rush. We listened to all that stuff. And then also the radio station that we always had on in the house was the classic rock rate. So R.E.m ryan adams
Starting point is 00:07:46 oh yeah the contemporary stuff of like the 80s was also on that as well as the guess who and let's you know your favorites from the 60s 70s 80s and today and they kind of played but it was 1988 but yeah so there was a lot of rush going on. Yeah. I remember we had that little, I'm sure other people had it, that little brown cassette suitcase. Oh, yes. It was like the fake leather and you open it up and it had all the little slots. I had friends who had one. Yeah, we had, there was quite a few rush and yes tapes in there.
Starting point is 00:08:16 And was that, did you keep it in the car or the house? A car. Okay. But also could be taken into the boardroom or in the bedroom. In the bedroom. Yeah, the bedroom. You open up your tape. And then the sound of as you choose the tape.
Starting point is 00:08:34 Yeah. You just flip through them. Rush, eh? Yeah. Nobody's here. I'm going to put on moving pictures by Rush. It's got a silly cover where someone's moving a picture. And it's 11 minutes long.
Starting point is 00:08:48 The cover? The cover of the tape? Yeah, Rush is like a cultural blind spot to me. Sure. In the CanCon division, I mean, there was all sorts of CanCon that was just foisted upon us.
Starting point is 00:09:02 Oh, yeah. You did not choose to ever listen to that. And CanCon is also the, it's short for Oh yeah, you did not choose to ever listen to CanCon or whatever. And CanCon is also short for Canadian content but in Quebec it's how they pronounce
Starting point is 00:09:09 King Kong. Oh no, CanCon! What's the word for a building? I forget. I'm putting me on the spot now.
Starting point is 00:09:22 It's not immeuble. No, it's immeuble. No, that's furniture oh no you guys supposed to speak a little french yeah we speak a little french little french goes a long way how do you let's hear just a little oh you know what our kids are gonna so margo is in grade three and in grade four she's gonna start learning french and french is how we we talk to each other in French. Because they can spell now, so we can't spell like... Margot's got to go to the D-E-N-T-I-S-T. But then we say... She's going to the Dentines.
Starting point is 00:09:51 Then she'll say the Dentiste. And she has no idea what we're talking about. No, we would say... Margot, c'est le Dentiste. Le personne qui... Drill. Le médecin pour les dents. That's really good but yes
Starting point is 00:10:07 talk to just say a little back and forth you guys in french um Dave you start okay
Starting point is 00:10:13 tu pis tu as eu le diaphe thank you it's a little little song we came up with a few years ago
Starting point is 00:10:21 what does it mean what does it mean do you stink you had diarrhea yeah oh what was the other there was another one we came up with a few years ago. What does it mean? It means you stink, you had diarrhea. Yeah. Oh, what was the other? There was another one that was like,
Starting point is 00:10:30 C'est le David qui pue, qui pète, qui prend son cul pour une trompette. What was that? I believe that means there's David who stinks, he farts,
Starting point is 00:10:40 he thinks his... He uses his butthole like a trumpet. Oh, yes. Couldn't Q also be penis? No, Q. Oh, pardon me. Which is a different word.
Starting point is 00:10:53 It means tail. It's the same word as tail. So yeah, that's confusing to me. It's all confusing to me. And they're spelled totally different. And there's eight letters you don't even pronounce. So what is butt then? As you're playing trumpet with your butt. What's butt? Q. Q in this one. But it's C letters you don't even pronounce. So what is butt then? As you're playing trumpet with your butt.
Starting point is 00:11:06 What's butt? Coup. Coup. In this one. But it's C-U-L in French. Coup. Like a cul-de-sac. Yes, exactly.
Starting point is 00:11:13 I get it. Okay. I got it. Well, I would learn it as fess. Me fess. That's like your bum. That's like the cheeks. It's like your bum cheeks.
Starting point is 00:11:20 Coup de sac. Sack of farts. Thank you. Yes. There you go. Very good. Yes. Thank you. Thank you. Yes. There you go. Very good. Yes. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:11:26 Thank you. Do you speak anything? No, I don't. I speak English sparingly. Do you, boy, do you wish you could learn your native Gaelic? Yes. And then never have anybody to play with it and talk to it. And because it's not, there's not a ton of people who speak Gaelic.
Starting point is 00:11:43 I have. I have worried about worried I have wondered about learning Welsh oh yeah that's fucked up yeah Welsh is really weird
Starting point is 00:11:51 because it like sounds like 40% like English yeah and then there's a bunch of other weird yeah
Starting point is 00:12:00 I don't think I've ever heard somebody talking Welsh before very strange I was I don't actually have any Welsh heritage you might I don't know about you guys heard somebody talk in Welsh before. Very strange. I don't actually have any Welsh heritage. You might.
Starting point is 00:12:06 I don't know about you guys. Do you have any Welsh in you? Want some? You want some? You want a little Tom Jones up in there? My friends were at a wedding, and it was a few months ago, before the Oscars. And there were some Irish people at the wedding, and they were like, yeah, we're really excited because there's Irish representation in the Oscars this year. And they were like, oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:30 Oh, the Banshees. Yeah, yeah. And my friends were like, the Banshees. And there's like a few other actors. And they were like, no, the Irish language in the movie The Quiet Girl. That no one's heard of. That was nominated for Best Foreign Language, Phil. Nice. Well, good for them. Yeah, good for them. They made nominated for best foreign language film. Nice.
Starting point is 00:12:45 Well, good for them. Yeah, good for them. They made a whole movie with the Irish. But they lost it. What do you think about Irish reunification? Where does everybody stand on that? Oh, boy. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:12:55 I don't know enough about it. No, neither do I. I think it would probably be pretty simple to figure out. Yeah, pretty straightforward. Do you and do you? Orange is flattering on no one.
Starting point is 00:13:09 Can we just agree with that? Yeah. Speaking of over there, did you guys watch The Coronation? I didn't.
Starting point is 00:13:17 I saw a lot of the photos and fun memes that people came up with. I was very confused. I was like, how many of you people woke up early to watch this? Or are you like. Meme,
Starting point is 00:13:29 meme content. They gotta have, they gotta be on, on it right away. Cause all the good memes are going to be taken. Or did they, yeah. Were they,
Starting point is 00:13:35 were just watching highlights? I just know there was one of a, a picture of, uh, King Charles with the two staffs. Oh yeah. With a captioned, uh,
Starting point is 00:13:44 when your dad tells you to bring a screwdriver but you don't know which one very good yeah did you watch any of it no no just the random yeah just the random internet yeah stuff i didn't there was a concert was there really singer nick cave apparently he loves the monarchy for some reason. And he looked amazing. It's weird. That's weird. Isn't that weird?
Starting point is 00:14:09 He was like stoked to be there. Huh. Isn't that weird? I don't think anyone was like. Was anyone there not stoked to be there? Or was anyone like, darn it, I gotta. Well, probably a lot of the kids. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:19 Yeah. Dragged along. George probably was like. That's my impression of Prince George. Yeah. Yeah. That sounds about right. Yeah about right Well one day you'll be the king I don't want to be king I want to dance I just want to dance
Starting point is 00:14:34 Do we want to put bets On how long he's king for Before he dies That seems ghoulish They are ghouls Oh They're ghouls. Oh, yes. Well, a ghoul for a ghoul. Ghoul for a day, goblin for a lifetime.
Starting point is 00:14:51 I did see that they were... I don't even know what that means. I saw that you could buy vapes that looked like... King's vape? It looked like Prince Charles' fingers. Oh, bad girl's fingers? Hey, well, it's not body shame. I'm sorry, you're right.
Starting point is 00:15:04 I shouldn't. It's weird. It's weird, it's bad girl's fingers? Hey, well, it's not body shame. I'm sorry. You're right. I shouldn't. It's weird. It's weird. Crang-like appendages. Soft and pink. Yeah. So what? People have soft pink bodies.
Starting point is 00:15:13 He's representative of a soft pink portion of the population. Yeah. Yeah. It's true. It's true. But, you know, some people might want to smoke out of those fingies. Oh, those piggies. I guess those are toes.
Starting point is 00:15:30 No, I didn't watch. Was there a concert? There was a concert. And I didn't hear who was on the concert. Prince Charles. I saw Katy Perry. Oh, did he? He did do some of his songs from the 60s.
Starting point is 00:15:40 Yes. He got up there and sung Turn, Turn, Turn. Yeah. It's good to be king, he sang. I just saw that Katy Perry had a second outfit. Oh, really? So that's how I know
Starting point is 00:15:50 she performed. I saw, yeah, just the giant disc. Because she had the pink outfit in the church and I saw her because she couldn't find her seat.
Starting point is 00:15:55 She was walking around and she couldn't find her seat and then I saw a picture of her in this big gown. So they couldn't get British people to perform? No. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:02 But not even Nick Cave? Nick Cave. That's not why he's there. But the bad seeds wouldn't. Maybe. Or do you really, like, is that the music
Starting point is 00:16:09 you want going on? Nick Cave music? Instead of Katy Perry singing fireworks? Yeah. You want Nick Cave? Charles Urafa. Talking about his dead,
Starting point is 00:16:18 his dead girlfriend or whatever. Just kept pointing at him He's the firework. This guy, aw. Talking about his dead girlfriend? Who's? Nick Caves
Starting point is 00:16:26 Yes Does he have a song I don't know anything about He's got a weird But I Is he British Or he's Australian I thought he's Australian
Starting point is 00:16:34 They're part of the Commonwealth Or American No What do I know No no no Not American Australia's not putting
Starting point is 00:16:41 Him on their money Is what I heard Nick Cave Yeah But they gotta put it On our money And I'm like What the hell Why They were gonna Not American? Australia is not putting him on their money is what I heard. Nick Cave? Yeah. But they're going to put it on our money? Mistake. And I'm like, what the hell? Why?
