supermegashow - EP 141 - Meat Mountain

Episode Date: June 1, 2019

We talk the best way to eat Arby’s, Jackson wants a Prowler, and we can’t hold a steady conversation. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Welcome one and all. It's that time of the week again. That's right. Our first podcast where we're on our own. And as you can tell, the channel has not changed a bit. Not one single bit. So, yep. Keep in mind, we're still searching for a super megaplex. The hunt is on. The hunt is on. We've been touring places.

We're like, hmm, this one, this room's a little too small. This one is just all right. I know when we probably exited Grumps, y'all expected a fast turnaround of everything's changing right now. But as I said, keep in mind, we have a six-show tour coming up as well as trying to find an office, as well as trying to get equipment and everything. Don't worry. All that stuff will be done ASAP because we just need a place to work, need a place to record. But thankfully, Brent and Aaron, the two lovely, lovely boys that they are,

have offered this recording space to us until we find our own. How sweet. Free of charge. I'm just excited to have a fucking Super Megaplex, dude. Yeah. Just had to have that fucking office. Have some desks in there with our computers, have some room a big big set room it's gonna be so sweet man and y'all will see it we'll do a we'll do a not a tour of some we'll do an office door we'll

probably film ourselves setting it up to do a do a vlog about setting it up so y'all can experience this journey with us it's almost like we're starting the channel again i know it actually does feel like that it feels almost like we're starting the channel again. I know. It actually does feel like that. It feels almost like we're like starting a new channel because we got to really like work things from the ground up. But I like that. I think that process is very fun, very fulfilling. What isn't fun is we were going to record some funny, funny games today.

But for some reason, the recording computer is just not working. Just no signals coming through. So that's why they let us use this because it's's breaking down you know because like well but before we came to record today like yeah we'll let them record for free but we'll fuck up all the equipment right in software so then then they just won't do it anymore and then we don't have to tell them they can't do it here and have it be awkward but you know um thank you guys for the for the positive kind words of encouragement uh since we left game grumps um you guys were all so sweet and supportive got many nice emails many nice messages

on instagram and and dms or uh direct or tweets at me on twitter not dms a lot of uh very nice messages and posts from people just saying uh that they're they support us and they're excited for what's next and we're very excited for what's next, too. So let's all buckle up and go on this journey together, huh? It's us. We're all going to. We all benefit from this. It's a journey we're all going to take with Matt and I at the front seat of this rocket ship and you guys in the exhaust port.

Actually. Providing the fuel for the rocket ship. Well, burning yourselves alive. That's whatiding the fuel for the rocket ship. Well, burning yourselves alive. That's what you guys are for. So thank you. You guys are like human coal. There actually is a way they can benefit monetarily.

Ryan and I sell tickets to the live shows that they had. For more than they originally were. Well, they could, but they also,

there's this brand new supplement program that ryan and i got in on the ground floor where basically it's so easy guys we sell you boxes of supplements that then you get your friends in on and they sell them too and basically everyone makes money because like if you get a lot of people selling under you and they have people selling under them that's a lot of money funneling to you. It's like think of like a pyramid where you're at the top. You know, all the money is just flowing to you.

We'll be at the top. Let's not. Yeah, but all you guys can be underneath us like two, one to two to three levels down. Family tree. Y'all are right there. Matt and I are the patriarch and matriarch of this tree. We have... Pyramid.

We have 125,000 boxes of these supplements. Went a little overboard. But we need you guys to help sell them. And you guys can make hella cash. You guys can make so much money if you can help us out with this. I got a bone to pick with the fans. No. What, you have a bone to pick with the fans i know well you have a bone to pick with the fans why it's about megalodons well what's what about the megalodons people are saying

sharks shed their teeth and they have thousands of teeth it's it's not it's not rare to find a megalodon tooth i can't name a single person that i've met that have that has found a megalodon tooth on a beach. And then there was someone that came back and said, you know, because I said there's a finite amount of it. And people are like, there's a finite amount of human teeth in the world. What about that? I'm like, yeah, megalodons are fucking extinct. There are 7.5 billion plus humans on this goddamn planet,

and we continue to reproduce. How is that an equal way to justify your argument? Biatch? Anyways, I still think Megalodon teeth should be 5 million dollars. Each. I find that you've been hoarding them. And you're like, come on!

Like I've just been going to the beach. It's as easy to find them as your everyday sand dollar. It's super easy. Like, Ryan, you have like 50,000 of them. Just in my closet. You're trying to convince, like, you bought, you bankrupted yourself buying them because you thought they were like, you could sell them for so much more and you find out they're worth nothing. Come on! These should be worth, think about it!

It belonged to a prehistoric beast millions of years ago it did actually you know what speaking of teeth i got my wisdom teeth yanked out of my head this week it was fantastic yeah all four of them they they reached in my mouth with little pliers and went i bet you had a better post experience than i did i did actually it was crazy because like later that day i was I was going around LA getting coffee and just like, I was fine. It didn't, I had some pain the first day. I was a little loopy, but then they gave me that Tylenol 3 with the codeine in it.

And I took it and I fell asleep. And then when I woke up, I felt fine. And that was two days ago. And now my teeth don't, like my mouth is fine. It doesn't hurt. I'm surprised. I thought it was going to be much worse healing process where everything was in pain and it's totally fine i'd do it again if i could if i could get all my other teeth taken out totally would do it what are you saying about your wisdom

tooth experience i just said yours is better than mine what was yours uh i went to go because you know how they put gauze where yeah that shit that shit kind of hurts to bite down on. To soak up the blood and stuff. Blood for a long, blood for like a day and a half. Yeah. Well, I went to go take a nap and I leaned my head back. Oh, no. Then the bloody gauze went to the back of my foot. As well as my, because this is like not that long after it happened.

As well as blood starting to pull out from the wounds. So, I just started choking. And this was on one of my ex's couches. So I started like spitting up blood. And she's like looking at me like. Like it looks like I'm dying. I'm just spitting up a lot of blood. You wake up like.

She's like blood and spit coming out of your mouth. I go to the. And I run to her toilet. And I just like. And there's a shit ton of blood just spills out into the toilet and she's like freaking out. And so she calls my mom and then my mom picks me up and goes, he does this all the time. He goes, tsk, tsk, tsk. Again with this, just, just call me to come pick you up.

