supermegashow - EP 204 - Dog Eat Food, Man Angry

Episode Date: August 5, 2020

We're back! We talk about the perfect crime, Ryan tells stories about Lego, and lots of other stuff, like coding and snakes. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Exclusions and terms apply. Discounts not combinable. Thanks, bro. Thanks, Jackson. Sweet boy. I know. He's a treasure. He is.

Not like treasure planet. He's like a single. He is. Not like a treasure planet. He's like a single piece of gold. He's not like a treasure chest. He's like a single doubloon. Yeah, exactly. You find the doubloon and you see a trail of him and then you find your way to glory. Exactly, yeah. He's not the prize at the end of the tunnel, but he is a prize you'll find on the way.

Exactly. Are you going to throw away the doubloon? No. After you find the treasure? If you find one little emerald on the way to the treasure chest, you're not going to just cast that to the side. You'll probably put that in your pocket and go, I remember the first little bit of this journey.

Exactly. And that's what Jackson is. That's exactly what he is. And he's back now. He's back in the office. We're all back. We're all back. We're back in the office.

We're here. We can breathe each other's air. Spit in my office. We're all back. We're back in the office. We're here. We can breathe each other's air. Spit in my mouth. I think I actually did. Salty. Did something land in your mouth? Yeah. It was a big hold on. I got a loogie for you. Yeah. See, no coronavirus

here because I got tested and I was negative. And I didn't because I don't have to because I'm Ryan. Because he doesn't go out anywhere. No, exactly. I literally don't know how you could catch it. But I still feel like somehow you're going to be the one that's going to get it. You're going to be the one that's going to get it out of all of us. I could get it from 7-Eleven, I guess.

You could get it from 7-Eleven, yeah. From other people's dirty hands that touch my food. Those disgusting restaurant workers. I make sure that I carry around hand sanitizer in my car now. Same. Every time I get in. I have a big glob of it. Sometimes it's hot because it stays out in the sun all day.

What if it explodes in my car? Then your car will be sanitized. You don't have to worry about... Anytime you're scared of getting coronavirus go sit inside I'm so glad we don't have to record on discord delay anymore I know as smoothly as that went

I'm glad to be recording in person with you again my friend it's nice my brother it's nice that we're back we've been waiting for this the last few months have been off obviously for obvious reasons. But now,

we've settled into the fact that this is here to stay. So, we're gonna stop moping around and we're gonna get this shit back into action. We're gonna start drunk drawing back up. All this good shit. So, keep your eyes peeled. The long hiatus is coming to a close.

It's almost over. We just have to actually record the shit this week. We have to make a bunch of shit this week. We got some Let's Plays coming. We got some mail. Some videos. Got some shows. One particular one.

And we have that other thing that we got to maybe next week start working on. Yes. We have also, above all the regular content, we have two big projects. The big ones. I hope we can fucking pull them off this year. It'd be pretty epic if we could. It would. Well, we're back, though.

I'm going to put in a big confetti right there. Visually? No. No, no, no. Just the sound. No visual confetti. there visually no no no no just the sound no visual confetti i mean i guess i could no because then if we go back and re-download the video to use then there's gonna be a random spot of confetti that's true that's true that's absolutely true so yeah i don't think we're gonna do that i want to continue to kind of be a little lazy did you download for last week's

episode did you just grab the one from no No, because I know you used it. You did it. You put a little intro in there. Yeah. Yeah. No, I used the one from like the first episode. Well, I sent you the actual just the video. Did you?

Yeah. Over WeTransfer. Okay. When you asked me to. I didn't forget. You didn't? I didn't forget. It's there.

It's probably not anymore. Expired probably. I didn't see it because we so much WeTransfer shit goes through the chambers. Through the pipes, bro. It's always popping in and out of there. Probably lost it when I was doing my ramen video. Which I did do. I didn't just mention it on the podcast and never do it.

I watched it. It's on the Patreon. You have another video for Patreon, too. Yes. Justin and I have another video. Hell yeah. That while Matt was gone, we decided to hop on Discord and watch some monkey videos. I'm excited for that one.

I haven't seen it, but I have seen it. I liked your Ramdan video. And at the end, when you put the mayonnaise and the cheese on it, at first I was like, oh, Ryan's actually like, that's just how he eats it, I guess. No. Ew. Dude, I like mayonnaise makes a lot of things like makes a lot of foods better. But if you have too much mayonnaise and you're and you're and you just feel like you're eating a big bowl of noodley mayonnaise. It's not nice.

Especially with some cheese. Because cheese, I love cheese, but when you put it with other things that probably it shouldn't go with, your brain starts to go, is this rancid? Is this gone bad? Not the cheese, just the whole meal.

Right, because that flavor only works with certain other notes. Exactly. And mayonnaise with noodles is just, I don't want my, like that just, noodles are already pretty slimy and slippery. And that makes it like 10 times worse. And the taste of, I do like mayonnaise. Did you see how much mayonnaise I put in that shit? That was a lot of mayonnaise.

It tasted just like mayonnaise. It was just mayonnaise. When I saw it, I was like, he puts that much mayonnaise on it? And then I realized it was a joke. I was like, oh, thank God. I was like disappointed. I was like, he puts that much mayonnaise on it? Yeah. And then I realized it was a joke. I was like, oh, thank God. I was like disappointed. I was like, oh, no, Ryan. Oh.

But, hey. You know. Yeah. Have you ever just eaten a spoonful of mayonnaise? No. Is that the most mayonnaise you've ever consumed? Yes. Did you finish it?

Maybe not. Because I feel like deviled eggs have a shit ton of mayonnaise in them. I feel like on some old Game Grumps livestream, Brian Wecht put mayonnaise in my mouth or something. He probably did. Is it mayonnaise? Is it mayonnaise? He takes a spoon of mayonnaise in my mouth. Yep, Brian, that's mayonnaise.

It could be Elmer's Glow. It could be Jiffy Puff. It could be insulation from my attic. Fiberglass. it could be insulation from my attic fiberglass it could be the encrusted pre-cum I collected getting excited for this bit he gets it on the tip of his penis and then he

goes out in the sun to let it dry and he scrapes it off and he does it again until he has a nice amount of it and then he put that in my mouth on the live stream not a fan of that I'd gag, I'd spit I would just hate a big glob of mayonnaise in my mouth

would you rather have the pre-cum in your mouth? yes really? yes there's at least some I feel like more people shoot down globs of cum.

Like they just, globs of cum more than they do mayonnaise. I don't think many people will take a spoonful of mayonnaise, but I think a lot of people each day take a spoonful of cum. Not necessarily measuring it in a spoon, but, you know, collectively it'll shoot on their forehead, up their nose, in the back of their throat, wherever you're coming, it'll shoot for a good, nice spoonful. Well, I agree with you, but people, when they swallow the cum, most, nine out of ten times it's in a sexual context, so that's why they don't mind, because they're horny. Yes, but that's one of the reasons why it is better. But if you're on the stream, you're not going to be horny,

and so I think that eating mayonnaise would feel a lot more normal than just eating cum. Well, it depends on who you are because there's exhibitionism, which as you know, so that could probably prompt you to be like, oh shit, I'm eating a spoonful of cum on a live stream. This is hot. I'm going to jack off to this thought later of myself eating a spoonful of cum on a live stream. Okay. I'm not saying I do that. I'm saying like in this theoretical world where you're eating.

