supermegashow - EP 225 - Goodbye 2020!

Episode Date: December 30, 2020

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Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because, you know, if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now, all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience, and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app, answer a few questions, and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish.

Or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly. Which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps. Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I.com. Welcome to the last SuperMegaCast of 2020. That's right. And just in the spirit of 2020 we're recording it from our from our homes respectively we are still in la is still pretty pretty awful right now especially with the

holidays in fact i think it's what like one in nine one in every 95 people in in uh here have it have covid so that's cool yeah really really cool uh really really high rates i i the hospitals are full seven there's 7 000 people in the hospital oh really so they're getting business oh that's great i mean the medical industry is getting some good business but we're doing this at home hopefully the little mom and pop hospitals are are getting good business i hope they're flourishing i'm sure they are yeah we should dude dude if we want to get rich that's what we got to do we should start our own hospital right now a mom and like a mom and pop little little hospital where it's it's kind of like where uh when i think about it i i think back to like Red Dead Redemption 2 time, like that era,

like when the doctors were essentially just, you're going to die. And like, instead of anesthesia, they just make you drink half a bottle of whiskey. Yeah. We should do that with the super megaplex, open our doors and just let COVID patients in. Just, I love to think that there was a time where we were so just out of it in terms of health that it's just like ah just just drink that's all you can do yeah for amputation just drink your sorrows away for the amputations they'd just be like all right just drink this whole bottle of bourbon because that's that's the best we got and bite down on this rag yeah so you don't bite your

tongue off when we're cutting your leg off you don't want to lose both god man we're we're so we're so unlucky how did we not end up in the in that time we would have been we would we would have been studs i know dude we would have come back from the war because not too many people died from like the world wars and stuff we would have come back as heroes you know all we would have had so many sheilas with us oh my god dude fucking if we if we lived during like civil war times we would be such fucking heroes you know every every woman in the town would get a wet pussy for us you mean you're fighting for our right to own slaves? Oh, so brave.

Wow. That's right. See these human beings. You can own those. Well, as long as my side wins. If the other side wins, then looks like it's just post-apocalypse living for the United States of America. And it was.

I love how there's a, you remember Game of Thrones. Yeah. The big popular. No, wait, what's Game of Thrones? The family comedy that came out not too long ago. A heartwarming family comedy. The showrunners of Game of Thrones were going to start a new show a while back this was i can't remember what it was going to be called um but the premise was what if uh

slavery was still around what if the good people lost the civil war and i'm just like is it you know every i think everybody had the same thought of just like, is it, you know, every, I think everybody had the same thought of just like, is that really a show we want to like have, you know, run by, run by two white dorks, you know? And,

but they also got George R.R. Martin to write it. She, I tried to really put myself into the mind of a black person. Okay, George. Is he, he he's he's dying right i mean if by he's dying you mean he's just getting old then yes he's dying but then so are you and so am i um being too good at writing yeah too good at writing i mean the only thing i could say i could see would be like uh his his weight and his health being like a what is it a precondition or whatever yeah pre-existing condition yeah because it's it's not good to be like super unhealthy when you're when you're old but i guess at that point it's like i'm old fuck it i'm writing these books and i'm eating my fucking five guys burgers and fries you know

that's exactly what he's doing it's probably just stuff in his mouth dude uh hold on let me let me light this candle real quick uh everyone to give you some warmth yeah because we're doing both of our acs and uh both our acs are broken this morning i called ryan and the first thing i said was i said i'm fucking freezing my ac is or my heat is not working and he was like yeah same here it's a conspiracy the landlords are purposely turning off our heat even though we pay for it i don't understand it dude but i'm sure that's what's happening dude you know what it is i bet i know what it is does heat run off of your gas i think so but like i still have warm water like the gas is still working uh because yesterday

uh and i i got woken up at like 8 a.m by my landlord calling me which is always a joy uh because i'll talk about my landlord in a minute but uh they came and like replaced the they put like a new gas meter yesterday in the back of my house so i'm guessing that they shut the gas off and didn't turn it back on see i'm wondering if it's something just as simple as that but like at the same time like do you have hot water uh you know what last night i was trying to get the water hot to uh wash my hands and it was not getting hot see now we have different problems see now it's just my uh i guess unit or whatever because i I still have lovely warm water to shower with.

Well, after this podcast. To shower my beautiful skin with. Your loins. Yeah. I'm going to go try after this podcast to take a, I'm going to take a bath because when it's cold in your house,

a nice warm shower slash bath or a shower that you then sit down in and turn into a bath. With a candle. Yeah. You were saying it the other day and I actually, that got me. I was like, you know, it was raining. I'm like, it sounds perfect.

It's raining. Let me take a bath. And it was incredible. Oh my God. Incredible experience that I- It's so good. I would push others to try and enjoy, you know. Who remembers bathss y'all remember

baths with me ma it was uh raining you know we got our first thunderstorm in like years and a legitimate thunderstorm too not like a not like a little wimpy one like it was at least and the there was lightning it was lighting up the night sky. A lot of loud thunder. What I did was, well, you texted me because you came over and hung out and we watched Boogie Nights. And then you went home. Good movie. Really good movie. And then you went home and then you texted me.

You were like, dude, there's a thunderstorm. And I looked at the radar and I was like, oh my God, it's coming. And I just, what I did was I just opened up my window and I turned off all my lights and I just laid in bed and I just watched like it roll in and all the lightning like light up my room and the thunder. And it was the most relaxing shit ever. It was so nice. And then the next day I took a nice bath while it was raining outside.

It was getting dark I lit myself a candle, got in the bath played a little music on my speaker amazing I played the music out of a water bottle I had lying around I wish you could play music out of anything well I bet you

you can turn anything into a speaker it sounds like one of those like nickelodeon infomercials yeah like kids will be standing around just like useless bullshit it's like all you have to do is make sure that you're attached you attach this stick this uh what this bluetooth sticker to any device and it turns into your own personal portable speaker that sounds exactly like some shit they'd sell. It's like just a small little really shitty Bluetooth speaker that has like a sticky thing on it.