Starting point is 00:16:48 They're going to regret that later. Yeah. This is a musical blind spot for me. Nick Cave? Mm-hmm. But you know all the Bad Seed stuff. I love the Bad Seed. You know the Red Right Hand?
Starting point is 00:16:58 It was in Scream. It was in Peaky Blinders. You haven't seen Scream or Peaky Blinders. It's a theme song for Peaky Blinders. Ah, he's from... Red, red, I am. What city do we think he's from in Australia? Brizzy.
Starting point is 00:17:13 Melbourne. Waracknaville. Ah, yes. Also close. I have Waracknaville. My favorite, yeah, movie about spiders from Macafield. Graham, what's your favorite scary movie? Wait, who's this? who's this on the line
Starting point is 00:17:27 who's asking I've been through this before did you see the newest scream I haven't no I saw the number
Starting point is 00:17:35 five which was just called scream no no oh there's a six one now because they made the M
Starting point is 00:17:41 oh they made the M a VI so scream in New York is the sixth one Scream 5 Escape from New York
Starting point is 00:17:48 no Scream 6 oh shit fuck but eventually every horror franchise has to go to New York or Muppet franchise
Starting point is 00:17:55 are they going to go to space they're going to go to space next yep Jason X was in space it was so good I loved that movie saw it in the theater
Starting point is 00:18:01 uh uh Houston what is your favorite scary movie? Oh, no. Is that Scream in Space? Yeah, it's Scream in Space. In Space, nobody can hear you scream.
Starting point is 00:18:14 This is so good. We're doing the marketing for them. Yeah. Also, there's an alien. Yeah. We've got the guy in the ghost face and the alien. We'll just see who wants it more we do a little
Starting point is 00:18:28 soft shoe routine and yeah Courtney Cox in every single one of them good for her Neve Campbell not in the new one gotcha
Starting point is 00:18:34 yeah she's done she doesn't want to do it anymore she only did the did she do the first five she did three oh five so she did like sort of a party of five
Starting point is 00:18:42 I guess in a way yeah in a way whatever what were the the castmates was like Lacey Chabert So she did like sort of a party of five, I guess, in a way. Yeah, in a way. Whatever. What were the castmates? Lacey Chabert. So who is Lacey? She was the young one. She was the young one.
Starting point is 00:18:53 She went on to be in Mean Girls. And she has a bunch of Hallmark movies now. She has tons of Hallmark movies. We have Jennifer Love Hewitt, who... Ghost Whisperer. She was whispering for a while, but I don't know what she's been doing lately. She was in that movie with... Hallmark movies? Yeah. No, she's on 9-1-1. Oh, yeah. She was whispering for a while, but I don't know what she's been doing lately. She was in that movie with Hallmark Boys. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:05 No, she's on 9-1-1. Oh, yeah. She also did a movie where she or a TV show where she was a masseuse or
Starting point is 00:19:13 something. Oh, yeah. Oh, there was the client list or something, wasn't it? Yeah. About
Starting point is 00:19:17 Was she in a movie called Heartbreakers? Yes, that movie was actually really good. I heard that was quite good.
Starting point is 00:19:24 Sigourney Weaver. It was really good. I heard that was quite good. Or Sigourney Weaver. It was really good. No one can hear her scream. And Gene Hackman. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It is. It's actually really funny.
Starting point is 00:19:32 And then who else was that? Scott Wolfe. Right. Were Scott Wolfe and Matthew Fox both in it? They had Wolf and a Fox. Wolf and a Fox.
Starting point is 00:19:40 They weren't allowed in the same room. One would just chase the other. There had to be a handler on set at all times. And it says at the bottom
Starting point is 00:19:48 no animals were harmed during the filming of this. I don't know what Scott Wolf's doing. He's doing something recently. I've seen him do something. And Matthew Fox
Starting point is 00:19:57 had some rough times. We did? We did Lost and then there was like domestic abuse stuff. Substance abuse stuff. We don't need to know everything about
Starting point is 00:20:05 these people we're just listing every single one fun things we're talking fun things i thought that um the fox guy thought he was the robin from batman what was that guy's name chris o'donnell chris o'donnell yeah they short-haired 90s actors yeah yes yeah yeah yeah uh never watched party of five Never regretted it. Every single one of them seemed absolutely insufferable. I remember there was this gentleman in the first episode who walked behind Neve Campbell. Sure, he was super cute. He was a super cute boy, and he was me.
Starting point is 00:20:39 It was David as another kid. I was in the pilot as an extra. Well, now I've got to watch the show. You've seen it. I've posted it before. I've seen the picture of you in, what was the one that somebody sent? It was a frame of a movie shot at your school, and you're in it. For one second, somebody sent a-
Starting point is 00:20:59 It must be the Party of Five. Party of Five? Yeah. Okay. Walking down the steps? Or like Nev standing on the steps and Dave and another redheaded kid are walking by I think she's talking to the guy, a cool looking dude who was in Empire Records. Oh, cool.
Starting point is 00:21:15 The guy who would then go on to be on CSI? No. That guy was, was that guy also in? Was he the look at the Bloodstains guy from that movie? Yes, Dazed and Confused. When they're climbing the water tower? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:33 Look at the Bloodstains. Listener, I'm sorry, we're just going to list some movies that some actors we can't name were in. That we haven't seen in years. The guy talking to Neve Campbell, who I think was in Empire Records, was also in Limitless. Oh. we're in uh that we haven't seen in years nev campbell who i think was in empire records was also also in limitless oh fantastic what did he get unlimited he got killed because he got too close he got too limited yeah that's right so you should have been too unlimited no no no no no no
Starting point is 00:21:59 no brain bill for you they should have called that movie Too Unlimited. They tried. They couldn't get the copyright. Yeah. Vin Diesel, not Lingo. Too Unlimited, very litigious. Have you seen the clip of Bjork? And she's maybe drunk at like some cabaret night. From years ago. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:16 And she whispers to the piano player who's playing like an old timey like player piano. Kind of like honky tonk sounding. Just standards or whatever, yeah. And she whispers to him and then she says into the microphone in French, this is my favorite song. And he starts pounding out. Bonk, bonk, bonk,
Starting point is 00:22:35 bonk, bonk, bonk. And she just starts singing the one word in that song. Yeah. Well, I guess you gotta pick three words. Well,
Starting point is 00:22:44 there's no, and no limit. Yeah. And there's a verse. there's no, no limits. No, no, no, no. Oh, well, I guess you gotta pick one song. Yeah, well, there's no, and no limit. Yeah, there's a verse. Oh, there's no, no limits.
Starting point is 00:22:48 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
Starting point is 00:22:50 no, no, no, no, but they just keep saying no limits again. Did they also do get ready for this?
Starting point is 00:22:58 Shabano? Yeah, y'all ready for this? Maybe. Guys, I don't know. I think too, I get too unlimited in
Starting point is 00:23:05 Technotronic and Yakid K Young MC no who's the one that's like well the Vengaboys
Starting point is 00:23:13 for one thing yeah for one thing yeah who's the one first of all Vengaboys for one thing do you know how hard
Starting point is 00:23:20 it is to know about the Vengaboys and Rush they don't have it all existing in the same brain. It's hard, man. Just constantly holding it in. Holding the two ideas in my brain at the same time. And I just want to sing.
Starting point is 00:23:35 They should have me at the coronation. Yeah. Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun- This is my favorite song. C'est mon chanson préféré. King Chuck. This is for you. Yeah. Boom, boom, boom, boom. I want you on my throne.
Starting point is 00:23:59 Well, we love you, King Charles. Spaniel. If he's going to be on our money, he should have to have the crown on it. Because otherwise he just looks like a man. Some dull. Yeah, some guy in a suit. Queen didn't have a crown on. Didn't she?
Starting point is 00:24:13 She had a little tiwawa. Yeah, she had like a little. Maybe she did have a little tiwawa. Yeah, and she was classic. She was one that we recognize her on money. But now Charles just looks like a guy. Some fucking guy. Could be any guy.
Starting point is 00:24:25 With his one hand weirdly in the front jacket of his. We're not hand shaming him, I thought. No, it's a weird position. It's his pose that he does. Because he can't get his weird freaking Krang hand into the pocket. We're not hand shaming anyone. His hands or Krang. There's no wrong way to have a body Graham
Starting point is 00:24:45 what did he do to you I actually some people think Crank's really attractive yeah that's true but there was
Starting point is 00:24:53 something to do with the ring did he have to put a ring on there's so many things he's got to hold a thing
Starting point is 00:24:58 and two sticks and the ball and the hat a stone or something well he did the single ladies dance so that was about putting a ring on it.
Starting point is 00:25:07 Oh, was Sasha Fierce there? It was Sasha Fierce. Yeah. Beyonce was not in it. Was Sasha Fierce like a... Chris Gaines? It wasn't. Was it?
Starting point is 00:25:19 Or was it just like the name of that album? It was a bit of both. I think she had a particular Sasha-ness. But don't a lot of artists like adopt like a persona? Sure, for an album. Slim Shady. Sure. Wait a minute.
Starting point is 00:25:34 He's not a persona. That's a real man. Bickle, Bickle, Bickle. He's still copping that Slim Shady stuff and he's 45. No, I don't know how old he is. He's probably 50. Is he 50 maybe? Let's guess. He, I don't know how old he is. He's probably 50. Is he 50 maybe? Let's guess.
Starting point is 00:25:46 He's older than us. Eminem turns 50. Is Eminem Jubilee our Eminem Jubilee? I'm guessing he turns 50 in two years. I'm guessing
Starting point is 00:26:00 he was born in 75. 50 in two years. Wow. I'm just a guess. Wow. What a life. Oh, let me two years. Wow. I'm just a guess. Wow. Wow, what a life. Oh, let me think about that. Does anyone else have a guess?
Starting point is 00:26:09 I'm going to guess that he is 59. 50? No, sorry, 49. I think he's 52. He is. I think he's cracked 50. He's always so young. Mind you.
