supermegashow - EP 259 - The Dang Butterfly Effect

Episode Date: August 25, 2021

We talk epic video games, the epic butterfly effect and epic Yoohoo! To get your new wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, and get the plan shipped to your door for FREE, go to MintMobile.com/SUPERMEGA. As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at BetterHelp.com/supermega Go to Curology.com/SUPER for a free 30-day trial, just pay for shipping and handling!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because, you know, if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now, all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience, and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app, answer a few questions, and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish.

Or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly. Which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps. Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I.com. Welcome to episode 259 of the Super Megacast, everyone. Yippee-i-o. Yippee-i-o. That is incredible. Every week, we're just knocking it out of the Super Megacast, everyone. Woo! Yippee-i-yo. Yippee-i-yo. That is incredible.

You know? Every week, we're just knocking it out of the park. Climbing the ladder higher and higher. Yeah. We're actually the number, well, we're the number zero podcast because we went so far above the top spot of one that now we're like, it's this cool new kind of place. They put the greatest podcast and the most listened to podcast and the most interesting podcast.

And don't think that zero means that it's like bad. Zero is actually before one. Yeah. So it's like before all of creation. This is like the foundation of what every podcast is built from is the super mega cast. Sorry, Joe Rogan. We knocked him down to, I think, 98.

Yeah. But now it feels good being on top, baby. feels pretty pretty damn good it's a permanent spot too so so thank you so much to everyone who's listening for for getting us to number zero on the charts yep such an honor and um i'm just so excited to see what else we can accomplish and i'm glad that spotify gave us joe rogan's deal you know Rogan's deal. You know, that was a lot. That was a lot of money. I haven't even seen how much is in my bank account now, dude. It's probably like 20, 30 million.

There's some zeros in there. A couple extra zeros, you know. Oh, yeah. But that's pretty epic. How you been, Ryan? I've been alright. Justin just left town. He has. But he will be back eventually very soon even though those two words and eventually very soon doesn't sound like

they go together too well but yeah he is coming back soon justin's coming baby yeah and we're gonna record more sonic sonic heroes right yep and we And we just finished. Which he did not seem excited about. No. But we just finished. And he didn't like Adventure 2. I liked it. I liked watching it. Yeah. We just did the dark, because we did the Heroes story and that's on YouTube, me, Ryan, and Justin. And then now we just

recorded all the dark story plus the third ending, the canonical ending. And that'll be like nine or ten episodes and that's coming out at the beginning of september so keep your eyes peeled it's very fun i thought the very funny episodes but uh yeah since he's i since he left i've been i'm playing the new ratchet and clank rift in time oh which is very really good it's got really like it's's got the sexy one. I really liked it. It's so fun. The sexy girl in it. Yeah, it does. Yeah.

Woo! Talking about the yellow robot? Yeah. No, is she a robot? One of them is. She's like an animal? One of the new characters is. Yeah.

Sexy as fuck. The robot. Yeah. Okay. That's fine. I'm robo-sexual. You know? You know what I'm saying?

She is pretty thick. Well, she gets thick, but I don't want to spoil too much. Thick with two Cs? Hell yeah. Like the meme way of spelling it? Oh, yeah. I recommend the game. Very fun.

I'm getting my ass kicked in Demon's Souls. Ooh. I just told Matt I worked my way, like 30, 45 minutes of getting through this level to be like stabbed by seven different enemies that hopped out of like a corner or some shit and uh so now i'm at back at the beginning so i had to just pause and i'm like i'll just do it again later god damn it's very defeating but that's the whole point yeah you know what i'm saying so then when you overcome it it's even more of a reward but like that's that's the biggest thing nothing makes me feel more discouraged i'm just like i'm turning it off right now then when i get far in a game and

i die and i have to restart i'm like i'm just not i'll do this later I'm just like, I'm turning it off right now. Then when I get far in a game and I die and I have to restart, I'm like, I'm just not, I'll do this later. I'm doing this later. I'm not doing it again right now. I have to like rebuild my energy for it. But I guess that's like the draw to like the Demon's Souls specifically. But that's why I also really like Sekiro because the Buddhist statues are very forgiving in terms of checkpoints. Like you have multiple throughout a level whereas usually i'm guessing in like the dark souls or demon souls games or

just the souls born games they're like a lot less frequent yeah like checkpoints so i played a little bit of i played like half of bloodborne maybe i'd like to try demon souls but i just know that i don't think that's a game that I'd be any good at I can't play fucking Sonic or something dude I'm not gonna be able to play Demon's Souls it's a rough one cause sometimes like if you go in there as a beginner and you're just kind of like

not not even if you're not on your toes they just set you up to fail so it's like haha you died but now you know what's gonna happen if you do this like you'll be walking up some steps and all of a sudden a giant boulder comes barreling towards you at high speed and you're like and your character runs like very slowly or like is very slow and i didn't so you're trying to run down the stairs but you have like no time to get out of the way but then you learn later that you can just activate it then run your ass

down trial and error yeah but then you start from that you can just activate it then run your ass down trial and error yeah but then you start from the very beginning again oh see that's so frustrating but but i imagine when you do death like that when you beat bosses and shit it's got to be the best feeling i haven't beaten a boss yet i haven't even beaten one boss yet all right rhino hazard okay whatever dude i thought you were good at video games i was almost to the boss i think i passed a lot of shit helped this dude out that was like help me help me dude then i then i helped him and then he just roamed around this area for no reason i was like oh he gave me like an item or something nice yeah dude that's kind of like uh a little dude asking me for help last night um dude asked you for help yeah little tiny dude about two feet tall no i went to round one

last night um and there was a guy that works there uh with like very long like blue hair and i when i came in i saw him sitting at the bar i guess he was off the clock but he was absolutely obliterated just drunk yeah like like you, when you see some people, you're like, oh my God, that person's drunk. Yeah. And he kept drinking. And then one time we made eye contact and he flipped off the whole room of people like sitting down eating. And I was like, I do this dude.

