supermegashow - EP 135 - Mama Extinction

Episode Date: April 6, 2019

Matt and Ryan talk about his BIG big mom causing an extinction event and other stuff...and some other stuff. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Call 1-866- 531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca Please play responsibly. Here we are again, another podcast on a Friday. Doesn't it feel good, Matt? It feels great. I know all of you guys have been prepping your ears all week to listen to the brand new episode 135 of the Super Mega Podcast.

They're thinking, just, god damn, every moment of my week sucks until I can turn on that sweet, mediocre podcast and let it numb me away. How you been? Most exciting start to any podcast just so uh so what's up what's going on in your life it's gonna be a long hour uh yeah dude it's pretty good you know um trying to think of like recent life updates uh last week remember i went to the dentist. It's been a week since then. My teeth are in impeccable pain.

Really? My back teeth. I keep waking up in the middle of the night. Caps come off? No, they're still on, but they hurt like shit. I got a new flossing device. I got a water pick because that's more fun to floss with than regular boring old floss. I love water picks. I got one when I got braces.

Yeah. I turn it up on 10. I fucking through my teeth. It's great. Shred your gums. It actually hurts. It hurts really bad, but I know it's getting all that bad stuff out of there and that's what I need. What else, man? Bananas still being an asshole to me. My cat, you know,

being a little bit of a C-word. Whoa, dude. I didn't say it. I'm sorry. That's just a bit. Come on. Oh my God. My face is oozing.

You see that? Why? Why are you messing with it? I didn't mess with it. It just popped. No, it didn't. How did it pop on its own? You messed with it.

Because I was in the bathroom and I was messing with it. Yeah, go clean. There's blood all over your fucking face. Is there really? Yeah, there's blood on your face. Guys, I have a cyst on my face. Go clean your finger. Go clean your face.

Keep everyone entertained while I do that. Update them on your life. Okay, I'll update them on my life. Jesus Christ. This is disgusting. As Matt wipes the blood and pus from his face, let's talk about what Ryan's been up to. I know most of you really don't care,

but thank you for giving me this moment to talk about my life because I really only talk about my life to three people, my dad, my mom, and my dog. That's all I need. So I recently started Sekiro and there will be a lot of people that say, well, you must not have played that many games then. But Sekiro is definitely the hardest game I've ever played. I got stuck on Junichiro for a while, because I'm playing it personally as well as whatever on Super Mario. Hey, Junichiro.

Junichiro is Hank Hill's Japanese brother in King of the Hill when he goes over to Japan and meets his long-lost brother. Junichiro! You know, it's that. Yeah. I love that episode, dude. Well, I was stuck on him for a while, and then I finally beat him, and I had to give myself a round of applause,

and now I'm deciding whether I should go to the monks, to the monkeys, or if I should explore more. Leave a comment down below and that'll decide which path I take next. Wow, dude, look at you. Incorporating the viewers into your own personal life. We should start doing everything via polls

on Twitter. Like, hey, what you should have for lunch every day. Should I go to work on time? Yes or no? And then when Brent gets mad, he's like, Brent, did you see the poll this morning? See this five minute poll that I only voted on no just like two second poll I voted on myself and then closed Brent look at that that's 100% man it says one every everybody said I shouldn't come into work on time yeah you know you're making money I guess but uh not making

me money but I I found myself as I've been doing lately, I've been, instead of like social media before bed, I've been trying to go on like a Wikipedia dive before bed. Because I got the Wikipedia app on my phone, which is surprisingly like a really nice app. You can like bookmark pages and it's pretty cool. And it gives you like a random page of the day and shows you like this day in history. It's pretty cool. And it gives you like a random page of the day and shows you like this day in history. So I ended up on a page called like list of biggest disasters and accidents. And it has them sectioned off by like submarine, airplane, train, industrial.

And like I spent like. Tiananmen Square. Yeah. No, that didn't happen. I went down like three fucking like hours of just going down that rabbit hole. Dude, some crazy shit has happened that i had no idea ever happened are you saying matt you don't know the entirety of human history and all the disasters that encompass it i'm i i'm saying that there's some big fucking ones i didn't know about a flood in china killed like one to four million people floods kill people all the time dude i was reading about this dam that broke in china and created this wave that killed like 400 000 people taught them to build

better dams i'm sure certainly did guys there's a lesson in every story okay every disaster there's a lesson it's a beautiful lesson a uh an olive branch you can grab onto yeah and then when you learn more about yourself through the process i was hoping you just put a band-aid over it we don't have any bending it and i'm not squeezing it we don't have any bandages there are because i'm trying to get this toy like the paper towel to stick to my face so it'll just stay there you shave yeah but there's no that's a huge blotch of blood on that yeah i know that this office has oh we have japanese signs but no band-aids there's no band-aids. There's no

band-aids at the office. I checked everywhere. What? Yeah. We had a big box of them. You're telling me we use all the band-aids? No band-aids. If I go out there and I find a band-aid, Matt. What? Yeah. Choose a punishment. Because I would love a band-aid. I could slap you. Sure. Okay. Just not on this side.

Yeah, sure. That's bad. Well, I'm gonna go search for a band-aid. Ryan knew this situation was gonna happen so he brought one from home just to just so he can cause me bodily harm I think I saw one

on the ground outside I'm gonna go grab that one it's just a fucking nasty bandaid that someone's already used I was swimming in the pool once and um I felt something like

sticking to me and I looked and it was just a bloody bandaid that was not mine guys don't go swimming in the pool if you got a bandaid on or if you do make sure it's secure okay I felt something like sticking to me and I looked and it was just a bloody band-aid that was not mine Guys don't go swimming in the pool if you got a band-aid on or if you do make sure it's secure, okay? I don't want that shit coming off and going for its own little swim you know find it finding a new host a new person to go home with I

hear Ryan coming I Hear him No, I don't. I think so. Where the fuck were the band-aids? I didn't know there was a drawer with band-aids in them. Oh, wow. You brought- I don't want any Neosporin. I don't think

it's good. It's- No, I'm going to the- I'm going to the- I'm going to the dermatologist tomorrow and I- Yeah, that'd be fucking sick, dude. I think I'm going to the I'm going to the derm I'm going to the dermatologist tomorrow Yeah, that'd be fucking sick dude see if magic was real we wouldn't need to go to the doctor You know we would just fucking straight up. Just be like yeah Can you can you poof away my cancer and they'd be like sure? And no more cancer wish we had witch doctors that actually like could perform little spells and stuff. You're fucking...

