supermegashow - EP 140 - Bible Brothers

Episode Date: May 17, 2019

We talk our departure from Game Grumps (and what's next), the first man to discover milk, and dive deep into the holy book. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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red pepper and Swiss or caramelized onion and parmesan pinwheels only at Tim's. At participating restaurants in Canada for a limited time. Oh, my Lord. Can you believe it? Another podcast. Still, every week we're begging. We're saying, God damn it.

I don't want to do one more week of this shit, but people keep watching and listening. Somehow, someway. We have to keep making it. So 140, I believe? Yeah. 140? 10 away from 150.

Almost there, baby. You know what that means. We get to end it finally. Yep. Hell yeah. Just like that time we said, Yeah, we're going to end it at episode 102. And then even my mom texted me and was like, why are you ending it?

I was joking. Stupid. Dumb woman. But welcome back to the Super Mega Podcast. The podcast where we come in every week the day before and have no idea what to talk about. Yeah. And ramble just whatever comes out of our brains while we sit and talk to talk about. Yeah. And ramble with just whatever comes out of our brains while we sit and talk to each other.

We do have a big announcement to make. This is legitimate, no joking. As of today, we are no longer the editors for Game Grumps. Yeah. We have decided that what we want to do is focus all of our time and energy into Super Mega. Yep. So we have resigned as the editors of Game Grumps.

After going on these tours recently and, you know, just doing more with the channel and kind of like stepping out more, stepping out more uh we kind of started realizing how like much you guys actually like like super mega and show your friends and stuff so we were like fuck man like it's been fun editing but we should just put honestly like if we could focus all of our time in super mega this is the only thing keeping us afloat now so y'all better uh y'all y'all better no no more paycheck so uh no more health insurance so uh we're we're taking a big risk you know we're we're very excited this is the first time i've been involved with a channel that had the potential uh to be self-sustaining yeah and i And I say potential because we haven't started yet, technically. Yes. After this day, we will.

And we'll see what happens. But hopefully it works out for the best. I'm excited. I'm very nervous, to be honest, because working for Game Grumps was a good safety net, right? Yeah. Well, good environment, good office. Yeah, it's great.

And it's also like but you know we have this channel uh that you know does make some income for us but at the same time it's like but you never know like if ads suddenly start sucking if people start watching or stop watching then it's like oh at least we still have like safety net of like a steady job so now super mega is our full-time job zero safety nets baby zero safety nets baby and zero college degree to go into this with yep so if it does fail neither of us can get a good job we might have risen we might have met our peak and we jumped off the boat too early yes or too late and now we are uh drowning yes i'm very confident i think it'll be good because the thing is if super mega is literally our only job now um are the only thing

keeping us alive you know the only thing we wake up in the morning for ryan nothing else no friends no girlfriends nothing super mega you and me no and me. No family. No family visits. No vacations. We stay here in Los Angeles and we work on Super Mega. Day after day. Day after day until we fucking fall to the ground with our frail bones and our wrinkled skin. Brow caked in sweat. And we breathe our last words, which which are don't forget to subscribe

and we both die together because we worked so hard yeah but hopefully this works out for the best we just noticed that the channel was getting to the point where it was just it didn't make sense if we wanted super mega to grow to continue I guess putting time like

a weekly a day you know you know like five day a week, coming to work type of job. 10 to 5 job, 5 days a week it's like, if we had the week open to work on live action videos and recording more episodes of gameplay and working on other shows and packing merch and making merch sales

cause SuperMega hasn't been a it is a priority in our lives, but I have to say if anything, because it's our job, and because you know, you have to be responsible if you have a job. Game Grumps always took precedent over Super Mega in a lot of cases. Yeah. And now we're not giving ourselves that quote unquote excuse. So it's just all us.

We got a lot of videos that we want to edit. We're going to be recording a lot more because now we're still going to come into the Grumps office and visit everyone and see everyone. But we're going to use it for now as a recording space as we try to build our own little recording space. They were kind enough to let us continue to use their recording space while we were setting ours up because we need to get like – this is big for SuperMegaGuys. Like jokes aside, we're going to get like this is big for SuperMega guys like jokes aside we're gonna get an office now we're gonna try to get like a little headquarters uh Jackson he uh he kind of runs some things behind the scenes to help us out now he's kind of like a behind the scenes guy to really facilitate things uh make it easier for us to produce more content and we got a lot of fun

stuff on the way so uh I want to give like the deepest genuine thank you to game grumps everyone there for how incredible the last three years were it's it has been the best working environment and you realize how lucky you are because you know you and i have had just kind of menial jobs in terms of you know you chick-fil-a me with like pool security slash cleaning and like food lion. And we, we worked for a channel before this, but it was pretty much just living with Mark in a house, you know, and,

you know, sometimes that environment isn't the best when it's an employee and a boss. But I think this was the best setup we could have in terms of keeping it very friendly, but also it's a job and we get we have to get the work done by specific time and all this other stuff so it was a i think it was healthy in that case in terms of it gave us structure and it gave us an environment that was a little more nurturing to our creative side yeah definitely going to miss it um very very bittersweet but i am very excited for this next phase of super mega entering the next era it's definitely a new phase i would call this

phase three yeah phase phase phase three baby we're in phase three ladies and gentlemen that's right first we started and then we were on grumps and now we're off of grumps. That is interesting. Think about it. It's like phase ones. We started it back in our apartment and we would stay up until 5 a.m. every night to get the videos ready for that day. God, do you remember the hustle, brother? I feel like I kind of want.

It was nice. Yeah. Here's the thing. I might take. I don't know how Justin would like this, but I might take some like one offs every now and then just to feed that creative side. But like at the end of the day, if I want to keep busy, let's just pump out that live action.

We have a bunch of Japan videos, which we haven't touched yet because we've been we've been busy kind of showing the new guy the ropes. Yeah, good old Ben. Ben, he's a wonderful new editor from the rap group Buckwheat Groats, which I love their music videos. So yeah, he's a super cool dude. Love him. Really talented.