Starting point is 00:26:22 He's cracked 50. Really? Yeah, born October 17th, 1972. Oh, that's good. He's always so young. Mind you. He's cracked 50. Really? Yeah. Born October 17th, 1972. Oh, that's good. That's good for him. 52? How old is that? 51.
Starting point is 00:26:31 51. Almost 51. He'll be 51 in October. Oh, there we go. They're all pretty close. Come on. 50 Cent's coming to town. I know that.
Starting point is 00:26:39 Yeah. He's going to come to town, do some of his patented rapping. Upside down? Yeah. Like the Super Bowl? Yeah. And then he pukes at the end of the concert. It's just a countdown to how long it is before 50 seconds.
Starting point is 00:26:51 Nice. You might get five songs. You might get 15. Who knows? At the beginning of the show, you see him shoveling some chili in his face, and then they crank him upside down. They put him in the gyroscope. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:27:03 Have you ever been in one of those no never you think maybe once as a kid yeah you're like a thrill seeker yeah yeah i was always a very very lily livered queasy little little man um what kind of thrill seeking stuff do you do skydive no but uh she likes the roller coasters i don't like scary rides i like soon as like, I used to go to a amusement park and see the most fucked up looking ride. I'm like, I'm doing that one. You're going to do that one. Yeah. Um, and I did things like canyoning and whitewater rafting and like mountain stuff.
Starting point is 00:27:38 She actually rode the Venga bus. I did. Too scary for this guy. We couldn't sneak up on anybody. They always knew we were coming. Um, yes. I did. Too scary for this guy. We couldn't sneak up on anybody. They always knew we were coming. Um, yes. The,
Starting point is 00:27:51 uh, but I think those days are long gone. Cause now just the idea of it. I went like cave spelunking. see that. Yeah. But now, now I just get such a pit in my torso.
Starting point is 00:28:00 Now just that the idea of it. Yeah. No going in a cave. Uh, it was fine when I did it. Like I didn't even think about it, but now if I think for even more than 0.7 seconds about it, my mind implodes.
Starting point is 00:28:13 Is it just because you're young and young and stupid? Yeah. You didn't care. Yeah. I was never young and stupid enough to, uh, to go in a cave. Oh,
Starting point is 00:28:21 sure you were. Thanks Dave. You were plenty stupid. Thank you. Aw, crawl into a cave. Oh, sure you were. Thanks, Dave. You were plenty stupid. Thank you. Crawl into a cave. Too scary, man. Too scary. It's messed up. I could not do it now. No.
Starting point is 00:28:34 What are your five favorite caves? Nick. Nick. Nicholas Cave. Is that two different guys. But it's based on Nick Cage? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:52 Surely there's a Flintstones character of some sort. Sure. Yeah. Rick Cave. Rick Cave. Oh, my favorite guy from Mortal Kombat, Johnny Cave. Johnny Cave. Yep.
Starting point is 00:29:02 And rounding him up, Cave D. Lang. There we go. Oh, Canada sweetheart, Cave D. Lang. There we go. Oh, Canada, Canada sweetheart. Cave D. Lang. Oh, my favorite song of hers is Constant Caving. Yes. Yes. Which is sadly about cave-in disasters.
Starting point is 00:29:18 Oh, yeah. Yeah. Have you guys ever, have either of you guys seen The Descent? Yes. Isn't that the scariest freaking movie? Yes, it is a terrifying movie. It's about a, yeah, it's a bunch of women on one of their like bachelorette. Yeah, it's like a fun weekend or something, isn't it? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:35 Oh, I've seen that, Girls Trip? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They go in a cave. It's like The Hangover, but for girls. They go in a cave that's like the people think that it's like a well trod, well mapped out cave that everybody does. But she's found a cave that is off the beaten track.
Starting point is 00:29:54 They get caught. They get lost in there. Is it scary because of the cave or there are scary people show up? There's a little bit of both. Is it your favorite scary movie? There's a little bit of both. It's probably in terms of like scariness it's pretty freaking high is it on top of just thinking the whole time oh they're
Starting point is 00:30:10 fucking 300 feet under solid rock yeah like just that looming over top of you the whole time you're watching the jump scares and the tension like in all the regular stuff just that just looming is it does it have that horror movie thing of no one famous is in it? I think so. Yeah, no one's famous. It's maybe 10 years old, 15 years old maybe? Yeah. Yeah. Not recent.
Starting point is 00:30:29 So freaking scary. It was fucking scary. Yeah. What is the other one that I watched that I thought was so freaking scary? Arachnophobia? No freaking way. No freaking way. Saint something.
Starting point is 00:30:43 And it was so scary. It's about a woman who thinks she's a saint She's directly talking to God Like Joan of Arc What if God was one of us Yeah The other Joan Joan of Arcadia
Starting point is 00:31:00 Abby What's going on with you Not what's going on with you huh uh not too much i'm growing my hair out so i recently looks good you've got a couple different colors yeah the kids dyed their hair and we had some leftover stuff so i just slapped them on and uh the your kids have gone the crazy hair gone tropo yeah they've gone they've gone tropo now what is tropo well you've been in the tropics
Starting point is 00:31:28 it's like it's when you've been in the tropics too long like when a white man moves to Thailand and just goes fucking crazy in the woods
Starting point is 00:31:34 yeah and just like let's go off the grid I cannot wait you just heard about this and now you cannot wait I cannot wait it sounds great
Starting point is 00:31:42 you have to go move to the tropics I don't know how much you're going to like that. Well, you know, you know, Laotian jungle.
Starting point is 00:31:49 Well, I don't want to live in the jungle. see, that's going tropo, man. No, no, I can't go.
Starting point is 00:31:54 I can't go. I can't go tropo with the, uh, four seasons with the air conditioning. Ah, that's the one I want. It's like Marlon Brando in apocalypse now. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:01 Oh, he's tropo. He's gone tropo. Is this, by the way, is this a problematic term? As far as I know, it's not because it's
Starting point is 00:32:08 derogatory for white people and we are white people. I don't know. Yeah. I think it's an Australian thing. We're reclaiming this
Starting point is 00:32:13 word. It definitely sounds Australian. Because my dad was traveling and working in Southeast Asia for a long time and he met a bunch of people who
Starting point is 00:32:20 like, like my dad, he would come in and out of these, these places. He worked in the cement industry for a long time. So he would go to the jungle somewhere. Yeah. And he would come in and out of these, these places. He worked in the cement industry for a long time. So he would go to the jungle somewhere and he would be there. And pave over the whole thing. And just dig it all up and then pave it over.
Starting point is 00:32:32 And he would come in and out or they'd live for a year or whatever. But then there was other men who had been there for like 30 years and they, you know, they just let the jungle life embrace them, except it was their weird white man version. Like they didn't integrate into the local community. Jungle life. Yeah. I'm far away from. Anyway.
Starting point is 00:32:52 It's a Baltimore Tarzan boy. Oh, I do know that. Yeah. Okay. Anyway, some of that. Yeah. I was watching. I watched a documentary.
Starting point is 00:33:03 This very tropo was Werner Herzog. Oh, with the boat. Yes. Yes. Whatever it's called. Yeah. I was watching, I watched a documentary that was very troppo was Werner Herzog. Oh, with the boat? Yes. Yes. Whatever it's called. Yeah. Burnham Dreams.
Starting point is 00:33:11 He's got to get the fucking, is it? Yeah, he's trying to. Fitzcarraldo? No. Fitzcarraldo, yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:15 that's the one, yeah, yeah, He's trying to move an entire ship over a mountain. But Burnham Dreams is about Fitzcarraldo.
Starting point is 00:33:20 It's about the making of Fitzcarraldo. Right. Yeah, yeah, Because he's making a movie about moving a boat, but while he's making the movie, he actually has to move. Yeah. Yeah. Because he's making a movie about moving a boat, but while he's making the movie,
Starting point is 00:33:26 he actually has to move the boat. Yeah. And then they made a movie about that. And so it's, there's some bunch of layers here. Yeah. It was great. And it's Werner Herzog.
Starting point is 00:33:34 You remember Werner Herzog's like a real snack. He's really good looking. Who's the lead of Fitz Corraldo? It's another German guy. Klaus Kinski. Klaus Kinski, of course. The crazy Klaus Kinski. Natasha Kinski Of course The crazy Klaus Kinski
Starting point is 00:33:45 Natasha Kinski's dad Yes I have to watch that University Speaking of Caves and Werner Herzog Yes
Starting point is 00:33:53 Do you remember When we went to that 3D Cave of Forgotten Dreams Movie It was up here On Cambie Street Wasn't it
Starting point is 00:33:58 It was great And it was during A film festival Oh I remember now And at the end One of the producers Was like It was directed by Werner Herzog, but one of the producers of the movie was presenting it for the festival.
Starting point is 00:34:10 And it was like, Werner said we could call him after the show. So he called him and put him on speakerphone. Microphone. And I feel like, was Werner Herzog like, oh, yes, I'm just at Home Depot right now. I was reading about this because there's a scene where he does this whole monologue. And apparently he did that off camera. And the director was like, do you mind just redoing that entire monologue on camera? And he was like, sure.
Starting point is 00:34:43 There's that Fitzcarraldo documentary There's the Apocalypse Now one There's the Johnny Depp one Where he It's like Terry Gilliam Oh yeah the Fantorium
Starting point is 00:34:59 Yelling at the windmills Oh yes He's tilting, you idiot. Oh, he's tilting. Oh, sorry. I don't know what that means. But it's, I think when a sub-documentarian shows up on your set, that's when you know the movie's not going well. There was also a dramatization of that, wasn't there?
Starting point is 00:35:23 Of the documentary? Because wasn't Adam Driver in like a Don Quixote? We're making Don Quixote. I don't know. I forget. Oh my God, I'm dying here. Yeah, there was one really good one about the movie Dusk Till Dawn. And it was.
Starting point is 00:35:37 Oh, that'd be good. Yeah, it was really good. One of the things was they were shooting out in the desert. They had to make this big set. And then within 24 hours, the set got fire. It burned to the ground. That was the. George Clooney.
