Sunday Papers - Thursday Papers w/ Greg and Mike Ep: 7 9/10/20
Episode Date: September 10, 2020More listener corrections and "this day in history." Who wants to run a factory? Jelly Belly Jelly Beans is pulling a Willy Wonka. Plus, Mike gives an update on Sturgis. ...
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Well, it's Thursday, Thursday, Thursday.
It's time for Thursday Papers with Mike and Greg.
Read all about it.
It's Thursday.
Last chance to read real news before the Friday night news dump.
A Friday night, if you guys don't know it, that's, that's
when the good shit comes out. I thought they want to hide stuff. They want to hide, especially on
a three day weekend. Like this past weekend, I was watching hard on Friday night, but that's when all
that, that's when that military stuff came out. Totally. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And the Russia stuff.
Yep. All of it.
How are you doing, Mike?
I'm doing all right. How are you doing?
I'm doing good. Thanks for checking in on me. I had mentioned that I was depressed on the Sunday paper, but I'll tell you what, exercised every day since then,
played some paddle tennis on the beach with Owen today.
Nice.
tennis on the beach with Owen today. Nice. Um, and, uh, you know, played three sets,
dove in the ocean, rode the bike home, outdoor shower, fucking boom. Wow. Yeah. That's all I gotta do. I checked in on you and you wrote back, you know, thanks for checking that you were doing
well. And you're like, I'm heading to the beach. You know, you want to join? And then I completely
ignored it. Then you ghosted me. Yeah. That's about, that's about par for the
course. I would never ghost the guy that said he wasn't doing well. You, you had said you were
doing all right. That's ghost worthy. You can take it. Yeah. Next time you want to see me, tell me you're not doing so hot.
Those are the people I see.
That's a very Irish thing is like, we're the ones that like, we'll send you a mask card if somebody dies, but we don't really want to hear about it.
We want to hear the funny stories about the person that died, but we don't want to really hear about the sadness.
Yeah, probably. Yeah. You know Matt's mom died, right? I do. No, I know that was sad.
Well, welcome to Thursday Papers. Starting off, as always, we do corrections. is uh from alan d i'm glad greg hi greg i'm glad you watched that
japanese movie i watched it when it first came out reminded me of you and the stories you've
told in your podcast about the small misdemeanors you and your rapscallion irish family pulled when
you were younger the movie is called shoplifters not pickpocket you you fucking idiot. Sincerely, L&D.
I like that. So sweet. Right up to the end. I like that a lot.
Yeah, that was a little gut punch. She really drew me in on that one.
I don't think it's a real L&D.
I don't think it's a real L&D It's called
Right
I'm sure it's somebody else
Oh L&D
I just put that together
Okay
Yeah
Yeah
Did you shoplift
By the way I'm not L&D
You fucking idiot
You fucking whore
Did you shoplift as a kid
I remember I took a couple of whatchamacallit bars, uh, from this corner grocery thing.
And it really was, I don't want to excuse myself at all, but, but peer pressure was
a big part of it.
I remember other kids, the green light for me, cause I think I was more, I was more,
uh, scared. And by the way, have, and I think I was more, I was more, uh, scared.
And by the way, have, and again, I'm not letting myself off the hook, scared of being caught,
not scared, you know, not, I wasn't, I wasn't hesitant for any good moral reason. It was all
because I thought I'd be caught. But my dad took a very effective route when he, he brought up, I forgot how he came up, but he asked, he's like, you guys
don't like ever steal or anything like that. Right. He goes, because you have to picture that
poor business owner. Imagine if it was my store and he goes, if it's my store, you're stealing,
you know, from me, you're not stealing from Nestle or Hershey's. Right. You're stealing from me. And that was actually very effective.
Here's what was effective for me.
When we would go to my grandfather's house in the Bronx,
there was a store around the corner on Randall Avenue
called Cards and Stuff.
And we used to call it Cards and Lift
because me and my cousins would go in there
and we'd rob them.
