Stop Podcasting Yourself - Episode 862 - Chris James

Episode Date: September 24, 2024

Comedian Chris James returns to talk swingers clubs, little free libraries, and a haunted house documentary.

Hi, he's Dave Schumke. And he's Graham Clark. And together we host Stop Podcasting Yourself. Woo! Hello everybody and welcome to episode number 862 of Stop Podcasting Yourself. My name's Graham Clark and with me as always is a man who will take your heart if only you make it real or just forget about it, Mr. Dave Schumpka. Is that a Santana lyric?

It is. It's a Santana-Rob Thomas crossover hit. Does Santana do the lyrics or does he get Rob Thomas? That's where Rob Thomas comes in and really proves his worth when he comes on the lyrics Santana's only writes songs But ladies shoes that's his big side gig. Yeah. Well, he does make ladies shoes. Is that right? Is that what you're referencing? Yes, that is what I'm referencing that Santana has his own line of women shoes Santana Carlos Santana. I guess he just gets a different lead singer for every song. Yeah.

Or I guess like there he's in the Woodstock movie and he just plays guitar. There's no lyrics. No one does Oye Como Va? I think maybe that came later. But yeah, maybe he wrote that. I don't know. Look. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

You don't think? Look. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa, you know, I think look Our guest today on the podcast a returning guest to the podcast He is a podcast host himself of the guys podcast and the final season of the not even a show show It's Chris James. Hi Chris. Hello guys. I've matured quite a bit since last I spoke with you. I have a child now. Yeah, and you're also chewing on a piece of hay. Your voice is really deep too. Oh, really? See, I'm gonna go to my regular voice

and they're gonna be like, I wish he could have kept up that voice. It's far less grating. We got very little of it before you changed. Yeah, I can't hold it. I'm like high-pitch Eric from the Howard Stern show. I can only, I don't think people are gonna remember that reference.

I was like, oh man, this is deep. Very, very excited though. Yeah, a lot of things have changed in my life and excited to be back on. I think it's been a while since I have been. It has been a while, yeah. Well, should we get to know us? Yeah, let's.

Now, how long has it been? I'm going to look it up. Oh, it's not been I was doing my show. So it's it's within six years. Within the last six years, it was 20 January 2018. Six years. That's six and a half. Holy shit. It was January 2018. So six years, that's so. Six and a half. Six years, holy shit. It would have been, wow, so basically I came on when I was starting the channel, right, and still near the beginning of doing it,

and yeah, I've gone through a lot, and yeah, I'm pretty much done with that shit now. And Chris is here today, he's gone through a lot, we're interested in his story, and we'll get right to it. Oh, that's great. That's cool when the host is interested in you, you know? Yeah, I'm not totally detached to just doing host stuff. Yeah, so I'm, you guys want to get to know him?

Chris before, yeah, we'll get to know you, but I don't want to, I'm not interested in this, your pre-packaged story of- I got a bunch of pre-packaged stories. I could go to pre-packaged story two, if you'd like. Yeah, yeah, yeah, let's see what you got on number two. I notice over your shoulder, you do have the pinnacle of like a teenager's bedroom. The basketball hoop that you, that's for, I guess, like a Nerf basketball. Yeah, the basketball hoop that you, that's, I guess, like a Nerf basketball.

Yeah, the basketball hoop is, I stream and I do record podcasts in here as well. So the sort of idea was that I was going to, you know, hit shots. I was going to take shots on stream and people could sort of, they could decide, oh, is he going to hit this shot? And the only time I ever did it was on the blocked party. I heard this. I heard this like a couple of months ago. So I did it, and I did not realize

that they do video episodes. And so it turns out that you can see me taking a shot on there if you watch that episode. But yeah, it didn't pan out the way I sort of envisioned it. Now it sort of, yeah, I do kind of just look like a, like a teenager, but it's kind of cool in a way though. It's kind of like retro. Um, yeah. And it's kind of, you have a dart board somewhere in there. Yeah. It feels like that could be, it could be awesome for your man cave. Yeah. See, I'm not going for man cave. So yeah, that is a little bit basketball hoop says otherwise is man cave ish definitely you can see that I have pretty nice lighting though

that's you know that's kind of floor lighting you'd have in a man cave though I have Nick Nick Nemirov's album up there so why do you guys say something negative about that we won't I didn't say anything negative at all. I said, I was like, hey, check out that basketball hoop. Tell me about it, my man. Yeah, I mean, yeah, yeah. I mean, listen, I had never really thought of it in an embarrassing way before, but it's, I'm a little embarrassed now to have the basketball hoop.

Well, here's the deal is, I was asking because people put out like little free stuff outside their house. And there was one in my neighborhood and my wife, Abby brought it home. And so now we are owners of a. That is a good thing to find on the street because it's something that people would definitely be throwing away and not need. But then it's like something you kind of say, that's cool. You know, I

would, I can put that up on the door. I bought mine, but at a secondhand store for very cheap. That's basically for like finding it on the street. That's as close as you can get. Yeah. The only thing I've ever found on the street and put up, it was a outside, it was a yuck yucks. It was a wooden advertisement for Yakov Shmurnov's show, a dating show at Yuck Yucks that I randomly found in the downtown Eastside one time. Wow. What a story that sign must have been.

All the things that sign is seen. Oh my god. What a story. Yakov Shmurnov's dating show. What the hell? Yeah, it was a dating comedy show. It was like a singles night, kind of. I guess you're meant to go kind of mix with other people.

And then at the same time, Yakov Shmurnov is doing his jokes and everything. That's, the elevator pitch is brilliant. Yeah. Dave, have you sunk any three pointers on that bad boy? No, I didn't. I was opposed. She always brings home stuff, and I'm like, we don't need stilts.

You guys found stilts? Yeah, wait a second. They were busted stilts. One of them, so they had like, there were these kind of like aluminum tubes that had like footholds on them. But one of the tubes didn't, like one of them had a rubber base and the other one didn't. So it just kept sinking into the grass Yeah, it's oftentimes you find something for free and you're like why the heck would someone throw this away and then you start using it

I got that's why okay, you know, it doesn't work So for people who haven't heard your show before Tell us about the not even a show and then I want to know about the guys podcast. But you told me that you're wrapping up the Not Even a Show. That's coming to an end. It's like a politics-based show, just in the sense, I mean, it is politics. I'm sort of messing with political people and radio hosts who are talking about political stuff and that's kind of why I'm ending it.

I enjoy doing it from a creative standpoint, but it's a variety YouTube channel where I do all kinds of ridiculous stuff. I trick people into like, I have a whole fake network where I trick guests into coming on. Like I've had like Roger Stone come on for an interview before and like, yeah, Paul Manafort, like really weird old, just people who don't do proper research. I have a pretty good facade of a website and a thing where you'd have to subscribe to see the content and it tricks quite a few people. Then yeah, the idea is you just, I do like sketches.

I do it with other comedians as well. This season I'm having I have, I'm having on, like, John Gabras is coming on, Joe Para is coming on, Dan LaCotta, Brace Belden from True and On. So I'll get other people to come on and sort of- Yakov Shmurnov. Yakov Shmurnov and I are going to do anti-American. I mean, hey, he's very, he's very anti-American. So the idea, it's like basically we're writing- You should do a singles night. We're writing comedy sketches with, and then somebody is there, like a really serious political

person who doesn't know there's a sketch going on. That's a big element of it. And then I just have kind of characters and yeah, it's a variety show, basically. Well, where, because like, I know you from standup days. And when did you decide I'm going to run this whole, this whole show, this whole circus? This. Well, that was when I, when it was in

2018 or 17 or so when I last came on the podcast. I was right around that time. And I'm sure if you went back and listened to, I'm sure I discussed it there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So long ago about, yeah, I just, I hate touring and I hate going around to little shitty towns and not,

I just, that sounds rude. I just hate not having a place to live. That's like my home. You know, I hate. People in shitty towns are really offended. Why are you like coming to a shitty town? I'm, yeah, people are like, holy shit. We suck.

My shitty town is actually awesome. Well, but I am also, I'm trying to buy a house right now for my family. So I'm looking at a lot of shitty towns, you know, because I'm in British Columbia here where a person like me, if I want to buy a house, it's going to be at a fairly shitty town, you know. Now what's the size of a town that's the minimum size? 10,000 people?

No, no minimum at all. It's not even based on that. My would, my partner grew up in a small town and I like the idea of it. I worked- Partner John Mellencamp. Yeah, I don't even know. I guess my girlfriend just feels weird saying girlfriend. Ariel, her name is Ariel.

So I'll just refer to her. You say your partner. Henceforth as Ariel. Yeah, but I know when you say partner, there is like, it does have a feeling like it is a same sex thing often. It's a thing that's often used. I didn't say John Mellencamp because of a same sex thing.

I said it because he was born in a small town. Famously. Okay, yeah. What a weird, if I was being like, oh yeah, this guy's gay, he loves John Mellencamp. I did think it was a bit odd from Dave. I was like, I don't really know Dave to traffic in that kind of rhetoric. No, I was doing a song lyric, bozo. Yeah, that makes sense.

We're ending our nice podcast and we're starting a brand new edgy, edgy cast. What episode did you say it is? This is the end of the nice one and then the beginning of the first one. Yeah, this is the end of season one. What number is the, like you've done eight, just after 800 and something, you decided. 862. And you decided now is the time for,

Yeah. To switch it up. Yeah. Because we want to help you buy a house. And so we. 862 is the number. It's like, if you, if you think about it, it just makes the most sense.

Is there anybody who, like that's obviously a very high number, but there are like, there's podcasts that have crazy high numbers, I guess. Like- Podcasts that do it every day. Yeah, so they'll have thousands of episodes. I wanted, cause I was gonna say, I wonder where you guys rank

as far as the most episodes ever, you know. Weekly we'd probably be up there, but yeah, like, even a show does it twice a week, they would have to done half the time so that's Graham. You should teach math. Well. I don't I know how to do it I don't necessarily know how to teach it. It's kind of something you're born with you know how to do it Yeah, yeah, give me two single numbers. I'll add them up. I'll give you the sub four and five nine whoa yeah Exactly, and I didn't even have time to use a calculator. Nine. Yes. Good try. Good try. So if you're if you move to a small town, what does a small town need for you to be there? Like does it need to have a subway? Internet? Does it need to have an A&W? It has to have internet. It has to have genuinely because I make my living online and I record a

podcast with someone who lives in Ohio. So I have to have reliable internet. So yeah, certain small towns don't have reliable internet and that's a problem. But yeah, other than that, I don't know, man. I don't really need a whole lot in my life. I really, I really enjoy spending time with my son. I just, I just like hanging out with him. I don't really need to, you know, so, I mean, it has to have stuff for him. You know, there has to be schools, you know, there has to be stuff. It has to be a school, you know. So you're not moving to a commune or anything like that? We're not moving to a small hamlet. We are going to move somewhere that has a school

both elementary and high. Okay, that does rule some places out. Oh, really? Yeah, the stupider towns. Well, my wife's parents live on Gabriella Island and they have an elementary school, but then they bus the kids to Nanaimo. Oh, I see. Yeah.

For high school. We are looking at, you know, at places around Nanaimo in that sort of area, definitely. We're actually going out, we're going out this, I'm going to the island this weekend to go look at places and go sort of check out a couple of cities. I'm not going to say where, you know, because I don't, because then a lot of people think I think that's shitty and I didn't really think that. Oh, sure. Oh yeah, yeah.

Fair enough. Yeah. You don't want to come into town and already the, uh, the town has set up a posse. Like you want to drive you out of town. They've all heard the episode and they're not happy. But there are like big shit, there are shitty cities. Like it's not a size thing. I did. So, they're not happy. But there are like big shit, there are shitty cities. Like it's not a size thing.

I was completely like, I think I really don't like living in Vancouver anymore. I don't know how much you guys discussed this, but. How much you hate Vancouver? No, how much you guys do or if you do, or if you know how just difficult it's become living here. It's incredibly difficult to live here. And so unless you're a rich person, it really is kind of, it's hard to save money

and it's, you know, when you're starting a family or whatever. So I'm super eager to go really anywhere else. And I think there's so many beautiful, like the island has incredible places, you know? So I don't really think they're shitty at all. Well, I don't know. You're backtracking on earlier statements. So we don't know who to believe. Yeah, this is tough. I hope they keep listening to the episode. You know what I mean? The posse? Well, they don't know where they're from yet. They haven't banded together yet.

Yeah, yeah, that's true. That's true. They could use- We're just a shitty posse. We go from shitty town to town. In the Nanaimo area, they know that. And Nanaimo was like, surely he's not talking about us. We're cool. Other towns around us suck. And you, as you said, you have a brand new baby. I do have a brand new baby. How brand new?

Five months, almost five and a half months old now. That's pretty fresh. That's a fresh baby. Although he's, I love mentioning this. This is like the thing that I just won't shut up about is he's just absolutely gigantic. He's just absolutely huge. He is genuinely the size of a one-year-old. He is the same height and weight as an average one-year-old.

