supermegashow - EP 236 - Special Guest: Michael Jackson

Episode Date: March 17, 2021

We have the King of Pop here in the flesh! Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code SUPERMEGA20 at Manscaped.com Ritual is offering my listeners 10% off during your first 3 months. Visit ritual....com/SUPERMEGA to start your Ritual today.  Babbel.com, code SUPER, for an extra 3 months free. Babbel—Language for life. Amazon Prime Members can save on prescription medication when not using insurance and get FREE 2-Day delivery! Learn more at Amazon.com/SUPER. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because, you know, if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now, all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience, and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app, answer a few questions, and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish.
Starting point is 00:00:47 Or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly. Which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps. Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I.com. Hi, can I a happy man, I make crispy and tan McNuggets. Tasty golden fries, a cold drink with extra ice. Junior chicken will be fire and a sweet hot apple pie. Is that it? Let me get a quarter pounder with cheese, a flat fish show, please.
Starting point is 00:01:34 Make good as a McMuffin and a large coffee. A hamburger, cheeseburger, hodgepodge, hotcakes. Vanilla cone shake and a hot bar sundae. Ba-da-ba-ba-ba. Hey, I'm back from surgery. And I'm here. Just normal as always. Are you trying to be me?
Starting point is 00:01:53 No. Well, you know what? No, I'm not. Fuck. Well, I don't sound like that anymore, dude. Ah! Ah, Patrick! Hey, guys, I'm back from my nose surgery.
Starting point is 00:02:04 They pulled the tubes out of my nose and I still I got a lot of recovering it's all swollen and shit but uh hey my voice is back to normal um I feel like in my head it sounds a little bit different it sounds like um like more like like that
Starting point is 00:02:20 I don't know if that even makes sense it's hard to tell in the podcast room because like if your voice sounds crisper because it always just sounds more crisp because of the sound foam and stuff. I feel like it does sound a bit different even if it is just like healing. I have more airflow. But we forgot to introduce our guest. Please introduce yourself. Michael Jackson. Thanks, Michael.
Starting point is 00:02:44 What's up, guys? Episode 236 I'm sleeping in a sleeping bag on the floor none of that I gave him the bed cause he has a brother named Star we'll get into that took a little time off
Starting point is 00:02:56 cause my nose was all fucked and goofy now it's wonderful in terms of air flow listen to this remember when I showed on the podcast Well, it still is. It's still, you know. Now it's wonderful. Well, in terms of airflow. Yeah. Yeah. I can listen to this. Ready?
Starting point is 00:03:07 Ready? Remember when I showed on the podcast me breathing through one side of my nose and it was all like, fucked? Yeah. Listen, here's both sides at the same time. That's a big old whiff. Might have to change the sound effect later on in the end screen to have a more healthy sniff. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:24 Like a, instead of a it feels great though man it was uh it hurt um one thing i i wanted to say uh kind of a funny story i guess um well after i got out of the surgery and i was in the recovery room i just woken up from the anesthesia and the nurse comes in and she's you know helping me you know sitting me up and stuff and helping me and i'm regaining consciousness a little bit uh and then she's like okay i'll leave to let you get changed back into your clothes so i just i get off and i start you know i take off my robe or my gown my king's robe they put me in um it was gucci and then i i take it off and i i'm in my underwear and she comes
Starting point is 00:04:05 back in real quick and she's like hey oh oh sorry sorry and i was i was like i was like no no it's it's fine you can say what you need to say real quick and that was my underwear so it's a little awkward but i was sitting on the table and like you know i'm like okay i'm in my boxers but like it's it's all good uh and she talked for uh like 20 seconds then left and i looked down and realized that the head of my penis was out of my boxers the entire time. So. You just sexually harassed someone. Yeah, because when she came in to talk, I was like, no, no, it's okay.
Starting point is 00:04:33 Because she was like, oh, it doesn't. I was like, no. She probably obviously saw the head of your penis. I really hope. Well, my underwear was black. So I think that kind of. And she was like. It wasn't the full head.
Starting point is 00:04:42 It was like. No, no. Say what you need to say. Yeah. What if she thinks it's... Doctor, I was... I can promise you she's not listening to the podcast, so... Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:54 I just hit myself in the nose. It's very... They did... All this is new cartilage at the bottom. You know, got a brand new cartilage. They said the worst thing that you could do would be to be punched in the face. Yeah. Which I would not ever.
Starting point is 00:05:06 I would never hurt a child. Yeah, no. People just don't. As long as you don't deck me square in the face, we're good. Yeah. If I got hit with a ball, or he said if something falls from the cupboard, worst thing that could happen. You would break all this brand new cartilage.
Starting point is 00:05:22 But when they pulled the tubes out, the procedure I got done today was fantastic. I go in, he's like, Matthew, how are you feeling? He speaks really fast. I was like, good, good. And he sprays lidocaine up my nose, like liquid, and it goes all the way back to down my throat. And I was like, and then he gets some pliers,
Starting point is 00:05:41 pulls the fucking huge tubes out of my nose. There's like a bunch of like snot and coagulated blood. It was so satisfying though. It kind of hurt, but it was so good. And then he put a vacuum on my nose. It was like sucked everything out and he sucked, he licked the tip of it when he was done. I don't think he's, yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:05:58 Yeah. Did something happen? No, no. I was hearing like a tapping sound out of my left ear. Is it just the washer? No, it was like a little like, I was seeing like a tapping sound out of my left ear. Is it just the washer? No, it was like a little like, and I was seeing if it was the mixer. It could be like a giant spot. No, actually, it's in my ear, I just realized. It's like a... You have to get the surgery in your ear now?
Starting point is 00:06:15 It's in my ear, yeah. Oh, it's, wow. It's in my, I think it's just because of the mucus and stuff. You know, all connected. ENT, ear, nose, throat. And when I'm talking, I'm feeling a crackle, so. It's a... And I just started getting getting pollen allergies it's that time of year so hey but now you have a beautiful new nose now i can have those allergies with yeah i can react even harder to pollen exactly see before
Starting point is 00:06:37 this was kind of protecting me but now it's um now it's opening it up for everything you know now it's opening it up for everything you know what what's that mean i don't know i was i was just i was just agreeing i guess yeah man i mean i don't have allergies so would you have a good weekend i guess uh yes i did i sunday was the start of it and And I did another one early Monday morning and then early Tuesday morning. I did the motorcycle training course or whatever, where it's like you can get a certification. You can tell the big boys in blue, hey, I can ride this hog. Yeah. Well, it's not a permit or a license, but it gets me like 15% off at some motorcycle gear stores.