Even if you wanted to. Because you just had mayo. You didn't have a spoonful of, did you have a spoonful of cum? There was no cum. It was just mayo. And I do think that happened. I feel like I have a memory of that happening.

He gave a lot of people mayonnaise. Sounds like an advertisement for a shitty fast food chain That's bragging about the wrong things Hey, no cum, just mayo Are you tired of having cum on your burger? Well come on over to Cum Burgers Where oddly enough, we don't put cum on your burger

Just mayo There's not even any meat Cum Burgers Some good shit What was I gonna say? Fucking fuck Just mayo. There's not even any meat. Cumburgers. But I, uh... Some good shit. What was I gonna say? Fucking fuck. Something.

I'm kidding. God damn it. I can't, I can't, I can't stop. Hey, hold on. Something stupid, I'm sure. I have faith in what... Stupid in a good way. Because we're stupid.

Our channel's very stupid. Oh, thanks, man. Cut out when I said the bad word. I will. I won't leave it in there. Cut out when I said the bad word. I will. I won't leave it in there. I'll put it at the very end of the podcast so only the people that listen all the way to the end can hear it.

How come Ryan is the only one that gets bleeped out on Super Mega? It's because he says naughty things. Yeah. That wouldn't go over well with his mammy and grandmammy. What is that? Is that Coca-Cola?

Yeah. Let's go feff it. My morning Coke. I knew a kid growing up that every morning he would drink a Vault. Remember Vault? That's disgusting. That green, like that was his, and if he didn't, he'd get a migraine. He'd have his head down the whole like day on his death.

I feel like it would give him a migraine. I guess. Well, with caffeine, you get so dependent on it to a point that. Yeah, same with nicotine. You get nicotine headaches. Yeah. Bless you. I thought of like

kind of the perfect crime recently because i was thinking about this when i was laying in bed one night just to be um break into people's houses but don't steal anything just like take a shit and don't flush it because i I guarantee when someone finds that, they're not going to know someone else came, broke into their house. But even if they did and they call the police, the police have much bigger things to worry, but they're not going to deal with collecting the sample of the,

of the feces. They're like, why does it matter? But if you keep doing it, they might, if you become like a serial shitter, I'll become a serial shitter in different houses. They'll break in, take a shit and just leave it it and it's exhilarating because you're leaving behind

strict dna evidence but you know the police they don't give a fuck why are they going to take their time and put on gloves and pick the poop up and send it off to a lab i know right now because that's not really a crime yeah plus these days the police are dealing with enough they have to they have to deal with all of all these twitter threads talking mean about them exactly that's not really a crime. Yeah. Plus, these days, the police are dealing with enough. They have to deal with all these Twitter threads talking mean about them. Exactly. That takes a big toll on them. And the people putting tampons in their Starbucks coffee. What?

The people putting tampons in their Starbucks coffee. Are people putting tampons in... No, a police officer said that a girl at Starbucks put a tampon in his coffee. Another police department also said that apparently, think it was a shake shack uh had some like cleaner solution in their burgers and officers got sick and then it turned out to be a total fabrication same with the uh tampon thing because they checked the security camera footage and they were like nope that there's no way that there was a tampon in your drink and there's also that that poor lass who, what was it? The viral video that went around

a while, like a few weeks ago with the how long was it? With the McDonald's cop. I got a McDonald's in my phone. Oh yeah. I had to wait. I swear to God. I'm sorry. I don't mean to

bring it up because it's so old. It makes me a boomer because I'm not up to date with stuff. A boomer? But Jesus Christ. Like, never have I gotten to the moment where I've cried over waiting for McDonald's. Even for 10 minutes. Like, I've waited. Sometimes you'll wait a long time at the curb.

Dude. That's just what it is. That McDonald's in Glendale? You know the one I'm talking about? That one on San Fernando Road, let me tell you something I went there once The one right near the Denny's in the 7-Eleven? In the AutoZone? Yep, and the Pep Boys

Maybe it's not an AutoZone Is there an AutoZone there? It's right across the street I thought I was wrong for a second I don't want to be wrong I hate being wrong It's right across the street. I thought I was wrong for a second. Don't worry. You're not wrong. There's an auto zone there. I hate being wrong. But you fucking, I went there and I ordered myself an ice cream cone and it was like 2 a.m.

I waited in the drive-thru line for probably like 25, 30 minutes. And there were like three cars in front of me. They just didn't move. And then they gave me the ice cream cone. Did you cry? I did. I did cry a little bit. Yeah.

But are you an officer of the law? No. See, there's the difference. So I didn't watch that full video. Was she crying because they were disrespecting her by making her wait? Here's the thing. I think, obviously, she was crying over spilled milk. I tend to think that that's not the main reason she was crying i want to give her the

benefit of the doubt and say that she was crying because she was so overwhelmed with whatever was going on in her life and it's one of those things where it's like she comes home and her husband's fucking the dog so they have to get a divorce uh her parents get pneumonia for some reason. All of a sudden, people hate cops now. They're not buying them milk and all that at the storefront as they used to. And so all these things combine. All of a sudden, that one thing that happens, she's waiting for this. The McDonald's food is the only good part of her day at this point.

She just wants her fucking biscuit or whatever she ordered. She has so much going on in her life. She's got a divorce to worry about. She's got her parents that are sick. And she's got a world that hates her. And the last thing that she needs is her food taking too long or being forgotten about. And you know what happened? Her food was forgotten about. and she was left waiting.

And that was the straw that broke the camel's back. Can we do a charity stream for her? Yeah. I would love to do that. Just to help her out. Get her a bunch of McDonald's gifts. Well, let's raise like $60,000, but only put it into McDonald's gift cards. So she's just stuck with $60,000 mcdonald's gift cards so she's just stuck with 60 000 but

on mcdonald's gift cards which not not a horrible thing no no it's better better than subway gift cards i'd probably just give them to homeless people at that point because i'm never going to spend 60 grand at mcdonald's how much do you think the average american okay you and i are big fans of McDonald's. Unfortunately. And I feel bad when I say that because I know a lot of people are like, oh, that's trash food.

It is. I'm fully, I'm not saying it's good food. I'll have McDonald's over and out any day, baby. I'm not saying it's good food. I accept that it's trash food, but it's good. Well, like,

they got the formula just right. Here's the thing. It tastes good. Kraft Mac and Cheese. Easy Mac. It's not real mac and cheese formula just right. Here's the thing. It tastes good. Kraft mac and cheese. Easy mac. It's not real mac and cheese, but to me, it's better. A Lunchables pizza. It ain't real pizza, but goddamn is it good.

But who is to say what's pizza and what's not pizza, Ryan? Well, it is technically, I guess, a little miniature pizza, but it's not like a New York style pizza. Like if they served it at a restaurant and tried to call it pizza, there would, a little miniature pizza, but it's not like a New York style pizza. Like if they served it at a restaurant and tried to call it pizza, there would be a bad Yelp review. I would love to see them try to serve a Lunchables pizza at like a fine dining restaurant.

And it's like $600. To get away with it. Dude, holy shit. How is that not a video? Like trying to pass Lunchables or trying to pass kids cuisine, like doing what you can to make it look. And so if if a rich person looks at it and eats it and oh, it's really good. You pass the test. It's all about disguising.

That's genius. That is low quality food. 20 bucks BuzzFeed is going to steal this idea now and make a video like we fed rich people. Just like they stole my Raven SimoneSymoné fart tweet! They stole one of Jackson's tweets, too. Was it about farts? Wait, Jackson! Come here!