But do you remember back like with the that hustle in the beginning, like how it was stressful, but at the same time, it was super like. Fulfilling in some way. I have like extreme nostalgia for that time period when you're building something that's the best part of a channel I think is when you're building it and we're still continuing

to build it but like that beginning there's nothing quite like just going into something blind creating this brand and kind of molding it because now we've gotten into the groove of what Super Mega is but when we first started we were like do we keep SuperMega just a Let's Play channel and then upload sketches to another

channel we were very confused of what SuperMega was going to end up being for our creative outlet but now it's it's this whatever this is whatever this shit is I mean I'm pretty comfortable in it I like it it's like sitting in a big pile of warm shit but it's comfortable yeah but. I like it. It's like sitting in a big pile of warm shit, but it's comfortable.

Yeah. But like, I don't know, dude. That was really fun. Like, that was one of the most fun times of my life, probably. Except for when we would record a game at 2 a.m., finish at 3 a.m., end the recording, and then find out that... It was just black. It recorded your desktop instead of the actual game. Oh, my God.

That happened twice in a row there were so many um in the beginning so many road bombs defeated we were that night the night right before i had to fly back technically morning because i remember the sun was rising the sun was coming up through my window while we were still trying to record let's play i was going out of town it was awful dude because that back then we uploaded two let's Plays every single day, like, without fail. And we, you know, it was a lot of editing. It was a lot of recording. But also, like, I was about to go out of town once. And we had to get, like, 17 videos done or something.

Yeah. I think it was when my sister was getting married. And I was going out of town. And we just had to record so much. And then we did this, like, hour and a half session of like organ or that zombie game organ trail I thought the ones that we lost we lost organ trail but I remember the big one was binding

of Isaac oh my god after we did like a perfect run it was so good and then it didn't we defeated I think we we beat mom yeah yeah and I was like oh I wish I wish we could somehow dude I bet we still have the audio for those really where though i have an old hard drive with like everything from the beginning

of super mario i kind of want to see if we can find just the lost episode but i don't think we figured it out until after we shut off recording yeah that's when we figured it out i it was afterwards oh my god but like i remember basically our, uh, wake up every day at 3 PM. Uh, go, go downstairs and get some food. Either get like, it would either be what? Probably Hawaiian barbecue or sushi. Yeah. Cause there's, oh yeah, there was the rotating sushi bar nearby.

So we get sushi. Or king taco. Oh yeah. Or that taco place. And we would like, um, go back upstairs and just be like all right what are we uh what are we doing for tomorrow's uploads oh well we'd spend a lot of time looking at the comments and stuff and be like oh dude people like it wow oh really people actually like it wow our fans are so nice yeah and now we look at the comments i'm kidding i love you guys and we we get just set up and then we spend the entire

afternoon evening like playing doing early super mega let's plays and then at like 10 p.m when we're done or 11 p.m because we take breaks and we go to get dinner and we kind of like go out i think sometimes just walk and kind of just stretch a little bit and feel that good old sun in our skin yeah and then at like after it's all done, I would take one of the videos and Ryan would take one of the videos would just decide who wanted what. We edited the fuck out of the videos. Like we cut them up in terms of editing. Like we

would turn, we tried to, I remember in the beginning, I think we would always be like 10 minutes or less. We want these to be short, quick videos. Oh yeah, we wanted them to be under 10 minutes. Yeah. And then we were like, fuck, that's not enough. You know. Yeah. And then we were like fuck that's not enough. You know? Yeah. Like I personally like longer episodes cause it's just

like. Well I remember when we started it was much more highly like with the edits. Very fast paced. A lot. Like if you look at today's episodes versus the episode like they're a lot more chill but it's because we got better at like commentary like

podcast conversation casual conversation because in the beginning we were so bad at it that we had to edit it non-stop and that's honestly why they were so edited in the beginning because we just had to just cut so much because it wasn't funny we were used to talking all the fucking time you could probably catch that even in the first few episodes of the podcast if you want to go take take a good old time machine three years in the past yeah three oh yeah over three years do we even bring up that i think it's while we were on tour so we didn't get to talk about it super mega is over three years old now oh yeah we we celebrated it was the day of not the orlando show it was the day uh was it atlanta the atlanta show the day of the atlanta show we hit three because i made you a cake you made me a delicious cake

on stage and that shit was nasty. Yeah, I threw up. Yeah, you did. I threw up twice on that tour. On stage. Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen. I shattered my tooth.

And that's again, like thank you to everyone who came out to those shows. Yeah. Seeing all of you there, like it's, it's heartwarming. It's bonkers.

You know what I'm saying? It's bananas. And this next tour in this month. Yeah. We will see a lot more of you. Very excited. And then we got, you know, we did that forever and we were exhausted. We're going to be exhausted after this one. This one, we don't even have a rest day.

Yeah. Well, the rest day is driving. Well, that's why I don't even call it a rest day because we're going to be driving for eight hours. Yeah. So we have six shows in a row oh it's great and it's fun but it does take a toll so we're going to try to get backlogged

with content for while we're gone we can record so much now we used to only be able to record once or twice a week because it would have to be when no one else was using the gangmas recording room and we couldn't record just during a work day we had to be like you know do it a certain time because if you remember didn't we have a time where it was like the grumps had to record here ross had to record steam train then also chris had to record only plays and suzy had to record

kitty cat gaming yeah and so we only had one day out of the week i think it was thursday you and i only had one day out of the week to record and it was Thursday, you and I only had one day out of the week to record. And sometimes we just wouldn't be in the recording mood. Because I think the thing that Matt and I, when we do Let's Play recording is sometimes we'll have to record when we don't want to. But for the most part, if we don't feel like it, we'll just end

a session early. Or push it to another day. We just don't want to force it. It's just going to be very... Exactly. I'd feel shitty. I'd feel unfunny and i'd feel like bad for giving people bad content like we don't want to torture us as well as you guys yeah because like you'll be able to tell if it's not good but there's been times where we've done the podcast we've just been exhausted and we're just like oh i don't want to record the podcast today i know and you could probably tell in certain episodes where we're a little more low energy.