And he looked at some girl that was sitting by herself. He's like, we should totally make out. And he had long blue hair and he worked at round one. Yeah. He had a round one uniform on. But, you know, I was like, oh man, I don't want to do with someone like that. End of the night, I go to walk back to my car. Guess who is sitting crumpled up against my car in the parking lot?

Yeah. Just sitting up against my car just like with his head in his hands. Just by chance? Just by chance. Like he couldn't walk or anything and he was up against my car. And I was like, God damn it. I don't want to. I just started setting off my car alarm from far away to see if he'd get up.

I did it for about six minutes. He didn't move. Really? Yeah. Finally, I just walked over and he got up and stumbled away. As I'm getting in my car. As you were walking over. Yeah.

As I'm getting in my car, I my car i just go anybody got a cigarette what the f and i just got and drove away it was weird jesus dude like how young was this dude or was he like an older guy with long blue hair like he'd be like 22 23 oh gee okay just somewhere in the 20s it's either like you know he could be like 29 age as well or you know just like 24 something something like that i had another awkward experience this week i was about to say that's not the one that you were no referencing because we were recording a video and you said you wanted to save a certain story for the podcast and so i i've been lying in wait waiting for matt to tell this story and i'm excited as should all of you be yeah so saturday i uh was at the glendale

galleria the americana the outdoor you know nice little like park area it has like restaurants and movie theater factory so i went to like a little italian deli to get lunch and i got a sandwich and uh you know i'm sitting outside and one thing that the americana always has every time i go it's like a guarantee is they always have like there's people walking around really cute pomeranians like i always see cute pomeranians and i love you step on a pomeranian no i love pomeranians so much i'm trying to guess one of my favorite dogs is a pomeranian yeah um did it bite you? No, no, no. I was sitting there enjoying my lunch, and there's a table like 10 feet away from me,

and there's two Husky Pomeranian mixes sitting under. What does that look like? Husky Pomeranian. Interesting. Are they still like medium-sized dogs? Yeah, they're still pretty small. They have like a husky-ish face, but they're sitting by the owner's chair, and they're still pretty small they have like a huskiest huskish face but you know they're sitting by the owner's chair uh and they're really really cute and i'm like oh my god those are

beautiful dogs they look like that uh no not that cute that like this no they didn't look that cute hmm so they're just ugly well i took a picture to send my friend because she also loves pomeranians so we'll send pictures when we see like a really good one in public oh you took a picture and she didn't like the fact you took a picture of her dogs no i i sat there and i was like just i zoomed in i started i snapped like three or four pictures were they near where she was sitting yeah near where she was sitting but i was zooming on the dogs yes and uh but it looks like your camera is pointing at you but then she like looks at me

and stares at me and makes eye contact and then I realized she was breastfeeding oh wait did you tweet about this I did yeah yeah that's what I thought I saw you tweet about then I realized she was breastfeeding and I was like oh fuck fuck

like it literally looks like I'm just sitting there taking pictures of a woman breastfeeding in public. I know, I know. And she looks at me and stares at me and I look away and I'm, like, trying to, like, act natural. Were you with anyone? I was with my friend Christian, yeah. He didn't know, though, because he had his back to her. But, you know, it's like... What was that anxiety like?

But I did that thing where, like... What was that anxiety like the moment... Oh, my heart dropped. And then, like, I did that thing where, like, I kind anxiety? Like the moment, Oh, my heart dropped. And then like, I, I, I did that thing where like, I kind of like scanning my eyes back like a minute later to,

and I contact again. I was like, Oh fuck. Yeah. And she, she immediately stopped breastfeeding and like took the baby out and like stop breastfeeding and stuff. Dude,

that's, that's fucked. That's I, that is, I'm physically cringing. Yeah. Dude, that's fucked. That is... I'm physically cringing. Yeah. Dude, that was cringe, bro.

She was sitting with a friend. So did the friend start looking at you too? No, but to play it off, I went back inside. And then when I walked out, I was like, Hey, are those Pomeranian Husky mixes? They're so cute. I've been obsessed with them. And then I asked their names and pet the dogs.

So it's like... Oh, did they seem nice once you did that yeah or were they still she still she didn't she didn't talk to me but her friend did oh was she still kind of like look like she didn't look like any kind of way she just didn't say anything um so i was like trying to like you know kind of show that i was really into the dogs not maybe she's like... Not those dogs, but... He was filming me while I was breastfeeding. Hey, baby, I wasn't trying to take a picture of those puppies. Yeah, but that was my great, awkward experience

this weekend. And when I realized, it was just like the worst feeling. It was like a Curb Your Enthusiasm moment. The only thing that would have made it better is if she was like, Hey, are you filming me breastfeeding like that would have really been a great experience that i'd always remember it would have made a better podcast no i was filming no i was filming the dogs but yeah you were and then she flashes her tits at me and she goes how do you like these these puppies and then you put out your phone and then you take another picture and it goes and she goes hey why'd you do that and you're

like public space honestly i think it should be illegal for women to breastfeed in public i think that that's it's disgusting i think that it's immoral and i think that as a society we should not let it happen we should shame and actually physically we should it is and we should physically hurt people that do it we should that's just my opinion so i think if you see like if you see a woman breastfeeding at the top of you know like a set of stairs or something you know what to do anyways yeah i mean it's just it's just disgusting that that women would do that in public like come on you think i want to see that i don't whip out my penis and and milk myself in public yeah so so they could they can do it but when i do when i when i do it i oh all of a sudden i'm in jail and i'm offending people come on double standards much

stupid i love people that like i love like the dudes that are like genuinely offended by women breastfeeding in public, like your dad. I don't know if my dad is, but it's a lot of older dudes. Your dad gets out the binoculars. Just a guy sitting in their binoculars, like five feet away from a woman. No, it's like... A ooga. A ooga.