And one time I took,
I was probably about nine and I took, you know, remember those little guns and they shot darts that had plungers on them, like little plunger tips. So, so we're sitting at, it's like Christmas
and we're sitting at the dinner table and I had a lot of fucking cousins. I had like 21 cousins
or something and tons of aunts and uncles. Everybody would drink hard Jameson's and Schaefer beer and toy guns and toy guns.
They don't mix.
So I give it to my father.
My father's sitting at the end of the table and he takes it.
And as a joke, he points it at my grandmother, pulls the trigger and the plunger dart hits her in the face.
And my uncle slapped me.
That about sums up my life with my family.
That's probably, I thought it was going to go in her eye. That's perfect though.
Yeah. Yeah.
Remember those little, they were newspaper candy. I think they call them candy stores,
right? Also at my grandmother's
place in the Bronx around the corner also, but it was packed. It was like the, uh, old version
of a general, maybe the new version of a general store that was like, all right, you have the post.
Do you have, um, you know, uh, cookies? Do you have fucking can, do you have a deck of cards
and do you have birthday candles? Yup. Got, yup. Got them all. Got them all. Do you have cookies? Do you have fucking candy? Do you have a deck of cards? And do you have birthday candles?
Yep.
Got them all.
Got them all.
Do you have the paddle that hits the little ball?
Yep.
Got that also.
Yeah.
And the place was like a 12 by 12 store.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Unbelievable.
And those were truly American dream type businesses.
That was truly like somehow this guy from Italy or Ireland
pulled together enough money to get a little store,
worked 14 hours a day, and now the Koreans do it.
You know, you see a lot of Korean stores.
Same thing.
And then this American disgrace walks in and steals his stuff.
Yeah, right.
All right, so that's a correction.
The other correction, well, let's skip it.
Let's do it on sunday because we
got a lot to get to today okay new segment suggested by a listener i should know that
listener's name i will i will say it in the next episode suggested we start doing this day in
history as a lot of newspapers do so in this day in history which is uh well we're taping this on the 8th, so we'll say on September 8th.
Coming out on the 10th, in a controversial executive action, Gerald Ford.
President Gerald Ford pardons his disgraced predecessor, Richard Nixon, for crimes he's committed.
And Ford later defended his this action before the house judiciary
committee explaining he wanted to end the national division divisions created by the watergate scandal
was that the right thing to do i mean it's a big question because the country like it is today, was very divided. And the feeling that Ford had was,
we should move past this and get back together as a country.
Right. Yeah. I don't know. I wonder what historians, that was the story. And I wonder,
I wonder how much we did move on.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Because depending on who's saying move on, it could be very lame.
Like it's no, there should be justice.
So many people probably didn't move on at all.
Well, I mean, if you look at what happened with apartheid in South Africa, there was truth commissions.
And they've done that.
They did that after World War II with the Nazis.
They had truth commissions where they had trials.
People got to speak.
People that had been violated got to speak.
But then there were not punishments doled out.
And they felt that that was cathartic and cleansing and restorative for the for the uh
for society so um you know the fact that people saw that there was um there was a um uh Why am I forgetting the name?
Name of what?
Impeachment.
There was an impeachment and that it worked.
Even though ultimately he was not convicted, he was pardoned, the process worked.
And that was empowering and people felt that that's all we needed to do. Now, if I'm Gerald Ford's wife, I'm going to be a dick monster because I know no matter what I do and how much of a cuck I make that guy, he's going to pardon me.
He's going to forgive me. If I'm his kids, I'm stealing the car.
I'm staying out all night, stealing his coin collection to buy an eight ball of blow.
By the way, just as we were doing the story, I looked up this little tidbit.
an eight ball, a blow. By the way, just as we were doing the story, I looked up this little tidbit.
During the Watergate scandal, President Nixon's lawyer suggested that a self-pardon would be legal. Really? Because the question is, can a president pardon himself? That came up when
Trump was being impeached and his people were pushing for the same thing.
And then, so in the same little tidbit, then the Department of Justice issued a memorandum opinion on August 5th of 74 stating that a president cannot pardon himself.
Yeah.
Well, what do we think the Department of Justice, what kind of memo do you think they'd cough up these days?
