Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 847 - Allie Entwistle
Episode Date: June 11, 2024Improviser Allie Entwistle returns to talk Spice World, falling asleep in public, and Furiosa....
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Hi, he's Dave Schumke.
And he's Graham Clark.
And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself.
Woo!
Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 847 of Stop Podcasting Yourself.
My name is Graham Clark and with me as always is a man whose grin was so big when I stuttered
just a little bit there, Mr. Dave Shumka.
It's the only thing you need to nail.
And I never did.
You never do.
I bet it's great.
I'm glad, like, you know what?
To err is human, to forgive is divine, baby.
Dave, you are divine. Everyone knows that the divine Dave Schumke
Mr. S
Is that bet Midler's the divine miss M? Yes. Okay, and I have spilled water all over my groin
Well, we all make mistakes, you know what to air is human
Divine mr. C.
Our guest today, a returning guest to the podcast.
Oh, so funny.
She has a show every last, or every third Friday
Last?
Every month, last Friday.
It's the last one, last Friday.
Last Friday of every month, called Brunch
at Little Mountain Gallery, 110 Water Street.
It's Alli and Willow.
Hello.
Was it?
Oh yes.
We still doing that?
We still doing that?
We're still doing that.
Coming in hot, I like that.
Oh, you gotta.
Budweiser, king of beers.
How, when did it ever, do we ever stop doing that?
Not me, not me and that's important to remember.
You also, you do Bud, yeah, you do the Budweiser.
I do Budweiser.
Yeah, which one are you?
Wizz-A!
Oh, okay, I'm Ur.
You're Ur.
How old would you have been when this came out,
when that came around?
I, you know what, I think I was probably like in between,
I was probably between 10 to 12 in that range
because I remember my younger brother
was like six and he got in so much trouble because we were I guess my my dad called home
and my younger brother answered the phone as was it when he was like six and my dad was
like that is not how we answer the phone in this household.
That rules.
Yeah that does rule.
So that's how I remember how old I was.
I mean, it's feels like that would have been like the greatest time,
greatest age to learn about waza.
Although, you know what, it was great at my age.
When you answer the phone at your parents' house, did you have to say
because sometimes we always had Huxtable residents.
Yeah. Did you say Huxtable residents?
Interesting. Yeah.
Or like, hello, Graham speaking. Yeah, Ixtable Residence. Yeah, did you say Huxtable Residence? Oh, interesting, yeah. Or like, hello, Graham speaking.
Yeah, I think I said, hi, hello, this is Ali speaking.
Ali speaking, okay.
And I think I still say that.
Hey, this is Ali, I go for Graham.
Yeah, I love that.
I give Doc to me.
You got Graham.
I'm seriously considering changing my
outgoing voicemail message to just text me.
That's good.
That's fun.
Because anyone who leaves a message, it just ends up being a scam.
I'm just, yeah, I'm calling you and...
Hi, I want you to get your car serviced again.
Okay.
Yeah.
You're like, I don't want to.
Hey, do you know what the weirdest thing is, is when you're calling like a good friend
of yours and then you get sent to their voicemail, number one, rude.
They shouldn't do that.
And then you hear their outgoing message,
and it's always so embarrassing.
My best friend, Carrie, who co-wrote the retros with me,
her is just like, hi, this is Carrie, please have a message.
And it's like, who is that?
Yeah.
You know?
Yeah, who is that?
Who is that?
Well, I think the thing too is I, like, I just changed providers.
So my old voicemail now just says like Box 10723 is not available.
That's gorgeous though.
They got the person with the tracheotomy talk box.
Do we want to get to know us?
Yes.
Get to know us.
Allie.
Graham.
How are you?
Me?
I'm well.
Yeah?
Yeah.
What's going on?
Tell us a little bit about what's happening in the world of Allie.
What's happening in the world of Allie?
Well, you know what?
I got to bike here this morning.
Okay.
And I love bike season.
Yeah.
I mean, just when it's sunny out, I love to bike.
What kind of bike do you have?
Fixie? Do you have a fixie?
No, I've got many, many gears.
Okay.
I said as many as you can get.
No, I got a road bike when I was 16 and I still have it.
Wow.
Isn't that insane?
That is insane.
It makes no sense.
It should, it-
It should have been stolen by now.
Like, yeah, it should have been stolen.
Yeah.
Don't steal my bike.
If you're listening to this, don't steal it.
Don't take this as a dare.
Did you lock it up up front?
No, I locked it up on Camby.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, because I knew there was a lock there.
And also there's a lot of traffic.
Lot of traffic.
Yeah.
What kind of lock are we talking about?
U-lock?
Yeah, I got a U-lock.
I had a really bad lock for a really long time though,
and people would always be like,
you should get a better lock.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Do you ever see those ones that are like a giant,
like they look like a tugboat chain?
Yes.
Yeah.
That's heavy to carry around.
That's a lot.
I have a lock that I think is more expensive than my bike.
Well, what kind of lock?
It's a, boy, it's like, I couldn't even describe it.
It's an ABUS, A-B-U-S, and it's like little,
it forms a chain eventually.
Yes, I've seen these ones.
I know what you're talking about.
And they fold up really small.
Yeah, yeah.
But you're safe with, obviously the U-lock is-
It's working.
It's done very well for you.
Yeah, actually it's funny, my bike is like,
so it's an American made, or the American made bike
that like is like a, yeah.
They don't make bikes in America anymore.
It's a LeMond if you're a bike head.
It's a LeMond.
But it's just this funny.
I don't know what it is.
I think they don't make this frame anymore or something
because it's the kind of bike where if I'm at a stoplight
like in Vancouver, a 40 to 60 year old man will inevitably,
yes, come up beside me and be like,
you didn't care that thing?
Oh, they're more talking to the bike than you.
They're like, wow, it's a nice frame.
Yeah, that's pretty good frame.
You're ashamed that anything happened to it.
Yeah, you didn't care that thing?
Yeah, I'm like, what the hell?
You know what, one of the great,
I think all time great smells is going into a bike store.
The rubber?
Yeah, the rubber in a bicycle store.
A little bit of oil.
Yeah.
Yeah, a little bit of oil in there.
Yeah.
It's a very specific smell.
Yeah, it's a, yeah, yeah.
Dude, can you fix a chain?
Can you change the tires?
Can you do all that stuff?
Um, no.
Uh, well, look, the chain falls off.
I don't know what to do with it.
You know what I'm saying?
Put it back on.
I'll pump a tire, but you know, I just leave it to the professionals.
Sure. I say, I go to Rad Cycles.
There's a guy named, they're named Robert.
That sounds pretty cool.
He fixes my bike all the time.
And so you've had it since you were 16.
Yeah.
How many tires have you been through?
Not actually as many as you think.
Okay.
I know, I rip like two to three.
You take care of that thing.
I take care of that thing.
Yeah.
Is it a LeMond?
It's a LeMond.
Oh, LeMond.
You've heard of that?
Yeah, it's a LeMond.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm taking care of that thing. I've heard of Greg LeMond. Yeah, who's this? You've heard of that? Yeah, it's a LeMond. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I'm taking care of that.
I've heard of Greg LeMond.
Yeah, that's who's bike it is.
Is he a cyclist?
Yeah.
Oh.
He was pre-Lance.
He was a pre-Lance cyclist.
He was the big...
He was a contemporary of Canadian cyclist Steve Bauer.
Is that...
No, Bauer is the type of skate that's not a type of bike.
And who was the Spanish guy who...
Miguel Indurain?
I couldn't forget.
Have you ever been to that place a few blocks from here that is a bike shop and coffee shop?
Yeah.
I've heard of this.
I've never been.
I've had the coffee.
Not bad.
You can order it at the outside window.
Yeah.
And it's not bad.
And I remember when it was just a bike shop and then they transitioned into bike slash
coffee shop.
Never brought a bike in, but their coffee?
Not bad.
No?
Okay.
Might be all the oil in the coffee.
Yeah, it might be the oil.
Yeah, they put it right in.
Got a rubber smell.
Yeah, they put the tire lube right in there.
I don't know if you need lube for tires, but probably sometimes.
I definitely feel like I don't know anything about bikes. Yeah, yeah.
I have a bike that has gears
and I don't know what they do.
I know when I'm going uphill, it's like harder.
Yeah, yeah.
You put it in a lower gear when you're going uphill.
And just go higher gear.
That's true.
Those lower mean that your feet go faster
or you're pushing less?
I think on the ground you want a little resistance and when you're going uphill you want a little resistance.
I think you want more resistance.
Oh Dave, you're doing it wrong.
But I want to get up that hill faster without spinning my feet around.
Well, okay.
But I also never, like I don't know, there's one for the front wheel and the back wheel. Yeah, and I don't know how they work together
Yeah, and like there's one no way both are both of the brakes one operates the front one operates the back
What yeah, I don't remember the braking situation on a bike it's been literally like 20 years since I've been on a bike Wow
Yeah, we got to get you on one too scared on a bike. It's been literally like 20 years since I've been on a bike. Wow. Yeah, we gotta get you on one.
Too scared in the city.
That's fair.
I know a lot of people have been doored.
Yeah.
People have been hit.
Yeah, it's true.
And I know it doored is when you get into the doors.
No, it's when you get your fake ID
and they let you in the doors in a glove.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, yeah.
Go on.
Oh, go on.
I don't know what I was gonna say,
but I'm sure it was gonna be good. So you're a bike person. Oh, go on. I don't know what I was gonna say, but I'm sure it was gonna be good.
So you're a bike person.
Oh, bike person.
What are your other?
You wear a helmet?
I do wear a helmet.
Where's your helmet today?
Yeah, where's your helmet right now?
Did you lock it up?
No, it's by my bike.
Look, I'm pretty loosey goosey.
It's just not even locked up on my bike.
Oh, really?
So please don't come steal my helmet.
Yeah.
Please don't.
Does it have stickers on it?
It doesn't. Shit. I know. And what's the point of having steal my helmet. Yeah. Please don't. Does it have stickers on it? It doesn't.
Shit.
I know.
And what's the point of having a bike helmet?
Exactly.
Exactly what I say.
Do you have any other like springtime pursuits that you-
Oh, sure.
Biking is, that's like so spring.
So spring.
I know it's very spring.
What else am I springing?
I just bought some herbs for my my patio
What are you working with I got some mint yeah, and don't worry
I'm putting it in a separate pot because I know it takes over the garden. Yeah, I mean
Okay, a beast. It's a beast. It's a beast and then I got some dill on some chives and some basil nice, you know
Yeah, you're good. You're good to go. Yeah, Dave. What do you got in there spice wise? I got some dill and some chives and some basil. Nice. You know? Yeah, you're good. You're good to go.
Yeah.
Dave, what do you got in there spice-wise?
I got dill.
Yeah.
These are herbs, not spices.
Oh, herbs, sorry.
I've got cinnamon.
I've got cinnamon sticks.
Ooh, cinnamon sticks.
Cinnamon tree.
No, that would be a spice, I think.
Cardamom.
I've got the same.
You got dill.
Yep.
I've got chives.
Yeah.
Chives will come back year after year.
We love this.
Dill will not.
No. No, dill's a every year replant.
Yeah.
Ugh, what a pressure it's got.
You got oregano in there?
I don't have oregano, I have rosemary.
Rosemary.
And parsley and cilantro.
I was gonna ask about cilantro.
Damn.
Yeah, cilantro.
Yep.
I was gonna get cilantro, but I was like,
is enough of it gonna grow?
Cause when I use cilantro, it's like a cup at a time.
I know.
Is that...
I haven't been able to keep it.
It hasn't grown fast enough for me to cook with it.
What are you guys' favorite thing to put cilantro on?
I like a taco.
Personally, I like a taco.
I'd say like in a guac.
Guac's good.
In a guac.
I've been using it, I told you a few weeks ago, but those peanut butter noodles I make. I'd say like in a guac. Guac's good. In a guac.
I've been using it, I told you a few weeks ago about that, those peanut butter noodles
I make.
Oh yeah.
Nice, nice, nice.
Dave's become quite a gardener.
If you, would you ever get like a garden plot somewhere or is it balcony?
I think I'm not responsible enough yet.
Okay. You know, like it's like
your parents like I don't think you're responsible enough for a dog. I'm
self-checking. I'm like I can't because you know what's gonna happen? I'm gonna
really get into it for like two weeks and then I'm gonna forget. Yeah. And those
plants are gonna be dead. Yeah. So Graham, your wife, I want to say Sally. Her name's
Sally. She has a garden plot, two garden plots?
She's got a garden plot on one of these,
it's like a cooperative.
Yeah.
And man, she just brought home a bunch of radishes yesterday.
Oh!
Woo wee!
It's a bumper crop this year.
Yeah, yeah.
I love that.
Do you have a problem at all
with little creatures eating your veggies?