Sir, get away from me. It's the same guys that'd be like, yeah, I wish I could see it. That woman's breasts. Oh she's oh nasty it's a way of keeping women down ryan they're trying to they're trying to keep them humble and they're trying to keep them that's that they that's something they should do in their bedroom with their baby yeah you know yeah so speaking of breastfeeding i'm you know 90 day fiance i'm watching there's a guy from nigeria i think i said this but i think i said this in, but he breastfed until he was nine. And he's he like willing he willingly gives that information.

And he's like, and I would suck on and play with the breasts. And that's why I like big boobs. And he said that's why he liked big boobs, because he would he would suck on and play with his mom's breast. That's so fucked. That's so fucked. Brian, are you seriously saying Nigeria's culture is fucked? Is that what you want to go with? No, I don't think that's even normal in Nigeria.

I don't think that, I think most people stop. Most cultures, I think, don't continue breastfeeding their child after it's like a young toddler. Yeah. Like, and I saw a video on Redditdit yesterday on like r slash that's insane where was a woman at a music festival uh spraying breast milk out of both her tits on people and like dancing around and spraying a lot of people like yeah yeah someone got down with come on dude and humans are fucked dude but that's why we're so epic. Dude, we want to build some shopping malls. Tear out a fucking forest.

Yeah, I mean, you could grow more trees. We need some concert space. Sorry, people with small one-story houses that can't afford to move. We need an awesome center here so we can host shows. With super mega live comms, where are they supposed to perform? Because we need the biggest arena. We don't have an arena big enough. Nope. We don't have a coliseum that can fit up to 100,000 people.

Madison Square Garden who? Exactly. Exactly. I just think that that's why we don't go to small towns because we don't want to overrun their humble little town with you know hundreds of thousands of of people it would break the economy and everything there they'd run

out of food would break the internet i can't believe that there was that uh that famous like freddie mercury aids concert how many people were there Was it over a million were in the audience? The one we watched a video of it at that bar in Japan. Remember that guy had it on? I mean he showed us his music video. The old Japanese guy he showed us his music video. Which I want to go back to that bar again. It was fun. I have no way to find it.

If I was in that little part of Tokyo I I'd recognize the street. I'd be able to because Shinjuku is so small. Well, actually it was out of Shinjuku. It was on like the back streets, but it was, yeah,

but it was still like, it was in the back streets, but it wasn't that far off into the back streets. It was still like, I remember it was just hard because it specifically wasn't, didn't have like a light up sign. It felt like it really felt like, like a,

like a place in Yakuza zero, like a little map only existed just in now it's's something else and we'll never see it again. Some other guys shopped. Well, you had to go up. Remember you had to go up the stairs to get up there? And it was the steepest, narrowest stair passageway. And like. There were touristy type people there already.

Yeah. When I showed up. So like I feel like it would be easy to find. He gave us the snake sake. It was like a. It was a jar of sake with like a huge dead snake in it. Like, not pickled, but like preserved by the alcohol. And we had some.

Interesting, interesting flavor. I had a dream about a snake last night. About a big snake. I've been having a lot of snake dreams. A lot of alligator dreams. Was it about your big snake? No. No.

I mean, that's what most women have dreams about now. But, you know, I really. Maybe it's because I saw a video of a big snake yesterday. So when I had a dream about it. But once again, I had a dream, the dream where it's the last day of high school. And I'm trying to clear out my locker and like get to my bus in time. And it's like the end of the day. And I'm like, wow, holy shit. But this time I was aware of my dreams in the past of this. And I was like, I'm so happy this is finally happening because I've

had so many dreams about this. I'm so happy that like this one's not a dream. And I'm finally my last day of high school and I got to go catch my bus. And this it's the first time I actually like fully secured like my backpack and I wasn't leaving anything behind and I felt good and I and you know I was walking and I I was like this can't be a dream nope it's not this is the real this is the real deal like I'm only I'm like I'm like it's finally it's finally happening I'm glad it's not that dream I keep having you like you imagined you imagined your your successes and stuff in LA and like you're just back here again and you're like okay I know what to do yeah well LA Well, LA didn't even exist. Like none of that existed. But like when you're thinking about your dream, you didn't think of like,

no, I only thought of like the present me in the present moment where I was. And I was like, I'm, you know, I finished high school. I can't believe I like, we're done. We did it guys. And I missed my, I couldn't find my bus. Uh, and I kept being like, it's awesome. This is finally happening. And this one's not that dream. And then I woke up and I't find my bus. And I kept being like, it's awesome. This is finally happening. And this one's not that dream. And then I woke up and I was like, oh, God, I will stop. Brain, stop giving me that fucking dream. It's annoying.

How accepting would you be? How accepting would you be if in the middle of a day, like you're just kind of like walking across the street and also you're just like your consciousness and everything is transported to like graduation, everyone around you. We did it did it we graduated today and like it just stayed there i would fucking hate that dude how like how i would absolutely hate that so much everyone good that i met in my life as an adult basically like everyone good i've met like as an adult all like some of the best experiences as an adult and it's like all they would that would they'd be gone i've thought about like how hard it would be like to just like try to make certain relationships happen again like friendships would you still have memories of of la and stuff or is it just boom

let's say you did let's say you did i'd try to find all the people that right yeah i try to find everyone doing that like would it you know hey so maybe in like a parallel universe we were boyfriend and girlfriend but um now i got transported back like this is how you get me back into super mega hey you're actually my husband in an alternate timeline you sound crazy like just like hey you know we actually slept together in a parallel universe so maybe like we said you'd be telling that again this is like high school math you'd be telling this to like post like just a year post high school ryan i'm talking to a girl not you but you're talking to though this is how you're getting me back into super mega i didn't say that i'm i'm talking to

ladies what i'm like hey yeah we end up having sex. You think about ladies? You don't think about your boys? Ryan, if I. Saving your boys? If I hit you up, you're not going to respond to me. You're going to be like, this crazy guy just messaged me saying that in a parallel universe, he just got transported from six years in the future and he's back in high school now and we're supposed to be, make a channel together on YouTube.