But yeah, it's cool. Well, you're talking about the phase three thing. You know, it's like that was the first phase. And then we, it was that period where that was our job because we weren't working for Mark anymore and we hadn't started at Grumps yet. So it was that month or two period where it was like. And seeing our future dwindling as we realized

we weren't making enough money to live out here. Oh, my God. It was like not sustainable. We were like, but we were hoping we're like, OK, but that's what drove us so hard, too, was like, we got it. Let's get bigger so we can make a future for ourselves out of this. But then, like an eagle, American hero and Let's Player Aaron Hansen swept the two boys up. And he said, you boys are coming with daddy now. Aaron Hansen swept the two boys up.

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That's why it sounds so fucking good. And then we got to kind of just incubate Super Mega as we did that. And now here we are ready to hatch really yeah we're pecking at the shell right now we're getting that it's like you know you know that scene in any movie where it shows whether a dinosaur or a chicken that one little yep right when it first comes out that's what's right now right that's perfect but because it's not going to be an instant like, oh, my God, the channel is so much better. But it's I think you'll notice it over time because we still need to get a studio. We need to like figure out game plans, not be bored with our days.

Yeah. Not be lazy. All that shit. So it's going to be a slow kind of burn build up. But I think we can do it. And I wanted there's a lot of shows I want to do this year. I really want to do a Dungeons and Dragons show on Super Mega. That would be good. Like a live action one where it's like you can see us's a lot of shows I want to do this year. I really want to do a Dungeons and Dragons show on SuperMega. That would be good.

Like a live action one where it's like, you can see us with a camera, not just audio. And there are a few other games that Matt and I definitely want to play together. There's, I'm not going to give anything away, but I, there's this one game that we want to play where we, it'll be filmed much like we filmed PUBG. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll both have two perspectives and it's a game we hope you all enjoy. Dude, I say we do some face cam with that one. Really?

I say every episode has face cam. Okay, we'll see. We'll talk about it. I think it's because we can dress up. You know what I'm saying? We'll talk about it, because I'm thinking we could... Here it is. Here's the part of the episode where Matt and Ryan just kind of –

The creative process. Yeah. I'm inspired. Not 100% of the time face cam on it. I'm thinking it can cut back sometimes to face cam. I'm liking that, yeah. You know what I'm saying? You guys have an exclusive front row seat at a super mega business meeting.

This is where the ideas really come to fruition fruition where the creative juices are sloshing around but we wouldn't start this for a few months there's a lot we gotta do before we can dive into the bigger stuff the thing is we don't have a place to work right now we found the most perfect office in the world

and it got someone had their application put in first so they went with them and we were we put a better deal but i know we we were like really we like we were probably about to bankrupt ourselves to get this place it was just perfect honestly it's good we didn't because now we can go off on our own and have a little more of a safety net in terms of like finances for super mega but okay i mean it's it's it's better than uh it's in the works just think just think of it right now the only places

we have to work are our homes and recording at the grump space so and uh ryan and i are lazy a lot well we live separately so yeah you know it's not it's not like we're a five minute walk from each other we each have like personal lives so figuring like, when the other person's free, you know, shit like that. So I'm not saying it's going to be a rocky period because we're going to still be recording a shit ton of Let's Plays, but just give us some time to figure our shit out together, and we'll keep you guys updated. It'll be a fun little adventure. It's like now it's just all of us. You know, we used to have help from the Grumps in terms of supporting us,

and we still do have help from the Grumps in terms of supporting us, and we still do have help from the Grumps because they're thankfully giving us this recording. Not giving it to us. We own it now. They're letting us record in the Let's Play room. But, um, it's just Matt. Boys now.

Matt, me, Don, Justin, Jackson, and you guys. Yeah, let's do it. Let's make some fucking history on YouTube, guys. All right. Let's be number one. Let's hit a million before 2020.

That would actually be so dope. I would love that, but we'll see. I don't know. Because the thing is, that doesn't correlate to, like, really anything but just getting a plaque. But I would love that plaque Daddy wants his plaque You and I have each on our own merits

gotten, cause I got one for Syndigo, you got one for Kids With Problems for the 100,000 and then you and I got another 100,000 together with Super Mega and it looks different from the other two and it would be nice to just have that million for Super Mega.

Yeah. I love how we've never just hung these things. They just, like, sit on a desk collecting dust. Kids with Problems is above your toilet in your bathroom. That's the only one I think I've hung up. And then Cyndago's is right next to my desk. Yeah, oh, yeah, you have it. At the Grump Space.

And then the Super Mega one has been literally sitting on a shelf, just, like like collecting dust behind a bunch of action figures behind a bunch of like amiibos and shit just sitting there well auction it off guys you can have it for $10 it's just a piece of cardboard with like a

plastic youtube play button that's painted to look shiny it's not real metal right we should take it out of the the glass frame and see what it is okay like melt it down and see if it's worth any it's like real actual platinum i wonder i think someone has melted down their play button before so it's metal i don't know i don't know i don't know i do not know see the first one you were sounding like oh no that sounded mean so then you threw in a whole bunch of other uh i like that did it sound mean yeah it's like i don't

know i don't know i think i think that's my usual tone isn't it why are you so mean to me right you give me bitch eyes you give me big bitch eyes i have big bitch eyes no when we were first friends i always was scared you hated me because i because like when i looked at you it just looked like i was like thinking about you like well when i'd be talking to you you'd give me this face like you don't care what this fucker says no like usually i'll try like just because it's it's how this uh social interactions work you'll find yourselves like copying the face, the facial, the facial animations that someone else is doing.

So like if someone's happy and smiling, you'll be like, okay, like ready to receive some good news. But if that goes on for like a long time, all of a sudden it's like, Oh no, the smile starting to look fake.

What do I do? Then you just try to mold it into just like a listening face. And then eventually sometimes my face is just listening to you, but it's not, it doesn't look excited i get it's not because i'm mad at you or anything i don't know how many times i have to say this because fans say it all the time it's like oh you just looked upset that's why i didn't come and say hi to you i'm like i'm sorry there was there's a video someone posted um when they met us in Japan. And someone was like, why does Ryan just look like he's mad? Oh, yeah.

I remember that video. I'm sorry. That's my face. Like, Ryan's perfectly happy and content on the inside. I am. Dude, let's get you a facelift. So you're always smiling. So it's like, it just like, they like staple your face up.