You can just stick it to stuff and turn anything into a speaker. I turned mom into a speaker. That's like one of the final jokes. In the commercial, like they slap it on her and she's like, Yeah, dude, fuck fucking yeah but it's the last podcast of 2020 yes that's that's true wrapping up this this hellish year you know and we're gonna throw it behind us hopefully and 2021 will be a better year i i i was telling one of my friends that i think i just might sob when i when i fly and land home again or or anywhere honestly like once i take a trip or

a vacation somewhere i'll be like oh i've been wasting my life like i feel like everyone feels like uh scrooge at the end of a christmas carol probably after covid it's gonna be like whoa whoa life is so amazing yeah ah man i cannot wait to travel too i'm hopefully in 2021 we can travel and hopefully that covid just goes away or it's not gonna go away but gets better i mean dude this whole year just fucking right when it's getting started just the biggest wrench got thrown in it uh i went back and i was watching one of our animal crossing new horizon episodes and in in that first uh recording session was like right when they declared a lockdown uh so it's literally like the day of

do we read the message that comes on and everything yeah we're talking about it and shit so oh shit wait we have the moment things went on lockdown I think we have the I'm pretty sure in an episode like our alarms went off right I remember this

I remember these things wow we got a little bit of history recorded in super mega and animal crossing new horizons which i'm sure we'll in 2021 we'll we'll see some light but we've been bad about it and we've given our reasons why and we don't need to repeat ourselves yeah i i do want to pick it back up i got, I played it so much on my own that I got just it's like i'm so bored like if anyone else wants to play with it say i go to the i don't know a funeral family reunion you name it you know i don't yeah i'm just kind of i'm not as sharing or caring i would say yeah not as willing to share because you know yeah you can you can do the job then you know what what what good is someone else

you know people say it's that famous saying if you want something done right, do it yourself. Exactly. And I think we all know ourselves the best. So we're our own best partners. Exactly. It's the whole thing of like, if you were to clone yourself, would you have sex with yourself? Matthew, would you have sex with your clone? Absolutely.

Yeah. Now, what if he didn't want to? Well, if it was a clone of me, he would want to because I already would like to have sex with a clone of myself. So if I clone myself, I'm assuming- Would you both just be like, do you want to have sex? Except double that voice? Yeah, we'd say it at the same time.

I'll just double that voice in post. And then I'll be like, stop copying me. Oh, and then we have- No, you're copying me.'ll be like stop copying me oh yeah oh and then we have no you're copying me no you're copying me we say it at the same time and then we just then you both shit your pants at the same time and go oh i don't that's here's the thing if i had sex with myself like a clone i don't know if i if i'd want to do the uh the anal stuff no you just see the vaginal stuff i might do the hand stuff the the sucky sucky stuff i don't know about the anal stuff though you know really but it's not but like it would just be your other asshole you maybe yeah your

clone would be feeling it i guess i guess i could i could try that out i wonder if there's any guys out there that just get off like their biggest fantasy is just fucking a clone of themselves so every time they jerk off it's just they're thinking about fucking themselves in the ass american psycho and also i'm sorry i know i know this is tradition at this point but i have to actually i'm surprised by it i have to go take a rancid shit dude i love it it's even when we're like not together it's uh it still holds go take a rancid shit my i love it it's even when we're like not together it's uh it still holds go take a rancid shit my coffee actually just arrived go listen to eat some eat some food dude listen to some music i'll be back okay shit break hello uh matthew yeah baby how you good i just texted Hey. Matthew? Yeah, baby. How you?

Good. I just texted my landlord, and I was like, hey, I don't think they put the gas back on because it's freezing. I just checked my thermostat. It's 59 degrees in my house right now. It's, like, lower 60s. So, like, I can get by just wearing, like, you know, some nice pajama bottoms and a T-shirt and maybe like, oh, I have that.

Oh, dude, I'm going to wear that robe all day. I'm wearing a robe right now. Believe it or not, I'm only wearing a robe. I'm wearing my Santa Claus robe I bought because it's actually pretty warm and like very comfortable. Really? because it's actually pretty warm and like very comfortable really i'm wearing uh i got a pair of just a pair of pants and then no shirt but i got a bathrobe on and then i've wrapped myself in a blanket i stole from carson's room because it's fucking freezing dude well the bath will feel even great sorry for uh burping while you were talking i was oh that's okay man no i was i was

not trying to be rude or anything i just had to you know hey dude you know like shrek says better out than in uh you know if there's no gas here my it's it's good that there's some there no gas no brakes you know no gas no brakes that's his uh that's his brother's channel wildly unsuccessful that guy is so funny was it andrew callahan is that his name i can't i can't i don't know i'm bad with names i feel like he's gonna get like picked up to to be like on like like remember the daily show had that kind of shit oh yeah he'll get picked up by some like like seth myers has a new correspondent out in the field seth myers is i don't know how seth myers became and i don't want to insult the man i just i'm not sure how he got to where he is

because seth myers is so like bland i think and so also not very funny yeah is that rude is that rude to say no and i was just gonna talk like on major networks do maybe i'm out of it do we have anyone who's not like you're atypical like you know you have the jimmies and then you have conan like i don't want to sound like a libcuck here but like legitimately do we have no other perspective in like popular late night television hosts other than like different forms of like the white experience, like the white man? You know, like we have the heavy white man, the tall white man, the jimmies. I thought we had the gay white man. And then I found out James Corden is straight, which was a big shocker to me. He's completely straight. That's yeah. Dude, I thought James Corden is straight, which was a big shocker to me. He's completely straight?

Yeah. Dude, I thought James Corden was gay 100%. He must like dabbling with the boys. Hey, man. If James Corden wanted to dabble with me and my boys, I'd say go ahead, man. If I can be on your show. In the middle of carpool karaoke, he fondles your balls while singing ouch songs. Just gives me a handjob while your balls while singing ouch songs.