Yeah, right. what do we think the department of justice, what kind of memo do you think they'd cough up these days? Yeah.
Right.
Um,
yeah.
And the other weird thing about it is,
you know,
Ford was not Nixon's vice president.
It was Spiro Agnew and Spiro Agnew got bounced out of office for,
I don't know what he did.
Some kind of taxes,
right?
Was it taxes?
Yeah.
So,
so Ford was,
I don't know what the process was.
Was Ford the Senate majority leader?
Who gets stepped up to vice president?
No, didn't he go to, oh yeah.
I don't even know.
And I should know more about that while we're getting it.
Because I know succession is president, vice president, and then I think it's Senate.
Speaker of the House.
Oh, Speaker of the House. Speaker of the House.
Not Senate majority leader?
I don't know.
Anyway.
God, people are probably banging on their steering wheels right now listening to this.
We will hear it on Corrections.
All right, let's get to a couple stories, Mike.
All right.
Here's a fun one uh this candy maker has decided david klein is the guy jelly belly
jelly belly jelly beans i think the jelly bean company uh in the country is um giving away
the company or a factory to uh anybody that can there's a treasure hunt and there, and you gotta, you gotta, um,
buy a ticket. It's 50 bucks to buy a ticket to the treasure hunt.
And then whoever finds this treasure wins a fucking candy factory.
It's so romantic because of, um, you know, because of Willy Wonka and everything, but like
running a factory when it's not a
Hollywood factory.
Yeah.
Right.
Even those.
Yeah.
There's no Oompa Loompas that are doing all the grunt work and don't get paid.
They're not.
You think there's actually, there's actually tons of them, but you're going to get a lot
of trouble.
Yeah.
Right. There's actually tons of them But you're gonna get in a lot of trouble Yeah right
Now they're not unionized
And they'll sue you if they get injured on the job
Um
And also like
Yeah running a factory
Would be the worst fucking job
And uh
I wonder
I wonder whoever wins has got some
Fucking grandparent laying in bed,
some lazy piece of shit who just keeps buying tickets for his grandson.
Four of them.
Four grandparents.
By the way, all four grandparents alive.
I don't think that was true in such squalid conditions.
Right.
Also, is this little girl or boy who wins this amazing prize of running a factory, must they move then to Mexico where the factory is located?
Yeah. One of the story, Mike, why don't you update us on what's going on? It is kind of your story, Sturgis.
your story, Sturgis. Okay. So there's a huge story on Sturgis, which is a study came out from California. So it's all over the news. And we had a lot of listeners write in to say, we should
really follow up on this because we kind of called it. But the study suggests that Sturgis led to 260,000 COVID-19 cases.
So do you have the stats there?
Yeah, they basically said that the amount of money it will cost to deal with this is in the neighborhood of $12 billion.
Which I don't really buy.
So there's a lot of critics of this.
The study hasn't been peer reviewed
and they applied some interesting math.
I think I called it up here.
Hold on.
They applied some interesting math,
which was, let me find it.
All right, but let's just say,
while you're looking it up,
let me crunch some numbers.
Let's say this is off by 50%.
Let's say this is off by 50%. Let's say this is off by 90%.
If it's off by, that's 25,000 cases will have happened.
And I think the death rate is around 2%.
So out of 20-
I think it's lower, but yeah.
No, I think it's around 2%.
Okay. you no i think it's around two percent okay so out of 25 000 two percent of 25 000 is about uh
2 500 divided by 20 is i'm not even gonna try it's hundreds it's hundreds of deaths
i'm gonna say 500 deaths so okay i don't know is that okay is that okay that they all had a drunken rally
and and almost as many of them died driving off the highway on their motorcycles without
their helmet that's right that's the real not to mention these people smoke marlboro reds
they are way more susceptible to catching this virus than I granted. They're not,
they're not black because, uh, black people seem to catch it. Did they catch it more frequently
or do they have a harder time with the actual virus? Oh, I should lead by saying, I don't know.