What would you do if I came in the office just kind of like, hold on. The most botched plastic surgery. Yeah yeah like your lips are all pushing my cheeks so all my lips up like your cheekbones are like you have implants like sticking like way too far out and they're like swollen and inflamed and like like you got your teeth like your jaw like air bubbles around my face like blood squirts out and like your two of your teeth are just like your teeth are all like merging together and like breaking out of your head you're like hey guys hey hey man hey buddy how you doing you're looking so good thanks man no i just uh got a facelift man yeah dude you look happy. If you look at these pearly whites, you know what I'm saying?

It's like ulcers all in your mouth. Like tool marks. I wasn't dipped in a vat of acid. I was just given poor plastic surgery. But would you ever get plastic surgery? The way I feel about plastic surgery is it's like I think that if you have the money for it and it's not like wasting money. Is it something you personally could see yourself doing? Because like for me, I personally like the look of an aging face.

Oh, yeah. No. Like the natural look of just an aging face. I like that too. Not like not something that's like just stretched. Well, there's plastic surgery when you can tell. But then there's little cosmetic procedures that are like real small scale stuff. Get rid of those crow's feet.

Yeah, where you'll never notice someone had it done. And I could see myself, if I had the money, I wouldn't see anything wrong with that. It's like, you know, you style your hair to like look and cut your hair to look a certain way. Yeah, Dan gets plastic surgery all the time. How else do you think he looks so young? I know. It's like, it's amazing. People are like, wow, he looks so young i know it's like it's amazing people are like wow he looks so young it's like yeah that's because twice a week he's he's in that chair what he's had like six facelifts yeah he got the crow's feet thing he got the uh he got the tummy tuck actually yeah he was getting that beer gut you know the reason he has no ass is because he takes the fat from it and injects it in his forehead yeah it's not he actually has no ass for that reason dan seems like

the type of guy to listen to this like aaron when we talk about him i could see aaron being like guys but dan on the other hand would be like assholes like what like people are gonna actually believe i get plastic surgery well it's because you do, Dan. I saw Justin, Tracy just kind of looking around frantically. Then Brent came back here looking frantically. He's probably looking for the Febreze that we gave him so he could really spray down his dick. There's probably a guest here and he's like, I got to spray my dick with that. Come on, let me see if they want something. Okay.

Check up on Justin and give us a Justin report. Actually, send Justin in here. Justin. Hey, buddy. You summoned me? Yeah, come sit down as Matt goes and does something. How you doing? How you spending your time right now?

I'm sitting in the Game Grumps 10-minute power hour. Is that what it's called? Did you see the old cheese that they still have in there? Yes. It's a big old block. Yeah, it's still in there. Yeah. Yeah, it's fun.

Did you smell it? No. You should. I'm afraid to. It's just cheese that's a month old, dude. There's no service here. I've resorted to playing a game called Snake vs. Block on my iPhone. I can hook you up to the Wi-Fi if you want.

That would actually be very helpful. Okay, here. Lend me that phone. Lend me your ear, Justin. Lend me your rear, more like. Shut the fuck up! Sorry, I'm sorry. What would I...

What does a shinobi dress like? Those red guys? Those are shinobis, right? I don't know what a... Dude. No one even knew the word shinobi existed until the game. Yeah, what is a shinobi? You feel me?

What is a shinobi? What does it mean to be a shinobi? So, I'm trying to see. Because, like, tonight, should we go out and get a really nice meal for your last night? Have you talked about... Did we talk about it on the last podcast? The reward. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Or should. Or should we do that McDonald's dinner. Because at the end of the day. A McDonald's feast sounds good. But it doesn't ring true for your last day here. I'm going to be back though.

You are. Which means you can be back and give me my McDonald's feast. Probably won't be for a while, though. We'll talk about it, I guess. I'm sure this is a very interesting conference. Oh, Matt's back. Yes! Shit, Justin, you're in his seat.

Get up, get up, get up. Get the fuck out of my seat! Fuck, dude. Here you go. Know your place. Know your place in this fucking company, Justin. They blocked Reality Kings, so... Yeah. They put a King, so... Yeah.

They put a blocker on the internet. Did they have Bang Bros? Yeah, they have Bang Bros. That gets through? They do not have Bang Bus, though. No, they don't have Bang Bros. I tried yesterday. What?

It worked a week ago. I think Brent figured it out. They blocked it. All I need... Does UGIS work? Huh? Does UGIS work? UGIS?

I don't know. You should try that one out. Okay, I will. I'm pretty sure they got X and XX. They got X Hamster. They got them all, dude. Do they have X and XX Tentacion? Oh, shit.

There he goes. That's really disrespectful, Justin. It is. That's not cool, man. He's flipping us off. He's flipping us off again. Now he's doing the L dance. Yeah, he's doing the Fortnite L dance. Now he's flossing in the window. He's really good off. He's flipping us off again. Now he's doing the L dance. Now he's doing the Fortnite L dance.

Now he's flossing in the window. Now he did a Michael Jackson moonwalk. And tip the hat. Again, in poor taste. He's actually so good at flossing. We were at karaoke last night and he would floss when Ryan was singing. This is no joke.

He's been telling me I need to learn. Dude, just learn how to floss. I'm like, why? He's really fucking. He's been telling me I need to learn. It's because he's so young. I'm like, why? Because he's still a kid. Because it's funny. You should learn. There's no reason not to. Like, get a little Fortnite.

I can, I can orange justice now. It's not very good. Would you say you were a kid when you moved out here? By definition? Yeah. Yeah. I was 19. Yeah.

When I started. Man, I was only. Still thinking. I feel like I was a kid. We're still pretty young. I know, but I. Everyone in the office is like 30 something. I know. I feel, I was only. Still thinking. I feel like I was a kid. We're still pretty young. I know, but I. Everyone in the office is like 30 something. I know.

I feel, I felt like a kid when we started Super Mega. Even though that was just three years ago. You know? Yeah. I was 20. So young. Couldn't even drink alcohol yet. Just a big fucking baby, dude.

Took you two years before you drink alcohol. Have a little sip of the nip. Yeah. I didn't actually, I didn't drink until I was almost 21. That poisonous nip. I never drank as a teenager. The poisonous tit of nature. You know?

