Suggestible - Gentlemen First

Episode Date: July 5, 2019

Suggestible things to watch, read and listen to hosted by James Clement @mrsundaymovies and Claire Tonti @clairetontiFollow the show on Instagram and Twitter @suggestiblepod or visit www.planetbroadcasting.comThis week's Suggestibles:The TickCity Of GirlsGuardian Angels and Other MonstersUnder The Skin Podcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Introducing Uber Teen Accounts, an Uber account for your teen with enhanced safety features. Your teen can request a ride with top-rated drivers, and you can track every trip on the live map in the Uber app. Uber Teen Accounts, invite your teen to join your Uber account today. Available in select locations. See app for details. It's a podcast, James. Hi. We thought of a name. You thought of a name. Maybe Mason thought of a name. Mason definitely thought of a name. We didn't have a name last week. That's why we didn't say a name. You thought of a name. Maybe Mason thought of a name. Mason definitely thought of a name. We didn't have a name last week.

That's why we didn't say a name. No, now we have suggestible. That's right. And you can find us all the places. What is the show about? Tell them, James. It's just like, hey, we watched this thing. We read this thing.

We looked at this thing. Maybe one of us is making a garden. Definitely not me. It's things that we've been doing that people might be interested in. That we suggest you do. Suggest a bullying. Excellent. And my name is Claire Tonti.

My name is James Clement. I was going to tell you your name, but you said it already. That's fine with me. And we're married and we run Planet Broadcasting. And we've only got half an hour to do this. Let's get the ball rolling. As always, gentlemen's first. We've established it in our first episode.

Is that the rule? It's the rule. Cool. Okay. Let's get the best thing. As always, gentlemen's first. We've established it. Is that the rule? It's the rule. Cool. Okay, let's get the best thing out of the way first. I bet you it's going to be more sci-fi, bleak, robots digging holes. Listen, that's my second thing, but my first thing is not that. Is it AI related? The second thing is yes, not the first thing.

Space related. Everything is space related. Not as much. Anyway, the first thing. Okay,. Everything is space related. Not as much. Anyway, the first thing. Okay, I'm just going to go back just a little bit. In the 80s, a cartoonist called Ben Edlund created this character called The Tick. I hate it. No, no, just listen.

Like the insect. In 1986. That burrows into your skin. It's basically like a parody of like super strong kind of macho kind of like superhero kind of. I walked past the TV while you were watching this. Yeah, he did. The big blue insect. The big blue insect.

Yeah. It became a cartoon in the 90s for like three seasons, which I remember watching as a kid. It was really fun. And in the early 2000s, Patrick Warburton, who you know as Putty from Seinfeld, he played the tick. So this big chinned guy just stuck in this blue suit. Like, you know, it's like, hey, chum, what's happening? Let's do an adventure or whatever. And he's got this tiny little man sidekick who's in a moth costume.

He's not indestructible or bought some bounce off him. He's just in a moth suit that he can like fly around in. Okay. This is from the 80s. No, this is just the general premise. All right. Okay. A couple of years ago, they rebooted it on Amazon,

and I just started watching it. I'm a season and a bit in. It stars Peter Serafinowicz as this tick who you might know from The Voice of Darth Maul once. Yes, that famous man. He's in Shaun of the Dead. He's in Guardians of the Galaxy, but you probably most know him from Parks and Rec.

He's the British guy who they go and visit, and he's kind of like a buffoon. Oh, yeah. Yeah, he's great. He's a hilarious impressionist and storyteller and comedian. He's amazing. Anyway, he voices the tick, so he's like this lighter-than-life superhero that comes into this guy's life, Arthur,

who had this traumatic event happen to him involving superheroes, and the world's greatest supervillain basically killed his father. But then disappeared. They thought that the supervillain was dead but it kind of it's it's like a parody of superheroes but it's also a lot of the time like a very genuine attempt to make like a superhero show it's very funny and very tongue in cheek and it's cancelled there's only two two seasons uh yeah but it's it's cancelled. There's only two seasons. Oh, no. Yeah, but it's really terrific and really funny. And, look, it's not just, like, the Tick is the main character, I guess, but it's more about Arthur as the guy in the moth suit who doesn't know what he's doing, but he's smart.

