supermegashow - EP 261 - Matt Buys More Stars

Episode Date: September 8, 2021

We talk about stars, flies, and things. Cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a month at MintMobile.com/SUPERMEGA. Find out how Upstart can lower your monthly payments today when you go to Upstart.com/SUPERMEGA. As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at BetterHelp.com/supermega Get a special offer that includes a 4-week trial PLUS free postage and a digital scale, just go to Stamps.com, click on the Microphone at the TOP of the homepage and type in SUPERMEGA. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because, you know, if you own a home, it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now, all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience, and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app, answer a few questions, and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish.

Or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly. Which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps. Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I.com. Your two-day to super mega cast, the only podcast for the sons of Israel. What's up, guys? Have we started one like that before? Maybe. I feel like I've heard that before. We're the sons of Israel, though. Yeah.

Welcome to the Super... Well, one of us is. That being you. Oh, you're Palestinian. That's right. Fucking idiot. Well, you can still be a son of Israel. No, I cannot.

Yes, you can. I will not abandon my people. Can you explain why? What? Is there something... Is there something with Israel and Palestine that I'm missing? Is there some conflict

that I'm not understanding? I thought they were allies. Are they not? You know, they say that the truest friends start out as the worst of enemies. Yeah, one day Israel and Palestine are going to be... I don't even think that's a real saying. It sounds like it could be. That makes no sense.

It doesn't make sense. That makes zero sense. If someone said it, you'd let it pass. Yeah, I'd be like, oh yeah, that's a... You can bullshit a lot of things like that. You can just come up with like, oh, you know, the old saying and then say something as long as it sounds like official like that. Like the deepest of our enemies can become the closest to our hearts. And it's like, oh, yeah, that's that's a that's a well-known saying.

Right. Well, I mean, it opens you up to, I don't know, mend bridges that were once thought to be broken maybe with an enemy. Like the bridge to Terabithia. That bridge broke and she fell in the water and died. Is it too late to become a vigilante, Matt? Am I too old? Is it not cool? You're 27, dude.

You can be a vigilante. I was thinking of getting like a mask. Like what type of vigilante? Like I'd go fight crime around LA. Dude, I can't think of a better but worse city to do that in. Because you're just going to deal with people on meth that have superhuman strength. I'd clean up the streets. I'd get the homeless off of Skid Row. Get the fuck out of here!

I'm going to go clean up the streets. And streets and just scream at homeless people and beat them up get the fuck out of here i went i did i did a good dude this week i went to uh echo park uh you did a good dude this week it's crazy no i did a good not my sort of deeds the plural for dude i I went to the park. Nice sunny day. There was some homeless assholes sitting there being all homeless and shit. I beat the shit out of them, put them on a bus to go just somewhere else. Good. Yeah. Good.

Hopefully, maybe a bus stop in the middle of the Arizona desert. Ooh. Also, I found a homeless guy who was, you know, he had a Mexican accent. So I got him deported. Yeah, fucking badass. Welcome to Super Megacast episode 261. Now, they didn't do a background check before they deported him. They just were like,

yeah, I mean, sounds, yeah. Do you think that the Immigration Services and Border Patrol really do a background check? No. They don't have time. No. They're busy with deporting everyone else. So, yeah, all the criminals. they're busy with deporting everyone else so yeah all the criminals they're busy putting kids in cages and separating them from their parents with no records of whose kid is who anyways as matt was saying welcome to episode 261 of the super

mega cast yes sir where uh we just like to keep it real with our audience yeah you know we just keep it real we just we really like we say the things that other podcasters are too afraid to say exactly other podcasters they they they they they have this fantasy in their heads like the the world is is perfect oh i don't want to offend anyone i don't want to get you have to be audience mad well you won't hear this on other podcasts. And then I'm going to put a clip of a slur right there. Hey, we're not saying it. Yeah. Just put when Michael Richards yelled the N-word.

Okay, I will. Obviously, there's no clip. I didn't forget to put a clip. I'm not going to put a clip of a- God, Ryan really forgot to put the clip again. How lazy. He forgot to put the N-word in the middle of the Super Megacast. They mentioned it in everything.

Not the middle, like the first two minutes. What? Like the advertising agency, like, guys, what? It's our podcast. It's called Freedom of Speech, jackass. And that means we can say whatever we want with no consequences, idiot. Whenever we want. Mm-hmm.

And we're going to say it. How we want it. Not the N-word, but we're going to say it. How we want it. Not the N-word, but we're going to say what we're thinking. Exactly. But not the N-word. You know, I like those Super Mega Boys. They say what they're thinking. All right, guys.

But yeah, welcome back. We are actually nearing the end of an era right now. The end of the era of our podcast as it's been for 260 episodes up to here. Yeah. We don't know. We're hoping to make the change soon. Definitely by 270. But it's going to.

I mean, that's still like a good two months away for a lot of people. But yeah. Yeah. And we have seen people voice concerns that it's like, oh, well, you know, I like this podcast. And if you switch it over to like live action on a set where we can see you guys, you're going to focus on visual gags and the podcast will lose the way it feels. That's not true. We will not be focusing on visual gags. We're going to try to maintain it.

I'm not saying a visual gag won't happen here and there, but we're going to try to maintain it because we know everyone, most of our listeners will be audio only. So we're going to keep it comfortable for that. You know, we're going to make sure that you could still, we're going to have a chill setup where we can have nice and relaxing conversation. It's going to be like this. Talking about stars and oceans. Specifically the star named Ryan McGee. Yep. Yeah.

Which you, where's the certificate? It never fucking came. What? I paid extra. You have an online version. Well, I paid extra to get it framed and have it sent. You still have the certificate. Well, okay.

You know what? I'm going to actually go right now. If you guys, Ryan, while I'm looking for the certificate, can you, can you please explain to maybe newer viewers or people who skipped that episode uh it's in the super megacast episode called we buy a star i think is the title it is episode uh 191 matt buys a star matt buys a star uh g scorpi was the was the star uh which is now named Ryan McGee, and that was in May of 2020. It's not named Ryan McGee. Well, yes, it is, because I bought it and named it Ryan McGee.

It's my star. So, Matt, knowingly got scammed. No, I didn't get scammed, you fucking asshole. Why don't you stop spreading fake news and lies? There's no fake news and lies, my brother. I'm just, okay. Okay, how about you spent an interesting amount of

money for something that never came. Okay, you know what, give me a... Because most of the money went for the certificate to get here, right? Or did most of the money go to the star? Which one cost more? They put it on a rocket and send it straight to the star uh sorry i'm just trying to find it i'm trying to find talking

about i'm trying to find the certificate did you lose it i'm just finding my email no i searched ryan mcgee and where's the last place you remember it being search star uh and then i got to go back to may 2020 oh wow i have a lot of emails that have the word star in them but i bought ryan his very own star and he didn't appreciate it there's a star uh way up in the sky at the night sky which you can see with the naked eye on certain nights and it's named ryan mcgee and there's a wikipedia page for that star and people did put uh people this is not that i'll go check people put I don't know why it gets taken off. It says in popular culture in that section.

So it's not like it's a lie. But it's like in popular culture. On episode 191 of the podcast Super Megacast, the star was named Ryan McGee. So I'm going to... It's also called Fuyue. References? No.

Search G score by. That's what I did. No, yeah. I'm already on the page. I'm on the page. I'm already on the page. I'm just looking to see. Sorry, I'm trying to find... Yeah, why don't you focus on that?