Just gives me a handjob while we're just singing ouch songs together in the car. My landlord texted me. He said, they need people inside so they turn on. Otherwise, they left a card. It should be a number on it. So you call them and somebody has to be in. Please call immediately. Okay. See, I don't have a direct contact.

I'll do it after the podcast. I don't have a direct contact with my landlord. I go through someone that deals with stuff. Well, see, that sounds actually pretty nice because my landlord. Shows up to your house randomly. He has to be the most intrusive and like he i i know he's just doing it because he's old and bored like i know he like there's no like ill will or anything there it's just frustrating because i'm pretty sure that there's this like

doctrine in california where it's like uh right to uh it's like right to expected privacy where it's like the landlord is not allowed to just like contact you or something. They have to give you like 24-hour notice, right? Well, he'll randomly come knock on my door at like 7 a.m. angry about something or like – And you're like, I'm sleeping, dude. What's up? He always calls me. Like he'll call me at like 6 50 a.m and it's like i'm coming over it's like i'm not gonna pick up the phone at 6 50 a.m

and uh oh he texted me again he said they tried to get in touch yesterday there was no response they knocked a couple time the door there was no response okay well i wasn't here so does that just mean the gas is just off then it's because he's like remodeling like this little piece of property behind my house and he's had to use my backyard the whole time for like construction stuff and my house is connected to that one through like the gas meter and stuff so they have to keep turning off the water and turning off the gas and etc etc etc it's been a very frustrating process because then it like they start at like 7 a.m so i'll just hear these little hammers outside these

every fucking morning and it's really pissing me off i hear that i hear that um i don't hear hammers but i but i but i feel your situation you know like that one neighbor that decides to fucking start doing his weed whacker at like 7 30 in the morning oh that happens every like well actually it's just monday and tuesdays are big for for gardeners to come visit people it's a good guy it's like it's it's like uh gardeners are the tooth fairy to to other people because like they'll you'll just wake up one morning and your and your lawn is finished a nice a nice crisp used pair of underwear is under your lawn is finished. A nice crisp used pair of underwear is under your lawn, if you check, and are lucky enough.

Oh, dude. I love when they leave that behind. It's like the mint on the pillow. But yeah, I definitely hear all the yard work. I mean, like at the Super Megaplex, you can always hear the leaf blower during the Let's Plays. It's been a bit plays it's been a bit

it's been a bit hasn't it um well you could hear it in the back of our of our church sermon oh that's right that's right that was uh that was very fun to shoot that whole church sermon was was improv from start to finish yeah we just wanted to shoot something fun just sat down and shot for 40 minutes yeah we wanted to shoot like a little sermon. Like a lot of people, I don't know why, I guess, but they, I don't know, what's the best way to, I'm not going to say they built it up too much because that's whatever. That's just how hype works. Some people build themselves up. But it just, I don't know.

We were just having fun. And some people seem to have a problem with that or just kind of like, Oh, this isn't a full length movie with Dwayne, the rock Johnson. And it's like, that's in 2021. Yeah.

We're just, we just decided to have fun and like give y'all a little like church, like little church service for service for Christmas Eve. I got so drunk halfway when Jackson forced the chalice into my mouth and forced me to chug it. Well, I think he was upset with you because he was drinking and then you wanted a drink. And then his mind went, oh, he's trying to steal my drinking thing, eh? I'll show him. Well, he showed me.

Yeah. I got a pleasant drunk and and not only did he show you but him and both of his brothers are showing the american people by putting them at risk for traveling yeah dude january's gonna kind of suck because i'm gonna have to you know all the t Tucker brothers who are my roommates all went and traveled. Yes, this is the roast of the Tucker brothers 2020. Matt and I are just both very disappointed little parents. I just, it's harder for me, like, because I'm trying to i've been texting i'm trying to be like hey can you guys like try to all come home like on the same day at least or like within the same week so i don't have to be out of my own house for an entire month uh because that's gonna be really

inconvenient um yeah and uh it's it's tricky when it's when it's one against three brothers oh of course i mean it the i think uh the oh what's what's it called there's like paternal um maternal fraternal yes it's it's the paternal bond they have yeah um you know it's it's uh we'll see how january goes i'm so excited for january i'm so excited for January. I'm just ready for a new month, a new year. Just, I know that like nothing's really going to be different next month,

but just the fact that it's not 2020 is going to be, oh, so. I'm going to be so happy. Basically just the moment I get to travel again like i said i just want to i just want to see my family i uh you know actually i i i specifically i was like you know what um never mind i'm not i gotta stop i was gonna cut into the tucker brothers a little more i'll give them a break um and put those boys on the back burner

for now we'll come back around we'll come back around uh but yeah i don't know just i know some people like i you know let's play him a small a small little violin here but you know i miss my family i would like to hug my dad and hug my mom and see my grandmother and and uh everyone and my friends in south carolina and i'm excited for when that happens hopefully before half of the year is gone you know yeah i i would like the i i hope that the first half of 2021 can let's just get all this shit out of our system in the first half and then have the second half all free, full of joy and glitter and fun and sparkles and all sorts of shit. You know? I mean, I just.

I want to go back to Japan next year and make more Japan vlogs. Same. I just want to go back. vlogs same i just want to go back and i was watching uh some tiktoks and there's a tiktok of you know how they do those videos where it's like gta in real life where they like does a third person perspective and adds like the footstep sound effects and it kind of tracks as they're walking around like they like it would in a third person video game. It was that, except it was in the streets of Tokyo somewhere. And I just was looking at like the signs and like the food menus out front.