Yeah. Alcohol is literally, it's funny because you think by definition, it's like you shouldn't drink it. Because smell it, taste it, your body should just be like, uh-oh, that's not supposed to be consumed. And then you take it anyway and your body reacts because it's literally being poisoned. Yeah, then we took it a step further and then took a bunch of grapes, stomped on them with our gross feet, let it just sit there and age and turn gross. Just rotten fucking. Enjoyed by rich people? That sounds like that was a prank at first.

I know. enjoyed by rich people it's that sounds like that was a prank at first i know it's like it's like dude oh my god i'm gonna make this disgusting drink where i'm gonna step on these fucking grapes with my nasty ass toes mash them up let them rot in the sun for ages it's a poison that doesn't kill them but oh they're gonna feel it and oh it's so foul and they they finally they squeeze all that juice and they give it to him and he's like, this is so good. He has the best night of his life. More! I need buckets! It's like, how did they discover wine? How did they discover cheese? Milk?

Like, those are all those... Okay, here it is. Someone accidentally stepped on a grape. They walked around with it for a while. Oh, yeah. Then someone's like, you got something on your foot. He's like, what? He lifts his foot up. He's like, could you get that off? His friend licks the foot. He sucks his toes to get that off his friend licks the foot he sucks his toes yeah sucks his toes he goes whoa that tasted pretty good then they start walking five minutes later he's like i'm starting to feel kind of kind of right

he's feeling he's feeling fuzzy dude because this caveman was an introvert yeah he didn't he didn't go out and play volleyball with all the other caves no women but all of a sudden he's feeling like he could he's feeling you know courageous he's feeling like he could. He's feeling, you know, courageous. He's feeling, like, social. He's like, man, I'm feeling really positive in life. He really feels like he could crush the skull of any mammoth that dare cross his path. Nah, that's how wine was discovered. Actually, well, the thing about milk is, like, obviously people saw, like, a baby cow, like

a calf sucking the udder. Someone had to be the first to go, what if I did that? The first person had to... Do you think they sucked with their mouth? Yeah, it was like a fountain. You don't think that they like... Yeah, the first person probably didn't do it. They didn't know to squeeze and pull.

They were just like, okay, I'm going to suck on this big old nip. Do you actually think milk was discovered by someone being sexually devious do you think it's possible like like not for survival but someone was getting it on because getting kind of freaky with the cow and then they're like whoa that's good that's good stuff we could we can make a lot of food with this and drink it could you imagine the first guy that like whose wife, because this connects to it, whose like wife is pregnant and he's like really turned on and he just starts like fucking kissing her on the neck, really turning her on

really flicking her, flicking her labia. Flicking her caveman bean? Yeah. Flicking her labia around. Labia's just slapping back and forth. And then he goes in and then starts suckling at her teat and all of a sudden milk! He's like, whoa. What?

I mean, he just goes to town and he has the best dairy meal of his life. Dude, there's a place in LA. So then, I'm connecting it. Then he would look at a cow and be like, oh, those are titties. I could suck those as well. And he gets the milk. The guy who discovered breast milk also discovered cow milk. Same dude, believe it or not.

He discovered all milks. You know? Do you ever have images that just pop in your head and you're like, okay. Yeah. I have OCD. Of course that happens to me. What popped in your head though? Jordan Peterson sucking on a cow's tit

you see it goes straight to the source it's the most wonderful milk it's the most wonderful milk now clean your haystack what about Peter Jordanson dude Peter Jordanson I think there's an actual

thing where it's Jordan Peterson versus Jordan whatever Peter Jordanson or something like that where it's Jordan Peterson versus Jordan, whatever. Peter Jordanson? Peter Jordanson or something like that. And it's this video where he's just talking to himself and debating himself and shit. I wish my first and last name was made up of two names that can be switched like that. Peter Jordanson.

Jordan Peterson. Yeah. I mean, you could be like the Tucker brothers and have your first and last name both be first names. Jackson Tucker. Harrison Tucker. Carson Tucker. If it was Tuckerson, you could be like Jackson Tuckerson.

Tuckerson Jacksonson. No, I don't know. Yeah, dude. Tucker Jacksonson. There's too many sins. They're damn so stupid. Jackson Tucker. Idiot.

It was originally Tokarar and I believe it was Ukrainian Jewish or something what are you doing those are the best ones dude that was so funny man that was hysterical that really got me good was it bad that was the smallest shit I've well it wasn't a piece of poo poo

it was a fart it's flatul I've... Well, it wasn't a piece of poo-poo. It was a fart. It's flatulence. Ryan flatulated and I laughed like a schoolboy. Yep. My leg is fucking asleep, dude. Ooh, you cramping up or something? No, I... Do you...

If there's anything I hate more, like, I'd rather have a cramp than having my limbs fall asleep. Oh, it's the worst. I hate the feeling of the limbs falling asleep. There's something... It doesn't hurt, but it's the same feeling as, it's not the same feeling as being tickled, but it's the same kind of like, it doesn't hurt, but you want it to stop. It's uncomfortable.

You know the best way to describe it? It's like a... Sorry, I sometimes get violent with the limb that's asleep to wake it up. No, it works. I mean, you gotta, the way to get it awake is just move it a lot. You got to get the blood flowing again. Yeah. Because you cut off the nerve.

Because I just had it locked right here, probably under this leg. Dude, has your ass ever fallen asleep? No. Oh, it sucks. I guess because I have a really bony ass. It's usually my foot or leg. It's because I got a bony ass. So it's like skinny.

So when I sit in a car especially if i sit like this with my legs up on the seat my ass cheeks will fall asleep and that is a weird feeling when your ass cheeks fall asleep like it does not you're like what the fuck and you just have to walk around and wait for it to go away why did you just gyrate we go what the fuck oh because like i'm feeling it around yeah i hate my toes fall asleep every day like just in my shoes all the time my toes always fall asleep and they'll be asleep for hours. Some kind of fucking toes. Guys,

is that a, is that a problem? My toes will fall asleep for no reason. Like even when I'm barefoot, those fall asleep and then there'll be asleep for hours on end. Sometimes I don't know why. Like it could be because like my feet are fucked up or I'm putting pressure on the wrong parts of my feet when I stand. But it's like,

they just fucking go numb. Speaking of going numb, I'm numb. on the wrong parts of my feet when I stand but it's like they just fucking go numb Speaking of going numb. I'm numb wait with excitement about Harry's Harry's is for speaking of going numb. I'm numb with excitement for this deal from Harry's you stole my joke play it back Matt No, it's cuz we messed up the first. No you not know you do it you do it Do it joking no do it. No I don't do it. You already first- no you- no you do it. You do it. I was joking. No, do it! No, I don't wanna- DO IT! You already did it once!