I don't know what the service was called that I bought it from. That's why it's... It's going to be in May 2020, though. That's all I know. So, it'd be crazy if they actually ripped me off. That wouldn't... It would not happen oh there's our email offering us ambassadorship for

Triller a fantastic service that will definitely start posting on Triller offered us this thing basically you guys know Triller it's like they try to compete with TikTok unsuccessfully and then you know H3H3 has that

big lawsuit is it a lawsuit oh wow he's being against what's his name ryan murphy ryan cavanaugh ryan cavanaugh yeah and he uh brian or ryan cavanaugh i think it's ryan cavanaugh what the fuck is this i'm sorry dude i'm just trying to find star certificate. And it's just like... Hey, and if you're going to sue anyone, Ryan, other Ryan, sue Matt. I didn't besmirch your beautiful name. Your gorgeous name. Don't sue me.

Do it. That would be kind of not epic. Sue Matt. Sue Matt. Sue Ryan. Sue Ryan. We have the same name. I didn't say anything disparaging against you.

I didn't say anything disparaging against you I didn't say anything disparaging I just said that Triller offered us some deal where they're like we'll give you guys a stake in the company with like some really small share in the company you said he looks like he has bad breath before the podcast I didn't say that but he does look like he has bad breath

and there's good pictures of him with Harvey Weinstein um okay I found it Ryan but wait what? yeah there's pictures of him with Harvey Weinstein there's pictures of him because he looks like Harvey Weinstein. Okay, I found it, Ryan. Wait, what? Yeah, there's pictures of him with Harvey Weinstein. No, there's pictures of him because he looks like Harvey Weinstein. Ethan has a picture on his podcast. Look at this. Ryan Kavanaugh Harvey Weinstein Burger.

Weinstein Burger. Here's him kissing Harvey Weinstein on the head. Is that him kissing Harvey Weinstein burger. Weinstein burger. Look, here's him kissing Harvey Weinstein on the head. Is that him kissing Harvey Weinstein on the head? Yes. Dude. I told you. Um. Harvey Weinstein looks so happy.

Good. My man's had a glow up. God damn. My man be dressing. Uh, ooh. I love the video of him getting slapped in the face at a restaurant. Oh, that one's good. Get the fuck out of here, man.

He's just like. Because he can't do anything about it. No, that one's good. Get the fuck out of here, man. He's just like... Because he can't do anything about it. No, of course not. Okay, I found it, Ryan. In fact, I might have to... Your Cosmo Nova order from April 29th, 2020 is processed. Matt, your star is registered. Congratulations, your star now officially named and shines in the sky.

Okay, here we go. Here we go. Estimated dispatch time for my framed certificate. Three days. I spent $100 on... Did they not send you tracking at all? No.

Okay, you know what? Get in touch by email. I'm emailing them right now. Don't do that, man. Don't do that. Hello. them right now hello is that his his bodyguard us to justin he looks so surprised you're a fucking piece of shit and what would you do about it shut the fuck up i like that like the guy with harvey we Weinstein's trying to like clap back. Shut the fuck up.

What do you mean what'd you do about it? You just slapped him. What are you going to do about Harvey? Don't, don't, don't do that man. You like gave him like, like a light, light, light slaps on the face. I was hoping it was going to be more of a. What sucks though is that Harvey Weinstein is one of those people that's rich's rich even though he's fallen from his throne but could still be like all right i'll sue you for assault and a lot of money harvey weinstein's such a despicable piece of shit

like a lot of people don't realize how in depth like how bad it actually got where he would have teams of people do back like dig on the girls he was he was sleeping with find dirt and then black blackmail them with it like specifically like he would like he enjoyed it like not just that but like blatant like it's also a rape of threats yeah and also his penis was apparently so stinky and really really like disformed that was in the court uh documents they had to testify. They were just trying to embarrass him. How could they do, my man? You know what, dude? All these great men that they try to embarrass by making fun of their penis.

Harvey Weinstein, Jeffrey Epstein, Michael Jackson. What's wrong? They said that, I love in the deposition, it's like, Mr. Epstein, your penis has been described as egg-shaped. Is that true? And he's like, what? And he's like, you know, it's very thick at the base. Isn't that where he cuts the energy? Like, he laughs.

Yeah, he laughs. And his lawyer's like, we're not doing this. And he's like, it's just a question. I wonder if it was egg-shaped. Like, literally, it's just the exact shape and size of an egg. Of an egg? I wouldn't want to crack that one. Do you think it felt like a boiled egg when you bobbled around with it? Like if you held a warm boiled egg in your hand that didn't have the shell?

Or maybe it does have the shell. I love boiled eggs. Boiled eggs are good as fuck. I love deviled eggs now. You hear? I love deviled eggs. I love making deviled eggs. Dude, deviled eggs are a delicious southern delicacy.

They are. Sorry, man. I are a delicious Southern delicacy. They are. Sorry, man. I'm emailing the Cosmonova team. Hello, I paid for and ordered a framed certificate from my star on April 2020, and it never arrived. Okay. I just emailed them, dude, and I said to ship it to the office. So I hope we can get that star certificate soon. You know what I'm saying?

I mean, it's the only way to prove. And then you can take a picture with it and you have physical proof. And when people say you don't own a star, specifically people like Ryan McGee, I could say, no, you're wrong. Look, I carried in your wallet. Can you get a tiny version that goes in a wallet did they give you that option when you bought it i know but i can print my own i'm sure your own little tiny version of it yeah could i have a little tiny version of it as well yeah if you'll if you'll actually if you'll actually agree i'll carry it around it's my star

it's my star technically it's named after here's the star map oh and I got a I ordered a physical copy of the star map I paid $19 for a black uh 3 4th inch thick frame um okay it says it's assigned in the star registry dude what the fuck I clicked the certificate and it says file not found

what the fucking shit okay I gotta send another email real quick. You know, I could see... Sorry, hold up. I'm texting some very important people. Will Smith? Oh.

How's he been, dude? Shut up. Don't talk to me when I'm trying to think of what witty banter I'm gonna type to Will Smith right now. Can I talk to the you know what if cosmonova fucks us over with this star you know what that means right okay i'm done what if cosmonova fucks us with this star we will we will send the full force of our fans upon them to destroy the reputation of their business the meg heads god dude jackson coined the term meg head and i can't decide if i hate that or meg head is i i never good for an ironic term meg heads i i would like i think mega head would have been better, maybe even. Meg head just makes

me think of Meg Griffin. Maybe that's better. I'm a meg head. I never got why they always made fun of her for being so unattractive. I thought she, I thought there were certain redeeming qualities. Yeah? Like what? Like her

glasses. Yeah, the round glasses. Or her triangle nose. I did like the... She did have a nice nose. And I will say that the hat was... She had her mother's nose. She did. She didn't have Peter's little nub nose.

I wonder what that would look like. It's weird that Meg had more of a prominent feature from her mother. Which Peter thought was ugly. And Chris had more of a prominent feature from her mother. Which Peter thought was ugly. And Chris had more of a prominent feature from his father. Usually the son would look more like the mom. Yeah, that's actually a good point. I would love to see some fan art where they swap that out. Where Chris looks more like Lois.