So it's like a problem. People think he's much older than he is, you know. It's a problem. It's a problem. It becomes a problem when they're like, they expect that he can stand up on his own or something, you know, so you gotta be careful of stuff like that. If your kid is like super, super huge, you know. I do forget like all the like milestones of,

oh, they can hold their head up or they can sit up on their own or like you can walk away and not worry about them rolling off the change table. Oh yeah, not, he's just rolling now. So that's just becoming an issue, you know? You think he'd be able to do a slam dunk on that basketball hoop with his advanced size?

How soon can we see a slam dunk? We, I mean, hey, you're joking around, but we definitely hope that he's a hooper. We're going to push him hard into hoops. And I wanted to go tackle football, but it's like all this stuff for the documentaries now. I really, we really think he's going to be a really, really huge zone all seriousness. I'm six foot two and Ariel's like five foot 11.

And then her brother's six six and her other brother's six four and her dad's like, so, so it really does feel like he's, he's going to be a real huge giant of a guy. I would love if you like, you know, I got that basketball hoop, you know, for free on the side of the road. I wish someone had one of those like, like tackling dummies. Football like what's the thing you push?

Yeah, I don't know what it's called, but I put your shoulder in it and y'all. Yeah. And the coach stands on it and yells at you. He yells at you. Did you do you yells at you. He yells slurs at you. Do you hoop at all? I played basketball when I was younger, not in any super serious way, but I played basketball. I was decent at it, but I played other sports

that I was more into. But yeah, it's just, we just hope that he's, I just hope that he's extremely big. I hope he's just a very, very, very big guy. I hope he's like, it's like a photograph of the family, you know, and it's like, what the hell? Like you look at it, what the hell is that all about? That's the kind of size we're looking for. I do love it when there's like a baby who is, you know, the, you know, too big for their age and they're with, you they're like they start pushing

around other baby they don't know their own strength yeah yeah they don't it's true if because I guess eventually they are spending time with the kids their age especially once they go to like preschool so you know so then they're gonna be around a bunch of run like everyone to him is just a little run you know so he's you know he could just Are you hoping that he turns into a bully, that kind of thing? Like he's right away, he's pushing kids around. Are you hoping his first words are puny human? I'm just thinking that maybe Ariel will listen to this and I don't even, as she is,

would be so opposed to me even making a joke about that. She is so adamant about our child being nice and kind. And so we are looking at sort of a gentle giant type situation. Somebody who's- A higher giant kind of, yeah. Yeah, he's friendly with everybody, treats everybody with respect. People don't fear him rather they respect him. Like George Mirosan, that kind of situation. people don't fear him rather they respect him. Like George Mirosan, that kind of situation. Exactly, like a My Giant Billy Crystal kind of situation.

Do you remember that movie? Yeah, that's the only reason I know George Mirosan is because of that film. Yeah, it was big for his career, definitely. I don't remember, he plays a sport of some kind. Does he play basketball in the movie? Oh yeah, he played basketball. Oh, he played basketball. Oh, in the movie.

Oh, I thought you were asking. No, no, in the movie. It's based on Andre the Giant, right? I don't know. I don't know, I just remember Billy Crystal. Isn't it Billy Crystal's relationship with Andre the Giant? Like, I never saw, because they were both-

It's my dinner with Andre. That's my dinner with Andre, that. Like I never saw, because they were both- It's my dinner with Andre. That's my dinner with Andre. That's of course. This, this, um, yeah, I, I feel like George Merchant, he has to be a wrestler or a basketball player in the, you can't really pass off a seven foot seven guy as any other type of athlete, you know. Maybe swimmer, tall swimmers. No, I think he's a bit, a bit big though, but you're right. There are tall swimmers. I just, you know, he's very tall. He's like a couple of- According to Wikipedia, the script was inspired

by Billy Crystal's friendship with professional wrestler Andre the Giant, who he met during the filming of The Princess Bride. Of course. Yes, of course they would have met. Okay, so yeah, that does, I guess that does make sense. Billy Crystal, he's still at it, eh? Oh yeah. Thank you. Don't get Graham started on this The I think we all agree that we want Billy Crystal to host the Oscars one more time

I mean just one more time to seal it all up all of the career Truly it would how old is he now? Like if he got him give him a couple more years if you're sure his health is it will hold up and everything get him right Yeah, the end right at the end of it you know what he's just completely detached from reality like if he passes away during the ceremony does he appear on the video of all the people has that happened yet I mean it's an it would be a hilarious gag from beyond the grave or it would be like that would be a great gag for any host to like fake their death

and then have them in the, it would be like so disrespectful to all the other people who actually died. It's in the poorest of days. It's like James Earl Jones and then Jimmy Kimmel. Yeah. Yeah. But remember, do you remember the last time he hosted the Oscars? What year was it?

Like 20, it might have been 2017, 2016? Oh, I would say it was 2012. Yeah, it was a long time. Was that the one with Justin Bieber? Yes. Was that really 2012? Was that long ago? Holy shit.

And I feel like he, that was when he, was that the last time he did Blackface? Uh, I don't know if it was the last time. It was certainly one of the more prominent times. It was 2012, yeah. I think that that character that he, it was the jazz singer, right? Was the character that he did.

It was, yeah, Sammy Davis Jr. He did both, but- Oh yeah, the jazz singer was like a full on character that he did at the like, where they're raising money, the, I forget what it's called. Comic relief? Comic relief, yeah, he did this whole character, this jazz singer from New Orleans,

who seemingly was a African American. He seemed to be, yeah. Yeah. He doesn't wear blackface very much in When Harry Met Sally. I mean, there's one scene. But he wears so many nice sweaters. Yeah, you don't even notice often. But it was the montages at the beginning. That was, well, his song, his song was always great. When he'd incorporate all the movies into one song.

And yeah, and then what was your guy's favorite of the, of the montages he inserted of self as? Well, I do, yeah, I think English Patient, he's like, hey, the plane goes by, I am in the desert. And he's like, awfully dry out here. I don't know what he said. Yeah, yeah. I remember that it was like, I always loved them when I was a kid,

those things where he would put himself in the movie, but I would like, they weren't really, there wasn't a lot of jokes in them. It was just kind of, he was in the movie or whatever. You know, like he would sort of do, maybe he would say something like that, it's dry out here if you're lucky, you know? Well, let's not disrespect the writing of Bruce Villeange,

but I do remember there was like a controversy because he came out, like they did the opening montage and then he entered in 1992, I guess, as in the like Hannibal Lecter, straight jacket and mask, and then Silence of the Lambs won best picture. And then the next year he came out on a horse and the Unforgiven or Unforgiven won best picture. And they were like, well, whatever Billy Crystal does

for his entrance is the winner. He's like one of those octopuses that can tell the- Yeah, he's like one of those octopuses. So that must mean that he doesn't know who wins, right? Cause you would gotta figure he wouldn't do that then, right? Yeah. I think he stopped doing that. Like because people were like, he must know. But like, I wonder, like, do I wonder who knows that information? I mean the account.

Pricewaterhousepooper. Pricewaterhousepooper. Yeah. Yeah. But as the host, I wonder if he can kind of slide into some sort of back area and just saying, come on, who, who got the best actor I wonder if he can kind of slide into some sort of back area and just say, come on, who got the best actor? You know what I mean? Yeah, let me seal these envelopes with you. I'll lick the envelope.

Oh yeah, offer help, offer help. Like, oh, it seems like that's a lot of envelopes. Well, they do like, cause they, do they have to write like jokes for every possibility of every possible winner or is it just like. Oh yeah. Wait, I mean I guess they don't really.

Yeah, they don't really they don't really make jokes afterwards. I don't think I can think of like an instance where they make direct reference. They might come by later and make a joke that's like you know in reference to something that happened in the moment but not to like. Yeah, I mean, Vileanche can, can improv as well. You can write on the fly, obviously. Get Bruce, baby. Is he still-

Have either of you guys seen that documentary, Get Bruce? Because it's wild. Is he still at it or has he passed on? Or the third option, he's retired. Are you joking me? If I know Vellanche, and I do, he's, he's writing for, for Hollywood squares until the day he dies. Regardless of if it's on the air or not.

He will continue to turn out. Back, back. Bruce Vellanche is still alive. Here is a question. Who's older, Bruce Vellanche or Billy Crystal? It's gotta be Billy. I think it's Bruce. Billy Crystal is six months older.

Yes. Oh shit, that's tight. Okay, all right. They're both born in 1948. Oh, that's a good year. That was a good year. Two years before the 50s, three years after the war ended.

Real sweet spot there. They're like okay boomers. Oh yeah, absolutely, the okayest of the boomers. Bruce Vellanche in this documentary, he would do stand-up shows, which I don't think he was a stand-up, but he would go to towns and he would write like half an hour of material just based on the town,

like one-liners about the mayor and that crazy shop you have down at the end of the street, destroyed. Oh, really? Destroyed. I mean, he was like the road comic, doing the things that they sort of joke about, but the reason that they become like hacky

is because they're so, like they work so well. Chris, the thing is he likes going to these shitty towns. Yeah, and I shouldn't have said that in hindsight at the beginning of the episode. I really don't, I don't think, listen, can I be honest? Can I be honest with the town I was talking about? Yeah, sure. It's not the one we're going to because,

hey, thank goodness we went to a mortgage broker. They said, hey, you can afford a little bit less shitty of a town, a little bit closer on the island. So here are the towns you can afford. Here are the ones there Hey, you can afford a little bit less shitty of a town, a little bit closer on the island. Here are the towns you can afford. Here are the ones there is, you can afford the third worst one. No, it was, it was Mackenzie, British Columbia. So Mackenzie, it's way, way up north, north of, uh, lights just went off, north of Prince George and it's 5,000 people or so. It's like a lumber town where everyone's moving out of it. It's got incredible amount of bugs and grizzly

bears, uh, constantly coming into town and, which means you can, you know, you can get a really nice house for like $180,000 or whatever. So, so it's like, yeah, if we were, we were thinking about that and then we're like, I think that this is not too shitty, but too remote and it's not somewhere that we could necessarily. No reliable internet. Yeah.

Oh, well half of the citizenry is bears. It sounds like there's a bug. Well, yes, Graham, please. There's also a pretty big population of bugs as well. But the fiber internet, it isn't there yet. They're like putting it in next year or something like that. So yeah, it is an actual issue using the internet as well. So that's kind of what I was referring to.

Apologies to anyone in Mackenzie. Yeah. My doctor says I need more fiber internet. Okay. Bruce Valenge coming through. Yeah, my doctor says I need more fiber internet. Okay, Bruce. Yeah, I feel like those type of towns are mostly people who are running away from something. There's some people who are on the lam or trying to trying to start their life anew. That's the who lives in that kind of town, right? Yeah, it's just it gets, you know, it gets in. I mean, hey, it gets very cold, and not

for as long anymore. Thank good, thanks to us, thanks to us, thank you, a little pat on the back for us. Yeah, now it has a much shorter winter, but still very harsh, you know, where your whole life is kind of, you know, it's minus 30 or whatever outside. Are you sticking to British Columbia or are you exploring other provinces in this gigantic country of ours? Well, we would like to stay in British Columbia because of the child again and having our family here. We want to be able to come back on a ferry versus a plane, you know, so we can come back more regularly. So it would be nice to stay in BC or, you know, somewhere on the island or whatever. Okay. Yeah. And we thought about Alberta. We thought about Alberta,

you know, because it's close and affordable, but yeah, I think, I think the, the Vancouver Island is what we've decided on. Okay. Yeah. The nice easy pace of Vancouver. Yes. I'm ready to slow the pace down, you know, just relax a little bit. You know, I, I feel it's really crazy cause I, I was a standup comedian, you know, for a long time and like my job was nothing. I mean, you know, Graham, if you're a standup community, you don't have a real

job, but it's like not in the way that other people do. And I had no responsibilities. I did whatever I wanted all the time. And then now I'm like, you know, I got a dog and a baby and I have real responsibilities and it was, it's really quite a shock for me. A dog and a baby. Oh, sometimes honestly, the dog, it feels like more work than the baby sometimes. That dog, it's a big dog, you know, he's got to go out all the- How tall is the dog?

The dog is six foot eight. Oh, shit. Wow. Yeah, no, it's a big like Aussie doodle and he's the nicest, sweetest dog, but yeah, he needs to go out all the time. And it's like, he just like, hey, I just have one second after doing all this stuff and to put the baby down. And then, he just like, Hey, I just have one second after like doing all this stuff and to put the baby down. And then you're just like one second and then the dog has to go out. You know what I mean? And it's just like, um, excuse me, is this thing called life ever going to stop? I'm excited to have more space and stuff, like try to get a house with a yard so we can let

the dog out in the backyard and just let the dog go to the washroom, you know? I mean, that's just would be such a dream. What are you doing now? You're doing an elevator trip down? You have to do several. It's a, yeah, we're on the fourth floor. So it's an elevator trip. It's, yeah, I mean, hey, if we want to get down to it, it's an elevator trip, then it's an elevator trip down to the garbage room down in the underground so I can hose his feet off, you know, because he gets them all muddy. And then it's an elevator back up top and then it's a drying situation. It's about five minutes or so. And that's twice a day that I'm doing that.

