supermegashow - EP 241 - Stomach Sounds

Episode Date: April 21, 2021

Listen to our stomachs. Go to Curology.com/super for a free 30-day trial, just pay for shipping and handling! Cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a month at MintMobile.com/SUPERMEGA. As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at BetterHelp.com/supermega  Get Honey for FREE at Join Honey.com/MEGACAST. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because, you know, if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now, all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience, and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app, answer a few questions, and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish.

Or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly. Which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps. Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I.com. Trick or treat. Smell my feet. Give me something good to eat. If you don't, I don't care. I'll pull down your underwear. Don't do that. I'll have to call the police. I'll pull down my underwear and moon you. That's what she means. I'll pull down my underwear. I thought it was

for the long... I thought it was pull down my... I'll pull down my underwear. So when you would say it to people, you would just flash them. Whoa, geez, man. Yeah. A lot of adults at the time were... I didn't understand why they were so uncomfortable. I'm like, we all got a penis.

I remember my cousin... What you looking at, uncomfortable. I'm like, we all got a penis. I remember my cousin. What you looking at, Mr. Jacobs? Nothing, nothing, nothing. I'm not looking at the penis. Oh, are you sure? I'm shaking it around. Are you sure you're not looking? You know, if you look,

my mom works for the federal government. Oh. But then if he goes to your mom, he's like, Cecile, your son was showing me his penis. You know, there's really no way that that's ever going to look good for him. Even if like he's just... I know.

Like if you were being that, like doing that, and he goes to your mom, like just genuinely... Wait, what? No, I mean, I didn't look at it. You've seen his penis? No, I didn't look at it, but he was showing it to me. Why was he showing you his penis? I don't know. I don't know.

See, there's really no winning there. No. So kids, if you want to prank an adult and get them in trouble, show them your penis. Don't do this. Unless it's hilarious. Welcome to Super Megacast episode 241. Yeah. Started off with some knowledge.

We dropped some fresh effing knowledge. Some truth bombs, you know. That's what they call fresh effing knowledge. Some truth bombs. You know, that's what they call them. Hold up. Wait one second. Where you going, bro? Slapped his ass at me. Spent over.

Is this like a Pop-Tart? Let me see. Let me see. Oh, it doesn't look like a strawberry Pop-Tart. But it looks about as sweet as one. Let me find my coffee. Yeah, we're getting some drinks. Hey, we got our drinks. I got my coffee. Yeah, we're getting some drinks! Hey, we got our drinks.

I got my coffee. I couldn't find my coffee. And then I realized I left it outside. Oh man, I forgot I got the grapefruit one. You don't like grapefruit? It smells like BO. It smells like if you just put your nose in someone's armpit. Okay, well now I never thought of it that way, but now I'm not going to be able to unnote. I'll drink that actually, though.

Okay, I got to go get another one. Entertain them this time. Okay. Oh, there's something I've been, we've been meaning to update you guys on the last like three podcasts, but forgot. It's nuts. It's not these nuts. However, those, if you want an update on those they're doing just fine um if you guys remember last year we talked about a little bird named wanda a little dove that was um

in our patio area at the super yeah at the super megaplex she was just sitting out there last year and had two little babies and uh we were giving you guys updates on her and then she left one day and so did the babies but guess what she came back like a month ago we just kept meaning to update and uh now there's two big babies sitting in that nest hope one of them's a female so then they can continue the cycle and come back and do it again next year i honestly didn't believe that they would come back because i remember you just about a month prior to wanda's uh daughter returning you're like it's not her i wonder yeah i wonder if one because wanda came two years in a row one time without without little babies i guess just building the nest oh this is this guy it's kind of cute it's like this is like this is the home i grew up in

no she was here before we even got the office yeah i remember when we were doing the uh the tour it was around this time of year uh it was like may i think i remember that the realtor was like oh yeah a little uh roommate there and um yeah so this is i guess, the baby of Wanda came back, laid eggs. The baby? Let's go. Come on. And, yeah, now there's two little, we knew that they hatched because she started, like, raising up, like, where she looked really uncomfortable. And then I saw one of the, like, wings poking out, so she was sitting on them.

And now they're too big for her to sit on, so she just sits in there with them. She's not in the nest right now. She's either going out and getting food, although I think they're old enough. They're going to fly one day. They're going to just not be here. In the next week, probably. They're pretty big now. She might be gone now.

Every time she's gone, I'm like, is she getting food, or is she just gone? Yeah. Is she just gone? So Wanda, too. Yeah, she gave birth to two beautiful little doves and um they look so stupid they always have the stupidest look on their face well i love that they're just like i like how disheveled they look yeah because they're like because she sits i actually have a picture i took a picture of uh wanda or one we did we name this one wanda two

one one two two uh i got a picture of Wanda 2 sitting with her children I guess I'll just put it up on the YouTube version here it is and then we're gonna see the comments the only reason I came here is for the picture and he forgot to put it I'll try to remember sound like Chris Chan

he forgot to put it he forgot to put it yeah but we'll keep you updated next week if they fly away or if hopefully next year they'll be back again. One of those little babies might come back, have some eggs of its own, and then we're on the next generation. Wanda 3 comes back. We already...

What's their lifespan? I don't know how long doves live. It's a dove, right? It's not a pigeon. Yeah. Birds usually... Well, some birds live a good bit. Like, parrots live a while, right?

Like, 30 years or some shit like that? No, parrots can live to be like 80 or 90. What? Yeah. Are you effing kidding me? Which is why I could never have one as a pet. No fucking way. Like, the big ones, yeah.

How old? Because you get a parrot, dude. That's like a, like, I've always wanted a parrot, but it's like, I cannot deal with a fucking screaming, stinky bird until the day I die. But it's like I cannot deal with the fucking screaming stinky bird until the day I die. Some large parrot species, including large cockatoos, amazons and macaws, have very long lifespans with 80 years being reported and record ages of over 100. Damn. Holy shit. Small parrot churches, lovebirds, sorry, lovebirds, hanging parrots, budgies have shorter lifespans of 15 to 20 years.

Let me look up. Still, that's like the lifespan of a cat. So a dove lifespan is about two years. Oh, so Wanda might actually have already passed, actually. Adult morning doves, which is what I'm guessing they are, live about two years in the wild. Some cases, however, have noted a lifespan of five, seven, and ten years. Hmm. But what a short lifespan.

Imagine only being here that long. Yeah. You're also like prey to a lot of things. Don't mosquitoes only live for like two days? I can look that up right now. What creature has the shortest lifespan? Mosquitos. Shortest

life? Seven days. Seven days? Yeah. Damn. What's the shortest lifespan of a creature? It's the mayfly, which doesn't even get to 24 hours usually. Holy shit, the Greenland shark lives for over 270 years.

Wait, I gotta look this up. Wait, hold up. The fuck? How old can tortoise... Yeah, tortoises can be like... 80 to 150 years, but... Wait, how old can lobsters get, dude? What the fuck?

Lobsters usually feed on bottom dwellers 40 pounds. It is believed that lobsters can live as long as 100 years what yeah how like what why is it some things can just you want to get your mind blown ready greenland sharks are currently the vertebrae species with the longest known lifespan uh by radiocarbon dating uh they figured out that the longest one to ever live lived for 512 years. Oh it's these freaky fuckers. Greenland sharks? Yeah. A minimum of 272 and a

maximum of 512 was from what they sampled? Holy shit. What the fuck dude? That's crazy. What is um you know in the bible how it's like talks about like Noah's son was 954 like what are they going by a different calendar? I'm guessing or did they are they like no they're actually 900 years old They asked him how old are you?