So the Tick's always like, let's run in and punch justice or whatever. Is he the blue guy with the big suit? That's the Tick. That's the Tick. And Arthur's the little guy. He looks like he's in a rabbit suit. He's got, like, little rabbit ears on the top of it That's the tick. That's the tick. And Arthur's the little guy. He looks like he's in a rabbit suit. He's got like little rabbit ears on the top of it. I saw that.

And every time I walked past the television, I was like, what is he watching? Yeah. But look, I highly recommend it. Like I'd kind of avoided it for a few years. I'm like, well, I hear it's probably going to get cancelled and I'm, you know, whatever. I don't really want to jump on board.

I'm Mr. Sunday Movies. I'm too cool for this. Too cool for things. What's it called? Rewind? The Tick. Okay. Yeah, because I'm very sceptical of things.

About The Tick. That get cancelled because I get invested in them and then they go away. But, look, the first season has got a really good and solid arc and I've just started the second season. So, look, wherever it ends up, I'm kind of happy that, you know, they did make this thing. It's got a pretty decent budget on it, like the special effects. You know, it's kind of TV stuff, but it's got ridiculous superheroes

and supervillains and, like, there's one called um lobstercules and he's just okay i'm on board now i like that name he's basically a giant lobster that's strong so they're like well it's a lobster and it's hercules and when they see it in the newspaper they're like that's a fucking terrible name for a super villain okay question yeah is there any poignant moments or is it all straight no no it's all it, it's very poignant and there's like parodies of. Oh, I love that. Yeah, he's got like a sister who's, she's training to be a doctor, but she also on the side, she sews up criminals,

like who get like bullet holes in them from bank robberies or whatever. So she does this and she's got like a foot in the underworld or whatever, but they don't know that. And it's just a terrific, like it's a terrific show. It's got a great family dynamic and there's a character called, I can't remember what his name is, but he's basically like a vigilante. He's like Batman except he's got swords and he murders everybody and he's got this dark past.

Sounds like a solid boat. And he's got a boat called Danger Boat, which is a boat that he lives on, which has an AI, which basically, you know, it's like Knight Rider, but it's a boat basically. It's just ridiculous and it's really funny and it's just great. And I kind of, I've been avoiding it but I'm really glad I started watching it because it's really surprised me how fun it is. Oh, wow.

Okay, you kind of got me on board now. What kind of style would you say, like a show similar to it in comedy and kind of vibeness good omens like that recent one that we sort of talked about yeah david tennant yeah david tennant yeah i guess if you've i guess kind of deadpool but less like look at my balls like it's less like that kind of stuff all right yeah okay do you think i would like it you might yeah you might actually like it okay Okay. The tick. The tick.

It's on Amazon. There's only two seasons and then it finishes. Yes. But it's worth it. At this point, absolutely. Okay, let's keep moving on. Let's do it. We've only got half an hour.

Half an hour. Half an hour, James. All right. My first one. Oh, you're going to hate this. Here we go. You're going to hate it. Here we go.

But it's all right. It's contrast. It's high. It's low. It's lowbrow. Yeah, this is the low it. Here we go. But it's all right. It's contrast. It's high. It's low. It's lowbrow. Yeah, this is the low point. Stay with us. This is a book I'm recommending.

Yeah, I know. You probably won't read it, but maybe someone who's listening will like it. It's called City of Girls. Great title. That should be an ongoing thing. Like one person recommends something and the other person goes, ugh. Well, if you keep recommending me like AI space related things, I probably will keep going.

I'm just going to recommend The Tick again next week, all right? That's what I'm going to do. So this is the kind of caliber that I'm recommending. I'm recommending a novel called City of Girls. Very good. And your thing is called The Tick with a big blue man. Anyway, it's called City of Girls. It's by one of my favorite writers, Elizabeth Gilbert.