He's running. Kramer. Right here. So, BuzzFeed stole one of your tweets? Speak loudly. Um, so, you, Buzz, Buzzfeed stole one of your tweets? They, uh, they... Speak loudly. Buzzfeed posted an article where they quoted, or, like, linked one of my tweets in it, and it was, like, 10 questions millennials have for Gen Z people.

First of all, I'm Gen Z myself, so I took offense to that. But, uh, yeah, it was, like, something like, why do Gen Z people hate eyebrows? Or something like that. Because, like, it was during the time when everybody was like shaving their eyebrows off. But the lesson, they stole your, they stole it. Yeah, they stole it. They stole one of his too. About farting.

He has one about Raven-Symoné farting a stinky, stinky fart. And I go, when you let out a stinky, stinky fart and it's Raven-Symoné doing this and then she goes, yep, that's me. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, that's good. And they stole it? They put it on BuzzFeed. Yeah. Well, I guess. I mean, they then she goes, yep, that's me. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, that's good. And they stole it? They put it on BuzzFeed, yeah. Well, I guess...

I mean, they gave me credit. They gave me credit, too, but... I didn't give them permission. Just like how Steven Spielberg has to work for, like, E.T. and all those wonderful films, and he has a stake in those, I have a stake in my tweets. Those are artistic representations of my mind and my thoughts. How much ad revenue do you think they made off of that one article? Probably a couple thousand

dollars. Well, also, like, when you get a celebrity as high status as myself, you're going to get a lot of traffic going there. Yeah, exactly. Because of that. So the ad revenue's going to be way higher. And you're not getting a cut of that pie. I tried to get my lawyers to contact them, but no dice so far. Damn.

It's nice to see that I'm not alone in being funny enough that they steal my far. Damn. It's nice to see that I'm not alone in being funny enough that they steal my tweets. It would have to suck to not be funny enough on Twitter for that to happen to you. One thing I will say is I do agree with you. It is a nice feeling to

know that my tweet was comical enough for the geniuses over at BuzzFeed to copy and paste it into one of their articles. Yeah, exactly. Like, you know, I just get the image of, like, a little monkey at a typewriter. Yeah. See, right?

I don't feel like writing an article today. What do I do? Let me just screen cap ten tweets. About farts. See, about farts. It's got to be easy to work at BuzzFeed. Ryan, the funny thing is that implies that they ever write an article. What are we, a bunch of right-wing assholes, huh?

Yeah. We're coming down on the cucks now? Yeah. The cucks are our friends. That's true. Not food. But what I was saying before any of this Well first of all I'm upset they never stole one of my tweets

Because that makes me feel like Maybe my tweets aren't funny enough No it should yeah You need to work on them a bit Could you help me? Yeah you know my tweets are so hilarious They are though And I tweet all the time

Your tweets are always zingers. Here, I have... He don't miss. I'll shit... How about this? This will never be a tweet. I have something in my drafts. Are you ready?

Are you ready? Oh, my God. Look at my drafts. This is a good one. I only have one thing in my drafts. Actually, it's probably gone by now. Oh, wait. Oh.

Dear God, IDK if you use Twitter, but I was wondering if you could just throw in a JK about this whole COVID thing. Amen. Is that a high one? That's definitely a high one. I have some high ones. I want to try to start collecting my high tweet thoughts

and never post them. I think they're called Ryan hot. Ryan's high thoughts. Damn it. And it's a picture of you with like bloodshot eyes. Really badly photoshopped. When I stream, I I'm usually high and

the code word is praying because I don't want to get deep, whatever they'll do on Twitch. So you're praying? Yeah. I like that. I say I'm feeling very spiritual right now. I just prayed. I just prayed. Who else prayed? Just shit like that. My drafts are actually gone because when I was in South Carolina

I told you I uninstalled Twitter while I was home. Deleted all my drafts. Really? So that's actually a bummer. I didn't know that it would delete the drafts if I took the app off of my phone. Well, much like when God struck his mighty vengeance down on the earth with a flood, you get a chance to renew. That's, you know, Ryan, I like you because you're always putting a positive spin

on all this shit that sucks. And I really like that about you. You know, in these times, you kind of have to. Or else everything sucks. What I was going to ask was, before the whole BuzzFeed tweet debacle, I want to know,

because I was saying, you and I like McDonald's a lot. Yeah. And I want to know how much... Yeah, Jackson I like McDonald's a lot and I want to know how much you can go bye Jackson so you and I do like McDonald's a lot I have to say I haven't had it since we're back here okay

I haven't had McDonald's since I went to South Carolina and I do I crave it I can't I should not order it because since I went to South, since performing in South Carolina. And I do, I crave it. I can't, I should not order it because I've gotten to the habit of not only ordering McDonald's in of itself is not good for you, but I go the extra mile and I order that 13 cookie tote with some milk and then I'll just dip the cookies in milk and i'll be like but do that following morning oh not fun some heartburn well i brought this up because it's like how much money do you think in your life ever you've spent on mcdonald's hundreds no way it's been more than hundreds no way about it thousands when you order

mcdonald's from like postmates it usually is going to come out to be between $20 and $30. You're talking about McDonald's. This has nothing to do with courier costs or tips. Okay. Strictly on the food at McDonald's. Probably thousands though, right? Because.

Fuck. I don't know. Think about it. A Big Mac meal is like eight bucks. You know? But I don't get a Big Mac. You get the two cheeseburgers. One plain.

One with cheese. I get. With ketchup and mustard. You're almost there. Here, let me get it for you. I thought I knew this, dude. I get a double cheeseburger plain, nothing but the cheese, meat, and bun. And then I get a hamburger with only ketchup and mayonnaise. And then I get a small fry with a Coke.

I thought it was mustard. No. It used to be just ketchup, but now I've added mayonnaise because I do like the combination of the two together. Just brought it all full circle. Back to the mayonnaise. And you're like, Ryan, and people are probably like, Ryan, you had a full burger and said you actually liked it when your friend Matt

cooked you up a big burger. And to that I have to say, while it was good, I do have to say I think it's like The quality of the ingredients Like Crisp lettuce is something that I want I don't want soggy ass McDonald's lettuce

I don't know McDonald's lettuce is cut up into little shreds So it's crunchy We need to mark that microphone Just so if we have to take these down Put them back up I don't get confused and grab that one. Well, this one's literally pinned onto this side of the

table with my seat. But if we ever pack them into a box and then unpack them, we're not gonna remember whose is whose. Well, find me a silver sharpie and I'll put my initials on them. I'll sign it. Autograph it. And then one day we'll sell it. This is the mic that Ryan farted into on multiple occasions. I did that also with the Grumps mics.

They're still talking into them, those suckers. Those sons of a bitch. Those idiots. Those fucking dumb... But basically, Danny's lips, every now and then, because you know when recording, it happens by accident, his lips are brushing against

the same mic that you literally pushed into your gym shorts, into where your asshole is farted. on on probably at least at the press 30 plus the orifice of my asshole at least 30 plus times yeah I'd say over the course of recording there so likely yes so Danny puts his mouth up to that and if he knew oh Jesus Christ Ryan what the hell it's hurting my vocal cords uh your poop flakes will get into my throat and i'll sound just like fucking justin bieber i wish i was just like just uh danny um uh it's someone pointed out uh for those who don't know who we're talking about

danny sex bag the one and only uh someone pointed out that our rend who don't know who we're talking about, Danny Sexbank. The one and only. Someone pointed out that our rendition of him sounds like a South Park character. And I realized that because when I was back home, I watched the Michael Jackson episode of South Park, the Jeffersons. And I realized that our Danny impression sounds just like... Michael Jackson. Like Mr. Jefferson. Mr. Jefferson. Hey, Mr. Jefferson. That's Jefferson. Hey, Mr. Jefferson. That's pretty good.