Can someone do that for us? Please. That would really be... For free? I'm not paying someone for that for us? please that would really be for free? that would I'm not paying someone for that exactly you can do it on your phone your best representation

of what Chris would look like with I guess I could just simply photoshop Meg's nose onto Chris and then figure that out for myself

well my thing about Meg is that what would Meg look like with Peter's nose peter's nose chris's nose type of that's what i want to see and i i think that megan has always looked uh great and here she's really hot uh even even better than when she uh had her makeover if seth would let her turn 18 i would be all over her sweet pussy and breasts wham bam thank you ma'am would be all over her sweet pussy and breasts wham bam thank you ma'am direct quote from chris chan on a youtube video i was waiting for you to um but i'm actually uh doing something right now

that's very um very you're gonna be very excited what is it can you can you describe it as you're uh no okay so sorry i'm a little bit i'm just a little bit preoccupied if you would mind just just please entertaining the fans okay uh let's see here i know i know what to do know i know what to do yeah what are you gonna do i'm gonna read sorry guys hey go on what were you saying i just just just just just just just just just just just just just give me a second i'm gonna read some funny ocean jokes really funny ocean jokes 52 ocean jokes that are sure to make you got a genuine fucking laugh from me, dude. Knock, knock. Who's there? Kelp.

Kelp who? Kelp me, I'm drowning. Right? Oh, that's good. That's good. Okay, are you ready? Yeah, yeah. Okay, how do you make an octopus laugh?

Wait, wait, let me, let me. I don't know. With tentacles. I was going to say something about tentacles. Like you tentacle them. That is, dude, that is just dope. You know? What does a dolphin say when he's confused?

Can you please be more Pacific? You know what I'm saying? That one's not very good. No, that one's actually. But, you know, maybe they could be a little more porpoiseful with these jokes. Okay. Right? Where's the ocean the deepest?

It's actually called the Challenger Deep, and it's almost 11 kilometers deep. At the bottom. Is that really the joke? Where's the ocean the deepest at the bottom? Yeah. That's hilarious, man. Ooh. Who keeps the ocean clean?

I don't know the mermaid right okay this is here's okay i'll do one more are you ready yes why do whales swim in salt water why do whales swim in salt water? Because, um, this one's actually like stupid. Like, I mean, they all have been stupid. This one takes the cake. Why do they swim in salt water?

Because they see if you can, I'm genuinely thinking, think stupid, think stupid, think stupid. Uh, think the most basic connection you can make. Why do they swim in salt water?

Because they whale orc Stop. Just wait. Stop. Just give me a second, dude. I'm giving you multiple seconds here.

I don't think I wouldn't be able to get it. Okay, just give it to me, man. Because pepper water makes them sneeze. That is so fucking stupid. I told you. I told you. Think stupid. That's so stupid, dude.

Why? Okay. So I entertained everyone with some ocean jokes. Yeah. Are you ready to unveil what's been going on? Or do I need to figure out some other text? I'm almost. I'm almost ready to unveil it.

Okay. And it's going to be. It'm almost ready to unveil it. Okay? And it's gonna be it's a treat for both of us. It's a wonderful treat. Okay? Well, it looks like I have to tell more ocean jokes. Yeah, you got it, man. Okay. What did the sand say

to the ocean? See you later? What are you doing tonight? Oh. That was a good one. Yeah, it's alright, man. that's it's okay oh this one's how do fish get to school in the wait something it's gonna be is it gonna be a school bus joke it's gonna be another stupid ass and uh and uh carp pool no one would ever and the carp you're on the right track but they decided to go with by octobus What? That's so stupid

I'm gonna look I'm just gonna make sure I'm gonna look up the word octobus Yeah Nothing Nothing? Nothing Well that's because it's not a thing It's octopus

There's not even like another joke It's because it's not a thing. It's octopus. There's not even like another joke. It's because they just changed the P to a B. That's weird. Did they just make these jokes up? Yes. And this is the last joke. Perfect timing because I'm almost done with what I was doing for us. I'll pick a good one.

Yeah? Yeah. Lay it on me, brother. Let's see it. Find the best one you can. Find the best ocean joke you can buddy yeah why did you say it's not a good joke these are funny man these are like at the scholastic book fair i could get a joke book okay there's one good one and one bad one want to end like that one good one okay here's the good one i think is good which you should probably i think you should be able to get instantly which are the strongest creatures in the ocean

sharks muscles that's pretty good right that's pretty funny yeah and yeah here's another that is funny why are goldfish orange goldfish are orange because gold's too expensive because the water makes them rusty well rust also is an orange so that's stupid well i mean they had to come up with 52 ocean jokes here okay that's true that's true you know it was it was hard for them i wonder what number 52 is i'm ready to make waves today oh they're just ocean puns whale hello there sorry unveil the big secret so ryan i have been i i've always loved space um it's so cool one might say one might say yeah it mayhaps i've always been a really big space geek but now i'm really kind of embracing it and letting it did you buy tickets for so we can go to space yes you guessed it we're going to esos's rocket we're going to uh the andromeda Galaxy, buddy. Woo! We're going to Centauri, Proxima Centauri B. But in the real timeline, what's happening?

What's going on? Do you have airdrop on? Yes. Just because it's been a while. Do you know what a binary star is? It's two stars that orbit each other. Really? Yeah. They're very common in the universe

did you get a matt and ryan star or a super mega star hold up what do you see buddy it says matthew chan and ryan coon there's a binary star system now, Ryan, where it's Matthew Chan and Ryan Coon orbiting each other. Is that not amazing, dude? You spent more money on... This was $200.

I ordered the star maps. How much was this? $200. I ordered the star maps and I ordered the frame certificates. Constellations. Cygnus. Registration number.

It's such a bullshit number. What the fuck are you talking about? We're not rehashing this. But they're the coordinates. That's nice. Yeah. So wait. So I do want to put out this star map publicly when this episode comes out so people can go find it.

There it is. Dude, that's a beautiful fucking star map. And I got it. I got it. It's getting shipped to us. Oh, my goodness gracious. There it is. I'm going to Joshua Tree soon with Jackson.

And one of the things I want to do is do some like stargazing. It's one of the best places in the country. And I'm going to see if I can find Ryan McGee and Ryan Coon and Matthew Chan. Ooh, okay. Matthew Chan, Matthew... Chan, I think, right? Yeah, it's technically Chan. I don't know if people usually say,

Matthew Chan! Yeah. Matthew Chan! And Ryan Coon! See, I gave you the more male, like manly, honorific title. Is that what that is? Coon is like what you say to your bros.

And then Chan is like what, you know, like friends is like like like what you say to your bros and then uh chan is like what you know like friends like a lot of girls say it uh usually yeah usually used for boys as coon is usually used for boys especially the younger ones what especially why was that it just is a weird sentence just younger younger boys on the contrary especially younger girls but the nuance is quite different while coon implies some kind of tension because it's for boys like don't know sean is much tenderer more intimate and has a little bit of a funny feeling attached to it yeah it does so mine's just like mine's the more boring one well i mean do you want i'm sorry man do you want me to wait no it's honorific in anime so it is it is i'm good they're both they're both as long as i'm

epic in anime yeah i'm trying to i don't i don't know how to actually find this star i don't think this one this star system has a wik Wikipedia page they could literally just just just they wouldn't even be a real star they just give you some bullshit and like yep you just got a star I don't know why they wouldn't there's such an abundance of stars to use can we sell kind of a weird there's on there there's like literally like so many stars in the universe that you couldn't even fathom the number it's like there I There, I fathomed it. It's 69 septillion. I fathomed it all. Sex trillion.