So yeah, it's not ideal. Yeah. If this, like you're picturing your dream house Do you have a dog door or is it just gonna be regular door? Maybe no dog you have a rope on it so he can close it too big. It was out too big for a doggie door You know what I mean? Like the dog just it would have to be such a big hole. I just I think that's dangerous Yeah, sort of like a Kool-Aid man door. Yeah.

You know, there's bears where we're looking. So, you know. Where? Yeah, I've never understood duck doors, like in that sense of how do you keep people and animals out of your house? And how do you keep the heat in your house? Is it just a flap? Yeah, it's a flap.

So it closes up. We definitely had, when I was growing up, we had them, maybe for cats, like the cats would use them to come in and out, I feel like. But yeah, they definitely, and we were saying, how do you keep animals out? Well, the answer is that you don't, you don't. They, a raccoon, well, it could come in just as

easily as the dog or the cat. Is there like a hard surface you can put over top of it at night or? Well, no, the whole idea is that it's so your cats can come and go or your dog can come and go when it pleases, you know, so you leave it, you got to leave it open at night. That's when it's really getting its most use. What animal would you be thrilled? Like what's your top animal that would come in through a dog door that you'd be like,

this is, I'm fine with this. This is good. Oh, okay. Because it'd have to be small enough. There's not that many small animals, a rabbit, a'd be like, I'm fine with this, this is good. Yeah, because they have to be small enough. There's not that many small animals, a rabbit, a little bunny rabbit, I guess, to hop through. I think a chameleon would be fine. Oh, a lizard, a lizard, yeah.

A Komodo dragon. A Komodo dragon. Well, yeah, that would be a little scary, I feel like, if a Komodo dragon was in your house. But it would be cool, it would be super cool. Yeah, Karen Stone's husband's staying with us. Don't worry, there's a very small chance a Komodo dragon comes in.

Is that what bit him? Yeah, got bit by a Komodo dragon. It's one of the top three trivia questions about Sharon Stone. That is, yeah, I mean, that's scary to think of. Was he seriously injured? Is he okay? Yeah. Is he okay? It was like in a private tour of a zoo. Yeah, seriously injured? Is he okay? Yeah.

It was like in a private tour of a zoo. Yeah. I think I've been by a Komodo dragon. What are the other top two trivia things about Sharon Stone? She was in a casino. Was she wearing underwear when she opened her legs in that one movie? It's one of the starting, like easy questions. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's in the Sharon Stone on Jeopardy.

That's the $200 question. Yeah. What is no? Yeah. What is, celebrity crotches for 800. What would be the most famous ones? I mean, Michael Jackson's always grabbing his. Yeah, and he grabbed his crotch. and his fall out of his jeans that.

His whole crotch fell out. Yeah. Well, I mean, it was his dick and balls. I don't know. It was his dick and balls. That's not your old crotch, but it's like, you know, most of the stuff that's in there. Yeah. He did it while he was like, uh, crouching, which sounds like a crotch.

Yeah. And he was really like, I mean, he was asking for it, but I feel like it's done him no disservice at all. The crowd was asking for it too. And they loved it and people have just been going crazy for it ever since. I feel like it's almost when something like that happens, you're like, did he plan it out? You know what I mean?

Because he's got it. I mean, he's got a good one. You want people to see it maybe he's got a good one. He wanted, you want people to see it. Maybe if you got it. It was like early days of cell phone cameras. So there wasn't, the footage isn't spectacular. That might be by design because maybe it has some issue on it that if it was more of a HD.

You think he was, he was holding back camera technology? He was no, he just said, hey, I better get this done quick. Because I mean, you could see the trajectory of camera technology. Yeah, that's true. The cameras are getting better and better. Apple just introduced their new iPhone. It comes out in a month. Oh, yeah, I gotta get my crotch out there before this. It does take a genius to say that they're gonna have, you know,

better, sort of more high definition imagery. They're gonna have a zoom on it? No, no, no, no, no. Do you guys see the ad for the new iPhone that has a function where you can plan it at a restaurant and it'll tell you what hours it's open? Oh, that's cool. Yeah, I mean.

I guess they're kind of running out of things to put on the phones that are impressive. I've had my phone for five years. Oh, shit. Mine's hanging on. Happy anniversary. Mine's hanging on for a long time, too. I think I'm at around four years or so with my iPhone.

I was thinking about getting a new one, given that it's the thing I stare at 20 hours a day. Yeah, I mean, the restaurant thing is not going to get me into the store though, I'll say. I'll wait until I need one, I think, probably. But yeah. It's also, most restaurants have some sort of menu on the window or on the website that you can find on your phone anyway I mean you could just say Siri

Can you look up that you know I mean you don't have to pull your phone up you could set it up so that it'll answer You you know on yeah, or you could just think hmm this restaurants probably open the same hours as every other restaurant Yeah, you could ballpark it probably most restaurants are going with a pretty standard. Yeah, but you're right This is a very low bar they've set for themselves with this new iPhone. This is, it's easier to look things up. Like what can you do with a phone, other than what they've done?

I feel like they've really kind of pushed it to the limits other than the watch and putting it into your ocular. They're trying to do that, that feels like the next step. But people are resistant to that I feel like Well, and also people are absolutely shitty at walking and looking at their phone I can't imagine how bad it'd be when there's just like Things coming at you in the lenses or whatever they are that does exist, right? The Google lens or whatever exists, right? Yeah. I got a new game on my phone. And normally if I get a game on my phone,

it's something I play for two minutes. But this new game, I can't play for less than an hour. Oh, wow. What is it? It's Hockey Legacy Manager. Okay. What is it? Is it?

You're like a general manager of a hockey team and you're making trades and stuff. And you can go back in time and like, You're a general manager of a hockey team and you're making trades and stuff. You can go back in time and like, I want to start this team from 1980 and draft players. Oh, wow. Do you enjoy it from a sports standpoint or more you just like the economics of it? Dave loves a trading day. He loves trading day. Do you like like, do you like, do you like

know the player? Like is it like interesting to you because you're like I want to get this player or whatever or do you care about that? Yeah, I, yeah, boy I don't know why it's interesting to me. I care less and less about why I like things. Yeah, yeah. Hey listen, I'm not trying to hold your feet over the fire. I did, I just was curious, but yeah, I, I used to love that stuff. Like baseball manager, whatever I love. Yeah. Like I get the, it's been a while since I've got the actual like EA hockey game, but I used to get it every year and I would spend like, whatever, 60 bucks on it and it would have all the new graphics and I would just be like, I just want to like simulate the

games and trade players. Yeah, I think that there are a lot of people like you though, you know, like I think that like a lot of people played those games and never ever did the game play it because it is like a fun element. Well, I'm that kind of guy and Chris, you have a show called Guys. Yeah, good segue, Dave. Really well done. Very nice, yeah.

Tell us about this podcast. This is a new podcast. I love this idea for a podcast. So it's just basically every week. I'm the co-host of it. So it's my friend Brian, Brian Quinby, who used to have a podcast called Street Fight Radio. And basically every week we look at like a different

subset of guys, lawnmower guys or like new metal guys or sex guys or whatever. And Brian goes in and finds sort of like the corner of the internet where people have become too obsessed with the thing and you know, and almost to a comical level. So like, you know, the saying that we use is it's okay to be a bunch of different guys, but you never want to just be one guy. If you just are one guy, then that's when you become, you get into trouble, you know? You just like become too heavily focused and it becomes your world.

And you start asking questions like, I wonder what Stan's dad does with their house when he's away at rehab on South Park. And you're like having like a full conversations about what's happening with the properties when like, you know, and so that's the type of stuff that we that we sort of delve into. And we've sort of become a bit of a swingers podcast as well because. I was just going to say like, what are the sex guys? Are they primarily the swinging camp? First episode that we did, yeah, with my friend, Mike Hale from your Kickstarter sucks. And he came on and we discussed swingers mostly, but really we focus on this couple. And I'm not going to say their name on here

because it's unfair. Well, we, I mean, we say, we watch their streams every week, but they're, they're, they tour sex clubs, uh, swingers clubs around North America and they like give these video tours of them and you know, they don't- Whose phalanche opens for them on the road. They don't have-

I don't think he means they tour them like as performers. No, no, I want to hear- I don't think he means it more in the way of like, I'm going to every baseball stadium with my dad. Well, they're a little, I mean, both of you are kind of right to be honest, because they are going there for the love of the game. They're going there to have sex with other people

and have other people have sex with their partners, definitely. No doubt about it, but they also work for a company called Tom's Trips. And so they actually go and like promotion, they, they have like a booth that they set up there where they're like travel agents for sex people.

And this is the really cool part about it that I just love is the guy that we watch. His name is Tom, but he's not the Tom from Tom's trips. He's a different Tom. And the guy. Yeah. So anyways, yeah, we've, we've sort of become,

because we became fascinated with this particular couple, it sort of has become this like big part of our podcast. Like, not really, I don't really love that. Because I just have so much knowledge on like the lifestyle. They call it the lifestyle or the pineapple lifestyle. And I know so much about it that it's like, I could never convince someone that I'm not in it. Yeah.

You know, if I started talking about it, it's like, I just know too much inside stuff about it, you know? You got to go to hedonism. That'll clear things up. That's the whole thing we talk about all the time. We've, listen, don't get me started on hedonism. They have a, they have a guy there who does their customer service online. It was a white gentleman named service online, who is a white

gentleman named Randy Mon, who we would read his responses quite often. Yeah, I mean, there's a big thing to try to get Brian to go to hedonism. It's a big push from the listeners to try to get him to go. I think probably, I'm guessing it's frowned upon for a single man to show up at hedonism. I feel like I would overwhelm the system. Have you, listen, that is the thing we learned the most is that the lowest of the low in the pineapple lifestyle is the single guy. They are rats.

When is he bringing to the table? They have a different set of rules at the club. It's like literally rules and then single guy rules, oftentimes not even allowed in spaces. And sometimes there's like- I'm surprised that as a swinger, like part of the rule would be you're a couple. But it's a sex club. It's a sex club. So single guys will try to get in there and again here, I'm going to get way too into it here. And- We are encouraging this. So don't feel like we don't want there's a thing called

Cockholding and a hot wife bowl situation and a bowl is Technically a single guy but he's gonna have to be a you know a real kind of a muscle man or a guy with a real hammer or whatever and Somebody who really like Thor is what you're saying a muscle guy with a hammer Well somebody who has sex really good, you know? And so then- I've heard of these guys. Single guys, they really want to become a bull, you know? That's what you're sort of aspiring to do.

But yeah, for the most part, they're all just little, they're considered vermin. And if they like come into a room, as a single guy, there's situations where you can come into a playroom with a couple, but if the couple leaves, you have, as a single guy, there's, there's situations where you can come into a playroom with a couple. But if the couple leaves, you have to go to, and we always like love to picture like, you know, the security shooing out single guys who are trying to like stick around there

in the shadows after their couple left. Flashing lights in their face. Hey, what are you doing over there in the corner? But yeah, it was really, it's one of the real running jokes on our podcast is how much we despise single guys, you know, like every time they get brought up, we're just, ugh, you know, because it's, they're just spoken with, like, they're just so despised. Of course, yeah, we talk, it does make perfect sense, you know, guys are way too horny and a single guy in that situation is just like bringing all sorts of horrible energy and not doing anything good. So it makes sense, you know?

Dude, I wonder, do they have like little tricks that they do like, oh yeah, no, my wife is in the other room. That's what we, yeah, most definitely like, oh, like pretending to be on the phone, just like, oh, you're just going to be here in two minutes. Sounds good, honey. I'll just wait inside for you. It's like nice try, Billy. Like, you know, everyone. I love somebody taking a call in the swingers room. Oh man. It, there's a, yeah.

And there's no chomping in the, in the swingers room. Chomping is, that's a different thing. That's from jam bands from like fish and jam bands and stuff. There's this concept of chomping. It's when the music's playing, but somebody talks to you, they're known as a chomper. Um, so yeah, we've learned that that's also an issue in sex rooms as well, is that people will be chomping and you're just trying to have sex. You're not trying to talk about stuff, you know? Right. And they're like, who do you think would be better, Yermi

Yager and the trade, doing that game on your phone? Yeah, or maybe they finished up or whatever and they're like in between and they're just sort of chatting about something and it's like, well, I'm still going here, you know? I'm still working on something over here, bro. They look really, really like all the sex clubs look, especially because the tours we watch, like they don't know how to do it with lighting and like do it well. Because we've watched other tours of the same clubs and they look fine. But then when they do it, it's like, it just looks so when they show you the playrooms, like the actual rooms where you have sex,

they're really scary, like scary horror movies, scary, you know, like they're really have a sort of scary element to them. But you know, that's the, that's some people's whole kink, right? Yeah, I mean, there's super scary dungeons and stuff. This is it. I'm saying it's not, it's just, they're meant to be just a normal room, but they're just so scary and dirty. They have like a medical table beside them or something. You know, it just, it's, it's a, you'd have to watch to really understand what I mean, none of the, none of the walls go up to the ceiling.