You don't have to make a scene every time you don't like a girl. Like that one that was really fucking funny man i just like you're dating a girl and you don't want to date her so instead of like i don't like you you're just like you have to bite the inside of your cheek so hard that you just fill your mouth with blood just so you can spit it up all over her couch and ruin her parents couch I have to bite the inside of my cheek so hard that I can stick my tongue through it UGH Sorry, I just can't date you after that. Yeah, it was too traumatic Anyways, I hope you have a good life. Ryan we live five minutes apart from each other Mm

You know Distance isn't everything What the fuck are you talking about? We're done. We're done, baby. Puts on sunglasses. I get in my PT Cruiser convertible. Yep.

With the big muffler in the back. Yep. The muffler that's the same shape as the Eiffel Tower. Because I love the Eiffel Tower. Okay. I had to have been really expensive. And then I go, well, I'm rich. Yeah. Because I'm a YouTuber.

Right. It makes that sound. And I fucking go off into the sunset. I literally go to the sun and live there because I'm so rich I can afford the suit that allows me to survive on the sun. Ryan gets some prime real estate on the surface of the fucking sun.

And it's like a beach house. It's always sunny. It's sunny every day there. Shut up. We went to a nice restaurant. It was some delicious food. It was super good. It's because it was Harrison's birthday.

Hold on. Let me try to get the name. Don't tell me. I don't think I remember either. Yeah, I remember it. Bavel. Yes. Was that what it was?

It was Bavel. Was it Bavelll b-a-v-e-l i saw that dude oh what's his name jay mum he was in like brooklyn 99 as the crazy dude his curly hair and then a big beard with some gray some gray i thought i recognized him just from the back of his head and i went to yeah you Yeah, you were like, that's that guy. And I'm like, that's got to be him, right? And I was like, Matt's a good friend. So Matt's like, I'm going to go use the restroom. And so he walks all the way out of his way to check to see if it was him. I did the thing where I was like looking for the bathroom.

I'm like, is it over this way maybe? Walked past his table. It was him. It was the guy. He gave me the nod. I looked at you and I was like yep yep and uh that restaurant was good it was like an egyptian restaurant food was incredible you can just say middle eastern i think it's egyptian like specifically isn't it specifically yeah well

i looked it up but just the middle eastern okay ryan well jackson picked it out and told me it was an egyptian restaurant and the napkins had a pyramid on it. No, I'm saying I didn't know and so now I know because you wouldn't go to just a Chinese restaurant and call it Asian, would you? No, I'm talking specifics here. Yeah. You'd go to a Chinese restaurant and call it Chinese. I just got

some Asian food. Got some Asian takeout. I just say Chinese. Why? I got some Chinese. Why? To make yourself feel better? No, it's Chinese food why would i call it asian food matt knows the difference between chinese food and japanese food look at this guy chinese food is chinese food it's one of the most popular genres of food what's taiwanese food then taiwanese food i imagine are dishes similar to chinese food but maybe with their own why similar what do you mean? Because Taiwan is part of China, dumbass.

It's owned by China. Excuse me. And they will never be independent, no matter how hard they try. Not in our eyes. Not in the government's eyes. That is China. Surely not China's eyes. Taiwan is not Taiwan.

You know? You know what, Brian? I'm living in California. I want this to be Matland now. It's Matland. It's not California. It's Matland. Nope, I live in Matland, and me and my group of friends say so.

You live in Matland, Ryan. Yeah, I do, every day. Yeah, you do, baby. That's a joke, guys, the Taiwan stuff. That's a very, that'll strike a nerve with some people so uh taiwan is is it too bold to say that i think taiwan is its own country is that too much of like a political standpoint no it's a fact yeah i just think there's gonna be some dude taiwan is its own country what are you fucking stupid?

It's like the people who get upset when we say the Tiananmen Square Massacre was a thing. I know. Oh, you live in your own little American bubble. Wait, it was a thing? No, it's when we say it wasn't a thing because it wasn't. What? It didn't happen. What?

The Tiananmen Square Massacre. It's propaganda. No, it didn't. It definitely happened. It did not happen. It did. Were you there, Ryan?. It's propaganda. No, it didn't. Definitely happened. It did not happen. It did. Were you there, Ryan? With your own two eyes?

Did you see it happen? No. Then it didn't see. Did Vietnam happen? Yes. Were you there? My father and my grandpa were. Did you see it with your own eyes?

Well, Ryan, my dad saw it with his eyes and I came from his semen. So yes, technically I did. Did your dad come inside of your mom? Did you see it with your own eyes, Matt? I inside of your mom? Did you see it with your own eyes Matt? I was in the cum. So. Did you see it with your eyes? I literally was the cum. So my eyes.

Your eyes weren't developed then yet. But they were contained within the DNA of the cum. Eyes don't develop until months and months later. But it was contained within the DNA. Like what would make my eyes was inside that DNA that was in my dad's cum. So technically yeah. I was there. You didn't see it, though, with your own two eyes.

That's what I'm getting at. What are you getting at? That you didn't see it with your own two eyes. Well, I did, because I was there. No. I was there. Even when you're first born, you don't really see too much. I'm not talking about seeing it with my eyes.

I just said I was there. You technically were not there. Yes, I was. That was my genetic matter. The egg in my mother's vagina and the semen which was my genetic information they were both there my dad was so what's your stance on abortion then my stance on abortion yeah it's a lot like my view on taiwan it's not a country okay abortion isn't a country yeah was that your argument? Yes. You know who supports abortions?

Me undies. I'm kidding. God, can you imagine? You know who's absolutely all for abortion? This week's sponsor. Their product has nothing to do with abortion, but they did send us an email asking if we could throw that in. So how quickly could we lose every single sponsor? If they said they supported abortion?