Starting point is 00:07:27 It will help take money off insurance for when I actually get the bike. And then oh yeah, when I go to the DMV, it waives the need to take the driver's test. All they would have to do was take the knowledge test
Starting point is 00:07:44 and then I would get the license. Tucker just took that test. He passed. Yeah, with flying colors. I don't think I showed you, but it rained the first day of the motorcycle actually going out into the field. Oh yeah, it was wet. So it soaked through my pants and I could feel every drop running
Starting point is 00:08:00 down my leg and it soaked through my gloves. Like the two days it rains in LA. And let me show you, when I took off my gloves, this is what my fingers look like, my little fingies. I bet I already know, man. Let me see that. Oh!
Starting point is 00:08:15 I hate pruney fingers, man. No, look at the color. Whoa, they're like purple. Yeah, it's like... Were your gloves tight? Super purple. No, that's from the cult. Oh, shit. Almost got some frostbite there, dude. It was the were your gloves tight super purple no that's from the cult oh shit almost got some frostbite there dude it was where your glove basically there's like a stripe of purple
Starting point is 00:08:31 like that does one half of like most of my fingers on my right hand and then my left hand had the same cold it really just turned to that purple yeah that's wild man i i it was it was it was wet this weekend it was rainy man and it's probably the most uncomfortable I've been in a long time. I love the one time you have to go do an outdoor motorcycle class. Let's get it really cold and pouring rain in Los Angeles, of all places. We were all just...
Starting point is 00:08:55 Hey, but I'm sure your adrenaline was high, so you could really pass that course of flying colors. Oh, yeah. Sometimes I would slap my hands straight on the engine to warm it up. Yeah. Never do... flying colors oh yeah you know sometimes i would slap my hands straight on the uh the engine oh to warm it up yeah never do no just if of course did not do that life hack if you're riding a motorcycle and you want to warm your hands up just lay it against the engine and warm it right up real fast but yeah and then your weekend involved mostly recovering you You know, just turning my swag on, hopping up out the bed.
Starting point is 00:09:28 I didn't. I stayed. I stayed on my, I just cleaned my room. Watch any movies? Binge any shows besides the finale of The Bachelor? I watched South Park a bunch. That's right. I watched South Park.
Starting point is 00:09:39 I need to watch that special you recommend. It's very funny. The QAnon vaccine special. Very good. South Park still got it, baby. I'll go through bouts where every few years I'll like watch a season you recommend. It's very funny. The QAnon vaccine special. Very good. South Park still got it, baby. I'll go through bouts where every few years I'll like watch a season or something. Same. Like I don't watch South Park often, but every now and then I'll just sit down and watch
Starting point is 00:09:52 like six episodes. That's funny. I missed so much. I missed like the entire arc of the PC principal and Mr. Garrison. I saw that like a year after it aired, I think. I saw one episode the night it aired which was the one where Kim Jong-un was sending missiles over South Park.
Starting point is 00:10:09 Over like Tweek's house. And I saw that at Ross' house. It was pretty funny. I remember when they were doing the Clinton and Trump like presidential whole thing. I didn't watch any of that. Where Mr. Garrison is Trump. He's like the Trump figure. Well I don't want to spoil anything but Mr. Garrison's back. As Trump? Trump figure. Well, I don't want to spoil anything, but Mr. Garrison's back.
Starting point is 00:10:26 As Trump? No, as himself again, as the teacher. They brought him back finally. Good. During the special. He's like, I'm back. It's Mr. Mackey, dude. Oh, yeah, that's right.
Starting point is 00:10:37 Oh, my God, I just got it. What? Mackey. M'kay. M'kay. M'kay. Mackey. Like M'kay.
Starting point is 00:10:43 Shit. I never, oh Oh that's good Matt Stone and Trey Parker You little devils This one was Mr. Garrison Who am I I was thinking of Mr. Mackie Mr. Garrison's the one
Starting point is 00:10:52 With the square glasses And he's bald Okay yeah yeah yeah And he has a green shirt on Okay yeah yeah He's Mr. Garrison's my favorite character There's the whole
Starting point is 00:11:00 I grew up with Mr. Garrison Then Mrs. Garrison And then Mr. Garrison Yeah And then he was president Yes And now it's Mr. Garrison then Mrs. Garrison and then Mr. Garrison and then he was president and now it's Mr. Garrison again Garrison for some reason I thought that he also did MK
Starting point is 00:11:12 but he was just the one where in the game you go up his ass and you see a bunch of like condoms and shit and like dildos yeah cause he had Mr. Slave in the earlier seasons I think Mr. Slave is in his ass in the game he hasn't been around so now he had Mr. Slave in the earlier seasons I think Mr. Slave is in his ass in the game yeah
Starting point is 00:11:25 don't quote me on that he hasn't been around so now he has Mr. Service who's like a secret service guy that wears like a little like thong oh because I guess he was like an ex-president
Starting point is 00:11:35 so now he has Mr. Service Mr. Service that's great man I love South Park Mr. Sir dude I need to rewatch that documentary The Six Days Out huh?
Starting point is 00:11:46 I need to rewatch that that documentary The Six Days Out. Huh? I need to re-watch that documentary about South Park. Do it. The seven days to air that one? Yeah, yeah. That's really good. Like, that's just... It's the first time I was like, Bill Hader worked on South Park for a little bit? I haven't watched that in a while. He did voices and was in the
Starting point is 00:12:01 writing room for a bit, too. Damn, dude. I know. One thing about The Simpsons I like. I like a lot about The Simpsons. Is that they're yellow? Well, I do like because they're yellow. It's fun for my brain. It gives the dopamine juices flowing.
Starting point is 00:12:15 But when they have a celebrity, they almost always get the real celebrity on. Did they ever have you on? Yes. Oh, cool. Yeah, that's right. You were in that one episode with Bubbles. You were also in South Park, by the way.? Yes. Oh, cool. Yeah, that's right. You were in that one episode with Bubbles. You're also in South Park, by the way. Totally false.
Starting point is 00:12:29 Cool, man. Nice. Ooh, someone's about to get pinched. I don't have any green. Someone's not wearing green in today's St. Patrick's Day. I know. I know. I'm a bastard.
Starting point is 00:12:39 I'm a rat bastard. I'll save it for after the podcast. The thing is, I have Irish blood in me. I know, and I don't, so it's funny that I'm pinching you. You're wearing your Peter Griffin pants. Well, actually, I was wearing Adidas track pants earlier, and I was about to leave the office, and Jackson came up and pinched me. You know that grin, that Jackson face?
Starting point is 00:13:02 And I was like, okay, shit, I better go put some green on because I don't want to deal with this all day so I put some green on and uh it's good luck man it's gotta be we're surrounded by green
Starting point is 00:13:12 yeah man I got some green in my lungs I told Jackson when he pestered me I was like oh I do have green it's in my wallet that's good right
Starting point is 00:13:19 that is good and I saw two people get pulled over today separately really yeah one in Burbank and one in Central City okay I saw two people get pulled over today. Separately? Yeah. One in Burbank and one in Central City.