I've never grown veggies before.
Oh, this year We've planted some veggies
Tomatoes tomatoes potatoes no tomatoes potatoes
No, get out of here. You could be good. I think they come out of the ground. Uh-huh. Not all of them are GMO
I'm in a lab
Sorry, I have some cool views. You're gonna get into that
Cucumber
Cucumber. Cucumber? Yeah.
Peas and.
You got squash?
No, kale.
Nice, kale's smart.
And strawberries.
I feel like arugula would be smart.
Strawberries, I hope that works.
Arugula would be smart, but I don't like it.
Aw, it doesn't like arugula.
Is arugula the one that's kinda spicy?
Yeah, kinda spicy.
Yeah, I like that, I like that.
That's the exact level of spice I can handle.
No more.
You must have yelled at your wife so much
for bringing home radishes.
Oh man, too spicy.
Keep them away from me, I said.
You guys should do that show Hot Ones,
you know, with the chicken wings,
but instead it's just like pieces of arugula, you know.
A radish.
Honestly, that would be the level.
Yeah, a regular red pepper.
You like spicy, you like some heat?
You know, I really didn't, I mean, you know,
a white girl growing up in Kelowna, you know,
not a lot of spice options for me.
Not even at the pita pit?
Yeah.
Not even at the pita pit.
Not even at Fresh Asbestos salsa?
And I know what pita pit but that's from Kamloops Dave
Oh my god slander on the name
But then I got born to spice like in my
20s and then I was like, oh, this is actually I think I'm okay with it. Yeah
Yeah, but I'm not like out there gunning for it. Some people are like get me the spicy stuff
Yeah, I don't want that would Would you go like your medium spice?
Depends on who's making it.
Okay.
You know?
Now if you, if you were like 12 when
Wazzup came out.
Thank you.
How old were you when the spice girls came out?
I was in elementary school, so I was like seven, eight.
Did you, did they?
Oh, rule my freaking world.
Yeah.
Hell yeah they did. Did they spice up your life, I guess?
They spiced up my life in a real way.
I remember when Spice World came out.
Yeah.
One of the best movies of all time.
Seen it.
Thank you very much.
Did you see that?
Nope.
OK.
Well, it's a real British cameo off.
It's amazing.
Did they have Ricky Gervais?
Yeah, Ricky Gervais is in there.
Basically.
Yeah, he might have been in there.
Alan Cumming is in it, I think? Alan Cumming is in it? I think El Jon makes an appearance in it. Yeah. Yeah.
There's, it's great. And it came out on VHS. And I was at Roger's Video named
Dera. That's now, it's now a breakfast place in Kelowna. So weird. Okay. Just
totally switched over to Cora Breakfast. No, I love Cora. still have to get the breakfast off the shelf and we don't have that
Yeah, you can return the breakfast to the slot. Exactly. Yeah, and
Spice Girls was available on VHS. It's called Spice World. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you Dave. Thank you
Play to order.
Spice World was available on VHS for $16 and I remember-
Or to buy.
To buy.
Okay.
Okay.
Yeah, and my mom was like, Ali are you sure?
Because I was spending my allowance, like all my money on it.
Yes.
And she, I remember her asking me, are you sure?
Like eight times and I was like, Mom, do I look like I'm sure?
Yeah, I'm fucking sure.
I've never been more sure of anything in my life.
I've never been more sure.
The little goochie dress, the little goochie dress, oh, the little goochie dress.
That's from Spice Girls.
That's from Spice Girls.
Dave, you wouldn't get it.
Had you seen it before?
Oh yeah.
You saw it in theater?
Honestly, this was probably,
I don't know if I saw it in theater.
I was probably too young to really like be organized
and have to be like, mom and dad,
this is coming out in theaters and I wanna see it.
My dad actually bought me a Walkman for Christmas
so that he would have to like get to stop listening to Spice
Cross in the car. Yeah. So I don't think they were really that excited that I
liked the Spice Girls. Was it one of those soundtracks where they had like a
little little samples from the movie in between songs? I feel like that was a thing.
No, because the movie was really made for the album. So none of the albums had sound bites.
But I think I do remember there were some songs on the VHS and Spiceheads will correct
me if this is right.
You guys have a lot of Spiceheads.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I think there was a song or two on the movie that wasn't on the album.
Okay.
Okay.
I could be wrong. But man, I think it was honestly one of the best
economic decisions ever made. Oh, I was like, I was like,
Look, Mom, I'm gonna watch this movie so many times, that it's
gonna end up costing us more to come to Roger's video. Yeah,
every week to rent it. We can afford not to we can't afford
not to and you know what, I still have that VHS. Yeah, I
do. Is it? Because sometimes with have that VHS. Do you? Yeah, I do.
Is it, because sometimes with a crazy VHS, they'd be different color?
They'd be like, no, no, they didn't.
They spared expense on this.
They spared expense.
They're like, paper sleeve.
Like it wasn't, you know, none of that cushy Disney stuff.
Yeah.
No.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's, I had, when I was growing up,
there was a video store not far from where I lived
and we would rent the same video every weekend.
Which was?
Blackwell Jones.
Okay.
A Kung Fu movie from the 70s,
but you couldn't buy it anywhere.
So, and I offered to buy it from the store.
Would not budge.
So I had to, because they knew I was gonna come back.
I was gonna come back and rent it again.
What if you just didn't return it
and what would the charge have been?
I feel like in the nineties it was $300.
Yeah, yeah.
And it was my mom's account.
So then she would be like,
I didn't have my own account at the video store, come on.
Cause also you're not thinking about
the cost and integrity, Dave.
You know?
Losing face at the video store.
You're right.
Okay, you know what is, I don't understand the economics of right now is when before we had like a we didn't have like a Nintendo
Or a PlayStation when I was younger and so my mom like a couple times on like a long weekend
She'd go to Roger's video named up again. There we go and
Rent a console for the weekend
Yeah, yeah, but I'm like how much did that cost versus buying a Nintendo? You know?
Yeah, because they weren't like, were they always renting them out? I feel like we rented one out
for like a week in the summer once. Yeah. I feel like we also once rented a camcorder.
I love that. Rented one. Yeah. But then how do you play back the, does the camcorder. I love that.
Rented one.
But then how do you play back the,
does the camcorder just have VHS?
Oh, I think they were like, yeah, it was just VHS.
Oh yeah. Wow.
Wow, wow, wow.
Or it had like a thing where it had a little tape in it,
but you put it in a VHS size thing that you can then,
I don't know. Yes.
But yeah, I don't know about that.
Yeah, how does that work?
It's weird.
I remember someone like dug up an old Eaton's catalog
or Word Words or something.
That from like the early 80s that had, you know,
old video games and like an Atari system was $300.
The games were all $70. And I was like,
the games are still $70. Games have never not been $70. They're just always $70. Yeah. They
they got together and they're like, look, this is just how much it costs. It's a back then it was
you're paying, you know, $10 a pixel. Yeah.
Did you guys when you were younger, do you have consumers distributing?
Is that?
No.
Do you have that?
I know what you're talking about.
What is this?
It was, they would put out a catalog a couple of times a year
that was mostly, it was aimed at youths.
Mm-hmm, the youths.
So it was a lot of action figures, lots of video games.
Yeah.
But you would order it,
and then it was just like a store
that was, there wasn't anything there except the desk.
And you went to the desk and then they brought it from back.
Yeah, like you order, I want C1127
and they just bring out.
Have you been to Lee Valley Tools?
Yeah.
That's the same concept.
Fuck, that place is great.
Where you just like, you go, I, cause I, I needed,
what was it? It was some like.
Really specific kitchen tool.
Yeah.
It was like, or like a different grate to put on the, uh, like whatever the air vent.
And I was like, yeah, I'll just go to the store.
Like I could order it online, but I'll just go to the store and pick it up.
And then I went there and I was like, there's no aisles.
No, yeah. It's just a desk. Did they I went there and I was like, there's no aisles.
No, yeah.
It's just a desk.
Did they have some displays?
I've been in a Lee Valley that had to have cool displays.
Yeah.
I've actually looked at the catalog.
Yeah.
My grandma loves Lee Valley and she's getting older.
So when she asked me what I want for Christmas,
I just asked for something from Lee Valley.
Nice, smart.
It's easier and it's great.
We love Lee Valley.
Yeah.
They're a sponsor, right? Yep. And the other story I've always wanted to go to, never have been, but I bet it's great. We love Lee Valley. Yeah.
They're a sponsor, right?
Yep.
And the other story I've always wanted to go to, never have been, but I bet you it's a
lot of fun to go to, is Bass Pro Shops.
I feel like that's got a lot of, like, is there still one in Tawasin?
Yeah, there is.
Every time I pass by on the way to the ferry, I'm like, ah, I'm thinking about it.
Yeah.
Because I just want to see, because I bet you they have displays of the wazoo.
Definitely. Tants. Don't they have displays of the wazoo definitely
Tants don't they have really big fish tanks in there like I've seen videos of people getting into the tanks Well, there's one guy yeah, I've seen videos Dave. I'll show you where to go. Last year was the guy who got in and his penis disappeared
It was like you have footage he was
He was eaten by a trolley. He was smooth down there. Poor guy
He was, he was, he was eaten by a trolley. He was smooth down there.
Poor guy.
Oh, that was Ken, Ken.
It was a Barbie promo.
Barbie.
Viral Barbie promo.
Viral Barbie promo.
Barbenheimer hits again.
Yeah, what's gonna be this summer's Barbenheimer?
I don't know.
What's coming out this summer is the big question.
Deadpool.
Deadpool, another one?
That's what they called it.
Deadpool is another one. It's what they called it Deadpool
Yeah, what else the
Oh Somebody told me they saw a movie recently that I saw an ad for and wasn't sure that it actually existed called
Sasquatch Sunset. Oh dear and it's
Apparently, it's just like unbelievably bad. That's yeah, I think shy of both
No, Jesse Eisenberg it's just like unbelievably bad. That's, yeah. I think Shia LaBeouf said it or something. Oh, what an actor.
No, Jesse Eisenberg. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Rest in peace. Mm-hmm. They're over now. As far as I'm concerned. There was a lot of ads for Inside Out 2, the kids' movie about emotions, and it was like,
these are the official emotions of hockey.
And I was like, you feel joy when your team scores.
Wow.
Nervous.
And then like, isn't the twist this time like puberty
or something like that, like hormones?
Yeah.
Uh-oh.
Yeah, there's anxiety shows up, embarrassment.
That's one of the main emotions of hockey is puberty.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Ah!
I wanna ask that girl out, but I don't know.
I guess I'll shoot the puck.
Aw, I'm not goaltending very well.
My pubic hair.
This guy's gonna be, he's gonna miss two weeks with acne.
Oh no.
He's literally growing pubic hair in front of our very eyes.
I thought I had a puke once.
And then what happened?
I peed out of it.
Oh what? It wasn't even.
Yeah.
Oh.
Yeah, you guys, you guys have both been through puberty, right?
I think so. I looked at a couple books about it and it matched a lot of the symptoms.
Yeah.
I was like, what? My changing body. I was like, oh, that sounds right.
Yeah.
Exactly.
I'm going to run some tests.
I've done a lot of like, I must increase my bust kind of stuff.
Oh, certainly.
Oh my God.
Oh, certainly.
And you're doing shows.
You're through with your everyday.
I'm through with my everyday.
You've got a bike.
You've got a garden.
I've got a bike.
I'm doing shows.
Are you traveling at all?
Have you been traveling?
Have I ever?
Have you ever? Yes. I've traveled. You've got a bike, you've got a garden. I've got a bike, I'm doing shows.
Are you traveling at all? Have you been traveling?
Have I ever?
Have you ever?
I've traveled.
Go on.
I am gonna travel.
Oh, actually, you know what I'm doing?
A real BC thing.
Doing a real BC thing, never done it before.
Well, I've done it.
I'm going camping and surfing in Tofino.
Get out.
Camping and surfing in Tofino.
At the same time, tent in the water,
surfboard in the tent.
Shit, that's awesome.
You can just lock it up.
You lock it up, yeah.
So that feels like a real check mark.
You've never done surfing before.
I've surfed before.
Really?
Yeah, I'm a bit of a surfer.
Just kidding, but surfing like-
Can you stand up?
I can stand up.
Whoa.
Yep.
And, but I mostly flail.
Have you done it in Tofino before?
I've never served in Tofino.
Okay.
So that's the new part.
And I went camping in Tofino when I was a kid.
So yeah.
Yeah.
Um, I, we've never surfed.
I'll answer for you, Grant.
You've never surfed together?
Yeah.
You guys only surf together?
We got a tandem.
I mean, sure.
I'll go on a surf and safari, but I'll just sit there on the beach while the other boys
go and surf.
You know?
That's great.