No, I mean, like, if we had a contest with other YouTube channels, lose our sponsors faster. Oh, dude. We could lose them in a heartbeat. It's very easy to lose all of them in a heartbeat. Just mention another one during the ad read of another one. It's like, why wouldn't you use, like... I mean, others are good,, but I mean, like,

Hanes is like five bucks at Walmart, you know? You know, ten a pack, and for what, like, ten bucks? I do like Squarespace, but I mean, there's like, there's other services for websites. Can't keep any of this in. Well, we're not actually, we're joking as if we said that. Yeah. You can actually, like,

the sponsor's the best. Never pay to the mind that we're spitting true facts here. All right, they're done. They're done. No more ads. They think it's funny to joke about. They can talk about literally anything when they choose to talk about that. But I love MeUndies.

They're comfortable. And Squarespace, who's not even sponsoring this podcast. Fuck you, Squarespace. Fuck you. You're not sponsoring this podcast. Yeah, so I can say whatever I want about you because you're not giving us money for this episode. Oh, I'm totally kidding

Squarespace. You're gonna drop us quick. Squarespace, you guys. We'll update our fans if Squarespace drops us. If they don't drop us, they're a cool company. We haven't done an ad read for them in a while. If they do drop us. They might have already dropped us. That is true. When's the last time we did Squarespace?

I don't know. Hell of all our sponsors, dude. My house is only filled with our sponsors' items. Yeah, your car has a lot of their decals on them. Yep. They cut a little, uh... You find out that, like, they just cut an extra deal with me

to give me, like, double the amount you get. Matt, I wish you drove a car that had, like, a mold of your face on the hood. You mean, like, the metal of the hood is molded into my face? Yeah. If someone out there can do that, like send me an email. Because if you can do that for me. Where all you would have to do is attach it and it would look like it's your head on the hood.

That's incredible. Yeah. I definitely have that on my car if that was the thing. Odds are you have to put a decal on your car of my choosing. For a week. Ten. One, two, three, four. Yes.

Man, I fucking swear. You lost a four the other day too. I always lose what are the odds now. What did you lose i gotta i gotta take us to go see carrot top in las vegas yep with my own fucking money i have to go pay for on your twitter right now my header is a picture of exactly alexandria casio court a painting of her from the american flag it just says the words impeach so thank you ryan because i lost that one uh i lost a lot dude

I got something coming up I gotta look up a fun decal for your car cause you gotta wear I always have to have the Tucker brothers in on this cause they always think of some really good ideas I wish you wouldn't because every time they come up with the perfect thing Jackson's good at it

I wanna tell Jackson right now hold on I'm gonna call him yeah I want to tell Jackson right now. Hold on. I'm going to call him. I'm going to give him a call. Yeah. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because, you know, if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's in everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now, all you need

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you can do this when you Angie that download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's a N G I.com. That's A-N-G-I dot com. What do you want? I got some good news, buddy. Yeah? Matt just lost in What Are The Odds?

And he has to put a decal of my choosing on his car for a week. Okay. So I just want you to – I'm just putting that in your head so maybe you can help me out a little bit. Well, thank you, Jackson. I just, as I said, even if you want to tell Harrison to get him involved, because it's a whole week and he has to have this on his car, so. And I'm still saving up for the fucking tickets to go see Carrot Top in Las Vegas and wherever we stay for the weekend because that's not cheap.

No, you don't have to pay for where we stay. You just have to pay for the show. Really? Yeah. Oh, okay. Nowhere in that did I say that you had to pay for where we stay. Thank you. Well, that's very, that's like, you could have easily just been like, oh yeah, you have to pay for everything. But that was very nice. They just have to pay for the tickets. Carrot Top's tickets. I'm an asshole. I'm not a villain.

Thank you. Thank you. So, uh, I love you Tucker Jackson Tucker I saw his last name Shut up Matt I saw your last name as Jackson Tucker And so I just read what it said I'm sorry Jackson

Yeah you better Okay Yeah recording right now in fact I know Nothing because their Equipment doesn't work here He thinks a lot of Aaron Hansen Yeah

More like Aaron and Parson Cause he's so fucking poor Yeah cause season 9's coming Did you kick him off? Yeah Yeah, because season 9 is coming. I know Harrison is busy playing Sekiro. So I, you know. Did you kick him off? I could be productive or play Fortnite. Yeah. I would rather be productive. Okay.

Well. Well. Enjoy Fortnite. I mean. Oh. I have some good decal ideas. Well, Jackson. I'll buy you later.

Already. Jackson, it's Wednesday, which is a work day. And it's 421 as we speak. So I don't think you should be playing any Fortnite right now because technically I sent you a text asking what I should do for something and you haven't responded so is that true Matt I don't have any

text messages let me go is it something you looked at and didn't respond to I have one message from Jackson Tucker unread what can I do for Patreon right now that was actually sent exactly one hour ago Jackson Tucker on red. What can I do for Patreon right now? That was actually sent exactly one hour ago, Jackson.

Ah, okay. So, yeah. What a business we're running, buddy. Sorry, I guess I'll text you some shit to do. I'm just kidding, dude. It's 4.22, so I have about 41 minutes left in the office. In the office? Matt's apartment?

Yeah. But yeah, just let me know. You boys have a good time. You know what, Jackson? Take the rest of the day off. Go play Fortnite. No, jokes aside though, I mean, all I can do, because I'm... You're bored playing Fortnite, I know. I'm very bored. Okay. You're bored playing Fortnite, I know I'm very bored Okay

I mean, if you actually do want something to do I can easily give you something Just send it to me and I'll start working on it Yeah, it's called Ryan's Mom Um Okay It's called your mom's fat pussy, Jackson Now go get to work

And bring me a coffee while you're at it Drive to the Game Grumps office with a coffee while you're at it. Drive to the Game Grumps office with a coffee for me, please. Chop chop. You got 40 minutes. Is your company car yet? Your company car is a Prowler, right? That's what I've been asking for.

I want the yellow Prowler with purple flames. Purple flames? I thought it was blue flames, buddy. No, purple. Is it okay if it has blue flames? I don't was blue flames, buddy. No, purple. Shit. Yellow, probably with purple. Is it okay if it has blue flames? I don't want to send it back. You know what? For you, yeah. Okay.