Dude, did you really just fathom that? Yep. All of it. Fuck. I can't do that. What if we sold stars? You gotta open up your third eye. What if we sold official Super Mega stars?

Like NFTs, but there's just stars, and we license them off. It's like, what if we buy a collection of stars can we put super mega on the hollywood walk of fame the stars there yeah how much is it a million dollars no it's a hundred thousand they don't just give it to you you have to qualify and then you have to buy your own hollywood star that was that was our that was our uh self-given bonus last week yeah that was a good weekly bonus uh wasn't as good as when we did merch a couple months ago no no no those i mean you can't beat eight figure bonuses but damn dude

uh i do think i've always said this i think that one day so in hollywood on the hollywood walk of stars everyone knows like on the internet like it's gonna be an internet category because right now it's they have like radio or maybe that time is dead and no one cares anymore about the Hollywood Walk of Fame. And it's always in a gross, dingy, little touristy part of L.A. Yeah, everyone thinks Hollywood's so glitzy and glamorous. It's not. It's really dirty and smells like piss. They make it look better whenever they pull out the red carpet at the Dolby.

The Dolby Atmos Theater. Yep. Or a premiere at the Chinese theater. God damn it, dude. Ryan and I were working on our book yesterday, finalizing, doing some editing of the Super Mega Saves the Troops. And to hear more about it, you'll have to suffer through these

ad reads. Oh, fuck, man. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because you know if you own a home it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well whether it's an everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality it can be hard just to

know where to start. But now all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app, answer a few questions and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly, which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps. Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com.

That's A-N-G-I dot com. FanDuel Casino's exclusive live dealer studio has your chance at the number one feeling, winning, which beats even the 27th best feeling, saying I do. Who wants this last parachute? I do. Enjoy the number one feeling, winning, in an exciting live dealer studio, exclusively on FanDuel Casino, where winning is undefeated. 19-plus and physically located in Ontario. Gambling problem? Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca. Please play responsibly. Introducing Tim's new Savory Pinwheels,

the perfect flaky and flavorful snack for those on the go. Like me, who's recording this while snacking. Ooh, delicious. Try the roasted red pepper and Swiss or caramelized onion and parmesan pinwheels only at Tim's. At participating restaurants in Canada for a limited time. Alright. Well, we're back from sponsor break. all right well we're back from sponsor break i'm so sorry that ryan interrupted me to bring you those wonderful messages yeah hey you gotta pay the bills baby yeah maybe we should put a free

would you guys want us to put uh an ad free version on the patreon of the podcast every week we've asked that before people said yeah oh. Oh, okay. We should just do that. Okay. Just so people that don't like ads, they got choices. It's like I can support them on Patreon and get it for free, or I can get it ad-free, or I can just skip the ads. Also, in the YouTube version, you'll see now what we do, is you can look down at the little navigation bar at the bottom, and you'll see exactly where the ad segments are and during the ad segments there's a yellow bar that

fills up at the top of the screen so you can see exactly how far into the ad break it is. Just trying to make it the best because we know some people don't like, you know, they get a little pissy. They do. They get a little my free content! So, you know, we're just trying to make it as smooth

as we can for you guys. So, we care care with a capital C but what I was saying was Ron and I were editing the book yesterday and there was a big old skeeter in the office yep

and a skeeter eater yeah there was a skeeter eater too in the room I don't he did not do his job though no no he did not

because this mosquito was flying around the room you saw how many times I tried to kill it yeah it just kept getting away and now i am covered in mosquito bites then i'm still finding more look at this look at this one on my wrist dude it's even bloody jesus man that fucking is he still is he still about he might still be a large man i don't know there was also a fly dude we've been having i i don't know if it's the same fly that's been tormenting us.

But I remember, it used to be a lot worse. But I'm talking about specifically like two weeks ago. Oh, you're talking about when we were eating? Remember the day with Layton? Layton was here, like we were all working and there was that one fucking fly in the office room. And our office room has a really tall ceiling. So we could go hide up there and chill. Right, because it's the master bedroom.

Wait for us to start eating, then dive down. Yeah, dude. That fly, what was annoying was he would get up in your face. Yeah. Like most flies will just kind of do their shit. He would not leave you alone. You swam away, come back. So we'd be sitting there working,

typing or whatever, and it's silent and you just hear And yesterday, fucking yesterday, we, Ryan and I here by ourselves working on the book, and we took a break on the patio in between chapters. God damn it, if he didn't fly back in.

He did. We left the door cracked. I mean, it was probably a different fly, but I like to believe it was the same one. But I saw it go... Yeah. He's like, yes! Fuck yes!

But God damn it. So then we're inside and we're trying to edit and you and I kept just looking up at the same time because we'd be just... But there was also a mosquito that like would go... Yeah, he'd go right in my ear and that's the one that bit the fuck out of me. Dude, look at that.

Because you can tell that it... Because, like, a fly's not going to sound like that. You know what's going to sound like that? A mosquito that... Right when it's in your ear, I hate it. Because it's just... I have a bite right on the back of my... You're getting bit up, son.

Inside of my knee. Like, the back elbow area. They like your blood. They do. I'm just so sweet. I'm like honey, baby. I'm just a sweet little honeysuckle for those. You know, only female flies bite, so I guess

I'm a bit of a lady magnet. They just can't stay away from sucking me. You know, that's my... Regular flies can bite? What? I thought horse flies bite, right? Yeah, but mosquitoes only the women suck on. Oh, okay. I thought you said flies. Sorry. I might have said flies. But, you know, mosquitoes and the women of Los Angeles have that in common.

They just can't stop sucking me. You dropped something. What did I drop? Your dignity. Oh, fucking. Yeah, I got my bad grandpa shoes on. A pair of Converse I got. Which you found out recently.

Tell the folks. I said this on Brain Wardell and Jack Wagner got. Which you found out recently. Yeah. Tell the folks. I said this on Brandon Wardell and Jack Wagner's podcast, yeah, but still. But it's more important when it's on the Super Mega Cast. I was at a thrift shop

looking through clothes that poor people had touched. Of course. And I found a pair of like brand new white Converses, like high tops. And I love white high top converses and i noticed on the side of each shoe was was like a very nice like printed bad grandpa logo

with a with a johnny knoxville and the little kid and i was like what the fuck uh because they were new so i bought them i was like this is awesome that these like official bad grandpa shoes and i've been wearing them and then i looked them up finally to see what the deal was. And it turns out they are a cast and crew exclusive. So people that worked on the movie. Someone gave that away. Got those for free. It's like a gift.

And they were brand new. So someone obviously just sat on them for seven years. Maybe someone passed away. And that was something that was given away when going through their belongings. The little kid passed away. Did he? No. I was like, oh, damn.

But that means that was a camera person or maybe Knoxville himself. Dude, maybe those were Knoxville shoes. He was like, I don't know. They're 10 and a halves. So I'm assuming they were men's. Knoxville would be the type of jackass to just throw some shit away for a good laugh.