What would you do? You would ignore it. I would. Exactly. so i'd have to wait i would i'd probably just have to wait would you ever reach out to me to try to like be a like become my friend yeah would you be like yeah for sure i would try to um i think i'd probably just try my best to exactly replicate the path that i that i did send me send me pictures of my stepdad and my grandmother. But the problem is there's going to be like little bad things I remember along the way that I'm going to want to like change and

avoid because I'm like oh I have another chance but then changing those little things might completely you know change the future that I remember and then that future's all gone and I didn't meet these cool people because I did this small slight butterfly effect change you know that is like so it's like the bad shit has to happen if i think about it sometimes that's like the most terrifying aspect of that like thought exercise or whatever is like i would

just have to reconnect with everyone not only that but like i'm like just older like how much older would i feel like if i were to like go from 17 to 27 again you're going about a decade yeah yeah you know almost are you gonna go to your is your high school gonna have a 10-year reunion i don't know and if if i did go i just feel like i it would be very sad well i mean you showing up in in your Lamborghini with the suits and everything would be pretty cool. With a briefcase that has like- It would make everyone else look sad. You need to get like a prop briefcase that's like the sides are busting with money sticking out. And like it's like swelling up.

Hey, do you guys have a place I can put this? Do you guys have a bag check? A valet maybe? Where I can put my bags and they're just dropping $100. I do little magic tricks for the valets. Like, oh,

what's that? It's like a hundred dollar bill. Here's your tip. I love, dude, I love, that just reminded me of that one part in our book.

Oh yeah. I'm excited to work on the book some more. This week. We just, we're just. I keep remembering little moments that we wrote.

Like, cause honestly, what we need to do is we need to, before we start start working on it again sit down and read the whole thing out loud and change some stuff and rework it absolutely so I'm stoked man

we just need a day you and me smoking on some stogies oh yeah stogies absolutely I thought you were going to say illegal drugs no of course not some stogies I love stogies. Stogie is such a funny word.

You're not. If you do not smoke a stogie, what kind of man are you? Jackson has a grandpa. He calls Papa Cigar because Papa Stogie. He always has a big ass unlit stogie in his mouth. Always. And when he helped us move out of our college dorm, he just had it in the middle of his mouth and he'd like talk like it would just be bouncing up and

down and that's Papa Cigar he's always got a cigar that's how he feels comfortable he has an oral fixation it would just be wet creepy bastard I know I'm kidding it would be wet and just moist and none for me thank you you want to try this stogie Matthew

it's fucking like oatmeal texture, like soaking wet with spit. Oh. You know? I remember the first time I ever smoked a blunt. My friend rolled it. He didn't really. You didn't feel anything, right? No, that's the first time I did.

This is the first time I actually got high. Okay. It was like a backwoods that he emptied out. But then. Because you always explain it in two different areas where it's like the first time you got high, but the first time you smoked up. First time I smoked was when that kid from my high school came over on my back porch and I took a little hit because I felt awkward or not. And I called my mom afterwards. I was like, mom, I smoked marijuana.

And then the first time you got high. But I remember was, yeah, with my friend came over and I remember he was like licking the back backwoods to roll it back up to seal it. It was soggy. The whole thing was dripping wet with spit, I remember. I remember this story. It was a great backwoods. And we went outside in my cul-de-sac and smoked it. And then went inside and watched Neil deGgrasse tyson's cosmos on my tiny

little tv that was like a foot long and it was awesome i think i watched that with like daniel in high school or like first year of college or something like that what is space it was just we watched some cosmos they were like this is insane dude i love i love or maybe it was bill nye's because didn't he do a cosmos or some shit or some shit Or is Bill Nye in that one Or maybe it's the Carl Sagan one Those guys are cool I love space so much And there's a YouTube channel

I watched one of them I just can't remember There's a couple space YouTube channels I found There's one called Destiny Not the guy that debated JonTron on ethnostates and stuff But the It's just called Destiny And it's this the video game from bungie well he has a very deep voice british voice is like neptune has oceans of liquid diamonds and it's like really good graphics and it's awesome great channel oi can you believe that i like you

believe that oceans if they were to rise even one meter that it would cover almost the entirety of the world is that true no oh i don't think so i don't know that's a lot of water added but like i read a there's a lot of places a meter up from sea from sea level oh yeah what the fuck am i thinking or maybe the science of that it's like that's how much water is added and it shifts and goes in differently i don't know there's so much fucking water on it because then we're talking about like lakes over certain areas over flooding because some places are just like lowland areas or i mean 2030s it's supposed to happen like think about a meter up right now in charleston oh yeah like so so i mean the downtown area of charleston is below sea level

which is why it floods so much when there's a big storm people go kayaking yeah when i was a kid i remember i went like i don't know why the fuck my parents let me do this i just remember i got my bathing suit on i was like swimming in like street water like all day like like maybe like a foot and it's like spitting it out of your mouth and gargling it. It's fucking, like, ringworms swimming around and, like, parasites and, like... It was, like, orangey black. And just... I don't know why my mom's like, yeah, you can go swimming, Matthew, in the fucking chemical-ridden street water with parasites and, you know... That's probably where I got that jock itch.

Ugh. You ever had jock itch, bro? Yeah. Shit sucks balls. Yeah. It's a fungus. Yeah, I had it jock itch, bro? Yeah. Shit sucks balls. Yeah. It's a fungus. Yeah, I had it in high school. It's athlete's foot just on your crotch.