Starting point is 00:35:54 Yeah. Ben Tarantino. Ben Tarantino starring in it? Yes. Jennifer or Juliette Lewis. Yeah. The dad. And.
Starting point is 00:36:02 She was the daughter. And it was about vampires? Yeah. But you don't think it's about vampires are you okay i've got a real lump in my throat but i'm okay now they're in a bordillo but yeah when you see the cello the huge part of the set is burnt and they're like yeah that's because it actually did burn did you say a bordillo yeah an armadillo. Like a bordello for armadillos? Yeah. You never know what you're going to find in the desert. After dark.
Starting point is 00:36:29 Not bad. You might be naked and Salma Hayek pouring tequila all over herself. Or it might be a bunch of armadillos fucking. I do need to rent that again. Rolling around together. Yeah, they're rolling around. That's how they have sex. They just create one big ball and just roll around.
Starting point is 00:36:44 Oh, they're going at it soccer soccer game best to stay out of their way what else Abby growing out your hair growing out your hair
Starting point is 00:36:54 yeah we got two dogs now oh yeah two dogs that's right that's been a lot monster and company yeah we also
Starting point is 00:37:00 this was going to be one of my things but I'll lend it over here we've celebrated two dog birthdays in the last month. Nice. Because we happen to just get dogs at the same time. Yeah. Two years in a row.
Starting point is 00:37:12 Yeah. What did they do for their birthdays? Well, I feel like when we had Grandpa, our old dog, he would get a hat. First of all, he was just the best in general. He was an angel. Recognize our darling angel. First of all, he was just the best in general. He was an angel.
Starting point is 00:37:24 Recognize our darling angel. And we would make him like sort of cookies in the shape of his age. Okay. Abby would make a special hat every year. Every year. A little something. Different every year. I tried. A whole different theme and look.
Starting point is 00:37:38 Yeah, different shape, different materials. Yeah, one year it was like a leprechaun hat. One year it was a princess hat with the- Ribbons, sure. He had a boater one year. leprechaun hat. One year it was a, you know, a princess hat with the. Ribbons, sure. He had a boater one year. Yes. Witch hat. And these dogs, because there's two in a month, and they do not want to wear a hat.
Starting point is 00:37:55 And they're fucking freaks. Oh my God. What will they wear? Nothing. Nothing ever? Also, Monster, yeah, Monster is two two now and he's about 20 pounds irma is twice his size and is half his age half his age and like if we ever try to put a sweater on because monster actually likes wearing like in the wintertime he likes a little raincoat he likes a
Starting point is 00:38:19 little t-shirt a little fleece we have like i'll put it in front of him and he'll like put his paw on it and stand and wait for me to put it on as soon as we put it on him she irma is it irma's like oh he's now a stuffed toy that i can destroy why are you wearing a shirt what's this how come he gets a shirt i want a shirt stop wearing the shirt i want to take off the shirt so like we put it on him and then a minute later it's on the ground she's fully like hockey sweatered him like over his head. Yeah. She's written a letter to Mr. Eaton for a new hockey sweater. There's a big hockey fight.
Starting point is 00:38:53 Was it last night or the night before the Florida Panthers and the Vegas or no, was it? Who was it? It was the Vegas Knights and somebody's punching a guy in the ribs. He got him down. He just kept punching him in the ribs. Oh, on the ice?
Starting point is 00:39:04 These are players doing it? Yeah, Vander Kane was punching one of the... I'm on Reddit so I only see the... My Reddit only shows the fights in the stands.
Starting point is 00:39:13 Oh, in the stands. I don't care about any sports coverage. Just watch me... Let me watch my public freakouts. Usually it's a lot of face punching
Starting point is 00:39:18 but I've never seen where somebody on the ground just giving it to the kid. This was a thing, yeah. They did ask him about it afterwards and he was... I forget what he said. But he was like, yeah. It felt ask him about it afterwards and he was, I forget what he said,
Starting point is 00:39:25 but he was like, yeah. He just felt softer than a face. Yeah. He's not, I could feel where his pads ended and I could feel where he was. Yeah, he could just punch all night. It was great.
Starting point is 00:39:34 I know there's a space between his chest thingy and his ant thingy. I love hockey. Why don't they protect that area? I don't know. Ask C-3PO. Yeah, that's true.
Starting point is 00:39:46 I guess he's been fine. I guess he's also repairable. I'd keep my arm back on. That's not C-3PO. C-3PO can't. He'd have to have somebody. He needs Chewbacca to carry him in a backpack for a while. He would be so whiny about it the whole time.
Starting point is 00:40:00 Chewbacca. It's the minions. Chewbacca. It's the minions. Chewbacca. So yes, we're two dogs deep. We're two dogs deep, two kids deep. We have no rugs in our house or fancy furniture.
Starting point is 00:40:19 Yeah. Everything is covered in a sheet or a quilt or something. Yeah, like just you can dream about future. Yeah, vacuum, you know. Yeah. Twice a day. Twice a day? Between the shit, like the dog's dirty feet. I sew a lot and my sewing station is in the middle of the house.
Starting point is 00:40:37 So there's also that. And then the kids. Ugh. With their crumbs. Dave's all gardening and stuff. Yeah, I garden I go out in the garden he's tracking dirt
Starting point is 00:40:47 and I come in and I shake myself up yeah and then I have to wait for Mr. Clean to show up he just goes and then he shows me how do you summon him again
Starting point is 00:40:56 my shitty husband comes in and makes a big fucking mess how about that this is you're referring to a commercial not real life right
Starting point is 00:41:03 no David we talked about this you're an angel and I love you life right no David we talked about this you're an angel and I love you we talked about this literally though we didn't talk about this like two days ago
Starting point is 00:41:13 but Dave's like I forget why it came up and I'm like Dave no no no no you are not like other men no no no do not compare yourself to them
Starting point is 00:41:18 you are you exist you vibrate on a whole other level yeah I was comparing myself to a bunch of men I had I put up some posters and I was comparing myself to a bunch of men. I had, I put up some posters and I was like, how about these guys? Hey, what about these guys?
Starting point is 00:41:28 And then me compared. Don't do that. And I said, don't you dare, David. Don't compare yourself to them. Come on, those two. Don't even. What kind of, what type of man is Dave like in this, in this scenario? Is he a.
Starting point is 00:41:40 What scenario? Beta cuck. Yeah, that's right. Beta cuck dweeb. Absolute zero. Absolute loser. No, I mean. Sure thing.
Starting point is 00:41:58 Yeah, Dave's. he's a real i'm not like the other boys i just you know some boys want to be king i just want to dance yeah yeah yeah i understand that um dave what's going on with you? Well, big thing is... Big news. Dogs had birthdays. Happy birthday. As we were saying, the new dogs, they don't... There's two in a month, and they're not going to tolerate hats anyway. And if we make a big bunch of cookies in the shape of their birthday number, they'll just destroy them.
Starting point is 00:42:42 We can't hold them back. Yeah, it's too hard to keep the other one away for that long. Right. So, you know. They're not, yeah, we need to, maybe on their fourth or fifth birthday, we could maybe have a little bit more control over the situation because now it's just. What about Photoshop, you guys? Photoshop
Starting point is 00:42:58 could get it done. Get AI to do it. I actually got rid of Photoshop because it was costing me $30 a month. Yeah, yeah. And there's new costing me $30 a month. Yeah. Yeah. And there's new tools now that are much easier. Yeah. And I was doing my taxes. I had to do my, well, I didn't have to, but I chose to do my own taxes this year. How'd that go?
Starting point is 00:43:15 It was very easy. Yeah. My dad was doing them before for years. And, but I did the sync everything up with your account online Canada account. Yeah. And listeners, my, uh,
Starting point is 00:43:29 social insurance number is blue, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
Starting point is 00:43:33 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
Starting point is 00:43:33 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
Starting point is 00:43:33 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
Starting point is 00:43:35 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
Starting point is 00:43:35 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
Starting point is 00:43:36 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
Starting point is 00:43:36 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
Starting point is 00:43:38 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
Starting point is 00:43:38 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
Starting point is 00:43:38 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
Starting point is 00:43:39 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
Starting point is 00:43:43 blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, six books. But, I mean, I think it was pretty easy. We'll find out, won't we? But like,
Starting point is 00:43:47 my dad used to always do my taxes and then I would get a letter a month later saying, yeah, we assessed what your dad tried to do and it was very sneaky
Starting point is 00:43:55 and we're not going to allow it. So, let's see if this is any better. I can't get into my Revenue Canada account and everybody's on strike. So,
Starting point is 00:44:04 there's nobody you can call and ask for assistance. Yeah, true enough. Not in the strike end? Not for the CRA people. They're on their own thingy. Oh, CRA. Yeah, the CRA. No, Canada Revenue Agency for our non-Canadians.
Starting point is 00:44:16 R-I-R-S. Yeah, R-I-R-S. R-I-R-S. You sound like Irma. R-I-R-S. R-I-R-S. It's my birthday. R-I-R-S. You sound like Irma. It's my birthday.
Starting point is 00:44:35 The other day, Graham, your special friend was walking past our house and dropped off some things that had come in the mail. Yeah. And so I have these things here and I would, well, a couple of, I don't know anything about, I won't get ahead of myself. Okay. don't know anything about i won't get ahead of myself okay um so uh we did get this letter from andrea c in london who writes dear dave and graham beautiful penmanship penmanship let's see as a penmanship yeah lover and without uh it's not even looks like a teacher yeah yeah i'm loving your being there done that podcast as a canadian living in the uk it occurred to me you might get confused in a future episode i don't know how long ago this came oh mother do okay where mr bean tries to make twiglets uh yes we did see that episode where it was the new year's eve episode right
Starting point is 00:45:16 where he gets up and yes he only serves three twiglets and then runs out and then so he has to cut off twigs from the tree outside as i've never seen this snack in canada here are some to enjoy so andrea c very kindly sent a uh thing of twiglets oven baked they're kind of like in a kind of a giant pringles-esque yeah and they're yeasty little turds but it's maybe like four inches across it's a bit bigger uh they yeah they're like little, tiny... Boy, I guess the closest thing I could think of would be like a twiglet?