I just feel bad now. We'll get the purple later. We'll get the purple later. I promise. I feel bad. We're just letting him down now. My Christmas bonus. Yeah, yeah. We'll give you purple flames for your Christmas bonus. Cool. Oof. Do you want... Wait, hold on one second. Sorry, they just texted me. Do you want nitrous at all

um I mean yeah see the interesting thing about prowlers is they're actually incredibly slow vehicles despite how they look so I'm curious to see what the nitrous does prowlers might be like one of the ugliest cars I've ever seen in my life

we saw one recently with like tribal fucking that's a little rude. I mean, I wouldn't say that about his car. Despite, uh, you know, despite how I may feel, but he's their own, I guess.

Well, I think objectively the 2015 Honda Civic is a lot prettier than a Prowler. Well, that's your opinion. Well, I think it's almost unanimous if you asked. If you did a survey, Jackson,

if you did a survey of 100 people and said, which car is more attractive? I'm not going to speak for Ryan, but I'm pretty sure two out of three are. Who's calling me? Sorry, I'm getting a phone call now. I need to answer this phone call. Hello? Yes, this is. I'm getting a phone call now. What the fuck is going on? I need to answer this phone call. Oh, what's happening? Are you guys actually recording? Hello?

Is this your podcast right now? Yeah, we're recording a podcast right now. Yes, this is. No one listens to that shit anyway. I know. So, like, who cares if all of this is just a big jumble? Yes, yes, yes. I don't know if... I think Matt's on a phone call.

I could easily embarrass him. No, I'm off the phone call. That was the person we're meeting with tonight for the office. Okay. They were just confirming. Are they a man or a woman? A woman. I know.

No, that's actually good. We can get a better deal from them. They don't know business as well. Yeah, that's the thing. We got smart man business brains, so we can easily negotiate a much better deal. See, if another man's there, he knows how to do it. He knows the business, the tactics. But women have small brain, Ryan.

Women do have small brain. Men have big brain. Men have big brain, women have small brain. We can easily get a better deal. Bye, Jackson. Bye. That was nice. Yeah.

That was very nice. Well, yeah, I got to put that fucking decal on my car, don't I? Eventually. Do you have any ideas? I have a few. Do you remember on your- I just want people in California to hate you. Oh, no, Ryan.

Go make it political. Of course I'm going to make it political, buddy. Dude. Buddy. Oh, my God, Ryan. Can we set some ground rules? No, we didn't set any ground rules beforehand. Okay, one rule.

It cannot be the N-word. There. That's your one rule. Oh, thank heaven dude i was really scared you were gonna put a giant decal of the n-word on the side of my car can we set some real ground rules okay nothing nothing racial of course nothing nothing hateful no it can be opinionated but it can't be hateful you can't then say just because it's political it isn't the political mindset that you're in

that it's hateful it will not be hate speech but from a perspective from from someone in california's perspective it it might it may be hateful i well what i'm saying what i mean by like is i don't want to be driving around Los Angeles with a thing that's saying like, gays burn in hell on my car. No, no, no, no. Like you're going to give me like a rainbow pride flag on fire. It's not just hateful.

It's a fact. I, of course, don't believe that all gays are burning in hell. Statistically, though, but it's not because they're gay. Some gays are burning in hell just because they're sinners. Not because of the gay thing. No. Like, there's lots of straights in hell. There's some gays in heaven.

And there's some straights in heaven. You know? Some. A couple. Well, he found out, like, actually, like, someone just fucked with it along the way in the bible but like actually straights just go to hell and like gays are the only ones accepted into heaven dude heaven would be the best party you know get in there be a bunch of like dudes and leather and speedos and shit the best thing would just be the biggest fucking decal just all

on the side and all it is is trump 2020 i think that would be enough to get people to just really my car we get it's los angeles my car would probably get keyed oh yeah you know dude on the on the way it's not hateful on the way here on the way here i was at a red light and this car pulls up next to me it's like i look and it's like it's like a old ass sedan that has been wrapped fully in a camo wrap and it's covered in different fonts just says usa marines and it has a cartoon character on the back like is it taz yes did you see it have you seen that no no i just know that for some reason i don't know how i know this or why I know this. It was Taz, yeah. When it's something with the military, they usually put Taz on there for some reason.

It was wild. It had like text all over it and it was like, USA Marines! Go Marines! Go America! Like all over it. But it was Taz. And it had Taz on the very back windshield. Yeah.

That's wild. I looked at it and I was like, whoa, dude. Do you think like, that person is just that dedicated. They like the Marines that much. They're like, I'm going to do my whole fucking car like this. I drive around. Like, I couldn't even be bothered to do that for something that I really cared about. Well, now I will, like, soon with the decal you got maybe put on.

But it's like. See, if it was a naked man, you'd think it was funny. And you'd be like, yeah, this is just everyone else. Look at their reaction. I want you to feel embarrassed. Why, Ryan? Why? Because I don't. Because. what did i do you lost you lost the game and you have to buy his carrot top tickets which

i'm excited for buddy and i have to fucking do the other thing that have we even talked about that yet are we saving that is that a secret that's a secret okay well you guys will you guys will find out eventually that's that's gonna be a good one yeah i guess it is it's gonna be horrible for me it's the biggest what are the odds that we have ever fucking done and i lost out of what a hundred was it a hundred it was something i thought it was just 20 i well whatever it was i lost did you lose did we say four with that one as well i don't know i'm not'm not ever going to say four again. Didn't you say out of five? Because you were like, out of five. And I was like, okay.

And then we just did four. We have the footage of what happened directly after where we talked about it. Because we didn't capture the first thing on film, but then we started filming right after. So we'll see when we watch that footage. No lie, it is something I'm hyped for. And something you should be very hyped for, Matt. I'm very hyped for it, buddy. You should be super excited.

I'm very excited, Ryan. It's going to be the best time of your life. It's going to be a time to remember. The greatest weekend of your life. Yeah, the greatest weekend of Matt Watson's life. Has not happened yet. That's actually a pretty good video. It's going to be a great video.

Like a good title. I think it's going to be a good video. I think it's going to be a fantastic video. I'm very excited. It's going to suck. It's going to be a great video. Like a good title. I think it's going to be a good video. I think it's going to be a fantastic video. I'm very excited. It's going to suck. It's going to really suck for me. I just got to stop playing What Are The Odds. You lose a lot.