No, I couldn't, I can barely handle the balance
of going up and down stairs.
So. Have you done a stand up paddle board, Graeme?
No. No.
That I find a little boring, I'll say it.
I'm like, I- You're an adrenaline junkie.
Yeah. Okay.
A little bit maybe.
Yeah, I'm like, well, if we're just,
we're just standing here?
Yeah. What am I doing?
Yeah. Yeah. And you're going, is this a if we're just standing here, what am I doing? Yeah.
Yeah.
And you're going, is this a crew you're going with
or is this a solo alley just getting to know?
Just my boyfriend.
Oh, sorry.
Going with my boyfriend.
Is he a surfer?
Not as much as me.
So it's gonna be two, just two people flailing in the water.
Are you a camper?
Yes, I love to camp.
I love to camp.
What do you love about it?
Getting dirty.
Yeah, getting filthy.
I think I love nature.
I love nature.
I love having a fire, smelling like fire.
Yeah, I like fires.
Also, I love doing crosswords,
like sitting around a campfire.
You can do that anywhere.
Oh, and I do, and I do.
Reading a book, going swimming.
Sure.
Eating food.
Eating food, but all outdoors.
All outdoors.
Going back, going out on the roof so loud.
What, is, is Tofino super cold all year long?
Like, you have to wear a wetsuit?
Yes, yeah, yeah.
It's always, always wetsuit time. and yeah, pretty like foggy, wet.
Yeah.
Are you gonna rent that stuff?
Yes, yeah.
Nice.
Yeah, I'm gonna rent it.
No, I keep an eight foot board in my studio apartment.
On my bike.
Yeah, and my bike, yeah.
That's a fun adventure.
It's a pretty fun adventure.
Do you, when you go camping, do you ever go like out in the,
out in the woods or always at a campsite?
Usually at a campsite.
That's too, going out in the woods is too,
that's too crazy.
I am doing that this summer though.
You are?
Yes, yeah.
How the hell, what the hell?
How the hell?
I'm doing a hike in camping trip with Amy Shostak.
You ever had her in the pond?
Yeah, absolutely.
Amy Shostak and I going out into the woods.
So you're just, the two of you just going on a,
what are you going on, a trail
or you just going straight into the woods?
Going on a trail, Joffrey Lakes.
So it's, you know, you like book a back,
it's like a back country camping site.
So you hike in.
Yeah, Graham's a back country camping site.
Yeah.
Yeah, hike in with a backpack.
You get there.
You gotta put your food in a big tall tree.
Yeah. So the bears don't come.
Graham, you'd love it.
You know what? Everything, it's a checklist of everything I like.
It is very funny talking about like active stuff with like
outdoor stuff with comedians because half comedians are like, no.
Yeah. I do feel sometimes like I'm really in the wrong city
that wise, because everybody's like, wow,
lifestyle here is great.
I'm like, no, I'm participating in this.
Ski in the morning, surf in the afternoon,
and all you can eat sushi.
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
Yeah, but sometimes it feels like a dirty secret
I hide from comedians.
That you're outdoorsy?
Yeah, I'm outdoorsy.
I'm like, sorry, I run.
When I started comedy, I run.
Embarrassing.
What comedians were you talking to?
Kill me.
They're like, I don't want to hear it.
I knew a comedian when I first started.
He was really funny, but he was like Mr. Active outdoor guy.
Mr. Active outdoor guy?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, huge.
And he would wear it.
He would go on a hike in the day and then do a set at night
and still be wearing hiking boots. Like a guy who wouldn he would go on a hike in the day and do a set at night and still be wearing like hiking boots.
Like a guy who wouldn't sweat from doing a hike.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, those.
Yeah, that's scary.
Yeah, I did once do I hiked Black Tusk name drop and which takes like names you dropped
Spice World.
What's up with the name drop?
Lamond was one a name drop. I think Lamond was one.
Lamond, a huge name drop.
But it's like a, you know, I think it's probably like a 12 hour hike or something.
And then I came...
Where is that?
It's like between Squamish and Whistler.
Oh, it's around here.
Yeah, it's around here.
But I feel like the name Black Tusk, it could be like...
Black Tusk.
It's in the Himalaya.
Yeah, that would have been really cool.
No, I'm not that outdoorsy.
But then I came back and did two improv shows and died.
It was really stupid.
Made no sense.
I saw a photo the other day
and I knew this was kind of the case,
but I didn't realize like how like the big of scope of it
is getting to the top of Everest.
There's just like this giant line.
Yeah. That just goes for like a couple miles down of Everest. There's just like this giant line. Yeah.
That just goes for like a couple miles down the hill.
So you're just standing in line.
And there are dead bodies that are like famous landmarks.
But that's like when you're at Disneyland
and they do like a little animatronic
while you're standing in line,
just like a fun kind of pass the time.
Everest, do you think they have fast passes?
Yeah.
Actually, I have a fast pass.
I'm on landing lane.
I have a fast pass.
Can I, I just have to, sorry, I booked this they have fast passes? Yeah. Actually, I have a fast pass. Yeah, I'm on landing lane. I have a fast pass.
Can I, I just have to have, sorry.
I booked this.
I could be a guide.
Have you been to Disneyland?
I have, I have, but not since I was young.
Mm, yeah.
Me too.
You've been as an adult.
I've been as an adult.
Yeah.
You a Disney adult?
No, I have children.
I'm not even a Disney, like, when I was a,
I didn't like Disney movies growing up.
And then I was like, I'll see all these when I have kids.
And then I did and I don't like them.
Yeah.
I was like, maybe I'll appreciate,
oh, everyone, all these grownups are enjoying Pixar movies.
Maybe I'll like them too.
No.
Which one do you like the least?
Oh, that one that came out last year, Elemental.
Didn't have to see it. About fire and a piece of fire. Oh, yeah water fall in love
Piece of fire this is how you know, we don't can't yeah
Go to your neighbors. Can you spare a piece of fire? We can't seem to get our
I wonder where the tension in that movie comes from. Oh, yeah, hard to say. It is like the, I feel like those movies have, like, you know, you read a screenwriting book
and it's like, oh, your movie must hit all these beats.
I feel like all the Pixar movies are just like slaves to the screenwriting books.
Yeah, to the beats.
Yeah, that's true.
And like, oh, this person has to have this quality.
Well, they're a piece of fire, so obviously.
Yes, they're fire.
Hmm, hmm.
Yeah, I do like the Pixar.
I grew up watching Disney cartoons and I liked them,
but you're Steamboat Willie.
Yeah, Steamboat Willie was my first.
First and, you know, still first love.
Oh, that's beautiful.
Yeah, I liked all the ones that-
In the public domain now, right?
Steamboat Willie?
Yeah. Yeah.
Some guys making a creepy horror movie
with Steamboat Willie.
They did one of Winnie the Pooh.
I hate that, I'll say it.
I don't like that.
I don't like it either.
Yeah.
I mean, I like that somebody's like,
all right, let's go nuts.
That is fun.
That's fun.
But I don't, I think that a horror movie-
Yeah. Yeah.
You would rather they do a porno?
Yeah.
Yeah, probably.
And you know what?
I find oftentimes porno does not wait for it to be.
Yeah.
Porno's no bad place.
Oh, Family Guy doesn't seem to be in the public domain.
Yeah.
Well, it must have the public domain fast pass.
Right to porn avenue.
Speaking of domain, you ever, you like romaine?
It's a lettuce.
Oh, the, look, good romaine, romaine on a good day?
Sure.
Romaine in my fridge, always brown around the edges.
Yeah.
I can't handle it.
Which one's romaine?
Is it the?
If you get a Caesar salad, it's that unless it's kale.
What if it's iceberg?
Is iceberg not in a Caesar salad?
No.
Iceberg's round, right?
That's like a cob, yeah.
Yeah, okay.
I get more of a green leaf lettuce as my normal.
That's your go-to?
Yep, the leafiest, greenest you can find.
Yeah.
Yeah, sounds pretty good.
I don't like that red leaf lettuce though.
What about a spring mix?
Oh, I love a spring mix. Dave's making a face. I'm making a face because I don't like that red leaf lettuce though. What about a spring mix? Oh, love a spring mix.
Dave's making a face.
I'm making a face because I don't like the prepackaged,
like the clamshell ones.
I like anything prepackaged.
There, I said it.
I don't want to prepare myself anything.
I want it to just be there.
I was, you know, groceries are very expensive now.
What?
Where are you hearing this?
Where are you shopping?
Yeah, what?
I shop at Dollar Home.
I go to camping places
and if they haven't secured their thermos of injury,
that's my camping places.
More.
Where I put a piece of fire on.
So I was in the grocery store
and got a big thing of strawberries
and they come in the big plastic clamshell,
and I always turn them upside down to see
are the ones at the bottom rotting.
And if they are, I think you should be able
to pick and choose.
Like open up, take out the bad ones,
replace them with some good ones from another package.
Why do I have to eat the cost?
I also don't understand,
because every other thing, fruit or vegetable,
is you get to do that?
Just pick your, what? I'm gonna start doing that. Yeah. Yeah. The hell man. Yeah, that's what's there
for right? Fuck man. I don't know. Maybe but they gotta start putting these strawberries
behind glass and locks. Or else you're gonna be picking and choosing. Yeah man. Yeah.
A lot of places, I feel like, have security now to make sure that you scan through, you're
not just running out with stuff.
Right.
There's a guy at Canadian Tire.
You do not want to fuck with that guy.
Oh really?
Upstairs or downstairs?
Downstairs.
Oh okay.
There's a guy that works the door and it's like-
You're good upstairs, David.
You're fine.
Yeah, upstairs the guy is B.O. Okay. There's a guy that works the door and it's like you're good upstairs. The guy's Bo. No, this is the downstairs guy and he very much looks
like he could be a bouncer at a club like giant guy very friendly but well if you
tried to run out you don't want to yeah yeah what's the best thing you guys have
ever run out of a store with? Oh my Lamond. You biked it out of the store.
I biked it out, yeah.
I, no I don't, I've never shoplifted.
Me neither.
Yeah, me neither.
I helped, I helped my friend shoplift.
An accessory to a crime.
Yeah, I did, I distracted the player.
A Claire's accessory to a crime.
Was that what it was?
Amazing.
One time actually, okay wait I want to hear how you were an accessory to a crime. Was that what it was? Oh. Amazing. One time actually,
okay, wait, I want to hear how you were an accessory.
Oh, I would distract by,
Oh my gosh.
There was a store that I don't know if you grew up with
called San Francisco.
Of course, yes.
So it was at San Francisco.
San Francisco for people unaware is like a Spencer gift.
Yeah.
But also like a little bit trashier maybe.
Yeah, I'd say trashier.
Like a lot of sex shirts.
Is it Spencer's gifts or Spencer's gifts?
Spencer's, I believe.
I feel like there's a little bit of
Mandela effect at work.
I feel, I swear it was Spencer.
It could be.
Oh.
I, but yeah, it would be a lot of like
gross t-shirts and stuff.
Yeah.
You know, your parents would never let you wear.
But yeah, I would just ask,
what can't you find,
and my friend was stealing, lighters
that when you light it, the clothes on the woman disappear.
Now that's fun.
Yeah. That's fun.
And you could be like,
how'd you burn your house down?
Well.
I was.
I got a fast pass to porn, haven't I?
And there was fire.
And you scoffed at our not having shoplifted.
What did you shoplift?
Yeah.
Look, I don't wanna get into my many crimes.
I want you to get into your many crimes.
But I do wanna tell about a time when I didn't shoplift,
but somebody I know did.
A girl who I went to elementary school with, and I will say her full name, Savannah Funk.
That is a name.
That's a good name.
Everyone went to elementary school with has the best name.
It's so true. Savannah Funk, she and somebody else stole, I can't remember who, oh, Christina Hartford together.
They stole.
The team.
I know.
A SpongeBob SquarePants thong.
Okay. Wow.
From what store?
I think, I believe it was in Ardennes.
Ardennes. Ardennes.
Ardennes, yeah.
Canadian, that's a Canadian Claire's or I don't know.
Isn't it more clothed?
Not at the time.
Now it is. Now it is a lot of clothes. But back then you could get a thong. It was mostly SpongeBob thongs? I don't know. Isn't it more clothed? Not at the time. Okay.
Now it is.
Now it is a lot of clothes.
But back then you could get a thong.
It was mostly spongebob thongs.
Yeah, mostly spongebob thongs and then also accessories and, you know, bad earrings and
that kind of thing.
And so this happened and they were getting followed around by mall security.
Yeah.
Sabrina, Sabrina, there's no Sabrina.
Sabrina Funk.
She told me about this on the bus on the way to a basketball game,
because we were both on the basketball team.
And I was very short.
I was terrible.