Starting point is 00:13:27 I rarely see people being pulled over on the highway. Every now and then I will. Rarely do I see it. But like, usually it'll be within the Burbank or Glendale, just around busy kind of like more congested areas. It was a bike officer.
Starting point is 00:13:44 Dude. Dude. Dude, I can drive. I can ride up alongside and be like, hey, I got a... Was that you getting hit by a car wall? That was me running
Starting point is 00:13:54 into like a parked car, I'd imagine, while trying to show off my new bike to a cop. I did that once, dude. I was not on a motorcycle. I was riding a bicycle really fast.
Starting point is 00:14:04 My friend, I was looking over and talking to him and I just slammed into someone's mirror on the side of their car. It like strung me off the bike and I just hit the ground. It's not even that hurt. I'm sure it took the wind out of him. Yeah, it's more that it's shocking. Getting hit in the face, it's not even that hurts. That's so shocking.
Starting point is 00:14:20 Like your whole brain shuts down for a second. I remember going down like a really steep hill as a kid. And I think I still have, yeah, right here. See that scar? I think I've talked about this before. It's like a little bit shiny right there. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:33 Yeah. So I was going down a very steep hill. A car was backing out of its driveway. And I slammed on those front brakes. Not the rear at all. Oh. So I just flipped right over and I became like a,
Starting point is 00:14:47 a little bit of my arm became a tiny bit of like a, I could see the skin and stuff on the street and I was like, ugh. You're a meat crown. Yeah,
Starting point is 00:14:54 I just held my arm and ran up to the house. Like, I hated looking at injuries when I was a kid. I can't, when I get a shot, I can't watch it.
Starting point is 00:15:02 Like, I'm fine with needles, but I can't, I, well, I watched it, when they did the IV, I watched it. I made myself, I'm fine with needles. I find it interesting. I can't, I, well, I watched it, when they did the IV, I watched it. I made myself, I was like, you can do it, you can do it. But, like, when I get a shot, I don't like watching it. It makes me, I feel like it hurts more for some reason.
Starting point is 00:15:13 Like, it's like a mental thing. I try to picture how, like, I'm like, how much of this needle is going inside of me? They stick, they stick, like, the IV shit goes pretty deep. Yeah. But it's not straight. It's usually, it's a thicker needle than, like, if you get pretty deep. Yeah. But it's not straight. It's a thicker needle than if you get injected with AIDS. You know what actually hurt really bad?
Starting point is 00:15:34 Remember when the government administered AIDS? Yeah, I remember. Kanye does too. They made me make a fist so they could see the vein in my hand. And the guy's like, all right. Started slapping the back of my hand. And he kept doing it harder. And I'm going to be honest.
Starting point is 00:15:46 He spit on his hand and started going in circles. Feel anything yet? I'm looking for that vein. Come on, just tell me when I hit the spot. Oh, right there. Oh, nope. I don't think it's real. No, it's more circular motions.
Starting point is 00:15:58 You're just flicking it around. Keep the rhythm up, doc. It actually hurt really bad. It hurt worse than anything from the surgery was him slapping the back of my hand. I see why teachers did that. Like, hold your hand out. You got a ruler? My dad always got beat in school.
Starting point is 00:16:09 Good. Kind of explains some things, you know. Well, maybe he wasn't beat enough. I honestly don't think he was whipped enough. My dad would get sent to the principal's office and they would have the paddle with the holes in it. Did they spank him? Do you think spank
Starting point is 00:16:26 spanking as like a sexual fetish will be on the decline now that parents aren't spanking their kids as much i don't know because i feel like that might that might have some some freudian roots in in being spanked as a child you know maybe i guess potentially but i don't think there'll ever be a shortage of shitty abusive parents would would you you wouldn't spent you wouldn't spank your child would you before i would hurt a child i would slip my wrist i would never hurt a child good good i know you wouldn't um you know but that was that's my that's my that's my annual surgery story. Now, later in the year, we've got to wait for... Your feet are next, right? Yeah, but I'm going to wait for that.
Starting point is 00:17:10 Because it's such an intense recovery, and I can only get one foot done at a time. That's going to be probably the most miserable one. I can still record. I couldn't record with this because my arm wasn't like... It hurts to talk. I heard Matt 1.0 just a second ago.
Starting point is 00:17:27 It's Matt from every other episode of Super Mega Chance. I'll still be able to record with I'll still be able to record with my feet being all goofed. You'll record with your feet? I'll just be heavily drugged up on Vicodin
Starting point is 00:17:44 You'll be heavenly drugged up. Yeah, I will. It'll be like David after Dennis every Let's Play. Dude, Tosh.0. Is he still doing it? Yeah, it's not canceled. Oh my God. He's still going.
Starting point is 00:17:56 No, he's not. Yes, he is. No fucking way. Is Tosh.0 canceled? I have this reaction. I probably had the same reaction half a year to a year ago. I feel like there's like three different types of the podcast. We're like, no way.
Starting point is 00:18:10 No, I can't. It's like. No. It ended November. November 24th, 2020 was the final date. Okay. Okay. So it's actually done now.
Starting point is 00:18:19 Thank God. How about ridiculousness? Is that over? I feel like ridiculousness is not happening. I don't know. Our friend got paid $900 for them to use his clip. Why don't they use any of our clips? Nope.
Starting point is 00:18:34 No final episode dates. I guess Rob's still... That means Ridiculousness won. How far back... When did it first air? August 29th, 2011. God damn. When did...
Starting point is 00:18:44 Okay. Then tell me when Rob and Big first aired Was that like when I was in middle school? Rob and, yeah No, I think earlier than that. Was that like just freshman year? No. That was 2006 to 2008 Holy. So 2006 I would still be in elementary school. I was definitely in elementary
Starting point is 00:19:00 school. I was going into middle school I think. No? I was about to go into middle school. Or maybe I was in early middle school, I think. No, I was about to go into middle school or maybe I was in early middle school. I don't know. I don't fucking know. I don't care. I remember the first time we were talking about school do for me. I'm kidding. It did a lot. I had a dream last night. We were going back to college and we looked at our schedules. Uh, no, I was going back to college and you were going to just going to keep doing all this. And I was like, Oh, I'm going to keep doing super mega too. And then I looked at my schedule and it was like 12-hour days of nonstop classes.
Starting point is 00:19:28 And I was like, how am I going to be able to balance this with Super Mega? So I just withdrew. Taking that class was kind of like going back for like three days because I had to wake up early and then I had to take a test, a 50-question bubble-in test. It's weird as an adult taking tests. I know. This is like school, but not as strict or more strict.
Starting point is 00:19:47 It's just weird as an adult being tested by another adult. Yeah. Because like as a kid, it was like these people are, I don't know. You, you have that whole mentality when you're a kid of these people are bigger and older and wiser than me.