I lose a lot. I don't know how. It's like karma or some shit. It's like the universe is like, ha ha. You lost a pretty good one with Justin that we don't have to talk about. No, we'll talk about it because I'm probably just not going to do it. Yeah. Ryan,

that was out of what? That was out of 100. That was out of 100. Yeah. First time Justin ever played What Are The Odds. That is true. Him and Ryan said the same number

and it was Ryan had to get a tattoo of the sound wave. Of my name Jeff. My name Jeff. And you're backing out of that? I think I am. Here's the thing, unfortunately, with What Are The Odds? Whenever it's like 100, Matt and I and Jackson and Harrison and everyone I've ever played with have always backed out of something.

I'm going to use my backing out of something for this one, probably. Because sometimes it's fun just to see. And Justin doesn't even listen to the podcast, so he's just be like some fan you are justin some fucking fan man all i know is justin was really harping on me early for not wanting to do it he's like come on it was out of a hundred you gotta respect it like i was too but it's just because i really wanted that of course you know you want to see it but i don't want to have that on my body forever not even as a joke I don't like memes affecting my everyday life. It's not affecting everyday life affect my how's that? How's anybody gonna know it's the waveform for my name Jeff it affects my personal life because I have to look at that and be

Like you what is that gonna bring your quality of life down? Yeah, you're gonna be more unhappy I'm gonna be cursed the moment that ink touches my skin You know how easy it is like you're gonna be like oh You're going to be more unhappy in life? I'm going to be cursed the moment that ink touches my skin. You know how easy it is? You're going to be like, oh, this is the heartbeat of my child when it was in the womb. Here's the thing. When you back out of an odds are, the thing that me and my friends used to do was the other person got to slap the other as hard as they wanted to. We need to start coming up with some form of punishment.

There has to be some form of punishment. So, Justin, there will be some form of punishment for me. You can make me whatever food you want. You have to go eat a whole meal at Arby's. Oh, no. You got to eat a whole fucking... No, you have to go get the meat mountain at Arby's and eat the whole thing by yourself if you back out of something. Matt. What?

Odds are... Oh, no. You gave me a little giggle before you said that one. Odds are you have... I'll pay for it, but... Great. You're going to get the meat mountain at Arby's. And you have to go sit in a parking lot on a hot day with your air conditioning off.

And you can't turn on your car air conditioning on until you finish it. Can I at least do like a food review while I do it? Yes. Or I'll go review the Meat Mountain in a burning hot. How about I drive to an Arby's in like Arizona in July. Okay. Okay. But it just has to be hot as fuck.

Yeah, Arizona. What if you have a fucking heat stroke in your car and die? And die with a big meat mountain spilling on me? Imagine being a cop. Being called to that. Being called to that call. It's just some dead dude in a car with an Arby's meat mountain. He's like all over his lap.

The camera's still recording him. Sir! Sir! What the fuck? He just opens up the he's got a camera and he's like what the hell happened? It would just look like it's wild man. Do you know what a meat mountain is? It's a mountain of meat. It's literally a mountain of meat they just

give you at Arby's. Look it up. It's fucking like Arby's is like why do people think we're so gross? It's like look at it's called a it up. It's fucking, like, Arby's is like, why do people think we're so gross? It's like, look at it's called a meat mountain. Yeah, that's our You don't have to do the Arizona in July shit. But it's gonna be a hot day. Hot days are coming soon. Ten, yeah.

One, two, three, seven. Four. I said four. I said four. I don't have to do it. Matt, if I had said four, people would have been like, why, Matt? Why do you go for four? When we were counting down, I was frantically trying to think of a number. What I thought was, you know what? I don't think he's going to choose four because he knows I'm not going to.

So I did it because we just talked about it. So I'm like, I'm going to do four. Yeah. But it's one of those things where it's like, or maybe he's thinking that I'm thinking that. But you do have to buy us carrot top tickets you do have to do something we can't say yet and what's the third one that had the decal on my car for a week week that means from 2 p.m one week or 5 p.m whenever you start exactly a week why do the why does jackson and like why are the t Tucker brothers have such good luck with this stuff?

Like, they got, they lost to What Are The Odds and they ended up seeing Dennis Hoffman. I know. Because of it. They just got to go on a Hollywood TMZ tour. Because of that What Are The Odds, their path and Dennis Hoffman's path crossed. Isn't that amazing? Is his name Dennis Hoffman? It's Dustin Hoffman.

Did I say, wait, did I say Dennis? You said Dennis Hoffman. I was like, what? Dustin Hoffman, sorry. Not Dennis Hoffman. Did I say... Wait, did I say Dennis? You said Dennis Hoffman. I was like, what? Dustin Hoffman, sorry. Not Dennis Hoffman. Whoops. Did you know there's a park in LA called Dennis the Menace Park? Really?

I just saw that on a map the other day. Is it well kept? I don't know. I haven't been. But it sounds like some shit goes down there. But that's a great place to murder somebody. Because then it's like... Well, Ryan doesn. That's a great place to murder somebody, because then it's like, well, Ryan doesn't want me to talk about this anymore

because he's flashing me his MeUndies. I am. You just gave me a look, and you're flashing me those MeUndies. Well, give me the damn at- No, put it away. Put it away. Don't need to say anything more about that.

It wasn't even out. My underwear was out. My underwear was covered. Your MeUndies were showing, but through the MeUndies, there was something else bobbing there. It was like a plate of Jell-O, and when you shake the plate of Jell-O,

it goes like that within your MeUndies. The bass that you gave it really makes me feel good about my dick right now. What? It produces large sound waves. Very deep, resounding sound waves. So do MeUndies, which now produce large sound waves. Very deep, resounding sound waves. So do MeUndies, which now produce large sound waves.

No, they don't! You probably spend about 90% of your life in underwear. So don't you think you owe it to yourself to make sure you're wearing the softest undies, not just in town, but in the whole fucking universe? Yes. Fuck! That's why Ryan and I only wear MeUndies. Which is true.