Oh my god, that was his response because he was so old he couldn't even speak words anymore he just spews just green all right dude so i'm looking up longest living creatures and please don't tell me this doesn't look like a penis dude like that's 100 an actual penis that looks like if a parasite got into your balls and then like use your penis to create its kind of like look oh you know what i mean like the legs come out of the shaft like out of the spout wait is that what you call it biological what's the hole of the penis called the meatus or the hole the urethral opening yeah is that it it's not doesn't have like a just like a madonna type like one name thing well the meatus is the opening around it see like but what's what's a woman's pee hole then just the urethra it's the same thing yeah well the urethra is the tube like that

that the urethral opening is i think it's just the urethra it's not like we have a name for the outside of the belly button it's just all the belly button i get it but that's what i'm saying belly button that's a better that's a better name or your navel right we'll call it we'll call it is that what this is navel dick button pussy button for the for where you pee out of i'm reading about biological immortality wow lobsters can live forever dude i'm looking at there's there's hydras that's the thing that looks like a penis a pretty epic man you don't fucking understand how epic lobsters are it makes me cry and it makes me sometimes when i masturbate and i think about the lobsters you know i i cum me jimmies the lobster i cry come meet Jimmy's. And I cry. The Lobster should have been about Jordan Peterson.

And he turns into a lobster. Just replace Colin Farrell's voice. Just replace Colin Farrell with Jordan Peterson in that movie. Bisexual. Bisexual. Jordan Peterson's bisexual. I'd like to be a lobster. Find love. I'd like to be a lobster. Find love.

I'd like to be a lobster, man. That's a good movie. That's still my favorite movie of his. I didn't watch... Then it's the favorite. When I watched it, I just didn't really get to pay attention. I didn't get to watch it very closely, so it kind of confused me. When I watched it, I was kind of not fully attentive.

I saw it with my stepmom back at the Nickelodeon in columbia it's very awkward in certain scenes yeah i'm trying to think the most awkward movie i've ever seen with my parents for me i i think it was watchman because there's this like slow motion sex scene in a spaceship there's penis always showing there's a penis showing but that was fine because they didn't like make a big deal out of it. It was just kind of like weird that they added that or they kept that, I guess.

But it was the sex scene between Owl Dude and Maeve. No, not Maeve. That's from the boys. If from Malin Ackerman's or Malin, whatever, how do you pronounce her name? Malin Ackerman's character. They like how do you pronounce her name Malin Ackerman's character

they like had a slow motion sex scene in his little spaceship to Leonard Cohen and they did the whole thing like when he comes they accidentally

press a button and flamethrowers go having sex to Leonard Cohen is it was to Hallelujah

why would you ever have sex to Leonard Cohen Hallelujah I remember that scene dude It was the hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah I remember that scene dude I was just like Cause the thing is I'm somewhat excited

I'm seeing boobs You've never had sex before I've never had sex before I'm seeing like boobs But your stepmom's sitting right there My stepmom and my dad are sitting there For a lot of people this is a fantasy right now That's a fantasy Sitting next to your stepmom It's like there. My stepmom and my dad are sitting there. For a lot of people, this is a fantasy right now. And I'm just like, that's a fantasy.

You sit next to your stepmom and... It's like, the best way I can describe it is like nervous agitation. It's like, let me enjoy the movie. Why can't I enjoy it? And then I, yeah, I came me jimmies. There's... Ah, fuck, I came me jimmies again. Oh, I love, I just came me jimmies there's fuck i came me jimmies i love i just came me

jimmies the beatles on stage like stop i just popped in me jimmies stop stop stop stop the song stop the song paul i came me jimmies yeah oh paul paul looks like you popped off in your

jimmies i think i popped off in me jimmies. Popped off? Oi! I think I popped off in me jimmies. Ringo, why aren't you playing drums? Oh, I think I popped off in me jimmies. Oh, you know, I just kind of would sometimes pop off in me jimmies. You know who popped off in their jimmies? Who? The Beatles?

John Lennon. John Lennon did pop off. He did. He popped off in his jimmies real hard. Oh, fuck. Rest in peace. Yeah. Yeah. John Lennon did pop off he did he popped off in his gym he's real hard oh fuck rest in peace yeah yeah

Ryan's smoking meth real quick hold on ooh that's a lot of meth god damn you feel that meth right away that's good stuff

god that's good stuff. God, that's good shit. Where'd you get this from? Just that- Or was it Jackson who got it? I can't- No. It was here when I got here. No, Jackson hooked me up with this guy, but it's-

You know when you're on your way to the office and you pass that Hawaiian barbecue place? You ever see that dude that's standing out? He's almost always outside. It's that guy. I'm gonna have to take another. Some more meth? meth some more meth i might have to have some meth too i'll try some meth why not meth is okay i mean meth has such a bad stigma but honestly meth is fine people make such a big deal out of it.

There's going to be one kid out there that's like, they're fucking smoking meth. I know. No, it's just crack. I suck at the fucking bong, dude. I'll tell you when. You just look for the smoke. It might be ash, too.

I don't know if there's... I got enough. I'm taking maple syrup. Were you eating pancakes? No. Yeah. Yeah, we're stoners now. No, 420 just went by yesterday. And so we have so much weed at the office now.

From our videos that we did. So thank you guys for the love and support on those. From the videos and the photo shoots for the merch. Yeah, for the photo shoots, for some reason, our merch guy, Leighton, was like, he's like, we need some weed to put around the items for the pictures. I was like, okay, I'll go and buy some. He's like, we need like two ounces. And I was like, two ounces is a lot of weed.

And he's like, no, two ounces. So I went and I bought two ounces of weed, which the legal limit, you can only buy one. So Jack's trying to buy the other one. So Patreon money's going to good use. And now we have an abundance of marijuana at the office. And we were, when we were uh watching

the final cut of super monkey bong the night before we're sitting there and ryan was like you know what's fucked up there are thousands of people in prison for life right now in this same country right now and we're just sitting here making a stupid video about it it's technically someone in prison on their on their uh in their library time, you know, they always have like, they always give them like warm meals and five hours in the library with a blanket. Yeah. Do you think that they ever, do you think they watch our Let's Plays is what I'm saying. Do you think for the same crime they committed, but I'm sure they're comfortable in their

blankets and warm, hot meals and. Oh yeah. And. Cause right after that, they get to go to the spa. Yep. Do you think that anyone in prison watches us like do you think there's anyone that like in their free time in the library in prison if are you allowed to go on youtube in prison i don't think you're supposed you you go on the internet in prison i think uh contraband phones are how people like do tiktok

okay do you think there's anyone in prison that has a contraband phone that uses it to watch super mega no or listen to this maybe like laying in laying in his prison cell like like with the phone under his pillow so no one hears it like echoing through it like a giant like prison like block just they're all laughing and the warden comes in what the hell is going on here like everyone goes quiet now i know i heard some laughter in here. And all of a sudden, just... What's that? Nothing, warden. And then the second he leaves, he hears everyone just... Because we're farting into the microphone and saying,

Dee's nuts. And the entire cell block is up in... What is the word? Up in... Smoke? Flames? No, not... No, they'd be dying.

They laugh, they, they, they, the phone, because it's a bootleg one, it's a Samsung. It exploded and set the whole cell block on fire and they all perished. But at least they perished with joy because they were listening to the Super Mega Podcast. That is true. They went up what? What are you talking about, though? No, they were all up in cahoots? Is that what I'm thinking of? All up in each other's business? All up in your grill? No, because they were in different cells.

I just love the visual of the warden comes out of his little room in his nightgown and he's all like, What the hell? With the hat and everything and slippers and a flashlight. And the flashlight has the fucking wax candle with the hat and everything like slippers and a flashlight and the flashlight like has the flashlight oh yes the fucking wax candle with the like golden holder what are you boys talking about

and and then it's just crickets and then he leaves and you can hear no it's gotta be it's gotta be like uh it's still a candle but it has that like glass vase outer thing so it's i guess you just call it a lantern at that point, but it's a glass lantern. I like to now let's combine this with the scene in full metal jacket where, how about, um, uh, the,

uh, private pile. Um, you know, the, the guy that, uh, gets the guy that's not too smart and he's in the bathroom late at night and

full metal jacket and he's loading up the shotgun with full metal jack but instead of that he's holding an ipad watching super mega and he's staring at it and he's staring at it because he's so he's he's so enthralled by it and then uh what's his face walks in and he's like what are you doing and then he goes super mega cast and then the warden walks in. He's like, what the hell is going on here? And then he just shoots him. Yeah. Yeah.