I'm like, I just wanna be somewhere else. I don't wanna be here. I just wanna be there. I wish I could jump through my TikTok screen. They're working on that dude dude that's the next adam sandler movie he finds a remote to give him the power to jump into tiktok he can go inside of tiktok yeah except it's gonna be one of those sequels where it's gonna be the same character from click except they're gonna actually recast it so it's not gonna be adam

sandler it's gonna be like fucking bre like fucking Brendan Fraser or something like that. Nah, dude. Brendan Fraser's blacklisted. I saw a WatchMojo video or whatever one of those fucking channels is about that. I'm talking about. What's that channel? It's like the real reason. No, it's WatchMojo.

No, I think there's one other one. There's another one? It starts with a B. And they're the ones that do like the real reason Brendan Fraser. Hold on. The Real Reason, Brendan Fraser. What's the channel called? It's not Breaker.

It's a... Hey, hey, wait, Ryan. Ryan. Dude. Did you hear that? I did. I did. And I can't wait for the post-processing to pick it up even more.

Looper. And highlight it. That's the channel. Looper. And highlight it. That's the channel. Looper. Yeah. Starts with a B. I love how that happens. Because I'll do the same thing where I'm like, oh, it's this word.

It's on the tip of my tongue. It starts with an R. You mean pool? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I don't know why I was thinking R. Maybe like river. It's another body. Yeah yeah i'm sure it's

another body of water yeah it's so weird man how the how the how the sweet brain works how did okay my like our when you learn something does it just go like it's not like there's empty space like in your brain, like on a computer, the way I think it works is, is, you know, it, it changes the zeros into a, a combination of ones and zeros.

So there's like a bunch of zeros and then it changes some of them. And then that's taking up space. Now, maybe I don't know how that shit works, but like, is your brain the same way? Like when you learn stuff, space now maybe i don't know how that shit works but like is your brain the same way like when you learn stuff it just actually creates like a new little yeah like creates a new pocket

i don't think there's like a limit to how much you can learn i'm sure like as you learn more things your brain will maybe you know put some things off to the side or in the background but i feel like you know there's those people who learn like five different languages and at the same time or history teachers that'll know everything you know there's there's there's all i know is that i if if i wanted to learn a lot more if if there was a finite amount you could learn, then I still have a lot to go. There is a finite amount, but it's the amount of information the brain can store. And it's many trillions of synapses. It's not infinite, but it's large enough that the amount we can learn is not limited by the brain's storage capacity.

Oh, I'm glad you're taking up the the whole uh you know teaching is the best form of learning you know if you can teach someone then you've learned it yeah i and i i wait is it just like it's actually a good form of studying pretend you're a teacher and try to like oh yeah that explains something to someone i learned the best i actually i like explaining stuff like how to do stuff on the computer or stuff in like adobe premiere you also like mansplaining too well i mean that's kind of a given uh i like mansplaining to people because then it it makes me remember it better do you remember when manspreading was a thing i mean i guess it technically still is dude stop manspreading ryan there i'm sure there is a problem with asshole people taking

up a lot of space but i don't think it has much to do with like i'm conquering this bus seat i don't know fuck these women women. Maybe it is. Maybe it is like the reincarnate of Julius Caesar trying to take back the empire of which he lost, you know, but. Oh, remember in the last podcast we were talking about. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because you know if you own a home it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well whether it's in everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality it can be hard just to know where to start. But now

all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience, and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app. Answer a few questions and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish, or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly, which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps, because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I dot com.

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Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca. Please play responsibly. Sorry, that was a weird-ass burp. We were talking about at the bottom of hell who the the three people are i remember it's judas brutus and uh i i didn't realize that rhymes it's judas brutus and uh um oh god did he sound like a monkey's name i couldn't remember i couldn't remember it last time like i remember the other one did chris do something brutus yeah yeah chris chris chris made the i think he made a little

cartoon about brutus the ape okay okay that's such a good name for it was that just something he made on this i can't remember hold up i'm trying to look it up but i remember he was working on that at one okay i don't know if he ever released like or finished a uh like a a full project of it but no i don't think so it was i love uh good old brutus judas brutus and was it okay shoot us and screw this uh cassius okay it was cassius i don't know cassius dude i don't know dude okay i Okay, I'll look him up. What the fuck did Cassius do? Like a Cass...

Oh, I'm thinking of Cassio, like the watch. They named... They got the idea for the watch while they were down in the bottom levels of hell. So they're like, we should name it after, you know, after this guy. Okay, Cassius is the modern shrewd and active member of the conspiracy to assassinate caesar okay oh so so wait i thought that was brutus brutus is the one that that delivers oh actually he did that okay so it's brutus and cassius and then judas is thrown in there well i like how deceit one man deceived the lord you know i mean the other guys just deceive like a political figure and

all of a sudden they're the two biggest figures in hell for some reason like a lot more evil stuff has happened on earth why are they the ones that it's like okay uh they're gonna fill two of the three spots of the most damned I don't understand that it's just that

dude that would have been wild to go back in history and be able to actually witness the Julius Caesar caesar thing how they all like when fucking when i'm fucked him up yeah if i look at like these dude hold up i'm gonna send you a link this is what a julius caesar looked like looked like that link. That's not a virus. That's a. No way, dude. Dude, that's really what he looked like. I mean, I just says Julius Caesar has a crazy bulge.

This is oh, this is from the Daily Mail. OK. Yeah, but I mean, I'm looking at the other renditions. It's not too far off hey man i would have killed him too if he looked like hey your eyes are too close together his it's his eyes are too close his nose is too long like going down his face he has a weak chin and then his forehead is fucking massive he's like a buttock martian there's a lot of free real estate on his forehead yeah and also

let's talk about that hairline oh you know dude that looks so fucking funny i i want to know what looks like i'm looking at harrison tucker that does look like harrison dude doesn't it look like future harrison like put glasses on him honestly put a put a glass of wine in his hand put glasses in a glass of wine and that's harrison at like 40 it is like 100 i'm like picturing it what um i i want to just see like what all these historical figures actually looked like because you know in your in your head the idea of what caesar looks like is this like huge like muscular like beautiful you know man but really oh see i always pictured him as just some just some guy in

a white robe and then brutus went bitch dude napoleon looks like a fucking incel he napoleon honestly like the renditions of him kind of look like uh boris johnson i'm looking at what he actually looked like uh napoleon okay looking at what he actually looked like Napoleon okay looking at what he really looked like and then looking at the paintings of him he really had his shit done up good in the paintings well I mean he had his oh there's this one oh dude hold

up there's like this one picture where he has like long hair I'm sure you can see it in google image he has like long hair he's like a dashing see it in Google Images. He has like long hair. He's like a dashing young man. Yeah, it's the Wikipedia picture. The painting of him. The glow up dude. Yeah.