Do the fucking joke! I wanna do it again! It'll make me feel better. Why? It'll make me feel better. Why? Just say, speaking of going numb. Do I- do I need to look you in the eyes and tell you I don't care?

Yes. Hold my hand. That you- you didn't even steal my joke. Doesn't matter. Fucking asshole. Fucking asshole. That's right, Matt. What do we love most about shaving with Harry's?

Well, let's be specific with our endorsement. I don't think I was supposed to read that. I actually tried it for the first time recently. Because, you know, I don't really grow a facial hair, but recently I let it get a little long. And I was like, you know what? Usually I use like an electric buzzer because my facial hair is not long enough to use like a real razor. I used Harry's. That shit was nice, dude.

It's so smooth. I'm scared of using real razors, but it's very lubricated. Yeah, okay. It glides so smoothly across my skin. Just join the 10 million people who have tried Harry's. Claim your trial offer by going to harrys.com slash super mega. Yep, that's it. Someone's- who's calling me?

Hey, Jackson. What's up, dude? I'm doing an ad read right now. It's for Harry's. Jackson, and it's actually crazy because I don't know if you knew this, but Harry's founders Retired of paying up for razors That were overpriced and over designed And they knew that a great shave doesn't come from gimmicks Like vibrating heads, flex balls

Or handles that look like spaceships Tactics that the leading brand have used to Raise prices for decades That's right Harry's bought a world Class blade factory in Germany That's been making quality blades for over 95 years. They've received over 20,000 five-star reviews, Jackson, on Trustpilot and Google. Wait, Jackson, you actually use a lot of the Harry stuff they send me.

Of course I do. And you like it. It helps me maintain my mustache and look good. You have a really good mustache. My face is clean. Yeah. Wait, Jackson, did you know that Harry's replacement cartridges are only like $2 each? That's half the price of Gillette Fusion Pro Shield.

Yeah, they just went for the throat with that one. All Harry's blades come with 100% quality guarantee. If you don't love your shave, Jackson, let them know and they'll give you a full refund. But you won't have to do that because you already love it so much. That's right. Get a 13-value trial set that comes with everything you need for a close, comfortable shave, Jackson. It's $13, baby. You get a weighted ergonomic handle,

five blade razor with a lubricated strip and trimmer blade. You also get rich, lathering shave gel and a travel blade cover. Listeners and Jackson can redeem their trial set at harrys.com slash super mega. What is it? It's harrys.com slash super mega. What is it?

It's harrys.com slash super mega. Make sure you know we sent y'all. So go get a clean shave. Sorry. That's fine. All right. Now that I'm off. Now we can talk about Indochino.

All right. Let's talk about Indochino. Ah! That broke my throat just now. Yeah, I can tell, dude. You got some... I'm grabbing my throat right now because that looks like it hurt. I got tears in your eyes.

You alright? That scream legitimately just broke my throat. I can't cut it out because then you would have done it for nothing. People need to at least hear it. Yeah. But while you recover, I can talk about how made-to-measure suits fit better compared to generic off-the-rack suits. You know, I actually had to go to a wedding recently. You know, they set me up with a wonderful quality suit.

You measured yourself. You sent them in. They made it. It fit you so well, dude. You look so handsome. I was doing this whole thing. The dusting off the shoulders? Yeah, the suits are so handsome. I was doing this whole thing. The dusting off the shoulders. Yeah, the suit's so nice.

Then I did this. Oh, yeah, the one quick off the collar. And, you know, it looked really good, and it feels great. In fact, I felt more confident when I put on the suit than I had earlier that morning when I was naked in front of my mom and stepdad. Indochino makes suits and shirts to your exact measurements for an unparalleled fit and comfort. Looking to get married? They have tons of options for those looking to outfit their wedding party.

Guys love the wide selection of high-quality fabrics and colors to choose from. Not to mention the option to personalize the details including your lapel, lining, pockets, buttons, and, get this fellas, your own monogram. That's right, boys. Here's how it works. You visit a stylist at their showroom. They have over 40 showrooms in North America and they then take your measurements personally or you can even measure yourself at home if you're an introvert like me. I helped you measure yourself. Then you choose the fabric inside and out. You choose your design customizations,

submit your measurements with your choices, then just relax while your suit gets professionally tailored and mailed to you in a couple of weeks. This week, our listeners can get any premium Indochino suit for just $379 at Indochino.com when entering SuperMega at checkout.

That's 50% off the regular price for a made-to-measure premium suit. Plus, shipping is free. That's Indochino.com using promo code SuperMega for any premium suit for just $379 plus free shipping. Dope, brother. That was wonderful. Good job, man. Yeah. Killed it with those ad reads this week. Yeah, we did. Dope, brother. That was wonderful. Good job, man.

Yeah. Killed it with those ad reads this week. Yeah, we did. Like always, man. Always fucking. I want to make a comp, like, people, I want to make a compilation of our ad reads because we fuck with them so much, but it's like, people get mad that it's just a video of ads. We brought this up before and I can't remember what people's consensus was.

I think people were like, yeah, and then they're like, well, we don't need to listen to the ad reads, blah, blah, blah. I don't know. It's weird. Yeah. And maybe if, uh, I don't know. I saw, cause I saw that someone was making one of their own and I was like, oh. Were they?

Yeah. Ooh. Someone online I saw was making like an ad read compilation. So I was like, huh, I wonder if like it's worth doing. Um, we just want to steal your compilations, guys. You make good compilations. Maybe we'll rip them from you. I mean, we'll give you a few bucks maybe.