That's just how that one ends. But that scene actually takes place in South Carolina. So good. The whole first half of Full Metal Jacket, which I think is Kubrick's best movie. South Carolina recently, by the way, was in the news again. Oh, why? Because, did you see the video of like the guys, it's kind of like this bald guy wears a shirt that's too tight on him. And he's like, kind of like, there's a black kid and he's like, what do you do walking around our neighborhood?

The kid's just like, what? He's just some guy just kind of profiling a kid for walking around his neighborhood, essentially. I'm like, I am not surprised it's South Carolina. I know, I didn't know it was, but then my mom was like, did you see that video in South Carolina? And I was like, oh, of course it was fucking South Carolina. Yeah, that was Jim. Can you believe it or not? South Carolina has like some of like, oh, of course it was fucking South Carolina. Yeah, that was Jim. Can you believe it or not? South Carolina has like some

of the worst fucking shit in history. Yeah, we don't have a great history recently, too. We have the Walter Scott shooting, which is when he got stopped for a non-functioning brake light and then got shot. In the back, while he was running away. And then the cop went and put the gun

on him to make it look like he had, but someone got it on camera, so he went to prison. And then the cop went and put the gun on him to make it look like he had, but someone got it on camera. So he went to prison. And then also we had the Dylann Roof shooting. Yes. In Charleston. So, yeah, not the best. And also, dude, that's crazy that with the Walter Scott thing, it's like, if that person hadn't been there and filmed that, nothing would happen.

That's, I was – So how many cases are there? Well, I was seeing something recently of the only reason there was justice recently with Derek Chauvin or however the fuck you want to pronounce it. Derek Gayman. Chauvin, yeah. Was that like if no one recorded or held the police accountable, he would have just gotten off scot-free. There would have been a man legitimately murdered. the police accountable he would have just gotten off scot-free there would have been a man legitimately murdered by the way it is now you know three counts but you know guilty two counts

of homicide and one count of manslaughter yeah capital g-u-i-l-t-y so uh thank god so it seems like a piece of shit what he was not okay he was technically he was murdered now like but did you know that george floyd also recreationally used drugs ryan did you know that uh stephen crowder recently or i can't remember if it was recently it was some down he did a video of some guy kneeling on his neck going like see this wouldn't kill you oh my fucking god see now put. See how I'm still able to talk? That's disgusting. Yeah. That's fucking disgusting. Steven Crowder is like the kind of disgust, like TMZ vibe of right wing.

That's disgusting, man. Like he doesn't do like celebrity shit, but he gets on all the big topics and he tries to like really get people. He knows what he's doing. So, I mean disgusting yeah I was surprised the verdict because usually

this stuff it's like oh he's guilty I mean he's innocent I was pleasantly surprised by that but yeah that was I'm glad when they said that the jury deliberated and had an answer in like 10 minutes

or something I was like alright that's good news yeah no no I mean he's innocent that's why we we knew that from the start yeah no

he was on his neck for 9 minutes and then uh I didn't know this I heard this from the case that like a paramedic even came up at one point when she saw like

he wasn't breathing or something and like tried to help and he made her go away really? was it like was it like plain clothes or was it like it? I think that was the thing.

It was a paramedic that came by. I was trying to think of the video. Fucking awful video. I didn't like first time I saw that I was like, Jesus fucking Christ. That's one of the worst things I've ever seen. Yeah. Well, like it just kind of like the, the thing about the video specifically was that i had already of course you know you hear the news that you know you hear that george floyd was killed uh and so you watch

the video knowing what's going to happen and so the whole time you're watching it all that's going through your head is just take your knee off of his neck you can't breathe just just take it because you already you already know the fucking ending and you're just like, if Derek Chauvin wasn't a police officer, George Floyd would be alive today. And he calls for his mom

in the video. It's awful. It's fucking awful. So people have the audacity to be like, yeah, but he had drugs in his system.

It's like, that's not what killed him, you fucking idiot. Like, go watch the whole video and tell me it's disgusting it's so awful but you know that that is a uh i'm glad there's accountability in this case accountability and i feel like a majority of people uh that looked at the event saw it for what it was yeah i this one didn't even feel like because you know like it definitely got

political and there were people like fighting against it Trayvon Martin stuff, that was very divided and people were like, no, George Zimmerman was in the right. But like this one almost everyone was kind of like, oh yeah, he killed him So if you are in the French group of people that say that you know, then

maybe rethink things. I hate when they get political This black man got murdered on video and got found Derek Chauvin is about to get sent to Camp Green Lake Maybe rethink things. I hate when they get political. This black man got murdered on video and got found. Derek Chauvin's about to get sent to Camp Green Lake. Yeah, he's going to be digging some holes for it. Derek Chauvin, I sentence you to 18 months at Camp Green Lake. Take a bad boy, make him dig six feet.

No, just keep digging. He's like 50 feet down. Keep going, boy. feet down keep going boy no keep going they have other people start shoveling into the hole I swear I'm not getting anywhere no just keep going dude I wish Camp Green Lake was real

and they would just send the worst that was like the most maximum like security like for like terrorists and like you know like the worst of the worst instead of Guantanamo Bay it's like Camp Green Lake

Cape Cape Green Lake it's in Florida yeah it's where the rockets just take off speaking of Camp Green Lake I want to watch Holes we gotta film ourselves

watching Holes we actually started doing a video recently a live action video we talked about this yeah but it you know camera didn't record audio.

So we're gonna have to watch holes again, but I'm not complaining about that. I just get to watch holes with my buddy, Matt, and have some snacks and treats. It was great. It's fantastic. I don't, I don't have a, maybe we'll take the old one that no audio and we can make a little music video out of it. Okay. I'll make this little song about watching holes with my friend, Ryan, and put that footage

over it. Cause there's gonna be a lot of unexplained bits that we shot. Like there's one where I have what looks like cum in my hand. So that will just randomly be in the video with no context. Yeah. Because the bit won't be explained because there's no audio. So. Make something good out of it. But thank you guys again

for the 420 the 420 merch. For everyone who supported us and got some swag. We got word that almost all of the Super Mega Mart merch from earlier this month has shipped out. So y'all should be getting that very, very soon. And some people I did see also say like, oh, I didn't get a confirmation email. For some reasons that some people don't get one.

And I don't know why. That's something with our merch providers. So if you didn't get one, orders at second city prince.com, but if you didn't get one, that, that does not mean that your order is not confirmed or not coming. Yeah. Um,

but yeah, thank you guys so much for the support. It's, it's making us bust in our jimmies. That's, that's, that's correct. They become me jimmies.

It's making me pop off. I was just thinking about how fucking gone we were after Super Monkey Bong. Let's talk about that, man, because that was so... I almost threw up on the ride home. Oh, the ride home for me. I was nauseous. Probably because Harrison's driving is garbage. Yes.

He drives like a Nancy boy. Oh, yeah. Like a Nancy boy in a bumper car. A Nancy boy with something to prove. You're acting like a Nancy boy with a bumper car. A Nancy boy with something to prove. You're acting like a Nancy boy with something to prove. Yeah, no, Jackson was driving me home, and Jackson's driving is no better. But it ain't no worse. So, yeah, I had to have my head out the window for the ride home just for the air.

But basically that, you know, barn rips are pretty intense. And then also that weed. High THC. People were questioning. No. So do you remember? It was like a high. They went out and got like a 44.1%.