Starting point is 00:45:49 Like a twig? Like a tiny twig? Tiny twig. Oh my god. I knew that... Does Grammy even want to eat these? Yeah. I'm scared. But I'm just like, is there meat product on it or something? No, no, no. I haven't gotten to... I'm sorry. I haven't offered them.
Starting point is 00:46:06 Ingredients, whole wheat flour. I thought they were like all yeast. Oh, sure. Vegetable oils. Yeah. Flavoring, yeast extract, barley, salt. So the flavoring is yeast. Okay.
Starting point is 00:46:18 They're like a Vegemite. Oh, yes. Okay. I had one and I won't have a second. The kids did not like them. They were. I didn't even have one. They're horrible.
Starting point is 00:46:29 But thank you. Yeah. That's. Yeah. That's very funny. That's funny because we did find out the Twiglets was a thing, but that was because we had to like, what were those snacks? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:40 Let's try to replicate. And I, so I, I, but thank you very much for sending them. I wish there was a smaller container. I wish they came in like those little. Like a little lunch pack size. Yeah. A little snack size. You can empty this out and then put your tax receipts in it.
Starting point is 00:46:55 Yeah. That's what I'm going to do from here on out. My filing system, it's going to be a. Yeah. This is it, 2023. Just a big like cardboard container for every year. Yeah. Just keep buying twiglets,
Starting point is 00:47:08 throwing out the twiglets. Someone also, I don't, you, someone, I just got the container. I didn't get a name. I didn't have a name.
Starting point is 00:47:17 Oh, someone sent us from nuts.com. We must've talked about this six months ago. Yeah. Those old, um, strawberry candies that are the wrapper looks like a strawberry and. Those old, um, strawberry candies that are, the wrapper looks like a strawberry and one end is,
Starting point is 00:47:29 um, one end is, uh, green. Twisted. Yeah. One end's twisted, one end's green. The twisted end is green. Um, and then, so they sent us these, they're not the same though. I had one.
Starting point is 00:47:39 No. I had one too. And they're not chewy. They're not chewy in the middle and they're, and they're twist on both sides. Gotcha. Yeah. But it's very close. If I, you know, if I're not chewy. They're not chewy in the middle, and they're twist on both sides. But it's very close. If I didn't know any better, I would assume those are the right ones. And it's the same kind of fake strawberry,
Starting point is 00:47:52 like a drawing of strawberry pattern on the wrapper, which I do like. I like the design. So thank you, anonymous listener. Yeah. I think that nobody... Because otherwise I would have if there was a letter with it. But I'm going to take one for later this will be my
Starting point is 00:48:06 afternoon snack and the other thing that was brung over boy did we lol was an envelope
Starting point is 00:48:17 addressed to Dave and Abby and it doesn't have an address or postage so obviously this was given to Graham by hand
Starting point is 00:48:22 and then lost in a box somewhere and it's a very baby themed baby toys and stuff on the front it's very cute April 2014 this is dated
Starting point is 00:48:33 so excited to hear your baby news all the best to you Trish Clark Graham's mom that's right and then your dad. Big, big news. Pretty good, John. Ah, nice.
Starting point is 00:48:48 Big baby news? Big, big? Big baby. Oh, who cares? You tell us. Big news. Big, big news. Oh, there you go. You're the expert on your dad's.
Starting point is 00:48:55 Is that how your dad talks? Does he say big baby a lot or big, big? He's always saying big, big news whenever I get on the phone with him. Big news. Big news. I'm doing your taxes. Does your dad do your taxes? He has done in the past, yes.
Starting point is 00:49:11 And I would do them, but I can't get into my CRA account. Why don't you just call them? I did. Boy, first of all, I'll tell you where your tax money is not going, to the hold music for the CRA. It is the weirdest, weirdest music that they put you on hold to. It's not even just like...
Starting point is 00:49:30 I would love that. I would love that. No, it's just... It's awful. But anyways, I'm locked out of my account. I don't know how to get in. I know my password is correct.
Starting point is 00:49:43 What is it? What's your password? Beep-bop-bloop. Bloop't know how to get in. I know my password is correct. What is it? Huh? What's your password? Beep-bop-bloop. Bloop-bloop-bloop. It's Dave's SIM number. The, uh... Boy, I had such a fun thing to say, and I lost it.
Starting point is 00:49:58 Oh, shit. I find that's happening more and more, is like my brain is bad. Yeah. Bad brains. Yeah. Yeah, Bad brains. Yeah. Yeah. I'm a.
Starting point is 00:50:07 No worky good anymore. I started where I will watch. I watch a movie every day pretty much. And there are movies that I'll vaguely recognize the title of. And then I've seen it, but I don't remember it at all. Oh, for sure. Yeah. Like I don't remember even a second of it.
Starting point is 00:50:23 I can rewatch it and be like. Brand new movie? Yeah. 75% brand new movie? Yeah. Yeah. Like, I don't remember even a second of it. I could re-watch it and be like, maybe big. Brand new movie? Yeah. 75% brand new movie? Yeah. Yeah, I've done that before. That's fairly new within the last few years. I was, I opened, I'm a big opener of the fridge and forgetting what I wanted. Yes. That's my
Starting point is 00:50:39 tragic downfall. Wasn't there a fridge that had a camera in it and then you could look at what's inside on your phone or something? Yeah. And there's also one where you camera in it and then you could look at what's inside on your phone or something? Yeah. And there's also one where you tap on it and it shows you. Yeah, the door turns see-through. Yeah, but it doesn't. It's a camera inside. It's a picture or something, yeah.
Starting point is 00:50:55 Because if the door was see-through, you'd just see the condiments. But if you have to knock on the door, why don't you just open the door? Exactly. Yeah. And you can look on your phone to say oh do i need sour cream and you see sour cream but is it new sour cream yeah or is it like you still need to go to the fridge and see if you need to buy a new sour cream i want to be able to just say sour cream and the fridge go yes sir or no sir depending on three bags full Anyway so that's what's going on with me
Starting point is 00:51:28 Dogs have birthdays and we got some mail Also the guy who sent us Those beans We're working on it Apparently we got the beans but the Place doesn't know we got the beans Yeah I gotta go back and like really hash it out with What's his name
Starting point is 00:51:43 Mr. Bean Mr. Bean? Yeah, Mr. Bean. Yeah. Mr. Bean's ran beans and Mr. Twigs duck twigs. So what's going on with you, Graham? I went to home of the Winnipeg Jets. I thought you were going to say Home Depot. I went to Home Depot.
Starting point is 00:52:00 You were? Yeah, I'll never guess who was there. Giving a speech. No, I went to Winnipeg. And in Winnipeg, there's a restaurant called Kevin's. Yes. Oh, I've been to Kevin's. It's so good. Is it like a diner?
Starting point is 00:52:18 Well, originally. It sounds like a diner. No, it's not. And that's the weird thing is it's like, it started out as an all macaroni restaurant. Oh, yeah. I remember Dave telling me about this. Years ago, he went. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:31 And now it's... He didn't maybe? No. I went alone. Oh, okay. Yeah. And that used to be the whole thing. They had like 10 kinds of macaroni.
Starting point is 00:52:37 Yeah, I had the lobster macaroni and I was underwhelmed. I shouldn't have gotten the lobster macaroni. Yeah. Well, yeah, because your expectations would be so high And you're in Winnebago I want it served in like a lobster tail Is it? No No that's what you want
Starting point is 00:52:52 So shall I scoop it out for you Or would you like to do it Suck the macaroni out of your legs I also like it when they offer to scoop the food into my mouth It's a lobster stuffed with Macaroni Do you want us to feed you today, sir? Yes, yes.
Starting point is 00:53:08 Tell me I'm a good boy. But yeah, so now the menu has changed. They still have macaroni. A selection, sure. But they have other stuff there too. But like you say, Kevin sounds like a diner kind of place. Kevin isn't really a name I like a diner kind of place kevin kevin isn't really a name i associate with diner food no i would think of like it's the Two X's and a Y. That's a place for ribs, Jackson's.
Starting point is 00:53:49 Anyways, the name. You would assume maybe that it was named after the guy who started it, Kevin. That would be the logical thing. That is not correct. He started it after his parents left him home alone. That's what I thought. That's what I thought. I thought this is a clever thing they've done
Starting point is 00:54:05 where it's Kevin's and it's macaroni and cheese. If you were home alone, you would eat macaroni and cheese. Yeah, that's what I thought it was. And I pitched that to the server. I was like, is this why it was there? And the server was so tickled. Oh, really? Yeah, the server was like, I've never
Starting point is 00:54:22 thought about that ever. That's great. Do you think, is Kevin McAllister the world's most famous Kevin? He's probably the most famous Kevin. Oh, I mean Kevin O'Leary. Yeah, Kevin James. Kevin Sorbo. Kevin Sorbo. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:35 Kevin Kline. Yeah. All the big Kevins. But yeah, I thought it was macaroni based on Home Alone. Anyways, the guy thought it was hilarious. It's actually named after a cat. Oh, I was thinking like the owner's son or dad or something. That's what I was thinking.
Starting point is 00:54:50 If it wasn't him, maybe it's his granddad and he owned a diner. Yeah. No, it was his cat who owned a diner. And it's gone. Named after him. It's gone high end. Oh. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:00 Good for them. Yeah. Is the macaroni still, is it now high end macaroni? Like, I don't know, lobster macaroni? Yeah it now high end macaroni like I don't know lobster macaroni yeah it's lobster macaroni because it's gold leafed caviar
Starting point is 00:55:09 but then so I ate there then I went what's high end about it now just the menu's like more gourmet and then I have
Starting point is 00:55:17 and it's just like a nice like white tablecloth you know nice oh sit down place yeah sit down place it was pretty nice when I went
Starting point is 00:55:23 yeah I guess so. It wasn't slot buckets, that's for sure. Oh yeah, before you get to your next topic, I meant to ask you about this card your parents sent me. Yeah. For our child who was born nine years ago. Yeah, almost. That's her birthright, by the way, when
Starting point is 00:55:39 she turns 18. She gets that card. So they gave it to you. I guess. And you. Or left it here. Yeah, maybe.