My guess was, uh, generally without talking about race the poor
communities are hit much harder poorer communities have worse nutrition more health you know more
health issues and far less hospitals far less health care exactly and access to top health care
right so there's that right there's also many of them who are undocumented who probably fear like getting anything treated as well yeah so yeah this is controversial uh south dakota governor christy
noam said that the study was fiction she criticized journalists who reported it but it was covered by
fox news i got all my stats from fox news on this no i know Fox News, though, in addition to being, you know, questionable on many levels, is also super lazy. And I think like all the other super lazy outlets, they just kind of ran with the story. But this is one thing I read that confused me. 2 billion of a potential public health cost was it came from a separate study published last month
by two economists. And the study found that the non-fatal COVID-19 cases cost a weighted average,
get this, of $46,000 per case. But don't many of these cases cost zero? Well, I think if many cause zero, but I think
that if you end up on a respirator, that that could be a half a million dollars.
For one patient? Oh, sure. Being on a respirator. Are you shitting me?
Because let them die. Let them die. That's like, no, don't say that. Don't say that. I mean,
come on. What? That's like, are we going to, are we going to save the goldfish or flush it?
So you're saying once somebody's on a respirator, once somebody's at the point where they need
a respirator, we should let them die?
If it costs that much, what, is that heartless?
What?
What is the price of a human life?
I mean, if you talk to insurance companies, there are people whose job it is to assign value to human life. I mean, if you talk to insurance companies, there are people whose job it is
to assign value to human life. And if you're a male and you're the breadwinner or a female,
that's the breadwinner, your life is worth more of a payout. In other words, if there's an accident
and it's negligence on the part of the city.
And your son dies and he's 11 or he's a baby.
The payout is nominal.
But if it's you and you're the bread earner, it can be millions of dollars.
So they put prices on a life.
I think there are prices on everything.
Did I ever tell you that story? My good friend, old friend, Joe Tenetti, he's an artist and he was working in a museum of
modern art.
I believe it was in New York.
And I went and visit him on a lunch hour and he gave me quick tour, insider's tour.
And he was like, you know about this painting?
And I was like, oh yeah, no, like I recognize that.
He's like, yeah, that's high on the list.
I'm like, what list?
He's like, oh, the fire list list i'm like what list he's like oh the fire list i'm like what fire list is like oh there's sort of a priority if shit goes
sideways what to grab first no shit and i'm like wait a minute isn't all art subjective and
obviously there's literal prices when they auction but even in the museum um and some factors were
like was it on loan from another museum?
You know what I mean?
But that there was kind of like the fire drill pecking order of what got grabbed.
Dude, if I was in the museum and there was a fire, I'd be running up to, I'd go to the fucking modern wing.
And I would just start, the canvas that's just white, that's worth $12 million.
I'll pull out my BIC and throw some fucking gas on it.
I swear to God, I get so angry when I go to the modern wing. I can't go to the Guggenheim and these places.
Blue Square.
Oh my God.
So anyway, I don't really buy this math because also listen the 46 000 per case i don't know how
it gets that high when most cases easily most cases are going to cost zero if you have covid
other like you know maybe the cost of bad cold for some keep in mind some some of these cases
we have to factor in don't have any of the symptoms. And then also, according to a lot of studies,
the respirators are killing people. So remember, you can't count any of the respirator costs
of people that died. These were the cases, what do they call them? The non-death cases?
Oh, really?
The non-fatal. Yeah, they're talking about this study was assumed that these were the non-fatal cases.
I don't know.
One of the things they always factor in is if you didn't go to work, that's a loss of income, a loss of, you know, it hurts the economy if people aren't working.
There's all that that they factor in as well.
Well, if I didn't come to work To this Thursday podcast I'd make
I'd probably make money
Some other way
What are you talking about
We got ads
We got ads
Oh that's right
I mean I wouldn't lose money
Oh okay
You break even
Speaking of which
Let's talk about our good friends
Over at Seaview Lobster Company
Tom
Wait did you get lobsters
Why are we reading this again
I haven't even heard from
Fucking Kevin
Hey Kevin what's up
Are you not getting any orders at all?
I think he says he listens to this.
He doesn't listen to this.