So it's funny because like athlete's foot jock itch and everywhere else, it's all the exact same thing, but it has a different name for like every single part of your body you get it on. It's like crabs and lice, right? Or no, those are, are those? Yeah, they're the same thing. Okay. I don't get how, I've said this before, dude.

I don't get why crabs are a problem Just shave your fucking nuts Just shave your fucking nuts And your pubis Shave your pussy hole And then you're good Like seriously Dude I got a bad

I got crabs I don't know what to do Just take a little tiny butane blowtorch down there Get them Spray some Windex on your crotch Let it sit got crabs i don't know what to do and just take a little tiny butane blowtorch down there get them yeah i just spray some windex on your crotch yeah let it sit dude you you have you ever had lice no you're lucky i got them in elementary school like fifth grade my sister and i got lice because there was like an outbreak at my school dandruff though very different lice of courseice suck. Yes, of course. Lice suck. And actually... And you feel gross when you have them.

I mean, knowing that you have bugs in your fucking hair. And you're just like... Crawling around in itches. And then fucking... On top of that, you can't sit on any furniture. So where do lice breed? In your hair. So animals...

They lay eggs on your scalp. So what makes them different from fleas they're just different creatures and lice stay in your hair fleas just bite you and then jump away fleas usually bite like they they stay attached to the source like they only jump out because we can't host them but like if they jump on your animal they usually stay for their lifetime well lice like to stay and nest in your hair and it's fucking awful. And I remember I was the shampoo like would not work like the special shampoo to kill them. And I was my mom was so close to I was going to have to shave my head. And as a fifth grader, I know I had that long, flippy Anthony Padilla hair.

See, as as a as an early 20 year old, it was fun and exciting because you're changing your appearance, like doing something that you have the full just ability to do without like worrying about the judgments or anything of like close family or friends. Right, right. And it was fun for a show. Right. But you said in fifth grade? Yeah. In fifth grade, that would be pretty traumatizing.

I mean, like that's- Because that's noticed. Like your classmates- Oh, yeah. That's going to set you aside real fast. Oh, yeah. Because as an adult, you shave your head. It's not like anyone's really going to treat you different.

But in, like, fifth grade, the social hierarchy of, like, schools, like, all of a sudden, you know, you are a target. You were, like, dude, you got your fucking, like, he's bald now. Yeah. I just knew that there were certain, like, there's certain stereotypes that a lot like if you if you were to shave your head you're like you're you're an asshole type of vibe that like that's why like a lot of people did like i don't know like the high and tight shaved head it's just like dude all the all the like rotc haircuts or like the military haircuts are so my i love the high and tight yeah i'll get a high and tight, please.

Sounds like a cocktail. Could you imagine if they made all the girls do it too? Why do men have to shave their head like that in the military? What's the point? If I as a dude were to put my hair up in a bun,

would that be fine? No, everyone has to get that haircut. Nuh-uh. Females's females don't well not females but femme males hmm well i'm sure that the army i'm sure the united states military is very accepting of those ideas and and would let you keep your long hair good um i'm glad that you uh that you uh propagate our military so well. Oh, I mean, we donate all the Patreon money to the military. Seven hundred fifty billion dollars a year isn't enough. Anyway, let's go to break. I have to piss.

Smads. Yeah. So we'll be right back. And stay gold, everyone. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because, you know, if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now, all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience, and they've combined it with new tools to simplify

the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app. Answer a few questions and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish. Or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly. Which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps. Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I dot com. FanDuel Casino's exclusive live dealer studio

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where winning is undefeated. 19 plus and physically located in Ontario. Gambling problem? Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca Please play responsibly. Ah, those smelly, smelly ad reads are out of the way. Oh my god, Please play responsibly. mic yeah it's not uh it it's not connected i feel like we've had this problem before i feel like i'm

living in like deja vu except like this i don't remember making this observation in a while it's not like this no it hasn't but the problem is i can't put it back on without unplugging the mic itself the yeah so i just gotta let so my mic is actually just hanging right now and i'm speaking into it yeah hanging from the arm that it's on. So it's wobbling very slowly. We should be good. Yeah. We should be good. That's all good.

Let me see if I can get a little bit closer to my... Damn. Damn, boy. Spinning around. There we go. I think that's good. Yeah. Yeah.

I love it. What? Nothing. Dude. What? Nothing. What have you been doing at home? Ch home chilling have you been working on any new music business okay yeah yeah i have been working on music oh so the moment i mentioned your music

now you want to fess up yeah and talk about okay no really i've been working on my place still like because i rearranged some rooms is that the name of the album my place still i basically like i've lived in my place since like april or may and it's just still not set up to how i want it so i've been like spending a lot of saturdays and stuff just waking up spending all day just cleaning or moving things around or just staring at the walls in anger yeah and shaking my face i'm trying to i'm finally putting some shit up on my walls. My bedroom, I just cleaned for the first time. And I put up a picture. I really wanted to be a white boy, so I put a Weezer poster on the back of my bedroom door.

The Green album. Nice. Yeah. So they'll go, oh, you're one of those guys. Weezer's sick. I'm seeing Weezer in like two weeks. It's like one of those where it's just like so i'm seeing weezer in like two weeks like one of those where it's just like so much nostalgia weezer is so nostalgic for me like all that all that the sound

and just all those songs first music video i ever saw was pork and beans i was at sunset beach at the time and for some reason it was on and i think it was on mtv or some shit but the music video played on the television oh dude i love that song and that video just because of the like that was the era of youtube that we started with so like seeing all of those like old youtube memes in that video it just takes me back to like when youtube was still so small and like uh we were like part of like that so it's it's cool i love come up remember remember how much you used to be able to customize your channel oh it was like a myspace page yeah and if you were uh a partner you could

have like a banner on like the side of your videos and you could customize it like crazy i spent so long trying to make custom like backgrounds you had to fill out this form or you had to like do something there was something you had to do in the setting so that you could actually put thumbnails on your video. That's right. So people that couldn't put custom thumbnails, they'd flash a frame at exactly like the third way point or something. So it would be like so like randomly in a video just flash like a woman with tits. And then just like, why is that?