She also wrote Big Magic, which is another one of my favorites. Yeah, I've heard you talk about that. Yeah. She, as an author, Elizabeth Gilbert recently lost her wife. She was married and her wife had a terminal illness and passed away. And so she wrote this book while she was in one of the worst sort of head spaces of her life. And in order to kind of escape from that, she lives in New York City and she just wrote this super fun romp

about sex and girls living in New York City and showgirls. It's just, it's starring, oh, starring, the central character is Vivian Morris who's 19 and she grows up in this very well-to-do household who are all really boring and she's very different and she's the only person in her family who understands her is her grandmother. Is her dad like, you can't dance. This isn't a dancing family.

No, James, let me tell you. Well, a little bit like that. But she sort of doesn't fit in with their family except her grandmother, who's this like really kind of extraordinary kind of out there person who lived in New York City and like wears ridiculous costumes and taught her how to sew. And so she's a brilliant seamstress. Anyway, she gets kicked out of her special private school and her parents don't know what to do with her.

At 19, she was there too long. Yeah, yeah. So she gets shipped off into New York City. Her grandmother at this point had passed away. And so she's actually, the novel is really her retelling the story when she's in her 90s about all her misadventures and her kind of. So it's set in the modern day though? No, no.

So it's set in the 1940s. Oh, okay. So it's 1940s New York. Yes, okay, gotcha. And so, and Vivian Morris is in her 90s reflecting back on 1940s New York and how much fun she had in her life. During the war. During the war. During the war.

Yeah, well, it's just the beginning of the war. So initially it's sort of New York City pre-war. Well, yeah, America wasn't at war at that point either. No, it's pre-war and then it goes into what happens to New York City at that time during the war. And she goes to live with her aunt. Her grandma at this point has passed away. And so it's really just she has a lot of sex and she drinks a lot and she hangs out with

all these showgirls. And because she's such a brilliant seamstress and so great with costumes, she makes all the costumes for her aunt who runs this kind of dilapidated old theater. And then there's this brilliant character who's this woman in her fifties who's married to like a really handsome kind of dullard who's an actor, like super handsome but like no brains. Like the tick. Yeah, right, and she comes to live at this theatre and then kind of the story unfolds from there and they put on this incredible play or show called City of Girls

and it becomes, you know, it's really awesome. A hit. A hit. This sounds like something that will probably be adapted into a TV series or a movie. Oh, for sure. Yeah. It's just a romp.

And, I mean, there are dark twists and turns. Sure. But what's so great about it, I think, is that it celebrates women being free and having autonomy in a time, particularly in the 1940s, where women were very repressed. But it was also an interesting time, from what I know of history, is because a lot of men were shipped overseas. Yes.

I mean, probably not the start of this book. No, but it does happen. Yeah, but then there's that opportunity, or not even opportunity, there's like the- A necessity for women to step up. Yeah, and that kind of kicked things into gear because when people came back and then all those jobs were taken away again, it's like, well, we're clearly capable and yeah.

Yeah, and the 1950s kind of happened where women kind of- 1940s during the war, women kind of got all of this freedom. Like they wore pants and had to do drugs like mechanics. There's that poster of the woman flexing her bicep. Exactly. And then everything kind of flicked back again to like kind of Handmaid's Tale-esque where everyone's wearing those ridiculous big poofy dresses.

And so she kind of rebels against that too. Yeah, right. There's just a lot of joy in it. And New York City, she paints as such a fun and vibrant place and the showgirls are like so gorgeous and tall and like big feathers on their heads and there's these kind of really quite hilarious bumbling kind of characters that come through. And she talks about the bar scene and, yeah, it's just for anyone

who is feeling a bit the world is a bit of a scary place at the moment. I feel like that. Yeah, right. And it's just a really joyful, fun and very sexy book. Yeah. I really, really enjoyed it. I thought it was really fun. I love a sexy book.

Yeah, very sexy. The one thing I thought was interesting, and I actually wanted your perspective on this, Elizabeth Gilbert writes, and it's kind of the core of the book, about how women often have to be seen as being good and doing the right thing all the time to be a good person and to be seen as being like a good woman. I think there is, yeah, there's definitely element of that. And you just see it on the internet. If somebody does something like left of center, people are like, well, that's not very, not like becoming of a woman, but it's like, well, that's not, you know, that's not, yes yes is what i'm saying yeah you definitely say it yeah

and that and that our whole idea and elizabeth gilbert writes as vivian morris the central character that to be a good person you don't have to always be good no like you don't always have to make sensible decisions you know you can use your 20s and kind of party a bit and go a bit out there and be more free with your sexuality and still be a good person. Yeah, absolutely. You know, and you don't have to always. Those two things aren't mutually exclusive. Yeah.