Yeah, I know.
If you want to get some lobster, the freshest way to get it.
Let's get Kevin's attention.
Let's do an ad for his competitor next week.
Jimmy's Lobsters in Banger, Maine.
Don't you want your lobster from a place called Banger?
Bay View Lobsters.
We can say lobster's cheaper because we don't have a Seaview.
In all seriousness, check out their website is seaviewlobster.com.
It's terrible.
It's antiquated.
That's how real they're keeping it up in Maine.
To order it, you got to fucking go.
You got to call them.
800-245-4997.
The lobster's great, and you know it is because their website sucks.
Good ad read.
Should we do, all right, let's do a letter real quick.
We're way over time.
Are we?
We're at 20. Holy moly, let's wind this thing up. All right, let's do a letter real quick. We're way over time. Are we? We're at 20.
Holy moly, let's wind this thing up.
All right.
Hey, Greg and Mike.
In conversation about wedding bands and the latest Thursday papers, Greg speculated his father was buried with his wedding band on before stating factually that he was definitely buried with his driver.
that he was definitely buried with his driver.
Only in the next phrase was it clarified he was a big golfer,
whereupon I burst out laughing.
With the context, I had interpreted driver as chauffeur.
Love the podcast, Kyle.
Kyle, are we in ancient Egypt?
Who has a servant buried with them?
I don't even think then they put them in the same tomb,
in the same, you know, casket or whatever it was called then.
Right.
And plus, how would he get to the cemetery if we put his driver in there?
Right.
That is funny, though.
All right.
This is from our... By the way, if you enjoy the podcast,
go to the Apple Podcast site
and leave us a review.
It's really nice.
Leave us some stars.
It helps us move up in the rankings,
get some more listeners.
This is from one that says,
I am a Joanne.
Six stars.
Love these guys. I wake up on sunday morning
singing the original sunday papers song can't wait to listen to these guys while making breakfast
their humor is my cup of tea i like that yeah that nice that's a nice one all right let's get to some reviews. This week, my movie review, I watched two.
My daughter, I fucking love my daughter because she has such a dark, interesting, funny sense of humor.
Is your review about your daughter?
Did you freeze or are you just staring me down?
I'm just staring at you.
She likes watching movies ironically. did you freeze or are you just staring me down? I'm just staring at you. Um, she,
she likes watching movies.
Ironically,
like we watched high school musical one through three or four,
however many there were.
Wow.
You're a good dad.
It's like,
no,
but it's like mystery science 2000.
We watch or 3000.
We watch.
So we watched two of the twilight movies this week and,
they are so fucking good.
They are good. Yeah. yeah i mean the acting is
atrocious the uh the cinematography is particularly bad just uh just everything about it is cheesy but
they're good somehow you walk away thinking about the movie and feeling something about the movie so
uh that was fun were you team team Jacob or team? What's the
other guy? Edward, Edward, Edward. Who could have been team Jacob? I never understood that.
Well, Jacob was fucking ripped. He had a sick body. I mean, uh, if I could have any body I've
ever seen, I think it might be Jacob's body. body well it sounds like you might be team jacob
you asked why some people might like him all i know is after after there was a bunch of scenes
with her and jacob and he was shirtless because he's a wolf then they cut back to edward and
remember he took his shirt off to walk into the square in part two, he looks so scrawny and pale.
All I could think was like,
ah,
you may want to rethink bachelor number one on this one.
Nice.
What'd you watch this week?
Well,
I watched that,
you know,
we talked on Sunday about that missing leg story that the guy found a missing
leg.
And it reminded me of that documentary finders keepers. So,
which I knew about, but I had never seen. So I went and watched it and, uh,
there's a lot of rich North Carolina and South Carolina characters in it.
Yeah. And, uh, yeah. So a leg is found.
I'm not giving anything away here and the person who finds it won't give it back
that's great that's all i'll say that's all i'll say that's a great documentary i think it was on
amazon i'm not sure i don't it was not on netflix any any longer yeah and then um i'm watching the
last episode of season one of alone with my girls right after this.
I just watched that last week, so we can talk about that on Sunday.