Magic's not real guys. I'm sorry. I had to break it to you, but magic is not real. So uh... I'm gonna put this on my face. This band-aid is... Band-aid is going on. There it's on. Take my glasses off. You want to give me a little slap for the mic? I... We didn't say little slap. We said slap.

You didn't say big slap though. I- well, I didn't- Well, here's the thing- There's little slaps, then there's slaps, and then there's big slaps. You just said slap. We're just going- we're going in the middle ground. Okay, I'll give you- I'll give you a slap. Ready?

Ready? Yup. Again. Oh! Fuck! Yeah, that shit, uh, shit- That shit hurted but uh yeah but now you have a band-aid yeah so you don't have to continue to hold up a you actually have a slew of uh band-aids you brought me you brought me one band-aid that's like it's like four by five inches yeah i was gonna i was gonna

come in here and the slap i was gonna slap that on your face and be like, there, two in one. But I thought that would be too mean because you didn't want me to slap the side of your face that had the cyst. Ryan, let me tell you something. I grew up with siblings, buddy. I don't think things are mean. They don't affect me. I don't think growing up with siblings changes the fact whether something's mean-spirited, mean or not. siblings changes the fact whether something's mean-spirited, mean or not. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects

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a president presentation how old was she elementary school who in front of everybody means it was some event at the school on saturday i have a very blurred memory of this but i remember i just like were you grounded for this oh yeah i i still remember being put in the car my mom was like you are in so much trouble like i i still i remember that feeling where i was like uh-oh you pantsed her i pantsed her yeah or i Or I lifted her skirt or something while she was giving it. Oh, my God. Dude, I was a shitty little brother. I was like, how old was I?

A shitty son. You were fucking ruining your mom's mornings. I'm not a shitty son. How did I ruin my mom's mornings? Oh, by the ketchup packet prank. On the back of her pants or legs. Yeah, and she had to change her. Sorry, Mom. Yeah, I shift a changer. Sorry, Mom.

Yeah, I don't deserve such a good family. Not my dad deserves all the other. Okay, my dad, I was on the phone with him recently. He was like, you know, I was listening to your last podcast. And I was like, uh-oh. I thought you stopped listening to that stuff, Dad. So my dad is going to come to the Charleston, South Carolina show, which I didn't know if he was going to, but he is.

You're going to be on your A game. Yeah, I'm going to be on my A game. I'm going to make sure I do a live rendition of I'm in love with my dad. Pay attention to Matt and see if he kind of suppresses his performance a bit, knowing that his dad and his mom are watching. Yo, my dad!

I just found out that one of my high school teachers is coming to mine. Really? Yep. That's, I don't, I'm trying to think of who's coming. Like I got, I got some family members coming to the show and no, no, no old friends. We got a Christian Seneff is coming to the Columbia show. Is he?

The Christian Seneff. Oh shit. The fucking Christian Seneff. The man, the myth,ian sinif the man the myth the legend um he's the guy that you know i did hentai club to uh almost made him drink my piss all

those classic stories the guy that where the bar joke happens in the let's go shopping or whatever video you did on kids with problems right yes that guy yep um but you know it's gonna be fun uh please uh

there's still time to get tickets to those shows. They're in about a week, a little over a week away. Please come. It'll be super fun, especially the Charleston one. Come. Come. So I don't want to be embarrassed in front of my Columbia one might be fun, too.

Well, the Columbia one is sold double the tickets the Charleston one has. So I'm trying to really not be embarrassed in front of my family members here. Town, baby. Home town. Yeah. You got to come see that one. It'll have child pictures and all sorts of fun stuff members here. Hometown, baby. Hometown. Yeah, you gotta come see that one. It'll have child pictures and all sorts of fun stuff.

Yeah. Not pictures of us, it's just pictures of children. Yeah, I mean, the shows are really fun. I have a blast doing them. All the ones on the Pacific Northwest tour, that was a real slam dunk, buddy. That was fun. Nice getting to see all of y'all. Get to meet all y'all.

If you got a VIP ticket, we got some sick merch. I don't know if we can talk about it yet. I don't think we can. We got a sick merch item for you guys. Real sick poster too. Yep. You saw the merch item, right? I know exactly what you're talking about.

Dope. I hope I can get one so I can use it. Really? Yeah, I'd use that. Y'all don't know what it is yet, but y'all will understand my kind of just reaction or lack thereof when you see what it is because it's actually, it leaves me breathless.

Because it's so cool. It's so cool. So epic. Well, so originally like for the VIP ticket item, it was just going to be- Our usual tote bag. The thank you tote bag. But I realized that I was like, well,

you know, if you're a big enough fan to get a VIP letter, like a meet and greet ticket, then odds are you might already have that tote bag. So I don't want people to... So we got to make you something that's going to be special. You can't just come to a super mega show and it can't just be it's the same old same old. Same old tote bag you already got.

No, it's the same show, right? We're never going to change the show. It's just be it's the same old same same old tote bag you already got it's like the same show right we're never gonna change the show it's always gonna be the same boring talk type of shit but our merch that we have at our shows is always gonna be poppin absolutely oh come for the merch stay for the talk exactly here you go guys if you want to if you want some

incentive to come to the shows the thank you bag shirt and the Japanese red shirt those will both be available at the show. If you want one, they're not online right now. You can go to the show and get it. So better buy those tickets. Link is in the description. SuperMegaShow.net You can see us live and in person.

Basically the show is just we fucking sit and we do this podcast live and fuck around with each other. Digging in your pants there, buddy? I'm not digging in my pants. What is that? What do you mean? I have both my hands out of my pants. If I reach for my camera, you're going to take your hand out of your pants there, buddy? I'm not digging in my pants. What is that? What do you mean I have both my hands out of my pants? If I reach for my camera, you're gonna take your hand out of your pants. No I'm not. Why are you still- what are you- are you scratching?