But they got it from. So it's like a very big. What is the brand? Can I go find that actually? I don't know where it is. You said it's here at the office, right? Yeah, I haven't seen it. But basically the thing is like the highest THC weed I've ever smoked was 30%.

And that had me zooted. And we didn't even know it was 44% until like afterwards. Like that was 44.1%. And it was like great. We just did like 11 bong rips. So I had – I don't really remember the rest of the night after that. I went home and I slept for like 13 hours. That's not fun to get that high, like getting getting high, smoking a little weed.

That's fun with your friends hanging out. But like that level is uncomfortable. You feel anxious. The energy feels weird. You start like getting paranoid. You start just feeling like antsy. Everything like physically feels weird. Like your body feels like discombobulated and drinking water and eating feels weird. So

let me see. No, no, no. So that's what it was, but he, they took it and put it into a different container. So we wouldn't see how high percentage it was. The container is at our house. So that, that is not the actual brand that we smoked in the video they just put it in there so we wouldn't notice okay um yeah ah damn mm-hmm i don't want to ever get that high again that's not fun that was crazy i just feel stupid i feel like when i got home i think i finally like was like able to be like i i was when i got home i i was like just as bad i felt like i was tripping i actually um i don't like getting that high i don't want to get that high again uh same with dank drawing because we had to do those what two nights back to back right yeah and and like my that was that

fries your brain that was not getting that high, especially twice in one week. That's not good for your brain. Yeah. Like and also when you're high, you just like things tend to just go by. Sometimes they're like kind of slower. Hence why the original the full recording for these ad reads. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because, you know, if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain.

It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now, all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience, and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app, answer a few questions, and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish.

Or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly. Which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps. Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I dot com. FanDuel Casino's exclusive live dealer studio has your chance at the number one feeling, winning, which beats even the 27th best feeling, saying I do. Who wants this last parachute? I do. Enjoy the number one feeling, winning, in an exciting live dealer studio, exclusively on FanDuel Casino, where winning is undefeated.

19 plus and physically located in Ontario. Gambling problem? Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca. Please play responsibly. Nice. Yeah. The full recording for Dank Drawing was two hours. Please play responsibly. I've created this you can't trust me now when I'm asking you questions well in the Patreon

video of the 10 minutes of conversation after Super Monkey Bong we're sitting on the couch just talking about shit there's the part where you go up for a high five and I flinch really hard because I thought you were about to hit me you made a compilation out of that because that's happened several times now I know but I don't hit you I always just like

place my hand on your shoulder well like if for instance in drunk drawing you. I always just like place my hand on your shoulder. Well, like if, for instance, in drunk drawing, you'll randomly just be like, and like just slap me or something when you're drunk. So when I'm sitting there and I'm high and paranoid and I see you raise your hand out of the corner of my eye, my brain is, you know, it's trying to protect myself. It's like, oh, go into this flinching position. So to minimize the damage and pain that you're about to receive. I'd flinch too, dude. But you didn't give me two for flinching, man. You the damage and pain that you're about to receive i'd flinch too

dude but you didn't give me two for flinching man you could have i could have you could have really given me two for flinching but i think you i think you learned your lesson the flinch showed me you already knew the flinch showed showed you that i have a level of respect for you exactly that you know i will not break and um you have a level of respect for my physical strength oh yeah so and your mental strength and emotional strength because because you can't you can't be uh at that physically aggressive without having a strong mental will exactly and and strong healthy set of of uh emotions too and eyes yeah you've got to see where you're laying those fists. Where you're throwing those bad boys.

Yeah. And I can see too. It's like a radar with these babies. It goes off and you can't even control it. Sometimes I'm next to you and that thing starts flashing and you've just got to do what you've got to do, man, and I don't blame you at all. Yeah. So, you know, you're keeping me in line, so thank you.

Keeping me in line. Sorry, my stomach was going my stomach is gurgling like crazy right now because i haven't eaten yet i've just had coffee and when i just have coffee it's my stomach like yo bro and i ain't too pleased with me it It's like a... Man. Yeah, my stomach's actually really hurting right now. But at the same time, I'm like, what am I in the mood for? I'm not hungry. Listen, listen.

Can you hear it, Wade? But I want to eat, because I just... It did it, so... It gurgled. Did you hear that? That was a big one. Yeah, my stomach's really gurgling right now.

It's going to do it again, dude. It won't stop. Do it. Y'all like this? Is this turning someone on? I'm waiting. Just waiting for it. I'm waiting, dude. That's mine.

Mine did it too at the same time. What is it when your stomach's gurgling? Is it just stuff moving around? I guess. Is it just digesting? Is it like your stomach's emptying of what's in it down to your lower intestine or upper intestine? We can look it up.

Dude, will you give me a Columbia necktie later? Sure. Why does my stomach gurgle? Boom. Oh, no. So easy. we can actually find out the answers matthew aaron my stomach's making a scary noise stomach growling occurs as food liquid and gas go through the stomach and small intestine stomach growling or rumbling is a normal part of digestion there is nothing in the stomach to muffle these sounds so they can be noticeable. Among the causes are hunger, incomplete digestion, or indigestion. So upset stomach, diarrhea. I was trying to remember the Pepto-Bismol jingle right there, but I couldn't.

What is it? Heartburn? Headache, heartburn,burn indigestion upset stomach diarrhea that does not help with headaches oh well let's see heartburn heartburn nausea upset stomach indigestion pepto diet bismal what is it dude i forgot there was a president or someone like a president. Nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, diarrhea. Hey, Pepto-Pepto. Dude, my headache's not going away.

I'm fucking already down two bottles of Pepto. Dude, this stuff's not working. A little Pepto will clear you right up. I actually might be one of the only people I know that actually likes the taste of Pepto Bismol. Who does? I do. Oh. I like the taste and texture of Pepto

Bismol. And some people think it's disgusting. I like it. See, I understand that. I'm the way with Tums. I love the way Tums is. It's so great. One of the best decisions I ever did was next to my bed.

My desk is right next to my bed and there's a drawer I can pull out. And I have a little plastic container and I just pour a bunch of Tums in there. So it's just filled with Tums. So in the middle of the night, I can just open it up, reach in, pull a Tum out, shut the drawer and go back to sleep. It's fantastic. So when I wake up and I have like heartburn or indigestion at like 2 a.m. Upset stomach. Diarrhea, headache.

I don't have to, I don't have to like be like, oh, I have to get up. Because, you know, when it like tums in the other room, you wake up, you're like, should I just try to like lay here and like try to fight it out and go back to sleep and hopefully it won't hurt that bad. But no, I can just reach over and boom, take a couple Tums, man. I have the berry smoothie ones. They're really good. Berry has a Tums flavor?

Yeah, it's crazy, man. Ever since he left Tums Berry Smoothie. That's why he left Game Grumps. Because he actually said, Aaron, I actually really want to fulfill my dreams of making my own flavor of Tums. And he did it. The crazy bastard did it. Isn't that wild?

He's still streaming. Yeah, he is. He's still creaming too. Yeah, I see him whenever he's going live on Twitch. Does he ever DM you those pictures of

he comes in a Petri dish, puts it under a blacklight? Okay, I was about to say, but for me, it's a fish bowl. Okay. Was there a fish in it? A few. Because he hasn't done that for me. He just does the Petri dish. Yeah.

Which I'm like. And the fish just go at it like it's food because it. Well, it's protein. It like hangs at the surface because it's a solid material yeah so i bear's a weird dude um not really sure what what is going through his mind when he does that but you know all the best to him i'm not gonna complain you know we all do we all have our vices right we all have our vices man you know but anyways i hope he's doing i hope he's doing well yeah i miss him well i mean by the color of that semen he's doing he's eating

good oh yeah it's not discolored at all so it's not it's not neat it's not beige or yellow or pink have you um never mind i'm not gonna get into that conversation uh how you been though man you uh you got your little he's gonna legitimately hate that he's gonna be like that conversation uh how you been though man you uh you got your little he's gonna legitimately hate that he's gonna be like that's not funny the sulfur stuff is funny the other stuff is just like just gross i mean i'm pretty sure that that's grounds for for a defamation lawsuit if barry and we talked if he wanted to right why it's true and we have photo evidence he

sues us and video evidence so we have to like fake evidence so we really have to come in a fishbowl and like take get like a hacker to reroute the picture so they really come from his number look see um but you've been doing a little vroom v vroom, vroom.