We'll get into the season one Alone.
What else did I do?
Oh, I went back and watched an old school movie, Double Indemnity.
Is that Hitchcock?
Huh?
Is that Hitchcock?
No, it's not, but it's film noir, and it might as well be a Hitchcock.
But it's with, of course, I'm going to-
Gregory Peck?
Barbara Stanwyck?
No.
You know who it was with, which really surprised, because we grew up somehow on, and then it
was Nick and I, we used to watch My Three Sons.
Oh, of course.
Fred McMurray, is that his name?
Yeah, yeah. The dad, who was in this, such a simple, dumb sitcom,
but he was a badass, and he plays the,
he is the movie Double Indemnity.
Oh, no shit.
Yes.
Wow.
And Edward G. Robinson's, yeah, see?
Yeah, yeah.
And he's there chomping on his cigar.
It's all cigar with that guy the whole movie.
Nice.
But it's a very good movie you know
it's in most people's top 20 movies of all time i'll watch it uh the other thing we're supposed
to watch together separately because of quarantine is that um jimmy breslin and uh
pete hamill gonna watch it yeah yep should we do that for Sunday? Let's do that for Sunday. Okay.
Let's get real quick to Dear Abby.
Okay.
And then we'll close it out.
Quick Dear Abby for you.
Let's see if I can find it.
Found it.
Dear Abby, although he has never hit me.
Oh, I am all in on this letter I almost just want to stop there
It's such a strong start
I honestly am looking at the economy of words
One, two, three, four
That's six words
I don't know if you could start one off juicier than that
And not, he has never hit me
Although So it
immediately makes you think it's just short of hitting her. And I don't know what that is yet.
Although he has never hit me, my husband has been emotionally and verbally abusive ever since our
wedding five years ago. One of his favorite names for me when he's angry.
You know, we read these advice calls. Remember the one,
he always calls me baby, sweet baby, baby, baby, sweet baby. This one's a little different.
One of his favorite names for me when he's angry is fucking bitch.
I love that dear Abby put that in. She only gave you F dot, dot, dot, and B dot, dot, dot, dot.
I gave you F dot, dot, dot, and B dot, dot, dot, dot.
It's weird that they only gave two letters and fucking, but it's the N apostrophe.
She didn't even just, anyway.
Yeah.
I know, I know this is my fault.
I don't know.
This letter is packed.
This letter is dense, man.
One of his favorite names for me when he's angry is fucking bitch.
I know this is my fault because I have tolerated it.
Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
I do not think that is the view to take.
Anyway, here we go.
Today, my two and a half year old daughter, who is usually a good girl, threw a tantrum and called me that same name twice.
Oh, shit. I tried to discipline her,
but she doesn't understand that she's saying something bad. If daddy can call me that, how can she? He blames me for her talking that way. Wow. Saying he hasn't called me that in a
month. He called me that last week. That was parenthetical. He called me that last week. That was parenthetical.
He called me that last week.
I don't use that language.
I love that they're bickering about whether he called her a fucking bitch a week ago or a month ago.
In front of the daughter.
Yeah.
He's not denying.
Right.
I have suggested marriage counseling in the past, but he refused.
I can't leave him because I am seven months pregnant with our second child.
Oh, that fucking bitch.
How do I get both of them to respect me?
Disrespected in the past.
In the East.
Oh, right.
Sorry.
Disrespected in the East.
Yeah, it's not in the past.
Where to start?
Jesus.
How about starting with birth control, first of all?
I know.
How do you let that guy get you pregnant again?
That fucking bitch should not have gotten pregnant again.
Also, if two people in her house are calling her that, maybe.
Yeah, you have to stop and look at yourself.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't know Here I gotta think that
What do you do to the daughter
Who's calling you a fucking bitch
Because you can't hit her
And the more she knows not to say it
The more she's gonna say it
I think you gotta just move
I think you pack your shit
And you just say you two are on your own
I'm outie 5000 With,000 with the baby.
Take the one in your stomach.
Go.
Well, I remember reading, I don't know.
I don't have a pace to here.