Starting point is 00:20:01 And the thing is these instructors of course do know a lot more than I do, but it's just definitely is something that I'm not used to doing. Like, questionnaires, yes, but not like tests. I haven't felt like that school exam vibe, because everyone just had their paper and was bubbling in their answer. The PACT test
Starting point is 00:20:19 before it became the PASS test? I get to take another test soon. Not the same vibe, though. It's the DMV. Is that like an STD? It's Department of Motor Vehicles. Gotcha. I hate the DMV, man.
Starting point is 00:20:33 So how about this DMV line, right, guys? So I was waiting at the DMV. Okay, Springer. That's like the perfect way to start a stand-up line to get adults to laugh because it's relatable. Your kids won't get it yet, but go yeah so i so i was waiting in the dang dmv line and and the woman's going so slow laughter everywhere so what are what are obnoxious like long so dmvs one a pat getting a passport it can also be a very big hassle post office
Starting point is 00:21:01 post office post office is probably the least out of those that I'm like. Well, it depends on sometimes when you go to the post office, it can be just packed. You'll have like one person that's trying to like argue with the clerk over like a stamp price for like 20 minutes. Holds everything up. Oh, the bank is one. The bank. Oh, I think recently I waited in line at the bank for like an hour because they stand you outside and they split you like six feet apart. And they only allow a certain amount of people in at a time.
Starting point is 00:21:30 Well, you had to wait because they had to back up the truck to get all the money into it. Yes. Yes. That was a big load. Just keeping that in your bedroom now? Yeah. I mean, don't worry. It's all the Patreon money and it's all just like I'm not spending.
Starting point is 00:21:44 I let Ryan manage it, I'm not spending. I'm letting, I let Ryan manage it. I'm not spending most of it. Yeah. Honestly, man, as long as we got, we got something to pay taxes to give to Uncle Sam and we got enough to maybe go out to dinner every now and then. Yeah. That's fine. My whole idea was if I'm going to get a bike, why stop at one when I can get different styles
Starting point is 00:22:00 all at once just to test them out. Be like Jay Leno. And then I won't sell the other ones that I bought. I'll just keep them and I'll just kind of have them. Not a bad plan at all, man. Yeah. I did that with the Teslas. So far I have like about four or five bikes coming in. Mmm. Okay.
Starting point is 00:22:16 Got any vintage ones? Because those can jack up the bill. Yeah, well I got one specifically made by Keanu Reeves company. Okay. He does some custom stuff, which is pretty cool. Well, like I said, as long as there's still some cash for the taxes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm sure. I don't, I let you magic.
Starting point is 00:22:32 It's also business expenses. So they're write-offs for taxes. More like a write-off. Yeah, dude. I don't, I don't need any Patreon money because I made so much money off of Ouch. You know, I'm waiting for someone to... A post to be created. So what's this about Ryan spending upwards of thousands of dollars
Starting point is 00:22:54 on four to five motorcycles of strictly Patreon money that they had loaded into a truck? So they go to the bank and they get all their cash loaded into a truck and Ryan keeps it in his bedroom? Yeah, you can't trust a bank. They've been known to fail. They have been known to fail. What happens when the banks fail?
Starting point is 00:23:17 I mean... You're fucked. You're fucked, but not the bank owners. No, they're like, we'll just take the money. Well, because the money doesn't go. It's not gone. It's just someone else has it now but you know fdic fdic that's uh they they put that in place to assure every person a bank assures you up to like two hundred thousand dollars okay three hundred thousand you know chump change for us but um yeah man pennies in the well pennies in the well cause it really is
Starting point is 00:23:46 the banks are a well to us a shallow little well you know alright I've never taken a coin out of a well cause that's bad luck I'm gonna start doing a piggy bank again like I wanna get like a classic looking piggy bank but you have to smash with a hammer
Starting point is 00:24:00 like legit I think that you know I have I don't really pay in cash as much anymore. I don't have coins that often. But I do get coins every now and then when, like, let's say I go to the dispensary that's cash only or something. Yeah. Actually, there's one I go to that takes card. But it's like a workaround.
Starting point is 00:24:22 Okay. Where they, like, charge your card, and they pay it into the register with cash and then you get a refund. I don't know. I don't know why, because it's not federally, marijuana is not federally legal. So you still can't pay with card,
Starting point is 00:24:34 only cash. I don't know what the deal is with that. Why don't they just do a Supreme Court ruling where it's like, they write it off as like a service fee instead of you paying for the actual products. I don't know. I don't know what they do.
Starting point is 00:24:46 I don't get why marijuana is still legal in so many states. Legal or illegal? Oh, illegal. Yeah. Well, I mean, where was it where shrooms were legalized? Colorado and Portland. Like Oregon decriminalized all drugs and uh shrooms have been granted a uh by the fda like a breakthrough uh research status for therapy so same with mdma so good good that's
Starting point is 00:25:13 pretty cool no i did a lot of research on on uh psilocybin therapy it's really a cool thing and i think that people should support it joe roan supports it. That does not surprise me. Well, I get all my views from Joe Rogan on what to support, what not to support. I just have a little checklist in my pocket. So psilocybin therapy, cross that one off. Joe Rogan fan, you also have crossed that one off. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:25:40 Sometimes I hear you listening to him like on your speakers, like before you get into work, like I'm like inside in the office. Is that loud? And I hear you listening to them, like, on your speakers, like, before you get into work. Like, I'm, like, inside in the office. Is that loud? And I hear you just... 100%. 100%. You know, I hear...
Starting point is 00:25:51 It's the subwoofers. I got the big subwoofers, and I had them modified to look like his big bald head. So it's like the audio's coming out of it. And instead of putting them in the car, I put them on the back of the car. I picture him being short. Is he short? Honestly, I could see him... He's beefy. I could see him being kind of tall i could see him being five seven he's five seven yeah that's three inches taller than justin damn all right that's that's pretty short damn five seven dude i just i searched joe and google autofills joe biden in the subtexas Damn, 5'7"? Dude, I just, I searched Joe,
Starting point is 00:26:26 and Google autofills Joe Biden and the subtext is 46th U.S. President and under it, Joe Rogan, American comedian. But my brain mixed them up for a second, so I saw Joe Rogan, 46th U.S. President. President Rogan announced today. Dude, his wife is Jessica Ditzel. What a ditz.
Starting point is 00:26:43 Is ditz a bad word? Can I say ditz? Dude, his wife's tall. No, she's just wearing heels, I guess. He could wear heels and increase his height by a couple inches. Oh, wait a second, dude. Is she famous? My Amazon machine is buzzing.