And I think that's, and still I think women who basically sleep around or whatever are often viewed in, you know, like they're promiscuous. There still is a double standard. Yeah, there's definitely a double standard. Yeah, and so she explores that. Not with all people, obviously. I think it's definitely changing. But, yeah, there still is that sense of like, well, come on, like, you know.

Yeah, exactly. And also a sense too that everyone's okay with men being, you know, kind of out there with their sexuality. Like you see kind of representations of, you know, phallic representations everywhere. And it's okay for men to have sexual desires and all of that kind of thing. But I still think sometimes for women, like it's less okay for women to admit that they have urges and needs and desires.

And she kind of explores all of that in the book. Anyway, if you're a bloke, you probably won't read it. Yeah, hello if you're our son listening to this in the future. I know. Probably embarrassed about us already. Anyway, City of Girls, Elizabeth Gilbert. Check it out. Check it out.

Excellent. Okay. I read a book over the summer. This is one of the two books I've read this year, so I'm out of books for next week. And I may have talked about it on my other podcast, Mr. Sunday's the weekly sunday movies joined by some idiot dot com i think it's called number one party boy uh it's called uh guardian angels and other monsters it's by daniel h wilson and essentially it's a collection of short stories i've always loved like short stories or like

anthology tv shows where it's just one and done you know what i mean it's just they capture this world and like you know to chapter or less than and one and done. You know what I mean? It's just they capture this world in like, you know, chapter or less than and then they're on to the next thing because if you love it, it's great. You know, it's just like rip, roar and read. You know what I mean? Rip, roar and read. And if you don't like it, you're like, well,

there'll be another one in about three pages. So it doesn't really matter. Anyway, this particular novel is about the future and AI. And, you know, and AI becoming sentient and things like that. And not even, it's not always, actually, it's not always AI. But am I going to do AI every week? Yeah, because that is literally all you consume. You saw that book by Ian McKellen the other day.

Oh, not Ian McKellen. Yeah, Ian McEwan. And it was just like a weird lady robot's face staring off into the distance. It was a man and a lady robot. It was a man robot, I believe. Yeah, but it was like a seven-head staring into the distance. I didn't just buy it because it was the robot thing. But it was like, are humans robots?

Are they humans? Aye, aye. What are we? Ian McEwan is an amazing author, though. Yeah, he is. Like, Atonement's incredible. The one about the balloon is incredible. Soul is good.

I've read a bunch of them. Anyway, it doesn't matter. What about the one about he's like the fetus and he's writing the book? I haven't read that one. Nutshell. Yeah, your mum gave me that, but I haven't read that one yet. I tried to read it and I couldn't get into it. What's the fetus doing?

Just like, I can't hear anything. Yeah. I can't see or hear anything. It's just that for 400 pages. No, it's the opposite. His mother has an affair or something and so he's listening. It's like a bit creepy. That sounds bad.

Yeah, it is a bit creepy. No, anything could be good. Anyway, I'll give you some examples of some short stories. The first one is absolutely bloody cracking, mate. I'll tell you this much. It's about a girl. She's playing with her robot, the kind of nanny, right, in the near future. It sounds like I Am Mother.

It's exactly like I Am Mother. From last week. and then it just plays out like the movie i am mother so no and so what happens is uh she's it becomes clear that she's from this affluent family and then this this group bust in and they and they shoot the robot like to death and they kidnap the girl and they're out and it turns out they're on this skyscraper or whatever and the robot robot was this special combat robot that was supposed to be like bulletproof and could do fucking kung fu or whatever but it's it's down right and but what it can do it can transfer its consciousness to other machinery so what it's doing it's following the criminals across the city one point it gets in a crane and tries to stop so it's just like trying to drop things on the car as it's kind of passing it gets inside the car that they're in and like takes over the mechanics of it,

gets in like a bulldozer. So it's basically trying to stop this race between the kidnappers trying to get this little girl out of it. Hi, this is Katnett Unfiltered. If you know us, then you know that we do almost everything together. So accommodating seven kids and seven adults on vacation can be challenging.