Yeah, I remember. I wish I could have done custom thumbnails as a kid. There was so much. You couldn't upload over 10 minutes. Remember? Unless you were that, like, signed up for that thing, whatever. I don't know. I can't remember what it was called at the time.

I think it was just, was it partner? Probably. Partner? Okay, partner. Or are you a Twitch affiliate? I think it was partner, but. Are you partnered on Twitch, Matthew? That's all I wanted was to be a partner.

Now you've gotten it. The goal is met. Yeah, but then what? You could easily stream music shit. I've thought about streaming music because it would be really fun to do streams where I make a song on stream and I have to finish it.

Do you do some DJ shit? Except you'd have to be careful. That's why I would just do a stream where I have to make music. Because that won't get copyrighted. No. But I should do a stream where I make a rap song. I should do rap streams where they help me write it. You have to rap it live.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. That actually sounds like really fun streams. Because I don't like playing games that much in front of people, so that's kind of why I don't stream that much. But making music sounds pretty sweet. I have a cool setup for streaming. I just have to set it up.

Like, I have a cool place. The desk I got and the room, it's great. But I'm stoked for... I'm sure once I'm done setting up my studio i'll do a test stream it's always like one of those things where it's like i'll eventually get to streaming then like you'll pop in maybe if every now and then then it's just like yeah i don't i'm not a streamer i don't like consider that my job yeah like a lot of other youtubers do because i don't know i've just never been that big into streaming um so i don't i don't know, I've just never been that big into streaming.

So I don't know if there's like, I don't think there's an expectation for me to stream. So I don't really feel the pressure to stream, but I'll stream when I want to. And I have a lot of fun when I do. I do another Yoohoo stream. Oh, we should do a Yoohoo stream. That was... That looked miserable.

It was. I think I drank nine Yoohoos. You made yourself throw up, right? No. No? Damn. I kept them all. That's crazy.

I kept nine Yoo-Hoos. That's crazy. I let nine Yoo-Hoos snake their way through my entire body. Like, nine Yoo-Hoos absorbed into my cells and through my intestines and delivered in my blood. Your body got nutrients from them. Yeah. It got a lot of nutrients, man. Hold on, how much sugar is in a Yoo-Hoo?

Like just one Yoo-Hoo. One Yoo-Hoo. It's chocolate beverage. How much sugar is in a Yoo-Hoo? Let's see. Okay, 19 grams. So basically 19 times 9 uh oh oh no yeah so that's that was that was 171 grams of sugar so what else is in there see i got some vitamins you who does have some good vitamins in it man like that's what it's from i was like is there

another drink called like yahoo and i'm like oh that's from like a hey arnold episode where like they were drinking this new chocolate drink or something called yahoo yeah i love when like things slightly change things to get away with it dude okay one yoohoo has five percent of my daily intake of potassium so you got five days worth of nutrients all in all in one day no no it has five percent of my daily intake that i need so nine you who's oh okay so 45 yeah so almost half my daily potassium and each one has seven percent of my daily carbs you know so seven times nine 49 sure i dude i don't fucking know how to do. The school system failed me, dude. I can't do fucking.

I never have to do math anymore. Oops, I'm wrong. That's seven times seven is 49. Yeah, 63. You who makers sued for five million for false advertising. Who? You who makers. Yeah, there's an article from 2010.

Yeah, but it tastes great. A Brooklyn man is suing the makers of yoo-hoo chocolate flavored drink for five million claiming they falsely advertise it as good for you when it actually contains unhealthy ingredients according to the federal lawsuit who thinks that a chocolate beverage is good for you i thought that i was gonna get all my nutrients by drinking yoo-hoo god damn it these people know they're not actually upset about it i mean no they're just suing to sue a company and try to get money that's all yeah or it's like how could you don't don't uh don't advertise this to kids telling them that it'll

make them healthy they need to be drinking their apple juice their sugary orange juice and apple juice. Orange juice is literally like acid and sugar. Oh, he said, here we go. Timothy Dahl, 35, is looking to take the suit nationwide as a class action suit. Damn, dude, I would have loved to join in on this. Charging that the beverage once touted by Yogi Berra as the drink of champions actually contains dangerous, unhealthy, non-nutritious, partially hydrogenated oil, court papers say. Dude, some fucking judge

just like, well, this is my day today. I guess I have to just deal with this. I'm looking up Yogi Berra. Wait, Yogi Berra? Berra. B-E-R-R-A. I don't know what that...

But Yogi? Dude, Dr. Pepper owns Yoohoo. Dr. Pepper Snapple Group. That's the name of the company. ...will be brought to you by Camel. America's best light cigarette. I'm up here in the press box watching a great ball player.

It's New York Yankee catcher, Yogi Berra. Okay, so he... Is a baseball player really named Yogi Berra? Three times. We'll talk to Yogi in a minute. One question I've always wanted to ask you. Yogi Berra? Talk to the batters a lot, Yogi.

What do you say to them? Try to help them, Jim. Help them? The guys you want to beat? Where's the you who? Is this... Hold up. Women's protein. At every day, Jim, road work. guys you want to be where's the you who is this hold up at every day gym road work what do you eat to keep yourself going i always eat puss and boots fish flavor or meat flavor and your puss and boots is a complete diet vitamins protein he

eats puss and boots i can't tell if it's like it's supposed to be like the cat saying it or if like it's like that guy eats the puss in boots cat food in a can they really did that advertisement poorly where it looks like the guy's the one that eats the fucking puss in boots cat food who knows more about cats than puss in boots that's true man who does know more than more about cats he loved you just for kids use for anyone who likes a delicious chocolate drink. Made with nourishing low-fat milk. Get Yoohoo from their Koi brands. Okay.