Starting point is 00:26:57 Hold on. It's Daddy Jeff. He says we have to chill ourselves out for corporations. Oh, okay. Well, we got to listen to Jeff. All right, so we're going gonna take a quick break for sponsors Okay, do you guys want anything from the kitchen? I'm gonna go get a Gatorade
Starting point is 00:27:10 You want anything, Michael? Hot milk, you know, we have cookies I don't think we have that I mean, we have milk, I can microwave some for you If that works Yes Angie has made it easier than ever To connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs
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Starting point is 00:28:52 And I didn't sleep in the bed with the child. Even if I did, it's okay. I slept on the floor. Okay, yeah. Michael, I'm going to cut you off there. We got to get back to the podcast. And Ryan, that's a stinky one. Oh, I'm sorry about
Starting point is 00:29:05 passing that gas during the ad break i know kind of filled the room and it stunk so bad i mean michael that's something we pretty much every every podcast you gotta i've dealt with it 236 episodes so yeah it did it did anyway Daddy Bezos, cut the leash. Let us go run. Let's go snip snip. Thank you. Thank you. So now we can.
Starting point is 00:29:31 And you turn the collars off. Good. Good. Good. Well, he said, Jeff said he did that one time. We started talking about it on Amazon. Yeah. I think it knows.
Starting point is 00:29:42 I think he added retractable blades in mine. I felt like a little rat. Like, do you see this mark right here? Ooh, that's red. Yeah, it's a little red. Ow. It's whatever. Jeez, man.
Starting point is 00:29:51 The money's good, though. No, the money's great, man. I mean, I'll suck Jeff Bezos' dick for a little bit of money. I could say that, right? I think so. No, it's not like I can't speak bad about Jeff Bezos. I know. This is still our podcast. If we want to gargle Jeff Bezos' nuts in our mouths, then it's...
Starting point is 00:30:07 If the ad company... It's a benefit to Jeff Bezos that we're sucking him off. Yeah, no, that's a good thing. And if the agency legitimately emailed us and said, all right, guys, with these ad reads, you cannot talk bad about Jeff Bezos. I'm like, wait, that's actually kind of crazy. It's like this billionaire corporate mogul. It's like, you can't talk bad about it. This is really trying to picture
Starting point is 00:30:27 him sucking your dick. It's uncomfortable, isn't it? I could see it. Well, what's mainly uncomfortable is him looking up at me, but he's got that one eye that's all the way open, you know? Is it the one eye that's open where he's like, am I doing this right? Or is he just
Starting point is 00:30:43 kind of like into it? It's like one side of his face is trying to do sexy eyes. But on the other side, it's just like cyber. Always keeping a watch on you. What is with his eye? I don't know. That's okay. There was a guy on 90 Day Fiancé who had this thyroid issue where his eyes were always open like so wide. It was like his eyes were always just like...
Starting point is 00:31:05 Like that guy from the Blue Collar comedy specials? What's his name? It's a real thing where some people, I'm sure there's listeners that have it. You know who I'm talking about? From the Blue Collar. From like the... He would every now and then show up with Ron White, Jeff Foxworthy, Larry the Cable guy, Sinise?
Starting point is 00:31:21 Gary Sinise? Oh, Lieutenant Dan? No, not Sinise. Who am I thinking of? Why didn't I think of Gary Sinise, Gary Sinise. Oh, Lieutenant Dan? No, not Sinise. Who am I thinking of? Why didn't I think of Gary Sinise? Dude, he has the Lieutenant Dan band and I want to go see that live once COVID's done. Blue collar comedians crazy drunk. I don't know. This is
Starting point is 00:31:38 no, not Ron White. Michael Jackson? Michael, no. Who's the one that has the crazy hair and he's always like he looks like that talking about it dude carrot top one time just posted just on his story just like a picture from sucking dick and then
Starting point is 00:31:54 deleted it I mean I don't know if it was real but it was there for a bit wait he posted himself sucking dick yes hold on and he had like come on and I wait let me try to find this because I literally couldn't find anything about it after it happened. I saw,
Starting point is 00:32:08 cause I saw a tweet that was like, is no one going to talk about how Carrot Top just posted a video of him sucking someone off on his Instagram story. And I went and checked and I saw it and then it was gone afterwards.
Starting point is 00:32:17 And I can't find anything about it online. Sorry, hold up. Ew. Dude, Matt. Hold up. This could be us. Hey, Dude, Matt. Hold up.
Starting point is 00:32:27 This could be us. Hey, Ryan. Let me get to it. No. No. Don't just watch porn. No. Make it.
Starting point is 00:32:34 Hold up. Fuck, come on, load. No. No, no. There. This could be us. That looks like us it's like you only see the top of them
Starting point is 00:32:48 both having sex with the girls next to each other one's got the bleached hair with the dark roots and one's got the dark hair one's pumping away he is pumping that shit he's just pumping he is the other guy the other guy's being a little more attentive to the women's to the woman's needs kissing her neck and touching see that's
Starting point is 00:33:04 see that's more like one's making love and one's fucking. Dude, I hate that. This one guy, I think, just like slurped up his cum out of the woman's vagina. That's disgusting. What a weird angle for porn, too. Yeah. Like, I can't get off on that angle. Well, I searched Carrot Top sucking dick, and what comes up is this guy.
Starting point is 00:33:21 It's this guy, this gay porn star, and he looks exactly like the perfect cross between Carrot Top, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and Ed Sheeran. Is that accurate? Yes! More Ed Sheeran, though.
Starting point is 00:33:37 It's the number one thing that comes up for Carrot Top. Who am I fucking thinking of? The crazy dude. Well, hold up. Crazy Steve? No! What's his name
Starting point is 00:33:46 big eyes blue collar crazy blue collar no I'm gonna have Michael show up every now and then he wasn't there maybe he didn't I don't he just seems like he would I think you imagine this guy no I didn't
Starting point is 00:34:03 he has like Trump-ish looking hair. No, that's not him. Who the fuck is that? That's Harry Hill. Come on. Who is this guy? He has like frayed hair, kind of like President Donald Trump. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:34:21 Comedian Ron White busted from marijuana? Comedian Dude, I don't know who you're talking about Southern comedy? I'm just gonna look up He's not southern though Really open eyes? I don't know what this guy
Starting point is 00:34:35 I wish, he's been in movies and shit I just wish I knew what he was in He's been in shitty movies, I'm sure Talking about Rodney Dangerfield? Wait, who? This guy No, not Rodney Whatfield. Wait, who? This guy. No, not Rodney.
Starting point is 00:34:48 What is this fucker's name? He would, like, come up on stage. He always looks like this. He always, like, looks funny. His teeth are all... Marty Feldman? No. Brian Reagan? No, not Brian Reagan.
Starting point is 00:35:02 I'm just trying my hardest here. I'm just throwing darts at this point. Comedian goes crazy. I don't know. Oh, dude, that's going to be crazy, dude. This comedian claps back. This comedian claps back at Donald Trump. Comedian?
Starting point is 00:35:26 I don't know, dude. Dude, I really don't know who you're talking about. I wish. I can picture him clearly. As clear as day. And you know for a fact, though, that someone... Wait, he's been on roast before. Let me see if I can find him in a roast.