So we Airbnb it. And if you have a spare room in your house, you can Airbnb it. It's that simple. You can even Airbnb your whole house while you are away. You could be sitting on an Airbnb and not even know it. Whether you could use extra money to cover some bills or for something a little more fun, your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host. The city, because there's less technology and he's trying to stop that happening using whatever kind of technology is along the way. I can see you're like, okay, yeah.

No, yeah, I am a little bit. But no, I do get really fascinated by futuristic stories like that. There's another friendship one about a man who's friends with a delivery robot. Yeah, all right. But my favourite one, I think, is called The Blue Afternoon That Lasted Forever, and it's basically this physicist and he's at work and he sees this anomaly in the sky on television

and he realises, because he has special knowledge of this exact thing, that it's basically the end of the world. It's a miniature black hole that has opened up in the sky on television. And he realizes that because he has special knowledge of this exact thing, that it's basically the end of the world. It's a miniature black hole that has opened up in the sky and the world is going to be done in 30 minutes and like it's over. And so it's about him rushing home and spending time with his daughter as like the world is about to collapse in on itself. Whoa. Okay.

I'm on board with that. Yeah. Would my heart be able to cope with it? Maybe, who knows? But look, the thing is it's not, they're not all like amazing and it's a bit, the thing is, they're not all amazing.

It's a bit like, oh, yeah, they're a robot. Okay. Oh, yeah, they're trapped inside a robot body. Oh, yeah, the government. Yeah, okay, I get it. Dispiracy. Yeah, but it's pretty consistent all the way through. And those ones in particular I talked about were some of my favorites.

So, yeah, Guardians, Angels and Other Monsters by Daniel Hage Wilson. How do you spell Hage Wilson? Hage Wilson, as in the letter H. Oh, Hers by Daniel Hage Wilson. How do you spell Hage Wilson? Hage Wilson, as in the letter H. Oh, H. H. H. H. Wilson.

H. I get grief about it, but I say H. It's H. Is it though? Yeah, it is. Yes, because I grew up in a household that was very particular about the way that you said things. I always got corrected.

Well, my household didn't give a shit because I'm from the wrong side of the tracks. I'm from the right side of the tracks, the the wrong side of the tracks. I'm from the right side of the tracks. The very quiet side of the tracks. I was always corrected. I had to say cow and now and dance. Now that sucks. Which I don't say anymore. Because I married to you and now I'm like cow.

Damn. Fuck. Oh, swearing. Goodness. I've already sweared on this podcast. You've sweared so many times. I guess this is a somewhat swearing podcast. So many swears.

I've really got to cut down on my swearing Yeah, you do Is that your other recommendation? You're suggestible Definitely Mason doesn't really swear at all And I think it's because First of all

His comedy brain is so clever He's a complete coward And he would never He doesn't have the confidence And the bravery Yeah, let's go with that But I think it's good Because it makes you kind of

Reach for other words And it also means that When you do use it It's like Important Emphatic Anyway, tell me How about that for a word? I don't like it reach for other words. And it also means that when you do use it, it's like important. Emphatic. Anyway, tell me.

How about that for a word? I don't like it. Let's improve our vocabulary. I don't want to do that. Our dexterity. I'm already reading books. What else do you want? All right. You've only read two.

Then you're out of books. I don't know what you're going to do for the rest of the month. It's all comics and AI to the end of the year. Comics are books. That's true. I don't know. There was a pause there. She says.

Like you disagree. You didn't even read that comic that I gave. I don't know. There was a pause there. She says. Like you disagree. You didn't even read that comic that I gave you like three years ago. I did. I did. I did. No, you didn't. I didn't get all the way to the end, but I read halfway through. It's such a good comic and it opens up.

What's it called? It's called I Kill Giants. And I think once it unfolds, you'd be like, I get it. I get it. You don't get it because you haven't read it. It's all about a girl and she's different. It's not just about that. There's more things.