The type of what? Jackass. Oh, did you hear? What? They pushed it. It's February 4th now. jackass to just throw some shit away for a good laugh the type of what jackass oh like that did you hear what pushed it it's february 4th now jackass what yeah i put that on my calendar and everything i saw i saw a picture of you have to go into my calendar and change that i saw steve-o posted a picture of or steve-o or knoxville posted a picture of like a billboard for it and then in the description said february 4th and people in the comments like what the fuck uh but the good news is ryan that's the day before my birthday before i turn 26 what do you say

maybe we have a little friend get together and for my birthday the day before we all go see jackass 4 premiere that sounds amazing then that could be my birthday celebration that that sounds like the perfect birthday celebration to me. February 4th. Now I gotta change. What if we went to the Alamo Draft House so We can do whatever you want. It's gonna be your birthday. You get to choose what we do.

We can all have food while we watch it. And I just gotta make sure it's the right color. Really big shrimp. So now Jackass Forever is 150 days away. 150 days. Why did they push it? They had to add more poop and farts.

Just like the super mega cast. The new Spider-Man will be out in December. Let me just triple check that I'm not... That you're not what? Misimagining this. But Jackass 4. Yeah, now it says 2022 film when i search it uh jackass 2022 film february 4th 2022 budget 10 million dollars that's gonna be my birthday celebration i like that they like

the new people they've added like jasper jasper dolphin from odd future i love that he's part of Jackass now. Because I love Jasper. You know? Hey, it's Jasper. Not even a rapper. Only on this track to let my stacks grow faster. That sounds stupid. That was an old school.

Oldie? Oldie, that. Sorry. Yeah. Some oldies on my cell phone. Frank Ocean's verse is so good. Rent a supercar for a date. Yeah, they really wait up

until the end for him, don't they? They do. They really hold him off. And it's a long ass song. I was only 15 when I drew that donut. That was a good impression. Oh dude, the little kid from Bad Grandpa's in it. What?

Can I see what he looks like now? This picture, he's still... He's not a kid still. Look, that's the kid from Bad Grandpa. Is it really? Yeah, what the fuck? No way. Nuh-uh.

No, sorry, that's just another... Wait. That's just another celebrity. I was like, no way. It was... Okay, yeah, they misled me with this picture. But let me... Jackson Nickel today.

Did you ever watch, like, the Bad grandpa 0.5 or bad grandpa um or like did you watch all the jackass half movies like jackass 2.5 jackass 3.5 yes it's a little man i watched 2.5 with my dad back at our old place i love the 0.5 because they're just chill it's like a documentary documentary and you get to see all the good shit. What's this kid look like now? Maybe like this. We'll see him in the movie, I guess. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He looks like my ugly cousin.

Dude. Well, he is ugly, my cousin. I'm seeing who else is in the cast. We got Jasper. Gene Gunn-Kelly was in the trailer the trailer hey don't let me move to LA hey man I don't care who you are you know you come home and Kylie Jenner

is naked in your bed I don't care if you're 50 years old she's 17 man you're going for it you're going for it oh man I watched some great interviews he has a lot of hilarious quotes out there i like he's like he's like man i've said this so many fucking times like kylie when he was like 23 and kylie was 17 he's like she is man like kylie is my celebrity crush

man don't please don't let me move to la and he's like 13 14 that's his tweet the interviewer was like are you counting down the days until she's 18 he's like man i that's his tweet the interviewer was like are you counting down the days until she's 18 he's like man i'm not waiting till she's 18 man i'm 23 dog it's not we have any lists off all these celebrities like he's like yo man like you know this guy from from acdc dated a 14 year old even wrote a song about her this this guy dated 16 year old and it's like that's not making it any better dude and then uh there's so many interviews where he's being asked about his sex life uh and he's like oh man all my crew is savages you know like there's no cock blockers in his crew but he talks about all the sex he has and how creep how freaky he gets he's like girls

don't even want to like look at my phone because it's just so disgusting like they it's too much for them and then like uh they asked him like what's the what's the like craziest sexual thing he's ever done and he's like haha he's thinking he's like well i don't know it's illegal so uh and then his manager was like tell him like don't don't say anything i can't i can't say it and i'm like the fuck does that mean what do you mean any sexual act that's illegal is usually pretty heinous prostitution but people come out and like even the jackass guys come out in their documentaries about like how they would get prostitutes in the hotels and shit sex workers ryan i'm using the language no i know i know i know but can do people get mad if you say prostitute now is that i don't know acceptable i never thought it was a demeaning i thought whore was oh the demeaning one i thought prostitute was just a job title yeah that's why that's what

as a kid that's what i thought you know maybe it's you're a fucking prostitute well i get i get the negative connotation but it's also, that's not the word itself. It's what society has done. You're prostituting yourself? I can't believe that prostitution is illegal. That's very dumb. I think if you want to sell your body, it's a good, it's a service. So it's like, if someone wants to pay for that and you're willing to supply it, why?

We let them do it online with this OnlyFans. It's OnlyFans bullshit. Is prostitution illegal because it's just one of those ways that the old governor dudes are keeping women humble? I don't know that. I honestly don't know the history.

I was like, sometimes I wonder if it's from a history of when STDs are running rampant and so they set up this propaganda shit. That's the mysterious part of my brain. The case for making it against the law to buy sex begins with the premise that it's base and exploitative and demeaning to sex workers. Saying that legalizing prostitution helps pimps, fails to protect women, and leads to more back alley violence. Legalizing does?

Yeah. But the thing is, here's what I would, making it illegal forces them to, I thought, go to people who would traffic them. Whereas if it were, And they could regulate the industry with STD screenings.

Or if it were legal, They'd have safety from pimps. They'd not have to be connected to a pimp. Like crime rings. They could just do it themselves. Because a lot of human trafficking is done in prostitution. And I think that

I do think that if prostitution was legalized, I think there would be less sex trafficking, right? Because now people would be able to go work for a business to do it. It's like, oh, there's a prostitution business instead of having to like go with some some scary pimp dude that's so big scary pimps ryan mcgee the pimp that's pimp mcgee yep that's what they call me that's purple hatted pimp McGee. It's in my Irish blood. We Irish pimps. We Irish pimps.

Who always know what to do? Top of the morning, bitches. I'm your pimp. It's blue shirt guy. Dude, who is this blue shirt guy? Who is this blue shirt guy? You sound like Jordan Peterson. Jordan Pimperson?

He's Canadian, not Irish. Well, he sounds Irish. Yeah, you know, he has an Irish accent, though. Well, that's the thing, you know. You know, Jordan Pimperson. If one were to become more like, I don't know, just, I don't know, open your mind, man. I think the women ultimately should stay home and feed the kids and stop

wearing makeup in public because did he say that no we know no i'm a p he sets a pretty bad get upset but he's saying like well you know you wear makeup because it makes you more attractive you know it's sexual attractor. It's not fair. Men don't get to do that. Accentuates the lips. Blush makes the cheekbones come out. You know, these are things that you do to your bodies for intentional reasons. Otherwise, why would you do it?

Yeah, duh. It's like, why do people comb their hair? He said some pretty nasty stuff about women. Yeah, he said they should all go die. Yeah, he said they should all go die. Yeah, he said they should burn in hell. He said they should be launched to the sun. Every single woman. Hey, finally some peace and quiet, am I right?

You know? Wait, who was the, was it Colin Moriarty or whatever his name? Colin Moriarty? How do you say his name? What is that? That sounds like a fucking villain from like Sherlock Holmes. Colin Moriarty. How do you say it? Colin Moriarty. How do you say it?