You know, it just doesn't seem like a real, it's like almost like a fake place, you know, like like it's a set. Yeah Yeah, I love that Like our podcast doesn't have any concept that we were we got in the game before you needed a concept Yeah, and we never adopted one along the way. No, and I love hearing that yours Has this great concept but it is now too feared. It's also just about this one couple. Well, I try to, you know, I say to Brian, I say we do need to watch ourselves and make sure that we don't become a swingers podcast because I don't want to, I don't want to do a swingers podcast, you know? Question. And I'm sure you know the answer. Are there swingers podcasts?

Oh yes. Oh, there's plenty. There's like awards and we've watched award shows where they give awards to like there's magazines and stuff and the How come with the week, we, boy, it's been so long since we won an award, Graham. We need to get in on these. Yeah, but these are like, like, you know how like, yeah, like they're done on zoom or whatever these award shows and they're just in a hotel room. Are the, the establishments winning awards or is the best swingers like couples and people and I guess like like a single guy best best sex toy. Best sex toy is definitely one of them.

And by the way, I do want to say I am firmly a I'm team motor bunny. We do not respect the Sibian around here. We are not fans of the Sibian. Oh, no Sibian for you. The Sibian is a- Too high octane or- No, it's an inferior product. The Motor Bunny is just more reliable.

It's got more attachments. Of course, our friends, Tom and his wife, they're sponsored by the Motor Bunny as well. So- Oh, sure. I just, I'm Googling it right now. And is it something you sit on as well as this? Yeah, it's, it's, yeah, it's like the Sibian. It's exactly.

So it's like a thing that you sit on for anyone who's wondering if you don't know what the Sibian is, if you didn't again, listen to Howard Stern, like I did. The Sibian is like, yeah, you sit on it and it has like a vibrating element. It has, you know, things you can attachments you can put on. Um, but the cool thing about it. I use the Fonzie attachment. The sit on it, it's a thumb. I use the water pick. That's the attachment I'm most addicted to.

Hey, these couple brings this thing around to like, cause they're flying, you know, so they like bring, it's like a huge. Oh, where's my European adapter? It has a huge suitcase, like a huge motor bunny suitcase. And it's like, a lot of people know what the motor bunny is. You know, you're just walking around the airport. Also, it's like, you know, when you go through the line and they say, do you

have any big electronics in your bag? You have to take those out and put it on the tray. So everybody knows. Oh my goodness. Having you take your motor bunny out and put it into one of the trays in front of everyone would be absolutely humiliating for most people. Not at any tablets, laptops, motor bunnies, or civians, whatever you got in that crazy suitcase there.

And you're giant. Actually that gallon of lube is too big to bring on the plane. You're getting your lube confiscated because you brought too much. Don't pour it out. Don't pour it out. I'll use it. I guess you would be buying new lube town to town because you can't. Don't pour it out.

I'll use it. Sorry. That was very funny, Dave. Cover me in it. What kind of guy do you think you are Graham? In the, I cause macho guys that are into being macho. We're doing guys, guys, guys, like man, guys. That's me.

I'm a man. I would say your Graham, I would put you as like a, uh, garage sale guy. Oh, I'm a garage sale guy. That's a good, that's a good one. I haven't garage sales, thrift stores, flea markets, the whole, the whole shebaz. I mean, wrestling guy a little bit, maybe. Yeah, probably less. Less now, maybe.

I'm a simulator, a sports league guy. Yeah, yeah, you're a sports league guy. You're well, that's, that's got to be an area of guys. People like fantasy sports and fantasy sports guys. Most guy. Well, that's gotta be an area of guys, people like fantasy sports and- Oh yeah. Fantasy sports guys, most definitely. We have that, these are, we actually, I'm not just making this up,

these are really like ones that we're doing very soon as fantasy sports guys as well. Yeah, I mean, I think I am, I'm a sports guy probably mostly. I realize that I'm a productivity guy as well. We did that episode just just in the sense. Oh yeah. Do you discover things about yourself?

Yeah. You realize things for sure. And yeah, I realized that I like, it's important. Like I have some of the same sort of, you know, um, quirks or whatever. And I, but yeah, again, it's, they're called kinks. It's totally, it's totally normal to be a bunch of guys, you know. Yeah, I heard Brian on doughboys talking about the show and he was talking about guitar guys. Yeah. And he said he would they go you you went to the guitar subreddit and you just search the word wife and it's

people who's like wives are telling them to get rid of their guitars and stuff. Yeah, that's a big thing that we've realized is a lot of these people are spending too much money on their thing and it causes issues with their wife. Guitar guys are big ones because guitars are expensive. And these guitar guys are like, they're buying so many guitars, Graham. They're not just buying a couple, they're buying like 20 guitars and they're like thousands of dollars, some of them, you know, so yeah, it becomes an issue. I heard about a guy, a friend of a friend, I think, who he has a kayak, he's a big kayak guy,

and he wanted to buy a brand new, like, state of the art kayak and his wife was like, absolutely not, so he used his old one, he'd strapped to the roof, drive it over to his friend's house where he kept the brand new kayak that he secretly purchased and then go kayaking in that. Switch the boats, come back. That's exactly the type of guy that we would love to talk about. We would love to know more about. That is exactly it though, you know? Just that thing where you're just like, huh, that's really kind of fucked up. You know what I mean?

Like, yeah, it's like you are lying to your spouse. You ever thought about maybe like, yeah, just sort of like addressing it or figuring it out or coming to some. Um, yeah, that's, uh, they, they love to say, we see it on the, them all the time. It's people respond.

They'll say like, yeah, if she, if she wants to tell you can't buy my, uh, buy that kayak, ask her about how many shoes she buys, you know, that's like a huge thing. One that we love too. There was one guy who said like, yeah, my wife was trying to bug me. It was like, Oh, what about all the hair straighteners you buy? And that was his big, so that's the one we use now is like a go to like, Oh, really? You have a problem with the 17 guitars I bought?

Yeah, so it really does feel like, yeah, that a lot of them are doing it at the expense of relationships and everything like that. Yeah, the trying to outfox your partner. Yeah, trying to trick them and trying to Actively trying to hide things from them, you know, like creating secrets in your relationship Yeah, yeah, yeah the Yeah, the the idea of a guy that's I feel like I know guitar guys I feel like in my life I've Brushed up against the guitar guy or two. Yeah, there's a Christian comedian that I watch on the Mike Huckabee show who we randomly saw him doing an interview and he just had like 20 guitars by the – it's a little sneaky,

you just never know who's going to be a guitar guy. They don't even have to be musical necessarily. What about a drum guy? Do you know drum guys? Have you ever known a drum guy? Not as much, I think. I mean, not for collecting drums. Well, David Letterman, apparently, because I made that video all those years ago

about him asking all the drummers if- It was their drum. If they were his, their drums or they were rental drums. And then occasionally he would like, oh, if they're your drums, do you want to sell them to me? And no one could tell if this was a bit, but apparently he has like quite a, like a drum collection. See that's, I was just going to say though,

you have to be, you have to be so rich or whatever, cause you have to have so much space to put all of the drums. I think generally if you are like a late night talk show host, you have some weird obsession. But there's also like different types of drums, right? You got your bongos and you've got your like weird,

those boxes that you can play or buckets or you know. Graham's kind of an expert himself. Yeah, yeah, I like a drum. He was buying drum kits though, like full kits. I think so, yeah. People like rock and roll kits. Yeah, that's a take up a lot. But yeah, you're right though, Dave. He might've just like, he was like, why the hell you get to have a whole thing, you know,

full of cars? I can't have a whole full thing full of, you know, something. This is his conversation with Jay Leno. Yeah, yeah. In his head. Yeah, he's muttering to himself. Muttering to himself exactly while he's mowing the lawn or whatever. Dave Letterman, both a drum guy and a lawn guy.

He's the crossover between the two. Yeah. I want to be a lawn guy. That's the thing I'm most accept. People are like, what if you have, what about you have to take care of your lawn? And I was like, that's like such a dream for me, you know, to just get out in the garden and listen to some sort of podcast or something. carry your lawn. I was like, that's like such a dream for me, you know, to just get out in the garden and listen to some sort of podcast or something and just spend the day out there.

Like that's, that's super, super nice. I mean, with mowing your lawn, you can't listen to anything because your lawnmower is so loud. Uh, have you ever heard of noise canceling headphones, my friend? I mean, awful lot of noise. It, listen, the technology they got nowadays, it's like, you couldn't get enough noise. They'll cancel every, you give them the most noise you got and they'll cancel it in a second. How do they do that? How is it done?

Are they spraying the noise with some kind of Agent Orange? Yeah, like with a noise hose or something like that, yeah. Well then, oh, you guys got it all wrong, the noise. So I'm in a sub hose or something like that. Yeah. Well, then you guys got it all wrong. The noise. So I'm in a sub Reddit called no lawns. Okay. That is pronounced nylon. Yeah, sorry.

It's my I'm in the dialogue guy, the acapella band. No, and it's just it's like, hey, how about instead of growing your lawn, have a bunch of Zinnia flowers. Yeah, that's right. Dave's got a, he's like become full green thumb. So Dave, do you have a lawn? I have a lawn in the back for the dogs to go to the bathroom, but in the front, I'm a,

you know, I plant, I mulch. So you're saying you're a no-lawn guy up front. Yeah. Like a rock garden as well or just putting the full rock? Because people do that and they can make it look quite nice. No, just plants. Plants, okay. So but plants that don't require mowing, obviously.

Right. There is a certain kind of plant that doesn't require mowing, obviously. There is a certain kind of plant that doesn't require mowing. So you, just watering, or even no watering. I mean, we live in a pretty wet part of the world. Jaxing yourself. As youths, did you guys have to mow the family, the house's lawn? Did you have a lawn growing up, Chris?

Yeah, I did. I had a lawn at my dad's house. My parents got divorced when I was like four or five. At my mom's house in the beginning, you say nice. Yeah, well, listen, I'm still not totally, so if we could not talk about it. Oh, okay. I'm still not totally, so if we could not talk about it. Yeah, they, they had to, yeah, my, when I was younger in mountains, we had like a big yard, like a backyard that came around to a side yard, you know?

Oh yeah. We had like a ranch or not a huge house, but the yard was quite big and a big front yard as well. So it was like a lot of work and I had to do it super regularly and didn't really love doing it because I wanted to do other stuff. Yeah. Yeah. I wanted to throw cinder block through a front windshield of a minivan one time for no reason. You wanted to do that just one time? That's what I did. It's the thing I think

about the most from my child that I have so much regret for it. How old were you? I was like 16 or something or like, you know, and I just thought it was funny. I would have been drinking or whatever. It was early drinking days and we were just doing stuff like that, you know? And I did a lot of stupid shit, but that thing, I just, it will never get out of my head. Just the pure, there's no reason for it at all. There's so much destruction. Now I have it, you know, I got a car loan. I can't imagine someone does that to my Kia.

You know what I mean? You imagine waking up and there's just a cinder block through your windshield. Oh, you'd be so late for work. Well, I just might have talked about it. I mean, it would be covered actually. It's not that big of a deal. But that day though, you got to be pissed that you can't go to

Costco or wherever you are going. Yeah. Well, I mean, yeah. I mean, if I even have a membership at that point, I don't know how my life's going, you got to be pissed that you can't go to Costco or wherever you're going. Yeah. Well, I mean, yeah. I mean, if I even have a membership at that point, I don't know how my life's going, you know? It's not cheap. Obviously, someone's throwing a cinderblock through your windshield for a reason. Well, yeah, that's what you think, Dave, but not always. Sometimes it's just somebody driving by with their friends. It was just the pointlessness of it, you know, that sticks out to me.

Were you caught for this infraction? No, never. I got away with it. It's got free. You know, maybe- What's the statute of limitations on this? It maybe would have done me a little bit of good if I hadn't gotten caught, to be honest. Taught me a lesson, you know? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You could have gone to like a Maury Povich style or maybe Montell Jordan, I guess. Was he? Montell Williams?

Montell Williams. Montell Jordan was this is how we do it. This is how we do it. That's right. The talk show. This is how we talk about it. Montell Williams. Yeah.

He had those as well. He did boot camp. He had the boot camp. Maury had, a lot of them were doing the boot camp for a while. Yeah, that's right. It was a hot chance. And they had. Jenny Jones may have had a boot camp as well.

Jenny Jones had a boot camp because they had, like the guy came out and he was like really, I remember, you know, he was really aggressive. One of them, you know, it seemed like it was, it didn't seem like it was really right. The way he was yelling at those children in their faces. Also like the scared straight where they take them to the prisons. Feel like that was another echelon of... That seems like a scary, a bad idea as well. Very bad idea.

I also feel like they would... I brought this up before, but on the same shows, they would take, you know, one bad kid one week would get boot camp. The next week they'd give the bad kids makeovers. It was like, well, yeah, the transformation. Yeah, those shows were, oh man, I watched so much of that crap. I, they, they, um, people are always talking about like, oh yeah, nowadays, like, um, I even say it. Kids like watch Logan Paul and stuff like that and getting raised by that kind of crap.