Starting point is 00:35:43 It's not Ron White? Roast of... Not him? No. though that someone wait he's been on roast before let me see if I can find him in a roast it's not Ron White roast of not him no roast of Larry the cable guy I think he probably showed up
Starting point is 00:35:51 to this one no okay hold up is it the guy that played Ernest no let me see if he showed up to this one
Starting point is 00:36:00 yep yep yep oh here he is. Yeah, okay. Jim Varney? No, no, wait. Gary this guy. Oh, Gary Busey? Is that his name? Gary Busey.
Starting point is 00:36:16 Is that Gary Busey? Yeah. Yeah. Gary Busey. He plays him? Look him up. Yes, okay. Yeah, dude, he plays the? Look him up. Yes. Okay. Yeah, dude, he plays the dog in that fucking awful movie. But can't you see what I was going with, you know? Yeah, I see it.
Starting point is 00:36:34 I thought you were talking about Ernest for a second. He's kind of known for it, I guess. Yeah. He's on Cameo. Gary Busey. He was in that movie. How did I forget this beautiful man? William Gary Busey and his American actor. As a character actor.
Starting point is 00:36:45 He portrayed buddy Holly in the buddy Holly story where Busey was nominated for the Academy award for best actor and won the national society of film critics award for best actor. So have you seen any of the earnest movies? He's on Twitter. No, no. I only saw the covers in blockbusters.
Starting point is 00:37:04 Yeah. Same. Well, like George, I was talking to George, and George told me how he watched it. Dude, I did not realize, Ernest goes to jail, ends with him killing him in the electric chair, but it fails,
Starting point is 00:37:14 and he gets superhero powers and starts shooting lightning everywhere, and that's how the movie ends. This can't be the real Gary Busey, dude. He looks bad. No, like on his Twitter. He'll post stuff like three days ago he's like you have the ability to be all four seasons in one day and then like not that long ago is it verified yeah he goes okay get spectrum thanks for leaving my 82 year old father-in-law
Starting point is 00:37:40 without service on his first day in assisted living and then he'll retweet like spectrum's apology then he'll go hey at spectrum get spectrum dm sent please make this right that's him yeah i'm looking at it right now dude i'm gonna shoot him a follow actually gary bucey pet judge is a real tv show that will settle your animal dispute in court what the hell that's like a this is like he kinda reminds me of what it's good to be serious by having fun does he have an Instagram hold up
Starting point is 00:38:12 oh you know he does I'm going to Gary Busey's Instagram cell phones don't swim where'd you come up with that one Gary the Gary Busey he has a cameo dude I mean we might be able to get a cameo for the Patrons
Starting point is 00:38:24 for the Patrons for the patrons, for the patrons, for the Patreon users, if they want to see a little shout-out from a... I mean, dude, he plays Quigley. Hey there, it's Gary Busey. I'm on cameo, and I love being a part of your special occasion. I'm here for you. Michael, we're letting Gary's thing play. Michael, we're letting Gary's thing play. Michael, we're letting Gary's thing play.
Starting point is 00:38:49 Yo, so Neo One was my first documentary. Have you seen, wait, shut your mouth. Have you seen, you know what Quigley is, right? No. The movie where he turns into the dog? Oh, okay. What am I going to do now that I'm Quigley? Because I've seen clips and shit.
Starting point is 00:39:01 I tried watching it and it was, like, I tried watching it because it was so bad and funny. It was so bad that it just wasn't even funny. Wait, let me see. What's it? Quigley? That's the name of it? Where it's just like... Where it's like Madea, where you're watching it, and you're like,
Starting point is 00:39:17 What am I going to do now that I'm... Oh, it's bored watching this. Oz Perkins is in it. That's right. Yeah, that movie sucks. I don't know how it ends, but Gary Busey slips in dog poop and he gets hit by a car and turns into a little Pomeranian. And he's like, what's going on? I like in the trailer, it's like, what am I going to do now that I'm Quigley?
Starting point is 00:39:39 Gary Busey. More like Gary Bussie. Come on. Respect him. Gary Busey. We're like Gary Bussey. Come on. Respect him.
Starting point is 00:39:48 Dude, I would respect him if he posted a Bussey picture of him on all fours, showing his little fin boy kind of side, or his bussy. Is a bussy? I'm writing this where the bussy is just like the back of your ball sack, right? It's like the gooch ass back of the ball sack kind of area, I think. Yeah, I think as you see some nutsack, a little bit of nutsack, I feel like that's the bussy, right? You see that kind of... Fine, you know what?
Starting point is 00:40:08 I'm going to look up bussy and see what Webster's Dictionary says. Do you want to see my bussy? I can show you. No, no, no. I've never actually looked at my own bussy. Bussy. Patreon's about to get bussy pics.
Starting point is 00:40:18 Slang term used by gay men to... Well, I didn't use it. I didn't use the term. You didn't use the term? Neither of us used it. Oh, wait, it's in reference to their anus? I know, it's like, it's your boy pussy. Pussy has been used for at least 15 years by gay men to describe their manhole of love. I know,
Starting point is 00:40:36 like, the point is the butthole, obviously, but I think pussy applies to the whole thing. See, whenever I thought of pussy, I thought of, like, what do I think of like you know in porn you know the woman bends over she shows her pussy when I think of bussy I feel like the guy bends over and he
Starting point is 00:40:52 shows the back of his ball sack I don't think bussy is just the butthole I've never thought of it as that bussy transcends that I thought it was like gooch ball sack specifically for some reason for me it's like the back of the ball sack and the butthole's part of it just like the vagina is part of the vagina You know like the vagina hole is part of the vagina
Starting point is 00:41:08 Yes I mean if you guys in the comments want to help us figure out What the true meaning of a pussy is Um you know Maybe you guys can uh You know The tender sweet pussy of a boy Is one definition
Starting point is 00:41:24 Did you see him? My pussy of a boy is one definition did you see him my pussy is wet is an example of uh it used in a sentence thinking about a wet pussy is just gross you know that just means he was sweating a lot or his anus is leaking why have you not why have you not swept your microphone to the side, taken your muscular arm, swiped it across the table, thrown all the candles off, and leapt across this goddamn table and kissed me yet?
Starting point is 00:41:55 Because I have gas right now, and it would be very uncomfortable. I don't want anything to slip out. Mm, okay. Don't do it in the room. No, I got it pointed away. Because Ryan's been bad lately he's dropping trousers
Starting point is 00:42:08 holy shit man I hope the mic's picking that up you shouldn't come in just yet it's gonna follow you dude shut the door airlock for all you people out there You shouldn't come in just yet. It's going to follow you, dude. Shut the door. Shut the door. Airlock. See, for all you people out there that say our podcast is a shell of what it used to be, I present to you this.