Starting point is 00:55:48 And you were charged with giving it to me. Yeah. It didn't happen that way. Make it. No, that's true. Uh, did you,
Starting point is 00:55:57 do they know now? They know now. They know now. Did they just think we were in ungrateful assholes who never thanked them for their card and they've hated us ever since? I don't think they thought twice about it. No, it's fine. Well, it was big, big news. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:09 It was big, big news. When you told that to your dad, he's like, oh, that's big, big news. That's pretty good. That's big stuff. Okay. Pretty good. Maybe write that in a letter somewhere. Or a card.
Starting point is 00:56:17 I feel like writing that down. Where should I do it? Yeah, I'll send them a fax. Sounds like BBN. Big, big news. Oh, God. I was like, is that a star wars thing i don't know so then i went to a bar and here's the thing that i learned very quickly it's very hard to
Starting point is 00:56:31 to drink after you're so full yeah but i did it i made a run at it and i had a couple of uh whiskey with ice and that was when they brought over the bill I was like oh no I had two whiskeys she was like yeah yeah and I was like this is
Starting point is 00:56:49 for two so cheap so cheap and I was like trying I couldn't process it in my head your brain just didn't
Starting point is 00:56:56 know what to do with that information are you going to make us guess how cheap it was for two it was let me guess
Starting point is 00:57:02 very cheap this is doubles. Two doubles. Two doubles. Ooh, 22 bucks. $9. $12. Whoa, that's nuts.
Starting point is 00:57:12 What kind of whiskey was it? Like, Jesus. Okay. What kind of ice was it? Oh, crystal. Diamond. Diamond ice. Whoa, that's the best.
Starting point is 00:57:22 But yeah, so I was like, I guess we'll have another. Throw away that receipt. Start again. So if you're ever going to make cheap booze, real... I mean, that's cheaper than it is for me to drink at home, which I do constantly. I'm usually
Starting point is 00:57:39 having two double whiskeys with... With lunch? With my lunch of ice. That's how I keep so trim. Yeah, if you want to have a good time in Winnipeg, that's where you head. Alcohol's ready for you. Who's waiting for you?
Starting point is 00:57:56 I haven't really been to bars much in the last few years. Post-COVID. And parenting and then COVID. We've just not been not going out after 4 p.m but i remember that you should kind of like strategically price things because it's also in the days of cash there's oh sure they price things to make the cash make sense and like yeah like oh this drink is four dollars okay i guess you're getting a dollar tip
Starting point is 00:58:22 right yeah yeah but uh it's all out the window. I assume it's, it's well, because now it's just a percentage. Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah. That's,
Starting point is 00:58:32 uh, like a week, no, two weeks ago, I was part of a, an art show in this like independent gallery. And I knew you, you spray painted yourself gold and pretended you were a statue.
Starting point is 00:58:44 No, I, I, I tied myself up and said, you can do yourself gold and pretended you were a statue? No, I tied myself up and said, you can do whatever you guys want to me. People would chew on gum and then just stick it to your body?
Starting point is 00:58:51 Yeah. But I knew because it was a gallery they might need cash as opposed to they might not have a tap. So I got cash out of the bank and I forgot how slippery money is in Canada.
Starting point is 00:59:04 Especially this new stuff, right? Yeah. So when I pulled it out of the bank and I forgot how slippery money is. Especially this new stuff, right? Yeah. So when I pulled it out of my pocket, it was just like. Make it rain. Yeah. I forgot all about cash. An ATM lobby. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:16 It was. It's cartoonish. It's freaky. Yeah. I don't know. I like that. I had to pick up some of those Girl Scout cookies. I got some cash.
Starting point is 00:59:24 Oh, yeah. We'll help you. To pick up some of those girl scout cookies. I got some. Oh, yeah. We'll help you. Yeah. You'll see it on your floor. Oh, guys, should we move on to some overheard? Okay. Trans representation in media is at an all time high with trans entertainers gracing the screens large and small. But trans voices, especially black trans voices,
Starting point is 00:59:46 are rarely centered in our own stories. That's why we bring you a new limited series called We See Each Other, the podcast, co-hosted by me, journalist, and better half of the MaxFun Podcast's fan tie, Traevel Anderson, and me, award-winning journalist and media personality, Sharjah Sell.
Starting point is 01:00:02 All of it is based on my book, We See Each Other, a black Trans Journey Through TV and Film. Now listen, folks, we're having a very different kind of conversation. It's giving kitchen table talk. We get into the discourse, honey. Tune into We See Each Other, the podcast at MaximumFun.org
Starting point is 01:00:17 or wherever you get Sleighworthy audio. The Legend of Zelda, Tears of the Kingdom, Diablo 4, Final Fantasy 16, Street Fighter 6, Baldur's Gate 3, Starfield, Spider-Man 2, Master Detective Archives Rain Code for Nintendo Switch? No? Is that just me? It's a huge time for video games. You need somebody to tell you what's good, what's not so good, and what's amazing.
Starting point is 01:00:44 I'm Jason Sch schreier i'm maddie myers and i'm kirk hamilton we're the hosts of triple click a video game podcast for anyone who likes games find us at maximumfun.org or wherever you get your podcasts bye Overheard. Overheard. Saying things in small wings. If you hear things out there in the world, we don't want you to just keep them to yourself. That's rude. Share.
Starting point is 01:01:17 Share and share alike. And we always like to start with our guest. Abby, do you have an overheard? I do. I have a couple. Okay. A couple. Do you want to go? Go around the horn and come couple. Okay. A couple? Do you want to go
Starting point is 01:01:25 Go around the horn and come back? Two at a time? No, I'll just do my two because one's really fast. Picking the kids up from school, there's, you know, chaos chaos in the school yard, right? Because it's 303. Running everywhere, screaming.
Starting point is 01:01:42 Finding their grown-ups and things. Or running from their grown-ups equally there's a lot of boogeyman a lot of vans circling the block um
Starting point is 01:01:52 a lot of clowns in the drain um and I just hear kids say to another kid yeah
Starting point is 01:02:00 whatever Caillou ouch ultimate burn ultimate burn and I felt like that like is it from Friday where it's like Chris Rock and Ice-T going yeah whatever Caillou Ouch Ultimate burn Ultimate burn and I felt like that like is it from Friday
Starting point is 01:02:07 where it's like Chris Rock and Ice-T going Damn so I was like ooh it's a nice one that burns
Starting point is 01:02:15 Yikes well I know Chris Tucker Chris Tucker oh no not Chris Rock Is this kid bald and like
Starting point is 01:02:20 maybe the kid's sick This kid must fucking suck though Yeah that's true Can't use the words Was he just whiny? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:26 But maybe his head was round and bald. Maybe. And he's asking for it. We're not head shaming Caillou. Caillou's not real. We can shame away. Well, I mean,
Starting point is 01:02:35 Caillou's baldness is the worst at least of his problems. It's true. Yeah. It's true. He's kind of whiny, right? He's just a little wet.
Starting point is 01:02:41 Is he sick? Wimpy. Well, I don't know. Sickly. He looks sick. Yeah. He's bald. At least Charlie Brown had like a little wet is he sick wimpy no well i don't know sickly sick yeah he's bald at least charlie brown had like a little swirl of hair yeah i don't know is caillou sick yeah that's what i'm googling is caillou dead we'll see if he's even still with us oh he is sick he's uh
Starting point is 01:02:58 riding a skateboard and doing a cool trip oh Shit. A long existing urban legend is that the four-year-old boy has cancer, which is one of the reasons why his parents always let him get his way. However, this simply isn't true. He gets his way because he's a whiny suckle. But his parents also suck. He's got bad parents. Yeah. So you got one.
Starting point is 01:03:22 And the other one was I was at shoppers in the seasonal aisle around easter time and i was just looking for regular just whatever i could find for the kids hey to put in a basket yes oh that plastic hey absolutely it's paper now oh is that yeah and i reuse it every year still reuse it um but there's two young women walking around looking for, they were just talking and looking and like selecting products and stuff. Women love products. Women, they be shopping. And one of them says, I don't know, like it's a dinner party. So we should bring something, maybe something like how about some chocolate for after dinner?
Starting point is 01:04:02 That'd be nice. And they start looking at all the Easter chocolates. I'm like, what about this? And what about this? And what about this? And then the other girl stops and says, wait, isn't everyone there Jewish? And the girl's like, good point. Maybe we try something.
Starting point is 01:04:18 Maybe we get some like veggies and dip or something. Oh, that sucks. If you find out I'm Jewish and I suddenly don't get chocolate I get veggies and dip I don't know Bring a Kugel Isn't that like a snack
Starting point is 01:04:29 I don't think they have a Kugel A chopper unfortunately Yeah what's their babka selection On the frozen Yeah McCain's brand McCain's even delicious Chocolate babka
Starting point is 01:04:40 I'd eat it Yeah me too I wouldn't I don't like McCain's Even delicious Yeah well That's why this marriage works David I'd eat it Yeah me too I wouldn't I don't like McCain Stephen delicious Yeah well That's why That's why this marriage
Starting point is 01:04:48 Works David Dave do you have An overheard Yeah Cause I'm deep And you're delicious Wait Wait
Starting point is 01:04:55 Which one would you Rather be Deep or delicious I'm a little bit of both You can both be A little bit of both I do have one And it is also from a drugstore, but this drugstore is called London Drugs. Okay.
Starting point is 01:05:12 Yeah. Nobody does it better. Is that right? I forget. I forget what their thingy is. I think you're thinking of The Spy Who Loved Me. Yes. Yes.