We'll talk about it later. Okay, well, how about I read it and then we'll talk about it as a suggestible. I've got another suggestible. This one is a podcast called Under the Skin. It's free. It's on Luminary. So it's Russell Brand and I know you hate Russell Brand. No, you know what?

I thought about it. I don't hate Russell Brand. Okay. I just think he's like, the dichotomy of the system is in itself. It's twisted within the inherent. It's just like that kind of calm down on your big words, mate. I've got a man bun at the moment. Does he?

Yeah. So anyway, it's on this platform, Luminary, which you actually have to pay for. Yeah. It's kind of interesting. They've got a whole lot of celebs on board. This is his new podcast. They've also done some pretty dodgy stuff as far as I'm aware. Correct.

They have. This episode, however, is free. So you can, you know, it's like a gift from Luminary, so that's good. I wouldn't sign up to Luminary because they're dodgy. However, this episode is free, so that's good. Unless at some point we get signed on to Luminary, in which case all hail Luminary. And then we're all on board.

We get some sweet-ass deals. Nah, they got some big celebs, mate. You're not big enough yet. I'm a mid-tier YouTube celebrity, Claire. How dare you? Celeste Barber, who is another suggestive. Sometimes when I go into the city, I get recognized by one person. That's huge.

It's huge. Yes, you're a big old celeb now. Do you remember that time we were walking in the city and Barry, you were walking. We have a friend, Barry, who's very funny. He was telling you, it was like late. He was telling, sorry, I know you were in the middle of this. That's all right. Continue, go. We got time? We have time. Yeah. And Barry was like, you, it was like late. He was telling, sorry, I know you were in the middle of this. That's all right. Continue, go.

We got time? Yeah. And Barry was like, you're so famous, Claire. You think you're so bloody famous. And you're like, I'm not famous. I don't know what you're talking about. Nobody bloody knows me. And no one ever recognized me ever.

You're having this conversation. This guy walks past and goes, oh, hey, Claire. And Barry's like, what was that? Are you kidding me? It was like 3 a.m. It was. It was hilarious. It was after my birthday drinks last year. Yeah, what was that? Are you kidding me? It was like 3am. It was. It was after my birthday drinks last year. Yeah, it was so fun.

That was amazing because literally that never happens. So, yeah. But, yeah, we're both celebs, mate. Don't you worry about it. Mid-tier celebrities. Anyway, let's get back on to a celeb. Mid-tier internet celebrities as well, which is a different level. Correct, called Russell Brand.

Yeah. Yeah, correct. Anyway, under the Skin, Russell Brand. It's a podcast. And this episode is the one I'm recommending specifically. He interviews Brene Brown, who is one of my fave peeps. Say Rene Brown? Brene Brown.

Brene Brown. Brene Brown. Have you heard of her, James? I've heard. I don't know. It just sounds like a spelling error. All right. Okay.

She's an author and a speaker. She's brilliant. She actually has a Netflix special on at the moment she has studied for you know 20 years vulnerability and shame and she looks at parenting and she's just deep dived into what makes human beings tick she's fascinating but she's also really like funny she's texan and she's a mom she just is very very authentic and great and she talks a lot about what it means to be human and the way that we can kind of operate. And she's sober. So I think she was an alcoholic years ago.

If she wasn't an alcoholic and she was sober, I'd be like, big deal. Okay. Good on you. Anyway. And so she just talks a lot of sense. Okay. And this episode particularly, you can tell Russell Brand in his casual like, the dichotomy of the world is and I'm Trump and all that stuff.

He is fascinating too. They talk about kind of broadly about politics too. And Russell Brand actually talks really frankly about how he feels like he had a hand in the movement now that's putting people like Boris Johnson in power and also Trump because at the time he had a huge platform on YouTube. And he was doing his like whole thing about bringing down the establishment and how you shouldn't – like politicians aren't real humans and, you know, we need people who are going to actually tell it how it is.

Sure. And people – yeah. Look, I'm sure – yeah, he probably had a minor hand in it. Oh, yeah. I'm not saying sure, yeah, he probably had a minor hand in it. Oh, yeah. I'm not saying he's like got a big hand. I just mean he had like a small amount of influence in that. And people might take that as, well, these guys aren't proper. They tell it how it is and they're not real politicians or whatever.