Damn it, Carmen. It's the South Park voice. You gotta do this. It's like at the beginning of the Book of Mormon, they have a South Park voice kind of narrowly. Narrowly? Narrowly? No, it's not like a specific voice from South Park, but you can tell it's... It's...

One day, Jesus was... Like, it's one of those. It's very South Park, but you can tell it's it's one day Jesus was, like it's one of those. It's very South Park. Yeah. Book of Mormon's still my favorite musical of all time. I have yet to see it still. So good. I won't have any chance to see it anytime soon. Nope. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals

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Yeah, because I was really hanging on for the last few months like it'll be done soon it'll be done I've just got accepted this point like it's not gonna be done soon so no I've kind of well it's not true but I'm trying to have this mindset just like this is the new what is act like this is what it's gonna be for years I think I'm gonna go fast even though it's not gonna be like this for years just make this the new normal. You have to get used to it or else you're going to continuously just be like, oh, this sucks. Yeah, it'll go faster if you accept it as the new

norm because then you're not constantly like, is it almost over? Is it almost over? And believe me, I understand people. It can get lonely. I did not see a real human being since Matt left for South Carolina until today. So that was July 13th I last saw you, or 12th, which I can't remember which one.

I think it was 13th. So three weeks. Yeah, three weeks. It was just me and Lego all alone. And even when I was self-quarantining for my Uncle Beans when he was visiting. God rest his soul. I hope he visits again this year but um it's not looking likely no it's not but the hell is that is there an airline taking off

in someone's back does someone have a private it sounds like a jet just flew over the house that was really no that's not like one of those sounds when you're in a minecraft cave it's like oh yeah that's where they are we near like a cave or something with with some mobs inside of it what was i talking about the time i uncle beans before oh yeah being lonely um it's just like i understand but it's nice yes it is nice dude lego's been such a fucking little little shit recently really He's having a little shit phase. He's usually good about not going after human food. But if I, but if, okay, so I ordered some wings and I felt bad.

Don't worry. It's not a sin, Ryan. You know, if you already ate it, there's no point in feeling guilty. Yeah. I ordered some wings and some mozzarella sticks that I was excited to eat. They were honey wings, by the way.

Good ass. That's good. Honey wings are delicious. Fuck. It was from a, I can't remember where it was from. One of those Asian doodads, you know? Yeah. One of those places.

Yep. But I go outside to have my celebratory cigarette because I'm like, I can't wait to eat this bountiful feast harvest. And I go back in and Legos licking his chops. And I'm like, what's going on? I look mozzarella sticks are still there. I look at the wings. There were like seven or eight of them in there. Just big old fucking wings gone. All of them seven or eight of them in there. Just big old fucking wings. Gone.

All of them? Completely. All of them? Meat and bone. All gone. He swallowed the bones? Yes. And which is not good because cooked bone is, dogs shouldn't have bones in general.

But cooked bone can splinter easily, which can cause digestive and intestinal. So for the next three days, I called a vet just to make sure I was like, Hey, should I bring them in? He's like, you can, but dogs are garbage cans. I mean, something can happen and then you should bring them in, but usually they'll pass it. And I'm like, okay, I'm just an idiot. So I, you know, 72 hours, I'm waiting to see if there's any blood in this stool. No, he's, he's pooping fine. two hours. I'm waiting to see if there's any blood in this stool. No, he's, he's pooping fine. We get to tomorrow. I'm giving him his flea medication, right? I slather some peanut butter on, on this, on this beautiful thing. It's this, it's the only thing that's worked so far. It's called a NexGuard or some shit. Had to get it, had to actually get it like prescribed by the vet.

But, um, I lather it in, uh, peanut butter And give it to the boy And he's so happy He's like wow I love this I'm like okay So I kind of just put the top back on And I think I get a phone call So I put it down And I go talk to someone

Later in the night I come around And I walk past him And he jumps up And all of a sudden I'm like what's going on And I see that he's stagnant I'm like Lego come here And he's not moving from his spot I'm like what's going on? And I see that he's stagnant. I'm like, Lego, come here. And he's not moving from his spot. I'm like, what's going on?

And then I kind of look and I see like a hint of red. I'm like, that looks like the part of the GIF logo. And lo and behold, he... So it's about a regular size of peanut butter. Peanut butter, just a regular little of peanut butter. Peanut butter. Just a regular little tube. What do you call it?

A tub? Tub? It just sounds... Not a bottle. A little jar? A little jar. A plastic jar. A jug. A plastic jug is way too big.

A small jar of Jif peanut butter. Right? Almost all of it was gone. This is a new one I opened was he doing that? he did that and he threw up twice throughout the day and I feel bad for him

throughout the day he was just laying down all miserable I'm like yeah that's what happened I'd feel like shit if I ate a whole fucking tub of peanut butter my man dude he's a fat piece of shit he is big here's the Dude, he's a fat piece of shit. He is big. I need to be better. Here's the thing. Usually he's really good about

not getting food from the counter or eating it. He'll never go for it. In all the years I've known him, he's gotten a little bit of courage. I think it was honestly those honey wings which started it because he went, damn, if I can just have this with being a little sneaky bitch, then I think it's worth it.

He's testing his limits, man. Next thing you know, he's going to have the whole Thanksgiving roast. The thing he put down on the table. Oh, but yeah. I love Lego, man. He's so fucking great. Whenever I talk about him, for me, it's like, is this what it's like to gush about your kid and about the problems you have when you have a kid? Yes, probably.

I know it's not the same thing, of course. problems you have when you have a kid yes i know it's not the same thing of course but i have to imagine owning a pet has triggers something in your brain that's similar to owning a small child owning a small child yeah no it's uh yeah my wife and i just started owning our first child i mean when you adopt a child what do you do you're You're owning it. You buy it. You buy that child. No, you just pay for the adoption fees. No, you literally just sold that child with money. You didn't just give it. I never thought of that that way. You didn't just give them

parents. You made those parents pay a ridiculous amount of money. So now they legally own the child. Yeah. Wow. I never thought of it that way. It would, but I, on the other hand, I don't think I would want any system that just gives kids away for free. Yes. So there has to be some sort of balance.

Free kids. I was real sad because right before I left to go back to South Carolina. You didn't give me a kiss. Well, it's because I was distraught because the kittens had to go away. That's right. No more cats. Yeah. That's right no more cats That's a good thing It's a great thing My house is so clean right now And so back to normal

It's a blessing disguised as a curse It's so nice We've been keeping the house I think that really opened our eyes We've been keeping the house super clean and fresh since then Like it does not get dirty And it's really nice My dishes

I've been keeping my place clean But the one place I could work on is always dishes and laundry cause I'm always in need of I always run out of clothes and I kind of I go the route of the route of

washing them drying them and then leaving all the clothes in the dryer and then in the morning just opening up the dryer and be like okay there's my underwear. I'll wear these pants and this shirt today. That's how I pick out my clothes on a normal quarantine day. You're lucky I don't have a dryer. So I have to come to the office.