Starting point is 01:05:20 thing he is. I think you're thinking of The Spy Who Loved Me. Yes. Yes. The and there was an old woman and she was there was a pharmacist was like had left the
Starting point is 01:05:36 pharmacy area and was like helping her find a product and he took out it was one of those blood pressure sleeves. Yeah. I guess that you can buy and use at home, I'm sure. Sphagnonominator. Something like that. Sphagnonominator.
Starting point is 01:05:53 It's the Sphagnonominator. Sphagnum. Perpetrator. Yes, perpetrator. Thank you. Sphagnum. Sphagnonominator. It's Sphagnum the. The stuff that used to be in pads. In pads. Sphagnum. Big monometer. Is Sphagnum the...
Starting point is 01:06:06 The stuff that used to be in pads. In pads. I don't think they do it anymore. In natural pads. Anyway, she's getting her blood pressure monitor thing, and the guy's opening it up for her, takes it out of the box, and puts it on her arm,
Starting point is 01:06:20 and he says, this one fits most people who live in this area. Sure. We feel like the neighborhood's got kind of a size vibe
Starting point is 01:06:33 but yeah let's try this one on. Where are you from? Wait are you from this neighborhood? Do you live around here? What are you kind of a commercial
Starting point is 01:06:40 drive person? Well you can try it on I don't know if it fits. I can't promise anything. This kind of only fits people from this area. From this elbow to shoulder area?
Starting point is 01:06:49 I guess I have noticed mine is similar to everybody else's in the neighborhood. Yeah. I guess I start paying attention
Starting point is 01:06:55 when I go to their neighborhoods, I guess. Every time I shake somebody's hand, I'm like, where does my hand end and
Starting point is 01:06:59 where do they begin? Oh, boy. I was down by the docks in a whole other area and there was this guy with
Starting point is 01:07:03 huge forearms and very skinny upper arm and then boy he sucked some spinach through his pipe and his forearm turned into like a steamship oh boy who is this guy you're talking about?
Starting point is 01:07:17 I don't know he was strong to the finish because he eats his spinach and he kicked my ass because I was you know trying to put the moves on his skinny little girlfriend. Not to body shim. Yeah. You probably feel one of those cuffs over her whole body
Starting point is 01:07:34 that don't want to talk about it. She does not live in this area. Yeah, she's one of those docks gals. Don't docks gals. No, don't. Don't. Let's not um my overheard is just actually from the walk over here i was like do i have an overheard today i passed three construction workers and one of them said boy it's supposed to be hot and the other one said
Starting point is 01:07:57 nice referring to the weather yeah well maybe not maybe it's a little arring to the weather? Yeah. Well, maybe not. Maybe he gets a little aroused by the weather. Rawr. Ooh, have you seen the sun in those sunglasses? I'm trying to test the shades. Wear over by the Raisin Bran. Do you think they still have two scoops in there? Yeah, by law. Says all right in the box.
Starting point is 01:08:21 Yeah, it's like Zellers. Lowest price is the law. Two scoops. Definitely two scoops. Don't say what size the scoops are. No, no, no, no, no. Yeah. It's like Zellers. Lowest price is the law. Two scoops. Definitely two scoops. Um, don't say what size. No, no,
Starting point is 01:08:28 no, no, no, no. We're not going to talk about whatever the amount is. Cut it in half. That's one scoopy. Uh,
Starting point is 01:08:33 what, uh, did you go to the Zellers when they redid Zellers? No, I haven't because I don't think our, the Bay has it. Yeah. I don't think it's good
Starting point is 01:08:45 I loved Zellers me too I loved Zellers but I did not but I think people think they loved Zellers
Starting point is 01:08:53 but Zellers you know smelled bad and had stained floors and ceilings it was always a mess but they had what
Starting point is 01:09:01 I was looking for yeah and cheap yeah Zellers for our American listeners is a Canadian sort of like
Starting point is 01:09:08 It's like a Target but not Target. And then it went out of business 20 years ago and they've since been like we're bringing back
Starting point is 01:09:16 every time they bring back anything old like that they never are really doing it. Right. It's just some publicity stunt.
Starting point is 01:09:22 It's never gonna last. It's not a thing that's gonna be around for 20 years we'll burn through our money in about 5 years and then we'll
Starting point is 01:09:27 pack up what did you ever buy at a Zellers that you remember school supplies yeah I would get some back to school
Starting point is 01:09:35 clothes yeah back to school clothes houseware stuff like a new bath mat I remember we went to Zellers for
Starting point is 01:09:40 everything it was like the cheap department store we went to Zellers or we went to Byway yes Byway they had the like the cheap department store. We went to Zeller's or we went to Byway. Yes.
Starting point is 01:09:46 Ooh, Byway. They had the bins. You had to search through to find a matching shoe. The best. Now, London Drugs. Now that place has got a smell. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:53 London Drugs, he said nobody does it better. Zeller's. Lowest price is the law. One of the lowest prices of the law. Zeddy, there's a new sheriff in town.
Starting point is 01:10:01 Yeah. Poor Zeddy. Zeddy was the... Was he a bear? He was a bear. He was the mascot. Yeah. He Zeddy. Zeddy was the... Was he a bear? He was a bear that wore a t-shirt. Yeah. He's dead now.
Starting point is 01:10:08 How did he die? He was in a showdown with somebody else who was like... On public freak out. Oh my God. Yeah, they were saying, I'm the law.
Starting point is 01:10:16 It was Judge Dredd who killed him. Oh my God. He doesn't take no shit that Judge Dredd. Now we also have overheard sent in by people
Starting point is 01:10:24 from all over the world now you were telling me you don't want to do this anymore i think we're good i think you're good you told me in private we talked about this before you were like this is the worst part of the show yeah we should just skip the phone calls um listener don't worry graham and i don't talk i was out of the show we keep it all fresh i blindsided him with that one uh this first one comes from danny f in chicago danny f man from oingo boingo is that a real thing no danny elf no elfman. Oh, Elfman. Yes, okay. I was walking in Chicago and passed a couple, and in a nerdy voice, the guy said to his girlfriend, so then he said, let me out of prison or I'll send Dracula after you.
Starting point is 01:11:14 What a dork. What a dork was part of it? No, I just added it. What a dorkus, you know? That he'd be saying that to somebody else. Way to go. Come on, Caillou. What a threat,us, you know? That he'd be saying that to somebody else. Way to go. Come on, Caillou. Yeah, whatever.
Starting point is 01:11:25 That's right, Caillou. Let me out of prison or I'll send Dracula after you. I don't think that's dorky. I think it's a good... You think that's a good use of a Dracula? Did a six-year-old tell you this? Yeah. This is an argument a six-year-old would make.
Starting point is 01:11:37 Yeah. Well, it was a couple. We know that. So it may have been a couple of six-year-olds. Maybe he was quoting. Ooh, I have a different overheard, but it's a longer story. I would like to hear it. Sorry, we're all out of time.
Starting point is 01:11:48 We're going to let you on another five years. This is somebody, Arlene from Ontario. She's in Alberta. They're boarding a plane back to Ontario. There was a fellow passenger having a very loud phone conversation. Probably the least private place to have a discussion. That's true. The part we could hear of this telephone call was him telling someone,
Starting point is 01:12:10 we decided not to get married after all, so I'm on my way home. We're going to stay friends. Whoa. Shit. That's what I was still thinking. Yeah. We're going to be really good. We're going to be the best of friends.
Starting point is 01:12:27 Yeah, I'm coming home early. You know, that whole thing came for a... Don't worry, it didn't work out. But it's fine. We're friends now and it's great. We're better as friends. Yeah. We threw our rings into the sea. In Alberta.
Starting point is 01:12:42 That's right. It's going great. Into the cowboy sea. In the middle of Alberta. I don't know. You're from there. I believe you. To get all the way to the altar and then be like, she didn't leave me at the altar. We're going to be friends.
Starting point is 01:12:57 Actually, it was the priest's fault because he said, do you want to just be friends? And we both said yes. They should offer that. Yeah, that should be part of the package. Do you want us to do a last minute? Well, they let other people have an opportunity to shut the whole thing down. You should let the two people who are doing it have a chance to shut it down at the last minute, too.
Starting point is 01:13:17 That's the best part about being a janitor at a church. Because you get to, any time, say, I oppose. Just kidding, you guys. Yeah, these two are brother and sister just kidding no they're not the other best part of being a janitor is getting all that rice eating all that rice that's right free rice but then your stomach explodes yeah wait so like us those yeah those jan. I got janitors and pigeons mixed up. Yeah. They both wear gray. That's right.
Starting point is 01:13:49 Yeah. More brown. This one is from Jessica in Kansas City. This is in the vein of Dave's boring dreams. I dreamt that I went to my bank to discuss changing my savings account. But I never got around to it because I just made small talk with the banker until I woke up. Nice.
Starting point is 01:14:14 Just having small talk with a stranger in your dreams. Yeah. Nice. So, anyways. The weather today. Big game this weekend. I had a dream last night that I was on a podcast. A different podcast that I listened to.
Starting point is 01:14:31 I won't say which. Joe Rogan. But then I was, I felt like it did not go well. That's why I don't want to say which. But then afterwards, me and the two hosts of that show, we left and a guy came at us with a knife, but he was very wobbly. Nice. And I started running away. And they were like, don't run away from this.
Starting point is 01:14:56 We can just push him over. This is not a threat. Now, Abby, before I get to the next part of the show, did you have another overheard? I did. I remember. I'll cut it short because it can be a very long story. When I was walking, we're in Karestan.
Starting point is 01:15:09 We have plenty of time. I was walking and I was, I think I'd just come out of a store or a coffee shop and I was on my phone and I wasn't really paying attention to what was going on around me
Starting point is 01:15:16 and I'm just slowly walking to the corner to cross the street to get to my car, yada, yada, yada. And I can hear two people or one person having a conversation with another person in front of me speaking very loudly, very energetically, very like big arms, big voice, lots to say. And the other person is practically silent, whatever.