Look. Wearing MeUndies right now. We're both wearing them. You got those water? Is that a water bottle? No, it's like tropical plants and there's parrots. Okay. There are several different colors of parrots. Well, I mean, the fact is these undies are so soft,

they make Bob Ross's voice sound like Gilbert Gottfried. MeUndies uses the coveted micromodal fabric, which is a full three times softer than cotton. That's honestly, Ryan, So insane that they're that soft The first time I felt MeUndies No shit I literally was like whoa What is that material like that does not Feel like any underwear I've ever felt

Feels like nice silk Yeah it honestly feels like silk It's like a weird material It's soft though and they're like stretchy too Very stretchy so You guys which I know it's very few of you Cause you like stretchy too very stretchy so if you guys which i know it's very few of you because you like you like let's plays if a couple of you might have a big package though me undies will adequately uh because ryan and i have huge penises and we have

to no underwear would fit them but me undies does that's right you know i've had the same uh size penis since middle school and so that's always impressed people. Yeah. They always look at it and they look, they're like, oh, they start laughing. I'm like, yeah, it makes you nervous, doesn't it? Yeah. Yeah. Yep. People point at it when they see it.

I know. Because they're so marveled at the size of our penis. And you can just see the shock on their face because they just have that reaction where they just smirk and like laugh because they're in shock. Not only will you feel like your loins are being hugged by joy itself, but MeUndies gives you multiple style options for men, women, and everyone else. Men can now try

the new boxer brief with fly. Sorry ladies, can't try this one. Which is the same great cut as boxer brief, but now with an added option for guys who prefer to go through the gate versus over the fence. Yep. Richard Nixon.

MeUndies is also the go-to for the softest loungewear on this planet. Hang out in the super comfy lounge plants and onesies. Yes, MeUndies makes onesies. And they're incredible. MeUndies has a great offer for our listeners. Okay, when you order any MeUndies, you get 15% off and free shipping. Get 50% off a pair of the most comfortable undies you will ever put on. Sounded like you said 50. Just want to clarify 15. Yeah. Not 50.

Get your 15% off your first pair. Free shipping and 100% satisfaction guarantee. Go to MeUndies.com slash SuperMega. That's MeUndies.com slash SuperMega. I'm wearing them right now. Touching my balls. Alright. Cool. Wait balls. All right.

Cool. Wait a second, Ryan. What? You know what would make you look really good while you wear me undies? Some sort of fitness routine? If you could get a hot body using OpenFit. Whoa. OpenFit is bringing you something new that makes it even easier to never miss a sweet session.

Sweat session. Sweat session. It will be a sweet session, though, because you'll be, it will be a sweet session though. Cause you'll be looking so sweet afterwards session, lose the commute to the gym and let the workouts come to you. Come what is open fit, open fit takes all the complexity out of losing weight and getting fit. It's a brand new, super simple streaming service that allows you to work out from the comfort of

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with Hunter McIntyre, named by Sports Illustrated as one of the top 50 fittest athletes. They know how to give results quick. It's also super simple. Forget all the complexity and stress around getting fit and just press play and work out on your schedule.

600 seconds with celebrity trainer Devin Wiggins packs the fat-burning, muscle-building, and body-sculpting benefits of much longer sessions into a fraction of the time. That's crazy, Ryan. You can access it anywhere and anytime, either computer, web-enabled TV, tablet, smartphone, and Roku. These are results you can see, Matthew.

Lose up to 15 pounds in just the first 30 days. I need to do that. Flatten your abs, shape your body, and look and feel great. I didn't use it because I don't need to lose weight. Matt, I command you to speak. uh i saw tommy wiseau the other day i was walking a hummer he was he was driving a fucking hummer that so i'm walking didn't even take a picture for your for your friend ron well it's because he was so he was just stopped at a red light and i walked up to his car he was stopped so you had enough time but i didn't notice it was him until he just started he right when it turned green i see a hummer and on the back it says and big a big

decal it says uh the room the movie.com was it a military style hummer too yeah dude it was heavy duty whenever someone says the word hummer all i can think of are the yellow hummers same same that's like the best hummer out there uh do you remember those ones that came out for like they were kind of like the newish sleek looking hummer but they a lot of people got it in like light blue and then white at the top yes yes yeah yeah I remember that

like I just look and I'm like wow that car is advertising the movie The Room and I look when I walk by and I'm like holy shit guys that's Tommy Wiseau and they're like no it's not and I'm and I'm like, holy shit, guys, that's Tommy Wiseau. And they're like, no, it's not. And I'm like, look. They look and they're like, oh, yep, that's Tommy Wiseau. He's sitting there.

He looked very contemplative and then he drove off. He's thinking. He is. What goes through that mind, we'll never know. I know somebody, Harrison's friend met Tommy Wiseau once and said that he smelled like, he just smelled so strong of just leather. He just smelled like aged leather. And they said it was like incredible and they don't know why. They said he just smelled

like good aged leather. Is there a way you can donate your body so they can use your skin to make leather boots or like leather jackets and stuff? We gotta stop using animals. Seriously, and also like when you die, that skin's just gonna

go to waste you know it's like you know okay listen up vegans you want you want you're so into recycling and shit why don't you want to really recycle everything when you die your bones could be used for some like cool tools toys kids toys for like uh drumsticks yeah exactly you can play sick drums with that you dude i mean you know those bones that they have in uh pet stores that you can just give to your dog because they have some of the some shit still on them and they're seasoned a little bit make that out of human bones a pooch would love that dude and who cares if it's human bones like the person's dead it doesn't really matter what like what does it matter what kind of bone it is if you die before uh but before lego i'm gonna give him your femur he's gonna

chew on it that pooch is gonna love that shit. That's too big of a bone. You know that. Yeah. Sorry. Uh, forearm. The, uh, tibia. Yeah, the forearm. The tibula and the fibula. The tibia?

You want the tibia? Okay. I want the clitoris. It's not a bone. Uh. Gives me a bone, though. Yeah, dude. But pound it, man.

God, straight sex is great. God. Uh, ever since we've been away from gangbangers, we've been having so much sex. Straight sex. Not with each other. So much. Sex with women. God. Ever since we've been away from gangbangers, we've been having so much sex. Straight sex. Not with each other. So much. Sex with women. Straight sex.