You have to do laundry. So then I really have to. You just have a wash? Yeah. Because I bought the dryer and it fit perfectly above the washer into the space in my house but the mounting kit added or the stacking kit added one inch so they're like sorry we can't do it it's too tall and i went back to best buy so i had to return the the dryer and when i went back and i was like hey uh the guy told me i can just get a different brand that will fit and they're like no that will

void our warranty you can't mix and match brands so just have a washer dry things out in the backyard you yeah hang dry is nice but you could just go for the all in one but that's just a that's a whole

that's a whole can of worms you don't want to adult too much. No. You know, it's hard adulting as it is. But the kittens are gone. A lot of people on Instagram didn't seem to quite understand the concept of fostering kittens. Wait, were they like, how could you just, what, so you liked them when they were kittens and then you threw them away? Yeah, a group of people thought that I literally adopted six cats and then just dumped them off at a PetSmart when I didn't want them anymore.

These are people who say they know and care about animals but actually have never done anything to help them. Because the first thing you know when talking about animal care or anything like that, usually you'll think of adoption and fostering. about like animal care or anything like that, usually you'll, you'll think of adoption and fostering and fostering is a huge part of the adoption process because, um, you can't, you can't house all of the animals, uh, all of these places, uh, kennels or whatever. They can't house all of the animals. So they need fostering families, which help out. So these places don't go to kill shelters, other, other places that, uh, would not be good for them.

So for those who did not know, I applied for this foster place. Explain yourself. I applied for this foster place. Sure you did a really nice thing. You took animals in and you helped raise them and your house took a beating for it. So explain yourself.

Well, I got them the day they were born and then I raised them until they were three months old and then I had to give them back to the adoption agency where they gave them all their vaccines and then they put them up for adoption and people were mad because some of them ended up in PetSmart's adoption. Did they? Wait, you can

see pictures of them? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everyone's like, PetSmart's evil. How could you can see pictures of them? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, wow. But everyone's like, PetSmart's evil. How could you do this to these cats? But PetSmart is not actually handling the cats. There are volunteers with the agency that go. They're just housed there right now. Yeah. In a little, I saw pictures.

They have friends to play with and very sweet. And some of them have been adopted. I'm very happy for them. But yeah, i'm actually thinking about soon getting another six or seven cats and then dumping them off on the side of the road when i'm done with them i don't think like i i think the only animal like i feel like i could definitely maybe get a cat i feel like at pet smart i just look at fish or hamsters and stuff. Because I don't know, there's... I went through an adoption place in Los Angeles to get Lego.

And I don't know if I've told this story or not. I originally was not supposed to get Lego. Do you remember this story? Yeah, I do, I do, yeah. I was supposed to get a dog named... Her name was Cujo. Yep. She was very fluffy and soft looking.

I was so excited I recently been both of us have but from my perspective I've been going through a lot of shit and for me I've always grown up with a dog and that companionship is something that I need I love it

and so I go to the adoption place and it's set up I'm finally gonna meet kujo who you know i had a meeting you were excited yeah uh so i got there and i'm like okay i'm here to i brought my dad and everything and uh we're here to meet uh kujo and their face just went and i was like wait what's going on they went we actually just gave Cujo to someone and it's like why did you schedule a visit with me if someone else all right it was just this big thing I remember my dad he wasn't like customer service like Karen mad was he a Karen no no no he was just

he he wasn't like how could you do this I remember I walked out because I was just like upset I was like just anxious and like I this this sucks this brings down everything I think my dad just was like you guys really don't know how bad this is just because like of what I went through recently like he wasn't like how bad this is for them. Just like how much this sucks for me. Yeah. And I think he was like, y'all need to make this up to him. And then he left. And I love my dad for that.

He was very straight up. And I got an email that same day with a long winded apology and a picture of Lego plus dibs. They were like, Hey, this dog, uh, this dog came in. His name's Legolas.

And, uh, if you, uh, want to adopt him, you'd have, you'd have first dibs. Uh,

if you want to meet him also, nobody else has met him. He has no scheduled appointments. You are the first one to meet him. 100% guaranteed. And I remember going, I don't know. I just like,

I was so looking forward. I couldn't imagine not having Lego. Yeah, Lego's great. I could not imagine not having Lego. He is my shining star. He's your something stone, whatever it's called. I've said this multiple times. I have no idea where I would be without Lego.

And I'm just glad that finally I can give him a decent kind of back area to run around in. Yeah. For the longest time we were in an apartment and he would have to kind of just kind of, he was kennel trained also a little at Mark's when we, when we kind of lived with Mark. Um,

but now he has a, just a nice backyard. He's got a nice backyard. I hang out with him. I, I talked to him like he's a fucking person. Bring him over and let him run around in my backyard. Okay. got a nice backyard. I hang out with him. I talk to him like he's a fucking person. You should bring him over and let him run around in my backyard. Okay.

He'd love it. I also, I wish I could have kept Billy. I saw so many people asking me on Instagram, like, why didn't you keep Billy? I know you were debating it. Billy, I wanted to keep so bad. You'd have to keep two, right? Yeah. They had a policy where they said that it is psychologically damaging for young cats

to grow up alone. So at least until they're six months, they have to live with another cat of like equal energy, which would have meant that we would have to adopt two cats. Okay. And honestly, like we already have four people living here. Plus, Christian just moved onto our couch. We're just not in a place to take two cats in right now. So, unfortunately... Do you see yourself getting a pet? You were talking about a snake

before you left. I do want to get a snake. Yeah, like a... The one that I want you to get is the corn one. Little corn snakes? Little corn snake, because they're red and tan and black. Red next to black, a friend of Jack. But red next to yellow, kill a fella. Oops.

That's the classic rhyme I remember. If you're in the woods and you see a snake and it has red, yellow, and black stripes, red next to yellow, it'll kill a fella. You know, that rhyme could mean two things. Either a poisonous snake or it could be a commentary on the racism of America. Red next to black, free to chat. Wait, that's about snakes? See, you can tell it's from World War II.

But red next to yellow? Ooh, that'll kill a fella. They just bomb Pearl Harbor. I guess it could apply to that, yeah. That's great. I do want a snake. I like corn snakes. I think they're beautiful.

But then I also found the little green ones. I i just like the green i like those two they're just they're like the perfect image of like a serpent you know like you think of like a cartoon snake it's always green i remember that i love it because here's the thing you you would have so much love for that snake the snake would have zero emotional connection i love i love seeing videos of like snake owners there's this one that i saw recently i think it was this snake that like was just just bit onto this girl's ear and she was like kind of crying and she's like uh she's like what's going on i'm like that snake doesn't care it doesn't care you've owned it for like years it doesn't even know who you are like what are just like, what are you doing? Put me down. The snake has no idea who you are. I know.

What? Okay. Let me see how long a snake's memory is. Okay. Because goldfish is what? Like five seconds? Is it? Yeah.

Holy shit. How long is a snake's memory? What do they have? It might be impressive. You might be impressed by a snake's memory. Okay. I'm on Quora.com. Fuck Quora, dude dude they make you sign

them if you click on a second question i used to i used to ask quora all the time i remember it was like in middle school or something you could text their number be like four six six four some shit i can't remember what it was cha-cha it was cha-cha yeah not not not that it was cha-cha holy there was another one there was kgb and there was Cha Cha But do you remember Cha Cha you'd be like How you doing and like the guy if they wanted to have fun Were like I'm doing pretty good And like they would just have a little personal response I remember I used Cha Cha to ask sex questions

I was too embarrassed to ask my parents When I was in middle school But you know that's a real person that either looks it up on Google real quick Or types it out themselves I remember I wanted one of those jobs just to fuck with people So here's the answer on snakes, though. They do have memory, but they don't process it through an emotional brain. So they learn by experience, so it stays with them.