Let's get some real people in the panel. Well, and I think also he does talk a lot about socialism and about how the inequity of wealth at the moment, which, you know, all of that stuff. Basically what he said is the night before the election in Britain, the Labor leader actually came onto his show at that time because that's how kind of fervor, ridiculousness it all got. Yeah. And he realised at that time that really he was having an influence

on the political debate and he just had like a breakdown. Yeah, right. Because he just, he said he felt like he was so full of himself and full of all this ego about it and he got really like exactly what you were saying and then he just collapsed into himself because he realized well who am I to be saying any of this and that's terrifying that kind of yeah influence anyway that was a small part of the podcast. What I found so interesting was how much Brene Brown talks about what it means to be compassionate. So she studied compassion. And I wanted to ask you this question because I thought it was really interesting. She brings it up. She said she studied compassion and why people are compassionate, how they can be more

compassionate. And over the course of her research, what she discovered was the one thing that everybody who she would ostensibly say was a very compassionate, empathetic person had in common was that they had really kind of strict boundaries about what they will and won't accept into their life. Sure, okay. And the other thing was their answer to this question. So I'm going to ask you this question that she asks. So do you believe

that people as a rule are doing the best they can? Uh, every, like in general, like every person that you run into, do you believe they're doing the best they can? I would say most people are. Yeah. To with like, you can't say yes or no. You have to say you can't be, it's not the world, is it? It's not black and white. I think people at the end of that will probably do what's best for them and people in their like immediate circle. But do you think that in general, like human beings are doing the best they can? No. Even people, even the world, like think about.

No, because the world will be better, I guess, if everyone was doing the best they can. But then you look at like who's in power and like how much influence like an everyday person, like just a mid-tier YouTube celebrity, for example. I don't know. It's a huge one, isn't it? I honestly don't know.

It's really interesting. And what she kind of discovers and she talks about with Russell Brand in this podcast is the answer to that question for people who have a lot of compassion is yes, every person they meet. She asks the people that- So what does that make me? No, well, it's just, well, no, because everyone struggles with that. It's huge.

But when you think about it, if you, every person that you run into, like think about someone in your life that is really difficult, that gets under your skin, that makes you just infuriated. Yeah, you. Yeah,ated. Yeah. You. Yeah, me. Yeah, and then think about it. Think about how differently you would feel about them if you knew that they were just doing the best that they could

with the stuff that they had. Yeah, I don't disagree with that. Yeah, I mean, it depends. Like, what do you mean by the best that they can? Does it mean, like, the best for them and their family? Do you mean best for the world? No, I mean as in they are trying their best. So even if their best is that they're treating everybody horribly,

that they're, you know, I don't know, cheating and stealing and taking a whole lot of drugs and neglecting their kids, that's the best they can do. Yeah, but that to me is not, I mean, that's not the best you can do. No, no, it's not being the best. That's not what it's about. It's them with the knowledge and skills and the ability and the way they grew up and everything. Imagine if we thought about it in that they were just doing the best that they could.

I mean, probably. Yeah. I guess so. Yeah. Isn't it interesting? She doesn't say it's right or wrong. It's not right or wrong. No, I know.

I don't think about it. Yeah. And it's really interesting what Russell Brand talks about too because it's almost easier in a way. It's about repression and the dichotomy of the system. Yeah, anyway, it's a really fascinating podcast. She also talks about the whole movement now politically. We're so opposed on right and left and yelling at each other

and how we can kind of come together. She's still trying to unpack that in herself, how we sort of can move forward through all of the big issues that we've got currently. And also they also look at that whole idea of the patriarchy and, you know, white men holding power and all of that stuff. And whether or not, you know, it's the last gasp of a power structure or whether it's actually things are moving in a different direction. It's really. That's a very. Yeah.