Yoohoo, the lawyers for Yoohoo came out and were like, this is a trivial lawsuit. Yoohoo is absolutely a safe and fun treat for anyone who enjoys. I love it. That's why I do it so much when they say that it's so fun. But I love when companies describe their product as fun like it's a fun new drink it's a fun drink man you're gonna have fun when you drink it when you're drinking yoohoo you're gonna have a good time i don't care if you're at your mother's funeral if there's yoohoo there you're gonna have a good time you're gonna crack it open and fucking

yeah but yeah i have so much fun using this product when i use yoohoo that's i love that's like one of my favorite every time i'm using the product you who i'm having a great time i love i i'm not gonna lie like i do like you i enjoy you who i don't think i maybe i would now i just realized they sell it in the same exact same bottles of snapple i just remember being too watery when i had it one time i was like this is so watery well it's because you're expecting chocolate milk, but it's a chocolate drink. But like, why is it? It's a chocolate beverage. You expect it to be like thick or something,

but it's like very... It is still thick. But... Yeah. It's still watery. Is Yoohoo thicker than water? The age-old debate. Hey bro, Yoohoo's thicker than water. Nope. Nopeold debate. Hey, bro, you who's thicker than water? Nope.

Nope. They're the exact same. Did they ever find out if blood's thicker than water? Blood. Blood? Because it's plasma. Yeah, and it has, it's like water that has stuff in it. Dude, blood's crazy.

Every time I cut myself and I, like, look at the blood, I'm like, holy shit. That's like, that's like just a bunch of like cells but that's what it looks like visually all close together yeah it blood's pretty like the shade of red i'm not not in like a weird psycho way i think it's it's pretty liquid looks blood's so pretty on you my baby you look good in blood that sure would look good with some blood on it that'd be crazy hey it's a corpse song baby you look good in blood let's uh let's go back you know the creek the one with all the rocks this guy's definitely wearing a jack skellington shirt we should go and sit next to that maybe we could go to the Hot Topic in the mall.

I can get my parents to drive us. Who? You're 33. Yeah. I get my parents to drive us. Dressed up like a Jack Skellington t-shirt was too small for him. Okay, we're here, baby. Listen to this dream.

So, is this your new girlfriend, Jonathan? We're having a moment. Please leave us. Was that you? Oops no that was me actually sorry Haha gotcha. Dude I want to know how many dudes have farted on a first date by accident And just like they have. Tell us your funny fart stories in the comment section below Dude you know out there though there's been a day where like they're like they click perfectly like it's it's so good and they're like like about to score it's about to like home run and he accidentally farts in front of the girl and just completely just she's she's out of it no and then like would that ever turn with that like for people who have such a big connection

with someone would a fart really put them off okay i'm done here's another here's another ad read no hi can i take your order please can i get a big mac mcbrad meat flurry and a mcdouble keep it real i need a happy meal make crispy and tan mcnuggets tasty golden fries a cold drink with extra ice junior chicken will be fire and a sweet hot apple bar is that it let me get a quarter pound of a cheese a flat fish oh please make good as a mcmuffin and a large coffee a hamburger cheeseburger hodgepodge hot cakes vanilla cone shake and a hot bar sundae bro you're laying them on thick how was it was your poop like hot lava today or was it a nice like we were talking the other the other day the other night well you didn't answer my question

no it was it was just right is it solid it's fine yeah okay we were talking the other night while editing about like how some of our humor is just so immature and crass and gross and we're like it's like farting into the microphone and fucking like showing like our streams of piss it's like it's like we gotta remember that probably like 90 of the people that would watch the video were like oh jesus so these are just 30 year olds acting like high schoolers yeah essentially it's like wow okay that's their job is is farting into their cell phone i have realized like when we go out to like this most recent vlog we like did it up a bit and we're having to like you know cut you know kind of hold back a little on some of that we're trying to not

be because you know the boys love it the boys think it's great but girls not so much and and the ladies maybe some fellas might not like it too if they're weird but you know we're trying to keep it more less potty humor i said immediately after like farting on the podcast four three times three so you counted yeah oh i know i never i actually your farts counted since i've been born you've never forgotten to fart no i've been counting up you can't forget a good that was 61 249 i'm sometimes a menace uh dennis yeah dennis the menace i just go out in public and if like someone's kind of like in my way to get around them and if i have if i have to put a little effort in getting around them i'll just go like as I'm

passing. Wait, the sound or like an actual? Just the sound. Oh, okay. I do that too. Like you got me into doing that and then now I'll do it for my own entertainment. Like I'll pass a dude and target real close and be like because like no one's gonna be like, hey, what was that? Like no one's gonna go out of their way because I'll be like, I didn't hear anything. And also

it's just. Yeah, like doing it to like a group of friends or like you can sometimes like. Look around? Yeah. Hey, who was that? Come on. I'll be like, I didn't hear anything. And also, it's just... I like doing it to a group of friends. And then you can sometimes... Hey, who was that? Come on. What are we, fucking in fourth grade? Jesus Christ, guys. It's such a fun song. This fucking 30-year-old man with a man bun, actually.

He came by and just made a fart noise at us. Security's going to come up to you one day. I'm like, sir, you need to come with me. At a mall, it's like, what? It's like we have reports of you. Consistent reporting of you. Walking by women and making them feel uncomfortable by making a farting noise in their ear.

Like you're making women uncomfortable over and over. No, I'm just the true test officer. I'm trying to find the perfect woman. Well, she'll do it back you that one day you're gonna hear and then it's like your deep love they will our eyes will link see that's that's the test if i ever hear someone do that again that's how i know that that it's a true connection you know it's it's funny um because a lot of people ask us how to do that sound. It's so hard, you know. It kind of is.