And then later that night,
Savannah's dad called my house
and was asking for intel on what happened.
And he was like,
yeah, being like, okay, what happened at the mall?
And I was like, I wasn't there.
Nice. Because I actually wasn't there. Nice.
Cause I actually wasn't there.
Yeah, but so, okay.
Savannah and Sabrina were doing it?
Christina, sorry, I said Sabrina by accident.
Were they both, they're stealing thongs each or just-
I believe there was one thong stolen.
And-
Put it to the three legged race.
I heard about it.
I heard about it, you know, on the bus.
How did you get a call just from- Exactly. I don't know. We know you heard about this. I heard about it, you know, on the bus. How did you get a call just from-
Exactly.
We know you heard about this on the bus.
Yeah, so tell me what happened.
And they were trying to get me to rat.
And I did not rat.
Good for you.
But look, Dave, as a parroting move,
if you found out that one of your kids had stolen,
you know, a piece of-
The first thing I do is I call a girl
from their basketball team.
Right?
The worst one.
I'd be like, what do you know about this?
So weird. Answer me!
Yeah, very bizarre.
Anyway.
Well, you're no snitch.
I'm no snitch.
Good for you.
Everyone should know that about me.
Yeah, they got away with it, I assume?
I hope so.
Yeah, me too. Yeah, take back the thong
Yeah, I hope they still have it
That would be a very like you get it on Mondays Wednesdays and Fridays
But also it's like a conspicuous thing that would maybe end up in the family laundry like
Yay, way to hold those. Cause that's Spongebob thong.
Yay.
That's very like 2005.
Yeah, yeah.
It's like, well, thongs were huge.
Spongebob was huge.
Yeah, Spongebob, put Spongebob on a thong.
Why not?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like the low rise jeans with a little bit of thong showing.
That's how I used to wear them.
And you know what?
I still, when they come back in a style, I'm ready to do it.
I'm willing to do the whale tail.
I'm willing to do it all.
That's amazing.
I love that.
Yeah.
I'm trying different looks this summer.
I'm tired with my old look.
What else are we trying?
I'm gonna try some airy pants.
Smart, a linen?
Yeah, linen.
I've been talking about this for years.
I know, but this is the year.
I feel like this is the year it's gonna happen.
Oh, you're just gonna wear jorts again. Oh. I've been talking about this for years. I know, but this is the year. I feel like this is the year it's gonna happen. I love that.
You're just gonna wear jorts again.
Oh.
It's my John Cena face that seems to never end.
You and Sandler, you both love him.
Yeah. Yeah.
Well, sometimes when I look at Adam Sandler,
I'm like, he looks very comfy.
He does.
He looks very comfy.
He looks like a comfy,
he's got nothing to prove to anybody.
He's got nothing to prove.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
Nothing to prove, he's done it all. You're just repeating's got nothing to prove. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Nothing to prove.
He's done it all.
You're just repeating the things Graham's saying.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, he's got nothing to prove.
He looks comfy, yeah.
That's actually how you do improv.
That's actually how you do improv.
That's actually how you do improv.
There you go, nice.
There it is.
See, we're all doing it.
There it is, see?
Stop copying me. What's going on with you, Dave?
Well, I've now entered a new phase of fatherhood.
Okay.
Okay.
So far, what the emotions so far have been?
Anger, happiness.
Are we talking about inside out or the five stages of grieving?
Is depression being sad, one of them?
Yeah, I think that's a new one.
What's the one that Meredith from the office
is the voice of?
Meredith from the office.
Who's Meredith from the office?
Oh, red hair.
Oh, Phyllis from the office?
Oh, Phyllis, yeah, Phyllis, yeah.
Oh, she's sad.
She's sad, she's sad, okay.
Anyways, you were saying?
I've now, twice in a week, fallen asleep in front of my children midday.
Now, is this your everybody's being quiet reading books and you fall asleep or this is in the middle of commotion?
The first one was I took one of my daughters to see a children's movie called Garfield.
Oh, yeah.
Garfield the movie. Garfield the movie.
Garfield the movie.
Thank God they got the most valuable,
best voice actor in the world.
Wait, is it? Chris Pratt.
Oh.
And he sounds a little- He got married to life.
He sounds like Mario a bit.
What?
To me, Garfield.
Gets me the lasagna.
That's my Italian.
Well, that is the crossover.
Yeah. Exactly.
Italian food.
Here's what's wrong with this movie.
Garfield and Odie should not be friends.
Oh, they're friends.
Yeah, Garfield should not care about John.
Yeah.
He only cares about lasagna.
Yeah. Yeah.
And Garfield should be more selfish.
Yeah.
And so for that reason, I'm out.
Is he sarcastic?
Yeah, of course.
Okay. Well, it feels like they-
Chris Pratt.
Didn't you hear?
Just feels like they've gone all wrong ways with this movie. Maybe he's authentic.
Maybe he just talks about his feeling.
And he's like, it's oddly Christian.
What? Pray unto God. He's like, it's oddly Christian. What?
Prayin' to God.
He wants to solve all his problems with love.
Ugh, they got rid of his character flaw, it sounds like.
Huh.
But yeah, it's very weird.
It doesn't feel like authentic Garfield.
Doesn't feel like the true Garfield I grew up with.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I fell asleep for about 10 minutes.
That's not bad.
No, that's good.
10 minutes for a movie in the theater?
In the theater.
Oh, please. That's no problems.
I feel like if you could go 10 minutes,
you'd probably go 20.
Yeah, I was gonna say.
You're watching a movie in the theater, you could go 10.
Why not 20? Why not the whole movie?
I feel like as the man of the family,
I feel like I need to be alert at all times in public.
But you'll wake up if anything happens, right?
I assume.
I mean, I assume she was there when I woke up.
So you fell asleep during a movie?
I've always, like it happened to me years and years ago
during Lord of the Rings,
cause there's just a lot of walking.
Oh please.
There's a lot of rings.
There's a lot of them.
A lot of walking.
Yeah.
But never since then have I ever been able to fall asleep
during a film in the theater at home.
Oh boy.
Please. Watch me.
Then I started, well the next day
I didn't fall asleep in the movie,
but I took my other daughter, my older daughter
to a not a children's movie,
but a movie I was like, I heard,
this is fun for the whole family.
Not Deadpool, is it Deadpool?
No. Okay.
It's fun for the whole family.
It's got like some swears, but there's like,
there's like no blood or anything.
There is blood.
What the hell is this movie?
What is it?
Oh yeah, you wanna guess?
Yeah, yeah, yeah you want to guess?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Challengers.
Nope.
And I heard it's like an action comedy.
Action comedy?
Is it, oh, the one with...
You got it, you got it.
Glenn Powell or whatever?
No.
No?
But they're...
Okay.
Are we still guessing?
How many action movies?
Fall Guy. Fall Guy.
Who's the faceless white guy in it who I can't remember?
Ryan Gosling?
Ryan Gosling said it? Oh, you think I remember that.
He's not faceless. He's all face.
But speaking of, I did not know who Glenn Powell is.
And then if you were like, I do feel like I was maybe, I slept longer in Garfield than I thought.
And I woke up two years later and Glenn Powell's a movie star.
It's very like but he's almost so faceless to me that I remember.
Do you know who he is?
No, cards on the table. I have no idea.
Okay, Glenn Powell is here's what I know he's been in. He was in Top Gun Maverick. Is that right?
Okay.
This is news to me.
Okay, if he was not.
No, but I think he might
That's what I think made him a star probably because then he was also in that Sydney Sweeney romantic comedy
That came out a few months ago. Yeah. Yes. Okay. That's what I feel
I even though I've seen posters and trailers for that cannot conjures a face. I'm saying he's a faceless man
and then I what blew my mind in the
Faceless Man. And then what blew my mind in the trailers,
because there were two Glenn Powell trailers in Fall Guy.
Oh really?
He's in Twisters, the new Twister movie.
Do you think one of the Twisters
from the first movie is gonna do a cameo?
Oh, I hope so.
That cow, the cow that flew around.
They gotta have the cow in it.
Amazing.
And then this movie called Hitman,
which it comes up as directed by Richard Linklater,
screenplay by Glenn Powell and Richard Linklater.
Like we care that this guy's writing a movie,
this faceless man.
Wild, because to me he's like,
because there's too many Chris's doing superhero movies.
And some of them need to start doing
Animated voices. Yeah, some more voices.
But like eventually I just my brain ran out of room for them, you know their faces and then Glenn Powell's so I'm just I feel
Like he's the next one and I just my brain stopped. Yeah, like who was the equivalent of that when we were
There was just like a plain guy?
Yeah, plain guy that was in every movie.
Geez.
You know, like I always think about,
the guy that was in Deadwood,
I can't even remember, not Jaws Bro,
Oh, Timothy Olyphant?
Timothy Olyphant, I feel like he was in a ton of stuff
before Deadwood, that's really what I remember him from.
And then he was in, he was just in like a ton of movies.
Also, I feel like early on,
fuck, now I can't remember his name either.
Well, there are these like-
Bradley Cooper.
When Bradley Cooper, he used to be a guy that was like,
don't remember him at all.
Yeah, when I remember that joke that Chris Rock told
like in the year 2001 or whatever,
when Jude Law had started being in a bunch of movies,
like, who's Jude Law?
Where'd he come from?
Now he's in every movie.
And then Sean Penn came out 10 minutes later and like-
Oh, that's right, made fun of my friend.
Yeah, Jude Law is one of our most talented actors as a matter of fact. What has happened to Sean Penn?
Where did he he seems like he's scurried off into some cave somewhere?
Like he does he make movies still or is he just a full time? I feel like he's around
he's around oh he was in Once Upon a Time No he was in Licorice Pizza oh oh
was he yeah I haven't seen it. I feel like he might be one of a Time, no, he was in Licorice Pizza? Oh, was he?
I haven't seen it.
I've not seen it.
I feel like he might be one of the baddies.
You think he's a bad guy?
No, he might have done some bad things.
He definitely has that face.
I think he might be working in the shadows a bit,
being like, ehh.
But he's also like, remember like during the floods,
where was it, in Mississippi?
Yeah.
Where he was like in a canoe, like helping people?
Yeah, he's like.
He's erratic. He's got, you know what it is? He helping people. Yeah, he's like... He's erratic.
He's erratic.
You know what it is?
He's like a probably...
He's got resting bitch face.
He does.
And so you think he's a bad guy, but he's secretly a good guy.
Yeah, he does so well.
We're not doing any research.
Don't come for us.
We're not looking it up.
We don't want to look it up.
And we won't.
No.
Anyway, softball guy.
Yeah. Ryan Gosling.
I'm excited for this year's roster of Glen Powell.
How was it?
And you felt you didn't?
No, that one I did not fall asleep with.
It was good.
It was like, it felt like really kind of like, you know.
What's the premise?
So, what's his face?
Ryan Gosling is a stuntman.
Amazing. And a stunt goes wrong.
Uh-oh.
And then he gets pulled back in.
He stops stunting.
Right.
And then on these hoes.
And.
Oh, sick.
Dave.
And then he gets pulled back in for another job with Emily Blunt is the classic romantic
lead and she is now a film director and they've got a history.
So he gets pulled into work with her, but it's actually a crime afoot.
And he's actually been, he's got to gotta kinda like track down the people in the crime.
So he's gotta do real stunts.
He's gotta do real stunts.
He's gotta do real stunts
and he only done fake stunts.
Aw, damn, we got juice.
He does real stunts.
He's a stuntman.
Yeah.
It's like, and he comes, it's one,
I hate when they do this now,
when they get the stars of the movie
to give like a heartfelt thing,
thanks for coming to the cinema to see this.
This is our love letter to the stunt men.
That's the third movie that Gosling has played
a stunt man in.
Yeah, Drive.
Drive, he was a stunt motorcycle driver
in the place beyond the pine.
Right, that would be devastating to me.
Yeah, me too.
That's when I finally saw Bradley Cooper's face for the first time. Yeah
What was that devastating? Well, have you seen was a blue Valentine? Yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, what about half Nelson that does the dating full Nelson full Nelson
Yeah, I was on the prequel. Yeah
Anyway, so then a few days go by.
Then Tuesday night I had hockey.
I played hockey.
Okay.
And I was out.
How's your team doing this year?
Oh, we don't have a team.
How's the scrimmage?
It's the Canucks, right?
That's the team?
I wish.
Aw, they'll call.
They'll call, Dave.
But we lost the championship this year.
They always just make up with two teams at the very end
and we play a little five game championship.
That's fun.
I've won the last two years, I lost this year.
It was the last game and we,
so I stayed closing in the bar
and then I went home and sober.
Of course.
Arrive alive, Dave.
But the next day I was very tired
because I got home at like midnight.
I still had to do the dishes.
It was still kind of like,
I still had a little bit of adrenaline from hockey.