Like, this animal is dangerous. That one's not. This is prey. This is not. But they don't have an emotional response to those memories. So your snake might remember you as a food source, but it's never going to be like... Yeah, they might see you and be like,

okay, I don't have anything to worry about. Yeah, so, you know... But it's not like a cat or dog where it recognizes you as another entity. They do have emotional sides of their brains, you know? Yeah. Where snakes are just... You know, I say dogs and cats, but they're not the only animal that can develop emotional bonds

with humans. Elephants, pigs, dolphins, whales, monkeys, monkeys, octopi, with humans. Elephants. Pigs. Dolphins. Dolphins. Whales. Monkeys. Monkeys. Octopi? That's about it. Octopi. Actually, I found out that octopi is not the correct Octopus? It's octopuses.

Octopi is apparently just like not really the correct word. Sounds nice to say. I read recently that octopi is a word, but like it's up to your preference, but it really is not like the correct form of the plural. Well, octopuses then. And if I'm wrong, the fucking Wikipedia warriors in the comments are going to roast me to death for that. But I can't imagine all birds, but some birds.

Parrots? Crows? I've always wanted a parrot. You could get a really nice relationship with a crow or a raven. They'd recognize your faces. Yeah. really nice relationship with a crow or a raven they'd recognize your faces yeah and also i've always wanted a pair like one of those beautiful like macaque not macaque macaque whatever they're called the pretty colorful ones right the big ones yeah like red and blue and yellow i've always

wanted one of those but the problem is first of all they scream all the time birds scream in general and they live to be like 70 that's's why you gotta remove their quack box. Remove their quack box? Yeah. Then it can't talk to me. There's no such thing as a quack box. Damn it, dude, you caught me! But they fucking, I love parrots so much, but they stink, they poop a lot, they scream,

they don't shut up, and they live to be like 70, which means that when you adopt a parrot, like, you're gonna have that for the rest of your life. So that's, that is a commitment. Imagine owning a tortoise. That thing would be alive until you're dead. Hitler's pet tortoise just died. Really? Yeah, like a couple weeks ago, actually. Good, that son of a bitch.

That fucking Hitler Nazi asshole. Fucking turtle Nazi bitch. Fucking bitch ass tortoise Nazi. get out of here tortoise with two s's in it get it well did we know it's like i could imagine you know how they uh when when world war ii ended how a lot of uh x higher up like nazi echelon people fled to like argentina yeah they fled to argentina and they tried to other lives. Imagine this turtle's doing the same thing. You have a whole CIA operation of

trying to find this turtle. You have this turtle living its happy life. He has all the nuclear secrets. Then they take him to the Nuremberg trials. Put him before the judge and the jury and everything. They sentence the tortoise to death. That's how he died. You're sentenced to tortoise prison.

Just put him in a dog kennel. Oh my god, he tortoise hung himself in his cell. No! The tortoise cameras were off. The little tortoise cameras and the rabbit security guards. In another universe, it's just tortoise Epstein. And the hair security guards

were all asleep. Yep! She's still kicking it, surprisingly. Jelaine? Jelaine, yeah. Jizzlane. Dude, I tried watching that documentary on Netflix. I think I mentioned it.

I can't remember. Did you finish it? No, because I tried to watch it again while I was eating dinner, and then I couldn't eat my dinner, and then I just changed it to something else. Yeah, it's not the best appetite stimulus about children being molested. No, it's not good. Like when you're,

imagine putting a big old, just fork full, you know, you twist a fork full of spaghetti and some meatball, you go, it's in your mouth. All of a sudden it's like, yeah, I was 14 and he started massaging my breasts and i just felt uncomfortable i'm just

like watching and listening i'm like i'll put on futurama yeah exactly like i'll watch moana i'll i'll listen to the to the pretty disney songs i don't need to listen to this fucking awful disgusting bullshit do you want to see i'm not saying like this is awful and disgusting how dare they out jeffrey epstein no Vance was trying to live his life. You want to hear how our brains differ? I put on a Tom Pearl video. You just eat while watching Tom Pearl? Well, I put on Tom Pearl to show someone.

And there was a box of pizza on the table. And just like without thinking while I was showing someone Tom Pearl, I just like took a slice and started eating it. And Carson was like, are you seriously eating pizza right now? And I was like, oh, I didn't even think about it. Tom Pearl took all his videos down, by the way. He's gone. He's gone.

And I think that maybe- Looks like exhibitionism was a friend he shouldn't have dabbled with. I'm wondering if it's because of us and our podcast. It's probably due to the fact that he's a pedophile. That is-

Sorry. No, he's a pedophile. Okay, okay. I didn't know if there was a specific term. That's on public- I, he's a pitfall. Okay, okay. I didn't know if there was a specific term. That's on public record. I wanted to respect him. Right. That is on public record, though.

We're not outing him. That's not an accusation. That's on public record. No, yeah. But I wish... I do yearn to see those videos again. It has been a while. Yeah.

And those videos were just... There's one I found on a website that's still saved where he's like, My name is Tom Perra. I'm a human toilet. I love to eat shit and drink piss. He does, though. He does. He loves to eat shit and drink piss. He has like a slight whistle and that little grin on his face. It's so

jubilant. It's so fucking joyous. It's gross. It's disgusting. It is disgusting, but it brings me not sexual pleasure, but emotional support, I would say. I can feel a poo-poo brewing. You want to go Tom Perlitt? Yeah.

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How was the poo-poo? It was nice. So, recently I saw, we all know DelloBeast, a member of the SuperMega community who makes compilations. He's made a couple for us on our channel. Recently he uploaded Best of Mario games, and it was six hours. What? And I'm like, first of all,

I don't remember ever recording Mario that long. Second, how do you find that much best of clips? It has to be just all of the content where Mario's on screen. So what I'm thinking is, like, with the amount we've talked about shit on this podcast, as in, like, feces, like, I think that the talking about doo doo compilation would be longer than six hours probably. Well, that was from two months ago, Matt. Recently, they're into Chibi Chubby.

Because they have a best of Chibi Chubby hypotheticals. Sounds familiar. And then best of Chubby Chubby real ad reads. I think that Dello Beast is cancelled. Yeah. Sorry

Dello Beast. Sorry. I can't deal with sharing the limelight. Okay. No. It's a bit too much for me. Actually, Della Beast, if you do hear this, DM me on Twitter because I have some ideas.

I thought Della Beast got off of Twitter. Oh, that's true. Okay, that would explain why I haven't heard from them so fucking long. Yeah. Well, email us.

Well, I don't think they listen. I don't know. Who knows if they still listen? They made that Mario video two months ago. Chibi Chubby might be their new Chibi Chubby's Chibi Chubby's in.

Squeeze, baby. It's good. You should go check out Chibi Chubby might be their new squeeze, baby. It's good. You should go check out Chibi Chubby, I guess, if you want. I wouldn't. I mean, if you really want to. We're not saying you have to, but if you want to, you could check it out. Yeah. It's from Rav and Shill.

The rapper. It's from Gavin and Will. Something like that. Bill broke his leg, like, really bad. Who? Will. from Gavin and Will. Something like that. Yeah. Bill broke his leg, like, really bad. Who? Will. Will broke his leg.