I remember reading the Dear Abby response and it was basically, you have to go right
away to individual therapy and you have to tell your therapist about this because this
is obviously an incredibly bad and toxic situation in the house. And also
Abby, to her credit, maybe she's been through this. I think Abby's been called a fucking bitch
once or twice in her career, her storied career. She said that it was an interesting point that
the daughter is not obviously meaning any disrespect. The daughter can't operate on that level.
When they use foul language and all that, it's for attention.
Yeah.
To get your attention in either a positive or negative way,
obviously in a negative way.
So anyway, yeah, but that's a tough one.
And I don't know if, I don't know with all the time you have,
writing Dear Abby is your first move.
Right.
I think the clock is ticking a little faster than U.S. Postal Service and then writing, you know, her writing and publishing it.
I don't.
I obviously have never called my wife anything horrible in front of my kids.
my wife anything horrible in front of my kids, but when we're in my room, my daughter apparently says she can hear everything we say because she's right next to us. And, you know, I have kind of a
running shtick where I call her a bitch and a whore. And it's kind of just for laughs because
my wife, as you know, is like the nicest human being on the planet. Yeah, that bitch is pretty nice.
It just makes me laugh that I say these horrible things.
And my daughter has never confronted me on it.
And I never know if she knows I'm being ironic
or if I'm this monster behind closed doors.
Yeah.
Well, I think next time she'll be like,
stop listening, you fucking bitch.
I'm going to talk to this whore for a while.
Meanwhile, I just yelled that in here.
My two daughters are my next one.
But imagine this guy now reading the paper like, that fucking bitch.
You're going to air our dirty laundry to Dear Abby?
Yeah.
Jesus.
Although he's never hit me.
All right.
No, there's a couple of things going on there.
We're way over.
Okay, we're done.
I want to remind people the Grapefruit Simmons t-shirts.
Look at it.
A high quality cotton.
They're going fast.
I got a new shipment like three weeks ago and they're about three quarters gone.
So get online.
Go to FitzDog.com.
Get a gift for somebody.
Buy it for yourself.
You've got one, Mike.
I do.
It's in here.
I see it.
It's in my closet.
Hold on.
How come you never wear it?
What do you mean?
It's in the laundry.
Look at it.
Paint it.
Look at it.
Look at that.
Good quality.
I love it.
It really is good quality.
All right.
So we'll see you guys on Sunday
With a very big show we're excited about
As always
And Mike anything you want to promote?
Um
Uh
Yeah Earl Campbell
I thought of that when I was at the beach
I'm like
Running back to the Houston Oilers?
I loved him man Yeah he was great i'm
just gonna fucking thighs dude no they were like size they were like 38 because everyone would talk
about people's waist would your belt fit around his thigh he was just this machine i didn't even
i hated his team i didn't even care but i remember watching him run all over like the pittsburgh
steelers and stuff but i just thought whenever you ask me and I say nothing, why not give a shout out?
Why not put his name out there in the air, in the ether?
Like, in other words, he was, he meant, like, I loved the guy when I was little.
I hope he's, you know, I've read up on him a little, not since, but like a year ago.
And because of all the abuse, he's in a wheelchair, I think, because everything is shot.
His hips, his knees, everything.
Now, I remember Frank O'Harris was a guy like that.
I just love watching Frank O'Harris.
Those guys were so fucking thick, and they just ran through people.
Go to YouTube, man.
I haven't seen them.
I'm sure there's compilations of Earl Campbell running.
You will be amazed.
Football season starts, is it this Sunday?
It's this Sunday.
Thursday makes the first game, actually.
Right, okay.
So we can talk about that.
Tonight.
Don't forget our sponsor, MyBookie.
Go there and bet.
Okay, we'll see you on Sunday.
Wrap it up. Take it easy. Wrap it up wrap it up put it on uh
if there was a hurricane put it over the windows um wrap some antiques in that shit start start a
fire kindling and this paper don't but not in californ No. All right. Take it easy.
God bless.
Bye-bye.
Well, it's Thursday.
It's time for Thursday Papers with Mike and Greg.