The many faces of Napoleon Bonaparte. And I'm looking at. Bonaparte, sorry. More like boner fart. Woo. Get him. I'm looking at other pictures of him like where he's kind of fat and balding and sitting on a like a chair. Why do you always have his hand in his in his in his thing uh because it's a just it's just a thing of the

times i think right i guess so like uh i i remember uh thinking it was really cool when when bane had his arms kind of like holding his jacket oh yeah it's just what studs did this is like that it's like that it's like what bane did just in the past and to a lesser extent napoleon and bane are pretty similar hey i i'm looking i lost the war got stranded on I guess he didn't get stranded. Exiled. Yeah. They sent his ass over there. They said, get out of here, Napoleon.

Fucking what kind of name is that? What, like the movie? Napoleon was actually above average height for a man at the time. At five foot six to seven inches. That's like Justin. That's our little napoleon our our sweet little justin is our little napoleon conquering the let's plays he's conquering the let's play realm um at his autopsy napoleon is supposed to have measured five two but many

experts believe that through the metric system was standardized in France differently in the 1790s. It was measured in French, in old French inches, larger than British ones. See, I'm not that short. I'm just, I measure myself in French inches. Whoa, what are you listening to this for? Wait, who's talking? You know you're driving a 2024 Ford Escape

with available Alexa built in, so you can change the music. Oh yeah. Alexa, change station to 99.2. See? Purchase a 2024 Escape ST-Line all-wheel drive with Tech Pack at 3.49% APR for 72 months with down payment. That's just $267 bi-weekly. Cash value of $40,294. Plus, eligible Ford owners get a $1,000 bonus. For details, visit your local Ford store or Ford.ca. Hi, can I take your

order, please? Is that it? a cold drink with extra ice. Junior chicken will be fire and a sweet hot apple pie. Is that it? Let me get a quarter pounder with cheese and flatfish, oh please. Make good as a McMuffin and a large coffee. A hamburger, cheeseburger, hash brown, hotcakes, vanilla, corn shake, and a hot bar on Sunday. Ba-da-ba-ba-ba. Speaking of history, I actually started watching

videos from Weird History. Because I know you watched it right and you're like oh it's a good channel weird history one of those history yeah yeah right it's one of those oh never mind then oh it's a really good channel that uh that just gives some little fun little tidbits you can use like uh they they talked about the famous Indianapolis ship thing incident, you know, where all the dudes got eaten by sharks, essentially, where it's like 800 men went into the water. Only 100 came out. Oh, Harrison loves this channel. I'm looking at it now.

I've seen this channel before. Yeah. Apparently, we didn't say anything about this because it was such a big fuck up because they were like, hey, we sent out an SOS and we didn't show up on time and still no one looked for us while people are just being eaten alive by sharks and shit out here. Wait, what happened? So a ship sank out in the ocean, you know and uh they sent out a distress call uh and they also didn't show up on time like they were supposed to because you know ships have a scheduled you know kind of a scheduled docking thing going on and so a lot of people were just stranded out in the middle of the ocean except a lot of people died due to the sinking like went down with the ship there were 800 people on this. And I think it had something to also do with like the nuclear shit that we

were going to do to Japan, but people were in the water and it was like one of the biggest cases of feeding frenzies in history because people were just going for days just by being eaten alive by sharks and stuff. because people were just going for days just by being eaten alive by sharks and stuff. And the reason why it wasn't really talked about so much at that time, and it was only mentioned afterwards, and this is from that video,

and I suggest y'all watch it because I probably get some shit wrong, was simply because it's like, it makes us look bad and we want to bomb Japan. We want to incinerate human beings and to do that we we don't want people thinking that we fucked up in any way you know with our own people so let's look good and then afterwards i think they blamed some innocent dude who had nothing to do with it we're like it's your fault you're court-martialed but he ended up getting uh

shit like that i know just because some dudes don't want it's like they don't want to take responsibility so it's just like oh oh that's all that's that's on you derrick that's what that's very soviet because in the soviet union you know like how secret well i mean that's also very like modern chinese and stuff too or like anytime uh any modern power yeah honestly yeah just any any modern world power whenever whenever they fuck something up they try they put they downplay it or full flat out deny it like uh most big countries do that now like especially china like china will just uh like when they had the explosion in tianjin in 2015 like they just tried to cover that up and

they were like what nope nothing happened happened. Don't worry about it. I mean, there's the meme, the famous Tiananmen Square. I'm trying to think, there are stuff, there is stuff that the US definitely hides and tries to sugarcoat through history, but is there anything today that you would make the equivalent argument

of Tiananmen Square in America? What would be that? I don't know honestly because I know there's got to be something that because I'm not I'm not the smartest person I'm not well versed in history in general so I'm sure history buffs out there know about something that is seldom known but other people would point it out would be like hey america well i mean you can't really hide slavery um internment camps of japanese civilians during wartime because of the way they looked uh you know you can't really hide that i guess i didn't know uh there's there's like video footage

from tiananmen and uh i saw some of it it's crazy I didn't know that there were video cameras recording and stuff. It's pretty wild. Filming on a reel? Yeah. Tiananmen is fucked up. If you don't know what it is, you guys should go look it up and learn about it. Psych, it didn't happen. All those videos I saw, they staged those on a soundstage.