I have been. I came and visited you at the office. Scared the fucking shit out of me, dude. I know. You locked all the doors. I was proud. Yeah, because I'm here at night by myself. Yeah, and I'm happy to know that you look out for yourself.

One of the doors was open, though, in the back. Still couldn't get in, thankfully. Okay, because I... So, what was it, 1 it 1 a.m no i came at like 10 okay so it's like it's you know it's nighttime at the office and it's the 19th of april and i am sitting there editing uh super monkey bong and i'm in the zone and all of a sudden i just hear the office door like violently try to be opened uh like the back door of all things. And I just I think I just opened and closed it. OK, you did.

You did. You open and closed it. And that's why I heard it shut. So I froze and I was like, someone's in the office because I know I know what I heard. I know that I heard the door open and close. And I was just like, hello? Nothing. And outside the editing room door, it's just dark,

just dark hallways. And I was like, hello? And I started trying to be funny, like in case there was an intruder. So maybe they'd like go easy on me because like, oh, he's nice.

I was like, show yourself intruder. And I was shirtless and I had a butter knife on my desk it's a pretty sharp butter knife dude it's not sharp it's very dull you could poke someone with it yeah it would break but if someone's breaking in to kill me they're gonna also have something better than a butter knife probably a gun i put the butter knife in my pocket and i slowly crept into the hallway and it's dark and i'm looking at the door where i heard the door closing open and i was like

and i already left at this point because i was like, oh, I can't get in because there's like another door that I couldn't get through to get in. Yeah. And then, so I'm going back to the front now. I hear the doorbell ring and I like froze

and I was like, what the fuck? What the fuck? And I was so scared. It's like you're surrounded. There's someone in the back. There's someone in the front. And I crept to the front door

and I slowly opened it and you saw how long it took me to register it was you. You were just looking into my eyes because you had squinting you had your bike helmet on and i could only see your eyes and you didn't look like you you looked like a guy i knew from high school and you're like hey dude and my first thought was it was him and i was like i was just looking because i was genuinely confused i couldn't figure out who you were i was like oh hey i realized i realized realized and you had ridden your bike to the office

it's crazy that you wheelied the whole way here I know it was hard I only have you know I usually have a GoPro

but I was just filming it was just the sky the whole time and I like that picture you put on Instagram that you took where you were riding

pulled your cell phone out and you were taking pictures dude people like there are people, like, there are some people I think who legitimately thought that, like, I was, like, I just loved the picture.

I loved the picture, the image of, like, you know, the right hand on throttle, and then my left hand just, like, doing that classic, like, holding an iPhone, taking a picture. Like, your hand does the crab claw thing. Because Ryan posted a picture of like first person view of of riding down the street at night on his bike in la and people were like why are you using your phone and i just love the idea of like you literally just drive one hand instagram's gonna

love that and i'm like and like as i'm going around i'm like i'm like putting filters on it and like changing the brightness and contrast. We're through Instagram's Jakarta filter. Trying to find the motorcycle-y emoji. Blowing through red lights. Blowing through train tracks that have the guardrails down because a train's coming. No, I have a helmet cam set up. So I usually, you know,

you can just have a screenshot. If someone kills me, I think, I think my friends would at least like the, see the boom. You know, Justin's adding cartoon sound effects to that. And we're uploading it.

Dude. Like imagine if like there's a, there's a crash, you know, I have, I'm in the hospital. I hit my noggin. Maybe I'm out for a few days and you guys get to see what happened.

There's not like, whoa, you get to take the little SD card and go, whoa. If that ever does. That's awesome. If that happens, the version I will show you, like when you're finally awake. Please edit it. Will be edited. So it has cartoon sounds. Let's see that again.

Like slow motion. You have to try to submit it with your sound effects to Rob Dyrdek. Ridiculousness. So we got this video this week and this one is nuts. So this guy had a little spill on his bike, but listen to the sounds it made. He just thinks it's real. And I'm just. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! You look down like your bone is through your leg. And you're like grabbing the bone, trying to put it back in. I'd like to see that. You know, we need a website like... I rode my bike today. Yeah, you rode your bike to the office. I'd like to see that you know we need a website like I rode my bike today yeah you rode your bike to the office

you know what we don't have enough of is you know there's those shock websites like best gore which doesn't even exist anymore it got permanently removed live leak is still up yeah live leak will always be there but we need a website like live leak your best gore to fill the hole that's been left with gore videos.

But they're all edited with cartoon bonks and cartoon sound effects. So you don't feel as inhuman when you're watching them. Yeah. I mean, I can put a cartoon sound effect right before these ad reads. Oh, OK. Hi, do you have guided tours today? Yes, of course. We have today at 10.30, 11.30, 12.30, 1.30, 2.30, 3.30. Imagine having Europe all to yourself during the Air Transat off-season promo. Book your flights to Europe starting at $549 at airtransat.com.

Conditions apply. Air Transat. Travel moves us. Hi, can I take your order, please? Can I get a Big Mac, McRab, McFlurry, and a McDouble? Keep it rare, I need a Happy Meal, McCrispy, and 10 McNuggets. Tasty golden fries, a cold drink with extra ice. Join your chicken whoopie fire and a sweet hot apple pie.

Is that it? Let me get a quarter pounder with cheese, a flatfish show, please. Make good as a McMuffin and a large coffee. A hamburger, cheeseburger, hodgepodge, hotcakes. Vanilla cone shake and a hot bar sundae. Ba-da-ba-ba-ba. Whoa, what are you listening to this for? Wait, who's talking?

You know you're driving a 2024 Ford Escape with available Alexa built-in, so you can change the music. Oh yeah, Alexa, change station to 99.2. See? Purchase a 2024 Escape ST-Line all-wheel drive with Tech Pack at 3.49% APR for 72 months with down payment. That's just $267 bi-weekly. Cash value of $40,294. Plus, eligible Ford owners get a $1,000 bonus. For details, visit your local Ford store or Ford.ca. And we're back.

Again. It looks like it's going to rain. I hope not. That would suck. It's just been overcast all day. I looked at the weather. There's been no chance of rain. Really? Because it is. It's just been overcast all day. I looked at the weather. There's been no chance of rain. Really?

Because it's cool outside. Well, that was where I live, in Beverly Hills. Let me see where the office is on Malibu. Let me check. Let's see. Today, there is no... Wednesday, I don't see any... Yeah, there's no chance.

Monday, there's a 40% chance of rain. Really? Because on my app, Monday has an 85% chance. Oh, now it just went up to 50. Sunday has a 45% chance. I'm using the Apple Weather app or whatever. Oh, I'm using Hello Weather. Is that better?

I love it. It just has all these other features. And you can look at the radars. And it's cute. And it's got good. It's got great. Like, look And you can look at the radars, and it's cute, and it's got good... It's got great... Like, look, you can look at the radar. You can...

I feel like Apple's creepy, so I trust their... Look at this. You can look at all this info you can't see on the Apple thing about, like, UV levels, sunrise, pressure. You know, currently it's 1,011 millibars and falling. Fair conditions. Humidity 61%, dew points 46 degrees, and it feels dry. Four mile per hour winds from the southeast. Visibility

10 plus miles. Grab sunglasses. That's what it says, even though it's cloudy. But some say you can get even more sunburned in overcast weather because the way the clouds filter the UV light will toast you to a crisp. Is there any more meth in this?