And it's like, at least, you know, but then I think about it, it's like, that's what I was watching when I was like 12 years old, was Jenny Jones' bootcamp makeovers, you know? It wasn't really the best stuff either. Yeah, exactly. When you look back, you're like, back in my day we had the high brow.

Yeah, we had, you know, we had like Jerry Spr Springer but he was very self-aware you know he was very aware of what he was doing he had a message at the end like yeah did you know he was like a really smart politician yeah a lot of people didn't know he the there's a guy ages and ages ago did comedy here in Vancouver and he fibbed his way onto Jerry Springer. Is it Jai Harris? That's Jai Harris. Yes, I remember that very well because I did comedy with him and I remember-

And Riel Haan as well. Riel Haan. It was really exciting to me. It was. At the time it was insane. It's like if you had wormed your way out to the Ed Sullivan show or something like that. Yes, very similar.

It really made me think like how much of the Jerry Springer show is fake. Yeah. That was when I started questioning a few things as well. On every episode, it would be like, the episode would be about like, you're my wife is cheating on me with my cousin. Then they would go to break and they would ask for a new crazy thing. Hey, viewers, is your mother a sex worker or whatever? I don't know. But then obviously,

if you want to go on Jerry Springer, just say yes to whatever. Yeah. Yeah. And that's, I think why it had that feel of like not being real, you know, because there was a bunch of actors doing like improvisers and stuff doing this.

Yeah. And no one's. Yeah, they were just taking suggestions from Jerry Springer. Yeah, exactly. But they would, and everyone would end up in violence. It was important that it did. Yeah. It was, it's like, it was like, yeah, it wasn't a show. That's when I really realized it was completely fake was when they,

because in the beginning there was some violence and it seemed like, oh, this is kind of cool. But then it was like, oh, this is what people like, so let's give them violence every time. And I'm like, I know how violence works. It doesn't happen every time. Yeah, sometimes it's throwing a cinderblock through a minivan's window. Yeah, sometimes it's passive. And sometimes there's no confrontation at all.

And it was clear that they were really just sort of, and also Steve Wilcox, you know? He got his own show. When he got his own show, he was like, just sort of, and also Steve Wilcox, you know. He got his own show. When he got his own show, he was like, Jerry Springer is like really good in the sense that it was like such bullshit that was going on, but he could play it like it was real.

Like he was like a good actor. He was something of a ringmaster. He was actually a very smart politics guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But yeah, so I feel like Steve Wilcox He was actually a very smart politics guy. Yeah. But yeah, so I feel like Steve Wilcoz sort of tried to do the same show and he's just got this big buffoon and he could never make it seem like it was even halfway real. And then he left and he formed his band, Wilco. Oh, he's the guy who found Wilco.

Yeah, he's from Jeff Tweedy and Steve Wilco's. That would be a good idea for a show that's a bouncer shiprun show and it's just you see who gets into the taping and who doesn't make it into the taping and that's the big show. Just the audience? Yeah just the audience just seeing you know, like Club 54 or whatever. Yeah, they have a bouncer show. I mean, listen, nowadays, on YouTube, you can find UK bouncers, and that's literally what it is. It's just these big, you know, British lads who are just, you know, beating the shit out

of people who are trying to get into a club. But I also want, like, the element of, like, who's in a good costume? Who's a group of people who are trying to get into a club. But I also want the element of who's in a good costume, who's a group of people I want to let in. Sort of a more reality show style, like characters and stuff. Yeah. Every week at the club, every weekend you don't know who's good lucky enough to get into the club,

how many single guys there are in line that are bringing nothing to the party. Yeah, yeah, that's you got it, Dave. You got it. That's that is it. That's exactly the sound they make. Can I come in and practice some sex? Practice some sex.

I want to get really good. I mean, you know what does come with practice if you're if you're looking to work on something, just why not sex? How do you get to the sex club at Carnegie Hall? That's right. There isn't a sex club in Vancouver, by the way. Not a full-timer? Yeah, not a full-time one. There's like events they could put on or whatever, but there's not like a club, unfortunately,

you know, because I would, well, I would go, no, truly, because I would go there and do a video tour of it. Like we're doing a live show. Actually, this is pretty exciting. We're doing a live show at the Biltmore for any AS guys. Brian's coming to town to do a live guys with blocked party. So blocked party. Nice.

When, when, when is that October 11th and 12th at the Biltmore. Yeah. Tickets, individual tickets go on sale on nine 11th. So this will be out and it's tomorrow. I don't want to ruin it for everyone when we record it, but I just did. And, but the, the, yeah. So when Brian was in, if he was in town, we would go and tour the sex, like I would contact them and explain to them our stream and then we're going to go. So I'm going to do that when I go to Columbus, because they do have a sex club is we're going to contact them and explain, we have this podcast and the stream that we do and we'd love to come in like in the daytime and just do a tour of the sex club for our stream.

I know there's one in Toronto that quite a few comedians I know have played at, that they had like a stand-up show that was in the Swingers Club. I know that to be true for sure. Yeah. It's not a bovine sex club, is it? I don't know. Because that was a venue in Toronto. The bovine sex club? Yeah.

Oh. No, it was like, there was a bunch of people I know who did it. Definitely. I remember talking to somebody about it. In fact, maybe even somebody came on the podcast on guys and talked about it, like a Toronto comic, maybe Chris Locke. It could have been Chris Locke. But yes, I think somebody mentioned it definitely because inevitably in every episode we end up talking about swingers and stuff. So yeah.

I love it. What if you became just through just fumbling into you become the number one swinger pod in North America? I think you maybe are. I think it's again, yeah, it's a pretty big podcast. I think if we, if we sort of went that direction and called ourselves that, I think technically we would be, but not in the community. We wouldn't be respected in the community. You guys know that, you know, upside down pineapple, you know what that is? Yeah, I've seen it. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So we would. It's the only pineapple I eat. So yeah, I think we wouldn't be able, I, I, I couldn't deal with it honestly, because it

would, I'd feel like a fraud. I've never, I've never done the thing before. You know what I mean? So it'd be the Steve Wilco of the swingers podcast, I'd be a complete fraud. I would be, I have no idea. John Mellencamp show up, start sucking on other people's chili dogs.

Yeah. I mean, I mean, and then honestly it's like, yeah, you gotta be worried as well if you're like, obviously relationships fine right now, but you're doing a Swinger podcast and all of a sudden you break up with your partner and then what happens then? I tell you what, you lose every single one of your subscribers because you're a disgusting single guy. Yeah, no one wants to listen to 90 minutes of ha ha ha. Combing your greasy hair. You can hear the hair getting combed on mic. You show up to the sex clubs at like 2 p.m. Anybody here yet?

With like a drug store bag full of condoms. Going up early, being the first guy there at the sex club, people come in. No early birds. Hey guys. Hey. Can I help you set up? What are you guys? I brought up mixed tape.

A really important thing, if you are seriously gonna go to a sex club or a swingers club, is it is important that you, if you cannot wear stiletto heels on the furniture. And that is a thing that is discussed quite often because a lot of the times they wear stiletto heels. And you can't. Oh, poke right through.

Yeah, exactly. And then this is our theory, but our theory is that because it's leather couches, so that way, any sort of fluids or whatever easily wiped off. But if you've got a hole in that sucker, all of a sudden a fluid funnel or, you know, a little, and it just, boom, straight down into it and it just gets soaked up inside the couch. So it's very important that you do not wear. And also a lot more single guys start showing up. I hear there's some holes in the couch. Yeah, that's totally true.

All of a sudden, now the single guys got somewhere to put it, you know? JD Vance shows up on opening night. Hey, I hear you, man. OK, enough politics here, bud. Oh, buddy, come on. He's the foremost couch fucker. We've all done it.

I have. Just shut out to, I will mention that on any AS on my channel, I have pranked JD Vance, I have his cell phone number and I have called him and spoken to him before he doesn't answer. What did you do? I forget nothing, nothing too serious. I think, um, I, it was some comment about him having the softest hands in America. Um, but I forget the context of it.

It wasn't, it wasn't, um, you know. It wasn't as good as the one where I showed a drawing of Donald Trump sucking his own penis. It wasn't brilliant sort of eye. It wasn't high brow. Yeah, it wasn't at that level. You know who have the, I think, across the board, softest hands of any business is stand-up comedians. They have some real velvety smooth hands in stand-up, not a lot of lifting or being,

yeah, not a lot of work. I will say in my defense, I did work in warehouses and so I did proper work for many years in my life, but yeah, my hands aren't still hard from that. They've softened up now and they're very soft, very soft. And I've done shows in smaller towns or cities that are industry-based. Nasty. And when they shake your hand, to them it must feel like such a pleasant pillowy sensation.

Oh yeah, because to you it feels, it's like sandpaper, you know? Yeah, exactly. It's so rough for me, but... It's so rough. Sometimes I shake someone's hand in a small town or whatever, and their hand is so... It's like it has little knives on it or whatever. Like, what the heck? Yeah. It's somebody that could strike a match on their hand and light it yeah i'm like hey do you know have you ever heard of an exfoliator my friend Dave what's going with you man oh man nothing man man, nothing, man. Tell me all about it. Well, so here's the thing.

I mean, we talked a little bit about free stuff in the neighborhood. So I walk my dogs and more and more. You got those for free in the neighborhood, right? They were just sitting out in the alley? They crawled out of a drainpipe. It was a miracle. But I noticed more and more those free libraries. People have been putting up those free libraries.

Oh yes, there's one by my place too, yeah. And I like them and it's like, you know, how many is too many? I wonder if like, cause you see maybe one on a block and then I wonder if someone is ever like, you know, how many is too many? I wonder if like, because you see maybe one on a block. And then I wonder if someone is ever like, I was going to put one up, but now I can't because we can't have two on one block. Yeah. What is it?

When does it? Because it could get into a situation where it's like, then there's just, there's not the demand for the books and they're just getting filled up or whatever. But I weirdly like, so I have been using them more and more, mostly to take, I rarely give. Sure. And I see people sometimes go to them and drop a bunch off and there's one, a great one down the street

that's like overflowing. Like this is the most used library in the neighborhood. Yeah, and like a couple of weeks ago, our past guest, Alicia Tobin had a garage sale, and a very nice old man came at the very end and was like, hey, if you're getting rid of those books, I'll just put them in the free libraries around the city. I was like, this is as quaint as it gets.

I don't remember these things before the pandemic. Did they just sprout out? I saw a few. I would see them from time to time, but not like at the level I do now. They've definitely exploded in popularity. I've never looked in one of them, of course, can't read. But what do they actually have in the,

like I always wonder that, do they have like good quality? It's a fake bookshelf and you pull it and the tree opens up. No, is there like quality books in there? Do you know what I mean? It's okay. Generally what you get is a lot of romance novels. You get a lot of like those kinds of authors who churn out books like James Patterson, Clive Custler.

Harlan Coban. Sure. Yeah. And I do kind of like judge the person, even though it's supposed to be the community is just dropping off books. I judge you if it's outside your house and I judge that like, oh, this person's very well read

or this person, an awful lot of wrestling books in here. So you don't see- I think wrestler autobiographies in here. You can't attach it to the person's house. I know, I can't. They're not the ones filling it up. I know, logically, I know that you don't, but in my mind I'm like, oh, this idiot, this idiot again.

Yeah, he's attracting Hulk Hogan biographies. Yeah, yeah, that's true. There is like something that he said from maybe you're attracting sort of stupidity in your general area and, or just, it just kind of looks like a dumb kind of place, you know? Where dumb guys would go. Yeah, the house looks dumb. They look like dumb people would live there.

Their cars, their cars are parked on its side and all the windows are askew. And they have a sign on the free library that says, no books. Yeah, no books. And it's spelled library. The R is backwards. Yeah. But we have gotten mostly kids books out of there. And that's something, from what I can tell, has a pretty high rotation. Yes, like you read read the kids book

You know unless it becomes a beloved favorite how it goes in comes new kid book Yeah, and with age I think that you know There's books that obviously the kids age out of like everything with kids, you know, they just use it for a short time but I do feel like they I mean, I don't know my son is, sorry, he's not at reading age yet, but yeah, they, I feel like they'll have stuff that they'll get obsessed with. But my nephew is like three, he'll get obsessed with something and then give, and then forget about it in like a month or whatever. Chris, he may not be at reading age yet,

but you know you can read to him. Yeah, we read to him, don't worry. Don't worry, we read to him. We have books, we got like books for the bath and we have the books that he can grab, you know, that, yeah, we, hey listen. Chapter one, Hulk Hogan used to be called Terry Balia. Let's see, this is what you're,

it's, I understand Dave's mistake here is he's sort of saying to me like it's important to read to your child, but he's, he's like thinking of a normal sized child. I have a gigantic child that's not going to need to be able to read or whatever. It's almost going to be more endearing if he can't, you know what I mean?