Starting point is 01:15:38 And we get to the corner and we're waiting for the light to change. And I hear it's a man and a woman probably maybe 50s 60s and i hear the man turn to the woman and say but you wouldn't understand that because you're too stupid and before i even realize what's happening i look up and i've said you can't say that to her and then i talked i look at the woman i say you do not need to talk to a person who treats you like this like you like do you do not need to entertain this wow to have someone talk to you like this and the guy is getting so mad at me he is escalating screaming he's like you don't know what you're talking about and And was she like, I am stupid.
Starting point is 01:16:25 Yeah, he's right. Don't be shit. So, and I'm, again, I'm mostly focusing on the woman. I don't have time for this guy. And I'm just saying like, I'm going this way. Do you need to come with me? And the guy's screaming. And he's like, I'm not even talking about her.
Starting point is 01:16:39 I'm talking about Christine Taylor. And in my mind, I'm like, Ben Stiller's wife? Or like, I'm trying to think, is there a politician named Christine Taylor? My mind is racing. Who the fuck is Christine Taylor?
Starting point is 01:16:53 And he was saying, he was quoting like he was talking to this Christine Taylor person. He was calling her stupid. Not his sister, who I realize is the person he's talking to.
Starting point is 01:17:02 She's just listening to this story. And she's just like, this obviously, like now that I've put together, she said, I'm talking to my sister any who I realize is the person he's talking to. She's just listening to this story. And she's just like this, obviously, like now that I've put together. She said, I'm talking to my sister any way I want. I wasn't even talking to her. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And in my mind, I'm like, oh my God, you poor fucking woman have been stuck with this man as your brother your whole life. And you were just used to, it's okay. Hand on the shoulder.
Starting point is 01:17:23 It's fine. I understand. I can blah, blah, blah, can't christine taylor is stupid he's dirt although she's very good in the brady bunch movie yeah so and then and then i immediately like oh i'm sorry i misread the situation my like i'm profusely apologizing i did not mean to interrupt it is not my he is still screaming at me. Oh Jesus. And now he's screaming at me about me.
Starting point is 01:17:49 Right. Not about Christine Taylor or his sister. Okay. And I'm walking away. He's still screaming at me. We, we split up at a corner. He stays to turn to go another way.
Starting point is 01:17:58 And I keep walking. I luckily I had it in, in the, in the moment. I was like I'm really sorry for interrupting you I absolutely misunderstood
Starting point is 01:18:08 it still seems like you're a piece of shit wow and then I walked away wow and then I turned around and was like oh my god
Starting point is 01:18:16 I can't believe I thought to say that then wow I didn't think of it five minutes later in my car the usually demure Abby Shumka
Starting point is 01:18:24 all of a sudden picking street fights at any point did anyone I've heard this story before but I forget Think of it five minutes later in my car. The usually demure Abby Schumacher all of a sudden. At any point, did anyone in the... I've heard this story before, but I forget. Did anyone in the thing... Like, no one laughed? No. No one was like, oh, no, I mean the other Christine Dale? But we talked about that.
Starting point is 01:18:38 Maybe you and I, after it happened, how, like, this could have been such a funny thing. Oh, yeah. Had this guy not been a piece of shit. Had he not continued yelling at me. I was so ready to take the blame and take the hit. It's my bad. I'm absolutely in the wrong. And I was like, nope.
Starting point is 01:18:57 You suck. I could imagine that if I was like. Can you imagine telling that story later? Oh my God, this woman came up to me and she thought I was talking to my sister. And we laughed. Oh, we laughed. Such a misunderstanding.
Starting point is 01:19:09 Then I just yelled at her some more. Yeah, then I just screamed. And then she called me a piece of shit. And I was like, you know what? You're right. Well, that's a great one, Abby. That is a great one. And in addition to overhears that are written in, we also accept your phone calls.
Starting point is 01:19:22 If you want to call us, our phone number is 1-844-779-7631. That's one. Ugh. SpyPod one like these people have. But I do appreciate the Twiglets and I do appreciate the strawberry candies. From nuts.com. Yes.
Starting point is 01:19:40 Have a nut or a candy. You don't have to be nuts to work here, but it helps. Hi, Dave and Graham. It's Sheila calling. Yay! As you may recall, I work at a school, and over the different campuses, it goes from kindergarten
Starting point is 01:19:57 all the way up to 16-year-olds, 18-year-olds. And I just heard one girl ask her friend, do you think your brother's emo? And the girl replied, no, I know her brother. He's six. Well, no friggin' way. Off I go.
Starting point is 01:20:17 He's not emo. He's six. He's six. Same number of letters, right? Six in emo? Yeah, six in emo. Very good, Graham. Thank you of letters, right? Six in emo? Yeah, six in emo. Very good, Graham. Thank you.
Starting point is 01:20:28 Are you six? I'm emo. You guys know that. I think six is one of the most emo ages. Yeah, there's a lot of emotionary things happening. Tough age, tough age. Kindergarten, right? You're starting school.
Starting point is 01:20:43 Yeah. It's fucking up, man. Shit's different now. Yeah. The training wheels come off your bike. You start to notice boys you like. That's seven. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:20:52 Come on. Don't get confused. Well, thanks, Sheila. Next phone call. That's a Simpsons, right? Simpsons. That's when Michael Jackson writes, Lisa, it's your birthday. That's right.
Starting point is 01:21:05 Hi, Dave Graham, Impossible Guest. I just saw a car. No, this is Phillip from Minneapolis. I just saw a car with a license plate cover that said, beep beep, I love to drive my car. No friggin' way. No friggin' way, man. That's the license
Starting point is 01:21:20 plate frame I need. Yeah. Oh, that's great. I love driving, beep beep. Beep beep. Yeah, Oh, that's great. I love driving, beep beep. Beep beep. Yeah, instead of Dilawri Automotive Group. Yeah, exactly. Jim Poplinski's auto, yes. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:21:33 Wolf Subaru. From the Richmond Auto Mall. Yeah. Boy, I don't know where I saw this video or maybe it was like on a car show, but I just remember
Starting point is 01:21:44 seeing a clip of being like, when you buy your car from a dealership, they will put their proprietary license plate holder on. License plate frame. You can ask them to not do that. It's going to cost you extra, though. Because you do not need to do free advertising for them. Heaven forbid. Yeah. But I don't mind, you know, if they gave me a good deal.
Starting point is 01:22:06 Sure. Yeah, which they did because I'm an expert negotiator. Yeah, and then when I go back to, like, get it checked up, they know it's from there. That's the proof. Yeah, and they treat you better. Yeah. I'm like, yeah, I'll give you, I'll pay you an extra thousand dollars if you can take that thing off.
Starting point is 01:22:22 No deal. Yeah, no deal. Don't know how. It's integral to the car. It'll fall apart. Structural integrity. Yeah, exactly. Beep, beep. V Yeah, no deal. Don't know how. It's integral to the car. It'll fall apart. Structural integrity. Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 01:22:28 Beep, beep, vroom, vroom. I love to drive a car. And finally. Hello, Dave and Graham and possible guests. This is Louie from
Starting point is 01:22:37 Calgary. I was listening to your episode with Aaron Eves and it reminded me of a time in my 30s When I was required to Go see a proctologist
Starting point is 01:22:49 And the proctologist Was a South African gentleman His name was Dr. Cock K-O-K No friggin' way No friggin' way? Yes friggin' way Dr. Cock Cocktologist
Starting point is 01:23:05 Yeah He's in the wrong area Yeah Put the camera up Yeah Instead of there Yeah They do it too
Starting point is 01:23:13 They'll do it Oh sure They'll do it Put the camera up Your pee hole They don't give a shit They've got all sorts Of different cameras
Starting point is 01:23:19 And you know As long as there's A good director That knows what they're doing Yeah man Yeah You see all those Cave paintings on the inside? Do a nice little dub.
Starting point is 01:23:29 But then a documentarian comes by to videotape you. You are bad. Oh, no. This is going to be bad. Oh, no. This is going to be an unfinished penis. I knew it was trouble when they used the same size camera for the penis and the butt. And it was a film
Starting point is 01:23:45 camera. It's not video. So we had to keep reloading. Check the gate. You're gonna want to check the gate. There's gonna be a lot of hair there. I guarantee it. Ray, y'all, ma. Please don't interrupt our pee-pee poo-poo talk with hair. Well, oh hair. Well.
Starting point is 01:24:05 Oh, boy. Well, this has been nothing short of a blast. Abby, thank you so much for being our guest. See you in four years. Four years. No. See you in three. One degree.
Starting point is 01:24:17 I'm going to go back to school when I've done my degree. I'll have you back. It'll be there. What am I getting my degree in? Rooting, tooting, shooting And? Palutin Far palutin
Starting point is 01:24:29 High palutin Vladimir Putin The high palutinist Well thank you to people who sent us stuff through the mail That's very kind Fantastic Fantastic If you want to send us anything
Starting point is 01:24:42 We think our address is on the website MaximumFun.org. Like every episode, I put our contact details and then people just write and say, hey, how do I send stuff to you? Yeah. So, go to MaximumFun.org. The problem is we switched UPS stores. The UPS store closed and then switched to a very similar address. Just up the street. Just up the street. And now it's... Sometimes people have been sent the old address.
Starting point is 01:25:10 Yes. So... But I'm reasonably certain that the one on the website is the correct one. Yes. Okay. So look to the website. But only... Don't go back and look at old posts.
Starting point is 01:25:21 No, no, no. Don't go in the Wayback Machine. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah. The current address... The Today Machine. Yeah. Mm no. Don't go in the Wayback Machine. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, the current address. The Today Machine. Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 01:25:27 Yeah. Not the Wayback Machine. Which I called the calendar. The Today Machine. Yeah. And yeah, thanks for that. Thanks for listening. If you're out there and you like the show, why not tell your friends?
Starting point is 01:25:41 And come on back next week for another episode of stop like as yourself maximum fun.org comedy and culture artist owned audience supported

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