I'm not doing anything in my pants. What the fuck are you talking about? I'm not letting this go until you- Why? You're just gaslighting the audience. I'm not gaslighting the audience. You're just bringing things up for the whole audience. You pulled your penis out. I did not pull my penis out!

You're bringing it back in. What are you talking about? Your right hand's still in your pants. My right hand is- Both hands are up. Look, I'm clapping. How are my hands in my pants? Now you're putting them back in your pants right now. There it is.

No, it's not. Clap right now. Nope. Oh, there it is. You're gaslighting the audience. You had to bring it up. You're gaslighting the audience. No, you're just gaslighting me, which is unfortunate.

But now you just sniffed your hand and you're going to deny it. No, okay. I do not do that. Stop. You can't preface it. You can't make some... You're a good actor. He's going to deny it. You're okay. I do not do that. Stop. You can't preface it. You can't make something and then he's going to deny it. You're a good actor, Matt.

You learn well. You do the same thing when you switch the Skittles and M&Ms in the Grumps office. Okay, shut up. That's not me. And here you go again. That wasn't me.

You're just going to say everything's a lie that I say. I told you that in privacy not to tell anybody and the first thing you did was go and told Ike who told everyone else. See?

So now you know that Matt's a liar because he lied about he tried to lie about it to you and then he told me in secrecy just now which I'm going to keep in the podcast. No, I didn't. I want you to keep the whole thing in. I didn't want you to cut that out.

Good, good. I told you that in confidence. Why'd you, why'd you, why'd you ruin my prank and tell Ike? Cause Ike, Ike is a good boy. He's the one that has to put up with that. No, he's not. Now, if it was Brent, I'd be like, well, I don't know. Ike's a good boy.

Well, you could have told him secretly. He wouldn't blab to everybody. Well, now I know that he's not a trustworthy man. He's not a trustworthy person. I thought you'd be able to figure that out, how he doesn't wear a shirt most days. That's weird. You know, everyone else is fully clothed and he walks around without a shirt on. It's a weird thing to do.

Did you ever have like a friend as a kid that just never wore a shirt? No. I had this one friend who was always shirt that just never wore a shirt? No. I had this one friend who was always shirtless and never wore shoes. Just every time I was with him. Just only pants. Was he like a jock? Yes, but he was just weird. That reminds me of a video that I saw where this dad and son,

and throughout the sequence of this video, it was like their shirts come on and off. It's this dad and son that go to a bear den of a sleeping like bear mother and her cubs and shoot into the den and illegally kill both the mom and the cubs i thought you were setting up for like a gay porn joke and now i'm horribly depressed yep i watched the video more depressing yeah oh that's and they're just like it's horrible there's nothing that's gonna link it to us and then uh they lied uh i i believe they lied to law enforcement or the judge I'm just gonna say law enforcement

or just the judicial system in general or just he lied to law they lied to law and they still got leniency I think yeah so it was a sick kill they did a double high five afterwards they went no one's

it's not gonna get linked to us and then right after saying that the video cuts to them taking pictures with the dead bear and shit. That's a very good earnest hunt right there. A sleeping mother bear with her cubs. She could have been alive, but they're in the den and it's illegal

to kill a female bear and her cubs in that specific part where they were. I don't get it. They've got their hunting licenses revoked. I don't understand. I just don't really get hunting that much. A lot of people still do it just to kind of for food.

Yeah, but we don't need to anymore. We don't need to in California and New York and bustling cities, but I think there are some rural areas where yeah, you can still go to a burger down at a diner and buy hamburger meat and stuff, but maybe you don want to you know give into that type of industry and so you're just going to go take from mother nature of animals that are uh infestations like deer for example are infestations and actually need to be hunted ryan are we the infestation

or are they uh technically we are but i mean that's also calling for genocide so is that something you want to go down yeah okay how would you commit genocide how would you how would you build a genocidal event I've been waiting for this question dude I've been thinking about it every night before I go to sleep it's actually what puts me to sleep because it brings me such peace

probably if I had to enact a genocidal movement um dude probably I would I would go in the middle of the ocean and I'd push your mom off a boat and a huge tsunami would happen because she's so fat and it would just drown everybody. That was good. That was good, right?

That was really good. Pretty good one? You don't have any legit plans on how you would corral a nation of people to think that it would be okay to kill in mass numbers a certain group of people, whether it be for their political beliefs or the color

of their skin or even to their gender? I can't say I've thought about it or have a plan. Other than pushing my mom off a boat and having because she she's so fat, it causes a wave so massive that it causes an extinction event, much like the biblical flood. Yes, exactly. Okay. I haven't thought about anything beyond those plans, though.

That's pretty much it. Okay, well, I think if you stick with those plans, none of us have anything to be worried about thankfully um just you wait ryan i fucking do it cut to uh lightning and thunder clapping and striking you at the top of a mountain holding my fat grotesque mother i wouldn't be able to hold her ryan a little too heavy for that you're holding her in a crane that's being weighted down by a bunch of elephants and sandbags because the crane would tip off right right right I mean even still that's not enough

and so you're all stapled you're stapled to the chair and you have one of those fishing rods that fishermen use okay yeah to operate the crane claw as well to add some extra pull. And then I just drop her in the ocean and boom. How does that wave not?

Is this like a martyr event? Are you the martyr in this situation or are you safe? No, because if I drop her in the ocean, you know. It doesn't backsplash towards you. Yeah. Even though the wave would be so massive as to cause an extinction event. Well, Ryan. Even a splash would be so massive as to cause an extinction event well ryan even a splash would be like no mini like monsoon if you're out and even that wouldn't go backwards

if you're out at sea you can't detect a tsunami uh we were talking about how you were on a mountain so you're gonna be out on sea it's a mountain out at sea okay well you actually brought the mountain into it i always said i was on a boat. Okay, you're on a boat. Okay, how is the... Well, I thought a mountain would be a lot more stable to hold the big woman that my mom is. Well, she's buoyant. What type of boat are we talking here? Not a fisherman's boat. Just like a trawler. An all is lost type boat?