No, I don't know. Maybe. No more meth. Damn. We'll have to go get some more soon that's what the Patreon money goes to that is true that and all my bikes yeah which ones you ride here today?

uh which one I rode today? is that a Ducati? no that's the that's the I don't know it's the... No, that's the... That's the... I don't know. It's the custom.

I bought it. It's the one that... It's the one that Christopher Nolan used in Dark Knight. Oh. Oh, okay. I thought it looked pretty cool. Yeah. And you also got the...

And I can flip around in it too. But I saw you replaced some of the... You took some of the metal off and replaced it with ivory. Yeah. That is a cool fucking look. That's a lot of ivory too. That took a lot of ivory of the, you took some of the metal off and replaced it with ivory. Yeah. That is a cool fucking look. That's a lot of ivory too. That took a lot of ivory for the amount you put on. And it's crazy that you got the Tesla bike engine early to put in that as well.

Love it, man. It looks great. Thanks, man. It's awesome. Still have not seen The Dark Knight. Really? I've only seen one of them and it's the one with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and the bomb that's the last one

I saw that in theaters I had no fucking clue what was going on but I liked it that's the one with Bane right? where Bane has the big blow up device perhaps he's wondering why you would shoot a man before throwing him out of a plane you know that one? yep

they're expecting two of us in the wreckage, brother. Yep. He says it just like that. And then they take the bomb out to sea and blow it up. And that's the ending of the movie. And then he looks at Jives. What's his name?

Jeeves? Who's the butler? Alfred. Alfred. He sees him in a cafe at the end, right? And he's like, he gives him a little nod. I remember that.

Jeeves, man. Why'd they fucking get rid of Jeeves? Who? In Batman? No, ask Jeeves. Oh, ask Jeeves? It's not ask. Isn't it just ask? Yeah, they got rid of Jeeves.

They killed him off. That's canon. They killed him. Is it canon that they killed him? He was in South America on a tourist trip and was executed by a drug cartel. Jesus. He ventured into the wrong, he was hiking and went somewhere

where they said, don't go in this area. He did and he was executed. There are horror stories that will pop up every now and then of like a big, because usually when it happens, it's a big event because it tends to not happen all the time.

But like when a, say like a European tourist or it's always European. I know it's, it's always European hikers, European hiker missing in Peru. And, and they either run into something that I think, uh,

like, where was the last one? I think the last one was somewhere in the middle East or something where it's like these, uh, like the two girls that went hiking. There's one that's about two European girls that went hiking in, I think, Peru. And they got, there's a really scary video on it.

I don't know if Nexpo did it or Horror Stories did it. But it's like these two girls from, I think, Denmark or Sweden. And they went to, I think, Peru. And they went hiking and they didn't come back uh one night so like the host family called the police and they couldn't find them for like 10 days but they found this one of the cell phones and they had like the pings of the cell phones and they had tried calling for help like a bunch and then turn the phone off and then would turn it on every few hours to try to call for help again and um they found the cell phone and it's really scary because like the last pictures on it are

just like pictures of them of like just deep in the wood well it's pictures of them like having fun first and it's pictures like deep in the forest and the jungle like uh where they don't know why they're taking pictures but the last picture is just taken at like 1 a.m in the middle of the jungle with like the flashlight going off and like a bunch of like shakiness and like a bunch of vines and shit. Jesus. Yeah. And it's terrifying. And one of the theories, there's a couple flash pictures in the dark that are terrifying looking.

And one of the theories was that they were doing that to like see their way because they didn't want to use the flashlight. But they could do that. Yeah. And then they found they found a boot with a foot in it and uh their belongings but they found their belong like their clothes like folded up on a rock near a river so they were hypothesizing that maybe like one of them like fell and got hurt the other one tried to help them got hurt too i mean when they got out they couldn't find their way back fully or really scary though or uh they they got uh they got kidnapped or killed that shit's

terrifying to me like being in the jungle and oh yeah because if you if you get lost somewhere like the amazon you're not daniel radcliffe had had a had a movie i think called and what was it called jungle i saw the trailer for that yeah yeah yeah yeah was it just called jungle i'm gonna look it up jungle great jungle cruise yeah okay uh jungle a group of friends join a guide for a trek into the bolivian jungle searching for an indian village the men soon realize though that the jungle is a difficult place to be. What a very bland description for this movie. Let me guess. There's bugs.

There's snakes. There's airplanes crashing. It's always a, when I like the show naked and afraid a lot, where it's just two people get naked and then have to go out into horrible wilderness for three weeks and have to get to an extraction point and survive all on their own. And they're naked the whole time. And it looks miserable.

It's a great show. But, like, the ones that look the absolute worst are when they send them into, like, the South American or, like, Central American rainforest. Which is literally, like, there's ones where they send them into, like, the Texas desert. And that looks awful. And they send them to like the Texas desert and that looks awful. And they send them to like African plains. The one I would just at least want to do is the rainforest and the jungle though because like the bugs and it's wet. And there's so many fucking like deadly things there like spiders and snakes and frogs and like cheetahs and leopards and shit and alligators. It's like, bro, I don't want to go to the jungle.

The bugs look like the worst part. As a kid though, like I've had my foot on that shark and I don't want to go to the jungle the bugs look like the worst part as a kid though like I've had my foot on that shark and I didn't realize it yeah when you were a kid

you put your foot on that shark no I'm talking about like right now there's the shark on the table yeah we have a shark in a bag

preserved in formaldehyde that one of you guys I have to reiterate because you pull it off from what I said and I have to like reiterate like we have a shark

on the table for some reason I'm gonna take that off the table I don, and I have to reiterate what I was actually talking about. We have a shark on the table for some reason. I'm going to take that off the table. I don't like this preserved shark. It's freaky, man. But as a kid, I remember being like, oh, I would love to go to the jungle and be in the trees. Because you remember what is it?

The pages in your science textbook that would be the different layers of a rainforest and have the animals. I want to be up exactly now you'd fall to your death real fast then like all the different colored frogs and you'd be like whoa then you go to the library and look up just like books about just about frogs or amphibians and i got books about poison dart frogs yeah i actually i actually ate my amphibian for the first time the other day i had frog legs for the first time oh really day. I had frog legs for the first time. Oh, really?

Have you ever had frog legs? Mm-hmm. Pretty good. It honestly just tasted like chicken. Yeah, that's what everyone said. I mean, it essentially. It was like a little mushier, but it was like very. It's a little more fair.

Very consistent. Yeah, it was like, it was a little less flavorful, but very consistent with chicken. In fact, if you gave it to me and told me it was chicken, I probably would have just not thought twice. It just bothers me because I don't like the thought of eating a frog. Yeah, the thought of eating an amphibian feels gross. Damn, dude. I wish humans were amphibians. Just go breathe underwater.

Grow some gills. Go to the year 3000. Oh, shit. You know? Not much has changed, but I'll live underwater. We could eat tadpoles. I wonder what eating a tadpole would be like. underwater. We could eat tadpoles. I wonder what eating a tadpole would be. Like a cup full of tadpoles.

Like boba. Imagine having tadpoles just swimming around in your boba tea. That sounds like some crazy LA thing. I see a Buzzfeed article about it. It's like, millennials are drinking tadpoles. Like some stupid shit. And it would be like 40 bucks per serving. but it's you know it's good for you it's like all the charcoal ice cream places in la now doesn't it just like turn

your mouth and like tongue and teeth black pure black yeah i i want to try it but it's like i don't know for something about like ice cream that's pitch black with a pitch black cone and like it just makes your lips and teeth and tongue fully black just feels a little bit like stupid like eat like black food never like black gray black and gray food never feel that right to eat it always feels a little like because your body's conditioned to seeing like uh it is burnt when it comes to food like what what food what food is just like pitch black besides caviar? Black beans. Okay, black. All right.

Okay, you got me on that one. Licorice. I'm going on an all black diet. It's just licorice and black beans for me, baby. Licorice and black bean soup. That's probably pretty good because licorice is made with anise. And that's a spice. And, you know, beans are great with spices.