And then I, so I got like five hours of sleep.
And then that afternoon I took one of my daughters
to Brownies, Embers, it's called now.
Okay. And my other daughter was sat in the car reading and I also read and then fell asleep in the car.
That's fine.
Yeah.
I was fine, but it's just it's not who I am.
Well, it sounds like it's what you're becoming.
Yeah.
But it was oh, it was beyond fine. It felt really good. I reclined the seat.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
I had my arms above my head on the headrest.
You're in your Papa Bear, Bear and Scene Bear era.
That's right.
You know? Because I actually noticed you're wearing like the full sleep calf and the full nightgown now.
I do, yeah. I have a candle that I walk around with.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Is he the most iconic in that outfit?
I think it's a Sleepytime Bear maybe. I think it's Scrooge. Scrooge. Scrooge. Yeah. Is he the most iconic in that outfit? I think it's a sleepy time bear maybe.
I think it's Scrooge.
Scrooge.
Scrooge.
Yeah.
Scrooge is the ultimate sleep cap candle man.
So true.
Right?
Yeah.
Well, Abby works for a company called the Sleep Shirt.
Oh yeah, right.
And that's all they make is giant long pajama shirt.
And have they branch out into the candle holders.
They haven't done candle holder.
I used to have one of those with Mickey Mouse on it.
Did you?
I thought you didn't like Mickey Mouse.
I like Mickey Mouse.
It's like the movies.
Well, you could just borrow Graham's lighter
with the naked lady.
It was a naked Mickey Mouse.
This trunks disappeared.
Oh, yeah.
Hello. Yeah, that was like the candle Mouse. This trunks disappeared. Oh yeah. Hello.
Yeah, that was like the candle on a candle holders
that walk through the house.
Yeah.
I feel like people probably fall asleep
with that on there down there.
That shrew house.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Certainly.
You think Mickey Mouse is smooth down there?
Yeah, absolutely.
Mickey Mouse, I think regular mice are smooth.
Live mice are smooth.
No. The mice are smooth.
No, the mice that I have at my place
dragging around big balls.
That's how you know you can trace them.
That's how you find them.
Smart.
It is like wild.
Maybe it's different in like a small town or rural area,
but seeing a dog with balls still, it's jarring.
Yeah, you're like, what?
Yeah, when you see them like, oh yeah,
they naturally do have testicles.
Okay, you're gonna go away to Europe this summer.
I know, I'm gonna see.
Oh, you're gonna see some balls, Graham.
Ah, yes, I didn't even think about that.
Oh yeah, man.
Oh, sure.
Is that not a thing, like spaying and neutering?
Spaying, neutering, circumcision.
It's all off the table. Wow. Bob Barker wouldn't last two seconds out there. Yeah. Not right away.
He's not doing well here either. I... Oh, is he?
He's dead. Did Bob Barker die?
He died. Yeah.
He died. But he was quite old, right?
He was quite old. He was old.
And I saw in a documentary-
That's one I missed.
Oh, sorry.
I should let you know.
Barker?
Maybe I didn't miss it.
Are you sure he's dead?
Yeah, he's dead.
In a documentary that I watched, they talked about those Hollywood tour buses.
Oh, yeah.
And they said they always went by his place, and if he was outside, he'd go and greet everybody on the bus.
And like, he loved it, he loved it.
If he'd come out and wave, if they were driving by, yeah.
He was 99, died last year.
99.
99.
Close without going over.
I'm sure that people made that joke.
Like, why did I forget that?
You've got 18 tweets about him.
Yeah, I was listening to a podcast
and I heard a familiar voice and I was like,
oh, is that Christy Alley?
Oh wait, no, did she die?
Yeah.
Oh, is she dead?
I think so.
Oh shit.
Yeah, I really.
RIP Christy Alley.
Oh yeah, I feel like you're right.
Yeah, you're right.
There are too many.
Too many gone.
Yeah.
That's why actually they did have like,
did you watch the Oscars this year? Yeah
the like I did yeah the the list of people dying was like exceptionally long
yeah I wonder like what is the like if you were mostly famous for being on a
TV show when you were in a movie yeah you get on that Oscar reel or I think
there's like a big meeting about that.
Yeah, being like who's going on the list. Yeah, technically, Jaleel White was in a film,
but we all know him as Urkel. Yeah. And even though he's dying, Urkel will still live on
in our hearts forever. So true. So true. All right, so we shouldn't put him in either.
I guess not. He'll live forever.
But you know who's going in there?
Glenn Powell.
Glenn Powell, yeah.
He's been in enough movies.
Oh, for sure, yeah.
He's been in enough.
Honestly, he's going to be with us
for the rest of our lives.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's weird.
When I was a kid, somebody famous
that I would never have heard of would die
and my parents would talk about it.
They'd be like weeping.
Yeah, you know, like, you know. about it. Like weeping. Yeah. Yeah. Like, you know, like,
like, exactly. Like the exact perfect idea was Burr Lancaster where it's like,
I have no frame of reference for that. Yeah.
But that's starting to happen now. Yeah.
Yeah. And also like memoirs.
Yeah. Remember like, you know,
Burt Reynolds came out with a memoir like, who cares about that?
But Michael Richards is coming out.
I remember when Memoirs of a Geisha came out.
I was like, I never heard of this person.
Anyway, so I've been sleeping in public.
Yeah.
Love it.
Giving in that last second where you're like,
let's just do it, let's just fall asleep.
I did set a timer during the one in the car the other day.
I was like, I can't let my other daughter just walk around wondering where I am.
Also, I find the thing that will happen to be that'll wake me up if I do start falling asleep in public
is I'll drop my phone, my hand.
Oh, yeah.
Well, the thing I find wakes you up
if you fall asleep in public is a police officer.
Police officer.
Yeah.
Or the smell of a delicious baked good will wake me up.
Oh, a pie cooling on a window sill.
Oh my God.
Please.
You know, it's hard to do that in an apartment
because I don't really have any sills.
Nor do I, I'm sill-less.
Yeah.
So where do I cool a pie?
Yeah, yeah.
In the lobby?
Do I just put it in the lobby to cool?
Free pie.
Everyone ate my pie.
Yeah, that's weird.
I make pies and I never need to cool them.
Not on a sill.
Just I put them on the, honestly, the opposite of a cooling place.
I put them on the stove.
On the stove.
Yeah, let's say warm.
I love that.
You're making pies?
I guess I make pies early enough in the day that they're cool by dessert.
Now, do you feel like a pie is a summer treat or is it a year round?
Like, obviously on the holidays you're having.
Honestly, the pies happen.
Well, summer is good because there's fresh berries.
Yes.
But people freeze berries.
Please.
But yeah, for me, it's usually,
it just follows the day when I make five pie crusts.
Nice.
And then I don't make pie crusts for eight months.
And then. You freeze them, right?
I freeze them.
Yeah. There you go.
Sometimes I'll do a quiche even.
Oh yeah.
Shit.
Love that.
I forget about quiche.
I always do.
Nowadays motherfuckers wanna talk
like they got something to say
but when it comes out,
when they move the lips,
just a bunch of gibberish.
Motherfuckers act like they forgot about Keesh.
The rapping is so fast that I couldn't come up
with alternative lyrics.
Nowadays, motherfuckers wanna talk.
Wanna bake?
Yeah, wanna bake, yeah.
Anyway, what's going on with you?
Speaking of films, I got into completely randomly,
got an email from my wife that she got an email
that was from Cineplex that said like,
we are inviting you to a-
Oh, I got this email.
A free preview screening of Furiosa.
Ooh!
Yep, I went for it in a big way.
Now, are you a Mad Max head?
Love them.
Love them all.
I've seen them all.
Fury Road is my favorite.
Then I think Thunderdome, then the original,
and then Mad Max 2, if I had to rank.
But this Furioso, great.
Yeah?
Yeah, it's not as good as Fury Road.
Nothing can be as good as Fury Road.
That was, and like, they show clips in the movie
from Fury Road and you're like,
oh yeah, I forgot there was a cool guy that played guitar.
Yeah.
Oh, so cool.
What I forgot about that movie
was that it came out nine years ago.
That's fucked up.
I would have guessed 2019.
I would have guessed it was the year before the pandemic.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's such a cool, cool ass movie.
The guy who directed it, I love like, he does Mad Max movies,
he also has directed the Babe movies.
Pig in the City?
Yeah, and Regular.
And Regular Babe.
And Regular, and the new.
Original Babe.
Yeah, Original Babe, amazing.
Yeah, so he's got Scope, this George Miller.
And this movie.
Did he direct Furiosa?
Yes. Okay.
Yeah, and that is, this is a prequel to Fury Road
where we meet Furiosa and we find out where she comes from.
The only thing in the movie that I was like, huh,
is like Chris Hamm was worth it's in it
and he wears a cape and I'm like, I can't not see Thor.
I can't whatever he's going on and he's wearing kind of armor.
He looks like Thor, he's got long blonde hair still.
Yeah. So you're kind of like, this is like Thor, he's got long blonde hair still. Yeah.
So you're kind of like, this is a crossover.
But then he wears a fake nose.
That's the other thing.
He's got like a long nose in it.
Okay.
Yeah.
And I'm like.
Do you borrow it from Bradley Cooper?
Yes.
They shared one nose.
Who were the little big fake noses in cinema?
Oh, Steve Carell in that Foxcatcher one.
Oh yeah. Huge fake nose.
Didn't Nicole Kidman?
Yeah, in the hours.
Yes.
Isn't there somebody who did like a broken, somebody who had like a famous broken nose?
Oh, well, there was...
Snuffleufagus?
Snuffleufagus.
Snuffleufagus.
I mean, there's, uh, in Dirty Work, Chris Farley wears the nose that's been bitten off.
Yeah, and then also Clockwork Orange, he wears a very long nose.
Oh, sure, yeah.
Don't, I mean, if you're a squeamish, don't go to that as the example.
Yeah, I mean, Roxanne famously.
Yes, Roxanne!
But yeah, it's very funny to go to one of these things because there's no-
Did you ever see Roxanne?
Ah, no.
It was shot in Nelson.
In Nelson!
If you ever go to Nelson, you should watch it as a nice companion piece
to being in Nelson. I should.
Have you been to Nelson?
I've been to Nelson.
Yeah, did some camping up there or what?
Oh, one of my best friends lives there.
Oh shit.
Yeah.
Savannah?
Not since, we don't talk anymore.
We don't talk anymore.
Not since the SpongeBobics incident.
Yeah, really?
She thought you squealed.
She thought I squealed.
Yeah.
No, we weren't that close to that, and I.
No, I've heard Michelle, Michelle Hart,
who co-runs Improv Camp with me.
Oh, cool.
For teens who love improv.
Are you still, you do the Improv Camp?
Still do it.
I love this.
Yeah.
Here?
It's on Gambier Island.
Oh, nice.
It's sick.
Now, there was nothing like this
that existed when I was a youth. There was no Improv Camp. Yeah, and then I found out as an adult not only are there improv camps
There's magician camp. Yeah. Yeah. I found out from watching this movie American Pie that they have band camp. Yeah. Yeah
Wait until you see what they do at this mile
So
Improv camp. Yeah week long week? So, improv camp? Yeah.
Week long?
Week long.
Fun.
Sleepaway camp.
Yeah.
Yeah.
How many counselors are we looking at?
We, I usually have like 20 adults at least.
Okay.
Yeah, in total.
And you guys smoking dope over there behind the shed over there, utility shed?
I gotta say, it's strict, no drugs and alcohol policies.
Ah, shit, okay.
Now I know. All right. What?
We get high on life. And these are all like grades 8 to 12? Yeah 13 to 19
Okay. Wow. Yeah, it's sick. Did you go as a no? I didn't know about it. It did exist but many
Comedians in Vancouver went to improv camp actually like a lot of improvisers I believe it yeah yeah but I knew Alistair Cook was involved in this
he was he started it he started in the day yeah and now it's under the Canadian
Improv Games cool which is a teen improv organization and now me and
Michelle run it yeah if you knew Improv Camp was a thing,
cause you did improv.
I did improv.
I do the Canadian Improv Games.
How'd you do?
I don't know, we came in second.
Yoach. Nice.
Nice.
Yoach.
Yeah, I don't know, I probably would.
I don't know if I would.
I would need to know if someone else was going.
So fair.
Yeah, totally.
All right, back to Furiosa.
Here we go, back to Furiosa.
Okay, so what happens, have either of you been
to one of these free screenings?
I think many years ago.
I mean, I definitely used to win them on the radio a lot.
Yeah, do you remember which one you won?
Oh, tons.
I won the original Buffy the Vampire Slayer movie.