Colin Moriarty. The guy from... Adventure Time? Colin Moriarty, yeah. The guy from... From what? Help me. Not Colleen Moriarty.

Help me help you. Help me help you. Whose line is it anyway? Colin, oh God. Just Colin. I know who you're talking about. No, it's not Moriarty. Was it him, him though who tweeted

like on like national women day of silence where it's like a post like women aren't speaking that and he's finally some peace and quiet and he just got fucking obliterated on twitter was it him? Jackson knows let me just look up women tweet

some peace and quiet because like a comedian says that in like it's yeah collie moriarty on twitter here it is he didn't never delete it ah peace and quiet hashtag a day without a woman it's just a coincidence or is it and let me see what people said uh i never thought he was funny i didn't either it's my favorite thing that people say whenever like something happens yeah I never thought he was funny I never did really find him funny though to be honest

what? Colin Moriarty they were all fun I thought the black dude was funny Ryan, Wayne Brady is that who it was? yeah that was fucking Wayne Brady brother on Newslines anyway? yes he'd sing all the time he was really good at it sportsman wayne brady what is wayne brady gonna

have to choke a bitch yeah that wayne brady yeah all right dude that's crazy ryan something ryan reynolds the blue shirt guy who was that blue shirt guy someone needs to find out who this blue shirt guy is and free guy they're going through all the clips of like ninja jackson like i have just jordan peterson like who is this he's at a lecture like with his microphone like so i'm sure you've heard of this blue shirt guy who is this blue shirt guy and you know he looks like he has a very a very good tailor. He cleans up well. He's responsible. You can take a look at him and know right from the start,

he has a very clean and organized living space, which also leads to a very clean and organized mind. How can you expect to change the world if you can't even pick up your own clothes, for God's sakes? I like to like obviously he's an intelligent man but i like the like the dudes on reddit and stuff that like he's like it's fucking genius and it's like dude he literally just says like go clean your room you should pick and choose what you know you people don't understand that like just you liking

or not liking but like agreeing with one thing someone says doesn't mean you have to agree with everything they say or like why what is that it's a helicopter are they circling us yeah they're probably coming to arrest us again dude shit okay hold on we'll um we'll be right back after let's have some sponsors and we'll go we'll go lock the doors yeah okay that was the pet Peterson copter. We are safe. We will stop talking about... Yeah. That guy. That blue shirt guy. Well, I'm sure I can find a picture of him in a blue shirt. Wait.

Right here, he's wearing a blue shirt. Now, blue shirt guy. God, that movie would have been... I didn't see it, but it would have been so good. It looks like a little Nancy boy. This this isn't someone i want my daughter dating i want my daughter dating someone with fur someone who could keep them warm at night a red shirt guy so who is this blue shirt guy so there's this guy and you might have heard about him a lot of people a lot of buzz in the media right now about this blue shirt guy and blue is also the color that the democratic party uses

so so just keep that in mind and who is this blue shirt guy. And blue is also the color that the Democratic Party uses. So just keep that in mind. Who is this blue shirt guy? Marvel is trying to get on the side of the Republicans by having their logo continue to be a beautiful red. Who is? Who is this blue shirt guy?

So Super Mega has once again made fun of my voice. Talking about as if I was in the movie Free Guy, which I was not. I was not in the movie Free Guy. I found blood in my urine. What? I have no idea what's going on.

I went to the doctor. Did he really say this? No. I could just see transitioning from talking about Israel to like... I found blood in my urine this morning. I urinated when I woke up and there was blood in it.

I called my doctor. I'm waiting for him to call me back. But they're not going to be able to see me for a while. But I think it's kind of urgent. Steven Crowder, like, who is this blue shirt guy? He's coming back, baby. All of these, like, right wing. He's coming back.

Steven Crowder? Yeah, he put out an announcement. From his health ailments? Fuck. He said, I'm bringing hell with me or something like that. Did he? I think so. It's badass, man. Wait, is he going to be even louder?

Wait, Joe Rogan effectively did what? Injected ivermectin. I'm not talking about a vaccine. Oh, great. He's having the horse paste shit. The horse dewormer. Hold up, hold up.

Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. It says, okay, YouTube. Tomorrow I'm back. 10 a.m. Eastern time. And hell's coming with me, you hear? And then in all caps, hell's coming with me. Dude, what if he actually... Hashtag Crowder comeback.

What if he actually brought Satan with him? Like he comes back. Because I told you I was bringing hell and he brings Satan with him. Have you ever seen that public access show of Satan? Like that guy did like the like the Satan public access show and himself read. I think so. And he gotten like he got the Nate this. He got I think arrested for it.

And the network's gotten a lot of trouble for the show nudity. Yeah. And he said a lot of swear words. But it's good. it's so good I love I have a certain nostalgia for shit like that like the creepy radio caller that came in what was that one

do you remember the one where the dude calls the radio station like um I don't have much time it was on the Art Bell show and he said that he worked at Area 51. And he's like, I've been on the road. They're tracking me down. And what's coming, Art, is mass destruction. And the elites, they know it's coming and they're not doing anything.

And then he gets cut off and the entire network goes down. Yeah. That's the part if that was not like staged by if it was only him and that was it like if it was only him and then you're like oh that's just some dude ranting and raving but like that shit went black if like if that wasn't planned like if that wasn't our bell being like all right we're gonna we're gonna goof him good if that actually like if that really just happened the way that they said, and you can listen to it online, it's freaky.

But like that actually is scary if that's the case. Then I'm like, all right, maybe he's being honest. I wonder like, Orson's guy was schizophrenia and really poor timing. Oh, true. But he said that there are disasters coming to curb the human population and they know this and they're not doing anything about it to stop them.

Nope. Because they're moving the elite now to bunkers. To Mars. To Mars. Yeah, dude. I don't think billionaires would want to live on Mars, man. How are they going to go eat their nice shrimp and caviar? They'll spend billions of dollars to create in-house sanctuaries

to replicate Earth as if they were outside, but it's still going to be technically inside. They're going to put a giant bubble around Mars. Instead of terraforming it, they're just going to build a big-ass bubble. It's going to be two pieces like a toy capsule and click them together. Mars is, I can't believe— And they're going to realize they didn't poke any holes in it. No!

I can't believe they poke any holes in it, like the air is coming from space. How they're going to realize they didn't poke any holes in it. No. No. I can't believe that poke any holes in it. Like the air is coming from space. How are we going to get the air in? It's so cool how Mars used to actually like have oceans and probably had a lot of life. Oh, well. Yeah. Fuck Mars. No fossil record.

Yeah. Well, we haven't explored Mars enough to know if there's fossils. We had that one sad ass uh drone not drone what is he rover rover that was like i'm cold and it's getting dark and then he and then it said like i i but why did it say that i think there's some dude i think someone programmed it to say that obviously it's gonna be so this is gonna be awesome i think i i mean it didn't speak for itself like hey guys i'm sentient by the way did it play a song it did on mars i played uh i'll be seeing you by billy didn't you say that like made you cry when you saw that yes i read i read like a description of

what happened and it was was actually incredibly touching. Look at this. It played this song right before it died on Mars. I'm trying to keep it away so I don't get copyright, but imagine that this just sitting on Mars, the sun is setting, and this is just echoing out loud through the barren landscape. You know? Dude. That's cool. Dude, I have to add

that to this month's playlist. I added it to my playlist earlier this year because I like driving the car and listening to it. I'll see you again. I'll be seeing you. I'll... I'll... be seeing you. Billie Holiday? I thought this was supposed to be a man.