I have had sex with girls. All week. Women. Every time I call Ryan, he's like, sorry, I'm having sex with a woman right now. A grown human woman. And I'm like, all right, man. This one time we just animojied each other while we were having sex. Yeah, it was awesome because Ryan jailbroke his iPhone.

And he has an animoji where he customized his penis too. So I can see it flopping and doing all the crazy shit it does when Ryan has sex with a woman straightly. For some reason, you just downloaded the Will.i.am animoji pack of all his different styles. And that's all you use. Well, I like to represent what I am one of the greatest musicians of our generation

black eyed peas is a great what nothing it is it is it's fantastic I love the black eyed penises yeah right right right, right? That's the content you guys fucking come for, alright?

I cut this clip out. It is exactly what people should hear to have themselves turned away from this podcast. Like, I've never listened to that super mega cast. Let me listen to a random clip and see if I like it. And it's just that clip right there. That's not the one. Does my voice hit the same waveforms as your voice when I talk? I think so.

Yeah, it does. Okay. Because I just, because I talk silently sometimes. And then I see like how, see how small that is. Yeah. Well, dynamics process, you know, make it show up. I just need to project more when I talk. You got to project.

See, here's me just talking regular. You know, this is how I talk sometimes in the podcast. But I need to project more and do this a lot more. Watch this. Pronunciation my words. Dude, it's really crazy talking and then looking at the waveforms being written with every word we say. Like, I'm looking at it right now. And if you guys download the waveform to this podcast, you can watch along and see the exact waveforms that are coming out of my mouth right now.

Hold on. I want to actually see what this waveform would look like what waveform hold on is it the oh you want to see what my name is jeff waveform looks like to see what your tattoo would be yes i want to see if maybe it's a cool wave guys download this shit put it into audacity everyone's saying all right let's see it yeah one more time one more time. I was talking. That's it. That doesn't look bad, dude. It's not a bad waveform.

You know? It looks like a plane about to fly into the sun. It does. You know? Yeah. Or like a plane about to crash into a big rock. So. Like a building.

Yeah. It did, though. It really did. It looked like a plane about to crash yeah it's interesting that one looks like a bird now and now we're just having fun with waveforms like oh do you see the shape of that watch this one whoa i got to dip down more than it dipped up. I just want like... This is what the podcast is about. We're watching the TV screen

and the waveforms. We were just... The stupid noise. Like people... People are like cluing in. They're like, what the fuck is going on?

What are they doing? Like, there's not even any conversation. They're going, woo, woo. Oh, that one looked like dog bone. Oh,

God. I mean, if you download this podcast or are listening to it on some program where you can see the waveform, you'll be entertained too because, because you'll be like, oh, look at that. It's the waveform. Well, they'll look a lot different than they are now because they'll be processed.

Whoa. Whoa, dude. This one, that one was cool. Watch. It's like very rapid. It's like Sponge're very rapid. It's like SpongeBob. Yep. Everyone's turning this off.

They're like, what the fuck is this, dude? I love how we called it out. And then we kept doing it. It's fun. And we got even dumber. Oh, my God. If the people complaining on Let's Plays about people making dumb noises is what makes them leave, then this is a clear indication of where our channel is headed.

This episode is just, like, mind-melting. I feel like just being a part of the creation of this, I've lost, like, 20 IQ points. I'm not going to lie, dude. This episode's felt a bit off in so many... Not negative ways. Maybe. It's felt... It's been a wild episode. Yeah. It's been a very... Very wacky, you know? Very unique.

We're out of practice. Yeah. You know, we got fired from Game Grumps, so now we're just trying to... I mean, we left Game Grumps, so... Did Matt just slip up? He did it, guys. See, it sounded like he was joking, but it also sounds like that he's trying to cover it up. Yeah, we got fired because we wouldn't

stop talking about Brent's smelly-ass dick. That's really what happened. So, you guys wanted the truth? I quit because of Brent's too sexual harassment, but... I just got fired for Brent's penis thing. You know, we still gotta prank Brent with the water cup prank.

Guys, here's a great prank to pull on someone. If you're so inclined to give me a laugh, do it to your friends. No, do it to your mom. Do it to your little old, poor old, feeble mother. And film it, because this is going to make me and Ryan laugh. You get a cup of water. Not a heavy cup, like

a solo cup, because you don't want to hurt them. Fill up a red solo cup with water. Red solo cup. I live you up. Fill you up. Let's have a party. Let's have a party. Red solo cup.

Anyway, I was. He goes, I lift you up. Proceed to party. It's a good song. I did a karaoke in Nashville while we were on tour. Proceed to party. It's a good song. I did a karaoke in Nashville while we were on tour.

Anyway, fill up a solo cup with some water and then say, mom, I want you to help me out. I'm going to do a cool magic trick. Then throw it in her face. Yep. That's all you got to do. Also, punch her in the tits when you do that. Yeah, dude. Yeah.

But what you really do is you get on a chair or a stool, and you put it up against the ceiling so the cup is up against the ceiling, and then you make your mom hold it up against the ceiling with a broom, okay? And then you just get down and walk off and start filming her. Because now she can't get the cup down, because if she moves the broom, the cup with water is going to fall on her. So go film your—do it to your grandma, guys. Make it a cup of tax make it a cup of hydrochloric acid and make your grandma hold it up she'll go what's what's this it spills down all over your grandma's face you can film it put on twitter that's funny stuff what are the what would the audio waves of that look like uh what what am i doing sweet yeah damn that was a crazy waveform

that's interesting why does it do that oh cause it is it because something's so loud that it has to go back to normal so the only way is like to quickly curve maybe I think it I don't know how waveforms work dude these are just vibrations man I'm picking up good vibrations not from this podcast

I'm picking up great vibrations from this podcast I have had a blast so far this episode's been fun man but it has been maybe it's just cause I'm maybe it's because now we're without Game Grumps and we're on our own and maybe I'm a bit self conscious

really? Ryan there's no need to be self conscious you were funny you were upstanding. You're beautiful. You underestimate how attractive you are as a man. No homo. I didn't even mention your looks. Well, I mentioned them. I was talking about, what?