Nice. This movie called My Boyfriend's Back Which one do you want? Oh tons. I was the original Buffy the vampire slayer movie nice
This movie called my boyfriend's back about a girl
Zombie. Yes, that movie's so funny. It's very campy. Very funny. So many like
Hot shots part duh. Yes. Yeah
Classics all classics all my boyfriend's back is so funny because I remember there being a scene
where the mob, the like pitchfork mob
comes to his mom's house and he's like,
don't, whatever happens, don't tell them that I'm here.
And then as soon as she opens the door,
they're like, we're looking for Brian.
She's like, Brian, your friends are here.
Yeah.
I love that.
But what happens at these free screenings
is there's no, it is, it's like Mad Max, there's no law.
You don't have tickets, there's no assigned tickets,
you're just there in a line, hopefully.
Like how movies used to be.
Yeah, where you like, until it's full.
Yeah.
So this is, I find very much in Canada,
from my travels, Canadians and the English love lining up.
Sure. Holy shit, do they love a little order?
Like here in Vancouver, people line up for the bus,
you know, and just the airport,
oh God, nothing makes them harder than standing in a line.
I was in line at Safeway the other day
using the self-checkout and I was already checking out
and then a guy was standing too close to me
and I was like, what's this guy's deal?
And he was trying to get ahead of everyone else in line
and people were like,
the end of the line is here and he goes,
I only have one thing.
Oh!
We all only have one thing.
Yeah!
Yeah, it's lining up is big, but here's the crazy thing.
If there's no stanch big, but here's the crazy thing.
If there's no stanchions, the line goes insane. It becomes a black patch.
Oh, sure, there was no like-
Cause it's just who-
Velvet rope.
Yeah, there's no velvet rope.
And like, you could see the start of the line,
but then as you went back, it kind of wormed around
and then everybody's like, where's the end?
And it was on our end, absolute chaos.
We never figured out where the back of the line was.
We stuck with an older couple who regularly go to the movies.
She was talking about we've got Monkey Man.
She saw Monkey Man.
She had seen a special preview screening of something else.
She said, Monkey Man, you can skip it.
Really?
That's Patel, right?
I don't know. I think he's even directed it. Yeah, what she said, Monkey Man, you can skip it. Really? That's Patel, right? I don't know.
I think he's even directed it.
Yeah.
Yeah, what she said, you know,
she doesn't think it was that great.
I don't know who this lady is.
Yeah, lady says.
Yeah.
Well, I don't know what her-
Lady says.
Well.
But yeah, so managed to get in.
And a thing that they do at these free screenings as well,
they often give away a little bit of swag.
They give you a little song.
Yeah, it's a little fun thing.
And so like in the past,
I remember going to Jason Statham one
and getting a t-shirt of the movie that was kind of like,
I don't have it anymore, I gave it away,
but I didn't get into the movie, but I got a t-shirt.
I remember. What movie was that?
I was, I think maybe the first transporter.
Transporter one. Transporter one. And that. I was, I think maybe the first Transporter. Mm, Transporter One.
And ah, Transporter One.
And they knew there was gonna be a sequel.
That is kind of a ballsy thing.
What if you made an action movie
and you're like, Transporter One?
Yeah.
This is gonna be a series.
Oh, they're also doing a prequel, Transformers.
What a summer this is gonna be.
Oh, wow.
It's gonna be a big deal.
Wow.
But yeah, so the gift was in a little kind of envelope
and I was just so giddy.
I was like, what's it gonna be?
What's it gonna be?
Is it gonna be some stickers
or maybe some rub-on tattoos or something?
It was, as soon as I pulled it out of the package,
I was like, I don't know what this is.
And it was just like a fabric tube.
Oh.
And I was like, I don't understand what this is.
And then eventually we were like,
oh, Furiosa wears one around her face
because she's in the desert.
So she's like, it's like a thing you put over your head
and it's over your nose.
And it was like, yeah, okay, but we're not in a desert.
Does it say Furiosa on it?
The tiniest little tag says Furiosa.
Like you would never be able to, and it's not like
there's a pattern in the movie that's been replicated
on this thing, tube.
What color is it?
It's kind of like a gold and dark, dark green kind of thing.
So I think you have to go to Burning Man.
Oh, I do have to go to Burning Man.
Yeah, I think that's where you'll be able to use it.
Yeah, I guess I should just go to Burning Man.
I think so.
Isn't that, yeah. Is Mad Max, was Burning Man inspired by Mad Yeah, I guess I should just go to Burning Man. I think so. Yeah.
Is Mad Max, was Burning Man inspired by Mad Max?
I feel like there's a lot of crossover.
You gotta think, yeah.
Yeah, it's a funny, like,
I love that it's one of the only movies
that I think I've ever seen where they talk about the,
it's post-apocalyptic and you're looking at the globe
and then slowly the camera goes into Australia
of all the places.
Wow. Yeah.
It's the big Australian film.
Can't think of a bigger.
Hugh Jackman's Australia.
Yes. Oh yes.
Crocodile Dundee.
Crocodile Dundee.
Nice.
I used to work-
How could he miss that?
Yeah, Crocodile Dundee to I think I
Specifically thought was really funny as a youth sure there was a lot of good gags in it
Oh, I went I used to work with an Australian woman, and I was talking about
Some reason the topic of Baz Luhrmann. Oh, yeah, sure director came up, and I was like I don't like him
And she was so offended. Is he Australian? Yeah
Just also show you know cares a little Disney for day
Style over substance
Not a big Moulin Rouge fan. Haven't seen it.
Okay.
Yeah, I've seen it.
Yeah, I've seen it.
And also that music video, how iconic was that?
Oh, Boulogne.
Gucci, Gucci, La Bidon.
Who was it? It was Christina Aguilera.
Yeah.
Was Maya involved?
Maya.
Lil' Kim.
Lil' Kim was involved.
Pink.
Pink.
And then the OG, what's her name?
The OG. was involved. Pink and then the OG, what's her name?
The OG.
Man, it'll come to me later. Missy Elliott. Is Missy Elliott in it?
I'm Eve? Is Eve in it?
I don't know.
Maybe Eve's in it.
Okay, we got to look this up now because people are losing their minds, screaming at their speakers.
People are screaming. All the Boz Luhrmann heads are so pissed right now. Okay, we gotta look this up now, because people are losing their mind, screaming at their speakers.
Screaming! All the Boz Lerman heads are so pissed right now.
Are you a Boz fan?
Um, I wouldn't call myself a Boz fan. I would call myself a 14-year-old drama student when Moulin Rouge was out.
What am I looking up?
Moulin Rouge song?
Yeah, but it's coming up as the 1974 song.
Oh, the Voo Lay Voo Shoo Kay?
Lady Marmalade is the name of the song.
Lamy Marmalade.
It's not Voo Lay Voo Shoo Shoo Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf
Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf
Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf
Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf
Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf
Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf
Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf Shnaf So I would crush certainly we do well with if I may be the bold lady. What was your your ultimate?
Uh my
Crush crush
It is going to be and what is written in my journals is
Aragorn from Lord of the Rings. Oh, so specific character
Yeah, Viggo Mortensen, but not in any other role in history of violence
No, no, not in Hidalgo, which I saw,
because I loved Viggo Mortensen.
Easter Promises?
Nope.
Okay.
We got them all.
It was Aguilera, Maya, Lil Kim, and Pink.
Okay.
So there was no Missy Elliott?
Nope.
Okay.
Lil Kim was doing the rapping.
Okay.
There you go.
Big movie, big soundtrack.
Huge.
Big song. Big Vietnam. Big song.
But a little tiny,
isn't someone tiny in that movie?
Is there like a Tinkerbell character?
I think there might be, yeah.
I have no idea.
I think there is some,
there's definitely a magical element.
Yeah, certainly.
A fantastical element.
Who is this?
Is John Legg with Elmo a little?
Oh yeah, I think he's tooulouse-Poucahac.
Yeah, yeah.
The role he was born to play.
Well, how do you guys feel about moving on to some over herds?
Yeah, I can do it.
People say not to judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree.
Which is why here on Just the Zoo of Us, we judge them by so much more.
We rate animals out of 10 in the categories of effectiveness, ingenuity, and aesthetics
taking into consideration each animal's true strengths.
Like a pigeon's ability to tell a Monet from a Picasso, or a polar bear's ability to play
basketball.
Guest experts like biologists, ecologists, and more join us to share their unique insight
into the animal's world.
Listen with friends and family of all ages on MaximumFun.org or wherever you get podcasts.
I'm Dan McCoy.
I'm Stuart Wellington.
I'm Ilya Kalin.
And together we are The Flophouse,
a long running podcast on the Maximum Fun Network
where we watch a bad movie and then talk about it.
And because we're so long running,
maybe you haven't given us a chance.
I get it, but you don't actually have to know anything
about previous episodes to enjoy us,
and I promise you that if you find our voices irritating,
we grow endearing over time.
Perhaps you listened to one of our old episodes and decided that we were dumb and immature.
Well, we've been doing this a while now.
We have become smarter and more mature and generally nicer to Dan.
But we are only human, so no promises.
Find The Flophouse on MaximumFun.org or wherever you get podcasts.
Overheard. Overheard is a segment where if you hear it, we want to hear it.
It's only fair, right?
If you've heard it so good, don't give it to yourself.
Give it unto us.
And we always like to start with the guest, Allie.
Do you have an overheard?
I'm cheating because cause it was.
Don't tell your boyfriend.
It was said to me, but it was good.
I was walking down the street with my boyfriend.
Sorry to bring up again.
And yeah, we were holding hands.
What? Really?
Yeah, sorry.
That's hot.
I'm sorry. Is it PG?
Are you guys keeping PG here?
Because we were holding hands.
How often do you hold hands with your...
Look, I don't hold and tell.
Unless I really need to for my kiss and tell.
For my overheard.
So we're walking down Main Street holding hands.
And someone's...
A person holding a skateboard is walking up the other direction and like
just yells at me and he says, you have a beautiful boyfriend.
Oh, that's nice.
Isn't that great?
That is great.
That's the best cat call I've ever gotten.
Yeah, I got to see a picture of this boy.
I don't, I don't, I don't hold and tell.
You're not even going to tell us who it is. I don't hold and tell. Yeah. I don't I don't I don't hold until
When you hold hands the whole trip or is it no you gotta take breaks. Yeah
Yeah, gotta take what um, do you do like?
Clasping a whole hand your fingers intertwined. I I can go either way. Okay, like I'm crazy like that Whenever we do the intertwine, I feel like my knuckles gonna get broken somehow.
Yeah.
I mean, if you're both right-handed,
one of you is losing your dominant hand.
That's true.
That's true.
Wow.
What, how did your boyfriend react?
He was thrilled.
Was he on Cloud 9 all day?
Yeah, he was thrilled.
And I was like, thanks!
Does he get it a lot?
No, I mean, I don't know.
I don't know what happens when I'm not there.
Okay.
I know he doesn't tell me.
But imagine that's like a pretty,
like nice and good compliment to have.
That's just so great, yeah.
From a skateboarder too.
From a skateboarder.
They're normally like, blah, blah, blah.
And I love that-
Your boyfriend's gnarly is what they would say.
I love that it was directed at me too.
Uh-huh.
You know, it was just.
It's acknowledging that you guys are working as a unit.
Yeah, he was like, damn, look at that piece of ass
that you have with you.
So I thought that was.
Hold that hand and don't let go.
Yeah.
Dave, do you have an over-
Yeah, mine's an overseen.
Love this.
I was driving past a church
and this was about a month ago.
And I'll tell you, you'll figure out why.
Okay.
Because you know how they,
sometimes the church will have like a sign outside
that says, you know, whatever.
Get even with God.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Get even with God.
Yeah.
This one said, paying your taxes is one of the most
Christian things you can do.
Jesus, what?
Wow.
Huh, in what?
Someone's taking a stance.
Cause wasn't it just some king that came up with taxes?
Like it wasn't a church.
Okay, but.
I feel like it was a king that came up.
Churches are a bit of the original tax man, you know, with tithing, you know, giving a
little money to the...
I think it's more like, you know, hoarding your wealth than avoiding taxes is like, you
know, you're not, you're being selfish.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But pay your taxes for the good of everyone.
Yeah.
Yeah. And it feels that way when you pay your taxes. You're like, this feels good. Oh, good. for the good of everyone. Yeah. Yeah.
And it feels that way when you pay your taxes.
You're like, this feels good.
Oh, good.
This is good for everyone.
I hope they build a hospital out of this.
Yeah.
It is true.
The rest of the year, I'm like, oh, we need more money in public or whatever.
And then tax.
I'm like, oh, what else can I write off?
Not for me.
What else can I write off?
I can't spend any money on this.
I know it's been said before, but if you could specify where your taxes were going, that
would be just the, I want a little bit here.
Oh, I'd be, mine would be for private jets for the, for the fat cats.
For the ruling elite.
Of course.