Starting point is 00:42:38 Is it still going to come in? I'm just going to accept. I'm going to smell it. It's going to come over here. And with my brand new open nose I can smell I can smell so much sorry I'm having some weird nose problem like mucus
Starting point is 00:42:53 last time I had this much gas my colon malfunctioned and I started bleeding out of my ass you're having a lot of protein right now so we'll say that's the excuse for now honestly it was probably around when i started honestly i think it was when i started taking the protein supplement shit that my shits became very just yeah that's what it does man i i can smell and taste a lot better now it's
Starting point is 00:43:17 like a lot stronger now that i can actually so you can taste my farts yeah well that's the thing was i walked in the kitchen i smelled one of those stinkers earlier and i walked right back out because i was like oh that's the downside of it i'm gonna be able to smell that real good yeah maybe my body will get used to it and it'll you know cycle it through and it'll become more natural and maybe because there's no way i can go through the a long period of time with just being like stinking up an aisle in a 7-Eleven and it just staying there. Did you fart in a 7-Eleven? Yes. Oh God. You're that guy. Well I mean it's empty. I just went at like
Starting point is 00:43:51 when like nobody's there. Unlike Jackson who will do it when there's a lot of people around but it's like oh well they don't know it's me but it's like yeah but when you do that people will also think it's me maybe. No it's like me and then like the clerk who like it's like he just kind of knows me. But if it's just you and the clerk and you do it and people will also think it's me, maybe. No, it's like me and then like the clerk who like, it's like, he just kind of knows me. But if it's just you and the clerk and you do it and he smells it, like you could like
Starting point is 00:44:10 try to play it off on him. Like, you smell that? And like, clearly he knows it's not him because it's just the two of you. Oh, gross. Like guy that's trying to play it off like it's not him, even though there's only one other person. Try doing that in an elevator. Oh, did you fart? But be mean to them about it. Like, seriously, there's only one other person. Try doing that in an elevator. Oh, did you fart?
Starting point is 00:44:26 But be mean to them about it. Like, seriously, that's pretty rude. Dude, you should warn a brother next time. You know, it's kind of rude to do that around other people. I'm just saying. Like, just be an asshole, too. It's like this guy farts, makes them smell it, and then is a dick about it to them. Nathan Fielder does that when he puts the fart machine on that nurse. asshole too. It's like this guy farts, makes them smell it, and then is a dick about it to them. Nathan
Starting point is 00:44:46 Fielder does that when he puts the fart machine on that nurse to make the guy laugh and he's clicking it while she's taking his blood so there's more dopamine in it. And she's like, oh, excuse me. Sorry. And the guy's laughing and she just has to go along with it. Nathan's like, you know, you really should stay home if
Starting point is 00:45:01 your stomach is upset. It's offensive. So we were talking about just Nathan and Eric Andre earlier today. It's just so just beautiful. Beautiful men with beautiful shows. Yeah. And what's always blown me away is that the word American dream has Eric Andre in it. Oh, shit.
Starting point is 00:45:22 Think about it. Has he ever talked about this? Probably. Someone pointed it out one day in like a YouTube comment, and I was like, no way. If you put the tours together, it has Eric Andre in it. Sorry, my nose, I just did this thing where now it's like, all of a sudden I'm getting a lot of stuffage.
Starting point is 00:45:38 Mucus. There's some tissues here. If you need to blow your nose. See, that's the problem. It's not blowable. It's like in the very back of my nasal cavity. You can hawk a loogie. So it's like right when I speak, it's like the air tunnels that...
Starting point is 00:45:52 Ooh, good swallow right there. Yeah. I mean, would you feel better if we just took another ad break? Yeah, yeah. I guess it's a good time for some sponsors. Michael, you could tell us about that thing you were talking about earlier during the break. I tuck them in. I put a little music on. It's a good time for some sponsors. Michael, you could tell us about that thing you were talking about earlier during the break. I tuck them in. I put a little music on.
Starting point is 00:46:08 It's a little story time. I read a book. It's very sweet. Put the fireplace on. I sleep in bed with all of them. All right. Well, go ahead and wrap that story up, Michael, because we've got to get back to the podcast. Good story, though.
Starting point is 00:46:19 Interesting stuff. Anyways, were we talking about anything interesting? My nose. No. Oh, okay. No, it's interesting They restructured your whole nose Just the inside
Starting point is 00:46:29 I don't know It's like, I came back to work with this clearly Clearly I had intense plastic surgery And it looks so bad You have a very boyish curve to it now Like a perfect chisel And it's like Shaped like this I'm playing it off boyish curve to it now. Like a perfect, like, chiseled. And it's like, shaped like this.
Starting point is 00:46:49 I'm playing it off like, no, it was just internal stuff. I was really scared when I was getting this that people online were like, he's getting plastic surgery! Matt's changing, he's getting plastic surgery! No, it's to help his breathing. He stopped breaking himself up in the middle of it. Plastic surgery comes next, Now that I've done this.
Starting point is 00:47:06 Then I'm going to get the facelift. The forehead reduction. I'm going to get my forehead to be only an inch tall. You're going to move your hairline about three inches forward. I couldn't. I'm just trying to picture that like your hairline. It like blends with my eyebrows. I did that to a picture of you.
Starting point is 00:47:24 It'll never grow back. Literally. I did a picture of you. It'll never grow back. Literally. I did a picture of you with your hairline down to there once. It was something we posted, yeah. It just makes you look like a chimp. It really does make you look like a chimp because it frames your face. Like a Neanderthal. Like a really low hairline.
Starting point is 00:47:39 It looks like it's just... Because Neanderthals are just... Like early man. The brow, and then it just goes on. They didn't have to have receding hairlines. They just had hair on everything. Exactly. I remember reading, like, a Ripley's Believe It or Not
Starting point is 00:47:51 about this woman who had hair everywhere. Like, completely covered in hair. Like the wolf man. Yeah, yeah. Maybe it was wolf man. I think it was a woman that had it, too. I mean, you know, equality, whatever. You know, women can be just as hairy as men
Starting point is 00:48:03 if they wanted to. Gross. I know. Icky, icky stuff. Yeah. That's why I wax my body baby clean, except for my face and my head. And my arms. Or anything you can see on camera and prove that I haven't shaved.
Starting point is 00:48:20 I wish that the second you took your shirt and pants off, like, you're starting exactly at the line where your shirt ends. It's fully smooth. Like a farmer's tan, but just with shape. Dude, a hairless body just wouldn't work on me. It wouldn't look right. Really? It would look weird, I think.
Starting point is 00:48:34 I actually agree. You know? I think, like, the hair, well, you're like a masculine. You're a guy's guy, you know? A big, hefty, you know, man. That is true. I'm a guy's guy. You know, a big hefty man. I'm a man's man. I do watch that football and play in the mud with my hat on backwards. Like you can't imagine me with hair all over my body, right?
Starting point is 00:48:57 It just doesn't fit. Maybe like... Like I just strike you as a hairless man. Yeah, but when you're 40, you're going to have hair on you. I have some hair around my... Like I said, I only have one chest hair. I've always had it, and it's the same spot. Didn't Christian pluck it once?