No, but he can crush a coconut in his bare hand. Oh man. Yeah. If it was a race between being tall or smart, I would pick tall nine times out of 10 because smart, come on, where's that getting you? Yeah. Where's that getting you on the dating apps? Oh, great. You can go figure out how to, go figure out where the stool is to go grab the thing on the top shelf. I've already got it. You're so smart. You figured it out. You figured where the stool is.

Well, using deduction. Yeah. So I've just been more and more I used to kind of just walk past them. But now I look look in every free library. Yeah, I like them. I've definitely I've definitely dropped off quite a few books at them like just during a spring cleaning blitz like I'm not interested in this. This chapter book anymore, this coffee table book, away they go.

And there is a dog library too that just has balls in it. Yeah. That's kind of nice, that's cute. I mean, I just like it as a community thing though. It is kind of nice. It like makes you feel like you're in some sort of a community, even though maybe we aren't really, you know? Like it makes you feel like you're like,

oh, my neighbors and I, we like, you know, we're like, we're old timey, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is what you'll get in your small town that you moved to. There'll be all sorts of barbecues. Until harvest time and one of you has to be killed. Yeah.

That's true, sacrifice. The one thing that I did though, if you live in a real small town, the thing that I'll have to get used to is that everyone like knows about you, you know what I mean? So everyone's like, oh, did you hear get used to is that everyone like knows about you, you know what I mean? So everyone's like, Oh, did you hear like Chris is starting to run in the morning? You know what I mean?

Like that type of shit like that, you don't have to worry about that around here. It makes the local newspaper. Sources say, yeah, doofus thinks he's gonna do it again. We do have neighbors we know that we don't, we've never met, but we're like, oh yeah. They got another dog or like, yeah, yeah. But you don't like, you don't talk about it at like the shops or whatever, what the shop people and it doesn't get around town. It's just me and Abby.

And we're like, Hey, they're, they're, uh, they're opening an Airbnb next door. Oh, cool. Oh, that's, that's some good. That's cool. Yeah. We did it. We actually did real estate guys and we covered Airbnb hosts and we discovered that they

are amongst some of the worst people. Uh, yeah, that, that we've ever encountered. Um. Deranged would be the word I use. Yeah, they are pretty upset about not being able to video monitor the people constantly in every room. I don't really understand why. Because that's what they got into the business for.

I don't understand why they're not able to do it. There was one Airbnb host who rented out their Airbnb, but then the person left a review saying like, well, there was a pool in the backyard, but then we found out we couldn't use the pool between like 12 and seven because they rented out the pool on Swimpley.com, which is a real thing. Which is a real thing. It's a real thing. I don't know if you guys watch English Teacher, the new TV show with Brian Jordan Alvarez. It's on FX and it's super, super funny. It just came out.

I just heard about it today. Yeah, it's very, very funny, but they make a reference to Swimpley in that. Like one of the characters is like, I'm building a pool so I can rent it out on Swimpley because no one in the neighborhood's on Swimpley. And I just know that most people were like, oh, that's a funny sitcom joke, you know? Yeah. Not realizing that this is the awful reality that we've created for ourselves in this world. I would go in a, I would go in a Swimply pool, you know, on a hot summer day,

looking up a pool I can hop in and splash around for a while. I'd do it. Yeah, I think that's normal and reasonable. I think it's just kind of the idea of it just, you know, just renting out all your stuff and your life and it's just kind of weird, you know. But that's where we are, you know,

nobody's private about anything anymore and just it's all there and who cares, you know. Swimply. Swimply. Swimply.com. Somebody was like, hey, I got a good idea. Swimply. And then it was like, it turned out they were right in some way. Like, I don't know if that, it'll probably fail like all those other, you know, but it seems to have some success. And it also seems like something that came from a typo. Like things are going swimply.

Huh, huh, what about... Well, Graham. Yeah. Graham, what's going on? Well, before we get to Graham, this week our episode is brought to you by Swimply. Use offer code, stop podcasting yourself. Swimply, Swimply for when you just got a swim.

Now, Graham, what's going on with you? This past week, past guest Alicia Tobin had myself and Sally over for dessert and watching a documentary from Disney Plus about a haunted house that is an extreme haunted house. And man, did I not know this was a thing, but this is apparently its own. This could be a guy's thing. Oh, it is. We already did it, yeah.

You did the haunted house, like extreme haunted houses? Oh yeah, we did the extreme haunted houses. And there's this guy who like tries to kill people. Do you know about that guy? This is the guy. That's what the documentary's about. Oh, that's what the documentary's about. Yeah, we did this.

We talked all, yeah. It's really, really psychotic. So, I'm confused. So what makes it a haunted house? Is it like a truly haunted house or is it like a thing where, come to my haunted house, I'll scare you. Graham just watched the documentary so he knows better, but it started as a house and then it-

Yeah, it started as a house with actors jumping out and scaring people. And then it evolved and evolved and evolved, especially with the internet and people being able to find communities and things that they all are passionate about. And this became a thing where it would be like extreme, like you have to fill like a ton of consent forms out and they'll like tape you up and they'll like push you

into shallow water and chain you up and drip'll like push you into, you know, into shallow water and you know, chain you up and drip stuff all over your head. Just crazy, crazy stuff. I've got drip stuff all over my head. Just water. No, that's the weird thing is the first thing they do is they cover everybody in this grease. They pour grease over their heads right off the bat. And then you've just got greasy hair the whole time

Which we know nothing scarier than that. I'm right fellas Yeah, all of a sudden you start saying like I don't even need my wife and oh I just need a hole in a couch But and and correct me if I'm wrong, but at this point it's's this challenge that no one's ever completed. Is that right? I think, yeah, that's the thing. If you complete it, I believe there's a huge cash reward, but no one has ever completed it because it's basically impossible to complete because it's just a sadist who's torturing people basically.

Yeah, it's torture. It's people are signing up and then the one guy, and I was like, huh, I guess that is true. What is the challenge? You just have to survive? Yeah, you have I was like, huh, I guess that is what is the challenge you just have to survive. Yeah, you have to not leave or whatever, I guess. And everyone's like, you have to not quit before. But it's like the guy said, you know, there are people who are like ultra marathoners that run through the desert for days on end. And I was like, well, yeah, fair enough.

That's also a thing that's insane. So there are people who this this is their whole thing, is they love any kind of extreme, scary stuff. I don't know how you find out that that's your thing. I think I watched a documentary about that, about the ultra marathoners. Oh yeah, I think I did too. And they would use metal rods

and duct tape their heads to metal rods so that they would stay awake while they ran. See, that sounds way worse than a haunted house where you get grease poured on you. Yeah, it does. I mean, it's yeah, it's sounds like it's very dangerous. You know, like you can easily pass out and die. I think some people died. Yeah. Oh, I think a lot of them would. I mean, there's a lot of people just go into the desert on hikes or whatever Or you know and then they die it happens quite often Very like it's a it's a real reality You're doing that kind of thing. I don't think anyone has ever died at this guy's thing, right?

No, but so this is the this is the thing is the documentary was made Like a couple years ago And as most of these documentaries are that are kind of like put out super quick, they run out of steam after the first 45 minutes. Like they're like, okay, this is the thing. This is the conflict of it. And then they don't have any more new info to say. So they just start repeating that these talking heads

just start repeating things and they kind of make a weird narrative that wasn't there before. Because it's like four people who did it and nobody that worked there and nobody that like covered it or anything like that. But the whole time they're like, he's going to do something fucked up. He's going to do something fucked up. And I was like, see, you made the documentary too early because now he has done something fucked up.

He is like been charged with like manslaughter or attempted murder or something. Oh, really? Yeah, so he's He's no longer the cool guy that makes a scary haunted house Yeah, and you know what some people say that he's kind of always been this guy that he is today, you know But it just kind of caught up with them But yeah that it is funny when you get into a documentary like that, that is following a real life event in real time if you're doing it like that. And then it's just kind of like, man, nothing really happens in the end.

It's like, oh, fuck, I worked really hard on this project and it has no ending. Oh, yeah. Yeah. There's also like, there was one about an amusement park where everybody got hurt. Oh, yeah, that one's a, yeah, that's that. What's his name? Johnny Knoxville did like a movie of comedy version of that. That's action, whatever, right?

Yeah, class action park. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's the documentary. Yeah, class. I remember someone did die on that, on that crazy one where they're just like going down the sled down the mountain or whatever, and they fell off of the sled thing and died Yeah But the the thing with that is the same thing these documentaries run out of steam because after they tell you that story of it, there's still half an hour left of Well now what like the worst thing has possibly happened

Yeah, we haven't left anything in the tank for the rest of the documentary. So you just start repeating everything It was one about Abercrombie and Fitch that was the same thing. It ran out of gas at the 20-minute mark. Yeah, there's no resolution on the class action park one. You know what I mean? No. It just got shut down. Nothing really happened. It's like, yeah, the kid died and it was really horrible. But if it was a 20-minute documentary, it would be amazing. It would be like...

Well, they did a class action park documentary. I remember seeing it five years before the Netflix one or the big one came out. They did a 20-minute version of it. That would be perfect. That was it. And it was on Vimeo or something. But we stretch things out now. That's what we do with things. We'll take a movie and then we're like, what if it wasn't a movie? What if it was like, it was a cinematic universe. It was 19 episodes of like, you know, and it's just like, well, how are you going to

do that? How are you going to make this presumed innocent stretch out that long? And it's just like, oh, you're just going to add a bunch of stuff. Okay. It's kind of weird. Anyways, if you get a chance to go on an extreme haunted house, don't, you know, I'd say don't try drugs instead. Have you done any of that kind of like immersive theater? Oh, I've done one where it's like different rooms and shit like that.

Or like one where they come and kidnap you? Uh, no, I mean, you know, on my birthday every year a group comes. Oh, yeah the boys Mr. Saw fence they call me I remember once in grade six I woke up my whole hockey team was in my bedroom and We were going for breakfast. It was like a surprise breakfast. It felt that way.

It felt like a kidnapping. That's funny because you know, you hear it like you're thinking, I'm thinking hazing. Yeah, you know, I was thinking like, oh, and it turns out it's just these wonderful, hey, Dave, breakfast time. We went over to the next kid, we all went to the next kid's house and woke him up. And it was like, uh, like, uh, you know, we were 11, there, there was no, uh, hazing allowed. Yeah. And then if this was a documentary, you would have let it know upfront, okay, it wasn't a hazing thing.

It was just breakfast. And then for an hour, it's kind of like, well, and Dave liked breakfast and there was different, uh, he would eat different things at different breakfasts and whatnot. He wanted to know the hours of the restaurant that served the breakfast. Something happened in the kitchen. Are they out of eggs? No, there's another box. And then I was like, that's where it seemed

like it could get good. Yuck. That usually happens. Yeah, there was one I watched about von Dutch, like hat. I remember that. It was such a big thing for such a short time. Those hats, they were so popular for such a short time. It was crazy.

And there was a guy, the guy is von Dutch. He designed the logo or whatever. He's like a surfer dude. And he designed the logo ages ago and then somebody put it on a hat and the rest is his. And Ashton Kutcher wore it while he punked someone. Christian Audigier or something, right? Had something to do with it or am I wrong? Is that a difference? Is that affliction? I don't know. Which is what? Who had something to do with it?

Christian Audigier? Christian Audigier or whatever. Well, I don't know. He was affliction and maybe Ed Hardy? Yeah, maybe Ed Hardy. Maybe that's what I'm thinking of I forget all those sort of brands from that time get mixed up. Yeah I feel like it's unfortunate that the one time there was kind of outfits for guys that were sparkly and

You know that that's that's the only kind of outfit. It was was this kind of macho idiot I think that's the only way guys would do it. Guys were just like, hey, we'll do the sparkles, but we're gonna do it real manly. Like, you know, we ain't gonna do no sissy sparkles. So it was kinda like, all right, we'll do the sparkles. Okay, we'll do the sparkles, if you insist. I think maybe in the future,

when we're all kind of like robots. Yeah. I'll be a mostly robot police officer. Should we move on to some overheards? Yeah, man. Jackie Cation, hi, and welcome to the MaximumFun.org podcast. The Jackie and Lori Show where we talk about stand-up comedy and how much we love it and how much it enrages us. We have a lot of experience and a lot of stories and a lot of time on our hands. Check us out.

It's one hour a week and we drop it every Wednesday on maximumfun.org. Hello, Podcast Recommendation Service. Hello there, young man. I'm looking for a new podcast to listen to. Something amusing, perhaps. Oh, what about Beef and Dairy Network? Something surreal and satirical. Well, I would suggest Beef and Dairy Network. Ideally, it would be a spoof industry podcast for the beef and dairy industries.

Yes, Beef and Dairy Network. Maybe it would have brilliant guests such as Josie Long, Heather Ann Campbell, Nick Offerman and the actor Ted Danson. Beef and Dairy Network! I don't know, I think I'm going to stick to Joe Rogan. The Beef and Dairy Network podcast is a multi-award winning comedy podcast and you can find it at maximumfun.org or wherever you get your podcasts. Overheard.