No, that's a yacht. I'm talking just like a trawler. Like what they catch crabs in? Yeah. Your mom's got so many crabs. You have problems with my mom being held up by a mountain a crane and a crane because ryan i can't but not a crawler a trawler trawler whatever if i if i drop her in the ocean from a boat i'll be in the ocean so i won't be affected by the wave

tsunamis if you're out at sea and a tsunami goes by it's not gonna like you'll just the water just rises up and back it's a little ripple it's the same thing yeah so she's just going to like, you'll just, the water just rises up and back down. It's a little ripple. It's the same thing. Yeah. So she's just going in for a dunk. She's going in for a. Nothing really happens around you. It just eventually that one dunk will cause a ripple. It builds man. Yeah.

The mass of pushing all the water away from her. Yeah. She does that to make sure she floats. Yeah. You ever like. Or sinks, I guess. You ever exhaled like all the air in your body and then get into a pool? Yeah. And you just like drop down.

I like just sitting down at the bottom, like looking around when I have goggles on. It's tranquil. It's freaky. But it's also like. Then your heart, then your heart goes. You can like. Oh, you know what's so cool? If you ever get into a really still bathtub and you're like laying there still, you can

actually see like the water pulse from your heart. Like you'll see like super microscopic like vibration on top of the water from your heart beating. Did that when I was in a Japanese bathhouse. Got into the cold bath and I was sitting there and the water was still and I could see the water like pulsating from my heartbeat. That's interesting. I didn't know that happened. Yeah. Happens in movies when something's pulsing underwater. It was doing that, but like just from my.... That's interesting. I didn't know that happened. It happens in movies when something's pulsing underwater.

It was doing that, but like just from my... Your heart. You ever take baths? Yeah. Actually, the way I take showers is I'll... Before I wash myself, I let the shower go and for like five or ten minutes, I'll

just sit down in it like it's in a bath and let the water rain down on me that's so nice my favorite thing man and then I'll wash myself and get out usually it's funny I actually do almost the same thing but reversed I'll get in and I'll what I'll do is I'll like

I'll you know I'll get the boring shit out of the way I'll just wash my hair real quick wash my body and then I'll sit down and I'll just like let that water just boom, just pour all over me. It's so relaxing. If you like put your head down and like the water is just going down your head. That helps when I get cluster headaches. Oh, it's great for headaches.

Just putting searing water on my head. I'm not kidding. That's like I turn the shower to hot and I just let the pain of the hotness take away from the pain of the headache to where there's no pain anymore because they're canceling each other out where it's like there's a moment of bliss when you have the best orgasm I believe what I get sometimes are cluster headaches because they're on one side and they are so debilitating for hours I had one in I had one in Japan yeah I remember 12 hours straight we to shoot. We were trying to shoot a certain video in Japan. And you were just like debilitated. And like.

I had to sit down. I had to constantly just chug water. For the video, you'd be able to like snap into a mode to be like perfect for the video. But the second the camera goes off, you would just be like, I'm going to die. And you'd just like sit down and cover your face. You guys need some fucking caffeine. It is interesting how like when you're filming something, how you can very miserable but kind of snap into that mode yeah because i think it's like you just gotta it's like i can i can force it out for this this take and if i'm distracted by this

i'll force it out it's not that much suffering i just have to fight through it's kind of like when you fight through sadness and you're like no i'm fine you know yeah but it's but but you got to take that moment to let it all out like when you would sit down on the sidewalk and just grab your head in your hands oh my dude it was awful i did not look like you're having fun like whenever i get those types of headaches they're like i have been brought to tears out of frustration because these headaches are so painful and last so long and i drink a shit ton of water. I take like medication to help out. Nothing works. And I just have to take the ride.

And it's not fun. What always makes my headaches go away is if I take a nap. But I hate when like the headache is too bad to fall asleep. No, it keeps waking me up. I'm like waking up. No, fall back asleep. And then the headache gets worse and worse. I'm like, I can't fall back asleep if the headache's this bad.

I don't think there's anything like a worse way to start your day than waking up with a headache. It's like, oh god damn it. That's why I'm glad that I don't have to experience hangovers. I don't wish hangovers upon my worst enemies. They are the worst. You get them like every time you drink. I get them. I'll have like one glass of wine and I'll wake up the next morning

like, really? Wait, really? You get hungover from one glass of wine? If I don't have enough water, yeah. You reminded me, I need to go buy some uh more wine i went to a really good natural wine store in silver lake and i got myself a cool little bottle of wine with harrison where the bottle was almost like a like a clay jar because it's made out of like the earth from the the vineyard so i was like that's pretty sweet and and i tried it and it was delicious natural wine. It was an orange wine with some, that skin contact. Yeah. We had that same wine. It was not, is it the same one? Not the exact same one, but it was a different one.

Same stuff that kind of, kind of the same stuff we had on our wine and cheese night, which we need to do another. We do. Let's do it soon. You know, we like to get together with the boys, get some, get some fancy bottles of, of natural wines, some interesting ones to try from different regions, try them all out, eat some cheeses. That's a fun boys night, if you ask me. Sounds like a fun boys night. I want to do it, like, tonight. Unfortunately, I'm super busy with Grump's work tonight.

I'm going to be here until probably 8 or 9, I imagine. That's fine. That's totally fine. I'm going to be here till probably eight or nine. That's fine. Not totally fine. Um, but, um,

uh, Tim, uh, no, it's fine, dude. Don't worry about it. Possibly tomorrow.

I'm busy. It's fine. I'm going to go get a suit cause I'm going to a wedding. Yeah. Yeah. Next Friday or Saturday. Um, that's cool.

Uh, don't worry about it next week. At some point I'm, I'm more than happy to get together and have some cheese and wine. Yeah, we'll figure it out when it gets closer. Jackson and I can go out and play some catch. Yeah. As you and Harrison, Harrison cooks and you prepare the wine and cheese plate and play rock band inside. Sure, man.