Ah, okay. Skrill Will. He broke his leg so bad, and, like, he can't walk or anything. Which, I guess, sucks for him. It doesn't suck for me. Or you. We're fine. We're fine.

I've never had a broken bone or fractured bone in my life. It sucks, dude.'re fine. I've never had a broken bone or fractured bone in my life. It sucks, dude. It sucks. I know. Shattered my foot, and I got a hairline fracture right here in my arm once because I was hanging from a bar at school. Well, I wish I knew what that felt like, but unfortunately, I don't. You don't want to go outside and do it?

I guarantee we could break your arm in like 30 seconds outside. A clean break? Actually, the fastest way to do it is just go in the driveway, put your arm under my car wheel, and I'll just run it over. I could just jump from a very high, let's say, just even two-story building and just deadlock my legs. I think that would actually paralyze you because the shock would go up your spine. No. Okay. Quadriplegic after that.

Well, there is that tree on the property that you can actually climb really high. Remember how high I climbed it that one time? It is a nice climbing tree. There's a lot of hefty branches. And you could, if you fell, you'd break a bone probably. Just thinking about that makes my, do your hands get sweaty when you think about heights? Like climbing? Because I know some people do.

Climbing? Climbing. So imagine you're hanging from a crane or from the edge of an airplane yeah do your hands start to sweat 100 i mean yeah i mean i think anyone's hands would sweat if they some people don't hanging out of an airplane that's actually uh like an evolutionary response apparently what i read was you hold on to things a little bit better just a little bit of uh sweat a little bit of... Sweat? A little bit of, like, moisture. Your hands are a little more sticky,

so that's, like, when I start thinking about that, my body's like, uh-oh, are we high up? Do we need to grab on better? But then if your hands get too sweaty, you're going to slip. Exactly. That's why your hands prune up, too, because you can hold on to... You can grip stuff better.

...grip rocks and stuff, so if you're slipping down a river and your hands are all pruning, grab a rock easier, you know? pruning, grab a rock easier. You know? Or you can grab a rock easier. Why not? Thank you.

I've been having a really fucking good time the last week. Doing? I've been learning something. I've always wanted to get into, like, game design. Uh-huh. But I've never been able to stick with it. get into like game design uh-huh but i've never been able to stick with it um but recently i did find a program called godot that i had heard of before yeah exactly that's everyone i tell about this like oh because she's the only other godot and there's also finding godot right it's a movie

who cares who cares that that actual has artistic integrity i'm talking about the famous actress that was in Wonder Woman. Gal Gadot? Yeah. Well, the program is like for game, indie game development, and it's incredible. And I've been doing some tutorials every day and learning how to code with it. And I'm not very good at it right now, but I'm trying to dedicate. What type of games would this be like? Anything.

You can do 3D, you can do 2D, you can do. It's incredible. So what engine do you use it's godot like it's so it's its own engine so much like how unreal is its own engine this is the godot engine what makes godot something to learn over other engines for you uh because it's just the simplicity yeah the simplicity and the amount of features it has and the the language is really easy it's basically just like python which is like one of the easiest coding languages and there's a

big growing community so if I need help there's like so many people I could ask because I follow this guy named Heartbeast his tutorial series and he's fucking awesome so I've been having fun learning that and people in the comments I'm curious how long it took you to

get okay at it because I'm hoping that my goal is by the end of the month to be able to like do a little something without having to like reference my notes or a tutorial because it is it is a lot to remember like create like a very basic script yeah yeah it's fun though i really i've been enjoying learning how to code but My brain naturally doesn't really work that way. I'm having to force it to... Some people just can... Oh, logic. That logic makes sense. That type of math

and logic just kind of bounces off my brain. Michael Reeves, I think I popped into a stream of his because I saw that he was streaming on Twitter. I was like, fuck, what does he stream? I was interested. He, what does he, what does he stream? I was interested and he was just streaming himself on a,

like he was on a computer, he was working on something but he was like putting in all these fucking values and shit. I'd have to imagine he was doing some sort of programming

or whatever he was doing. He's a genius. Yeah. Him and William, they're both like, he blew up. Michael? Yeah.

Yeah. I didn't realize how much he blew up yeah he actually just like i remember meeting him on tour yeah i think it was the first time i met him they came to a super mega show in portland and we went out got drinks with him afterwards and uh i mean they were already big but like michael reeves just well i think a lot a huge part of that also was uh i think the i-dubs collab really did a lot too. Michael Reeves collab with iDubbbz?

Yeah. He made the like stepdad robot, right? Oh, damn. And I know William collabs with him too. Then he made a, we were supposed to get tased, I think. They said that's still on the table if we want to do a video. Really? Yeah.

Damn. I would love to. But those guys are so smart. Like, they're geniuses. I don't know where you begin to even figure out how to program a hat where the bill is always facing the sun. Because William's really good with robotics and stuff. I'd love to have those boys. We have two mics right there. Those boys could come sit their asses down.

Or even just do it over Discord. I think they're both good with robotics, it seems. They're smart dudes. Do they work in just kind of like the same exact kind of field in a way? I think so. Okay. They're a good duo. I don't know them too well.

I know Michael has that podcast with like Pokimane and stuff now. Michael has a podcast with Pokimane? Yeah. And like two other people. So that's probably also why he's so big. Okay. He does a podcast. i guess i'm trying to wrap my head around it i think what's it called is it a gaming podcast i haven't listened

i don't know i don't really listen to podcasts i know pokeman ain't making robots actually she has been she's been building her own uh her own simps her own simp bot 5000 she like block the word simp or something from her from her twitch chat because people were bullying all of the simps i'm kidding i'm kidding he said the simp word are you a simp dude are you are you a fucking simp dude don't don't don't fucking simp me right now i didn't know even pokey may not a podcast uh what the hell as we were talking about rav he just dm'd me for the first time since morning he's dm'd me did he dm you a picture no he said he said hey buddy hope you're doing good the latest pod the latest episode of the podcast is fucking hilarious aww that's sweet Rev wow that's cool he sends me this

so you know as much as I would like support from my friends I guess I guess I can do with memes that's fine explain what the meme is it's a guy with a very muscular and he has a huge pair of balls.

That's you can tell the weight of those balls is dragging his, his underwear down. And, uh, a guy's asking him, are you by chance forklift certified? And then the guy says, yes.

How could you tell? Doesn't he have a, does he have a big penis in his shirt too Yeah I mean the penis is there But like I think the balls Is the more funny part to me I like the balls The shaft is straight up The shaft is straight up in his shirt I just saw the shaft

The balls are right there in his underwear The balls are literally like just in his underwear The other picture it almost swiped over to? Oh, because I sent him this one. That's a classic one, dude. I know. I had that picture like four years ago. Well, he sent me this one, which was a classic one.

I think I sent that to him. And then I've sent this to a lot of people. Dude. Oh, my God. That's one of my favorites. It's a meme where it says how the Bible see it. And it's Jesus walking on water. And then the next frame is how a fish see it and it's just cock and balls it's like it's like looking up looking up at g under jesus's gown just as and you can just see his like feet and

cock and balls like hairy little assholes well actually that picture is cemented my mind with a certain event because i got woken up we both got woken up by that earthquake. I was just about to head to bed too. So there was an earthquake at like 4 a.m. recently. I was almost asleep. And Ryan called me and then you sent me that image right after. So right before I fell back asleep, that was one of the last things in my brain. Did I tell you the first thing I did when I woke up from the earthquake?