I wonder what that would be like. Just little bits of licorice. You'd just be eating Twizzlers all day. They don't make black Twizzlers, do they? No. Because those aren't very popular. Just like black licorice is not very popular. I do like it. That's why Good & Plenty's are white and pink.

I like Good & Plenty's. Yeah. They're good and plenty. I do like black licorice. I wouldn't like, it's not my first choice and I wouldn't like sit down and really go to town on it. But like, it's one of those things like if it's there, I'll be like, oh shit, I'll have a, I'll have a couple of Good and Plennies, but I'm never going to go buy them.

Well, Good and Plennies are good too. You've got that candy coating. So it kind of dampens the, the harsh taste of black licorice. My mom, like whenever we went to the movies with her, it was either Twizzlers or Good and Plenty's. It's because she likes something to chew on. Like candy when she's watching her movie. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

I wasn't making a joke. I'm serious. Because she likes something to chew on. No, I was just, yeah. I've seen Nerds Ropes popping back up in stores. Good. Like a lot. They're one of the best candies ever I was at 7-11 the other day and they had them right by the counter when I was checking out

it was that and some incense it's like one of the things like after eating like nerds rope I'm not gonna go fucking have nerds ever again just get a nerds rope nerds are just a little too sweet for me now I guess I've just gotten older but nerds are just one of the candies I can't

really do anymore. It's just. You're probably just too mature for them now. Yeah. I mean. You've grown out of nerds. See, when I, when I was a kid, I would have loved candy. You know, when I was, when I was a 21 year old child.

I still enjoy candy. No, I love, I love, dude. Don't get me wrong. I love candy. I had some. I just can't eat it the way I used to. Except I get like the. I feel it now.

Almost the stepmom version of candy sometimes like I never get like just Reese's cups I'll get like Reese's thins you know like shit like that where it's like where it's like get Oreo thins it's like oh they're fewer calories for each one but it's like you're still eating fucking chocolate and just you'll probably eat

double the amount so it doesn't even make a difference but for me I think for I was like oh I think I it was like about getting less of it per because i didn't want to eat like a whole reese's cup and i kind of missed the flavor a little reese's thins are great so are reese's minis because like a like you want to you don't want it like so much i used to love just a regular reese's cup but now when i eat it like it makes my mouth hurt because it's just too much the texture but a thin a thin is just the right amount where it's like alright that's manageable. You remember

when they released like the big cups? Yeah. I remember having one as a even as a kid I like been in one I was like that's too much. I can't do Cadbury cream eggs because of that like they're just too the cream is just so fucking sweet it's like when I bite into it I'm like it's like what am I supposed

to suck the rest of the cream out it's like they're too much man ever just have a coconut as a snack I have yeah just go well I don't have the tools Jackson actually has a whole coconut tool set

of course he does it's on brand he has a coconut tool set you drink it and then you eat it eat the whole coconut once i was doing the dishes once and i found all these like golden tools and i was like what the fuck are these like these obscure looking golden like tools like a whole bunch of them just like a torture chamber yeah i was like what the fuck are these for and just oh it's from that's from my coconut kit and i was like oh of course he has a coconut plant. It's like a coconut with a little tree growing out of it. Oh, shit.

Apparently they're, like, impossible to grow, though. So, I hope he has it for, like, 20 years from now. So he just has this big-ass coconut tree. We have our dead bonsai trees or whatever the fuck those were. I think they're ginkgos. They're money trees. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they died, which is bad luck monetarily.

Is it? I think so. I'm pretty sure those are good luck for, like, money. I feel bad because that's a good luck for like money. I feel bad because that's a living thing that just. Yeah, there's two of those

in the office that died during COVID because we weren't coming in enough and they're just still sitting there just dead. I'll eat a salad in his memory.

Yeah, that's good. Put some, throw him some lettuce. I wonder if we can bring those back. Lettuce? No,

the trees, the money trees. Money trees. I wonder if we can bring those back. Lettuce? No, the trees. The money trees. Money trees. I wonder if we can bring them back. I wonder if it's too late. Oh, it's way too late. Think so? Think if I gave it a little water, a little kiss? No, they're dead dead. A little good and plenty? They're dead as fuck. If I cut that open, I'm not going to see any green? That's a corpse.

Jackson and I technically have a corpse. That's what he looks like? Yeah, Jackson looks, corpse looks like Jackson. I wouldn't be surprised. That's what he looks like? Yeah, Corpse looks like Jackson. I wouldn't be surprised. But much taller, like two feet taller than Jackson. Hey, baby girl. I bought plants this weekend. I bought a bunch of plants for my new place, and I love them so much.

I got a big fig tree. I got beautiful leaves. I got a dracaena. I'm learning about plants. I'm trying to learn how to take care of them because I love them so much. I got a big fig tree, got beautiful leaves. I got a Dracaena. I'm learning about plants. I'm trying to learn how to take care of them because I really like these plants. I don't want them to die. And plants are like a fun little hobby to get into, learn about them. And it's just like, it's a nice feeling. Like, you know, put some music on my place, like walk around my little watering can, water the plants. It feels good. I love how now when you leave town and instead of like, you know, like it's like i need to find someone to like look at look after lego for you it's going

to be i need someone to look after my plants hey you just need to go in there and i have cup set up you just need to water them you take them out to use the bathroom yep yeah well i had a big plant on top of my fridge and i stupidly the other the other night i was like oh pour some water in and I totally forget that it's going to drain out the bottom and I see water pouring all down the fridge.

I'm like, fuck. But I like plants and I had a really good idea for an app that someone's going to steal this idea now. It might already exist, but it's like a plant tracking app

where basically it's got a big catalog of plants and all the information about them and you pick your plants like that you have. And it tells you when you need them to be watered? Yeah, and it puts them in little virtual gardens and you see all your plants and you can name them and you pick your plants like that you have and it tells you when you need them to be watered yeah and it puts them a little virtual garden since you have plants you can name them and it will give you alerts on when to water each one for something like that like oh i'm

no i just thought of it it probably does exist but i bet you there has to be like a plant watering schedule like thing oh 100 i just like the idea of like like having your own little like gallery of your plants and it gives you little notifications you could set up specific ones about like oh put it in the sun take it out or like uh and maybe even the it's combined with a there's a part where you can find a plant watcher you can book a plant watcher i'm sure there's a plant watching app where people can come and water your plants for you here we'll look it up my mom messaged me omg look at this cutie and it it is oh it's pizza toru I love that little thing there's literally an app where it just like

you take pictures of a plant and it's like identifies it and shit really? picture this plant identifier identify worldwide plants red hibiscus or I guess you just look it up planta keep your plants

keep your plants alive. They always have that very minimal. Smart reminders. It says water, misted, plant identification, my plants. Okay, that's literally exactly what I was just talking about. It has a little bar for them and everything. Okay, let me download that right now. See?

Sometimes you just got to look stuff up. Well, Sometimes you just gotta look stuff up. Well, I purposely didn't look it up because I just wanted to keep living with the idea that I came up with that. Really? Yeah. I was like, man, that's a good idea, Matt. That's a good idea. No one's ever thought of watering their plants before. Plant app.

What's the most plant? Oh, jeez, picture this. There's 25,000. What's the one you just Oh, geez, picture this. 325,000. What's the one you just had? 32,000 favorites. Planta. Planta, the one with like the bars? Mm-hmm.

Oh, yeah, that one's big, bro. 320,000. Oh, wait. Oh,

there it is. There's also Blossom, 16,000. There's also, I don't know, Terrarium's just a game. Terraria? I love Terraria,

dude. It's so much fun. That's's why like one of my favorite like i'll try to look up apps like if i get interested into something for a little bit and that's why like uh one of my favorite apps is uh this isn't even an ad but like is uh it's called seven i introduced it to you yeah seven where it's just just like a bunch of cataloged workouts, and you just set your phone up, and you just do them. You say what's in the box. It's so easy.

