Stuff You Should Know - Short Stuff: Parachute Emergency!

Episode Date: May 26, 2021

Your parachute won’t open – now what?! Listen up to Josh and Chuck and you may make it out of this in one piece. Learn more about your ad-choices at https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hey, I'm Lance Bass, host of the new iHeart podcast Frosted Tips with Lance Bass. Do you ever think to yourself, what advice would Lance Bass and my favorite boy bands give me in this situation? If you do, you've come to the right place because I'm here to help. And a different hot sexy teen crush boy bander each week to guide you through life. Tell everybody, yeah, everybody about my new podcast and make sure to listen so we'll never, ever have to say bye, bye, bye. Listen to Frosted Tips with Lance Bass on the iHeart radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Hey, and welcome to the short stuff. I'm Josh and there's Chuck and Dave's here in spirit. So

with short stuff, let's get it started. I know we've talked about whether or not you have skydiven, skydived, dove, dived. Yes, all of them. And I think that you have, right? Didn't you do a tandem jump? I did one time and it was, I think I said before, and I'll say it again, I blacked out the first, like, second or two out of just sheer terror. Yes, I've never blacked out from terror before, but I did that time. And overall, you did it and you were okay with it or were you, when you got to the bottom, you were like, that was actually awesome. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, absolutely. But I wouldn't do it again. There was a period where I would have and then Yumi was like, no, I've done it too. We've both done it. Let's just leave it at that and not press our luck. Yeah,

I still have not. And I was thinking about it today. And I'm not scared to or anything. I don't have a problem with heights. I think it could be fun, but I'm also just kind of like, yeah, why bother? There's a lot at stake now. Well, yeah, that's, yeah, that's one of those, like, early 20-something things. That's when it's best to do. But then there's plenty of people who are like, I'm a middle-aged skydiver, been doing it forever. The key is to never jump 1,000 times. You just need to jump 999 times and just stop right there, apparently. Yeah, because if you ask Ron Bell, who is a certified USPA, United States Parachute Association member, I guess. I don't know what they're called. Dude. Jumper. Dude. He's made 13,000 jumps and

had 14 malfunctions. And he said that's about on target, about one in a thousand jumps. Something could go wrong. But part of the reason for this episode is that doesn't mean certain death just because there is a malfunction. No, there's a lot of ways that your parachute could malfunction. And it basically has everything to do with your chute not deploying correctly, which the appropriate thing to say when your chute doesn't come out is chute. Oh, chute. Terrible. Thanks. So you're going about 120 miles an hour just to put this into perspective. That, by the way, is terminal velocity. After falling for 12 seconds, a human being won't travel faster than that, no matter how far they're falling. Charlie Sheen taught us all that. He totally did.

Back in the 90s. Can you imagine how much cocaine he was on when he was filming that movie? It must have been mind boggling. Tiger blood. Like literally mind boggling. So you're traveling 120 miles an hour straight toward the earth and your chute doesn't go out as it should. And there's a lot of different things that can happen with what's called a partial malfunction. And a partial malfunction means the chute tries to deploy, but something happens to keep it from deploying correctly. Absolutely. So there's typically something like your line getting messed up, where the chute comes out okay, but the two sets of lines on either side of the chute might get kind of wound up, kind of like how when you were a kid and you spun around on a

swing set, the chain would twist up above you. That same thing frequently can happen when you're parachuting. Fortunately, it's kind of easy to do. You just kind of twist the other way, and it'll untwist just like with the swing set. The key though is to not go out of your mind with fear and forget how to turn one way or the other. Yeah, I think don't panic is the number one rule of all of this stuff. Was that a Hitchhiker's guide reference? No, I mean, yeah, plus general life. Okay, good. As long as it was in there somewhere, it's good. Yeah, so that's called a line twist. The other partial malfunction is known as a line over, which means that your chute tries to deploy and maybe does deploy, but one of the lines has crossed over where the chute is.

And so the chute is sort of, if you can imagine a parachute with one of the lines kind of running through it instead of where it should be, which is dangling down from it, then you've got a parachute that's sort of working, but not like it should. No, and that can be a real problem when your main chute doesn't open. But luckily, people who jumped out of planes plenty of times have figured out that it might help if you have a second chute. And we're going to talk all about that second chute and how it probably will save your life after this message. What do you think? Sounds great. Well, now when you're on the road driving in your truck, why not learn a thing or two from Josh

and Chuck? Get stuff you should know. All right. This I promise you, seriously, I swear, and you won't have to send an SOS because I'll be there for you. And so my husband, Michael, um, hey, that's me. Yep. We know that Michael and a different hot sexy teen crush boy band are each week to guide you through life step by step. Not another one. Kids relationships life in general can get messy. You may be thinking this is the story of my life. Just stop now. If so, tell everybody, everybody about my new podcast and make sure to listen. So we'll never, ever have to say bye, bye, bye. Listen to Frosted Tips with Lance Bass on the iHeart radio app, Apple podcast or wherever you listen to podcasts. I'm Mangesh Atikala. And to

be honest, I don't believe in astrology. But from the moment I was born, it's been a part of my life. In India, it's like smoking. You might not smoke, but you're going to get second hand astrology. And lately, I've been wondering if the universe has been trying to tell me to stop running and pay attention. Because maybe there is magic in the stars, if you're willing to look for it. So I rounded up some friends and we dove in and let me tell you, it got weird fast. Tantric curses, major league baseball teams, canceled marriages, K-pop. But just when I thought I had a handle on this sweet and curious show about astrology, my whole world came crashing down. Situation doesn't look good. There is risk to father. And my whole view on astrology, it changed. Whether you're a