Getting yourself pumped up. Sounds actually super fucking fun, man. That sounds sounds like and it's all possible sounds like a dream night i have all of those things that can be done fuck dude let's do this next week before we go on tour like a little pre because we're all going to be on tour guys if you want to meet the tucker brothers they'll be at our show selling merch because harrison and jackson there are little monkeys we just make them do everything but um i guess it would make more sense if i said jackson and harrison because harrison shows up less than jackson at events that's true that's true but like Jackson. There are little monkeys. We just make them do everything. I guess it would make more sense if I said Jackson and Harrison because Harrison shows up less than Jackson at events.

That's true. That's true. But like fuck that sounds great. Dude let's do it. I just want to play I want to play with fucking Rock Band. Do it. I played Beat Saber for the first time at Ross's place. Is it better than Rock Band? It's really fun. So it is better than Rock Band. I don't know if it's better than. It's

comparable. Because it doesn't have the foot pedal. And you're not playing some classic ACDC or Metallica. True, you're playing just like dubstep. That's my only thing. Oh, wait, really? Is it all just dubstep? Have you played Beat Saber?

Can't people download, like... People can upload their own songs. Like, you could do the Star Wars theme. Ross said you need some... I punched the mic now we've both done it i did it in that we sports thing i remember that we're playing fucking we bowling and i just no i punched the lamp oh that must have hurt i should hurt it i mean if you go back and listen to that clip it's like it's a loud you can hear the of my hand just

my knuckles hitting the metal. And that scream. It hurts so fucking bad. It sucks when you hurt your hand because your hand's so fragile. It is. It's your tool that you use for everything. But Beat Saber is very fun except all the songs are just really like... It's like that. It's like Skrillex.

But it makes you feel good when you're playing it. Yeah. Would you call it a high intensity workout? No, absolutely not. But it definitely gets the blood flowing. It gets it. Yeah. Would you call it a high-intensity workout? No, absolutely not. But it definitely gets the blood flowing. It gets the blood flowing, but would you say you're out of breath? I didn't find myself out of breath. When Ross played it, he was really playing it up.

He was like... Wait, really? I'm 100% serious. But you're like, oh shit, it looks intense. And then you play it and you're just like... I mean, I did hard my first time. Is it one of those things that's like, you can play Just Dance to its fullest extent. Where you can be like...

Or you can just kind of wiggle the remote around. Yeah, absolutely. Could you do that with Beat Saber? Could you just kind of... I think I saw a video of Ross doing it. Let me see. Is this it? Gallop might know what I'm talking about.

No, never mind. That was just me zooming in on Ross's gray sweatpants where you can see the crown of his penis. He likes doing that. Yeah, he does. He likes showing off the bellend of his cock through his sweats for some reason. He comes in the office and like some days he'll put a little water on it so it really stands out. Yeah. And it's like, huh.

Like there was one time, remember when he even got like a like a eyeliner brush and kind of like painted around the shadows to really like make the penis stand out yeah that was odd but hey more power to him we love you ross it's a small penis what objectively it's objectively a small penis now don't don't go dissing the man how's that a diss man on a podcast oh you're right you're right it's i've been so i've been so accustomed to male aggression talking about how the size of my penis matters that i have to remember that every penis matters every size matters all pen. Like, we have to remember like, all penises matter. All penises matter, guys.

Hashtag cock brigade. Cock brigade. That sounds horrible. Hashtag cock brigade. I, uh, guys, penis size doesn't fucking matter. Matt would know. Like my friend's dad once told me in high school,

it's not the size of the ship, it's the motion of the ocean. Your friend's dad? My friend's dad once told me in high school. It's not the size of the ship. It's the motion of the ocean. Your friend's dad told you that? My friend's dad did tell me that. Told me that in high school. He was making you feel better as he was... I was like, damn, this kid's got a small dick. No.

Fuck, but he's so... Hey, guys, we just had to cut back in. You could tell exactly where we had to cut off the conversation there. That bit started getting a little out of hand. I't know where you're gonna cut it but i'm sure people will be able to tell where that one was going about a grown man you know what's weird on the last podcast we talked about was it the last podcast we talked about daniel tosh still like tosh.0 still going on probably after i said that all of a sudden all my youtube recommendations were tosh.0 like new episode stuff oh shit well he's still very popular.

He's a popular man, apparently. He'll never be that. Oh, something from last time podcast as well. I got a little upset and I called the other band members of Queen. Divas. Divas. And some people really got upset with me because they thought it was unfair. And I just want to say I i was i was coming from a

place of great emotion because i think the movie could have been better and sasha baron cohen would have made a better movie absolutely but the band members didn't like the fact that it wasn't about the whole band and that it was just about prince so that's where it kind of came from when they're divas. Prince? Huh? Prince? Prince. Queen. That's great, dude. They should have just had Prince replace Freddie Mercury. Yeah, there's Prince and there's Queen.

Where's King, dude? I got to remember. Queen's a queen. Queen's a queen. Queen's a queen. Anyways. Uh-oh, Ryan. What? Whyyan what upset those

queen fans they use queen and i just thought about it you know how they have like queer eye yeah what do you think would happen if like there there was an episode like you get them to come to my place and try to get me a do-over and they all come through the door and i'm just like what's up queers like do you think that would that would be a bad start no no but like you're fully unaware you're tone deaf you're just like smiling you just think that because the show's called that it's like hey and they're just like uh well i don't don't call us that okay well uh this isn't gonna work it's the name of the show right guys come on guys he doesn't he doesn't know any better just a bunch of queers no ryan don't don't say that don't say that what do you mean

the show is called queer eye don't refer to them as what don't say that say what's up guys what's up uh friends my fellas like that well What's up boy. Let's not do that one either. That I don't really need to explain that one, but we don't, don't need to get into that one. Just say, Hey guys.

So I should just greet them like they're normal people. Absolutely. Hey guys, what's up? Do you remember playing? Like I legitimately remember playing a game called smear the queer. Yes. Growing up.

I played it. And I never thought of it as, like, I just thought that's what it was called. I never thought of it as, like, a derogatory term for, like, a gay person back then. A grown person in my family would always ask the kids if they wanted to play Smear the Queer. And I believe we played it in gym class once. I did as well, like, in school. Smear the Queer. And I believe we played it in gym class once. I did as well, like in school. Smear the Queer. And I'm like, really?