And then she looks at parenting. Yeah, right. We're very much in all of that at this exact point in time. It's so interesting because she's huge. Like she has so much influence. She's Texan and she has so much influence in both both camps because what she talks about isn't political it's about deep-seated things to do with who we are as people as the things that you know she studied shame what makes us feel shameful as humans and and so she has a

theory about the fact that often people are acting out or you know even trump in power or comes back to that people People are scared. They're fearful. They feel shame. They haven't been able to process their own insecurities and difficulties in their own life and that's what comes across. Anyway, I highly recommend listening to it. She also talks about really cool stuff about parenting.

There's some great stuff because Russell Brand has a two-and-a-half-year-old who's basically ruining his life and he doesn't know what to do about it and it's quite funny. My heart bleeds for him. Doesn't it? No. No, it's not ruining his life, but he's just finding it really tough and I loved the advice she gave to him about choice and about how to parent because I just felt like it would be so helpful

for anyone with a toddler like we have. Yeah, it is definitely about choice, I think, for kids, giving them options. Yeah, and also backing up what you say. So she talks about giving, if you say something, you have to follow it up. Yeah. Otherwise kids become insecure and they don't. They don't know their boundaries and they don't feel safe.

Yeah. I know, as you say it in classrooms. Yeah, all the time. Exactly. And you need to stand by what you say. And these first five years of a kid's life are, she said, in all the research she's done, and she does deep dive research, like insane levels of, you know, PhD, whatever, research,

that the first five years are just like fundamental and all that. Anyway. So don't blow it is what you're saying. Yeah, no pressure. And no one's perfect, obviously. But she said the biggest part is it's not being perfect in front of your kids. It's actually showing emotion and talking through how you feel about it and admitting your mistakes. Because if you try and live in a house where everyone has to be perfect all the time, you teach kids that there's something wrong with them.

I think also, like, and I've seen this in people that I know, like when you grow up in a house like that and then when you grow up, you see the flaws in your parents. And then you're kind of like, well, they're full of shit, aren't they? Because they're not even who they presented themselves to me as. Yeah, so I think that vulnerability and a bit of give and take is, I don't know anything about parenting. Well, I know. Well, have a listen to this podcast, Renee Brown,

and she has a Netflix special too, which is beautiful. She writes some really great books. I have heard of her. Yeah. It's probably from you, I'm sure. Yeah. She's brilliant. And she really talks about how powerful it is to exactly write,

to be vulnerable and to show yourself for who you are and admit your mistakes and talk through that with your kids. Because it's way easier to double down and go like, no, I'm right. Yeah. You know what I mean? Exactly. Rather than letting your kids see you cry. I just mean in general as Yeah. You know what I mean? Exactly. Rather than letting your kids see you cry. I just mean in general as well.

You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. Admitting fault is, yeah, it's difficult. Yeah, it's full on. The one other thing she says, and we're almost out of time, I love what she talks about, about the stories we tell ourselves. So she often says in an argument with her husband,

I'm telling myself a story. Wait, who says? Brene Brown. Oh, right. Sorry, I'm telling myself a story. Wait, who says? Brene Brown. Oh, right. Sorry, I was thinking she was married to the woman who, that was a. No, different person. Wait, what? No, Brene Brown is married.

I got you, yeah. And when she argues with her husband, they now use this thing where she says, the story I'm telling myself about, I don't know, why you didn't take the bins out is because you don't care about me. And I know that's not true. And so her husband can go, okay, well, the story I'm telling myself is that you don't think I'm good enough because you're nagging me all the time. And so then you can see how each other thinks.

The story I'm telling myself is just like, I'll just take the bins out. Just get off my back. Get off my bloody back, mate. Stop nagging. Women are so naggy. All right. We're done. That's the end.

Is it? Oh, gosh. People want, got things to recommend. Tweet it in at? Suggestible Pod. At Suggestible Pod. Yep. Also at Claire20 and at Mrs. Sunday Movies and at Claire20.

That's for me. And who are you? Mr. Sunday Movies on all platforms. All of them. Yeah. Including my podcast, Mr. Sunday Movies and some guy. Another weekly planet. Correct.

Exactly. And I'm on Instagram. So you can find me at Claire Tonti at SuggestiblePod across Twitter and Facebook and Instagram and all the places. All right. Thanks for listening. Thanks to everyone calling us. And whatever review would be super as well. Review, subscribe.

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