I mean, I'm not guaranteeing anything. We'll give you $5. Nope. Make a compilation, $5. It's good business. It's good. Ryan, we're going out on our own own you need to start listening to my business super mega's wacky 5 second compilations

makes like 10 in a day god damn it Ryan I'm sorry I didn't think about that it just has the word compilation in it channel like bot uploads like 50,000 videos it's called super mega compilation this one's literally the movie Encino Man

except it just called super mega compilation this one's literally the movie encino man except it just says super mega compilation i watched uh the graduate for the first time actually i can't i was asleep i came in halfway and watched the second half of the movie watched i that's one of like for me it's always hard to think of how you begin a movie and end a movie how do you make it get it on a good path starting with some momentum or interest then how do you end it with either

leaving your audience having to think or leaving them feeling complete there's a lot of ways you can work with it having a really nice cut to black after something big happens type of thing i think and i think the graduate uh nails uh their complete ending yeah it's just like well like it just nails the ending in terms of like uh it gives you it's complete but there's also more to think about. Yeah, exactly.

Like when they're driving away and their faces are like, womp, womp. Yeah. It's a little like, why did that happen? It's like, hmm, maybe we're just kids and we don't know what we're doing. And we're making these giant gestures and thinking that it'll fix our lives and how unhappy or happy we are. It's good, though. Like, I only came in on the second half of the movie, and I still, like, fully got it all.

When the dust settles, you still have yourself to say hi to. I was like, this quote's going somewhere. That one was in the Bible. No, it's not. It's the first quote in Exodus. When the dust settles. Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, Deuteronomy. Are we having a Bible book naming contest? Here we go, baby.

Job. Psalms. Revelation. Songs of Solomon. Philip. Mark. Is Philip a book of the Bible? No

Yes I think Galatians Matthew James Luke Fuck There's some

There's some really small ones That no one gives a shit about Like Are you playing music out of your phone? What's playing? What's playing hell what is this God's like come on Matthew think it's inspirational for me where's this playing I don't know where it's playing on my phone hold on

what is this he said Deuteronomy he said numbers what is this playing out John who's Aaron Joffrey John that's a book. Did we already say Ephesians? Nope. Okay. Philippines. Or Philippines.

Philippians. Philippines. The Philippines. We already said Deuteronomy, right? Yeah, that was one of your first ones. Well, I mean, I listed a shit ton in the beginning. You did. So it's kind of on me. Now, Peter. Yeah, that was good.

Is Peter a book of the Bible? I'm not sure Philip is, but. Philip is not a book. I was thinking of Philippians. So take, so replace Peter with Philip. Okay, yeah, Peter. The book of Philip. Henry.

Nope. Yeah. There are really small books too. Arnold. Arnold 614 it's like it's like the worst why isn't there's that book of jesus because that's the new testament is the book of jesus trying to think of uh wait what's what are some of the smallest books of the bible man remember when we played bible man that's worth that that one's worth a watch, guys. That's like a 45-minute video, but we got pretty far in Bible Man. Damn it.

Okay. Ah, shit. You ready for this? Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, Deuteronomy, Joshua, Judges, Ruth, 1 Samuel, 2 Samuel, 1 Kings, 2 Kings, 1 Chronicles, 2 Chronicles, Ezra, Nehemiah, Esther, Job, Psalms, Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, Songs of Solomon, Isaiah, Jeremiah, Lamentations, Ezekiel, Daniel, Hosea, Joel, Amos, Obadiah, Jonah, Micah, Nahum, Habakkuk, Zephaniah, Hosea, Zechariah, Malachi. That's just the Old Testament, Matt. What? Now it's time for the New Testament.

Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Acts, Romans, 1 Corinthians, 2 Corinthians, Galatians, Ephesians, Philippians, Galatians, 1 Thessalonians, 2 Thessalonians, 1 Timothy, 2 Timothy, Titus, Philemon. So that could be Phil. What? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Philip. I just said Philip for short. Hebrews, James, 1 Peter, 2 Peter, 1 John, 2 John, 3 John, Jude, Revelations.

Fuck. What's your favorite one off that list? It would either, I think my favorite book of the Bible. Actually. it would either, I think my favorite book of the Bible actually is either going to be songs of song of Solomon or song of Solomon or, um, revelate revelations. Revelations is like an action movie.

It's fun. It's like Solomon is locusts and the sun goes black. And like, there's like meteors raining down and shit. And been like, what? Like, doesn't Satan or doesn't like God's army come down and like Satan

rides on like a stallion or some shit fucking seven head lion or something right and there's all these like beasts and dragons and in the end God fucking grabs Satan and swings him by his tail and throws him into a lake of fire for all eternity and yeah like that's sick dude what a conclusion to the Bible you know it's like

and then and then Jesus gets a bright cherry red Mustang that part it's so. And then Jesus gets a bright cherry red Mustang. That part is so sick with the Armenian flag spray painted on the back. Yeah. Dude. And then you find out Jesus was Armenian all along. Crazy twist. And also.

I didn't see that one coming. Yeah. I did not. Because I thought he was a Jew all along. I was like, well, what's with the Armenian flag thing? And the next thing you know, it's just boom. They drop it on you. Like Jesus.

His last name is actually Hanyasian. And the funny thing is, Justin White. He's doing this. What is this one? He says keep talking. It's the master of disguise. This is what you are doing. This is what I want you to do.

Great movie. I want you to name me a book of the Bible, okay? Just a book of the Bible. Give me a random one. Why? Just do it. Psalms. Psalms? Yeah. What are the odds before the? Just do it. Psalms. Psalms?

Yeah. What are the odds before the next podcast you have to read all of Psalms? See, Psalms isn't bad because it's like Psalms is like a collection of songs, right? Psalms. P-S-A-L-M-S. No, no, I know. But aren't they kind of like songs to be sung? It's like poetry.

Yeah, yeah. So like they're, it's not that bad. You probably learn a thing or two from reading that. But I have to read all, I have to read it all the way through for the next podcast. Okay. 15. 3, 2, 1. 13.

All right. You don't have to do it. I'll do one, too. Okay. Okay. Okay. We usually don't reverse it just out of, those are kind of like the hidden rules. Yeah.