Nope. No, of course. Any woman named Billie actually has a penis. Billie Eilish? Has a penis. Mm-hmm. 37 tracks now on this quarter's playlist. Woo! Which is a lot of fucking music.

My man. For me. I'm going to add that to my September playlist, actually. Yeah, because you said you only had two songs in some of your playlists. Well, way back when I would do month-to playlists like i can go back let's see where i'm at right now playlists are only like half an hour or this one of one was just four minutes but bb no money's in it let's go to bb no money it's only's one month Where it was only La La La And Sunny Day With Kill Bill the Rapper

And Rap La Oh Sunny Day's a good song Um Oh yeah So September I already have 15 tracks August

I had 33 July 25 June 48 My biggest one this year was See like you Like April with 55 You have so many

You have so much music Like in one month You'll find like Anywhere between 30 to 50 new songs or at least songs that you add to a playlist because you hear it again and you're like, oh, I'm nostalgic for that. Yeah. And also I loosened up my like qualifications for adding a song in my playlist because I used to be real picky about it and be like, oh, it only has to be like the best songs

I find. But then I got, it's like, no, i just want whatever i'm listening to right now instead of like just be chilling in your car and like you'll just get music on and i mean that's the main reasons because i want to shuffle i want to have a lot of music in my car but like if i go back i mean i was listening last night i was working on setting up my studio at my house which is finally coming together i finally got a good setup and I was listening every month. I like to go back and listen to that same month from other years. So I was listening to September, 2018, uh, last night, um, while I was, you know, sitting in my studio and it was so cool cause like just hearing those songs and also hearing those songs in that order that I hadn't

heard in so long, like just brought me straight back to that time period of September, 2018. And it was awesome. Um, that's why I like, I create, uh, that's why I like the end of each year. I create a year playlist so I can just go back to each individual year and just kind of like absorb it all. Yeah, man, it's, it's, it's really cool that you can, um, music can just take you back. You know, it's like, you can just like, there's know it's like you can just like there's that's why i like doing these playlists and i i encourage other people listening to uh if you don't find

enough music or listen to enough music to make a monthly one try making a quarterly playlist so four playlists a year and just whatever you're listening to put it in that time so then let's say in 2025 you can be like you can remember april of of 2021 or 2020 and how you were feeling and then you can go back and look at that music and it'll take you it's like a soundtrack for that part of your life and it'll take you right back uh even for the sad parts i like going back sometimes during the sad parts of my life and like listening back to him being like yeah i remember when i felt this way um my saddest time ever was february through april 2018 and the songs got real sad damn yeah february march and april but also there's some there's some of the best songs i think i have you could say something was interfering with your happiness

no we're not we're not. We're not leading into the Better Help Ad read that way. No, we already did it. Oh, but yeah, something was interfering with my happiness. Listen to this. It was like this type of music. Was that a girl moaning? No, it's a man moaning, dude. That wasn't a man moaning.

Rewind that. Dude, listen. It's a guy breathing in the microphone. But listen to this. Look how sad this is, dude. That's Windy by Richie Woods. Too much in the podcast. Nope, playing the whole song.

I need to make another. It's been a while, And people have been demanding and requesting That I make more Matt mixtapes on Spotify I mean on Patreon Is the next Matt Watson playlist on Spotify What's the next Matt Watson mixtape Um, yeah, so I definitely wanna

I've been thinking this week about making another Starting to get back on the monthly Matt Watson mixtapes on Patreon Um, even though it's like you know some people think that's a shitty perk but it's just an extra thing i like putting on there i have fun so we pay to get handed other people's music that i this let's player and technically people can just actually look up the playlists on spotify so you don't even know they can't uh actually no they can't. You have to be a patron.

I like making them just because it's... I love sharing music, and I think it's a cool way to... Also, I like on Patreon, we actually talk to you guys quite a bit in the Discord or comments, and I like doing... Well, I'll talk to them through burps and farts.

Ryan will enter the voice channel Ryan's Chambers and then wait for people to join, see what's going on. And then he'll just like rip ass and hang up. Or my favorite thing was when you left your car keys in there. Yeah. I wonder if people ever recorded you this shit. Probably not. It's so quick. That's the problem.

It's like, oh shit. We can do something right now. You want to jump into Ryan's Chambers real quick? Oh, someone's the problem. We can do something right now. You want to jump into Ryan's chambers real quick? Someone's in there. Should we ask them what they're doing? Did you leave your car keys in Ryan's chamber again? No, I left my sunglasses though. Oh, okay.

Okay, hold up. Go get your sunglasses. Hello? Hello? Hey. Ryan. what's up how are you uh i'm looking for my sunglasses have you seen them i might have left them in the chambers oh shoot uh i i have not um maybe they might be at your mama's house okay i'll check thank you They might be at your mama's house. Okay, I'll check.

Thank you. That guy has no idea he's on the podcast. No. He's going to listen and go, what? I love, I love, like, this happens every time we jump in. It's like, oh, Ryan. Ryan! It's like, they just see someone named Ryan. They're like, hey, Ryan.

Ryan! Or like, yeah. Or people would be like, think it's like a Matt Watts at the Fade of Cap. Like, oh, Matt Watts. Matt, woo! And then everyone jumps in at once and then starts speaking too loud. It's because I got them with a yo mama joke earlier. That same person?

They were asking what my at was, and I just replied at yo mama. Yo. Dude, did you see me kill Eddie Burback this week? Dude, ratioed not once, but twice. Something you tried to do to me, might I say. Which was very backstabby for a best friend. That's not something you would expect a best friend to do. Listen, man, I was in a dark place.

Maybe an acquaintance. I've grown from that. Maybe like a business acquaintance or something. Here, Eddie Burback, he's just trying so hard to get verified verified on twitter it's all he cares about some writing my article about him and i remember when i was there you can pay for it oh yeah i'll pay for his article yeah i don't have to you don't have to pay for an article to get written you just got to be a notable person eddie yeah then the then the narrative could be that you paid for an article for eddie and that's how he got verified. To help get him verified?

Yeah. Then he would owe me. Yeah. But basically, he was always asking, and I said, you know, as a verified user, I said, yo, Eddie, I know a way you can get verified. And he responded and was like, how? And then I said, D's nuts, with, like, all caps, laughing, crying emojis. Classic, man.

And he was like, I thought you were my friend. And then I responded, sorry, I had to. But actually, I do. I can. I know a way. And he said, how? And then I hit him again the next day. D's nuts.

Got him twice in a row. And then I posted the screenshot of it. And he tried. He was like, hey, Matt, I just thought of a funny idea for a tweet. And I said, cool. And then he responded with ligma balls. Yep. And then I just responded

with ratio and I ratioed the hell out of him and then he responded to that with trying to also get me back and then I said ratio part two and ratioed him again you didn't even remember what he put? no. what? why would I? he's not a notable person Ryan that's one of my proudest twitter

do you think back at Eddie's decrepit mansion lightning struck and he shook his two fists no matt watson yeah and he ripped his fake mustache off and threw it on the floor that's a what is it that's a dark eddie dark back eddie eddie dark back eddie bareback Eddie Darkback Eddie Eddie Darkback Eddie Bareback I love calling him Eddie Bareback my favorite category of Bareback's only described for gay porn

right I never see it straight porn bareback like man fucks woman bareback let me let me look up bareback what's the definition of bareback with your bareback on the whatever but a woman could would have a bareback yeah you could you could be what's the definition of bareback with your bare back on the whatever but a woman could would have a bareback yeah you could you could be i'm guessing definition of bareback i'm guessing it means your bare back is on oh or is it uh bareback on an unsaddled horse or other animal

oh uh in relation to sexual intercourse without a condom so i know that it means like without a condom but uh relating to or denoting sexual intercourse that's performed without a condom. So I know that it means like without a condom, but relating to or denoting sexual intercourse that's performed without a condom. Okay, wait, bareback vaginal. Oh, here's the Wikipedia page for bareback. Eddie bareback is a physical sexual activity, especially sexual penetration without the use of a condom.