No. I went, ah, fuck. Because I smoked some weed before going to bed because that helps me get to bed sometimes. So I woke up and I was hungry as hell. And so I just had a, I woke up from the earthquake and I just had a

big bowl of SpaghettiOs and meatballs. You know? So it was the earthquake's fault? Yeah. So the earthquake, so you wouldn't have done that if the earthquake hadn't happened? I wouldn't have done that if the earthquake hadn't happened i wouldn't have done that if the earthquake hadn't happened i would have been a good little boy and slept damn but instead i had a big bowl of spaghetti mother nature out here you know causing you to slip up i know damn that sucks man well i've been slipping up it's quarantine a lot everyone's slipping it's hard not to slip up i'm trying i had when i went home i had a really uh i was not feeling too good so i did a bunch of thinking and reading stupid

stupid shit like that so i've been i'm trying to change some shit now what were you reading cat in the hat green eggs and ham hop on pop actually but i was jb jones maybe i was reading uh the book called miracle morning it's pretty good but i haven't read that in a series of unfortunate events book which one is that i'm trying to wake up i'm trying basically the i don't have a circadian rhythm i'm trying to actually for the first time since like high school get one so i'm trying to go to bed around midnight every night and wake up between eight and nine i'm bad i just like being nocturnal. I go to bed in between 4 and 6 and then wake up in between noon and 2.

Sounds fun though. Well actually I wake up in between like 11 and 2 because some mornings I'll wake up and be like, oh damn, I still have, it's not even noon yet. That's how I felt about waking up early recently because the last week I've woken up before 10 each day and I'm like, which must feel great. It feels amazing.

It makes my day instantly better. Like even if I don't do anything, like just being up with like a cup of coffee and like even if I just watch YouTube videos or go sit outside or something, it's like, oh, feels good. My body and the way like it's working right now. I know to go to bed once I start to see the sky to turn light blue. Once I'm like, oh, yeah, the sun's coming up. I should probably go to bed. Probably. I should probably go to bed once I start to see the sky to turn light blue. Once I'm like, oh, yeah, the sun's coming up. I should probably go to bed. Probably go to bed. I like waking up early.

Well, my thing is when I wake up, I just feel like I'm too tired when I go back to sleep. But I've noticed the more I've been waking up at a consistent time, it's easier to get up. Like it's not as hard. up at a consistent time it's easier to get up like it's not as hard um and then also i've been taking like a shit ton of supplements every day estrogen well don't out me like that yeah i've been taking a bunch of supplements just like daily vitamin soy little yeah actually a little bit of soy soy bean lattes and ies. And my pills and everything. My crazy pills. And vitamins have been great, but it made me so fucking constipated.

And I almost cried earlier today. It hurt so bad. It was fucking painful. Damn. I'm going to have to add another pill. Some stool softener in there. Really? Maybe.

My stools are soft enough. It's because I think I looked it up, it's because I take iron pills. Because my thing is like, if I don't eat that much, I at least am going to try to get the nutrients I'm missing out on. What? You're not even saying anything.

So I'm trying to get the nutrients, but I think the iron is what, the iron giant, that's what you're mouthing to me. See, there you go. I think the iron is what's doing it giant. That's what you're mouthing to me. See, there you go. I think the iron is what's doing it. So, I need to take poo-poo soft tools. Have you thought about aluminum? Come on, man. You know what I'm saying?

Or as those Brits and Aussies say, aluminum. Aluminium. That's not... Jaguar. It's not spelled aluminum. Jaguar. It's spelled aluminum. Jaguar.

Jaguar. Jaguar. Jaguar. What's up, guys? I'm driving my... Jaguar. Jaguar. Jaguar. I'm. What's up, guys? I'm driving my Jaguar. I'm driving my Corvette. Get the fuck out my Corvette. Got a million different reasons that I could be a set.

So get the fuck out my Corvette. Yeah. Still have that song. I'm glad you still. Can you send that to me? I will. Because I've been wanting to hear it. You can't take it away.

I bought it. I know. It's my property. You bought it? It's your property now. Sorry, buddy. still, can you send that to me? I will. Because I've been wanting to hear it. You can't take it away. I bought it. I know. It's my property. You bought it? It's your property now. Sorry, buddy. Sorry, ex-Blake Freeman ex. Sorry, Google Music. It's mine now. I'm going to sue you to get it back. I bought it for 99 cents and oh God, 99 cents worth it. We've talked about this song before. Oh, we've talked about it.

Some people know. Get the fuck out of my Corvette. Sorry, it's just a song some funny man made. Yeah, it's just a song some some some funny man made yeah it's really good not a legitimately funny well he's funny to us yeah and i don't think he does anything anymore i think he deleted all of his all of his uh music probably joined the army aspirations he probably i think he shouldn't have given up yeah he's probably pushing around a bunch of kids in in afghanistan or Iraq or... It fits them. It's okay.

Whatever country we're... Whatever poor country we're bullying this time. There's a lot of them right now. I can't remember. So maybe he's in Venezuela or... Whatever dirtbag country we're... Whatever shithole country we're... That's what it was.

That's what it was. I was trying to think of what he said. It was a dirtbag country. No, that's too nice. That's too nice. Man. Africal. Africal.

Africal? Africal. I'm moving to Africa. Did he say that Africa was a shithole? No, he said some places in Africa are shitholes. He talked about African countries being shithole countries and like Haiti and stuff. Yeah, I'm about to go put some food in my mouth. If you want to do that with me. Do you have food?

Uh, I'm gonna order something. Or actually, I'm gonna drive to a little place on the street and get something. What is it? Del Taco. It's gonna give me the runs. No, that's what I need. We don't have any toilet paper. You really gonna eat Del Taco? That's not gonna hit me until

later. Okay. I'm not constipated right now. I trust you, man. I trust you. Okay. Much like I trust our audience to continue listening to this podcast. A lot of faith there, guys.

A lot of faith. Some of you have been around since the very beginning. Round of applause for those people. And some of you have been around since the very beginning. Round of applause for those people. And some of you have been around for merely a few weeks. Or even this is your first episode. And if that's the case, I say welcome, y'all. Welcome to this ever-growing community of incels and little freaks. And chronic masturbators. Chronic masturbators, yeah. Incels, chronic masturbators, and freaks. And Chronic. Chronic Masturbators. Chronic Masturbators, yeah.

And sells Chronic Masturbators and Freaks. The Chronic Masturbators Alliance Guild. C-Mag. Can we make a shirt and sell it on SuperMega's website for that? The Chronic Masturbators Alliance Guild. I don't know how many that would sell just because it's a vulgar shirt. the chronic masturbators alliance I don't know how many that would sell just because it's a vulgar shirt I would like to make

a shirt that's just like it looks like a regular like a guild shirt or like an organization but it's for the chronic masturbators alliance I feel like that's what a lot of fucking incels would wear well the joke's on them because you're taking their money just I should honestly

I'm actually thinking about doing this like for just a just one drop like I'm not starting a line myself but just having a shirt design I actually don't want to give it away cause uh but how about

can you take it out of the podcast tell me when uh but I'll tell you and you can I'm thinking of just having a shirt and seeing how many I can sell. And it's just going to be I'm going to get someone to like I'm going to get someone to draw beautifully. It's just going to be a. What the fuck? Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because you know if you own a home it can be really hard

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