Also, real quick, going back to Napoleon, I'm looking at a website with facts about him, and Napoleon boasted that power was an aphrodisiac and that he, quotes, takes women and forgets them. Yet, a 2014 Channel 4 documentary suggests that his penis, now owned by a U.S. collector, measured just 1.5 inches long. Erect or soft? I don't know, man.

Because, you know, you can be a grower. You can have a, I'm sure you could have a, like a two centimeter dick, and then it grow like the Grinch heart. You know, it grows three sizes. Your cock could grow, well, then it'd only be three inches. Or, sorry, three centimeters. So it'd still grow a oh dude three centimeters is about an inch and a half i think i wish like a flaccid penis would like be like it grew three times that size i'm like whoa okay dude now i now i have three inches to work with.

Dude, mine goes from about two to about 20. Dude, you know, there's one person out there. I guess it kind of does in a way, but I feel like times three, like when I'm thinking like, like just like, not just in length, but levels up. Yeah, exactly. like in width and height dude i wish like it just fast dude you know you know how i like the the most depressing feeling in the world is when i'm sitting surrounded by like you like empty drink cups and wrappers at my desk and it's dark and i'm i'm just trying to jerk off and i'm just like slapping my dick around just like come on just just get just get up just come

on and then i i look at the screen and what i'm watching i'm just like oh god i feel like a disgusting human being you're like fucking elmer elmer elmer fudd choking Bugs Bunny. Why you waffly little wabbit. Elmer Fudd looks like the Julius Caesar thing you said. Yeah. Like Julius Caesar looks like Elmer Fudd.

So I guess Elmer Fudd can be Jackson then if Harrison's Julius Caesar. Yeah. Now I just need to figure out who Carson is. Carson's like Jacob Sartorius or something. That's the fucking trio right there.

Jacob Sartorius and Julius Caesar. But the version of Julius Caesar with the fucked up looking head. Yes. The one that looks like it's like the same shape is kind of like a uh oh well i can't use this example because it's not known i watched uh for the second time i watched the crocodile hunter movie uh with uh because first i watched

in theaters with my dad and now i watched it with uh justin and Kelly. And what a movie that was. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Some important information gets... A satellite blows up in the beginning and important information beams down to Earth in the form of like a black box and then it gets eaten by an alligator. Is this real?

Like, was this a... This is an actual movie that was from MGM Studios. Starring Steve and Terry? Yeah, starring Steve and Terry and then they have the other characters who are like the agents that are sent to go retrieve

the black box holy shit are you looking at it? I was looking it up but I just stumbled upon something else yes do you remember Tourette's guy? yes I was looking it up, but I just stumbled upon something else. Yes? Do you remember Tourette's guy? Yes.

Early YouTube. He uploaded a new video five days ago. Wait, what? Yeah, dude. I'm going to send it to you. Just put it in the Discord link. What the fuck, dude? You know, man man I'm actually never mind I mean I got to it

faster like I typed it in faster than you could copy and paste a link I was literally I was about to press paste so what's he uh oh it's still like oh shit see like i don't i i i'm almost certain these are fake

ew but i mean it's hard to fake that no that that mess looks fake he's just been gone for three years and he looks the same and just comes out five days did he like is this a video that was accidentally scheduled like this should have been this should have come out like during the new year three years ago or something no the description says 20 years ago today on christmas day in the year 2000 the first tourette's guy video was shared vhs tape featuring a 25 minute video of a day in the life of a unique man named danny um it's like he doesn't actually have tourette's right I don't know but I mean there are people who are who are uh becoming famous uh and I'm not saying Tourette's is the shtick Tourette's is the thing they have but they they have created an audience I think there's a i'm gonna fuck up her name it's like anita or what is it it's a

streamer and there's been a lot of uh yeah anita i was right wow she has tourette's and she has gained a following in the past couple years h3 has tourette's Ethan Clark yeah he has he has a like tit like a physical tit like facial tics yeah it's just like what he does with his eyebrows no he doesn't have the type where he screams out racial slurs and Anita has that she'll be like big cock and I think you know there was one time where the n-word did pop out on stream what is Tourette's dude but like you can't help it so how does like a sneeze but with words how does that happen though like like of dude of all the things to be cursed with it's like yeah you're just gonna randomly scream the n-word in public it's like like what an interesting condition well I get yeah I just don't think you could

ever go out in public if like if the n-word was one of your major tics cause you know tics from what I've heard at least it's different for everyone I you know but tics can come in waves like there's different tics for different stages of your life essentially or

it's just like it's almost it's like you picking up new hobbies except it's just like yeah it's almost it's like you picking up new hobbies except it's just new except it's unintentional and it's well and it's bad words or phrases or noises i think sometimes like the tics can also be like targeted and they they can't even help it like they'll see a black person and start like you know yelling the n-word at them and they're like they can't help it well from their head it's not like they see a black person and say the n-word at them and they're like they can't help it well from their head it's not like they see a black person and say the n-word it's more like they they see a black person and then the thought of i hope i don't say this because i have Tourette's and then that makes it more likely for it to sputter out i'm reading about it suggests that it's caused by damage to the amount uh

amalg i have that's to part of the brain with a funny name. A region of the brain that normally mitigates anger and aggression. Because cursing is a form of verbal aggression. A maudgidala damage could result in the inability to control aggression, including verbal aggression or cursing. Wait, are you trying to say that Sweet Anita is an abusive, verbally, like, just a psychopath? Yep. Mm-hmm. I can't. I think so.