That would be cool if you did know that you're like, oh, your, your money went to Air Force
One.
Yeah. Oh, One. Yeah.
Oh, fuck, yeah.
Are you kidding me?
Ah.
Or it went to a $900 toilet seat that went on some like...
Some spaceship.
Yeah, no, just like when they're like looking at,
you know, when the, I guess it's like the Pentagon hides
where a lot of the money goes.
I don't know.
It's the toilet seat.
Yeah, yeah. $800 toilet seat.
I want mine to go to like a really fancy buffet breakfast
where like, like Trudeau's like, kind of like, you know,
whining and dining people.
Just to get something.
69ing.
And no one, and of course he always does that, right?
And, but no one touches it.
Oh, right.
They just let it go cold.
That's where I want my money to go, my tax money.
Do you remember when the government was shut down
and Donald Trump was hosting all the college athletes
and he just got a bunch of McDonald's?
Yeah.
You gotta love that.
Yeah, he's a little scammed.
I'm sorry, he's a bad person, but nothing wrong with that.
No, nothing wrong with that.
Put whatever politician you like in the White House.
And if they did that, you'd be like, oh, that rule.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It is fun. It was fun.
Although, he ordered it quite ahead of when they would be there.
So it would have been cold.
Quite cold, yeah.
Well, he didn't figure out DoorDash yet.
He didn't know you could specify what time you wanted it delivered.
And he did it himself.
Yeah, yeah. On the app.
He just kept pressing like more, more, more, more, more, more.
And then it was just some guy at the gate like,
what's the buzzer number?
We've got 500 packages of cov-feeve.
Yeah.
Oh, I remember that.
Oh man.
This guy.
This guy.
May he rule again, I guess.
No, Graham, you're about to go away for the summer.
I am, yes.
And you wanna say that you don't think,
he'll never get elected.
Yeah, exactly, I wanna put it on record.
He'll never get reelected.
Show me, prove me wrong.
Prove me wrong, America, prove me wrong.
Right?
Once. My overheard, I was involved in this overheard Prove me wrong, America, prove me wrong. Right? For once.
My overheard, I was involved in this overheard and it was with the woman I was standing behind
in line at Furiosa.
She was asking me what movies I'd seen,
have you seen this, have you seen that?
And she said, have you seen Monkey Man?
And I was like, Monkey Man?
And she was like, yeah, have you seen Monkey Man?
I was like, Planet man. And she was like, yeah, have you seen monkey man? And I was like, planet of the apes.
And it was only when she pointed to the movie poster,
it was like, oh, monkey man.
Tweeter and the monkey man.
They were out of her cash.
Yeah.
That is, I haven't had that feeling in so long
of being like waiting for a movie and be like, are we gonna get good seats? Are we gonna be able to sit together? Yeah, that is, I haven't had that feeling in so long
of being like waiting for a movie and be like,
are we gonna get good seats?
Are we gonna be able to sit together?
Yeah, it's very nice.
Oh, it's also very funny to watch after you're all seated
to watch people come in and every person comes in like,
I don't know if there's any seats together.
Yeah.
Or when someone goes, is this taken?
Oh, it is?
Yeah.
Oh, shit, okay.
I don't think we're gonna be able to sit together.
And then 10 more people do the same Yeah. Oh, shit, okay. I don't think we're gonna be able to sit together there. And then 10 more people do the same thing.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, you know, come on.
If you showed up late, that's your own fault.
Yeah.
You wanna see Furiosa?
It's gonna be an exciting movie
that a lot of people line up for.
At Fall Guy, we were, we ordered tickets in advance
and chose our seats and there was no one around us.
And then two people showed up and sat right next to us.
What?
Yeah.
We were spreading out.
We were putting snacks in different.
There's no call for that.
Especially if you're, you know,
you're gonna sit down, you're a little bit tall.
This is classic.
Don't sit in front of them.
But they could have just moved down one seat.
Like why do you have to be rubbing elbows?
Yeah.
Fucking people, man.
I'm trying to stay awake here.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Now we also have over-heard sent in to us
from people all over the map.
You wanna send one in, send it into SPYMaximumFun.org
and this first one comes from Kelsey in San Francisco.
I live near a medical school.
One time I walked by two young women in scrubs,
just as one of them was saying very indignantly
to the other, I have too seen an uncircumcised penis.
I was at my brother's bris.
Mhmm.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Thought in progress.
Yeah, yeah.
I saw it for the first couple days.
Yeah.
Couldn't take my eyes off of it.
Yeah.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Um, have you guys been to a bris?
I feel like I know.
There's a good chance it'll go my whole life. I never get invited. I never get invited. I've been to plenty bris. I feel like I know. There's a good chance I'll go my whole life.
I never get invited.
I've been to plenty of bar mitzvahs.
I've been to three.
Three?
Yeah.
No, never.
Not me either.
No bar mitzvahs, no brises.
Maybe as an adult.
Oh, I'm an adult.
Yeah, maybe as an old man, maybe I'll get invited.
Oh, sure.
I mean, they do it in front of everybody, right?
Is that the basic thing?
It's like at the party. Really only seen.. Yeah, it's party at the brisk party
Because I think you have to put out a spread and drink. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they wear a little gown
Yeah, everybody has to wear a little
It's Seinfeld where that guy flinches. Oh
Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's right. Yeah, yeah.
That's the only brisk knowledge I have.
And then I know that
Nestea brisk.
Yeah, they have a big.
I'm gonna play it into a couple.
Is elliptin.
Yeah.
I know it's brisk, baby.
Oh man, yeah.
I could have some iced tea right now.
Oh sure.
But it's too sweet.
I need to go to a restaurant
where they put in a little bit of sugar.
Just a little bit. Yeah. Yeah, just a little bit this summer
I'm gonna track down
Some good ice. Yeah
anybody got any leads
There's a Vietnamese place by my house. Yeah, it does a green jasmine iced tea
Yeah, I was there by myself eating a little Vietnamese food as one does. Where was your boyfriend when all this was happening?
hadn't met him yet
This is last summer. Okay, and
So who knows what the fuck he was doing? Yeah, and I'm gonna go home. I'm getting mad about him
I'm gonna get mad. Where were you? Where the hell were you?
But I was there by myself. They put down a full jug shit of this jasmine green ice tea
It was delicious. It was a little sweet or just tea like I think was just
It might have been like a tiny bit sweet. Yeah, I need a little bit. Yeah, you know what I
People are gonna come after me for this. I just get the
iced tea lemonade mix from Santa Cruz organics, which is
It's not a really are an organic company. I think it's owned by smuckers
It's not a really or an organic company. I think it's owned by Smuckers.
Owned by Smuckers is the best. Owned by Smuckers. That's wild.
Huh. It's like a Smuckers traded on the...
And yeah, why are people coming after you for this?
I don't know, because people think I have basic bitch tastes.
Oh, no.
Everyone knows a better iced tea than me.
But I do like, I prefer my iced tea mixed with lemonade.
Yeah.
I call it an Arnold Palmer.
Ooh.
Yeah, you ever had one of those?
Yeah, yeah.
I had one, but I had it before I had a boyfriend.
So I didn't have it. Yeah, it was different.
Didn't taste as good. It was different then.
This next one comes from Tim.
In Vancouver, I was strolling around Van Dusen Gardens
with my wife when we saw three college-age
girls walking and chatting.
One of them was relaying facts about plants and flowers to the other two.
First girl said, wow, you know a lot about plants.
Fact girl, yeah, I'm a sentient like an Alexa that nobody cares about.
Wow.
Aw, come on, everybody cares.
That's a good, like, it's a little one-liner you've made about yourself.
Yeah.
Yeah.
She journals, you can tell.
That's good.
Also, she's just like saying something funny and not thinking, you know, like, this is
just for my friends. And look, now she's on a podcast.
Now she's on a national podcast.
Wow.
International.
International.
No, no. If you're listening in America, you will be arrested.
That's true, actually.
That's right.
We're just, yeah, your VPN is blocked or something.
Yeah.
Oh, that's one thing that I, oh, I cannot stand
when I go to like something like a networks page, NBC,
or who never is like, do you wanna go to the Canadian site?
I definitely do not wanna, I'm purposely here
because it's the American site.
No.
I wanna find out what I got to eat here.
Then you click on, you go to a page
for a specific show or whatever.
Yeah.
And then you go to the Canadian site and you say yes
and it sends you to the main page.
Like, well, this isn't.
This last one comes from Tim L.
A friend sent me this text of a conversation she had with
a seven-year-old daughter while she was on vacation in Spain.
Daughter, mom, we need to get my cousin a souvenir.
I saw a Hello Kitty kit that I think she'd like.
The friend said, that's nice, Hattie, but I think we should get her something that you
can only get in France or Spain.
The daughter said, oh, okay, let's get her something that you can only get in France or Spain the daughter said oh, okay
Let's get her a motorcycle and a pack of cigarettes
Let's get this kid on an improv stage. This kid is done with his trip
We love it
And I should say because we're gonna be recording a lot of episodes gonna I need written in overheards
I'm putting the plea out there to you people.
I need them, send them my way.
Even if you're like, this has been half cocked.
I need them, I need the whole.
And also if you've called in an overheard,
let's say from before April and it didn't get played,
maybe write it down and send it to Graham.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.
I think we need a, that's a public plea,
please, please, please.
I'll be your best friend.
Please remember that as being like a negotiation tactic.
That's beautiful.
Yeah, I'll be your best friend.
That's fun.
My mom would do that a lot.
Please do this, I'll be your best friend.
In addition to overheards that are written in,
of which we don't have very many of them.
That's right, and we need more.
If you would like to call us, our phone number is one,
we got plenty of those, don't worry about that. Don't need, don't need. If you to call us, our phone number is one. We got plenty of those, don't worry about that.
Don't need, don't need.
If you want to call us, our phone number is one,
844-779-7631, that's one.
Ugh, Spypod one, like these people have.
Hey, Dave Graham, impossible guest.
This is David in Philadelphia.
I was walking down the street
and my neighbor was walking with her kid
who had their dog
on a leash and the dog stopped to sniff a dead bird and my neighbor was like, get that
dog away from that bird, it's dead.
And the kid said, what's wrong with a dead bird?
And his mom said, well, you know, a dead bird is covered in bacteria and maybe the bacteria
will get on the dog and then the
dog will give the bacteria to you and the kid says, oh, and then I would be a bird.
The circle of life, you know, kids not wrong though.
Kids not wrong.
That's how I turned into a flamingo once.
Yeah, that's a good summer food.
I got better though.
Yeah.
I don't know why everyone's so worried about this avian flu.
You just turn into a bird for a little while.
Fly around.
Lay a bunch of eggs.
Now, when you picture turning into a bird, are you like dressed and then you turn into
a bird and all your clothes just fall on the ground?
Or is it like clothes included?
I think they come with me.
Okay.
I picture, I wake up one morning, things are different.
Yeah.
I've got feathers on my hand.
I do the movie thing where you look in your pants
to see what's there, corkscrew penis.
And you're like, is this puberty?
Yeah.
Have I finally gone through it?
Is this the change?
Am I going through duck puberty?
Next phone call.
Hi, Dave and Graham and possible guests.
My name is Leslie and I live in Edwardsville, Illinois.
I was just at Walgreens on Mother's Day.
It's like five o'clock on Mother's Day evening.
So like desperate people trying to find things
for their moms.
And I was in the candy aisle.
These two kind of hip teens were next to me.
And one of them said,
I don't even know what she likes.
And the other one said,
I don't know, like chocolate, she, whatever.
She'll like anything. And the other one said, I don't know, like chocolate, she whatever she'll like anything. And the first one said, Well, I know she does like sunflower seeds. So that
poor mom is getting some sunflower seeds for Mother's Day.
Now I listen to this after I talked on the podcast about how I gave my mother a big bag
of sunflower seeds for Mother's Day.
But she really wanted them.
She-
Bits?
No, the candy coated ones that are hard to find.
She's been looking around
and I got her like a two pound bag of them.
So I just played that because I was like,
I feel dumb now.
Mothers don't want?
No, mothers do.
Mothers do.
I think they probably-
I think also her friend was right. She was stoked.
You get your mom anything?
She's just glad that you're acknowledging her
on her special day.
Thinking about her.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm thinking about her.
I also made macaroni art for her.
Of course.
That would be the best if you just kept,
and it just got more, you know, well done.
Oh yeah.
You know, over the years.
Never stop.
And you never got like the, you done. And more, you know, over the years. Never stop. And you never got like the,
you never understood the parental sort of like,
that's great, dear.
You never understood that voice.
And you're like, oh, she thinks it's great.
Yeah, I just, yeah.
I gotta do kinda, they came up with a new shape of pasta.
Are they still, is that still an ongoing thing with kids?
The macaroni?
I know beans.