There's one teacher who's like, they said it by its nerve. Or you guys might know it as Smear the Queer. It's like, all right, well. It's like, okay, that sounds fun. So it would be weird because you're all going like, okay, who's the queer? Oh, no, I'm the queer. It's like, oh, wait. Jackie like, okay, who's the queer? Oh, oh, no. I'm the queer. This guy. It's like, oh, wait.

Oh, oh, oh. Jackie's the queer. Jackie's the queer. Get him. Wait, isn't the whole point like whoever has the ball, you just have to tackle them? Yes. Why was it called that in the first place? I don't know.

And why did that stick around? Like why in like 2014 in high school my gym coach is like, yeah, let's keep calling it this. Just call it football uh ball tackle game yeah uh but i just remember the first time it ever clicked with me like the name of that game i was like oh i see that's bad i uh i think they said it on spongebob once it's mr craven vivid memory of mr crab saying there's no way mr crab said queer my mom said when she was growing up, that was like, her parents told her that that was like one of the worst words you could use. That and the, you know, obviously the bad one. Queer's been taken back 100%. Yes.

Oh yeah, absolutely. The queer community. Queer eye. Queer eye. When you talk about it, like, I remember back in high high school it would probably be deep or maybe middle school i just remember there was a point in time where like if i was like yeah so the queer community people would be like whoa well yeah because because it was a uh you know for so long it was used as a word to uh hate on gay people so it's like why are you hating on gay people i think it's it's kind of cool it got taken back i think it's super cool it's like yeah now

now i now we say it you know i'm saying how come they get to say it and i can't yeah what the hell guys the thing is i can't you can say it because you can legitimately talk about the queer community if it would you ever want to be done over on queer eye no because they're getting they get into your personal life a lot and i'm not I'm not about that I don't want I don't want that you know what I mean like they'd be like so you know you seem very down you seem like there's a lot of weight on your shoulders

Ryan like what's going on there and I'd be like I'd be like I don't want to talk I have a therapist that I talk to I don't want to talk about it with you guys um they just hand you a script say this stuff oh um i really don't want to talk about that that's actually like a very personal tragedy that i don't want to kind of like all right we have scenario a b and c which one do you want which life tragedy that's a great show though it's it's very it's like a super feel-good i watched my favorite episode last night. What's your favorite episode? I got to find,

I want to find the exact title because like, okay, I'm going to sound like, I don't care how I sound when I say this, but this man that they were fixing was the most adorable man. And he filled my heart with so much warmth and joy. It's the same feeling that I got when I watched the unraveled dude on the E3 stage. Right, right, right. Oh, my God. This dude. Okay, let me see.

Let me see. It was, it's called Lost Boy. The Fab Five go back to camp to help a scraggly outdoorsman put down roots and create a cool home for his teenage son. Oh, that's nice and like the the guy in it who they're redoing or revamping uh is just like you can it's like you see him and you can tell where he was at when he was a young boy you can tell what kind of a young boy he was yeah almost and like he's kind of very timid it's like you should smile more and he does this like he'll smile and go right back to not smiling he'll be yeah he'll be like yeah like it yeah, like it's, it's,

it's so, it fills me with so much warmth watching that episode. Like I almost don't want to go back and watch it because I was thinking while I was watching, I was like, I might shed a tear watching this. Really? Not because of that. They're redoing his life,

but because like just seeing the confidence building him throughout the episode and seeing what kind of person he is. He's just a sweet person. And it's just like, it's, it's heartwarming. Yeah. It's just heartwarmingwarming to see to see a very to what seems like a very genuine oh my god your veins look fucking freakish on your arm oh yeah keep that i gotta take a picture holy shit

dude jesus christ that's that's what happens when your arms are skinny jesus dude that's fucking crazy i'm do you let me see crazy. Let me see the picture. Let me see the picture. Do you mind if I put that in the podcast? Oh, my God. What the fuck? I know. Oh, my God.

That's disgusting. Can I please put that in the podcast? I think a big part of that's the lighting, but also because I have such skinny arms. Jesus. Can I get your permission to put that in? Yeah, go ahead. There's the picture. Look at the screen.

That's my... Wow. Am I like... Fucking Lord. That's the little, look at the screen. That's my, uh. Wow. Uh, am I like. Fucking lord. It's a family tree. Am I like transforming right now into some like bean? It looks like you're transforming into a plant. See, this arm's fine.

Those are the roots. Yeah, that arm's perfectly fine. It's probably because of the angle I have this arm is cutting off the circulation and then the light is kind of harsh on it. God. I don't know why. Look at this. Looking at, looking at your arm specifically that arm is making me realize just how how quick life could be taken away like you could accidentally

just like something could happen it could slice through your arm in a way and not even go that deep and all those veins are cut and it's just like you're passing out within a few seconds and you're done is this the big one right there? Is that? Wait. That one. It goes through right there. Oh, that's like one, two, three, four. Dude, you got veins. Do you ever think about how weird that is? Like the layers of your body, you know, you got the bones, but then you have on top of that, like your whole body, you have this crazy like highway of tubes that just send

blood through everything. It's back and forth. It's really cool. It's so fucking cool. There's this interesting picture that i saw i think it was um like a skeleton in a 300 pound person's body i saw that too and like seeing how the body like because the skeleton doesn't change but you watch how it like morphs around like you see it and you're like oh my god that's like it makes me want to be healthy because it's like yeah i am putting extra weight on this frame that i have

like your frame doesn't change and i know like it's like oh duh ryan but it's just one of those things where you know it but it solidifies it when you see it type of thing yeah like um i mean like the whole nerve system like the nervous system fuck the nerve system sometimes it feels like i'm being like bit by a bug and also i'm like what was that and? And then I scratch and it's like, oh, that was just a nerve being stupid. Oh, when it's like, yeah. Like you get those sudden little like pricks somewhere. I, uh, what are those? Do we know what those are? It's just like a nerve firing off being, being dumb, you know, goofing. Isn't there a thing like this? Uh, they don't know how to explain it. Maybe they do, but like all of a sudden, like your nerve endings fire off and it, and it's like so fucking