That's it. I'm canceling sweet Anita. Dude, cancel her. For her Tourette's. Cancel your Twitch sub. People have legitimately tried to cancel her before. Hey, fuck you and your condition. No, that's what it is because people don't understand it they're

either i think the biggest thing that people with tourette's that they're accused of is faking it right you know oh you're faking it yeah dude i was screaming the n-word in public as uh just to get attention well i guess that would get you some attention always comes back to the n-word for you well i mean i've i just i've seen i've seen tourette's examples where it's just that or they'll it's more than that sucker it'd be like shut the fuck up fuck you fuck you fuck you sorry about that you know that's so weird not like a bad what kind of weird like it's fascinating i wonder if since it's explained it was explained to me like it was kind of it's like a sneeze can you feel it coming on like you're like oh here it comes and then you blurt it out or do you think it just jumps out of nowhere if it's a tick i'm guessing

it's just out of nowhere you know like with ethan when whenever Ethan Klein, the man, whenever he has his tics, I wonder, does he feel it every time? Does he notice it or is it just something that like he's used to now? He probably doesn't notice it. He probably he probably just like, you know, like that just feels that's just like normal facial movements at this point. You know, it's just like, yeah, you moved your eyebrows like that so many times every day. You don't think about it. I think our boy Ethan has three separate podcasts that he runs. Three?

Wait, he has the H3 podcast. Then he has H3 After Dark. Oh, that's a separate podcast? What is that? I guess it's a separate. I don't know. It's called something different. Might as well.

We need Super mega after dark. And then. Frenemies. And then he has. Yeah. Frenemies. With Trisha. Paitis.

Paitis. Whatever. Yeah. Okay. I've seen. I don't. Like. I've.

I've seen. I've seen. Like. The YouTube thumbnails. Where she leaves the show. Like. Quits. Like.

Fully quits. Like. Three times now. She's done it. Like. Yeah. She's like. I think stormed

off twice from now i think it's because she's been diagnosed i think she has a again this isn't me diagnosing her i if i'm wrong then correct me but i think she was diagnosed and is open about the fact that she has bpd which would make a lot of sense for like her behavior. Uh, let's see. Yeah. Yes. I think so. Wait.

I found a tweet. Yeah. Yeah. She does. She used to hang out with Dolan. So not Dolan. Dolan. David Dobrik. Sorry. You know, Dolan Dark and David Dobrik. Sorry, you know, Dolan Dark and David Dobrik.

They're so similar. I remember I was watching an old Eminem music video and Trisha Paytas was in it. And I was like, what? She's been around for a while. She's been on a bunch of shows. She was on the Ellen show, I think, too. How did she get big like what was she

like what was her initial claim to fame i don't know i feel like she's just always been around she's like that thing in or she's like that constant code in in our uh virtual space, she's like the constant and the ever-changing universe. Yeah. No matter what, you know, what different dimension you'll end up in, there will always be a Trisha Paytas.

No matter which universe you go to. Dude, I want to go to another universe. She got to the point where like so many people are talking about her. She's huge, especially on OnlyFans. Yeah, dude. No, I'm not saying, she's huge, dude. What a fucking dude.

You know, I'm saying she has amassed a very big fan base. She actually got engaged to heal his brother. Yeah, I saw that. I saw that. I saw that. So I think, you know, I think we have to be somewhat supportive, right? Congratulations to the bride and groom. I don't know either of them. I actually, you know, they're complete strangers to me.

All of them are. And, yeah. We've never spoken to Ethan. No, we haven't. I mean, we haven't. I mean, we know people who have been on the H3 podcast and we know people who kind of like, I guess run in that circle, I guess, but it's not.

We don't have a million yet. I think the moment we hit a million, we might show up on eBoys radar. Hell yeah. Dude, that's my goal, man i'd hit a million so you're you're not youtube famous unless you're unless you're noticed by ethan and gila klein that's the thing dude i'm that's the thing from the beginning man i'm trying to i'm trying to get it done you know super mega is not shit until that happens and and what are you doing to make that happen matthew uh um i am dude i don't know put me on the spot

here buddy yeah man uh i i'm gonna i'm gonna put on 12 beanies 12 epic beanies dude since the pandemic started apple apples made 988 billion dollars i get like really hungry in the morning and then i kind of just do shit and get sidetracked and then i just don't eat until like 9 or 10 p.m i don't get hungry in the morning which is something i wish uh i really fucking wish I could get hungry. Because if I could just eat a big breakfast every morning. Oh, boy, that'd be great. But I just I never hungry when I wake up and I don't get hungry until the evening.

Usually like past dinnertime evening, like late night. Maybe it's just like my body is just used to that like eating schedule and I just have to like force it out of it. like my body is just used to that like eating schedule and i just have to like force it out of it yeah you gotta you gotta start giving yourself like a little nibble of something although i have noticed like when i'm getting hungry i'll be like oh let me just eat like a few chips before dinner and i'll eat like 10 chips but then i'm like oh you know what i'm not as hungry as i was before and then i'll just kind of spoil my appetite by eating a few chips yeah i feel that man well i mean aren't appetizers supposed to make you hungrier like just in a little bit i guess supposed to get your like your your engine fired up your stomach going oh okay but then they give

you like this they give you like like a bowl of chili as an appetizer like a big ass like two gallon bowl of chili or like 20 appetizers a big ass like two gallon bowl of chili or like 20 appetizers are fucking huge they'll just be like can i have an appetizer salad and it comes in like the biggest fucking bowl appetizers are not appetizers anymore what have i happened to appetizers no but they really it's like like back in my day at most restaurants now appetizers are just the same size as like a course, like a main dish. So sometimes if I'm not very hungry or whatever, or like sometimes I won't really like what's on a menu at a restaurant, but I'm like, oh, that appetizer looks good. And you know those like, you know, the restaurants that don't let you just get appetizers, like you have to order a meal too.

And I'm like, what the fuck? Let me just buy a product. It's like when I try to order off of the kids menu. Dude, why is, why do they not let you do that i don't know it's still money i guess i'm not a kid i think it's because they're like because it's technically way cheaper so they're like they're cheating the system by ordering off the kids menu yeah there are places you just don't allow you to which is you know how it says not epic like under like you have don't allow you to, which is not epic.

Like under, like you have to be under 12 to order off the kid's menu on a lot of places, I think. I want to see them start carding like 13-year-olds. Like, can I see your ID? You look 13 or 14. Nope. Oh, you're 14. I'm sorry. You can't order off the kid's menu.