Overheard's where you hear it, we want to hear it, we want to talk about it. We always like to start with the guest. Chris, do you have an overheard? I do, thankfully. This one goes back a little ways. That's great. So I, one time, the first time I was on here, I think I talked about the BC Lions, the CFL.

We talked a lot of CFL stuff. Well, guess what? In Canada, we're doing a different kind of football now and it's with the U it's football. And I have season tickets now to the white caps, the Vancouver white caps are in the MLS. So this is soccer for the, for people who not following football with the U. Football, football, football, but yeah, soccer, as some

people call it. But yeah, it's really, they're getting quite good as well. They just picked up Stuart Armstrong, designated player from Southampton, really big signing for them. But this was a last year. I know I was at a game and I have pretty good seats and I just realized that doesn't have anything to do with the story. I just put it in there. Just a little bragging in there. Yeah, I just bragged it. It's not really, but yeah, there was somebody, a guy and a girl sitting two rows in front

of me, but there was no one in between and it wasn't that full and I could hear their conversation. So I heard them say a lot of things, but the thing that really stuck out was the girl asked him what happens if it's tied at the end of the game, and then he said, it goes to extra time. Let's see, this wasn't a knockout fixture. This wasn't a knockout fixture. It wasn't a friendly.

This was a league and MLS league match. So he was entirely wrong. 100% that it's not what happens at all. And so I was just fucking, and it's hard for me. I'm like, you know, to not go full man's blame mode as well, you know? Like it is kind of hard. Like it's not my place to step in there and be

like, actually dude, you know, that's, that's a terrible move, but I was sort of thinking like what happens if it, if it does dude, you know, that's, that's a terrible move. But I was sort of thinking like, what happens if it, if it does draw, you know, and then he's going to get exposed. Luckily for him, that was not his day to get exposed to one final for the white caps. And so he lived another day, um, being dishonest. I don't know why he didn't just say that he doesn't know. Right.

being dishonest, I don't know why he didn't just say that he doesn't know. Right. But that's something, there was like a sociological article that I read years ago that men feel the impulse to think that they need to know everything. Yeah. And not to say, oh yeah, I know, I saw that. I read that also.

Yeah, I read it a little bit earlier than you, I think. Actually, is that the one I wrote? That might be the one I wrote. That is absolutely true, though. I find myself doing that all the time. As I get older and more aware, I'm like, yeah, wait, you don't know anything about that. Why the fuck are you talking about that? But yeah, the real difficult part was biting my tongue and not, you know, showing him up in that moment and saying like, whoa. Listen asshole. Oh, did I not get some kind of memo?

Is there, have they changed the rules? Imagine doing it in that kind of way too. Like, hey, sorry to bother you. Did they change the rules? Because I'm just looking, I have the page up here from the MLS website and. You cause a divorce. That's the final straw.

I think they were on a date, I believe. It felt like, okay. And they're already getting divorced, shit. Yeah, yeah, shit. Now it happens more and more, you know. Do you guys find it hard to keep to overhear things yourselves? I Don't walk around with any

Earbuds or anything. So I'm constantly I'm in the collecting phase. So There's always something there's always something sometimes it's not the best but There's only feel like there's only something Dave. I assume it's the same thing. You hear stuff all over the place. I mean, you've got kids too, which helps. I'm about to give you an overheard that is garbage. So imagine if my overheard was like, imagine I was like so, I was like my overheard's like, my son said the cutest thing.

And it's just like, come on, man. cutest thing. Somebody did say that they were an anti-natalist. Do you know what that is? What does that mean? I don't know. They don't like children. Somebody commented on the podcast that like, and I don't talk about my kid very much. I'll bring it, you know, I have a newborn, so I bring it up. You could have fooled me. Well, yeah, no, you're right. I have brought it up a lot today. Um, but somebody said like, you know, I just don't like when Chris brings up the, uh, his

kid, you know, cause I'm an anti-natalist and they seemingly were being serious. Like they just hate it. Like nothing against me, but I just hate the talk, like people talking about children. Yeah. What's with children? Soon they're gonna be given their own hospitals.

Oh. They're gonna have their own schools. Yeah, their own speed zones and whatnot. Dave, you haven't overheard. Yeah, I mean, it's an overseen. So I was in the grocery store and I was in the cereal aisle. Which grocery store?

Can I know that? Oh, honestly? So I have a post office box in Blaine, Washington. Oh. So I went down to Blaine and they now have a new IGA in Blaine. Oh, okay. I went to the IGA and I was like, oh, let's see if they have any

interesting cereals. Yeah. What did you find? Well, they had, well, they had cinnamon mini wheats for one thing. Oh, yeah. And so I got some of those. But then as I was in the aisle, I saw that they had not fruity pebbles, not cocoa pebbles, they had berry pebbles. Good for you. And these had, on the box, it's got the three women from the Flintstones. It's got Wilma, Betty, and young pebbles. Pebbles, yeah. And on the bowl it says, celebrating women who rock. Nice.

And it works for their brand, too. Yeah, that. Yeah, that's rock and stone. That's great Yeah, so I just thought that was funny cuz it's that's that's really low really low effort Sort of you know, like I get it. That's nice, you know, it is nice But it just that doesn't feel like but like is it a feminist serial or is it like a failed tie-in for Lilith Fair? Mmm, yes. It's the, yeah, the collectible Lilith Fair. Is Lilith Fair still going? No.

No, but it's, uh... When did it stop? Lilith Fair was such a, was such a big part of my life. I never went to it or heard it, but I just remember hearing the name a lot. It was in the 90s. It was a big, like, you know, it was, it's one of these things where it's like, it's insane that it doesn't still exist because it fulfills, like an audience is there for it and that audience hasn't gone away.

What kind of audience? I don't know. Mostly men, you know, a real man's man kind of things, single guys, single dudes. Oh, I get it. This was, I see. Oh, it was like a, it was like a feminist festival. It was like- Yeah, it was all women. It was all women, okay. See, I genuinely didn't know that.

I wasn't trying to, you know. Oh, okay. Yeah. So it only happened four times. Wow. It's crazy that it made such an impact. It happened 97, 98, 99, and then 2010. 2010.

They brought it back. Yeah. And that was all, it was created by Sarah McLaughlin was the instigator of Lilith there. Yeah. And still saddest song that you can possibly put over a dog adoption commercial. She'll take all comers. It's the saddest song. Try and find one sadder. I dare you.

Everybody hurts is pretty sad, but yeah, hers is still number one, I think. Yeah. And like the, I was on the train this weekend and I think pink was in town because there was many women. I went to the white caps game and there were a lot of overlap as we were trying to all get to our, you know, we were trying to, well, we were trying to both get to our, for those of you who don't know the stadiums are right beside each other and so it was, I, yeah, it was very, very

noticeable that pink was in town. Very easy to tell. Yeah. Very easy to tell. Very. But I feel like this, this group of, I didn't see any guys wearing pink shirts. It was almost entirely women. Did anyone accidentally end up at the soccer game? Yeah. They would. And they were like, where's, where's the silks? She's going to descend at any moment. I know that this will just wait patiently. She's kind zip down from the room. Yeah, they waited it out the whole game to it Playing soccer so you better get the soccer started. Pink is so popular though Do you know what I mean? Like it's really crazy cuz pink was so popular You know back a long time ago as well and her staying

part because the audience was young. It was like a really young audience that looked like, you know, that were going out to her shows. I mean, I don't know the music she's making now, but she seems to be doing really well for herself. Yeah. My kids are really into her because, well, when Abby was pregnant, we used to put headphones on the stomach and play pink.

You would play exclusive Lady Marmalade. Ooh, Lady Marmalade. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but only the pink part, yeah. Just keep repeating it, repeating it. Something's wrong, your child is into the Lil' Kim verse, which is the universe of Lil' Kim. Okay, go ahead, Graham. My overheard was said to me, I was at the movie theater, and the movie theater,

I went to buy a soda, and the guy said, you know our ice machine broke so we don't have any ice. So I said, can I go and pick something up and bring it in? Like, am I allowed to do that? He just said, we don't even care anymore. They said it. Yeah, they said it. Yeah. Where was that? That was at like a chain?

That was at a chain theater? I'm not going to dox what chain has told, said on record that they don't enforce their soda policy. Was it the only chain theater in Canada? Well, there's two. There's Landmark as well. And then there's also the one that Graham's talking about. Yeah.

That's the one I'm talking about. It wasn't an independent theater. Yeah. No, it wasn't. And I'm obsessed with movies and I have this sickness I have to ask what movie you were watching at the movie theater. Oh, it was Beetlejuice Beetlejuice I haven't seen it yet. I heard it's a fun fun movie though. It's a romp. Yeah, you know, it's like All the stuff that you liked in the original get ready to see it again

And it's tons of fun. Yeah, it heard it's fun definitely. Bring a warm soda. Yeah, bring a warm soda. Bring a piping hot soda, I would say. Really put it in a thermos. I really have to pick my movies now that I go out to. But I saw, you know. Oh, why? Uh, no reason.

Just perils of life and whatnot. Trying to balance all of the different responsibilities I have unnamed. Oh, what kind of responsibilities? Unnamed. Huh. Because I have certain, I'm anti something. Are you?

Yeah, I saw, listen, I just want to give a recommendation on a streaming movie, Rebel Ridge. I don't know if you guys have heard of it, but it is. I forget what the director's name He's the director who did blue ruin and green room. Oh, I just read about it today. Yeah, he's Jeremy sound Yeah, that's right. Jeremy sonner and it's Aaron Pierre starring in it and it is Properly fucking good. You watch that movie, you know if you're at home guys been going to too many soccer games It's proper good is this it's, this is proper, proper stuff here.

Now we also have Overheard sent him to us. Oh, he made a green room. I like green room. Yeah, green room is good. Green room is a gnarly movie. Lurun's like one of my top 10, I love that movie. Is he gonna do the whole rainbow? Yep.

This one's called Red Rebel. He was like Sophia Stevens. He was going to do it, but he gave up after two. Sophia Stevens would have done so much better. He just picked seven colors to do albums of it. Yeah. He honestly, like, it was too much for him. I understand.

He bit off more than he could chew, and he didn't know what to do. Now, weard sent into us by people all over if you want to send one in set in into SPY at maximum fun Org and the first one comes from Sam in Menlo Park. Don't know where Menlo Park is somewhere California maybe California. I was at a concert I was standing next to two girls who I overheard because they were having a loud conversation throughout the entire I was standing next to two girls who I overheard because they were having a loud conversation throughout the entire show. Chompers! Fucking Chompers!

Wow! Chompers, absolutely Chompers! During a break between songs, one said, My dad is such a serial monogamist, and her friend quickly responded, No way, your dad is such a slut! Do either of you aspire to be a slutty dad? No! Oh, okay, alright. No, either of you aspire to be a slutty dad? No. Oh, okay. I don't want to be, I don't want my, I don't want, I, listen, I'm, I'm will not slut shape. There's nothing wrong with being a slut, but I don't want my son to see me as a slut.

You know what I mean? No, well, not, you know. I don't want him to like, Oh, my dad, he's a slut. You know what I mean? I just don't think. You know, my dad's something of a slut. Yeah. On career day. Yeah. My dad, he's a slut. You know what I mean? I just don't think. You know, my dad's something of a slut. Yeah, on career day.

Yeah. He chose that. He chose him and two of his friends and they're gonna show you exactly what he does at work. Ha ha ha ha. This next one comes from, sorry, sorry, Sam M from Iowa. I'm a serial monogamous as well, but mostly with, uh, pretty fellow.

The women's rock edition, particularly, um, get Bruce. Absolutely get Bruce. A very short overheard from my time this summer in a small town in Michigan. In a coffee shop, I overheard just a part of a conversation between me while my headphones were quiet. A woman said, he does reggae, but he's Christian, so he does Christian reggae. Oh, nice. Yeah, there's a big audience for, you know, if you do Christian something, like Christian comedians and stuff, there's like ones we don't you know, if you do Christian something, like Christian comedians and stuff, there's like ones that we don't know them, but they're so successful because

there's this huge Christian audience. I know one. I know a Christian comedian and he could not be busier. Like I think every weekend for years he has planned in advance. Is he a Canadian comedian? Yeah. Yeah. I think I know who you're talking about. I'm not going to say who it is, but I think I know because I think that I've come across his stuff and I know recognize his name, you know, from doing comedy and I'll come across it when I'm like looking at Drybar comedy or try. Yeah. Absolutely. It's the same. Totally. So I know who you're talking about. I think he was on Mike Huckabee. I'm not even

joking. I think he did the Mike Huckabee show, which is, I do a stream where we watch the Mike Huckabee show called Huck Watch and we watch Christian comedians and stuff. Yeah. I was on my Instagram, I was scrolling and something came up with like a young woman said, what if we turned Espresso by Sabrina Carpenter into a worship song? And it was just like, just changed all the words to Espresso to being about Jesus. And then I was trying to tell Abby about it and I was like, oh yeah, let me find it. And so I Googled it and there's so many people who have changed the words to espresso to be about Jesus.