I don't have to plan out a workout. So I just got Planta, and it's asking me my skill level with plants. Okay, commitment level. I'll put medium. I kind of like plants, and I think it would be all right to spend some time on them. Your location. All right. My address is...

Go ahead and say that out loud. Okay. Approve notifications. Skip for now. Create an account. All right. Dude, okay. I can have my first plants.

I also got some for outside. I got a bunch. I got like nine or ten plants. Dude, plants completely change the energy of a room no i was i was completely they remembered your you when i was thinking of like i was asking you like advice on like what like because i i just they weren't coming like nothing was coming to me besides pictures and like decorative stuff i'm like how can i kind of like liven up my place a little bit and you not fake your first thing was just plants and i like i thought about it i'm like how can i kind of like liven up my place a little bit and you not fake your first

thing was just plants and i like i thought about it i was like fuck you're 100 you get some like cool planter like some cool colored pots that match your walls or your furniture whatever um because it maybe it's placebo but it just makes the air in the room feel fresher like it feels like uh just the energy feels different having plants and fake plants don't cut it. Like fake plants, it doesn't have that same feeling. Having like a real living, breathing plant in the room,

it's like, you know, it's absorbing all those toxins. When I'm smoking three cigarettes at once in my apartment. Exactly. It's absorbing all that shit and spitting back out fresh air. The diet of an artist.

Yeah, exactly. Coffee and cigarettes. The ballet diet. It's great though, man. And like like plants are we should go plant shopping soon why is life so difficult for me i would love to take you plant shopping okay there's a lot of la has a bunch of great plant shop there's a lot of actually just get on the side of the street people selling plants uh i'll just buy a bunch of like flowers yeah all the people at the stoplights

that are selling flowers just always just hey just get some just a bouquet yep i always have a fresh bouquet i'll take you to some cool plant shops though my favorite plant shop just closed what yeah it was like out of the blue or yeah oh it must be because of covid but also where it's located it's uh i imagine the the property the street it's on, the property might be, they probably don't make enough just selling plants. Yeah. Because they had some very, very reasonably priced plants. And a lot of plant stores around LA are really expensive because they're like really nice

plants, but like the kind of mom and pop plant shops sell them for a lot cheaper. And yeah, plants can get expensive, man. Like hundreds of dollars for like one plant sometimes. I did get a nice really big fig tree. That's like, I love fig trees. It's my favorite. They're the one, the leaves like this big. And I remember it was a big deal for Jim when he just, when, I think it was a big deal

for both Jim and my mom, you know, they, they put up like a palm tree. They decided to buy a palm tree and put it like in our kind of like in our yard. It looks, it's still there. I think. I don't know. Mom, did you chop it down with a big ax? With your big hairy arms, muscular, hairy, oiled up arms.

They are hairy. And muscular. She chopped down Jim's cherry tree. She can lift a boat out of water if she wanted to. While she's swimming and can't touch. Yep. It's really actually insane. I bought this other plant I really, really liked.

Where did I? I saw it at a, I went to a farmer's market on Sunday and I saw it and I was like, I want that plant. I want that. And I don't know what it's called. It's so pretty though. It's like a little like wooden kind of stalk coming up and it has these dark green leaves that like all come off and there's three of them at different levels.

Like bamboo stalk looking type stuff? Not bamboo stalk. It's like I do want some bamboo. It's good luck. I don't know what type of plant it is but it's so nice. I love it. I love it i love it i love it i love it feel bad for all the people around the world who come home and their dog or cat has like knocked over a plant oh my god all on the floor this time last year i was fostering those

kittens and there was did they knock over there was only one it was was the gray and white and black snowshoe Siamese kitten, Gertie. She was real little. And she was the only one that would do it. She would just get inside the plants and kick out all the dirt and bite the leaves off and always knock them over all the way. So we'd come home and there'd be three plants sideways, dirt everywhere. Hey, there is our leaf-blowing friend. He's telling us to hey come on wrap it up wrap up the podcast

come on guys I gotta do my job cause he can't do his job when we're recording cause we actually had someone threaten his family over it he doesn't know it was us but we had someone say like if these guys if you can hear them recording like always go peek in the windows and if they're recording if you even turn on that leaf blower something really bad's gonna happen to your

wife and newborn son which unfortunately we used their uh their names oh we oh we had pictures of them too so uh unfortunately that will have to happen now because he has the leaf blower going but that's kind of just uh that's the cost of business it is what it is you gotta do that that is that's life you have to make hard business decisions sometimes when you run a business love that leaf leaf blower. That's sarcasm. That you love him? That I love the leaf blower. Because it's not sarcasm about the stuff with his family. That's going to be very...

When he gets home today, he's going to have a very painful afternoon. But hopefully he'll come back the next week and learn from his mistakes. I have to take a urine. Right now? I have to take a piss really bad. Okay.

Well, since he's going off. He couldn't have just waited like a minute. No. Wow, he is in for it then. All right, guys. Well, thank you so much for listening. We got some more good videos coming up on the way. Excited about it.

One with a two man. Twomod. And it's way. Excited about it. One with a two-mad. Two-mad. And it's gross. It's really gross. If you have a problem with vomit, don't watch the one we're releasing with two-mad. We're going to censor it for the YouTube version. Not the Patreon version, but... Patreon gets to see all the glory.

You shouldn't actually be able to see or hear the vomit in the YouTube one, but it's still gross. Okay. It's gross. Or hear it. Mm-hmm. Do you have to censor it like... Beep YouTube one, but it's still gross. It's gross. Or hear it? Do you have to censor it like, beep? No, just put a sound effect over it. That's what other people I've seen. Max and Chad did that. I think it's

kind of good courtesy, too, because people don't usually like seeing vomit. Or hearing it like, blech. Hearing it is debatably worse than seeing it. Yeah. Because the thing is... I was vomiting really hard I think seeing everyone vomit

was like it's it was almost like a domino effect as soon as one person vomited it just kind of was like it was easier for the other people

too mad and then after too mad dude I was like uh oh but also well it's because we were doing the milk gallon challenge and um

it kind of just hit all at once like I had chugged a lot and I didn't really feel full, but then all of a sudden, like a couple minutes later, it was just like, all right, let's get this out.

And it did. And I did. And I got, I got it out for me. It was like, I watched the video from, it was like, what?

It's good. It's because it starts to expand in your stomach after a few minutes. Did you watch the video of you throwing up? It is. I'll show you after this. It is. It's, it's, it's, I actually didn't know Justin was going to, uh, did you watch the video of you throwing up it is I'll show you after this it is it's I actually didn't know Justin was gonna

leave in that one drunk drawing when I projectile puke and Carson like film in with the bathroom door and I watched it and I was like Jesus oh because it's intense so apologies if I trigger anyone with that

I know it just kind of like went up like I felt like okay then I started putting some down then I realized like the milk was just kind of like staying because your stomach can't hold that much milk i was like okay i'm yours with your yours your uh release was great and the most aesthetically oh did you watch that uh i watched it when i was next to you i i could i

didn't find the clip carson got a really good angle where you got a lot of blue coming out of your nose. But yours was very aesthetic. So was Tumat's. Mine was kind of just like, oh, God. Mine was fast and violent, and then y'all had a more drawn-out, colorful experience. Tumat was not having fun. No. Did you watch the Cinnamon Challenge, too?

No, I just watched the puke part. I just skipped to it. I'll show you after this, though. All right, guys. Well, love you and have a good day. We'll see y'all next week. See you for 242. And also throughout because we put stuff usually. Bye.

Do you? No. I bet you're going to end it with a fart sound again. Yeah, right. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because, you know, if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality,

it can be hard just to know where to start. But now, all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience, and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app, answer a few questions and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly, which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I dot com.