You're a big boy now. The kid's menu was my favorite, dude. When I would go to On the Border, remember that restaurant? I do remember. I never went. I never went. I would always see it when we would go on like a yearly vacation to the beach. I'd always drive past it.

And I'd always drive past. Do you know, like if you're going from Columbia to Charleston, maybe, maybe it's not. No, it's not even Charleston. It's somewhere else. But there's that huge fireworks shop with like the dog as the mascot or Dalmatian, maybe. Well, when you're when you're going from like Savannah to Charleston, there's a bunch of fireworks shops on the side of the street. And there's a dude, there's so many fireworks places in the south, like on the side of the highway it'll be like here's my massive usually at a gas station yeah like when like where boiled peanuts are i miss boiled peanuts dude this isn't a funny

bit you know a lot of people when i i guess it's it's a southern thing and also i think they do it in some like i think they do it in taiwan they have boiled peanuts and shit maybe china because last time we said boiled peanuts people thought we were just fucking around and like like gaslighting people into like pretending to like something really like disgusting no boiled peanuts are fucking amazing it's it's it's a to me they are that's all i can say it's a soft peanut that's all tastes good you can chew on the shell and get the juices from it. It's delicious.

Wow. I just got on Twitter, and the first thing I saw was a Max Mofo tweet with him selling his big nut shirt, which is shaped like a peanut, as I'm talking about this. Ooh. Go, Max. Yeah. Go. I hope Max and Chad are doing well. It would be nice to visit Australia again to see those boys dude after the pandemic after the pandemic i've been thinking lately just like

kind of how bad just one day like not anytime soon but just in the future i would just love to move to australia for a while i don't know if i could if i could move there but i would definitely like to spend a good amount of time. Like I could spend a month there of like going to the Australian zoo, going to the Outback, going to the cities, maybe a little over a month. I could, I could probably do it like a year or two.

I would love to live around a bunch of different places just for like a year. I'd love to live. Be a very traveled, be like one of those, uh, girls with the big sunglasses and big hats on instagram and then you can put and you can put on your resume well traveled or some shit like that

my favorite thing about those girls is like yes they've been to those places but they'll post like a picture of themselves at like a two hundred thousand dollar like a week resort and one of those countries and it's like yeah did you really go to that country though you just went to a really fucking nice resort in that country but did you actually see any of the country did you like see any of the people and ordered the best

pizza to my room it's official Italian pizza I've had Italian pizza stop I want to go to Italy I've had Italian pizza. Stop. I want to go to Italy. I've always wanted to go to Italy.

I want to go to... Europe's a big thing for me. I've never been to any European country. So I would like to go. Yeah, I haven't been to... We'll have to do Super Mega Does Europe and just do all the different countries. We can go see Dawn while we're over there. Ooh.

We got a bunch of friends over there. Super Mega Does zealand and we can have a big snowboarding trip oh skiing and snowboarding trip ryan learns how to snowboard and we could go to the uh shire because that is true um i'm not that big of a lord of the ring stan i haven't seen them well i've seen. Well, I've seen the third one. Dude, yes. Because for those who don't know, Matt lost an odds are where he had to watch three movies

in a row of my choosing and I chose Laquisha, right? Yeah. Well, that was one of them. You chose the Christian abortion one followed by, you put it in the middle. You put the third Lord of the Rings,

which is three hours. Was it Laetitia or Loquisha? Loquisha. Loquisha, okay. Great. And then Lord of the Rings, the third one, the very last one. No, I think Lord of the Rings was the second one.

You put it in the middle. And then Loquisha was last. Okay. I remember I- No, I meant like it was the last Lord of the Rings. Oh, yeah. That I gave you. And I hadn't seen any of the other ones,

so I have no clue what's going on. And I'm sure going on and i'm sure there are a few people upset with me is like i can't ryan as much as you love movies you spoiled the lord of the rings thing for matt i'm like i don't know no you didn't because i don't remember a single thing about it you don't remember a single thing you were confused and i also i think much like me i mean i do i did like game of thrones maybe you know i have a bit of a weakness on my side but at the same time i'm not that invested I also, I think much like me, I mean, I do, I did like Game of Thrones. Maybe, you know, I have a bit of a weakness on my side. But at the same time, I'm not that invested in medieval stuff. I can never take it too seriously unless it does a good job like Game of Thrones or something in the beginning.

Like whenever it's something medieval, I'm like, all right, I'm the king. Okay, Jester, you're going to put on your medieval garb and we're going to put on these accents. It always just seems like a renaissance fare to me unless they do it well. The favorite did a pretty good job, I thought. Oh, the favorite was beautiful in terms of like costume design and everything, like set design, like that works. But I guess I'm talking about the movies where you can tell it's like when i watch something medieval i want it to look dirty you know i want i want it to look like it

would in that time i don't want it to be like bright and colorful i think braveheart did a job braveheart made it kind of muddy and dirty i mean say like when i watch monty python and i see like it's like medieval and it's all like muddy gross yeah i'm like oh why that's what it's supposed to be i know it's miserable it's dark and depressing there's people dying on the streets people throw away like throw their poop out of their second story windows onto like the streets and poor neighborhoods being just like you know you can't choose when you're born we got lucky and we got to grow up and witness like the biggest technological boom in human history but imagine just like yeah i was born in the dark ages fuck just nothing like well you

wouldn't know you wouldn't know i know i know but just that would suck in retrospective yes it would it would see ryan it's sick because you know know, you and I, we were born in America. We have an advantage over the entire rest of the world. We were born in America. We're just better than everyone else. Can you imagine if we were born in, like, China or Russia, bro? Yeah, dude, I can't even imagine that because it would suck so many balls. All those fucking losers.

Oh, my God. And speaking of losers, you're about to lose this podcast. Say goodbye, Matt. Bye. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs, projects done well. I absolutely love this, because you know if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream

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