excruciatingly like painful. I can't remember remember what it is but i remember it's like your nerves are reacting to nothing oh my god but they're acting as if you're experiencing like something very painful i that i don't want it i didn't want to know that and i'm gonna be terrified it's just gonna be like enjoying my day like ah could today get any better just like all of my nerves at once like the most excruciating pain that that might be a made-up thing but if it's not that sounds horrible i know it's not made up brain aneurysms dude brain aneurysms are horrifying that's how uh i think uh some people some of my uh higher up family members have died from aneurysms apparently amelia clark has had two

brain aneurysms while working on Game of Thrones really yes I know but they can be stress related isn't aneurysm it's it's basically just when a blood vessel in your brain pops right that's why I'm I'm honestly scared when I play like when I'm playing Sekiro sometimes I'll stop and think or when I'm playing a really hard game like Cuphead at some point and I'm like if this is causing me so much stress is it possible that I'll just get a brain aneurysm and all of a sudden like someone will come to my house and because my xbox isn't gonna like turn off they'll come to my house see that I was playing Sekiro see me dead on the floor and be like yep another one uh bites the dust video games one humans zero dude I just fucking

like aneurysm scared the ever-living shit out of me because it's like it can just happen to anybody like at any time well i don't like our age that's not common of course like aneurysms happen maybe uh later on i forgot uh there's something that like really elevates your risk for an aneurysm and i i don't remember what it was um i don't know like just like smoking and drinking and stuff like that naturally increases your levels as life goes on for heart attacks, strokes, aneurysm. I was about to say, smoking increases... I don't think my family has the best history when it comes to heart. Same.

My family has some pretty bad heart stuff. It's a good thing we stopped smoking. Yeah. Now, okay, I'm not going to lie, guys. Look, I know you're going to call it cheating, and I really didn't quit, but when I was in Japan, we were at a bar,

and we were drinking wine, and every now and then, I would pop one off just because it was a nice little moment. It's vacation. I didn't bring it back home. Nope. I didn't bring the habit back home.

It stayed in Japan, but I feel like i need to be honest where it's like yeah i haven't smoked a single cigarette no same way we we all all four of us when we be at a bar for that that that mood that atmosphere like when we went to the bar from lost in translation it's like well we got we got some whiskey you gotta have a cigarette have a nice glass of wine some fucking uh some nuts some Some nuts and... What are they also called? Are they just a bunch of nuts? Just a bunch of nuts.

A bunch of nuts. Is a cashew a nut? A cashew is a nut, yes. They're just all nuts. Mixed nuts. Mixed nuts, yeah. Mixed nuts. And I really, like, the first time I tasted a cigarette again, I was like, fuck, these

are gross. I forgot how fucking awful these are. But for some reason, when you're drunk, you taste the cigarette less. Or I do. You taste alcohol less when you're drunk. And that's how you get more drunk. Because, you know, if you're fully sober and you do a shot of, like, let's say scotch or whiskey, like, that's horrible. But if you're, you know, really drunk, you do a shot of whiskey, like, you just don't even really taste it.

Because your faculties, your facilities begin to shut off the more drunk you do a shot of whiskey like you just don't even really taste it cause your faculties your facilities begin to shut off the more drunk you get you know yeah you wanna read some ads let's read some fucking ads okay last night it was 2 in the morning and I have to say I ordered myself a small coke and a

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That's megacast.robinhood.com. Well, that's all the ad reads for this episode, guys. Let us know if you prefer it if we just do them all in one chunk. Yeah. Like one block of the podcast instead of spreading them out. We don't know what you guys want more. What's easier for your listening? You know what I want to do again soon?

I want to go camping. That would be nice. I'm going to take you camping. Bring some Tang. I think I want to get healthier being hiking, being fit hiking condition. Let's work out, let's fucking because last time we went god damn that that walk killed me i was miserable i was a big chunky boy who smoked all the time and uh my cardiovascular health was not wonderful so you get it better though

walking up that trail i remember you you were you were tired like the halfway through the second day when we were walking back you were just like i just walked ahead of yeah you were just like i was just like because i have it in my head basically i with a lot of things this happens if i have something in my mind if it's like there's an end point and then like in my head i'm like okay so it's going to end it at some point and it will end and there will be a point soon where i'll be at the car or i'll be driving back or there'll be, you know, soon it'll be two days later and I won't even remember this walk that much. But right now this is, this is miserable and I just want it over with. So to get there as fast as possible, I'm going to do nothing but walk and walk and walk, not stop, not talk, not do

anything, not look at my phone. I'm just going to just dig down. Get it as close to the present as possible. That's how I think about things too. I do the same thing. Like if I'm just going to just dig down. Get it as close to the present as possible. Yeah. That's how I think about things too. I do the same thing. Like if I'm on a drive that like I hate, I'm just like, well, you know what? Every mile per hour I go faster and every like car I pass, et cetera, is like one car closer to get me there sooner. Like, so that moment will be the present reality sooner than not. Do you ever think like when you're in a miserable, cause as I was saying, like when you're in a miserable situation,

do you have the same thought of how you will eventually, like, it'll be like, oh, I'll be just eating dinner tomorrow and I won't even be thinking about this, like exertion of energy. Yeah. You just forget about it. It becomes another trial in the thousands and thousands of trials

you face every week, you know? But in. It becomes another trial in the thousands and thousands of trials you face every week. But in the time, it sucks. Yeah, like I was driving from Irvine to Glendale, which for those of you who don't know, Southern California traffic ain't too nice. That was about a two and a half hour drive because I ran into rush hour and there were wrecks along the way. But my AC in my car is broken. So it was super hot and the sun was directly coming straight in my window on me and there was nothing i could do to cover it up because it was like the angle it was coming at so i just sit there in like standstill traffic and like just

stop and go traffic while the sun is just roasting me alive and i'm drenched in sweat gotta fix that ac brother i got to well i haven't like it was ages ago on a podcast I was talking about remember how I we were in the car together and I smacked my my front bumper is it still from that yeah but I haven't needed to get it fixed because it's been winter so it's like I haven't needed to use my AC so I just still get it fixed just because it's broken though yeah I know but it's like I don't need to do it this week because I got other shit on my plate uh and I'll take care of it when it's more timely that That's been, it's been months. Well, it hasn't been hot, so I haven't needed like AC, so I just haven't thought about it. But now,

now that I needed it the other day, I'm like, whoop, time to get this fixed. Did you get it fixed? Not yet. Are you going, when are you going, next week are you going to get it fixed? Probably, yeah. I need to get a haircut. If I need to, if we're talking about chores and shit we need to do, I need to get a haircut for the wedding so I look good.