I'm mentioning them. I think you look good. Thanks. Thank you. You look good too. I like the, you dress very nice. Thank you. I just bought this shirt.

Some would say I never reach my full potential because I always dress and eat like shit Is it mean to agree No, cuz it's true. I see it. I see that I see that see you see what would happen if I worked out and dress nice I was actually mean hair looks like an asshole. You wouldn't see that's that's where you're wrong I look like an asshole right now. I can't win. Ryan. The fat bearded man bun dude. Everyone knows he has problems.

No, Ryan. Listen. Harris and I were saying this the other day. That if you, if you like got super fucking ripped in dressing a certain way, you would just be a pure alpha. Like you were such a fucking, like you would walk into a room and dominate it. And I'm just going to be the skinny little beta that hangs out with you. Because I just wish I was an alpha.

You got the Adam's apple though. Adam's apple is a strong indicator of a massive cock. Is it? Yeah. Is it really? Yeah, it's big dick energy. Comes straight from the Adam's apple. That's big dick energy, dude.

I hate the Adam's apple. I hate looking at it. I hate thinking about it. Did I ever tell you the thought that makes me go, oh no. Oh no. You know, in movies, you're really good at giving me those like, oh, it's like whenever someone gets their throat slit, the reason like it makes me kind of like go in so much is because I picture what it would feel like for the knife to graze against the Adam's

apple. Why? Why? Why say that on the podcast? Because it makes me cover my neck like I'm doing now. I'm covering my neck too and so did a hundred thousand fucking people dude they're like oh i'm gonna relax and listen to a podcast it's just us going i mean like this one like imagine slicing your adam's apple oh i know

i've talked about it before it's nasty man it makes the same feeling when i watch that scene in jackass too oh but they're taking the paper and cutting the headings of their toes? That's not even a stunt. That's just like, come on Steve-O. That's the one thing that I'll watch and I won't crack a smile. I'll just be like, why? This is it's like the one time I feel like an old person watching Jackass. That and

then in Jackass 2 when they go fishing with Steve-O. Oh, and he puts the hook through his cheek? He's on major drugs during that scene. Oh yeah, that's the only way he's able to do that like you'd have to really be on some shit into where a bunch of sharks are yeah what does he think it's like it's not just falling out of a golf cart if a shark takes a chunk out of you he's taking an artery with him yeah uh shark saying it like that's not gonna speak i don't want you it's gonna fucking those sharp ass megalodon teeth you

know what how about those of you who actually have a megalodon tooth why don't you fucking film a video of yourself and at super mega be like hello I am a fan of super mega and this is my megalodon tooth so I can see just how unrare they are. Yeah. Yeah guys prove to Ryan how unrare they really are. Or just go film a video and go just find one on a beach. Or mail them all to us. Please.

So then we can just get a massive collection of Megalodon teeth. Eventually we'll corner the fucking market. We'll be the only people with Megalodon teeth. And then we can drive the

price up however much we fucking want. Ooh I like the sound of that See that? Ooh. Oh Jesus Christ. I'm? Ooh. Oh, Jesus. I'm so sorry. Oh, my God.

I'm so sorry about that. That's just bile. Yeah. It's... Ooh. Wipe that off you. You don't want that on you. Vile bile.

That's some vile bile, dude. Yeah. Rhyming. Rhyming. Rhyming, dude. Rhyming is fun. Rhyming Ryan? Slant?

Is that a bit of a slant that's a slant rhyme rhyming Ryan it's a very very close to to being the same two words yeah what about crying Ryan that's not a slant rhyme that's just a rhyme yeah even though it's an I N and an A N yeah it's well you know it's

pronounced oh you're right it's not Ryan it's not crying Ryan can you find a way to make crayon rhyme with my name crying Ryan right wait what was that crying crying

I'm drawing with some crayons with my friend Ryan I don't know dude I'd like to formally apologize for this podcast episode this one's just called apologize for this podcast episode. This one's just called The Episode. This podcast is called The, T-H-E, all caps, Episode. Period.

No, I have to name it. The Episode. Because this is The Episode. What do you want, Peter? Be gone. Sorry, Peter. What's Peter doing? Peter was peeking in the window with his big ass googly, goofy eyes. I'm sorry.

I don't think Peter would appreciate it I made jokes like that I'm sorry Peter you're always self conscious about his eyes his eyes are just specifically the big googly one the one that fucking rotates like on it's own and just kind of feels like gravity's pulling on it down a little too hard compared to the other one he said he wanted to attach a spring to it yeah well he should go to a doctor

he shouldn't that's not something you should ever do yourself he's like I could be like the guy in the Ripley's believe it or not who's that who do i keep seeing at the left corner of my periphery peter i think he hears us talking about him i don't i don't know dude peter's peter pumpkin eater wait what uh don't forget to check us out on itunes and spotify um upload some never on time never on schedule um which will get better at that now that we're just on our own i hope can we just make jackson do that every week just please just stick with us we just need to find the super megaplex and once we have that everything we're losing it guys it's we're breaking down right now we need we need to get this office

and we have so much fucking cool shit planned for once we like like we're we're breaking down right now we need we need to get this office and we have so much fucking cool shit planned for once we like like we're trying to execute like a very extreme operation coming up it's going to be tight but we gotta workshop it we gotta get this tour done with because we got this tour right now that's kind of like the most important thing but then once that tour

is over the next this whole summer you guys are gonna you guys are gonna watch us just alright hell yeah those are some cool waveforms But then once that tour's over, this whole summer, you guys are going to watch us just... All right? Hell yeah. Those are some cool waveforms. See those? Yeah.

Those are nice. That's cool. Anyway, guys, thank you so much. Got plenty more videos coming throughout the week. Let us know what you want to see us play or what kind of videos you want to see us do. Working on the Japan videos right now, actually. So, I love you. There's still some tickets left.

You got just a little over a week. I need two more shows that aren't sold out. Which I, Brooklyn and Pittsburgh? I think so. I think it's Brooklyn and Pittsburgh. I might be wrong. Go to our website, supermegashow.net and see what tickets are available. Everything else is sold out.

Love you guys so much and see you. Bye. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because you know, if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's in everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now, all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and

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