I've seen beans glued to construction paper, but I
Don't know. I don't know if the macaroni art is still with sparkles. Yeah, I don't know if I've gotten any macaroni art, but
Not too late. Not too late. Do you think it's cuz you keep falling asleep?
Yeah, this week. Yeah, and they're like, I don't know. That's clearly got, he's got that pasta sluggishness.
Yeah, no, I, have you guys tried a ready atore?
No.
What's this?
It's a noodle I bought the other day.
Okay.
Like Abby wanted to make pesto something.
So on the shopping list, she just put a fun noodle.
Oh, nice.
That's fun.
That's fun.
And I found a radiator.
I think it's just shaped like a radiator.
Oh.
Oh, like a little waffle on it?
Can you even imagine it?
I'm picturing it going like whoop, whoop, whoop.
Like a chex.
Let me look.
I see it look like a mountains and valleys kind of.
Radiatorre.
Here we come. Here we go.
Yeah, we'll get you a bigger one. We'll get you a bigger one over here.
Get a big, get a big. And we're now. Okay, now it's cut off now.
Uh oh. Really screwed this. Okay.
Okay. Oh yeah, okay.
Sure.
Kind of looks a little like a little corkscrewy.
Yeah.
Oh yeah, they do look like little radiators.
Yeah.
It's got a good mouth feel.
Yeah, it's good.
Yeah.
Would you, would you ragiattoria again?
Yeah, it really like, you know,
it can carry a sauce pretty well.
Sure.
It would be good in like a pasta salad as well
Yeah, it's pretty good so good
Pastas good. Hey guys. Oh man. How's the gluten-free stuff good?
Do you know what I found a couple of passes in our bed and I'm gonna
Dip a toe into the Trader Joe's world. Yeah
When you gonna do that? You gonna make it a trip?
I'm not making the trip.
Sally and her sister are gonna go.
Hell yeah.
When's that happening?
Saturday.
Oh yeah.
You wanna put anything on my order?
I was thinking of going in the next couple weeks.
Oh yeah.
But yeah, they do, I always bring Alicia back
some of their wooden free.
Yeah, they have some fun looking pasts.
Heck yeah.
You wanna try it?
I was watching that episode with the Fusilli Jerry
and I laughed so hard at the joke where Kraver tells George
I'm making one of you out of ravioli.
I couldn't stop laughing at that joke.
Now can we do the Seinfeld game with that one?
Yes.
Okay.
You know the Seinfeld game?
It's a game, Graham and I play where he
tells me one of the plots in the show or vice versa and I try to
reconstruct the other three characters plot. Okay! I was actually thinking about it.
I was trying to think of other shows it would work with and I think maybe
Sex and the City it would work with. Yep. It's true. I just don't know it very well.
Yeah I don't know it as well. Okay, so what is the,
what is the plot you wanna give me?
I'll give you,
I just watched it.
Do you watch a lot of Seinfeld?
Do you're familiar?
I have, yeah, I've seen.
Well, just sit back and get ready to watch.
I can't wait.
I'm a master at work.
Dave's gonna make it.
Okay, I'm gonna make sure that I have all the...
Well, I'll tell you one of the plots right away.
Amazing.
So I'll just give you, I can give you Kramer's?
Is that one of you?
No, don't take it, I know Kramer's.
You know Kramer's.
Yeah.
But then I know what I wanna give you the...
Yeah, okay, give me George or whatever.
Okay, let me just...
Kramer's I know.
Kramer gets...
All of them.
Well, Kramer gets the wrong license plate, I believe.
In the rigatoni episode?
Fusilli Jerry.
Fusilli Jerry, sorry, I would see that.
Or maybe I have it.
Kramer has started making pasta sculptures of his friends.
Okay, yeah.
And he makes a fusilli Jerry.
And he chose fusilli because you're silly.
He's going to make a Ravioli George.
I don't know if I can do this episode.
I just know that Kramer gets the ass man.
Okay.
So he gets the ass man license plate.
License plate.
And you know the full scope of that?
Well, okay.
He gets the ass man license plate by accident and he's trying to get the ass man license
plate.
And he's trying to get the ass man license plate.
And he's trying to get the ass man license plate.
And he's trying to get the ass man license plate.
And he's trying to get the ass man license plate.
And he's trying to get the ass man license plate.
And he's trying to get the ass man license plate.
And he's trying to get the ass man license plate.
And he's trying to get the ass man license plate.
And he's trying to get the ass man license plate.
And he's trying to get the ass man license plate. And he's trying to get the ass man license plate. And he's trying to get the ass man license plate. And he's trying to get the ass man license plate. And he's trying to get the ass man license plate. Uh-huh. And you know the full scope of that?
Well, okay, he gets the ass man license plate by accident
and he's trying to track down who it's for
and is it like a guy who has a lot of sex?
Is it a proctologist?
And then he's in the proctologist office
and Jerry or someone says, oh yeah, a proctologist office and Jerry or someone says,
oh yeah, a proctologist is just like,
the whole day they're just hearing people say,
one in a million chance.
Because it's all stuff going up people's butts.
And then-
Kramer also says, if you're at a party
and there's a proctologist there,
plant yourself a like
because you're gonna hear some amazing stories.
And then, so he's stuck with this life split
and he wants to get rid of it?
Yeah, he's trying to give it back, but in the meantime.
He's using it and people are honking at him.
Yeah, and everybody's yelling ass man at him.
He's loving it.
Yeah, and Cosmo Kramer, the ass man.
And at one point he parks in a hospital stall
and the cop's gonna write him a ticket
and he just points at ass man and then the guy's like,
all right, you're gonna be a doctor.
And then he eventually finds the rightful owner
and gives them back to him.
But then also, is it Frank ends up sitting
on the fusilli jerry?
Frank gets this fusilli jerry up in the butt.
So also part of that plot line,
George's mother is getting eye surgery.
Oh, and she's not allowed to cry.
She's not allowed to cry.
And they also, he's driving.
Oh, does he stop short?
He stops short.
He takes-
Kramer stops short.
Kramer stops short.
So he stops to prevent her from flying into the dashboard.
Reaches over, but that's Frank's move.
Oh, so is this the one with the move?
Yes.
Oh, okay.
You're cracking this.
So everyone's got a move.
A move is like a, I guess, oral sex move?
Yep.
That's what, that was the discussion I had.
I assume this is an oral sex.
And are they putting fingers in butts?
Possibly.
There's something about a knuckle.
There's a knuckle and then a swirl. That's why I think again. So, so Putty has been talking to Jerry and
this is the first appearance of Putty. Oh, really? This is the first time he's on the
scene. So, Putty's dating Elaine and she comes and tells Jerry, he used your move. And so
Jerry has been, it's my move. I don't want him using my move on other women. Well, why should I tell him your move then?
Yeah.
And then George is on the outside of all this.
He's trying to get a move and he's trying to learn the move.
Yeah.
Is he dating anyone of note?
He is, I don't, no, I don't think so.
I think the bulk of that storyline
is that he wants to learn the move.
And he does, And she complains.
Is that when she's like, what are you doing down there?
And he goes, pleasuring you.
Is that that?
Well, he does it.
And then I think it's a success.
But there's a knuckle involved at one point
she complains about.
But yeah, he-
Has Elaine got anything else going on in her life?
Not in this episode.
She wants him to continue to do the move.
But when he goes to putty to say stop doing the move,
putty's response is, I'm not going to fix your car anymore for discount price.
Because and so then Jerry says to him like, Okay, you can do it out of town.
It's like a comedy thing. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. You can't do the joke. Yeah.
And then of course, Pramor does find the ass man. He can't do the joke. Yeah. And then, of course,
Pramor does find the ass man as a proctologist.
And then why does he want to get rid of those plates?
Just because they're not his and he just sees ass man on a boat.
Oh, yeah. Picture in his.
All right. In the doctor's office. Right.
Anyway, listeners, if you want to support show, at maximumfun.org slash join.
We have three or four full bonus episodes
of us just doing this.
That's amazing.
Yeah, and you know what?
It's a lot of fun, and I recommend it for a long drive.
It's fun, it's fun.
It's the game, if you know the show.
All right, here's your final phone call.
Here we go.
Oh, they can also do it with this show.
They could be like,
what was the one where Dave kept falling asleep? Well, that was also Graham Saw Furiosa.
Yeah.
Oh, please.
Hi, Dave and Graham.
This is Harry in Los Angeles,
just in a full elevator in my office.
And the conversation that overheard along the lines of,
you know what's really popular in New York
that's starting to pop up in LA?
Bagels.
Well, now I'm gonna go blow my brains out.
They spent so long getting rid of carbs and bread in LA
that they're just rediscovering bagels.
Yeah, and there's in there like, I don't know if it's a myth,
but people that bring water from New York.
They do bring water from New York.
Oh yeah.
The water's so special there.
Special thing.
Yeah, you know what?
I've never had a bagel in LA.
I wish them the best.
I hope that they all.
I feel like it's probably like bagels in Vancouver though,
which are not very good. Yeah. No.
Agreed.
Yeah, they're okay ones, right?
They're okay bagels.
But you wanna go to Montreal.
Yeah, we're not in the bagel city.
Yeah.
Oh, those Montreal bagels.
Boo, please.
Boy, oh boy.
Please.
Have you ever been best the same theater at like midnight
and they're like cooling them on a windowsill? No. Like they come fresh out of the oven Have you ever been best the same theater at like midnight
and they're cooling them on a windowsill?
No.
Like they come fresh out of the oven
and then they're, or out of the fire.
Yeah.
And they're cooling them on the street.
I love that.
And you can just go up and get a handful.
Get a handful of fresh bagels.
Yeah.
Fuck.
Ugh.
Dare to dream.
We gotta get to Montreal.
We gotta do it.
This is the year just for last, it's gonna be this. Yeah. We gotta do it. This is the year Just for Laughs is gonna win this.
Yeah, this is the year.
This is gonna be a big year for JFL.
This is the first year they allowed characters
in the showcase at Just for Laughs Northwest.
And?
So I did characters in the showcase.
What did you do?
Amazing characters.
Yeah.
A teen who doesn't want to
Admit she wants my Barbies
Yeah, I did it go from love Island nice nice and then I did a
I'm like a white ally who really cares. It's pronounced Ali
And just relax was like I think we're done. I think we're gonna have enough.
We're like, no, we're good.
Yeah.
Yeah, thanks so much though.
So out of business, we were going out of business.
Everything must go.
We saw that and we said,
I think comedy's done for us actually.
You know what I wanna buy?
Victor.
You wanna buy a Victor?
Yeah.
We should let them know they can use the gas.
Yeah, yeah.
Exactly.
Do they ever, was there ever like a red Victor? We should let them know they can use the gas. Yeah, yeah. Exactly.
Do they ever, was there ever like a Red Victor?
Yep.
I want Red Victor.
Red Victor.
Victor.
I got a green Victor and Red Victor over in shoulder.
What is Red Victor?
It tells you to smoke DeMorey cigarettes.
That's what I remember from my youth.
Yeah.
No, green Victor's like, it's over.
And Red Victor's like, it's just begun, baby.
Oh.
Ally, thank you so much for being our guest.
Graham, Dave, thanks so much for having me.
I wish you nothing but success with the improv camp,
with your herbs, with your surfing.
With your surfing and your continued bike riding
safely in the city.
Thank you.
And you have a show once a month.
This is true, the last Friday of the month at Little Mountain Gallery.
Tell us what it is.
It's a branch of comedy show.
It's me and my best friend, Carrie.
Who has also been on the show.
She's also been on the show.
Friend of the pod.
Friend of the pod.
Yeah.
Yeah, we do improv, we do sketch.
And it's, you know, look, if you wanna see two people
who are best friends, who live together through the pandemic,
if you want to see them devolve on stage,
come on down.
That sounds fun.
It is fun.
And you know what?
The little mountain gallery where it happens.
Yes.
110 Water Street.
110 Water Street.
They got air conditioning in there.
They do.
Yeah, so if it's a little too warm for you today,
or the day that this comes out,
or just in the month in general.
Exactly.
Yeah.
And see Graham there every Thursday.
Every Thursday?
Yeah!
Up in the raccoon room, the tiny room upstairs.
I love it.
And also send Graham your over-herds.
Please, I mean, we are, I'm in quite a state,
so you gotta help, you gotta.
Just I'm looking at all these radiatory Google images,
and they're mostly pasta, but some of them
are like Italian car websites showing you
how to replace your radiator in your...
Replace them a radiatory.
I guess in your Fiat.
I love it.
Amazing.
Thank you, everybody out there, for listening to the pod.
Like I say, we need those overheard.
So keep typing them out and sending them our way.
Yeah, type it.
Come on back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself. Maximum Fun, a worker-owned network of artist-owned shows, supported directly by you.