And for the tour and for you and for you fans. Yeah, dude. Mostly for the wedding. So I look decent. You look snazzy. I still think you should go to the wedding. In a gorilla suit? No.

I mean, that'd be good. But you should go as like just in one of those T-shirts that looks like a tuxedo and then gym shorts. I think I should show up in a bright white tux with a pink flower and a white top hat and a white cane. I should show up and just kind of stunt on everything. I have really nice cowboy boots with golden spurs.

Wear the white Tims. Wear the white Tims with the golden chain laces that we got on tour. I'll wear the Tims and add spurs to them. Ooh, spurs on some Tims? Yeah. All right, dude. That's how you nay-nay on those nudes.

I'll rock it. I'll rock it. I'll rock it. I'll rock it. I'll rock it. I'll rock it. I'll rock it like a dog out red. Rock it up the ass.

I can't wait to fuck a dog. So, yeah. Yeah, guys. Basically, that's all the time we got for this episode of the podcast. Sorry it's not over now. We're bye. And we're back. Sorry.

I didn't feel right ending it that way. So we came back to do three more ad reads. Nope. Just kidding, guys. We just wanted to say we appreciate that you guys listen to the podcast and that you guys support us. We truly do enjoy what we do. Like, I was playing. I don't care.

People will find. I don't care if it's a surprise or not. We were playing Sekiro for the channel. And I was just like, I really have fun playing this game in my personal time and I have fun playing it right now and it's like cool that I get to do that and I get to do that because uh people enjoy it and it's cool that people seem to enjoy us playing video games doing podcasts and and watching our live action that we release very few times a year but we have so much in the can right now oh Oh my God. We have so much. We have like 10 live action videos

we haven't released. I want to count them. We have a male video that I'm going to edit soon. We have like a tour. We shot a vlog while we did our Pacific Northwest tour and we'll probably do one in the Southeast.

Yeah. And then we have what, like seven or eight videos from Japan? We have probably like five or six, I'd say, right? Maybe. We'll see. We'll see. The thing is, we don't know.

That just lets you know. What about the other vlog that we've shot like half of, but things keep going wrong. So we have to stop. Yep. There's that one. There's a good vlog coming soon. But yeah, we have a shit ton of, fuck, we got to get on that. Yeah.

We got to find that footage too. You got to find that wedding footage as well. Don't bring that up in this podcast my sister texted me last night and she's like haha some people think that the wedding thing is just a bit but actually you're just an asshole brother is that what she actually said verbatim I wanna read

verbatim what she said cause I don't think she was that mean Matt I don't think she would be that brutal read it then okay anyways so she uh she says... Go past the nudes. Oh, okay, okay. Fuck, they're a lot.

Hold on. Why were you looking at them? Just go to the bottom. Okay, got them there. Nope, never mind. That was... Jesus Christ. Okay, there, at the bottom.

She says, legitimately, this is not a bit. The nudes? What I'm about to say isn't a bit okay um because i want i want to build some trust with our fan base because we goof them a lot it legitimately says lo oh it says yesterday at 5 58 p.m yeah lol people think the wedding video thing is just a bit little do they know you're really just an asshole ellipses then you just sent a winky face back oh I thought she sent a winky face

let me see no you sent a winky face back and then she didn't respond to you so she's probably just like god damn it that's pretty passive aggressive sis I think your winky was also pretty passive aggressive hey you know what if someone's gonna play that game I'm gonna play it right back you know I ain't taking no shit gotta stand up for myself Winky was also pretty passive aggressive. You know, if someone's going to play that game, I'm going to play it right back.

I ain't taking no shit. I got to stand up for myself. Someone wants to play that passive aggressive bullshit with me. Yeah, my sister, she thinks I'm an asshole, but if we ever do Texas shows... Have you looked for the footage since? No, I haven't. I have not looked for it.

I'm a busy man, Ryan. I got n looked for it. I'm a busy man, Ryan. I got shit. I got naps to take. Yep, yep. Shit to do. There's y'all's up to. At least I'm honest. You know, like I'm not going to lie about it.

Like, oh, no, I looked. I haven't. It's like, no, I haven't looked. I've been napping and doing my own shit. You know, it's like, yeah. You know what? She's waited three years. She can wait a few more.

For real. You know, at this point, it's not urgent. You know, I keep telling her I'll give her the wedding video as a 10th anniversary. They got to make it that far, though. No divorce. Okay. So it's kind of like I'm trying to make sure they stay together, you know? So I really do like my brother-in-law and I think they make each other very happy.

And he's a great guy. I've known him for what? Like nine years now or something. So it's like I like having him in my life and I hope I can continue to have him in my life. So as kind of like a, uh, to, to make sure that they stay together, I won't edit the wedding video. Okay.

I, I do want to make sure this podcast is under an hour cause, um, I want to see those comments that aren't, that are complaining about it. I'm sure we I'm sure we can push a little bit over an hour. No, I really am fighting to keep this one under an hour specifically. Okay. Well, let's end it right here, I guess. Guys, we're on iTunes, Spotify, everything else. Tickets for our tour still on sale. It's your one chance to see us.

I don't know how many other tours we're going to do. So supermegashow.net We have tickets on sale for the southeast And the northeast tours of the east coast of the United States And We're going to try to bring some merch soon Out on our shop hopefully Just we're busy boys

But hopefully later this year we'll be a little less busy And we can start pumping out a lot more stuff Yeah that would be wonderful And it will be wonderful. Absolutely. Y'all have a good rest of your day or night. Love you. Bye-bye.

Bye. Thank you.