Because most people you have to do it a lot to figure out just the right amount of pressure on the lips. I can't even whistle. It just sounds like wind outside. I don't whistle the correct way. I can't whistle the sounds like wind outside I don't have a I don't whistle the correct way I can't whistle the way most people whistle

But you used to whistle Yeah so it sounds a little like raspy You can't get that clean whistle No most people are like I don't know I can't do it We gotta go to whistle camp So everyone can whistle But some people can they be born better with the shapes of their mouths

Yeah of course Their tongues and shit one can whistle yeah but some people can they be born better with the shapes of their mouth of course their tongues and shit definitely people with big sloppy tongues are probably good at not kissing not kissing you have a big sloppy tongue yeah i do dude i said whenever i told you you're a bad kisser no so what they have for me have they actually the uh one of the first times i made out i think they just accept the fact that they look at me and go he's gonna be a bad kisser and like that's they just take one look at me and you know they look at me and they're like he's gonna be a fucking god in the sack and then you're not and so what happened this one time well it was one of the first times it was it was one of the first times i made out with with someone and she stopped like two minutes in she was like you're really bad at kissing and i was like oh

um sorry i'm kind of new and then she's like i i was apparently i was i was using too much lip yeah baby kissing's weird dude dude like if you it's like you're a new kisser it's such a weird form of improv make your mouths touch and then your tongue sometimes but make them touch in a way that's rhythmically not awkward

yeah I know the first few kisses I ever had I know I was just an awful kisser. I remember the first one I had with one of my first girlfriends. I smashed my teeth into her braces. And that's the only time we kissed, actually. That was it.

It's like... I love, like, people, like, on reality TV, when they make out, they open their mouth so... It's like... They want to get so much tongue the dude's so horny he's like I want to put my fucking tongue down her throat I don't think I've ever kissed with like how they do in movies

and shit it's like how do you even do that like where their mouth's like stretched to two times like cartoon ass like in movies yeah also I fucking hate the sound of kissing. Like on TV or in a movie. When it's exciting, it's like...

Like people making out. When I watch The Bachelor, The Bachelorette, they have their mics on, and then when they start kissing, it'll just be like... And I'm just like, I fucking hate that sound. Like a soft Tinder kiss. Come here, baby. Is that why when I kiss you on the head, you cringe?

Well, it's also because... Well, yes. Whenever you place a Tinder kiss on my neck as a prank... Good prank. But it really... It makes the hairs on my arms stand up. Not in a horny way, but it's like an auto-reflex. I'm like, ooh!

It gives a shiver down my spine that makes me feel bad because you should be excited that your friend ryan's about it literally takes my breath away when you and and uh basically send shivers of butterflies down my spine it also i get giddy like a school boy but it also it's the facial hair when because when you give me a kiss on the neck, I feel your facial hair. And it reminds me of when I used to kiss my dad on the lips as a child. And I would feel his facial hair, and I really fucking hated it. When's the last time you kissed your dad on the lips? When's the last time y'all's lips have touched?

Last time I went home. No, uh honestly i was probably four maybe or five in fourth grade fifth grade you're not you're not in fifth grade no i know that okay no yeah like probably like four or five because i i actually only have one specific memory of kissing my dad on the lips and it was before bed you have a specific memory Because I remember how much I hated the feeling of facial hair. So when he was leaning in, you were like... So I think that's... So you as a kid, when he was leaning in for that kiss... Well, I wanted to kiss my dad on the lips. I was a youngin'.

I was a little boy. You don't understand that that's... So you went in for it. You held your lips out. Now even just talking about it makes me feel uncomfortable. Why? Talking about kissing my dad on the lips? People make fun of fucking what's his name for doing it?

Sportsman? Yeah. Oh, yes. Why can't I remember his name either? Football boy? Al Sharpton. No, not Al Sharpton. No, what's his name?

Why do I... Why am I... Tom Clancy. Why am I suddenly forgetting this? Tom Clancy. Tom something Tim? No, not Tim Tebow. Tom... Tom Clancy. Why am I suddenly forgetting this? Tom something Tim. No, not Tim Tebow. Tom Arnold?

Tim Tebow. No, not... Okay, wait. What's his name? Hey, Jackson. He kisses his son. Jackson. Why can't either of us remember this? Meekane did a video. Fuck. Tim Brady. Tom Brady. Tom Brady. That's it. That's it.

So, I mean, everyone gives him flack for doing it, but you and your dad were doing the same thing. Yeah, but also his kids are much older, and when he kisses them on the lips, it's not like a little peck, like, I love you, son. It's like, where's my kiss? Which he says. And there's a documentary or some shit where he's laying down on a massage table, and his son's leaving the room. He's like, hey. And he Spider-Mans that shit. He's like, hey, where's my kiss? Where's my kiss?

And then the kid comes back and gives him a big old kiss. That's so I remember for a video that. That kid's gonna get bullied. Probably already does. Well, I mean, his dad's Tom Brady, so maybe not. I don't know. When his dad's gonna be old, it's gonna be like.

We actually knew a guy that was Tom Brady's cousin. Do you remember him? Yeah, and he said Tom Brady would kiss him, too. Yeah, he kisses everyone in the family. We really did know Tom Brady's cousin. It was just like a random fact he dropped one day, and we had no idea that they were cousins. And he proved it. He proved it to us.

He showed us pictures and everything. But yeah, anyway, I'm going to use the little boys room if that's okay okay and i think we can wrap it up here okay sounds good that sound good to you okay well um if everyone uh go uh subscribe to our patreon and uh watch our videos we have a discord now patreon discord yeah fun fun we'll pop in every now and then say hey talk about some stuff you know it's gonna be lots of fun. Come on, come on. You'll talk with all the other epic mega heads.

There's a bunch of different little channels that you can really be precise in your interests. So, bye. Bye. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because you know if you own a home it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well whether it's in everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality it can be hard just to know where to start. But now all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the

quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience, and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app, answer a few questions, and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly, which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I.com.