The topic primarily concerns anal sex between men who have sex with men without the use of a condom and may be distinguished from unprotected sex because bareback sex denotes the deliberate act of foregoing condom use okay so i'm saying no i could use a condom to have gay sex no i'm not going to i'm going bareback bareback mountain is also a fantastic movie brokeback mountain bareback mountain uh slang term bareback sex comes from the equestrian term bareback, which refers to the practice of riding a horse without a saddle.

I'm trying to see how it originated for gay men. The term was used by GIs during the Vietnam War when sex without the use of a condom was known as going in or riding bareback. Going in, boys. The term was included in the 1972 publication Playboy's Book of Forbidden Words. Didn't they all get a bunch of STDs? Yes, because they were raping people left and right.

Whoa, dude. Soldiers? That's not cool. American troops wouldn't do that. American troops would never rape innocent women. They're the most honorable people. Think of Chris Kyle. Honorable man.

American rapist? No. That was the original title of the movie. I mean, they changed it to American Sniper. I'm just kidding. I'm not calling Chris Kyle a rapist. I don't know if he was. Brock Turner's a rapist. Brock Turner is a rapist. Barack Turner, more

like. Yeah, that's what I thought. Brock Turner is a disgusting rapist. And, uh... Don't believe everything you read, guys. He, uh, has been banned from the swimming association for life it's just not fair it's all because he's white too man i'm so pissed what they did to bro i love what his mom said in an interview it's like segregation but reversed now i like what his mom said his mom legitimately had the goal to say like in an interview like how torn

up he was over all of this like over being uh like having to go through the lawsuit she's like he's not even eating his favorite snacks anymore darn man he raped a woman and now he's so upset about being caught for raping a woman he won't even eat his favorite snacks the rice crispy my son can't even flirt anymore uh Well, Henry Cavill still says that you can't flirt in bars. You just can't flirt anymore. Yes, you can. You just can't aggressively, sexually

harass someone. Except that, like, you know, not everyone wants to be flirted with. It should be pretty easy. It should be like, hey, and if they're like, it should be real quick to tell if someone You can be social at a bar you know like there's nothing wrong with going up and talking to someone at a bar i could say i could like go up to your goal shouldn't be i'm going to fuck you and and if and you know if you if you see someone at a club or bar and you're like i

want to fuck this person and you go and flirt with them you know that's that's a pretty normal thing that happens at bars and clubs but it should be pretty within the first minute you can tell, like, if they're going to pick it up. Some people I don't think can take hints. They're just like, oh. Well, a lot of people, it's like, if I keep going, if I keep going, they'll finally, I'm going to wear her down. You know, I'm going to really, you know, she wants my dick.

She just doesn't know it yet. Yeah. So, don't be a creep at bars. I know that there's some SuperMaker fans listening to this that definitely would not know how to take a hint. Be a creep at casinos. Yeah, casinos is good. And especially the drinks are free. So you can say, can I get you a drink, baby?

And you don't even have to pay anything. And then she can watch you. You'll try to impress her and she'll watch you blow half your life savings and walk away. But when you're talking to people, this goes for women too, when you're talking to people schools for women too when you're talking to bars or clubs just take a hint just like just just really just just ease up there's plenty of fish in the sea and if this one specific partner is just not taking it so don't keep trying me yeah don't you go fishing for me i am with the kissing because that ain't no fun i got 99 problems but fish ain't one.

Officially, I feel like my conspiracy theory has... Weight to it? Has water to it? Has some weight to it. Because I feel like we had a good bit of listens, but I feel like the listens should have been higher. What are we at, 200,000 something? 200-something thousand.

But like Brand New Shirt has like a million. My Two Lovely Uncles has 800,000. You think like DTF with how we pushed it and with the music video, it would have been some more. Why is that, Ryan? Well, for some reason, it's listed as a, we've mentioned this before, but I'm going to complain about it again because this is my podcast with my friend, Matt Watson. And we, guide me on the right path?

I'm a bit intoxicated. What? I'm on crack cocaine. Oh, crack. Well, at least it's not the fentanyl you've been doing. Yeah, for some reason, we use DistroKid to distribute our music. It's listed as an audio book.

Yeah. Not a single. On desktop, it says it's a song. But it's a lie. On mobile, it says audio book. And it's like song but it's a mobile it says audiobook and it's like dtf is not a book super mega saves the troops as a book and you guys love it kid doesn't even allow doesn't allow distribution of audiobooks it's for songs i also i i emailed them or i dm them on twitter and they got back to me today someone else's problem i they said hi unfortunately i

can't be much help with this via twitter dm please reach out via our contact form at distrokid.com contact so maybe we'll hear back in six and it's not going to be recommended to anyone if it's a fucking audio book all right he's getting recommended to you guys out there we were in the car yesterday right now we're driving and some matt watson came on at random and i quickly changed it you recognized it right away i I appreciate that. But I, I, I. Did you see me look over it with a little cheeky grin

whenever I heard the first little boop? And I said, no, I played this on purpose, Ryan. I queued this up. Probably. You probably set it up so it would go during the drive. Like, oh, no, oof. Just, just to test me.

Sorry, you know, see how long it would take me to realize it was you. Sorry, man. My music just gets recommended so much by the algorithm, you know? Because I listen to so much good music. It does get recommended to me when I listen to my Spotify suggested shit sometimes.

And it's horribly embarrassing for me when I'm with a public group and my own song starts playing because it looks like I put my own music on. I'm like, fuck. Well, you'd think that they'd have something where it's like the artist wouldn't have to be recommended their own shit. That seems weird. Well, they don't know that I'm the artist because my Spotify account is separate from my Spotify artist account. Oh, there's no linkage, bro?

There's no linkage park? Come on. Love that band, dude. All right, I guess I should submit a request to DistroKid for help with this bullshit. Yeah, we need someone to help us kick ass. And we need someone to help us wrap up episode 261 of the podcast.

You want to do it, Ryan? Yep. Oh, oh, I'll end it with one last ocean joke. Oh, that's good. Okay. Is the music coming in? Yeah, the music's coming in.

Okay, are you ready, Matt? Yes. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Hold up, hold up. Okay. Why can elephants swim whenever they want to? Because they always have their trunks. Yep.

Okay, bye everybody. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs projects done well. I absolutely love this because you know if you own a home it can be really hard to maintain. It's hard to find people that can help you for a big project or a small. Well, whether it's in everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now, all you need to do is answer that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need. Angie has over 20 years of home service experience, and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process.

Bring them your project online or with the Angie app, answer a few questions, and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish, or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly, which means you can take care of just about any home project in just a few taps. Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I dot com.