Starting point is 00:49:13 No, it's been plucked. It comes back. Yeah. Because Christian thought that was funny. He's doing a Nuzlocke stream with Jackson. Oh, really? Pokemon, yeah. They've been streaming it.
Starting point is 00:49:21 Apparently, Christian lost like four Pokemon of theirs in a row. How? On the stream. How? Pokemon, yeah. They've been streaming it. Apparently, Christian lost like four Pokemon of theirs in a row. How? On the stream. How? Like, they died. Because, you know, Nuzlocke. If a Pokemon dies, it's dead. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:32 I think they did some cool thing. I want Jackson to set it up for us. Maybe if we play Crystal or something where it's like a randomizer, where like all the Pokemon are randomized. Yeah. Well, we recently started a Pokemon game. We started Pokemon Colosseum, and I'm excited for that to come out whenever it comes out. Me too. It's so much fun.
Starting point is 00:49:48 It should be out real soon. We have a backlog. We just need to start putting shit out, essentially. Yeah, the Patreon shit has pissed us off. That's the big one. I tried uploading it again today because we've tried throughout the week, and again, it uploads,
Starting point is 00:50:03 and then it just stalls and continuously loads and doesn't process at all. It's been doing that with every video we try to post. And Patreon, their comment system's broken, their messaging system's broken. And we've been trying to get in contact
Starting point is 00:50:15 with Patreon and they have not been getting back to us. We got one of the bot replied tweets from them. And I was like, y'all, come on. It's the super mega boys. Come on, we're super mega.
Starting point is 00:50:25 Don't you know who we are? The guy that we used to have phone calls with at Patreon doesn't work there anymore. He was nice. Very sweet young man. He was a nice dude. Beautiful accent. Yeah. He had that British accent.
Starting point is 00:50:35 It was gorgeous. I'm not making that up. He had a British accent, right? You know, I remember his appearance. I don't remember his voice at all. You know, I actually saw him at... I've only met him once. And that was at Tender Greens when we had our powwow.
Starting point is 00:50:51 I saw him at Gus and Eddie's place once. They were having a party. And I showed up and he was there. So was Jakey. It's the first time I met Jakey. Is that when Gus was scolding Eddie for not being cool or whatever? No, that was a different time. This was the one where Gus drank too much.
Starting point is 00:51:09 And he did the whole thing. And they had to call the police. They had to fix the window. No, I remember that night. I wasn't there. I remember you texting me about it. Yeah, that was really bad. You sent me some pictures, which were funny. It was definitely funny, but looking back,
Starting point is 00:51:24 it definitely went a little too far. It caused a lot of pain that night, I would say, to a lot of homeless people. Yeah. Thankfully, not too much property damage. Yeah. Exactly, yeah. Or at least other people's property. The whole gasoline fire thing on the streets with people. But that's,
Starting point is 00:51:40 you know, Gus likes to party. What can I say? That's Gus. He's a party boy. Party animal, you know? A hearty party boy. I I say that's Gus he's a party boy party animal you know a hearty party boy I miss parties man I can't wait until COVID's over so we can
Starting point is 00:51:51 we can go to parties again parties are so cause like when people think of party I used to be really scared of parties when I thought of it it was just like oh yeah
Starting point is 00:51:59 like dancing with like no it was just club music yeah it's just like going to someone's place having a bunch of friends there and people you can just have a bunch of different conversations with,
Starting point is 00:52:08 have a couple drinks, smoke a little weed, have some, have some, there's a bowl of pretzels. Maybe game a new friend or two. Yeah, maybe game a little bit. Maybe.
Starting point is 00:52:15 And have the TV set up with some Smash or something. Classic. Oh, shit. I didn't get to have my birthday party this year, so I'm gonna have to have a, what's the word?
Starting point is 00:52:29 Thinking sexual. birthday party this year so i'm gonna have to have a uh what's the word uh uh thinking sexual no not that michael um a later on belated belated birthday party yeah sure that works i think that's what you were looking for it's not because whenever you say something about a birthday it's usually a belated birthday. Why is belated? Like, why does it only apply to birthdays? People don't say, like, belated to other holidays. Is belated specifically a birthday word? It's just wonderful alliteration. It's interesting alliteration.
Starting point is 00:52:56 Going outside to rip some ass? Wait, wait, turn the mic down. Wait. Go. What if you just saw it like dripping onto the floor? And you're like covering it up with your foot trying not to, like for me not to notice. Dude, I went to the doctor's office today. I didn't realize how much mud was on my shoes because I went for a little hike after it rained.
Starting point is 00:53:18 Oh, nice. And the bottom of my shoes got soaked, caked in mud. And it dried. And when I ran out the door this morning I didn't notice that and I noticed when I'm in the doctor wherever I'm walking it's dirt everywhere like all around my feet and I was like shit it was dried it was crumbling that's how I feel when I'm going out
Starting point is 00:53:34 to like visit friends in like the dimly lit area of like where I put on my shirt like in my room or something I like look at my shirt and I'm like okay and then as I'm driving I look down and I just notice all the Legogo hair on and i'm like you're about to say come no that has happened one time where i where i like uh threw on a shirt you're like oh yeah well no it was mostly like i was i actually was at the super megaplex and i like just put on a sweater from the like night
Starting point is 00:54:03 before to just to wear and i noticed after like while i was driving home like a little bit on the what is what's that part just the bottom of the shirt there was a little chest not the chest the uh fuck man my did you let me know huh one time i i don't think i let you know i picked up a t-shirt to put on once and you know guys you could shame me we've all busted on a t-shirt before when there was nothing else around. I started putting it on and I was like, oh no no no no, I took it off. Oh, wait wait wait, let me, I took the mic this way, go. Damn. My god.
Starting point is 00:54:37 That's sexual. Damn. There's a lot in there. There's a lot, man. Like fucking genie in a bottle over here. I don't know why, dude. I'm telling you. I mean, they didn't like fix anything with my colon. They just went, I don't know what the problem is.
Starting point is 00:54:52 Oh, I mean. So I could be having another stint. I could just have Crohn's disease and I'm having another flare up. It's specifically a year after I had my last. You don't look metallic. Come on. It's like Crohn's disease. I do have to pee. Hey, man. I mean, we can wrap it up here.
Starting point is 00:55:07 Okay, yeah, we can wrap it up. We can wrap up the podcast if you guys take a piss. I mean, I guess I thank you to our guest, Michael. Big round of applause for Michael. All right. Just don't applaud yourself. All right, well, we'll see you guys next week for 237. Should we have him sing us out or do something?
Starting point is 00:55:26 Or do you want to just end with a song? Yeah, you want to sing this out, Michael? Well, copyright, but I guess we can. I mean, you just do an acapella or something, all right? Woo! Woo! Chugga-chugga, chugga-chugga. Bow! Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well I absolutely love this because you know if you own a home it can be really hard to maintain it's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well,
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