But we'll reverse it. I'll do it, too. Choose a book of the Bible. You'll reverse it choose a book of the bible you want me to choose a book? yeah how about Micah I just picked a random one that no one

reads I'll do 15 I'll be fair 1, 2, 1, 7 I was going to say 6 but I got confused because I counted up and you counted down let's do it over again start at 15 again drop it down to 10 then, but I got confused because I counted up and you counted down. Let's do it over again. Start at 15 again. Drop it down to 10 then.

Really? Because I fucked it up. I think I fucked it up because usually we do three, two, one, and I did one, two, three. Okay. Sure. All right. One more time then. At 15.

Yeah. Ready? Three, two, one, two. Okay. I don't have to read Micah. We're good. You want to get Justin? Yeah.

What's the longest book of the bible hold on is it genesis justin justin get in here wait luke no we didn't we don't know which one justin come here he can choose one how about that but it can't be the name that we did okay name a book of the Bible Matthew Matthew, okay, Justin What are the odds that? Before you leave LA you have to read all of Matthew in one sitting 25 okay want to count us down right now who am I going against me? three two one four All right, buddy. Okay. You don't have to read Matthew

You got lucky man You have to read through the entire book of Leviticus Before I leave LA You do 25, I'll do 25 Leviticus is kind of fucked up 3, 2, 1 16 One off

That's weird because you and I did six and seven the uh the other time because we just did a weather the odds of the bible so we don't have to read the bible none of us have to fucking read the bible hell yeah sinners i say you brought this up ages ago ryan but you you said that we should make like super mega bibles like branded bibles and sell them and you and i should rewrite the whole bible in our own words bye justin bye a little troublemaker that kid he's doing drugs yeah oh by the way um matt and i got something wrong it wasn't abraham it was lot yeah but i think we got the story pretty much pretty much down yeah you got that down good. That was all new to me. We should do a new segment where we just tell Bible stories to the best of our memory from church.

Because Jonah's interesting because there's a lot more political things in Jonah than just him being eaten. It's him being eaten by a big fish, but there's more to it. And the only reason I know that is because I watched the Veggie Tales movie and I was like of Jonah and the Big Fish whatever it was called it's it's where Jonah Hill sits down and watches Big Fish on DVD really really

thrilling Ryan let's let's let's do another one on this podcast let's tell the mustard seed story oh I don't remember that one you tell it I don't remember that one you tell it i don't remember that one there's a it's the parable of the mustard seed i don't like that one okay pick another one then okay give me something historical that happened because i i did the lot story so this is gonna be yours okay give me something from the bible Okay. The burning bush.

Okay. So, I think this was Abraham, right? No. It wasn't Abraham? No. Okay. I think this was New Testament. Oh, right.

Abraham was old, tried to cut his son's cock off. No, he successfully cut the tip of his son's genitalia. Well, not the tip, the foreskin. The foreskin. I had a dream I had foreskin last night, by the way. That is the tip. That would have been the tip if you son's genitalia. Not the tip. The foreskin. The foreskin. I had a dream I had foreskin last night, by the way. That is the tip. That would have been the tip if you didn't cut it off. I had a dream I had foreskin last night. Was it great?

Yeah. Burning bush, Matthew. Moses. Yes. Moses. Yep. Mr. Mosby. He is having some kind of separation with God.

He's walking through the desert. He is sh some kind of separation with God. He's walking through the desert. He is shepherding. He's a shepherd, right? Yeah. So he likes his little sheep and shit. And one day Moses is out walking and just sees a bush on fire and it starts talking to him. And it's God talking to him through a burning bush, which sounds like something straight out of like Lord of the Rings or like RuneScape or something like World of Warcraft. Like the burning bush speaks.

It's pretty fucking sick. Why? Why? They just happen upon a burning bush. Yeah. He was like, hey, his bush is on fire. And it was like, hey, I'm God. OK.

Was I wrong? I don't know if I'm even right, but I only know what I know through the movie Moses. Or so what is it called? Prince of Egypt. Oh, yeah. I forgot. I used to watch that movie all the time. He's a shepherd.

One of the sheep gets off away from the flock and he goes and tries to find it. And then he finds it or he's while he's searching for it. He hears God's voice. And then he's like, how do i know you're real and then god to prove himself makes the bush catch on fire but not burn or some shit like that oh that's sick to prove that he's god he's walking off and you hear god i'd be like uh-oh this can't be good oh yeah you really god though yeah oh. Dude, I bet Moses just told people that. He was probably lighting up a joint or something. He's back there smoking a fat ass spliff and he puts it in the, like, he puts the ashes

in on the ground and it catches a bush on fire and he didn't want to get in trouble. So he's like, oh, God spoke to me through it. I thought I heard there is this one thing where, like, there was this plant that was popular and kind of like a hallucinogen back in the bible days and that's like how revelations possibly was written and explains some of the things like him seeing wait really was she like something was burning possibly and it was like making him think all this shit yeah so they were all just on acid it could have been every the bible actually just comes down to people were tripping balls

that is not true these people were very real Matthew Mark Luke and John and Phillip but tell me this Matt how did so many people write a story and it connects riddle me this hmm

I can't Ryan because I'm not saying the Bible's not real. But what I am saying is that it's epic as shit! Let's pull one out for the Bible, guys! The Bible! Yeah! Can't get enough Bible! But that's about all the time we got for this week? Yep. So thank you to the Bible.

Thanks to the Bible. Thank you to all of you for watching. This episode is called Bible Brothers. And thank you to all of you for watching this episode is called bible brothers and thank you for supporting us and for continuing to support us because this is now the launching pad today is the launching pad and we're being launched off of the game grumps uh building god's just like okay well you guys just made fun of me so uh how about no yeah but we didn't make fun of Islamic God or Judeo God. So they could all be blessing us right now. Yeah.

Because they're like, ha ha, you made fun of Jesus. We don't like that guy. Ha ha, dummy. Stop it. I imagine that was Jesus saying that. Stop it. Stop. Cut it out.

He's very frail wrist, that Jesus. Very limp wrist. Very limp wristed Jesus with a soft-spoken voice. Some would say if you were to go to the ocean, there's a gust of wind. Oh, oops. Sorry. Oh, heavens, how embarrassing. They're just flapping to the wind.

I can't control these things. Oh, it's hot as the dickens today. Bye.