skeptic or a believer, I think your ideas are going to change too. Listen to Skyline Drive and the iHeart Radio App, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts. Okay, Charles. So your main shoot is deployed and not functioning. Either you've got a line cross that won't undo, you've got a line over, or in some cases, your shoot just hasn't deployed at all. What do you do, big shot? What do you do? Well, that's called a total malfunction. If your shoot just doesn't come out or doesn't open at all, it's a complete failure. You have a reserve shoot. You've always got another one in there. And the good news is that any old, well, I don't know about any old, because I'm sure they make sure the most experienced parachuters pack that

main shoot at wherever you're going. But you do not have to be a certified FAA operator to pack that main shoot. You do have to be that to pack that reserve shoot, though. Right, which is like an extra level of protection, because those people are very sober. They know what they're doing, no nonsense. Crew cuts every last one of them. And they will pack your reserve shoot very, very well. The thing is, if your reserve shoot doesn't open, this article pointed out pretty plainly, God wanted you dead. Your number was up. Yeah. I mean, reserves are not supposed to fail, because they are the redundancy, but it can be a manufacturing mistake. Whereas the chances of, or the reality is, when your other, your main shoot fails, it could just be that it was packed wrong, or that

you came out of the plane funny in your body is at a weird angle. And it sounds kind of funny to say, but if you are going to have a parachute malfunction, rather than a line over or a line cross, you are actually better off if your main shoot doesn't deploy at all, because that cuts down on the chance of your reserve shoot getting entangled with your main shoot. Totally. So if you're going to have to use your reserve shoot, it's better if the main shoot isn't deployed. But if you're worried or whatever, and your main shoot's not working, don't hesitate to deploy that reserve shoot. Just go ahead and use it. That's what it's there for. That's right. In this House of Works article, Bell is quoted as saying, when in doubt, whip it out. That is so Bell.

Funny guy. That is so Bell. So Ted Nugent, too. We had a guy put in floors at our house once, and he was a naked skydiver, and he said, and he said, one time he got blown off course. And this guy was not, there was nothing about him that made you say like, yeah, you know, I'll bet you were a pretty handsome naked skydiver. Like he was whatever. The point is, the point is, he was blown off course once, and he had to hitch a ride back, naked, except for his parachute. What's the point? I don't get the naked skydiver. He said it was very, it was a very freeing sensation, you can imagine. I mean, that's what they say about being naked doing anything.

Right. This is like wind whipping past your gentilia. Your gentilia? Yeah, it's like s'mores, it's a contraction. So the other good thing about the failsafe these days is that if you, let's say you go out of, like you, you blacked out, let's say you didn't regain consciousness, and you weren't doing a tandem jump, and all of a sudden, Josh Clark is just hurtling to the ground, passed out, you will probably still be okay, because these days they have these modern devices called automatic activation devices, AADs, and they use computerized sensors that basically say, hey, if you're falling below 1000 feet, and you're going at least 78 miles per hour, then something's wrong, and we're gonna, we're gonna automatically deploy the backup parachute,

this little computerized thing. Right. So as like you said, there, there's like, it's not a death sentence if your shoot doesn't open, there's a lot of ways that you can resolve this, but there are some instances where your shoot just doesn't open. What's crazy is that people die from those very infrequently, or I should say, taking into account all jumps, there are very few people who die parachuting. I think in 2000, 32 people died out of 2.7 million skydive jumps, and then in 2020, just 11 out of 2.8 million died, and that's not taking into account people who actually have survived these things where their parachutes just didn't deploy, and they hit the ground and they actually live, which does happen from time to time. Yeah,

and I guess just some back of the envelope math, which I'll probably get wrong, if Bell is correct, and that about one in 1000 have some sort of partial malfunction at least, that would mean out of those 2.8 million total jumps, there were about 2800 malfunctions and only 11 deaths still. Yeah, I think you're right. You know me in math too, so that was impressive. No, that one's pretty straightforward, I think. So out of the 2800-ish malfunctions, there were only 11 deaths, so your chances of surviving a malfunction are still really, really great. Yeah, so there were a couple people that kind of famously survived. There was a woman named Victoria Sillers, whose nefarious evil husband tampered with her parachute

to kill her, and she survived a drop from 4000 feet a few years back. What happened to him? He went to prison. A guy named Michael Holmes jumped 2 miles, 3.2 kilometers. That's how far he dropped to the earth without his chute deploying, but he happened to land in some Blackberry bushes and he lived. Do you feel bad for the Blackberry bushes? No, I thought that was a very sweet, nice ending, and I'm just picturing this person landing and reaching over and picking a Blackberry and enjoying it. For some reason, that all sounded like you were sympathizing with like, what the Blackberry bushes do you deserve? And now, of course, this guy's probably listening, he's like, yeah, ate a Blackberry with my stomach collapsed. Right, but then the queen of all this

Chuck, the queen champion, was a woman named Vezna Volevich, who in 1972 was a flight attendant onboard a Yugoslav air flight that they suspect had a bomb. At any case, it came apart at 33,000 feet and she trapped in the tail, pinned between the wall and or the back of the tail and or the back of the plane and a service cart dropped 33,000 feet out of the air and survived. Wow. Isn't that crazy? Wow, that is, yeah, that's startling. Can you imagine like her just shakily like putting a cigarette in her mouth and like walking away from the landing? Holy cow. Because this was Yugoslavia in 1972, there's 110% chance that she smoked cigarettes. Yes, of course, unfiltered. You got anything else, man? I got nothing else. Pull that shoot, whip it out.

And when it doesn't work, be sure to say shoot. Well, that's it for short, so far and far. We're out. Stuff You Should Know is a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts on my heart radio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.