Yeah, it's like an industry. It's like, but they're like Weird Al, Christian Weird Al. Christian Weird Al, now that's something I can get behind. It's like what Weird Al does for food, they do for Jesus. Yeah, what about a parody, but if it was like instead of the the funny stuff it just had like Jesus stuff. Yeah stuff. Yeah, he's gonna like save us and like, you know, yeah positive stuff about him Well, it is great. We want to be speaking positively about him in the sauce This last one comes from Toby from Huntsville, Ontario

This last one comes from Toby from Huntsville, Ontario. Elderly lady talking to a barista. I just got back from Newfoundland. Barista, oh, how was Newfoundland? Elderly lady, I can't get over how they talk. She sounded a little angry when she said this, and I was expecting her to say something slightly offensive, but it was quite the opposite. The elderly lady said, it's such a sexy language.

Ooh. Wow, so she's totally lost, it sounds like a sexy language. Oh, wow. So she's totally lost. It sounds like this lady. I mean, yeah, she doesn't know what a language is. I mean, that is a it's obviously I guess. I don't know. I guess it could be depending on the kind of person you are.

It could be sexy like shant like see like, you know, like the guy's kind of like a fisherman. Sure. I mean, they got some rough hands compared to us. Oh, you can mean they're pulling a rope with lobster traps and shit like that Holy shit shake their hand. You got to go to the doctor after the oh there was if you guys like fly over on Air Canada, their safety video is People doing things in different provinces all over Canada and one of them is a fisherman guy and I'm just like boy that guy's how do they find somebody that much of a man to

do something so stupid as a uh you want to hear something wild as a my uncle is a fisherman like full-on salmon fisherman captain of a fisherman boat has been doing it since he's 16 years old and yeah like like he his parents died when he was a teenager and he became a fisherman and bought the house, the child that I was for his family and they still have it. Wow. Yeah. And he's just like a, yeah, like a full time he's retired now, but he was his whole

life, 45 years doing like full hardcore fishing out. Yeah. Wow. I want a documentary about him. That's what I want to, no more. His politics aren't great. Yeah. Wow. I want a documentary about him. That's what I want. Yeah, no more politics aren't great. Oh Sure. Sure. Oh I only want to see documentaries about people who I agree with. Yeah, of course

Yeah, like that guy at the haunted house. He's the I agree with him on everything Yeah Well in addition to overheards that are written in, we also accept your phone calls. And if you want to call us, our phone number is 1-844-779-7631. That's one. Ugh. Spy pod one.

Hey, let me write this down for a potential prank in the future. No, don't. Don't do it. These people have. Hey, Dave Graham and guests. I'm calling with an overheard from an old episode of Forensic Files I watched the other night. Long story short, they solved this case and put the murder away because they found some

keys and a locksmith helped them figure out the apartment of the guy it belonged to. And one of the officers was saying, man, I bet those officers just wanted to kiss that locksmith or maybe more. Whoa. Off I go. Maybe more. Maybe a little reach around or something. Maybe they want to fuck the locksmith.

That seems a weird thing to say. Well, it helps to solve a crime. Yeah. Yeah, that's worth a little bump, a little tickle, you know? I think you'd also have to be horny and in the mood as well. I mean, putting bad guys away gets me in the mood. Oh, that's true. You're going away for a long time, but first I want to just Let me look at that ass as you walk just let me yeah, I just got the finish up with the locksmith

What do I owe you? I love to watch you go and I love to watch you leave Yeah shit man, I mean locksmiths is their own that's probably their own kink. I bet you there's guys out there That's there's key guys. There's got to be key guys. Oh, yeah, I mean, yeah, there's of course key parties What anyway, no key parties but like people who are obsessed with like picking locks or Harry Houdini Yeah, there's a great Like what's his name? He's like the lock picking lawyer or something. And he's got a YouTube channel. He's like, oh, yeah, no, we just got the new locks just dropped this season.

I'm going to get in all of them. This one sucks. Yeah. That's what I've realized doing the podcast too, is that like, yeah, there is just like anything you can think of there's just, we just got so many people kicking around these days that it's just, you know, and access to everything is so easy that you'll find guys for everything, the craziest stuff. And the, like, I have to tell myself when something comes across my screen and I'm like,

oh, this is an expert telling me about locks or whatever, I have to remind myself, you don't care. If this was a TV, if I had like a TV guide, I would never choose this channel. But because it's already on my screen, I'm like, oh, interesting. Yeah, you should look into this. All right, next phone call. Hi, so I live in Cambridge, Massachusetts, and I just had a weird overheard while on the walk. This guy on the cell phone was talking to somebody, and he said, well, I was taking

a picture of me and Mary Rose eating breakfast sandwiches when I thought the relationship was going well. I don't know. Maybe that's not as funny as I thought it was. Okay, bye. She really gave up on it there. Yeah, I do like that. I like the idea of sort of saying it and then hearing it out loud and sort of going like,

well, I don't really have the bite that I was looking for. That's a very good- I mean, that's how people get to kind of feel like they're a guest on the show. Yeah, that was honestly like, I gotta say kudos to you because yeah, the fact that you sort of had that revelation in the middle and realized that it shows, you know, that you're-

It shows character. It shows character and I think what you ought to do is you ought to go out there tomorrow and try to hear something else, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Give it another go. I liked it. I liked the overheard itself. Oh, you're the I liked it guy in it.

I'm actually in favor of it. They were having breakfast sandwiches when they realized that it's honestly going well better than the other one No, it wasn't a terrible overheard. It was a bit silly and a bit funny But yeah, I I don't think that we have no one you need to have I look You need to have the courage of your convictions. You need to believe in yourself if you're going to do an overheard. Yeah. Say, actually, this is funny. This isn't just some stupid thing I saw in a, uh, you know, IGA and blame Washington. I understand. You know, it's easier to ask for forgiveness than it is for. I understand, but it just, I feel like I appreciate them showing that, that they've realized it wasn't as good.

If they had have just said it and been like, this is a really good one, I would have been like, they don't even know it's good. They don't know it's good. None of the callers ask for permission or forgiveness. That's not part of this. Well, it's easier to ask. So I don't think asking for forgiveness

is particularly easy. Yeah, it's easier than asking for permission. I mean, it's easier. I don't wanna's a little less... I mean, it's easier. I don't want to ask for either. I just want to get away with it. Yeah, I want people to think I'm dumb enough that I didn't think of either. And there it is. If it's not easier to ask for forgiveness than it is to ask for permission,

then why did Richard Lett tell me that when I started stand-up comedy 12 years ago. Richard Lett, a legendary figure in Canadian comedy. Basically, everybody who does comedy knows who he is. Yeah, he's a slam poet as well. And he had a documentary made about him as well. And here's your final phone call. Hello, Dave Graham and possible guest. I just want to share it over her. Oh, hello, Dave Graham and possible guest is want to share it over her. I was walking around my neighborhood in the sidewalk and there's two kids in front of me. And they turned around or one of them separated and went home and the other one turned around and he said, hey, can I ask you a question? I'm like, sure. He's like, do you smell what the rock is cooking?

And I really didn't know what to say, but I just said no. And we both just awkwardly walked away. Oh, by the way, this is Jeremy from Oxford, Florida. Florida, okay. Away I go. It's off I go, by the way. Ah, not away I go. And I actually think it's away I go.

Away I go. Do you guys know what the rock is cooking? I don't. Does anybody have a lead on this? Do I know what it is or do I smell what it is? Yeah, can you smell it and therefore do you know it? Well, as far as I'm concerned, he's cooking up a little bit of desperation nowadays. That's right. His career is kind of tanking at the moment.

The rock not as hot as he used to be. He had the Black Adam film really did him in and he got really pathetic online and he started sharing a bunch of like news articles. They're like, it's actually not that bad. Like, and he's like, see, look, like this one guy thought it was like pretty good. And he just wouldn't accept that it was bad. And I think people are sort of tired of the rock.

You know, we've had enough. I also love the thing that a lot of movies do. They show the quote super gigantic says like, what a thrill ride. And then you read down the tiny place and it's like movie kitten.com and you're like, well, who the fuck is that? Wait a second. Yeah, you got it. Yeah.

Yeah. It's got to be Ebert or Roper or else I don gotta, yeah, it's gotta be Ebert or Roper or else I don't care. It's gotta be Ebert or Roper, absolutely. My kids used to, like, they're very interested in this idea of fame. And so they, I remember they used to ask me, like, who's the most famous person in the world?

And a couple of years ago, my answer would be, probably The Rock. And now when of years ago, the my answer would be probably the rock. And now when they ask me, I say, Jeremy Solnyay, the director of rebel ridge, or I think the most famous person I'm trying to think of who it actually is. I mean, maybe would not be Taylor Swift, Taylor Swift, or maybe like still messy and Ronaldo, maybe like, I do sort of feel like we are discounting India and China and there are billions of people who maybe don't care about. I will say that at least in India,

they are hugely into footy in India and they like idolize those. So they would be famous. I don't know if China in China it's as big, but yeah, like those are worldwide stars. Taylor Swift probably is too though, right? Yeah, I feel like you would know even if you didn't really know who she was, you would know, like I feel like at some point in time, it was like Michael Jackson, everybody in the world knew

Michael Jackson. If you never. Yeah, he was, he was the most, but that, yeah, there is a lot of people now. It was easier to be like the clear cut most famous person in the world before, you know? Now there's a lot of famous people, like a lot of them. Yeah. I always, I could always tell you who the people's princess is though, that's Lady Di. And I could tell you where I was when I found out the news.

I was driving in Salt Spring Island with my dad when I found out that our wonderful queen, our, wait, princess had died. And then also the queen has died though, as well. Yeah, two big famouses. She is, and she was really, you know, she was very, very, almost dead in public for a while, which was kind of scary, you know, because she was so old,

but they have to kind of bring her out, you know what I mean? For certain things, and it became kind of obvious. But rest in peace. I also would like to say where I was when I heard the lady Diana passed, or Princess Diana rather, was my friend and I were just sitting down to watch Leprechaun Three

and we were just about to start it and his dad came in the room and said, turn on the news news We never got to watch that movie. I remember that very distinctly Really? They like because it was it was unfolding in real time, you know, she hadn't died but there was a crash Yeah, there was all this speculation. The whole time I was like, when are we gonna get back to Leprechaun? Did you ever see Leprechaun 3? No. Wow.

No, I've never seen it. That is the rented movie. This was wasted money It's unc. Wow. No, I've never seen it. As the rented movie, this was wasted money. Yeah, this is some cost. Leprechaun, he's probably the most famous in the world. Everybody knows Leprechaun. Yeah, yeah, yeah. At one point.

Or their local variation. At one point. Well, that brings us to the end of this episode. Chris, thank you so much for being a guest. This is so much fun. Oh, I listen. I've said it before. You guys, I love you guys.

I look up to you. I started comedy and you guys were already so funny and good. And you're one of the first podcasts I ever listened to. So it's always a pleasure. You said that before? Yeah, I've said it many times. I mean, mostly I'm alone at my house when I'm saying it, nobody's around, but I'm saying it regularly.

He's saying it. Oh, cool. So your new podcast, Guys, you can get it on any and all streaming services. Just look for Guys with Brian Quinby. It's easier to search that way because obviously Guys doesn't do so well in the SEO, you know? Oh yeah, that's true. So yeah, Guys with Brian Quinby, but you'll find it. And yeah, Not Even a Show on YouTube, youtube.com slash not even a show, new episodes every

week and then yeah, we're doing our live show October 11th and 12th, which is both of those. I'm doing one live NEAS and one live guys. And it's, and also are your pals and ours Block and ours, uh, block party is also in the mix. Yeah, they're, it's a block party weekend, top three weekend it's called. We did one last year. Um, and yeah, it's a lot of fun. I think they sold passes for all of the shows. And so there's not that many tickets left for individual shows, but there's some left definitely. And I'd love to have some Vancouver people come out, hang out, you know? Hell yeah.

And I just want to say that I woke up this morning with a cold and we had to reschedule our whole recording. And, you know, we moved to Zoom and you came in last minute and we are eternally grateful. Yeah. I mean, the timing of it was so good. I'm so busy right now. So, but then I have the thing coming out and I was just like, oh man, I like need to be going on podcasts and telling people that my new season's coming out and about the live show and stuff. So this is perfect.

And yeah, you guys, like I said, uh, I would talk to you guys no matter what, really, even if it wasn't on a podcast, if you asked me to come hang out, I would do it anytime. Not interested. Well, there it was. I tried, I tried. I thought maybe that was the moment when we could take this off pod perhaps. You got to shoot your shot. Graham, just wrap it up.

Well, thank you everybody for listening to the show. Also to plug, every week in October at Little Mountain Gallery, I'm gonna be running the Laugh Gallery Thursday nights at 7.30pm. And that, if you play your cards right, show up for that show. You'll be home in bed by 9.45pm, so check it out. And thank you for listening everyone. You know what? Don't do a scary haunted house this Halloween, just go collect

for UNICEF. And come on back next week for another episode of Stop Podcasting Yourself. Maximum Fun, a worker-owned network of artist-owned shows, supported directly by you.